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April 15, 2017“Harry, are you sure you’re just not reading too much into it?” Tobin asks quietly, shifting in her seat, glancing around at the other people at their table. The National Team players from the Thorns and Orlando Pride are at dinner in a busy restaurant in Portland after their afternoon preseason match. “I’m telling you, something is up. He’s acting weird towards me.” Allie half whispers in her ear, leaning over to speak with her. “Could we maybe talk about this later?” Tobin pleads, looking around and smiling at Ali before shooting Allie a glare. “Not here.”Allie glances up, realizing Tobin’s right and slides further from her, straightening in her chair. “Sure.” She says, her voice clipped. Tobin sighs, toying with her food. Allie’s upset because she thinks their coach is treating her differently this season and the season hasn’t even started yet. Allie isn’t one to get overly emotional about things like that, but something has triggered this in her. Tobin doesn’t want to talk about it her, at dinner, especially this kind of stuff. That should be private. Allie leans over again, “But he” she starts but Tobin shoots her a look. “Listen, I wouldn’t know how he’s acting. I’m not out on the field.” Tobin whispers harshly, her own frustration about this weird back injury she has slipping out. Allie recoils, making the others stop their conversation to look at them. Allie glances around, Ashlyn Harris arching her eyebrow at her. She sees the others looking at her curiously and then looking over at Tobin. Allie shrugs her shoulders, giving them a thin smile before resuming attacking her meal. After a moment, Ali Krieger clears her throat. “So you really can make a vegan doughnut?” Ali asks Kling. Meghan begins sharing her vegan cooking adventures and soon the table’s mood is light hearted again. Allie glances over at Tobin and sees she’s slowly eating, but her hand is balled in a tight fist. Allie sighs, leaning over to her again, “I’m sorry.” She says quietly. Tobin nods and continues eating, looking up when Ashlyn asks her about what’s new with her. Tobin’s reply makes the table stop again in shock. “What?” Ali asks, “Did I hear that right?” “What did she say?” Emily Sonnet asks from the end of the table, looking towards Tobin anxiously. Ashlyn grins at them. “Tobin said she’s thinking about buying a house.” “The nomad is settling down?” Lindsey Horan grins, looking expectedly at Tobin. Tobin looks at those around her, beginning to feel uncomfortable being the center of attention. “Well, yeah,” she shrugs, “I’ve been spending more time here than anywhere else.” She explains simply. “Why not put down some roots?” “Are you thinking condo or an actual house?” Kling asks her. “I’m not sure yet,” Tobin replies, “I’ve only just started thinking about it.” “Dude,” Ashlyn says, “a house is awesome, but it’s a lot of work. Make sure you get a really good inspector.”“An inspector?” Tobin asks, her eyebrows furrowed. “Yeah, they, like, go through the place before you buy it and tell you everything that’s wrong and needs fixing.” Ashlyn explains, “They make sure you don’t buy a money pit or something awful.” “Oh,” Tobin nods, realizing she has much to learn about the home buying process. “Are those Century 21 people getting in your ear?” Kling grins at her. Tobin smiles, “Nah, I don’t know, it just seems like maybe it’s time, you know?” The all nod and congratulate her. “Listen, anytime you have questions, just call,” Ashlyn offers, “really.” “Thanks, dude.” Tobin smile, “I’m sure I will.” The table resumes normal table conversation and the rest of the night goes well. “Hey, Har,” Tobin says to Allie once they’re outside the restaurant. Allie turns to towards her. “You wanna go get a coffee or something?” She asks. “And talk?” She’s letting her know she wants to hear her out. Allie smiles gratefully at her, slinging an arm around her shoulders. “Sure, Har.” She says. After saying goodbye to Ali and Ashlyn, they leave the others as well, citing their need for some Harry time. Their teammates nod, it’s not anything unusual. None of them had made any plans for after their dinner and they’re all tired from the match, so it wasn’t a big deal. They walk down the sidewalk, hands in pockets, the air crisp this evening. One of the coffee shops they like is right down the block and they head in and place their orders. Once seated in a quiet corner, Tobin nudges Allie with her leg. “So, what’s up?” she asks her seriously. “This isn’t like you.” Allie takes a deep breath, letting it out slowly, “I know,” she admits, “I don’t know why I’m feeling like this.” Tobin looks at her, seeing how upset she is, “You know,” she says decisively, “my place is close. Let’s talk there.” She gets up from the comfortable chair. Tobin realizes they are somewhat public figures and usually it’s not a problem, but she doesn’t want to get into a serious conversation, especially if it turns emotional, in a coffee shop right out in the open. She knows their faces would be posted all over social media and that’s not something she wants to deal with. Allie follows her, exchanging their mugs for to go cups and walking the few short blocks to Tobin’s apartment. Once seated on Tobin’s couch, Allie begins to tear up. “He’s more reserved, he doesn’t joke as much with me,” she starts, “I feel like he’s more critical, too.” “Well, it’s only been a few weeks,” Tobin reasons, “he’s pushing everyone hard. That’s how he is.” “I know,” Allie nods, toying with the lid on her cup, “but it just feels different.” She shrugs, “I can’t explain it.” They’re silent for a moment, Tobin mulling over what she’s about to ask her best friend.“Al,” she says quietly, gently, her voice so soft, “is he right about what he’s criticizing you on?” Allie bristles at her question, knowing Tobin would ask her something like that. If there’s one thing about Tobin, she doesn’t shy away from the hard questions. It’s one of the things she loves about her and also one of the things she hates. She keeps her accountable. She bites back a snarky response. “Maybe,” she shrugs, admitting defeat a bit, “but not everything.” “Okay,” Tobin says, “most coaches are like that.” Allie nods as she wipes her eyes. “Remember when Cindy would yell at us?” Tobin asks, referring to their first coach of the Thorns, “How she would ream us out for not making good crosses or smart passes?” Allie nods, smirking a little at the memory. “Remember how we decided to work on it ourselves and she kept spying on us when we were the only ones staying after practice?” Tobin continues, “And that one time, like, three weeks later, she came out on the field when it was just us two, apologizing and telling us we weren’t the ones she was worried about?” “It didn’t stop us,” Allie says quietly, nodding again. “No, it didn’t.” Tobin states. “The others knew what we were doing, we invited them to join us and they didn’t. They reacted to her criticism differently than we did. They took their anger and used it on the field, but it missed the point.” She leaned back, “We put in the extra work. We got better.” “Yeah, and before long Alex and Sinc were out there with us.” Allie smiles at the memory. Some of the best times they had were after practice, doing their own drills and slowly having others join them. “And Cindy still was spying and we were still winning.” Tobin smiles, thinking about those good times. “We chose how we would react to what Cindy said in a positive way. We tried to focus and improve on what she thought we were lacking in.” Tobin says, making her point. Allie sighs, leaning her head on Tobin’s shoulder. “You’re right.” She says, sniffling a little. “I guess, I just feel that maybe I was past some of those things. I don’t know why it’s getting under my skin.” “Well, maybe he’s planning on using you a little differently.” Tobin offers, “Maybe he wants you more well rounded? Maybe as a forward, a middy or a defensive mid?” She feels Allie nod against her shoulder. “I wish you could play,” Allie laments. Now it’s Tobin’s turn to sigh, “So do I.” She agrees quietly. She shifts on her couch, her back tightening up, thinking about how her injury occurred. It was just a normal practice, she was feeling good, they had been going hard, playing 11 v 11 when she went up for a header, got bumped, her back hitting someone’s knee and landing awkwardly, flailing backwards and landing on her side. The pain seared through her, her legs on fire and scaring her. She was on the ground, gritting her teeth to hold back the tears, pounding her right hand into the turf. She insisted she was fine, slowly getting to her feet after a few minutes. They took her immediately to the training room, making her freeze through multiple ice baths, stretching and ultra sound treatments. She went home that day with pain killers and anti-inflammatories. The next day she couldn’t get out of her bed. It went downhill from there. That was two weeks ago. She’s feeling better now, but the pain still lingers. The staff and herself will do just about anything to avoid surgery, so she’s laying low right now, not
even practicing with the team. Just stretching daily, icing and heating her back. She hates how the pain pills dull her senses. Allie straightens up, “I’m sorry for laying this on you, Harry,” she says, rubbing her hands along her thighs. “Nonsense.” Tobin says firmly. “We’re here for each other.” Allie looks at her, a smile on her face. “We are.” She notices Tobin’s forehead scrunched up. “Back hurt?” Tobin scrunches her mouth to the side, nodding, “I’m due for my meds,” she says, slowly, awkwardly getting up from the couch. She walks across the room to her kitchen, opening a cabinet and pulling two prescriptions bottles out and grabbing a water from her fridge. Allie rises from the couch as well, grabbing the empty coffee cups and tossing them in the garbage. She stands next to Tobin. “This is worse than my ankle after college.” Tobin states, knowing Allie was going to ask her how bad it was. “I’m sorry,” Allie says, feeling bad. Tobin is coming off of an amazing season last year and looked ready to take over the league with her play. “Yeah, this sucks,” Tobin admits, “but what am I gonna do?” “Are you sleeping okay?” Allie asks, having had her share of back issues. Tobin shakes her head, “Not without these pills,” she says, “I don’t know how Kling could play with something like this.” “Well, obviously this is something different,” Allie states, “have they diagnosed it?” “They’re calling it a back sprain,” Tobin says, shaking her head. “Well, you let me know if need anything,” Allie says, “I mean it,” she points her finger at Tobin, “don’t go trying to do something on your own. Call me.” “Oh, I will,” Tobin says, nodding her head, “I’m not going to be stupid with this, I want to get back.” “Alright,” Allie says, hugging her tight, “I’ll talk to you tomorrow, okay?” “Yeah, sounds good,” Tobin smiles, “Keep positive Har,” “I’ll do my best,” Allie says, gathering her purse, whipping out her phone to order her Uber. Tobin walks her to the door, “That’s all we can do,” Allie’s gives her a smile and then she’s off, down the hallway to the elevator. Tobin shuts the door, turning back into her place with a sigh, hoping Allie is wrong about Mark and things will get better for her. It’s only nine thirty, too early for bed for her, so she grabs her laptop and sits at her table, firing it up and beginning to search about tips for buying a house. Shortly into her
search, she gets up, walking to the corner where she stashes her art supplies, grabbing a fresh notebook and a pen, returning to the table to take some notes. She stands when her back tightens again, then lays across the couch, finally moving to her bed. She changes into a t-shirt and shorts, lying on her stomach with a pillow under her chest as she explores all of the ups and downs of buying a home. When her eyes begin to droop she powers off her laptop, sliding it over on her bed, tossing her pen and notebook on it and then getting under the covers. She turns out the light, mulling over the possibilities of buying her own place. She wonders if she’s truly ready for it. For the responsibility of it. She knows now that she disagrees with her one professor in college who said buying a home takes away the chance to still explore and have adventures. She still can get out there, she knows it’s in her blood. Buying a place, whether it’s a condo or an actual home, that isn’t going to change anything for her. She smiles a little, thinking about how she couch surfed for so many years, visiting friends and family, enjoying some awesome times with them. Sometimes the best ones were just sitting around a kitchen table or fire pit, just talking and enjoying each other’s company. One of the smartest things she’s ever done was listen to her father about finances. She banked nearly all of her earnings back then, spending her money only on necessities, like food, airfare when she had to and sometimes hotels as well. Her Dad told her when she was young about how money worked and encouraged her to practice good finances. Her freshman year of college, she took a money management course through the church she was attending and it really opened her eyes. People joked with her about staying in the dorms instead of an apartment was because of the freedom but part of the reason was she didn’t want to spend her money until she really had to. Her senior year, she finally relented, especially when she discovered how cheap it would be to split rent with the others. When she finally started seeing some money from the National Team, she banked it and asked some trusted adults about finding a good personal finance person. Through the years, she watched as her bank account grew, the cautious investments she made were showing profit and the small endorsement deals were bumping up her savings. Her one, somewhat extravagance was her car, a sleek Audi, which she fell in love with the first time she saw it. Besides that, she was pretty frugal. She didn’t speak much about money and finances with others, but she was able to help her Mom out when she purchased her place in Florida, glad she could contribute something back to her Mom for all she had done for her through the years. After her parents split, she remained on decent terms with Dad, the visits slowed, but they spoke often. He struggled with her sexuality but respected her enough to keep it mostly to himself. Tobin knew he didn’t understand and maybe didn’t approve but she stopped trying a long time ago, knowing the friction it caused between them. She knew he loved her and she was satisfied with that. Before she fell asleep, she decided he would be her first phone call to talk about buying something. He would give her good advice and get her moving in the right direction. April 16, 2017 It’s early evening the next day when she calls him. “How’s your back?” her Dad asks, jostling the phone, making the screen blurry for a moment. He’s still getting used to FaceTime. “Ah,” Tobin sighs, “not good, it still hurts, but not as much now,” Tobin replies. She’s laying on her bed, propped up by a few pillows. She’s done her stretches, taken her meds and
is thinking she’ll watch some TV after this call. “How are you doing? Did your project go alright?” They have a good chat, he’s excited for her and the new adventure in looking for place. She scribbles down his ideas in her notebook, asking questions, listening to his experiences and learning it’s a serious undertaking. She feels much better after speaking with him. She knows she has some important decisions to make. Especially about making a budget and figuring out just how much she’s willing to spend. Her dad opened her eyes to some additional expenses she’ll need to be prepared for, like homeowners insurance, association fees if she’s in a condo, lawn
equipment versus paying someone to do it, the list went on. She’s not discouraged though, if anything, it makes her more determined to figure out exactly what she wants to do. Her Dad’s easiest piece of advice was telling her to talk to her friends that have already gone through the process. She decides this will be first on her list. May 20, 2017 “This is really happening?” Allie asks as she takes a bite from her sandwich. “Yeah,” Tobin smiles, “it is.” “Oh, look out for Ms. Technical Director Heath now!” Allie jokes. “Seriously, it’s awesome. Right up your alley and setting yourself up for after you retire.”Tobin shakes her head, “It’s like the assistant to the technical director, but, I like it because I’ll be out there with the kids, you know? Like, it will be different than just doing camps.
We’ll be setting up training programs that will help kids of all ages succeed and learn what skills they need to progress to the highest level from a very early age.” “Something our parents had to pay a lot of money for us to learn,” Allie states, nodding knowingly. Tobin nods as she chews, “It’ll eventually give kids of all incomes a chance.” “When they gonna announce it?” Allie asks, taking a sip of water. “Within the next week.” Tobin answers. “You know everyone is going to question if your back issue is more serious than anyone’s saying and think you’re retiring.” Allie states. Tobin shrugs, “I can’t stop others from thinking what they think without knowing the whole story.” “I’m so happy you’re training with us again,” Allie smiles, “it’s just not the same without you, Har.” “I am too,” Tobin grins, looking across the table at Allie, “it’s been driving me crazy not playing.” Tobin’s been back with the team in a limited capacity. She’s on the field at practices, getting touches, shooting and running to build up her fitness. She hasn’t been released for full scrimmages yet, but she’s getting close. “How’s your back feel?” Allie questions, pulling her purse out to get her wallet. Lunch was her treat this time. They take turns without speaking about it. “There’s still something there,” Tobin admits, “but I’m still getting treatment.” “So, it’s getting better?” Allie presses, looking at her concerned. “Yeah,” Tobin sighs, “but there’s still something not right.” Allie glances around and then leans over the table, beckoning to Tobin to lean in as well. “Listen,” Allie speaks quietly, “this isn’t something to fuck with. We’re talking about the rest of your fucking life here. So, if it isn’t a hundred percent, don’t fucking risk it. We’re not getting any younger and you don’t want coming back too soon to fucking hurt yourself worse in the long run and cut your career short.” Tobin leans back, nodding at her. “My Mom said the same thing,” she says quietly, “except for the cussing.” She smirks. Allie makes a face at her, “Shut up, Har. I’m serious.” “I know you are, Har,” Tobin replies, “and if it still feels like this by the end of next week, I’ll shut it down.” May 27, 2017 Tobin enters her apartment, tossing her gear bag on the floor in disgust and frustration. She kicks off her slides, padding down the hallway when her eye catches a figure lying on her bed. “Hey, Har,” she says, leaning against the doorframe. Allie’s head pops up at the tone of Tobin’s voice. “How did it go?” she asks, nervous about Tobin’s news. Tobin was meeting with the medical team at Providence Park to review any new findings from her lingering back problem. Just weeks ago she was nearing a return to play but it still wasn’t feeling right. Tobin was adamant about that something was still wrong and she wasn’t good to go. Another round of testing and they called her in with a new diagnosis. “I’ll be going to LA to rehab with the National Team,” Tobin says dejectedly, looking down at her feet. She shakes the plastic bag in her hand, “with more fucking drugs.”
Allie leaves the bed and hugs her, “I’m sorry,” she says quietly, knowing it’s killing Tobin to be away from playing soccer and the camaraderie of the team. She knows it’s been hard on her to be around soccer yet unable to play. It’s messing with her head. She feels Tobin’s back shake a little as the tears come. “This is so frustrating,” she says through her tears, “I just want to play.” “I know,” Allie comforts, still holding her, “come on, let’s sit down.” She says and guides her to the living room couch. Allie sits closely next to her, Tobin leaning her head on her shoulder. “They gave me an anti-depressant,” she sniffs, “I’m not taking it.” “Har, you’ve been kinda depressed,” Allie points out. “I don’t want to take drugs,” Tobin persists, not wanting to let things get out of hand. “Sweetie, they might make you feel better,” Allie offers, knowing how stubborn Tobin can be. “I’m not weak,” Tobin sniffles, “I don’t want to depend on them.” “Taking some meds to help you out doesn’t make you weak,” Allie states firmly, “they’re there so you can get your mind in a better place.” Tobin sighs into her shoulder, not wanting to be dependent on medications of any type. She hates taking the pain pills but the one day she didn’t take them she was near tears from the pain. “Talk to Dawn,” Allie offers, “she knows you, she might be able to help you, without the drugs.” Tobin raises her head to look at Allie, “Yeah, that’s a good idea.” “You just don’t have the physical outlet to get rid of your frustrations right now,” Allie says, knowing exactly how Tobin releases her anger. Running. Climbing. Lifting. Insane cardio workouts. “You might even feel better quickly just being away from the team.” Tobin leans back on the couch, her eyes looking over Allie. “You’re probably right.” “You’re not weak.” Allie says firmly, tapping on Tobin’s leg, “Taking medications for depression doesn’t make you weak or a failure.” She repeats with conviction. “You’re right,” Tobin sighs, agreeing with the principle but not actually wanting to take them. They’re quiet for a moment.“When do you leave?” Allie asks, wondering how she’s getting there. “Can you sit for a flight?” Tobin sighs, “Tomorrow,” she says, “I booked a flight to see Perry and I have to take the new pain pill an hour before I get to the airport. The doctors put me on complete inactivity until mid-July.” Allie’s eyes open wide at that. This is much more serious for them to shut her down for six weeks. She stands up, “Well, let’s go,” she says walking down the hallway. “Go where?” Tobin confused, slowly getting up from the couch and following her. “Go and get you packed, Harry,” comes Allie’s reply from her bedroom. Allie already has Tobin’s suitcase out and is lifting it on the bed as Tobin enters the room. “Thanks, Har,” she says quietly, feeling immensely grateful for her best friend. She walks over to her dresser and begins to pull out some shirts. “Tell Bati to raid my fridge while I’ll gone, okay?” “Absolutely!” Allie grins. “Just the fresh stuff, not my wine!” Tobin points her finger at her. Allie rolls her eyes as she takes the pile of shirts from Tobin’s hands. May 28, 2017 “You don’t look so hot, sis,” Perry says, giving her sister a critical once over. “Yeah, well, I don’t feel so hot,” Tobin drawls, letting the strap of her backpack slide off her shoulder and onto the floor with a thud. “What are you on?” Perry asks, concern in her voice. “Some pain killer for the flight,” Tobin mumbles, pulling her suitcase past Perry down the hall to the guest room. Perry picks up Tobin’s backpack and follows her into the room. Tobin’s kicked off her flip flops and is slowly crawling on the bed craving sleep. Perry watches as her sister settles down on top of the covers, walking across the room and grabbing a light blanket from the closet and covering Tobin up. She lays next to her. Tobin’s lying on her stomach, facing Perry, her eyes glassy. “I’ll tell you about it if you’ll just please let me sleep for awhile, okay?” Tobin pleads quietly. Perry gives her a soft smile and a nod, she knows how stressed out her sister’s been about this injury, it’s concerning to the entire family. Everyone in the family has been concerned about her well being, physical and mental, checking in with her more often, sending cards and notes, making quick visits when they can. They’re all very aware of how Tobin can get depressed when’s she away from the game due to an injury. Now, with her here, Perry can get a good handle of her mental state and see what they can do to help her feel better. Perry keeps Tobin distracted. She sends her on errands, has her cooking dinners, working in her yard and garden for short spurts, she takes her shopping and generally just keeps her busy for most days. At night, they work on Tobin’s house project, Perry helping her sort through her notes, answering her questions and by the end of the three weeks she’s been there, Tobin is feeling much better. Perry’s husband was in and out of the house with business trips, so often it was just the two of them. There were days Tobin wandered the city streets, finding neat little stores and new places to eat. She’d relax in a coffee shop, reading a new book or writing in her journal. On a nice day, she’d hang out in a park, sketching or drawing. Some days, she’d be working on DA stuff, sending over skill diagrams and providing feedback on certain age level skill training. “You always help me get my head straight,” Tobin says, squeezing Perry hard in a hug, “thank you so much.” “No problem skinny,” Perry replies as they face each other, referring to Tobin’s loss of muscle tone from being so inactive. “Oh, I’ll give you skinny,” Tobin flashes her a smile, “next time, I’m kicking your ass at tennis.” “I’ll be waiting,” Perry says, “and we won’t just be playing for pride.” Tobin raises her eyebrows at that. “Cold. Hard. Cash.” Perry grins, poking Tobin’s chest with each word. “You’re on.” Tobin grins back, holding out her hand. Perry shakes it. “Keep yourself positive,” Perry advises, “you’re gonna rock rehab and be back before playoffs.” “I will,” Tobin nods, “thanks again. So much.” Her Uber pulls up and then Tobin’s gone, heading to the airport to meet her new nephews. July 10, 2017 “Jesus Christ, you look like a marathon runner!” Ash exclaims over the phone. “Dude, are you alright?” She’s referring to the photo Tobin posted in Instagram with her new baby nephews. She looks pretty skinny. “I’m fine,” Tobin replies with a yawn, “like, I can’t lift yet, and you know how quick you lose muscle mass.” “True,” Ash agrees, “dude, you and those babies though!” “Aren’t they the cutest things ever?” Tobin gushes. “They’re so little!” Her and Ashlyn catch up, talking about their families and what’s going on. Ash is coming off a leg injury and she’s hasn’t played for almost two months. They talk about the down time and rehab and commiserate about being so bored and how it kills them not to be playing. With her free time, Tobin’s been in touch with many of her friends, checking in and following their games. Allie’s been on her mind heavily, since the middle of June she’s been playing defensive mid and the first two games the Thorns lost. Allie knows her stats are down but Mark isn’t giving her the opportunities to try to score. She tells Tobin she feels sharp, her passing percentage is off the charts lately. But something is brewing and she can’t figure it out. Tobin tries to reassure her that Mark’s just using her where he thinks best for now and maybe also as a ploy for their run to the playoffs. Maybe he’s using different players in different positions to make it harder for the opposition to scout. When Allie answers back with a quiet maybe, Tobin knows she doesn’t believe her. She shocks Allie by bursting into tears, telling her how sorry she is she isn’t there to comfort her and be a real friend right now. Allie freaks out, this isn’t like Tobin at all, she knows it’s been rough on her but now she feels even worse for setting her off. They cry together and then sniffle, both sorry and feeling bad. “I think I’m homesick,” Tobin laments, “I just miss everything, you, the team, my apartment, the city, the food.” “If I wasn’t sitting, I’d be on the floor,” Allie says, sniffling stiff, “you, homesick?” “Yeah,” Tobin says, wiping her eyes, “I’m fucking homesick.” Allie arches her eyebrow at Tobin cursing. “This sucks,” she states.“One of the worst seasons ever,” Tobin agrees.“But you start rehab in two days,” Allie replies, “so get on track, get that back better and come back home.” “I will,” Tobin says determinedly, “I’ll be back before playoffs,” “I’ll work my hardest to keep us there so we can take it.” Allie promises. “You always do,” Tobin reminds her, “you’re one of the hardest working players I know.” They turn the conversation to lighter topics, Tobin telling her about new nephews and Allie sharing silly stories about Bati and his cooking adventures. They end their FaceTime call laughing, each feeling better and ready to tackle what comes next to each of them. July 12, 2017 Tobin connects with her cousin and her family and they offer her a room in their house while she’s in LA. She gladly accepts because, while she’s been visiting her sisters, and missing not having a bunch of people to hang with while she’s doing nothing. Sure, she’s been busy, talking to her finance person and making lists of the pros and cons of a house versus a condo. She’s started looking up realtors in Portland and reading their reviews and making a tentative list of her choices. She’s been on FaceTime countless times with Ash and Sinc, asking them about their experiences and asking for their input. But, at the end of the day, she’s a people person and being on her own is beginning to take its toll. Lisa and her husband John are wonderful to her, opening their home, sharing meals and just enjoying their time together. They laugh much, love hard and listen well when Tobin comes back after a day of not being able to increase her rehab once again. Dawn had told her sunshine was great for depression, so Tobin hit the beach most days after therapy, hanging out in the sand, wishing she could surf, but also content to just chill. Fans left her alone most of the time, but she always would pose for photos and sign autographs when asked. She got a little nervous when she was walking back to her car and a practically a whole team of ten year old soccer girls swarmed her. She must have looked panicked being surrounded by them, their screaming and excitement startling her, because one of the parents quickly brought the girls in line, ordering them to stand back and give Tobin space. She mouthed a thank you to the woman before taking a deep breath and then speaking with each of the excited girls, taking photos and signing soccer balls and some jerseys. When they were ushered away by the team mom or coach, Tobin wasn’t sure who the woman was, she slipped into her car, leaning her head against the steering wheel to collect herself before attempting to drive back to her cousin’s house. July 22, 2017 “So, Tobin, how’s the ankle?” the team doctor asks her. Tobin’s up on a table, her feet overhanging it while he slides towards her on his rolling chair. “I think the therapy on it helps,” Tobin answers truthfully, “but there are days when it lets me know it’s there.” She’s referring to a bone spur in her right ankle, something she’s been dealing with since the World Cup. She gets treatment from the Thorns staff in season and now the National Team podiatrist is evaluating her. He’s looking intently at the X-rays and a couple of snaps from her latest MRI on it, comparing them to her previous ones. He turns back to her and raises his eyebrows and sighs. “Well, it’s progressed slightly in size, but if you feel you can compete with it, then we can just continue treatment.” He glances at Dawn who Tobin asked to join her today. In fact, Tobin also asked Jill to come if she could. Dawn nods.There’s a knock at the door.Jill Ellis enters. “Hi Tobin,” she greets, “sorry I’m late.” “It’s okay,” Tobin smiles, “thanks for being here.” “I will say that if you take a cleat to it, it could damage to the surrounding tissue.” He clears his throat, “You’ve played on it for over season, but the chance exists.” “How long would I be out if I get the surgery?” Tobin asks. “About twelve weeks.” He answers. Tobin’s shoulders slump. She looks at him. “I couldn’t do it now and still rehab my back, can I?” He shakes his head. “You’d miss the entire season.” Tobin sighs. “The Thorns can take it this year. I want to get back.”Dawn lays a hand on her shoulder, “Then we’ll get you back as long as the ankle holds up. But you may have to consider getting the surgery next year. With the qualifiers coming
up, the team needs you.” “Alright, why don’t we do that?” Tobin asks, “Let’s just plan for it.” “It’ll have to be in January,” Jill says, “I want you to have some time off to relax and do your thing. It’s important to get away from soccer for a while, even though you’ve been out for so long already. If you’re available, I might call you up so you can work with the newbies in November, maybe get you some limited minutes as well. I want to limit your minutes as we we ramp up for qualifiers. I put a lot of miles on you last year so I want to limit them for the friendles when I can. Also, you’ll be re-allocated then and the insurance will cover it. So, you’ll probably miss the She Believes Cup, but that will be fine. I want you healthy for qualifiers, but most importantly, I want you pain free. I see how it hurts you after practices and games, I don’t want you suffering like that. I certainly don’t want you relying on medications for pain for an extended time. For you to play like you did last season with this going on, I’m shocked you didn’t tap out.” “Also,” the doctor adds. “the cortisone shots will begin to lose their effectiveness too. You can’t rely on them forever.” “Alright,” Tobin nods, “we have a game plan.” “You come back here if it gets worse, I don’t want it to progress any further, okay?” he cautions. “You bet.” Tobin says, “Thanks.” “Anytime,” he grins and stands up. “I’ll add this to her file for you Dawn.” He exits the room. “Thanks, doc,” Dawn replies. Tobin slips her flip flops on and stands up. “Tobin,” Jill says, moving a step closer, “don’t worry about your spot. I’m trying many new faces in all of the positions, but at the end of the day, you come back healthy, they have to take it away from you. You and Carli bring something special to this team, it would be hard to replicate those qualities.” “Thanks Jill,” Tobin smiles. Her words don’t make feel Tobin feel that the spot is just hers. Her work ethic won’t allow it and Jill knows this. “Hey, did you see that play a while back with Sinc and the dummy pass?” she asks both of them, “I like that unexpectedness in the game setting.” “She rocked it,” Jill replies smiling, “we can get you and Pinoe to add it, the others, it comes more slowly.” “It’s a Brazilian thing,” Dawn laughs. “But I also like how the Thorns back pass to the back of the box,” Jill adds, “I want to incorporate that more into our game plan.” The three exit the doctor’s office and head to lunch, all the while chattering about new plays, new formations and great plays throughout the NWSL. Tobin has a very good relationship with Jill and Dawn. It began with her first call ups under Pia when Jill was an assistant coach. Tobin would innocently come to Jill asking questions about plays with such a natural knowledge of soccer, it blew Jill away. Sometimes Jill would shake her head and look at Dawn, both finding it hard to believe this goofy nineteen year-old kid had such knowledge. Jill and Dawn accepted Tobin for all her quirks, knowing she had a brilliant soccer mind. Tobin is smart as well, she keeps this relationship very separate than that with her teammates. She never wants them to think she has the coaches ear because clearly Jill will do what she thinks is best for the team. Tobin never approaches her about individual players or performances and Jill never asks. It is always about new plays, adding an unpredictability to their offense and defense.It doesn’t bother most of the team knowing Tobin would be talking about soccer to Jill and Dawn, she talks soccer to anyone who would listen. It isn’t that Tobin is one dimensional, she can converse intelligently on a broad amount of topics, but get her started on soccer, well, she just goes to another level. “That goal was so rad!” Tobin exclaims, smiling broadly at Allie through the screen. It’s a few hours after the Thorns match, the Thorns beating Washington by one goal. “Yeah!” Allie smiles, “right place, right time.” “You played a really great match,” Tobin says sincerely, “you made some amazing passes.” “Thanks,” Allie demures, “I appreciate it.” “He moved you up,” Tobin observes, “I was yelling when you scored.” “Can’t give him a reason to keep me out of the lineup.” Allie replies, echoing the statement their college coach would often repeat. Anson would occasionally call players in to his office, evaluate them, sometimes none too kindly, and finish up with saying that. Tobin nods, remembering some of her visits in his office. They chat easily as best friends do, about everything and nothing until Allie begins yawning. “Alright Har,” Tobin says, “I’ll talk to you soon, keep being a beast.” “Okay Harry,” Allie says, yawning again, “you kick some ass in rehab. You’re ramping up this week?” “Yeah,” Tobin nods, “Monday I can start doing muscle specific lifting. No core work.”“Good,” she grins, “lose those scrawny arms.” Tobin laughs, “The guns will be back soon,” she laughs. “The guns,” Allie mutters, shaking her head. “Love ya, Har, goodnight.” “Love you, too, talk to you soon.” Tobin signs off. August 24, 2017 These last few weeks have been Hell. Tobin’s been exhausted, pushing her body to the limit, doing everything she can to get her fitness up. Her back is feeling great and her ankle isn’t awful and she’s anxious to get back to the Thorns. She keeps feeling that she’s let down Allie by not being there, even though they both know there’s nothing either of them could do about the situation. She just feels things would be better for Al if she were there. Maybe run interference between her and Mark. She knows Allie can lose her temper sometimes and maybe make comments she later regrets. Allie always dismisses it when Tobin mentions it, knowing how awful Tobin feels about it. The last three weeks for Allie have been a disaster. First, she only played fifteen minutes against Houston, then she got a call that her grandfather was placed in hospice care and she should get back home to say goodbye. A day before she was to leave, she got the call he passed away. Then, after being with the family for the wake, they take her out for her birthday and her social media post about it enrages fans about missing a game to celebrate her birthday. It enrages Mark as well. The last straw was being the airport and getting a call that her father had a heart attack, so she missed her flight and stayed with her family while her Dad had successful heart surgery. To make matters worse, she gets the cold shoulder from a few players and Mark when she returns to Portland. Tobin is snuggled in bed, barely awake enough to answer her phone. It’s Allie, in tears. “Healthy scratch,” she cries “he’s so pissed at me.” “I can’t play like this,” Allie continues. Tobin’s soft assurances fall on deaf ears. “I asked Gavin to trade me.” Tobin’s stomach drops, she feels responsible. She feels if she had been there it wouldn’t have come to this. “What are you thinking, Harry?” Allie asks quietly. Tobin sniffs, the tears starting, “I’m so sad.” She says, “Sad about how awful you’ve been feeling, sad that we’re so far apart right now and I can’t hug you.” She sniffles again, “I’m
sad I can’t be there for you.” “You’re always here for me, silly,” Allie insists, wiping her eyes, “we can be continents apart and we’ll always be there for each other.” Tobin wipes her eyes, “I just wish I could be there. Being here sucks, maybe I could have helped things between you and Mark.” “No.” Allie states definitively, shaking her head, “this was, is, between me and Mark. There wasn’t anything really you could do to change the outcome.” She gives Tobin a sad smile, “You listen to me, you let me cry on your shoulder or through your phone, you let me vent and complain.” She takes a deep breath, “You asked me the hard questions and made me really think about what was happening. And you love me anyway.” Tobin nods, giving up on wiping the tears from her eyes, “I’m gonna miss you so much,” she says, her voice unsteady.“I will too,” Allie says, a soft sob escaping her lips. Tobin waits a minute. “Did Gavin say he was gonna try to move you before the end of the season?” Tobin asks, bunching the end of her sweatshirt in her hand to wipe her eyes. Then her nose. “He said he’d do what he could.” Allie shrugs, regaining her composure. “He even asked me for a list of preferred teams.” “That was nice of him,” Tobin replies, she sighs, “just the nature of the business, huh?” she smiles wryly at Allie. Allie slowly nods at her. “I’m so sorry it hasn’t worked out for you, I feel bad that you had such a rough season so far.” Tobin states. “I know,” Allie says, “but I feel good about this. As much as I love everything here,” she shrugs and takes a deep breath, “it’s time to move on.” “It’s been a good run,” Tobin grins at her. “I’d say, let’s go out with a bang.” Allie smiles, “Let’s get another Shield.” Tobin nods, there’s only four matches left, she doesn’t know how much she’ll contribute. “Have they set a timeline for you yet?” Allie asks. Tobin nods. “Well, what is it, you hairball!” Allie says, exasperated. “In ten days I should be coming back home.” Tobin replies, smiling broadly at her, eyes shining. “You’re coming home?” Allie’s eyebrows shoot up. “Yeah,” Tobin says, smiling at her, “Hey!” she says, rolling onto her side to get comfortable, “Would you be up to want to maybe go look at some condos with me when I get back?” “You’re really going to do it?” Allie knits her eyebrows together. “Yeah,” Tobin grins, “I am.” Allie insists Tobin bring her up to speed on her house plans and forty minutes later they end their call, both feeling happy that their friendship is so solid. Mark gives Allie thirty -six minutes against Houston, then thirty-three against Seattle. Punishment for partying and missing two games is the assumption. He then plays her a full ninety against Washington a week before Tobin's due back, Allie thinking maybe they’re showcasing her for a trade.Her and Tobin are both clueless to his motivation when they talk later that night. When Tobin checks in with Christine Sinclair, she’s non-committal about the issue and admits she has no idea what Mark is thinking. Tobin just wants to get back home and be with the team again. She just wants to play.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Tobin’s in the team section watching the Thorns clinch a home field playoff game with their victory over Boston. Sinc was the player of the match with her beautiful goal in the seventy-second minute to seal the win. Tobin’s excited because she’s been working hard on regaining her form and fitness level, now realizing there’s a very good chance she could get on the field to help her team thisseason. Before she left LA, Dawn had Tobin do the fitness testing, the same one the National Team does every January to see where she was at with her recovery and overall shape. Her strength and agility scores nearly matched her old scores and her endurance was off by about twenty percent. Dawn was pleased with the results, stating it was Tobin’s determination and work ethic that got her this far forward in such a time frame. Starting this upcoming week, Tobin will practice with the team and not get pulled by the training staff. She’s still getting treatment on her ankle, but that’s nothing new. Her back feels really good, but she’s not being silly about it. She makes sure she’s properly stretched before and after practice to avoid any issues. September 13, 2017 “I told you I’m buying dinner tonight,” Tobin insists as she tosses her gear bag in her trunk, Allie’s bag landing on top of hers. Allie’s leaving the next day for a mini camp and a couple of friendlies with the National Team. “Whatever,” Allie moans, “you don’t have to.” “I want to,” Tobin gives her a cheesy grin as they look across the roof of her car at each other. “Unlock the door, Hairball.” Allie demands as she repeatedly tries to open the passenger door. “Knock it off,” Tobin says mildly, pressing the key fob to unlock the vehicle. “You know this will be exhausting,” Allie warns as she buckles her seatbelt. Tobin looks at her, “We’re walking through three places,” she says as she buckles up and starts the car, “what’s so exhausting about that?” Tobin yawns loudly while they’re stopped at a light. She’s driving Allie back home after having dinner and seeing the condos. “What’re you so exhausted for?” Allie says sarcastically. “Ow!” she cries rubbing her arm from where Tobin punched it. “Silence, you.” Tobin smirks. Allie laughs, “So, any of them stand out?” Tobin shrugs as she drives, “It’s kind of hard,” she admits, “knowing it’s, like, so permanent, you know?” Allie nods. September 20, 2017 Tobin’s excited. She’s traveling with the team and Mark has told her she’ll see some minutes in the game. She’s so excited, she shows up to Providence Park almost an hour before she needs to be there to meet the bus for the airport. Feeling fidgety, she decides to take a walk and calm her nerves. She sets the timer on her phone giving her twenty minutes before she turns back. She heads south of the park into the residential area, looking at the old homes, it’s one of the oldest neighborhoods in Portland. The sidewalk is shaded by the large trees, many of the homes have been converted into businesses, though some are private residences. She wonders what it would like to live in this area, strolling along, thinking about backyard barbeques, hanging out in a garage working on an art project or doing some gardening in a yard. She turns down a street and only realizes halfway down that it’s a dead end. She spies the house at the end of the block and she stops. It’s amazing. She quickens her pace to stand in front of the high wrought iron fence, looking at the home. As she looks up at the two story home, she feels drawn to it. She can’t explain it, but it almost feels familiar to her. It’s a soft gray brick exterior with dark grey shutters around each window. It has five stairs up to a long porch that extends across the front of the entire house. It has a turret jutting into the sky from the back of the house. The street is quiet, you can hardly hear the traffic from the road she turned off. Tobin looks to her left and sees a sign on the fence. A realtor’s sign. Intrigued, she pulls out her phone and snaps a photo of it. Then she snaps a few photos of the house. Her phone goes off, indicating it’s time to head back to the park and when she turns to her right, she’s greeted by the face of woman, she’s just a few years older than her, crouched down on the next property, looking at her. She is obviously tending to her plantings that border her walkway, but she’s looking at Tobin with an intensity that makes her uncomfortable. “Don’t do it.” The woman calls out, her voice edged with an emotion Tobin can’t place. “Forget you ever saw that place.” She warns. Tobin nods at her and hurries away, shaking her shoulders and rolling her neck as she walks as if to shake off the weird vibe from the woman. She breaks into a slow jog so she’s not late, throws her bags in the underside of the bus and slides into her seat next to Allie. Allie looks at her curiously, knowing something is up. “What’s with you, Harry?” Allie asks, eyes narrowing at Tobin’s fidgeting. She knows she’s excited about playing but this is something different. Tobin glances around the bus before leaning over to Allie, “I saw a place,” she says quietly. “A condo?” Allie questions. Tobin shakes her head as she’s messing with her phone. Allie goes to her own phone, knowing Tobin will share when she’s ready. They’re silent on the bus ride for a few minutes until Allie feels an elbow poking her and Tobin is saying “dude” over and over. “What, dork!” Allie hisses, angling over and rubbing her ribs. “Look!” Tobin says, shoving her phone at her. Allie sees this crazy huge house, it’s beautiful but not at all what she expected Tobin to be thinking about. “What is this?” she asks her as she scans over the photos from the realtor. The interior looks amazing, a large foyer, the living room with intricate wood panels, the updated kitchen that looks unreal. What looks like the master bath completed. A half bath on the first floor. A fucking library. Then she sees the upstairs, those rooms under renovation. The unfinished bedrooms, the walls with peeling wallpaper. From what she can tell, maybe the bathrooms on the second floor are updated but that’s it. “This looks like a money pit,” Allie states, “you’d have to do so much work on this.” Tobin’s nodding her head and smiling like crazy. “Look at the price.” She says excitedly. Allie frowns, “Harry, something big is wrong with this house if this is the asking price.” Tobin looks at her, remembering what the woman said to her as she stood in front of the house. “But the listing says it has a new roof, the foundation is fine, the plumbing is brand new, new furnace, what could be wrong with it?” she questions. Allie shrugs, “I don’t know,” she says, “it just seems too good to be true.” Tobin deflates and sinks back into her seat, taking her phone from Allie. She’s looking at the house, she wants it and doesn’t know why. Reason would say that something is off about it, but she just sees that it’s under her budget and she could easily afford to put money into it to finish it. Allie feels bad for shutting it down so quickly when she sees Tobin’s reaction. “I mean, it’s worth it to check it out, right?” she suggests, “You could go look at it and really see what the deal is. I’d go with you.” The truth is, she doesn’t want Tobin to go alone, get excited and make an offer without thoroughly investigating all that needs to be done to it.Tobin bites her lower lip as she stares at the house, “Yeah, maybe we can do that when we get back.” She says it quietly and something about her tone makes Allie feel confused. It’s as if all of her enthusiasm about it is gone. Tobin exits the page and puts her phone in her pocket. She closes her eyes and relaxes for the rest of the ride. Tobin’s staying with Ashlyn for a couple of days before the match, so Allie doesn’t see much of her. When she does, Tobin is a little subdued, not as outgoing as her normal self. When asked, Tobin just admits she’s a little nervous, it’s been so long since she’s played. Allie doesn’t buy it, but shakes it off as she’s trying not to get too upset from Mark basically giving her the silent treatment. Others notice their chemistry is off, but all of them are focused on getting a win and trying to get the shield. The day before they play, Tobin elbows her as they eat dinner. “You still want to look at the house?” she asks her.“Yeah, sure,” Allie replies, “when?” “Wednesday night? The twenty-seventh?” Tobin says eagerly. “My Dad is coming in for the game and he said he wants to see it too.” Allie checks her schedule quickly and nods with a smile, typing it in. “I can’t wait!” “Thanks, Har,” Tobin says, “it means a lot for you to come look at it.” They draw against Orlando, neither team was able to break through and score. Both teams are frustrated, Orlando is on the cusp of playoffs and they want to get in. Tobin’s frustrated as well, wanting the team to get points and take the Shield from the Courage. She’s happy she got thirty glorious minutes on the field. She was shocked at the applause the Orlando fans gave her when she entered the pitch, that was a nice surprise. Allie played a solid sixty minutes, earning herself a yellow but doing her best to make plays. They head back to Portland knowing they will face Chicago to determine who they play in the semi-final. September 27, 2017 “Tobin, you should make an offer on it if you really want it,” her Dad says after the waitress left with their dinner orders. Tobin was treating dinner to Allie and her Dad at a very nice restaurant after the walk through. They were in a quiet corner, away from others. “The bones on that house are fantastic,” her Dad continues, “everything they’ve done so far has been first rate.” He’s a contractor so he knows what he’s talking about. “I’d still
have an inspector come through and make a complete list of what needs attention, but the value of this is surprising.” “Why would they list it so cheap then?” Allie asks, wanting to know why it’s so low priced. “Well, the realtor said the previous owner has some medical and financial difficulties. Medical probably led to financial. They can’t complete the work, so they need to dump the property.” He replies, “Most likely for what they purchased it for or a little less.” “You really think it’s a good idea?” Tobin asks nervously. “If I lived here and saw this opportunity,” her Dad smiles at her, “I’d jump on this.” “I didn’t think it’d be so big on the inside,” Allie adds, “or have so many rooms.” “You could easily invest money into the rehab, wait a year or two and maybe double your money.” Her Dad advises. “If you didn’t want to live there anymore it would still be a solid investment.” Tobin nods as their drinks arrive. She waits for the server to open the bottle of Pinot Noir, handing Tobin the cork and then pouring a taste in her glass for her to sample. It’s good. Tobin nods and she pours for the others, leaving the bottle in the center of the table. Her dad laughs, “I never thought I’d see the day of you being such an aficionado!” “That’s what France does to a gal!” Allie laughs. Tobin raises her glass, “Thank you both for coming with to help me make one of the biggest decisions in my life. Cheers!” They clink their glasses and enjoy their night together. September 28, 2017 Tobin meets with her realtor before practice and puts in a bid for the house. When she gets to the park, Allie sees her in the locker room. She looks pale as she comes back from the bathrooms. “Are you alright?” she asks her, concerned by how awful Tobin looks. Tobin gives her a small smile and nod, “Just nervous.” “Did you just throw up?” Allie asks quietly, not wanting to cause a scene. Tobin nods. “I put in a bid for the house.” Tobin states quietly as she grabs her toothbrush and tube of toothpaste to go and brush her teeth. Allie sits at her locker for a minute, contemplating what Tobin just shared. Tobin looks much better when she returns, placing her items back in her little basket, then preparing for practice. As they walk out together, Allie nudges her, “Did he say when you might hear back?” “Don’t know,” Tobin admits, “I hope soon.” Practice is tough, the players working hard on positional situations, repeating set pieces, going through their plays. Tobin notices the vibe that Mark gives Allie, but Allie just goes along through practice as if it doesn’t bother her. Somehow word has spread that Allie wants out and a few other players are quiet towards her. They don’t know the full story and they don’t know her very well, but they are judging her just on what they hear and see on social media. It isn’t fair, but Allie doesn’t want to get in to it with them. They’ve got a job to do and she isn’t about the rock the boat and make waves. This game is too important and she wants to able to contribute. Tobin bites her tongue a few times, struggling to keep an even keel when she over hears Mark say something not so nice about Allie to one of the assistants. He catches her eye and knows she heard but just passively turns away. She’s pissed off, but she gets back into practice and loses herself in the rhythm, repeating her plays, making passes and working on her corners. She throws her boots into her locker, shocking those around her. She’s angry all over again about how unfair the situation is. She’s already missing Allie and she isn’t even gone. Sinc comes over to her, taking her elbow and guiding her over to a quiet corner. “You’ve got to keep it together dude,” she says softly, “I know it’s hard, I’m struggling myself.” Sinc knows what’s going on. Allie had told her when they went out to eat a couple of months ago and she had filled her in on what was happening. “I just don’t get it,” Tobin laments, “why did it change?” “I don’t know,” Christine says quietly, “it just did.” She slings an arm around Tobin’s shoulders, “And we can’t let it distract us, no matter how much it hurts us.” Tobin looks up at her, nodding slowly, “Yeah, I know.” “We gotta stick together,” she says, squeezing Tobin’s shoulder, “not let it get to us. And not let it affect the team.” Tobin straightens up, nodding her head, knowing Christine is keeping the big picture in mind, taking a deep breath, “You’re right,” she breathes out, “I just feel so helpless,” Sinc tilts her head at her, “You aren’t helpless, man,” she says, “you’re Allie’s rock, if she didn’t have you, she’d have been either gone or riding the bench the whole season. You keep her in check, you help her so much, you don’t even know it.” They both sigh, aware of how shitty the situation is. “We can win this whole thing.” Sinc says, “Me and you, let’s get this this for Al,”“Yeah,” Tobin says, giving her a smile. September 30, 2017 They beat Chicago pretty easily. Hayley Raso scores in the second minute off a terrible clearance from Chicago’s backup goalie. Chicago was resting most of their starters and Portland wasn’t so they made mincemeat of them with a final of three goals to one. Both Tobin and Allie played the second half, Tobin getting chills down her spine when her name was announced and she stepped on the pitch for the first time this season. The Portland fans went crazy, the noise was so loud the players couldn’t hear each other on the field for at least five minutes. Tobin almost lost it over how awesome the feeling was. This was her team. She was so grateful to wear this jersey and be a part of this. Nowhere in the league were there more passionate fans than here. This was her city. This was her home. It felt so good to be back. Her and Allie did their handshake and dab before they entered the match, both knowing this was probably the last time they would be on this field together wearing the same jersey. It was bittersweet and the look and sad smiles they gave each other conveyed all the emotions they couldn’t express. The team hit the nearby bar after the match for a few drinks to celebrate the win. Tobin sat in a corner, soaking it all in. Part of her felt she didn’t do anything to earn the right to celebrate, she was out for the whole season practically. She was proud of her teammates, but just didn’t feel totally connected right now. Sonnet comes up to her, a grin on her face. “Why so down, Tobs?” she asks, sliding into the seat next to her. Tobin shrugs, “Not down, just taking it all in,” she states, giving her a small smile. Emily just looks at her thoughtfully. “You know,” she says as she takes a swig of her beer, “you’re a big reason why we’ve come this far.” Tobin’s head whips around to look at her, “What?” Emily nods casually, “None of us wanted to disappoint you.” Tobin takes that in, not completely understanding it. “You worked so hard to come back, we wanted you to come back for a chance to win.” She says, leaving her seat, “Don’t think we don’t know how important you are to this team.” She says and walks away, bouncing over to the dance floor, getting grabbed by A.D.Tobin ponders that as she slowly sips her beer. Huh, she thinks, that’s interesting. Allie plops down next to her. “How’s it going Harry?” she asks, giving her a subdued smile. “Pretty good,” Tobin smiles and nods at her. “Nice reception you got tonight,” Allie comments, looking out at her teammates. “Yeah,” Tobin says, not knowing where Allie’s going with this. Allie turns to her, “This is where you belong Harry,” she says seriously. “Don’t ever let whatever happened between me and Mark derail what you’ve got here, okay? Portland is you and you are Portland. Sinc, too.” Tobin just looks at her, trying to gauge her emotions. “Yeah.” She says quietly. “So, buy your house, meet a nice girl, settle down and open that art studio you’ve been dreaming about.” Allie states, a sad smile on her face. “Har,” Tobin begins, tears forming. “Don’t,” is all Allie says, sticking her hand out at her, “I’ll be fine. I’ve got Bati and a new chance coming up. I’ll be fine.” “You’ll bloom wherever you’re planted.” Tobin says slowly, wiping away a tear. Allie hugs her hard, nearly knocking over Tobin’s beer bottle. “I love you Harry,” she says, gripping her tightly. “We’ve got two matches left to go out on top.” She releases and puts her arm around her. “I’m heading out, do you want me to drop you off?” “Nah,” Tobin says shaking her head, “I’m gonna stick around a little bit longer. Thanks.” Allie slides out of her seat, running a hand through her hair. “I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?” “Yeah,” Tobin give her a grin. Her grin fades as she watches Allie give her goodbyes and leave the bar. She’s lost in her thoughts, staring down at her beer, picking at the label when she notices there’s people standing in front of her. Startled, she looks up to see many of her teammates, looking at her, concern on their faces. Lindsey sits down next to her and Amandine sits on the other side. Meghan Cox clears her throat nervously, looking around at everyone before getting poked by an elbow from Dagny. “So, Tobin,” Meg begins, her voice showing her nerves, “you know, uh, we just wanted you know that even though you weren’t here with us on the field most of the year, uh, you were with us here every day.” Tobin scrunches her face at them in confusion, watching as Dagny pulls up a battered piece of poster board. She slides it across the table, Tobin lifting her beer so it doesn’t spill. It’s a crude drawing of a bear with a goofy grin and ponytail wearing a jersey with the number seventeen on it. In block letters across the top it reads ‘Be Fierce Ice Bear!’ A reference to Coach Angerer’s confusing inspirational speech about polar bears and their ferocity towards playing soccer. The speech was given before their first preseason match resulting in hilarity at the language barrier. Apparently, Nadine had stuck with it all season, improving on how polar bears were so adept at soccer and how they would beat their competition. The sign still has tape on the ends, folded over, dirty fingerprints on the lower portion of it. There’s written out stats from Tobin’s 2016 season on one side, then words on the other. Words like patience, opportunity, grit, heart, passion, determination. It also says some phrases like ‘Ya gotta work for it,’ ‘Be chill,’ and others that Tobin recognizes as things she has said to her teammates over the years. She looks up at them. “Every day,” Dagny says with her clipped accent, “every day we touch this coming in and out of locker room. You were with us, here,” she says, tapping her chest over her heart. They’re all smiling at her, Tobin can feel her face getting hot, the tears forming in her eyes. Lindsey touches her forearm, “You ready to finish this with another Championship?” Tobin nods, swallowing hard, unable to speak as she smiles at her team. Her sisters. Her friends. “Shots on me!” Kling shouts suddenly, sending a wink at Tobin, knowing she’s uncomfortable and needs a minute to compose herself, “Who’s in?” The players drift away, many of them tapping the sign as they leave and giving Tobin a smile. Amandine leans over, “I love this team,” she sighs sadly, “I didn’t think I would so much. I didn’t think it would hurt so bad to leave.” She gets up slowly, walking towards the bar, yelling out something in French Tobin couldn’t make out. Tobin fingers the sign, thinking about how amazing this group of women are and how privileged she is to play with them. She stands up, finishing her only beer of the night, grabbing the sign and heading towards Sinc. Sinc gives her a head nod. “You good?” Tobin nods, “Yeah,” she says, leaning in and hugging her, “I’m good.” “See you tomorrow.” Sinc says as they both look at their team having fun. “Later,” Tobin says and exits the bar, carrying the sign that means more to her than she can ever express. The bar was only a couple of blocks from the park and her apartment so, Tobin decides to walk a little to clear her head. She somehow ends up on the dead end street, standing in front of the house she’s put a bid on. It looks a little intimidating at night, completely dark, all angles and slightly imposing, but Tobin attributes that to the lack of a street light and seeing too many horror movies. She feels at peace, as if all of the pieces of her life are coming together at just the right time. She slowly moves away, glancing over to see the neighbor sitting on her porch, blowing smoke from a cigarette or pipe. She can’t make it out in the darkness, she just sees the glowing tip of whatever she’s smoking. She hurries down the street, a little unnerved by the woman, knowing she was watching her daydream on the sidewalk, but shakes it off as she strolls back to her apartment. Once she settles into bed, she reviews her day. Allie. She sighs as she rolls over on her side. Allie telling her to meet a nice girl. She rolls over on her back. Allie’s told her more than once about being worried that Tobin hasn’t really connected with anyone since she was in France and dating Shirley. Tobin’s never had an answer for her, she doesn’t know why she hasn’t met anyone. There’s been a few girls she’s dated but most of them were almost like groupies. Looking to go out and do exciting things and been seen with her or just get in her pants. She’s not in to one night stands for that exact reason why. She guesses that why she’s shied away from putting herself out there, feeling like she has a target on her back.She sighs and rolls over again and thinks about surfing to clear her mind and get some sleep. Many players went to Christine’s place the next day to watch the match between Orlando and North Carolina. When the whistle blew and they knew they’d face Orlando, they were ready. October 7, 2017 Tobin rolls out of bed, still sleepy from a poor night’s sleep. She shuffles to her bathroom, using the toilet and then heading out to her kitchen. It’s cool in the apartment, she stops to grab a hoodie from off the back of the couch and slings it on. She contemplates for only a moment what her breakfast should be. She sighs and takes out the eggs, looking through her crisper drawer for some veggies to add. She makes her breakfast in silence, not even turning on any music, trying to shake the tiredness from her. She decides to make herself a cup of coffee, she doesn’t drink it much on game days, but she knows she has enough time to let it process through her system. She plops down on her couch making sure not to spill her coffee, setting the mug on her end table and grabbing the remote. She turns on ESPN to catch up with the sporting headlines as she eats. She’s doing what she calls her ‘hard chill’ which consists of doing as little as possible. She lounges on the couch after eating, lying there, scrolling mindlessly through the channels. She settles on a Manchester City game, turning the volume low and decides to nap. She lays there for half the match before deciding to just go back to bed and get under the covers. She saunters back to her room, making sure to grab a water, chugging half of it before she reaches her bed. She flops down, pulling the covers up, rolling to her side, grabbing her phone and looking at Twitter. She doesn’t have her contacts in nor has she put on her glasses so she abandons her phone and tries to sleep. She falls asleep easily, entering into a dream about walking through the doors of her new house and being greeted by a comforting feeling. She walks down the halls, letting her hand trail along the wall, feeling the uneven original plaster, marveling at the woodwork and detail in room. This place totally reminds her of her grandparents’ house, the high ceilings, the intricate carvings. Tobin doesn’t understand why she likes it so much. It’s not really her style, she prefers something more modern. But there’s something about this house that draws her in. She doesn’t know if it’s because it’s unfinished and she can put her stamp on it or what. But she knows she wants it.
