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“You have got to be kidding me. This is ridiculous. I can’t believe you.”“Calm down.”“No. You’re lucky I’m not screaming anymore,” Yoongi snapped furiously before he stomped ahead towards the entrance of the hotel. From the outside, it looked expensive, and the inside was no exception. Especially considering the first floor of the hotel was essentially a casino. The sound of slot machines rung in Yoongi’s ears and he could not have been in a worse mood.“Oh,” Seokjin said from behind him. “Well, we can see if anywhere else is close enough to walk to.”“No,” Yoongi said. “I’m not walking anywhere with you. And you’re paying for my room, because there is no way in hell I am sharing a room with you.”“Of course,” Seokjin said with a nod. “I wouldn’t expect you to, after everything.”“I can’t fucking believe your car broke down. This is like some kind of big cosmic joke, that I have to be stuck with you for even more time,” Yoongi muttered. Seokjin just frowned at him sadly and then ducked his head and headed towards the front counter to see if he could get them rooms for the night, at the very least.Yoongi watched Seokjin’s retreating form, the anger he was feeling turning into something worse. Something a lot like sadness and self-hatred. It didn’t help that Seokjin looked so apologetic about it all because it made Yoongi feel bad about feeling angry. Although, he had every right to be angry and upset.He wasn’t the one who had thrown everything away. He wasn’t the one who had cheated. That was all Seokjin.And Yoongi felt like an idiot for being shocked when he found out, because of course Seokjin had been cheating. They’d been planning their road trip for months, but as the date approached, Seokjin seemed less and less excited about it and more and more distant and then, halfway through their trip, Yoongi had heard Seokjin’s phone chime while Seokjin was in the bathroom at a gas station.Yoongi didn’t mean to snoop, but glanced over anyway and the texts he ended up seeing answered all the questions about Seokjin’s distance. They’d had a screaming match in the parking lot of that gas station and then Yoongi demanded to be taken home, right this instant. And because the universe hated Min Yoongi, Seokjin’s car broke down and they were stuck, for the night at least, at some hotel that Yoongi couldn’t afford, so he was left, yet again, relying on Seokjin.Still, there might have been one upside. They were at a casino and said casino sold alcohol and maybe, just maybe, Yoongi could get shitfaced drunk. That sounded really great.He shifted around awkwardly on his feet and looked around the entryway where he stood, over at Seokjin at the reception desk, and then out into the casino. Girls in tight dresses walked back and forth with trays of drinks, and men in suits with ear pieces surveyed the crowds and guests laughed and drank and had a good time.Oh, how Yoongi wished he were them.But, no, he wasn’t them and he wasn’t having a good time. He was standing, dressed in an itchy black sweater and skinny jeans that didn’t fit quite right, his hair was messy, and he probably had dark circles under his eyes. The bag over his shoulder only carried his bare necessities, but it felt heavy and his shoulder hurt.That, and he still wanted to cry.Standing there in front of countless people, he felt small, and fragile and he wanted someone to hold him while he cried about three years down the drain thanks to a few texts messages and a blowout fight at a gas station. How pathetic.And there wasn’t even anyone to hold him, because the person who had been that for him…well, wasn’t anymore.“Yoongi,” Seokjin said softly and Yoongi jerked his head around to look at him. He looked so well put-together, his hair still combed and his shirt without wrinkles, while Yoongi probably looked borderline homeless. It was unfair, and made the entire thing even worse, even more pitiful. Kim Seokjin was too handsome for his own good, and Min Yoongi wondered why he was just then understanding how foolish he looked standing next to him.“What is it?” Yoongi snapped.“I got you a room,” Seokjin said and handed over a room key to Yoongi. The sleek little card was black and gold, with a statement printed along one side that made Yoongi’s eyes roll into the back of his head.‘We hope you find what you’re looking for…’“Good,” Yoongi said shortly to Seokjin. “Leave me alone for the rest of the night and only come get me tomorrow when the car is fixed and we can leave. I’d just call Jungkook or Tae, but I don’t need…I don’t want to bother them,” Yoongi finished and turned on his heel to find the elevators that would bring him to his room.Only, he didn’t know which room he was going to.“It’s room 818, Yoongi,” Seokjin called after him, to which Yoongi replied by holding his hand up, middle finger raised defiantly.He figured Seokjin got a room too, and probably one near Yoongi’s, but if Yoongi timed everything well, he was sure he would be able avoid Seokjin. Avoiding people was something Yoongi was good at, or at least, something he had been good at, before Seokjin. And it was kind of depressing, he thought, as he pressed the up arrow for the elevator, that he was already thinking of life as ‘before Seokjin’ and now, he supposed, ‘after Seokjin’. He shouldn’t have even cared, either way, considering the shit Seokjin had pulled. But he did care, no matter how much he liked to pretend that he didn’t. Underneath it all, Min Yoongi was a deeply emotional person and he cared about the people in his life. He had cared about Kim Seokjin.Key word being had.Because he didn’t anymore.The elevator dinged when it arrived in the lobby, and Yoongi slipped inside. He was alone, and the mirrored walls reflected him, all scrounged up and red-faced from all the shouting he’d done. With a grunt, he pressed the button for the eighth floor and leaned against the wall of the elevator as he went up.A million thoughts still whirred through his head. Like, where was he going to even go when they got home? He supposed he could stay with Taehyung, but he was fairly certain that Jungkook was rooming with him, and that meant that Yoongi would have to sleep on the couch. The couch was better than nothing. Besides, Taehyung and Jungkook were fun, and they could distract him. As long as they didn’t side with Seokjin (but who sided with a cheater?).“Fuck,” Yoongi cursed in the lonely elevator. Boy band music played instead of typical elevator music, some song that Yoongi didn’t recognize that made his head pound.Luckily, he arrived on his floor and escaped the mind-numbing sound. His room was near the end of the hall, and he slipped his key-card into the slot until the door beeped and clicked open. Yoongi couldn’t have gotten inside fast enough, and once he was, he flicked on the light by the door and tossed his bag to the ground. When he looked up, into the room, his mouth fell open.The room wasn’t huge, per say, but it was the biggest, nicest hotel room he’d ever had the pleasure of staying in. If Yoongi wasn’t aware of how rich Seokjin’s parents were, he would have felt bad for making him splurge on not one, but two rooms. Only, in their nearly three years together, Seokjin had never before treated Yoongi to anything like this.There had never before been a big king sized bed with emerald sheets, or a big flat screen television. Nor had there been fancy bathrooms with a giant tub that looked like it had a Jacuzzi feature. There had never been any of it, and Yoongi gritted his teeth together angrily as he tried to figure out when, why, how. When, exactly did things go wrong? Why didn’t he see it sooner? How could he have been so stupid?~*~Yoongi took a quick shower when he managed to calm himself down, and changed back into his black skinny jeans and black sweater, because all his other clothes were still in Seokjin’s car. Once he considered himself presentable again, he ventured out of his room and back down to the lobby, which was only bustling more as the night approached.Music played loudly, all upbeat things that someone who wasn’t Yoongi might want to dance to. Laughter echoed across tables and slot machines and Yoongi slowly walked into the casino to properly take everything in.In the center of everything was a long, oval shaped bar, where both men and women were serving drinks. In the back, Yoongi could vaguely make out another bar, and tables around it where food may have been served. Large televisions casted artificial light around as they played sports, music videos, and other things Yoongi was too disinterested in to pay attention to.The floor was a dark blue carpet and the ceiling was mirrored, so when he looked up, he got a view of his own dark hair and red-rimmed eyes. “I look like a fucking drug addict,” Yoongi mumbled to himself. “That, or a vampire.”He stopped in the middle of the floor and pulled out his wallet. He didn’t have very much money on him, maybe enough to buy a few drinks, but they were probably expensive, and it wouldn’t be enough to get him drunk. And, upon further consideration, getting drunk really didn’t sound all that great.He might have enough money to get some coins and waste his money, though.There was a blackjack table to his left, except, Yoongi didn’t know shit about blackjack and he wouldn’t even stand a chance. Vaguely, he thought he might be able to pull off playing poker, but that required too much work. So, his eyes fixated on the slot machines. He went to an ATM that would exchange his larger bills for coins and smaller bills.Yoongi wasn’t stupid, he knew there was no way he was going to win anything, and he would just end up going back up to his room after a few hours and he would probably cry and fall asleep and wake up and eat at the gross complimentary breakfast bar and then Seokjin would come get him and tell him the car was ready to go. The road trip had been a stupid idea, Yoongi decided, as he gathered up his money and dragged his feet over to one of the slots and sat down at the stool.The bright lights lit up his face and Yoongi put his hand over the little lever, even though he hadn’t put any money in yet. His jaw clenched and the sound of someone cheering happily behind him made him want to pull his hair out. Still, he slid some money into the machine and pulled the lever and watched the fake wheel spin on the computerized screen. His brain barely recognized what he was looking at once it was done, and a few gold coins (which he guessed he was supposed to turn back in for cash?) spilled out into a little tray at the bottom of the machine.He took them out and stared at them, moving them around in his palm. The gold color was just like the color on his room key-card. Yoongi knew, though, that not all that glittered was gold. So, he dropped the coins back into the tray, fed the machine more of his money, and pulled the lever again.Something about it was oddly cathartic.So he did it again, and again, and again, until he only had a very little amount of money left.“You know, those things will just eat your money,” a voice said from behind Yoongi as he slid more money in.“I know,” he answered without turning around.“I mean, I think I saw someone get a jackpot earlier,” the same voice said. Yoongi felt them sit down at the machine next to him. “But, that was only after hours of them sitting there, and they probably had more money than what it looks like you have. No offence.”“None taken, I’m purposefully being self-destructive,” Yoongi deadpanned as he pulled the lever for the last time. Of course, he got nothing, and he turned to face the stranger beside him.The first thing he noticed was their hands, knobby and thin, but tan and somehow strong, which were holding two drinks with umbrellas sticking out of them. Yoongi trailed his eyes up to the strangers face and bit his bottom lip.They were handsome, that much was apparent. Except, it was in a way that wasn’t inherently handsome, more in a way that you really had to get to appreciate. The man had a long face, bright brown eyes, and heart shaped lips, all framed by blonde hair that was only slightly grown out, showing his darker roots.Yoongi never really thought he had a type before, he’d always just figured if he was attracted to someone, he was attracted to them, but the truth was he probably did have a type. And the guy in front of him was his type. He was his type in a way that Seokjin never had been. Sure, Seokjin had been attractive, Yoongi had been attracted to him, but everyone knew Seokjin was handsome. Yoongi was attracted to Seokjin because he was attractive, plain and simple, but there wasn’t really anything specific to discern his attraction.Whereas, Yoongi could specifically say that he was attracted to the guy in front of him because he was lean and lithe, but somehow built. His legs filled out the dark jeans he wore and the black t-shirt he was wearing showed off his arms. Yoongi also liked his skin, a tan caramel, and the way he could tell that he was taller, but not too much taller. He was just tall enough that Yoongi wouldn’t really have to stand on tip-toes if he wanted to kiss him.Not to mention his voice. Rough, like Yoongi’s, but with an up-tilt that made Yoongi want to smile.“You want a drink?” the guy asked and held out one of the glasses in his hand.“No,” Yoongi answered. “How do I know you aren’t trying to drug me?”“Oh,” the guy looked down into the drinks. “I guess…you don’t? But, I’m not, I promise!” he exclaimed and then took a sip from both the drinks to prove his point. “See?”“Well now you probably got backwash in it, so I especially don’t want it,” Yoongi said.“Fair,” the guy said and laughed and turned and set the drinks on the empty chair on the other side of him. “But if you do want a drink, my friend Jimin works at the bar and he’ll give you one for free.”“You could be tag teaming to drug me,” Yoongi said bluntly.The guy laughed again, his teeth were big and blindingly white, and little dimples appeared.“Okay, also fair,” he said. “I mean that is for sure not what is happening, but I get it.”Yoongi blinked a few times and pursed his lips before putting his remaining amount of money into his pocket. “So, did you just come over here to tell me I was wasting my money?” Yoongi asked.“No, not really, I don’t think,” the guy said with a shrug. “You were just sitting over here by yourself and—”“So you’re saying I look like a loser?”“No!” the guy covered his face with his hands and groaned. Yoongi smiled when he wasn’t looking and shifted around in his little stool to face him better.Usually, Yoongi tended to like men who were older than he was, but he couldn’t really tell if this guy was or not. He had to be around Yoongi’s age, but he was clearly in better shape than Yoongi was, and judging by the way he’d so brazenly sat next to him, more confident, too.“You know I’m messing with you, right?” Yoongi asked softly and the guy peaked through his fingers.“Really? Aish, you almost really hurt my ego,” he said and Yoongi chuckled. “Wanna go sit somewhere else before we’re tempted to gamble away the rest of our money?”Yoongi shrugged, but stood anyway and let the guy lead him over to the bar in the middle of everything. It was surprising that Yoongi so easily accepted the offer, considering he had been looking forward to sulking alone. Except, now that he wasn’t alone, he felt a little bit less shitty.The stranger pulled out a chair for himself and for Yoongi and then they slid into their respective seats. Behind the bar, a small guy with pink hair came up to them. “Did he fall for your ‘want a drink’ bullshit?” the pink-haired kid asked the stranger.“Sort of?” the stranger looked at Yoongi expectantly.“Sort of,” Yoongi agreed.“What’s your name?” the pink-haired kid asked Yoongi, and he answered. “Cool, well, if you want anything to drink, properly, because I totally saw him drink from both drinks, just shout at me!”“Jimin is the best,” the stranger said, still not saying his name. “So, you aren’t from here, are you?”“No,” Yoongi answered and looked around. “I mean, I don’t think so. Where is ‘here’?”The stranger laughed. “You don’t know where you are?”“I do not,” Yoongi answered. He traced the lines of wood on the counter of the bar and glanced at the man next to him out of the corner of his eyes. “It’s kind of a long story.”“Well, you’re in Gwangju,” he said. “I’m from here, but Jimin isn’t. He just moved down here recently. Where’re you from?”“Gwangju? Shit, wow, I was not paying attention to my GPS…” Yoongi murmured to himself. “But, uh, I’m from Daegu, but…I live in Seoul.”“How’d you end up here?”“Uh,” Yoongi suddenly wished he did have a drink. “My now ex-boyfriend cheated on me and I found out while we were on a trip, and…and his car broke down and we’re stuck here.”The stranger blinked, frowned, then nodded. “Wow, that’s um, weird,” he said, to which Yoongi scoffed. “No, I just mean, me too.”“What?”“I got cheated on, too,” the guy said.“Oh.”“Yeah.”They sat there in silence for a few seconds, but it wasn’t really awkward. It was more comforting than anything. There was a high probability that this guy next to him wasn’t even into him. Maybe he was just polite. He hadn’t said his ‘boyfriend’ cheated on him. He just said he was cheated on, in general. Really, Yoongi shouldn’t assume anything. Only, since he took getting drunk out of the equation, and there was not enough money left to waste, getting laid sounded pretty good.Especially considering the guy next to him was attractive, and kept chewing on his bottom lip, something Yoongi would have very much liked to do.“So, how come you didn’t just call a cab?” the guy asked finally.“I didn’t want to pay for it,” Yoongi admitted. “So, I’m just waiting for the morning and hoping that…that he’ll figure out what’s wrong with the car. I made him buy me a room to myself, so at least I don’t have to share a room with the guy.”“Do you know who he was cheating with?”“Nope.”“Well, I can’t imagine why anyone would cheat on you,” the guy said with a small smirk.“Well, I can’t imagine why anyone would cheat on you,” Yoongi retorted.The guy smiled again. “Oh well,” he said. “It gave me an excuse to come here and see Jimin, and also you, I guess. I get free drinks and food here, which is always nice. If you ask around, you can even find someone who witnessed my table dancing escapade of 2015.”“Wow,” Yoongi said. “Did you strip too?”“Depends on who you ask,” the guy answered slyly.Oh. Okay, maybe he was flirting.“Right, and do you often offer drinks to lonely looking guys at slot machines?”“No,” the guy said. “Most of them are old dudes that smell gross and girls that are almost definitely underage. You’ve been the only cute guy at a slot machine.”Yoongi rolled his eyes, but the smile on his lips betrayed him. “Maybe it isn’t so bad that I got stuck here, then,” he said, his voice low and his eyes narrowed.~*~Thud.Yoongi whined when his back hit the door of his hotel room, which clicked shut behind him and the key-card fell out of his hand and onto the floor somewhere. It didn’t matter, he would find it later. Right then, though, he was focused on kissing hot, blonde, slot-machine-pick-up guy. His skin was on fire wherever the other man touched him, and he arched into his lean figure, wanting more. Craving it.It was been too long since someone had touched him with that much passion.Too long since someone had kissed him like this guy was kissing him. Messy, but calculated, his tongue gliding in and out of Yoongi’s mouth and his teeth nipping at all the right times, all the while Yoongi pushed back with everything he had, sucking the guy’s tongue into his mouth and causing him to groan, while Yoongi arched off the door behind him.It was the guy, whose name Yoongi didn’t even know yet, who broke the kiss first, but only so he could kiss Yoongi’s neck, and pin Yoongi’s hands above his head. “Hey,” Yoongi said. “Hey, I don’t even know your name.”The guy chuckled against his skin and bit down lightly on Yoongi’s neck, swirling his hot tongue against the area before leaning back to look Yoongi in the eyes. The room was dark, and they were both dressed in dark clothes, so it was hard to make out the guy’s whole shape, but his eyes were bright enough to be seen in any level of darkness.“Hoseok,” he said. “My name is Hoseok.”“Okay, great,” Yoongi said.Hoseok smirked and pressed his mouth back on Yoongi’s, parting his lips and slipping his tongue inside before talking right into Yoongi’s mouth. “Why’d you ask? Need to know what name to scream, Yoongi?”Shit, Yoongi thought. That hadn’t been his purpose for asking, no, but his brain instantly began to think of the possibilities. He was almost certain that Seokjin was staying in the room next to him or across the hall. The thought of Seokjin hearing Yoongi as he was being fucked by…Hoseok, well, that was undeniably satisfying.However, Hoseok seemed to sense that was what Yoongi was thinking. “Hey, listen, we don’t have to do this. I don’t want to fuck up anything if you think you’re going to try and fix things with your ex,” he said. “And, if you’re still hung up on him—”“I’m not,” Yoongi said quickly. “He cheated on me. He can go fuck himself and you can…you can fuck me.”“Then, when you come, you aren’t going to be screaming just so he can hear,” Hoseok said and closed his teeth over Yoongi’s bottom lip to pull it back sensually before letting go. “You’re gonna be screaming only for me, baby.”Yoongi scrunched up his nose. “How old are you, anyway?”“Twenty-three.”“Ha! I’m twenty-four!” Yoongi said and bounced on his heels.“Okay, want me to call you hyung or something?” Hoseok asked cockily.“No,” Yoongi answered quickly. “Just kiss me.”“Okay, hyung,” Hoseok teased.Yoongi grimaced and pulled Hoseok back against him by the collar of his t-shirt so their lips crashed back together. Then, he pushed Hoseok back slightly so they walked backwards into the dark room, trying to find the bed. Hoseok’s hands crept down Yoongi’s sides to his waist, and then to his ass, where Hoseok proceeded to slip his hands into Yoongi’s back pockets and squeeze.For a brief moment, Yoongi wished that he were in better shape, like Hoseok was. But, the fact about being in a relationship causing you to put on weight was true, and Yoongi had put on some. He wasn’t twenty anymore, and where Hoseok had hard edges, Yoongi had soft ones.His moment of self-doubt didn’t last long, though, not when Hoseok hooked his hands under Yoongi’s thighs and hoisted him up so Yoongi’s legs wrapped around his waist. “Where have you even been?” Hoseok asked against Yoongi’s neck. “You’re so hot.”“Right, says you,” Yoongi replied. “Have you looked in a mirror lately?”Hoseok didn’t respond verbally, he just kissed Yoongi again, rougher, more desperate. So when Hoseok suddenly dropped Yoongi back on the bed, Yoongi yelped slightly and looked up at him. Hoseok pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it on the floor, walked over to the bedside table and flicked on the lamp there, and then returned to the foot of the bed to look down at Yoongi while Yoongi looked up at him.“You’re sure?” Hoseok asked. Yoongi was able to discern his accent, in that moment, and in the back of his mind, he wondered, really and truly, why someone would cheat on Hoseok. He’d been oddly sweet, sitting there at the bar, before the flirting got intense and they eventually decided to make their way to Yoongi’s room. That, and he was practically glowing, the lamplight casting shadows across his body and framing the muscle in his abdomen, a barely-there V leading down into his jeans.“Yeah, I’m sure,” Yoongi nodded. “Fuck me, make me scream, all that and—” Yoongi broke off and flopped back weakly onto the mattress. “Fuck.”“What?”“I don’t have lube. Or condoms. Fuck my life.”“Oh, uh,” Hoseok reached into his pocket for his wallet and Yoongi sat back up. “I have a condom,” Hoseok said and pulled it out. The little foil packet stared back at Yoongi and he licked his lips. A condom was well and good, but not good enough, not without lube. Luckily, “Here,” Hoseok said triumphantly and pulled out two little individual packets of lube. “Think we can make it work?” he asked.“Yeah, yes,” Yoongi nodded. He didn’t even give a shit about the implications of Hoseok having lube and condoms in his wallet. It wasn’t like Yoongi was stupid. A one night stand was just what he needed, anyway.Hoseok tossed the packets onto the bed with the condom and then undid his jeans while Yoongi stripped out of his shirt. And then Hoseok was standing there in just his boxer-briefs, which were tight and left little to the imagination, while Yoongi could feel himself getting harder in his black skinny jeans.