Work Text
Harry looked amongst his friends as he held his trunk firmly in his hands, "You're not going to change my mind you know," he said lazily as his tongue ran over his lip thinking about the adventure ahead. "We know Harry - but we all just think that maybe you should have told us earlier and we could of sorted out a better plan," Hermione explained as her bushy brown hair bounced with the fast movements of her hand."Hermione's right, Harry. We don't like the idea of you doing this. Why didn't you tell us earlier?" Ginny agreed, her brown eyes worried as the rest of her face remain calm."Because Dumbledore told me I wasn't meant to tell anyone, me telling you now is already breaking his rules!" He stressed. Hermione panicked at his last phase."But Harry-""No. I'm sorry..." Harry threw his head back as he felt emotions swaying him into a nauseous feeling of guilt and unhappiness. He didn't want to do this, but if Dumbledore was right (and he usually was) he'd be the only one who could save the world that they lived in now.
"Mate..." Ron's face held an empty expression as he proceeded the information "You're leaving? And we'll never - we'll never exist will were?" "What? Of course we'll exist Ron, don't be a bloody idiot!" Ginny snapped, glaring at him with the look that many knew belonged to the legendary Molly Weasley."He's right Ginny," His voice was barely audible, it was a surprise anyone heard it at all. Harry swallowed down his nervousness as he looked at the confusion cross her face and felt himself wish he could hold her tight and never let her go. "Ginny you'll have to forgive me," he murmured, a scowl forming on his face as he swallowed the bile that built in his throat - he felt so distant yet this may very well be his final time ever seeing his friends. These friends he had grown to adore, the ones that had given him purpose - looking into Ginny's eyes as she stood without reply, being met with a gaping expression filled with a mixture of shock and horror on her face.
"So essentially, you are saying that you plan on going back to 1977 to change everything that has happened since. So," Hermione spoke quietly, a notch higher than a whisper, the tears that sat in her eyes glittered with that same charming quietness. Harry watched as his friends' faces looked to her, taking in breathlessly the stammering girl process this new load of information - the information they dared to say aloud. "This timeline would have never existed... So who we are now won't exist. This world won't exist. H-how?"Running his hand through his hair, he looked miserably at his friends as he felt himself recall the words Dumbledore had told him. The summer before her been murdered, "I'm to be a paradox - the one thing that will keep my memories as I form the new present, keeping balance between the universe of space and time," Ron looked horrified as the group stated at him in a mix of confusion."No objections? We're decided then," Harry told them as he turned as he turned around not ready to face them.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Harry ignored the yells of protests, it had only made him feel worse about the whole situation, 'And so you should!' A voice seemed to scream in his ear. Harry scrunched his eyes shut as he locked the door behind him, grabbing his trunk and Hedwig's cage. Breathing deeply, he dug for the cursed letter in his jeans.Holding it tightly, he whispered the incarnation and felt himself go light headed, strangely the banging on the door seemed to fade away. The latter leaving his fingers as he faded from existence.Regaining his senses, Harry looked around to find himself still holding onto Hedwig's cage and his trunk. Good. Noticing his surroundings, he identified that he was still standing in the abandoned classroom he'd stormed into. Gladly, it still remained to be empty and unused.Opening the door he dad many students walk past him, a few girls winking at him - making him blush as they giggled."Hullo James!" One girl yelled excitedly, waving like an utter lunatic.'James?' That was a strange thought. Harry had not previously considered the possibility that people he knew would join him as peers in this new time, much less his parents. His parents, attending school? With him nonetheless, Harry felt helplessly surprised by the idea, giddy and nervous.Not thinking straight, he rushed towards his needed location. Hoping the brilliant Albus Dumbledore of this time was just as smart as his counterpart in Harry's time.He slowed down as he reached the corridor in which the entrance to Dumbledore's office could be found. Running his tongue over his lips he walked over slowly, it was now that all this anxiety came rushing at him now. He didn't know the password, so instead he banged loudly hoping to grab the attention of the aged headmaster.The door opened and Harry was met with the perplex facial expression of Dumbledore himself."You're not James are you?" The old man asked, a chuckle resting at the end of his tongue. Harry shook his head, grinning from ear to ear. "I feel it would be best if I allowed you into my office then," he said calmly, a smile playing at his lips "shall we then?" He opened the door a boy wrist as Harry ducked and hopped in.Harry eagerly walked up the stairs, putting his trunk and Hedwig down as he stepped into the messy office."And what is it, if I may ask, that brought you to Hogwarts?" Dumbledore asked, as peered over his glasses - a flitter of a twinkle in once of them.Harry recalled many things his Dumbledore had told him in preparation for his travel but how to explain it when questioned about it - well he can assure that was most definitely skipped. "I was told you would know what to do, sir," he said, shrugging slightly. Looking around Dumbledore's officer to see it still had an immense amount of things scattered around that Harry swore he would struggle to identify."Hmm," Dumbledore mused, plopping a lolly into his mouth. "And who would it be... That told you to come to me?"Harry couldn't help but wonder if he'd ever seen a surprised Dumbledore. "It was you sir, you told me you'd know what to do," he explained, pushing down a smile."Me?" Dumbledore still remained to have his blank face, causing Harry to feel stupid for trying to surprise him."Only my memories are evidence, sir," Harry told him, wondering how he could convince Dumbledore to believe him so he could continue his mission."Memories? I believe I'd be able to work with that as long as I would have your consent of course," Dumbledore asked, meeting Harry in the eye. Harry nodded dumbly as he watched the older man pick himself up from his desk and took uneven steps towards him, swallowing away his nervousness Harry proceeded to tell himself happy thoughts - but thinking about Ginny's pretty red hair was only making him feel worse about being here.Feeling Dumbledore piece through his mind, he let down whatever useless defenses he'd had up. He could feel Dumbledore browsing through his memories, looking for one that would prove Harry to be correct in his previous statements.Then he felt it. The memory pushed to the front of him and he felt Dumbledore pause and then the memory played. "Professor?" Harry watched as the headmaster clasped his hands together and placed around his office."Harry," Dumbledore's voice was quiet and seemed almost sickly "I am afraid to say I have some - unfortunate news. Sadly I hear that a new prophecy has come into light, and should take place in you're late seventh year,""But professor, why is it that you tell me now and not tell me when I'm in seventh year then?" Harry asked cautiously, his face guarded.Dumbledore shook his head slowly. "I'm afraid, this prophecy asks you to leave this time and to fix the past," he told his student sadly.Harry stood there speechless, trying to render what the old man had tried to explain to him. Travelling in time?!Dumbledore struggled to reply but a sad and almost guilty look took refuge in his eyes. "I have little information now, but do trust that I'll be alerting you over the following year on more information that may assist us," Dumbledore muttered meekly as he avoided looking at Harry.Harry felt Dumbledore leave his mind and he let out a shaky breath."You've traveled through time?" Dumbledore said at last as he reseated himself behind his desk. Harry nodded. "Then it would appear that I would have been wrong to doubt you," Dumbledore smiled cheekily "does your job here involve you needing to stay?""Yes sir, I hope that won't cause you any trouble," Harry informed him."I'll go fetch the sorting hat," he grinned.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Harry felt the familiarity of the sorting hat go over his head, an old voice once returning."Mr Potter, eh?""Mind getting it over with? I've got plans," Harry responded, clucking his tongue impatiently yet stopped himself from saying anything else."Very well, very well" the cocky voice of the hat decided "you wouldn't like Slytherin?" Harry grumbled "ver well-""GRYFFONDOR!" It shouted, Harry stood up and removed the worn hat from his head and passed it to Dumbledore."You may head to the Great Hall with me, but if I may - could I have a fake name to introduce you by?" Dumbledore asked calmly, unfolding his hands as he stood up to lead Harry out the door.Harry hesitated, he hadn't sat down to think about an alias. That was the sort of thing that Hermione would have had figured out already. He could keep his first name... But Potter had to go, maybe something simple..."Harry Smith, sir," his voice said coolly, where was he finding such confidence?Dumbledore nodded, he stroked his bead. "Follow me Mr Smith," Dumbledore explained, Harry reached for his trunk, "No need, I'll have them delivered to your dormitory."Harry put his items down, and as he turned to follow the headmaster out he spared Hedwig one last glance. Students gave them only minimal looks as they zigzagged through the corridors of the great and beautiful Hogwarts School. Strange enough, a scent of rosemary and freedom seemed to stick towards its halls, unlike the scent of fear that saturated the Hogwarts of Harry's era. ❧Harry felt himself lose breath when he stepped foot into the great hall, kingdoms of food deigned the tables with a sense of beauty. The chattering of students danced across the room, filling Harry with a sense of relief to know that people could be themselves and know that not their every word was going to be listened to and reported.He was thrilled! Here people were safe, no one was being endangered for his sake. He stood to the side of the professors' table, watching excitedly as Dumbledore brought attention to himself."Attention students," the headmaster exclaimed, "I am very excited to tell you that Hogwarts had been gifted with a transfer student! Please treat the new seventh year Gryffondor Mr Smith with as much respect as you would anyone else."The students clapped as Harry waved meekly at the crowd of students, receiving a nod from Dumbledore, Harry made his way down to the Gryffondor table. Harry planted himself in the only spare spot he could find. When he looked up to see who sat across from him he was surprised to see what he'd almost mistook for his reflection. But then it clicked, he knew exactly who it was..."Hello, I'm James Potter, and you'd be?"
