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Mello woke up at around 4 am with a strange feeling. He couldn't really place a finger on it, but something felt...off. It was still dark out. He looked over to Matt, who was sleeping next to him. He sighed. He decided to get some chocolate, maybe he was just tired. After all, he could've just woken up due to a bad dream he just couldn't remember. It wasn't impossible, it would also explain the put-off feeling.Mello went to the kitchen of their medium-sized apartment and grabbed a few bars of chocolate before heading back to his and Matt's shared room. He sat down on the bed careful as to not wake Matt. He unwrapped a chocolate bar and began eating away at it. Mello ate a few more bars before deciding to at least try to get some sleep. He went and brushed his teeth before laying on the bed once again and laid there for a while before actually going to sleep.-Mello woke once again, but at daylight this time. Matt was up to, obviously, Mello didn't even have to look to know that due to the noise of artificial gunshots and explosions coming from the other room. Mello stood up and immediately began to feel nauseous. He rushed over to the bathroom and threw up in the toilet bowl. After he finished vomiting he lingered there for a little before feeling another wave rise."You obviously need some milk.""Fuck off Matt."-After Mello got over his morning vomit session, the day seemed normal with Mello throwing up a few more times. As well as Matt's occasional comment.
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Mello has been vomiting every day for roughly 3 weeks. Matt was little to no help. Mello didn't know what was going on for once. He was confused. Matt was just as confused as Mello but still obviously worried.Mello had no change in his eating habits, nor went nearby anything that could have led to him throwing up. And there was no change in his daily routine. Mello looked back on what had happened before this started. He interacted with a drug dealer because some of the mafia members wanted drugs and sent him to get them, damn pricks couldn't be bothered to do it themselves. Went to the store with Matt. Allowed Matt to fuck him, multiple times. Interacted with the drug dealer, same reasons. Weapons dealer.It was confusing. The hell could've led to this? Mello was tired he could deal with this later.---------------------------"The hell is that bastard!" Rod Ross yelled as he was currently blowing a fuse."Maybe he got shot or some shit.""Quiet Skyer! It has been 3 weeks. 3 weeks!""Right.." he grumbled the next part "even though bullet wound take at least 6 weeks to heal, that guy would return in less even with the injury.""Maybe he's in a sugar coma from all that chocolate he eats. It'd make sense." Jack Neylon stated in a slightly joking manner. Though Ross didn't seem to care, much less acknowledge that he spoke."..No, I think there's something behind this. He wouldn't just up and leave, unless something happened... Jose!"Jose looked towards the mafia boss, "Yes?""Track him down. If you find him don't take action, report to me what's going on."Jose nodded.
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Mello has been feeling more tired than normal. This state lasts a day or two almost every time. Others last 3-4 days. This, accompanying the morning sickness, is now utter hell. Matt and Mello decide to call in a friend, "Kitulus", who is an expert in the medical field, and goes out on the field often, he was in Wammy’s house along with the others, he was the 4th on the so-dubbed “chart.” He got along with Matt and Mello quite easily also, so that was a plus.Matt dialed his number, he picked up on the second ring."Hello" It came more as a statement than a question."Hey Kits, it's Matt.""Sup Matt.""Yeah I was calling to see if you could come over, something's up with Mello." There was a hum of acknowledgment before he answered."Yeah, sure I'll be there in a few.""K, bye""Bye"-"So what's been going on?" A voice piped up out of seemingly nowhere.Matt and Mello jumped and looked towards the armchair the was resting beside the couch where Mello was and Matt was leaning on. Kitulus came around 15 minutes after the phone call. He didn't need to knock. He didn't use the door either. He simply lock picked the window and came in. Their apartment was on the 5th floor. How he got up to the window, the two men didn't