She finds herself in the basement, it’s unfinished. When they did the walk through, they were only down there for a short time and didn’t get to see much. In her dream, Tobin walks towards the back of the basement where there’s a workbench piled high with tools, cans of paint and other equipment. She opens the top drawer of the cabinet and removes a piece of paper. She sees it’s a list, hand written in an elegant manner with room names and color schemes. The paper looks old, the edges frayed, and it feels like a high quality stationary paper. She places the paper back in the drawer, turning to look around the workshop area. On the wall there’s a small rack with keys, she reaches and touches one, noticing there’s no tag attached to indicate which lock it would open. She moves deeper into the basement, pulling the string down on the bare bulbs to illuminate the area as she goes. She sees a chest of drawers that looks cool. It has clean lines, the finish looks decent, she’s just about to open a drawer when she hears someone saying ‘Hairy,’ over and over again. She looks around to discover the walls have dark hair growing from them. She moves to leaves the basement and the hair is growing from the walls, longer black strands touching her, trying to grab her. She gets to the main floor and the entire interior is overgrown with hair. She struggles to get to the front door, fighting against the hair pulling at her, trying to pull her into the walls. She’s shouting, trying to run for the door when she feels hair grab at her shoulder. She twists to pull herself away when suddenly she wakes and sees she’s in her room. Allie standing over her, her hand on her shoulder, looking concerned. “Harry, are you alright?” she asks, looking at her with scared eyes. “You were having a nightmare.” Tobin’s sitting up in her own bed, in her own room, now realizing she was dreaming. She’s breathing heavy, sweating profusely, and trying to figure what just happened. She looks up at Allie, “Hey,” she says, in between breaths, “what’s up?” Allie sits on the bed next to her, “I was calling you and you weren’t waking up,” she explains quietly, “you were thrashing around and yelling out,” Tobin rubs her face with her hands, surprised to feel wetness from her eyes. “I had such a weird dream,” she murmurs. “You okay?” Allie asks, her concern evident. “Yeah,” Tobin nods, “I was walking through the new house,” she explains, “and then the place started growing hair from the walls and it was getting super long and trying to get me. I was fighting my way out and then I woke up.” “Wow!” Allie exclaims, her eyebrows raised, “that would explain why you were all over the place,” she says, gesturing to Tobin’s bed. The covers are strewn half off the bed, her pillows on the floor.“Dude, it was so weird,” Tobin shakes her head, “what time is it?” she questions. “Lunch time.” Allie states, rising from the bed. “Get showered, I’ll pick your outfit.” Tobin nods, sliding her legs over and rising from the bed. She heads to her bathroom, glancing back to see Allie picking up her pillows and pulling at her comforter. “Tell me why I’m so dressed up again?” Tobin questions as they walk down the sidewalk heading towards the players entrance of Providence Park. They had their lunch, Allie insisting on hitting a few stores to shop her nervous energy off. It was like a normal game day for them. “Because this is the last time we’re doing this,” Allie says, elbowing her and giving her smile, “and you dressing nicely is your gift to me.” Tobin smiles at her as they walk, seeing the photographers clicking away at them. “I think I’m overdressed, compared to you.” She grins, glancing down at her crisp white button down, her black dress slacks, boots and grey sweater. Allie, on the other hand is wearing black ripped jeans, an oversized sweatshirt and beat up sneakers. Allie slides her sunglasses down her nose to look over them at her, “We can’t both be dressed so hot, Harry,” she says, giving her a sly grin, “we would break the internet.” Tobin barks out a laugh, shaking her head. The game starts fast, Orlando keeps them on their toes. The Thorns are moving as one unit, everything is going well, although the unpredictability of Marta has them playing more defensively. They score in the twelfth minute when Tobin flicks a bouncing ball to Sinc who passes it to Kling on the wing. She delivers with a beautiful cross that sends the ball curling into the box and meets the outstretched foot of Amandine who knocks it past Harris for the first goal of the match. Minutes later, Tobin gets a free kick midway from the box and sideline, sending the ball curling low across the near post that Sonnet deflects into the goal. In the twenty third minute, Marta sends a ball into the box that Pressley pops along to find Kennedy to get one back. The Pride threaten again in the thirty second minute with Marta dancing in front of Sykes and then blowing past her for a cross that gets nearly cleared with Pressley sending a rocket just wide. During halftime, Mark praises them for their performance and composure, repeating his game plan of attack. Tobin glances at Allie and sees her listening intently, wearing her sub pinnie. Tobin struggles to push her thoughts back to the game, focusing on what now Sinc is saying before they head back out to the pitch. Emily Menges puts on a defensive highlight play blocking a goal in the fifty third minute, saving the Thorns from the match becoming tied. In the seventy second minute, Franch begins the play, sliding the ball over to Menges who sees Lindsey in open space. With her head up, Lindsey sees Raso running free. She sends the ball down, dropping just a few feet in front of her as she speeds into the box, having Harris on a 1 v 1. Hayley lets one loose as she slides to the turf with a shot that’s just out of Harris’ reach for goal number three. It’s Hayley’s first playoff goal and Tobin couldn’t be happier for her. Tobin comes out of the game in the eighty first minute with Nadia coming on for her. Less than a minute later, Nadia’s bringing the ball forward towards the box, seeing Sinc’s waving hand on the far side and she sends the ball over. It nearly gets cleared away from a header from Edmonds who just misses the ball which lands at Christine’s feet who settles it instantly and shoots one past Harris. The stadium becomes deafening with the noise, red smoke blowing, fans screaming in excitement. Allie comes on for Amandine right after the goal, but the game is in the bag. The Thorns move into their possession and keep away time wasting mode, burning off precious minutes from the clock. Kling gets a chance to score late but sends it wide. After they shake hands with their opponents, the Thorns gather to thank their fans. Franch somehow gets a hold of an Ice Bear flag, running across the pitch waving it as she goes. It’s a special moment for everyone in Providence Park to say goodbye to Nadia and Amandine. Tobin is interviewed after the match, explaining how awesome it feels to be back in front of their fans and being able to win here instead of repeating last season’s heart breaking playoff defeat. She talks about how the team lifts her up and just being in the locker room and feeding off their energy makes her play harder. She talks about how the second goal lifted the team and the fans to a higher level, allowing the Thorns to impose their will over the Pride. She finishes speaking by explaining how they had a great week of training that seemed to take the stress off them and their need to carry that momentum into the final.
They stay on the pitch for almost two hours after the match, slowly drifting into the locker room, seeking treatment, showering and leaving. Allie is gone long before Tobin even gets out of her treatment, poking her head in the training room to say a quick goodbye. Tobin debates about calling or texting her to see what she’s doing for the night and then thinks maybe she shouldn’t. She goes home, turning down some offers to hit a bar or go out to eat, opting to pick up something to eat on her way home and just relax by herself. After setting her bag down once she’s in her apartment and dropping her keys in on the table by the door, she sighs to herself. Maybe this is why I’m single, she thinks. But she feels tired, her ankle is sore and her legs are tight, this is the most she’s played all season and she gave everything she’s had. She’s done all of her stretching and puts her massage leg boots on to pump up her circulation and get the lactic acid out. She’s done everything she has to do so she won’t feel like a truck hit her tomorrow. She finds herself watching some HGTV show about decorating and it makes her wonder if she’ll hear about her offer on the house soon. It makes her anxious. The not knowing. She’s always had this laid back vibe, but she likes to have her ducks in a row and know exactly what’s going on. She went dinner with her Dad the night before, excitedly discussing the house. He offered to come back and help out when she gets it. She was grateful for his offer. From all of her years on the road, playing far from home, she’s always had her big plans made in advance. When she would visit family, when she would vacation, when she would train. Now, having this house thing dangle in front of her, it’s setting her plans a little awry. If she gets the house, the closing would be in a few weeks. That could be the middle of November and she might be called in for camp. They have some friendlies coming up. She’d know if she was going to camp by the end of October. That camp would be about ten days or so with the two matches against Canada. Then there’s her apartment. She’ll have to see about maybe getting an extension on her lease, depending on how much work the house needs before she can move in. Just from what she saw, her focus should be on the master bedroom. If anything more important needs to be done first, that will delay her moving in before the end of the year. She wants to be in the house before January because she knows she’ll be having ankle surgery. It actually works out perfect because the master bedroom is on the first floor in the back behind the study. She’ll probably be on crutches for at least a month and then have to rehab and that would limit anything she could do in the house. She decides her focus should be on the master bedroom and then whatever else would be a bonus before her surgery. She’ll just see how it goes. When she finishes eating, she brings her dish to the sink, rinsing it out and putting it in the dishwasher. She fetches her house notebook and scribbles down the dates of upcoming events and feels better that she has a loose time line. Now all she has to do is hear back if they accepted her offer. October 9, 2017 That call comes on Monday while she was floating in the pool at her apartment as part of her recovery. She saw the missed call and voicemail when she grabbed her phone to head back up to her place. Her palms are sweating as she hits the button to listen to the message. She calls Jerry back to confirm his message. “They accepted?” she asks incredulously. “Yes, they did, congratulations!” he replies, “I’ll let you know when the closing date is set. It should be a few weeks.” “Wow,” Tobin says, still not quit believing it, “yeah, okay, that sounds good.” “I’m very happy for you, you got an amazing deal.” He says as they end their call. Tobin sits in shock at her kitchen table until the chill from being in the pool sends her to her bathroom to shower and get dressed. Her first call is to her father. Then her Mom. Then Allie. “You got the house!” Allie says just after Tobin says hello. “Yeah!” Tobin answers excitedly, “can you believe it?” “No, I can’t,” Allie laughs, “my Harry is a homeowner? No way!” “I’m so excited!” Tobin proclaims, “I have no idea what I’m going to do, but I’m excited.” “Well,” Allie states, “you have the list from your inspector, you could start going over that.” She suggests. “Yeah,” Tobin agrees, “maybe you can look it over with me on the flight tomorrow?” “That sounds great, Har!” Allie agrees happily, “Congratulations!” “Thanks,” Tobin says, “now I just hope everything goes through.” She’s nervous about the closing and hoping everything goes fine. “It will,” Allie predicts, “I can feel it.” “I hope you’re right.” Tobin says nervously, she doesn’t want to get completely excited until she has the keys to the place in her hands. Even though she’s still not trying to get too excited, she prints the house photos she took from off her phone, organizing them in an old binder she found. She makes a copy of the inspection report, adding that to it. She places her house notebook in the pocket of the binder so all of her notes are now in one place. She stuffs the binder in her backpack and decides to call her sister while she packs. “Tobin!” Perry says in greeting. “Hey Per,” Tobin replies, “how are you?” “Good,” she replies, “I hear congratulations are in order.” “How’d you hear?” Tobin asks surprised. “Mom called.” “Ah,” Tobin says, knowing her Mom wouldn’t be able to contain her excitement. “So, is there a closing date yet?” Perry asks. “Nah, he’ll let me know.” Tobin replies. They talk about the house as Tobin packs, chattering back and forth about all of the things Tobin wants to do and how she can find the time to do them. When she finishes packing, she ends her call with Perry and gets ready for bed. She’s going to sleep early because she knows she’ll be dealing with jet lag from the time zone change when they get to Orlando. She’s determined to be ready to help the team win it all.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
October 13, 2017 Practice has been awesome since they’ve arrived in Florida. The Thorns are hungry and focused. All of their attention is on the Courage and how to beat them. After their dinners, players gather in Tobin and Allie’s hotel room to watch game clips of the Courage, picking apart tendencies as Sinc and Tobin point them out. Mark knows that’s what his team is doing each night. Tobin had come to him on Wednesday asking for a copy of the scouting clips, which wasn’t unusual, but he just knew her and Sinc would be prepping the women as much as possible. Tobin’s been focused on this match so much, she and Allie hardly have time to talk about anything besides the game. Allie is just as forth coming with her observations, she has a great soccer mind. “See how they gather and wait for the distribution? We need to keep our eyes open for a chance to intercept that,” Allie points out, everyone nodding with her. “Well,” Sinc says shutting off the TV, “that’s it.” She stands and faces the group assembled. “We know what we need to do. We’re not going to get many chances. We need to take advantage of every opportunity we get.” Tobin stands, “Let’s all get some good sleep tonight, have our regular morning and not be distracted by the media. Let’s play this like just another game and take those three points. We can do this.” The team files out of the room leaving Tobin and Allie. Tobin is at her dresser getting a pair of sleep shorts out. “You good, Harry?” Allie nods, “Yeah,” she says quietly. Her and Mark had some short words with each other and Tobin intervened just by walking by, glancing at Mark and walking Allie away by grabbing her arm. Allie was hot and Tobin listened as she vented about it. They both sigh at the same time and give each sad smiles. They know this is the end, the only question is where Allie will end up next season. Allie shared that her list included Orlando, Chicago, and surprisingly Sky Blue. It would be closer to New York for her.“Gavin said something will probably happen in January. Before the draft in February.” She says quietly. Tobin nods. “That’s the smart move.” She replies. “Yeah,” Allie agrees, “Bati is packing already. He didn’t ask but I know he hopes for an East Coast team.” “It would be closer to home,” Tobin reasons.“You ready?” Allie asks, she’s near the door, twisting the lock and hitting the lights. “Goodnight Har,” Tobin says sliding into her bed. “Goodnight,” Allie says as she does the same, “let’s win this tomorrow.” October 14, 2017 “Be tough, don’t get pushed around. If they give it to you, give it back.” Mark says, “Don’t let them bully you, but don’t go over the line.” He closes his notebook. “That’s it. Go get them. Make Portland proud.” The players make their way out of the locker room and filter to the pitch to begin their warmups. Tobin’s tying her shoe when she hears it. “She’ll be lucky to see the field today. Long is done here.” Mark says, his voice tinged with anger. Tobin looks up sharply and glares at him. She stands. “She’s done everything you asked of her. She’s played her heart out for this club.” She says heatedly, her hands balled in fists. “Tobin” Mark begins, clearly surprised she was there. “Let’s go,” Sinc says harshly, snatching Tobin’s arm and pulling her onto the pitch to jump into the warmups. “Focus on the game, Tobin.” She says gently. Tobin nods but she feels like screaming in anger. She just can’t believe how Mark could disrespect Allie so much. She’s shaking with anger. She tries her best to focus, but she’s just so mad. The team can feel her vibe, they know she’s upset. It’s obvious to them. She’s not loose and joking around, talking to the youngsters, trying to keep them calm like she normally does. Allie is next to her, juggling at ball at her. “Don’t do this Tobin.” She says quietly, “Don’t let him upset you. What’s done is done, you getting involved will only make things worse for yourself.” A tear slides from Tobin’s face as she juggles, nodding at what Allie has said. She knows the business side of sports, she knows this is the reality of things but she’s just so upset. Upset she couldn’t help Allie more. Upset she couldn’t be there and try to fix things. She’s just upset. They warm up in silence. Trying to take comfort in the routine until they’re called in to change for the game. Tobin is starting this game and she does her best to avoid Mark. Nadine Angerer finds her in the tunnel as the team lines up. “Find your focus Ice Bear.” She says gently. Tobin nods, shaking out her legs. Nadine knows what’s up. She knows how emotional Tobin is. Tobin plays like she feels. Angry. It’s only the third minute of play when Tobin goes for the ball, running in and her timing is off and she crashes into the back of Taylor Smith, sending them both to the ground hard. Smith falls on an angle, driving her shoulder into the turf, rolling in pain. As Tobin gets to her knees, she can hear her crying out in pain. Fuck, she thinks, I’m probably getting a yellow for that. She makes her way by her, giving her tap on the head. She walks away in disgust, angry at herself for being so careless. This isn’t how she plays, she doesn’t go out to hurt people. She paces around as the trainers look at Taylor, trying to get her own head straight. She watches as Taylor heads off the pitch, holding her shoulder as tears streak down her face. Fuck, Tobin shakes her head. I can’t believe I didn’t get carded. Play starts again, the Courage keeping possession for most of it. They’re playing more on the far side, away from Tobin who doesn’t get a chance to be involved. She’s happy when Taylor trots back on the pitch a few minutes later, grateful she didn’t take her out. The Courage make a run with Hatch closing in on the ball and Reynolds clears it away. It’s nine minutes in and Tobin notices Taylor is holding her arm up to keep her shoulder locked as much as possible. She feels bad. She’s still berating herself for being so stupid. It’s only seconds later when Tobin and Taylor both go up for a ball, Tobin doing everything she can to not make contact with her. She heads the ball upfield, glancing back to see Taylor on the ground, in pain, shaking her head. She knows she didn’t touch her and she watches as Taylor sits down for the trainers to come and slowly makes her way off the field. Tobin sighs and bites her lower lip as she resets for the play. On the next in ball, Kling passes it to Tobin and she flicks it over, feeling a sharp shove in her back from Hamilton who just came on for Smith. She knows it’s going to be rough. The Courage won’t let this pass without getting a couple of shots on her now.Lindsey Horan crashes into Zerboni, sending McCall down to the turf hard, rolling over in pain. Lindsey gets a stern talking to from the ref but escapes without a card. Tobin knows things are only going to get worse. The Courage will not let them get away with these hard fouls. The Courage keep possession for most of the first half. They’re tough, busting up passes, making smart plays, pressuring the Thorns at every turn. The Thorns are trying to remain calm, pick their spots to make their runs. Tobin feels her anger leaving her, realizing she can’t do anything about Allie and Mark. She has to stay and play for him. She shouldn’t get involved, but it hurts her to see Allie leave for those reasons. She’s following the play, she hasn’t had too much involvement, the Courage shutting down her side of the field pretty successfully. She knows she should have her head in the game, but she’s struggling still. It’s close to thirty-five minutes in and she’s beginning to feel her ankle a little. Tobin sets her feet to get the ball with Hamilton sliding in front of her, legs wide, sliding awkwardly to the ground, Tobin pivots to send a through ball upfield, hoping to catch Raso. The play is broken up and the Courage send the ball upfield. Tobin sees Hamilton still down, internally cringing at it, knowing it was a clean play, but if she’s involved in taking two Courage out players, she knows she’s in for it. She can hear the Courage coaches screaming at the refs, demanding that Tobin should be carded or ejected. She can hear the Courage fans chanting ‘Fuck You Tobin’, over and over again. In the fortieth minute, she trips up one of the Courage players and does get a yellow card. Minutes later, Raso come in late and knocks Zerboni over resulting in her getting a stern talking to by the ref.Raso ends up getting a yellow for a late tackle in extra time of the first half. Zerboni fouls Raso and Tobin doesn’t think it’s totally clean. Doniak slides in as Tobin is chasing the ball, coming in hard, studs up on the back of her ankle. No foul is called and Tobin is now praying the ref blows the whistle soon to end this awful half. Tobin keeps her head high as she trots into the locker room, ignoring the cat calls and profanities being directed at her. Allie grabs her in the tunnel, angrily shaking her shoulders with both hands. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” Allie yells, drawing looks from her teammates. Tobin can’t even look at her. “Get your fucking head in the game. You’re playing like a fucking thug!” Allie shouts as they enter the locker room, “What’s gotten in to you? This isn’t how you play. Use your fucking brain!” she shouts loudly in the quiet room. Tobin drops down in her seat, grabbing a water bottle, lifting it to take a sip. Allie knocks the water from her hand. She’s standing in front of her, pushing Tobin’s shoulders back so suddenly the chair goes back on two legs. The locker room is silent witnessing this exchange. “You’re better than this!” She yells, tears coming from her eyes. “Get out of your head and play the fucking game!” Tobin looks at her with wide eyes, seeing her anger and frustration. Allie turns to face the rest of the team who are watching, shocked that she’s yelling at her best friend. “You all are better than this!” She yells, spinning around to see her stunned teammates. “You need to play our game!” Allie flings her arm out, pointing to Mark, who stands there with just as much surprise on his face. “Listen to him,” she says, her voice dropping, “he’s the reason we’ve come this far. He’s the reason we are here. He’s the man with the plan. He’s our coach, we are his players. He knows best.” She drops into the seat next to Tobin, her eyes on Mark, waiting for him to speak.You could hear a pin drop. Mark clears his throat. “You’re imposing your will a bit too aggressively, let’s tame it. No eye for an eye.” He says quietly. “We need to break loose and the Courage are swarming us. We need to find our way. I need crisp, smart passes. Let’s keep possession and build our plays.” He continues to speak but Tobin doesn’t hear it. She has her head down and is silently weeping, leaning forward, elbows on her knees, hands on head, trying her best not to completely lose her shit right now. She feels Allie’s hand on her back and it grounds her. Even after screaming at her, Tobin knows Allie still loves her. She looks up Mark finishes his speech, telling them to hydrate before heading back out there. Sinc gets them roused up, yelling about how this is our moment for glory and we just have to make it happen. Franch gets in an Ice Bear joke and they leave. She slowly gets up to leave, wiping her eyes, her shoulders slumped when Mark calls her name. She turns back to face him, certain that he’s benching her for the second half. He’s silent until the room is empty. Tobin staring at her feet, thinking of all the possible awful things he could say to her.“I was out of line earlier and I’m sorry.” He says quietly. “I’m sorry I let my frustrations out so publicly like that and upset you. You’ve walked a fine line all season between Allie and me and have been nothing but a complete professional. You’ve always put the team first. I thank you for that. More than you will ever know,” Mark pauses, looking at her. “Now please, don’t let this match be one you’ll regret. Go and play your game. I believe in you.” He eyes her one last time and strides out of the locker room, leaving her alone.Tobin stands there, wiping her eyes and thinking. I’ve got to do this, she thinks, I can’t let my team down now. She grabs a water bottle, shoots some Gatorade in her mouth and trots out of the locker room. The whistle sounds to start the second half. Tobin feels much calmer, looking to get in a groove with the flow of the match. In the forty-seventh minute, Lynn Williams gets a chance, shooting hard with Franch deflecting, the ball popping out to Jess MacDonald who uncharacteristically whiffs on her shot. Tobin is matched up against Dahlkemper, they go hard each time the ball gets near. It’s the forthy-eight minute after a long clearance ends with flick on from Amandine who gets it to Lindsey Horan who volleys a header in to score. The Thorns celebrate quickly and reset. This is it. They must keep the lead and shut down the Courage offense. A dangerous free kick in the fifty third minute, but Dahlkemper’s shot goes harmlessly over the crossbar. Dagny comes in for Sykes, Mark wanting some fresh legs in. MacDonald has another throw in, it falls to Hatch who’s cross goes out. There’s too much stoppage in time for any flow to happen. Neither team seems settled, although the Courage seem to have more possession. Raso gets bumped off the ball without a foul on Hinkle. They play on. They’ve played for over ten minutes and Tobin hasn’t really touched the ball. Another corner kick for North Carolina. Dahlkemper’s ball goes nearly through the box but they still retain it only for it to roll out. The tension is thick. The Thorns have a quiet confidence, they know what they can do. Tobin and Sinc have been kept quiet, trying to break free and make something happen. They’re both frustrated but they do know they’re part of the game plan. Tie up the NC players and let someone else sneak in and score. It’s not super chippy, tempers remain calm on both sides. Horan takes down Mewis in the sixty-six minute for a free kick but it looked hard. Lynn Williams breaks free and fires a shot that Franch saves. Nadia Nadim comes in for Raso, Hayley taking her time to walk off. The Courage begin to press. It’s a cat and mouse game, each team edging forward to get something started only to be denied. Franch goes high against MacDonald, leaping up for a Doniak ball and coming down with it. Tobin wants a foul on the goalie for her shot at the top of the box, but they play on. She curses herself for complaining instead of going for the ball. Dagny fouls O’Sullivan, clipping her from behind and the Courage get another dangerous free kick from outside the box. The Thorns line up, ready to defend. Three Courage players line up in front of their wall, Dahlkemper playing it short to Mewis who takes it, turns and spins for a shot. The shot gets deflected and rebounds wide to the far side of the field, Doniak sending a cross into the box. It gets headed out, Tobin chasing it as fast as she can, hoping to corral it and send it up field for a fast break. Lynn Williams gives chase, coming up behind her, coming in and smacking the outside of her left ankle, sending a sharp pain up her leg from the awkward angle. The tears come. It hurts, she thinks it’s serious from how bad it hurts. She’s balled up on the turf, Dagny with a hand on her, looking concerned. She covers her eyes with her hand, the tears streaming. Fuck, she thinks, she could feel something snap. Part of the tears are just from frustration. The game. Allie and her situation. Her own fucking season with her back injury. She’s surprised she can put weight on it when they haul her up. The trainers asking her to take it slow. She’s pissed. The last thing she wants is extra time added to this battle. They get her to the sideline, she’s reaching down, her ankle joint feels unstable and painful. Maybe a high ankle strain. She’s trying to jog it off, willing herself to not feel the pain. The trainers spray it down, freezing the joint. She’s watching as Dagny makes a nice break forward only to have Zerboni deny a cross. She’s back on the pitch, gritting her teeth as she runs. It’s feeling better, but something is there. Maybe it’s just a bruise, she wonders. It’s the seventy-eighth minute and neither team is budging. Again, it’s seems like the Courage have possession but Kling intercepts, allowing them to waste some time and stall before sending the ball forward. They move into the time waster mode, playing smart and cautious, slowing the game down, letting the seconds tick off. Williams gets a chance and gets into the box, sending the back and Mewis gets off a weak shot that Franch handles easily. In the eighty-first minute, Tobin gets a chance for a free kick from the side. She takes her time settling the ball, looking over the field. She sends in a fast inswinger, gliding over but finding a Courage player who clears it with her head. It bounces around and the Courage take possession, Hatch getting fouled by Dagny. A huge save by Menges, blocking MacDonlad’s shot, and possibly saving the game. Tobin hits it off Doniak to get a corner, sending in the ball near post. It gets cleared out of bounds, seconds clicking off the clock. Tobin’s feet feel slow, clumsy, her touch is off. She hears the announcer calling for four minutes of stoppage time. Her right ankle hurts from the bone spur, her left aching from the hit she took. The Thorns supporter’s chanting is getting louder and louder. The drums beating, keeping her legs moving. Amandine Henry is on the ground with a cramp. The Courage fans are hurling insults at her for wasting time. Allie comes on in the ninety-third minute as Henry goes off. Allie sends Tobin a smile as she runs into place. The Courage swarm the Thorns, pressing the ball, keeping possession and sending it into the box. It gets cleared but the Courage send it in again. The whistle blows. The Thorns have won. Tobin crashes into Allie, feeling her hold her tightly and then shoving a Champions t-shirt at her. They break free without speaking, wandering around, hugging her teammates. She prays she won’t get called for an interview, she doesn’t want to speak to anyone in the media. They line up to shake hands with their opponents, Tobin stopping the line when she faces Taylor, who is now in a sling. “Taylor, I” she starts. “I know,” She replies, “I get it. I’m good, we’re good.” She shakes her hand and moves on. When she sees Hamilton, she doesn’t know what to say. “This isn’t on you,” Hamilton says to her. “I’ll say it to anyone who asks. This one wasn’t on you.” Tobin nods. She knows she’s going to be crucified in the press and by the fans. This wasn’t one of her most shining moments. She really just wants to crawl into bed for a couple of days and forget everything. She’s embarrassed by her first half. She hopes her second made up for it a little. Her right ankle is killing her, it feels like a railroad spike is being hammered into her joint with her every step, the thick tape job seeming to keep it attached to her leg. Still, the adrenaline is streaming through her body and she starts to get in to the celebration. Sinc grabs her and tells her that her and Allie will lift the trophy with her. The three originals. She nods. Cameras are everywhere, so she plasters on a smile, laughing and trying to be happy. She’s happy for the team, just not herself. In the middle of the madness on the field, Allie finds her. “I love you Harry,” she says, hugging her tight. “I love you, too, Har,” Tobin’s reply is muffled by her head being buried in Allie’s neck. Allie pulls her head back, holding it with both hands. “None of this will ever change you being my Harry, got it?” she states seriously. “It’s just business, okay?” Tobin nods, trying to stomp down her rising emotions. Allie hugs her again. “I cherish playing with you for so long,” Allie whispers, “I’ve been so lucky.” She does get called for an interview and walks slowly over to speak. Collecting her thoughts. Calming herself. She explains how proud of the team she is, of their fight and how the game was fight. He asks about what was said in the locker room, she explains how they were just matching the Courage. They’re a great team, they defend as a unit and the intensity. Thankfully it’s quick and she trots off to join the team standing in front to the faithful Riveters, celebrating this victory with them. A.D. is in the crowd, scaling the bleachers, hopping through the aisles, high fiving everyone. The Courage line up to get their medals, most taking them off as soon as they walk down from the stage. Portland lines up, receiving their medals and assembling on the stage. Tobin can barely get up the steps to the stage, her legs are dead. They get Mark’s daughter Edie up there with them as the coaches an awarded. They present the MVP trophy to Lindsey Horan, Lindsey speak briefly about last year’s defeat and how they prepared this year and how it was a team award. Sinc gathers Tobin and Allie to lift the trophy with her as she is handed it. The confetti blows as they lift it, bouncing on their toes as it gets passed around so everyone can touch. Tobin’s happy, she’s so proud of this group and so lucky to be standing here, playing in the final and celebrating with them. The stage is bouncing, they’re yelling out the song that’s playing as they pass the trophy around. As the players make their way off the stage, Tobin’s standing in front, looking down, taking it all in. She sees Allie get the trophy shoved into her hands and they stand face to face. Allie brings out her lower lip in a sad pout. “Harry,” Allie says, looking at her sadly, “we did it.” Tobin hugs her, “I’ll miss you so much,” she says into her ear, “you deserved so much more than this, I’m so proud of you.” “I love you Harry,” Allie says, trying not to let the emotion of it all make her break down right there. Sinc comes up, draping an arm on each of them, Smiling at the two, “Let’s celebrate.” she says in her soft voice, knowing what this moment between them all means. Allie hands
Tobin the trophy and they walk towards the stairs. Tobin hands the trophy to Sinc to take for an interview and she mixes with the team. Tobin finds Nadia, giving her a hug, holding her as they smile at each other. “It’s been a privilege.” Tobin says, nodding at her, “You’re amazing.” Nadia wipes a tear from her face, grinning back, “You are too.” They hug again and walk away, looking for others. Tobin finds Amandine, “Tu vas me manquer, mon ami.” She smiles back at her, “Moi aussi.” She hugs her, “Your pronouns and accent are still terrible,” Tobin laughs and they walk back towards the gathered Thorns fans, assembling one last time. They take their team photos with the fans in the background. They get to stand individually with the trophy and fans behind them, the photographers clicking away. Tobin and Allie gather together facing the fans, raising the award, making half a heart symbol with each of their hands, meeting in the middle. Tobin glances at her, sending her a soft smile. Allie nods and says “Be happy, Harry,” and they grin and turn around to get their official photo taken together. Mark riles up the crowd, leading a cheer while Edie cheers with him. They slowly drift back towards the bench, then sign some autographs for the fans that have remained, greeting family that came to the game as well. They meet the loyal Thorns fans who have traveled to watch them play. Their cheers of victory overcome the other chants of ‘Fuck You Portland’ and ‘Fuck You Tobin’ that are being yelled in the arena. Tobin gets it, there has to be a villain and this time it’s her. She earned that title. She hears Mark defending her play with talk of other card worthy tackles that were ignored. She hears people commenting on the ref not taking control of the game. She tries to live in the moment and enjoy this victory with her team. She gets blasted by champagne on the locker room. Her eyes burn, as she wipes them. Everyone is relieved, excited, this is something they have all worked for. She glances at Allie who gives her a sad grin, then her blasts her champagne. They laugh and clear out so they can get showered and dressed. The team is invited to bring their families to a nearby banquet hall to celebrate. Tobin honestly doesn’t want to go, but knows it will look bad if she doesn’t. She texts the address to her parents who’ve both come as well as Perry and her husband Taylor. Katie and Jeff couldn’t make it with the short notice. Seeing her Mom is the worst, Tobin could just see the questioning in her eyes about how she played the match as her Mom greets her. Her Dad is better, he’s got a good poker face, remaining neutral and not giving off a vibe of disappointment like she feels from her Mother. Taylor swoops her off her feet, spinning her around and cheering loudly. He’s had some cocktails. He’s a good guy, never pries, never questions Tobin’s soccer stuff. He stays out of the details, only wanting Tobin to be happy. Perry. Perry on the other hand, hugs Tobin close, not saying anything, just holding her tightly. She knows something serious had to have happened for Tobin to play so ruthlessly like that. She knows Tobin’s been struggling with knowing her best friend is leaving. She also knows this is not the time nor the place to question it. Tobin’s grateful for that. They sit with Allie and Bati and her parents, Kling and her family as well at the large table. Thank God for Kling, she keeps everyone laughing. Bati goes out of his way to make Tobin laugh, picking on Allie who’s quickly on her way from being tipsy to full on drunk. Tobin sips a glass of pinot noir, having a weakness for red wines, something she picked up on from her time in France. She doesn’t want to get drunk, not knowing if she’ll be cornered by anyone and wanting to have her wits about herself. They get Tobin to talk about the house, asking her why she changed her mind from going with a condo or townhome to an actual house. Tobin’s at a loss to exactly explain it besides just saying it called to her. Her Dad takes over, talking about what an amazing deal is was and shares the features of the house and other details. She sends him a smile, happy he’s excited for her and questioning what it is about the house that makes her feel so strongly about it. She’s grateful that her parents can remain A microphone gets shoved into Mark’s hand as they finish eating and he stands on a chair to speak. He talks about how proud his is of them, how they executed the season long game plan to get where they are today, the Champions of the league. He mentions a few funny stories from the season that Tobin hasn’t heard from not being there, laughing at her teammates antics. He finishes with challenging them to be the first team next year to win the Shield and the Championship. Music starts but Tobin’s done. The table can see her drooping eyelids and how her shoulders are slumped. Bati tells Tobin that Allie is staying with him tonight and he’ll drop her off in the morning. He says goodnight for Allie who’s on the dance floor, staggering slightly. He corrals her and they leave. Tobin’s family agrees that it’s time to go and Tobin insists on ordering her own Uber back to the hotel. She just wants to be alone. Besides, she’ll take longer saying goodnight to everyone. She takes the near full bottle of wine from the table, placing the cork back on and holding it under her light sweater as she departs.Once in her room, she disrobes, getting into comfy clothes, finally alone with her thoughts. She opens the wine and pours herself a glass. She gets her journal and writes in it for over an hour until she hears a soft knock at her door. It’s Sinc. “I saw the light on,” she says as Tobin lets her in. She glances at the wine bottle and the journal, instantly knowing Tobin’s struggling. “Want a glass?” Tobin offers, holding up an empty cup. Sinc nods. Tobin pours one and hands it to her. Sinc sits down on the lone chair next to Tobin’s bed while Tobin sits on hers. “It will be hard for the next few days.” Sinc begins, “The media, the fans, the idiots commenting.” Tobin nods. She hasn’t even looked at her phone yet besides to text her family. “You don’t comment much anyway, so it won’t be unusual if you just ignore it.” Sinc observes, taking a sip. “This is good.” “Yeah,” Tobin sighs, “something like, just snapped, you know?” Tobin looks at her. “All season I’ve been just supporting Allie as best I can, not knowing what’s really going on, just hearing her side. Then today, today of all days, I hear Mark say that.” She shakes her head. “What did he say?” Sinc asks quietly. “She’ll be lucky to see the field today. Long is done here.” Tobin says just as quietly, “He was talking to Rich.” She adds. Sinc nods, letting out a sigh. “As hard as it is to have it happen, it’s just as hard to see it unfold and know there’s nothing you can do to fix it.” She looks at Tobin and shrugs. “It was oil and water right as the season began. Allie worked hard and did what was asked of her, Mark would change her position and challenge her to learn more. Allie would do it and Mark wouldn’t be satisfied.” They’re both silent, thinking about how internally the season unraveled. “What really got Mark was Allie posting stuff on social media.” Sinc says. Tobin doesn’t look much at it, she’s not as much of a fan of it as she once was. One too many weird stalkers making creepy comments. “She posted photos of celebrating her birthday on gameday when she was away from the team.” Sinc explains. “Then, after she didn’t get to start a couple of times, she posted something about not being a bench player.” Tobin cringes, laying her head back against the pillows on the head board. “Oh, man,” she says. She shakes her head. “That would get any coach.” She says glumly. “And a lot of teammates.” Sinc nods, “I had to do some explaining about the party pics.” She says, “A lot of the team didn’t know why she was gone, and to see that…” she shrugs. “They give her the cold shoulder?” Tobin asks. Sinc nods again. “I don’t totally blame them, it wasn’t a hot idea to post that really.” She says diplomatically. “It was stupid, you mean.” Tobin corrects. Sinc makes a face and shrugs. “She’s your best friend, I’m not going to bash her. I love her too.” They sit again in silence, slowly drinking their wine. “You know you were a big reason we won today.” Sinc states, looking down at her glass. “Nah,” Tobin dismisses, “I didn’t do anything except injure people.” She says disgustedly. “They double and triple teamed you. They forced the ball away from you.” Sinc states, “You took them out of their game plan by causing havoc on the wing and in the middle.” “I don’t know about that,” Tobin shakes her head. “We’ll watch a replay and you’ll see it,” Sinc nods confidently, “you did more than you think.” There’s a pause as Tobin thinks about what she just said. “You know that Hamilton play was all on her.” Sinc says abruptly. “But Taylor wasn’t.” Tobin says glumly. “I’m sure she hates me right now.” “She knows you, she knows it wasn’t intentional, Tobin.” Sinc comforts. “It’s a part of the game. An ugly part, but still part of the game.” “McCall took some hard shots. She was pretty clean all night. All ball.” Tobin says. “She’s mellowed on the late hits. But then Lindsey took her out. I’m shocked she didn’t get a red for that one.” Sinc saying, leaning forward. “I’m shocked I didn’t get one for Taylor. Or Hamilton.” Tobin admits. It feels good to talk about this. Especially with Christine. She understands. She’s been through this, playing a horrible match and regretting it. “She didn’t have control of the game.” Sinc offers, “She should have warned you after Taylor and Doniak totally should’ve gotten a yellow.” “I’m just glad we made it out alive.” Tobin says, giving Sinc a tired smile. “How’s the ankle?” “They’re both killing me,” Tobin admits, “if I didn’t want to drink this wine, I would be chewing pain killers right now.” Sinc nods. “You’ve been dealing with this for over a year.” She observes. Tobin sighs, “Keep it yourself, but I’m having surgery in January.” SInc’s eyes go wide as she nods. “It’s a bone growth.” Tobin explains. “I fucked it up today. I don’t think I fractured it, but it hurts pretty bad right now when I walk. I doubt I’ll play any friendlies for the rest of the year.” “Shit, man,” Sinc says, leaning back and crossing her leg, “that sucks but at least you’ll be ready for qualifiers, right?” “That’s the game plan.” Tobin nods. “This was scheduled before I came back from LA.” She explains, “I didn’t tell anyone except Mark and my Mom. Not even Allie.” Sinc nods. They won’t hear it from her. Tobin knows it. “So, when are you moving?” Sinc asks, smiling at her. They’re done talking soccer. They talk while they finish the bottle, Sinc explaining some of the issues she’s dealt with as a homeowner that Tobin should look out for. Tobin wondering where she should start with her ideas on the projects she wants to accomplish. Sinc gives her a tight hug when she leaves, again telling her everything will blow over, and to just tough it out. They’ve got a busy day ahead of them, flying back to Portland and having a rally tomorrow night. After she’s gone, Tobin gathers Allie’s possessions that are strewn about the room, organizing them and getting most of her stuff packed. She lays the rest on the bed, her toiletries and some clean clothes, knowing she’ll be flying in here in the morning to get ready for the flight out. She’s sleepy now, physically exhausted, emotionally drained and half buzzed from the wine. She can’t thank Sinc enough for stopping by. It really helped her. She’s a good friend. She sets her alarm and slides into the bed, pulling the comforter over her shoulder as she shuts the lights off. Sleep comes fast. October 15, 2017 Tobin’s startled when the door bangs open loudly, Allie entering the room, balancing two cups of coffee, one in her hand with her arm holding the other cup close to her body, a bag being held firmly by her teeth. “MMmmm mrrpphh mme,” Allie mumbles sleepily as she crosses the room, Tobin lifting her head to look at her. She’s in one of Bati’s t-shirts and the same pants and shoes from last night. “Morning,” Tobin greets, her head hitting her pillow again. She closes her eyes. Allie sets the coffees down, takes the bag from her mouth. “Morning,” she says, looking around the room. She spies the empty wine bottle and glasses. “Have a guest?” she questions, raising an eyebrow. “Sinc.” Is her muffled reply from her head in the pillow. Allie nods. She walks across the room and slides on to Tobin’s bed, lying next to her, wrapping an arm around her midsection. She sighs heavily as she scoots over to get closer, legs touching. “Are you mad at me, Harry?” she questions quietly. “Nah,” Tobin replies, “I needed to get my head out of my ass.” “But, I,” Allie pauses for a second, “I sorta lost it on you in front of everyone.” Tobin sighs, “They saw how I was playing. If you hadn’t said it, someone else sure was going to.” “I’m sorry,” Allie whispers, “for so much.” Tobin rolls over on her back, turning her head to face her. “Please don’t be.” She says, “I understand.” “We’re good?” Allie asks. “We’re good, Har,” Tobin confirms. “We’ll always be good.” She smiles. “I brought breakfast,” Allie says, “Did you pack for me?” “Mostly just got it together.” Tobin replies with a small smile. “Thanks, Harry.” “Well, how many times have you covered for me?” she grins, remembering some wild college trips. “Get up,” Allie says, sitting up and sliding off the bed, “I brought you your favorites.” Tobin gets up, not leaving the bed, but putting a pillow behind her back and sliding up as Allie hands her a coffee cup and then opens the bag. She puts her glasses on and they eat and talk about last night, the celebration, the fans. Tobin’s still very tired but she knows she’ll sleep on the plane. Most likely everyone will. She heard they’re planning a reception at the airport, then they have some free time only to gather in the evening for a victory rally at Providence Park. After that, she hopes she can just disappear for awhile and process everything. She knows she’ll have to call her agent and let him know she really doesn’t want to do any appearances for awhile. It’s not like she gets tons of offers but she likes to keep him in the loop of what she’s feeling.Once they’re on the plane, she sets her alarm for an hour before landing so she can take a pain pill and not limp around when they land. When they get back to Providence Park, the trainers want her to get some X-rays to make sure she didn’t fracture anything and they don’t need to put her in a walking boot or on crutches.The reception at the airport is impressive and touching. So many people have gathered to celebrate the victory. There’s no other city in the NWSL, except maybe Orlando and Seattle, that have fans as faithful as Portland. Tobin feels so blessed to be a part of it. She’s a little nervous walking out, half expecting some boos or catcalls about her play but the crowd is cheering every single one of them. It relaxes her a little and she thinks maybe tonight won’t be so bad. She drops her suitcase and backpack in the hallway, shedding her jacket and dropping that as well, pulling her phone out and setting an alarm so she can sleep until she needs to get moving for the rally tonight. A bunch of them are going to dinner beforehand, so she makes sure she has enough time to get ready. She falls into her bed, lying on the covers, not caring that she’s left her shoes on. She’s out instantly, exhausted from it all. When she wakes, her eyes are dry and she feels like crap. She gets out of bed, making herself a cup of coffee and taking it with her into the bathroom while she showers and gets ready for the evening. Sinc keeps her laughing during the celebration, constantly leaning over to say something hysterical while city dignitaries are speaking. They try to stifle their laughs, but Sinc is killing her and Emily Menges with the one liners. The cry with laughter as A.D. explains the Ice Bears story. Kling and her swearing, Hayley and the crowd chanting for her.Allie’s speech is touching and only a few people know her deeper meaning to her words. She keeps it short so she doesn’t get emotional and turns to thank Sarah and bring her up. When Tobin comes up to speak, she isn’t prepared, she doesn’t want to get emotional so she says her thanks and smartly moves to have Alex come up and speak on behalf of the fans. After the speaking is done, they gather for photos and the whole thing breaks up. Tobin’s touched by the loyalty and love from the fans, these are good people who spend money to support her and her team, coming out for every game. She’s so grateful to have that with this team. Even the city, they allow her to live and don’t intrude very often when she’s out and about the town. Merritt and Gavin have arranged for a private party at a bar for them after the rally and the team makes their way there. Tobin choose to drive, she doesn’t think she’ll stay super long, she’s still tired. She knows they all are, they talked about it at dinner. She ends up staying much later than she anticipates, talking with her teammates, catching up on their lives, since she’s been gone so much. She gets offers from so many of those who are staying in Portland to help her move, she’s completely caught off guard. “You’ve helped so many us!” Kat says happily, “Beer and pizza, name the day!” She crashes when she gets home, tired but still on edge from the festivities. She’s sitting on her couch, wondering what she wants to do tomorrow. She has to go to Providence Park, she’s one of the first players to have her end of season meetings with Mark. She’s a little apprehensive about it, she doesn’t want to talk about Allie. She grabs her notebook, scribbling down the subjects she wants to cover with him. She flips back in her notebook, finding the page from last year’s meeting, copying down those notes as well. Since she really didn’t have a season, she’s just mostly repeating what they talked about last year. She knows she has some responsibilities coming up with the DA, those are mostly meetings, not going to any games or practices. She’ll have a lot of free time. When she closes her notebook, she smiles, thinking about the house. She can’t wait to get started.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
October 16, 2017 “So, have you started packing yet?” Jerry asks when Tobin answers his call. “Uh, not really, no.” Tobin replies truthfully. “Well, you might want to start. Your closing date is Thursday, October 26th. I’ll email you the details. Congratulations again Tobin!” he replies. “Woah, that’s fast!” Tobin says, her mind turning. “Yeah, well, everything is in perfect order,” he explains, “that’s why it’s pretty quick.” “Cool.” Tobin says. They chat for a few more minutes and then hang up. I need some boxes, Tobin thinks. The meeting with Mark goes better than expected, he’s on board with everything Tobin has on her list. It’s funny how in sync they are about what Tobin finds fault in her game. He tells her she’s one of the most prepared players when it comes to self-evaluations. The closest Mark comes to even hinting about Allie is mentioning how professional Tobin is and always putting the team first. She leaves the building feeling good, shoving almost twenty cut down boxes that she got from the concession guy into her car. Today she will pack. She makes four trips from her car to carry up the boxes, leaning them against a few walls in her place. She’s excited, finding her tape gun, putting boxes together, marking them carefully. Before she starts packing, she finds her house binder, flipping through the pages, using her marker to name the rooms. She gets to work. Before she’s finished the first box, she gets a text from Becky who’s back in town and wants to meet up. Tobin texts her back explaining what she’s doing today and Becky replies she’ll be over in twenty minutes to help. Tobin grins, Becky is so sweet. “Hey you!” Becky greets, when Tobin opens the door. Becky is holding a whole handful of broken down boxes. “I thought you could use some.” She explains. “Awesome, dude, thanks!” Tobin says, moving back as she comes in.She sets them down and gives Tobin a hard hug, “It’s so good seeing you!” she says. “You too!” Tobin grins. “So, tell me what you want to do.” Becky insists, “I’m an awesome packer.” Tobin shows her the house binder, Becky is blown away from it.“This is seriously, super amazing, Tobin,” she says, flipping through the pages. “You got a great deal.” “I know,” Tobin agrees, “I don’t know how it happened, it just fell into place.” They decide to start in her second bedroom, packing all of the items she doesn’t use very often. As they work, Tobin fills her in about her ankle and her upcoming surgery. Becky shakes her head, understanding that’s part of being an athlete. “It’s too bad you’ll miss the She Believes,” she says, “but you’ll have no problem playing with these kids when you come back.” Tobin agrees. “I just hope Jill doesn’t decide to start tinkering with our formations again,” Becky laments, “that whole time sucked hard.” “Yeah,” Tobin nods, moving a stack of extra blankets into a box, “we really struggled getting a flow with that.” “Carli told me she wants out of Houston, like seriously.” Becky shares. “She wants to go to Sky Blue.” Tobin nods, “Makes sense to me. Close to home, her husband and close to James.” She’s talking about James Galanis, Carli’s personal coach. “She wants to be on the roster for the World Cup, he’ll keep her focused and in top form.” “Think she can do it?” Becky asks her seriously, looking up at her from the box she’s packing.Tobin shrugs, “I’ve never played with a more committed person. She sets her mind to it, she’ll do it. Unless an awful injury happens.” “Says the Queen of Fitness.” Becky laughs. “That goes to HAO and KO,” Tobin laughs. After they completely pack the guest room, they break for a snack and then figure out they should pack Tobin’s books next. “I really appreciate you coming over to help, thank you so much.” Tobin says as she tapes the last box of books.“It was great catching up and we accomplished something.” Becky smiles at her. “Better than just playing Mario,” she grins. “You only say that because you enjoy kicking my ass so much.” Tobin laughs.Becky shrugs, “What can I say?” she giggles. “So seriously, though,” she says, “let’s try to do dinner with Allie and Bati before they leave, okay?” “Absolutely,” Tobin nods. “I’ll text her and see what her plans are, I don’t remember exactly what day they leave.” “Did you want to come back to my place for dinner with me and Zo?” Becky asks as she puts on her jacket. Tobin shakes her head, “I think I’m going to eat something super quick and try to pack up some more.” “Okay, but don’t let it drive you crazy,” Becky says, “let me know when you’re moving, I’m in and Zo will help,” “Will do,” Tobin says as Becky opens the door, “thanks again.” “Later,” Becky waves. Tobin flashes her the peace sign, “Peace out,” Tobin is munching on a peanut butter and jelly sandwich as she sits at her kitchen table. She’s writing a packing list, trying to figure out what order she should pack her belongings so she’s not too inconvenienced from it. She likes making lists. She works better using them because she gets distracted easily and that gets her off her the task at hand. She’s tried using a day planner but that seems too formal for her, a list works for her. She figures she’ll need her winter weather stuff, but she can pack a few of her jackets. She knows she needs shorts and hot weather clothes for training while this is going on. Also, she needs her sloppy clothes for working around the house. She also thinks if she labels the boxes well, she can find what’s she’s looking for easily and it won’t be a big deal if she needs to unpack a couple of things. She doesn’t have any formal events coming up, she knows she can pack many of her dresses. She’ll have to go buy a few of the garment hanging boxes for those. She’ll leave out some nice clothes for Christmas. She finishes her list of all her possessions, feeling like she’s accomplished something, standing up and tossing the paper towel she had her sandwich on. She goes back to the spare room to pack up the items from her nightstand and doublecheck if there’s anything important in there. It was the only item they forgot to pack. Then she moves the nightstand, pushes the bed against the wall, opening more space in the smaller room. She brings in the boxes from the living room with her books, stacking them neatly, adding it to the pile of other boxes that her and Becky packed. It’s nice to put everything in one space, not having it clutter up her living area. She doesn’t like the messiness. Most people don’t believe that, but she likes order, clean lines, and not a lot of shit laying around. She fishes around in the drawer she has of art supplies and finds a new sketchbook, grabs her box of colored pencils and brings her house binder to the couch. She turns on some music and starts to think about her new master bedroom and how she wants to decorate it. She’s not sure how modern she wants to go with the older style of the house. She gets up again and grabs her iPad. She simply googles decorating old house modern and is enthralled by the image results. She loses herself in looking at them, sketching out various ideas she thinks would work for her place. When she looks up, she realizes it’s almost two in the morning. She looks at the drawings she’s made, knowing she’ll want to actually hang out in each room for a little bit before committing to her actual ideas. She’s pretty sure she doesn’t want to paint the main floor, the light tan will be perfect for her. She sets aside the iPad and sketchbook and makes her way to her bedroom, suddenly exhausted. She uses the toilet, brushes her teeth, washes her face and heads to bed. She falls asleep with a smile on her face. October 26th, 2017 “It’s been a pleasure, Tobin,” Jerry says warmly, handing the keys over to her. She curls her fingers around them and smiles at him. “Thanks so much,” she says, “you made this really easy for me.” “Let me know if you need anything else,” he says, beginning to walk away, “and have fun!” “Thanks!” Tobin says, turning to her car. Her lawyer had left just minutes ago. They had done the walk through in the morning and then met at the bank, Tobin signing so many papers it made her nervous. I have a mortgage now, she thinks, geez, that sounds so adult like. She drives back to her apartment, changes into grungy clothes that she doesn’t care if they get dirty and heads to her new home. As she approaches the house, her smile grows wider. She pulls up to the gate, looking at the piece of paper for the number as she enters the passcode and waits for the gate to roll away. She drives up the long drive and parks next to the porch. Taking a deep breath, she turns the key into the lock and enters. She drops her backpack on the kitchen island next to the pile of owner’s manuals and warranties and looks around. This is mine, she thinks to herself, I can’t believe it. She was shocked when they did the walk through and all of the tools and materials were still in place, she had assumed the old owner would clear them out. His agent informed her that they were included in the sale and now were hers. She doesn’t know a whole lot about the tools, but she knows they’re expensive and will come in handy. Her Dad is flying in later this afternoon, just to help get her started and give her some insight on how she should consider the order of finishing the house. When he told her he would like to come, Tobin agreed instantly, comforted in his assistance. Then she remembered the guest room was a mess and quickly moved everything out and found the bedding so he’d have somewhere to sleep. Her lease ends in the middle of December, so she has plenty of time to bring her possessions over and officially move in. Getting settled as quickly as possible before her surgery is her top priority. “This was all left here?” her Dad asks, eyebrows raised. He knows the value of these tools and the materials. “Yeah,” Tobin shrugs, “they said it was included in the sale.” “Huh,” he says, fingering the chop saw on the basement workbench. Tobin walked him through the house, letting him get the feel of it and showing him what was lying around. “It looks like they have all of this trim stripped and ready to stain.” He observes. It belongs to the second floor hallway. “I think I’d like to keep it as original as possible but blend in some modern touches.” Tobin shares, setting her sketchbook down on the workbench. She shows him some of her ideas. “I like this,” he nods, seeing her ideas for the master bedroom, “maybe a lighter tan so it doesn’t close in the walls?” “Let’s go look?” Tobin asks, grabbing the book and heading down the hallway. “What do you think about that wall being darker than the rest?” Tobin points to the largest wall, “I was thinking my bed would go there,” Her Dad smiles, nodding his head in approval, “I think you should consider joining me in the business when you finish playing.” He says, wrapping his arm around Tobin’s shoulders and squeezing, “You’ve got a great eye.” “Thanks, Dad,” she says quietly, not realizing how important it was for her to hear those words of approval from him. “Seriously, I think anything you do with this place will turn out fantastic,” he continues, “you’ve got a great sense of style, blending old and new, your color palette is interesting but not too far out,” he takes a breath, “I’m really proud of you.” Tobin hugs him fully, “Thanks,” she says, feeling emotional, “love you,” she murmurs into his chest. “I love you, too,” he says, kissing the top of her head. “Now, if you have any trouble with the mortgage or anything,” he begins. “Dad, thanks,” Tobin cuts him off, “I think I’ll be good.” She explains how she used only a third of her savings for a very large down payment, not touching her money market funds, 401K or bonds, her mortgage payment is almost covered by her endorsement deals leaving her utilities as pretty much her only expenses. “That’s very impressive,” he smiles, “you’ve done your homework, Peanut.” “Well, Dad,” Tobin smiles at the childhood nickname as she leads him from the room to show him the garage, “you taught me well and I have a very good financial planner and accountant.” “They left this as well?” he questions, staring at the half full garage of bags of plaster mix, scaffolding, ladders, buckets, toolboxes and miscellaneous power tools. “Maybe his medical condition forced him out of the business?” Tobin wonders. “Maybe,” her Dad shrugs, acknowledging it. “I think the floors and the trim color stain should be the same as the first floor, no?” Tobin asks. They’re back at her apartment, eating dinner. “That would be historically correct,” he nods, “there’s no rules to it, but I think it does flow better.” “So do I,” Tobin agrees as she finishes chewing, “I wonder what’s under the wallpaper though,” she says, “you know, what is the original color they did.” “You know,” he says, “the house is pretty old, you might want to check with the local Historical Society and see if it has any prominence to the city. If important people once lived here.” “I never thought of that,” Tobin nods, “huh.” “It could add value,” he reasons, “it could also factor in how you want it to look.” “So, I should hold off on doing anything until I check it out?” she asks him. He shakes his head, “We could work on the trim, sanding and staining it. With the temperature changing, I think it would be best to either do it each actual room or the basement.” Tobin thinks a minute. “Maybe in each room,” she says. He nods. “I’d get it prepped first, stripped and sanded then figure out your walls, do them and them stain.” “Yeah and keep the rooms empty so it’s easier to work in.” Tobin says, head bobbing. “Like I said,” he grins, “you should come and work with me.” “We’ll see how this goes, okay?” she smiles at him. They spend the next two days with her Dad showing her how to carefully remove the trim from the master bedroom, being as careful as possible not to damage the walls. He shows her how to patch the plaster, explaining the plastering process. He shows her how to properly use the sander, how to use wood filler and mix the stain well and apply it. He gets excited when he sees she has a mixer attachment to use on her drill so she can evenly mix the plaster and paint for her walls. He shows her how to use the air compressor, load the nail gun, and how to safely use it. He has her practice on a random piece of lumber they found in the garage, making her repeat the steps until he’s satisfied and she is confident in using it.He helps her set up the garage door opener, shows how to work the furnace if the pilot light goes out, where to turn on and off the water and electricity. Tobin shoots videos of him doing each task so she can refer to it if necessary. They find some sawhorses in the garage and set them up in the first guest bedroom, laying the hallway trim across them. They put a drop cloth and a plastic layer underneath the work area so they don’t damage the floor. Together they strip the old stain that’s yellowing with age and multiple layers of shellac. He shows her how to bring out the grain while sanding and they stain the first piece. He gives her a lesson in stripping the wallpaper from the wall, how to score it, wet it down and use the scraper. They go online and she watches the video about prepping the walls for plaster and ceiling as well. It surprises Tobin how well they work together, everything comes so easy to them. They can communicate without words while they’re doing their project. There hasn’t been any uncomfortable or awkward moments. It’s been a fantastic visit for both of them. She’s making lunch before he leaves town and Tobin overhears him talking to her Mom. He’s a loud talker on the phone. “Cindy, I swear, she’s a natural. She just has a feel for the wood.” It nearly brings Tobin to tears hearing the pride in his voice. They both shed some tears when they say goodbye at the airport. He insists she call him with any questions, no matter how silly she might think they are. November 1, 2017 It’s a shitty, rainy, overcast day and Tobin really doesn’t want to do anything tiring. Her ankle is killing her, her body is still tired from training and the game, she wasn’t called in for the National Team camp and she just wants to either chill or do something that doesn’t require much physical effort. She slept poorly, tossing and turning all night, her mind unable to shut off from random thoughts. She’s been working at the house every day, making progress on the trim in the hallway. She thinks about it and checks the hours for the Historical Society and decides to visit there and see if she can discover anything about her house. She figures to do it in the morning so she can get a good nap in and have a lazy night. She deserves a day off from the house. She takes a pain killer with her breakfast and decides to Uber, not wanting to drive while she’s on it. She doesn’t like how they make her feel a little out of it sometimes. When she gets dropped off, she’s slightly surprised that it’s a modern building, she had an idea in her head it would be old for some reason.She walks around the first floor, looking at the collections of old mining and lumber exhibits, learning about the history of the city. In her years of living here, she’s never been here before. It’s interesting. Intrigued, she heads over to the main desk and asks where she could find information about an older home in the Goose Hollow area. The volunteer directs her to the second floor, which is much quieter and sparse. Shelves of books line the walls, tables set in the middle, some with computer monitors, reminding Tobin of one of the libraries on campus at UNC. One wall has a framed, large, weathered, old map of the city of Portland. She looks around to find the main desk and approaches it. She stands there for a minute, not seeing anyone around to help when a young woman carrying a load of books approaches from the side. “May I help you?” she asks Tobin, balancing the books. Tobin turns to face her. “Yeah,” she says as she watches the books begin to slide off the top of her stack. Her hands dart out and catches them before they fall to the ground. “Thanks!” the woman says and looks at Tobin. Tobin has never seen eyes bluer than hers in her entire life. “Uh, you’re welcome,” she says, blushing a little, nervous suddenly. She sets the books on the counter. “I appreciate it,” the woman says, “they’re pretty old and I’d have been upset if I damaged them.” “Well, I’m glad I was in the right place at the right time,” Tobin says softly, feeling like she shouldn’t speak loudly in here. It just oozes the personality of a library.
