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“Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug!”Than and the guys chanted as they raised their mugs and chugged their beers. Despite being 17 and being underage, it was completely legal in France to get drunk at the age of 16. Or so Jeannie Halverstad says. They were celebrating their success after Deandra won best hand modelling. Than didn’t get the aesthetic in modelling for hands but whatever floats their boat, he guesses.He’s wearing his new white blazer and showing off his bod as usual. Got it from that fancy store Mackenzie Zales brought him and the others to. They had some real good pants there. He enjoyed trying them out, as much as he enjoyed watching a certain brunette try on a couple clothes. He didn’t think he’d look so hot wearing those big dorky glasses. Than could’ve came at that moment.Jonathan put down his mug of beer for a second, trouble in his eyes. The other guys didn’t notice him. Thank fucking god for his aviator shades. Who the hell even wears shades indoors? It’s stupid but hey, the guys kind of got used to it so they don’t really bother him about it anymore. He’s Than. Nobody can tell him what to do! With his shades on, they didn’t catch him glancing at the guy beside him. The guy with the soft dark brown hair and pretty light blue eyes. God, he was mesmerizing to stare at. Than licked his lips and turned his gaze away. This budding thing in his chest is starting to freak him out. Ever since he kissed him in the comfort room that one time, he started having strange feelings for his friend. He jested about it a lot and hoped his attraction came out as just a joke. Did it?Matthew was saying something about chugging wine and went away from the table. Justin followed him, leaving Than with sweaty palms and a quick-beating heart. This is it, he thought. This might be my chance. Than ran his fingers through his blonde hair and sighed shakily. Truth be told, he wasn’t drunk yet. The drowsiness is creeping up to him, but he isn’t completely wasted like his friends were. He’d been a bit nervous while he was thinking up of a speech to tell Tanner his feelings. So far, it wasn’t quite progressive. All he could think about saying was how he’s got a good-looking dick. Yeah.. not so progressive.The party lights blared as he decided the time was now. The music hummed in the background as he focused his attention on the guy beside him. Tanner looked like he had enough to drink. A light blush on his cheeks and that serene look he has.Than cleared his throat. “Hey… Hey, Tanner,” at the last minute, he decided to act drunk. If things went bad, he could always blame it on the booze, right?“I don’t know if it’s the booze talking or if it’s Paris but, look, I’ve been meaning to tell you. I had–“ Tanner’s hand clamped his mouth shut. But in his drunken state, he more or less kind of slapped him on the lips. Oh. He wasn’t expecting that.“Shhhhhhhh. Than, I know. I-I know that you have feelings f-for me.” He stuttered and dropped his hand. Wait, what?“What? Who told you? Ugh god, I had this whole speech about, y’know, you having a good-looking dick. I could still tell it to you if you wanna hear it.” Than just let the words flow out of his mouth. He should be embarrassed at that point but who cares? Tanner’s drunk. Might as well tell him he’d like to suck said dick.“Than, I appreciate it. Okay? I appreciate it. It’s like, super flattering! But, I am monogamous with Tristan and I’m, like, totally in-love. I wouldn’t want to do anything to jeopardize that. Besides, when I think about it, me and you are like such good friends and I just think we’re better off as friends.” Tanner admitted. As much as Than hated to admit it, he was kind of let down by this.“We’re, like, friends.” For good measure, he repeated it after taking a sip of his beer.“Yeah, we’re like friends.” Than echoed in a false-cheery mood. Nothing to be worried about! The night is still young and he can still turn it in his favor. “Hey, have you ever jerked off a friend?” Than brought it up so casually that Tanner was caught surprised by it. He put his mug down on the table and laughed. Than took this as a sign to continue.“Y’know, like, in a friendly way? Have you ever really like, given a friendly blowjob?”