know and probably never will.Mello visibly glared at the dark-haired man."How the hell'd you get in here?""Skills ma' dude, skills""Whatever.""Alright-y, now what's been going on as of late?""Well, I've been throwing up daily and getting tired out of nowhere. I don't know what's up. These past weeks have been hell.""Fatigue and Nausea. Noted. Now, Matt, can you exit the room please?""Why?""Reasons. Just go.""Alright then.." They watched as Matt went into the other room."And no smoking!" A finger came from the doorway before disappearing. Kitulus rolled his eyes."Why did you make Matt leave?""I have my reasons. Now, lift up your shirt.""Is that why you made Matt leave? Then you should know that Ma-""You guys fuck regularly. I know, but that's not why."Mello questioned further, annoyed that he cut him off. "Then why did you make him leave?""Because, if I'm correct about this I'd like to talk to you without Matt in the room. Now, lift up your shirt."Mello restrained himself from questioning more, sure he would find out what the dark-eyed man was thinking either way and complied. The ever-so-slight enlargement of the stomach area, barely noticeable to the average eye, showed. Kitulus only needed a quick glance at this to confirm his guess. He looked Mello in the eyes."How long have you been throwing up liquid chocolate?""It's not liquid chocolate. Just vomit.""Fine, but how long""Four weeks, this being the fourth.""Alright, now, my original theory is accurate.""And what would that be?""You're pregnant.""Ha, ha very funny. Now spill.""I'm not joking, Mello. If you don't believe me, I can get a pregnancy test stick for you. Or even another doctor. Which one?" Kitulus' poker face turned into a challenging smirk as he said this."But, it's just not possible. I'm male.""You sure 'bout that?" A devious smirk replaced the challenging one. "The fact that you're pregnant proves otherwise.""I don't have tits and I have a dick. I'm male.""Pregnant""Fine. Let's say I am 'pregnant.' How would that even happen?""As I stated earlier, 'you guys fuck regularly.' You guys, being, You and Matt."Mello remained silent. Kitulus had a point. Was he pregnant? No, that's not possible. But, then again, all the facts point to that one conclusion. So, was what the black-clad man was saying.. true? Mello contemplated this for a moment a visible deadpan overcoming his features. Alright so maybe Mello was pregnant. How were they to tell Matt? Oh right, that's probably why he made him leave the room. To think of a solution for that."Alright fine. I'm pregnant. Now, How do we tell Matt?""Not even gonna ask how far along? Okay."Mello sighed. "Fine, how long?" Annoyance dripped from his voice."10 weeks.""How do you get 10 weeks from this?""Well the earliest the morning sickness can start is four weeks. Average is six. If you started earlier the enlargement wouldn't be showing by now. You started vomiting at six weeks. This is the fourth week, correct? That would mean you are 10 weeks along in your pregnancy.""..Fine. But, seriously, how do we tell Matt?"Kitulus shrugged. "Pretend It's like some serious thing like cancer or Ebola, then tell him.""Kitulus.. You have problems."He chuckled quietly, like a crazy person. "Oh yeah, I'm locking up your chocolate. You can't have so much sugar during your pregnancy."Mello pouted like a child but didn't argue knowing he was right."And Matt must stop smoking. It creates a harmful environment for everyone."----------------------------Jose came into headquarters a week later."Did you find anything?" Ross' voice boomed from the couch he was sitting on."No, with no leads I can't get anywhere.""Then why the hell're you here? Go out and look! And don't come back till you've got something!" His voice really couldn't be louder than it was now."Yes, boss" Jose exited the building and continued his search.The Mafia is not worried about the safety of Mello they knew he could take care of himself. They were more angry, angry at Mello for abandoning the mafia. If he were gone for a day, it’d be fine. A week’d be alright as well if he were injured in some way, but he wasn’t injured, there were no dangerous tasks he had taken care of except the weapons and drug dealers, but some of the others were there. He just up and left. The hell?!They needed to find him. Now.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