“Has it been a long time, Yoongi?” Hoseok asked. Yoongi swallowed audibly when Hoseok grabbed him by the ankles and yanked him forward on the bed so that he could undo Yoongi’s jeans.“Long enough,” Yoongi answered. And it had been. There hadn’t been sex in his relationship for weeks and weeks, maybe longer, he couldn’t remember.Hoseok’s eyes met Yoongi’s, and he nodded, as if to say that he understood. Then, Yoongi lifted his hips so Hoseok could get his jeans off and they laughed when Hoseok ended up turning them inside-out when he tried to get them off Yoongi’s ankles. Eventually, they were completely off, and Yoongi tilted his chin up for another kiss, one Hoseok easily gave him.Still kissing, Hoseok lowered Yoongi back onto the bed and hovered over him. The low hum of the air conditioner and their lips sliding together was so loud, overwhelmingly so, and they weren’t even kissing with tongue in that moment, it was just their lips catching, parted slightly, over and over.And even though every small movement they made was amplified, Yoongi made out the sound of a thud through the wall, someone moving around in the next room. At that, he encircled Hoseok’s waist and pulled their chests flush together. Hoseok moaned into his mouth and wiggled his hips around, rubbing his clothed cock against Yoongi’s lower stomach.With a low whine, Yoongi managed to roll Hoseok onto his back so that Yoongi was on top of him, straddling his hips. He sat back and looked down at Hoseok under him. His lips were puffy and slick, and when Yoongi scraped his nails down his chest, faint red marks were left behind. Hoseok shuddered.Unexpectedly, Yoongi was struck with the fact that he didn’t even know Hoseok. He knew exactly two things about him: his name and that he was hot. That was about all. Oh, and that he had been cheated on too. That, Yoongi supposed, was their bonding factor.Then again, Hoseok seemed nice, funny, and his hands were rubbing up and down Yoongi’s thighs, which felt really nice. All in all, for someone who hadn’t done the casual hookup thing in ages, Yoongi thought he’d gotten pretty lucky.“You good?” Hoseok asked.“Yeah,” Yoongi answered quickly and kissed the center of Hoseok’s chest. “Can I suck you?”Hoseok’s hand tangled in the back of Yoongi’s dark hair. “Yeah, I—I’m clean and everything.”“Me too,” Yoongi said. His tongue flicked out over one of Hoseok’s nipples, causing the younger to arch briefly. The fact that Yoongi had that effect, any effect, on him, made Yoongi’s heart flutter and his dick twitch.“You don’t have to blow me,” Hoseok said when Yoongi touched the waist band of his underwear.“I offered. I want to,” Yoongi said. Then he smirked. “I enjoy sucking dick.”Hoseok might have rolled his eyes, but Yoongi pulled his underwear off and he sighed when Hoseok’s cock was freed. Not a beat was missed before Hoseok kicked his boxer-briefs down the rest of the way and then touched himself, jacking himself until he was completely, utterly hard, and Yoongi could feel himself salivating at the sight.Hoseok was thick, of an average length that Yoongi knew would press just enough down his throat and stretch his lips.So, he pushed Hoseok’s hand away and replaced it with his own before going straight for it and sliding the head into his mouth. “Yoongi,” Hoseok moaned, his hands curling in the bed sheets.Well, that wouldn’t do, Yoongi decided, and he used his free hand to grab Hoseok’s and guide it back to his hair. Meanwhile, he suckled on the head of Hoseok’s dick lavishly. His tongue pressed firmly against the underside and he covered his teeth before sinking down, a low groan emanating from both of them.The hand in Yoongi’s hair gripped tighter, and then softer, only get to get tighter again. It happened at the same time Yoongi started to bob is head, and he realized that Hoseok was pulsing his hand to the rhythm of Yoongi sucking his cock.Fuck.Yoongi slid off with a pop and licked up the precome that was leaking from the tip. It made Yoongi aware of the wet patch forming on his own tented boxers.“That was so fucking hot,” Hoseok said.“I’m not done yet,” Yoongi announced.Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted one of the lube packets, which he scooped up eagerly. “Is there a lot in these things?”“Uh,” Hoseok hesitated. Yoongi sighed and went back down on him, which he supposed wasn’t going to help Hoseok’s thought process at all. He was right about that, it didn’t, Hoseok just bucked his hips up into Yoongi’s mouth, making him gag, but not making him pull up. “T-There isn’t that much in them,” Hoseok said. “Enough for me to—holy fuck—stretch you and lube myself up, but that’s p-probably it. I might be wrong though, I haven’t used them before.”Yoongi hummed around Hoseok’s cock in understanding before sitting back up again, but not before running the flat of his tongue up the shaft.Once he was standing on his keens, he pushed his boxers down and awkwardly shimmied them down his legs, tossing them somewhere behind him. Then, he tore open the little packet.“What’re you doing?” Hoseok asked. His voice was dark, almost coaxing somehow, and he was touching Yoongi’s leg again.“Gonna finger myself while I go down on you,” Yoongi answered. Hoseok breath caught in his throat. “More efficient that way, right?”“Right,” Hoseok agreed and raised his hips up while Yoongi lubed up his fingers and set the half-empty packet back on the bed next to them. “Come on, blow me,” Hoseok urged and Yoongi just braced his hand on Hoseok’s hip, reached behind himself, and leaned back down and stretched his lips around Hoseok.Surely Hoseok was watching. Watching the way Yoongi circled his rim with his middle finger before slowly pushing it inside himself. Watching the way Yoongi took Hoseok deeper and deeper. Watching the knobs of Yoongi’s spine ripple and his back arch as he managed to get his middle finger in all the way.Yoongi bobbed his head a few times before hollowing his cheeks and swallowing. There was a burn in the back of his throat and a burn where his pointer finger started pressing inside. He probably needed more lube, but he moaned through the stretch until it felt comfortable. Meanwhile, Hoseok was pulling his hair again and Yoongi started thrusting into himself.Hoseok’s fingers pulsed to the same rhythm that Yoongi deep throated him, and Yoongi fucked himself with his fingers to the same rhythm too. It was like some filthy, sexual dance and Yoongi fucking loved it.“Yoongi, Yoongi, fuck, I’m going to come,” Hoseok said.Yoongi pulled off and purposefully let the precome and spit in his mouth drip down his chin and onto Hoseok’s hips. He continued fucking himself, though, managing to slip a third finger inside. But, his body jerked, and he whined involuntarily.“I—fucking shit,” Yoongi cursed and rested his head against Hoseok’s hips for a second. “We can come twice. If you want.”Hoseok seemed to be considering, and while he did, he petted Yoongi’s hair. “Alright,” he finally said. “I probably can.”“Probably? You fucking better,” Yoongi rasped and before Hoseok could say anything else, he swallowed him down again and continued to finger himself. It was hard in the position to get any friction on his own dick, but having Hoseok in his mouth was nearly enough and he could pretend that it was Hoseok inside him instead. The anticipation of realizing that Hoseok would be inside him soon almost made Yoongi give up on the coming twice idea, but then Hoseok yanked his hair especially hard.“Oh my god,” he moaned. “Yoongi, oh my god, you’re so sexy, holy shit.” Yoongi pried his eyes open and looked up at Hoseok through his lashes and their eyes met. “I’m going to fuck you so good, baby.”Yoongi felt himself clench around his fingers. Fuck, he was closer than he realized he was.His head bobbed faster and he sucked around the base until Hoseok was arching off the bed and Yoongi had to rise up a little and grip Hoseok by the ass with his free hand. Yoongi could feel Hoseok’s heartbeat through the head of his cock, a quick pulse, and then, when Hoseok’s back hit the bed again, Hoseok slotted his leg between Yoongi’s and hooked it over Yoongi’s opposite leg so that Yoongi had something to properly grind against.“Coming, Yoongi, fuck,” Hoseok bit out and his leg tensed where it was hooked between Yoongi’s and Yoongi squeezed his ass and Hoseok was coming. “Shitfuckshitfuck, Yoongi!”And shit, Yoongi rammed his fingers inside himself and rubbed down against Hoseok’s leg and felt himself snap, his release streaking across Hoseok’s thighs and the sheets below them. Hoseok was undulating his cock in and out of Yoongi’s mouth, and they were both shaking with the force of their orgasms, and eventually, Yoongi pulled his mouth off Hoseok and swallowed thickly. He sat up and Hoseok’s legs fell flat against the bed, Yoongi pulled his fingers out of his ass, and they both breathed heavily.“Holy shit, hyu—Yoongi,” Hoseok muttered. “Holy shit.”“Good?”Hoseok looked at Yoongi and chuckled. “Yeah, babe.” He muttered, seeming to come out of his shock relatively fast. “You’ve got…” Hoseok gestured to his own face and finished, “come on your face.” Yoongi reached up to wipe it away, but Hoseok sat abruptly and caught Yoongi’s wrist. “I’ll get it for you.”He sat up and pulled Yoongi properly into his lap before licking a fat stripe up Yoongi’s neck to his ear and then mouthing all along Yoongi’s jaw and around his mouth. When he kissed him on the mouth, Hoseok pushed what he’d lapped up from Yoongi’s skin into Yoongi’s mouth. Yoongi sighed through his nose appreciatively, licking into Hoseok’s mouth for more and sucking on his tongue.When they ran out of breath, Hoseok flipped Yoongi onto his back and started to play with his nipples, sharp tentative licks to make Yoongi squirm, but also to not overwhelm him so close after coming the first time. Still, his dick was interested, as was the rest of him, so he dug his nails into Hoseok’s upper arm to encourage him to do more. He did, by sucking harder on Yoongi’s nipple before going lower and leaving a trail of hickeys along Yoongi’s ribs.“Hoseok,” Yoongi keened, hooking a leg over Hoseok’s. He could feel the sticky sensation of his own release still there. It only made him more aroused. “Fuck me, fuck me,” he repeated the two words twice more, desperately.And maybe he was desperate. Desperate to feel something, anything. Some kind of passion and some kind of touch. Jerking off was only satisfactory for a moment, and Yoongi always just felt empty after fingering himself. Getting fucked, that was what he needed. He needed another body, someone warm and lean and tan with a rough Gawngju accent, to fuck him good and hard and leave him aching for days afterwards. He needed to feel lips on his when he came and he needed it so much that it hurt.“Hands and knees, then,” Hoseok ordered and sat back, away from Yoongi’s body. Maybe he was just as desperate.Scrambling, Yoongi managed to get himself into position, his hands curling in the comforter and sweat collecting at his hairline. What Yoongi expected Hoseok to do was pick up the lube packets and condom and get to it. Or, maybe finger him again, make sure he was ready. What Hoseok actually did was abruptly sink his teeth into one of Yoongi’s ass cheeks, and then move his head so Yoongi could feel his breath against his hole.“Is this okay?” Hoseok asked.I don’t know, is it? Yoongi thought. He was fairly certain hookups weren’t normally this…intense. They were usually just a one and done type of thing. He’d had them before, years prior, and none of them had been like this. He’d never been comfortable like he was with Hoseok, he’d never come so hard from barely any friction and a blowjob.And sure, Yoongi was into some kinky stuff (stuff he’d never felt comfortable enough with anyone else to vocalize) so it wasn’t that he didn’t want Hoseok to stick his tongue up his ass. It was just that, he wasn’t sure it was proper one-night stand etiquette to let your partner stick their tongue up your ass. Then again, Hoseok was offering and it would be rude to turn down such a polite offer.“Yeah, s’okay,” Yoongi said.Hoseok braced his hands on Yoongi’s ass cheeks and spread him apart and wasted no more time. The flat of his tongue ran over Yoongi’s hole, rough, but also somehow soft. And polite was the complete opposite of the way Hoseok ate him out. His tongue flicked in and out fast, curling wickedly inside and circling the rim. He used his teeth, biting at the sensitive skin just enough to make Yoongi moan.“Anyone ever done this for you before?” Hoseok asked. His tongue swirled around before diving back inside.“No,” Yoongi answered weakly.“That’s a shame,” Hoseok chuckled and Yoongi shouted his name when Hoseok slid one of his fingers inside with his tongue. Yoongi could feel the slickness of lube, and wondered when Hoseok had even gotten it.“Jesus, Hoseok,” Yoongi muttered when he caught his breath again.“Mmm,” Hoseok hummed and pushed his finger in deeper, which allowed him to find Yoongi’s prostate and stretch him open to get his tongue in even more.Thighs trembling, Yoongi could feel his body gunning towards a second orgasm. He had half a mind to tell Hoseok to stop, that he was going to come, but the other half of him was showing the light at the end of the tunnel: also known as not two, but rather three orgasms.One thing he wasn’t thinking about at all: Seokjin. Or the fact that he had, only hours before, found out he had been cheated on.None of that was in his head.He was just thinking about the pleasure and Hoseok.So, Yoongi leaned down on his elbows, balanced on one, and discreetly went to grab his cock to jerk himself off. Hoseok was barraging his prostate over and over with his finger and his tongue was licking the area over and over.A choked sob escaped Yoongi’s mouth when he felt Hoseok close his lips over Yoongi’s rim to suck. That, and a second finger joining the first.Yoongi couldn’t find his breath. Hiccupped moans and sobs spilled from his mouth, repeatedly, and he buried his face into the pillow under him, so overwhelmed that he wasn’t even ashamed at the hot tears that were running down his cheeks and soaking into the pillow.“Fuck, are you gonna come again already?” Hoseok asked.“S-shit,” Yoongi stammered, but he wasn’t sure if Hoseok could understand him.“I can stop, or do you want—”“Make me come now, you can still fuck me,” Yoongi blurted out. “Eat me out, fucking, just—fucking keep going,” he said.Hoseok groaned from deep in his body and went back to work. There was spit and lube and it was loud and messy and Yoongi kept shouting and whining and moaning and he sounded like a wreck. Eventually, though, Hoseok hit just the right spot, his tongue licking sweetly at Yoongi’s rim, an arousing contrast, and Yoongi tugged himself into coming for the second time, drawing in a sharp breath and letting it out in a relieved moan.“Wow,” Hoseok said and Yoongi could hear the smile on his face, the fucker.“Fuck me now,” Yoongi demanded.“Dude, you just came, like, five seconds ago,” Hoseok said.“Don’t call me dude.”“Hyung, Yoongi, cute-slot-machine-guy, you just came, like, five seconds ago,” Hoseok repeated.Yoongi scowled and looked back at Hoseok. He was hard again, of course he was, his cock curved against his stomach, tan like the rest of him and because Yoongi was admittedly a slut for taking cock in his mouth, he nearly shoved Hoseok back onto the bed and blew him all over again. However, he restrained himself.“I know. I know what I want. Fuck me,” Yoongi said.Hoseok blinked. He waved his hand in the air in a circular motion. “Turn around, I don’t want to fuck you like that.”Yoongi grunted and flipped around so he was sitting against the pillows. Hoseok leaned down and kissed him once on the mouth, which should have been gross considering where their mouths had been, on a dick and in an ass, respectively, but it wasn’t really gross.After Hoseok deemed the kiss thorough, he sat back on his heels and picked up the condom, which he tore open with his teeth (hot) and rolled on. Then, he squeezed out the lube that remained in the first packet and opened the second to slick himself up. Yoongi watched all of it, entranced. He wasn’t quite hard again, but he didn’t feel entirely fucked out, either, despite the fact that the remnants of tears still streaked his cheeks.Hoseok waddled over to him on his knees and Yoongi started to lay back, but Hoseok grabbed Yoongi’s hips and angled him just slightly farther down against the headboard. He wasn’t quite on his back. Just somewhere in between laying down and sitting.Then, Hoseok gave Yoongi’s cock a few experimental tugs, stilling Yoongi with a jolt of oversensitivity, their eyes locked as Yoongi’s mouth fell open. “Are you flexible?” Hoseok asked suddenly.“I, uh, not really,” Yoongi answered.Hoseok cocked his head to the side and considered Yoongi for a moment before he pushed Yoongi’s legs up, up, up until one of them was over his shoulder and the other was bent awkwardly out in the other direction across the mattress. Yoongi winced initially at the burn in his thighs, but was quickly distracted by the press of Hoseok’s cock against his sensitive hole.“Oh my god,” Yoongi moaned.“Want me to stop?”“No,” Yoongi shook his head.That made Hoseok smirk, one little dimple appearing and disappearing, right before he grabbed Yoongi by the hip with one hand and braced himself against the headboard with the other hand. Yoongi’s lower lip was captured in Hoseok’s lips moments before Hoseok entered him. And he entered him hard, going slow only at first before he pushed in the rest of the way in one thrust.Yoongi gasped against Hoseok’s mouth and his head thudded back against the headboard as he grasped for Hoseok’s shoulders for something to hold onto. The previous discomfort in his leg faded, even though Hoseok’s hips were slapping against his ass and forcing his leg farther into his own chest. The leg that was splayed out onto bed shook each time Hoseok’s pushed in.“God, Yoongi, fuck,” Hoseok cursed. “You feel amazing.”“Hoseok, Hoseok, harder!” Yoongi pleaded.“Yeah,” Hoseok breathed and complied. Smacks rang out in the room in sharp succession, one after another. And then Hoseok kissed him, all tongue and teeth and lips and ragged breaths. So intense that Yoongi couldn’t breathe. He could, however, feel his cock getting hard again, finally. But it hurt, an ache that Yoongi craved and wanted so badly that his body thrummed with need.Hoseok’s hand left Yoongi’s hip and instead joined the other on the headboard, so Yoongi held his own leg against his chest and tried as much as he could to meet Hoseok’s thrusts. “Close?” Hoseok asked.“Ah,” Yoongi gasped, unable to respond.Hoseok seemed to take that as a yes, because he sped up even more, grunting, gasping, and muttering filth in Yoongi’s ear. Yoongi couldn’t breathe, he felt like the air was being knocked out of his lungs over and over, but it felt so good. His head was banging against the headboard, and Hoseok cupped the back of it, kissing him yet again.Yoongi managed to gasp in one breath, long and sharp just before Hoseok hit his prostate and kissed him long and deep. Unfortunately, Yoongi had to break the kiss, but he clawed back at Hoseok’s shoulders and tossed his head back, giving Hoseok access to his neck.“Hose—” Yoongi panted.“Yeah, lemme hear you,” Hoseok whispered in Yoongi’s ear. “Come on.”Giving up on their current position, Yoongi wrapped both legs around Hoseok’s waist so he could touch himself. It didn’t take much. Seconds later, with Hoseok still pummeling him into the headboard, his body started to tense, and he practically wailed. The sound of his voice, high pitched, but somehow raspy at the same time, bounced off the walls of the room. “Hoseok, Hoseok, god yes, fucking yes,” Yoongi called out, loud, bordering on a scream. His orgasm felt like it was splitting him apart and putting him back together again, his cock throbbed and his muscles felt like stone for a moment before they melted into jelly.When Yoongi clenched around Hoseok, he came too, spilling into the condom with a shout, knuckles white where he clutched the headboard, which Yoongi realized had been banging against the wall the entire time.Several still-powerful thrusts later, Hoseok slumped and breathed hot air onto the curve of Yoongi’s neck. “I think I’ve died and gone to orgasm heaven,” Hoseok said.Yoongi opened his eyes slowly and glared at the side of Hoseok’s face. “What the fuck?” he asked, but an eruption of giggles ruined his stoniness.“Just so you know,” Hoseok said as he pulled back and out. Yoongi sucked in a sharp breath and slid down the headboard until he was lying flat on his back. His throat was dry and his tongue felt like sandpaper. “I’m going to jerk off to this for weeks,” Hoseok finished.“That’s great,” Yoongi mumbled distantly. “I’m probably just going to die right here, thanks.”Hoseok hummed, and Yoongi felt him get off the bed and wander into the bathroom. Time passed, probably not very much, and then Hoseok was back, and a cool towel was wiping Yoongi down, soothing his overheated skin.“You’re okay, right? I didn’t hurt you?” Hoseok asked softly.“No,” Yoongi answered, eyes still closed. “Just tired.” Hoseok stilled over him. “You can stay,” Yoongi said. “I’m not kicking you out.”Hoseok let out a breath. “Alright, well, you have to move so I can get the covers out from under you.”“Never mind, leave.” There was just a slight chuckle, and Hoseok tugged the blankets until he was able to put them over Yoongi. Eventually, Yoongi opened his eyes to catch Hoseok’s bare frame turning off the bedside lamp and then the dark blob that was him getting under the covers too. “Hey,” Yoongi whispered and reached out for him, his hands finding Hoseok’s chest. “I like, uh, I like cuddles.”“Really? Okay, me too,” Hoseok said and rolled onto his side to pull Yoongi close to him. They were both hot, still sweating from the intensity of it all, but that didn’t stop them from curling into each other, arms and legs tangling.“Night,” Yoongi murmured.“Goodnight, Yoongi,” Hoseok replied, and Yoongi felt the distinct feeling of Hoseok playing with his hair and pressing a kiss to the top of his head.All of it, down to that last gesture, was exactly what Yoongi had needed.~*~Someone was very rudely knocking on the door. Yoongi groaned and tried to cover his head with the pillow, but the knocking persisted, so he tossed the pillow angrily across the room and sat up abruptly, which just made his head spin.His mouth was so dry that he couldn’t swallow and his whole body felt kind of off kilter. Oh, and he was naked. That was a thing.“Fuck,” Yoongi cursed. “Hey, are you—” He looked next to him, remembered Hoseok, only to find that the other side of the bed was made and empty. As was the rest of the room. Hoseok was gone. It was cold.Asshole, Yoongi thought to himself. He should have kicked him out when he had the chance. Then again, what had he been expecting? He knew from the get go that it was a one night stand.Yoongi sighed and forced himself out of the bed and into a standing position. Once he did, he noticed his clothes were folded neatly at the foot of the bed. He hadn’t done that, so Hoseok must have. Okay, that was nice of him.Yoongi quickly stepped into his boxers and didn’t bother putting on anything else before stomping over to the door, which he threw open angrily. “What?” he snapped.“Oh,” Seokjin took a step back. “Um, I came to let you know that the car should be fixed in about an hour and a half.”“Good,” Yoongi said and crossed his arms over his chest.Seokjin looked him up and down and Yoongi literally saw his face get redder. “Uh, did you have an okay night?”“You weren’t next door?” Yoongi asked slyly.“No, I got a room on the fifth floor,” Seokjin said slowly. “I tried to get one next to you, but the guy said some old couple was staying there.”“Oh shit,” Yoongi croaked, and it was his turn to get flushed. “Well, I’m sure they had an interesting night.”Yoongi backed away from the door, but left it open and Seokjin stepped inside hesitantly. Yoongi felt his eyes on him, and more specifically, probably on the hickeys that littered Yoongi’s neck and torso. Not to mention, Yoongi was sure he looked wrecked. His lips felt swollen and his voice was cracking with every word. He was half limping. Hoseok had fucked him good.And then left, because of fucking course he did.“Did you…” Seokjin trailed off and looked away while Yoongi got dressed. Once he was done, Seokjin pointed at something on the nightstand. Yoongi followed his gaze. “What’s that?”Yoongi grunted and went over to what Seokjin was pointing at. It was a piece of paper written on the hotel issued paper that must have been in one of the drawers on the nightstand. Yoongi picked it up and scanned it.