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Harry planted himself in the only spare spot he could find. When he looked up to see who sat across from him he was surprised to see what he'd almost mistook for his reflection. But then it clicked, he knew exactly who it was..."Hello, I'm James Potter, and you'd be?"Harry felt his heart race, an emergent sound piercing his hearing. He gaped slightly, a dumb and nervous look took over him. This was his father, Harry's very own father! The thought - although foreign - left him excited, and thrilling for more. Here, in this time, friendless as he may be - but with a family. 'A family that didn't know who he was,' a voice that sounded particularly like Malfoy sneered cruelly in his mind."Excuse me?" James snipped, looking at him pointedly, "you shy or something?" Harry flushed embarrassed, he spluttered an apology as he watched as his father seemed to be reading him. 'He's judging you,' the Malfoy voice whispered in his mind dazedly. "Don't need an apology. Need an introduction," his father said bluntly, not exactly rude but not very nice either."Smith, Harry Smith," he informed his father shyly, taking in every detail and aspect of his father. Messy dark hair like his, he and his father had matching noses too - noses that weren't elegant but a straight shape that could be appreciated from afar. His father had hazel eyes, from pictures Harry had always assumed them to be brown but in real life they were a hazel that held a friendly yet arrogant look in them, Harry swallowed this information greedily. His uniform was ruffled, but James seemed to have done it on purpose - not even bothering to put his red and gold Gryffondor tie on properly."Well Mr Smith, Mr Harry Smith, I'm very glad to inform you that you'll be sharing a room with the wondrous person that is known as me," James told him clearly, Harry shot him a toothy grin."Look forward to it," Harry said sweetly, hoping not to embarrass himself anymore than he had to. "Calm you pants down mate," James laughed good heartedly "no need to be that thrilled, as long as you stay out of my way your fine."Harry faltered slightly, trying not to break optimism as he watched James cautiously. "Stay out of your way? I'm sorry, but-"Before the Potter-from-the-future could speak he was interrupted by a lower voice, "Don't worry about Jamie over here, he's just looking for a way to be total dick." Harry turned to the speaker, a tall boy next to James. His hair was clean and went past his shoulders, he held himself in a way that showed how in control he was as if no witch or wizard could speak to him without apologising in the end. This look although faded in his time, couldn't be more obvious, Sirius.Sirius smirked at him, and Harry felt heat rise in his cheeks and he couldn't label why they were doing that. "He-hello, I'm Harry," he stumbled stupidly, "but you already know that." Harry felt ready to face palm at himself, what the bloody hell has him stammering so stupidly to his godfather. You'd think battling Voldemort would give him some confidence?Sirius chuckled lowly at him, but continued to hold his posture in the same superior manor. Harry couldn't help but notice the way he appeared so different from his post-Askaban self, shiny white teeth certainly outshone his future's black rotten ones, or the way his face was so well cleaned and soft that Harry struggled to picture him as his forever-dirty-no-matter-how-much-you-scrubbed godfather."See something you like mate?" Sirius asked,moralising a fine eyebrow. Harry shook his head, the red of his face contrasting well with the emerald green of his eyes. "Pity, could use a good snog right now," he muttered mischievously."What?" Harry replied dumbly, 'kiss another boy' that was something simply unheard of in the Hogwarts of his own time,"Leave the kid alone Pads," another boy interrupted, a bored look on his face as he snagged a bread roll from James' plate. "Like James said, he's probably just shy, no need to interrogate him less you want catastrophic results.""Yeah like I said!""Shut it tosser! And Moony 'Ol boy, why you gotta use a big word in a sentence? You do know that I will just assume it means you love me," Sirius retorted playfully, his grey eyes sparkled vividly as he spoke, and Harry couldn't help but watch him intensely.The newly identified Remus Lupin shook his head solemnly, "you're going to spook the poor bloke before you even know his favourite colour," he said sarcastically, he looked up to the enchanted ceiling - staring uneasily at the moon. Poor guy, Harry couldn't help but think."Oh really, well I'm sure I can prove you wrong," Sirius said challengingly, Remus looked back down and raised an eyebrow. "I'll figure out 'Ol Larry's favourite colour in no time!""Sure, but I might start with getting his name correct if I were you," Remus agreed, looking intently at an unfazed Sirius Black."It's red," Harry offered uncomfortably, watching as Sirius shot him a grateful smile."Guys, I hope you're not replacing me," a squeaky voice whined sarcastically, Harry turned to see a boy only an inch or two shorter than Sirius, who had short blond hair that was spiked up in a way that Harry was sure could never be in fashion. The shorter boy was smiling up at them and had vibrant blue eyes that seemed so cheerful that it made Harry sock for a reason that he couldn't identify. The shorter boy spotted him staring and shot him a wink, making Harry go red in a way that wasn't showing that he was flattered. The boy stuck out a hand, his fingers were short and a little plump but Harry shook it regardless. He spoke quickly, and didn't seem to leave time for interruptions, "Peter Pettigrew, and why'd you come to this school?"The only reason Harry knew he'd stopped blushing was for the pure reason that he'd paled considerably after Peter's introduction. He couldn't tell what he was meant to feel; anger at his betrayal, sorry that he went down the wrong path, sad at his own memories of their original introduction, or to ignore it all because the boy in front of him hadn't done any of what made him so emotional. Back when he'd first heard news of his time travel expedition, Harry had thought long and hard about what to do with his enemies - and sadly at that time he had glossed over Pettigrew, simply thinking he'd be able to carefully avoid him. "You okay mate?" Peter asked, his face dipped into slight concern, and Harry had to look down at his plate."Pete, maybe you shouldn't divulge into Smith's business, there is a war going on," James said slowly, patting his friends shoulder but he watched Harry curiously."It's not a big deal anyway," Harry mumbled, piling some food onto his plate. "Anyway, if it's - um - alright for me to ask, how far into the school year are we?" He questioned softly, looking around to the boys around him, as he cut a sausage in half."Two weeks, but if you're worried about being behind I can always assist you," Remus answered helpfully, his own fawn coloured hair falling sweetly in front of tired eyes."No thanks Moony, I'm sure Harry would much rather do fun stuff. Right?" Sirius said cheerfully, turning to look at him brightly. His face seemed so playful and innocent that Harry couldn't but think of him as a puppy, something so cute and huggable and... Harry almost went red when he thought about it."Well, I ugh, don't mind?" He returned simply, shrugging his shoulders shyly as the eldest Black brother pouted at him."Hurry up and finish your dinner Smith, we want to show you our dorms now," James pestered him, mimicking the look of a misbehaving child who only knew how to get what he wanted by tantrums. James, seemed so sociable that Harry had wished to have been able to inherit his confidence."What do you mean by 'we' Prongs, as you can see - I'm also still eating," Remus started, the same bland look on his face but an ultimate twist by a small smile spreading on his face.James ignored him by waving him off. He acted in a way that Harry had seen so rarely, removing the simple persona he held in front of so many friends of Harry's but had broken for him and occasionally his Godfather."Piss off Moony," he shot cheekily, pushing his rectangular glasses up the bridge of his nose as they slid down. "Lord knows that you have the hunger of a wolf," Harry watched as Remus shot him a dark look that was complete opposite of the smile on his face - Remus didn't mind the werewolf jokes."Oh deer, James. It appears you've got yourself in the doghouse," Sirius retorted, his voice so sincere that Harry would've almost mistaken it for an actual conversation had he not known the pitiful jokes behind it. In all honesty, Harry wanted to laugh, their animagus jokes were so pathetic it was hilarious.Their jokes continued as the time traveler made his way through his long awaited dinner. He lived in utter bliss, with a school still intact and a family still alive and breathing. And even when horror still lurks he sits here, with food on his plate, roof over his head, and a family (although they don't know it) telling jokes.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Harry gazed up at them, his green eyes flicking from marauder to marauder. They were leaving the feast early, showing Harry the way to the Gryffondor common room. They seemed to making references to inside jokes, ones that Harry struggled to understand. They were mostly to do with 'a furry problem,' and pranks that had happened years previously. Harry watched them from behind, following them without question as they led him up the moving staircases. He watched Sirius and James chat with an enchanted vision, it was they way they spoke that brought hope to him. How they smiled and laughed, and they acted like there was no day like the present.Sirius, him in particular brought out the curiosity in him. His actions towards James were much different to the way he knew him. He gestured to everything with his left hand but his right hand was usually always touching James - most often just resting against his shoulder.Almost forgetting from years of experience and lack of attention, Harry felt himself fall. The trick step. It had snapped under him and his leg was now left dangling while the rest of him layer stiff and horrified.The marauders turned back to him, seemingly forgetting he was with them."A little help please?" He asked timidly, scratching at his messy head as an uncomfortable smile lay plastered on his face."Sorry about that mate," James apologised, offering a hand to pull him up. Graciously, Harry accepted although it ended up being useless trying to pull him out. "They're the trick steps, you've gotta be wary of them." Harry nodded, although he knew this already it brought a small smile to his face to receive advice from his father.Sirius jumped behind him, and despite Harry's objections, wrapped his arms around his waist and pulled him out. Harry spluttered, turning red - from embarrassment he was sure. The three boys laughed quietly at his flustered face. Harry gaped, and tried to pull Sirius' arms off him. It was useless. Sirius chuckled, and started walking up the stairs again with Harry in his arms."Let me go!" Harry squeaked, hitting Sirius as all the marauders grinned wickedly at him."Why would I do that?" He asked. His lips close to his ear suggestively as he spoke in a low voice - one Harry was not quite used to and wished to run away. "We wouldn't want you to fall again?""I'm fine honestly, so if you could just put me down-" Harry didn't finish as he felt himself drop to the ground. Holding his balance, he glared at Sirius who looked on innocently. "What the hell?" He grumbled, rubbing his knee as he continued following the snickering marauders as Sirius only turned to wink at him."You didn't want me to carry you." He shrugged, looking at him victoriously."Not like that." He scowled, crossing his arms.Sirius raised an eyebrow. "So you want me to carry you?""No!" Harry gaped. "I didn't want to be dropped halfway through a sentence."There was no reply, as Sirius grinned and stuck his tongue out at Harry.When they arrived at the Gryffondor common room, Harry wavered in front of the entrance. Should he pretend to be confused or act as if it was something normal. It wasn't like Harry knew if other wizarding schools used portraits as entrances to places. Although