"Matt, you can come in now!"Matt walked into the room, noticing Mello and Kitulus' poker faces. Mello’s laced with a trail of confusion and shock. He worried about Mello’s health, afraid it was serious.“So uh, what’s the matter?” Totally not awkward.Kitulus walked past Matt into the kitchen and came back a few moments later. Carrying a jar of ‘Prego pizza sauce’ and placing it on the small table in the center of the room. Mello raised an eyebrow before cracking his composed state, erupting into laughter, Kitulus following soon after. Matt stood between the two laughing maniacs, confused.“What the fuck was that?” Mello said between laughs and giggles.“I don’t fucking know!”“You put it there!”“I know!”"Why?!"“Logic!”“There is no logic to that!”“Yes, there is logic!”“What logic?”“What even is logic?”“Logic is dead”“Yep.”Kitulus popped the ‘p’ “So is the faith in humanity”“The actual truth”“Yep.”“What the fuck is wrong with you”“Many things, my friend, many things”“Why, exactly?”“Life”“Life is hell”“True”Matt decided to butt in at that point as the laughter had died down. “Uhm… Can someone please explain what the hell’s going on?!”“Oh yeah, Mello, shall you do the honors?”Kitulus bowed in a joking matter while Mello just rolled his eyes.“Sure…”“Well?”“Uhh… how do I explain this?.. I - apar - uhm..”“Mello’s a woman!”Kitulus shouted obnoxiously.“I am not!”The rather rude man stayed silent but gave the couple a shit-eating grin while leaning on the coffee table next to the jar of ‘Prego pizza sauce’ from his spot that he took on the floor shortly after his exaggerated bow.“What do you mean by that?” Matt asked knowing by that face it wasn't just Kitten’s usual teasing, there was something going on. Whatever's happening will come to light soon anyway as they were in the middle of telling him.“Oh, I don't know.. Whatever do I mean?”“You know, I don't.”“Ask Mello.”“Goddamnit. Mello, the hell is he talking about?”“Well.. Apparently.. According to Kitulus.. Well he said, it's really absurd actually I don’t even know how he got to that conclusion actually.”Matt spoke up, getting more annoyed with the stalling, “Just say it.”“Well, I uh.. Okay, so according to Kitulus apparently I’m .. Er- pregnant. ”“What? But that's not possible.”“I know that's what I was saying! But, all the symptoms match up.”Kitulus chose that moment to say something, “Do you want me to grab some damn pregnancy tests from the pharmacy or some shit? ‘Cause I can do that if you want.”“Yeah go fetch that shit. Then we can clarify reality for a minute. Mello can’t get fucking pregnant.”“The damn reality is right in front of your Goddamn face you little shit.”Kitulus being Kitulus couldn’t resist saying something perverted and rude when given the chance, “Though, damn straight you're fucking. It’s what led to this current predicament, the fact that you can't keep your fuckin’ shrimp dick in your pants. Oh wait, I don’t think I can say ‘straight’ for you guys. Well, but, then again Mello is a woman..”By the time Kitulus finished his retort he had made it to the window, slipping out of the apartment and into the streets. Escaping the wrath of the now pissed off couple.-----------Kitulus returned to Mello telling Matt why he can’t have a smoke, ten to fifteen minutes later.“-Because It's bad for everyone around! That includes you! This shit can kill you! You know that!”“Well, maybe that's the grand plan!”“Why!? Is it because you don't like me?”Mello looked like he was about to cry. Shit. Not now. God no. Damnit. Why? Why now? Fuck.Kitulus, noticing this, swiftly stole the pack of cigarettes from Matt’s hand and circled around him to Mello. Sitting him down on the couch before sitting next to him.“I’m sure he didn't mean it like that. It was just a joke.”Kitulus glanced at Matt, “Everyone jokes around like that. Ya’know?”Mello calmed down a little and nodded, “Yeah. Yeah, you're right. I guess I just overreacted. I don't know why though.”“That's okay, and the reason you reacted like that is due to hormone increase. It shouldn't happen too often as of now, but later on, it could occur almost weekly to daily. Though usually, it depends on the person.”“Damn. Really hope it doesn't happen often to me.”Matt just stood where he was. Being ignored, until Kitulus turned to him.“Matt, I’m on Mello’s side. No smoking anymore. It's not good for anyone. Forty-one thousand people die from exposure to secondhand smoke per year. Also, kids who are exposed to secondhand smoke die early. Now, do you want that?”Matt sighed, “No, of course not.”