Hey! It’s me, Hoseok! Obviously, if it wasn’t me that would be creepy. Anyway, sorry I had to go before you woke up, but you looked really peaceful and cute so I didn’t want to wake you :) however, I had a super good time last night (I think you did too??) so you can totally call me if you want, or text me.
Oh! And so you don’t think I’m just here for your ass, I am going to tell you a fun fact about myself, and when you text me, you should tell me one about you. Fun fact about me, I work in an office by day, but I’m a dancer by night (ok that makes me sound like a stripper, I’m not a stripper).At the end of the note was a phone number.Yoongi smiled and reread the little note before folding it up and shoving it in his pocket.“What is it?”“None of your business, why are you still in here? Did you think I would sleep on it and decide to forgive you for cheating on me?” Yoongi snapped.“What? No, I—”“Come get me when the car is properly fixed.”Seokjin sighed and nodded before backing out of the room. Once he was gone, Yoongi quickly got his phone from his bag and entered Hoseok’s number into it. There was a good chance he wasn’t going to text it, let alone call it, but now he had it.Just in case.~*~Most of Yoongi’s friends he only knew because of Seokjin.The closest friends, Taehyung and Jungkook, were younger than Seokjin and Yoongi both, but Seokjin met them in the many social events he attended in college, although, really he’d initially only met Taehyung, who thus introduced Jungkook into the equation. Being that they were younger, they were still in school, but they always came by Yoongi and Seokjin’s apartment for movie nights and dinner.Yoongi did, however, bring Namjoon into the friend group, his roommate from college and friend in high school. They were close, always had been, and he fit right in with the rest of them. Of course, Seokjin had plenty of other friends, too, but Yoongi never really clicked with any of them, so they rarely came by.Maybe that was a contributing factor to Seokjin’s disinterest. Yoongi really hadn’t put much effort into meet Seokjin’s other friends. Then again, Seokjin never truly asked him to. In a way, near what Yoongi now knew as the end of their relationship, the two of them had been more like roommates than two people in a relationship.That being said, they couldn’t even be roommates anymore, which meant that Yoongi had to find somewhere to stay. The apartment he had lived in with Seokjin had been Seokjin’s first, so Yoongi was the one who had to move out. Besides, he wouldn’t have been able to afford the place on his own, his paid internship at the label he worked at didn’t pay very much, and the odd jobs he worked occasionally didn’t pay very much either. What he wanted to do was be a song writer, but that wasn’t exactly easy.Yoongi sighed, all his worries and concerns flooding his mind as he dragged a suitcase with some clothes and shouldered his bag down the hallway towards Taehyung’s apartment. As soon as he and Seokjin got back to Seoul, he’d wordlessly packed up some things and left, not even calling Taehyung in advance. He just hoped he would let him in.Inside, Yoongi could hear the sound of a video game, so he knocked extra hard. A few moments passed before the door swung open. Taehyung stood on the other side, his hair all mussed up and a slice of pizza hanging out of his mouth.“Hyung!” he exclaimed through the food. “Whaph ahg hoph?”“What?” Yoongi asked.Taehyung grunted and took the pizza out of his mouth. “What’re you doing here?” Taehyung asked. “I thought you were on your road trip.”“Road trip cancelled,” Yoongi grunted. “Can I come in?”“Oh, yeah,” Taehyung stepped inside and let Yoongi into the apartment, which smelled like pizza and was, unsurprisingly, a mess. Jungkook was sitting on the couch, playing some game or another. “What happened, why’d the trip get cancelled?”“Can I stay here for a few days?” Yoongi asked, ignoring Taehyung’s question. “I’ll sleep on the couch, and I’ll find somewhere to stay soon, I’ll start looking tomorrow, but I just…please?”Jungkook turned around and paused his game. “Why aren’t you with Jin hyung?”“Do you wanna sit?” Taehyung suggested. “You look tired. We just got pizza, have some.”Yoongi nodded and dropped his bags before sinking down on the couch next to Jungkook, who instantly put his arm over Yoongi’s shoulders. “Don’t be sad hyung,” he said. “Tell us what happened.”Yoongi looked between Taehyung and Jungkook and smiled weakly. They were both close with Seokjin too, and Yoongi didn’t want to paint Seokjin as a terrible person to them. They had every right to still be his friend, and he wasn’t about to make them take sides.“Hyung,” Taehyung said carefully. “You can tell us what’s wrong.”With a deep breath, Yoongi closed his eyes and leaned into Jungkook. “Seokjin…he, uh, I found out he’s been cheating on me…” Yoongi confessed. He felt Jungkook tense next to him. “We broke up, I guess. I mean, the words weren’t said, but…we’re done. I think it had been going on for a while, actually.”“Are you—what the fuck?” Taehyung steeled himself and Yoongi watched his hands ball into fists. “I can’t believe he would do that! Cheating on you with who? What the fuck?”Yoongi smiled slightly. “Dude, clam down.”“No! That’s so fucked up! Can I kick his ass for you?”“No, Tae,” Yoongi shook his head. “I don’t want you to hate him. I think the relationship was ending anyway. Things hadn’t been right for a while.”“Yeah, because he was cheating!” Taehyung shouted. “Us Daegu boys have to stick together! I firmly stand with you and am fully prepared to kick Seokjin’s ass if the opportunity arises.”“Seriously, don’t kick his ass,” Yoongi said. “I’m fine, I think. I mean, I’m mad, and it does kind of feel like three years of my life have been a giant lie, but…I’ll be okay. I just need to find a new apartment and stuff.”“You’re welcome to stay here as long as you need to,” Taehyung said. “And, actually, I think there’s a room upstairs that no one lives in! You should ask downstairs.”“Okay, thanks,” Yoongi nodded.Jungkook squeezed his shoulders once more before grabbing the pizza box and offering a slice to Yoongi, who gratefully accepted. Taehyung plopped down on the couch on the other side of Jungkook, and for a few minutes they ate in silence.“What about Namjoon, does he need a roommate again?” Taehyung asked. “If the room upstairs doesn’t work out.”“Nah,” Yoongi shook his head. “He’s on the track to run his family’s hotel chain, I’m pretty sure he doesn’t want a roommate anymore.”“He’s actually going to take over the business? He fucking hates it,” Jungkook said, to which Yoongi and Taehyung both slapped him on the back of the head for cursing.“Well, I guess it doesn’t matter and he’s going to anyway. He’s making good money,” Yoongi said. “Better than I am.”“Uhg,” Taehyung groaned. “Growing up sucks. You get cheated on, have to have stupid jobs, and the pizza is sub-par.” Jungkook chuckled and picked up his game controller again. “You know what?” Taehyung continued. “You need to find yourself some hot dude, or girl, I don’t know what all you’re into, and get laid. We’re good looking, we should go out tonight and have fun!”“I’m on a kill streak,” Jungkook said in disinterest.“What about you, Yoongi? Since Kookie is apparently a giant dweeb.”“No thanks,” Yoongi murmured.“When was the last time you got laid, then, assuming you and Seokjin haven’t been getting it on.”“Disgusting. I’m disgusted,” Jungkook said.“Shut up, virgin,” Taehyung said and crawled over Jungkook, shoved him to the side, and squeezed between him and Yoongi. “Seriously? Let’s go out. I’m pissed at Seokjin hyung and we should blow off steam.”“I got laid last night,” Yoongi deadpanned. “I’m good for now.”“Wait,” Taehyung narrowed his eyes and Jungkook had paused his game. “Like…break up sex?”“I don’t want to hear this conversation,” Jungkook whined.“Dude, you’re twenty,” Taehyung said. “And I know you jerk off all the time, we’ve been living together for months, stop acting like you’re so scandalized. I’ve seen your computer search history.”Jungkook gaped.Yoongi just laughed and shook his head. “No, I didn’t sleep with Seokjin. Someone else. His name was Hoseok,” Yoongi admitted. “It was probably just a one-night stand.”“Probably?”“Well, he gave me his number,” Yoongi said and tugged the note out of his pocket, where he’d folded it up. “I mean, I don’t think I’m going to call it. I’m not really wanting to date anyone else right now…but, I mean, the sex was good.”Taehyung grabbed the note and opened it up, cackling softly at Hoseok’s weirdness. “You gave him a blowjob, didn’t you?” Taehyung asked. “That’s why he’s fallen for you.”“Shut up,” Yoongi muttered (even though Taehyung was right, and he was right because Yoongi often bragged about his oral abilities, usually when Seokjin hadn’t been around, of course).“You should text him. There’s nothing wrong with having a fuck buddy,” Jungkook said.“How would you know?” Taehyung asked.“I don’t, I’m just assuming.”Yoongi smiled at them, noticing the slight blush on Jungkook’s face when Taehyung spoke to him about sexual things. Maybe Yoongi wasn’t the best at deciphering relationships, but he wasn’t stupid and he could clearly tell that Jungkook had a crush on Taehyung. Once, Taehyung had gotten drunk and confessed that he had a crush on Jungkook, too, so Yoongi had no idea why they hadn’t gotten together yet.“Text him,” Taehyung urged. “Your face got all bright when you said his name. Was he nice, or was his dick just nice?”“Both?” Yoongi offered.“Wait, how did you hook up with him anyway?” Jungkook asked. “If you and Seokjin were on the road.”Yoongi quickly explained about how Seokjin’s car had broken down in Gwangju, and that they had stayed at some hotel with a casino, where Hoseok had come up to him and offered him a drink. That they’d bonded over the fact that they’d both been cheated on. Then, Yoongi said, “He lives far away, too, so I mean, it would be too much trouble to see him again.”“Hyung,” Taehyung said plainly. “A good lay is never too much trouble.”Yoongi rolled his eyes. “You’re such a weirdo,” he said. “It was just sex, one time…well, sort of one time, he probably just left his number to be polite.”“What does ‘sort of one time’ mean?” Jungkook asked, and Taehyung whispered in his ear, and Jungkook let out a small, “Oh.”“What do you have to lose though? Just text him, seriously. I need some solid entertainment around here,” Taehyung said.“I’ll think about it,” Yoongi relented, and Taehyung nodded with a sigh. The rest of the evening, they finished the pizza and played video games. Eventually, Taehyung and Jungkook went to their rooms, and Yoongi curled up on the couch while listening to music.He was working on plans, thinking about when the best time would be to retrieve his things from their old apartment, when Hoseok snuck into his mind. Yoongi took out the note again and read it a few times and before he knew it, his phone was in his hand and he was staring at Hoseok’s contact.Now, Yoongi was not a hopeless romantic who fell for every single person that gave him the time of day.With Seokjin, they’d met and hit it off, and gone on a few dates, and it was just…easy? But not really easy in a natural way, it just was there, in front of them, so they took it. Maybe they would have been better off as friends, but it just seemed like a logical step to date. They got along, so they dated. And when they’d dated long enough, they moved in together. Seokjin had a nice family, who accepted Yoongi, and maybe that was part of the attraction.In retrospect, everything with Seokjin had been very mundane. Not all that passionate.So, Yoongi typed out a quick text to Hoseok, and he sent it.Because, Hoseok had made his heart beat faster, and he petted his hair while they fell asleep, and his eyes sparkled and Yoongi really liked his voice.The text sent and Yoongi glanced over at the clock, which read past midnight, and he cursed himself for sending a text so late.Yoongi: Hi, it’s Yoongi, from the slot machine.However, a few moments later, while Yoongi was slowly melting into the couch from embarrassment, his phone buzzed against his hip.Hoseok: oh! hi!Hi? What the fuck was Yoongi supposed to say to that? He groaned and rolled onto his stomach, pulling the blanket over his head, just when his phone buzzed again.Hoseok: so, my full name is Jung Hoseok. I don’t think we exchanged all that hahaYoongi: No, we didn’t. I’m Min Yoongi.Hoseok: nice to meet you properly, then, Min Yoongi.Yoongi: So…dancing?Hoseok: oh, ha, yeah, I like to dance. I dance underground, not as much anymore as I used to but it’s a hobby of mine hence my amazing hipsYoongi: Ah, that explains everythingHoseok: so you have to tell me a fun fact about you! ;)Yoongi: Okay… I like to write, specifically music. Like, songs and stuff.Hoseok: !!!!! wow so we r both musically inclined coolYoongi: Yeah, cool :)Hoseok: so whatre doing up so late?Yoongi: I’m staying at my friends’ apartment and it kinda smells like pizza and the couch is lumpy. Can’t sleep.Hoseok: well im on the couch too we’re couch buddies im watching latenight TV its badYoongi: I imagine soHoseok: hey im sad we live so far away from each other but,,,maybe we could see each other again sometime?Yoongi: I wouldn’t be opposed to that. You aren’t a serial killer right?Hoseok: if I were wouldn’t I have already killed you?Yoongi: ??? Maybe you’re a slow burn serial killerHoseok: im not a serial killer, slow burn or otherwise idk wht u had in mind but you can always come to the hotel again actually, jimin’s dad is the manager so we could get a room for freeYoongi: Yeah, or you could come here? Is this all premature? Like, we just metHoseok: *we just fuckedYoongi: ExactlyHoseok: can I call you?Yoongi: Now?Hoseok: yeahYoongi: I guess?Yoongi braced himself, and a moment later, his phone rang, a low buzz since he had it on vibrate. He picked it up after the second ring. “Hello?”“Hi!” Hoseok’s voice was a loud whisper.“Why’re you whispering?” Yoongi asked with a small chuckle.“Oh, um, hold on,” Hoseok said. Yoongi could hear him moving around. After that, there was the soft sound of a door opening and closing. “Okay,” Hoseok said, his voice returning to normal. “What’s up, hyung?”“I told you. I’m lying on my friend’s couch under a blanket, and now talking to you,” Yoongi said. “There are some suspicious stains on my blanket.”Hoseok laughed, then, loud and bright, the sound making Yoongi smile. “Damn,” Hoseok murmured. “I feel bad for whoever cleaned the sheets on the bed we fucked on. You came all over them.”“Fuck off,” Yoongi laughed. “It’s your fault.”“I was that good huh?”“I cried, you dick, yeah, you were good.”For a few seconds, all Yoongi could hear was Hoseok’s soft breathing. And then, “Tell me something else about you.”“Oh,” Yoongi rolled around on the couch and eventually opted to sit up. “I played basketball in high school,” he offered.“No way, really?” Hoseok asked.“Why do you ask it like that? You think I couldn’t because I’m short? I would end you on the court,” Yoongi teased.“Alright, I believe you!” Hoseok said. “I played tennis. I got the bronze metal once, but there were only three teams, so I technically lost.”“Yeah, the rest of my basketball team sucked ass, so we never won anything,” Yoongi said. Hoseok snickered, probably about the ‘sucked ass’ phrasing, and Yoongi rolled his eyes, but a smile was tugging on his lips because it was the exact kind of thing Yoongi would have smirked at, too.“So we’re both underrated sports stars and musically inclined. I’d say it’s a perfect match,” Hoseok said brightly, teasing.“Mmm, for sure,” Yoongi hummed. “I’ll start planning the wedding now.”“Great, I’ll—I’ll do the honeymoon,” Hoseok murmured, his voice getting a little bit quieter. “Actually, my sister is an event planner, so I’m sure she’d love to help you with the wedding.”“I have a better idea,” Yoongi declared. “How about we skip all that and just, I don’t know, have some more great sex.”Hoseok made some kind of noise. “I know you don’t wanna date right now. Tell me if I’m wrong, but I can’t imagine that’s on your mind, since you just got cheated on. Which, I get. I don’t really wanna date either. But, in all seriousness, I still wouldn’t mind seeing you again.”“Okay,” Yoongi said awkwardly. “I mean, I have work and I’m sure you do also, but…we can talk about it more?”“Yeah, for sure, I’m not trying to be weird and pushy. Jiminie tells me I’m weird and pushy and clingy, so…sorry if it seems like I am,” Hoseok said.“It’s fine,” Yoongi murmured. “You’re probably saving me from becoming completely emotionally distant from everyone.”“Glad to be of service,” Hoseok said softly.“Are you tired?” Yoongi asked, just as softly.“In some ways, yes,” Hoseok said and there was a light thud, maybe his head hitting the wall. “But I can stay on the line.”And he did. They stayed up for almost two more hours, talking, until Hoseok said his phone was dying and he had to go. It had been nice, talking to Hoseok. Yoongi saw bits of himself in him, but he also saw aspects of Hoseok that were completely opposite from Yoongi. Things that intrigued him. He mentioned that he wouldn’t mind seeing Hoseok dance, and Hoseok just gave some noncommittal answer. They’d talked about music, and their friends. They didn’t talk about being cheated on anymore.It was almost scary, how easy it was talking to Jung Hoseok.~*~The apartment upstairs in Taehyung’s building came through, luckily, and three weeks after everything, three weeks after the cheating, the breakup, and meeting Jung Hoseok, Yoongi was fairly certain that he’d moved most of his things out of Seokjin’s place and into his own, new place. In fact, he’d just brought one last box up to the apartment. That was when he started to feel hot tears streak down his face. He was bound to snap at some point, he supposed, but that didn’t make it any easier.Not even Taehyung coming up to check on him, hugging him tightly, did anything to ease the empty pit in Yoongi’s being. Things were really, truly over between him and Seokjin. And he wanted things to be over, but change still hurt.“Yoongi hyung, you know, Seokjin hyung feels terrible too,” Taehyung said. Yoongi just choked on his own spit and buried his head in his hands. “He was upset when I spoke to him. I really was gonna kick his ass, but he looked terrible and…I couldn’t. Maybe one day you two will be able to be friends. It just wasn’t meant to be.”Jungkook relayed similar sentiments, and when the two of them were gone, Yoongi picked up his phone. He intended on just listening to music, but instead he texted Hoseok.Yoongi: Hey. Are you busy?Hoseok: i’m at the office right now its boring never get a job in accounting, you’ll dieYoongi learned Hoseok worked for some kind of business, one he didn’t recognize the name of, but Hoseok rarely mentioned it and had said one afternoon while they were talking on the phone that, ‘he didn’t want to talk about work’ and that ‘he wanted to talk about anything else, anything but work’. So, Yoongi didn’t pry.Yoongi: I took the day off I just finished moving the last of my things into my new placeHoseok: congrats!Yoongi: Ha, thanksHoseok: how do you feel about it?Yoongi: Shitty I was wondering if If maybe you were free this weekend and we could meet upHoseok: uhHhHhHYoongi: Or not It’s been three weeks, I just, I don’t know I don’t know how to do this hahaHoseok: no, its fine, I can probably meet up Saturday you want to come here?Yoongi: I can, yeahHoseok: okay yeah, sounds good I can text you an address when you get to Gwangju, theres a restaurant that has amazing meatYoongi: Okay but I just want your meatHoseok: I just choked on my bubble teaYoongi: So like are you wearing a suit right now?Hoseok: fuck off don’t try to sext meYoongi: :(Hoseok: you want me to pop a boner under my desk?Yoongi: I’m sad your boner makes me less sadHoseok: boner: killedYoongi: It could be in my mouth You seemed to enjoy that What with how you pulled my hair and arched and writhedHoseok: fUcK oFfYoongi: Ok ok fine. see you Saturday?Hoseok: yeaaah want me to eat you out again? that was so fuckin hot most people aren’t into that I cant believe you came three times holy fuck I jerked off to it, like, so many timesYoongi: get back to work see you SaturdayHoseok: okay~ see you thenBy the time that Friday rolled around, the day Yoongi was going to head to Gwangju so he could meet Hoseok on Saturday, Yoongi was sufficiently horny, and sufficiently annoyed that Taehyung, Jungkook, and Namjoon wouldn’t leave him alone.“Hyung, is this really a good idea?” Namjoon asked when Yoongi was throwing some clothes into a bag, which already contained a full bottle of lube, and some condoms. “I mean, you hardly know this guy.”“I’ve been talking to him for three weeks. He’s a good fuck, and I’m a grown man, Namjoon,” Yoongi snapped in response. “I’m not going to let him take me into a deserted alley and me and Seokjin did that defense training thing that one time last year, remember?”Namjoon’s mouth clamped shut, Taehyung shifted awkwardly by the door, and Jungkook let out a long whistle. All at the mention of Seokjin. Yoongi grunted and looked away from them to zip up his bag.“Just be careful okay?” Taehyung piped up. “Don’t get hurt.”“I won’t get hurt.”“I don’t mean physically,” Taehyung added.Yoongi sighed and pulled Taehyung into a quick hug before releasing him. “I promise to be okay. I’ll call you when I get there, will that make you feel better?”“Can you bring me back a souvenir?” Jungkook interrupted. “What is Gwangju famous for?”“They’re supposed to have good food,” Namjoon said.“Bring me food.”“Since you asked so nicely…”Jungkook grinned, not catching the sarcasm, and told Yoongi to have a good time. And that was that, Yoongi was headed back to Gwangju.~*~The restaurant was full of people and it smelled insanely good, and Yoongi felt his stomach grumbling. He hadn’t eaten anything yet that day, he’d been too nervous about seeing Hoseok. And now that he was at the address that Hoseok had texted him, his stomach was doing goddamn somersaults.“Hello, welcome, can I take you to a seat?” the hostess asked politely.“Um, I’m supposed to meet someone…” Yoongi said hesitantly. He looked around the expanse of the restaurant, trying to peer through the sea of heads for that familiar blonde hair. Suddenly, though, hands covered Yoongi’s eyes and he felt a puff of breath against his neck, so he turned around.Hoseok beamed down at him. “Hey! Are you hungry?”“Yeah,” Yoongi said. “But, like, we don’t have to eat, we can just go back to your place or, wherever.”“Um, I’m not just going to fuck you and not feed you,” Hoseok said quietly. “Let’s eat.”Yoongi nodded and let Hoseok place his hand on his lower back. The hostess took them to a table near the back and they sat next to each other, looking at the little cooking station built into the table. Hoseok licked his upper lip and took the menus the hostess handed them before walking away.“So, don’t worry, this place isn’t super expensive. I can pay if you want, but I have a feeling you won’t let me,” Hoseok said, nudging Yoongi’s shoulder.Yoongi just nodded and while Hoseok scanned the menu, Yoongi scanned Hoseok. He was dressed completely different than he had been at the casino. Instead of dark clothes, Hoseok was dressed in a bright blue button down shirt that fit a little lose, with khaki shorts that showed off his toned legs. His blonde hair wasn’t swooped off his forehead this time, instead his bangs fell over his eyes.“You look nice,” Yoongi blurted out suddenly.“Oh,” Hoseok looked down at himself. “Thanks. So do you, hyung,” Hoseok said with a small smile. Yoongi hoped he looked okay. He’d tried his best, by putting on a black denim jacket and a black turtleneck with ripped black jeans. He really needed to invest in some color for his wardrobe.“You tell me what to get, you probably know what’s good here,” Yoongi said.“Yeah, I mean, I don’t come here that often, it’s not that close to where I live, actually…” Hoseok said, and before Yoongi could ask why he’d come all this way, the waitress came and asked them for their drink orders. After that, they made small talk, but not awkward small talk, comfortable small talk. Then they ate, their shoulders pressed together in the crowded space. Every time someone passed their table, Hoseok leaned into Yoongi a little bit more.Near the end of their meal, Yoongi startled when Hoseok put his hand on Yoongi’s thigh.“You ready to go?” Hoseok asked.Yoongi ran his tongue over his teeth. Won’t it be kind of gross? he thought. Their breath was going to smell like what they ate. But, Hoseok didn’t seem to be worried about it. In fact, Yoongi sighed outwardly when Hoseok’s hand trailed farther up his leg.“Yeah, we have to pay though,” Yoongi said.Hand still on Yoongi, Hoseok reached into his back pocket for his wallet and he pulled out some cash. “I’ll pay for you,” he said quickly. “Next time, you can pay, yeah?”