any choice Harry made would be to late as they (the marauders) assumed he was confused when he stared up at the portrait and made no movement."It's the entrance to the common room," Remus explained."Yeah, you've just gotta know the password so don't forget!" Peter added cheerfully and Harry sent him a weak smile."And the password is 'Gillyweed'." James told this not only to him but the fat lady as well. Quickly, she swung open and the boys pulled him in in a not so gentle fashion.His chest warmed at the sight of its familiarity, a feeling of homely protection washed over him and he took the desired step forward to take it in. The fires burned, and the couches and armchairs still sat in the same spot, little knickknacks were plotted spontaneously around the room. Harry sent a truly happy smile to the boys, and they grinned back at him."That's not the best part Smith, come look." James dragged him to the window, one he'd much ignored in his own time. His father pointed out the outskirts of the forbidden forest, and Hagrid's Hut."Hagrid?" Harry asked disbelievingly. A thrill passed through him, here someone who knew him - well not exactly. He could still be his friend though, just like in his time. Greet him, have tea, chat about anything. He held a hidden smile."Yeah, he's like massive. Probably a half-giant." James eyes flickered mischievously. "We got a good prank on him in fourth year, had him think his three headed dog had turned into a bucket of maggots. You should have seen him Smith, he rampaged crazy. Man was in tears. It was bloody hilarious," James laughed."Isn't that a little mean?" Harry asked softly, watching as the lights at Hagrid's hut went out."Of course not, it's funny!" James persuaded, shaking his head at Harry. "Come on, let's show you the dorm." He grabbed Harry's arm and led him up the stairs to their dorm. Harry didn't argue, the others followed them quickly up the stairs. He looked around the room and noticed his trunk at the end of his bed, Hedwig must've been sent up to the other owls. He walked over and picked his trunk up and noticed the initials engraved in it 'H.J.P' before the others could come and see he flicked his wand ant altered it - now reading 'H.J.S'.Sirius sneaked up behind him and snatched his trunk from him, throwing it to James who tried to open it. Harry watched them confused as they tried to pry it item. "I - um locked it?" Harry said numbly as they stared up at him cheekily. "-with wards."Shaking his head, Remus pulled the trunk from the two marauders and gave it back to Harry. He nodded his thanks and began to unpack his trunk, the marauders crowding around him to see if they could see anything.Harry quickly stashed some of his more secret stuff in the bedside table that he had before the marauders could see, some of those things being the marauders map, and his photo album."What's this?" Sirius grabbed a framed photo that Harry hadn't noticed when skimming his belongings. Instantly, Harry ripped the object from his hands and covered Sirius' face with his hand before he could look."Nothing!" Harry blurted out, stuffing the photo into the draw and adding more silent wards although Remus seemed to be paying strong attention to what he cast. Sirius whacked his hand away. "Obviously not. What is it a picture of your girlfriend? Your mummy?" He guessed, Harry paled slightly - it was indeed a picture of his parents, one talent a little after their engagement. "Oh my god, it is isn't it?!" He yelled as Harry looked away, slamming his trunk shut."It's nothing." Harry said defeatedly, wincing as he looked back at Sirius' smug expression. "Liar!" He grinned, and James smirked as well. "You a mummy's boy?" James asked, a superior look on his face as he watched Harry refuse to meet his eye."I'm not.""Oh really?" He sneered, forgetting the rude persona that was taking over him."Please leave it, I don't want to talk about it." Harry said uneasily, and Sirius looked at him concerned."Fine, but we'll know once your mother sends you a letter about how much she misses her little boy," James snickered, running a hand through his messy hair."James." Sirius looked sternly at his friend, an obvious 'you should stop', something that rarely happened. Peter looked worriedly at his friends and Remus stared at Harry watching his every movement."It's fine." Harry muttered, pushing past them to the bathroom. His shoulders were tense and he looked green. When they heard the click of the door, Sirius hit James on the head. That earned a loud objection from the Potter."Great job Prongs, you scared off the new kid!" He scolded, glaring disapprovingly at his best friend.James rubbed his head where he had been hit by Sirius. "Calm down, it was only a joke." James wasn't quite used to being told of by Sirius when it came to teasing a student, they'd done at all the time in the previous years. Now, Sirius looked slightly mad that they'd upset some new boy who'd been put with them."Guy did ask you to stop," Peter remarked, watching as James frown turned from Sirius to him. There was some mumbled anger from James but when they heard Harry turn in the shoulder they to started getting ready for bed. James and Sirius simply wore boxers with the exception of James putting on a singlet with a famous quidditch team on it. Peter hopped into some old grey sweatpants and Remus wore the supplied Gryffondor pyjamas.Minutes passed, and James lay on his bed playing with an old worn snitch he's stolen in fourth year. Peter and Remus chatted quietly about Harry on their bed whilst Sirius leaned against his bed, smirking when he saw the bathroom door begin to open."Done." Harry appeared from the bathroom dressed in full flannelette pyjamas. Sirius stared at him a little longer than he was meant to, his hair was all wet and was sticking up in random directions, his glasses were in his hand and he looked so at peace as if nothing had happened minutes before.Harry noticed Sirius staring, he waved awkwardly and Sirius looked up at him finally, smirking slightly. If only he could get a better look. "That's cute," Sirius said, noting the sleek build he had as Harry tilted his head confused."What's cute?" He asked, looking oblivious at Sirius, as all the boys shared the same look."Other than that-" he gestured towards his tilted head that resembled that of a puppy. "The fact you're actually wearing pyjamas," he explained and Harry looked down at the fuzzy pyjamas wondering what was wrong with them.Harry looked up again, and finally noticed how close to naked Sirius was. He went red, although he'd lived with other boys in his dorm at Hogwarts they'd always worn something decent for the many times that Hermione would barge in without warning."Sorry, but I'm not the only one," Harry mumbled pointing to Remus as he also wore pyjamas although not as heavy as Harry's. "Besides, it was cold when I got out of the shower."Sirius couldn't help but gush slightly at how adorable he sounded, he wouldn't mind adding him to his list of people to snog and/or possibly shag. He was indeed Sirius Black, bachelor of Hogwarts.He shrugged and watched as Harry collapsed into his bed, drawing the curtains around him. And silently he swore that he heard the boy cast a silenco around himself. Curious and curiouser.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Harry awoke in cold sweat, his breathing fast and panicked. His hands held his chest as he tried to calm himself. The dream was still so vivid, and in all honesty he wasn't sure why his mind had picked it in his sleep. Guilt felt like the reasonable answer as all he wanted to do was apologise. Instead of the usuals, he dreamt instead of when he'd first encountered Lupin's corpse. Sullen eyes, and mouth hanging open. A man who'd been a mentor, a man who'd known his parents. Dead.Ripping himself from his new bed he took in the sight of the room, all the curtains of the other beds were drawn and looking out the window he could see the pink that painted against the contrast of the dark sky. Sighing he entered the bathroom. Leaving his pajamas, he entered the shower to ease his daunting thoughts that plagued his mind.No one was dead yet. Lupin was safe and he would be for quite some time. It would take time to get used to this thought as all that was on his mind was the memories of anguish and loss. An overbearing sense of angst taking over him and he worshipped the day where he fixed this, where his past just becomes an old nightmare of his teen years.When he was done and was dressed in the days uniform he made his way back to his bed. He didn't lye down, simply own sat and allowed his eyes to wonder. Strings of sunlight flittered into the room, enlightening it's dark atmosphere.Everything felt so wrong. Harry couldn't even tell what he was meant to think, was he supposed to think of his father as his father, or simply as James Potter - the git who made fun of his future son without realizing. Grumbling he reached into the draw, charmed for only his access, and grasped the photo of his parents. He looked at it, the light of the rising sun only covered part of the picture. Their faces. His mother's hair was a vibrant red that contrasted delightfully with her dazzling green eyes that he was very proud to have inherited. Her smile was so large that it looked as if her jaw would ache afterwards, her hands were intertwined with his father's - James. Harry watched with a small smile as the photo repeated the same action of his father spinning her. Their faces overjoyed, and Harry could only see the side of his father's face but he was smiling too, a very genuine smile."What are you doing so early?"Harry turned to see the groggy Remus Lupin making his way over to him. He swallowed his fear away when he thought back to his dream. Harry didn't respond, just looked longingly at the photo. He'd wished more than anything else in the world to meet his parents, now he had the chance - but now it just felt wrong. Wrong wasn't a good way to describe it, what he'd mean was it didn't feel right. He felt like everything he'd hated in others, he was keeping secrets and information from others, he'd despised this action from others (Dumbledore mainly)."James guessed it was you mother, right?" He asked, sitting down on Harry's bed.Harry flipped it over, showing only the back of the frame so that Remus wouldn't see his parents. He doubted that he would be able to link things together but still it felt necessary. "My mother and father," he corrected, thinking back to James teasing. He'd guessed his mother but hadn't known that he to (as his father) had been in the picture as well."Oh. Do you plan on writing to them, I'll show you the Owlry later. There's the school owls, or James' owl - if you wanted to ask him for his," Remus said lightly, his voice close to that of his professor persona."I have my own owl," Harry mumbled slowly, looking up to meet Remus' eyes. "But I won't be writing them."An awkward pause took place.Remus nodded his head in understanding. Sirius had never wanted to talk much when it came to his family, now of course he would rant about them, but when they'd first met he'd hated to confide in others. It tended to blow his ego. "I'm not sure why you had to come to Hogwarts, but I'm sure that everything would be alright." Remus watched as Harry shook his head an ironic looking smile crossing his face before disappearing."I know you're only trying to help," he observed, "but frankly there isn't much you can do. I don't plan in confiding in anyone because I don't think there is much to confide about." He watched as Remus tried to suppress his curiosity and exchange it for concern or pity or something that would not offend Harry. Harry took a deep breath, he felt his shoulders drop, not feeling so tense anymore. "I'm sorry, I've been a bit rude. I was just upset because-" before Remus could have an answer about Harry's family life, Sirius Launched from out of his bed."Rise and shine MotherFuckers!" He shouted as he promptly fell onto the floor, wincing as he held his nose for protection. Harry looked concerned as Sirius sat back up, reassuring everyone with a loud 'I'm okay'."Bloody hell Sirius, you could just get out of bed like a normal person," Remus hissed, scowling playfully as Sirius pretended to brush dirt off his pants."And risk not impressing Harry