“And I’m taking all your fags so there's no need to worry about that.”“He could go to the store and get some more.” Mello piped up, “Thought of that?”“All taken care of.” Kitulus smiled a sinisterly innocent smile. “Oh, and I got your shit.” He pulled out a box of pregnancy tests, tossing it on the table lightly.“But our dear Mello has shown yet another symptom of pregnancy. So, I don't really think we need that testing thingy. You are welcome to still use them though.” Another smile.-----------Earlier -Kitulus walked through the doorway of the liquor store, up to the counter.“Hello is there anything I can do for you, ma’am?” The woman at the desk asked.“Just one thing,” Kitulus pulled out a photo of a certain redheaded gamer giving the woman a smile, “I’m trying to help my friend stop smoking. If he comes ‘round here can you remind him of his goal to quit please?”“Of course! I’d do anything to help people reach their goals!” The cashier smiled cheerfully.“Thank you. You've been a great help! Have a good one, kay?” Kitulus said to her as he exited the building.“You too!” The woman called back before he went back to work.“Many more places to go,” Kitulus muttered before going off to the next liquor store that sold cigarettes.--------Mello reentered the room. Pregnancy test in hand.“It's positive. Kitulus' right.”“In your Goddamn face Matt! How’s that for reality?”“Fuck off.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The days went by as it did now since this strange situation began to unfold. When Mello woke up, he threw up for a bit. Not forgetting to hate every moment of it. Matt still worried, even though it was mostly cleared. All the while making remarks about this whole situation. Kitulus showed up for the (apparently) now daily check-up, then stayed around for the entire day until Mello gave into sleep. During these long hours, the bitch limited Mello’s chocolate consumption to four or five bars a day. (Because that was the lowest he could get it without acquiring any bullet holes.) As well as making him eat healthier. Though Mello put up a bit of a fight claiming he could stay up a bit longer, he usually ended up passing out around nine or ten.
Though the constant cycle was broken when
Kitulus brought in a small project he was working on. He climbed in through the window with a little black box, the kind that normally holds necklaces or bracelets. The ravenette made his way over to Mello who was on the couch.
“‘Sup, dipshit,” He called, laying over the back of the couch upside-down.
“Stop talking to yourself,”
“Bitch, I can fucking talk to myself whenever I damn please!”
“So, you admit you’re a dipshit?”
“Did I ever say I wasn’t?”
Mello rolled his eyes, “Of course.”
Kitulus
waved the box in front of him and grinned. “You got a gift.”
Mello raised an eyebrow in question as
Kitulus handed him the box. He opened the box and looked at the choker inside. It was black and made of leather, it had a silver cross on the front and studs around it.
“And why are you giving this to me?”
“It’s not just a choker. It's a voice modifier.”
Kitulus said as if were the most obvious thing in the world.
“Why the hell would I need this?”
“Well, your voice is a dead give away to your gender. This makes your voice that of a woman’s.”
“That doesn’t answer my question.”
“Do you want to bring attention to yourself? I know how much you just love attention, but I’m not exactly sure that you’d want to bring attention to yourself as a pregnant male. The whole world’ll be on your case. Just imagine what people would do, forget the public, the government. I mean, who knows what those people would do? What crazy experiments will occur, what would they fucking do? It’s completely unknown! I mean seriously, they could just cut you open to see what the fuck is going on! Regardless of human life!-”
“Kitulus, calm the fuck down. The majority of that is probably unlikely. Though I get your point - bad things might happen.” Mello deadpanned, interrupting Kitten’s rant.
Kitulus
sighed, “Yeah ok, whatever, though who knows what kind of shit goes down in that place.” He muttered the last part.
“Kitulus, your conspiracies are probably not true.” Mello rolled his eyes. “Now, back to the original subject.”
Kitulus
huffed, “‘ Probably.’ Anyways, you’re already pretty antisocial, seeing as you never talk to the people in town.. And you already look female..”