Next time.
“Yeah,” Yoongi agreed.The two of them stood hurriedly and rushed out of the establishment. It was still daytime, but Hoseok asked Yoongi where he was staying, and that’s where they set their sights on.It wasn’t nearly as nice as the casino, but the little motel Yoongi chose to stay in wasn’t bad, either. It was clean and the people who owned it seemed nice. They gave Hoseok and Yoongi polite smiles when they rushed past them and when Yoongi fumbled with the key, Hoseok started to kiss the back of his neck.“Can’t wait ’till we’re inside?” Yoongi muttered.“Can’t wait ’till I’m inside you,” Hoseok retorted.“I knew you just liked me for my ass,” Yoongi muttered.“No,” Hoseok said, his voice husky and deep. He didn’t elaborate, and Yoongi finally managed to get the door open. Hoseok looked around for a second, and then his hands were on Yoongi and Yoongi’s hands were on him.They fucked slower than the time before, Hoseok let Yoongi ride him for the first bit, and then Hoseok flipped them over and marked the expanse of Yoongi’s torso, licked and fondled his cock and balls, before returning to kiss Yoongi. Then Yoongi rolled onto his back and let Hoseok fuck him into the mattress.By the time night rolled around, they were still curving together in the sheets, one orgasm each under their belts, unsure of if they were going to go for another, or just keep kissing.“Are you staying until tomorrow?” Hoseok asked.“I can,” Yoongi answered.“Yes, stay,” Hoseok breathed.“Will you be here when I wake up?” Yoongi asked, pulling away from where Hoseok was kissing his neck. His hand trialed down Hoseok’s abdomen.“I want to be,” Hoseok said unsurely. Yoongi didn’t miss the way Hoseok’s eyes flickered over to his phone, which sat on the bedside table. “Yeah, I’ll be here,” he decided.They didn’t fuck again, instead, Yoongi settled in next to Hoseok while Hoseok scrolled through videos on his phone until he found one of himself dancing. Yoongi rested his head on Hoseok’s shoulder and watched the performance, watched the way Hoseok’s body moved and the way his face was lit up.When they eventually turned the lights out, Hoseok muttered something about having to go to the bathroom, and skipped into the adjoining room. Yoongi curled up on his side and reached for his phone.Yoongi: Hey, I’m fine, haven’t diedTaeTae: GOOD was the lay good wait do you bottom? I don’t know what ur sexual preferences are whatever, hope it was goodYoongi: I’m not answering any of those questions, good nightTaeTae: GOODNIGHT! sleep tight kookie says to bring him foodYoongi smiled to himself and was busy typing out a response about how he was most certainly not bringing Jungkook any food, when Hoseok’s arms wrapped around his waist and his lips pressed against his back. “I thought there was a roach in the bathroom and nearly died,” Hoseok whispered.Yoongi froze for a moment and then giggles spilled from his mouth. “What? What was it then, if not a roach?”“A leaf, it must have come in through the window,” Hoseok whispered.“So, you’re afraid of roaches?”“And spiders,” Hoseok confirmed.Yoongi hummed softly. “Yeah, roaches and spiders are gross, I—” he was cut off by the sensation of his phone buzzing again. Hoseok propped himself on an elbow to look at the screen and they both got very still and very quiet.Seokjin: Hey, Yoongi, are you there? I don’t know if you blocked me. I was wondering if we could talk sometime soon.“Are you going to answer?” Hoseok asked. Yoongi tossed his phone to the foot of the bed and shook his head before turning around in Hoseok’s arms.“No, I’m with you, I’m not going to answer him.”And Yoongi didn’t mean to word it that way. To imply that he was with Hoseok. They’d known each other for three weeks and that wasn’t very much. They were hookup buddies. The sex was good, but they weren’t exclusive, Yoongi knew that.Only, Hoseok kissed Yoongi’s nose and Yoongi tucked his head under Hoseok’s and that’s how they fell asleep, intimate and feeling each other’s heartbeats and it sure felt like more than just a fuck buddy.That statement was also true when Yoongi woke up the next morning to the smell of sugar and cinnamon to find that Hoseok had gotten up at the ass-crack of dawn, far before Yoongi was awake, and had slipped out to go down the street and buy a box of cinnamon rolls and two cups of coffee for them to have for breakfast.“I would have paid,” Yoongi said with a yawn when he sat up in bed.“Technically, you paid for our fucking location and your trip here. It evens out,” Hoseok said with a wink. “I didn’t know how you take your coffee, so I just told them to put in a little creamer.”“That’s perfect,” Yoongi smiled and took a sip of the warm drink.“So,” Hoseok said between bites of his cinnamon roll. “Are you going to talk with your ex?”“I don’t plan on it.”“It might be a good thing,” Hoseok said. “I mean, you guys never really talked, did you?”“And I don’t want to. I have nothing to say to him. I doubt he wants to get back together, not that I do either, but he hasn’t been hanging with our usual friends, so he must still be seeing the person he cheated on me with.”“You don’t know who it was? Is?” Hoseok asked. Yoongi glanced up at him. He had icing on the corners of his mouth and when he chewed, those little dimples winked at Yoongi.“The number wasn’t properly saved to his phone, and I didn’t get a good look at it to see if it was one I knew or had seen before,” Yoongi explained. “Gimme another cinnamon roll.”Hoseok teasingly slid the box out of Yoongi’s reach. “Kiss?” he asked. Yoongi pouted and adjusted the blankets around his waist, since he was still naked. Slow, Yoongi felt Hoseok getting closer until he was nudging Yoongi’s nose with his nose. When Hoseok captured his lips, he tasted like the icing from the cinnamon rolls and he smelled just as sweet.A small whimper left Yoongi’s mouth when Hoseok pulled away, scooting the box back over to him with a satisfied smirk on his face. The conversation after that was comfortable, they kissed some more, and a little bit before noon, Hoseok stood from the bed they were lounging on.“I have to go,” he said, sounding regretful. “I have shit to finish for work, but I wish I could stay longer.”“It’s okay,” Yoongi said. He stood on his knees and scooted over to the edge of the bed, closer to where Hoseok was looking for his shoes. However, Yoongi’s naked frame distracted him. “This was nice, thanks for dinner and breakfast and for taking my mind off things.”“Well don’t say it like I’m not going to contact you ever again,” Hoseok muttered. He put his hands on Yoongi’s shoulders and kneaded the flesh in a similar fashion to how he had with Yoongi’s ass the night before. “I wanna see you again, sometime.”“Do you think you could come to Seoul?” Yoongi asked. Hoseok shrugged one shoulder and his eyes fluttered shut when Yoongi kissed along his collarbone. “Have you ever been before?”“A couple of times,” Hoseok answered. “My first two years of college were there.”“So, you lived there for two years?” Yoongi asked, leaning back. “What happened?”“Nothing, I just…decided on something different for my life.” The way Hoseok tried to act nonchalant about it all was forced, but Yoongi opted not to comment on it.“Well, if you wanna come there next time…” Yoongi let the sentence hang and Hoseok nodded. However, the devil on Yoongi’s shoulder was telling him, isn’t this too much trouble for a hookup? A hookup is supposed to be convenient.“Have a safe trip back, okay,” Hoseok said while putting his shoes on. “Text me when you get back or else I’ll be paranoid.”“Sure, I’ll probably head out in a few hours,” Yoongi explained. He then slipped back under the covers, intent on getting some more sleep before leaving, and Hoseok smiled at him from the doorway to the room.“Bye, Yoongi,” Hoseok said. He waved his hand from side to side, and then he was gone. Yoongi smiled and curled into a ball, his grin covered by the blankets, but still, he felt the force of it on his cheeks and the tingling feeling all the way to his toes.~*~“Sorry I’m late,” Yoongi muttered. “They had me filing shit, like that’s not what I thought I would be doing when I started this internship.”“It’s fine, I haven’t been here that long,” Namjoon assured Yoongi as he settled into the chair across from him. They were meeting for lunch, since they’d both been busy over the past several weeks, and what with Yoongi adjusting to his new living space. That, and his internship was coming to a close, which would determine if he got properly hired there or not. He knew he probably wouldn’t get a big position, but he hoped to start as a producer’s assistant or maybe even someone who got to work more directly with artists.“How’ve you been?” Yoongi asked.“I’ve been good. I didn’t think I would like working in the family business, but it isn’t as bad as I thought it would be,” Namjoon said. “I’m…pretty happy.”Yoongi glanced up from the menu in his hands and gave his friend a small smile. He looked happy, kind of glowing and shoulders thrown back confidently. “Are you seeing someone?” Yoongi asked, and that question seemed to somehow be the wrong one, because Namjoon’s shoulders slumped slightly. “Whoa, what happened?”“Nothing, no, I just—” Namjoon shook his head. “It’s complicated?”“Okay, you don’t have to talk about it, I get it,” Yoongi assured him nervously. “Trust me, I get complicated.”“Are you still avoiding him?”“Who?”“Jin hyung,” Namjoon said.“No, I’m not avoiding him,” Yoongi said. “We have separate lives, the only reason we even saw each other when we were together was because we lived together. We don’t hang out in the same places and Taehyung and Jungkook don’t hang out with him at their place. So, I haven’t seen him, but I’m not actively ignoring him, either.”“He hasn’t contacted you?”“He’s texted a few times. I ignore him, I don’t want to talk to him,” Yoongi said seriously. “Why does everyone want me to talk to him so fucking bad?”Namjoon shifted in his chair and looked down at the tabletop. He was worrying his lip between his teeth, and Yoongi glared at the top of his head. It used to be that he could read Namjoon well, too well, maybe. They’d been very close, but they drifted apart slightly when Yoongi started dating Seokjin, and when they started their respective careers.“Other people want you to talk to him?” Namjoon asked.“Yeah, Tae and Jungkook, you, and Hoseok,” Yoongi mumbled.“Hoseok? You’re still talking to him?”“Yes…” Yoongi said unsurely. Namjoon was giving him that look, the one that meant he disagreed or was confused by something Yoongi was doing.“How many times have you seen him, now?” Namjoon asked.“I don’t know…I guess five times?” Yoongi said. “Taehyung met him, he came here once, last month.”“It’s been almost three months since you’ve been hooking up with this guy, are you dating him?” Now Namjoon seemed curious in a teasing way.“No, I don’t think so,” Yoongi answered. Except, Hoseok had texted him earlier and Yoongi hadn’t responded yet, and his fingers were itching to type out a ‘hello’.“Well, what did Tae think of him? I didn’t know he came here.”“They only met for, like, two seconds,” Yoongi explained. He elaborated by telling Namjoon about the weekend Hoseok had come to Seoul.He left out the fact that Hoseok had seemed a little on edge the whole time. They’d gone out to eat again, Yoongi paid, and then they went to the park, even though Yoongi had resisted, but it had been worth it, when Hoseok jumped up on the empty stage there and danced.One conversation they’d had stuck in Yoongi’s mind.“Are you doing any performance for real soon? You said you dance underground?” Yoongi asked, as they sat on the edge of the stage with their feet dangling off.“No,” Hoseok answered. He looked up at the sky and closed his eyes. Yoongi studied the planes of his face, his jawline, and the curve of his lips. “I don’t do it anymore.”“Since when?”“A little while ago,” Hoseok admitted. “It just…I don’t have time, ya know?”“Make time,” Yoongi said, probably too aggressively. Hoseok had just shrugged and hopped off the stage, taking Yoongi’s hand in the process. They held hands when they left the park.Then, they’d gone back to Yoongi’s apartment, where Taehyung had stopped them in the lobby of the building. The meeting had been kind of tense, mainly because Taehyung had tried to grill Hoseok, who was sketchy and twitchy about it all. Yoongi managed to extract them, and they went up to his room where Hoseok proceeded to kiss Yoongi frantically. Then he fucked him in Yoongi’s bed, Yoongi on his hands and knees and Hoseok’s hands everywhere.They hooked up twice after that, but both of those times were brief, they didn’t go out before or after, but they stayed in Yoongi’s hotel room and talked.“Hyung,” Namjoon said, bringing Yoongi back to the present. “You’re totally dating him, you do realize that, right?”“No, I’m not.”“You guys text and call each other all the time, so you aren’t just meeting up to fuck,” Namjoon said and leaned back in his chair like he’d just solved the biggest mystery in the world. “You like him. You like, like him.”“Fuck you, we aren’t thirteen.”“I’m just saying, if you did like him, there’s nothing wrong with that. Just because it’s soon doesn’t mean anything. You can move on at any pace.”Yoongi sighed and fiddled with the edge of his menu. “I guess so, but we really aren’t a couple.”“Do you want to be?”That was a good question. Yoongi wasn’t sure if he did or not. In theory, Hoseok was nice and fun to be around and the sex was good, so yeah, he wouldn’t mind dating him. Exclusively though? Not that Yoongi had been with anyone else, but he wasn’t sure if Hoseok had. He wasn’t sure if Hoseok would want to be and the fear of rejection was overwhelming.Honestly, fuck Seokjin and his stupid car for breaking down in Gawngju and making things ten times for complicated than they needed to be. Min Yoongi sucked at feelings. He had plenty of them, loads of them, but he knew he was shit sometimes when it came to expressing them.So yeah, he liked Hoseok, but he didn’t know how to convey that to him.“It’s too early for me to say anything…” Yoongi said to Namjoon.At that, Namjoon’s face fell slightly and he shook his head. “It’s never too early, hyung,” he said softly. “Because, if you wait too long then it’ll be too late. And once it becomes too late, someone is bound to get hurt.”~*~“Fucking fuck this to the fucking moon and back!” Jungkook yelled as he pressed buttons on his controller. Yoongi glanced up with wide eyes from his phone to look at the television screen, where it appeared Jungkook’s game was glitching, judging by the fractured picture on the screen.“Dude,” Taehyung said from the kitchen. “Chill out.”“Your stupid TV sucks, hyung!” Jungkook complained. “We need a new one.”“You need to stop picking up Yoongi’s cursing habit. It’s unattractive.”“Yah!” Yoongi glared at Taehyung who smiled at him.“Just kidding, Jungkook, everything you do is attractive.” Jungkook blushed and turned back to the TV. Taehyung joined them on the couch and slung his arms around both their shoulders, causing Yoongi to nearly drop his phone. “So,” Taehyung said. “Jungkook, your birthday is approaching, is it not?”“Stop talking like a nobleman from the eighteen hundreds, hyung,” Jungkook said.“Whatever. So, your birthday. You’re gonna be twenty-one!” Taehyung’s voice changed, got more excited. “I was gonna throw you a surprise party, but I figured you’d rather help me prepare it. Other than that, though, you seriously need to get laid.”“Why am I a part of this conversation?” Yoongi asked.“Because, all you do is get laid,” Taehyung said. “You and that Hoseok guy are still fucking right? Give Jungkook some tips. How did you seduce him?”“I didn’t, he just came up to me and we talked,” Yoongi muttered.“I don’t want to hook up with some random person,” Jungkook said.“Yeah, he has a crush on someone,” Yoongi said distantly as he texted a response to Hoseok.“What?” Taehyung asked softly. “Really? Who?”“N-No one,” Jungkook shrugged Taehyung’s arm off him. “I’m going to go to the store, do we need anything?”Yoongi tuned them out while they discussed what they needed from the store. Once Jungkook was gone, Taehyung turned to Yoongi. “Who does he like? Please tell me it isn’t Jin hyung.”“What?” Yoongi asked. “Gross, no, why would you think that?”“Because they hang out a lot, but I always figured it was a brotherly thing. I…he really likes someone?”“I think so, yes,” Yoongi nodded. “But you’ll have to get him to tell you who.” Taehyung groaned and leaned back on the couch. “Look, I’ve gotta work on my paper for work saying why I deserve to get an actual job there because apparently they think we’re still in high school.”“You should invite Hoseok to Jungkook’s birthday party,” Taehyung said when Yoongi stood up. “When’re you seeing him again?”Yoongi shrugged, patted Taehyung on the shoulder, and left his apartment without giving him an answer. When he got back to his own apartment he sat down at his desk in front of his laptop. His desk calendar stared back at him. Nearly four months since his breakup with Seokjin. Surprisingly, Yoongi felt okay about it. Content.He didn’t miss dating Seokjin at all. Perhaps he missed some things about him, like the friendship aspects, but…Buzzzz. Buzzzz.Yoongi glanced at his phone and smiled before picking up.“Hey,” he said.“Question,” Hoseok said, “You have an older sibling, right?”“Uh,” Yoongi typed in his computer password. “Yeah, older brother, why?”“How do I get my sister to let me live my life and stop being so nosey?” Hoseok asked. In the background, Yoongi heard a toilet flush.“Are you in the bathroom?”“Uh, yeah, I’m with my sister, I mean, I’m not with her right now, obviously. Gross. We’re having lunch. She’s being annoying so I escaped in here and called you instead. Come save me?” Hoseok asked, his voice taking on a whiny, dramatic quality.“Oh yes, let me just drop everything and come to Gwangju right now and help you get out of lunch with your sister,” Yoongi said sarcastically.“You drop everything so we can fuck, what’s the difference? Do you care so little of me that you would just let me suffer this way? After I stuck my dick in you and—” Hoseok cut off for a moment. “Oh, no man, I’m not using this stall,” Yoongi heard him mumble. “Yeah, yeah , no, it’s cool, uh, sorry.”Yoongi laughed. “Smooth, Hoseokie.”“Yoongs,” Hoseok said. “Why does my sister have to care so much?”“Well, I can’t relate, I haven’t spoken to my brother since I came out…”“Oh, fuck,” Hoseok cursed. “Wow, I’m a shitty person. I’m sorry.”“It’s fine,” Yoongi said. “Since I can’t come there now, how about I come next week? I have to turn in something for work, then all the interns have a week off before we find out if we got a permanent position or not. So, if you want, I can come there then. There’s a new movie out, you said you like romcoms right? We could go see it?”“Yes!” Hoseok said. “Yes, I want to see you. I would come there, but I don’t think your friend liked me.”“No, he’s just weird, he liked you fine,” Yoongi said passively. “I want to see you, too. I, uh, miss you.”Hoseok was quiet for a few long moments. “I miss you, too,” he finally said. “Look, I’ve gotta go back to our table, my sister just saw me lingering outside the bathrooms and she’s giving me a death stare, But, uh, when I see you…when we see each other, maybe we…maybe we could talk about something?”“Talk about what?”“Something,” Hoseok repeated. “I like you, Yoongi.”“Okay,” Yoongi said, dumbly, mentally slapping himself. Hoseok, however, just chuckled.“Okay yourself. I’ll talk to you later, hyung. Have a good afternoon.”“Yeah, uh, you too?”The line went dead and Yoongi gingerly set his phone on the desk. When people said ‘can we talk’ or any variation of that, it instantly put Yoongi on edge. It probably put everyone on edge. However, knowing that Hoseok wanted to talk about something…didn’t make Yoongi nervous. Maybe it made him feel anticipation, but that wasn’t the same thing.When it came to Hoseok, Yoongi wasn’t afraid of what the future might hold.It didn’t matter that Taehyung continued to bother Yoongi about Hoseok, telling him he needed to be careful (the complete opposite of Namjoon’s encouragement). But his week off came, and Yoongi thoroughly ignored Taehyung’s prodding, which wasn’t hard, because if he mentioned Jungkook’s crush, Taehyung forgot all about Hoseok.The night before Yoongi was going to go to Gwangju, his little hotel room booked, he was changing the dangly earring he had on back to the normal hoops he usually wore, when he noticed a singular earring that he’d had since he’d first gotten them pierced. It dangled too, and at the end of it was a little music note.And maybe it would be weird to give Hoseok something, but Yoongi pried the little charm off the rest of the earring anyway, until it was by itself. Yoongi noticed Hoseok wore a silver bracelet sometimes, or a necklace, and maybe he could put the music note on one of those things.Or maybe Yoongi would chicken out and not give it to him at all. But, he slipped the little charm into his bag anyway and went to sleep with happy butterflies in his stomach.