over here? No thanks," he argued, throwing a sly wink at Harry. "Besides Rem, you know I'm anything but normal.""Yeah, you're fucking stupid." Remus kicked him from Harry's bed as Sirius continued to pout. "Besides Smith looks very unimpressed.""Don't bring me into this!" He cried as he grabbed his school bag that lay next to his trunk. "I'll um- head to breakfast.""Don't think you can get away that easy Smith!" Sirius grinned smugly, grabbing Harry's satchel and throwing it over his shoulder. "Breakfast doesn't start for another hour. So you, can stay here and be impressed by me," he instructed much to the complaints of both Harry and Remus.Harry frowned, and looked from Remus to Sirius. He felt awkward and shy and felt the impeccable feeling that he was going to give something away if he stayed to talk to them. "Well, um, if we can't go to breakfast- could we maybe go see my owl? Please?" He asked sweetly, looking at them wide eyed. Going to see Hedwig would be great, his first real friend.He'd had only one friend before Hogwarts, although not a person, she was a great listener. An owl, his owl. A gift from the kind half-giant Hagrid. She had acted so friendly and at first it had confused him to no ends on to how an owl could be so friendly. "You've got an owl?" Sirius looked at him bewildered, although they were popular owls could often be quite expensive. "I wouldn't mind seeing him, just let me change." And he stripped in a second. In front of both boys as Harry went bright red, only with Ron had he actually changed. Looking away, he quickly placed his parents photo away in his draw. He didn't notice that Remus got a quick glance."Your mum had got red hair?" He said blatantly, watching Harry whip around to face him. "Sorry."He paused before answering, "yeah, she's got red hair... I look much more like my father though." He glanced timidly at Remus as he wondered if he would pick up any signs although it was highly unlikely."Obviously." Harry smiled softly."I'm done guys! Let's go see Harry's little bird." He winked and Harry couldn't help but do a face palm on the terrible joke. "Aye! I'm funny," He snapped when he saw his reaction.Sniggering they left their room but not before Sirius threw himself on top of James when he wanted to tell him where they were going. It ended with Sirius landing on his face again. ___________________________________ Remus made a point of leading him to the Owlry, repeating the corridors and turns to take in hopes to help him remember. It was quite tiring for Harry honestly, having to act like he was clueless when it came to finding his way around the castle. It was much easier to nod and just repeat anything the shaggy looking boy said. It was strange seeing Remus look so carefree, he grinned at him and occasionally he would see his distrust disappear for mere moments when he spoke."Boring ain't It?" Sirius whispered in his ear when Remus had his back turned to them.Harry shook his head, turning to grin his head. "He's so happy, isn't it lovely?" He responded serenely. Looking back at Remus with something that could rival a mother's pride. Sirius sniffed with fake disappointment but instead ended up having to hide a fascinated look from the time traveler. Sirius let Harry take a few steps in front so that he could be left to ponder behind him. Although he'd named the boy 'snoggable' he couldn't help but find his normal self tint pink from his over excessive amount of cuteness. Like honestly, who admires a boring person because they're 'passionate'!Still... Hanging out with him was quite enjoyable, plus he got a kick out of making him blush. Not even girls went as red as he did, well that may have been because they were more likely to hex his balls off.Sirius couldn't help but want to learn more about the newbie, he seemed very secretive about his stuff which of course had only tempted Sirius more into wanting to see the stuff for himself. He hated to admit it but he couldn't help but suspect that his mother may not even be alive, from the way he treated James snide comments and handled the photo with such delicacy, something was just not right about the Mrs Smith. Sirius had suspected that Remus had caught on to, when he'd woken up he'd heard how Remus was treating the topic of Harry's parents - he'd spoken in a voice that had only been used when regarding Sirius' own family."We're here!" Remus shouted enthusiastically, throwing his arms out and looking excitedly at Harry."And all we had to do was take a left," he smiled.The boys quickly followed Harry around as he walked through the circular room, looking for his owl."Hedwig! I'm here." within moments of Harry speaking, a beautiful - majestic even, owl came flapping down until it landed on Harry's should, nuzzling against him.Sirius gaped, the owl was quite tall and sleek and held an elegant aura, if that was even possible for an owl Sirius wondered. It was snowy white with a few feathers at the end of her tail being black and they almost appeared to look like little diamonds as well. He watched as she hooted happily, softly rubbing the top of her head against Harry and he let out a small giggle. Fucking cute. Harry showed the bird off to Remus first, he patted her kindly and she seemed to have earned her favour as she made no signs of annoyance.When Remus was finished Harry turned to him, giving him a pleasant smile as he persuaded his owl to move further down his arm. Harry let out a small wince as the owl's talons digged into his skin but he made no move in telling his pet off.
"Pat her Sirius, she won't bite. Promise." His words were soft and kind and Sirius would feel guilty if he didn't give in. Scratching the top of the owls head Sirius couldn't help but think about the owl he'd once own.His owl had been fatter, black of course, and had always had a nasty look. Although Sirius had loved that owl - it never seemed to have loved him back - but he loved it. Although the relationship didn't do well when his owl had always had to deliver Sirius his mothers howlers, a cruel message that would scream at him at how much of a disappointment he was. He'd passed away two summers ago either way."Hello there - Ugh, what did you say his name was?" Sirius avoided a peck as the pretty white owl seemed to have understood is words and taken offence to them.Harry smiled up at him, but he laughed a little too. "Her name is Hedwig," he answered, Hedwig made a noise of approval and Sirius could hear a snicker escape Remus in the background.They played with Hedwig for some long minutes. When they weren't patting her she was cuddling up against Harry, her pecks bringing large smiles to the new kid's face.Although as quick as their fun had started it had ended, James and Peter appeared at the top of the stairs. The boy with glasses tapping his foot impatiently. "Padfoot, Moony, time for breakfast." He scowled at them, his look showing how he didn't plan on waiting around."Oh, hi James. Have you seen Harry's owl - it's so cool!" Sirius asked his best friend, excitement drizzling through his voice.
James eyed the owl, keeping a straight face as he calculated his next response. "It's fine I suppose, obviously pedigree compared to the other owls," he remarked. Harry grinned, it was nice hearing words that could be considered a compliment from his father.Sirius and Remus began to follow the arrivals - down to breakfast Harry guessed. Not wasting any time, he kissed the top of Hedwig's head and followed them down
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Smiling in a friendly manor, Harry watched in contempt as James made obnoxious conversation with Sirius that was all too funny to ignore and gave Harry an intriguing perspective of their relationship. Whatever it was that they were talking about must have been some futile attempt at impressive boasting – although it was noticeably obvious that not a single word that they spoke was true. “-And then I had the giant begging me to let it live. And I tell you Sirius, never had I seen something so heartbreaking, so, out of the kindness of my heart I said – ‘Leave and never hurt this poor dragon again as it is innocent’ and leave he did. I had to care for that dragon you know, had to wipe away its tears and then it became it gave me a lift back to Potter Manor.” Sirius made good show of clapping his hands and presenting James with a fountain of compliments and cheers that would make any sad man smile.Harry snorted loudly and James shot him a look that seemed to send the dainty message of ‘I bet you couldn’t prove me wrong’. Harry grinned civilly, shaking his head slightly. “Dragons can’t be domesticated, it’s a well-known fact. Charlie used to remind me all the time, he worked with them up in Romania,” he clarified and Remus shot him a small smirk as James seemed to shut up from his horrible stories. Although it had gotten James to shut up it had little to no effect on Sirius and Peter, and Harry got overloaded with a sudden upheaval of questions. “You know a guy who works with dragons?”“Does he ever fly them?”“How many has he seen?”“Did that Charlie guy ever fight one? Like one-on-one?”-And so many more, a chuckle from Remus grabbed his attention and Harry looked pleadingly at him but the werewolf refused to but in and save his regretful self. It had been some long dutiful minutes before both Peter and Sirius seemed mildly satisfied with their given answers, had the word dragon been breathed they would have called themselves self-proclaimed experts.Charlie. Charlie had been a cool bloke, and Harry had found himself grateful to have met a guy so cool, it felt like there had just been no other way to describe the wizard. Charlie was the second eldest of the Weasley gang,
and had helped in so many ways, from taking Hagrid's dragon to fighting in the final battle - he was pretty damn cool.“Oy Smith! Smith to reality.” James was snapping his fingers at him annoyed, and Harry felt his sight twist and morph back into focus. “Oh good, mummy’s boy is back.” Sirius wacked James on the head.
“It’s fine, don’t worry about it,” Harry pleaded quietly to Sirius, watching as the Black relaxed his glare at his friend. “I’m sorry about before, zoned out.”
“Yeah, no kidding,” Peter sniggered, cutting his breakfast up into smaller pieces. Harry felt a forced smile come onto his face, there was no enjoyment when near Peter, not at all.James made an apologetic smile yet it was obvious his heart wasn’t in it, Harry doubted he had the energy to deal with an upcoming argument this early in the morning. “So, J- Potter, anything you would recommend here?” Harry made sure to add a gesture towards the actual school.
The hazel-eyed Potter locked eyes with him but there was a smile that spread across his face, showing off a perfect set of teeth. “I was wondering when we could talk about something interesting,” he beamed, Remus’ head hit the table in defeat. “I happen to be the captain of the most interesting thing at Hogwarts.”
In a moment of pride, James smugly showed off his badge. “Captain of the Gryffondor quidditch team,” James expressed to Harry with so much ego that it appeared as if he was high on it. But Harry didn’t care, eagerly he inspected the badge that James held with him so highly, and gave an admiring look to James.“That’s brilliant!” Harry exclaimed, James looked at him excitedly.
“It is, isn’t it?” he grinned, making show of running his hands through his hair all to conceitedly. “I was captain last year too, never lost a single match.”“You can stop ‘ye boasting now Prongs.” Sirius elbowed James and looked intriguingly at Harry, “do you play?” he queried, ignoring James’ pout from loss of attention.
“Oh yes, I played seeker. I was captain of my team last year – although I always felt a slight nervousness about it,” he smiled, his eyes lighting up at the prospect of quidditch and it didn’t go unnoticed by Sirius.“Well,” James brashly interrupted, ignorant to his sudden rudeness. “We’ve already had quidditch trials and the spots taken.” The marauders all raised an eyebrow at James and gave him one of the biggest you’ve-got-to-be-kidding-me looks.
“We all know that McKinnon can’t fly for shit,” Sirius sighed exasperated, shaking his head in disappointment.James grumbled curses under his breath and hit a pea at Sirius, “it’s not like the rest of the team isn’t great.”