They stand there looking at each other for a moment. “So, can I help you with something?” the woman repeats slowly. Looking at Tobin with a bit of hesitation. “Oh, yeah, right!” Tobin exclaims, nodding. “Uh, I was wondering if I could get any information on a house in Goose Hollow?” “Oh,” the woman says, moving around to the other side of the desk, placing the books down gently and taking the ones Tobin laid on the counter and stacking them next to her pile. “we can certainly help with that.” She glances around quickly and then smiles at her. Tobin smiles back, this woman is gorgeous, she thinks, just looking at her. She has brown hair lighter than hers and a little longer, some blond highlights and strong cheekbones. “Uh, do you have the address?” she asks her, again slowly, as if she’s dealing with someone who’s not all there. She sits down at her computer, looking up at Tobin expectantly. “Uh,” Tobin says, realizing she’s suddenly blanked and can’t remember the address of her house. “Um, just a minute,” she says, embarrassed and whipping her phone out to look for the tab with her house listing. Of course she can’t find it quickly, she begins sweating a little, feeling stupid for not having such basic information. The binder, you idiot, she suddenly thinks, flipping it open and shoving it to her across the counter. “Here it is,” she says sheepishly, pushing her glasses up her nose. Geez, Tobin, can you get any more awkward, she wonders. “Sorry, I, uh, I just moved there and I couldn’t remember it,” she explains, blushing. The woman looks at her, thoroughly amused. She nods her head and arches an eyebrow, “No problem,” she says and Tobin swears that she smirks at her a little. She types the address into her computer, the lone sound in the room is the clicking of the keyboard. Tobin pulls her lips in, biting down as she nods her head and surveys the room. They are the only ones in here. She gets even more nervous. “Huh,” the woman remarks, looking at her monitor, “that’s weird.” She murmurs softly. She continues her typing. Tobin leans over the counter, trying to see the monitor. She can’t see anything. She leans back to her side of the counter. I wonder if she’s worked here long, Tobin thinks. What type of degree do you have to have to work here? Or does she volunteer, she shrugs to herself, as she looks around the room. She’s lost in thought and yawning from being so tired from the pain pill when she hears knocking. She jumps a little, looking to see the woman staring at her with her eyebrows raised, her arm extended on the counter, her hand balled into a fist. The woman clears her throat, “I asked if you know any of the previous owners’ names?” she asks, there’s a slight impatience in her voice Tobin can pick up. “Oh, um,” she shakes her head, “no, I don’t.” She smiles apologetically at her. “Okay,” she replies, nodding her head and retracting her arm, “well, I’ve only found one article about the house which is very unusual.” “The article or only finding one?” Tobin asks, grinning. She narrows her eyes slightly at Tobin, “Both.” She says, her voice clipped. She leans back in her chair, eying her. “So, uh, where does that leave us?” Tobin asks, her nerves back in full force. Can you stop being an ass for one single minute, she berates herself.“Well,” she says, clicking her mouse and the printer begins spitting out sheets of paper, “I” she says pointing to herself, “am printing your article, and you” she emphasizes, pointing at her, “are leaving after I hand it to you.” She stands, snatches the papers from the printer, standing up and shoves them at Tobin. “You might get more information from the County Clerk’s office, ask for deed transfers. Once you get the names, you can come back.” Tobin clumsily gathers the papers in her hands, not breaking eye contact with her. “Can I get your number?” she asks. Holy shit, you fucking idiot, what are you doing, she internally screams at herself. She slaps herself in the forehead, head down, feeling like a complete ass. “That came out wrong,” she says, shaking her head and then lifting it as she feels the blazing flush she’s sure is showing on her face and neck, “I’m sorry. I mean, can I email you the information or stop in, or?” The woman suppresses a grin, trying to maintain her professionalism with a single arched eyebrow, looking at her slightly amused. “Here’s my card, you may email me if you wish or come in when you have some time and if you would like to see the results faster.” Tobin nods, taking the card and backing away, just stop embarrassing yourself and get the fuck out of here, she thinks, “Okay, sure,” she says nodding her head as she bumps a chair and drops her binder. She moves swiftly to pick it up, sucking in air through her teeth, wincing at the sharp pain in her ankle, inhaling deeply and holding her foot off the floor for a moment as she breathes air out. “You okay?” the woman inquires, now looking concerned. “Oh, yeah,” Tobin says, grimacing in pain and glancing around to be sure she doesn’t hit anything else, “it’s fine.” She says hurriedly. She takes a deep breath. Just get the fuck out of here, you idiot. “Uh, thanks, and uh, see ya.” She limps out of the room as fast as she can, feeling like a complete fool and praying the woman has no clue who is she. She leaves the building quickly, pacing out in front, shaking her head, mumbling to herself about what a complete dork she is. She slumps her shoulders, pulls out her phone and orders an Uber to take her home. She just wants to nap now and try to forget this whole horrific exchange with that gorgeous woman. She leans against the street pole to wait for her ride. She slowly pulls out the business card the woman handed to her. ‘Alex Morgan’ it reads with her contact information. She’s a historian. Tobin doesn’t see the face in the second story window, smiling down at her. Alex can’t get over the fact that Tobin Heath was standing in front of her. She even more beautiful than her photos or the TV do her justice. She was so nervous, and sweet and kind of spacy, she thinks as she watches Tobin shaking her head and sees her mumbling to herself as she paces. Did she try to pick me up, Alex wonders as she continues to watch Tobin pull out her phone, typing something and then shoving it back in her jacket pocket. She seemed kind of out of it, but then it looked like her ankle really hurt. I saw her take a few hits in the Final, but I didn’t hear if it was serious. She stays at the window until Tobin gets in a car that pulls up and then she’s gone. I hope she comes back, Alex thinks as she walks slowly back to her desk. She smiles to herself. As Tobin lays on the couch an hour later, snuggled under a blanket, her last thoughts before sleep overcomes is going to the County Clerk’s office tomorrow so she can get some names and go see Alex again.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
November 2, 2017 The next day finds Tobin being at the doors of the County Clerk’s office first thing in the morning, before they open, sipping a cup of coffee. She finishes it as she sees a security come through the foyer and unlock the outer doors, greeting her cheerfully. She returns the greeting and asks where she would find the person to speak to about county records and deed transfers. He directs her to the basement level and shows her where the stairs are located. An hour and a half and fifty bucks later, Tobin emerges from the lower level and back out on the street. It took much longer than her and the clerk thought it would. They found out that in the early nineties, her address had been changed from the original one given when the house was built. Something about zones and a new street and something else Tobin couldn’t quite understand. She has an inch thick stack of papers in her backpack, stopping at the Kinko’s to make a set of copies before she heads back to the Historical Society. As she steps into the building, her nerves come back in full force. She stops in the main lobby, contemplating just turning around and leaving and coming back later in the week when maybe Alex would have forgotten their awkward meeting, then she sees her. Alex enters the lobby, slowing her pace when she sees Tobin, then gives her a smile. “You’re back so soon?” she asks. “Uh, yeah,” Tobin nods. “I was at the County Office, so I thought I’d stop by.” She’s thankful she could form her reply without sounding stuttering. “Cool,” Alex nods, “wanna go upstairs and see what we find?” “Sure,” Tobin grins, following her up the stairs, watching how Alex’s hips move as she climbs the steps. Distracted, Tobin stumbles at the top, her foot clipping the top step making her loudly stomp on the floor as she regains her balance. Alex spins, looking at her with wide eyes, “You okay?” “Uh huh,” Tobin says quickly, nodding her head repeatedly. Alex gives her one last look and then turns to continue to the main desk. Tobin casually leans against the counter, gently setting her backpack on it and unzipping it. She brings out one set of the clipped bundle of papers. “Woah,” Alex says as she looks at it. “Yeah, uh, the lady at the Clerk’s Office said the address was changed,” Tobin shrugs, “something about zoning and a new street.” Alex nods thoughtfully, “That would be why I had trouble finding anything.” “Yeah,” Tobin agrees, starting to feel fidgety. Alex looks over the top sheet, “Okay, why don’t you have a seat over there and I’ll get us set up.” She instructs. Tobin grins and sits down at a table with a computer monitor. Wait, us, she thinks, she’s going to be doing this with me? Oh, Jesus take the wheel, I’m not gonna be able to handle this. She eyes Alex as she leaves her counter area and sits next to her, her arm brushing Tobin’s shoulder. She feels goosebumps break out on her skin, thankful she’s wearing a hoodie. She squirms in her seat, bending over to open her backpack and take out her notebook and a pen. “So, here’s an outline of how to check this out.” Alex says, passing her a piece of paper. It offers multiple websites to use in order to find information on the house and also the homeowners. “We’ll start from the front and work our way back.” Alex explains, “The further we go, if we see someone you’re curious about, we have other resources here to look them up.” “Cool,” Tobin says, glancing at the top page. “Uh, what types of other resources do you use?” “We have older newspapers, court transcripts, census information. Many of them aren’t on the internet. We have some on micro film.” Alex nods. “That’s cool,” Tobin murmurs, shifting once again. “So, I’ll take the first one?” she asks, looking at Alex with raised eyebrows. “Yes.” Alex smiles, “Just run their name through each website using their name and city.” Tobin nods and starts typing. Alex glances at her as they work, Tobin scratching in her notebook writing out in block letters, her hand curled, in a position that looks uncomfortable to Alex, to scribble the information. About an hour in, Tobin starts fidgeting, tapping her foot lightly, clucking to herself as she scrolls down the screen. At two hours, she leans back, taking her glasses off and rubbing her eyes. “You do this all day?” she asks Alex, her eyebrows scrunched together. “Pretty much,” she shrugs, going back to it. Three hours later, Tobin’s stomach growls loudly. Embarrassed, she coughs to cover it up.Alex lets out a smothered laugh, looking over at her. “Why don’t we take a break,” she says, looking at her watch. “I need to check my emails.” Tobin quickly sits up in her chair, pushing it back as she does. “Yeah, I can get going,” she says hurriedly, her eyes wide, “I, uh, I didn’t realize all this would be so involved and I don’t want to keep you from your, uh, your real stuff.” She stands up, shoving her notebook and the papers into her backpack. She stops when she feels Alex’s hand on her forearm. “It’s okay,” she says gently, seeing how frazzled she is, “listen, we can do this some more another time if you want.” “Really?” Tobin asks, raising her eyebrows. “Yeah,” Alex gives her a small smile, “I mean, I don’t really mind doing this on my own.” she shrugs, “We can meet and I can give you updates.” She offers shyly. Tobin shakes her head, “Ah, um, yeah, that would be cool,” Tobin agrees, “I don’t think I’m really cut out for this kind of thing.” She admits, then she looks at her seriously, her eyes open wide, “But, I don’t want to keep you from your work,” she says, looking down at her, “can I, like, pay you or something?” She pauses and then shrugs her shoulders and gives her a sheepish smile, “I don’t know how something like this works,” she’s clicking her pen in her hand furiously without realizing it. Alex nods, smiling to herself at how amazingly charming Tobin is without knowing it and rises slowly from her chair, moving to her main desk. Alex goes behind it and Tobin follows to stand at the front counter. She opens a file drawer and pulls out a sheet of paper and passes it to Tobin. “This is a special project contract. It’s pretty standard around here.” Alex explains, “It states the fees involved for research on people, places or things.” She clears her throat. “So, if you want to do it, then I’ll be happy to take it on.” Tobin nods and looks at the sheet of paper, reading it. It doesn’t seem all that expensive per hour to do the research. She can afford it and if it means she gets to keep seeing Alex, she’s all for it. She looks up at her, “So, like, do I give you a credit card, or?” she questions. Alex nods quickly, “Just sign it and state the hours you want to prepay for.”Tobin stops clicking her pen and completes the form, filling out the contact information, guessing nine hours since she doesn’t have a clue. She gets her wallet from her backpack and hands over her credit card. Alex takes it and the form, sitting down to enter it into her computer. After a minute, Alex runs the card and gets up to hand the receipt to Tobin, so she can sign. “Okay, you’re all set,” Alex smiles, and Tobin just can’t help smile back. She nods, stuffing her wallet away and zipping the pack. “This is pretty rad,” she says, “just text me when you want to meet, okay?”“Will do,” Alex agrees, “probably the middle of next week, alright?” “Sounds good,” Tobin smiles, feeling a sudden surge of confidence, “look forward to hearing from you.” “See you,” Alex says, sitting back down at her desk. “Oh, wait!” she calls out. Tobin spins around, looking at her expectantly. “I need the papers from the County.” Alex says quietly. “Oh,” Tobin says, striding back to the counter, bringing her pack up and opening it, “right, duh.” She hands the clipped stack to her. “Thanks,” Alex says shyly, setting them on her desk. “Okay,” Tobin says backing away, “um, I’ll talk to you next week.” she says, bumping into the same chair from before, shaking her head. “Bye.” She says, turning around and walking out. She’s not far from the door when she swears she hears a soft giggle coming from Alex. When she’s halfway down the stairs, she slaps her forehead once again, frustrated with how that blue eyed woman makes her so tongue tied and clumsy. If Kelley were ever to see her interact with Alex, she’d give Tobin that look of pity of hers while shaking her head and telling her she has absolutely no game. Sighing, she opens the door and leaves the building, pausing, once again, to shake off the whatever spell Alex Morgan has placed on her. She takes a deep breath, straightens her shoulders and walks to her car. She plans on going home, eating a quick lunch and then heading over to the house to put some work in. Once again, she doesn’t see Alex looking down at her from the second story window. Alex had been hoping Tobin would come back. She didn’t expect to see her so soon nor did she expect her to have the information from the County with her. She smiles, glad she remembered the contract and which will guarantee seeing her for while until she finishes her history report on her house. Immensely please with herself, she realizes, Tobin hasn’t stated why she wants this information, but Alex figures it may possibly have something to do with her remodeling or restoring it. Hmmm, she thinks, maybe I should start with an overview of her house first and then on the architect and building style. Then move to the occupants. She nods her head as she turns away from the window, she’s got a game plan. It’s getting dark and there’s no overhead light in the room she’s in. The sun is starting to set and she’s been staining the trim her and her Dad started in the master bedroom for hours. Her arms are getting tired, but she wants to finish this and make up for taking yesterday and this morning off from working here. She thinks she remembers seeing some lights in the basement, the big ones on tripods to light the room. She sets the rag down, wiping her hands on a towel and leaves, heading down the stairs. She flicks the switch and a soft light goes on. There’s a different feel in the air as her feet hit the floor of the basement, walking slowly as if there’s something here that doesn’t belong. She walks towards the back where the workbench is and the other tools were left. A sense of sadness envelops her, goosebumps pop up all over her body, the hairs rising on the back of her neck. She sees the yellow tripod and grabs it, holding it in her hand as she looks around. The room is empty except for the bench and tools in the corner, there’s nothing personal in here. She makes a note to check the bench drawers just to see if there’s a piece of paper with room colors on it from her dream. She sighs, feeling alone, missing her Dad being here and helping her. She sighs again, the melancholy atmosphere wanting to make her cry. Something makes her stay planted in the middle of the room, beginning to really feel like crying, when her phones chirps. Startled, she almost drops the light, shoving her hand in her pocket, walking out of the basement and up the stairs as she answers the call. “Yo,” she says, as she climbs the steps. “Harry!” Allie greets, “What are you doing?” “I’m at the house, finishing up staining some trim. What’s up?” she replies. “Will you be done in time for dinner at my place?” asks. Tobin enters her room, setting the light down and looking around for an outlet. “Yeah, I should,” she says, bending over to plug in the light. She squints as her face is hit full blast of the powerful beam. “I’ve only got two pieces left, but I wanted to finish them tonight.” “Did you figure out your room color yet?” “Eh, not yet.” Tobin answers, “I, uh, I think I’m gonna wait on it for a little bit.” “Why?” Allie asks, thinking Tobin was pretty set with her decision. “Uh,” Tobin says, walking over to the trim stretched across the saw horses, “listen, can we talk about this when I see you? I want to get this done so I won’t be late.” “Yeah, no prob.” Allie says, “I’ll see you in a little bit, Har.” “Oh, wait, should I bring something? Wine?” Tobin asks, not liking to come for dinner empty handed. “Only if it’s the good stuff,” Allie laughs and Tobin knows she’s smirking right now. “Only the best for you, Har.” Tobin laughs, “Later,” “Yep.” She pockets her phone and gets back to work. She thinks about the weird feeling in the basement, the sadness she felt. It was strange. I think I would have started crying if I was down there any longer, she thinks to herself. It’s just the offseason blues, she reasons, happens every year at this time.She finishes up soon, not rushing, but making sure it’s done how her Dad showed her, the trim pieces set apart so they dry evenly with no extra stain residue on the pieces.She puts the stained rag in the empty metal paint can, sealing the lid so the fumes don’t over take the whole room overnight or create a fire hazard. She washes her hands, glad she remembered to bring over soap and towels and toilet paper, making sure she’s removed all of the stain marks and then shuts off the light. She stops short when she doesn’t see her backpack on the island in the kitchen. Huh, where is it, she wonders, looking around. She spies it by the front door. I must have dropped it there, she reasons, walking to the door, hoisting on to her shoulder, hitting the lights, setting the door lock, punching in her alarm code and exiting. As she walks to her car, she figures she usually drops her bag by her door at her apartment so she just did it as a habit. As she starts her car, she pulls around to exit, waiting for the gate to slide open, she wonders what Allie or Bati is feeding her tonight. “Won’t that put you behind your schedule?” Allie asks after Tobin tells them she’s she trying to find out what the history of her house is and that’s why she’s waiting on painting her room and others. “Not really,” she says as she takes another forkful of the chicken marsala Bati made. It’s very good. “I can do other stuff until painting is the last thing to do.” Allie and Bati nod, “Well, when can we come see it?” Bati asks, taking a sip of the wine Tobin brought. “Whenever you want,” she shrugs, “I’ll be around, so just let me know.” “Tomorrow.” Allie says. Tobin nods. “Sounds good.” “So, what are you guys doing with all of your stuff?” Tobin asks, jerking her head towards the stack of boxes. Allie and Bati have decided to leave Portland for the entire off season and spend in New York and wherever else their travels take them visiting friends and family. “We’ll rent a storage unit until I know where I’ll be,” Allie explains. Tobin nods, “Well, I was thinking,” she says, glancing at them both, “if you want, you can store your stuff at my place. Don’t pay for a storage unit. I’ve got plenty of room.” “Nah,” Bati shakes his head, “we wouldn’t want to impose.” Allie slaps his arm, “Sure Har! Thanks!” Tobin rolls her eyes at her best friend.“You can even use the furniture until you get your own.” Allie offers, knowing Tobin has virtually nothing to fill her house coming from a one bedroom apartment. “That would be cool,” she nods. “why don’t you bring a load boxes over tomorrow when you come?” Allie brightens at the suggestion as she hates looking and tripping over them. “Good idea.” She smiles. They finish dinner, do the dishes together and end the night with a boisterous game of Mario Kart that leaves a frustrated Allie smacking Tobin repeatedly and Bati laughing until actual tears come from his eyes. Feeling good when she leaves for the night, Tobin smiles thinking about showing her new place to the two of them. November 3, 2017 Tobin brings in the final load of bags from the grocery store, setting them down on the island. She’s smiling as she begins to empty the first bag. Allie and Bati will be here in less than an hour so she quickly begins putting the cold items into the fridge. She wants to be able to offer drinks, for them and herself as well. She keeps forgetting to bring anything more than her water bottle over while she’s been here working so she decided to bring a few snacks, fruit, some lunch meat and bread, so she wouldn’t have to stop and go out for lunch or dinner. When she finishes that task, she bounds down the stairs to the basement, moving to the workbench to snatch the key ring off it. There’s a side door across from her that’s on the driveway side of the house and she thinks if she can open it, it will make unloading the boxes easier than bringing them through the house. She unlocks the interior door, opening to find a maze of cobwebs. She shuts it quickly, backing away. She stands there, chewing on the one side of the inside of her mouth thinking, when remembers the ShopVac out in the garage. Once she’s cleaned out the doorway and swept the steps, she uses her phone as a flashlight to move the heavy slide bolt to open the slanted cellar doors. She has to use both hands to get it to move, it obviously hadn’t been used for years. She pops her head out as she lifts the heavy door as she takes a step up the stairs. She grins to herself, this will be perfect. She leaves the doors open, glad for the fresh air in the stale basement. She checks her watch and heads back upstairs, just in time to see Bati pulling up. Tobin presses the button to open the gate and meets them on the front porch. They hug and Allie gushes about the porch telling Tobin she has to have rocking chairs on it. They marvel at the high ceiling in the living room and kitchen, Tobin explaining how they probably altered the house and opened it up for space. Bati runs his hand on the smooth wood shelves in the library, telling Tobin how he’d love a work space like this. They go through the rest of the house, now understanding the plans Tobin had told them about. “It’s awesome that the plumbing is done,” Bati says, clinking his beer bottle with Tobin, “this is fantastic.” They’re back in the kitchen, Allie’s opening the cabinets, looking in the pantry. “Yeah, I’m super grateful that it’s all working out so well.” Tobin grins. She turns, “What are ya doing Har?” she calls. Allie pops her head out of the pantry room, “Check this out,” she jerks her head. Tobin and Bati enter the pantry, standing to the side. On one side of the pantry is a marble counter with cabinets below and above. The other side is lined with shelves. Allie’s got papers spread out along the counter, inspecting them. She turns and looks at Tobin. “Have you seen this?” she asks, seriously. Tobin glances, noting the warranties and papers on the appliances. She shrugs, “Yeah that stuff was on the island counter, I put it in here,” she replies. Allie grabs a small stack of papers. “Did you see this?” she asks, shoving it towards her. It’s a newspaper article, the heading reading ‘One Dead Found In Empty House’. “This is your house, Har.” Allie says quietly. Tobin nods, reading the article, learning that a few years ago the house was empty and for sale. A neighbor called the Police claiming to see lights on in the house, fearing a break in. When the Police arrived, they found a young man dead in the basement. The cause of death was unknown at the printing of the article.“This must be the article Alex found,” Tobin murmurs as she reads it again. “Who’s Alex?” Allie questions. Tobin looks up, “Uh, she’s from the Historical Society,” she explains, “she’s looking into the history of the house.” She feels her face getting hot, knowing a blush is forming. Allie smirks at her, “You have the hots for her, don’t you?” she questions, eyes narrowing. “I don’t even know her,” Tobin defends, “she’s just doing a research job,” she dismisses with a wave of her hand as she sets the article down. Allie raises her eyebrows at her, giving her a knowing nod, “Okay, sure,” she smirks again. She gestures to the article, “What do you think about this?” Tobin shrugs, “I don’t know,” she says, running her fingers through her hair, “I mean, a lot of houses have history, so I guess this one does too.” Allie opens her mouth to say something but Bati jumps in, “Tobs, have you figured out where you want our stuff to go?” She turns to him, “Yeah, the basement,” she says, “you want to unload now?” “Yeah, let’s get it out of the way,” he says, letting Tobin pass him and giving Allie a look. “Shush,” he whispers to her, sending her a warning look. She nods and follows them out of the house. They make quick work of bringing the boxes into the basement, neatly stacking them along the far wall.“They left all this stuff here?” Allie questions, gazing at the tools and materials in the workbench area. “Yeah,” Tobin nods, “I guess the previous owner had some medical issues and then financial and that’s why he sold the place.” She explains. They both nod. Allie runs her fingers over her arms, getting a sudden chill. “Weird,” she says softly. Tobin closes the cellar doors and slides the bolt across it, then shuts and locks the interior door. They walk up the steps to the main floor. “So, what’s your plans for the day?” Bati asks Tobin. “Well, the master bedroom trim is finished, so I was going to start on the study.” She replies. Bati nods, “We don’t have to be any where until dinner time, so how about I help you out?” he proposes. “My agent is town and we’re going to dinner, so you’ve got us for about four hours.” Allie explains. “That’d be great,” Tobin grins, “if you really want to.” She says. “I do,” Bati grins back at her, “I miss messing around like this.” He says. Tobin knows he had a summer job during college doing some construction and he knows his way around tools. “I’m going to clean your kitchen,” Allie announces, “do you have any cleaning stuff here?” Tobin shakes her head, “I didn’t bring any over.” Allie nods, “I’ll run back to your place and get what I need.” She says, grabbing her purse off the island, “I’ll bring back lunch, too.” “They left this stuff here, too?” Bati questions, shaking his head as they stand in the garage. “Yeah, it’s wild, huh?” Tobin acknowledges, moving to find the scaffolding pieces. They bring them in and set them up in the room. “We should mark these pieces on the backside so you can put them back in the same spot.” Bati suggests. “Yeah,” Tobin agrees, “that’s what my Dad said to do.” They gingerly climb the low scaffold so they’re near eye level to trim. They’re only a few feet up from the ground but it’s safer than working on ladders. They work easily together, carefully using the short pry bars to loosen and remove the wood. The lay all of the pieces on one side of the room, each marked on the back with which wall they belong to. Tobin finds another heavy canvas tarp to lay out on the floor and Bati finds a second set of sawhorses down in the basement, lugging them into the room. They talk as they work, Bati expressing his concerns over Allie and her season, nervous for where she might wind up playing. “I mean, I don’t really care,” he says as Tobin hands him a can with of wood stripper, “I can work from anywhere. I just want her to be happy.” “Yeah,” Tobin sighs, using the paint tool to open her can of stripper, “it just sucks.” “I know this wasn’t an easy season for you either,” Bati states as he stirs the liquid in the can, “I can’t even imagine how frustrated you were.” Tobin shrugs her shoulders, she doesn’t like to talk about it, but it’s easier with him. He knows her. They’ve been friends, really good friends, for a long time. “Yeah,” she says quietly. He hands her the stirring stick and she starts on her can. When she finishes, she opens a few windows a little, just to get some air circulation. “I know they say this doesn’t smell,” she explains, “but it really kinda does.” They begin the task, carefully applying the stripping solution, waiting for some time for it to lift the paint. Bati suggests putting down another drop cloth to catch all of the paint residue and Tobin agrees, checking in with Allie who’s cleaning the kitchen cabinets. She comes up with a thin plastic disposable drop cloth from the basement, they spread it out under the work area. The paint comes off rather easily for both of them and soon they’ve gotten half of it done. Together, Tobin and Bati had constructed some lower sawhorses, using buckets with lumber across them for the trim to rest on after they were stripped. Allie comes in to check on them. “How’s it going?” she questions, leaning against the doorframe. “Good!” Bati smiles at her, he’s enjoying this. He misses doing tasks like this. “We gotta head out, babe,” Allie says, looking down at her watch. “Aw! So soon?” he pouts, lower lip out. “You can come back another day and play with Harry,” Allie says patronizingly as she sidles next to Tobin and wraps an arm around her, “kitchen is all done and so is the pantry.” Tobin swivels and hugs her, “Thank you so much,” she says. “Anytime, Har,” Allie laughs, “it wasn’t too bad. No spiders.” They all leave the room, Bati and Tobin washing their hands and getting their jackets. Tobin stays on the porch and watches them leave, her eyes following them down the street until they turn at the end of the block. She sees her neighbor outside, raking the leaves in her yard and decides now is a good time to introduce herself. She leaves the porch and strides across her driveway and the expanse of grass to the six foot, wrought iron fence that separates their properties. “Hi,” Tobin calls out as she approaches, “how’s it going?” she smiles when the woman makes eye contact with her. She’s a few feet away from the fence and walks over to meet her. “Hi,” she smiles as she extends a hand, “I’m Karen.” “Tobin,” she says, smiling as they shake hands. “This your place, now?” Karen asks, gazing up the house. She probably a few years older than Tobin, with a short haircut, shaved on one side, teal ends on the longer side. She might have a mohawk, Tobin considers. She sees a tattoo jutting out from under her collar, something colorful Tobin can’t make out what it is. “Yeah.” She grins, “It is.” She’s not sure if this is the same woman who told her to forget about the house when she first saw it. She doesn’t think so. Karen nods, “Congrats and I wish you nothing but happiness here,” she says sincerely. “Hope the place treats you right.” “Thanks,” Tobin says, leaning against the fence, “I really like it so far,” “Good,” Karen says simply, “hope you’re here for a long time.” Tobin wonders what she means by that, but her eye catches something colorful in the yard. Karen follows her gaze, “Oh, that’s my wind catcher,” she explains. It’s a metal structure about six feet high with colorful curved blades coming out from the center on crazy angles. “That’s cool,” Tobin nods approvingly. “Thanks,” Karen smiles, “I made it.” “Really? That’s awesome.” Tobin says, liking the idea of someone artistic living next to her. Karen shrugs as she looks back at it and then turns to face Tobin, “I work from home so if you ever need anything, just come over, okay?” “Thanks, I will,” Tobin says, “it’s nice to meet you.” “You too, Tobin,” Karen says, extending her hand again, “be safe over there.” “Thanks,” Tobin says, thinking that’s kind of a strange thing to say, “I will.” Karen puts both hands on her rake, “I’m gonna get these finished up before dark.” “Cool, thanks again.” Tobin repeats, “See you around.” “Later.” Karen says and moves back to her pile of leaves. Tobin walks away, glad she finally introduced herself and won’t feel stupid waving at her every time and looking like an idiot. When she gets back in the house, she gets a drink and brings it with her to the study to get back to her task. She keeps hearing noises from upstairs and the rooms next to her as she works but she dismisses it as just being the normal noises for an old house she’s not used to yet. It’s almost eleven when she finally finishes, leaving the trim where it lies on the sawhorses. She closes the windows, it’s gotten chilly in here, and shuts off the lights as she leaves the room. She’s tired as she enters the kitchen, washing her hands in the big sink, drying them off with a towel, turning to find her backpack. Once again, it’s by the door. Her keys are on the counter, so she grabs them and then heads out. She gets in her car, feeling even more tired now that she’s sitting, starts it up and puts it in gear. Allie and Bati are on their way back from dinner. Her agent explained that he is working with the Thorns and contacting the teams on her list but right now they were in a holding pattern. He shared that the general consensus is that nobody will make any moves until January, when the draft is closer. That’s pretty much Allie thought was going on, being around the league for this long, she knew the ebbs and flows. “Tobin’s house is amazing,” Bati says as he drives them back to their apartment. “Isn’t weird that they left all the tools?” Allie asks, she doesn’t have a good feeling about the place. He shrugs, “It happens,” “And someone died there?” Allie persists. “Al-” Bati starts, only to be interrupted. “It’s like the setup of a horror movie.” Allie says vehemently, “Crazy low price, too good to pass up, belongings left there, finding out someone died,” she’s shaking her head. “You’ve seen too many horror movies,” Bati says mildly, rolling his eyes, knowing Allie’s imagination. “And that basement!” she exclaims, “It gives me the creeps.” She rubs her arms again at the memory of it. “You can’t say that to Tobin,” he says seriously, guiding the car through traffic, “you’ll hurt her feelings.” “I know,” she admits, her voice soft, but there’s something else. “I just don’t want something bad to happen to her.” “Aw, nothing’s gonna happen,” he says, laying a hand on her thigh, “you’re just nervous because you won’t be here.” Allie thinks about his comment for the rest of the drive.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
November 8, 2017 Tobin is limping as she enters the Historical Society building. She worked out, then met with the Thorns podiatrist an hour earlier, explaining about her consistent pain and he gave her another injection of cortisone. She would feel relief in a few hours, but right now it hurts from him jamming the needle in her joint. She didn’t want to take a pain pill and be spacy meeting with Alex, she figures she’ll just tough it out for an hour and take one when she goes back to her apartment to nap. She opts to take the elevator instead of the stairs, sipping her tea as she waits for the doors to open. She shifts her weight so most of it is on her left foot. The door slides open and she walks in, pressing the second floor button. It takes an unusually long time for the doors to close, making Tobin think she’d be up there already if she taken the stairs. She enters the room and hears Alex’s voice, “Thank you again, Mrs. Stark, you’ve been so generous.” Tobin sees Alex shaking hands with an older woman who says something quietly to her and turns towards Tobin as she leaves. Alex’s eyes light up seeing Tobin, but her face falters slightly when she sees that she’s limping. “I was starting to think I was the only person that came up here,” Tobin grins at her, joking, “how are you today?” “I’m well, thanks,” Alex replies, “are you alright?’ she questions, looking down at Tobin’s foot. “Oh, yeah,” Tobin says, dismissively, not wanting to get in to it. Explaining her injury means talking about what she does for a living and she just wants to get to know Alex without all of that coming out just yet. Alex directs her to one of the tables without a computer and then goes her desk to retrieve her file and a cardboard tube. She sits down across from her, keeping herself as professional as possible. “So,” Alex begins, fiddling with the file as she speaks, “you didn’t exactly say why you were interested in the house information,” she looks up sharply to see Tobin’s soft brown eyes looking at her gently, “and I don’t need to know,” she clarifies, “but you did mention that you had just moved there so I thought maybe this was about a restoration?” She sees Tobin hesitate for an instant and she speaks again quickly. “Like I said, I don’t need to know,” she leans forward, “I certainly wouldn’t want to pry, so I started the research on your house with the man who built it.” “Uh, that’s great,” Tobin replies, shrugging slightly, “would I sound like an idiot if I tell you I wanted to know the history so I would know how they did the interior?” She’s blushing again, why do you do this, she thinks to herself. Alex is shaking her head, “Oh, no, not at all,” she smiles at her, “many people come in looking for the period décor of the original structure.” She’s feeling more comfortable, speaking about what she’s familiar with and leading the conversation. Tobin seems easy going enough to let her do her thing. She proceeds to tell Tobin about the architect, James B. Carlisle and his achievements in Portland. He was actually pretty famous in his day and a few of his buildings still stand today. She slides a photo of him across the table for Tobin to look at, watching as her face scans the image, her forehead furrowed as she concentrates. She explains about the house and how it was built, it took two years, from 1892 until 1894, the foundation made of stone with three outer buildings for the kitchen and staff. She opens the cardboard tube and unrolls the original drawings of the home, Tobin leaning forward, whispering out a low ‘Woah,’ as she looks. She’s caught up in telling her about the first occupants, a wealthy family from Chicago who became lumber barons. She sees Tobin fidgeting, crossing and uncrossing her legs, biting her lower lip and seeming to grow a little pale with a light bead of perspiration breaking out across her forehead. She’s just about to ask her if she’s okay when Tobin lays her hand across the table, touching the paper Alex is referring to. “Uh, Alex?” she asks, her voice tight, “I’m real sorry to interrupt you, but would it be alright to continue this later?” “Oh, sure,” she says trying not to sound too disappointed. “I’m so sorry, but I just had a shot in my ankle before I came here and it’s really starting to hurt bad and I didn’t take a pain pill because I didn’t want to be all spacy again here with you,” Tobin is rushing her words, trying to explain.“Oh, no, it’s completely fine,” she smiles at her, genuinely. “I’m sorry about your ankle,” she says, gathering her papers and placing them neatly in the file. Tobin stands quickly, reaching for her backpack, “Can I, like, text you to reschedule?” she asks, moving away from the table, her limp very apparent. Alex stands as well, “No problem,” she smiles again, feeling bad and wondering how long Tobin was suffering across from her while she babbled on, “you should have said something sooner,” she says gently. Tobin looks down, embarrassed, “I, uh, I didn’t want to interrupt, you’re an amazing speaker.” “Thanks,” Alex replies, now it’s her turn to feel a blush on her face, “well, go, and ice it and take some meds,” she urges, “just let me know what works for you.” “Thanks,” Tobin says, taking a step and wincing as she puts weight on her foot, “I’m really sorry,” She hobbles out of the room, taking the stairs, gritting her teeth all the way down, ordering an Uber because she knows she can’t safely drive her car right now. Tobin’s on her couch an hour later, leg elevated with a bag of ice strapped to her ankle, the two pills she took beginning to take the edge off her pain. She decides to text Alex. Alex is getting ready to take her lunch when she hears her phone chirp. She pulls it out and looks to see a message from Tobin. Tobin Heath: I’m super sorry about this morning. I feel like a jerk about leaving so quick. Can I make it up to you? Coffee? Dinner? Alex’s chest flutters a little as she reads the message. Alex Morgan: Please don’t worry. Hope you’re feeling better. I’ll take you up on that dinner offer. When? Alex grins as she hits send, thinking a dinner with Tobin would be interesting. Tobin Heath: You like Spanish food? Alex Morgan: Sure. Tobin Heath: Toro Bravo at 7 tonight? Alex Morgan: Meet you there! Alex smiles, thinking it would be a good night. She looks up Toro Bravo during her lunch, reading the reviews and familiarizing herself with the menu. It looks amazing. She looks at the photos posted, noting the tables seem to be on the larger size, so she decides to bring her folder with and treat this as if she’s meeting her to discuss her project. She decided to meet Tobin there because it wouldn’t be considered a date in her head, plus she’ll bring the work stuff, so this is really just a dinner meeting. She knows she’s kidding herself, but she doesn’t want to blur the lines. Tobin smiles as she reads the final message from Alex. She was nervous, boldly asking her to coffee or dinner, hoping she would agree to a meal. She sets her alarm for five-thirty, giving herself enough time to get ready. Sleep comes easily, she’s drowsy from the pain pills, but knows they’ll wear off a bit before dinner. She closes her eyes and smiles. Phone, wallet, keys, Tobin pats her pockets, making sure she has what she needs before leaving her apartment. She ordered an Uber, remembering her car is at the parking lot of the Historical Society, she’d like a glass of wine tonight and doesn’t want to risk it with the pain killers in her system. It’s a little brisk out when she gets there, ten minutes early, opting to wait outside for Alex. She doesn’t mind the fresh air, especially after being cooped up for the last few days working inside. She shoves her hands in the pockets of her leather jacket, leaning against the side of the building as she sees people entering and leaving. She misses this, hanging out with others, she doesn’t do much of it when she stays in Portland in the off season. The Thorns who live here year round get together once a week in the off season, mostly doing dinner, often times at this very restaurant, sometimes choosing to hang out at their homes. Rock climbing or hiking some trails. A concert or a Timbers match. Sometimes they train together or pool some money together and rent out an indoor space to kick a ball around. When she visits her family, most of the time is busy, going places and meeting up with others but she’s finding she enjoys the slower pace. Talking over dinner, playing cards or a board game. Her phone rings out, making Tobin slightly jump, reaching in her pocket to answer it. It’s Allie. “Yo, Har,” Tobin answers, looking around, keeping an eye out for Alex. “Sinc and Kat are here, want to come over and play some cards?” Allie asks. “Uh, I can’t.” Tobin replies, trying to figure out how she’s going to tell her this. “What’s going on?” “I’m out for dinner,” Tobin says, shifting against the wall. “With who?” Allie demands in her friendly tone. “Uh, Alex from the Historical Society.” Tobin answers, “We’re having dinner and reviewing house stuff.” “Oh, really?” Allie asks, her voice now dripping with sarcasm, “Dinner and house review, huh? Is that what the kids are calling it these days?” “Har,” Tobin argues, “it’s not like that.” “Uh huh,” Allie giggles, “you are so telling me everything that happens tonight when I see you tomorrow Harry.” “Later,” Tobin sighs, knowing she will be forced to speak about it. “Bye Romeo,” Allie laughs and hangs up. She feels a hand on her arm and whips her head around to see Alex, smiling gently at her. “Hi,” she says, shifting the backpack she’s brought with, “didn’t mean to startle you.” “Hey,” Tobin grins as she nearly drops her phone, catching it after a couple of clumsy bounces off her hands, “no worries, I was just, lost in my thoughts.” She pulls herself from the building, opening the door for Alex and guiding her to the hostess station. “Hi Tobin!” the hostess exclaims, smiling widely at her. “Hi Steph! How are you?” Tobin greets. “Just the two of you tonight?” Steph asks, eying Alex momentarily. She shifts her gaze to Tobin who’s smiling again, “Uh huh,” she nods happily. “I’ve got your table ready,” Steph says, leading them through the restaurant to a side room, further into the building. It’s quieter in here, there’s fewer tables. Alex surveys the room as she follows Steph to a good sized booth, laying the menus down and facing them.“Enjoy your meal, ladies.” she says with a grin and walk away. Alex removes her backpack, tossing it into the booth and takes her coat off as well. She slides in and faces Tobin across from her. “Have you ever been here before?” Tobin asks her, handing her a menu.Alex shakes her head, “I haven’t,” she replies, “one of my coworkers has and she says it’s terrific.” She opens her menu, “Thanks for asking me to join you tonight.” It comes out a little awkward but she doesn’t want to make it sound like she thinks this is a date or something. She’s here to meet with her to discuss her home. “Thanks for agreeing to come,” Tobin smiles at her, “especially since it was, like, a last minute invite.”Alex smiles back and nods, her eyes moving to the menu. It’s a tapas place so she looks to see which small plates she would be interested in trying. “I come here a lot,” Tobin says, “everything is really good.” Tobin looks at Alex as she studies the menu, eying her closely. Alex has on a simple navy sweater, a necklace dangling on her chest, her hair down, long and lush. Light makeup that brings out her eyes, making them even more like an ice blue than Tobin’s ever seen them. “Do you like dates?” Tobin asks suddenly. Alex looks up, eying her questioningly. Tobin shake her head, “Like, the dates, you eat?” she clarifies. I’m such an idiot, she thinks. An amused smiles crosses Alex’s face, “I like dates,” she says slowly, smirking at her, raising an eyebrow. She watches Tobin, approving of her black v-neck sweater with the white t-shirt underneath, a small necklace dangling on her chest. Her hair is down, not pulled back how Alex has only seen it. She looks great.Tobin’s mouth is open but there are no words, she’s flirting with me right now, isn’t she, she thinks. Say something, dumbass. “Uh, you have to try the Toro Kiss,” she says, clearing her throat, “it’s a bacon wrapped date and it’s delicious.” Alex realizes that she is very attracted to Tobin. She wants to get to know her. She’s not sure if Tobin’s just incredibly awkward and nervous or trying to flirt with her or a little of both. She’s heard rumors that Tobin is into chicks and had a thing with some player back when she was playing in France. What the Hell, she decides, I should go for it and see what happens. She gathers her courage. “Is that so?” Alex questions, looking down at her menu. She sees something and smirks, “You know, they have a French Kiss on menu,” she says, her voice a few notes lower, “I wonder how that is,” she trails off, looking at Tobin and her smirk slowly moving into a shy smile.Tobin looks at her, her eyebows raised and then lowering just as quick. Holy shit, this is really flirting, she thinks, what do I say, what do I say, internally panicking. I got it, she smirks right back at Alex. “Well,” she says, sighing a little, “you can order one now or wait for one later.” She smiles back at her. Alex looks at her, thoroughly amused. “I think I might just want one later then,” she says quietly, looking at Tobin.“I think I might, too,” Tobin agrees, nodding her head. They just look at each other for a moment. “Well, not that we got go the appetizers out of the way,” Tobin says, clearing her throat as she closes her menu and leans forward, “can I convince you to do the Chef’s menu for tonight?” “Sure,” Alex agrees as she closes her menu, “I’m up for an adventure tonight.” “Good,” Tobin smiles. “I hope you enjoy it.” “I’ve got a good feeling about it.” Alex blushes, looking away for a moment. When she turns back, she sees Tobin blushing furiously, fighting the growing smile that’s crossing her face. They both lean back, grinning at each other. “So,” Tobin says, feeling much more relaxed for some reason now, “will you share how you became a historian?” This is a question that makes Alex uneasy sometimes when she has to answer it, she nods at Tobin, deciding to tell her the simple reason. “History just came alive to me and fascinates me.” “So, it’s like a passion?” Tobin encourages her, nodding as she speaks. “Yeah,” Alex nods, “you could say that.” “When did you know this was something you wanted to pursue as a career?” Tobin follows up. Alex relaxes, Tobin is easy to talk to. Very easy. “I’ve always loved it, but my sophomore year in college, it really hit me.” She explains, not venturing into the true reasons of how that happened. “That’s cool,” Tobin smiles, “it’s always so amazing to be lucky enough to make a living doing what you love, isn’t it?” “It is,” Alex returns her smile, “and what is it that you do for a living?” she asks, full well knowing the answer. Tobin dips her head down slightly, taking a quick breath, “I’m a soccer player,” she says softly, “I play here in Portland on a team called the Thorns.” “Soccer, huh?” Alex asks, a hint of a smirk playing on her face, she knows she’s teasing Tobin right now, but she can’t help it. The waiter appears asking about drinks and placing an order. Tobin asks Alex if she’d like some wine and Alex agrees, letting Tobin do the ordering. When the server disappears, she looks at Tobin again. “That’s that sport where you kick the ball, right?” she asks innocently. “You got it,” Tobin grins easily, thinking who in the world doesn’t know what soccer is. “So, you know the feeling about how it’s never work when you love what you’re doing, right?” Alex smiles at her, looking at her intently. “Yeah, it makes me super grateful.” Tobin agrees quietly. “And very humble, Ms. Player of the Year.” Alex states, looking even more amused as she watches the surprise on Tobin’s face. “Wait, you” Tobin starts, clearly confused. Alex nods, cutting her off, “I knew who you were the minute you stepped on my floor.” Alex explains, “I just didn’t want to make you uncomfortable or fangirl you.” Tobin leans back into the booth, “So, you know about soccer?” she asks, looking at her expectantly. “I’m a Riveter,” Alex answers, smiling at her. Tobin’s eyes shoot open wide, completely surprised by her admission. “I hope you don’t think I’m, like, a stalker, something or I’ll tell everyone where you live,” Alex suddenly blurts, becoming nervous that Tobin thinks she deceived her. “I just wanted to know you as a person and not make you think I was just another fan or something.” She finishes, looking down at the table. The server reappears with the wine bottle, letting Tobin taste it and then pouring a glass both of them.“No, no, no,” Tobin says quickly after they’re alone, “thank you for being honest, I mean, for wanting to know me.” Tobin wants to slap herself in the head again, awkward much, she chastises herself. Alex begins laughing, making Tobin look up nervously at her. “Okay, this is too awkward,” she says, smiling at Tobin, sticking her hand out across the table. “I’m Alex Morgan, I’m a historian, I’m attracted to you and would like to get to know you better.” Tobin grabs her hand and they shake. “Tobin Heath, uh, soccer player, I’m attracted to you too and I’d like to know you as well.” “Better?” Alex grins, raising her glass to her lips and taking a sip of wine. “Yeah,” Tobin says, nodding her head. “So, now that we’ve got that out the way,” Alex says as she straightens her place setting, “how is your ankle feeling?” “Much better, thanks.” Tobin smiles, “how was the rest of your day?” “It was great!” Alex enthuses, telling her about her new project with Mrs. Stark of the Stark family that rose to prominence in Portland during World War Two. Their appetizer is served and both eye each other as they eat it. “It’s very good,” Alex smiles as she finishes it. Tobin nods as she finishes chewing. “But,” Alex says, tapping her chin with her index finger, “it seems like you’ve set the expectation of the French Kiss pretty high,” she smirks across the table. Tobin’s mouth drops open in shock at her forwardness, but she recovers quickly, giving her a grin. “Well, I hope we can exceed those expectations.” Alex wiggles her eyebrows, “So do I.” As the first plates arrive, the conversation changes to college and Alex shares how she’s from California, went to Berkley, worked for a movie studio but quit when they hardly ever tried to be realistic about the time periods she spent hours and days researching, worked at a museum and finally decided to move and landed in Portland in charge of special projects. “How long have you lived here?” Tobin asks, trying not to drop any food on herself as she eats. “Almost three years,” Alex replies, tasting the delicately sliced lamb on flatbread. It’s delicious. The conversation continues easily and the check comes before they want dinner to end. Tobin immediately slides her credit card in the folder, sitting it on end for the served to take. “Hey,” Alex protests, wanting to pay her share. “My treat,” Tobin grins, “for all the work you’re doing for me.” “You’re paying for that already,” Alex argues, setting her wallet on the table. “Think of it as a bonus for a good job,” Tobin laughs, leaning back, “don’t worry about it.” Alex sighs as she nods, “Thank you,” she says, remembering her manners, “it was delicious.” She waits a moment. “Oh, I brought an overview if you’d like to check it out?” Tobin shrugs, “Wanna get a coffee or tea and look at it?” Tobin offers, she doesn’t want the night to end with Alex. “Sounds good,” Alex agrees, “only if I pay.” “Okay,” Tobin laughs, “there’s a shop a block away.” They walk to the coffee shop, shoulders bumping every so often. Alex orders a decaf black, and Tobin gets a tea. They find a table in the back and sit. Alex pulls her report from her backpack. “This is an overview, and then the next step is getting into the people.” Alex explains. Tobin nods. “Your house has had many owners, being built in 1846, it’s had over forty.” Alex begins. “That seems a lot,” Tobin frowns, creasing her forehead. “You’ll see.” Alex nods, “it seems like it had your average span of ownership in the 1800’s. In the early start of the 1900’s, the number of years people stayed lessened.” “Now,” Alex crosses her legs, settling into her chair, “much of that can be attributed to the turnover of population in Portland at the time. The city was growing but there many infrastructure issues, like police, water sources, the political climate.” “It settled for a period, in the 1900’s, the exception being a woman who owned the house from the 1950’s into the 1980’s. After that, ownership changed, on average, every three years. There is a string of owners only having the place only a year or so.” “Why do you think that happened?” Tobin asks, intrigued. She doesn’t think there’s anything wrong with the house. She likes it just fine. Alex shrugs, fearing she knows the answer but would never admit it. “A ton of reasons, job moves, health issues, money issues with the economy, couldn’t take care of it,” she hopes she sounds casual. “Huh,” Tobin says, “I bet that happens with a lot of big old houses, people buying it, thinking they can flip it for a profit.” She says, toying with her mug. “For sure,” Alex agrees, hoping that Tobin doesn’t hear the hesitation in her voice.“So, what’s the next step?” Tobin asks, ready to move on. “Well, I now examine the owners, check them out and see if there’s anything interesting about them.” Alex explains. She grins, “That’s the fun part.” “Yeah?” Tobin grins, “Maybe some bootlegger owned the place and there’s secret passages.” Alex shrugs, “You never know.” “What’s the coolest thing you discovered when you were working on a project?” Tobin asks, leaning over the table, setting an elbow on it. “Hm,” Alex thinks for a minute, “probably back in California when I was allowed access to a gentleman’s private collection of journals. He was a producer for movies way back when. I discovered how he had revolutionized the film industry by using storyboards and blocked out the film shooting instead of shooting a movie from start to finish. It saved the studios tons of money and allowed for faster production.” “Yeah?” Tobin encourages, leaning closer, enthralled in listening to her raspy voice. “Yeah,” Alex nods, “it was so interesting, I gained permission to write a book about it.” “Wow!” Tobin exclaims, leaning back in her seat, “That’s impressive!” Alex waves at her, “It wasn’t like a best seller or anything, the film buffs liked it.” She doesn’t like to draw attention to herself. “But still,” Tobin argues, “that is super cool.” Alex shrugs, “Eh, it wasn’t, like, ground breaking or anything, I guess I just brought it a little more to the mainstream.” She doesn’t mention that she’s in negotiations with multiple studios for the rights of the book. “Please don’t downplay it,” Tobin urges, “that’s a huge accomplishment, I know a few people who have written books and it’s way more involved than just telling a story.” Alex nods, “Thanks,” she says shyly. One of the workers is beginning to flip the chairs on the tables, indicating quietly that they are closing. Tobin glances at him. “I guess we should head out,” she says, her voice tinged with disappointment. “Yeah,” Alex agrees, clipping the papers together and handing them to Tobin, “this is your copy.” “Oh, thanks,” Tobin says as she stands, pulling out her phone. “Guess I should order my Uber,” she murmurs. “I drove, if you’d like a ride,” Alex offers. “Are you sure?” Tobin asks, not wanting to impose. “Not at all,” Alex grins, “come on.” They’re in the car, Alex turning into the parking lot of the Historical Society, when Tobin speaks. “I’d like to see you again, when can we meet?” she asks quietly. Alex grimaces, “Probably not until the end of next week,” she says, glancing over, a little happy to see the look of disappointment on Tobin’s face. “I’m flying out tomorrow for LA, I’ll be there for a couple of days and then when I get back, I have a couple of speaking engagements in the evening.” She explains. “Bummer,” Tobin says, “well, I’ll be around, so just let me know when you can?” she asks, her voice hopeful. “Absolutely.” Alex smiles as she pulls in front of Tobin’s apartment complex. She turns to face Tobin. “I had a really good time tonight, Tobin.” Tobin gives her a dazzling smile, “So did I,” she agrees, “I can’t wait to do it again.” They look at each other for a moment, both smiling as Alex slowly leans over and gently kisses her. Their lips connect, Alex slowly pressing her tongue against Tobin’s lips, Tobin opening up and accepting her, responding with her own. Tobin brings a hand up to softly hold Alex’s head, both seeking to feel each other. They break apart when breathing becomes the priority. They smile at each other. “Much better than any Toro Kiss,” Alex grins. “So much,” Tobin agrees, “I’d like to do that again,” she says leaning forward against her seatbelt, kissing Alex firmly. “Goodnight,” Alex says, after they finish. “Have a good trip, don’t be a stranger,” Tobin says, hoping she sounds casual about it, but really hoping Alex contacts her while she’s gone. “Be careful with the house stuff,” Alex lightly warns with a smile, “please don’t fall off a ladder or anything.” “I won’t,” Tobin says as she slides of out of the vehicle, “thanks again,” “Bye,” Alex gives her a wave as Tobin shuts the door. Tobin’s drive home is quick and she practically floats up to her apartment, feeling like she can take on the world. Alex is amazing, she’s funny, she’s sarcastic but not mean, she’s super smart, and she’s a soccer fan. Tobin sighs happily as she unlocks her door, her phone vibrating once again like it has for the past hour. She knows it’s Allie, wanting to know how everything went. She enters her place and hangs her coat in the hall closet, kicking her boots off and heading to her bedroom. She gets ready for bed, doing her nightly ritual and changing out of her clothes. As she slides into the bed, she looks at her phone. Ten texts from Allie. She looks them over, laughing at Allie’s nosiness. Harry: She’s amazing. Tell you all about it tomorrow. She closes her eyes, replaying the evening with a smile. Alex is concerned as she drives home, she really enjoyed her time with Tobin but is conflicted about letting it become anything more than a working friendship. I shouldn’t have flirted with her, I really shouldn’t have kissed her, she thinks. She’s scared to let Tobin know more about her, afraid of the questions she may ask. Afraid of having to tell her what she sees. She shakes her head as she drives, how do you tell someone that you see things they can’t, she wonders, or hear things or speak to people who aren’t there and not sound crazy. I hate this. I’m like that kid from the Sixth Sense. I see dead people. I know history because they fucking tell me. She decides to keep it professional between them, no dinner dates, no coffee dates, nothing but meeting in her office. What would Tobin think if she knew the second story of the Historical Society was packed with dead people talking to her and each other and sharing their stories, she shakes her head again.I’ll just keep it to myself. She’s home, pulling up the driveway of her modest house, grabbing her pack as she exits the car. She enters her house, dropping her back on the floor, slowly removing her coat. “Alex! How was your evening, dear?” the warm voice of an older woman calls out to her. Alex looks and sees her happily rocking in her wooden rocking chair. She smiles, “It was very nice, Mrs. Cahill.” “Sweetheart, how many times must I tell you to call me Delores?” “I know, I’m sorry,” Alex says, “did you have a nice night?” “It was quiet, but that new mystery book is wonderful.” She replies with a smile, she holds the book up and sets it on the small table next to her. “Nice,” Alex says with a smile, edging towards her room, “I’m pretty tired so I’m gonna head to bed,” she says, “have a goodnight.” “Goodnight, dear,” Mrs. Cahill says, vanishing from the chair as it slowly stops rocking. Mrs. Cahill is a lovely woman who lived in the house before Alex, she was a housewife and doted on Alex, making sure she took care of herself. A very kind and loving woman, who’s happiness in the afterlife was found in caring for others. She passed away in her sleep peacefully, years after her husband. He hangs around the house too, mostly puttering around Alex’s garage. She doesn’t see him often but he’s very pleasant when she does. How do I tell Tobin I live with ghosts, she wonders, sighing as she strips off her outfit. I hate meeting new people because of this. She changes into her pajamas and sits on her bed. How do I tell Tobin I think her house is haunted, she wonders, how do I do that and not let her think I’m crazy.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