~*~Yoongi stayed in a different hotel than he had any other time before. He and Hoseok had considered staying at the casino, but Hoseok had made some flippant comment about not wanting to see his friend Jimin. So, Yoongi was in a slightly different part of Gwangju than before. Maybe it was closer to where Hoseok actually lived (because Yoongi was curious to see Hoseok’s place).For the time being, though, Yoongi was walking down the street to find the movie theater that Hoseok had given him directions to. The music note charm weighed heavy in his pocket.Hoseok: you finding your way okay?Yoongi: I’m on my way nowHoseok: cool im already here I got our tickets contemplating if I want candy or popcornYoongi: stop fuckin paying for meHoseok: ummmm you pay gas to get here and your hotel room I feel like shit that you have to do that so shush and let me pay :)Yoongi: >:(Yoongi was smiling, though, not frowning. Before he knew it, the movie theater was looming over him, so he slipped inside and looked around. There were lots of teenagers milling around, and a few older people. Big screens played movie trailers above the snack counter and a little game room off the side sent loud sounds and flashing lights out into the rest of the space.His phone buzzed again.Hoseok: you look,,,, really goodYoongi spun around to see Hoseok standing near the door, wearing a snapback and a tank top with shorts, which made him look like a total douchebag, but was also kind of hot. So, Yoongi told him. “You look like a douchebag. It’s hot.”Hoseok laughed and pushed off the wall, slipping his hand into Yoongi’s back pocket effortlessly. “You got here okay?”“Yep,” Yoongi nodded. “And I’m about to watch a romcom with you. That’s unprecedented.”Hoseok grinned and then made a weird face before taking his hand from Yoongi’s pocket.Oh, shit.“What’s this?” Hoseok looked at the little charm.“Uh, I—I didn’t buy it—It’s…for you? I guess. I thought…you could put it on your necklace or something. You know for—musically inclined,” Yoongi stammered awkwardly. For a moment, Hoseok looked unsure and Yoongi thought he was about to laugh at him, tell him that he’d been reading everything all wrong. Except, that didn’t happen. Instead, Hoseok leaned forward and kissed Yoongi, right there out in the open.“It’s perfect. Thank you, Yoongi,” Hoseok said softly, taking Yoongi’s hand in his free one. “I wish I had gotten you something. I didn’t…I was going to ask you if you wanted to be exclusive, but…I didn’t…there’s something I need to—”“Yes,” Yoongi nodded quickly. “I, uh, would want that.”Hoseok frowned then, though, and his hand closed around the little charm. “I want it too, it’s just—”“Hoseok?” An unfamiliar voice cut through their moment, and Hoseok instantly dropped Yoongi’s hand and shoved the charm into his pocket. Yoongi turned around to see a small, older woman walking over to them. “Oh! It is you!” she exclaimed and touched Hoseok’s arm politely. “I haven’t seen you in so long, how are you?”Hoseok’s face was flushed, and he looked nervous, all big eyes and tightly closed lips. “I’m good,” he croaked. “How’re you Mrs. Lee?”“I’m great, sweetheart,” the woman said. “You look very handsome, it’s been a while, but I would recognize your face anywhere!”“Oh, well, yeah…my face is kinda the same,” Hoseok said awkwardly. His gaze flickered over to Yoongi, who was silently watching the exchange.“How is Chin Sun?” the woman, presumably Mrs. Lee, asked. Yoongi felt Hoseok stiffen.“She’s, uh, fine,” he said.The woman turned to Yoongi, then. “Who’s this?” she asked with a smile.“Oh,” Hoseok looked at Yoongi. “This is Min Yoongi,” Hoseok said quickly. “We were just going to see a movie.”“Ah, I don’t think we’ve ever met,” Mrs. Lee said. “But if you’re friends with Hoseok then you must be a nice boy.” Yoongi nodded awkwardly. “Well, you boys have fun, next time you visit home, you should come say hi.”Hoseok agreed, and watched the woman walk away. Once she was gone, Hoseok let out a long breath of relief.“Who was that?” Yoongi asked.“She was my neighbor growing up,” Hoseok explained. He started walking towards the snack bar and Yoongi scrambled after him. “Sorry about how I introduced you, but, you know how old people are. She never knew I was bisexual, so I don’t think she would have reacted well about my dicking you down.”“Wow, well she didn’t ask if we were fucking,” Yoongi said with a nervous chuckle. He hadn’t known Hoseok was into girls too, never thought to ask. But it was fine, Yoongi didn’t have a problem with it.Hoseok sighed and rubbed his eyes. “I know. It just caught me off guard. I didn’t expect to see anyone I knew.”Are you ashamed to be seen with me? Yoongi wanted to ask. Instead, he asked, “Who’s Chin Sun? Is that your sister?”Hoseok grunted and jerked his head up and down. “Yeah,” he said quickly. “Do you want popcorn or candy? I like gummies. Do you like gummies?”“Gummies are fine,” Yoongi nodded.Hoseok quickly picked out a box and paid for them, and then headed towards the hallway with the entrances to the theaters. “Wanna sit at the back?” Hoseok suggested. “We can kiss.”“Are you alright?” Yoongi asked, grabbing Hoseok by the wrist so he would slow down. “I understand if you felt weird telling that lady we were seeing each other, but it seems weirder than that. Are you not wanting…do you not want to be exclusive? I mean, we don’t even have to call it dating, Hoseokie. Really, I don’t want to make you anxious or uncomfortable.”“I’m not anxious,” Hoseok said lowly.“I’ve seen the way you chew your nails. I used to have real bad social anxiety. It’s okay. I understand,” Yoongi said carefully. “Just tell me if you’re uncomfortable, okay.”“I’m not uncomfortable with you,” Hoseok said. “Let’s go watch the movie and kiss in the back row.”Yoongi was about to protest further, but Hoseok took his hand, interlacing their fingers, and pulled him into the theater. They got seats in the back and Hoseok still didn’t let go of Yoongi’s hand, even after they sat down. In fact, he only let go of his hand once, to open the box of candy.The movie wasn’t that great, but Hoseok’s lips on Yoongi’s neck were, so it made up for it. Even with that, though, Yoongi felt a nagging feeling in his gut about the interaction with the lady. It got worse when Hoseok casually put his hands in his own pockets when they left the theater, so Yoongi was unable to take his hand. Things were, for the first time between them, tense.“Do you want to do anything else?” Yoongi asked softly while they walked.“How long are you staying?”“I can stay all week, if I want to,” Yoongi said.Hoseok nodded and then stopped and looked around. The sidewalk was pretty deserted and there were only a few other people milling around. “I can tell you still think I’m, like, uncomfortable with being seen with you. I’m not, okay?” Hoseok said. “I’m not ashamed that I like men. I’ve been out to my family since I was thirteen. Hell, Yoongi, I’m lucky to be seen with you, you’re…” Hoseok trailed off and gestured at Yoongi, who looked down at himself, dressed in faded jeans and a dark blue striped T-shirt. “You’re great, okay?”“Thanks?”“I haven’t dated anyone since I was…nineteen,” Hoseok said thoughtfully. “I know you probably think I sat there at that casino every night and looked for someone to hook up with, but I really didn’t. I was that night, when I saw you, but it was a onetime thing and I certainly didn’t expect to like you so much,” Hoseok continued with a small smile. “So please don’t think that I’m ashamed of you.”“Okay, I don’t think that,” Yoongi nodded. “But, just so you know, I’m super not-straight and don’t give a shit if old ladies know it. I only didn’t say anything because it isn’t my place. But if we kissed and some random old person gave us dirty looks, I’d flip them off.”“Good to know,” Hoseok said with a laugh.“I’m shit at dating too, me and Seokjin were practically a gross married couple who didn’t do anything fun,” Yoongi stated. Hoseok grimaced and looked down at his shoes. “Let’s not be that. I mean…not that we’re that serious right now, and…I just…fuck, okay I’m gonna shut up.”“You’re cute,” Hoseok said softly, and tilted Yoongi’s head up to plant a chaste kiss on his lips. “Let’s go back to your hotel.”Yoongi was about to ask why they didn’t go back to Hoseok’s place, and he almost even asked why he couldn’t stay at Hoseok’s place. They’d known each other for four months and it wouldn’t be weird for Yoongi to stay with Hoseok for a few days (especially considering their relationship was based on sex, initially), but Hoseok didn’t offer and Yoongi didn’t want to invite himself. Hoseok might have had a roommate or something.Which meant, Yoongi’s hotel room it was.There, Hoseok and Yoongi stripped out of their clothes, and when they were both naked, still standing in the middle of the room, Hoseok pulled Yoongi flush against him. He didn’t say anything, just touched. Yoongi shivered at the feeling of Hoseok’s hands skimming his back and his lips against his neck.Eventually, they made their way to the bed, and Hoseok had his hand down between Yoongi’s legs, lubed up and pressing inside. Yoongi arched and grabbed at Hoseok’s ass, unintentionally ending up close to where he could easily slip his finger inside Hoseok.Hoseok gasped against Yoongi’s lips and kissed him hard while groping around on the bed something. For the lube, specifically.“Finger me,” Hoseok said.“Oh, uh,” Yoongi took the bottle and blinked hazily up at Hoseok. “You sure?”“Yeah, fingerfuck me while I fuck you.”“Have you ever…” Yoongi trailed off, squeezed some lube onto his hands, and reached behind Hoseok.“I mean, to myself,” Hoseok said with a shrug. “I admittedly stuck a dildo up my ass once, but I didn’t get very far and chickened out.”Yoongi chewed his bottom lip to suppress a laugh. “Okay,” he said, drawing out the word. “That’s a visual.” Yoongi poked his tongue out and smiled.Hoseok groaned and leaned down to suck Yoongi’s tongue into his mouth. “Your mouth should be fucking illegal,” Hoseok mumbled. “Your lips are so fucking pink and pretty, baby, I just…god, Yoongi. I think about you all the time. I think about this all the time.”The confession jostled something in Yoongi, and he instantly circled Hoseok’s rim with his pointer finger while Hoseok continued to finger him, too, until Yoongi had to tell him to stop or else he’d come. Especially with the way he was one finger deep in Hoseok, who was tight and clenching around his finger.“Fuck me now,” Yoongi said urgently, starting to push his second finger inside Hoseok.“You want it?”“Yeah. Yes, I want it.”Hoseok groaned and shifted around while Yoongi bent his legs. His arm was stretched somewhat uncomfortably with how he tried to stay inside Hoseok, but they managed, and Hoseok pushed inside him at the same time Yoongi got his second finger in Hoseok.“Jesus, you’re so good for me,” Hoseok moaned.“I’m not—ah—Jesus.”“Uhg, shut the fuck up,” Hoseok muttered. Somehow, Hoseok interlaced his fingers with Yoongi’s on Yoongi’s free hand. Somehow, Yoongi found Hoseok’s prostate, and it made both of them let out long sighs of pleasure. “Fuck, fuck,” Hoseok cursed when Yoongi hit it again. Every time, it made Hoseok’s hips jerk forward faster, until they were fucking each other at the same rhythmic pace. Yoongi could only imagine that Hoseok probably felt really fucking good.“Come in me,” Yoongi blurted out suddenly.“Huh?” Hoseok’s eyes flew open, wide and uncertain.“You forgot—we forgot the condom, but it’s fine. Come in me.”“Yoongi,” Hoseok warned, his pace slowing and Yoongi’s hands stilling. “I—shit, fuck, we forgot the condom. I’m sorry. I didn’t—”“Shut up,” Yoongi hissed. “It’s fine.” Hoseok scanned his face. “If you don’t want then fine, but it’s okay. You can.” Hoseok ground his teeth together. Yoongi curled his fingers inside Hoseok just the tiniest bit. “Hoseok. Hoseok, come on, come in me,” Yoongi repeated, raising his hips up.Hoseok grunted and reached behind him, pulling Yoongi’s fingers out and pinning his hand above his head before he continued to roll his hips, slow drags that let Yoongi feel everything, until finally, he let Yoongi’s hands go and jerked Yoongi off until he came with a whine of Hoseok’s name, his release spurting hard up across his chest.“Please,” Yoongi begged, lost in some kind of desperate headspace he didn’t recognize. “Please come in me, fill me up, Hoseok-ah.”Hoseok shuddered above him while Yoongi continued to whine and rock against Hoseok’s thrusts. Yoongi could tell Hoseok was close, could feel his cock throbbing inside him, but then, like a splash of cold water, Hoseok pulled out, straddled Yoongi’s hips, and pumped himself until he came.For a long time, or at least, what seemed like a long time, Hoseok sat back on his heels, breathing hard, while Yoongi stared up at the ceiling. The come on his body felt sticky, but he didn’t want to move. Hoseok was maybe looking at him, but Yoongi wouldn’t look back.“I—sorry,” Hoseok murmured. “That was shitty of me to forget—”“I forgot too. ’S fine.”“I just think we should talk about…that…before doing it, and not just do it because it sounds hot, you know?”“Sorry,” Yoongi said quietly.“Don’t apologize,” Hoseok said quickly. “Hey, look at me.” Yoongi did, reluctantly. “I would, uh, love to, as you said, ‘fill you up’, but…but we…”“I know, I shouldn’t have pushed you like that,” Yoongi said.“I mean, it was hot though,” Hoseok offered lamely, a crooked smile on his face. Yoongi forced out a breathless laugh and closed his eyes. “I just,” Hoseok continued, “I don’t really know what I’m doing, I told you that. I don’t really know what we’re doing.”“What do you want to do?” Yoongi muttered. Talking about feelings wasn’t his favorite thing ever, but he and Seokjin apparently hadn’t talked about their feelings enough. They just ignored it all. He didn’t want to do that with Hoseok. “I suck balls at this, Hoseok,” Yoongi said.Hoseok laughed and scooted a little closer to Yoongi. “You always do that,” he said softly. “You always say suck ass, or suck dick, or suck balls instead of just suck. It’s funny.” Yoongi grunted and sat up. “Okay, um, so, yes, officially, I would like to date you,” Hoseok said quickly, before Yoongi could slip out of the bed.“So…we’re exclusive and dating?” Yoongi asked carefully.“Yes, if you want.”“Sure,” Yoongi nodded, which made Hoseok roll his eyes.“Wow, hyung, you’re such a flatterer.”Yoongi blushed and looked away, towards the bathroom. “Well, you have a nice butt, too, I guess,” Yoongi said. “And your lip mole is cute. Is that enough flattering?”“For now,” Hoseok nodded and shuffled over to Yoongi, put his arms around Yoongi, and kissed him, but only for about two seconds before he pulled away with a scrunched up face. “You’re gross. Shower?”Yoongi agreed, even though that wasn’t something they’d done before, but Hoseok seemed to be chill about, so Yoongi tried to be chill about it, too. While the water heated up in the stand-only shower, Hoseok moved around the bathroom, swaying his hips to some music Yoongi supposed only he could hear.“Do you think next time…” Yoongi murmured, then stopped.“Next time what?”“Nothing. Never mind. The water is warm.”They stepped under the stream, and Yoongi let Hoseok lather his hair up with shampoo that smelled like coconuts. The way Hoseok carefully smoothed his hands over Yoongi’s body made Yoongi shiver, but it also made him feel cared for, somehow beautiful, and happy.When he turned to rinse his face, Hoseok draped his hands over Yoongi and rested his forehead on his shoulder. “I wish we had met sooner,” Hoseok whispered. “Being with you feels right.”After their shower, they lounged around for a while before Hoseok said he should go. Yoongi watched him get properly dressed, watched him take the little music note out of his pocket and slide it onto his necklace, and watched the big smile and boisterous laugh that escaped Hoseok’s throat. He looked happy.Yoongi felt happy.But he also felt…kind of off. There was something about the way Hoseok had clung to him in the shower. There was something about the look on his face when that lady had come up to them. There was something about how Yoongi had never met any of Hoseok’s other friends, besides Jimin, the one time.But maybe they just weren’t there yet.Everything was fine. Probably.~*~Yoongi: I got the job!!Hoseok: congrats Yoongi! im so happy for youYoongi: Yeah, I mean I’m an assistant to one of the producers right now Which isn’t ideal but The guy is nice enough He actually asks for my opinionsHoseok: they’ll see how good your writing is and youll get promoted I mean idk how all that works but yeah so…the guy you work for is he cute?Yoongi: Lmao no He’s old Nowhere near as cute as youHoseok: :) hey you should let me read some of the songs you write sometimeYoongi: maybe“Stop texting your man and pay attention to us,” Taehyung said. Yoongi looked over at his friends. Taehyung was shoveling chocolate candies in his mouth while Jungkook sat at the kitchen table drawing something or another.“You guys aren’t doing anything interesting.”“Well, yeah, but you were gone for several days and then you moped around your apartment for like a week after that because the people hadn’t called you about the job, and then you got busy with the new job for three more days. We haven’t seen you. Seokjin came by yesterday and asked about you, ya know? He was like ‘Taehyung, my dear, how is Yoongi?’,” Tae said.“He did not say that,” Jungkook piped up. “He just asked if you were doing good. We told him you were dating someone new.”“What? Why?” Yoongi asked.“Because, my birthday is coming up and you’re coming and he’s coming and your Hoseok guy is coming, so he’s gonna know anyway,” Jungkook explained.“No,” Yoongi shook his head. “I’m not going if Seokjin is going.”Taehyung groaned loudly. “You can’t avoid him forever. Besides, I saw Hoseok, he’s hot. Show him off.”“I thought you didn’t like him,” Yoongi said. He turned around on the couch so he could better face his friends. The truth was that he wanted to bring Hoseok to Jungkook’s birthday party. It might be fun, and he might even consider dancing, if he could do it with Hoseok. And, the prospect of seeing Seokjin wasn’t all that terrifying. He’d really just said he didn’t want to see him on impulse.“It’s not that I don’t like him,” Taehyung said thoughtfully. “It’s just that I don’t trust him. Not to be weird, but I kind of looked him up online, and I couldn’t find a single social media page. It’s weird. He’s a ghost.”“Really? I didn’t even do that,” Yoongi murmured.“Dude, that’s like the first thing you’re supposed to do,” Jungkook chuckled.Yoongi groaned and looked back down at his phone. “I’ll ask him if he has any. I wonder if he’s looked me up. I use Instagram.”“Yeah, like twice a year. The last time you posted was seven months ago,” Taehyung said. “You never like my pictures.”Yoongi ignored him.Yoongi: Hey I was wondering if you had any social media So I could follow you and idk like your pictures and stuff?Hoseok: oh, I don’t have any social mediaYoongi: Really?Hoseok: reallyYoongi: Not even any videos when you used to dance?Hoseok: nah those were just on my phone, not onlineYoongi: Oh, well ok thenHoseok: sorry babyYoongi: Don’t call me thatHoseok: baby baby baby BABY bAbYYoongi: You suckHoseok: what do I suck?Yoongi: Everything. … I miss youHoseok: Me or my sock fUCK *sock WHAT THE HELL c o c kYoongi: Ummm neither, nowHoseok: me and my sock are crying WHAT THE FUCK autocorrect is a prude“Gross,” Taehyung said. Yoongi jerked and turned around to glare. “Invite him to the party. Stop sexting in my apartment. There are children here.”“Yeah, children,” Jungkook said and pointed to himself.“I’m leaving,” Yoongi muttered. “Don’t stay up too late playing video games.”“Okay, Dad,” Taehyung joked.Yoongi rolled his eyes, but when he was in the hallway, he heard Jungkook say, “Do you think hyung has a kink for that? He left awfully quick.” Then Taehyung started yelling intelligibly.~*~About five months into the Thing with Hoseok, a week before Jungkook’s birthday, Yoongi got another sign that something was…off.It started one Wednesday afternoon while Yoongi was at work, sitting behind a cubicle with nothing to do. He’d already finished his lunch (which was nowhere near as good as the lunches Seokjin used to make him at the start of their relationship, but Yoongi was fairly sure anything Seokjin made him now would just taste like deceit) and was mostly fiddling around on his phone. Taehyung had texted about five times reminding Yoongi to get Jungkook a birthday gift and to invite Hoseok to the party.Namjoon texted a few times too, complaining about his new position at his family company and jokingly asking Yoongi if the label was still taking interns.Someone Yoongi hadn’t heard from was Hoseok.Yoongi had texted him that morning, but hadn’t heard back from him. In fact, he hadn’t really talked to him much the day before either. Not that they talked constantly, but they usually talked at least for a few minutes every day, whether by text or phone call. Maybe Hoseok was busy at work, but it was lunch time, so Yoongi hesitantly dialed Hoseok’s number (Yoongi was good at memorizing numbers, it wasn’t weird. Really. It wasn’t.)The line rang four times, and Yoongi sighed, leaning his head in his hands. Just when he was certain no one would answer, the ringing stopped. No one said anything though, but Yoongi could hear soft breathing.