“Shhhh, shut up! C’mon that’s, like, that’s funny. C’mon, let’s go get another drink. Like, let’s just go get another drink.” His drunk friend spun around and tried to head to the direction where the drink section was. Than followed behind him. “Let’s get another drink and talk about what exactly are the parameters of friendship.” He grinned and knew he could still convince Tanner for even just a small taste of what’s to come.After having a couple more drinks, the two of them continued their conversation. Than leaned his arm on the table and laughed at what Tanner said about not having a three-way with his boyfriend, Tristan. Jonathan thinks he looked okay. Kind of cute. But not his type. Unknowingly, his eyes roamed Tanner’s body while the other was busy drinking. The more they talk, it seemed, the more the two friends became closer. Figuratively and literally. They don’t know who moved first but as their conversation wandered into forbidden territory, Than and Tanner were as close as a goddamn closed door.“Do you ever wonder what it’s like to kiss someone who’s been drinking tons of beer? Will their lips, like, taste like beer too?” Than asked.“I dun-don’t know, Than. It should t-taste like lips. Lips and beer. I wouldn’t know.”“Well, I’m up for finding that out. Like, I’m totally open for some researching, y’know?” He chuckled. He should be worried that Tanner’s been downing a couple glasses already. Maybe it’s time for him to stop. He grabs Tanner’s half-empty glass of beer and slowly pulls it away from him. To his luck, Tanner lets go.“Thaaan, you are so funny! But nah. Researching.. takes up too much time. Y’know what I mean?” Tanner stares at the table, fingers dancing on the top.“Yeah, I get you. Like, who has time to do some research papers on that? That’s like, really st—““No, Than. I mean, why not t-try it out yourself? Since you’re sooo curious,” Tanner laughed.“Is this permission to make out with you? ‘Cause if so, I’d be happy to!” Jonathan grinned and started to inch closer. Tanner’s hand came up and pushed him on the chest lightly. His soft chuckles brought Than’s eyes to his lips.“No, Than! I told you, I’m in a happy r-relationship with Tristan. I can’t just, like, kiss you!” Tanner’s laughing like it’s such a funny joke.“So, you’re suggesting I up and kiss a random French dude in this room? Preferably someone drunk to make this “research” work? Like, have you seen the dudes in here? They’re either 30 or 50, I don’t fucking know man,”“Huh, good point.” Tanner mumbles. Than looks up and decided to nudge at his direction again.“Y’know, it’s not so bad. It’s like, going to be super short. Maybe a peck. Or two. Just enough to satisfy my curiosity,” Both were silent for a while. With their proximity, one would think the two friends were two lovers whispering sweet nothings into each other’s ears. Than waited patiently for a reply. For a second, he thought, shit, am I pressuring him too much? He’s going to hate me forever. But then, Tanner looks at him with a dazed smile.“A peck or two won’t do.”
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One thing led to another and both males ended up in Than’s room in the hotel they were staying in. Than’s gotta admit, he hasn’t been tidy with unpacking and his stuff is just everywhere. Namely... phallic-like stuff.“Whoaaaa. What the hell, I d-didn’t expect this from you, Than,” Tanner gazed at Than’s collection of dildos. Just what the hell was he thinking inviting Tanner in his room while his sex toys were scattered around the room? It was embarrassing watching the other male acknowledge said sex toys. But whatever. His friend was drunk anyway so when he leaves later, he’ll probably just forget all about it.“Heh. Yeaaaah. That dude Shaw told me all about it. He’s a cool guy, y’know?” Than sat on his bed and watched Tanner. He remembered Shaw. It was cool spending time with someone who just understood him. He knew the good shit. His friends just didn’t get him. Maybe that’s why Matt and the others just don’t see him the way Than saw him. But yeah, cool guy.“W-wait, did you and Shaw ever..”“What? Oh, nahh, he wasn’t a dildo-kind-of-guy. He just kind of shared what all his exes did in the bedroom and what kind of nasty shit— I mean, foreplay they engage in.” Than shrugged. He never really explored deeper into his sexuality yet but maybe meeting Shaw nudged him in the right direction. Also his friend is gay. So maybe Tanner could teach him a thing or two about “being gay”.Tanner sat on the bed beside him and he tensed. Here he finally is, alone in the room with Tanner Christiansen. Was he supposed to do something? Why did the air all of a sudden get hot around him?“Okay, I know this isn’t pr-professional of me, but have you ever slept with.. someone?”“Slept? Yeah, dude, countless girls!”“Than..”“Okay, not exactly countless. There was that one time with Brittnay. She preferred anal though. I had no problem with that.”“The devil herself? God, Than, okay but have you ever tried it with a dude?” At this point, Than could swear that Tanner started blushing. It was probably from all that alcohol he drank.