“You mean me being great,” Sirius corrected slyly, at Harry’s confused look he added “I’m beater.” He sent Harry a wink and it ended with him spluttering like a maniac. “Calm down there, I didn’t need to know you could choke until tonight.” Harry screeched in anguish.Peter laughed jovially at Harry, sending him bright smile that when met with Harry looked away – acting although it had never happened.It was in a sudden interruption that McGonagall appeared, she was holding a folded piece of paper tightly and sending the boys a stern look. “Smith,” she seemed to recite, “I have you’re timetable and if anything should be changed please see to it that you inform at the day’s end.” Before any chat could be made she promptly handed the paper over, sending Sirius and James a firm look. “You best be heading to class now.” When the professor was out of earshot, Sirius snatched the paper out of Harry’s grip. “Wicked! You’ve got potions with me and James first, Rem here has it after lunch – lucky bastard.” Harry offered a timorous smile as the marauders drew him up from the table and began dragging him to their first class. Harry waited in a nervous patience as the teacher took his slow time assessing each and every quality of the class, he seemed highly absorbed in seeing if Harry would be anything worth evaluating – although so far all he had done was stand and wait to go into the class.What had been a large discontent to the boy-who-lived, was the fact that he knew exactly who this teacher was. Big bellied and all, it was none other than the disgruntling professor Slughorn. His eyes appeared ready to pop out of his head and Harry felt himself despise that look of careless glee that was plastered plainly on his face.Walking into the class, Sirius had his hand wrapped tightly around his wrist, dragging him along to the table he shared with James. The classroom was in the same place as it was in his time, the slimy stinky dungeons – still filled to the brim with cobwebs and Slytherins. It wasn’t until minutes into one of Slughorn’s lecture that Harry noticed the hand still wrapped around his hand, confused he looked at Sirius who was watching Slughorn but had a satisfied grin on his face. When no reaction came, he pried his hand out of Sirius’. The pureblood’s lips twitched downwards.Harry ignored the little blob of guilt that sat grimly in his stomach and instead watched as Slughorn began to write the instructions for a Love Potion Antidote – the thought of the time it was needed for Ron popped into his mind and he couldn’t help but kick the thought out as soon as it entered. “Now students, now that you have the instructions to the potions I expect you to get started and begin brewing,” the professor chuckled loudly, clapping his hands together. “And- oh- yes, now that we have our additional student, Lily can join with him.” He smiled widely, and Harry watched as a pretty girl looked back at him and waved before turning back to her seat.
He faltered, Lily… The face he’d seen he could recognise it anywhere, especially with the photos tucked inside his bedside table. His mother, he was meeting his mother, little fireworks went off inside him. Looking to James and Sirius he was met with a dark look. His father was failing at hiding the angry glare that was sent his way and Harry – not knowing what else to do made his way over to the smiling redhead.“Hello, it’s Smith, right?” she asked kindly, moving her textbooks out of the way for him. Harry nodded his head shyly, at a total loss of what to say. It wasn’t every day that some orphan travels back in time and meets their formerly dead mother.
“Lily Evans,” she introduced, offering her hand. Anxiously, he shook it.She smiled yet again, and despite his blushing state she conversed civilly with him as they began working on the potion. Harry lamely attempted to ignore James’ consistent glaring but it was not an easy job, had there been some misunderstanding, Harry was sure James would come and work it out with him after class. Then he got hit with a stinging hex.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Harry let out a sharp hiss as he pulled himself upright, his hand grazing his back as he felt it begin to swell. Lily, worry pouring out of her, pulled him up with little grace. "Are you okay? I didn't see who did it, oh I'm so sorry - I should've been looking out!" She muttered quickly, her eyes scraping over the class to see who may appear guilty of cursing Harry.Slughorn's brows furrowed and seemed to feebly ignore scolding the hexer, instead he muttered an apology to the class and returned to making strange noises as he waddled over to Harry."You alright my boy? Swelling should settle soon," he babbled watching as Harry forced his eyes open through a pained wince."Professor, shouldn't he go to the hospital wing. Let Madam Pomfrey see?" The red head questioned, ignoring the snickering of the Slytherins whose eyes lingered on Harry.The bloated professor seemed ready to object but a shout from behind had quickly grabbed his attention."I'll take him Sluggy! Besides Evans here, needs to work on her potion more and I~ don't care about mine," Sirius had shouted as he skipped out from behind his desk and hooked arms with the boy who looked so similar to his best friend. His grey eyes danced with enthusiasm and being the mischievous marauder he was, led poor Harry out of the classroom before anyone could object."You'd think he'd take a little effort in class," lily sighed exasperated, strands of red hair falling imperfectly in front of her face."Padfoot? No way," James laughed, a grin would have pulled at his face had his eyes not been narrowed to glare at the slythrins."That was some hex you took," Sirius exclaimed, shortly after he and Harry had exited the potions class, Sirius still had his hand firmly wrapped around Harry's wrist. He didn't seem to notice and tiny fireworks went off inside of Sirius.Harry's eyes held a soft confusion as he looked at Sirius, he was chewing his lip and looked extremely in thought. "But- wasn't it James who hexed me?" The question seemed to hold some sort of offence as Sirius narrowed his gaze and stood looking very pointedly at Harry."Excuse me?" Harry could definitely see something very 'pure bloody' in Sirius' little sneer."I'm really sorry, it's just that-""Just what?" Sirius was visibly upset and his heart sunk at realising how badly his words must have affected his godfather - stupid Harry!"James looked really mad at me all lesson," he quickly explained, waving his hands for added affect. "He was glaring and everything, I thought he had done it- am I wrong?" Anxiously he scratched at his swelled back, an awkward look sitting on his face as he await Sirius' response.A little gleam flickered across Sirius' expression and before Harry knew it, he was being dragged down the corridor again. "Sorry for the confusion mate, James was pissed but he'd never sting 'ya," he chortled lowly, turning to grin at Harry. "I thought you knew, it was the Slytherins, Snape to be more precise- he's always been a little predictable when it comes to Evans." He gave a little laugh for emphasis but Harry couldn't help but wince - as much as he respected the man, he couldn't help but be disgusted with the thought of Snape being anywhere near his beautiful mother."My bad, mind not telling James I thought it was him?" He shrugged nervously.Sirius smirked, "no." ❧ Sirius made a job of basically lying on Harry who was placed firmly in one of the cots whilst Pomfrey had gone to search for a cream to apply to the newbie's wound. "Having fun, Harry?" He chuckled, kicking his feet out of boredom. "I could always find a way to pass the time." Sirius waggled his eyebrows suggestively but was answered with a small shove and a red spluttering Harry."Don't say things like that!" He'd snapped but his beating red face only left him with little snickers from Sirius."Oh? But I didn't say anything, nothing of the sort Smith." He chided, his grey eyes pinned playfully at Harry. "Why, what is it that you think I mean?" Sirius got he responds of Harry burying his face in his hands, complaints being muffled.Sirius had been kicked off the bed instantly when Madam Pomfrey hat return, she'd given him a proper scolding - one that reminded Harry of the way Mrs. Weasley had punished her boys when they'd misbehaved. "I hope you'll forgive him dear, he doesn't have much common sense," she'd said sedately as she applied the cream to his back. Harry's face burned as he watched Sirius check out his shirtless form. ❧ After they'd left the hospital wing, Sirius quickly walked him to Defence Against then Dark Arts. That was when Harry met Professor Kíndynos, a tall upright man with slicked back blond hair. His eyes were a narrowed brown that held a dangerous gaze, although his almost intimidating appearance - Harry had to admit the man looked surprisingly professional and looked as if he actually took the job seriously.The man looked him in the eye and offered him a small smirk."You would be the new student, am I correct?" He asked gently, his chin tilted upwards and Harry struggled a nod of his head. "I hope you aren't a disappointment." Harry shook his head, "no sir."The man grinned, "good."The class seemed simple enough. For the beginning half they'd studied the theory of the patronus, it appeared they had already discussed it in a previous lesson. Leaning towards the end of the lesson the teacher took volunteers to come to the front of the lesson and practice."Evans, up here please." The Professor gestured kindly towards the little platform at the front of the room. The class watched enthusiastically as a large white whisk emerged pleasantly from Lily's wand, the outline of hooves could be seen on the ground. "Best so far," he praised, and it was true. So far out of the seven others that had attempted previously, had all failed at even presenting more than a centimetre of a patronus.Lily looked delighted at the praise. "Tell me miss Evans, what happy memory did you use?""Well- coming to hogwarts of course!" Her smile was magnificent, her happy thought still incorporated into her cheerful expression. As she made her way back the class clapped respectively for her."Way to go flower!" James yelled excitedly from the back, throwing an enthusiastic punch to the air. Lily tried to scowl as she ducked he head but her cheeks were a glowing red and it was really a pity James was to oblivious to notice."Whose next? No one?" The teacher looked around but not many people seemed up to trying - a fear of messing up. "Well I guess I'll have to pick, Mr Black - get up here now!" Harry eyed curiously as Sirius swaggered his way over to the platform, winking at someone that he presumed was sitting behind Harry.Sirius pulled the wand from his back pocket, his eyes narrowed in a way of concentration, he poked his tongue out in anticipation of guessing what might be his happiest memory. He took a deep sigh, tapped his wand against his leg in frustration before he exclaimed a loud 'Expecto Patronum', the large white smoke erupted from his wand - the head of a dog poked its way through the essence with a tail wagging not to far behind. Professor Kíndynos clapped Sirius on the back, a proud teacher if there ever was. "Memory?""Sitting with James on Christmas," he smirked, as James sent him a thumbs up. Harry couldn't help but smile softly - their friendship reminding him of his with Ron's."I'll go next, Professor!" James little shout brought the class back to reality as he shared a high five with his best friend before trading spots with him."Expecto Patronum!" A large amount of white whisk shot out of his wand and although the class clapped with his better-than-others performance he looked unsatisfied. "Let me try again professor! Just one more time," he said quickly, looking determined as the evidence of the spell faded away.When the teacher nodded his approval James hurriedly got back into position. His face scrunched up into focus but Harry say a slight romanticised look drift onto his face when he opened his eyes. Sirius elbowed him as he appeared by his side, "he's thinking about Lily," he confided, Harry felt a moment of confusion wash over him. "Trust me.""Expecto Patronum!" He yelled, large antlers erupted from his wand and they paraded around the room followed in a large amount of white smoke - it wasn't corporeal just as all the others hadn't been. Harry watched as more and more students got dragged up, willing or not it didn't seem to matter. Slowly he pulled himself to the back of the classroom, wishing that the teacher didn't bother with him, instead trying to focus on the Ravenclaw that had only a mist appear in front of her.It was a little disappointing, he'd forgotten that the spell was hard. Well of course it was, he'd done it many times but recently had had just began to feel as simple as a repairo. He heard the teacher's voice climb over the rest of the chattering students, "Smith, come give it a try!"