“Hello?” he said uncertainly. “Hobi?”“Hello?” a voice replied, a little bit harsh and a little bit rude. Not to mention, undeniably feminine.“Um,” Yoongi said uncertainly. “Is…is Hoseok there?”“Who is this?” the female voice asked sharply.“Who is this?” Yoongi returned.More silence.“Perhaps you shouldn’t call this number again,” the woman said.“Wait, I—”And then, with a click, the line went dead. Yoongi lowered his phone from his ear and stared at the screen. He was fairly certain he had dialed the number correctly, but maybe he hadn’t. Maybe he’d called a wrong number.So, he scrolled back through his contacts until he got to Hoseok’s, and after a moment’s hesitation, hit the call button.Again, the line rang several times before it stopped, indicating that someone had picked up. That’s when things got kind of strange.The first thing Yoongi heard, rather than a hello, was, “No!” but it didn’t seem to have been directed into the phone, more like someone speaking to someone else in the room. “Don’t answer my calls!” the same voice, Hoseok’s voice, said.Yoongi could hear someone else say something in the background, but he couldn’t make out what it was.“Hoseok?” Yoongi asked.“Yoongi?”“Yeah. Sorry, are you…are you busy? I didn’t mean to bother you if you’re at work.”“I’m not at work,” Hoseok said shortly. “Aren’t you, though?”“Lunch break. I was bored. I wanted to talk to you,” Yoongi said. He leaned back in his chair. “Did someone else answer your phone a second ago or did I call the wrong number?”“Fuck, she did answer my phone,” Hoseok muttered. “Yeah, uh, what did she say?”“Nothing, just that I shouldn’t call again? Was it your sister?”Hoseok was quiet, let out a long breath of air, and said, finally, “Yeah, my sister. She, uh, she’s protective.”“Maybe I should meet her, then she’ll know that I’m just a big softie.”“Small softie,” Hoseok said halfheartedly. “But it wouldn’t matter, Dawon is hard on everyone.”“Hmm,” Yoongi hummed. “Well, I’m good at winning people over. I’m so cute people can’t resist me. I think we have that in common, also.”“Maybe,” Hoseok murmured. “Listen, Yoongi, baby, I—” Hoseok cut off again suddenly. For about five seconds, the line was quiet and Yoongi pulled his phone away from his ear to make sure Hoseok hadn’t accidentally hung up on him. He hadn’t. “No, I’m tired of this, I want to talk to my friend, okay? It’s not fucking—I can’t! No!”Yoongi flinched at the strain in Hoseok’s voice, the underlying sadness. “Hobi? Are you okay?”“I’m sorry, I have to go,” Hoseok said quickly.“Okay, text me later, I want to know you’re okay, so—”Beeeeeep.Yoongi lowered his phone again and pushed it across the cubicle desk. So Hoseok was arguing with his sister. Yoongi used to argue with his brother all the time, that was normal.It would have all been fine, if Yoongi didn’t have one nagging thought in the back of his head.Maybe Hoseok had more than one sister, he had to, because, Yoongi was almost positive Hoseok had said his sister’s name was Chin Sun, but just then, he said his sister’s name was Dawon.Still, Yoongi pushed it aside. He pushed it aside in the same way he’d pushed aside the problems he’d had with Seokjin. It was just easier that way, because, as they say, ignorance is bliss.~*~Yoongi: Hey so I hope you’re okay but Taehyung keeps bothering me he wants me to invite you to Jungkook’s birthday it’s this weekend so…it would be cool if you could comeHoseok: im okay its just been a long day I wish I could call you talking to you makes me feel less nervous… less wound up, you know? but I have shit to do so I cant :(Yoongi: Its ok What about the party??Hoseok: oh um im really sorry I don’t think I could make it I will make it up to you, somehow im so sorry~*~Jungkook was typically the more reserved one in the friend group. Taehyung wasn’t wild, either, and he was actually pretty shy around people he didn’t know very well, claiming he wasn’t so good with words. Still, both of them were more well versed with being social than Yoongi was. Which was why they were making their way around their apartment, greeting all the guests crammed inside, while Yoongi stuck to the wall, his eyes trained on the door. He wanted to know exactly when Seokjin showed up, so he wouldn’t be caught off guard.It had been five months, and Yoongi had managed to avoid his ex completely. He wondered if he would look the same. Yoongi did, still with dark hair a slight, soft figure. Jin, though, all tall with his brown hair, could have…well he could look better. Yoongi wasn’t sure if Jin was seeing the person he’d cheated on Yoongi with. If he would bring them.That would be humiliating, Yoongi thought, especially since Hoseok didn’t come.All in all, Yoongi was not having a very good time at the party. He didn’t know anyone there other than Taehyung and Jungkook. Namjoon wasn’t coming, it seemed, as he had stopped by earlier in the day to wish Jungkook a happy birthday and to drop off a gift. The other guests were friends of Jungkook’s, who were too young for Yoongi to be properly friends with. There were too many of them, too, and Yoongi really just wanted to go back to his own apartment.The music that was playing wasn’t even good.Yoongi stood on his tip toes to try and locate the speaker, and in the process, he noticed someone else on their tip toes, too, scanning the crowd. They had faded pink hair, and were a little bit shorter than Yoongi was, and they looked oddly familiar.After taking a step closer, the pink-haired kid met Yoongi’s eyes, gave him an odd look, and then his lips parted slightly in surprise.Okay, so he recognizes me, Yoongi thought.“Hi,” the pink-haired kid said from where he stood, a few feet away.Yoongi pushed off the wall and walked over to him, now positioned so that his back was to the door. “Um, how do we—” he began, but it suddenly clicked, since he was closer and able to properly make out the kid’s features. “Oh. Jimin, right?”“Yeah. Park. Park Jimin. You’re Yoongi, right?” Jimin asked. His tone held an underlying sense of judgement that Yoongi didn’t understand.“Yeah. Hoseok, um, didn’t send you right?”“No,” Jimin shook his head. “I actually haven’t spoken to Hoseok in a while. I grew up near Jungkook, in Busan, and…yeah. I didn’t realize you knew him, also.”“Oh, well, cool,” Yoongi shrugged awkwardly.“I guess you’re still talking to Hoseok? I didn’t know.”“Yeah, uh, I think we’re kind of dating now? I mean, I don’t know if he’s…my boyfriend, but…I like him a lot,” Yoongi explained, his voice rising to be heard over the music.“Seriously? Dating?” Jimin asked. But rather than sounding pleasantly surprised, he sounded more irritated.“Yes?”“So how does that work?” Jimin asked. He crossed his arms and shifted his weight.“Well, we visit each other? I know long distance is kind of weird, but it’s not that far.”Jimin’s expression softened slightly. “Wait. That isn’t what I meant. You don’t—he never said?”“Said what?”“Yoongi, he’s—”“Yoongi?”Jimin stopped speaking, and Yoongi tensed. That was Seokjin’s voice. Without a doubt. Fuck.And then a hand was on Yoongi’s shoulder, and he had no other choice but to turn around. Seokjin seemed to tower over Yoongi, but he looked the same. He was dressed simply, in a white sweater and jeans, and for the most part, he looked content.“I’ll leave you guys to it,” Jimin murmured, clearly not understanding what was going on, or maybe not caring.“Hi,” Seokjin said with a small smile. “It’s been a while.”“Yeah, well…” Yoongi trailed off.“I know you probably aren’t thrilled about seeing me, but I was wondering if we could talk. Just, as friends,” Seokjin suggested.“Don’t you need to go say hi to Jungkook?”Seokjin looked over Yoongi’s shoulder. “He’s currently on the couch making out with Taehyung, so I think it may be best not to bother them at the moment. You know, since we have all been waiting for them to kiss for months.”Yoongi’s mouth fell open, and he tried to turn around to see, but Seokjin took his arm lightly and gestured towards the door. Fine. Yoongi would talk. “Ten minutes, tops,” Yoongi said firmly.“Okay, I can do ten minutes,” Seokjin agreed.They stepped out of the noisy apartment, and Yoongi leaned against the wall before sliding down to sit on the floor. Seokjin sat next to him and his head thudded against the wall.“So…” Yoongi said softly.“How are you?”“I’m fine.”“Me too.” Yoongi glanced over at Seokjin, who just smiled back. “Taehyung said you’re seeing someone?”“He lives in Gwangju,” Yoongi said. “Hoseok.”“Is it the guy you hooked up with at that hotel?”“Maybe,” Yoongi smirked. “He’s cute, you should’ve seem him. He makes me feel…more complete?”“Good. I’m glad you found someone. I can see it, on your face, you’re happy. Happier than you were with me. We never should have dated, you know? We both knew it, I think, around the six month mark, and we were just too stupid to admit it,” Seokjin said carefully. “But that doesn’t excuse what I did, either. I should have just ended things. I was just too scared to.”“Are you seeing the person?”“Uh,” Seokjin looked away from Yoongi to the wall across from them.“You can tell me,” Yoongi shrugged. “As long as it isn’t like, one of our friends,” he joked. “But you didn’t cheat on me with, I don’t know, Namjoon or somethin’ right?”Seokjin sputtered and shook his head. “N—No,” he said. “Of course not. No.”“Then, are you seeing the person, whoever they are.”“It’s—I can’t say, exactly.”“Complicated?”“Sort of,” Seokjin agreed. His face was flushed, and he fiddled with his hands in his lap. “Do you think we could somehow be friends, Yoongi?”“Maybe,” Yoongi answered. “I don’t know if I can right now, exactly, but…maybe one day.”“I’ll take that,” Seokjin whispered. They sat there for a moment in silence before Seokjin spoke again. “Do you love him? The new guy?”“It’s only been five months.”“So? Sometimes you just know,” Seokjin nudged Yoongi’s shoulder. “It took us over a year to say the words, and I think it was because we didn’t feel them, in that way. I loved you, sure, but…I’m not sure we were ever In Love.”“I like him,” Yoongi said. “Whenever we get to see each other, I feel…brighter. I wish he lived closer so we could see each other more often.”“I’m not going to be That Guy who tells you how you feel, nor am I going to tell you to believe in fate but—”“If you tell me it was fate that I found about your cheating and that your car broke down so I would meet Hoseok, I’m going to fight you, right here, right now,” Yoongi deadpanned.“Alright, alright. I know you don’t believe in that kind of thing, but I do,” Seokjin said thoughtfully, almost dreamily. “I believe in soulmates. In fate. In meeting someone and just knowing that they’re the person for you.”“Then how do you explain us wasting so much time together?” Yoongi asked seriously.“I don’t know. I can’t explain it. I just know that there are people I wish I’d met at different times, but that doesn’t mean that things won’t work out. Maybe you and your new guy should have met sooner but you didn’t. You met when you met and you’ll figure it out.” Seokjin sighed. Music from in the apartment seeped out from under the door, a slower song that had lyrics Yoongi could actually appreciate. He hummed softly. “You still want to be a songwriter?”“Yes.”“I never…asked you about it all,” Seokjin said.“Well, the job at the label isn’t song writing, but it might get me in that door, somehow. One day. Or maybe it won’t. I don’t know,” Yoongi admitted.“I hope you can find what you’re looking for, somehow.” Yoongi felt Seokjin stand, after that, but Yoongi didn’t look up at him. He just stared at the hallway floor. “Are you coming back to the party?”“No…” Yoongi murmured. “No, I think I’ll just go home. Make sure Jungkook gets my gift, it’s in the white wrapping paper on the table with the others. I got him some new video game he wouldn’t shut up about.”“Alright,” Seokjin nodded. “I’ll see you around.”Yoongi nodded and glanced up just as Seokjin slipped back into Taehyung and Jungkook’s apartment. For a moment, the music was loud, and then it was muffled again when the door closed.Maybe everyone had been right, after all. Talking to Seokjin, finally, made Yoongi feel better, just a tiny bit. He felt freer. He felt like he knew how he felt about Hoseok, properly. Seokjin was right, sometimes you just knew.Yoongi knew. He knew when he first saw Hoseok in his all-black outfit with his big grin and blonde hair and goofy attempts at flirting.Yoongi knew when they’d gone out to eat together, and Hoseok put his hand on Yoongi’s back.Yoongi knew when he fell asleep in Hoseok’s arms.He knew when that weird old lady came and spoke to them and Hoseok had assured him that he wasn’t ashamed.But, was he?Yoongi was sure, but he wasn’t sure Hoseok was.~*~“So, how many times have you seen him since you’ve put off telling him you’re completely whipped?” Taehyung asked.“Like, four times? In person,” Yoongi said. “But, he seems to be having a hard time right now. He hates his job and—”“Then it’s an even better time to tell him! It’s been nearly seven months. And, if he’s sad, then I’m sure your gross love confession will cheer him up considerably!” Taehyung insisted.“Love confessions are not gross,” Jungkook said.“Not when they come from you,” Taehyung said and bumped shoulders with the younger boy. They were holding hands as they walked down the streets of Gwangju, and Yoongi trailed on next to them. Since Jungkook’s birthday, where Yoongi supposed the initial love confession took place, Taehyung and Jungkook had been doing lots of hand holding. Yoongi was happy for them.“It’s cold,” Yoongi muttered and pulled his dark coat tighter around himself.“Yeah, that happens in winter, hyung,” Jungkook said with a smirk. His nose was pink. “Are you gonna spend the holidays with Hoseok?”“I don’t know.”Jungkook rolled his eyes and tugged Taehyung ahead. Yoongi hadn’t planned on bringing his friends to Gwangju, but they begged to come, and Yoongi agreed, as long as they paid for their rooms and gas and food. They wanted to go to the infamous hotel and casino where Yoongi and Hoseok had met, so that’s where they were headed. Neither of them were properly staying in the hotel, but they did plan on eating dinner at the casino and Jungkook kept saying he wanted to gamble (which would have been a problem if we weren’t good at everything he did).“Is that it up there?” Taehyung asked, pointing at the hotel they were approaching. Yoongi just nodded, and the two younger boys sprinted ahead and disappeared inside. As Yoongi got closer, too, he realized that Hoseok was standing outside, but peering in through the window, probably at Taehyung and Jungkook.“Hey,” Yoongi said.Hoseok jumped and turned, a smile instantly gracing his features. “Were those your friends?”“They wanted to come,” Yoongi said. Hoseok was dressed in dark clothes again, a black fitted shirt and jeans with a leather jacket, along with his silver necklace, from which the music note charm hung. And, surprisingly, his hair wasn’t blonde anymore. It was dark, nearly black, while Yoongi’s was faded to a neutral brown. “When did you change your hair?”“Last week. Do you like it?”“Yeah, I’d probably still like you if you were bald, though,” Yoongi admitted. Hoseok just grinned wider, and then held something out. Yoongi didn’t even notice he was holding a little gift bag, too caught up in Hoseok himself. “What is this?”“Me making it up to you. For not going to that party. And for not being…for not being a good boyfriend,” Hoseok said, but he said the last part softly. It was the first time they’d ever referred to each other that way.“You—I—You didn’t have to get me anything,” Yoongi said. Still, Hoseok thrust the bag out.“Take it, hyung.”“Can we go inside, first, I’m freezing my balls off,” Yoongi complained, but he took the bag anyway. Hoseok flung his arms around Yoongi’s shoulders and led him inside. “Is Jimin working? I know I told you about seeing him at the party, did you guys make up?”“Jimin got accepted into a dance academy, so he doesn’t work here as often, only occasionally,” Hoseok said. “Mostly weekends.”“Oh.”“Yeah,” Hoseok murmured. “Let’s sit.”They found a table in the eating area, near the back. Taehyung and Jungkook had run off somewhere, and after they ordered food, Yoongi pulled the tissue paper out of the bag and peered inside. Hoseok’s leg was pressed against Yoongi’s and when Yoongi pulled a leather-bound book of some sort from the bag, Hoseok grabbed his free hand and intertwined their fingers.“Yoongi,” Hoseok said softly.“What is this?” Yoongi turned the book over and set it on the table so he could open it. It was a notebook, all blank lined paper, crisp and white.“You can write songs in it and stuff,” Hoseok said. Yoongi stared at the book, which looked expensive, as Hoseok leaned his head against Yoongi’s. “Do you like it?”“Of course I like it,” Yoongi said. “I just—I didn’t even pay for what I gave you.”“It’s okay,” Hoseok assured him. Yoongi squeezed his hand. “Yoongi?”“Hmm?”“Yoongi, I think I…” Hoseok trailed off. Yoongi felt his stomach twist up. He held Hoseok’s hand tighter. “I think I’m going to screw this up,” Hoseok finished. Yoongi’s stomach sank.“Why?”“Because, I don’t deserve you,” Hoseok said.Fuck that, Yoongi thought. But when he turned to look at Hoseok, he noticed something. The weirdly colored lights of the casino lit up Hoseok’s face, and on one cheek, Yoongi could see that Hoseok had put on makeup of some kind. Maybe just concealer, but it was still there.“Hobi, why’re you wearing makeup?” Yoongi asked slowly.Hoseok quickly jerked his hand out of Yoongi’s grasp. “I had a pimple,” he said, which made Yoongi instantly laugh.“No you don’t, your face is smooth. Hey, look at me,” Yoongi moved around in his chair and turned Hoseok’s face closer to his. “Did someone…did someone hit you?”“No! Why would you ask that?”“Because, you don’t have a pimple, that’s a lie, but maybe you were trying to cover up a bruise. Hoseok-ah. Tell me what’s wrong.”Worry started to bloom in Yoongi’s chest, a culmination of all the weird occurrences that surrounded Hoseok. Hoseok who was still, in some ways, a mystery. They called what they had a relationship, but Yoongi had never once been to Hoseok’s home. They still hooked up like it was some illicit affair they were having.While some aspects of what they had were perfect, other things weren’t. But Yoongi didn’t want to see what wasn’t perfect. He didn’t want to think it was weird that Hoseok didn’t have social media, or wouldn’t take him to his home. He didn’t want things with Hoseok to not be real, because every time he was with him, he wanted more, more, more.“Nothing is wrong,” Hoseok said. “Let’s eat and go home. Or. Go wherever. You know what I mean.”“Hobi.”“Don’t worry about me.”Yoongi fell silent, and their food arrived, so they ate. They ate and didn’t talk about it. They ate and didn’t talk about it, and then Yoongi gathered up his new notebook and Hoseok took his hand and they left the place they’d met at. They walked down the street, hand in hand, but Hoseok was frowning. Yoongi didn’t know what to do to fix it. He didn’t know if it was his fault.“It’s so cold,” Hoseok murmured when they approached the hotel Yoongi was staying at. Taehyung and Jungkook were staying there, too, but on a different floor.“What’re you doing for the holidays?” Yoongi asked.Hoseok took a deep breath. “I’m not sure yet.”“Oh.”“Will you go home?”“No, I’ll probably stay in Seoul.”“Hmm.”Then they were inside.Then they were in the hotel room.Then their jackets hit the floor.“Too tired to fuck you,” Hoseok said. And he did look tired. It made Yoongi’s heart hurt.“Lay down,” Yoongi said.Hoseok sighed and crawled onto the bed, flopped down onto his stomach and rolled over. Yoongi crawled on top of him and straddled his thighs. There was nothing sexy about the atmosphere in the room, but there was a certain vulnerability about it all.Hoseok’s eyes flickered to Yoongi while Yoongi untucked Hoseok’s shirt and unbuttoned his jeans. Yoongi pulled the zipper down and brought Hoseok’s dick out, his slender fingers wrapped around it. Hoseok wasn’t hard, not even a little bit, but he didn’t protest when Yoongi started stroking him, either.“Yoongi,” Hoseok said.“Do you want me to stop?”“I think I love you.”Yoongi maybe squeezed Hoseok’s dick too hard, because Hoseok suddenly dug his nails into Yoongi’s thighs.“What the fuck? You’re gonna tell me that while I’m touching your dick?” Yoongi asked.“I mean…yeah?” Hoseok offered. The sadness had faded slightly, replaced by uncertainty and a tiny smile. “I’ll touch yours too, if that makes it better.”“Shut up.”“Oh. Do you not…?”“Shut up,” Yoongi repeated.