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HELP! I AM IN LOVE WITH A DISNEY CARTOON VILLAIN In an all new Dr Phil…… Meet Janine, a 36 year old blonde woman who has a crush on Frollo, the villain from Disney’s “The Hunchback of Notre Dame”...... The episode opened with Janine being interviewed. She looked very happy….. “I am very much in love with Claude Frollo, ever since I was 16……..” Then it showed Janine in her living room watching The Hunchback of Notre Dame and looking at a scene featuring Frollo, in a VERY lustful way. “Frollo is my love. He is my life. He is so sexy and charming. He’s very kind to me……” Then it showed Janine writing a letter to Frollo….. “I have written countless letters to Frollo……” Then it showed paintings of her and Frollo….. “I have been to many artists and they have painted portraits of Frollo and I…..” The painting were mostly of her and Frollo kissing. Another had her and Frollo naked and having sex. Then it showed inside Janine’s bedroom. “This is my Frollo collection……” The bedroom was full of many Frollo things like….. “My Frollo bedsheets, my countless Frollo action figures, my Frollo curtains, my Frollo alarm clock that sings ‘Hellfire’ and my Frollo condoms. These are from Korea.” Then we cut back to her being interviewed. “Frollo and I are together, there is no question about it.” The interview ended with a painting of She and Frollo holding each other. After the introduction, we cut back to the studio where Dr Phil was interviewing Janine. “Now, Janine, you do know that Frollo is not a real person, right?” asked Dr Phil. “He is real to me,” answered Janine with no regret, “But you do know he is a fictional character from a movie that came out 20 years ago,” began the doctor. “Yes,” replied Janine. “When you say that Frollo is real to you, you’re lying to yourself,” said Dr Phil. “I’m not, Frollo and I are destined to be together,” replied Janine. The audience laughed. “You do know that Frollo himself is a horrible person,” Dr Phil said. “He’s racist, treats Quasimodo horribly and lies to him. The book is actually more graphic than this movie and Frollo was even worse in that.” “I don’t like Frollo in any other adaptations,” replied Janine. “I only like him in this movie.” “What attracts you to Frollo?” asked Dr Phil. “Well, he’s sexy, handsome, charming, dresses nice…….. Need I say more?” answered Janine. “Well, here’s a picture of Frollo,” said Dr Phil. The screen showed a picture of Frollo looking evil and menacing. The audience laughed again. “Yes, he’s quite a catch, isn’t he?” Dr Phil remarked sarcastically. “But maybe you’re attracted to the bad boy quality of him. Am I right?” “Yeah,” Janine answered with a smile. “But why Frollo, and not say.......Tom Hiddleston?” asked Dr Phil. All the women in the audience cheered. “Easy, ladies,” replied Phil. “Well, it’s just that Frollo has had an effect on me, since June 25th 1996,” said Janine. “You remember the exact date?” asked Dr Phil. “It was the best day of my life,” gushed Janine. “I remember it very well; my sister and I went to the theatre to see the movie, cos we were Disney fans. And ever since Frollo appeared on the screen……………. God, I get aroused thinking of it. And the next week, I went to see the movie again and the next week and the next week……… and then it came out on video and I’ve watched it many times.” “How many times have you watched the movie?” asked Dr Phil. “356 times,” answered Janine. The audience exclaimed. “You’re joking,” said Dr Phil. “Nope, I used to watch it 3 maybe 5 times a day,” replied Janine. “You must be getting sick of that movie,” added Dr Phil. “Why?” asked Janine. “Well, if I had to watch a movie over and over, I’d get sick of it,” answered Dr Phil. “And you say you watched it 3 to 5 times a day.” “Yeah,” replied Janine. “Is this all you do with your life?” asked Dr Phil. “Don’t you have any goals?” “Yes, I do have a goal,” answered Janine. “My goal is to live in Paris with Frollo forever.” The audience laughed. “But Janine, it’ll never happen because Frollo is not real,” said Dr Phil. “He’s real to me,” Janine said again. “Janine, you want to live in a fantasy world where you and Frollo are together,” said Dr Phil. “You have to live in the real world. Living in a fake world isn’t going to make you happy.” The audience applauded. Janine looked a little upset. “The truth is Dr Phil…………. I haven’t been happy since 1996………” Dr Phil looked into the camera and said “We’re going to take a commercial break, and when we return, we’ll be speaking to Janine’s sister Mildred.” Part One ended and when Part Two began, we saw Mildred, a brunette being interviewed. Mildred looked very unhappy. “My sister, Janine is a loon. She is in love with a cartoon character for God’s sake, it’s stupid. Ever since she was a kid, she has been in love with cartoon characters; Bugs