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Harry watched as more and more students got dragged up, willing or not it didn't seem to matter. Slowly he pulled himself to the back of the classroom, wishing that the teacher didn't bother with him, instead trying to focus on the Ravenclaw that had only a mist appear in front of her.It was a little disappointing, he'd forgotten that the spell was hard. Well of course it was, he'd done it many times but recently it had just began to feel as simple as a repairo.He heard the teacher's voice climb over the rest of the chattering students, "Smith, come give it a try!" Harry felt the blood drain from his face. “E- excuse me?” His eyes caught James and Sirius who gestured encouragingly for him to go up. The teacher made no movement, only sparing a grin. He fought back a groan as he headed up, one foot in front of the other, one breath after another. Feeling for his wand he hesitated, was it even safe for him to do this? When Prongs appeared would anybody recognise him, Sirius seemed to be watching him keenly and Harry could only give him a timid smile as he thought this through. Another part of him, a more selfish and powerful part wanted to display Prongs proudly to everyone, let them see the spelled animagus that was his father - that part of him won.“Think of your happiest memory, and make it real.” The teacher watched him firmly as if he could feel the spell already bubbling up inside of him.Harry focused his attention on a memory, forcing it to be stronger. Him, Ron, Hermione, the Weasleys and a very perfect Christmas. He cast the spell... nothing happened. He felt himself breath a little ‘what’, a couple chuckles were thrown in the room, silenced by the teacher’s glare.“Try again, pick a better memory,” Professor Kíndynos enforced watching Harry intrusively. “And don’t disappoint.”With a solemn nod of his head, Harry looked forward, raking his head for a drop of a happy thought. None came to mind, a sudden tightness in his throat started and he could feel the sudden nervousness of his inability to grasp a happy thought. A soft hand touched his shoulder, looking back he came face to face with Lily, her eyes looking fiercely at Harry, ‘it’s fine, you’re fine’ she mouthed to him before dropping the ha d and taking a step back, shooting Harry an awkward smile, almost unsure of herself. That’s right, he couldn’t help but think, his mother was here - his father was her, so was Sirius and Remus! He returned the smile, one large and bold.‘I’ve got a family now,’ he told himself. ‘And I’ll make sure they’re around for longer than they should be!’ He held onto that hope like it was a lifeline, he wanted this family to stay, he wanted to let it grown until literal flowers bloomed in his chest. He waved his wand and yelled a strong “Expecto Patrotum!” He winced as he saw the heavily detailed stag come racing out of his wand, turning and facing him expectantly - slowly it shifted back into the air.Wincing, he looked back to the class. A dead silence. Slowly a clap started and before he could wave it away the whole class had started clapping, cheering him on. A small laughter bubbled inside of him for a second and he tightened his shoulder as he stepped back down amongst the crowd, hiding his shock as Lily embraced him tightly in a hug as she sang him praises.“What memory did you use? Please tell the class.” The cheering ended and Harry’s eyes widened, the teacher only looked expectant.“It’s rather personal, sir.” His emerald eyes met the teacher’s brown, the other made no move to take back his order and Harry felt the familiar sense of dread. Looking to Sirius he only saw the peek of curiosity. Shrugging, he gave in. “I thought about my family.” Looking to the ground he shuffled back a few steps, the room was still silent, was he meant to elaborate on that? “It wasn’t really a memory of them, just the thought of having them around me... alive.” The eerie silence was broken by someone’s gasp and Lily held her hand on his shoulder for good grace.“Meadowes, your turn.” Sirius linked arms with Harry as they made their way to lunch, there was tense air in the group and Harry felt the guilt that he’d somehow caused it. His best guess being the mention of his happy ‘thought’ in Defence Against the Dark Arts. He watched submissively as James tensed and relaxed constantly, sometimes turning to look at Harry with a thoughtful gaze, Sirius made no such movement as he only walked Harry through the halls - still believing him to be the new student that he said he was.“J- Potter,” saying his own last name felt strange, yet not as strange as calling James anything other than Dad. James gaze flicked back to him, a sudden tightness to his shoulders. “Did I say something wrong before?” Harry quizzed, making sure to keep his voice soft and not something demanding. James stern gaze flickered back to him, and the echoes his shoes made halted. His future father shifted his hands in his pocked awkwardly and he appeared to be having an internal battle whether snarling was acceptable or not.“Just- stay away from Evans,” he hissed lowly, looking forward to try and hide his remorseful expression at his own sudden rudeness.“What- why?!” Harry had no malicious intent but his brash curiosity wanted to know what reason could possibly stop him from talking to his mothers - well it wasn’t like they really knew about that.“Isn’t it obvious? You can’t go frolicking with the girl I want,” James snapped, readjusting his glasses as the slipped down the bridge of his nose. “What are you talking about?” Harry felt disgusted by the mere proposition that he’d wished to do anything ‘else’ with his mother. “I don’t even like her like that, I just wanted to be her friend.”“Well, I’m sorry, you’re new so no. You don’t get to hang out with her.”Harry felt himself snap, had he been smarter he would of stopped and thought this through, but he wasn’t smarted and say something quite stupid - he did.“You’re being ridiculous! I’m not even into girls!” He clamped a hand over his mouth automatically. A sudden green tinge coming over him, James stopped - gaping. He stumbled backwards, removing himself from the stiff Sirius Black. Suddenly anxious, he pushed himself against a wall for stability. What did they even think of homosexuality in the seventies? We’re wizards anymore accepting than muggles? He looked to the still gaping James, he could feel the sudden terror that he may not accept him - his own father might not accept him.Sirius was the first one to act, seeing the horrified look in Harry’s face. He swept the time traveller into a warm hug, uttering safe words into the trembling teens hair “it’s fine.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“You’re being ridiculous! I’m not even into girls!” He clamped a hand over his mouth automatically. A sudden green tinge coming over him, James stopped - gaping. He stumbled backwards, removing himself from the stiff Sirius Black. Suddenly anxious, he pushed himself against a wall for stability. What did they even think of homosexuality in the seventies? We’re wizards anymore accepting than muggles? He looked to the still gaping James, he could feel the sudden terror that he may not accept him - his own father might not accept him.Sirius was the first one to act, seeing the horrified look in Harry’s face. He swept the time traveller into a warm hug, uttering safe words into the trembling teens hair “it’s fine.”Harry ignored the familiar feel of disappointment when Sirius finally took a step back, that fingers that had brushed through his hair softly now gone too. His eyes were stuck on his feet despite the comforting words that Sirius offered continuously, his little ‘don’t worry about it,’ and ‘it’s fine, I promise,’ doing nothing the quell the fear that bundled up in his stomach, yet he was grateful for his presence nonetheless.James guiltily fiddled with his fingers as he walked in front - being the leader that would lead them to lunch, and better off a few steps away from the awkward mess that was Harry (unbeknownst to him) Potter - his future son.They took their seats, with a seldom silence. James diving into the food, a coping mechanism that allowed him to avoid the topic that he so worried he’d fuck up in (words of comfort sounded like insults if it came from him, okay! Peter can back this). Sirius tapped his finger inconsistently as he wobbled on thinking up how many different ways he could defuse the situation without coming off with the wrong intentions. Firstly, he could straight up say that he was bisexual (although he leaned towards the men if given the offer), yet this could come of to brash and may seem like he was trying to insinuate something that may just turn Harry back into somebody meek and blushing. Secondly, he could say he didn’t care although he doubted that would be any different with the results of his previous tries of comfort. Thirdly- oh wait, Remus and Peter were here. Sirius let out a little sigh of relief, they could fix this, his Remmy was a clever cookie.“Moony! Wormy!” Sirius put on fake smile #3 - a guarantee to make anyone with the faintest attraction to men swoon, his voice cracked with the failed need to hide his panic. He preached Harry wasn’t getting the right idea. Remus already had an eyebrow raised whilst Peter had a gaze that was shifting from Harry’s look of unmistakable glum to James’ painstakingly obvious guilt-ridden expression. “Mind explaining to Harry here that nobody gives two shits about his sexuality,” Sirius supplied, pretending to be at total ease as he scooped food onto his plate - changing the irrational tapping of his fingers over to his feet instead. He watched with muted interest as Harry’s head shot up to gape at him, most likely screaming internally about ‘why would you say that?’ He chuckled softly, casting a look at the subtly surprised Remus Lupin who seemed to have his mind working a mile a minute. “You finally decided to shag Sirius?” He asked cautiously. Sirius could easily see the common look of ‘are you shitting me?’ and ‘already scared off the new kid, fucking shame knowing that he wasn’t the only normal one in our dorm room!’ James’ guilt may be beginning to rub onto him. “What? No!” Harry cried, face a beet-red, “I- just- you really don’t care?” They’re was that look of hope in his eyes that Sirius could already att to his bag of adoration for the boy. Remus shrugged, taking a seat and grabbing some of the food of off James’ plate. “I don’t think I could care, not after Sirius has had every queer in his bed - but then again, Sirius has basically had every single student in his bed,” he explained monotonously, biting into the chicken whilst Sirius smirked at what he considered an accomplishment.“Sirius- You’re?” “Bisexual. I thought I’d made that obvious?” A sudden look of realisation hit Harry’s face, Sirius internally cringed at the idea that all his flirtatious action may have been perceived differently until now. Could you really blame him for growing such a quick attachment to this seemingly oblivious boy.The boy smiled dumbly, “I just thought- yeah I didn’t really know what was happening.” Forgive and forget was what Sirius reminded himself, it was seemingly obvious that Harry had tried to brush off any previous flirts but he most likely couldn’t find any excuse to ignore the now. He had a series of internal cheering going on.“Now mind telling us what boyfriends you’ve had previously?” Peter asked mischievously, stretching his arms out behind his back as he wiggled into a more comfortable seating position at the table. The marauders all watched with great endearment as Harry went an awkward shade of red followed by muffled choking noises. “Only one,” he finally admitted, his voice soft and shy but a strange look in his eye - a look that Sirius couldn’t decipher was meant to be one of positivity or not.“Well?” A voice urged, he was much to interested in listening to Harry then to figure out which marauder spoke, he’ll he wouldn’t be surprised if he was the one who spoke himself.“He was two years above me, but he was nice and- well, what am I meant to say?” Harry looked conflicted, he hadn’t spoken much about himself and Sirius was beginning to wonder if it was because he was a reserved person or if he too had a rough past. “Something interesting,” James piped in, finally joining the conversation. “How’d you start dating him?” Harry let out a low chuckle, a noice so charming as he fiddled with his glasses yet again. “I got really jealous of a girl who he’d been flirting with and when I’d found him alone I confronted him, not even thinking, I asked him to the ball the school was holding.”