“I understand if you don’t,” Hoseok said. “I understand. I’ve been weird, there are things going on in my life, we live apart. If you want, I’ll take it back. I’ll super take it back and put my dick back in my pants and just leave, but you can keep the fancy notebook. Or, I can keep my dick out of my pants and stay, but still take it back. Whatever you want.”“Jung Hoseok. Shut up,” Yoongi said, one more time. “Tell me what happened to your face.”“Huh?”“Tell me.”“My dick is deflating. Can you see my dick deflating?”Yoongi rolled his eyes and scooted up on Hoseok’s lap and pulled Hoseok into a seated position. “Hobi. I love you, too.”“Oh.”“Tell me what’s wrong. Please,” Yoongi said, pressing their foreheads together.“I was maybe slapped. There’s a small bruise. But, it isn’t a big deal, I promise. I just…I said something to my sister and she slapped me, but it’s fine.”“Which one?”“What?”“Which sister?” Yoongi asked.“I only have—oh,” Hoseok cut off and shook his head. “Um. Older one,” he offered. “I called her a name. She didn’t mean it, it was just siblings fighting.”Yoongi breathed out. Okay. Everything was okay.He thought, maybe, that Hoseok still lived at home. Maybe that was why Hoseok wouldn’t bring him to his place. He thought maybe Hoseok wasn’t actually fully out to his parents, which was why he hardly mentioned them. He thought maybe, just maybe, it could be just the two of them against the world, one day. Maybe they would figure out that all they needed was each other.Even though that was unrealistic.“So, you love me, too?” Hoseok asked.“Yes.”“That’s good.”Yoongi laughed, Hoseok complimented his smile, and they kissed.They kissed and shifted around until they both laid on their back, where they proceeded to give each other hand jobs while they craned their necks to keep kissing.“I wanna come back with you,” Hoseok said when it was all said and done. “I wish I could. I wish we could run away or some shit.”“My bags are packed,” Yoongi said jokingly, gesturing over at his suitcase. “Let’s go.”They didn’t go anywhere, of course, because before the night was over, Hoseok kissed Yoongi goodbye, and then Yoongi went back to Seoul a few days later with his friends, and without Hoseok.Their ‘I love you’s’ were less of a beginning, really, and more of what Yoongi soon came to understand as Hoseok’s version of ‘goodbye’.~*~Hoseok [Nov 30]: I was watching a game show and some guy bluffed his way out of a blatant cheat I thought of you shit not because of CHEATING wow I suck I just meant that you seem like you can bluff your way out of things in a funny wayYoongi [Nov 30]: wowHoseok[Nov 30]: that was my lame way of saying im thinking of uYoongi [Nov 30]: <3Yoongi [Dec 4]: HeyHoseok [Dec 5]: sorry had a long day, fell asleep soon as I got home :( I miss you I wish I could see your smileYoongi [Dec 5]: [image sent]Hoseok [Dec 5]: lol that’s ur dickYoongi [Dec 5]: [image sent]Hoseok [Dec 5]: what a nice smileYoongi [Dec 6]: Lets make holiday cookies together I’m disgusted with myself for even wanting to do thatYoongi [Dec 7]: Hobi?Yoongi [Dec 8]: Call me when you can?Yoongi [Dec 15]: Are you mad at me?Hoseok [Dec 15]: not madYoongi [Dec 15]: ???Yoongi [Dec 17]: Im not going to be that pathetic idiot who texts you five billion times because you don’t answer But wtf I haven’t talked to you at all? Are you okay?Yoongi [Dec 24]: Have a good holiday, Hoseokie I love you.No one was around.Taehyung went home to Daegu. Jungkook went home to Busan. Maybe they’d visit each other during that time, meet the parents.It wouldn’t be appropriate to call Seokjin, and Yoongi had no idea what Namjoon was up to.And Hoseok seemed to have vanished. Yoongi knew he could go to Gwangju if he wanted to, but he didn’t know what he would do once he got there. He had absolutely no idea where Hoseok lived, and if Hoseok wouldn’t answer his texts, he didn’t know how to get him to meet up. Yoongi was cut off. Yoongi was essentially put back into his place as a hookup, and it was like Hoseok was no longer interested. It was like Hoseok had never said he loved him, had never called Yoongi his boyfriend.Like the past seven months had been a lie.It crashed over Yoongi in a wave.Seokjin had tossed him aside, so why wouldn’t Hoseok?~*~“Maybe you should call first,” Jungkook said. “Won’t it be weird if you just show up at Seokjin hyung’s place unannounced?”“I still have a key, and I used to live there. Plus, we’re kind of on good terms. It’ll be fine,” Yoongi snapped. “I must have left one of my old journals there where I wrote songs, and my boss wants to look at them because he knows a guy…and I don’t know why I’m explaining this to you.”“I just…they’re living together,” Jungkook blurted out, darting in front of Yoongi to stop him from leaving. The kid had been lounging around Yoongi’s place all morning because Taehyung was busy doing something and he was bored. “I’ve known…I’ve known for a while, but it wasn’t my place and…”“Who’s living together?”“Seokjin hyung and…” Jungkook waved his arms out in the air like that would explain everything. And in a way, it did. Jungkook meant Seokjin was living with whoever he was dating. With whomever he had cheated on Yoongi with.“Did you know when he was cheating on me? Is that what you’re saying?”“No, I didn’t know until after, but I…look, if you go there, get him to tell you,” Jungkook said. Yoongi stood in the middle of his apartment. The place was a mess because Yoongi had spent the past several days in bed minus when he’d gone to work. New Year’s had come and gone, and there had been no word from Hoseok.Nothing.He was suddenly a ghost.A ghost who left Yoongi confused and angry. If things were over, then fine, because Yoongi didn’t believe in fate or any of that bullshit. But the least Hoseok could have done was properly ended things. Hell, the least he could have done was not started things to begin with. Would have made everything a whole lot easier.“I’ll be fine, Kookie,” Yoongi said.“You’re already sad about Hoseok. I know you are, even if you haven’t talked about it. I would be sad too, if Taehyung just stopped—”“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” Yoongi said harshly. He pushed past Jungkook and left the apartment, slamming the door behind him, even though Jungkook was still inside. The hallway was silent, and even though Yoongi was pissed, he still thought about how much better things would be if the hallway were filled with Hoseok’s laughter.And then he cursed himself for thinking that what was meant to be a one night stand could actually turn out to be something good. Something real. Because it couldn’t, evidently.They should have just left it at what it was. Yoongi shouldn’t have texted Hoseok and found out what a nice guy he was. He shouldn’t have let him in, it had been too soon, and Hoseok had been sketchy from the start. Whatever his deal was, Yoongi didn’t need that kind of burden.He really, truly didn’t.But Yoongi and his cursed feelings had other ideas. Ideas like being worried about Hoseok and hoping he was okay.Stupid fucking emotions, Yoongi thought to himself. Why’d Hoseok have to show up in my life at the exact perfect time? …No it was the exact worst time. Why couldn’t he have shown up three years ago before Seokjin and I dated.Maybe if Hoseok had shown up then…There wasn’t any point in thinking about what if’s. Yoongi knew that. What they had now, that was all there was. So Yoongi either had to take it or leave it.He either had to let Hoseok ignore him or he had to get his ass out of Seoul and go down to Gwangjju and find Hoseok and figure out exactly what the fuck was going on.Because you don’t just tell someone you love them and then stop calling and texting for weeks.For the time being, though, Yoongi needed to go find the old songs he’d written, which he assumed he left at the apartment he used to share with Seokjin. His producer boss had read some of Yoongi’s lyrics, and liked them, and said he’d like to read more, but Yoongi didn’t know what would happen after that. Maybe nothing.For whatever reason, though, he still had hope.That hope was probably what got him to Seokjin’s apartment without having a breakdown over Hoseok and the general state of Yoongi’s life. He was in some kind of limbo between being happy and being devastated, and in a way, it was the worst kind of feeling.It was the exact feeling, he realized, he’d had after he’d slept with Hoseok the first time. He’d been happy, but still devastated over what happened with Seokjin and that whole betrayal.“Yoongi?”“Huh? Oh,” Yoongi looked up and down the hallway. He was in Seokjin’s building, at Seokjin’s apartment, but…why was Namjoon answering the door?“I think I left something here. I need to get it,” Yoongi said uncertainly. “Why are you here?”“What’d you leave?”“Notebook. Why are you here?” Yoongi repeated.“I—”“Joon? Who’s at the door?” Seokjin’s voice called from somewhere else in the apartment. “I was wondering if you wanted to eat here tonight or go out. I mean we live together now, but that doesn’t mean we can’t go on dates right? And—oh. Oh shit.”Yoongi gaped. Seokjin gaped back. Namjoon just kind of stood there with an expressionless look on his face.“I—Is it this notebook?” Namjoon said suddenly, picking something up off the little table near the door. It was that notebook, the one he was holding in his hands, all worn pages and scribbles. Yoongi remembered doodling Seokjin’s name in it, too, like a school girl with a crush, just to solidify that he did like Seokjin, back then. He really, really did.“Yes. Yeah,” Yoongi answered.“Yoongi,” Seokjin said softly“No. I fucking—I fucking asked you if you were screwing Namjoon and you said no! You lied to me again! You were screwing one of my best friends? Are you kidding me?” Yoongi shouted. “Why didn’t you just—why didn’t you just break up with me?”“And that would have gone better? Me breaking up with you and then telling you it was because I was desperately in love with Namjoon? You would have still been pissed,” Seokjin shouted back, which wasn’t what Yoongi expected him to do. He expected Seokjin to be calm again, like he was from the start. But no, he seemed angry too.“It would have been better than you cheating on me!”“Either way, you would have handled it like shit!” Seokjin exclaimed. “Namjoon doesn’t do that. You know, he’s stable. He isn’t sitting around constantly waiting for things.”“Okay, um…look, Jin, Yoongi has a right to be upset…” Namjoon said carefully.The whole building felt like it was spinning. Yoongi’s ears were ringing and his hands shook.“No, look, I have a right to be mad too!” Seokjin said, pushing Namjoon out of the way so he stood in front of Yoongi, who still stood right outside the doorway, trembling. “You sit and whine and complain about things all the time, Yoongi, but you could just go out and fix them. You could make things better, and you never did. You never tried with us, you never put in the effort to make things work again between us. And fine, if it wasn’t working, fine. It’s over now. But don’t come to me and say that you’re so shocked and so upset, because I think you and I both know that you were relieved to have been given a way out of our relationship.”“Fuck you,” Yoongi hissed between his teeth.“You’re just going to sit back and do the same thing with the new guy you’re dating too, if you don’t figure out how to have an actual say in your own life. I want to be your friend, Yoongi, but you know we never should have been more than that,” Seokjin said, firmly, but also with less of a bite than the rest of it all.“I think that’s enough,” Namjoon interjected. “You don’t have the right to talk to Yoongi about his relationship now, Jin. I love you, but Yoongi is my friend, too.”I love you.I love you, but.“It isn’t all my fault,” Seokjin stated. “You know it, and I know it. Yes, it was wrong for me to have cheated…but it isn’t all my fault.”“It’s more mine than his,” Namjoon said, and he put a hand on Yoongi’s shoulder. “Hyung, please don’t cry.”“I’m—I’m not fucking crying,” Yoongi snapped, and shrugged Namjoon’s hand away. Except, okay, fine, maybe he was crying. “You’re both assholes.”“Maybe,” Seokjin said. “But are you really any better? I mean, are any of us not assholes? Except maybe Jungkook. He’s still nice, we haven’t tainted him yet, but I’m sure Taehyung will get around to that soon.”“Can I just have my notebook?” Yoongi asked, wiping his hand over his running nose and damp cheeks.Namjoon handed over the notebook. It felt heavy, weighted, and Yoongi was half tempted to just chuck it down the hallway, but all that would do is prove Seokjin right. So Yoongi just tucked it under his arm and sniffled loudly. Perhaps it wasn’t the notebook that felt heavy, but rather Yoongi himself. His legs didn’t want to move.“Are we okay?” Namjoon asked.“No,” Yoongi answered instantly, because that seemed like the right answer. It probably wasn’t, though. “But, you’re still my friend,” he muttered after a moment. “I just…I need to go.”“You can stay for dinner,” Seokjin said quickly. “Or just come in. I hate…I hate leaving on bad terms, you know that.”“No, I have to go,” Yoongi repeated. “You were right. I have to go.”“Where?” Namjoon asked. Concern laced his features. And on any other day, Yoongi would have sucked it up and had dinner with them, but it wasn’t another day and Namjoon and Seokjin’s secret was the least of Yoongi’s problems. At least, it was the problem Yoongi currently cared the least about.“I need to go to Gwangju,” Yoongi said softly.Namjoon and Seokjin exchanged a glance, a knowing look, and they both nodded.“Good luck, I hope you find what you’re looking for when you get there,” Seokjin said.“I already did find it,” Yoongi said, but he was backing away from the doorway, ready to turn on his heels and run.~*~Yoongi didn’t pack anything. He didn’t pack anything, his cheeks were still wet from crying, and he hadn’t spoken to Hoseok in…too long. But, he was going to Gwangju. Granted, he had no plan and no way of legitimately finding Hoseok.The only thing he had with him was his notebook and the clothes he was wearing and his cell phone. Not even a charger in case his phone died. Luckily, it was the weekend, and if he got to Gwangju that night, he hoped that Jimin would be working. Hoseok mentioned he still worked at the casino on weekends, and that was the only lead Yoongi had, really.He wasn’t sure if it was weird or creepy to just show up. He wasn’t sure if he should have just let it all go. But he didn’t want to let it go, and if he did nothing, he would probably always wonder.Thus, he soon found himself seated at the casino bar, craning his neck to look for any sign of pink-haired Park Jimin. The hotel-casino was busy that night, as it had been the first time Yoongi had been. People were laughing, drinking, and having a good time. Yoongi wondered, in the back of his mind, if they were really as carefree as they all looked or if they were just pushing everything aside, like Yoongi had been doing.With a small sigh, Yoongi took his phone out. It was nearly seven in the evening.Uncertain fingers managed to type out a message to Hoseok.Yoongi: I’m in Gwangju. I don’t know if you’re getting these messages, but I think I deserve an explanation“If you’re here to see Hoseok, I would prefer you didn’t do it here.” Yoongi startled and looked up to meet Jimin’s gaze. His pink hair hung in his eyes, but it was faded to a nearly blonde shade. “He and I aren’t speaking, and it’ll just be awkward.”“I’m not meeting him here,” Yoongi said. “I was actually looking for you.”Jimin wiped a towel across the bar in front of where Yoongi was sitting, so Yoongi had to take his arms off the shiny wood and lean back. “What do you want to see me for?”“I haven’t spoken to Hoseok in practically a month,” Yoongi said. “I don’t know why. He just stopped contacting me, and I’m worried about him.”“If he stopped talking to you, maybe you should just forget about him,” Jimin said. “It was wrong of him to pick you up that night, anyway. I told him it was wrong, but I’m not his keeper and I guess he can do what he wants…”“He said he loved me, and then disappeared. I’m not going to just forget about him,” Yoongi argued. “Whatever it is that he’s being so secretive about, I’m not going to judge him. Does he still live at home? Is that it?”“No?”Yoongi rolled his eyes and looked around again. The slot machines were still there, and Yoongi watched as someone shouted in surprise. They’d hit the jackpot.“I just want to talk to him,” Yoongi said without looking back at Jimin. “That’s all.”Jimin sighed dramatically. “I can give you the address to his apartment,” Jimin said, but he sounded very put-out about it. Like it was the hardest thing he’d ever had to do. “But you won’t like what you find when you get there. I can’t believe he hasn’t told you. I genuinely thought he did, and you just didn’t care, that you were cool with it.”“Cool with what? Either tell me or give me his address,” Yoongi said impatiently.Jimin opened his mouth as if to say something more, but he reconsidered and instead plucked a napkin from somewhere behind the bar and pulled a pen from the apron he wore. He scribbled some words and numbers on the napkin and slid it across the counter to Yoongi.“It’s not that I don’t think you’re good for him or that he’s not good for you,” Jimin said. “I just don’t agree with the way he’s handling things…I told him…I told him not to put himself in the position he’s now in, but he never listens. Hoseok thinks with his heart sometimes rather than his head. He sacrificed a lot because of that. Maybe if he had waited…maybe things could have worked out with you and him.”Yoongi blinked. Jimin wasn’t making any sense, of course.“Okay…well, thanks?”“Don’t thank me,” Jimin said and looked away. “I’ve gotta get back to work, and you should…I guess go find Hoseok.”Yoongi slid off the bar stool and watched Jimin walk to tend to another customer.There were plenty of questions that Yoongi wanted to ask him. He didn’t ask, though, because he knew the person he needed to ask wasn’t Jimin, but Hoseok. Hoseok was the only one with real answers.~*~So Hoseok definitely did not live with his parents still. The apartment building Yoongi pulled up to was small, and so the apartments inside were probably pretty small too. They weren’t run down, though, the building seemed perfectly decent, so Yoongi was still unsure as to why Hoseok never brought him there.In the lobby to the building, someone behind a front desk greeted Yoongi with a wave. In the elevator on the way up, a woman and her son gave Yoongi a small smile. In the hallway on Hoseok’s floor, a man was going into his apartment, briefcase in hand, and he gave Yoongi a nod of acknowledgement.Everyone was friendly.Gwangju was a friendly place.Hoseok’s apartment was at the end of the hall, all the way in the corner, and on the door was a little wooden sun, painted yellow and hanging from a tiny hook hammered into the door under the apartment number. The sun had a little smile, like it knew a secret, and Yoongi was certain that Hoseok had hung it there.In the few moments in which Yoongi stood there staring at the little sun, he realized he could hear voiced inside Hoseok’s apartment. Before knocking, Yoongi listened. He couldn’t make out what exactly anyone was saying, but he was able to tell that the voices inside were female, and that there may have been two of them. If Hoseok was inside, he wasn’t speaking, because Yoongi knew he would be able to recognize his voice.Really, then, all that was left to do was knock.‘You won’t like what you find…’ Jimin’s words echoed in Yoongi’s mind, but he still raised his fist to the door and knocked, anyway, twice.“I’ll get it,” someone called inside, and it was undoubtedly Hoseok. “No, it’s fine. I don’t know who it is, Dawon, how the hell would I? I can’t see through doors?”There was a slight laugh, and then the door swung open and Yoongi’s heart skipped a beat. He looked the same, his hair dark, and he was dressed in a pair of grey sweats and a green t-shirt. No socks. He was wearing the necklace and the charm was on it.“What the fuck?” Yoongi hissed. “I thought—what the fuck?”Hoseok’s eyes were big, and he was still holding the door knob and his heart-shaped mouth was instead formed into a little ‘o’ of surprise. He said nothing.“What the fuck!” Yoongi repeated, a little bit louder. He pushed one of Hoseok’s shoulders in a way that was meant to be slightly playful, but instead had an angry edge to it that made Hoseok back up and Yoongi take a step forward, into the apartment. “I thought you had died or something!” Yoongi said lowly. It was a lie, he hadn’t actually thought Hoseok was dead, but dramatics seemed like the way to go, because otherwise he would just start laughing or crying and throw himself into Hoseok’s arms or some shit.