November 9, 2017 “She wrote a book?” Allie asks as they stand a few feet apart, carefully removing the wall paper from the master bedroom. “Yeah,” Tobin nods excitedly, “I mean, how cool is that?” “Totally!” Allie’s impressed. “So, you like her, huh?” Tobin nods as she concentrates on sliding her scraper under the paper. “She’s super cool, smart, funny,” she sighs and turns to face Allie, “I really like her.” She says with a grin. “Good!” Allie smiles, “I love seeing you this happy.” She says genuinely. “It feels good.” Tobin admits smiling as she works. They continue working until lunchtime, Tobin making sandwiches for both of them, sitting on the floor as they eat. “So, what do you think about us bringing our stuff over this weekend?” Allie asks, “We were thinking of leaving town on Sunday.” “So you want to do it on Saturday?” Tobin asks. “Yeah, if it works for you,” Allie shrugs. “No, that’s fine,” Tobin nods, “If you want, you can bring towels and stuff over and spend the night here.” She offers. “Thanks, but I think we’ll just get a room somewhere by the airport.” Allie states, she doesn’t want to tell Tobin her house gives her the willies. “Oh, that’s cool,” Tobin nods, knowing Allie isn’t the best morning person and would be better off near the airport. “So, I think you can use the sofa and chair, I’ve packed my kitchen stuff, but you can use the kitchen table and…” Allie continues her ideas as Tobin listens while she works. When she finishes, Tobin nods, “I think we’ll just keep the bed in the living room,” she counter offers, “it’ll be easier than getting it upstairs and then down.” Allie nods, “That’s a good idea,” she agrees. “You hiring movers for your furniture?” Tobin nods, “Yes, I will gladly pay someone else to move my stuff.” She says firmly. She grabs the spray bottle of the mix of detergent and water and sprays down the section in front of her. She then moves over to the next sections, taking out her razor knife, scoring the paper in a zigzag manner before spraying that down. “Ooh! Look at this!” Allie exclaims as the paper falls away from her scraper, “This is a pretty color!” The wall reveals a light grey paint. “Huh,” Tobin says, looking at the weird green she’s scraped to. “It looks green over here,” Allie leans over to look, “Weird,” she shrugs, looking at it and then at Tobin. “Maybe they did a pattern, Har,” she suggests.“Yeah,” she nods, “could be.” “Allie, you’ll be, like, three feet off the ground,” Tobin admonishes her, trying to get her to work on the scaffold.“Nope,” Allie shakes her head, “that’s three feet higher than I want to be.” She states. “You’re such a chickenshit, Harry,” Tobin laughs, turning to begin scoring the paper. “Don’t care,” Allie says, “I’m not gonna break my ass doing this. I’ll work on the bottom part.” She sits cross legged on the floor, scoring the paper. “I think one wall is an accomplishment,” Allie states as she chugs her water, “my arms are on fire. This is a great workout.” “Sure is,” Tobin agrees, wiping the sweat from her forehead and placing her hat back on her head, “that’s enough for today.” The wall has been stripped of the gawdy flocked wallpaper reveling a mostly grey wall with squares of a soft green. “I don’t think this is the original color,” Allie comments, “I thought I read that they mixed the color in the plaster.” Tobin nods, “Yeah, my Dad said we might not find it in all the rooms, especially if it’s been redone by ripping out the original walls.” “So, what do you think?” Allie asks her. “I still think I want the walls a shade of tan, different than the living and kitchen and stuff, and then I think I want this wall,” she jerks her hand to the wall to their right, “to be a darker shade, almost brown.” “Your bed going on that wall?” Allie questions. “Yeah,” Tobin nods, “what do you think?” “I like it,” she grins, “I think it will look awesome.” She stands up, extending her hand to pull Tobin up. “I’m gonna head out, you want to come over for dinner?” Tobin shakes her head, “I think I’ll stick around here, I was thinking of checking out the attic.” Allie recoils, “I hope it’s not filled with spiders,” she makes a face. “Want to look real quick?” Tobin eggs her on. “No thanks,” Allie says, heading out the room, Tobin following her. “Don’t you stay too late, let’s do dinner tomorrow and we’ll plan the move.” Tobin hugs her, “Thanks for today,” she says, “I really appreciate your help.” “It was fun,” Allie smiles at her, “besides, I can call today an arm day now,” she laughs, flexing her bicep. “I’ll see you tomorrow,” Tobin says as she walks her to the door, “have a good night and tell Bati I said hey.” “Okay, Harry,” Allie nods, “be safe and I’ll see you later.” Tobin uses the fourth key in the lock of the attic door. It doesn’t work. She tries the next one, bingo, she twists the handle. She shakes her head thinking about how she never went up here before. The inspector did and proclaimed everything in good order, just some random furniture and other items in there. Tobin clicks on the flashlight, shining it around as she enters. There’s still daylight but the room is dim. The sun is filtering lazily through the dusty windows. The air is stale, it’s warm up here, making Tobin edge over to a window and try to open it. It’s nailed shut.She turns to look to the far wall where a stack of items are piled up. The floorboards creak as she walks making her look down to be sure nothing is rotted. They look fine to her, but still, the noise sends a shiver down her spine. She turns off the flashlight, setting it on the windowsill and surveying the pile. She sees the base and stand of a floor lamp, the shade missing, some chairs, a coat rack and a couple of dressers. She can’t see the rest behind that. The room is large enough, so Tobin decides to unstack it and spread it out so she can really look at the items. Maybe something would be worth refinishing and using for herself. That would be cool. She likes the idea of mixing old and new. She begins with moving the coatrack, bringing it to the far side of the room, coming back and taking the wingback chair and dragging it away from the pile. Two identical high dressers are pushed to the side. A cool long, narrow table is next. Side tables are stacked upside down on each other. A handsome desk chair, slats on the back with arms on the sides. She rolls that off to the side. She lets out an excited squeal when she finds a cool trunk made of wood and leather. It’s heavy so she pushes it to the side. Then she sees six wooden boxes, the tops nailed shut. She moves those away as well, curious as to what they hold.As she moves the boxes, she sees a wooden desk. It’s got clean lines and looks in decent shape. That would be awesome in the study, she thinks as she puts her shoulder into it to move it away from the large cloth covered item behind it. She sees the edge of a wardrobe when she pulls an old cloth from it. It’s a dark heavy wood, she can’t move it by herself. To the left of it looks like the pieces of a wooden bedframe. It’s a dark wood, very dusty and dirty. She wonders what it would look like when cleaned up. The headboard has heavy square spindles across it with the bedposts made of very thick, maybe six inch thick wood. Tobin decides to try and set it up tomorrow, there’s plenty of room in here for her to see what it looks like. If she’s not crazy about it she could always use it in one of the spare rooms. She looks around at the treasures she’s discovered. By far, the desk and the chair are the most awesome. The trunk is a close second. She kneels next to it, seeing if she can open it. She can’t. She pulls the key ring from her pocket, methodically testing each one and not having any success. Slightly disappointed, she moves to the desk, opening the drawers, running her hand over the dusty wood. She can’t wait to tell her Dad about this. She thinks if she just buys a good wood cleaner, it might be perfect. She’ll ask her dad for his opinion. Remembering what he had told her about true wood craftsmanship, Tobin pulls out a drawer to look at the dovetails. The wood on the sides look like fresh wood, bright in color, it’s clean and not dull at all. She slides the drawer back in, pulling out another one when she hears a flutter. She looks and sees a piece of paper on the ground. She sets the drawer down, bending over to pick up the paper.Once she touches it, she knows it’s not just paper, it’s thicker that a regular sheet of paper. She turns it over and sees it’s a photo of a beautiful woman. It’s a black and white photo and looks very old. There’s an embossed name of the photography studio in the lower corner but what really catches Tobin’s eye is the woman in the photo. She’s wearing a thin, long, light colored dress, lace on the bottom half, a low, revealing top with long sleeves. She has long dark, curly hair flowing over her shoulders. Her complexion is darker, she may be black or Hispanic or just very tan. Tobin’s not sure. But she knows, she’s gorgeous. She isn’t smiling, but rather looking curiously, almost challenging at the camera. Her eyes bore into Tobin, they’re neither dark nor light, making her wonder what color they were. She’s posed, standing next to a white marble column, one hand on her hip, the other lazily draped on the column. “Beautiful,” Tobin murmurs, captivated by the beauty. She shivers suddenly, realizing the room has grown cooler and darker. She attributes the shiver with not moving around anymore and looks up towards the windows, seeing that dusk has come. She walks over to the windowsill, grabbing her flashlight and leaving the room. She leaves the room open, knowing she wants to come back up there tomorrow and take pictures in the daylight to send to her Dad. She’s excited about the desk and that wardrobe. She can’t wait to clean them up. She drops the photo in the pantry on the counter, deciding that will be where she places the small treasures she finds. She cleans her dirty hands in the sink in the kitchen, humming to herself. She needs some music here, she decides. She doesn’t have the cable set up yet, she wants to do that closer to the beginning of December. She thinks she may have a boombox down in her storage unit, maybe she’ll grab it tomorrow before she comes over. She grabs her back pack, throws on her jacket and shuts the lights off as she heads out. Satisfied with her progress, she’s whistling as she approaches her car, feeling good. November 10, 2017 Friday brings rain, the sky dark and overcast, Tobin rolls over in her bed, satisfied to stay there for awhile. She sleeps in for another hour, enjoying the feeling of not needing to be anywhere by a certain time. When she finally leaves her bed, she throws on her jeans from yesterday, slowly moving to the bathroom to start her day. She eats a big breakfast, making sure to do the dishes after, hating to come home to that chore. She flicks on the weather, noting the drop in temperature, so she grabs an extra hoodie and makes sure she has her beanie before she exits her apartment. She takes the elevator down to the lowest floor, unlocking her storage unit and retrieving her old boombox. She frowns when she realizes it doesn’t have an AUX connection, so she’ll have to settle for listening to the radio. She makes sure the power cord is in the back and locks up her unit.The drive over is uneventful, the rain coming down harder, the sky just as dreary as when she awoke. Tobin’s in a good mood, ready to tackle the day. Her plans include assembling the bed in the attic and cleaning the entire first floor to be ready to move the furniture on Saturday. She’s brought over some extra cleaning products and a broom, mop and bucket. She’s ready. She parks close to the house, happy she’s able to bring everything in with her in one trip. As she walks in, she realizes she should probably get a rug for her entrance, her wet work boots making tracks on the floor. She also realizes that the narrow table upstairs would be perfect in her foyer. She hopes it cleans up well. She raises the thermostat up, wanting to take the chill out of the house. After she unpacks her supplies, she scans the living from where she stands at the kitchen island. She finds her notepad and creates a shopping list adding an entry rug, wood cleaner, fresh cleaning cloths. On her to do list she adds chimney sweep. She knows nothing about fireplaces except the ones you turn on. This one is for real wood. I’ll need to buy wood this winter, she adds it to her list. She stops on the second floor to grab the work light for the attic, wanting to be sure she can take some nice photos. She finds an outlet and plugs it in, pulling out her phone and sending her Dad images of the desk, side tables, narrow table and the wardrobe. Just as she lays her hand on the first piece of the bedframe, her phone chimes with a FaceTime call. It’s her Dad. “Hey, Pop!” Tobin greets with a smile, “How are you?” “Peanut! Where did you find this stuff?” he says, shaking his head, “It’s incredible!” “The attic,” she replies, switching the view to show him the room. She slowly walks over to the desk, “Isn’t this cool?” “Very,” he grins, “is the top bubbled when you touch it?” he asks. Tobin runs her hand over the surface, shaking her head. “It’s super smooth, Dad.” His smile increases, “Just clean it with a mild wood cleaner, like Murphy’s Oil Soap. Use new clean cloths and don’t try to rub the finish off. If that doesn’t lift the grim, then use mineral spirits and cheesecloth to clean it. Test it on the inside of the desk before you start to make sure it doesn’t lift the finish. Then use a wood wax, just read the directions.” “Got it,” Tobin nods, “is there a good website for this type of stuff?” “Check out Bob Vila,” he replies, “he’s very smart and has videos on how to do a bunch of stuff. I’ll text you the link.” “Awesome, thanks,” Tobin smiles, not realizing the camera is still turned away from her. “Is that a bedframe?” Her father asks, loudly. “Yeah,” Tobin says, moving closer to it, “I was gonna set it up and see if I like it.” “Send me a pic,” he says, “that looks sharp. Old, too.” “I will.” “If I wasn’t on this project for the next two weeks, I’d be there, kiddo.” He says, smiling at her now that Tobin has changed the view back. “This is the fun part.” “Yeah,” she smiles broadly, “it really is. I didn’t think this would be so cool.” They talk some more about the house, Tobin asking how she should best put the trim back on, if she could do it be herself or would need an extra set of hands. He asks about the furnace, a chimney sweep, which she gladly tells him is on her list to be done before she attempts to make a fire. They chat for ten more minutes before he is called away, giving Tobin one last congratulations on her good fortune in finding these unique pieces. “Send me pics after they’ve been cleaned up,” he urges before they end their call. She moves to grab the headboard when her phones goes off again. This time it’s her Mom. “Hi honey!” she says, “How are you?” “Hey Mom, I’m good!” Tobin replies, deciding to sit against the wall for this call. They talk about the house, Tobin telling her about her latest finds, Alex and her research on the property, Allie letting her use some furniture and general catching up. When they hang up, Tobin decides to just go to the home improvement store and buy her supplies so she doesn’t have to leave later on and then get back and start working without interruptions. She makes two trips into the house, bags of fresh cleaning cloths, cheesecloth packages and wood waxes and cleaners. She found a cool mop she likes better than her old one, she selected small rugs from the front and back doors and in a moment of brilliance, she purchased a third and fourth rug for the landing of the basement steps and the doorway of the attic to keep from tracking dirt throughout the house. She laughed to herself thinking that she’s turning into her Mother with all of this rug business. She takes the tags off the rugs, putting them in place and then bounding back upstairs with her radio in hand. She gets the headboard leaned up against the side walls, brings the long pieces out, laying them on the floor and studies how they should connect. After a couple of attempts, she gets them in place and easily connects the footboard. It’s heavy. She pushes against it, it doesn’t move. It’s solid. It’s nice, almost a Shaker piece with clean angular lines, a simple pattern Tobin likes. She decides this will be for her room. It looks like a queen size so her mattress will fit. Her Dad had suggested setting the desk on boards off the floor and putting down a tarp so as not to get the floor messy during her cleaning. She finds two pieces of wood in the basement that will work and gets it together. She’s got some tunes on, working carefully on the desk, excitedly seeing the true dark, rich color coming through. She doesn’t polish the brass handles and knobs, choosing just to clean them gently, liking the patina of age they show. The drawers are balanced face up on the canvas tarp, giving her room to work on the desk. She gets the job done faster than she anticipated, deciding to work on the trunk before polishing the dressers. The work goes quickly and soon she’s cleaned all of the pieces and it’s only lunch time. She feels that she’s made wonderful progress and she celebrates by feeding herself downstairs. After finishing her quick lunch, Tobin decides to do the floors on the main level. She wants to have those done and she considers them a priority over cleaning the furniture. She sweeps the entire first floor, catching the debris in the pan and tossing it the garbage. It’s not very dirty and the floors look in good shape. She might not have to wax then after all, she considers. As she works on the task, her mind wanders, wondering how Alex’s trip to LA is going for her. She didn’t mention what it was about and Tobin didn’t ask and she’s not sure why. Alex. She’s really cool. A little guarded, but super fun when she relaxes. Dinner was nice, she seemed to have a good time. They flirted, well, Alex really started it. That kiss. Those kisses. She’s a really good kisser. I can’t wait to see her again. Should I text her and see how it’s going, she wonders, she shakes her head, it’s only been a day. I’ll let her contact me. She continues mopping, the shine reflecting on the floor. Once that task is completed, she heads back upstairs, waxes and cheesecloths in hand, ready to wax the furniture. She reads the directions carefully a second time, she had done it once in the store to make sure she purchased everything she needed for the job. She begins with the side tables, taking her time, making sure to spread the wax evenly and not leave any thick residue, setting her timer to let it set and starting on the next one. She grins as her timer beeps just as she finishes the second table, changing out the wax cloth for a fresh, clean cheesecloth. The wood grain becomes apparent as she removes the film of wax, showing the medium tone of the table. They look wonderful. She had carefully inspected each piece before she even cleaned them for any damage and was surprised to find them in excellent shape. All of the furniture was like that with the exception of the trunk. It had a few scratches on the surface, the metal latches slightly dented from travel, she assumed. She thought it gave the piece character and added to the age of it. She’s singing along with the radio, working on the narrow table, realizing the wood tone matches the smaller tables. They belong together, she hums to herself, those three pieces will look perfect in the foyer and living room. When she finishes waxing all of the pieces except the desk and the desk chair, she decides to take a break. She sits against the wall, leaning back to nap for a few minutes. She has another timer set to notify her it’s time to leave so she can shower and be at Allie’s for dinner. She gets a chill, crossing her arms, hands in her armpits, shrugging to ward it off as she closes her eyes and leans her head back. She opens her eyes and sees the woman from the photo she found yesterday walking amongst the furniture. She’s wearing a long, flowing dress similar to the one in the photo, silently moving from piece to piece. She stops at the desk, fingers gliding across the top, a small smile playing on her lips. She looks up at Tobin. “This is lovely,” she says, her voice a higher pitch with a slight French accent, a smile on her face. “Thanks,” Tobin says, staying in place, “it’s wonderful to give them new life.” The woman smiles wistfully at her, “New life,” she murmurs, drawing out the words, “second chances are rare to find, I’m glad you found these.” Tobin is mesmerized by her greenish, greyish eyes. “Uh, so am I.” The scent of violets fills the room. The woman looks at Tobin intently, eying her carefully, “I’ll see you around,” she says, walking silently out of the room. Tobin’s jarred awake from her alarm, fumbling for her phone to shut it off. She’s in the same place, her hoodie is draped across her chest. I don’t remember doing that, she thinks to herself, shrugging as she gets up and stretches. I must have done that in my sleep. Sleep. I was napping. She must have been a dream, she considers, thinking of the woman. She remembers to snap photos of the pieces she has finished. She’ll send them out later. She shuts off the radio and bright work light and walks across the room, floorboards creaking as she exits the room.The floor didn’t creak when she left, Tobin thinks, she shakes her head, it was just a dream. She takes the stairs to the main level, pleased to see that she will not have to wax the floors at all. They’ve been recently refinished so they probably have a decent coat of wax on them already, she reasons. She puts her hoodie on, along with her jacket, still a bit chilled. She gathers her backpack, checking herself for her phone, wallet and keys. She double checks that she has the key ring for this house, placing them in a zippered pocket before exiting the house. Dinner is pizza served on paper plates. Tobin poured the wine she brought into plastic cups. They talk about a how it’s a flashback to college. The apartment is completely packed, boxes all over. Feeling like celebrating, Tobin stopped off at a bakery before she got home and picked up a chocolate cream pie, knowing it is Allie’s weakness. Becky, Zola, Kling, Sinc, Kat and Emily Menges are there with Allie and Bati as well, telling Tobin they are helping out tomorrow and can’t wait to see her house. They also insist on Tobin telling them when she’s moving and they’ll help her. She shows them the before and after photos of the furniture she found and they didn’t believe her when she shared how she cleaned and waxed them. “When did you become so handy?” Kling questions, eying her suspiciously. “I don’t know!” Tobin laughs, shrugging and raising her hands up, fingers splayed, palms outward. “You should look for a manufacturer’s tag or a model number on those,” Emily suggests, “it might give you an idea of what year they were made.” “Ooh, that’s a good idea,” Tobin agrees, “I didn’t think of it.” Sinc asks if she’s keeping everything as it is on the main floor. “Yeah, I like the colors so far, it’s pretty neutral so I think it’s fine.” Tobin replies, “I think after I finish the study, my bedroom and get the hallway trim stained and put up, I’ll probably finish packing and move in. The other rooms won’t be a mess to work in while I’m there.” “What are you doing for Thanksgiving?” Kat asks as she takes another slice of pizza from the box. “Sticking around here, I’ll go to my Mom’s for Christmas.” Tobin shares. Everyone else is heading out of town for the holiday, Becky frowning at Tobin. “You shouldn’t be alone for Thanksgiving,” she says quietly. Tobin waves at her, “It’s fine, my Dad might come up if he’s finished with his project,” she says, “it’s not a big deal.” They look unconvinced, “Why don’t we call this our Thanksgiving,” she says standing up and moving to the fridge and pulling out the pie she snuck in. “I’ve brought pie!” “Is that a chocolate cream pie?” Allie asks dramatically, her eyes growing wide at the sinful treat. “Yep,” Tobin grins, setting it on the table with plenty of plastic forks. Allie abandons her pizza, pulling the pie in front of her, opening the package and taking a forkful right from the container. Laughing, Sinc moves the pie to the center of the table and they all grab forks and follow suit, laughing as they eat. It’s late when Tobin gets back to her apartment, tired and happy from the fun they had together. The downer of the night is when Becky tells them that it’s looking like her Kansas City team will cease operations and the club will move to Salt Lake City. They ponder what the moves means for the league, if it’s as stable as the owners are telling them it is. They all know Boston is in deep trouble, players were trying to get out of there as fast as they could only to be told they wouldn’t make a trade unless it if was better for the team. On the other hand, there’s talk of expansion and they all agree that the MLS owners should be the ones stepping up and taking on a women’s team. There might be some private owners out there who would do a good job, but then it would have it be in a popular soccer city. She tosses her keys on the table in the hall, her backpack on the floor. She goes to her room and gets ready for bed, knowing tomorrow will be a busy day. November 11, 2017 Tobin mans the gate button as the five cars pull in to her driveway. She doesn’t exactly know how to keep the gate open and thinks maybe it’s better she doesn’t just yet. She can just imagine leaving it open and having people roaming around her property or something crazy. The group pile out of their vehicles, looking up at house. Tobin remembers that most of them haven’t seen it yet. She smiles as she heads off the porch to greet them. Allie slides out of the passenger seat of a large van they had rented for the day, Bati popping out from the driver’s side. “Harry, what do you want to do first?” Tobin asks, pulling her beanie down over her ears. It’s cool out and she forgot to grab her jacket. “Let’s do the van and two of you guys can follow us back to load up again,” Allie suggests, looking at Sinc and Kat, “would that be cool?” Everyone nods, “Make’s sense,” Tobin agrees, “I’ll get the doors open,” she says, heading back to the porch and fixing the latch of the screen door to keep it open and then opening the inner wood door all the way. “Har,” she says, nudging Allie who has a kitchen chair in her hands, “why don’t you stay in and direct where everything should go?” “That’s your job, Harry!” She complains as she walks, “You should be doing that!” Tobin takes a chair from Bati and goes inside, “You’ll just change it,” she grins at Allie. “But just put the mattress in the living room, the master isn’t finished yet.” Allie laughs, “You’re right,” she nods, “go get the table.” Allie takes over, helping to guide in the sofa so they don’t bump the walls, moving the table to her liking. They get the van emptied quickly, then move to the cars that are filled with boxes. Allie directs the organizing in the basement, knowing what other boxes are coming to leave room for them. Sinc, Kat, Allie and Bati depart after that, going to load up again. “Hey,” Tobin says to Kling and Emily, “I’ve some stuff upstairs that should come down, want to get it with me?” she asks. They eagerly agree, wanting to see the furniture Tobin had told them about the night before. They clamor upstairs, teasing Tobin about the rugs and making a show of wiping their feet. “Woah!” Emily says, walking into the attic, “This is incredible.” The attic runs the length and width of the house. Kling issues a low whistle as she nears the desk. “Wow, this is something.” Tobin beams at them, “Can you believe they just left it here?” They shake their heads. They walk around, looking at each piece, asking Tobin how she got them into such amazing shape. Tobin looks at her watch, “We should probably get moving,” she says, moving to the end tables, “I can take these if you’ll take that narrow table.” They get the items down and leave them in the kitchen, keeping them out of the way until they’re done unloading everything. Becky and Zola arrive with the van and Sinc and Kat. When they finish unloading the van, Emily tells Allie about the desk upstairs. “You should really see it!” she urges. “Is it all ready to come down?” she asks Tobin, partly so she doesn’t have to go up there. “Yeah, but I think it’s pretty heavy.” Tobin says. “Where do you want this stuff, Tobin?” Zola asks, looking around the heavy furniture. "Uh, you guys don’t have it to move it,” Tobin demures. Bati moves to the desk, “You want this in the study?” he motions to Zola, “let’s go.” The guys heft the desk out, slowly moving it down the stairs. Tobin trails behind, asking them to just put it in the center of the room. Since the master bedroom isn’t finished, Tobin suggests bringing the bed and wardrobe down and leaving it in the living room for now. Kling grabs two of the floor rugs and has them place the wardrobe on it so it will slide easily when it’s time to move it. “What’s in the boxes?” Sinc asks, pointing to them. “I don’t know,” Tobin shrugs. “Shall we find out?” Allie grins. “Where do you have a pry bar?” Emily asks, looking around the room. “In the master,” Tobin directs, she didn’t take them out after her and Bati removed the trim. Emily bounds the stairs to get them. “Dude!” Becky exclaims, she’s standing by the wall where the wardrobe was, a finger trailing along it. The others gather near her, “What?” Tobin asks. “I think there’s a door,” Becky says, pointing out the line on the wood planks of the wall. There’s a chair rail piece of trim at waist level, Bati squatting down to look. He takes his phone out and turns the flashlight on.“There’s a key hole!” he says excitedly. “This must be the access to the turret.” Tobin mumbles, patting her pockets for the keys but then remembering they’re in her backpack. “You have a turret?” Becky asks, her mouth dropping open in wonder. “Uh, yeah,” Tobin says, “I’m gonna get my keys.” She trots out of the room, down the stairs and gets them from her backpack. As she climbs the attic stairs, she hears the group loudly exclaiming over something. “What’s up?” she asks as she enters. “Look!” Allie proclaims, pointing to Sinc. She’s holding a colorful glass lampshade. Tobin sees the Emily and Kling each have one in their hands. “These are fucking Tiffany!” Kling exclaims. “Holy shit!” Tobin says, walking over to them. Bati pulls a metal base from of the wood crates they opened. “It’s in perfect condition.” He murmurs, turning it over to inspect it. He points the side of the base, “Look, there’s a signature.” Sure enough, it’s marked Louis Comfort Tiffany.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Tobin begins trying each key on her ring to open the door to the turret. She’s concentrating as she works, not wanting to miss a key and have to start over. “It’s freezing in here,” Kling complains, rubbing her arms. “Yeah,” Becky agrees, “like all of the sudden.” An immense crash comes from downstairs, it’s so loud, it rattles the windows in the attic.“What the fuck!” Bati exclaims as they all sprint to the door. Tobin abandons the turret door, hurrying behind them as they move down the stairs. Sinc, Kat, Emily and Kling fan out on the second floor, searching the rooms. Tobin, Becky, Zola, Bati and Allie spread out on the main floor, looking for the source of the noise. The other girls join them all with questioning looks on their faces. “What was that?” Kling asks, looking at them all. They shrug. “I’ll check downstairs,” Bati offers, “why don’t some of you look outside?” he asks as he heads for the basement door. Allie’s moving to the front door as he speaks. Kling and Kat follow her. “That was so weird,” Sinc says, eying the living room, everything is in place, there’s nothing on the walls yet that could have fallen. Bati comes back up declaring everything was fine in the basement. Kling comes back in the house, “Allie wants to go to Mike’s.” “Sounds good,” Tobin agrees, feeling hungry now. She looks at her watch and sees it’s almost four and none of them have eaten lunch. She doesn’t want everyone to be starving because they were helping her. She internally smacks her head for not insisting on a lunch break earlier. She was too caught up in moving everything. “I’ll lock up and meet you meet you there.” They all filter out and Tobin decides to order an Uber so she can have a few beers tonight. She’ll need it, knowing she’s saying goodbye to Allie. When Tobin approaches the table, she swears the conversation stops for a second, like they were talking about something they didn’t want her to hear. But then Emily gestures to her as she sits across from her and next to Allie. “Send me pics on the desk and wardrobe, my Mom will check it out. She’s into antiques. Look for any markings on them and send them over.” She offers. “Oh, yeah,” Becky says, “I know a lamp place in the city, I’ll ask them if they can check out the ones we found.” She nods, “You should get them looked over to make sure they’re safe to use and what types of bulbs they need.” Drinks are delivered and Tobin takes a sip of the beer Allie ordered for her, losing that sense of unease when she walked in. “Thanks guys, I appreciate it.” She smiles. “It’s kind of cool,” Kat says grinning, “like a mystery, finding out how old stuff is and when or where it was made.” “I want to know all of the of the updates.” Allie states, “I’m gonna miss being here for this.” She frowns. Silence settles over the table, they all know by now that she’s getting traded. “I’ll keep everyone in the loop,” Tobin says, nudging Allie’s shoulder, “I promise.” “I’m heading home in a couple of weeks,” Kling chimes in, “when do you think you’ll officially move?” she asks Tobin. “Probably the first week of December.” She replies. “We’ll be around,” Zola offers, “let us know.” “Me too,” Emily adds. Sinc nods, “I should be around.” Kat nods with her. Tobin nods, “Okay, I will,” she says, grateful for her friends, “but I promise to feed you much earlier than this. Sorry.” “Tobs,” Allie elbows her, “I wasn’t even hungry until I got outside and realized the time.” “Yeah,” Becky adds, “I was too caught up in checking everything out.” Tobin’s not completely convinced but she smiles and nods. She still feels bad. “Well, this is on me and don’t argue.” She states firmly. They nod and proclaim they’re going to order the most expensive items on the menu. They all laugh at that because this place only serves pizza, appetizers and drinks. “I’ll call so much you won’t even miss me,” Allie promises, wiping the tears from Tobin’s eyes. She hugs her tightly, “You’ll be fine, Harry.” She whispers into her ear. She’s flying out tomorrow for the National Team Camp and then a couple of matches. Tobin can’t speak. For one, she’s pretty drunk, having six beers while they ate and hung out and two, she’s far too emotional for words. She knows if she tries to say something, she’ll just start sobbing. She nods, sniffling her nose, giving Allie a sad smile, not wanting to break down in front of the restaurant. Allie leaves her arms, taking Bati’s hand, making Tobin remember her wedding day and briefly thinking through her alcohol clouded mind that Allie is his wife and has responsibilities to him. She should be happy for her best friend and not selfish she’s leaving.“Say hi to your folks for me,” Tobin breathes out, her voice uneven, watching Allie nod back at her, trying to stop her tears as well before she turns and walks quickly with Bati to the parking lot. Tobin feels an arm on her shoulder, “Did you drive?” Sinc asks, wiping her own eyes, taking a deep breath. “Nah,” Tobin says, sniffing again, “knew I’d drink too much.” Sinc nods. They say goodbye to everyone else and she guides her to her car. Once in, Tobin’s clumsily buckling her seatbelt when she hears Sinc let out a big sigh. “That was rough,” she shakes her head. “Yeah,” Tobin agrees. She starts the car, “Which house?” “The new one,” Tobin says, “I’ll crash on the couch, my stuff is there.” Sinc nods and begins driving. They’re in Tobin’s driveway, Tobin fumbling for her keys. “You’re staying here, right?” Sinc asks, “No going anywhere else?” Tobin nods, “I’m crashing here, dude, I won’t drive anywhere.” She says, knowing Christine is looking out for her. “Alright,” Sinc gives her a smile, “I’ll talk to you soon, maybe you can teach me how to scrap some wall paper,” she says with a grin, “I heard it’s a good workout.” “Ha!” Tobin laughs, “You’re on,” she gives her an awkward hug across the car seats, “later, dude. Have a good camp and try not to kill them when you play.” Sinc’s leaving tomorrow for Canada’s camp to prepare for their friendlies against the US team.“Goodnight,” she says, nodding. She stays until Tobin is in the house and then pulls out on to the street and drives away. Tobin sees it’s only seven o’clock and she’s pretty drunk and doesn’t know what to do with herself. She decides the smartest thing she could do right now is to drink some water and go to sleep. She kicks her shoes off, goes to the kitchen and grabs a water bottle. She doesn’t have any clothes here to change into so she grabs her hoodie, yanks the blanket off the back of Allie’s couch and lays down. She’s chilled so she flips onto her stomach, snuggling into the throw pillow bringing the blanket up around her shoulders. Sleep comes quick. Sometime during the night, she dreams. The woman is back, approaching her as she sits on the couch. “Bonjour, amore,” she says breathily, sitting next to her. Tobin watches as the woman gently trails her cool fingers along her jawline, before slowly leaning in to kiss. Their lips meet, the woman is aggressive, persistently tonguing at Tobin’s mouth, Tobin parting her lips, twisting their tongues together. The woman is running her fingers through Tobin’s hair, pulling her head back and attacking her neck with feverish kisses. Tobin’s running her hands along her sides, as the woman sucks lightly just below Tobin’s ear, sending a shiver down her spine. She feels her bring a hand to her breast, rhythmically massaging, moaning from her touch. Tobin begins to place soft kisses on her neck, but it only lasts a moment before the woman pushes her back slightly. “Close your eyes,” she says. Tobin does as she’s told. When she wakes, she’s confused looking around to find she’s alone. She feels the burning in her stomach, coming up her throat, she gets heartburn just as often as she inhales pizza and over serves herself, which is to say, not very often at all. She rises from the couch, gets a water bottle from the fridge, drinks most of it and slouches back down, sitting angled with her feet on the coffee table, covering herself with the blanket and tries to get some sleep. November 12, 2017 The morning comes even faster with the bright rays of the sun reminding Tobin she needs to purchase drapes for the living room. All the rooms, actually. She falls to her side, turns her head in towards the back cushions of the couch and brings the blanket over her head. She goes back to sleep. It’s Sunday and she doesn’t know what she wants to do with herself today. She’s back at her apartment, eaten breakfast, went on a run and is now pondering what she should tackle. She decides that the master bedroom should be her focus and she should prepare the walls for painting. If she can get that room and the study completed before Thanksgiving, she’d feel really good about it. She gets on her works clothes, packing a bag of extra clothes in case she decides to sleep there, even bringing toiletries and towels to shower. She grabs a thick blanket on the way out the door, nodding to herself that she has everything she needs. She stops at the Ace Hardware store that’s fast becoming her third home, getting the supplies for preparing the walls. She’s got the glue layer to put over the existing plaster, extra sheets for the sander, a new trim brush and some rollers. The nice sales guy recommended she get a good quality respirator and safety glasses when she explained what she was doing. He helped her pick those out. She also purchased ten more disposable drop cloths for when she attacks the other rooms. She likes going there because they really help, listen to her questions and explain the differences in the products so she can make a good decision.She’s all set up and ready to go. Music is on, the work light is angled to the ceiling, the drop cloth covering the wardrobe, one more on the ground around it. She was impressed with how much scaffolding was left, she found more pieces out in the garage, enough to almost go around half of the room. She decides she’ll work from the outer perimeter in towards the center. She makes sure to shut the door that leads to the bathroom and walk in closet. She shoves a few rags on the bottom so the dust won’t escape into it too much and does the same with the hallway door. She’s glad she remembered yesterday to get some wood pieces and have Bati and Zola put the wardrobe on it for easier cleaning. Her Dad had told her she shouldn’t worry about too many imperfections in the ceilings and walls explaining how with plaster being done by hand, it gave character to have waves and sometimes seeing marks from the trowel. Her job with the ceiling is to just knock off a light coat, giving the glue something to grip before laying the coat of finishing plaster.She starts in the far corner, gently gliding the sander over the surface, it’s not too bad as she works, shaking her head to clear the dust from her safety glasses. She switches her hand positions often, her arms growing tired from holding the sander above her and the vibration of it numbing her fingers. By the time she has the first wall section completed, she’s ready for a break. She climbs off the scaffolding, finding her water bottle and sits on the scaffold. She removes the mask to take a drink. She feels a sense of pride in doing this, envisioning the final look of the room, wondering how long the drapes should be on the large window facing her side yard. She’ll have to call her Mom and ask her. She changes the sandpaper on the sander, switching it out for a fresh piece, ready to start the next section. By lunchtime, she’s finished the whole perimeter of the room. She arranges the scaffolding for the next section, then leaves the room to eat something. She’s hungry from her work. By two o’clock she has the next section completed, stopping to open the windows to move some air and rid the room of the hazy dust. Next time she leaves, she’ll grab the fan to put in the window and draw it out. She takes a photo of her dusty self, holding the sanding, her cheeks high under her safety glasses from grinning behind the respirator. She sends it out to her family. They find it hilarious. Tobin has to stop when her stomach won’t stop grumbling and her hunger becomes fierce. She figures she has only two sections to go, just about a twenty by eight foot section in the middle of the room. She turns off the sander, setting it down and getting off the scaffold. She pats herself as much as she can to rid herself of the dust, again wishing she had a handheld vacuum to clean herself up a little. The fan has removed a good amount of the haze in the room, but Tobin shuts the door behind her as she leaves to get to the kitchen and eat anything she can. As she eats her second peanut butter and jelly sandwich, she contemplates her next steps, she thinks she’ll continue using the sander, getting all of the walls prepped and then only have to clean it once before she applies the glue. Work smarter, not harder. She decides she wants to finish the ceiling tonight, then shower and change. She will not get in her car in these dusty clothes. She’s excited to take a shower here, the master bath has a rainfall shower head with side nozzles. Maybe she’ll go to the hot tub in her apartment building and soak later. She gets her respirator and glasses back on, switching out the paper again on her sander and gets to work. November 13, 2017 When Tobin wakes up and squints at her clock, she’s surprised to find it’s ten thirty in the morning. She rolls on her back, her shoulders and arms sore, closing her eyes and falling back to sleep. It’s almost one when she’s back at the house, ready to start the walls. A hot shower and applying some arnica cream to her shoulders and arms has Tobin feeling much better. She’s ready to tackle the job. I’ll take walls over ceilings any day, Tobin thinks to herself as she removes the respirator. She lets it hang down around her neck as she puts the glasses on the brim of her hat. She shakes her arms out, does a few quick stretches to loosen them up, curling her hands into fists and spreading her fingers to alleviate the tingling sensation in them from the hours of using the sander. She’s not nearly as dusty as she was from the ceiling work, the fan took most of the haze out of the room as she shuts the window. It’s brisk in here, she shakes herself, catching a slight chill. She’s ready to eat the last of whatever is in the house, have a beer to celebrate and then think about how to clean up this dusty mess. Two hours later she is congratulating herself. I am brilliant, she pats herself on the back with her right hand, thank you very much. She used the ShopVac to vacuum up the floor, then did the ceiling and walls. She did the floor again before using her Swiffer mop with a damp pad to clean the ceiling, walls and floor to complete the project. She took the ShopVac to the garage to clean it out, dumping the dusty remains in an empty bucket, remembering she needs to call about a trash service for her garbage removal. As she locks the garage’s side door, she sees Karen next door, carrying a colorful cylinder towards the fence. “Hey Karen,” she calls as she strolls near the fence, “how’s it going?” “Hi Tobin!” Karen greets with a smile, “Great! How about you?” “Doing good,” she replies, “getting some stuff done.” “That’s awesome,” Karen puts the cylinder down on a base on the ground, “happy to hear it.” “That’s cool,” Tobin saying the artistic piece, “you make that?” “Uh huh,” she says, “I’m thinking of putting a few out here.” “That’ll look cool,” Tobin says turning to look at her yard. It’s pretty empty, “I haven’t even given a thought to what I should do out here yet.” “Don’t then,” Karen grins, “it’ll overwhelm you and make you nuts. Just keep doing what you’re doing. Think about it later.” “That’s a good plan,” Tobin grins back with a nod, “I like that.” “Plus, it will be winter anyway, with the snow, it doesn’t matter.” Karen reasons. “Yeah, maybe I’ll get a landscaper to give me some ideas,” Tobin thinks aloud. “My partner’s a landscaper,” Karen offers, “she tells me all the time what she’d do with your backyard.” She laughs. “Oh yeah?” Tobin laughs, “Well, I’d love to hear her ideas sometime, seriously.” “She’d love to tell you!” Karen laughs. “Hey, if you two would like to come by for a beer and a tour,” Tobin offers, suddenly realizing she’s missing some human contact. “How about now?” Karen shrugs her shoulders. “Sounds good,” Tobin grins, happy to have them, “I’ll leave the front gate open, okay?” Karen nods, “We’ll see you in a few minutes,” “Cool,” Tobin smiles. I’m meeting my new neighbors, she thinks, feeling a little giddy, in my new house. Karen and her partner Jamie enter with some chips and salsa and a tray of veggies and dip. Tobin’s glad to have a kitchen table to sit at as they each sip their beers and munch on the appetizers as Tobin tells them about the house and how she’s having it researched. “So, Jamie,” Tobin says as she finishes chewing her carrot stick, “I hear you’ve got some ideas on my yard.” Jamie blushes in embarrassment, “Well, uh,” “No, seriously,” Tobin says, nodding her head encouragingly, “I’ll need some help.” “Well,” Jamie says slowly, “I guess I would have to know some ideas of what type of space you wanted to create.”Tobin smiles and shrugs, “I haven’t given it a thought,” she says, “I’ve only been thinking about the inside.” “So, the timing is perfect then,” Karen interjects, “as you complete what you’re doing in here, you’ll figure out what you want outside. It’ll be a natural progression.” “How so?” Tobin questions, she likes these two already. They’re both laid back, Karen more outgoing than Jamie. “Like, say in the spring, you realize that maybe you want to be able to entertain outside in the summer, well, how do you entertain? Is it formal, informal, do you cook, do you eat outside, that sort of thing.” “Huh,” Tobin nods, “yeah, I don’t know.” She takes a sip of her beer, “I’ve lived in apartments up until now.” “Clean palette,” Jamie murmurs, looking up. “So, we’d have a fresh start, like, we can put up a gazebo, install an outdoor kitchen, TVs, the whole thing.” “That would be sweet,” Tobin grins, thinking something like that would be awesome for team dinners.“So, you just think of how you entertain and then I can give you ideas of how to make your style fit outside,” Jamie explains, warming up to the subject. “Definitely,” Tobin agrees, “I’ll start writing down ideas as they come.” “Yeah, and anything you see elsewhere, like, if you’re at a restaurant and see something cool, a friend’s house, write it down, take a photo, stuff like that.” She says smiling t her. “Totally,” Tobin smiles, “I can do that.” The finish their beers and Tobin asks if they want to see the house. Both claim to have never been in here so it’s a treat. “This is incredible,” Karen says softly, walking around the attic. Jamie is quiet, taking it all in. “But I haven’t been able to get into the trunk or that door,” Tobin says, pointing to the wall. They both look at her questioningly and she motions them to follow her. “See?” she points to the hidden lock. “Huh,” Karen shrugs, “where does it lead?” “The turret, I think,” Tobin shrugs, “I guess,” “I know a guy,” Jamie says softly, “quiet, discreet. He could get in whatever you wanted opened.” Tobin must have a look on her face because Karen interjects, “He’s a good guy, on the level, he just wouldn’t tell anyone he was here or anything.” Jamie nods at Tobin, “He’s not a criminal or anything, he’s, like, an underground locksmith,” she says, “stays out of people’s business.” “Oh,” Tobin says, nodding, “it’d be cool if he came by.” “I’ll let you know,” Jamie says, “he travels a lot for work so sometimes he’s hard to get a hold of.” She shivers suddenly, looking over her shoulder and around the room. A cool draft comes across the three of them. “So, you’re having this place researched?” Karen asks, Tobin had mentioned it briefly downstairs. “Yeah, someone from the Historical society is looking in to it.” She replies. “That’s cool,” Jamie grins, “hope you don’t find any skeletons.” Tobin laughs easily, leading them out of the room, “It’ll be interesting to find out.” They have another beer together and then Karen and Jamie leave, insisting she come over if she ever needs anything. They invite her to dinner on Wednesday next week and Tobin happily accepts. They exchange numbers and head out. As Karen shut the gate, her and Jamie turn to wave to Tobin on the porch. They walk hand in hand back towards their house. “Well?” Karen asks, squeezing Jamie’s hand. “She’s back,” she says quietly, “I could feel it when we were in the attic.” Karen sighs, “What are we gonna do?” Karen asks, “I really like Tobin.” “We have to finish it this time.” Jamie says determinedly, “She has to be stopped.” Tobin’s not hungry from munching on the food they brought over, so she decides to move the scaffolding and reconfigure it into more of a box type platform so she can apply the glue tomorrow. Once she gets it in place, she heads down to the basement to review her supplies. The workbench area is a mess, so she retrieves the sawhorses and finds an old door in the garage that would work to make a table in the basement. She begins organizing what is on the bench and spreads across her makeshift table. Two newer tool boxes loaded with tools, tape, and electrical pieces and things she had no idea what they were. Two large buckets of the light tan paint that’s throughout the first floor and extends up the stairs. She leaves those on the floor. One is completely full and the other maybe half. She finds the glue, there’s four gallons of that, there’s the extra paint rollers she didn’t remember were there, the paint trays, liners, and even some sandpaper for the sander. There’s a can of plaster patch for any repairs, more scrapers, a few paint brushes that are decent, a weird metal grill that looks like her kitchen vent piece, another roller and the leaning against the wall, a stick. It looks like a broom handle but the end has a cap that you can screw something on it. Oh, Tobin slaps her forehead, it’s the extender for the roller to use while painting. She grins, grabbing some of the painting supplies and taking them upstairs to put in the master bedroom. Tomorrow when she takes a break, she thinks she’ll do the same thing, organize what’s in the garage. It would save her time and money and keep her from needlessly going to the store if she’s already got it. She’s ready for tomorrow, the room is prepped. She sits at the kitchen table, nibbling on the vegetables while she watches some videos on her phone about applying the glue. She remembers she needs to grab the mixing tool from the garage and the drill so she can mix the glue well. While watching one of the videos, she sees the worker using a five gallon bucket and the screen she has downstairs to catch the excess glue. By the calculations on the glue can, she’ll probably use nearly two gallons just in her room, so maybe she’ll try that instead of constantly refilling the paint trays. She thinks about Alex, she hasn’t heard from her at all, so she texts her the photo of her with the respirator and glasses on, dusty from sanding. She types something silly about sanding history as a joke. She puts the veggie dish and dip in the fridge, ready to go home for the night. Another trip to the pool to relax in the hot tub for a bit, then shower, and check in with Allie. Then sleep. November 14, 2017 Tobin meets Emily and Kat for breakfast, they were up early working out and were thoughtful enough to invite Tobin to meet them at the diner near her apartment. They catch up while they eat, Tobin telling them what’s she doing with the house and they offer to come over to scrap walls the next day. They agree on a time and depart. Tobin stops at the grocery store, loading up on snacks, some more lunchmeat and drinks before getting to the house. She unloads quickly, wanting to get to work. Applying the glue is pretty simple. The videos she watched saves her time and soon the whole room is rolled out. She intentionally left glue in the can, using that while she brushed the corners, making sure not to overlap layers and keeping it as smooth as possible. She’s done before four and decides to take a nap. As she lays on the couch, she realizes she never heard from Alex. She texts her again, a simple hey and how’s it going, not sure if she’s back from LA or not. She puts her phone on the floor, then rolls over, pulling the blanket up on her shoulders. She dreams. When she wakes, she’s smiling but doesn’t know why. She just feels happy and content. She tries and she just can’t remember what she was dreaming about, it’s like it’s on the tip of her brain but she can’t recall it. It frustrates her. She gets up, stretching her arms above her head, arching her back, letting out a yawn. She picks up her phone and is disappointed in not seeing a reply from Alex. She tosses her phone on the couch and heads up to the attic. She wants to try all of the keys on her ring and see if she can open the door. The key ring has about twenty keys on it, some are tiny, some larger, one is very old fashioned, like a skeleton key you see in movies. Halfway through the ring, she kneels down, her back stiffening from being hunched over. She gets through the ring without being able to unlock the door. Disappointed, she slowly gets up. She goes into the study, grabbing a few of the disposable plastic drop cloths and tapes them to the floor so they can clean the wall paper pieces easily tomorrow. Satisfied that the house is coming along, she shuts off the lights, locking up and heading home.She has dinner plans with her neighbors tomorrow, so Tobin packs a bag that night with a change of clothes so she can get ready at the house. Emily and Kat need to leave by five, they have an appearance somewhere later. November 15, 2017 When Tobin rolls out of bed, she sees she has a message from Alex. It simply asks, if they can meet on Friday at nine in the morning. Tobin replies quickly and agrees, wondering if she should ask about doing dinner or something. She feels nervous though, especially since Alex hasn’t reached out to her nor responded to her messages really. She decides to wait to and see. Maybe Alex doesn’t use her phone much, or look at her messages, maybe there’s something to explain how Tobin’s feeling unsure of herself about Alex. She’s known Meg and Kat for years, but she doesn’t talk much about her private life with them. She rarely speaks about it to anyone, she’s not singling them out. She just likes to keep to herself. Allie, Kling, Sinc, they know her, they know her better than she knows herself sometimes. Maybe she’ll call Allie after dinner if it’s not too late. The time difference is a bitch, going from west to east, the four hour difference. They’ve played phone tag before, Allie trying to call in the afternoon and getting Tobin when she wakes up. Emily and Kat arrive at nine exactly with smiles on their faces eager to get to work. They laugh and joke as they work, Tobin grateful for the company, the two of them snapping photos of their work and texting it out to teammates. They have lunch at noon, Tobin ordering sandwiches in, and get the room completed around three thirty. As they leave, they laugh about their arm day and how Garga should institute it as part of their training. Tobin thanks them profusely, promising dinner when she’s ready moved in. “Only if you make your Mom’s lasagna!” Emily shouts from her car. Tobin waves and watches them leave. She showers quickly and gets ready for her dinner next door. She dries her hair, puts on a little makeup, a nice sweater and dark jeans.She grabs two bottles of wine she brought from her apartment, hating to go anywhere empty handed. “Hey Tobin, how’s it going?” Karen greets her, giving her a quick hug. “Good, thanks!’ Tobin smiles, handing over the wine, “Here, I brought this, you guys mentioned you liked red when you were over, I hope you like this.” “Ooh, thanks!” she replies, inspecting the label, “I’ve never had this brand but I like Pinot Noir.” “Cool,” Tobin nods, looking around. “Here, let me take your jacket,” Karen offers, Tobin handing it over and she places it on a peg behind the door. “Come on in,” she gestures, “Jamie’s in the kitchen, it’s the heart of the house.” “Hey Tobin, what’s up?” Jamie greets, stirring a pot on the stove, grinning at her. “Hey Jamie, I’m good, what are you making?” Tobin inquires, eying the kitchen. There’s a lot going on. “A food extravaganza, a delectable, delicious delight,” she grins mischievously. “Yeah,” Karen laughs, “you’ve been in the cooking Sherry tonight, huh?” Karen says, nudging her shoulder. “Don’t mind her,” she turns to face Tobin, “she’s a very good cook, but she likes to cook when she’s buzzed.” She turns to Jamie, “Tobin brought wine, you want some?” “Oh yeah,” Jamie says, “I’m making a crab bisque soup, Tobin, and then a small salad to cleanse the palate, and the main course is a pork roast with vegetables.” “Sounds wonderful,” Tobin smiles, “can I help with anything?” “Sure,” Karen says, handing her the wine opener, “get us started on that.” Tobin nods and opens the bottle, pouring three glasses, and feeling comfortable with the two. Karen gestures her to sit at the table, and she sits facing Jamie and the stove. “I really like your décor,” Tobin says, looking around the kitchen that opens into a family room, “it’s comfortable, interesting and, like, relaxed.” “Thanks,” Karen says blushing, “we like it.” “She’s an artist, Tobin, she made most of this stuff.” Jamie chimes in. “Impressive,” Tobin says, taking a sip of her wine, relaxing back in her seat, “do you show in any galleries around here?” she inquires. “Yeah, a few,” Karen says, “I’ve got stuff down in Cali as well, some is Seattle too.” “That’s awesome!” Tobin says genuinely, she loves the energy from creative people, they just have this special vibe about themselves. Over soup they talk about the house, Tobin explaining what’s she doing, and when she intends to officially move in. “How long have you guys lived here?” she asks them, looking up from her soup. It’s delicious. She swears she sees Jamie’s eyes cloud over for just a second, but then Karen answers. “Almost four years,” she says, eying Jamie for a second, “we’d had our eye on it for awhile and were lucky to get it.” “Cool,” Tobin says. “Yeah,” Karen adds, “I needed space for my studio and wanted to be in the city but still have some land, you know?” “Yeah,” Tobin nods her head, “it’s gonna be weird having it be so quiet around here, I’m not used to it.” “That’s about an acre your on, isn’t it?” Karen asks, standing to take the soup bowls. Tobin hands hers over, “Just under, like, point eight five or so, they said.” “So, a house that old, see any ghosts?” Jamie grins, standing as well to take the roast from the oven. “Nah,” Tobin laughs with a shake of her head, “nothing weird so far.” “Good,” Karen nods, “you never know sometimes.” Tobin nods. She’s not exactly sure she believes in ghosts. Yeah, there was that one time when she was little and her and her sisters were playing in their grandparents’ guest room and the door slammed shut. They ran out yelling and screaming but, looking back, it could have been a draft or something else. She just doesn’t know and hasn’t ever been interested enough to really think about it. Tobin pours another glass for them and herself as they bring over the meal. They opted to do the salad last. Palette cleanser for if they have room for dessert. “This is awesome!” Tobin exclaims as they eat the roast, “I love homecooked meals. Thank you so much for inviting me over.” “Do you like to cook?” Jamie asks, eying her from across the table. Tobin shrugs, “Eh, mostly out of necessity, but maybe I’ll start more, now that I have a nice kitchen.” “Cooking is my stress reliever,” Jamie admits, “after a day with difficult clients or my staff, it’s nice to unwind and get creative.” Tobin nods, “Yeah, that’s cool.” She grins, “You’re a very good cook.” She pauses for a moment, “Sometimes it gets boring just cooking for myself though,” she adds quietly. Both Jamie and Karen nod at her, understanding the feeling. “Well, you’ll just have to invite us over then!” Karen laughs, “Problem solved!” Tobin laughs, grinning at them. She likes them, they’re down to Earth, funny and they don’t treat her any differently just because she has this semi-celebrity status. She’s grateful for that. “Oh, hey,” Tobin says, looking up, “uh, I kind of don’t know who to call for garbage pickup, do you know the name of who gets yours?” “Oh, I’ll get you that,” Karen nods, “anything else?” Tobin shrugs, “I don’t think so,” “Just let us know if you have any other questions,” Jamie smiles at her. “Oh, hey, I know it’s too early to think about it, but what about, like a lawncare company? To cut grass and stuff?” Tobin asks. “My company can do that,” Jamie nods, “we’re very competitive with pricing too. You should think about snow removal unless you enjoy shoveling or have a snowblower.” Tobin opens her eyes wide, “I didn’t even think of that.” After dinner Karen gives Tobin a tour of her studio, she works with metal mostly, incorporating glass and colorful accents into it. Tobin likes it. They send her home with some leftovers, a note with the garbage company info on it and Tobin being added as a client for snow removal and salting. Jamie promises her she got the friends and family discount, reassuring her that her staff is completely professional and won’t damage anything on her property. Especially since she lives next door to the owner. Tobin thanks them profusely, promising dinner soon and they both offer to help in any way they and insist she come to them if anything’s wrong with the house. When Tobin gets home, she smiles as she slides the dish into he fridge, happy she’s connected with them.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