“How romantic,” Remus quipped dryly, his eyes flickering ever so often to the enchant ceiling that spurted the pretty scenery, reminiscent to the one outside.“He didn’t say yes.” Remus peeked an eyebrow, but they all shared that little thill of excitement as the waited impatiently for an ending to the story.“He told me he’d already agreed to go with the girl I’d been jealous of, but he admitted he rather go on a date with me afterwards, so we did.”“How long did you date for? Was he any good at snogging?” The words poured like lightning fire from Sirius’ mouth.“Close to six months? Ah- yes, but let’s talk about something else. Remus why do you have a separate for Defence Against the Dark Arts?” Harry seemed determined to change the subject, an almost eerie spark in his eye that dimmed when he was sure that no follow up questions would be asked concerning this ex of his.Remus she’d no light on what he though about the change but answer in a way that was humble enough to be known that it came from their fellow Remus Lupin. “Headmaster Dumbledore thought I should extend my abilities in the subject because it was my most promising.”“Or maybe because you were the best in the school, and last year you were able to make a strong patronus. A spell they’ve only started teaching today?” James injected, smirking at his friend. “Give yourself a little ego, impress Smith not bore him.” The chide was playful and friendly, and it was something that Sirius could recognise as James being James. Friendly scolds handed out by the mother hen of the group, his group consisting of only those he’d trust with his lives (Harry was only in this group for obvious reasons).“Do you think you’d want to go into a job with it, maybe even teaching it? I’m sure you’d be good at it,” Harry grinned, his earlier discomfort melting away as he sung his praise to Remus - unaware of the slight tightening of the latter’s shoulders. Remus denied the possibility of him ever getting a job, the main facto being that as as long as he was a werewolf nobody would hire him, and it wasn’t like the marauders could tell Harry the most genuine of the ‘really, don’t mention it’ as it would have to be followed with an explanation that would result in shoving the friend’s secret in a newcomers’ hands.“Ahh, I doubt I’d be any good a teacher,” the werewolf sighed.Harry laughed, the tiniest of smirks reaching his lips. “I really do think you’d make a good teacher, trust me, I can feel it.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Do you think you’d want to go into a job with it, maybe even teaching it? I’m sure you’d be good at it,” Harry grinned, his earlier discomfort melting away as he sung his praise to Remus - unaware of the slight tightening of the latter’s shoulders. Remus denied the possibility of him ever getting a job, the main fact being that as as long as he was a werewolf nobody would hire him, and it wasn’t like the marauders could tell Harry the most genuine of the ‘really, don’t mention it’ as it would have to be followed with an explanation that would result in shoving the friend’s secret in a newcomers’ hands.“Ahh, I doubt I’d be any good a teacher,” the werewolf sighed.Harry laughed, the tiniest of smirks reaching his lips. “I really do think you’d make a good teacher, trust me, I can feel it.” -- Harry rested his head on his pillow, staring at the top of the canopy as too many questions swirled through his head. He was truly trapped in the past and the guilt of his cold goodbye to his friends was finally beginning to sit with him. Ron, a true brother and best friend, he will never see again – and if he ever did it wouldn’t be the one he knew. That ginger boy who had been the family he needed, wasn’t even born, not even in the womb. Ron Weasley was now a whole life away and Harry couldn’t have been crueler in their goodbye. He was such an idiot. Hermione, Ginny, all of them. They had finally come out alive and still Harry pushed them away and he couldn’t apologise this time. Their faces, sad, shocked, disappointed. It felt blurry now. He hoped he wouldn’t forget them. He had pictures of course, but they had no depth, they could remind him of the tone of the skin and the freckles on their face. But no photo could replicate the sounds of their laughs, resay the inside jokes or Hermione’s reprimands. At least he had Hogwarts. The rooms he and Ron had shared were just the same, and the corridors the golden trio had walked were just as long and twisty. Perhaps if you had asked a small ten-year-old Harry, if he would like to travel back in time and meet his family and go to a nice school away from the Dursleys, he would agree. But today Harry wanted to take it all back, the homesickness was tight, and his eyes felt sore as he tried to lock the tears in. His family, his parents, people he never knew can’t quite replace the memories of the people who were always by his side. His mother, Lily Evans, he had barely even spoken to her, but he was enthralled by her kind words and pretty face. He desperately wanted to get to know the woman that his mother was, what were the good things about her and what were the spells she excelled at. Did she detest history of magic just as much as he did? What similarities could he find between the two.James, although a jerk and cut off at times, was his father and Harry would not end his attempts to know him now. James Potter showed loyalty through and through but ignorance just as much. Although Harry remains unsure of their chance of friendship, he has eagerly waited for too long to not give James the chance to truly impress him. The father he never knew but always defended, he was the stars in the sky that Harry always wanted to know.He finally had this chance to know them, to befriend them. It was a true blessing, the life that was so impossibly out of reach was now suddenly in his grasp, but it no longer had the same satisfaction.Thinking back to the Patronus he had formed, his friends – why weren’t they a happy enough memory? He blamed himself. When he though of the friends that he cherished, he felt all the more guilty. Harry left them behind and selfishly it was for his own wants and not those of Dumbledore’s. That was a lie, Harry wasn’t even too confident that his parents would be at school when he arrived, but he wanted to be where they were alive. He had found that road that diverged in the woods, and he took the weirdest fucking one, one with time travel and once-dead parents.He had the sudden urge to bury his head into is pillow, drown himself in its softness and perhaps suffocate. He wiped at face harshly – some dumb attempt to force his tears off his face. Oh. Harry was crying now. Splendid.Grunting, he sat up. Pulling his glasses off his face he rand his hand through his hair subconsciously. This was hard. What did he even want out of life? The path that he had chosen was once that he should not have regretted knowing that he had no opportunity to return home. Home didn’t exist now, time must have been affected by his arrival. Although he cannot quite believe that he has done anything that truly has an impact here, perhaps if he spun a time turner in the opposite direction for long enough, he could go home. A dry laugh fell from his mouth. That was stupid. He couldn’t just do that, or could he? This all felt too much, he needed someone to explain this, he could ask Hermione if she wasn’t decades in the future. There were way too many technicalities for this thing, Dumbledore should have really given him a pamphlet on the basics of time travel and not just a goddamn to-do list.Today had been relentless, doing his classes had exhausted him and now he sat in his bed whilst the other boys had been at the quidditch pitch, Peter and Remus saying that they just planned on watching. Harry, like the sad sack he was, declined their offer to join and had made his way to the common room but he had the feeling that James had seemed relieved that he had declined to join. To think he loved this man so much, this man who would be his father, yet the man was clueless to who he really was. He doesn’t really find himself blaming him, Harry must just this confused boy who ruined the comfortableness of the Gryffindor boys. “I fuck everything up,” Harry mourned, more tears spilling down his cheeks as he felt his shoulders surely start to shake as he cried. If Harry couldn’t even save everyone in his original life, what had made Dumbledore believe he could do it now. Harry finally felt the familiar suffocation of responsibilities and failing relationships weigh him down.He hated this dwelling. This should be so easy, he thought, just say yes and be friendly to the boys offers. But it never did feel that easy. It was so obvious that James had no idea how he felt about him but would not be opposed to Harry leaving just as quickly as he showed up. “I just want…” What did Harry want? Did he want James to like him? Become someone who cared for him and shared secrets with him as they walked through the school. Or was it his old life that he wanted, the one he had so incredibly fucked up just by existing. His boyfriends, parents, and friends had all died because he hadn’t just died earlier on.Is dying what he wanted? He sniffed miserably, a dulled numbness in his chest as he once again brushed his hand through his hair. He couldn’t do this to himself. He never could, giving up still wouldn’t save those he loved. -- The warm and seclusion of the canopy bed left him as Harry pried himself away, standing on wobbly knees and wiping at his face, he stared at the room. As he had thought previously, it was all the same to the one he had shared with Ron. The curtains, the canopy beds, and bedside tables, all the same. A sigh left him, an end to the strange phase of panic he had just endured. Making his way down the stairs, he wandered into the common room of the Gryffindor tower. He fell into one of the armchairs, staring dejectedly into the brick fireplace that danced with a loving fire. Had his godfather’s face not once appeared in this very fireplace? When boredom had overtaken him, he began to count all the cracks in the bricks that were visible from his place in the armchair. He hadn’t thought he had sat there for long when he felt a finger tap his shoulder. “Smith,” a warm voice said. Turning his head quickly he met the kind face of his mother, Lily Evans. Studying her face, he found myself again warmed by her almond green eyes. She truly did have the same eyes as him, but there was this way that she wore them that he didn’t think he ever could, her eyes sat ever so gently on her face – pleasantly twinkling with this vulnerable optimism in them. He craved to know how she was able to present herself as so welcoming.“Yes,” he croaked with he small voice. She had a toothy smile. “I thought you could use a friend,” she grinned. “If you would like one of course.”In that moment, Harry knew that his mother was truly an angel.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Smith,” a warm voice said. Turning his head quickly he met the kind face of his mother, Lily Evans. Studying her face, he found myself again warmed by her almond green eyes. She truly did have the same eyes as him, but there was this way that she wore them that he didn’t think he ever could, her eyes sat ever so gently on her face – pleasantly twinkling with this vulnerable optimism in them. He craved to know how she was able to present herself as so welcoming.“Yes,” he croaked with a small voice.She had a toothy smile. “I thought you could use a friend,” she grinned. “If you would like one of course.”In that moment, Harry knew that his mother was truly an angel.---The tightening of his chest was addictive, a sensational drug his body was crawling with. And as his breath caught in his mouth and his teeth stabbed against his tongue, he looked to his mother.Lily Evans stood in front of him, not a shade, nor the woman in the mirror of erased, but a very much alive redheaded woman. Harry knew this was not his first time meeting the young girl in the past, he had already shared classes and trivial conversations with her but, oh dear, the objects he would curse in order to keep it just like this. Lily Evans, ever so kind and strong willed – smiled brightly at him, a nervous cringe of her eyes as she waited for his response.But Harry felt ever so caught up in the moment, like the room around him could fall away and his body wouldn’t move.Her head fell softly to its side, a questioning tilt.