“I—I didn’t die,” Hoseok stuttered. “Yoongi—”“You just fucking ignored me for—”“Who is this?” one of the female voices cut in and Yoongi looked away from Hoseok.Behind him was a little kitchen area and the living room. The kitchen area had a tiny dining table, where two women sat, peering back at Yoongi curiously. One of them looked kinder than the other, with long dark hair and a slender nose. The other woman was slighter, and had a severe bob and dark tinted lip gloss on. Her shoulders were set and her mouth was pressed in a hard line. Yoongi looked back and forth between them. The kinder looking woman seemed to be a little bit older, and the longer Yoongi looked at her, the more Yoongi could see the similarities between her and Hoseok.She was probably his sister.Yoongi would have assumed the other girl was Hoseok’s sister too, were it not for the fact that she looked nothing like him, nor anything like the other girl. Her hands were folded on the table and she was practically glaring at Yoongi. Also, there was a silver ring on her left ring finger.“Eomma!”That was a new voice. A younger one.Yoongi watched a young child, probably somewhere between three and five, bounded out of one of the other rooms and latched himself onto Hoseok’s leg.What the fuck.“No, Eun, come here,” the kinder-looking woman said, and the little boy waddled over to her.“Eomma, who’s that?” he pointed at Yoongi. Okay. So the kid wasn’t Hoseok’s, it was his sister’s kid…probably.“Yoongi, what’re you…what’re you doing here?” Hoseok asked.“Better question is, who are you?” the woman with the ring on her finger asked.“Min Yoongi,” Yoongi said softly.“Hoseok, who is this?” she turned to Hoseok, and he looked back at her, and then to his sister. His sister looked away.“Chin Sun, can you just give us a minute?” Hoseok asked.“No,” the woman, Chin Sun, crossed her arms and stood from her chair. She as a tiny bit shorter than Yoongi was, and when she stood next to Hoseok, something sunk in Yoongi’s gut. “I am still your wife, Hoseok, and I still live here. I think I deserve an explanation as to who this man is that just barged into our apartment.”“Christ,” the other woman murmured.“Dawon, please, why don’t you give us a moment?” Chin Sun said.Yoongi swallowed thickly and forced himself to look back to Hoseok.“You’re married?” Yoongi asked.“Hoseok, who is this?” Chin Sun asked again.“You’re…fuck…you’re married,” Yoongi took a step back, but slammed into the wall, which made Dawon, Hoseok’s actual sister, stand and reach out to steady Yoongi and the kid to screech.“I fucking told you, Hoseok, you wouldn’t be able to do this,” Dawon hissed at her brother. Then she turned to Yoongi, sadness in her eyes. “Are you okay?”It all made sense. Yoongi understood.He understood what Hoseok had said, what he had meant, when he said he was cheated on, too. Maybe his wife—his wife—had cheated on him, and so…he retaliated? He’d never said he’d broken up with the person who had cheated on him. Yoongi understood the whole thing with that old lady. She was asking Hoseok how his wife was while Hoseok was on a date with Yoongi. Then Hoseok had sex with Yoongi—they had sex so many times—all the while, he was married.However, he wasn’t wearing a wedding ring.But Yoongi understood.He understood why Hoseok never brought him to his apartment, and why Jimin was acting so weird. He understood why Hoseok had been acting so damn weird.“I should go,” Yoongi breathed. “I shouldn’t have come.”“No, Yoongi, please wait,” Hoseok begged, but Yoongi was prying himself away from Hoseok’s sister and stumbling back out into the hallway. He couldn’t breathe. The hallway seemed endless, like he would never make it to the elevator. “Yoongi, hyung, please.”Okay. Okay, he was on the floor.He was on the floor and he was crying.“Hyung,” Hoseok was crouched next to him, his hand on Yoongi’s back. It felt like a brick.“Get o—off me,” Yoongi stuttered.“Yoongi, please, please let me explain,” Hoseok said. And god, he sounded so sad. He sounded so sorry.“What is t—there to explain? You’ve been—you’ve been doing the exact thing that he did to me! Only w—worse! You’re married!” Yoongi said, his voice rising and tears clouding his eyes as he tried to scoot away from Hoseok until his back hit the wall.Back down the hall, Chin Sun and Dawon were watching them, but it seemed like Dawon was trying to get Chin Sun to come back into the apartment.“We’re getting divorced!” Hoseok said suddenly, sharply. He repeated it another time, softer. “We’re getting a divorce, hyung.”“That doesn’t make it okay!”“I know. I know, Yoongi, god, please, just let me explain. Let me explain and then you can leave and never see me again, and I know I don’t deserve that after ignoring you, but I’ll do anything. I’ll get on my knees—well I’m already on them—and beg. I’ll beg and plead,” Hoseok said. His hand was reaching out towards Yoongi’s face, but he didn’t touch.“You don’t deserve it,” Yoongi said.“Hoseok, you better come back inside!”“Or what?” Hoseok shouted back at Chin Sun. She made a face that was something like shock, and Yoongi understood one more thing. He understood that Chin Sun had slapped Hoseok that day and that maybe, just maybe, she’d done more than that. Maybe not physically, but emotionally. And maybe Hoseok’s retaliation now, him defying her so openly, maybe it was his first time truly doing that.“Fine,” Yoongi croaked. “Explain.”“Here?”With a grunt, Yoongi pushed himself back to his feet, heard the door to Hoseok’s apartment slam closed, and crossed his arms. “Yes, here,” Yoongi said. The tears on his face felt like fire, in the same way Hoseok’s hands used to against his skin.Hoseok took a deep, shuddering breath and nodded. After a brief pause, he began to speak in a way that showed he knew he only had one shot. One shot to keep everything from completely crumbling. “Okay. Okay,” he said quickly. “I—we got married when we were young, really young. We met when we were seventeen and when we went off the college, her here in Gwangju and me in Seoul, we kept dating. It was one of those stupid things of us being desperately crazy about each other, but in an immature way.”Yoongi chewed on his bottom lip while he listened. While he waited for Hoseok to say something that would help him forgive.“Then what?” Yoongi asked.“Then…then she thought she was pregnant,” Hoseok said with a shrug. “She wasn’t, but the test said she was and so…so I asked her to marry me. And she said yes and we did it. A quick thing, you know? And even after we found out she wasn’t pregnant, it was fine…we…we thought we were in love.”“So you left school?” Yoongi remembered back to when Hoseok said he spent two years in Seoul for school. Only two, nothing more.“I had to, right?” Hoseok asked. He looked away and ran his hands over his face. “I quit school and moved back here and got a boring, reliable job so that she could keep doing school and…and she still wanted to have a kid, you know?“Maybe I can’t have them. We never could. I never went to a doctor. I don’t even know if I wanted kids or if it was just her. I don’t know, Yoongi,” Hoseok ran his hands through his hair and tugged.“So, what about now, then? What about me? Us?” Yoongi asked. The anger had faded, perhaps because Hoseok looked defeated. Perhaps because Yoongi loved Hoseok, even though…“She cheated. I didn’t lie about that. Her and I haven’t had sex in…god, I don’t even know how long, but I found her texts, I knew she was cheating, so I went out. I wanted to just hook up with someone and let that be it. I saw you, you…you’re cute. I saw you and I talked to you and I was never supposed to see you again, but here we are. I’m the worst hopeless romantic ever and I liked your smile too much,” Hoseok admitted. “And so I left the note for you. I haven’t had sex with anyone but you, I swear.”“Did you not think I would find out that you were married?”“I half hoped she would leave me,” Hoseok answered. “She continued the affair, but…I guess she wants to have her cake and eat it too, or whatever. Over the years, she’s become less of the girl I knew when we met. She doesn’t let me have friends, or go out, or dance.”“That’s fucked up,” Yoongi whispered.“She broke my phone, that’s why I haven’t texted you since whenever I last did. I know I could have called, but…the divorce,” Hoseok said, waving his hand out towards his apartment. Yoongi quickly caught his hand and squeezed it. Hoseok’s breath caught and he wouldn’t look Yoongi in the eye.“What about the divorce?”“Well, you know, I said we haven’t…her and I…we haven’t had sex,” Hoseok said weakly. “But, she’s finally gonna have that baby she wants so bad. It isn’t mine.”“Shit,” Yoongi said. Shit.“She’s fighting me on it. I don’t know why. That’s another reason I haven’t contacted you. I was afraid she’d use you against me. My sister has been helping me, but…I’m fucking twenty-three. I don’t know how to do this. And I miss you. I missed you so much. I wished I was with you during the holidays and I wanted to kiss you at midnight and instead I was sulking with my sister and her boyfriend because I couldn’t be here,” Hoseok ranted. “And it isn’t an excuse. None of this is an excuse for what I did to you.”“If you had told me…”“What?” Hoseok asked. “You would have been pissed and never seen me again. Which is part of why I didn’t. I don’t want to lose you.”“Well this whole things sucks ass, Jung Hoseok,” Yoongi said, and Hoseok laughed weakly.“I know it does,” he agreed. A tear slid down Hoseok’s cheek and Yoongi’s shoulders slumped.“C’mere,” Yoongi said and held his arms out. Hoseok fell into him and buried his head into Yoongi’s shoulder with a choked sob.“I don’t know how I screwed up my life so bad,” Hoseok said as he clawed at Yoongi’s back, trying to hug him closer. “I don’t know why we couldn’t have met sooner.”“Because that kind of shit doesn’t exist. There’s no fate, Hoseokie,” Yoongi replied. “There just…is. This is the life you have and you have to figure out how to fix it.”“What I did to you was wrong. I—I manipulated you into sleeping with me, pretty much, why’re you still here? You should be gone.”“You didn’t manipulate me into anything, you idiot. It was supposed to be a one-night stand and I was fully aware of that. I knew what I was getting into. Maybe I shouldn’t have texted you, but I did,” Yoongi said. But standing there, clinging to each other, it didn’t feel like a mistake. It hurt, yes, but it didn’t feel like a mistake.“What do we do now?” Hoseok asked, so softly that Yoongi almost didn’t catch it. He could feel Hoseok’s tears soaking into his shirt and his nails digging into his back.He could imagine waking up next to Hoseok every morning, properly. He could imagine dates out with him, and going to movies, and holding hands, and having a singular life together, in a way that was them. Hoseok and Yoongi. Yoongi and Hoseok. The passion was there. Yoongi hadn’t driven to Gwangju to let Hoseok go. He’d driven to Gwangju that night to find Hoseok. He wanted something with him. Anything.But all of that was far away.Both of them were broken and they hadn’t healed and both of them still had loose ends and were full of uncertainty.Oh, and Hoseok was still married. That was a problem.“I don’t know what we do now,” Yoongi admitted. “I want to forgive you, but…”“You shouldn’t,” Hoseok finished, and pulled back from their embrace. “But if you do…I promise never to—”“I’m not asking you for promises,” Yoongi quickly interrupted. “But, I think we both need to figure out our lives before we do anything. I won’t keep seeing you while you’re still married, even if you’re sleeping on the couch or whatever.” Hoseok nodded in understanding. “We met when we were both in terrible places, Hoseokie. Who’s to say we’ll work when we aren’t in terrible places?”“We might not.”“Exactly.”Hoseok nodded and dropped his hands to his side. And Yoongi found himself leaning forward to place a kiss at the corner of Hoseok’s mouth. Chaste.“I’m sorry.”“So am I,” Yoongi said.“Is this it?” Hoseok asked.“Call me,” Yoongi heard himself say. “Call me after the divorce is done and you’re stable. Call me when you’re happy. Even if it takes a year, okay? Call me. I’m not—I’m not forgiving you, not right now. But maybe one day we can start over.”“That sounds good. Starting over, I mean,” Hoseok said.“Yeah.” Truthfully, it didn’t sound all that good. It was just the only thing they had left.Hoseok swallowed and took a shaky breath. “Can I have your number again? My phone…it’s broken, remember.”Yoongi smiled and nodded. He found the napkin Jimin had written Hoseok’s address on and Hoseok rushed back to his apartment for a pen, and after a moment of shouting, he returned and handed Yoongi the pen. Once his number was down, Yoongi handed the napkin over and their hands brushed, a tiny spark between them.“What if you’re seeing someone else?” Hoseok asked.“We just have to see what happens. We’ll have to start over.”Hoseok nodded. “That sounds good. Starting over, I mean.”And that chaste kiss was the last thing between them that evening. Hoseok folded up the napkin carefully and tucked it in his pocket. The music note charm on his necklace glinted under the hallway lights, as if an afterthought.“I’ll call,” Hoseok said.“I’ll answer.”Then Hoseok turned on his heels and dragged himself back down the hallway. He looked back at Yoongi when he reached to open the door, and gave him a weak smile before opening it and stepping inside. When it clicked shut behind him, another tear streaked down Yoongi’s cheek, but it felt like ice instead of fire.Min Yoongi didn’t believe in fate, or soulmates, or ‘finding what you’re looking for’ at the exact perfect time. If fate existed, he and Hoseok would have met sooner, or Hoseok wouldn’t have married Chin Sun and Yoongi wouldn’t have agreed to go on a date with Seokjin. If fate existed, soulmates would be tied together with a red string and would find each other without hardship. If fate existed, love would be easy.But love wasn’t easy.Love hurt, and it tore at him, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t real.Because while Min Yoongi didn’t believe in fate, or soulmates, or perfect timing, he did still believe in love.He believed in love and he believed in second chances.Min Yoongi believed in Jung Hoseok.~*~
It is sometime later.
Waves lap at the sand a few feet away from where Yoongi sits and the sound of laughter echoes in his ears. The pen in his hand glides across the paper in the notebook he has propped in his lap. The leather cover feels warm against his legs, and surely the notebook will be clogged with sand by the end of the day, but he doesn’t care.
The notebook has braved years and years of being written in. Years of papers being torn out and stuffed inside. Years of pen and pencil and erasing and rewriting. Years of being carried in a backpack or under Yoongi’s arm.
A little sand won’t hurt it.
“What’re you doing?”
A weight settles behind him, legs on either side, and arms around his waist. A chin rests on his shoulder, looking down at the notebook in his lap.
“Writing,” Yoongi answers, craning his neck to kiss the man behind him.
“Can I see?”
“It’s just ideas, nothing solid right now,” Yoongi says against his lips.
“Hmm. If you say so,” Hoseok shrugs and looks out at the water. His breath is warm against Yoongi’s already heated skin, and Hoseok smells like sunscreen.
Behind them, the smell of food being cooked by Seokjin drifts from the beach house, and off in the blue water, some of their friends are swimming. Water splashes where they swim, Jungkook shouts, Taehyung dunks his head under the water and pops up when Jimin dunks under, too. Somewhere farther down the beach, Namjoon is setting up a place for a bonfire later.
“It’s nice here,” Hoseok whispers. “But I’m excited to go back home.”
“We just got here. We’re always home,” Yoongi says.
“Well, I love being home with you,” Hoseok retorts simply. It isn’t an overly cheesy statement, he says it like it’s fact. And it is, Yoongi supposes, if the sleepy smiles on their faces every morning when they wake up together are any indicator.
“Don’t tell everyone else you’d rather be home. Seokjin will flip his shit since he organized this whole get-together,” Yoongi jokes and Hoseok pokes him in the stomach until Yoongi is laughing breathlessly. Hoseok tackles him into the sand, the notebook goes flying somewhere, and eventually, in their struggles, Yoongi manages to come out on top and Hoseok wheezes with silent laughter under him.
“I love you,” Hoseok says. “But get off me.”
“You started it.”
Hoseok’s face softens, the shadow of a cloud blocking the sun passes over them, and Hoseok brushes his hand over Yoongi’s cheek like he’s fascinated by him. Hoseok tells Yoongi all the time that Yoongi’s the one with hearts in his eyes when he looks at Hoseok, but all their friends know that Hoseok has them too. He looks at Yoongi like he’s the entire world.
“No making out on the beach!” someone shrieks behind them and Yoongi sighs and rolls off Hoseok so they’re lying side by side, hand in hand, in the sand.
Hoseok’s thumb moves back and forth against Yoongi’s skin.
The clouds drift across the sky and the two of them watch. They don’t speak. They just feel.
It is some time later.
~*~[group chat name was changed to Yoongs Finds True Love]TaeTae: Good luck on your date!Jungkook: it will go great I mean, you guys already banged so you know that parts goodSeokjin: jungkook, go to your roomJungkook: eat my assTaeTae: wtf I just wanted to wish yoongs hyung good luck what is going onNamjoon: Please no ass eating in the group chat.Yoongi: Fuck off, I’m waiting for him to get hereJungkook: I hope it goes well eat some ass get your ass eaten all thatTaeTae: shut up, virginJungkook: ??? I’m not a virginYoongi rolled his eyes and locked his phone before shoving it in his back pocket. His hands weren’t shaking, but with how nervous he felt, it seemed like they should have been. Although, he had no idea why he felt so nervous, considering.Considering that a little over a year ago, he and Jung Hoseok had been together. They’d slept together, stayed up late at night talking on the phone, had dates, and exchanged ‘I love you’s’. It had all been done. But that was a long time ago, it seemed.Things had changed. Yoongi had written songs for big artists and even though he wasn’t famous, he certain was more well-off. He still had to work some odd jobs here and there, but for the most part, he felt stable in his life. He and Seokjin were friends, properly, again, he lived in a better apartment, and he didn’t hate what he saw when he looked in the mirror.He didn’t need someone to be in a relationship with. He didn’t need Hoseok in the sense that he would be incomplete without him, but…he needed him in the sense that Hoseok used to make everything just that much better. Brighter. Yoongi may not have needed that, but he wanted it.So when Hoseok called, finally, Yoongi answered, just like he’d said he would.“Where’re we going to meet?” Yoongi had asked.“I live in Seoul now,” Hoseok had said over the phone. “So we don’t have to worry about driving back and forth…but…so would you want to have dinner?” Hoseok sounded a little bit nervous, but there wasn’t an unhappy edge to his voice like there had been before. A lot could have happened since they’d last seen each other, hell, since they’d last spoken. Hoseok could have just not called at all, really. But he did call, and Yoongi answered.“Yes. Dinner sounds good.”Hoseok wasn’t late, it was just that Yoongi was early. The hostess had sat him outside, and the sun was setting, making the temperature somewhere between hot and cold, but not quite either. A backpack, Yoongi’s backpack, was propped against the side of the table and inside was a leather bound notebook. He brought it everywhere, and it wasn’t like the date was formal. Maybe he would show Hoseok some things inside.Or maybe Hoseok was seeing someone new and the dinner was just a formality. A ‘hey I don’t want you to wait for me forever because I’m not coming back to you’ kind of dinner.Worst case scenario (for Yoongi, at least) was that the divorce ended up not happening at all.Best case scenario, Yoongi and Hoseok could get to know each other again.“Can I take your order, or are you waiting for someone?” a deep voice asked from behind Yoongi.He startled and shook his head. “No, I’m waiting for—” Mid-turn, Yoongi stopped speaking, because it wasn’t the waiter. It was Hoseok, clearly making voice sound fucking ridiculous.A smile lit up his face. He was dressed simply, t-shirt and jeans, and his hair was still dark, but more brown than black. There was a silver chair around his neck, but any charms at the end were hidden, as the necklace disappeared in his shirt. He looked good. “Waiting for who?” he teased, and slid into the seat across from Yoongi.“My date, I guess,” Yoongi answered.“You guess?”“Yeah, I mean, is it a date? Dinner doesn’t mean date.”“I think it’s a date,” Hoseok said.“Oh you’re my date?” Yoongi asked with a smirk.Hoseok blushed and looked down at his hands. His mouth opened, and then closed. The sun had sunk in the sky, but that didn’t matter with Hoseok sitting across from Yoongi.“Hi,” Hoseok said finally, his voice confident. “I’m Jung Hoseok.”He extended his hand across the table towards Yoongi. Yoongi extended his hand as well, and they shook, once.“Hi,” Yoongi said softly. “I’m Min Yoongi.”