November 16, 2017 Thursday morning finds Tobin happily singing in her car as she drives to the house. Her plans today are to organize the garage, sand the study and buy the paint for her bedroom and the study. When she gets there, she decides to begin sanding and wait for the temperature to warm up a little before going out in the garage. She gets the room prepped, taping the drop cloths to the floor to catch the dust, she covers the one wall of built in shelves and the lower cabinets to prevent as much dust from getting in there as possible, bringing the fan in to crack the window, she gets the sander ready and begins with the ceiling. The work goes smoothly, she has more experience and realizes she doesn’t have to make as many passes with the sander as she’s been doing in the master. The grit of the sandpaper bites through any roughness after only a pass or two, allowing her to work faster with the same results. She smiles under the respirator, if my Dad could see me now, she thinks. Would this be something I’d be interested in doing, she wonders, buying homes, refurbishing them and then selling them. The Portland market is pretty competitive but there has to be more deals out there like the one she got with this place. Something to consider. Life after soccer. She doesn’t like to dwell on it, but she knows her time is coming. She hopes to stay around for the 2020 Olympics, she’d like a shot at some redemption there. That whole thing was a debacle last year, Dawn being a guiding hand in keeping Tobin sane. She wasn’t sure what Jill was thinking, especially when she moved her to play defense. She shakes her head, not willing to think more about it. She has pages in her journal about all of the emotions she felt. It saddened her that as much as she wanted to explore Brazil after they were out, she just wanted to go home. She cried for hours at Perry’s house, unable to stop, so completely exhausted and broken at what happened. Then she slept. It felt like she slept for days, her body exhausted from all the minutes she played, the World Cup, the insanity after it, all the friendlies with the Victory Tour. She loved to be able to play so often, she wasn’t complaining, but she was feeling it in her body. Her ankle was getting worse, the treatments were getting longer, she just wanted a break. She was glad Mark was so understanding that she wanted to wait to report at the deadline even though she was in the city. He knew. He knew she needed time to decompress and process what happened. She couldn’t handle it mentally, getting back and then shifting gears to play for Portland. She was wounded from the Olympic experience, embarrassed, even though she knew she gave everything she had. Tobin doesn’t even realize she’s finished the ceiling until she was changing the sandpaper out and looks up. She was on automatic pilot while she worked. She shrugs to her herself and begins the walls. As she works, she thinks she’ll plaster this room first so she can practice and then do her room. She nods to herself as she gets her gameplan in order. She breaks for lunch, eating while she stands, not wanting to sit and lose her energy. When she returns to the study, the sander won’t go on. She tries it a few times, then looks around the room. It’s plugged in the wall but unplugged from the extension cord. Weird, she thinks, I must have done it without thinking. She’s back at it quickly, finishing the walls before three o-clock. Proud of herself, she happily vacuums the room with the ShopVac and then wipes it down with her Swiffer to finish it. She brings the ShopVac to the garage, emptying it in the same bucket as before, making a note to sign up for her garbage service today. She needs to think where she wants the cable guy to install the jacks as well. How many rooms does she want TV’s in, she wonders. Should she get a jack put outside too for the yard. She’ll ask Jamie about that.She organizes the tools, texting her Dad with a photo, asking what the machine with a saw blade in the middle was. He replies it’s a table saw and sends her a link about its uses. Allie calls her as she’s moving the plaster mix bags across the garage. “YO!” Tobin grins as she answers her FaceTime. “How ya doing Harry?” “Harry!” Allie exclaims, “How are you? Wait, what the Hell is all over you?” she scrunches her face looking Tobin over. “I’m sanding today,” Tobin explains, running her hand over her cheeks and jaw, feeling the grit on her face. “What’s new? How’s the house?” Allie chirps, she sitting on her sofa and Tobin can see the top half of Kass’s head. Tobin sets the phone down, working as she brings Allie’s up to speed with what she’s been doing. Allie gets excited when Tobin tells her about going to dinner to her neighbors, she wants to know all about them. Tobin asks how her and Bati are, what she’s been doing, if she’s been playing futsal or what. They continue talking as Tobin heads back into the house, juggling the extra drop cloths she found and a few more paint rollers. She drops the cloths at the foot of the stairs for the second floor, she’ll take them up the next time she goes up there. She clomps down to the basement, switching on the light. “You’ve been very busy, I see,” Allie comments, “are you eating enough? You look a little skinny.” She knows Tobin sometimes passes on meals when she’s involved in a project. “Yeah,” Tobin replies, coming back upstairs, “I’m eating, I swear I get hungrier doing this than working out, it’s weird.” She grins. “Let me show you the rooms,” she says as she walks into her bedroom. She explains again the wall she wants to be darker, seeing if Allie agrees with her choice. Allie thinks it’s perfect. She walks into the study, panning her phone around to show her the finished walls.“You know,” she says, leaning against the wall, “I’m thinking of maybe painting this room a rich burgundy.” She says. “Keep it kind of classic.” “Well, with that desk, I think it’s perfect, the room is big enough that the dark color wouldn’t make it feel small.” Allies replies, nodding her head in approval. There’s a pause in the conversation as Allie looks at Tobin curiously. “What?” Tobin asks, confused. “So, what’s going on with Alex?” she asks, grinning a little, “You haven’t brought her up yet.” Tobin sighs and shrugs, wrinkling her lips together to give Allie a wry smile. “She confuses me,” she says quietly, “like, we had a really nice time at dinner ya know? We kissed, things were good, then she says she has to leave and go to LA for a few days and has these speaking things when she gets back. I’m like, okay, that’s cool, but then, radio silence.” Allie tilts her head, “What do you mean?” “Like, I don’t hear from her in days, and I send her a few texts that she doesn’t answer, then, boom. She texts to meet tomorrow morning. At the Historical Society for, like, our official meeting on the house.” Tobin take off her hat and runs her fingers though her hair in frustration, oblivious to the dust she was getting in her hair.“I don’t know what to think!” She exclaims. “Does she like me? She seemed like it, but now, she’s like, all business.” She sighs, “I don’t get it.” “Hm,” Allie says, her lower lip out, eyebrows furrowed as she thinks. “That’s weird.” “Ya think?” Tobin says loudly, shaking her head. “Maybe she’s scared? Or really likes you and isn’t sure if she’s, like gay or something?” Allie offers. “I don’t know,” Tobin says quickly, her confusion mounting, “how do I act tomorrow? I mean, she was the one flirting with me!” Allie sighs, “Girls are confusing,” she says sadly, shaking her head, “I’m sorry she’s being this way, I know you really like her.” “Yeah,” Tobin says dejectedly, looking down, pulling at a string on her jeans. “It sucks.” Kass suddenly pops his head up, apparently awake from his nap on Allie’s lap, looking into the phone, tongue out, tail wagging against Allie’s chest. “Hi Kass!” Tobin calls out, happy to see him. He whines at the phone, now seeing Tobin and hearing her voice. He barks softly, stretching it out to sound like he’s answering her. She laughs, she misses the pups. They laugh when Shay comes over, hearing Tobin and nearly sitting on Allie’s head in his excitement. They end their call shortly after that, leaving Tobin smiling at the silliness of the dogs. November 17, 2017 Tobin’s nervous as she opens the door to the Historical Society, her feet feeling heavy as she walks across to the lobby to the stairs to the second floor. She contemplated bringing Alex a coffee and then talked herself out of it and ended up not even getting anything for herself. She takes a deep breath and begins her ascent. When she enters, she sees Alex has her back turned, not seeing her enter. Then she slowly turns, giving Tobin a shy smile. “Good morning,” she says quietly. “Hey,” Tobin greets casually, giving her a small smile, unsure how perky she should be towards her. Alex tilts her head towards the table in front of her counter, “Meet you there?” she asks, as she gathers her folder. Tobin nods and silently takes off her jacket, and sits, pulling her notebook and pen from her.Alex sits, opens her file and begins, “Okay, we last left off with the Harrison’s” “How was your trip?” Tobin interrupts, looking at her with a slight head tilt. “Oh,” Alex reacts, surprised by her asking. “It was fine.” “And the speaking engagements?” Tobin follows up. Alex nods her head, “Those were fine too.” She pauses. “Now in the nineteen ninety-two,” she begins again, she hears Tobin sigh and can see out of the corner of eye that she slouches back in her seat, listening. She’s in the middle of explaining how suddenly the occupant left the house when Tobin surges forward, elbows on the table, leaning across and looking intently at her. “Have I done something wrong?” She asks quietly, confusion and hurt in her eyes. Alex can only shake her head. Tobin tilts hers slightly, “Have I said something to upset you?” She shakes her head again. Tobin lets out a frustrated breath, “You know,” she says, her honey eyes searching Alex, “when two people admit that they like each other, they usually agree to see each other.” Alex bites her lip, her eyes scanning the documents in front of her, unable to meet Tobin’s gaze. “We should just keep this professional.” She says quietly, internally cringing at how cold her voice sounds. She hears Tobin take in a breath, glancing up to see her leaning back quickly, biting her own lip and looking down and slowly nodding.“Now, in nineteen ninety-two,” she begins again, feeling Tobin surge forward to lean towards her again. “What did I do, Alex?” she asks, her face confused and hurt, “If I don’t know, I can’t fix it.” She pleads, looking at her eagerly. “Tobin,” Alex sighs, wanting nothing more than to hug her and kiss her in this exact moment, but paralyzed by her fear of Tobin’s opinion in learning her secret, “We should just” “Keep it professional,” Tobin says sadly, “right, I heard you the first time.” She nods as she bites her lower lip, struggling to keep her emotions in check. Alex watches as Tobin slowly picks up her pen and notebook with a shaking hand, placing them in her backpack, pushing her chair back and standing. She holds her jacket. “Uh, maybe you can just, like, email me updates or something.” She says, her voice trembling with defeat and hurt. “Just, let me know how many more hours you need.” She straightens her back to gather as much dignity she can muster and walks out of the room, Alex hearing her footsteps as she goes down the stairs. Alex races to the window, her hands slamming against the windowsill to stop her forward motion. She sees Tobin walk out, forcefully pulling her jacket on, harshly grabbing her backpack from the ground, wiping tears from her face. She looks back at the building doors, her face a mix of anger and sorrow. Alex feels the tears come as she watches Tobin’s figure retreat to the parking lot. She feels a weight on her shoulders, an embrace hugging her from the side. She turns and sees Erin, a woman who lived on this property years ago and pops in to check on Alex. When Alex says years ago, she means in the late 1800’s. “She really likes you,” Erin murmurs, “why are you pushing her away?” “I’m scared.” Alex replies as she wipes her tears, grateful she doesn’t have any scheduled meetings for the rest of the day. “You deserve a chance at happiness, sweetheart,” the older woman says, “she has a good heart. She might be confused at first, but if she likes you as much as I think she does, she’ll accept it.” Someone clears their throat behind them making them both turn from the window. It’s the long dead Mayor of Portland George Baker. He was a larger than life character, making the city blossom although with a fair share of underhanded tactics. He died in 1941. “I may not have understood homosexuality in my lifetime, my dear,” he says in his grand boisterous voice, “but after decades of serious contemplation in the afterlife, I have come to know, that love is love.” He finishes gently. “And you are worthy of love,” he says, putting his hands in his pockets and rolling from his heels to the tips of his toes, “and that woman who walked out of here, she is something special.” A chorus of ‘Here, here!’ and ‘Yes Mayor’ echoes through the room as all of the other nonliving cheer. Alex scans the room, seeing the faces of these people that have come to be friends, even though they’re dead. “Could you guys just, like, give me some time?” she asks quietly, looking down, wiping her eyes. “You heard her, out!” the Mayor says, spreading his arms and guiding everyone from the room. Alex slowly moves from the window, sitting heavily in her desk chair. She leans forward and puts her head in her hands. All the time she was in LA, she kept trying to stop thinking about Tobin. Wondering what she doing, how she was managing her house renovation. Thinking about how adorably nervous she was at dinner, how she flirted back with her. How she was so down to earth, so normal even though she was a professional athlete, an Olympian even. How they talked so easily with each other. Her laugh. Her smile. Her kiss. She was so conflicted about pursuing a relationship with her. Her last relationship was disastrous, she knows it was one of the reasons she left California. Alex had been so careful, making sure only her very close friends knew her secret. But the one time she opened up after one too many glasses of wine, she felt the relationship shift. Her girlfriend Monica looked at her differently, they began to argue which escalated into shouting match. That’s when Monica revealed she didn’t believe Alex and thought she was some kind of freak who was too interested in the past to pursue a future with her. She was imagining all these people she claimed to see. Then she launched into how Alex was working sixteen hours a day prepping the research for a film and wasn’t able to give her the attention she wanted and, admittedly, deserved. It left Alex wounded, questioning everything about her life. Her parents were understanding and it was her Mom who suggested she look for something else to do as a job. The thought was daunting, but Alex soon found this opportunity and it appealed to her. Once settled in Portland, she licked her wounds and slowly began to feel like herself again. Only one person in Portland knew her secret. Her best friend Sydney moved here two years ago and opened her own business, a unique, truly Portland type of shop, selling crystals, candles, healing oils, funky furniture, some weed and dispensing wisdom in her own way. Syd was an old soul, incredibly sensitive, possibly psychic, and truly caring. Alex raises her head, looking around the empty room. She sighs. She’s got to figure this out. She feels sick to her stomach about how she just treated Tobin. She saw the hurt in her eyes. The confusion. The disappointment. Could she trust her with this important part of her, she wonders. Would she understand just how this is her life. She slowly gets up from the chair, walking over the to the low filing cabinet. Syd will be back in town Sunday night, she’s gone on a buying trip to prep the store for the Black Friday shopping rush. She’ll see her soon and get her head straight. Feeling slightly comforted by knowing Sydney will listen to her, she pulls the file of the Stark family and begins to work. She’ll work on Tobin’s later. She doesn’t have the heart to do that just now. It hurts to think about it. Tobin falls into her bed, awkwardly kicking her shoes off, hugging her pillow and full on sobbing. She didn’t think Alex would turn like that. Become so cold. It hurt. Rejection hurt. It hurt Tobin bad because she likes Alex so much. When she wakes hours later, she lays there, wondering what was wrong with her that made Alex turn like that. She slowly gets out bed and shuffles to her living room. She gets a beer, not feeling hungry and downs half of it before carrying it to her sofa. She sits down, replaying every interaction between her and Alex. Figures, she thinks dejectedly, the first time in a long time I try to put myself out there, I get crushed. She finishes her beer and contemplates getting another and just keep drinking the day away. She shakes her head, resolving to accomplish something today besides getting her heart broken. She goes back to her bedroom, changes into work clothes, determined to get something positive done with herself. The drive to her house is quick. Tobin stands in the living room, contemplating what she should do next. The master and the study are ready to be plastered. She wants to do that when there’s full daylight and not depend on just the work light. What can she do right now to make some progress, she thinks. The hallway on the second floor. She can start scraping the wallpaper and get those walls prepared. She nods to herself. She grabs the water bottle, a scraper and the painter’s tape from the study, scooping up the drop cloths she left on the stairs and begins to prepare the area.She gets the floor taped off and covered quickly, going back downstairs to grab a razor knife to make the cuts around the doors and extend the plastic cloth into the rooms. She thinks she’ll just start at waist level and lug the scaffold up tomorrow once she needs it. She goes back downstairs once more to get the radio, finding a classic rock station to keep her company. She knows almost every song they play, thanks to her parents, but she doesn’t sing along. She’s still too upset about Alex. She works aggressively, scraping the wall, quick, harsh strokes lifting the wallpaper. Soon she’s sweaty and doesn’t understand why she can’t see clearly. She brings her fingers to her face, realizing she’s been crying. She wipes under her nose with her sleeve, aggravated with herself for being so sensitive. Maybe I’m too sensitive, she wonders. She sighs, looking over her work. She finishes one whole side of the hallway when she decides to call it a night. She’s sleepy and her arms are tired. She contemplates staying here but decides she should sleep in her own bed for the night. She locks up the house, shutting off lights and leaving for her apartment. November 18, 2017 Tobin wakes early, unable to sleep well and spends the early morning drinking coffee and reading her Bible. She loves the wisdom she gets from it, curled up on her couch, seeking out passages of comfort. She goes for a run to clear her head and process what’s she’s read and then eats a light breakfast, still not hungry much and drives over to the house. Today is plaster day. Alex is still very much on her mind, but she knows there’s nothing she can do about it. She was very clear with her questions and Alex didn’t refute being attracted to her. It’s on her, she thinks, I just wish it was different. She sighs as she pulls up the list of supplies she’ll need for the plaster job. She finds the hand trowel, it’s fairly large but the grip is good, comfortable in her right hand. The hawk is longer, she knows to use this to put the plaster on instead of going to get it directly from the bucket. Even though she’s lefty, troweling with her right hand is more comfortable. She’s weird like that. She gets the water into a bucket from her laundry sink, another spray bottle at the ready. She reads the bag carefully on the plaster mix so she knows how much water to use. It’s fairly simple, mix to a toothpaste consistency. The floors are still taped off so nothing will damage them, the scaffold in the corner at the ready. She affixes the mixer to the drill and begins to mix. She decides to try to keep it as smooth as possible and not have it have any texture or overlapping trowel marks. That’s how she wants it in her bedroom, so this is the practice run. She figures the dark burgundy paint will hide the imperfections as well. She places the heavy bucket of plaster on the scaffold, gets herself up there and loads up the hawk. It’s go time. She quickly gets used to moving the trowel, gliding it over ceiling, the plaster gripping to the glued surface. As she starts in the corner, she fans out her pattern, always covering the newly laid plaster with another thin coat to spread it across the ceiling. She gets about a quarter of the ceiling competed when she runs out of plaster. Glad for the rest, she gets down, lifting another bag to dump in the bucket, going to the laundry room to fetch more water and begin mixing up another batch. She wants to do this all in one shot, not letting the plaster dry and set up before she finishes. It’s the ceiling so there’s no good place to stop. The walls, she can stop at the corners. That’s no problem. This one, the ceiling needs to be done all in one go. There’s no overhead light fixture or wires hanging down to deal with. It makes her wonder about how she’ll light this room. She kept on the classic rock station, the music passing the time, allowing her to enjoy this. There’s a rhythm to plastering, plaster to hawk, trowel to hawk, trowel to ceiling, she likes it. She likes the sense of accomplishment as she moves the scaffold across the room to advance her work. When it’s finished, she sits wearily on the scaffold, looking up at the still setting plaster. It looks good. She gets up and holds the powerful light up, inspecting her work and making sure there are no ridges to cast shadows. It’s smooth. Satisfied, she sets the light down and heads out to the kitchen for a late lunch. She heads back to the study feeling confident in her plastering skills and ready to begin the walls. She completes two walls and is getting down from the scaffold when she feels her phone vibrate. It’s her Dad. She accepts the FaceTime call. “Hey Pop!” Tobin grins. “Peanut! How’s it going?” he asks, smiling at her. Tobin spends the next half hour half showing him her progress and asks him questions about removing the doors to the master and study and if she should strip them like the trim. He explains how to do it and offers suggestions for how to remove the doorknobs. “So, you just use a mild soap to clean off the doorknobs and make sure you dry them well,” he finishes. Tobin still isn’t convinced she can do it, so her Dad insists on her getting a flat head screwdriver and a hammer and he’ll walk her through it. She sets her phone on a bucket with a lid as she listens to how to get the doorknob assembly off, then tentatively trying it herself. It’s easier than she thought. Then she balances her phone on the scaffold as she follows his instructions on getting the hinge off. She has to use some muscle to coax the hinge out but eventually gets it. “Thanks so much Dad,” she says as she leans the door against the hallway wall, coming back into his view, “I was nervous about this part.” “Aw, you don’t give yourself enough credit, Peanut,” he says, smiling broadly at her, “you’re doing a terrific job. I’m just sorry I won’t be able to get back up there until you get back from LA.” “It’s okay, Dad, I understand.” Tobin smiles at him, happy they’ve been getting closer. “You’re only a FaceTime away and you’ve been such a big help.” They talk for a few minutes longer and then end the call. She’s smiling as she heads back to the study, eager to finish the room. When she finishes the walls, she cleans her tools, gives the room one last look and then takes the worklight upstairs to the first guest room. She figures to give her arms a break from the plastering. They’re sore. She should go to the hot tub again tonight, that helps her shoulders and arms, she thinks. She sets up the sawhorses preparing two stations for the doors for tomorrow. She brings up the sander and extra sheets, making sure she has the smoother ones. She’s ready for tomorrow. November 19, 2017 Tobin’s gets an early start to her day, wanting to prep the doors and then at least get the ceiling done in the master bedroom. She gets both doors stripped on one side before noon, letting them set and dry out before she starts on the other side and is starting the ceiling after lunch. It goes well, Tobin getting a good feel of the plaster, spreading it with wide sweeping strokes, crossing over and moving it methodically across the surface. She finishes it sooner than she thought she would, just in time for dinner. She opts run out for some food, driving over to one of her favorite Chinese places, getting an order of stir fry chicken to go. She brings it back, making her plate, grabbing a beer and settling herself at the kitchen table to eat. She’s looking around the living room, imagining where her furniture should go. She really only has a couch and coffee table, her apartment isn’t that large. She has a really cool shelving unit, it’s only three shelves high made from reclaimed wood with steel uprights to hold the shelves.She slowly realizes that as much as she likes the unit, it doesn’t really flow with the interior. She wants to finish her bedroom tomorrow, but maybe on Tuesday she’ll go shopping for furniture. She knows it will take a few weeks for it to come in, so she should get that started. She knows she wants her TV mounted above the fireplace, but she doesn’t want it to be the focal point of the room. Maybe she could make a cool wood box to hold it in and have doors that slide open and close so when she entertains, she doesn’t have it open. Maybe she could do some cool wood pattern on the doors. She shrugs to herself, if I can’t do it, then I’ll hire someone. But I want to try. She grabs her house list and scribbles it down on her list of projects. It’s been hours since she did the first side of the doors, so she heads upstairs and begins to strip the other side. She didn’t bring the radio up, it’s still downstairs in her room, so she just works quietly. Ashlyn Harris surprises her with a phone call, asking how everything is going, having questions on some of the photos Tobin had texted her. “So, Kling tells me you guys found a bunch of Tiffany lamps?” she asks incredulously. “Well, they’re marked it, but I don’t know if they’re real or not,” Tobin replies as she scrapes the door, “I need to take them somewhere to get checked out and make sure they’re safe to use.” “What the hell is that noise?” Ash asks. “I’m stripping a door,” Tobin explains. “Okay, I’m calling you back on FaceTime, you gotta show me this place.” Ash says and hangs up. Tobin rings and she smiles as she answers. “Yo, man,” “Hey, bud.” Ash grins, “Ali’s here, too.” She says, swinging the phone out further. Ali’s face appears, “Hi Tobin!” “Hey Ali!” Tobin smiles, “How are you?”“Doing good, enjoying the sun!” She smiles, she’s in LA at camp with Ash. Well, she’s visiting, since Jill didn’t call her in. They don’t talk about it. It’s a touchy situation. “Why don’t you come down and we catch some waves?” Ash asks, “Kelley would love too as well.” “Ah man, I can’t right now,” Tobin says, “I’ve got so much to do.” “I guess so, if you’re stripping a door at nine o’clock on a Sunday.” Ash says wryly. “Hey, you were the one who said a house is a lot of work, dude!” Tobin laughs, “Let me give you guys the tour.” She flips her phone to show them the room, “This is the first guest room on the second floor.” She explains, “It’s also my official door prep area.” “Do you have to strip the wallpaper off?” Ali asks, squinting as she looks. “Yeah, if I can get it done before Christmas it would be great, but I’m not rushing.” Tobin says, walking into the hallway. “Uh, there’s three more rooms up here and two baths, but there aren’t any overhead lights so I can’t show it you.” “What about the attic?” Ash asks. “No lights up there either, but it runs the length of the house.” Tobin replies. She walks down the stairs, aiming the phone so they can see the large living room and kitchen. “Holy shit Tobin!” Ashlyn exclaims, “It’s fucking huge!” “That kitchen!” Ali gushes, “Are you going to start cooking now?” she jokes. “I just might,” Tobin grins, panning the living room. “Some of this is Allie and Bati’s stuff, I don’t really have anything here yet.” “What’s that?” Ali points towards where the bedframe is lying against the wall. “Oh, I found this upstairs,” Tobin explains, walking over to show them. “It was like that?” Ash asks, shaking her head. “Nah, I had to clean it up and polish it.” Tobin replies, “Ooh, I can show you the desk too,” she pans over to show them it and the chair. Then the side tables and the narrow table. “Wow!” Ash says with a whistle, “All my attic had in it were a few dead lizards.” “Yeah, well, I got lucky.” Tobin says, walking to the study, she flicks on the work light. “So, this is the study,” she says, panning the phone around. “A study!” Ash exclaims, “You hardly studied in college! The fuck you gonna do with one now?” she laughs as Ali slaps her shoulder. “Ash!” Tobin laughs, “Probably pay the bills for this place.” She’s grinning even though they can’t see her. She explains what’s happening in this room. “You’re plastering the walls?” Ali asks, clearly impressed. “Yeah, it’s actually pretty cool to do.” She shows them the tools and explains basically how to do it.“Dude!” Ash exclaims, “I need you to come down and fix some stuff for me, you’re like Ms. HGTV now.” “Hardly,” she says, turning off the light, unplugging it and taking it with her to the master. She lights up the room. “This is the master.” She pans her phone around and then walks to the bathroom and closet. “Tobin, this place is amazing, I’m so happy for you.” Ali says sincerely“Thanks,” she says, shutting the lights off and walking back to the kitchen, switching her view, “sometimes I have to pinch myself that this is mine.” “I know,” Ashlyn agrees, “it’s a good feeling, huh?” “Yeah,” Tobin smiles broadly, “it is.” They chat for another half hour about what Ali has going on and what their holiday and offseason plans are. She feels good after the call, reminding herself she needs to make more of an effort to reach out to her friends more. She needs to make sure she gives herself time to work it in her day. With that, she feels it’s too late to work on the doors anymore, so she checks that the back door is locked and gets ready to leave. She can’t find her keys. She stands in the kitchen, thinking. Where did I put them, she pats her pockets, looks in her backpack, her head swiveling around the room. Where are they, she wonders, walking slowly back to the master to look in there, she checks the bathroom. Nothing. Perplexed, she walks back to the kitchen, preparing to completely empty her pack. She lifts it and finds her keys underneath. Sighing in frustration, she grabs them and heads out.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
November 21, 2017 It’s Tuesday and Tobin is wandering around downtown Portland in a trendy area with all sorts of cool shops. Yesterday she finished stripping the doors and plastering the master bedroom. She feels good with her progress to date, but had a mini panic attack thinking about what if she couldn’t get everything completed in time. So, she sat down with her lists of projects and the dates she needs them completed by. She realizes now, she has some time to get them completed. If she really pushes herself, she just might get the entire house completed before her surgery. She spent the late afternoon making calls for a chimney sweep, garbage service, scheduling the moving company and the cable company, setting up the appointment for the installation of her cable service. She decided to switch out her days and let the plaster really dry before painting and go furniture shopping today instead. She sees a display of eclectic items in a store window and feels compelled to enter. A bells tinkles from her opening the door and she enters slowly, overwhelmed by the crowded shelves, and passageways. She eyes the display of intricately carved wooden figurines, then moves over to check out a shelf of candles. This place is cool, she thinks to herself as she moves deeper into the store. “Hello,” a voice says softly. An attractive woman with caramel skin and black hair says, eying Tobin curiously. “Hi,” Tobin replies, giving her a smile. “This place is so interesting.” “Thank you,” she smiles in return, “are you looking for anything in particular?” Tobin shrugs, “Kinda,” she says looking around, “I just moved so I need some furniture and other stuff.” The woman nods, placing the incredibly phallic looking candle she was holding down on the display table, “I have some furniture in the other room.” She trails a hand and gestures for Tobin to follow. Tobin eyes the shelves of exotic pipes and the different cans of weed. Another unit holds crystals and incense. A short hallway opens into a much larger room, not nearly as suffocating with the knick knacks in the front. An array of chairs, sofas, tables and more litter the area. “I’m Sydney,” she says, extending a hand, Tobin shakes it. “Tobin. Nice to meet you.” She nods, “Most of these are period pieces, they’ve been refinished and reupholstered. The new ones are available in a variety of colors which are listed on the tag with the color swatches. If you have any questions, just find me, okay?” she gives her a soft smile. “Yeah, I will, thanks” Tobin says, taking a step to the left and viewing the sofas. She’s instantly drawn to a long angular dark brown sofa with straight lines and deep cushions. She sits on it, bouncing a little. She looks around the room, shrugs and lays down, stretching down across it, leaving her shows hanging off the edge. It’s surprisingly comfortable, she rolls on her side. It’s nice and wide, easy to snuggle on. She just needs a pillow and she’d be set. She gets up, nodding approvingly, looking around to see if there’s something else that matches it. She doesn’t find a loveseat, but she sees a side chair. It’s angular in the same style that appeals to her. She sits in it, resting her arms on the sides, leaning her head back. It’s incredibly comfy as well. She looks at the tag, it’s the same maker as the couch she likes. She thinks she’d prefer fabric over leather in most of the house, seeing as the house is so old. She remembers the big easy chair she found in the attic, maybe she could get it reupholstered in the same fabric. That’d be cool. Her living room is large enough to hold at least the three chairs and the sofa without looking crowded at all. She likes the vibe of this place, it’s laid back, the prices seem reasonable, she likes that Sydney left her to do her own thing and not hover over her. She continues looking at the tables and chairs. She could use a new kitchen one, maybe something with similar lines of the couch and chair she likes. Hers is super dark and round and she thinks a medium tone and something square or rectangular would work better in the kitchen seeing how the wood is lighter. Besides, her kitchen chairs have round backs and that wouldn’t go. She nods her head, going further back to look over the larger tables.She doesn’t want everything to match perfectly but to have some lines or the color be able to let it flow. She sees a long table that’s a shade darker than medium, with wide planks of reclaimed wood side by side anchored with black metal bands near each end. It’s very original and she likes it. Really likes it. It’s only seven hundred dollars and that seems very reasonable to Tobin with how unique it looks.She turns around and thinks she should get Sydney so they can review all of this. She pokes her head out from the hallway, “Uh, Sydney?” she calls out.“Yes?” Sydney poking her head out from right around the corner, startling her. Tobin flinches back. “Sorry,” Sydney says shrugging, “I was right over here.” She points to a table with boxes stacked on it. “That’s okay,” Tobin breathes out, “You just, uh, surprised me.” Sydney looks at her with raised eyebrows. “Something catch your eye?” she inquires. Tobin nods. “Yeah and I have some questions.” Tobin says, turning to go back and lead her to the sofa. “I like this in this exact color,” she points and then strides over to the chair, “and I like this chair but in the same color and fabric as the sofa, and I’d need two of them.” Sydney takes out her phone, scanning the hanging tag on the couch and then the chair and making notes. She nods. “Also, I have an old chair I found in my place,” Tobin says, “do you guys do upholstering?” Sydney nods, “I can have it done,” she says, “in the same fabric and color?” Tobin nods. “Once I see it I can get you a quote on it.” She replies. “Okay, that would be awesome!” Tobin smiles, “Uh, do you think when they deliver the stuff they can take back here?” “Sure, no problem,” Sydney agrees, returning the smile. “Now, I saw a table I really like, but I’m not sure about the chairs.” Tobin says, leading her over the dark table. “My living room flows into an open kitchen so I think the chairs should have straight lines to mimic the couch, kinda.” She says, scratching the back of her neck and shrugging, unsure of herself. “What do you think?” Sydney, purses her lips, eyes scanning the room, then focusing on the chairs. She nods. “I like your sense of style.” She says, “Not everyone would think about the subliminal message of how the lines of the house should flow.” “Come on,” She says, leading Tobin over to a cluster of mismatched wood chairs. “Your table is custom made locally,” she explains, “but they haven’t made any exact matching type of chairs for them. People can be so picky.”“Oh, cool.” Tobin says, smiling again, “I like that it’s made here, that’s pretty sweet.” Sydney smiles at her, “Check these out and see if any styles speak to you.” She takes a step back, “I have a few others in back I’ll bring out.” “Oh, you don’t” Tobin starts. “I do,” Sydney says, giving her a sly wink, “besides I think there’s one back there that is perfect.” Tobin eyes the chairs in front of her. She eliminates the round back ones and picks up the straight ones and lines them up in a row. She finds three she thinks might work and carries them over to the table and see if they go with it. It’s easy for her to imagine the chairs being the same color as the table, so that doesn’t distract her. She’s never been a big fan of her kitchen set, actually, Allie insisted Tobin buy it, stating that it would be perfect and Tobin couldn’t make a decision. There’s nothing wrong with it, except that Tobin doesn’t like the feel of it. If she can get it down to the basement, she’ll keep it and offer to Allie when she needs her stuff, Tobin nods, thinking that’s a good plan. She’s standing there eying the chairs, when Sydney returns, triumphantly carrying two more. She side steps down the row and sets the chairs by the table. “Those are kind of cool.” Tobin murmurs. She sits in the second one. It’s pretty comfortable. She likes the lines on it. She gets up and looks it over. The chair is only fifty bucks, which she thinks is a good deal. “How many chairs do you think would work around the table?” she questions Sydney. “Ten comfortably,” she answers, putting the five chairs against the table. She shuffles them and has four on one side and one at the head with plenty of room between each seat. “You could probably get twelve in there, but I think it would get a little tight. You could do less or whatever you want.” “Wow,” Tobin says, nodding, this is so cool, she thinks. She likes how Sydney isn’t pushy at all, like most typical salespeople.“Is there a chair here that works for you?” Sydney asks, pulling the chairs out again for Tobin to look over. She eyes one chair in particular. “Uh, you said this table is made here, right?” she asks and sees Sydney nod. “So, would the same company be doing the chairs?” “Oh yeah, they would do it, no problem.” She replies. “I like this chair a lot, but something’s missing.” She says, looking it over. It has a straight back that’s about three quarters of an inch wide and comes just over Tobin’s shoulders when she sits on it. She gets up and looks at it again and an idea pops in her head. “Do you think they could put a black metal band along here?” she asks, fingering the edge and side of the chair. She figures if a band was placed on the back, it might make the chair uncomfortable. “Like, mimic the table a little? It might just, like, tie it in better.” She explains quietly. “Oh, girl, I like it!” Sydney exclaims. “I should have thought of that, that’s a great idea.” “Could they do it?” she asks her. “Absolutely,” she nods, “and I’ll tell them to give you a discount because they should totally offer it with their chairs from now on!” “Cool!” Tobin grins, she likes her enthusiasm and a chance at a discount. “So, you’d like them?” Sydney asks her. “Yeah, let’s go with all ten, back band on the edge same as the table but to scale.” Tobin confirms. Sydney scans the chair and writes in her notes. “I’ll give you a quote on the them adding the band, okay?” she asks. “Yeah,” Tobin agrees, “no problem.” “Anything else?” she asks. “Uh,” Tobin thinks, “do you have any big, like, classic dark brown leather chairs for an office or library? Kinda like the ones you see in the movies?” Sydney tilts her head, “This way.” They go down the hall and turn left into another larger room. This one contains a variety of chaise lounge chairs, dressing tables, vanities and all sorts of other items. “I think the kind of chairs you’re looking are over there,” Sydney points to the far back of the room, “I have some that came from a law office.” “Oh, cool,” Tobin says as she make her way over there. A slim side table catches her eye, it would be cool between the two side chairs in the living room. It’s only thirty dollars and Tobin thinks she could just strip it herself and stain it to match the other tables from the attic.Then she runs into a section of ottomans, spread out side by side. “Uh, Sydney?” she asks, turning to see her looking at her phone. Sydney looks up at her. “Uh, these ottomans,” she says as Sydney approaches, “could one of these, like this one,” she points, “could I get this in the same fabric as the side chairs?” Sydney checks the tag and nods, “Absolutely, we can do it.” “Great, let’s get that one then,” she says, pointing to the one she likes and then moving to look at the leather chairs. She finds one quickly, testing it out, relaxing for a minute. She smiles at Sydney, “Everyone told me furniture shopping was going to be a drag, but this has been cool.” “Well, you’re sure more decisive about what you like and make decisions quickly than what I usually see,” Sydney replies with a smile, “would you like a coffee, or tea or some water?” she asks, sensing she might here a bit longer. Tobin stands up, “A tea would be wonderful, thanks,” she says, smiling, “if it’s no trouble.”“Cream? Sugar?” she asks, looking at her expectantly. “Just plain is fine, thanks.” Tobin smiles. Sydney waves her hand at her, “I’m going to have one as well,” she says as she leaves the room, “so it’s no trouble at all.” She calls out from the hallway. Tobin sees there’s a matching ottoman for the leather chair. She definitely can picture herself reading in the chair on a rainy afternoon, feet up, sipping tea. She needs a small side table and some lamps. She definitely wants the Tiffany lamps in the living room, the floor lamp would be awesome in the study. She needs a lamp for the desk and that would be enough light for now. For her bedroom, she’d like something a little more modern, maybe a dark brass, not shiny, but older looking. She wanders around, finding the table, a super cool modern looking desk lamp that has an Art Deco feel to it, and a colorful fire screen she thinks would be perfect in front of her fireplace. It’s made of black metal with an interesting wire pattern featuring geometric glass inserts that she feels would project the light pretty cool. She finds a very unique angular upright wine rack made that’s metal and has a black finish. It stands almost four feet tall and has a rack to hang glasses. Sydney enters the room carrying two mugs and hands one over to Tobin.“Thanks,” Tobin says, holding the mug with both hands for a moment and then bringing it to her mouth and blowing on the liquid gently. “Anything work for you?” Sydney questions, raising her eyebrows. “Uh, yeah,” Tobin laughs, “I found a few things.” She tilts her head, “Ready?” She leads Sydney around the room, pointing out the various items she would like. Sydney enters it all in her phone, nodding as she works. When she gets to the fireplace screen, Sydney squeals, “Oh, I just love that!” “Really?” Tobin grins, feeling good about her choice. “Yes! That’s also made by a local artist here.” She nods.“Sweet!” Tobin says happily, she feels special knowing that someone took the time to design and create the piece and maybe there isn’t another one like it. “Are you an interior designer?” Sydney questions, raising an eyebrow. “Me?” Tobin points to herself, “Nah,” she shakes her head, “I’m a just soccer player.” She says. “A soccer player with an excellent eye,” Sydney compliments. Tobin gives her a smile, “Thank you,” she says sincerely, “it’s pretty easy though, when you’re surrounded by a fantastic selection.” “Oh, you’re a smooth talker,” Sydney laughs, leading Tobin to her counter so she can write up the order. “I’m being serious,” Tobin says, nodding at her, “this place is just absolutely perfect.” “Thank you,” Sydney blushes with the compliment. She gestures to Tobin to sit across from her on a high stool while she prints out her order. She takes down Tobin’s address and Tobin hands over her credit card to place a deposit. Sydney insisted it was fine, telling her she could pay the balance after she confirmed the quoted prices on the chairs and upholstery work. “Did you want to take any of the items with you today?” She asks. “Would it be alright to just have them all delivered at once?” Tobin asks, knowing she didn’t really want it all cluttering up her living room until she completely finished the two rooms. Sydney nods. “Would the week of December 10th work for you on delivery?” Sydney asks as she eyes her calendar. “That would be perfect.” Tobin smiles, “I’ll be officially moving in just before then, so it would be great.” “Wonderful!” Sydney beams. “Oh, hey,” Tobin raises her index finger, “do you like check out lamps and stuff?” Tobin asks. “One of my friends said there was a place around here that did.” “I do,” she nods. “Do you like, authenticate stuff too?” Tobin asks. Sydney tilts her head questioningly.“I found some stuff in my new attic,” Tobin explains, she shrugs, “there’s some lamps that might be Tiffany.” She finishes quietly. Sydney’s mouth forms an ‘o’ and her eyebrows shoot high, “Girl!” she exclaims, drawing out the word, “You have got to let me see them!” Tobin laughs, nodding at her, “Okay, I’ll bring them in. But you can check that they’re safe to use and stuff?” “Don’t touch them, don’t clean them, just pack them back up!” Sydney orders. “Oh, but I polished them so they’d be bright and shiny again,” Tobin says innocently, just to see her reaction. Sydney inhales sharply, fanning herself and then laying her hand on her chest, “NO!” she screeches. Tobin can’t help but laugh. “I’m kidding,” she says, giggling a little, “I just wanted to see how’d you react.” Sydney narrows her eyes at Tobin, “Girl, don’t do that to Mama Sydney, she gon get basic wich you.” She says pointing sternly at her. Tobin puts her hands up in surrender, “I’m sorry,” she says sincerely but there’s a little smirk playing at her lips, “I was just messing.” Sydney lets out a laugh, “That was a good one,” she says, laughing now. “You got me.” “I can’t thank you enough for all of help today,” Tobin says sincerely, “you’ve made this so easy for me, I really do appreciate it.” “It’s been my pleasure, really, Tobin,” she smiles warmly at her, “I’ll call you next week with the quotes and then again to set up the actual delivery date.” “I’ll talk to you then,” Tobin says, extending her hand, “nice doing business with you.” “Thank you very much,” Sydney says warmly, smiling at her. “I’ll be back once I’ve got everything in place.” She says sincerely, “This is just the main floor and I don’t want to get overwhelmed thinking about the rest.” She explains.“That’s pretty smart,” Sydney smiles, “Don’t stress out over it.” “Exactly.” Tobin smiles, taking a step towards the door. “I’ll be back.” “See you then,” she smiles. Tobin makes her way out of the store, whistling a happy tune. “You got all of that in one place?” Allie’s voice climbing octaves as she speaks. “Yep.” Tobin nods, smiling broadly, proud of herself. She FaceTime Allie wanting to share her excitement. “And you’re getting it in three weeks?” “Uh huh.” Tobin nods quickly, excited. “How much did it set you back?” Allie tilts her head. She wants to make sure Tobin didn’t get ripped off. Normally furniture takes four to six weeks to get delivered. Sometimes she feels Tobin’s too nice to people and gets taken advantage of. Tobin’s busy rolling her eyes at Allie’s question. “Please tell me it was under twenty-five thousand.” Allie says seriously as she narrows her eyes at Tobin. Tobin just smirks at her. “Harry!” she shouts. “Just under ten.” Tobin replies. Allie crinkles her forehead, mouth dropping open. “How so cheap?” “Well,” Tobin shrugs, “some of it is refurbished, and” Allie slaps her forehead. “Tobin, you did not buy used furniture for your house. Tell. Me. You. Didn’t.” she stresses each word. “No, it’s not like that,” Tobin explains, “some of them are, like, antiques, and” “Antiques? From Miss Modern?” Allie shrieks, “I knew you shouldn’t have gone alone, now you’re gonna get fucking scabies or something from a ratty ass sofa and have to disinfect your fucking old house!” Old house, Tobin thinks as her patience is beginning to wear thin at this point. She doesn’t like my house. What started out as her calling Allie, her best friend, with some exciting news has quickly turned into her being defensive about her purchases. “Al, listen,” she says quietly, taking a deep breath and trying again, “this place is super cool, they reupholster”“The Salvation Army ‘reupholsters’, Tobin!” Allie exclaims angrily, now for sure knowing Tobin got taken advantage of. Tobin can hear Bati yell something in the background. She just stares at her for a moment, “You know,” Tobin says, her voice tinged with anger, “I gotta go, talk to you later.” She ends the FaceTime call, shuts her phone off and angrily flicks it on the passenger seat of her car. She didn’t want to get super angry and say something stupid. She was still parked by the store, so excited to share her news and all she wanted to do was share it with Allie. “Aaaarrrrgh!” she exclaims, slapping both of her hands on her steering wheel and gripping it tightly. She leans her forehead against the wheel as she still grips it, letting out a deep sigh. She sits back in her seat, chewing on her bottom lip, then starts her car, driving back to her apartment to get some packing done. She leaves her phone off for the rest of the night, angry with Allie, upset about Alex and just being crabby in general. She retrieves the box for her TV from her storage unit in her building, glad she had the sense to keep it. At least I can do one thing right, she thinks to herself as she lugs the oversized box to the elevator. Once back in her place, she leans it up against the living room wall. She packs most of her kitchen, carefully marking the boxes so that some of the items would go directly to the pantry and not clutter up the kitchen area. It’s almost one-thirty in the morning when she finishes, not realizing how the time flew, or that she’d forgotten to eat dinner. Exhausted, she strips off her clothes, quickly changing into shorts and a t-shirt and settles under the covers. She’s tired, upset and her mind won’t turn off. She tosses and turns, trying to get comfortable, almost giving up and getting out of bed to go back and pack something else, when she finally drifts off into an uneasy sleep. November 22, 2017 After a lousy night’s sleep, she drags herself to the house determined to paint the study today. She brings in a sealed new empty bucket from the garage, intent on pouring almost all of the full gallon of paint in it and use the screen to roll out the room. She trims out the room first, carefully painting along the ceiling, making sure to make it wide enough so the roller won’t get too close to the ceiling. She does the corners and along the floor. It’s nice to paint this way, without having to worry about taping off trim and being extra careful. It makes it go pretty quick. She realizes she hasn’t turned on the radio, instead replaying her conversation with Allie in her mind. Going back and thinking of how Allie acted whenever she was at the house. She doesn’t like it, Tobin realizes. She shakes her head, then Alex pops up in her mind, upsetting her even more, and feeling like she just can’t win for trying. She turned her phone on this morning to see fourteen missed calls from Allie, six voice mails from her and texts messages. She hasn’t listened to the messages or looked at any of the texts yet, still upset from their exchange. There’s nothing from Alex. She reaches over and turns on the radio, preparing to pour the rich burgundy paint in the bucket. If she can just get the stupid lid off. She’s bent over it, one hand holding the thin handle, the other gripping the edge with her fingertips as she tries to get the lid off. She moves her fingers around the edge, pulling as hard as she can, trying to loosen it when her grip fails, sending her right hand back into her face, effectively punching herself in the eye so hard, she staggers back a few paces. “Fuuuuuck!” she curses, bringing both hands to her eye, feeling the pain and both of her eyes watering. She’s a little dizzy from the impact, backing up so she’s sitting on the edge of the windowsill. She’s full on crying now, in pain from a stupid accident, upset from Allie and Alex, being overly tired and just feeling low. She drops the stupid bucket, kicking it across the floor, moving her hands to cover both her eyes as she weeps, sliding slowly off the windowsill to lean against the wall with her knees drawn up, elbows resting on them, holding her head in her hands, leaning forward. When Alex parks her car in front of Tobin’s house, all of the courage she had leaves her. She’s suddenly sure this is a terrible mistake and there’s no way Tobin will even talk to her, much less agree to date her. She probably won’t even let her through the gate. She looks up at the building, the steep roof line, the turret peaking out in back, the window shutters. It’s impressive.She takes a deep breath, remembering Sydney’s words of wisdom from last night and unbuckles her seatbelt. She grabs her backpack and the tube holding the blueprints, opens her door and exits. She strides to the gate, firmly pressing the button, eying the video camera looking at her. She takes another deep breath and waits for Tobin to answer. When she got to Syd’s house last night, Alex was near full panic mode. She quickly runs down how she met someone, withholding Tobin’s name so Syd wouldn’t judge just by her celebrity status. Syd wasn’t shallow like that, but Alex wanted her honest opinion before telling her who this amazing woman is. “So, what’s the problem?” Syd asks, as she slides the chicken into the oven, turning to face her. “This is someone you like. Sounds like you like her a lot. Go for it.” “Well, what if she doesn’t understand and I get crushed?” Alex asks quietly. Syd laughs, “You move on.” She stands next to her and gives her a hug, “Alex, from how you explained this woman, she sounds pretty awesome. She also sounds like she would be understanding. Get to know her, date her, Hell, jump her bones and then figure out if you think you can take it to that next level.” “But I” Alex starts.“You can have some fun you know, without getting serious too quick. Feel her out, feel her up, just go with it and when you know, you’ll know.” Syd says assuredly. She pours them both a glass of wine. “You’re right,” Alex admits, “I shouldn’t let this fear hold me back from just spending time with her.” “Right!” Syd agrees, “you don’t have to bring it up on your first date or anything.” Alex nods, “Okay, I’m going to do it. I’m going over to her house tomorrow, grovel, plead, beg, basically anything for her to understand I’m sorry for how I’ve treated her and ask her to give me a chance.”“That’s the spirit!” Syd smiles, “It will all work out.” As they eat, Syd tells her about her day, “Guess who came in to my store yesterday and bought the place out.” She grins wickedly. “Clues.” Alex says as she chews. “Hot, female, soccer player.” Syd says, wiggling her eyebrows. Alex slowly lowers her fork, “Uh, Thorns?” Syd nods knowingly. “Offense or defense?” “Offense.” Alex drops her fork, “National Team too?” she asks weakly. Syd nods, now looking concerned. Alex drops her head in her hands, “Tobin Heath?” she mutters not looking at her. “Bingo!” Syd proclaims. “She was super sweet, very polite, knew what she wanted, practically bought a quarter of the store.” Alex just looks at her, shaking her head. “What?” Syd tilts her head, raising her eyebrows at her. “That’s who I’m talking about.” Alex says quietly, closing her eyes, waiting for Syd’s reaction. “Girl!” she shrieks, “You have got to hit that! Just for the sake of saying you did!” Alex continues to shake her head. “She’s, like every lesbian’s wet dream!” Syd continues, “And some straight girls!” “Syd,” Alex says, drawing out her name, “come on.” “You’re right, you’re right,” she says quickly as she nods, “she was super cool. Very humble. Down to earth. Like, totally laid back, but kinda shy, not afraid to say she didn’t know if something went together, you know?” Syd takes a deep breath and collects herself, hands in front of her, fingers spread on the table as she calms herself. “She has a wonderful aura, like an unusual orange, such a good heart.” She pauses to smile at Alex.“Alex, she’d be good for you, honey.” She says sincerely. “You think so?” Alex asks looking expectantly at her. “I know so,” Syd says authoritatively, “she’s good people.” Alex hears a buzz and click and the gate pops open a little. She pushes it open more and closes it gently behind her. She slowly walks up the sidewalk to the front door, taking the stairs slowly, beginning to feel even more nervous. The door opens slowly as she reaches the porch. Tobin looking out at her. She looks like a mess, her hair half out of her ponytail, face red, cheeks glistening and her eyes red rimmed from what appears to be tears. Alex notes the dark circles under her eyes and how her right eye is twitching as if she’s struggling to keep it open. “Hi,” Alex says quietly. Tobin looks at her, “Is this a professional visit?” she inquires, her voice harsh but nasally, the hurt and underlying anger coming through loud and clear.“Uh” Alex starts. “I’m sorry,” Tobin sighs, leaning against the door frame. “That was mean. You didn’t deserve that.” She straightens up, opening the door and gesturing her to follow. She keeps walking, right to the kitchen, looking in the freezer and then opening cabinet drawers. She stops and turns and grabs a bottle of Tylenol from her backpack on the island counter, pulling out three pills, popping them in her mouth and taking a long drink from her water bottle. Alex observes this, noting that Tobin’s right eye was rapidly swelling. Tobin goes back to opening and closing drawers and cabinets, shutting them hard, obviously frustrated while looking for something.“Um, what are you looking for?” Alex asks quietly, she’s unsure of herself, unsure of Tobin. She’s never seen her this upset and so angry. “Bags for an ice pack.” Is the clipped reply as she continues slamming drawers shut in frustration. Alex quietly reaches into her backpack, removing two quart sized plastic bags she keeps in there for large paper clips and rubber bands. She quickly empties them into her pack. “Here,” she offers, setting them towards the middle of the island. “Thanks,” Tobin says quietly, grabbing them quickly, putting one inside the other, filling it with ice and adding some water. She seals both of them shut and grabs a dish towel, wraps the ice pack inside it, walks to the couch and slumps down on it in the far corner, slouching back, turning her head and placing the ice bag on eye.Alex waits a full minute before moving. She walks over to the couch, sitting down slowly and tentatively a cushion away from her. She can feel the frustration and anger and sadness flowing so strongly from Tobin it unsettles her. “What happened to your eye?” Alex questions quietly. “Something stupid,” Tobin replies just as quietly. Her face is turned towards her, but her eyes are closed. “What did you do?” Alex persists, beginning to wonder of Tobin might have a concussion. Tobin lets out a deep sigh, “I punched myself.” She says flatly as she opens her left eye to look at Alex. “How?” Alex questions, struggling to maintain a straight face, it’s kind of hilarious to hear that. “Opening a bucket,” Tobin replies, extending her hands and mimicking how she punched herself. “Oh,” Alex says, raising her eyebrows and desperately hoping the smirk she feels on her face isn’t as noticeable as she thinks it is. Tobin eyes her and nods, “You can laugh, it’s kinda funny,” she says, letting out a quiet, tired chuckle. Alex does laugh, a short, abbreviated burst that she pushes down, not wanting to make Tobin feel even worse. They eye each other silently for a few minutes, neither saying anything. Alex leans back on the couch, laying her head back in the same manner as Tobin, turning to face her. “I’m sorry.” She says sincerely. “Me too,” Tobin replies quietly and Alex can hear the sorrow in her voice. “I got scared.” Alex admits, “Getting to know you just this little bit, excites me and makes me want more and at the same time, it terrifies me.” “Me too,” Tobin repeats, “but the risk outweighs the fear.” Alex slowly nods and gives her a crooked smile. “I had to take some time to really know that.” Tobin nods and the ice bag falls from her face, her hands reaching to catch it. “Can I look at your eye?” Alex asks, concern in her voice, “it keeps twitching,” Tobin nods, “I think my contact is out or it shifted in there.” She says, blinking rapidly as best she can. “Here,” Alex says, kneeling in front of her now, “you open your eye so I can see.” Tobin uses her fingers to hold it open, staring intently as Alex looks for her contact. “I see it.” She nods. “Do you have a case or?” she asks. “My backpack,” Tobin points to the island. Alex gets up and retrieves the backpack and then moves to the kitchen to wash her hands while Tobin fishes out her case and her glasses. “Ready?” Alex asks expectantly. Tobin nods, wincing as she forces her eye open again. It’s tender, not the worst black eye she’s ever gotten, but it certainly doesn’t tickle. The headache makes it ten times worse. “Done,” Alex says, dropping the contact in the container, looking up at Tobin, “do the other one?” “If you don’t mind,” Tobin says sheepishly, losing much of her hostility towards Alex. Alex gets that one quickly. “Thanks,” Tobin mumbles, slowly blinking her eyes. “Do you think you scratched your eye?” Alex questions, watching her closely. “No, it feels okay,” Tobin replies, “just have this headache.” “Concussion?”Tobin shakes her head, “Nah,” Alex bites her lower lip, feeling nervous, unsure of herself, “I used to get a lot headaches a while back,” she says quietly, “I found something that helps me get rid of them pretty quick, would you like me to try it on you?” she asks. “If you have any secret to me losing this headache,” Tobin nods, “by all means.” Exhaustion laces her voice. Alex moves behind the couch so she’s right behind Tobin. “Just lean forward a bit, okay?” she instructs. She slowly begins to massage Tobin’s trapezius muscles, working from her spine out towards her shoulders. Tobin lets out a soft moan, arching her back slightly as Alex works the tight muscles.Holy shit, Alex thinks as she feels the defined muscles through Tobin’s t-shirt, she is ripped. She regains focus on her task, pinching and squeezing the muscle at the clavicle, working towards her neck, massaging it gently. “Lean back” she whispers, working the muscles at the base of her skull, slipping Tobin’s hair from the ponytail, running her fingers through her scalp. She leans over to see Tobin has both eyes closed, her mouth slightly open, breathing slowly. Feeling more confidant with herself, she begins to lightly massage Tobin’s temples in a circular motion. “My last relationship ended poorly and left me feeling very insecure about myself,” she confesses, “I was made to feel inadequate, that there was something very wrong with me.” She clears her throat, “It made me feel small and very self-conscious about myself. It hurt me so bad,” she finishes, her voice nearly whispering. “I would never hurt you.” Tobin says, reaching up and placing her hand over Alex’s, squeezing it gently. She shifts her head to look up at Alex, “Never.” Alex lays her hand on the top of her head, scratching it lightly. She tilts her head slightly. “I believe you.” Tobin pats the cushion to her, raising her eyebrows. Alex moves and sits down next to her. Tobin takes her hand in hers. She swallows before she speaks, “I’ve been hurt badly in the past, too.” She says quietly. “I understand those feelings as well.”Alex nods slowly, gathering her courage, “Will you give me a second chance?” she asks quietly, her voice trembling. She’s so scared right now. Tobin leans her head back on the couch, a slow smile spreading across her face. She squeezes Alex’s hand, “For sure,” she says. Alex smiles back at her, resting her head on the couch as well. “Thanks,” “We’ll go slow.” Tobin says, “And talk. Just keep talking if anything makes us feel weird or whatever, okay?” Alex takes a deep breath, “Okay,” she agrees. They both smile at each other, Alex watching as Tobin’s eyes slowly start to close. “Tobin!” she says loudly, making her flinch and opens her eyes wide. “What?” she says, startled. “I’m not convinced you don’t have a concussion,” Alex says, “no sleeping yet.” Tobin sighs, “I’m just tired, like normal tired. I hardly got any sleep lately.” “No sleeping.” Alex states firmly. “Okay, okay,” Tobin says, sitting up more. “How’s your headache?” Tobin tilts her head, thinking for a moment, “It’s gone?” she says, her voice full wonder. “Good,” Alex smiles, happy she helped her. “Where are my manners?” Tobin frowns, “Would you like something to drink?” “No, I’m good,” Alex smiles. “really. Thanks.” “Okay,” Tobin breathes. “Thanks for making the headache go away, that was terrific.” “You’re very welcome.” Alex says sincerely. She could just melt, looking into those honey colored eyes. They stare at each other, smiling. “Let’s look at the house,” Alex says suddenly, standing up and moving to grab the tube she brought. Tobin follows her, dumping the ice bag out in the sink, leaving the plastic bag empty to reuse later. They spread the blueprints out on the kitchen table.“Uh, Alex?” Tobin questions, looking at the plans, “You said you used to get headaches a lot. Do you still get them?” she looks up at her curiously. Deciding to test out new found courage, Alex shakes her head, “No, I haven’t had them for years.” She says, thinking about how easy it is to talk to Tobin. “I was in a serious car crash my sophomore year of college and had them for just under a year.” Tobin nods solemnly, “That’s when you said you found your passion for history. Right?” Alex nods, “I couldn’t get around for awhile so reading was my go to thing.” She glosses over the details, shaking herself a bit at the memory. “Hm.” Tobin nods and must sense it isn’t easy for her to talk about because that’s all she says. She points her finger to inside the entrance. “This looks original,” she murmurs. “But this was a grand foyer,” Alex explains, “see how the living room is closed off? That would be the parlor, the main entertaining area. There,” she points further back, “that is the dining room.” “That’s my kitchen now?” Tobin looks over at the area. “Yes,” Alex nods, “back in the day, the kitchen was actually outside. The servants would cook there and bring the food in through the back of the house. And see? The study is the same. The master was actually split as servants quarters.” “Huh,” Tobin says, intrigued. “Very interesting.” Alex flips to the next page that shows the second story. “This is interesting,” she murmurs, “do you have two baths up there?” Tobin nods, “Yeah.” “Huh,” Alex says, “the original house had two, see?” She points “That’s a little unusual for the period.” She shrugs, “Unless the home was designed specifically for a large family.”They flip the next page together. “The turret is original?” Tobin grins. “Yeah, have you been up there yet?” Alex asks, curious to see the view.Tobin shakes her head, “It’s locked. My neighbors know a guy to help me unlock it.” She looks at her. “Would you like a tour?” she asks shyly. “I’d love one.” Alex smiles. “So,” Tobin starts, “this house was built over a two year period, from 1892 to 1894 and originally had three other buildings on the property: a kitchen and two servants quarters. James B. Carlisle, the architect, was an important person in Portland at the time, and as a matter of fact, some if his other buildings still stand today.” By the time she finishes her impromptu speech, she’s grinning from ear to ear. Alex laughs, “Impressive!” Tobin laughs with her, placing a hand on Alex’s low back and guiding her to the study. “So, this is where we smoke cigars and tell lies after dinner, right?” She asks her cheekily, a huge grin on her face. Alex glances around the room, there’s a faded older man sitting in a leather chair, reading a book contentedly. He looks up at her and smiles at them both. When she sees the dead, they are just a bit transparent and she can see through them a little. Some are more solid than others. The more solid, the more active and energy they have in the house. She’s gotten very good at keeping a poker face when she sees them, barely making any reaction at all. She doesn’t like to let them know she’s aware of them until she can evaluate their intentions. She’s learned over the years that it’s safer this way. She ignores him, instead asking Tobin what she had to work on to get the room to this point. Tobin points out the offending bucket, lightly kicking it with her foot and laughing. She shows her the master bedroom, explaining the colors she’s chosen and then shows her the bathroom and closet area. As Alex looks around the bathroom, she bites her lower lip when sees the shower. The rainfall shower head, the side jets, there’d be no getting cold in there with her, she thinks lustily, a brief flash of shower sex popping into her mind. She glances at Tobin, who’s blushing for some reason, and she raises her eyebrows wondering if they were both thinking similar thoughts. Tobin abruptly clears her throat and moves, insisting she show Alex the upstairs. As they walk down the hallway to take the stairs, Alex nudges her shoulder. “I’m really sorry,” she says, “I feel terrible with how I treated you.” Tobin bites her lower lip and nods, “Not gonna lie,” she says quietly, “it hurt a lot.” Alex internally cringes listening to her say that. Tobin gives her a slow smile, “But you’re here now.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