“Shut it.”
“Hey, be glad you can easily disguise yourself.. Even if it is by looking like a woman.” This statement earned a glare from a now pissed off blonde, which the rude ravenette only gave a shit-eating grin in return. “ Seriously though, you don’t talk to anyone. Like every time you go into public, like a store or some shit, you get Matt to do shit for you. And then when you don’t bring Matt along, maybe doing something or buying him a gift or some shit, you drag me along. I just want to watch some anime and read some manga or some creepypasta, maybe go to a con or stay holed up in my room playing COD zombies with a bunch of dumbasses online.” He basically whined.
“Grow up, you fucking otaku. Plus I talk to you and Matt, you guys are people. Well, Matt’s a person, I don’t think I can say that about you..”
“Or listen to Panic! at the Disco, My Chemical Romance, Bring me the Horizon, Twenty Øne Piløts, Fall Out Boy, etc.”
“Better, though your pass times are boring.”
“I know, I’m very boring.”
Mello rolled his eyes. “Obviously.”
“Well, there’s not really anything going on anyways. The most entertaining thing going around here is annoying the fuck outta Matt in COD by either constantly targeting him, camping, or acting like a complete noob. Speaking of Matt where is he?”
“Still passed out on the bed. I swear he sleeps like a dead person.”
Kitulus
chuckled suspiciously at this statement.
“What?”
“Oh, nothing.”
“Seriously tell me.”
“About what?”
“About what the hell’s so funny.” Mello was getting more irritated by the second.
“I just thought of a really dirty joke.”
“Really? That’s surprising.” Note the sarcasm. “Is there a day you don’t have something dirty on your mind?”
“Nope.”
Mello sighed, “God, why am I even friends with you.”
“‘Cause, Bitch, I’m fucking fabulous as fuck!”
“No, no you’re not.”
“I know, I’m just a strange potato.”
“Wh- You know what? I’m not even gonna ask.”
He got a laugh in response. “Why don’t you go ahead and put that choker on.”
“You can’t tell me what to do.” Mello snapped. “ Though, I would like to see how this thing works. Not because you told me to.”Kitulus
rolled his eyes, “Sure, whatever you say.”
“I mean it. God damn bitch.” Mello muttered the last part.
Kitulus only laughed at this.
Said blonde ignored the damned piece of shit and put on the choker. “So, think it can pass?”
“Hell yeah. I mean I did make it.”
“Fucking bitch.”
“Hoe.”
“Slut.”
“Cunt.”
“Thot.”
“The hell’s going on here?”
“Oh shit.”
“Nothing. Well except the fact you just scared the shit outta Mello and I made a voice-altering choker.”
“Okay then.”
And with that Matt went into the kitchen for some coffee because in ‘Matt-time’ it was too early for this bullshit, even though it was around noon. Lazy fucker.
“Anyways, besides that, I need to address an issue.”
“What?”
“Twelve-week scan.”
“What?”
“The twelve-week scan, ya’know ultrasound ‘n shit? Lets you see how the embryo slash fetus is progressing?”
“Yeah, I gathered that much, bitch. I’m saying ‘why?’.”
Kitten rolled his eyes. “Because, dumbass, progress. It can also detect any issues such as Downs Syndrome. Get why it is important. Need me to spell it out for you?”
“Damn, chill. The fuck got you so pissy?”
“This lil piece of shit on the internet can’t spell, and probably never heard of research. Tryna make a character with Bipolar one. Not even doing it right.”
“You were fine a minute ago. Why this ticking you off now?”
“No idea. But anyways,” The strange being perked up “back on subject! Twelve-week scan. Next week. Gotta get that shit done. I’m gonna go bribe and may or may not use death threats on another doctor or two.”
“Can’t you just do it?”
“Pssssh, no. You think I got that equipment shit lying ‘round? Hell no! Just deal with it ya lil pussy.” And with that, the strange ravenette disappeared out the window. “Why the hell does he never use the door?”
“No idea.”
“Shit! Stop doing that!”
"No promises."