Bunny, Michelangelo, Sonic, Mario and when we went to see Hunchback back in ‘96, she never shuts up about Frollo. All day long, all she does is watch Hunchback of Notre Dame, over and over and over. One time, my friends wanted to watch a movie and she suggested Hunchback. We got into a huge argument about it, to the point where we had to leave the house that night and do something else. Janine needs to understand that this Frollo is not real! I hope she can snap out of it.” In the studio, the doctor interviewed Janine and Mildred. “Mildred, you and Janine went to the same High School and she got bullied a lot,” Dr Phil began. “Yeah, well, when you act weird and are in love with friggin’ cartoon characters, what do you expect,” Mildred remarked. “Yeah, but you were no help when I was getting bullied,” said Janine. “Infact, one day the girls surrounded me and they pushed me and kicked me, and you just stood there watching, and you laughed!” “Is this true?” Dr Phil asked Mildred. “Yes,” answered Mildred. “Yeah, I was selfish. But I was a kid. Also, I pretended that Janine wasn’t my sister cos I was so embarrassed.” “Janine, I think the reason you’re in this fantasy world with Frollo was to escape the bullying,” said Dr Phil. Janine nodded. “But I had to quit my job, cos of her,” said an emotional Mildred. “I was working in a grocery store and everyone made fun of me; ‘Hey, has your freak sister married Frollo yet’ and ‘Hey, she should get a gigolo to dress up as Frollo for her’ and stuff. I couldn’t take it anymore so I had to quit. I now work in my father’s flower shop, with her!” Janine sighed. “Yes, I’m weird, but what do expect from a special needs student?” Janine began to cry. “You can be real jerk, Mildred.” Mildred, also teary, nodded. “So can you.” “Janine, do you want to live in the real world?” asked Dr Phil. Janine thought about this. “Kinda.” “But?” asked Dr Phil. “I don’t fit into the real world,” said Janine. “Would you like to?” asked Dr Phil. Janine sobbed a bit more and nodded. “Yes.” “Mildred, you have to help your sister understand the world she lives in today,” Dr Phil told her. He then looked back at Janine. “But Janine, you need Frollo out of your life and you have to stop watching Hunchback of Notre Dame,” said Dr Phil. “Okay,” said Janine, her face was wet with tears. “You watched Hunchback of Notre Dame to escape reality, which is what movies are for,” said Dr Phil. “It’s fun to dive into the world of movies and TV, but at the end of the day, you have to know your place. You’ve missed so much in your life.” “I know,” said Janine as she cried some more. “Also, why not have a crush on someone who is real?” said Dr Phil. “Hopefully not me!” The audience laughed. “What about Tom Hiddleston or Chris Hemsworth?” asked Dr Phil. “Maybe,” said Janine. “It’s okay to have a crush on a celebrity, as long as you don’t think that you would be together,” said Dr Phil. “Your crush can inspire you, as long as it's not a cartoon character. And Mildred, will you help your sister escape the past and enjoy the future?” Mildred nodded and cried. She then got up and walked over to Janine. They both hugged and cried. The audience, feeling emotional, applauded. “Janine, you said that June 25th 1996 was the best day of your life,” said Dr Phil. “Well, there will be a date in the future that will top that. You’ll see.” Janine nodded and wiped away her tears. “Also, you need to get rid of your Frollo stuff,” added the doctor. “Yeah, I’ve been thinking about pawning them and using the money to spend on something sensible,” said Janine. “I don’t know what I’ll spend it on, but it won’t be on something stupid like I used to.” “Well I wish you two the best of luck and hope for the best,” said Dr Phil as he turned to the camera. “I’d like to thank Janine and Mildred for being here today. You know it is fun to relive the past once in a while, but at the end of the day, you have to know what year you’re living in today. And you can’t use the past to escape a problem, that’ll only make things worse for you. But that phrase ‘Look forward to something’ is actually very powerful. Thank you very much, goodbye.” The audience applauded as the episode ended. Things looked good for Janine and Mildred. Janine was no longer obsessed with Frollo and pawned all her Frollo stuff. She got a total of 1,000 dollars for it! That was how much Frollo stuff she spent over the last 21 years! She used the money to do the one thing that she always wanted to do. She spent it on holiday to Paris, a place she had never been to before. She and Mildred went and had the best time of their lives. Dr Phil was right. This was better than June 25th 1996! Janine never watched The Hunchback of Notre Dame ever again after that, and had accepted the Frollo was not real. Will she ever find real love in her life? Who knows? THE END