“Ummm.. I gueeess?”“Really? I don’t believe you. Okay, sooo how did it go?”“It started with some.. well, with some making out. A couple kisses and, uh, some tongue action.”“Really, Than? Who’s the guy?”“Shaw. It wasn’t a big deal or anything. He was just showing me the ropes, is all.”“Shaw?! You fucked my b-boyfriend’s cousin?”“I didn’t have a lot to work with! I’m not complaining or anything. It was quite nice actually. Unless you’re willing to show me how it’s reaaally done then I don’t mind one bit.” Than wiggled his eyebrows. He knows he’s getting ahead of himself but still, he couldn’t help teasing his friend. Tanner was cute. A lot cuter when he’s frustrated and looks like he wants to punch Than in the face.His friend was still red in the face but now, he was laughing. “No, Than, how many times do I have to repeat myself? I can’t just kiss other dudes.”“Aw, c’mon! I promised it was going to be like, one peck. Besides, we already kissed one time so this shouldn’t be hard or anything.” A flashback of what happened a few seasons ago came back to him. Tanner’s lips were hella soft and wow, okay, so that did make him gay. Or was he gay before that? But nonetheless, he enjoyed every second of that.“You surprised me. Than, even if it’s just a peck, it’s still going behind my boyfriend’s back—“Than moved closer and put his arm around the other guy. “Than..” Tanner warned him half-heartedly but he didn’t back away when he approached. This encouraged the small spark Than felt. In fact, if he put more thought into it, his friend actually leaned into his touch.“I promise, just.. one kiss. That’s all I ask. I know I’m not the best guy out there and I know you’re together with Tristan. But fuck, since the day I met your lips, I just couldn’t goddamn stop thinking about them. Ugh, okay, I’m sounding a bit pathetic, aren’t I?” He bit his lip. If I could just.. Than brought his other hand to Tanner’s cheek. To his surprise, the other guy didn’t push him away in disgust. This was going according to plan very well.He delicately tested brushing his fingers against his cheek. There was doubt in Tanner’s eyes, but also something akin to curiosity. Than leaned forward ever so lightly.“Just one,” He whispered when he got in closer proximity. As if asking for permission, he stared into Tanner’s eyes through his sunglasses, assuming Tanner could see his eyes, and looked at his lips. He gave him the option to back away. Waited a second for his friend to realize what he was doing. But was Than going to miss this opportunity of a lifetime? He’d been dreaming of kissing those lips again. He wishes that he could always kiss them. But fate has him tied by the neck. The one guy he fell in love with is taken.And so he sealed the deal. He brought his lips to Tanner’s and, in fear of startling him, paused before slowly moving his lips. His fingers brushed against his cheek once more and kissed him again. This wasn’t anything like their first kiss. This was gentler and it wasn’t some sloppy lips-to-lips. He could feel his heart beat faster in anticipation. Did Tanner hear that? That heart was beating for him. Just when he thought his friend let himself sit there and be used for kissing, Tanner actually kissed back! This got him worried for a second but it felt so good to feel him move against his lips. It’s the booze talking. It’s making him kiss back, isn’t it? Whatever, ask and you shall receive, Than thought selfishly. Let the night be kind to him for once. He’s done daydreaming.Than let his lips linger for a while, the ecstasy of it slowly easing down on him. When he moved back, he saw Tanner still had his eyes closed. No disgust whatsoever on his face.“That was quick.” Than whispered and smirked at him.Tanner surprised the two of them by slowly lifting off Than’s sunglasses and leaning close to connect their foreheads. Than couldn’t help but look into the boy’s light blue eyes. He has never looked directly into someone else’s eyes without his sunglasses. Hell, even when he and Brittnay were fucking, he refused to take them off. “Not bad, Than,” Tanner commented. Boy, did it make his heart want to burst out of his chest. He couldn’t think of anything at the moment ‘cause he was so tongue-tied. He smiled and let his hand wander up into the other guy’s hair, combing through it.“You’re not so bad yourself, dude,” he stares a moment longer. Will this ever end? He hopes not. Tanner still doesn’t back away. Is this supposed to be a sign? Than wondered. Yes, he thinks, as both males lean towards each other again to accompany each other for the night.
