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My Family Gave to Me On

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It starts, as these things do, with Dick.Dick Grayson had spent the entirety of December singing Christmas carols at the top of his lungs, ridiculously off key, much to his family's chagrin. For a few days, he had kept it to the Manor, which, while annoying, wasn't out of the ordinary for the Manor. But then it travelled. He and Harley spent an entire Stitch 'n' Bitch singing various versions of The Twelve Days of Christmas, much to the annoyance of everyone in the Iceberg Lounge. And then he started in on patrol. And that was really what started everything else.~*~Kate Kane’s revenge was simple. Whenever Dick started singing in her presence, she retaliated by singing Adam Sandler’s Chanukah Song as loud as she could, in an attempt to overpower him.She did try and get Bruce involved, but he remained steadfast in his refusal.~*~Stephanie is quick to join Dick on what she names Team Holiday Hoopla. She carols while she takes out criminals, making up lyrics to various songs as she goes (“Just hear those sirens ringing, alarms are shrieking there too, come on let’s go and take out another robber or two…”). She also takes to randomly dropping little notes that say Happy Holidays, from the Batgirls all over Gotham.Dick is completely ecstatic with this new development.~*~Jason and Tim are quick to form the alliance of Robins Against Dick’s Insanity (Damian refuses to join, because while he isn’t sure what to make of everything, he won’t actively side against his favorite brother). Steph quickly renames them to Team Grinch, which is really a misnomer, Tim is happy to point out, because both he and Jason are okay with the holidays. They just don’t want to deal with Dick’s Magical Christmas 24/7.It doesn’t really matter. Team Grinch sticks.~*~Babs joins Tim and Jason three days later. As it turns out, there’s only so much Dick Grayson she can handle.(“And I’m not even dating him anymore,” she confides to her two team members later.)~*~Kate, upon hearing there are teams, promptly grabs Bruce, yells out, for all to hear that they are Team Chanukah, and grapples away, all while Bruce protests that he didn’t agree to taking a side.The fact that she announces this several days into Chanukah makes all of Bruce’s children stop short and give each other questioning looks. They had known that Bruce was technically Jewish, but they hadn’t realized that Bruce celebrated any Jewish holidays, let alone Chanukah.The next morning, they go up to the attic looking for the family menorah, and generally cause chaos until Alfred goes to see what all the commotion is, and actually retrieves the menorah.For six days, the battle of the holidays is called to a truce, in honor of Bruce and Kate (and Martha and Thomas Wayne).~*~Cass and Damian are quick to form Team Whatever the day after Chanukah ends. Damian as a practicing Muslim has no real interest in the holiday itself, though he has agreed to celebrate it as a non-secular holiday.Cass just doesn’t care. She likes the holiday itself – there are pretty decorations, and everyone preaches for peace, and goodwill toward all men, but she doesn’t understand the fuss that Dick and her girlfriend put up about it (Dick’s boyfriend too, now that she thinks about it. Wally West is kind of crazy about any holiday).Bruce and Kate end up on Team Whatever by Christmas Eve, along with Selina and most of the Rouges. Several weeks of non-stop Christmas just gets old fast.~*~It ends with Nightwing. On Christmas Eve, he gathers together his family, father, siblings, cousin and all, and drags the Rouges to the tops of the Wayne Enterprises building.When he hands out lyric books, there are immediate protests.When he gives them a stern look, and point out that Agent A has come along specifically for this reason, everyone shuts up.And, for an hour and half after dark, on Christmas Eve night, Dick Grayson (dressed up in his Nightwing uniform, sure, but this is still all Dick), leads his family, the people he fights on a regular basis, and indeed, the people of Gotham in his final Caroling session of the season.  ~*~Somewhere, miles away, Clark Kent groggily stares out the window of his apartment, Lois Lane curled up beside him, and says “Who knew Batman could sing?”

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