As Tobin leads Alex up the stairs, Alex can feel the energy level pick up a notch. A shy chambermaid lowers her head as they walk to the first guest room. She sees the set of sawhorses and trim laid out. “Wow,” Alex marvels. “You know how to do this?” Tobin shrugs, “My Dad showed me most of it, I just wing the rest. YouTube helps.” She gives her a sly smile. They walk to the next room, Tobin explaining how she hasn’t done a thing to it yet. Alex lets her fingers trace over the peeling wallpaper, imagining being in this room when it was new. She turns to Tobin, “This is so cool,” she says, grinning at her, “do you have an idea of how you’re decorating these rooms?” Tobin shakes her head, “Nah, not yet.” She says, “I mean, they’ll be guest rooms, but I didn’t want to get that far ahead of myself, you know?” Alex nods, “Just what you’ve done downstairs is a lot of work. I guess it would be overwhelming to try to plan all of these rooms at the same time.” She glances around the room, seeing a crying blond haired woman in the corner. “Yeah,” Tobin shrugs, “I just, I don’t know, set a goal to get the downstairs done before I moved in and be happy with whatever I get done before Christmas.” “Seems reasonable,” Alex nods her heads as they check out the first bathroom. There’s two more spirits on the second floor, another man, rather hostile but silent, and a small boy. Alex isn’t sure if these spirits can roam the house or if they limit themselves to this area. Maybe, if she gets a chance to hang out here more, she’ll get a feel for the place. A sense of nervousness develops as Alex climbs behind Tobin as they reach the attic. She takes a deep breath as she enters, glancing around quickly and casually. The room is huge. She points to the chair near the windows, “Syd is gonna have that reupholstered for me,” she informs her. “That’s a cool chair, looks comfy.” Alex grins at her. “I think this will be my studio.” Tobin states, eying the room happily. “I like to draw and paint, so this natural light is awesome.” Alex smiles, nodding her head, “It’s perfect for that.” She says, “Did you know that usually this level would be a ballroom for formal parties back in the day?” Tobin spins to look at her, “No!” she says surprised, “Really?” Alex nods, “Sure was.” She stands in the middle of the room, “Back then, they would have formal parties, with a grand dinner, cigars and drinks after, the men and women separating, then joining later for dancing.” “That’s pretty rad,” Tobin says, looking around the room, trying to envision it. She yawns, suddenly looking exhausted. Alex stands next to her, taking her hand in hers, “Are you alright?” Tobin turns to face her and gives her a sleepy smile, “Just super tired,” she says, but then brightens a moment, “Oh, you’ve got to see this!” she leads her by the hand to the far wall. She points at the trim, “This is the door to the turret.” She explains, “I can’t wait to get in there!” she exclaims. Alex can feel the surge of emotions radiating from behind the door. She can feel sadness, anguish, regret, violence, lust, pain, suffering, and a sense of vengefulness. She shivers, she knows someone is behind there, but she can’t tell who they are. She suddenly hopes Tobin doesn’t get the door unlocked for a long time. They go back downstairs, Tobin getting them both a water and they sit on the couch. “What are you doing tomorrow for Thanksgiving?” Alex asks. “Ah, just hanging around here,” Tobin states, “most of my friends are out of town and I’m going home for Christmas, so I’ll just get work on the house.” She says, rubbing her left eye. “What about you?” “I’m flying out tonight to LA to see my family.” Alex replies. “I’ll be back Saturday night.” “Cool,” Tobin says, leaning back on the couch, head resting against the cushion and yawning again. Alex shifts on the couch to face her, “Tobin, uh, I’m really concerned you might have a concussion. I know you’re tired, but is there someone you can hang with to make sure you’re alright?”Tobin smiles, shaking her head, “I’m good,” she says, “I promise, I’ve had a couple of concussions, this is just a knock.” Alex looks unconvinced. Then she gets an idea. “Okay, so, how about you take your nap and I’ll hang here just to make sure you get up and are okay?” She’s unsure of herself, not knowing if she’s being pushy.“You’ve got a flight to catch,” Tobin mumbles weakly.Alex looks at her phone, “Yeah, in seven hours. I can hang for a bit.” Tobin tilts her head, looking at her closely, “You’d do that for me?” Alex smiles, “Well, yeah, duh.” “That’s sweet of you,” Tobin says sleepily, “You’re sure?” Alex nods, getting up, “You have wifi?” she questions as she grabs her backpack. “No, I don’t.” Tobin says apologetically, “I haven’t gotten it hooked up yet.” “That’s okay,” she says brightly, pulling a book out, “I’ve got this!” she smiles, kicking off her shoes, and settling on couch. Tobin does the same, pulling the blanket over her, curling up. Alex taps Tobin’s feet, “You can stretch out, you know,” she grins, “get comfy.” Tobin stretches out a little more, still curled up. Alex grabs her feet, placing them on her lap, as she puts her feet on the coffee table. “Much better,” Tobin murmurs, taking her glasses off, placing them on the coffee table, closing her eyes. Alex pulls out her phone and quickly Googles about concussions, reading she should wake her in two hours. She nods to herself, glancing over at Tobin who is now asleep. She smiles at her, studying her features. Her eye doesn’t look like it will swell any further, however it was reddening and a slight bruise was forming. She sees a light bruise on her neck, it looks like a hickey. She wonders about it briefly, if Tobin went out and picked someone up when they weren’t talking or if she actually bruised herself on something. She doesn’t think Tobin is into casual sex, but she reasons that she doesn’t really know her that well even though she feels such a strong connection her. She sets her alarm for an hour and forty-five minutes, placing it on the end table, and snuggles down to get comfortable and opens her book. It’s only thirty minutes later when Alex starts yawning herself. She thinks she’s tired because her nerves and worry are catching up with her. She sets the book down, knowing she has an alarm set and a nap would do her some good as well. She shifts slowly, drawing more of the blanket up and placing her hands on Tobin’s shins. She closes her eyes and relaxes.She wakes hearing Tobin whine softly, moving her head from side to side, her face scrunched. Alex slowly rubs her hands on Tobin’s shins, hoping the contact would comfort her. Tobin shifts to her side, her feet still on Alex’s lap, sighing deeply as she settles. Alex drifts off soon after. She wakes again, feeling a presence. It’s the one from the attic and it feels like it is standing right behind her. She doesn’t move at all, keeping her eyes closed, breathing normal, not giving away that she is awake. She can feel some animosity directed at her. It’s confusing. She doesn’t even know who this person is. It makes her resolve grow to figure out this house. Something isn’t right. She’s not sure if it’s dangerous, but it certainly feels uncomfortable. The spirit moves away, the air feeling lighter quickly. Alex slowly opens her eyes, looking to the sides and not seeing anything. She shifts and settles, rubbing Tobin’s sock clad feet, letting herself fall asleep once more. When Alex’s phone chimes softly, she reaches out to grab it and shut it off. She looks over and sees Tobin sleeping peacefully. Part of her wants to let her sleep and get some rest, she looked exhausted when they came downstairs after the tour. But she’s still concerned that she might have a concussion, so she begins to rub her feet and calls out her name softly. Tobin blinks slowly, confused where she is, her right eye pulling every time she blinks down. She moves her head and sees Alex smiling at her. “Time to wake up sleepy head.” She says softly. “Hey,” Tobin says, giving her a slow grin, “what time is it?” “About twelve-thirty,” Alex informs her. Tobin lets out a sigh as she shifts and stretches under the blanket. Then she slowly moves to sit upright. “Did you nap, too?” she questions. Alex nods, “This is a comfy couch.” Tobin smiles, “Yeah, it is.” She briefly thinks about all of the times she’s slept in this couch at Allie’s place. Allie. She frowns. Alex tilts her head, “What’s wrong?” Tobin lightly scratches her jaw and puts on her glasses. “Uh, nothing,” she says, standing up. “Would you like something to eat before you have to leave?” she asks, looking down at her, “I don’t have much here, or we could order something.” She offers. Alex grins and stands up as well, “Let’s see what you’ve got.” Over peanut butter and jelly sandwiches they sit at the kitchen table and discuss the holidays. Alex peppering Tobin with questions as they prepare the meal with questions, evaluating her head injury. Tobin is equal parts amused and touched by her concern. “So, I’ll be home from Florida for a few days and then go to LA for, like a couple of weeks.” Tobin explains. Alex nods. “Is that January camp?” she asks. Tobin gives her a cryptic smile as she shakes her head. “I’m having surgery on my ankle,” she explains, “so I need to stay there until I get the stitches out.” “Oh, that’s terrible,” Alex says sincerely, “is it from the Final?” “No,” Tobin grimaces, “it’s a bone spur I’ve dealing with for a long time.” She shrugs, “It’s not, like, a super serious thing, they just go in and shave it down.” Alex shivers hearing that, “What’s the rehab look like?” She knows the National Team has the She Believes Cup in the spring and then preseason starts for the NWSL. Tobin leans back in her chair, “They said I won’t be cleared until the end of March,” she says quietly, looking down at her empty plate. She looks up quickly, “But, I’ll be doing my rehab here,” she smiles, “so that’s cool.” Alex smiles back at her nodding, “So, you’ll be around for New Years Eve?” she questions. Tobin nods, looking at her expectantly. “You know, my best friend has a massive party every year,” she says, “wanna be my date?” she wiggles her eyebrows. Tobin gives her a radiant smile, “I’d love to.” Alex smiles back, proud of herself. “Awesome.” They just sit there, smiling at each other until the gate buzzer goes off. “Who could that be?” Tobin questions, rising from her chair to view the monitor. Alex watches as Tobin shrugs as she presses the button to let gate open and moves to the front door.After a minute, she comes back to the table carrying a paper wrapped floral arrangement and sets it on the kitchen table. She unwraps it, revealing a beautiful display of orange flowers mixed with small tree branches shooting up from it. She finds the card and Alex watches as she bites her lower lip as she reads it. She shifts her weight and sighs. Alex can see she looks clearly upset. Tobin glances at her, “I, uh, I had a misunderstanding with a friend,” she explains softly, “and this is her apology.” “It’s beautiful,” Alex says quietly.Tobin nods, “Yeah, it is.” She says, fingering one of the petals, “orange is my favorite color.” Alex stands up, “I think I’m going to take off,” she says quietly, “I’ve got a couple of things to do before I leave.” “Oh, okay,” Tobin says, stepping close to her and hugging her tightly, “thanks so much for coming over today, I’m sure it took a lot of courage.” Alex kisses her gently, “Thank Syd,” she says, kissing her again, “she gave me a pep talk.” You know Syd?” Tobin asks, clearly surprised. Alex nods, “She’s my best friend.” Tobin nods, “I’ll be sure to thank her when I see her next,” Tobin murmurs, leaning forward to kiss her deeply.They smile when they break for air, holding each other close. Feeling brave and wanting to see how Tobin explains it, she asks her about her neck. “I don’t know,” she shrugs, “I remember carrying some trim pieces that slid away and hit me but I didn’t think it was hard enough to bruise.” She seems completely sincere about it, not trace of dishonesty. Alex nods. “I should go,” Alex says regretfully, releasing her grip on Tobin’s hips and edging away. She could stay here all day in her arms, kissing her. Tobin lowers her hands, staying close as Alex grabs her backpack. They walk to the door, Tobin stopping to hand Alex her book. “Thanks for hanging with me and making sure I was okay.” she says, giving her a soft smile. Alex grins, “Well, I don’t come across people punching themselves in the face every day, I had to make sure you weren’t concussed.” Tobin laughs, “I’ll just add it to my list of silly ways I’ve hurt myself.”Alex laughs, “We should spend an evening exchanging those stories,” she says, “I’ve got my own list.” “Have a good Thanksgiving with your family.” Tobin says, hugging her once more. “You have a good few days here,” Alex says, “I’ll be checking in to make sure you don’t have any more accidents.” “Thanks again for coming here today.” Tobin says quietly. Seriously. “Thanks for letting me in.” Alex replies, meaning the door but then realizing she means giving her a chance as well.The kiss again at the door, then Tobin leans against the doorjamb with a smile, watching Alex leave. Once she’s pulled away, Tobin shuts the door, walking back towards the living room. She spies the flowers. Allie. She needs to call her. She grabs her phone and the card from the flowers, settling on the couch, wrapping herself in the blanket, taking a few moments to gather her thoughts. She rereads Allie message.‘Tobin, I’m so sorry I was such an asshole to you about the house and your furniture. Please, please, please call me. I love you and I miss you so much.’She reads all the texts Allie sent her, listens to her messages and then FaceTimes her. Allie answers quickly, her face popping up on Tobin’s screen. “Tobin?” she questions quietly. “Hey, Har,” Tobin greets, her voice a little subdued, she’s still tired, “I got your flowers. They’re beautiful.”Tears spring to Allie’s eyes, “I’m so sorry!” She exclaims, “I was way out of line, I shouldn’t have doubted you and what you were getting.” “Did you really think I’d be shopping at a flea market or something?” Tobin asks, wondering why Allie was doubting her judgement so much. Allie hangs her head, sniffling, “All I could think of was when we shopped for your apartment and you were willing to buy a card table as your kitchen table,” she says, wiping her eyes, “and then you said you went alone and no one was there to help you,” She looks up at her, “And it made me miss you so much and I thought they took advantage of you and you’d realize six months later you got a bunch of crap.” Tobin just looks at her, “You didn’t trust my judgement?” she asks softly.Allie shakes her head, “I wasn’t thinking,” she admits, “like, this house is a really big deal and I just want it to be good for you and I miss not being there to be a part of the fun in you moving in and decorating, and painting and everything.” Tobin nods, “I miss you too,” she admits quietly, “but Al, you just, like, went off and didn’t let me explain.” Allie nods, “I was just too in my head, thinking you got a bad deal it was so cheap,” she says, her eyes downcast, “you know how I get.” “Yeah, well it really hurt.” Tobin says, tears now forming in her eyes, “I felt like you thought I was stupid and couldn’t, like, be an adult and properly buy something decent.” “I’m sorry,” Allie sighs, “I couldn’t stop myself,”They’re both quiet for a few minutes. Tobin takes off her glasses, wiping her eyes and putting them back on. “Do you really not like my house?” she asks, her voice cracking. Allie lowers her eyes, “It’s a beautiful house, Tobin.” She replies. Tobin waits. “That’s not what I asked.” She says, not letting her off the hook. “I just don’t understand why you bought it.” She says, looking up at her, “I mean, you’ve always lived in apartments, we travel so much, you couldn’t give me a solid answer on why you switched from a condo or townhome.” She sighs, “I just, it, I don’t know.” “Al,” Tobin says, wanting to hear the truth. Allie scrunches her face, peering intently at Tobin, she sighs again. “It gives me the willies.” She says, “Like, I get cold all of the sudden, and I feel like there’s people watching me and stuff. I don’t know, I just get a weird vibe.” Tobin furrows her eyebrows, “You think my house is haunted or something?” she questions. “Maybe?” Allie says, raising her eyebrows, “I mean, just the few times I was there, I could just, like, feel, something.” Tobin bites her lower lip as she processes this. “It’s not like, a scary feeling, more like a presence,” Allie continues, “maybe like a residual energy?” “Huh,” is all Tobin can say. “Did you get it blessed?” Allie asks suddenly. “Get what blessed?” Tobin asks, confused. “The house.” “Isn’t that, like, a Catholic thing?” Tobin inquires, tilting her head. “No, like, you can do it yourself, with salt and burning sage and stuff.” Allie says quickly, warming up to the subject. “Sage?” Allie nods. “It, like, resets the vibe and cleanses the negative energy out.” “Huh,” Tobin says again, thinking about how she felt so sad in the basement, the noises she hears while she’s working and that loud crash they all heard and couldn’t explain. “Maybe I should do that,” she admits. Allie nods her head rapidly, “Yeah, you should, I think it would be a big help.” “I’ll check into it,” Tobin says. “Tobin,” Allie says, “I’m sorry I hurt your feelings. I didn’t mean to be such asshole to you.” “I know,” Tobin says, giving her a small smile, “this is hard for both of us.” She shifts her position on the couch, “Maybe I was being a little too sensitive.” “Harry,” Allie clucks, “being sensitive is part of your nature and one of the many reasons I love you.” Tobin nods and clears her throat, “So, my furniture,” she air quotes the word, smirking to hassle Allie, “gets delivered the week of the tenth. I was thinking of having a get together on the sixteenth.”“Oh yeah?” Allie questions. “Well, I don’t know if you and Bati feel like flying cross country or anything, but maybe you’d” Tobin starts.“We’ll be there!” Allie exclaims. “If he can’t get off work, I’ll come. Can I come early to help you?” she rattles off excitedly. Tobin laughs, “Harry, you don’t have to ask to come, ever.” She says, giving her a genuine smile. “Would you be alright I stayed with Sinc, though?” Allie asks meekly. Tobin nods, smiling at her. “Of course,” Allie lets out a breath, “Thanks.” “Oh, maybe you could meet Alex when you’re in,” Tobin grins impishly. “What?” Allie explodes, “What happened?” Tobin fills her in on Alex’s visit and their conversation. “Wait, so you punched yourself in the face?” Allie asks, squinting at her. Tobin takes off her glasses, moving the camera close to her eye. “Oooh, that looks like it hurts.” She grimaces. Tobin nods, “Like a son of a gun.” Allie insists Tobin walk her around so she can see how the master bedroom and study are progressing. They chat easily, back to their normal selves, putting the past issue behind them. Both of them glad they resolved it. When she gets off the phone with Allie, Tobin feels immensely better and heads back in to the study to begin painting it. She uses the edge of the scraper to pry the lid off the bucket, grumbling at it as she does. Once she starts, it goes pretty fast. She cleans up the tools, rinsing out the bucket to use again, tossing the roller. She finds her paint for her bedroom, deciding to trim it out. The job goes well, it takes her almost three hours to get it all trimmed out. She sees she still has quite of bit of daylight left and knows it won’t take long to roll out the rest of the room. She decides to go for it. Hours later, she’s freshly showered, tired and ready for sleep. The master is completed except for the dark brown wall, all the paint tools are cleaned up and everything is ready for her to finish painting it tomorrow morning. She’s eating a banana while she scrolls through her phone, reading the texts from her family. She texted them updates on the house, missing them for Thanksgiving. It isn’t the first holiday she’s away from her family, but it doesn’t make it any easier. She’s had a few invites from some acquaintances to come over tomorrow, but she’s content to stay in and get some work done. She’s driven to get as much completed before she leaves for Christmas. She wants the entire first floor complete before her surgery. Alex texts her from the airport, sending her a photo of lit up palm trees. She’s just landed in LA.Tobin Heath: Oh, I miss those!Alex Morgan: Can I say I miss you?Tobin Heath: Only if I can say it as well.Alex Morgan: What have you been doing?Tobin Heath: Almost finished the master. Just one wall left.Alex Morgan: Busy! How’s the eye?Tobin Heath: Fine. Just a little swollen and a nice shiner coming in.Alex Morgan: I think you are the first person I’ve known that’s punched themselves in the face. Tobin Heath: Congratulations. You are in an exclusive group. But you’ll have to pay your membership dues. Alex Morgan: Oh? What would those be?Tobin Heath: Hhmmm…I’ll let you know. Alex Morgan: LOL whateverTobin Heath: : DAlex Morgan: Dork. I’ve gotta goTobin Heath: LaterTobin’s smiling like crazy at the exchange, feeling a warmth in her chest. She really likes Alex a lot, she’s so surprised she wasn’t an absolute nervous wreck around her this morning. Then again, maybe she was slightly concussed. Alex really put herself out there, being so honest with her and caring about her. Feeling tired, she plugs her phone in to charge, and decides to lay Allie’s mattress on the floor and sleep on that. While the couch is comfy, the mattress would be better. She grabs Allie’s blanket and the one she brought over, tossing a couple of pillows from the couch on it as well. She shuts off the lights and lays down. At some point, she wakes, feeling Alex next to her. “You didn’t go?” Tobin asks, running her fingers along her arm. “No,” she replies, “not when you’re here,” she turns and pulls Tobin in for a kiss. They kiss deeply, hands roaming, Alex gently pushing Tobin flat on her back. Alex finds Tobin’s chest, massaging her breast, twisting her nipple through her thin t-shirt. Tobin moans at the sensation, closing her eyes, trailing kisses down Alex’s neck, her hands finding her ass, squeezing and drawing her closer. Alex draws Tobin’s shirt up, just around her neckline, not taking it off. Her mouth seeking her nipple, tongue, teasing it, then gently sucking on it. Tobin’s hips rise at the feeling, “Yes,” she moans, lifting her hips to meet Alex’s and grind against them. She opens her eyes, and sees Alex looking at her in the dim light. The moon’s rays are shining through the bare windows of the living room. Ice blue eyes meet the honey speckled ones, each filled with lust and want. Tobin uses her fingers to move the hair Alex’s face, hooking it over her ear, leaning off the pillow to kiss her. As she does, she feels Alex’s cool hand travel over her stomach, lazily circling her abdominals, goosebumps popping up on Tobin's skin, finding the waistband of her sweatpants and underwear. Fingering it and sliding under along the bare skin. “Uhm,” Tobin stifles a moan as Alex’s cold fingers move through her folds. Alex is now at Tobin’s throat, sucking and biting softly, her other hand pinching her nipple, twisting a little more roughly. Tobin jerks from the slight pain, not expecting it, when she feels Alex enter her with her two fingers. Slowly she moves in the tight space, slightly twisting, her hips matching her movements against Tobin’s body. Tobin moans again, “Feels so good,” she breathes, “don’t stop.” Her hips rising to meet the gentle thrusts, enjoying the incredible sensations. Alex’s mouth finds hers again, kissing her deeply, her tongue insistently probing, making Tobin break away, out of breath and beginning to pant as the thrusts increase in tempo. They move together, their labored breathing being the only noise to fill the room. Tobin throws her head back, eyes clenched shut, hips moving wildly, feeling that tingling in her toes, that’s slowly spreading up her legs. Her center, ablaze, Alex’s fingers are rocking in and out of her, sliding across her clit, circling it roughly, making Tobin flinch and cry out as she reaches her climax. Tobin settles back on the mattress, her arms and legs useless, the euphoria still washing over her. It’s been a long time since she’s been with anyone. This feels amazing. After her breathing returns to normal and she’s able to move, she brings her hand up to run across Alex’s hair. It feels different. She opens her eyes, discovering it’s not the smooth brownish hair but dark and curly. “Alex?” she questions, confused. Greenish eyes tinged with grey meet hers. “Amore,” the gentle voice with the French accent speaks, tilting her head to smile at her. Tobin shrinks back in the mattress, confused and scared. “What?” she asks, unable to continue. A sudden wave of exhaustion hits her, she fights against it. Trying frantically to stay awake. Her eyes close, feeling cool fingers trace along her jaw.“You are mine.” That’s the last thing she hears as she passes out. November 23, 2017 Hours pass and when Tobin’s eyes flutter open against the bright rays of the sun, she smiles, remembering Alex. Her smile turns to confusion when she remembers the dark haired woman. Her eyes bolt open, looking around the room. She’s alone. She glances down and frowns, slowly pulling her left hand from under her sweats. Was it all a dream, she wonders. It had to be. Neither of them were here. She lays back, shaking her head, why do I keep dreaming of this dark haired woman. I mean, she is beautiful, but I’ve got Alex. This is so fucked up. It was all so real, it totally felt real. That orgasm, that was most certainly real, she can feel the dampness in between her legs. I did it myself, she wonders. I’ve never come like that before, she thinks. She sits up suddenly, feeling troubled. She still hasn’t shaken the weird dream later that afternoon as she finishes up waxing the wardrobe. It cleaned up very nice, and gleams with the fresh coat of wax. She leaves it in the center of the bedroom, wanting the paint to completely dry and she still needs to put the trim up in here and the study. She’s already finished the master, completing the painting of the final darker brown wall. She gets the trim pieces from the second floor, bringing them down carefully, sorting them for each wall they belong and laying them on the floor of the study. She’s going to do the floor pieces first, to get the hang of it, then she’ll tackle the intricate upper pieces. She fires up the air compressor in the basement, running the insanely long air hose upstairs and attaching the nailer.She grabs a practice piece of wood, hitting it with the gun a few times until she can successfully get the nail in without bruising or denting the wood. She’s ready. The floor work goes smoothly, every piece fitting perfectly. She takes a break to have a snack and comes back in the room to arrange the scaffolding along the wall. She watched a few videos while munching an apple, seeing how one person could put up the trim. Her Dad had recognized the trim as being called Pendleton crown molding. It was very wide, over eight inches long, with an alternating boxed in wheat and flower design. It spread onto the ceiling to give it depth and then on the wall. She started in the corner near the door, beginning with the shortest piece so it would be easier to make sure the joint fit snug. Her Dad had told her she could always use some paintable caulk if she had open areas and just seal them and stain them to hide the imperfections. The first piece took some doing, but once she joined it with the second, she recognized a certain flow to doing it. A second person sure would be helpful, the pieces were a bit heavy, but she could do it.When she finished, she looks around the room, her mouth open a little, slightly not believing she just did this herself. She snaps some photos and sends them out to her family. And Alex. Her Mom calls her first, her beaming face appearing on Tobin’s phone. “Sweetie, that’s beautiful!” she gushes. “Aw, thanks, Mom.” Tobin smiles. “Tobs, who helped you put it up?” Her brother Jeffrey calls out. Tobin shrugs, “Just me.” She replies. “No shit?” he says, their Mom slapping his shoulder. “Watch your mouth.” Tobin grins, she misses this. “It wasn’t too bad,” she says, “I figured it out.” “It looks amazing,” Katie says, “I can’t wait to see it.” “Well, maybe when they announce the schedule, I could host a holiday.” She offers, smiling at them. “That would be wonderful!” Her Mom smiles, “But who would cook?” she smirks at her.“Aw, Mom, let’s not get into details just yet,” Tobin laughs. They talk about the house a little more, then chatting about how their meal was. Tobin signs off as her phone keeps ringing, promising to call soon and keep sending updates. Her Dad is next on the line, looking proud as he greets her. “You did it yourself, didn’t you!” He laughs.“Well, yeah,” Tobin grins, “I found a video, it was cool.” “You’re doing an amazing job, I just love that trim, did you anchor it at the top and on the wall?” he asks. “I sure did,” Tobin nods, “I remembered when we took it down.” “That’s my girl,” he says, “what’s next on your list?” “Finish scraping the upstairs hallway, then getting the walls prepped and painted.” Tobin replies. “Then get started on the guest rooms.” He nods, “You’re just trucking along.” He smiles, “How’d you like plastering?” “Dad, it was so cool!” Tobin says animatedly, “Like, I think I might want to do, like, some cool textures on the guest room walls.” “Have you checked out the Venetian plaster finishes?” he asks. “Yeah, but I think maybe those are too off from the period of the house maybe, or, like the style. I don’t know.” Tobin shrugs. “That’s a good point, I’m not too sure if they used it out there back then.” He agrees, “Did you stay home and work today or go somewhere?” “Ah, I just hung out here, Dad,” Tobin admits, “I just really want to get as much as I can done before January.”“Peanut, don’t work yourself too hard,” he chides, “you don’t want to get sick.”“I know,” she says, “I take a day off here and there,” she nods, “I’m getting some help from the Historical Society. They’re researching the house.” She goes to tell him some of the highlights she’s learned so far about the house. Also, how she now has a copy of the original blueprints. She thinks she might get them framed and hang them in the study. She’s happy when she hangs up, glad to share her stories with her Dad. She double checks the house, making sure she has everything cleaned up and locked up, and then heads back her apartment. She’s getting hungry and has a plan for dinner. She texts Alex as she cooks, and Alex gives up and calls her. “So, your day sounds like it went well,” she purrs as Tobin is sliding her steak into her broiler. “Yeah, it was good,” Tobin replies, “how about you? Eat too much?” “Of course,” Alex laughs, “that’s what today is for, isn’t it?” “True,” Tobin chuckles, “I’m about to that myself,” she admits. She pours herself a glass of wine.“What are you having?” Alex inquires.“Steak, baked potato and some veggies.” Tobin replies, putting the potato in the microwave. “Sounds good,” Alex hums.“You could be not hungry.” Tobin laughs. “We ate early!” Alex burst out laughing. “Uh huh,” Tobin laughs. Tobin’s oven goes off and she gets her steak out, letting it rest. Her potato has finished cooking, removing it and placing a small bowl of vegetables in the microwave now.“Your dinner ready now?” Alex asks. “Almost,” Tobin replies, “just waiting on the veggies.” “I’ll let you go,” she says. “Thanks for calling,” Tobin says, smiling to herself. “I’ll talk to you soon,” Alex says, she’s smiling as well. “Sounds good,” Tobin says as they sign off. She happily eats her dinner, sitting at the kitchen table, watching the Redskins play against the Giants. Things are falling into place. If she had a complaint, it would that she feels so tired and she’s just perplexed from the crazy dreams she’s having. She lounges around for the evening sprawled across her couch, sipping her second glass of wine. She falls asleep on her couch, the TV still on, dishes in the sink.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
November 27, 2017 Tobin scurries around her kitchen. She’s excited, nervous and fervently praying she doesn’t burn what she is cooking for dinner. Alex is coming over and she is due any moment. They hadn’t stopped talking since Thanksgiving. Either calling, texting or FaceTiming when they had some free time. Both carry themselves with a certain amount of giddiness, being so happy.Her buzzer goes off, Tobin trotting to the wall to buzz her up. Okay, she thinks, I’ve got about ninety seconds until she’s here. Do I look alright, she wonders, racing into her bathroom, running a brush through her hair, making sure she didn’t have anything stuck in her teeth. She smooths down her sweater, wiping her hands on her dark jeans, removing the clamminess. Her doorbell rings. She’s here. Tobin takes a deep breath and opens the door. “Hi,” she greets, extending her arms as Alex moves in for a hug. “Hi, you,” Alex says, smiling back at her, hugging her and then puckering her lips for a kiss. Tobin leans forward and kisses her. “How was your day?” Tobin questions as she helps Alex out of her coat. “Was Mrs. Stark in?”Alex smiles at her, “Yes, she was.” She says as she hands a bag over to Tobin. “I brought dessert, like I said.” “Ooh, thanks!” Tobin retreats to the kitchen, Alex following. “Would you like a drink?” Tobin asks. Dinner goes wonderfully, Alex setting Tobin at ease. She compliments Tobin on dinner, Tobin blushing, just saying it was a simple salmon and some veggies. Alex asks Tobin how the house is coming along and she listens with a smile as Tobin excitedly tells her about the progress she’s made. Tobin asks her more about her visit with her family. That turns into a conversation about their families, they talk about their siblings, their parents, Tobin divulging in her struggle with her father after the divorce. She speaks quietly, talking about how the new house and his visit really seemed to bring them closer. She knows things won’t be perfect, but they seem to be headed in a good direction. They do the dishes together, bumping shoulders and eying each other with shy smiles. Alex tells Tobin about a documentary about a ship that was ice locked in Canada, trying to find the Northwest Passage and Tobin insists they watch it.Although Tobin finds it very interesting, she can’t resist how Alex keeps running her hand along her knee. They end up making out on the couch, feeling each other up. They both admit they’re not ready just yet to sleep with each other, although they’re both very turned on. It’s very late when Alex departs, Tobin kissing her deeply at the door, promising to talk tomorrow. She leaves smiling, giving Tobin a look that makes Tobin bite her lower lip and think she should take a cold shower. December 2, 2017 Tobin pauses before lifting the headboard for her bed that’s been in the living room to watch as Sinc directs Kat, Emily, Becky, and Zola to station themselves on the stairs. Lindsey is at the top of the second floor landing, waiting as Sinc transfers the first box to Kat who passes it up the stairs to Emily and they work as a team. “See?” Sinc grins, “now nobody has to climb all of the stairs.” She explains. “You just didn’t want to climb the stairs,” Emily laughs as she takes another box, twisting to hand it to Becky. “True!” Sinc laughs as well, handing another box to Kat, “But we Canadians like to work smarter, not harder.” Becky agrees and makes a wry comment about international relations that has them laughing. The movers have come and gone, all of Tobin’s boxes are either in the master, study, and kitchen. Half of the boxes they’re moving are the ones she doesn’t need just now, the other half are her art supplies for the attic. She sent the stuff from her storage room down the basement. She smiles at Alex, who is currently in the kitchen, unpacking boxes. When she was at Tobin’s apartment for dinner last week, insisting she come, but Tobin laughingly arguing she didn’t want to just use her for her muscles. When she abruptly got up from the couch and started opening the drawers and cabinets in Tobin’s kitchen, Tobin followed her out. “What are you doing?” she asked, smiling as she leaned against the counter. “I’m learning how you keep your kitchen so I can organize it at your new place.” Alex explained, bending down to open the bottom cabinets. Tobin raised her eyebrows to appreciate the view of her ass. “And stop staring at my ass,” Alex laughed, her back still turned away from her, straightening up to move to the next set of cabinets. Tobin bites her bottom lip and then a grin spread across her face. “And how will you remember where it all goes?” she asked. Alex stopped looking in the upper cabinet to look at her. She chewed on the side of her mouth as she thought about her response. She’s been trying to share more about herself with Tobin and honestly, she found it so easy to do it scared her. “I have eidetic memory.” She explains and opened the next cabinet. Tobin is just looking at her curiously. “And that is?” she inquired. Alex closed the last cabinet. “I can remember things. Like, very well. Scary good.” She explained. Tobin nodded. “I’ll tell you about it sometime.” Alex said and that was it. So, now she’s expertly putting Tobin’s kitchen possessions away and for some reason, Tobin doesn’t doubt that where Alex places her items, she won’t need to move anything to where she would prefer them. There was just something about how Alex said that about her memory that Tobin didn’t doubt her for a moment. “You alright?” Alex calls out, glancing back up at her and seeing her still blankly looking towards her from before. Tobin flinches, “Oh, yeah,” she says, smiling at her before lifting the headboard and moving it to her bedroom. Alex smiles to herself as she washes her hands. Sure, Tobin was a little spacy when they first met, but she later learned it was because she was on her pain medication. Since then, she finds that Tobin zones out sometimes, losing herself in her thoughts. It’s endearing. Alex begins preparing lunch for the crew. She loves cooking and she finds herself really enjoying offering to help Tobin. She likes feeling useful. Meeting her friends, almost all of them professional athletes, Hell, even some Olympians was slightly daunting. But they instantly set her at ease, all of them being extremely kind and down to earth. Alex smiles as she hears the laughter coming from the second floor. She can hear their footsteps as the group moves the boxes from the second floor landing to the first guest room and then also put some up in the attic. She shivers a little, remembering the presence she felt up there. She saw a few new faces today, those of the non-living. A young girl, probably no older than fifteen, looking on from the back of the house. Alex thinks she’s a former chambermaid. Then there’s the well dressed man, sitting in the living room, asking for a drink. He has the air of an aristocrat, making Alex think he might have owned this home some time a long time ago. A beautiful blond with long hair in a flimsy dress walks around the house as she holds a dark haired baby, inspecting the furniture with approval. She carries a sadness about her that Alex doesn’t understand.She flinches when Tobin slides her arms around her waist from behind. “Anything I can do to help?” she murmurs in Alex’s ear, her hot breath on her neck. Alex gulps before shaking her head, “Everything is ready, just have to gather the troops.” She smiles at her, turning her head to give her a kiss. “Thank you again for being here and working so hard today.” Tobin says sincerely, hugging her tightly, pressing her chest into Alex’s back. Alex leans back, one of her hands finding Tobin’s forearm and rubbing it. “No problem, I like being here,” she says quietly. Tobin smiles as Alex turns her head back to the tray in front of her. Tobin looks and can see a scar behind Alex’s ear that trails off into her hairline. She wonders if it was from the car crash Alex mentioned earlier. They hear an exclaim, a door slam and then loud clomping the stairs. There’s hushed tones from upstairs and then feet moving down the stairs to the main floor. “Everything okay?” Tobin asks, looking expectantly at the group. “Uh, oh, yeah,” Emily says, rubbing her arms, she looks over and punches and Lindsey, “she just scared the crap out of me.” “Hey!” Lindsey says to Emily and then turns to face Alex and Tobin, “I got her good,” she smiles. Tobin lets out a chuckle, “Well, lunch is ready, so let’s dig in.” Alex moves back from the counter, eying Emily and seeing the nervousness in her eyes. Something isn’t right, she thinks. I wonder if something happened up there. The group hovers around the counter, asking Alex to explain what’s to eat. She had made mini-sliders, a few different ones. “So, there’s some beef sliders with onions and cheese, pork ones with a creamy mustard and some baby shrimp poorboys with remoulade sauce.” She continues, “There’s a crunchy Asian salad and some panko encrusted green beans with parmesan cheese.” “Oh man!” Zola exclaims, rubbing his hands together, “This is amazing!” Becky elbows him, “Wash your hands.” She orders, then looks at her own. She shrugs and heads for the downstairs bathroom. The group splits, going to the half bath on the main floor and the kitchen sink. When they settle at the table to eat, Tobin says grace and they dig in. Becky entertains them with a few stories about her cat and his nightly hijinks. They talk about holiday plans, upcoming off season vacations and ask Alex about her work as a historian. “So, Tobin was telling me about this very interesting book she just read.” Sinc says, grinning devilishly at her. “What’d you read, Tobs?” Kat asks as she reaches for another slider on her plate. “Oh, um,” Tobin starts, sending Sinc a glare. Sinc breaks out laughing, then looks at the table, “It’s the true story of an old time movie producer who changed the way they make movies.” She explains. Alex stiffens up, hearing that. Tobin read my book, she questions, sending her a glance. “That sounds cool,” Emily enthuses, “I love watching those silent films.” “The old monster movies, the black and white ones, those are the best!” Becky adds, “The Hunchback of Notre Dame makes me cry, I every time I watch it.” Lindsey says, looking around the table. “What?” she asks as they giggle. “I always thought that Frankenstein’s monster was always misunderstood.” Zola offers. “Like, just because he was different, he was ostracized.” Alex and Tobin are silent, Alex curiously looking at Tobin seeing a blush spread up her neck. “So, who was the book about?” Kat asks. “I’m looking for something to read on the plane.” “Ah, his name is Irving Thalberg.” Tobin says, scratching at the back of her neck, sending Alex a bashful smile. Now it’s Alex’s turn to blush.“So, it was good?” Kat follows up, nodding at her to tell her more. “Yeah,” Tobin smiles, “it’s really good. Like, as soon as you start, it’s like you’re right there, back in time watching how it all unfolds.” She says, looking at them all, she turns to Alex, “It’s like, history just comes alive.” She says quietly, smiling at her as she lays her hand on Alex’s thigh and gives her a squeeze. “You know,” Sinc leans forward and looks at everyone, “the author is sitting at this table.” She grins at Alex. “What?” they exclaim, all eyes looking at a blushing Alex Morgan. “Guys,” Tobin says, not wanting Alex to feel uncomfortable, her hand hasn’t moved from Alex’s leg. Alex raises her hand and wiggles her fingers, “Guilty,” she says with a smile. “No way! Really?” Emily asks, her voice holding wonder. Alex nods. “How did you get the material?” Kat asks, leaning forward. Oh, if you only knew, Alex thinks, remembering the days of sitting with Irving and talking about his life. He was a bundle of energy, offering ideas of how to pace the book, giving her instructions of how to find additional letters, memos and sources to factually back up her story. He even insisted on the photos to use in the book and on the cover. “I was given old journals of his to look over and something sparked.” She says, looking at them all. “I pitched the idea to an agent, got a positive response to start.”“If it’s not, like, too personal or anything,” Emily says, “how did you get a book deal from it?” Alex nods, “I wrote the first chapter and let my agent read it,” she says, taking a sip of water, “he showed it around and it sort of went crazy with demand.” “That’s awesome!” Sinc says, smiling at her. She wanted everyone to know that Alex was just as impressive as she thought she was. “I read the book every break I took from working around here.” Tobin adds, smiling at Alex. Alex reaches for Tobin’s hand under the table and squeezes it. They smile at each other. “How long did it take to finish?” Zola asks. The whole group are prolific readers. Reading was one of the things to escape from the boredom of long flights, the stress of their jobs and to relax. “Two days.” Tobin grins. “I might have taken a couple of really long breaks,” she says, “it was really good.” “So, Tobs, can I borrow it?” Kat asks. Tobin makes a face, “I’m letting Sinc borrow it.” Kat looks pointedly at Sinc. “I’m recording it for my Mom.” She replies, and then turns to Alex. “My Mom has multiple sclerosis, so reading isn’t easy for her.” She explains. “Tobin wouldn’t stop gushing about how awesome it was and telling me my Mom would love it, so, I checked, but there isn’t an audio version of yours out yet, so, I’m recording it so she can listen to it.” “Oh, wow,” Alex says softly. “I hope she enjoys it.” She’s stunned. Christine Sinclair, Thorns legend, Canadian legend is recording her book so her Mom can listen to it. “Oh, she loves old Hollywood.” Sinc says, nodding, “My Mom and I watch a lot of movies together when I see her. She’s gonna love it!” she smiles at her. “How’s she doing, Chris?” Becky asks. “Pretty good,” Sinc shrugs, “you know, good days and some bad.” You can just tell it bothers her to talk about it. “So, Alex, did you do any book signings?” Becky asks. Alex nods, “Yeah, I did a bunch last year,” she says, “it was pretty wild.” “Feel weird being asked for your autograph?” Kat asks, grinning at her. Alex nods. “Yeah, it was,” she shrugs, “I don’t know, I can’t explain it. It’s like I was just doing my thing and suddenly people want my autograph and take photos with me.” “Join the club,” Sinc grins at her, letting her know they were more alike with her than she thought. Tobin gives Sinc a grateful nod and holds eye contact, now understanding why Sinc brought it up how she did. She wanted Alex to feel comfortable with them and showed her how they were on the same playing field. Even though they were athletes and she was a writer and historian, there was the common bond of having this weird, quasi-celebrity status. She breaks eye contact with Sinc and tunes back in to hearing the others gush about the first time they were asked for autographs and how it’s so weird to try and explain it to other people. Alex is fully engaged talking with them, it seems like an invisible wall had been broken. When they finish eating, Tobin insists she can take it from here, not wanting them to work more. They all flat out refuse, all looking at her with crossed arms and expectant looks, waiting for her to tell then what needs to be done next. Tobin is suddenly overwhelmed, realizing just then that she has actually moved and all of her belongings here and they need to be put away. She feels a hand on her lower back, Alex giving her a quick smile. “Why don’t you unpack your bathroom stuff.” “I’ll help Alex with the rest of the kitchen and pantry,” Becky offers, seeing Tobin’s panicked expression. “We’ll do the study,” Zola says, gesturing to Sinc and Emily. “Woohoo!” Kat high fives Lindsey. “We got the closet!” “Yes!” Lindsey exclaims, “Maybe I’ll find my hoodie.” That snaps Tobin out of it, “Linds, I don’t have your hoodie,” she says mildly. “Well, someone does!” She pouts, “I plan to hit up every Thorns closet until I find it.” They spread out and get to work. Becky wanders through an hour later, offering beers to everyone as they work. Tobin is finishing her bathroom, stacking a pile of towels in her built-in shelving unit as she accepts a beer. “Zola has the wifi working, and your TV is all set up,” Becky informs her, “he’s working on your printer now.” “Oh, man, that’s great.” Tobin smiles, shaking her head at his kindness. She hates figuring that stuff out. “I thought I had a lot of shoes.” Complains Kat, poking her head from the closet with a grin. “Just dump them all together, I’ll separate them later.” Tobin offers from the bathroom. “Good,” she laughs. “I’m leaving the box of beanies.” Lindsey informs her, “I don’t know where you want them.” “That’s fine,” Tobin says, walking towards them, “neither do I.” It’s not even four o’clock yet and all of Tobin’s boxes are cut down and stacked in the basement. The wardrobe boxes are still together, filled with packing paper. “What are you doing with your extra furniture when your new stuff comes?” Lindsey asks as she comes up the stairs from her the basement. Tobin shrugs, “Well, I’ll see if Allie wants my table instead if hers, but the other stuff, I guess, see if a rookie wants it? I don’t think I’m going to need all of it.” “That’s a good idea,” Emily says. “You know,” Sinc says, “I was thinking of donating a bunch of stuff from the lake house,” she looks at them. “Maybe I’ll keep it for the rooks.” “My Mom said I’m getting a new bedroom set for Christmas.” Kat says, “Maybe I should keep the old one around for them.” “Honey,” Zola says, wrapping his arm around Becky’s shoulders, “we should go through some of our stuff, I’m sure we have some things we don’t use and maybe someone else could.” “Yeah, I don’t use that bread machine.” She says slyly. “Oh, bread!” Sinc says dramatically, hands to her chest. “Might as well enjoy it now.” Emily grins. “Once preseason comes, it’s gone.” They all laugh. “You know, maybe I’ll send out an email to the team, asking them to hold back stuff for the rooks, when they come back for preseason.” Sinc says, looking around the table as they nod in agreement. Tobin leans against Alex, “Our diets get a little tighter then.” She explains. Alex nods.“My garage is huge,” Tobin says, “we could store everything in there.” She offers. “And have a team party here?” Kat grins, “Then they could go through it all?” “Sounds good to me,” Tobin smiles widely. Tobin reminds them of getting together on the sixteenth, telling them it’s not a housewarming, just a Christmas celebration. After they leave, Tobin and Alex collapse on the couch, heads leaning back on the cushions, heads turned to face each other. “Can you make it to my party?” Tobin asks her. “Definitely.” Alex smiles, “Everyone is so nice Tobin.” “Yeah,” Tobin smiles at her, “They’re good people.” Alex nods. “Sinc is pretty amazing.” She says quietly. “She went out of her way to make me feel comfortable.” “She is a treasure.” Tobin nods. She yawns. “Want to take a nap for a while?”Alex nods as she yawns. Tobin gets up, grabbing the blanket, “Come here,” she gestures, “there’s enough room to snuggle.” Alex gladly complies. They get comfortable under the blanket, Tobin wrapping her arm around Alex’s stomach, the two sharing the pillow. “Thanks again for everything today,” Tobin says, her voice hushed, “I really appreciate it.” Her breath tickling Alex’s neck, sending a shiver down her spine.“You’re very welcome.” Alex says, placing her hand over Tobin’s. They fall asleep quickly. Again, Alex senses the angry presence. She doesn’t open her eyes, but it feels, once again, as if it’s standing behind the couch. She can smell the fleeting scent of violets. She feels Tobin flinch slightly, mumbling something quietly. A minute passes when she does it again. This time, she moves her head, burying it in the back of Alex’s hair and mumbling something in an annoyed tone. She wonders if Tobin is always this expressive in her sleep or if she has some sort of sleep disorder. Alex feels the presence leave, a thought that Tobin can feel it as well and just doesn’t realize it going through her mind before sleep overtakes her again. “I’m just glad my mattress fits,” Tobin grins as she stretches the fitted sheet over the corner.Alex just wiggles her eyebrows at her and smirks as Tobin blushes. They work in silence making the bed. Alex is ignoring the chambermaid that is asking if she could help them. This feels somewhat intimate to her. Very couple like. “Uh, Lex,” Tobin says, Alex snapping her head up hearing the abbreviated version of her name. “You know,” Tobin begins, her voice conveying a degree of nervousness Alex hasn’t heard since they first met, “I really meant what I said about book. It’s very good.” Tobin isn’t looking at her, concentrating on putting a pillowcase on. “Thank you.” Alex says quietly. “I’m glad you liked it.” Tobin nods. “I, uh, I like to read all sorts of books,” she says, taking her snapback off and tightening her ponytail and then putting the hat back on her head, “yours was totally different than most biographies. It, like, really, came to life.” Alex smiles at her, moving across from the other side of the bed to stand next to her, hugging her. “Thanks.” She says and kisses her sweetly. Their kisses escalate, Tobin slowly moving Alex towards the bed, Alex willingly complying. They both gently lay down, arms wrapped around each other, slowly exploring each other, hands over clothing. When Alex straddles Tobin and they begin grinding on each other, she sees Tobin’s wide eyes and slows down, sliding off her and lying next to her. Both are breathing a little heavy. “I really like you,” Tobin says, turning her head to look at her. Alex wiggles her eyebrows at her, “I really like you, too,” she grins, getting up to lean on her elbows, “a lot.” Tobin leans up and over to kiss her softly. “I just don’t want our first time to be when we’re tired from unpacking and” Alex places her finger over her mouth. “I understand.” She says, looking at seriously. “I want it to be special.” Tobin nods, “So do I.” “Come on, I’m starving, let’s eat something.” Alex says, grabbing her hand and pulling her off the bed. In Tobin’s first official night in her new house, she goes to bed with a happy exhaustion. She wakes the next morning, foggy from her dreams of the dark haired woman and wondering why her pajamas are on the floor and she’s naked. December 6, 2017 “Tobin,” Sydney states seriously, “these are most definitely Tiffany.” Alex and Tobin are at her shop, bringing the lamps in and then doing dinner with her and her husband Dom. Syd pulls a thick Tiffany lamp book out from her shelf behind her, handing it Alex. “Look up Geometric lamps,” she instructs, going back to the lamps on her table in the back room. She expertly disassembles the wiring, inspecting it closely. “New wires,” she mumbles, leaving the room and coming back. Tobin is leaning over Alex’s shoulder as she pages through the book looking for her lamps. They locate them and Tobin takes photos of the pages. Syd ends up replacing all of the wiring with vintage looking brand new ones, putting in new, old style light bulbs, plugging them in and turning them on. “Woah,” Tobin marvels, she can’t wait to take these home and set them up. “They’re beautiful,” Alex murmurs, looking at the colorful lamps. “Syd,” Tobin says, still looking at the lamps, “what do I owe you?” “On the house,” she smiles, “think of it as a housewarming gift.” Tobin smiles at her, “Thanks,” she says, “then you’ll have to come to my get together, on the sixteenth. I’m having a bunch of people over to celebrate moving in.” she says easily, beaming at her. “I think we’re free,” Syd grins, “I have to admit, I’m dying to see the place.” “Well, can you come over when they deliver the furniture?” Tobin asks seriously. Syd tilts her head thinking, “I think I could manage it.” “Good,” Tobin says, “I’m sure I won’t know where to put everything I bought, I’ll probably have a million questions for you.” She laughs. Alex is watching this exchange with a wide smile on her face. Syd is her closest friend and seeing her and Tobin get along so well just pleases her to no end. “You guys ready to get dinner?” Syd asks, stepping away from the table and grabbing her coat. “Yeah, I’m starving,” Tobin says as she carefully lifts the shade from the lamp, turning it off and prepares to pack them up. When Tobin meets Syd’s husband Dom, she realizes he is new to the Timbers. She hasn’t officially met him yet, he was just signed from Seattle in the off season. They get along famously, posing for photos with a few fans as they all wait for their table. Alex and Syd look on amused, Syd leaning over to whisper in Alex’s ear. “She’s pretty amazing, Alex.” Alex blushes as she nods, smiling watching Tobin and Dom laugh with the hostess, jokingly trying to bribe her for a table. “I really like her, Syd.” Alex admits. Syd nods and bumps her shoulder, “It’s easy to see.” She elbows her and Alex turns to look at her, “I love seeing that look on your face.” Alex, filled with and impossible amount of happiness, impulsively hugs her as they approach, “Table’s ready,” Dom announces, gesturing them to follow. During their meal Syd skillfully leads the conversation, asking Tobin about the house, asking Alex about the history of it. Dom helps without realizing it by asking about ghosts and energy and how when they moved into their house, he could feel something weird. Tobin pales momentarily hearing this, “Yeah, uh,” she nods, “my best friend kinda felt the same way at my place,” she says quietly, her eyes troubled, “she said I should have it blessed.” Alex looks at her intently, concerned hearing that. “Do you think something’s there?” Syd questions, her voice neutral and open. Tobin shrugs, “I don’t know,” she admits, “sometimes I feel like, maybe?” She looks at them judging if they are taking her seriously. They are. If Tobin only knew how much. “I’ve heard things,” she says, her eyes dancing nervously, “but I don’t know.” She isn’t going to say anything about the dreams. She doesn’t want them to think she’s completely crazy or something. “Well,” Syd takes a sip of her wine, “a blessing is a very good idea. If you need help, let me know.” “You know someone?” Tobin asks, looking at her closely. “Yeah,” Syd smiles slowly, “me.” Tobin leans back in her seat. “Oh,” “It’s not that hard, I could do a cleansing, you know, it’s like giving it a fresh start.”“Honey,” Dom leans over, smirking at her, “just don’t wear the voodoo costume.” They all laugh softly. Alex feels her courage rising, “What would you think if there’s something there?” she asks Tobin, looking intently. “Would you be upset if there’s, like, ghosts or something?” Tobin tilts her head at her, seeing how serious she is. She shrugs, “I haven’t given it much thought. I mean, it’s not like I’ve had real experiences or anything really,” she pauses, “but I don’t, like, not believe they could exist, you know?” Alex nods slowly, encouraged by her answer. “Like,” Tobin continues, speaking quietly, “I mean, I believe in God and I know I have a Guardian Angel, because someone has to have been watching out for me after some of the stupid stuff I’ve done.” She chuckles, “So why not the possibility of those who haven’t totally, like, crossed over?” She shrugs again, unsure if she’s said too much. Syd reaches across and pats her hand, “I’ll bring my stuff and we can bless the place when the furniture gets delivered.” She gives her a reassuring smile, screaming with joy inside at Tobin’s wonderful response. Tobin swallows, her throat suddenly dry, glancing to see Alex giving her a look she can’t decipher. When Alex doesn’t stop looking at her, Tobin glances at Syd and Dom and then nervously looks back at Alex. “Um, Lex,” she says very quietly, “what do you think?” Alex snaps out of it, shaking her head before looking at her, “What do you mean?” she asks, chastising herself for reacting like this. “What do you think about house blessings and the possibilities of ghosts and stuff?” She’s looking at Alex as if she’s the only person in the busy restaurant. Alex nods her head slowly, “I’ve had some things happen to me that make me think there’s something out there,” is her carefully worded response. Tobin smiles at her easily, leaning close to her, “You’ll have to tell me sometime,” she says, nodding her head, “I’d love to hear your ghost stories.” Alex can hear the sincerity in her words and see the sparkle in her eye. She’s serious about it. She wants to know. Alex smiles at her, grabbing her hand and squeezing it, “I’ll tell you anything you want to know.” She feels a lightness overtake her body. She feels giddy.Tobin nods, “Awesome,” she says happily, completely unaware how her openness has lifted Alex.The server comes to the table to deliver their meals, Syd sending Alex a knowing look as Tobin is distracted. The rest of dinner is fantastic, they have a great time as Dom and Tobin share some crazy soccer stories, making Alex and Syd double over in laughter. They depart with hugs and Alex and Tobin happily hold hands as they walk to Tobin’s car.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