“I would like that,” Harry smiled softly, watching carefully as her green eyes bore into his. “A lot.” He had friends, he had made a family once before – but this was what he had wanted. A mother was what he had always longed for, and in some ways, Mrs. Weasley had helped to fill that space – but she wasn’t Lily Potter nee Evans. In the seconds that took years, her smile broadened to something toothier and more genuine and she took her place in one of the sofas next to him.How she seemed so confident whilst just as much nervous, came as a welcome surprise to Harry, watching as her eyes flickered around with skepticism but yet her expression never once faltered. A person that was so alive, to see that she breathed, and that she moved – she was no longer just a twenty-year-old in a picture.“You skipped dinner, weren’t with Black, Lupin, Pettigrew, and that Potter,” she pried curiously. That was indeed an honest question though when Harry turned it over in his head. He had been at the Hogwarts of this time for mere nights and never once spent time with people other than those boys who he shared sleeping quarters with, and perhaps the head girl would notice if the new kid happened to be missing when attention was almost always being gathered by the marauders.“Wasn’t hungry,” he replied quietly, hands finally softening their killer grip against the armchair. “But you must have skipped it as well.”She shrugged. “I ate too much at lunch I suppose, and Potter really would not be quiet.” Her lips moved to a slight frown. “It was not anything bad, not a surprise really, but annoying just as much,” she uttered thoughtfully, her eyebrows raising momentarily.“Annoying?” Harry questioned.“Oh, I was speaking without thinking,” Lily said, following it with a small breathy laugh as she awkwardly tucked one of her bright auburn strands of hair behind her ear.Silence fell between them again, quiet and only a degree uncomfortable.How Ron would flick him for his idiocy. ‘Harry, your parents are finally here, and you think you have the time to be shy!’ he would cry. Laughing at his best friend’s lack of confidence… but he would be comforting too, Ron wouldn’t have just laughed- Harry knows that.‘Don’t worry mate, you’ll come around – they’re your parents, and they’ll like you no matter what.’ That seemed just as likely as to what his friend might say. That horribly homesick feeling had to be swallowed down again.“I’m sure James- Potter,” Harry started speaking with a funny uncertainty. “Potter must really like you, perhaps he just wants to talk to you.” He met her same green eyes, stilled as he waited with apprehension.“Why should I have to put up with his poor manners, he never seems to listen to me.” She was shaking her head, eyes now shut as she fell deeper into the depths of the lounge. “It’s like my words go in one ear and out the other.”“He must like the attention then,” he spoke slowly. Pleasantly surprised to see her crack one eye open as she made a cheeky expression of exaggerated annoyance.Lily chuckled, “Sounds just like him. Silly Potter can’t not have attention.”Dreadfully, he considered her tone, had that been a pleasant remark at his actions or one entirely sarcastic. “But good intentions.” Lily made no sudden response, instead moving to pry a piece of parchment from her bag – eyes skimming through its heavily detailed notes.“Maybe not,” she breathed. “Still just as annoying though.”Lily moved through all of the parchment, reviewing her notes but pausing to talk to Harry when she found the moment. This felt nice, to have the peace, although Harry could not help but feel overbeared by the struggle to find conversation – the comfort in her presence was there. Silence was infiltrated by the sounds of the Gryffindor students who surely started to enter back into the common room. Very slow at first, a few youngers coming in individually at first, then larger amounts came in, most likely signalling the final end of the dinner supplied by Hogwarts.“Lily flower!” sung by a cheerful voice with a mop of unruly black hair on top of his head.Looking over to the teen girl who had sat with him for the last while he saw as her lips pursed. “There goes our peace,” she sighed.The marauders soon approached them, James Potter extending his arm to Lily Evans. “A beauty if I ever saw one,” the boy wooed. Sirius clapping him on the back as he shook his head with a fond exasperation.“Never going to leave Evans to herself are you mate,” the Black chucked. A small grin inching onto all of their mouths. Lily shook her head as she packed her bag. Lily quickly waved Harry goodnight, nodding her head to the marauders as she moved herself to sit with her own dorm mates. Internally, he thanked her endlessly, for providing him this chance to know her and giving him comfort.“So, Smith,” Sirius started, a confident look on his face tainted by the slimmer of worry that danced in his eyes. “You skipped dinner. I know you didn’t want to join us down on the quidditch pitch…” he seemed to have failed to complete his sentence, he just had a very patient look on his face.“Not hungry?” he offered.“Merlin Smith, if you say so,” Sirius said tiredly, still offering a small cheeky smile.The marauders joined him in sitting in the lounges and armchairs, but it was only mere minutes before Pettigrew shifted himself to the floor as he set up a game of chess and petitioned for Remus to join him. ‘Oh Remus, please, one game,’ he had begged. Soon the other two boys began to divulge in a discussion regarding their own personal game of quidditch. Supposedly, Sirius hadn’t seemed to please with the outcome. ‘Prongs, you surely couldn’t have counted half of that shit!’“Do you play for the Gryffindor team?” Harry interjected, quiet as the boys stopped to look at him. James letting out a small huff, Harry would just pretend didn’t happen.Sirius ducked his head so he could scratch it. “Yes, beater actually – but James over here gives me hell for it,” he explained, jabbing his thumb at his best friend. “Oi! I give you hell for joining the team so late, not because of your position.”“Still giving me shit,” Sirius laughed, flicking at James’ head as he stood up.“Really guys,” Peter smiled. Looking up from his game to see the boys getting ready to bicker even louder. Typically, Harry’s stomach twisted grossly, as if ‘ew’ could become a physical sensation. He pitied his inability to look straight at Peter Pettigrew and not wish to enact violence. With one final childish poke of the tongue from Sirius as he fell back into his seat, they moved to a calming peace – mimicking the one that he had shared with his mother.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
A few days passed and Harry felt himself stretched out against the grass by the lake, eyes squinted as he glared at the sun who had sent him rays of light that burnt his pale skin. Fingers raking against the dirt, he frowned as something interrupted his staring match with the sun.“Plan on blinding yourself any further there?” Sirius’ voice was warm with humor, and the taller boy quickly moved to take a seat by the secret Potter. Harry greeted him with a tired smile, pushing his glasses up his nose as he pulled himself up from where he lay.“Good to see you too, Black,” Harry hummed, as he began to slowly settle, he had come to appreciate the friendship that Sirius Black had offered him. They settled into a quiet conversation, grieving the homework assigned, and despairing the exams to come. As the wind had smelled softly sweet and fresh, and the warm weather had done much to welcome them to a spot of comfort - the two boys found it easy to get lost in the calm company. The other’s grey eyes always seemed to be trapped on him, breathing him in almost, as if he would fade from existence if he were to look away.“You look like a dope,” Harry had laughed, playfully elbowing Sirius Black and grinning at the affronted look on his face. His smile slipped though, the urge to settle into comfortable neutrality too much of an urge to ignore.The pureblood cursed him off but his eyes still could not match the harsh words. So again, it was comfortable conversation. “Who was the boyfriend again?” he asked, eyes tearing away as he pulled at the grass.His head thrummed with sudden quietness, and although he masked his facial features, he could not ignore the ache in his chest. “Pardon,” he almost whispered, praying that when Sirius repeated himself, he will have known that he had just misheard.“The boyfriend, the one you secretly dated or something,” Sirius grumbled, pulling tightly at a flower until it was pulled out of the earth followed by its roots.“Cedric,” Harry breathed, the name falling lovingly from his lips, gentle as if not to insult it and quiet as if to preserve. “What do you want to know?”The other took on a contemplative look, before quickly spinning to meet his gaze. “Dunno, everything - why’d the two of you split?”Split - break up, Harry could have laughed at the pathetic question. Pettigrew offed him, killed him like he was worth as much as gum under a shoe. But looking into the curious eyes of Sirius, he knew he could never say the truth out loud. The Hufflepuff boy who had captured his heart, had kissed him quickly and deeply in every hidden corner of Hogwarts. And he was killed by the best friend of the man in front of him.“Just didn’t work out,” he said, voice raspy all the quite suddenly and this wasn’t hidden from Sirius who did nothing but raise one thin brow.“He just had better things to do, I guess, needed to focus on his studies.” Nausea overcame him, his body swayed like that of the hull of a ship.“Harry,” Sirius paused, wiping his dirtied fingers against his jeans. “I didn’t mean to push, but you don’t sound particularly honest.” He placed a comforting hand on the boy’s shoulder, and Harry frowned at the strange quietude it brought to him.“You don’t want to know-““Harry, I want us to be friends - somethings saying things out loud is good.” There it was again, that comfort, that caring, something so welcoming and helpful but Harry could not place his finger on why it shocked an unsettled him. Their eyes met, and Sirius had inched closer until their knees were pressed together.His throat closed up, choking on the sentence he had locked down, the ground cold and hollow ready to steal him away from this bastardly conversation. Sirius placed a hand atop of his own, curling his fingers around as if Harry was a precious glass that could crack with any wrong move.“He died.”Harry could not tears run down his face but by Sirius’ expression he could have been convinced he was sobbing. The other’s hands slipped away, moving to encircle his back and pull him into a tight hug. “Merlin Smith, what happened to you,” he growled, pulling back to meet Harry’s downcast gaze.His lips went dry, as he slipped from Sirius’ embrace it took moments for his mind to catch up with him. Harry had long accepted his lover’s death, its pain never truly gone but when faced with the countless losses in the war it grew to be something accepted. But this hug was not, Sirius had hugged him and it had that strange feeling about it too. Strange because Harry relished in this comfort, but knew that it felt dangerously different to that of the Sirius he once knew. Here was a Sirius who looked and saw him differently but cared, nonetheless.“It’s okay, I accepted it,” Harry murmured, reaching down to pull Sirius’ hands off of his back but letting them sit in his grip. “I had to move on eventually.”“But that’s just it! You shouldn’t have had too.” This was true, Harry never quite had the appetite for death yet still cold lifeless bodies always found their way into his life. Harry hummed his agreement but could not bare to move to meet his eyes.“Trust me, I know, but I don’t want to talk about it,” he sighed helplessly, forlorn with grief and guilty. “I’m so tired.” Letting his eyes flutter shut, he let his head fall in the crook of Sirius’ neck - taking in its warmth and relief.“Of course,” Sirius said but it lacked its usual flare of confidence, an almost unsure stutter. He laid the two of them down gently, and Harry relished in the calming melody of Sirius’ heartbeat - so exhausted from just the reminder of a long hurting memory, he found himself falling unashamedly asleep next to Sirius Black.