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When Than woke up that morning, he had the largest grin on his face. He could not believe that he just spent the night making out with the dude he’s had a huge crush on since, well, it seemed like forever. God, he can’t get his mind off of how Tanner kissed him. It was so hot. Yeah, Than still couldn’t believe it.It was light at first. His hand caressed Tanner’s cheek as he tried to deepen the kiss last night but the other boy just giggled and it distracted him. He didn’t mind. It was a lovely thing pressing his lips to Tanner’s while the other was laughing. It was contagious and Than had no problem being blue-balled if this was the reward. Okay, maybe I do mind a bit, he thought. The cycle would repeat. They were light-hearted kisses and mostly a bunch of drunken laughter. It was selfish of him to expect more action that night or at least some groping. But all the other boy did was grip onto the lapels of his blazer as if he was anchoring him down. Than smiled at the memory. Oh yeah, he also remembered the part where they took off their clothes. But that was when–A sudden obnoxious ringing cut off his thoughts. That’s just Tanner’s phone, he shrugged. He heard the brunette beside his groan and turn to his side. The beer they drank that night must’ve gotten to him. He hears his friend mumble something under his breath. Than chooses that moment to glance at him.“Morning!” he greets him enthusiastically.It takes Tanner a moment to realize where he is and what he’s doing in Than’s bed. He wouldn’t admit it but Than thinks it’s kind of funny. And as expected, his friend jumps up and screams. Alright, maybe I wasn’t being subtle enough, he thinks as he sits up to try to comfort him.“Whoa Tanner, Jesus. Keep it down, buddy. I’m still... pretty hungover.” That wasn’t a complete lie. He still felt a light buzzing in his head.“Than, what the fuck are you doing in my bed?” Ouch. Well, it’s safe to say that he probably doesn’t remember a thing from last night. Than grimaces internally and maybe also on the outside. It passes off as part of his hangover. “Your bed? Hey, you’re in my room.” He retaliates and glances off to the side. Maybe the hangover really is starting to get to him. As he combs back his hair with his hand, he observes Tanner from his peripheral vision. It wasn’t ever meant to be, was it? It was just a one night thing. It wasn’t like we fucked or anything, dear god. The making out was awesome though. He lets a tiny smile slip on his face.“Sorry. I’m kind of a messy unpacker.” He apologizes when he sees panic start to rise in him. The dildos were never a good impression. He shouldn’t have made this anymore awkward than it should be.“Oh my god, why did I drink so much last night?” Tanner falls back on the bed in despair.Than finally stands up and decides to poke at their situation. Couldn’t get any worse than this, right?“Oh yeah, you were an animal, sir.”“Holy shit, this can’t be happening. What is wrong with me? I’m an awful person.” He hears his mutter repeatedly. Than suddenly feels guilty for making fun of him. He sits down beside Tanner and puts an arm around his shoulders. Platonically.“Hey, hey relax man. I’ll tell you what. Last night will just be between me and you.” Than smiles at his friend. He hopes this won’t ruin their friendship. But maybe it’s too late for that. He rises and walks to the other side of the room while maintaining his composure. He can’t let him see that he’s bothered by this. Than will find a way out of this problem, even if it means lying to him just to get his friend back.“So hey, do you wanna order some room service? I’m thinking mac and cheese.” He grabs the menu off his table and flips through a couple pages. He hears a rustling noise and looks behind him.“Tanner?” but his friend is nowhere to be seen. A dull ache pangs in his chest. Than knew he screwed something up.He sits on his bed and lets the emptiness of his room wash over him. Just a few seconds ago, it was full of life. Now, it all seemed to crash down on him. He made out with Tanner last night. Tanner has a boyfriend. He must be delusional to think that everything is going to be alright between them. He was such a fucking idiot! Why did he let his hormones get the best of him?Than looks down and twiddles his fingers in thought. Mackenzie is going to bite his ass later on for being late for his contest. But that bitch can shove it. There’s no doubt Tristan already knows what happened between them. But... from the looks of things, Tanner though they fucked last night? It’s the dildos, wasn’t it? Than facepalmed. Also the fact that he didn’t have any pants on. He can’t blame him for feeling all warm sweating his butt out in those jeans. And besides, it was Tanner’s choice to take it off last night to cool off and get some sleep. What did he think Than did?The boy in the room groaned in frustration and fell back against his bed. Everything was going so well. He confessed last night and he was even treated with acceptance. A grim thought emerged from the depths of his mind. If he was right, Tanner and Tristan would be in a fight. Possibly even on the verge of breaking up. He can’t stand to see Tanner so broken. Because of him.Than knows what he’s planning is only going to bury his heart in a deeper ditch. It’s going to haunt him till the end of his days. But anything is worth it just to see Tanner happy and free of any problems with him. Deny, deny, deny. When the time comes, he’ll do it. He’ll tell him nothing happened. No fucking. No undressing. Tanner did that to himself. And certainly... no making out. If he’s going to come clean, he might as well forget the moment they had. It would do no good if he confessed they kissed for hours. It will still leave a burning guilt within his friend. Than decides that it’s better if he carries the burden. He can’t be the obstacle to Tanner’s happiness. And so, he will do everything to make sure Tanner knows that nothing happened between them last night, nothing at all. The booze already helped with that. Everything was just misinterpreted when Than decided to open his fucking mouth.I’ll think of something. He gets up from his bed, combs back his blonde hair, and walks out the door, ready to face another day in Paris.
End.