December 11, 2017 “Tobin!” Syd exclaims, walking around the living room, “The furniture goes so well in here!” “I already bought it, Syd,” Tobin jokes, “you don’t have to sell it to me.” She slaps her arm, “I’m serious!” “Thanks,” Tobin says with a nod, “would you like to see the rest of the place?” “Oh yeah,” Syd grins, “I want to see the study. And the master.” She says, “And the rest.” “I really liked how you thought to arrange the side chairs.” Tobin says as they walk down the hall. “Thanks,” she says, pausing to look at the living room from this angle. She nods. “It totally works.” She says with a smile. “So, here is the study,” Tobin announces, opening the door. “So, lighting this room is my current issue.” She says, walking in the dimness to click on the desk lamp. “Hm,” Syd says as she surveys the room, “there wasn’t any electrical in here on the walls or ceiling?” Tobin shakes her head. “Well, you have an outlet here,” She gestures to the wall nearest the door, “you could put a floor lamp if you wanted.” “Yeah, I guess.” Tobin says still uncertain. “There’s no rule though,” Syd advises, “you can just leave it. Unless you need more light. Oh, by the way, you totally nailed that classic study look. I love it.” “Thanks,” Tobin says shyly. “Maybe I’ll just live with it for a while and see,” Tobin suggests. “That’s what I’d do,” Syd says as they leave the room, “you don’t have to have all of the answers now, you know.” Tobin gives her a smile when they’re in the hallway going to the master. She likes Syd. She’s smart, funny and is very easy going. “Girl!” Syd exclaims, walking in to her bedroom, “this is so nice.” Tobin just grins as she nods. “I really like how it came out.” “Alex will love, this,” Syd says slyly as she walks to the bathroom. “Ooh! This is awesome!” Tobin is still blushing as she follows her in. “This space is wonderful!” Syd gushes, “It’s huge!” She’s walking slowly around the attic. “It’s wild, huh?” Tobin grins. “I was thinking of using it as my art studio, but then maybe it would cool to party up here.” “Didn’t they use to have dances up here, back in the old days?” Syd asks, looking around. “Yeah,” Tobin says, “Alex said they did.” Tobin points to the back wall, “That’s the door to the turret,” she says, “It’s locked and I haven’t gotten in there yet.” “That door is locked?” Syd repeats. “Yeah,” Tobin replies, “my neighbors know a guy that can pick the lock but he’s been out of town for a job.” “Oh” Syd says quietly, she turns to Tobin. “We can’t do the cleansing tonight.” She says, her eyes showing disappointment. Tobin tilts her head, “Did you forget the stuff you need?” she asks. “No,” Syd shakes her head, “all of the doors need to be accessible, during a cleansing.” She explains, “Oh,” Tobin says, not understanding the whole process, but if Syd says they can’t, they can’t. “Well,” she offers her a smile, “I’ll let you know when I get it open, then, okay?” Syd nods, “Sure.” Then she looks at her watch, “She should be here soon,” Tobin look at her watch, “I should get dinner started,” They head back downstairs, Tobin offering Syd a drink. She pours her a glass of pinot noir and one for herself. Then she starts pulling out the ingredients for dinner. She refers to the index card she has on the counter, making sure she pulls everything she needs. She’s making baked chicken with rice and an array of vegetables. Syd insists on helping so she tasks her with cleaning and chopping the vegetables. They’re having a serious discussion about food and GMOs when the gate chime goes off. “She’s here,” Tobin smiles, washing her hands and wiping them on her jeans as she heads to the door to greet her. Syd smiles to herself as she begins chopping the carrots. Tobin opens the door before Alex can ring the bell. “Hi,” she says, embracing her and kissing her gently, “how was your day?” “It was good,” Alex says, kissing her again, “it’s even better now.” Tobin smiles broadly at her, eyes crinkling with happiness. “I brought this for you,” Alex says, pulling a bouquet of flowers from behind her back. Tobin kisses her again, “Thank you,” bringing the flowers up to her nose and sniffing deeply, “they smell wonderful.” She smiles and takes her hand and leads in towards the kitchen, where Syd is still smiling to herself as she works on the vegetables. “Allie’s flowers were looking a little done,” Alex explains. “Thanks,” Tobin says, picking up the vase and discarding the old, wilting flowers, “I’ve been meaning to get some new ones, but I keep forgetting.” She gets her scissors out and cuts away the plastic, smiling to herself as she arranges them. “Hey Syd,” Alex leans over and side hugs her, “how’s it going?” “Just fine, sugar,” she smiles at her, giving her a wink, “did you even see the furniture?” Alex spins around to face an amused Tobin grinning at her. “Uh,” Alex looks at her, “sorry,” she says sheepishly, looking at her through her eyelashes. “Go check it out while I get dinner going,” Tobin chuckles, “would you like a glass of wine?” she questions as she holds the bottle up. “Yes, please,” Alex answers, walking over to the sofa, sitting down and looking around. She moves and tries the side chairs as well, looking up when Tobin approaches with her glass of wine. “This is very nice,” Alex smiles at her, “that couch looks very comfy.” She wiggles her eyebrows at her. “Okay, that’s it!” Syd calls out, her tone amused, “Tobin, get dinner ready, Alex, I’ll give you the tour.” Tobin laughs, extending her hand to help Alex up, “I’ll give you a private tour later,” she whispers in her ear, causing Alex to blush as she takes the glass of wine. “See,” Syd points at them both, “that’s what I’m talking about! There’s no way you’ll ever leave the bedroom and I’ll starve.” Tobin laughs as Alex and Syd go down the hall to enter the study. Syd and Alex are in the attic, “The door to the turret is locked,” Syd whispers. Alex nods, knowing what she means about the house cleansing, “I understand, say no more.” She doesn’t want to give anything away to listening ears. Syd nods knowingly back at her. “Tobin?” Alex asks as her and Syd enter the kitchen. Tobin turns and looks at her with raised eyebrows. “Do you know what’s in those three crates in the attic?” She asks. “It looked like a bunch of papers,” Tobin replies, removing the chicken from the oven. Alex’s eyebrows shoot up her forehead, “Really?” she says excitedly. “Yeah, I think so,” Tobin says casually, plating the chicken and not looking up, “the trunk is heavy so I think it has other stuff in there too.” She spoons some rice and vegetables onto each plate. She looks up and sees Syd looking amused and Alex standing there with her mouth open. “What?” she asks, oblivious as to Alex’s reaction. “Did you say papers?” Alex asks slowly, looking expectantly at Tobin. “Well, yeah,” Tobin shrugs, not understanding why she’s so excited, “I think there’s some other stuff, too. I was too excited about the lamps.” She carries two plates to the kitchen table and sets them down, “Sit down guys, let’s eat.” “Tobin,” Syd says, her voice holding back a laugh, “you saying there’s papers in those boxes to Alex is like telling an addict there’s heroin up there.” A light goes on in Tobin’s brain, “Oh,” she says looking over Alex who is biting her lower lip, “Do you think they could be important, Lex?” Syd quirks her eyebrow hearing the nickname. Alex nods her head vigorously as she eyes Tobin. “How about I bring them down after dinner?” Tobin smiles at her. “That would be great,” Alex smiles shyly back at her. Tobin nods. “Do you mind if I say grace?” Tobin eyes them both as they nod. They bow their heads. “Thank you, Lord, for those gathered here around this table and the friendships we have, please bless this food to our bodies, in Your name we pray. Amen.” “Amen,” Syd and Alex repeat as well, looking up. “This looks delicious,” Syd comments as they begin to eat. Tobin asks Alex what she thinks could be in the boxes and leads to a conversation about how Alex deciphers the documents she comes across during her research. That leads to Alex sharing her latest discovery about Tobin’s house. A suspected rum runner once lived here during Prohibition who mysteriously disappeared. It was never proven he operated his business out of the house, but most likely from his lumber business in his downtown Portland office. Syd dramatically shares how Dom’s mother was doing some researching on Ancestry.com and was scandalized when she found out that one of his great uncles was accused of smuggling Cuban cigars and marijuana from Jamaica. As Alex looks across the table while Syd speaks, she sees a well dressed man, in clothes from the thirties, walk up and stand behind Syd. He makes direct eye contact with Alex. Alex recognizes him as the man she was just speaking about. “That’s me, you were talking about,” he says, nodding at her. “My body is here on the property, I’ll show you.” Alex gives him a slight nod. “I’m not the bad guy they made me out to be,” he smiles kindly at her, “please,” he pleads, “just let me rest in peace and be buried next to my wife.” She nods imperceptibly again, shifting her gaze to Syd. She sees out of the corner of her eye, he smiles, turns and takes three steps down the hallway and disappears. Syd and Alex are carrying one crate down the stairs while Tobin has the two others stacked in her arms as she easily traverses the steps. Syd keeps making faces at Alex as they struggle with the crate. Tobin lays a towel on the kitchen island and gently sets a crate on it and pries off the lid. She stands back, gesturing to Alex. “It’s all yours, check it out.” She smiles. Alex squeals as she steps up and looks into the crate for the first time. Syd nudges Tobin, “We’re going to lose her for the rest of the night, you know that, right?” Tobin just smiles at her, “I don’t mind, it’s awesome seeing her this excited.” Alex looks up and gives Tobin a genuine smile, Tobin just said that so easily and casually, like she’s known Alex for years and knows how passionate she is about this kind of stuff and knows how rare it is to find something like this. “You know, this is the best part,” Alex explains as she leaves the island and grabs her backpack. She unzips it and pulls out a pair of thin white cotton gloves. “You just never know what treasures you’ll find.” She grins at them, like a child at Christmas. Syd glances at Tobin who is beaming as she looks at Alex. Syd shakes her head, “Before you get into it Al, I’m going to take off,” she steps to Tobin. “Thanks for dinner, this has been fun.” She smiles as she gives her a hug. “Thanks so much for everything,” Tobin says, “I’ll let you know when the attic door gets opened.” Syd nods to her and hugs Alex. “I’ll see you Saturday!” Syd calls out as she leaves. “Can I get you anything before you start?” Tobin asks solicitously, pressing her shoulder against Alex’s. “I’m good, thanks,” Alex smiles, glancing a her, pulling a piece of her hair behind her ear, “ready?” she asks excitedly, her eyes gleaming. “Let’s do this,” Tobin grins, taking a seat next to the island at the kitchen table. Hours have passed as Alex goes through each piece of paper in the crate. She keeps them in order, knowing she wants to place them back exactly how she found them. Oblivious of the time, enthralled in what’s she’s finding, Alex has no clue how late it is. When she finishes, she looks over to see Tobin leaning forward on the table, her arms crossed in front of her, head down, facing her, asleep. She looks at her watch, it’s almost two in the morning. “Yikes,” she says quietly grimacing to herself, biting her lower lip, feeling terrible that she basically ignored Tobin for the entire evening she’s been here. She noiselessly packs the crate exactly as she found it, gently placing the lid on it. She feels the aggression emanating from behind her, the spirit she hasn’t seen yet is none too pleased about this development. Alex wants to get these crates out of Tobin’s house, fearing the spirit is strong enough to destroy them. How can she make that happen without letting it know her real motivation, she thinks. As fast as she felt the presence, it’s gone. Her gaze shifts to Tobin, still asleep, her long lashes pressed lightly against her skin. She looks peaceful. One hand is splayed outward, showing the gold ring on her middle finger, nails short and evenly manicured. She likes her so much. But she she’s beginning to feel unease about her house and really hopes that once they do the cleansing, this spirit she hasn’t seen yet will be gone. Embarrassed she’s stayed so late and now Tobin is asleep, she softly lays her hand on her shoulder, moving it gently. “Tobin,” she calls out, “Tobin, wake up.” Tobin sighs, a soft noise coming from her throat, shifting her head but her eyes are still closed. “Tobin,” Alex says, her voice raised a bit, squeezing her shoulder, “wake up.” She watches as Tobin’s eyes flutter open, squinting against the kitchen light. She winces as she sits upright, rubbing her neck. “Hey,” she says, taking a deep breath and letting it out, “sorry, I didn’t mean to fall asleep.” Her voice is scratchy and low. Alex pulls out the chair next to her, rubbing her back lightly. “I’m sorry, it’s super late, and I just got caught up.” Tobin’s raising her eyebrows, trying to wake up, she rubs her eyes with fingers and sniffs. “What time is it?” “It’s almost two.” Alex says apologetically, frowning a little. “Oh,” Tobin replies sleepily. Then she turns sharply to look at her. “You have to work in the morning!” she exclaims. Alex smiles, “It’s okay,” she says, “one late night won’t kill me.” Tobin bites her lower lip, “Uh, it’s late,” she says nervously, “do you wanna just stay?” She’s unsure of Alex’s reply. “If you don’t mind,” Alex gives her a small smile, “I can just sleep on the couch.” “Nonsense,” Tobin says, pushing her chair back and standing, “let’s go.” “Do you want, like, sweats and a sweatshirt or shorts and a t-shirt?” Tobin questions she leads her to her walk-in closet. Alex shivers slightly at the prospect of sleeping in the same bed as Tobin. Tobin interprets that as her being cold and shoves a sweatshirt and sweats at her. She goes into her bathroom and Alex figures she should change her clothes quickly. She doesn’t think anything will happen between them tonight, it’s very late and they’re both tired, and they both said they wanted the first time to be something special. Not that she’d mind at all. Tobin has been invading her dreams lately, looking all hot and smooth talking her. It’s hard not to touch herself when she has those dreams, they make her wet and needing some type of relief. She wants her. She knows she does. She just, she can’t explain it, hearing Tobin is at least receptive to the idea of ghosts put her at ease, but she just wants to get to know her more before she commits her body to her. Because she knows, once she does that, if things don’t work out between them, it will be heartbreaking. Once in her new comfy outfit, she peeks her head out to see Tobin opening a wrapped toothbrush and setting it on the counter. She looks up and smiles at her. “Do you wear contacts?” she asks, “I have an extra case here.” “Oh,” Alex says, striding in to stand next to her, “Thanks, that’s great.” It feels so domestic to Tobin, the two of them taking out their contacts, brushing their teeth and washing their faces next to each other. She can’t help but smile. “What?” Alex asks, elbowing her gently. Tobin looks at her in the mirror, “An impromptu sleepover,” she grins, “this is nice.” Alex smiles back at her. “Yeah, it is.” As they slide into bed, Tobin scoots towards the middle, tentatively wrapping an arm around her, “Is this okay?” her voice is uncertain, quiet. “It’s more than okay,” Alex sighs, snuggling back against her body. “So, was there anything interesting in the crate?” Tobin asks sleepily. “Hard to tell,” Alex says to downplay her interest in case the spirit is lingering around, as she yawns, “would you mind if I take them to work?” “Not at all,” Tobin says, yawning loudly in her ear, “sorry,” “Goodnight,” Alex says, finding Tobin’s hand on her stomach and holding it. “Goodnight,” Tobin breathes out. Sleep comes easily. December 12, 2017 Alex curses her alarm when it chimes, her hand shooting out and hitting the snooze. She just wants to stay here, in this amazing bed. She finds herself laying on Tobin’s chest, her hand on her sternum, head on her breast and shoulder, their legs intertwined. Their positions having changed during the night. She feels Tobin gently rub her back. “Can I make you breakfast?” she asks sleepily. “I don’t want to move,” Alex whines. “Play hooky, call in.” Tobin suggests. Alex sighs, the truth is, she needs to get those crates out of this house. She can’t do this work here. It’s too dangerous. She just feels it in her gut. “I can’t,” she whines again, “Mrs. Stark is coming in.” She replies truthfully as she shifts and rolls away, instantly regretting the loss of warmth she felt. “I gotta go.” Tobin dutifully carries the three crates to her car, their kiss escalating in the driveway. They grin as Alex starts her vehicle and Tobin sighs happily as she walks back into the house. Now that she’s up, she isn’t tired anymore. She makes her breakfast and the windows catch her eyes. Curtains. She knows she’s been silly by not getting them sooner, but she really wanted to have her new furniture here to get a true feel of the place. She looks around the whole room, observing all of the details of the how the light plays on her furniture and the floors. She sees her TV sitting on it’s stand on the fireplace mantle. It’s temporary until she can mount it to the wall. She thinks about her idea of the box enclosure for it, an idea coming into form. She looks at the windows, nodding as she sees her idea taking shape. Smiling, she gets moving, heading off to take a shower and start her day. It’s one o’clock and she’s texting Alex. Tobin: Dinner at my place tonight? Lex: Only if I bring it. Tobin: Sure. Lex: See you around 5:30 Tobin: Can’t wait. Drive around back. I’ll leave the back door unlocked. Gate code is 9250 Happy that she’ll see Alex, Tobin continues installing the roll up shades on her living room and kitchen windows. They’re old fashioned and pretty cool, Tobin likes them a lot. She doesn’t know where the idea came from, probably some old movie she saw a long time ago. She’s going to make a simple valance to go over the top of each shade, hiding the rolled up shade and the mechanism. She’s figured out how she wants to install each one. It took her only a few minutes to sketch out her idea of the window treatment, but over an hour to take all of the measurements, doublechecking they were correct. Her first stop was to a fabric store, purchasing the lengths of course material in the color shades she wanted, having them cut to size by the salesperson. Then she purchased the hem tape and the kit to make grommets. She found these cool large black ones that would be perfect. The enthusiastic sales lady helped her figure out the spacing of the grommets, how many she needed and explained how to use the hem tape. Tobin thanked her profusely, smiling big for the photo she shyly asked to take with her. Her next stop was her favorite Ace Hardware where she was greeted by name from Mr. Sanderson who excitedly asks what brings her in today. She shows him her sketch with the measurements and he nods along as she explains what she would like to do. He explains to her that since she’s painting the wood, she doesn’t need to buy anything expensive, so she should just stick with pine mostly for this project. For her TV box she should use a nice maple to match the stain she wanted to use on it. He shows her the stock she should use and takes her note, telling her to stroll around while he gets everything together. She finds herself aimlessly strolling in the kitchen section when she sees them. Tin ceiling tiles. She looks at the measurements, they’re just two inches smaller than she measured for her idea, but they’ll work. She inspects the display, looking over the different patterns. She finds two that pick up the style of the trim in the living room and kitchen, it’s not a perfect match but it carries the theme of the straight lines. She likes them. She sees another pattern that is a bit more fanciful, the more she looks at it, the more she likes it. They would look awesome mounted on each sliding door on the cover of her TV case. She finds Mr. Sanderson and asks if she can add these to her order. “Do you have a truck or an SUV?” he questions. Tobin shakes her head. “How about I have this delivered in an hour?” he smiles at her. “Would that work for you?” “Oh, Mr. Sanderson, I’d be super grateful for that, thank you so much.” She says, smiling at him. He points to a young guy with an amazing beard, wearing a beanie, stocking the shelves. “Roger will be dropping it off.” He says, “Don’t tip him. It’s his job.” He grins at her. She gives him her address and pays for her items and heads out. She’s excited. She opened the cellar doors for Roger to bring everything in, mentioning she had to get a set of sawhorses from the garage. He insists on helping her and setting it up with another door to make a work station. She tips Roger. She lays everything out on the table, figuring out what should be done first. She decides to mount the roll up shades and make the valances first, figuring if she doesn’t get everything done, it will look slightly complete. She brings the shades upstairs, reads the directions twice and then starts. It goes easier than she expected and she’s excited about how they look. It takes her almost two hours to get all eight of them mounted, the five on the far side and the three windows on the driveway side. She thinks maybe she’ll do these throughout the entire house, they’re pretty cool and old school. Next she takes her time doing the measurements for the valance to cover the top part of the shade. She eyeballs and then measures out how low she wants the upper portion to be covered. Satisfied with her decision, she heads downstairs, clutching her measurements and preparing to begin. She stands downstairs, trying to plan out her steps to be as efficient as possible. She empties the first work table she had set up with the tools from the workbench, moving things to the floor underneath the makeshift table. Once that is cleared, she figures that will be her assembly area. The second table will be for painting. She leans the long pieces of wood against the all behind the actual workbench, stacking the similar pieces together so like is with like. The valance. She reviews her measurements, finds her safety glasses and begins. She decides to make one complete first, just to make sure her measurements are correct and it actually works before making a ton of cuts and having them all be wrong. It doesn’t take her long to cut the pieces and have them laid out on the table. She fires up the air compressor, checking that the nail gun is loaded and pops a couple of nails in to join the pieces. Excited, she runs up the stairs with it, bringing it to the window to see how it looks. Perfect. She smiles as she grabs a water and heads back downstairs. I should sand this before I paint it, she suddenly remembers. She gets the sander out, remembering to change the paper to smooth grit. I’ll get them all cut first, then sand them all at the same time and then clean it all up and paint. She makes sure she cuts the mounting pieces that she’ll screw to the wall and then screw the valance to that as well. She jumps when a hand touches her shoulder, making her drop the wood in surprise. It’s Alex looking apologetic. She turns off the loud sander. “I’m so sorry!” Alex says, laughing and holding onto Tobin’s arm, “I was calling but you couldn’t hear me.” Tobin raises her hand to her chest, looking at her with wide eyes, “You scared the shit out me!” she exclaims. “I’m sorry,” Alex says sincerely, moving closer to hug her, but Tobin dances away, “I’m all gross and dusty,” she says, “you’ll ruin your sweater.” “Nonsense,” Alex says firmly, embracing her tightly, her hands sliding to Tobin’s ass, gripping it firmly and pressing her close. “Now kiss me hello,” she orders, her voice low and sultry. Tobin gulps as she looks at her, moving slowly forward and kissing her. It’s soft and gentle and Alex can feel as Tobin’s hands roam across her back, lightly trailing her spine and shoulders. Their kiss intensifies, tongues searching each other, Alex pressing their bodies closer, earning a moan from Tobin. They break apart, smiling at each other. “Hello,” Tobin says, looking into the amazing blue eyes, thinking how grateful she is to see them in front of her. “How was your day?” “It was good,” Alex smiles back, “but dinner is here and I’m starving.” Tobin nods, “I have one more piece to finish sanding and then I’ll be up, okay?” “Don’t be too long,” Alex grins as she takes a step back out her embrace, “I’m serious about food. I’ll start without you.” “I’ll be quick,” Tobin laughs, “be up in a minute.” It’s actually five minutes when Tobin comes up, spending some time to shake as much sawdust from herself as she could. Alex is patiently waiting for her, their meals plated and waters on the table. “This looks great,” Tobin says, finishing washing her hands at the kitchen sink and sliding into the chair next to her. Since the first time Alex has eaten here, Tobin sits at the head of the table and Alex on her right. That way they can hold hands while they eat. Alex eyes Tobin and nods for her to say grace before they eat. “Where did you get this?” Tobin questions after her first forkful. “There’s an Italian joint right by my work,” Alex replies as she finishes chewing. “It’s great!” Tobin exclaims, taking another big forkful of pasta. “We should go there sometime, yeah?” Alex smiles and nods, happy to think of them going out together. “So, what are you making down there?” Alex asks, taking a hold of Tobin’s hand under the table. Tobin squeezes it. “I’m making my window treatments.” She replies, Alex loves how her voice is mixed with excitement and pride. “Really?” Alex leans forward towards her, so intrigued. “Yep!” Tobin grins, taking another forkful of noodles. “I’ll show you the design after we eat, okay?” “I can’t wait,” Alex says, “I’m so impressed you know how to do so much of this house remodel stuff.” She says, “I don’t know how to anything except paint.” Tobin’s nodding as she speaks, “I know, right?” she says, “I’ve lived in apartments all my adult life, all I knew was to call the super. But this, like, my Dad showed me how to do some stuff and, like, something just clicked in my brain, you know? So, then I started figuring out how to do other stuff and,” she shrugs, “it’s, like, kinda empowering, I mean, I don’t get it right the first time, but I do it again and figure it out.” Alex watches her closely as she speaks with such excitement and passion. It’s probably the most she’s spoken to her in one burst. It’s pretty awesome to see this side of her. “I am woman, hear me roar?” Alex grins at her. Tobin throws back her head, letting out a belly laugh, squeezing her hand again, “Something like that, actually.” They eat in silence for a few minutes, both of them hungry. “So,” Alex says, wiping her mouth with a napkin, “Saturday.” Tobin nods, “Saturday?” “Would it be cool if I came a little early to help you get everything together?” she asks shyly. She sees Tobin visibly relax, “That would be great,” she says seriously, “I’m getting a little nervous about it.” “Really? Why?” Alex asks, concern in her voice. “Well,” Tobin leans back in her chair, scratching at the back of her neck. Alex is slowly realizing it’s her nervous tic. “This is, like, the first real, like, get together I’ve ever thrown and word kinda spread and now there’s gonna be, like, forty people here and I’m not sure about how, like, how much food, and everything.” “Oh, sweetheart!” Alex exclaims, reaching over so she can take her other hand, “It’ll be fine! I’ll help, we can figure it all out. We’ve got plenty time.” “You’d really help?” Tobin asks her shyly. “Of course!” Alex states. “I love throwing parties, we’ll make it fun.” “Thank you,” Tobin says, her eyes surprisingly brimming with unshed tears, “with Allie not here, it just got overwhelming.” she says quickly. “I got your back,” Alex smiles at her, “it’ll be perfect.” Tobin sniffs and wipes at her eyes, “I don’t know why I’m stressing out so much about this.” She chuckles softly. “I mean, I, like, know everyone that’s coming, but it’s just different. I want it to be more than just ordering pizzas and beer.” “It’s your house,” Alex explains, “this is a big deal, okay? It’s okay to be nervous, but I’ll help and we’ll look stuff up and it will be fine.” “Okay,” Tobin says, letting out a deep breath. “Today is Monday,” Alex states, “do you think you can finish your window project tomorrow during the day?” Tobin nods, “I think so.” “Good.” Alex nods. “How about you come to my place for dinner tomorrow and we’ll sit down and go over what you’ll need and how much it will cost and what you’ll serve and everything. Okay?” “That would be great.” Tobin leans across the table and kisses her, “Thank you so much.” “My pleasure,” Alex murmurs, kissing her again, “would it be okay if I stayed over on Saturday?” Tobin smiles at her, “It would be fantastic.” “Good.” Alex smiles back at her. “Now let’s go see your plans for these windows, I’m so intrigued.” An hour later, Alex is dressed in an old skateboard sweatshirt with a borderline ratty pair of sweatpants, brushing paint on the valances. Tobin is next to her, putting black glossy paint on the ceiling tiles. “What a creative way to use those tiles,” Alex comments as she concentrates on her work. “I just stumbled across them and they, like, screamed out to me.” Tobin explains. “I think they’ll look awesome.” Alex smiles as she works. “Do you know how to do the grommet part for the drapes?” Out of the corner of her eye, she sees Tobin shake her head, “Nah, but I brought some extra material and an extra kit to practice.” “Good thinking.” Alex nods her head. As they finish up, Tobin hugs Alex, squeezing her tight, “Thank you so much for tonight,” she says softly, “I was really stressing about the party and I appreciate your offer to help.” Alex rests her hand on Tobin’s chest, just under her shoulder, “It’s okay, girlfriend,” she laughs lightly, “I’m happy to help.” She kisses her. “Girlfriend, huh?” Tobin says as she kisses her back. “I like the sound of that.” “You do?” Alex looks at her steadily, unsure if she’s pushing or anything. It just feels right. “I do,” Tobin smiles at her, leaning in to kiss her deeply. Suddenly the room is black. “What the” Tobin mutters, pulling her phone from her pocket. Alex grabs hers off the table, throwing a little light in the room. “Uh, has this happened before?” she asks nervously. “No,” is the short reply. Tobin takes a step away from her. Alex reaches out and grabs her hand. Tobin squeezes it. “The breaker panel is over there.” She gestures uselessly in the dark, Alex can’t see where she was pointing. The air suddenly becomes thick with tension. They slowly make their way to the back of the basement near the workbench, Tobin finding the access panel and twisting it open. She shines her phone on it, looking at the switches. “Hey, Lex?” she asks, turning to her, “Can you look up the stairs and see if it’s the whole house or just down here?” “Sure,” Alex says, loosening her grip from Tobin’s hand, edging back around towards the stairs. “It’s the whole house.” She calls out as she slowly walks back towards her. She can hear Tobin flicking switches. Suddenly, the room fills with light. “That was weird,” Tobin says, blinking at her. “Uh huh,” Alex agrees. “Well, I guess we should clean up and call it a night.” Tobin says, making sure the lid is on the paint can. They climb the stairs together. Once they’re back on the main floor, Tobin nudges her, “So, uh, Allie will be in town for the party.” She says, “So, it’s, like, cool to introduce you to her as my girlfriend?” she asks shyly. Alex smiles and circles her arms around her. “Absolutely.” She kisses her. “Cool,” Alex grins, “I can’t wait to meet her as well.” It’s fairly common knowledge to anyone in Portland that remotely follows soccer the duo known as ‘Harry’. She knows they’ve been best friends for a long time. It doesn’t make her nervous, surprisingly enough. She’s confident in herself and everyone else she’s met in Tobin’s life has been awesome. She sees no reason for this to be different. Although she does expect to get some form of the best friend talk. She wonders if Syd gave one to Tobin. Probably not. Tobin would have mentioned it. “What are you thinking?” Tobin asks, drawing her from her thoughts. Alex wiggles her eyebrows, “I’m thinking if Allie will give me the best friend talk,” she chuckles. “Oh,” is the short reply, Tobin’s mouth still in the shape of an ‘o’ as she thinks about it. She rubs the back of her neck, “You might,” she winces as she nods her head, “Allie can be pretty direct.” “I’m not worried at all.” Alex reassures her, “She has to be a pretty amazing person to be your friend.” Tobin tilts her head, confused. “That came out wrong,” Alex laughs, hugging her, “I mean, everyone I met through you has been pretty amazing, so she shouldn’t be any different.” “Well,” Tobin laughs softly, “she’s certainly one of a kind.” Alex departs soon after, citing the need to get to sleep early and reminding Tobin to come to dinner. It will be Tobin’s first time at her house and she’s excited about it. It’s sometime during the night when Tobin wakes shivering. She’s actually shaking under her comforter because she’s so cold. She gets out of bed, rubbing her bare arms as she pads softly to the hallway where the thermostat is located. Squinting as she presses the button to light up the display, she reads it’s seventy degrees in the house. She hears the click of the thermostat as she presses the button up a couple of degrees, the furnace rumbling quietly to life. She goes back to her room, putting on a pair of thick sweatpants, some socks and hoodie. She sees the light is muted in the room, looking out the bare window to see frost on the window. She didn’t think it was supposed to get that cold tonight. She approaches the window, touching the glass and realizing the frost is on the inside of the pane of glass. Using her fingertip, she absentmindedly draws a smiley face on the window before shaking again from the cold and returning to her bed, wrapping herself in her comforter. She curls into a tight ball, crossing her arms to her chest to stay warm as she drifts off to sleep again. She wakes before dawn, hot, sweaty, the covers kicked off, her hoodie riding up exposing her stomach. She’s flat on her back, her hair damp with sweat. Arms and legs spread out, one sock kicked off during the night. She wipes her forehead as she gets up from the bed, shaking her head. Did she dream she was so cold, she wonders as she takes off the hoodie. She spies the window, squinting at it and seeing the faint lines from her smiley face drawing. What the hell is going on?
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
December 13, 2017 She can’t believe she finished it. Finished it and it looks sharp. Tobin is staring at the three windows that line the driveway, gazing at the glossy black plank across the top of the window with black brackets that hold the round black dowel rod with square corners on each end. The plank extends downward one foot on each side of the window, ending with a short six inch dowel rod with the same square end cap as the top rod. All in glossy black. She likes how it frames the window and still allows plenty of space to put something on the wall space in between them. She’s not sure of that yet. The first window has drapes a shade darker than the walls that picks up a hint of the honey colored stain from the furniture she restored from the attic. The second window panel’s drapes are a dark shade of brown, nearly matching her sofa, with the third repeating the lighter tan. Black metal holdbacks open the drapes to show off the black glossy tin panel, mounted two feet above each window, the glossiness, reflecting light from its surface. She tilted the panels, not liking having them just be squares on the walls. The line designs lead one’s eye to the ceiling trim, studying the crown molding and recognizing he similar pattern. Across the room, the five windows are the same, tan, brown, tan, brown and the last one tan. She thought she was taking a chance on having two different color window treatments, especially when the nice lady at the fabric store murmured how unusual of an idea it was. But she likes it. She thinks having the same color would be boring and predictable. Next on her list is to make the TV cabinet. She had brought the tin pieces upstairs and leaned them against the mantle, just to check them out. She noticed how the unusual pattern showed shapes similar to her fireplace screen. An idea was born. Tomorrow, after making the cabinet, she would paint it black except for some splashes of color on each tin piece, making it look more interesting. Now, she had to shower and get ready to go to Alex’s house for dinner. December 16, 2017 Tobin is drying her hair, brushing it out and warming herself from the blow dryer. She’s just in her a sports bra, her jeans unbutton, feet bare. She’s excited about tonight, proud
to show off her home. And it is a home. It feels like home to her. Sure, she isn’t finished with it yet, there’s a million things to do upstairs and even downstairs, making sure to complete her decorating, but for now, she’s good. She thinks of Tuesday night with Alex. Her home cozy, instantly welcoming and smelling wonderful from the filet mignon she had in the broiler. Dinner was fantastic, eying each other as they ate and spoke of their day. It just felt so, so incredibly right to her. Alex is just perfect. Tobin brought her flowers, finding a small bouquet of daisies she thought she would like. Her own joy was seeing Alex’s face light up when she saw them. After they cleaned up the kitchen together, they sat down and worked on Tobin’s event. Alex had a list to show her of the things should would need, admitting shyly she had worked on it while she was at work. Together they created a menu that Tobin could live with, insisting she wanted to cook and not have it catered. It was important to be able to feed her friends something homecooked. When Alex inquired about what they liked and what Tobin could manage making, they settled on a Mexican theme and do tacos with various meats and all of the side trimmings. Tobin questioned how much booze she should purchase, and they referred to an online article about entertaining that was very helpful. By the time Tobin left, after a heated makeout session, she was feeling confident about everything. Wednesday, she found herself grocery shopping in the morning, smiling to the checkout lady as they bagged her stuff. After hauling it in the house and putting it away, she looked up the best restaurant supply place open to the public. She had an idea that now she had this place with so much room, she wanted to host parties as much as she could. Especially for her family. This Christmas, she would offer again to host the following year at her house to her family. She didn’t want to serve with plastic, so she browsed the aisles until she found utensils that she liked. The young salesperson left her after a few minutes as they loaded up the first cart, coming back with the owner who greeted her enthusiastically. He personally helped her select the additional items on her list, explaining her choices and what she should consider on each item. As they shopped, he told her how they were a second generation business, he taking it over from his father and now his daughter was managing it. His other daughter was off in college, playing soccer for UNC. Tobin snapped her head at that, asking her name. He proudly told her about her accomplishments, and Tobin was excited for her, telling him she had seen her play many games when she watched them online. He had a deal for her, he said, asking if she would take a photo and give him a shout out on Twitter in exchange for a twenty-five percent discount. She refused, stating she would gladly give a shout out for another Tar Heel, don’t worry about it. They did their photo and she told him she’d posted it when she got home. She explained how she didn’t like to post things right then and there, seeing as how some fans were a little over enthusiastic and made her uncomfortable. He ended up giving her a thirty percent off deal, citing his need to do that for a Tar Heel and a Thorns player. As they were loading his car, she found a beat up soccer ball in her trunk, signing it with a short message for his daughter. They shook hands and Tobin said they’d be in touch, she’d send his family tickets for a game when his daughter was home. On Thursday she cooked, chopped an enormous amount of vegetables, used her dish washer all day, washing the plates, silverware and the beer and wine glasses she had purchased. She used her jacuzzi that night, relaxing against the pulsing currents. Now, Allie was here, insisting on making the guacamole and Alex would be over soon. She couldn’t wait for Alex to see her windows and how she has everything set up for the party. She couldn’t wait for Allie to meet Alex. Allie is peacefully mixing the guac, humming along to the soft music playing when she hears the back door open and footsteps entering. “Babe,” Alex calls out as she walks in, “I brought Clementines because I know you like them bet-” Alex stops, seeing Allie in the kitchen. “Hi there,” Allie grins at her, wiping her hands with a dish towel and standing up. “I’m Allie, you must be Alex.” Alex puts the bags in her hands on the kitchen table. “Yes, nice to meet you Allie, I’ve heard so many wonderful things about you.” She smiles at her, extending her hand to shake. Allie waves it off, instead giving her a hug. “I’m not just shaking hands with the woman who’s making Tobin so happy.” She says warmly as they pull apart. “Thanks,” Alex says, “she’s pretty terrific herself.” Allie just smiles at her, “She is,” she nods simply. After a moment of mutual Tobin appreciation, Allie gestures to the bags, “What’d you bring?” “Oranges, lemons and Clementines.” Alex informs her. Allies scrunches her face, “Who thinks of Clementines?” she teases. Alex shrugs with a grin, “People who put oranges and lemons in their beer?” They both laugh. Soon Alex is washing the fruit and Allie is drying each piece before they cut them up. Allie watches as Alex retrieves two cutting boards, knowing exactly where they were located in Tobin’s kitchen. She pauses for a moment to view the windows, her mouth dropping open slightly. “What?” Allie questions. “They turned out fantastic,” she points. “Yeah, they look really good,” Allie comments as she brings a handful of the fruit over to the table, “She really made it work for this space.” “I know,” Alex agrees, sitting beside to begin slicing, “when I saw the drawings, I couldn’t believe she was going to make it.” Allie places a hand on Alex’s forearm, “Wait, she made it?” she questions, her eyes growing large. “What did she make?” Alex gestures to the window with her knife, “The whole thing, she installed the shades, made the valance, the bracket and support rod,” she nods, “she even made the drapes.” “Wow,” Allie marvels, getting up and looking closer, “she didn’t say she made them.” Alex just shrugs. “I’m really going to miss being here,” Allie sighs, sitting back down. Alex hands her the second knife. “Thanks,” she murmurs, beginning to slice an orange. “I’m getting traded.”
She says quietly. “Oh no!” Alex exclaims, “I’m so sorry,” she says, “I’ll miss watching you play here, you have such a wonderful vision of the field and building plays, not to mention the set pieces.” Allie turns to her, arching an eyebrow. “Riveter.” Alex winks at her. Allie smiles and leans into her side, “I just knew you were a good egg!” she laughs. “Say, your book was terrific! I couldn’t believe it was just about that small part of his life, are you going to do another one about his whole life?” “You read my book?” Alex questions, incredibly surprised. “Oh yeah,” Allie says, still cutting and not seeing her reaction, “Tobin sent me a copy and told me I had to read it.” “Really?” Alex says, setting the knife down. Tobin sent her best friend her book to read, she thinks, trying to wrap her head around it. “It’s such a fast read, too,” Allie continues enthusiastically, “I wanted to know everything about him! I Googled him and on the flight I watched that documentary the Prince of Hollywood. He was so interesting!” she gushes. “Yeah,” Alex agrees, if you only knew, she thinks. “Harry!” they hear Tobin call from the bedroom.“What?” she yells back. “Listen, when Alex gets here, please don’t give her a hard time, okay? She said she’s not nervous but please don’t make her feel uncomfortable, alright? I just want her to be cool about tonight. I’m super nervous as it is and I just want everything to go” she stops in her tracks, seeing the two sitting at the table looking at her thoroughly amused. “well.” Tobin finishes, frozen in place. “I see you met,” Tobin says slowly, her eyes darting between the two women, looking for any signs of trouble. “We did.” Allie says stiffly, looking down to cut another orange. “Uh huh,” Alex agrees, doing the same. Tobin studies them, trying to gauge the situation. “So, when in the last month did you turn into Martha Stewart, Miss, I Made The Window Treatments and Even The Frigging Drapes?” Allie asks, not looking up from her task. Tobin begins to blush, “Ah, um,” she says, stalling because she doesn’t know how to reply. “And how did I not know you were such a book critic, Miss, Sending Out Biographies Of Old Film Producers To Your Friends?” Alex asks, concentrating on her Clementines. “Uh, well,” Tobin begins, feeling anxious and scratching the back of her neck until she sees Allie nudge Alex and the two begin holding back laughter. “Wait a minute here,” Tobin says, stepping closer to them, eyes narrowing, “what is going on?” “Nothing,” Allie smiles, “she just has terrific taste in soccer players.” “And she just has terrific taste in books.” Alex adds laughing. “Alright, you two,” Tobin says, “now I see it, you two are gonna be trouble together, aren’t you?” “Like you won’t believe!” Allie laughs as Alex giggles finally looking up at Tobin and puckering her lips. Tobin bends down and kisses her. “Hi!” She says softly and smiles. “Hi,” Alex says, smiling up at her, “you look terrific. I like that button down.” “Thanks, so do you, I like that sweater,” Tobin relies, rubbing Alex’s back, “ooh!” she says excitedly, “Are those Clementines?” she reaches for one, Alex slapping at her hand. “Oh, come on,” Tobin whines, “I’m hungry!” Alex passes her the Clementine as she shakes her head. “You didn’t eat lunch, did you?” “No,” Tobin admits, “I took a nap instead,” Alex looks up again, studying her. “Still not sleeping well?” she asks quietly, aware of Allie observing their exchange. Tobin shrugs, “Yeah, it’s just really strange. I don’t know what’s going on.” “Are you sleepwalking again?” Allie asks, looking concerned. “Maybe?” Tobin shrugs. Both women look at her expectantly. “Like, sometimes I wake up wearing different clothes,” she admits quietly, “or in another room.” “Huh,” Alex says, a theory beginning to brew in her mind. “Do you think you need another sleep study?” Allie asks, cutting the lemons. “I don’t know,” Tobin says, “I think it’s just getting used to being in a new place,” she says as she peels the skin off the small fruit. Allie nods at her response, but Alex looks up at her. “I was kinda of a mess in college,” Tobin explains, “I had a lot of anxiety issues and it manifested in a major sleep disorder.” “Oh,” Alex says softly, “I’m sorry to hear that,” she says, giving her a small smile. “Yeah,” Tobin sits down and begins breaking the fruit into pieces, “my parents were getting a divorce, I was playing college ball and on the National Team and making the Olympic
Team made me a wreck,” she smiles wryly, “I just wasn’t in a good place.”Allie shakes her head at the memory. “But you started taking care of yourself and things got much better.” “Yeah, but not without you being there for me.” Tobin gives her a grateful smile, she turns to Alex, “We kind of bonded back then.” “That’s pretty awesome,” Alex says, giving them both a smile. The three are silent for a minute, the music playing softly in the background. “Do you have bowls for these?” Alex questions, looking up.“Oh, right,” Tobin gets up, popping a piece of fruit in her mouth and retrieves the small black bowls. “Thanks for doing this, guys, I really appreciate all of your help.” “Not a prob, Har,” Allie says, putting the lemons in the bowl. “Don’t mind at all,” Alex smiles, “is there anything else to do?” “I think we’ve got it covered,” Tobin replies, “everything is in the chafing dishes, the cold stuff I’ll bring out in a few minutes.” “I can’t believe you bought chafing dishes,” Allie shakes her head. She stands up, going to wash her hands and then takes out her phone, snapping a couple of photos. “What are you doing?” Tobin inquires, seeing her mess with her phone. “Sending these to your Mom,” Allie giggles, “she’s gonna faint.” “Harry!” Tobin exclaims, reaching for the phone. “Too late!” Allie exclaims, dancing away. The gate chime goes off. “Saved by the bell, Har,” Tobin says, walking to view the monitor before opening the gate. The night has been fun. Syd and Dom hit it off with the crowd, a few of the players recognizing Syd from her store and knowing of Dom from the soccer world. Karen and Jamie came over, knowing them as well, everyone having a good time. They all were impressed with Tobin’s house, Allie was making a big deal out of calling her Martha Stewart and making sure everyone knew she made the window treatments. She was directing the tours of the house. People are scattered around, hanging out in the living room and kitchen, some drifting to the study to hang out. Everyone has eaten and some are going back for more tacos or appetizers. Everything has gone smoothly. Tobin took Alex around to meet more of the team and their significant others, some coaches and even Mark Parsons himself, who was there with his wife. The four talked for over twenty minutes, Mark intrigued about the historian.Tobin excuses herself to check on the food, leaving Alex with the two. “I heard you wrote a book,” Mark smiles at her. Alex blushes, “Just a biography.” She answers shyly. “Oh, sweetheart,” his wife says, “I’m reading it right now, it’s terrific!” Alex looks up at her with wide eyes, “Really?” She nods happily, smiling at her. “Very much so. Mark wants to read it next.” She turns to look at him, he smiles, “We have a group chat on books for the team, so when someone suggests a good one, we try to check it out.” “Someone needs to tell Powell’s to reorder,” his wife adds, “I bought the last copy.” “Wow,” Alex whispers, “that’s pretty wild.” “You’re an excellent author.” She continues, “Are you working on another book now?” Alex shakes her head, “I haven’t found anything compelling to write about just yet,” she explains, “the Thalberg one just sort of fell in my lap.” “Well, I hope you write again, because this book is amazing.” She smiles. “Thank you very much,” Alex replies, smiling. Emily pulls on Mark’s arm, “Coach!” she says loudly, she’s a little tipsy, “Tell Sinc about the road trip we had during the World Cup, she doesn’t believe me.” Alex excuses herself, walking to find Tobin standing alone in the kitchen, a small smile on her face as she looks over the living room. “Everything okay?” Alex asks as she steps next to her. Tobin looks at her, smiling wider, “It’s great,” she says, putting her arm around her waist, “it’s perfect.” “You did a great job.” Alex says, leaning her head against Tobin’s shoulder.“I couldn’t have done it without your help.” Tobin says, turning her and enveloping her in a hug. “Thank you so much,” she whispers in her ear before dipping her head to place a sweet kiss in her lips. They hug for a moment, before they both feel a body collide with them. “This is a great party!” Becky exclaims, hugging both of them. An hour later, Alex was chatting with Syd when she felt the presence. She let herself slowly gaze around the room, feeling the presence come from the second floor landing, just out of view. She observes, Allie rubbing her arms, as if she’s felt a sudden chill and looking around sharply. She sees Jamie eye the landing, looking concerned. She looks up as well and glances back, seeing Jamie staring at her. Jamie approaches her. “Hey Alex, how’s it going?” she asks, looking at her intently. “Pretty good, how about you?” Alex asks, unsure where this will lead. They came over to Tobin’s for dinner the other night and that’s when Alex met her and Karen. She likes them. “Come join me for a smoke?” Jamie offers, “I’d like to talk to you about something.” She boldly says. “Yeah,” Alex nods, “let me grab my jacket,” she replies, they move through the crowd to the hall closet. Once outside, they walk to the side of the driveway, Jamie lights up her pipe, taking a hit. She exhales and offers it to Alex. She takes a hit. “Alex, I’m going to go out on a limb here,” Jamie says casually, “but did you, like, feel something in there just then?” She’s looking at her expectantly. Alex looks down, biting her lip. She always uncomfortable when asked about this. “Because I did,” Jamie states, “and I hate that bitch.” Alex looks up quickly at her. “What do you mean?” Jamie looks at the house, “I think she’s responsible for my brother’s death.” Alex gasps. Jamie looks at her quickly. “You felt it, right?” Alex nods her head. “It’s a woman?” she whispers. Jamie nods grimly. “Can you see them, too?” she asks. Alex slowly nods back as they hear footsteps on the porch coming towards them, it’s Allie. “I thought I saw you guys sneak out,” she smiles, walking to them. “Want some?” Jamie offers, holding her pipe. “Ooh, really?” Allie asks, “Thanks!” she takes a hit. Exhaling she looks at both of them. “What is wrong with Tobin’s house?” she asks them seriously. “Uh,” Jamie starts, looking at Alex. “I promise, I won’t say a thing.” Allie says, raising her hand to her chest, “But, I get a weird vibe in this place and I saw you guys looking up at the landing and it was, like, freezing
cold in there for a minute or something. The whole thing about this place, how she got it so cheap, them leaving all those tools in there,” she pauses, looking at them, her eyes searching theirs, “I’m just worried for Tobin.” She finishes quietly. Jamie sighs, “There’s something in there.” Alex watches Allie’s reaction. She scrunches her face, “I knew it.” She says in a whisper. “We’re planning to do a cleansing, but we need that attic door unlocked.” Alex says, “It should really help get the presence out.” She hopes she sounds comforting. Jamie massages the back of her neck. “My guy comes back tomorrow, I could have him here Monday night. Karen and I could help with the cleansing on Tuesday.” She offers. “Is someone helping you?” Alex nods, “Syd. I’ll be here Tuesday night, Tobin leaves on Wednesday.”“Is she in danger?” Allie asks looking at them both. “I don’t think so,” Jamie answers, “but it’s better to get them out.” She doesn’t want to scare her. “We were here one time,” Allie says, looking up at the dark top floor, “up in the attic, talking about the turret, when there was this super loud crash downstairs.”Jamie nods, “Yeah,” “That’s normal?” Allie asks, her eyes wide. “The power went out the other night.” Alex says quietly, “She just had to flip the circuit breaker, but it was weird.” “That basement,” Allie shivers. She shakes her head. “Will you keep me in the loop?” She looks worriedly at Alex. “Tobin doesn’t like to talk when something’s going on, but you’re here and I’m not.” She lays a hand on Alex’s forearm, gripping it tightly, “And if you could let me know what’s going on, I’d really appreciate it.” “Yeah, sure,” Alex smiles, “I know it must be hard.” She feels for her, being separated from her best friend. They pull their phones out and exchange numbers. “We’ll get it all sorted out,” Jamie says reassuringly, “I’m sure it’s just a matter of blessing the place and that will be it.” Allie nods.“Will you and Karen come over to help?” Alex asks, “I think we could use you guys.” Jamie nods and takes another hit and passes it around. “Ready?” she grins. They head back in. “Tobin,” Karen says, standing with Syd, “it was inspired to use those tin ceiling tiles, they go so well.”“Thanks,” Tobin smiles, “I just stumbled across them and it hit me.” “I like how you used color in the panels on your TV cabinet to bring out the fireplace screen.” Karen says with a smile. “You would!” Syd exclaims, elbowing, “Tobin, did you know Karen made it?” “You did?” Tobin exclaims, “It’s awesome! I’m so happy to own one of your pieces!” “Thanks,” Karen says shyly, “it was pretty cool to make.” “Tobin here knows how to shop.” Syd informs Karen, “She came through my place and was, like, I like this, this and this.” She says dramatically, pointing her fingers at the sofa, the chairs and the table. “I wish all of my customers were so decisive.”Tobin blushes, “Syd,” she says, drawing out her name, “stop.” “I mean it!” Syd exclaims, grabbing Tobin’s arm. “What is going on here?” Alex questions, smiling and sliding her arm around Tobin’s waist. She’s just come back in from outside. “Karen made my fireplace screen,” Tobin says happily. “It’s wonderful!” Alex smiles at Karen. Karen nods and grins back at her. They hear a roar from across the room and then the chanting begins. “PT-FC!” the crowd of Tobin’s teammates begins. They all join in, clapping and chanting until Mark moves to the stairs and stands on the third step, looking over the crowd. “A toast to our hostess and owner of this beautiful home!” He shouts, as he raises his beer glass. His eyes find Tobin in the crowd and he grins at her. “May joy and peace surround you, contentment latch your door; and happiness be with you now, and bless you evermore.” Everyone takes a drink. “Speech! Speech! Speech!” the drunken soccer players chant. Tobin shakes her head as Allie pushes her towards the stairs. She slowly climbs to the fourth step. She sighs with a crooked smile as she looks at her friends, the noise quietening. Alex looks on with a smile on her face, Syd elbowing her. “Ah,” she says, running her hand through her hair, “you guys.” She smiles at her teammates. “Alright,” she takes a deep breath, “um, so this process to be standing here tonight has been one big gigantic surprise to me.” She says. “I never thought I’d be a homeowner. I really thought I’d get a condo or a townhouse, or something that didn’t have so much grass to mow.” They group chuckles with her. “But, it’s been, like, so easy, and it felt so right, from the minute I saw this place. And you guys coming over tonight to celebrate this with me, it means so much. Having you all here is like making this place officially a home now. Allie and Alex,” Tobin says, her eyes searching for them, “I couldn’t have done this without your help.” She pauses and then raises her glass, “So, thanks for coming, thanks for all of your help, and here’s to many more nights here, together, enjoying each other’s company!” “Here, here!” Sinc proclaims loudly as she takes a drink. Becky raises the music up, a faster paced song floating above the crowd. A group of players start singing and dancing and suddenly, the party is on another level. Tobin finds Alex and they dance, hands on each other, having a blast. “Whew!” Tobin exclaims, dropping down onto the couch next to Alex. It’s almost two in the morning, the guests have departed, many ordering Ubers to take their drunken asses home, the house has been mostly cleaned up. The leftovers are put away, the dirty plates and glasses stacked on the kitchen counter to be run through the dishwasher tomorrow. A load is in there now. “Tonight was a lot of fun,” Alex says, laying her hand on Tobin’s thigh and her head on her shoulder, “everyone is so cool.” Tobin turns her head towards her with a smile, “You were a big hit.” Alex blushes. “I think I might need to give you a commission on my book sales on Portland,” she says, pinching Tobin’s thigh. “Hey!” Tobin flinches, “It’s a good book!” she laughs. “I think my teammates will regret agreeing to do shots with Syd tomorrow morning.” She chuckles, shaking her head. “I should have told them she has a hollow leg.” Alex admits, “But they’ll learn their lesson, huh?” “Oh yeah!” Tobin laughs. Syd riled them up and soon they were toasting Tobin, the house, the Tiffany lamps, the window treatments and more. They’re both silent, smiles on their faces, remembering the night.Tobin eases her arm around Alex’s shoulders, Alex leaning in closer to her. “Thank you so much for everything you’ve done to help me make this night a success.” She says quietly, “I really appreciate it.” Alex tilts her head up to kiss her, “I had so much fun, sweetie.”Tobin smiles and leans in to kiss her again. Their kisses escalate, it’s as if they both know a barrier has been broken. They break apart and Tobin smiles, “I’m gonna lock up, okay?” Alex nods, “You ready to go to bed?” she asks quietly, seriously. There’s another meaning to those words. Tobin studies her intently, a slow smile spreading across her face in understanding, “I am.” She stands and extends her hand to help up from the couch. Alex heads towards the bedroom while Tobin goes to the front door, double checking that she’s closed the gate and turning on the alarm. She checks the back door as well and
then changes into a t-shirt and shorts before joining Alex in the bathroom to brush her teeth and take out her contacts. Tobin is in a t-shirt and shorts well, Alex eying her bare legs, appreciating her strong calves. Tobin catches her checking her out, smiling to herself as she continues to brush her teeth. When Alex is distracted taking her contacts out, Tobin looks her over. Alex’s arms are extended, making her shirt lift and expose her stomach. Tobin sees the definition, looking up to see her muscles moving under her shirt as she puts her lens in the container. They’re both hungry for each other. They lose their clothes quickly, shirts flinging to the floor, followed by shorts next. Hands are moving, their lips connected, exploring each other. Alex has pulled Tobin beneath her, panting as she looks down at her. “You’re so beautiful,” she murmurs, placing a light kiss on Tobin’s lips. She slowly moves to her neck, opening her mouth to suck on her heated skin. She works her way up to
Tobin’s ear, lazily tonguing it. Her right hand roams across Tobin’s chest, finding her left breast, palming it, squeezing it gently. She feels Tobin’s hips shift, feeling Tobin’s hands
lightly scratch her back softly with her short nails. Alex kisses her just below her ear, right at the joint of her jaw, that amazing jawline clenched rigid with pleasure making Tobin moan softly. Alex just couldn’t wait, even though she still needs to talk to Tobin about her abilities, as she calls them, she wants her now. “I want you so bad,” Alex growls, her voice low and raspy. Tobin arches her neck back, lightly humming, her hands now gripping Alex’s ass, squeezing and pressing their bodies together. Bare skin meeting bare skin. “I want you so bad, too,” Tobin whispers, moving her leg and suddenly flipping Alex and reversing their positions. “I want to touch you, can I touch you?” she whispers urgently, her leg now in between Alex’s, slowly moving rhythmically as her left hand traces her breast. “Yes,” Alex moans, “please,” she says wrapping her arms around Tobin’s back, her fingers splayed, feeling the definition of the muscles on her shoulders. Her hips begin moving, she raises her head to kiss Tobin deeply. She feels Tobin’s fingers leave her breast, pausing to circle on her stomach, igniting a fire of desire. Their tongues twist lazily, each feeling the hot breaths of air leaving through their noses as they resist from releasing another. They do break free, opening their eyes to stare at each other as Tobin now has her hand massaging Alex’s thigh. Tobin’s hips are moving in a rhythm, all of her movements coordinated, creating a build up of excitement and anticipation in Alex. She dips her head to bite at Alex’s neck, lightly nipping it and then sucking over it, trailing down to her shoulder, biting a little harder as her hand massages her more roughly. Their hips now move together, Alex is feeling Tobin’s wetness on her thigh, she knows she’s leaving a trail of her own on Tobin’s leg. Alex brings her hand to the back of Tobin’s head, pulling her in and forcefully kissing her, eliciting a moan from deep within Tobin’s throat that turns her on even more. Alex’s other hand finds Tobin’s breast, joining in the rhythmic dance, squeezing it to the beat Tobin sets. As Tobin’s hand snakes in between her legs, Alex can’t stop herself from spreading them wide in want and need. Tobin stops her assault on Alex’s shoulder to look up and see Alex’s ice blue eyes blazing at her lustfully. Their lips crash together as Tobin slowly runs two fingers through her folds, making Alex groan in pleasure. The pace picks up, Tobin’s hip gliding over her, fingers now circling her opening, then her clit, making Alex arch her back. “I wanna make you feel good,” Tobin whispers, her hot breath on Alex’s throat, placing feather light kisses along it. “Do it,” Alex urges as Tobin slowly slides a finger into her, pulsing forward with her hips, her leg driving it in deeper. Alex tosses her head back, a moan escaping her lips, her arms encircling Tobin, holding her close as she steadily moves in and out of her. Tobin adds another long finger, stroking her insides, finding that sweet spot that soon makes Alex gasp and moan every time she hits it. Alex’s hips are grinding up into Tobin’s, making Tobin moan as she continues to please her. Their breathing growing heavy, hot breath against each other. “Don’t stop,” Alex gasps, clutching at Tobin’s back, feeling the solid muscle under the smooth, soft skin, her strength making her feel safe. Tobin’s pace increases as she leans back a little, pumping her fingers into Alex, Alex, sliding her hands down to hold on to Tobin’s arms. Tobin slowly removes her fingers to circle her clit, watching as Alex comes undone, rising from the mattress, clutching her tightly, moaning loudly. Tobin falls forward, lying on Alex’s side, peppering her with kisses as she regains her breathing. She turns her head to face her, giving her a wide smile, “That was wonderful,” she says, her voice low. “Yeah?” Tobin questions, her eyebrows high. “Could you not tell?” Alex smirks at her, sending her a questioning look. Tobin drops her gaze from Alex’s eyes, “Well, you know, the first time and all,” she shrugs, feeling very unsure of herself right now. Alex turns to her side, reaching out and touching Tobin’s chin with two fingers, raising her head so she would look at her. “It was wonderful” she says, smiling at her, tilting her head, “and I’d really like to do it again.” She leans forward and kisses her, “But I want to make you feel good first,” she moves her hand to caress her jaw, “please don’t doubt yourself, it was perfect.” She gives her a reassuring smile. “It’s just been awhile,” Tobin’s quiet, low voice trails off. Alex let’s a out a short laugh, “Me too,” she grins, leaning forward to kiss her lips, she pushes Tobin’s shoulder back so she’s on her back, “so we’ll just have to do this a lot and get back in the groove.” “Is that right?” Tobin questions with a smile, feeling immensely relieved. “Oh yeah!” Alex laughs as she slides her body onto Tobin’s, “Buckle up, Click, you’re in for a ride.” The other night when Alex was over, they were lounging on the couch watching TV. Tobin was searching through the channels at lightning speed, clicking the remote so rapidly Alex couldn’t make out what station she was passing. She teased her relentlessly about it, adopting the new nickname for her. Click. Their mouths find each other, Alex hungrily tasting Tobin, sucking on her tongue, pulling back and biting her lower lip, pulling a fraction away with it in her teeth. She releases it to begin kissing her neck, she’s worked up, she wants her badly, she just wants to take her. She’s massaging her breast, her fingers alternating between squeezing it and taking her nipple with her fingers rolling it, lightly twisting it. Teasing her. “Lex!” Tobin whines, needing more, “Please!” she urges. Alex slowly beings to work her way down, kissing her throat, working down between her breasts, her hands slowly rubbing her sides. She takes a breast in her mouth, sucking lightly, swirling her tongue around her nipple, making Tobin moan and press her chest up against her. Alex can feel Tobin running her fingers through her hair as she slowly leaves her breast, licking and sucking on her abdominals, she can feel and hear the gasp and hitch in Tobin’s breath as she kisses her inner thigh. She massages her muscular thighs, inhaling the scent of her, her nose and mouth only inches away from Tobin’s center. She leans in to meet Tobin’s rising hips, taking a long, slow lick against her slickness, hearing Tobin cry out in pleasure. She twists her tongue around her clit, teasing it before taking it in her mouth and sucking it. “Mmmm,” Tobin moans, arching her back, gripping the sheets, raising her head, looking down and seeing the top of Alex’s head as she digs her heels in the mattress. Alex slides lower, circling her opening, tasting her sweetness, plunging her tongue into her, fucking her. “Oh!” Tobin exclaims, her hips rising to create a rhythm and meet Alex’s thrusts. Alex removes her tongue, sliding back through her folds, sucking on her clit, her teeth raking against it, a finger gently prodding and sliding into Tobin. She curls her fingers, finding the spot that sends Tobin off the mattress, crying out loudly, making her gasp and pant. “Lex!” Tobin cries as her hips buck and her legs twitch. Alex adds a second finger and it takes only a moment for Tobin to let loose with a strangled cry, going completely stiff for a few seconds before tumbling back to the mattress, breathing hard. Alex wipes her face with the back of her hand, discreetly wiping it on the sheets before slowly looking up and seeing Tobin, panting wildly, her body covered in a sheen of sweat, arms out, hands still gripping the sheets. She moves next to her, feeling Tobin place her arm around her as she rests her head on Tobin’s still rapidly rising and falling chest. She smirks to her herself, proud that she got Tobin off. She trails her hand along Tobin’s protruding hip, her stomach, feeling those incredible muscles, moving up to cup her breast in her hand. Tobin turns her head and places a kiss on Alex’s temple, her eyes fluttering open as her breathing slows down. “That was,” she says, clearing her dry throat, “that was wonderful.” “Yeah?” Alex asks, looking up at her and meeting Tobin’s dark eyes. Tobin nods and gives her a wide smile, “You don’t have to worry about getting in a groove,” she chuckles, pulling Alex closer. “Neither do you, Click.” Alex replies as she shifts her hips, turning to her side and hooking her leg in between Tobin’s still out spread ones. Tobin lets out a deep sigh, “I missed doing that,” she says, kissing the top of Alex’s head. “Me too,” Alex hums, feeling happy and content. Exhausted from the long day and the late hour, they both fall asleep quickly.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
December 19, 2017 Alex wakes to feeling Tobin leaving the bed, thinking she’s using the bathroom, Alex just turns over and settles on her side, sleep finding her again. They’ve just had a marathon round of sex after spending the evening at Tobin’s, completing the house cleansing and later celebrating their own Christmas together before Tobin leaves tomorrow. She wakes some time later, seeking Tobin’s warmth, extending her hand over and not feeling her. She cracks an eye open, seeing the bed is empty. She sits up, glancing at the clock on the nightstand, seeing it register as two-thirty in the morning. She hears a sharp intake of breath, moving her head to the noise, seeing Tobin standing naked, facing the corner of the room, her hands covering her head, as if protecting herself from being hit. “Tobin?” she calls, concerned. “Aaahh! Stop!” Tobin mumbles, flinching her back as if struck by something, her shoulder bouncing against the wall. Alex realizes Tobin’s crying and immediately leaves the bed to stand next to her. She gently lays her hand on Tobin’s shoulder, “Babe?” she questions. She feels anger in the air, but she’s tired and can’t sense it clearly. Tobin looks at her fearfully, her eyes wide, breathing heavy. Alex sees she’s still asleep, trapped in her dream, “It’s okay,” she coos, taking her ice cold arm and slowly leading her back to bed. Tobin is shaking as she lets Alex guide her to the bed, slowly getting under the covers. “You’re alright, it’s okay,” Alex says softly, “go to sleep.” She wraps Tobin in her arms, concerned about what she’s just witnessed. She feels Tobin shivering and then slowly settle, her body losing the rigidity and relaxing in her arms. Earlier tonight after dinner, Syd, Karen, Jamie, Tobin and herself had completed the cleansing on the house, ushering a few spirits from the premises. They used oils over the doors and windows, blessed the house in the name of God and issued and an order of protection over those who lived here. They all felt a lightness pervade the home, making them feel they were successful. Tobin was openminded during the whole process, Jamie explaining as the new homeowner, it was her place to order the spirits to leave. Tobin had done so, politely but firmly telling them to leave this place and cross over. Alex watched, her mouth slowly opening in wonder as she saw the stream of spirits, exiting the house through the newly opened turret door. Opening the turret door was an experience in itself. Entering the door, a small landing was there, crammed with furniture, boxes, and a deep sense of residual sadness, anger and loneliness. Alex couldn’t wait to go through the items up there. It was an emotional night, Jamie’s brother showing himself in the basement, he was indeed, the man from the very first article Alex found about the house. He stayed with them until the very end, smiling as he thanked them all for releasing him. Of course, Syd, Tobin and Karen couldn’t see or hear him, but they remained respectfully silent, watching the emotional scene play out in front of them. Alex had kept herself close in check, not wanting to reveal right then that she was able to see the spirits. She knew it was apparent to the others she could feel something, but she didn’t want to let it slip that she was outright seeing them. Jamie was more forthcoming, speaking out to them, guiding them through the process. When they finished the cleansing, they all had a drink in the living room, Jamie and Alex explaining it as best they could without actually telling them they could see the spirits. Jamie and Alex had discussed it ahead of time, neither wanting to overtly tip their hands just yet. Both liked to keep their abilities quiet, knowing how uncomfortable it could be. Tobin agreed that she felt a difference in the house, that it felt lighter, and happier. They left it at that, both Jamie and Alex feeling they had done a good job, but neither feeling completely positive everyone was gone. Alex had let Ellie, the young chambermaid stay, the young girl was terrified of crossing over, promising to be quiet and only help when asked. The bootlegger stayed, just wanting to stick around until Alex could find his body to put him to rest. There were a few others who fled as soon as they started the cleansing, but they didn’t know if they crossed or just left. It was hard to tell. Alex hears Tobin whimper as she shifts in her arms, sniffling as she buries her head into her pillow, making Alex hold her tighter until she quieted. December 20, 2018 “What time’s your flight?” Alex asks as Tobin slides a plate in front of her. “Eleven,” Tobin replies, returning to the table with her own plate. It’s early and Alex is dressed and ready for work, Tobin insisted in making her breakfast before she left. “I’ll be home on Thursday, the twenty-eighth,” she continues as she cuts into her omelet with her fork. “Then you leave on New Year’s Day, right?” Alex asks as she finishes chewing. Tobin nods. “I might be in LA while you’re out there,” she continues, “I may have a meeting and I’m trying to schedule it on a Friday so I can see my folks again.” “Oh yeah?” Tobin’s face brightens, looking up at her. “Yeah,” Alex smiles, “I was wondering if we could meet up if my plans work out.” Tobin nods her head vigorously. “Absolutely!” She exclaims, smiling at her. “What’s bringing you to LA?” she questions, her curiosity getting to her. “Ah,” she says, “I’m finalizing a deal with my book.” “A deal?” Tobin tilts her head, not understanding. “A movie deal,” Alex clarifies. “They’re making your book into a movie?” Tobin asks slowly, her eyes wide. Alex nods. “Honey, that’s amazing!” Tobin exclaims, pushing back from her chair and leaning to hug her. “That’s, like, super awesome!” Alex grins at her, glad to share the excitement. “Yeah, it’s been a long time coming, but it’s finally going to happen.” “I’m so proud of you!” Tobin says, kissing her cheek, “that is so rad!” They grin at each other. “I’ll let you know when they confirm it, okay?” Alex comments. “Yeah, that will be great!” Tobin smiles. Alex watches her smile falter. “Uh, would it be cool if you met my Mom and maybe my sister?” “I would love to,” Alex says, reaching her hand over to squeeze Tobin’s. Tobin lets out a sigh, “Whew,” she says, “I thought maybe it would be too soon, or, like, maybe you wouldn’t, or” she’s rambling. “It’s fine,” Alex insists, “I would really like to meet them.” She smiles at her. “Oh good,” Tobin smiles back, “’cause I’d really like them to meet you.” When Alex is just about done with her second cup of coffee, she looks over at Tobin. “Babe?” she asks. “What, hon?” Tobin replies as she lifts the last forkful of her eggs to her mouth. “Do you remember getting out of bed last night?” Alex questions. Tobin tilts her head at her, chewing her food, confusion evident of her face. “I did?” Alex nods. “Yeah, you did.” She confirms. “At first, I thought you just got up to use the bathroom,” she says, “but then, I woke up later and you were still gone.” Tobin leans back in her chair, scrunching her face, trying to remember. Her mind’s drawing a blank. It’s upsetting. “Where was I?” she questions, her voice a whisper, her face paling. Alex swivels in her chair, her hand finding Tobin’s, feeling how cold it is. She rubs it with both of her hands. “You were standing in the corner of the room,” she explains. “I was?” Tobin’s voice trembles, tears threatening to fall.“You don’t remember why you were there?” Alex asks gently, still rubbing Tobin’s hand. “No,” Tobin shakes her head, “What the fuck?” she says, clearly upset. She raises her other hand and wipes her eyes under her glasses. Alex knows she’s upset, the cursing only confirming it. “It’s okay,” Alex comforts, “maybe yesterday was more emotional than you thought, doing the house cleansing, you know?” Tobin only nods, her face a study of concentration and confusion. “How about when you get back, we put a camera in your room to see what you do when you sleep?” Alex asks, “Maybe that will help figure out what’s going on.” “Yeah, maybe,” Tobin says slowly, “when I go for my surgery, I should talk to my doctor.” She sighs, “Maybe this is why I’m so tired all the time,” she says softly. “Hey,” Alex says, shaking her hand a little, “it will be okay.” Tobin gives her a crooked smile, “Yeah,” she nods, “it will.” “Don’t be too upset about it, okay?” Alex says, glancing at the clock on the microwave, “We’ll figure it out, you’ll be okay.” she tries to sound comforting and assuring. “Yeah,” Tobin nods again, looking over to the clock as well, “you should head out,” They stand and Alex gathers her bags as she hugs Tobin. “You have a great Christmas with your family.” She says as she leans in to kiss her. “You too,” Tobin replies, kissing her back. She gives her a smile, “I’m so excited about your movie deal.” She says, “We’ll have to celebrate.” Alex grins at her, “When you come back, you can wine and dine me.” She wiggles her eyebrows. “Sounds good,” Tobin says, hugging her again. “Have a good day, okay?” Alex nods, “Text me when you land.” “For sure,” Tobin grins, watching her leave. She remains in the doorway until Alex’s car disappears at the corner of her block. Still troubled from Alex telling her she was out of bed and standing in the corner, Tobin slowly walks back in the kitchen, absentmindedly cleaning up the breakfast dishes. She really can’t remember what was happening, only having a feeling that she was being yelled at and someone was hitting her with something. Worried she was being to show signs of her previous anxiety issues, she sits on her couch and calls the one person who could calm her. “Mom?” she says, her voice trembling when the call is answered. Tobin barely makes her flight, staying on the phone with her Mom for far too long, not realizing she was cutting it so close. She falls asleep quickly in the plane, leaning against the window, her jacket a pillow, drooling on it. She feels the jolt of the landing, waking her, her head popping up, disoriented, taking a moment to remember where she was flying to. She collects her backpack, still feeling sleepy, grabs her coat and heads off, knowing exactly where the baggage claim is in this airport. Her Mom is there to greet her, hugging her tightly, holding her jacket while she gets her bag. The car ride is quiet, commenting on the weather, talking about the new businesses in the area, her Mom being careful with her. Anxious Tobin is a different character from normal Tobin. She bounces from laid back to intense, from happy to sullen. When she had her difficulties in college, her Mom worried greatly about her, comforted by Tobin’s coach Anson and his reassurances she was getting the help she needed. What worries her now is that Tobin has to do this on her own, there’s no coach to make sure she goes to a therapist, no teammates around right now making sure she eats and takes her medication. The college setting is much more different than the professional one. Her Mom isn’t sure if Tobin is that far along that she needs all of this, but she clearly isn’t in a good place at the moment. When they get to the house, Tobin takes her hand, looking over at her. “Mom, can we not have a big discussion about this here?” she asks, suddenly feeling embarrassed from her earlier confessional phone call, “Like, I might bring it up, but I’m not sure right now. I’m going to talk to my doctor next week about this and see what she thinks, okay?” “I’m only going to agree because I’ll be there with you,” her Mom answers, “if you don’t bring it up then, I will. Sweetie, I just don’t want this to spiral into something more serious.” Tobin nods, “I know,” she says, “I don’t either,” she agrees, “when Alex told me that this morning, it freaked me out. But I want to address it next week, okay? Let the team doctor help me deal with it.” Her Mom nods, then smiles and points at her. “You will have to tell us all about Alex though,” she says, grabbing her purse and opening the car door, “there’s no avoiding that.” “Gladly!” Tobin laughs, getting out of the vehicle. Her nephew ambushes her as soon as she enters, laughing and yelling at her to pick him up. She sees her sisters and their husbands and her brother and smiles, grateful to be with her family. Alex smiles when she sees the text from Tobin along with a photo of palm trees. She replies with a photo of the empty second floor at the Historical Society, stating she can’t wait to leave tomorrow to see her family. She sends her a second photo of her hand holding the expensive pen Tobin gave her last night as Christmas present. It writes amazingly smooth, gripping the paper the beautifully. Two weeks ago, Alex had complained about how she hates the cheap pens at work because they skip and she doesn’t like how they feel when she makes her notes. Tobin had teased her about it, until Alex compared her writing to Tobin wearing her boots for soccer and how would she feel if they didn’t fit correctly. Tobin politely apologized, snaking her hand under Alex’s sweater, gripping her breast and telling her she’d make it up to her. Tobin’s expression when she opened her gift was priceless, her eyes growing large, a smile filling her face. Alex had gotten her an expensive leather work belt with a hammer hanger and pouches for tools and nails and whatever she needed. Tobin loved it, claiming she was always having to carry everything around while she was working on the house and needed something exactly like this. She kissed her passionately, telling her it was such a thoughtful gift, her sincerity pouring out and comforting Alex who had sudden last minute nerves about giving it to her. Tobin is in bed for the night in the guest room, wondering how Alex is, so she grabs her phone. Click: You up? Lex: YepShe FaceTimes her. “Hey, babe,” Alex answers a smile on her face. She squints to see Tobin, “you in bed?” “Yeah, just laying here,” Tobin replies, “not feeling super tired right now. But I wanted to hear your voice and see your face.” She smiles at her. Alex frowns, “Well, I love hearing your voice, too, but I can’t see your face.” Tobin reaches for the light on the side table. “Better?” she smiles at her. “Much.” Alex smiles. “How was your first day?” “It was so nice, my nephews are getting so big, they’re so cute,” Tobin gushes, “we had a really fun dinner and then just sat around and caught up.” “That’s nice,” Alex replies smiling at her, “do you have plans for tomorrow or do you guys just hang out?” Tobin shrugs, “I think we’re going to go to the beach for awhile tomorrow,” she says, “we’ll see if it’s sunny and warm enough. What do you guys do when your family is together?” “Well,” Alex grins, “usually the first night we relax and visit but then the next day we go to the Winter Fest and ice skate and have dinner there.” “Winter Fest?” Tobin questions, “Where’s that?” “In my hometown, Diamond Bar,” Alex answers, “it has stalls of vendors, games and there’s music in the beer tent and there’s just tons of stuff to do.” “That sounds super cool,” Tobin enthuses, “we used to have something like that back in Jersey,” she says, “it’s different now, here in Florida, though.” She finishes quietly. Alex sighs, leaning back on her sofa, “Must be hard when things change like that,” she says softly. Tobin glances towards the door of the guest room, “Yeah, I mean, my parents got divorced when I was in college, but sometimes, it just,” she shrugs, speaking quietly, “I don’t know, it’s just like it’s new sometimes, you know? Like, it’s been almost ten years, but we haven’t created any new traditions down here.” “Well,” Alex says slowly, “maybe you could research some stuff and suggest checking it out? Do you think they’d go for it if you did that?” “Maybe,” Tobin admits, “why didn’t I think of this?” “Because you didn’t have me to suggest it,” Alex smirks at her. Tobin drops her eyes, biting her lower lip, a sign to Alex that she’s thinking about what she’s going to say before she speaks, she waits quietly. “Is it too soon to say that I wish you were here with me?” she asks quietly, looking up at her intently. Alex smiles at her, “Not at all,” she replies, “I know I’ll miss seeing your face when I’m with my family.” Tobin smiles at her. “Are we going to go to Syd’s for New Years?” she asks her. “I’d like to, do you?” Alex replies and asks her. “Yeah, I think it will be fun,” Tobin grins, “Syd’s a blast and Dom is slightly crazy.” Alex nods and laughs, “They’re made for each other.” “I really like the idea of giving you a New Years kiss.” Tobin’s voice drops lower, eying her. “I do, too,” Alex replies, just as seductively. Tobin yawns, shaking her head, “Sorry,” “That’s fine, it’s getting late there, you should go to bed.” Alex suggests. Tobin scrunches her face at Alex again, “I told my Mom about my sleep issues,” she admits quietly, “I called her after you left this morning.” “Oh,” Alex sits upright, looking at her, trying to read Tobin’s expression, “what did she say?” Tobin sighs, “Well, I think she thinks I’m having a crisis of some sort,” she admits, “she didn’t say it, but I know she’s worried. I asked her not say anything about it, I’ll talk to my doctor next week.” Alex nods, “I know that feeling,” she says, “after my car crash in college, my Mom was always hovering over me.” Alex knows her Mother had good reason to, they all thought Alex had lost her mind, talking about seeing people who weren’t there and talking to them. “Yeah?” Tobin encourages, she wants to know more.“Yeah,” Alex nods, “I was,” she sighs, “I was pretty messed up after my surgeries, and they thought I kind of was out of my mind for a little while.”Tobin slides up on the bed, stuffing a pillow behind her back, “Babe, what happened?” she asks, her voice concerned. Alex waves her off, “It was a traumatic crash, one of my best friends died in it and I wasn’t dealing well with that at all. A drunk driver hit us. She had no chance.” “Oh, honey, I’m so sorry,” Tobin says, the inflection of her voice telling Alex just how sincere she is. “Yeah, it was bad, and it messed me up,” Alex says, “but it happened and I got through it.”“That had to be awful,” Tobin whispers, “I’m so sorry.” Alex gives her a soft smile, “It’s okay, thanks sweetie,” She sees Tobin struggle against yawning again, “You should go to sleep,” “But I want to talk to you,” Tobin whines slightly, pouting at her, looking sleepy. “We can talk tomorrow, and I’ll be sure to send you some videos from Winter Fest.” Alex promises. Tobin nods, sliding back down under the covers, “Okay,” she says, her voice tired, “I’m going to look for stuff to do around here. I like that idea.” “Good,” Alex smiles at her, “sleep tight, stay in your bed,” she smirks. “Smartass,” Tobin grumbles with a smile, “you too, I’ll talk to you soon,” “Goodnight, babe.” “Goodnight.” Tobin says, yawning as she ends the call. December 23, 2017 Tobin smiles taking a photo with her nephew at the Winter Carnival she found and convinced the others to attend. She’s wearing shorts and a Snoopy Christmas t-shirt, her hair pulled back and sunglasses on, laughing as her nephew kisses her cheek. It’s still weird to her that she’s celebrating Christmas and there’s no snow. She sends it to Alex, with a short message thanking her again for suggesting an outing with her family. Alex replies with heart emojis telling her about how adorable her nephew is. They’ve been going back and forth these last few days, talking when they can, texting mostly. Tobin’s been feeling great, sleeping soundly and not having any issues during the night. Her sisters keep teasing her about Alex, asking to see photos, threatening to steal her phone so they can call her. It’s all in good fun, but they also ask serious questions about her, Perry is reading her book and just loves it. When Tobin suggests hosting a holiday, she’s greeted with surprised faces. “Really, Tobs?” Katie questions, “You want to host, like, Easter or Thanksgiving or something?” “Yeah, I do.” Tobin smiles at them. “I can handle it.” “I don’t doubt you can,” her Mom smiles, “let’s work out the holidays and see what makes the most sense.” “Tobin, you better just not serve, like, pizza and beer,” her brother teases. “Only for you,” Tobin sticks out her tongue at him. “Kids,” their Mom utters, as she pulls up her calendar on her phone. They huddle around and soon Tobin ends up with hosting Easter. “I demand an Egg Hunt.” Jeffrey states loudly. “I’ll hide you an egg,” Tobin threatens, smirking at him. “Kids,” their Mom’s voice floats back as she leaves the room, “be nice.” They all laugh, Perry teasing Jeffrey about what holiday he’s going to host. “Tobs, are you coming back to LA with us from here?” Perry asks, pouring another glass of wine. It’s late and the kids are all in bed, leaving the adults to hang out. “Uhm no,” Tobin shakes her head, “I’m going home and then to LA on New Year’s Day.” She sees her Mom looking expectantly at her. She smiles, “Alex and I are doing New Year’s Eve together.” “Who’s Alex?” Jeffrey asks, eyes narrowing. “Tobin’s new girlfriend,” Perry nods smugly, wiggling her eyes. Jeffrey sends her an expectant look, raising his eyebrows. Tobin sighs, “I met her at the Historical Society, she’s researching my house and we hit it off and are seeing each other now.” “Is she hot?” he asks facetiously, grinning at her. “Shut up, you idiot!” Perry smacks him. Tobin opens her phone and finds a photo of Alex and smugly hands it over to him. “Holy shit!” he mutters, handing the phone back, “Nice catch, sis!” he says.“You’re an ass,” Tobin says, hitting him in the back of the head as she goes to get another drink. December 25, 2017 Tobin is up, sending out holiday texts. Her nephews aren’t awake yet, she might be the only one up and it’s nearing ten o’clock. Everyone else is grateful to be sleeping in. She had gotten up, used the bathroom and came back to bed to make her texts. Harry#2: Merry Christmas Al! Harry#1: Merry Christmas, babe! Having a good one? Harry#2: Yeah, it’s been a blast so far. You?Harry #1: same. Miss your face. Let’s talk tomorrow? Harry#2: sure thing, tell Riceman I say hey and Merry Christmas! Harry#1: Love you! Harry#2: Love you too! She texts Lauren, Amy, Kelley and others before joining into the Thorns group chat sending her holiday wishes and the National Team chat as well. She texts Alex next. Click: Merry Christmas, babe! Lex: Merry Christmas! You’re up early! Click: wanted to catch you before your day got busy. Lex: well thanks, sweetie, are you just snuggling in bed still or are you up?Click: in bed, missing you. Lex: well, I’m sitting here, in just a t-shirt, sipping mimosa thinking about how sexy you are. Click: babe, we are not sexting on Christmas morning, okay?Lex: well, I guess I’ll just have to take care of myself. Click: Lex! C’mon! Lex: just messing with you. I’m fully dressed, still thinking about how sexy you are, but my Mom is across the table as we drink mimosas. She’s reading the paper. Click: that’s more like it. Lex: you better sleep on the plane, because you won’t get any sleep once I get my hands on you on the 28thClick: thanks for the heads up. You were reading my mind. Hope you don’t have to work the 29th Lex: already took it off. Click:I’m going to go take a cold shower now, have a great day babeLex: ummm, shower Click: LEX! Lex: LOL! Have a great day with your family sweetie- TTYLTobin sets her phone down next to her, turning on her side, thinking she could get another hour before the house starts waking. She drifts off to sleep. The kids make them laugh as they tear into their gifts. Well, Cole does, the twins are too young to open anything yet. He loves the blocks Tobin got him, insisting they open the package so he can play with them right then, uninterested in any other presents at the moment. It makes Tobin feel good that she got him something he digs so much and without Katie telling her what would be a good gift. Jeffrey elbows sharply, “Did you bribe him or something?” he asks with a smirk. Tobin shrugs, grinning back at him, “Nah, I’m just in tune with my nephew,” she says airily, enjoying getting a dig in. “Figures,” he mutters, “you act like a three year old, you’d know exactly what he’d want.” He’s grinning as he says it, teasing. That earns him a slap in the back of the head from their Mother who is walking behind the couch with her second cup of coffee. “Children,” she warns with a smirk. Tobin stifles a laugh, getting cheesy grins from Perry and Katie as Jeffrey pouts. The adults drew names for a grab bag, Tobin drawing her Mom. They had done it in the summer, so they had plenty of time to get the perfect gift. Tobin gave her a gift card to purchase a new set of golf clubs and some lessons at her course. She had been really getting into golf, complaining to Tobin that her clubs were holding her back. She also gave her three small paintings she had made while she was rehabbing her back. They were her favorite flowers in small frames and Tobin thought they would look perfect on her small wall next to her breakfast nook. Her Mom loved them, immediately saying she knew exactly where she would hang them. Right by the breakfast nook. She was so excited, once again telling Tobin she should be an artist after her playing days were over. Jeffrey teased her that she should be the one to hang the paintings, seeing as she’s Miss DIY with the house stuff. Tobin just smiled, feeling proud to earn the title. Jeffrey changed his attitude into seriousness and nervousness when it was Tobin’s turn to open the gift he gave her. He leans forward in his seat next to her, eagerly watching her. “Dude!” Tobin exclaims, pulling the rest of the sloppy wrapping paper from the book, looking carefully at the cover. It’s a book about making furniture complete with diagrams and instructions. “This is so rad!” Tobin shakes her head. “Open the next one,” he urges, handing it to her, “you’re gonna love it.” He’s grinning like crazy. Tobin opens the next package, the cover revealing another book on furniture making. This one is for making bar carts, yard furniture, shelving units, wall shelves and other accessories. “Dude, thank you so much!” She turns to hug him, “I love it, this is so sweet!” “Turn the book over, dude,” he says softly. Tobin eyes him as she turns the book over. There’s a small envelop taped to it. She opens it. “Oh, man,” she whispers, “Jeff!” she hugs him again. “This is so awesome!” “I remembered how cool you thought this place was when we went there the last time I visited.” He says, his eyes glistening, “I’m so happy with you getting that house and everything you’re doing to it. I’m so proud of you, sis.” He sniffles, hugging her again. “Thanks, bro,” Tobin says into his neck, holding him tightly, “I love you.” “Love you, too.” He says as they both sniffle loudly, the rest of the group looking on speechless. They pull away, both wiping their eyes, smiling at each other. “Well?” Katie bursts out, “What did he give you?” “These two books on furniture making,” Tobin happily replies, passing them to Perry, “and a gift card to this awesome reclaimed wood and building store in Portland.” “Oh, honey!” Their Mom says, “How thoughtful,” Tobin smiles at Jeff, “This is pretty sweet, thanks so much bro.” “I only ask that you make me something cool,” he answers smiling just as wide at her. “You got it.” Tobin nods and they fist bump. “And not kick his ass in Mario cart this visit!” Katie laughs.The rest of the day is wonderful, later in the afternoon, while others are napping, Tobin finds herself out on the patio, one of her new books in hand, leafing through it looking at the possibilities. She finds the directions are very straight forward. In the introduction, there’s a cool section explaining the different types of wood to use for building furniture. She finds it incredibly interesting, learning about the different wood densities, how they take stain, how some can be bent. She’s so lost in the book, she doesn’t hear Perry come out, sitting down next to her. “Hey,” Perry nudges her. “What’s up?” Tobin looks up from the book. “What’s going on with you?” Perry asks, looking at her intently, “You look exhausted. Are you having trouble sleeping?” Tobin looks at her, meeting her concerned gaze. “Yeah, I’m having some problems,” she admits, “I’ve been sleepwalking, having trouble sleeping, I don’t know.” She shrugs. “Tobs,” Perry says gently, laying her hand on her shoulder. “I’m talking to my doctor in LA next week.” Tobin cuts her off, “If I need to, I can talk to the Thorns team psychologist.” “Okay,” Perry nods, “okay, that’s good that you’re going to talk to your doctor.” “Yeah,” Tobin scratches the back of her neck, “I don’t want it to get out of hand.” Perry gives her a side hug, “If you need to anything, just call me, okay? I’m here for you.” Tobin nods. “So, how’s the book?” Perry asks, gesturing to it. “It’s fantastic!” Tobin grins, “I love it.” They chat easily, Tobin showing her some of the designs of bed frames that caught her eye. She’s thinking she just might try to make the furniture for the guest rooms. December 27, 2018 “I’ll pick you up,” Alex offers, “I don’t want to wait to see you.” “You don’t have to,” Tobin argues, “I can Uber to your place.” “Nope.” Alex shakes her head, “I’m picking you up and taking you back to my house and having my way with you.” “Oooh,” Tobin coos, “I like the sound of that,” she grins. “You better sleep on the plane because you won’t get much rest once I get my hands on you.” Alex informs her, “I have plans for you.” Her voice lowers, running her tongue across her lips. She sees Tobin looking at her, biting her lower lip, gazing at her. “I want you so bad,” she says, her voice low and throaty, “you are so fucking hot.” “Oh yeah?” Alex questions, a gleam in her eye, “Hot, huh?” Tobin nods, “We’re not doing phone sex, you, so lay off, babe.” She laughs. “You’re such a prude,” Alex frowns, teasing her. “I’m not a prude,” Tobin shakes her head, “I’m just not doing this with you, not here.” “Oh!” Alex exclaims loudly, “No phone sex when you’re at your Mom’s, I get it.” She says loudly. “Sssshhh!” Tobin fumbles her phone, “Lex!” she hisses. Tobin can’t see her face because she’s still fumbling to get her phone off the ground but she can clearly her laughter. When she picks it up to look at her, she sees her smiling at her. “Aw, babe, I’m just teasing,” she says. “Yeah, you are,” Tobin agrees, “and I’m going to have to take a cold shower.” “We could take a shower together tomorrow,” Alex offers, smirking at her. “Could you turn it down a notch?” Tobin questions, “There are ears everywhere here, I swear.” She says in a hushed tone. She’s sitting in the living room, while her sisters are in the kitchen. “Text me your flight number, sweetheart,” Alex states with a giggle, “and I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?” “Thanks, babe,” Tobin smiles, “I can’t wait to see you.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
December 28, 2017 Tobin gives Alex a quick kiss and long hug at baggage claim. Alex senses Tobin doesn’t exactly want to shower her with kisses while they are in public and she’s fine with that. Especially when she spies out of the corner of her eye, a group of teens filming them. She breaks away, smiling at her, “Your fans are lurking,” she murmurs, grabbing Tobin’s jacket as they head to the carousel to get her bag. Tobin gives her a startled look, “We didn’t talk about this, I’m sorry,” she says apologetically. “I guess I can keep my hands off your ass and my tongue in my mouth until we get back to my place,” she sighs at her with a grin. Tobin just stops, giving her a look Alex doesn’t understand. “What?” “I’m really sorry,” Tobin says, looking upset, “I didn’t even think to talk about how out we wanted to be,” “Relax, babe,” Alex, wanting to hug her but restraining herself, “I’m okay with this, I understand. I’m not exactly a big fan of PDA either.” “You sure?” Tobin questions, staring at her. Alex looks over Tobin’s shoulder and sees her bag pass by, one of only two bags on the carousel now, she nods. “I am.” She says with a nod, “really.” Tobin sighs, “Babe,” Alex smiles at her, “Your bag is coming,” she points, “let’s get out of here.” Tobin quickly grabs her suitcase. Alex hands Tobin her jacket and Tobin slides off her backpack and shrugs it on. She gets her backpack back on, insisting she has it. “I mean, like, at a restaurant or a bar or something, it’s fine, but like, airports,” Tobin rambles, “there’s something about airports and people hanging around and filming me, I just don’t get it. It's creepy. I mean, fans are cool, but these are like, stalkers, you know?” She’s talking too fast but she can’t stop herself, she feels the need to apologize again. “It’s not that I’m embarrassed by you, please, Lord, don’t ever think that, or ashamed of my sexuality, I just, I just, like to be private about my private life, you know? Some of the fans and these stalkers types, they just take and take and take whatever they can get and then it’s all over everywhere and people are talking and” “Tobin!” Alex says abruptly, making Tobin flinch next to her as they walk in through the dimly lit parking lot to the car. “Just take a breath, please.” She says quietly. “You didn’t do anything wrong and I’m not upset about this, okay?” Tobin is silent with her head down as she walks. Alex elbows her. “Okay?” “Okay,” Tobin says quietly. Tobin puts her bag and backpack in the trunk, settling into the passenger seat. “I didn’t get to tell you how hot you look in that outfit,” Alex smirks, laying her hand on Tobin’s thigh. “This?” Tobin asks, her forehead crinkling as she looks down at her sweatpants and hoodie. “Uh huh,” Alex arches her eyebrow at her, giving her a smirk, “you know what that means, don’t you?” She begins to massage Tobin’s thigh. She’s driving with one hand on the wheel as she merges into the expressway traffic.“No, what?” Tobin questions, wondering where’s she’s going with this. “Easy access,” Alex says wiggling her eyebrows and smirking as she slips her hand under the elastic waistband, her fingers softly finding Tobin’s center. “Lex!” Tobin exclaims, gasping with surprise. “Just lean back, relax, and enjoy the ride,” Alex grins, wiggling her eyebrows at her. She feels Tobin shift her hips, spreading her legs apart as Alex trails two fingers around her clit. Tobin let’s out a shaky breath, slouching back in her seat, her hands on her knees, clutching them tightly. Alex continues softly and slowly playing with her clit, one hand on the steering wheel, paying attention to the road. She feels Tobin’s growing slickness, letting her fingers play in it, quickening her pace. Tobin’s hips begin to move, her head back, eyes closed, breathing loudly out through her mouth. Alex slides her fingers through her folds, seeking her opening, slipping a finger in her, slowly moving forward and back. “Lex,” Tobin gasps, her voice a pitch higher than normal. Alex quickens her pace, thrusting into her and then adding a second finger, curling her fingers as she retreats. Tobin is now panting, her hips shifting and angling towards her on the side, spreading her right leg out, giving Alex better access. Tobin’s breathing is erratic as she slouches in her seat, trying to give Alex better access. Her head is pushed back against the headrest, leaning towards Alex, her left hand moved to grip the middle console, knuckles white. Her right hand holding onto the grab bar with all of her strength. “Oh, God,” she calls out, “yes, don’t stop!” she urges, her hips rising to meet Alex’s thrusts. Her legs quaking, her hips bucking, straining against her seatbelt, she suddenly jerks forward, chin to chest, gasping, emitting a breathless groan as the rush of her orgasm overtakes her. She melts back into her seat, her hand dropping from the grab bar to fall carelessly on her leg. Eyes closed, she’s breathing heavy, the sounds of her panting filling the car. Alex wipes her fingers against Tobin’s underwear, withdrawing her hand and glancing over at her. “Okay, babe?” she questions, a grin on her face. “Oh man,” Tobin says, her breathing slowing down, “that was intense.” She looks at her, “You’re something else,” she grins. Alex grins back at her, “I couldn’t wait.” She shrugs. “Well, thanks!” Tobin laughs, straightening up in her seat. They pull in to Alex’s driveway. Alex looks at her, “I’m not through with you just yet,” she smirks as she exits the car, leaving Tobin sitting in her seat, unsure if she can even walk yet. Tobin does make it into Alex’s house on unsteady legs where Alex strips her naked in the living room, leading her to her bedroom, taking her again. Tobin takes her time, teasing Alex until she’s almost crying, begging for release. She then surprises her by going again quickly, making her come even harder the second time. They lay side by side, breathless as they both come down from their efforts, fingers intertwined. “Now that was a welcome home,” Tobin grins at her, elbowing Alex. Alex brings two fingers to her chin, tapping on it gently, “Hmmm,” she says, thinking of something. “What?” Tobin asks. “I’m trying to think of the appropriate way to celebrate when you start scoring goals when you’re playing this season.” She says with smirk. “It should be my pick,” Tobin replies, “I’m the one scoring, you know.” She smirks right back at her. “With that attitude, you won’t be scoring at all!” Alex laughs, pulling her close and kissing her. “I knew you’d say that,” Tobin laughs, kissing her. Alex wakes during the night, getting up to use the bathroom, quickly returning to the warmth under the covers. In the dim light she sees Tobin sleeping soundly, the steady rise and fall of her chest, her soft features. Alex snuggles in closer to her, the fleeting thought of Tobin having a sleeping disorder making her wonder about how it’s treated professionally. She wonders if the nightmares happen to her every night. Her head finds Tobin’s shoulder, her hand on her sternum. She shifts her hips and lays her leg over Tobin’s and falls back asleep. December 30, 2017 After a lazy morning, they go to Tobin’s house so she can do a couple of things before she leaves for LA. Alex has brought with her a couple of reference books about Portland during the early 1900’s to get a sense of the era and understand the political and social feel of the city during that time. She’s found some clues that a suspected rum runner possibly lived in Tobin’s house, but she’s still putting the pieces together. She likes working at Tobin’s house, the impressive desk allows her to spread out her papers and books for easy cross reference, the chair is surprisingly comfortable. The gentleman in the leather chair just sits and reads, he keeps to himself. Ellie, the young chambermaid, comes in occasionally to ask her if she needs anything. As she places her books and notebook on the desk, she spies a small piece of paper, out of place on Tobin’s neat desk. She pulls it close to read it. ‘Amore, You are my everything.’She looks at the looping cursive script, obviously not Tobin’s. An unsettling thought crosses her mind, wondering where this came from and who it is meant for. She sets it back where she found it, shaking her head and thinking if she gets the chance, she’ll ask Tobin about it. Tobin doesn’t hover, she does her own thing, allowing Alex to do hers. That in itself speaks volumes to Alex, liking that Tobin respects the concentration Alex needs while she works. Tobin always makes sure they agree on a time for them to take a break or eat lunch so when she does come in, it’s to remind Alex that it’s time to eat or take a nap or whatever. Tobin had told her she was going to clean out her fridge and give her whatever she could use while she was out of town. Then she was doing laundry and her own paperwork, paying her bills, answering emails and then taking a nap. Alex is still concerned with how tired Tobin looks. She thought she looked refreshed when she got back from seeing her family, but now she looks tired again. She makes a note to talk to Syd and ask if she knows or has heard anything about the house energy taking away one’s strength. Maybe she’ll give Jamie a call and ask her too. She cocks her head, trying to decipher what she’s hearing. It sounds like Tobin is calling her name. She scoots the chair back and gets up, poking her head out of the study doorway before entering the hallway. She feels a breeze of angry energy blow past her, making her recoil her head back into the room, before she slowly pokes it out again. She takes a slow step into the hallway, leaning forward, wondering where Tobin is. “No!” she hears Tobin softly cry out. “I’m with Alex, no, please!” Alex takes large strides to the back side of the couch, finding Tobin curled into the couch, her hand over her head, rocking slightly as she cries. Alex moves to the other side of the couch, sitting down on the cushion. She gently places her hand on Tobin’s shoulder, rubbing it gently. “Tobin, wake up,” she says urgently, “wake up.” She’s slightly bewildered that Tobin could be having such dramatic dreams during a nap. She must fall into a deep sleep very quickly. “Make it stop!” Tobin cries, struggling to get up on her elbows, her eyes wildly looking around. “You’re okay,” Alex soothes, rubbing her back in large circles, “it’s okay,” she says. “Lex?” Tobin turns to look at her, her eyes red rimmed with tears. “You’re here?”“Yeah, I’m here,” Alex nods. Tobin flips over suddenly, pulling Alex to her, hugging her tightly. She’s crying hard, clutching at Alex as Alex leans into her, holding her. She’s running one hand though her hair, smoothing it back away from her face. Tobin is slowly calming down, hiccupping as she catches her breath. “What is wrong with me?” she mutters into Alex’s chest, “Why is this happening?” “I don’t know,” Alex admits, feeling helpless. She’s never been around someone who has had such intense nightmares, she doesn’t know how to best comfort her. So, she just holds her, rubbing her back, swaying a little as she Tobin continues to calm. Tobin pulls back, swiping her sleeve under her nose, wiping her eyes with the heels of her hands. She scoots back to lean in the corner of the couch, eyes downward. “Do you remember what is was about?” Alex asks quietly. Tobin sniffles her nose, “I just remember someone screaming at me, they were so mad.” She says, looking up. “I don’t remember why.” She lets out a breath. Alex shifts over, moving closer, “I’m sorry,” she says sincerely, “this is so disturbing. I’m sorry you’re going through this.” Tobin nods, yawning, “It’s just so weird,” she shakes her head, “I mean, when I was in college, there was, like, definite things to stress out about, you know?” she says, “But now, I mean, I don’t feel stressed, there’s nothing bothering me. I don’t know why this is happening. It feels, like, worse than before too.” “Hmmm,” Alex says, “maybe it’s just the enormity of buying a house?” She shrugs, “Maybe you don’t even realize how stressful it is.” “Maybe,” Tobin says, unconvinced. Alex places her hand on Tobin’s thigh, “Well, you said you’re going to talk to your doctor, do you think you should call now or wait?” Tobin sighs, “I think wait,” she says, “it’s kind of something I’d want to talk about face to face.” Alex nods, “I can respect that.” “Yeah,” Tobin says, “it’s just a couple of more days,” she says, “I’ll just tough it out.” “Maybe a glass of wine before bed tonight?” Alex suggests. “That’s probably a good idea.” Tobin agrees. Her stomach growls. “I should get dinner going.” “I’ll help.” Alex smiles, she leans in and kisses her, “it’ll get better,” “Yeah,” Tobin says as Alex rises from the couch and holds her hand out. Tobin takes it and stands. Alex hugs her, “It will.” They have dinner sitting in front of the TV, Alex teasing Tobin as she clicks through the channels. Alex is awoken to the strong scent of violets filling her nose. She senses anger before her eyes open, reaching for Tobin and finding the bed empty again. She sits up, shivering in the freezing room, the scent and anger quickly disappearing. She hears panting and a faint muttering. She leans forward and can see the lower half of Tobin’s legs stretched out on the floor.She gets up and stands at the foot of the bed, gasping as she sees Tobin naked, doing pushups. Sweat covers her body in a slick sheen, making it glisten over her rippling muscles as she works. Alex bends forward, trying to understand what she’s muttering. “Lex, Lex, Lex, Lex,” Tobin repeats with every completed push up. Alex gets her back in bed, slightly freaking out over this. “It’s you, right?” Tobin whispers, “It’s really you?”“Yes,” Alex whispers back, holding her close. Tobin sighs, her fingers finding Alex’s core, leaning forward to kiss her deeply as her hand slides to her center and starts circling her clit. Alex moves her hand in between Tobin’s legs, doing the same to her. Soon their heavy breathing fills the room, turning to pants and then gasps as they both find release. Alex holds Tobin tightly, worried for her as they both drift to sleep. December 31, 2017 Tobin zips the suitcase, finally finished packing. She has everything she needs, her backpack set as well. Alex is in the study, working on some papers to keep herself occupied. They’ll leave her place at four thirty to allow time for both of them to get dressed for their evening over at Alex’s place. She looks at her watch. Tobin sits on her couch, wondering why her shoulders and arms are so tired. She thinks it’s probably from something during the night. She considers asking Alex if something happened, but part of her is fearful of her answer. She’s so tired, she lays her head back on the couch, shutting her eyes. Why is this happening, she wonders. What the fuck is wrong with me. She feels a weight on her legs, a body straddling her. Tobin opens her eyes and is met with fiery green ones staring at her. A hand is placed on her throat, rendering her speechless. “You listen to me,” the dark haired woman says, her voice low and clipped with her French accent, “you are mine and will be forever.” She finishes threateningly. She surges forward, kissing her, Tobin turning her head to get away. Her body is paralyzed, she can’t move. She feels a stinging slap against her cheek. “I get what I want.” She speaks, pointing a finger at her, her green eyes blazing in anger. “I want you.” Tobin watches with wide eyes as she disappears in front of her. She lets out a breath she didn’t know she was holding, her mouth suddenly dry. She looks at her watch, only a half an hour has passed. She stands with shaky legs, moving to the kitchen to get a drink of water. She stands at the counter, chugging half the glass. What the fuck is going on, she thinks. She’s half wanting to call her doctor now and half hesitant because she knows she’ll sound like a lunatic over the phone. I sleep better at Alex’s, she comforts herself, I’ll be better when I get back from LA. This will pass and I’ll get a handle on it she convinces herself. She decides to move out the items from the turret room. They had looked them briefly, Alex asking if she could take the crates back to her place. She gets them to the main floor, going back upstairs to look over the other items. There’s a long chaise lounge chair, wide enough for two people. She thinks it would look awesome in the study. She’ll ask Syd if they could bring it back to life. It’s dusty and worn looking. She pulls it out of the turret room into the attic. There’s a vanity that looks nice, she wouldn’t use it but maybe it could go in a guest room. She finds an upright tall and narrow jewelry cabinet. That looks pretty cool. She grins to herself thinking she could keep her few pieces of jewelry in it and then the deeper drawers could hold her beanies. She finds that amusing. She hears Alex call her so she leaves the room and heads downstairs. Tobin grins at Alex as they follow the hostess to their table. Once again, it’s in the back, more private and quiet even for a busy evening. They slide into their seats. “You look really nice in that dress, sweetheart.” Alex smiles at her. “Thanks,” Tobin replies with a smile. “You look smoking hot in yours.” Alex blushes, “I’m looking forward to another French Kiss tonight,” she says, smirking across the table. “Oh, even if it’s not on the menu, I can guarantee you’ll be getting as many as you can stand.” Tobin says, her eyes darkening. “Is that so?” Alex questions, batting her eyelashes at her. “Oh yeah,” Tobin nods knowingly.Alex looks down scans the menu, “Hmm, the Northwest Kiss sounds good,” she comments. “I like the Southern Kiss better,” Tobin says as she eyes at her menu. Alex creases her forehead, not seeing it. She looks up at smirking Tobin. “It’s like a French Kiss,” she informs her, “but lower.” Alex opens her mouth to ask what she means but then realizes what she’s saying. She leans back in the booth. “Someone’s a little horny tonight.” She arches an eyebrow at her. “Someone’s not going to be seeing you for a while.” Tobin says, “I’m not going to let you forget about me tonight.” “I see.” When their drinks arrive, Tobin holds her glass up, looking across the table at Alex. “You know, it’s been fifty-three days since we were here,” she says, “and that night you captivated me. I’m so grateful you’re in my life and I hope we’re together for a long time.” “I do, too.” Alex smiles and they gently clink their glasses and take a sip. She’s so charming, Alex thinks as Tobin tells the server they’ll do the Chef’s Menu. I really like her, it was so sweet of her to keep track of how many days it’s been since we were here last, I think we’ll talk seriously about everything when she gets back. She needs to know that her house is haunted. She needs to know I think a ghost is affecting her sleep. She needs to know that I can see them. “You okay?” Tobin asks, breaking her from her thoughts. Alex nods and smiles at her. “Perfect.” Tobin smiles back at her. I think she could be the one, she thinks to herself. I want to ask her about her car crash, I want to know everything about her. I think she knows something is going on with my house. I think I can tell her about my dreams. I’m pretty positive I can trust her. When I get back, I think we’ll really talk about everything. She nods to herself. “So, you’re basically saying we’re going to be pretty drunk then, right?” Tobin grins as they walk hand in hand up the sidewalk to Syd and Dom’s house.“I’m just saying that you should go easy on anything that’s offered to you.” Alex laughs. Music is thumping through the front part of the house, Tobin and Alex dancing together for what seemed like hours. Tobin stuck to beer, Alex going with vodka mixed drinks. Somehow, they get pulled into the heated garage and suckered into entering an intense beer pong tournament. Posters are taped to the garage doors, showing the entrants in the round robin tournament. Both are surprised to find themselves rising through the ranks, staying at the table beating their opponents. Tobin glances over to the other table. She leans onto Alex, “Syd and Dom are tearing it up over there,” she says, taking a swig of her beer. Alex takes the bottle from her. “We’re gonna murder them.” She says, setting the bottle down on a side table. Her competitive nature has kicked in. “Hey,” Tobin says, reaching for it. Alex bats at her hand, her eyes blazing, “Save it for the game, Click,” she nods at her. “I’ll be right back.” Tobin is chatting with the person next other when Alex appears, offering her a jello shot and a water bottle. “Gotta stay hydrated, Click,” she smirks. They do their shot and share a quick kiss and then the game is on. Both of them are over the line of being tipsy but not quite drunk yet. Adrenaline races through Tobin as they step up to begin. She turns to Alex, putting her hand out. Alex puts hers on top of it. “Team on three.” Tobin says, game face on. “One, two, three Team!” They both yell, laughter from those surrounding them. Both are as serious as they can be for as much alcohol they’ve consumed. After winning the game easily, they drift over to the other table, watching as Syd and Dom sweep their opponents. Alex is leaning heavily on Tobin, Tobin has her arm wrapped around her waist. She leans over, “Lex, I think this is the first time I’ve ever played beer pong in heels.” Alex laughs, “I think this is the first time I’ve ever gotten to the Championship match.” “Well, then we gotta win.” Tobin says, straightening up and drinking her water. “I’ll be right back, I gotta find a bathroom.” “You want me to go with?” Alex questions innocently. Tobin smirks at her, “No, we’ll never make it out for the match.” Alex smacks her ass as Tobin passes her and leaves. “We got this!” Tobin shouts, shaking Alex’s shoulders, “We will be the Champions!” “Ball. In. Cup.” Alex says determinedly, very serious except for the crooked grin and glazed eyes. Tobin looks at her, nodding seriously as well, looking just about as drunk as her. The jello shot had kicked in along with everything else they’d been drinking. It’s after eleven, they’ve been here for hours, drinking and dancing and now playing the Championship match. They’re both drunk. So is Dom who grins wildly at them from across the table, the tail of his dress shirt untucked, tie askew. Syd looks fresh as a daisy, still glamorously put together and showing no signs of the alcohol catching up to her. The garage is packed, people chanting PT-FC, Tobin and Dom sharing smiles. It quiets down. Syd points her finger at Alex. “You’re going down.” She says smirks. Alex smirks right back at her, “I am, but that’s later, back at my place,” she wiggles her eyebrows. “Oh!” the crows shouts. Syd huffs at her. Dom bellows with laughter. Tobin is laughing her ass off next to her, holding onto the table for support. The smack talk increases as the game begins. Dom misses a cup. “Maybe you should use your feet,” Tobin quips at him. He shakes his head. “You think you’re better with your hands?” He shoots her a glare. “Oh, I know she is!” Alex says lecherously, sending the crowd into another uproar. Alex and Tobin have a huge lead, Alex being on fire with her tosses and Tobin as well. Feeling good, Tobin takes the ball, places it between her lips, wiggles her eyebrows at Syd and Dom and pops it out into a cup. A perfect shot. The crowd cheers. Syd, fuming, puts her hands on her hips, “How did you do that?” she complains loudly. She looks around the room, “How did she do that?” Alex is dancing next to Tobin, doing a little shimmy, Syd glares at her. “Syd,” she calls, getting her attention, “talented mouth.” She says nodding knowingly. Syd slaps her hand to her forehead as the garage erupts in laughter and cheers. Tobin is laughing so hard, Alex holds on to her, afraid she’s going to stagger off. Tobin gives her a quick kiss, “You’re something else.” She says grins. Alex nods seriously at her. “Finish this, Click, I gotta pee.” The ball is tossed easily into the last cup, the crowd cheering. Tobin embraces Alex and drunkenly spins her around, kissing her. They both end up leaning against the wall, getting their balance back, laughing. Someone hands them each a beer. They shake hands with Dom and Syd, Syd still giving them the evil eye and then laughing and congratulating them. Dom presents them with a hideous trophy, a glued on red cup as the topper. Alex holds it high amidst the cheers as they make their way back into the house, looking to use the bathroom again. “Three! Two! One! Happy New Year!” they all shout. Alex pulls Tobin in to her, kissing her deeply. “I want to be your New Year’s kiss forever,” Tobin confesses, squeezing her tight. “I want to be yours, too, baby,” Alex agrees, kissing her again. They find some snacks, munching hungrily, drinking water and visiting with Syd who is still a little salty about the loss. An hour later, they order an Uber and wait outside, both hoping the brisk coldness would help to sober them a little. The ride is fast, Alex keeps pushing Tobin’s hand from her thigh. They arrive at Alex’s house, deciding to get ready for bed. Tobin is struggling with her contacts. “I’m really drunk.” She confesses as she sways and side steps while getting her contact out successfully. “Me too,” Alex grins at her with a messy toothpaste smile. They slide into bed, both sighing at the same time. They kiss sloppily, hands groping each other. “Will you hate me if I go to sleep?” Alex murmurs, cupping Tobin’s breast. “Nah,” Tobin replies sleepily, “that’s a good idea.” “Good night,” Alex says kissing her, “Goodnight.” Tobin replies.They both sigh as they snuggle to get comfortable. It’s quiet as they drift off. “Fuck,” Alex mumbles. “Huh?” Tobin grunts. “Bed spins.” Alex whines. “That sucks.” Tobin pulling her close. “Don’t puke on me.” “Shut up, Click.” They fall asleep. January 1, 2018 Tobin rolls over, her hand seeking Alex. She cracks a bleary eye open when she doesn’t find her. She hears talking coming from the other room but she’s so tired she just closes her eyes. Moments later, she feels the bed dip down and Alex crawling next to her. “Hey, babe,” Tobin says softly, still sleepy, eyes closed. “I brought you some Gatorade and Tylenol.” Alex says, her voice hushed and raspy in the early morning. “Oh, thanks,” Tobin smiles, opening her eyes and rolling to her, up on one elbow. She takes the pills and drinks half of the Gatorade in long chugs, not seeing Alex’s eyes on her throat as she swallows. “How are you feeling?” Tobin asks her, placing the bottle against her stomach and reaching to rub Alex’s shoulder. “Better than I thought I would,” Alex grins wryly, “how about you?” Tobin slowly lays back down, “Just a little headache, but good.” “Good,” Alex says, taking the Gatorade bottle and placing it on the nightstand. Then she slowly cuddles into Tobin’s arms. “It’s probably a very good thing you made us drink all of that water last night while we were playing.” Tobin says as she traces abstract patterns on Alex’s back with her fingertips. “Hydration is the key.” Alex yawns, “That’s why we’re the Champs.” “Were you talking to someone out there?” Tobin asks quietly. Alex freezes for a moment. She was speaking with Mrs. Cahill when she was in the kitchen. “Ah, just myself.” She replies, hoping it sounded normal. She feels Tobin nods as they fall back asleep. “Are you sure it’s okay to come see you on the fifth?” Alex questions as she navigates the car to enter the airport property, “That’s the very next day after your surgery, you should be resting.” “I’ll be fine,” Tobin reassures her, “it’s just my foot and it’s outpatient surgery, I’ll be okay.” “I don’t know,” Alex says, unsure if it’s a good idea. “Please?” Tobin insists, squeezing her hand, “it will be the only time I get to see you while I’m out there.” “I just don’t want to be in the way,” Alex says, “you know, like, with meeting your Mom and Perry and stuff.” “What if you meet them and they go to lunch so we can be alone for a little bit?” Tobin asks, her eyes hopeful. “We won’t be having sex,” she states firmly, “get that thought right out of your head, right now.”“Well, I wasn’t thinking of that, but now that you say that…” Tobin laughs. Alex slaps her arm. “Seriously,” Tobin says, “it will be fine.” “Okay.” Alex says, “I trust you.” She parks the car along the curb. They kiss deeply. “I’ll miss you.” Alex says, trying not to tear up. “I’ll miss you too,” Tobin says, hugging her tightly. “Go,” Alex steps back, “I don’t want to get all emotional here.” Tobin nods, pulling on her backpack, “Bye, babe.” “Text me when you land.” Alex says as she gets in the car. Tobin waves as she enters the building. When Tobin settles into her window seat, she leans her head back and closes her eyes, remembering the morning. They didn’t sleep long, instead rising to shower together and then have multiple rounds of sex until the early afternoon. They finally got dressed and went to lunch and then Alex dropped her off at the airport. While she was waiting for her flight, she checked her phone, answering texts from friends and family with Happy New Year wishes. January 3, 2018 “I’m sure everything will go smoothly,” Alex reassures Tobin. They’re finally alone on their FaceTime call. Tobin had introduced Alex to her Mom and Perry and they chatted for a while. Her Mom was currently reading her book and was excited to talk to her. They spent almost forty minutes talking about the house, Alex explaining what new pieces of history she had found in the some of the crates she was going through. She had come across one crate of the bootlegger’s possessions. A ledger with coded sales, old bottles, a wallet, some money. The newspaper clippings were helpful, setting the political and social currents with what this gentleman was up to. A letter written in French, Alex had copied it and was having it transcribed. She thought it was possibly from his Canadian supplier. She didn’t speak of the other things she had found, she wasn’t ready to just yet. The owner of the house before the bootlegger, her name was Christen Press. She got that from the County Office list Tobin had given her, she was a bit of a mystery. What she did find, stunned her. In 1930, she was tried and convicted of murder and sentenced to hang. Apparently, she had murdered a man from a prominent family in town but the details were shrouded in mystery. There was no photo with the article, but Alex sensed that maybe she was the spirit in Tobin’s house. That angry energy. She wanted to find more information before she called Jamie to discuss it. “You’re right,” Tobin agrees, “I guess I’m just a little nervous.”“That’s normal,” Alex states, “but everything will be fine and you’ll finally stop having so much pain.” “Yeah,” Tobin sighs, “but the good news is that I see you in two days.” “I can’t wait,” Alex smiles at her, “it has seemed like forever and it’s only been a couple of days.” “So, you’ll come around lunch time?” Tobin asks, nodding. “Yep.” Alex nods back at her. “Good.” Tobin smiles at her. “Tobs, we got to go,” Perry calls. “Uh, I got to head out,” Tobin frowns, “we’re going to dinner now.” “Okay, sweetheart,” Alex says, “have a good night and best of luck tomorrow.” “I’ll call you when I can,” Tobin promises. They blow a kiss at each other and then giggle. January 4, 2018 “Tell me why I am doing this again?” Tobin questions Perry. They’re at the hospital, it’s not even seven in the morning and she’s in a gown, monitors strapped to her, an IV in her arm and they are only minutes away from rolling her back into surgery. “Because you love soccer and you love me.” Perry grins impishly at her. “Right,” Tobin nods, starting to feel the effects of the Valium they had given her, “I love soccer,” she sighs, “I love you guys,” she says to her Mom and Perry. Tobin stirs as Perry calls to her. “Give me a thumbs up, Tobs.” She states.Tobin lazily raises her right hand, fingers curled, thumb up. She’s sprawled in a patio chair, legs on a chair in front of her, her wrapped foot carefully cushioned on soft pillows, enjoying the feel of the fresh air. “You can put your hand down,” Perry instructs, coming from behind her to look at her. “Take a little nap here, we’ll be just inside. Call if you need anything, okay?” “M’kay,” Tobin mumbles, eyes shutting and her head drifting to the side.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
January 5, 2018 Alex turns down the radio as she tries to find the correct condo address. She shakes her head at herself, wondering why she always does that. Like, the music being lower is going to make her find the place. Whatever. She finds it and parks, grabbing the small bouquet of happy looking orange flowers and a bag of Clementines, walking up the stairs, nervously, double checking her casual outfit of capris and a light flowing top.Perry answers the door, smiling brightly at Alex, gesturing for her to enter. “It’s so nice to officially meet you!” “You too, Tobin speaks so highly of you,” Alex replies as she glances around the room. “Tobin is still sleeping,” Perry explains, “she kind of had a rough night.” “Oh?” Alex questions, immediately concerned. Was it her foot or dreams, she wonders. Perry eyes her for the briefest of moments, taking in her genuine concern. “We couldn’t get her to take her meds, she was so loopy, and then she fell asleep and woke up in serious pain. It took awhile for the drugs to kick in and get her some relief.” “Oh, that’s awful,” Alex says, her shoulders dropping, thinking of Tobin suffering. “Oh,” she says, thrusting the flowers at Perry, “I brought her these.” “They’re so pretty!” Perry smiles, taking them, tilting her head for Alex to follow. Alex sees the similarities in the siblings, they familiar mannerisms in how they speak and gesture. “My Mom should be back any minute,” Perry states, “she’s bringing in lunch,” “Oh, I could have brought something on my way in,” Alex says as Perry waves at her. “No, my Mom wanted to do it. But thank you.” Perry is opening cabinets, looking for a small vase. “Why don’t you go and wake her?” she suggests, “she needs to eat something, she didn’t eat much of a breakfast.” “You’re sure?” Alex questions, not wanting to overstep any boundaries. “Absolutely,” Perry smiles, “then I want to hear all about your book adventures.” “Sure,” Alex smiles, setting her purse down on the counter, “uh, where is she?” “Oh,” Perry shakes her head, “second door on the left.”Alex nods, sets the bag of Clementines down on the table and makes her way down the hallway, slowly turning the knob to open the door. She lets her eyes adjust to the dim room, seeing the form on the bed covered by a lightweight blanket. She makes her way over towards Tobin, deciding to slide under the covers and hold her for a bit. She slips her sandals off and pulls the covers back to slide in. She snuggles close to Tobin, pressing her front into Tobin’s back, careful not to touch her legs for fear of hurting her. She brings her hand around Tobin’s waist, feeling the hospital wristband, finding her hand and holding it lightly. She nuzzles her head onto Tobin’s pillow, kissing her exposed neck. Tobin sighs, moving her legs slightly, snuggling in deeper to the mattress, pulling on Alex’s hand. Alex squeezes her hand, “Hi, baby, how are you?” she asks softly. Tobin mutters something Alex can’t understand, shifting again, turning to her back. Alex gets up on one elbow, leaning over Tobin’s face, planting a soft kiss on her lips. A smile spreads across Tobin’s face, puckering her lips without opening her eyes. Alex kisses her again, longer this time, relishing the touch and unique taste of Tobin as their tongues intertwine. She pulls back, watching Tobin open her eyes, pupils blown wide, clearly under the influence. “Hi,” she says softly, her throat rough. “Hi, sweetheart,” Alex smiles at her, moving her hand and stroking hair away from Tobin’s face, “how are you feeling?” Tobin’s mouth moves and her face grimaces as if she’s tasting something horrible, “I don’t know, weird.” “Are you hungry?” she asks, trying to get a read of how she’s doing. “Only for you,” Tobin wiggles her eyebrows at her. “Easy there, horndog,” Alex laughs lightly, “Perry is in the other room and your Mom should be here any minute.” Confusion crosses Tobin’s face, trying to put the pieces together in her head. “You’re in LA,” Alex states, “you had ankle surgery yesterday.” Tobin nods her head as she closes her eyes. “Right,” she says, her voice low and gravelly. “Did you want to get up so you can eat something, sweetie?” Alex asks as she strokes Tobin’s hair again. Tobin nods, breathing out a deep sigh. She pulls the covers up, looking under them and sets the blanket back down on herself. Alex cocks her head, looking at her. “Is it morning?” Tobin asks, clearly confused. “Lunch.” Alex confirms. “Oh,” Tobin nods again, “that’s why I’m dressed.” “Yeah,” Alex says, suppressing a smile. She’s so adorable right now, she thinks. “Was Perry nice to you?” Tobin asks, slowly pulling the covers back. Alex gives her a hand. “Of course, she was,” she answers. She gets up from the bed, moving around to be on Tobin’s side. She offers her a hand when Tobin sits up. Tobin just puts her hand up, “Dizzy,” she murmurs. She closes her eyes for a moment. “Better.” “Okay, why don’t we get up nice and slow?” Alex suggests, putting her arm under Tobin’s and lifting slowly as she stands. She hands her the crutches. “You good?” she questions, needing to know. “Yeah,” Tobin replies, her voice still raspy and rough. “Bathroom.” She slowly crutches out of the room and into the hall, striding to the next door. “You good in there?” Alex asks as she enters the bathroom. “Yeah,” Tobin replies, Alex nods and shuts the door. Alex walks back out to the living room, seeing Perry, who looks up at her. “Is she up?” she asks doubtfully. “Yeah,” Alex replies, “In the bathroom.” “You’re good,” Perry smiles, “would you like something to drink?” “Sure,” Alex smiles. “So, was her surgery okay? Did it go well?” “Oh yeah,” Perry states, “the doctors were very pleased.” “Oh, good,” Alex breathes, releasing some anxiety she was holding about it. “When Tobin texted me last night, she wasn’t making much sense. Neither when we FaceTimed.” Perry laughs, “She was so out of it!” She hands a glass of iced tea to Alex, “I’ve got video.” She smirks. Alex shakes her head, “She might kill you, right?” “It would be so worth it,” Perry grins, looking towards the hallway, Tobin slowly crutching towards them. “I’ll show you guys after lunch.” “Hey,” Tobin greets quietly, crutching to the table and sitting next to Alex. “How ya feeling, Tobs?” Perry inquires, looking at her intently. “Better,” Tobin nods, sniffing her nose. She clears her throat. Alex passes her glass of tea towards her. Tobin glances at her, smiling, and takes a drink. “Oh, that’s good.” “Thirsty?” Perry asks, hand on the fridge. Tobin nods and she soon hands her a glass of tea. “Thanks.” Perry places the small vase of flowers in front of Tobin, “Your girlfriend brought you these,” she smiles, her first impression of Alex very positive. “Oh, how pretty!” Tobin exclaims, her voice still soft. She blinks rapidly as she looks at them and leans forward to inhale the scent. She sneezes. Alex puts her hand on Tobin’s back, rubbing it lightly. “You okay?” “Yeah, just fizzy,” Tobin replies, still looking at the flowers. “Fizzy?” Both Perry and Alex ask, heads cocked at her. Tobin just waves her hand in front of her face, “Like, not all there.” “Fuzzy, babe?” Tobin nods, sending her a drunken smile, “Fuzzy, babe.” “You look so stoned right now,” Alex giggles, moving her hand and giving her a side hug. Tobin just smiles back at her, her eyes little slits. She takes a long drink of tea, “So thirsty,” she says, then she cocks her head, obviously thinking of something. She scrunches her face, concentrating and then she turns to Alex. “How was your meeting? The book deal?” “It went great,” Alex replies, “MGM is making it.” Tobin looks at her showing her teeth with an incredibly cheesy grin, “That’s the studio he worked for.” She says happily. “Yeah,” Alex laughs, amused at her. Tobin leans over to kiss her, “Congratulations, babe,” she murmurs, kissing her cheek, “I’m so excited for you.” She turns to Perry, “Her book is being made into a movie!” she says excitedly, not remembering they spoke of it yesterday. Tobin doesn’t remember much of yesterday though. She was pretty out of it for most of the day. Perry was almost pissing her pants when they let her and her Mom in to see Tobin post surgery. The ortho doc had made sure Tobin had some beautiful flowers on her table when she came to, exclaiming over them and making no sense at all. She filmed her as they were talking to her, catching comedy gold with their exchange. Tobin would be in the middle of speaking, then her head would fall to the side, dead asleep again. As she and her Mom stood there giggling, Tobin’s head snaps up, looking at then briefly, “Oh, hello,” she says, her eyes little slits and a shit eating grin on her face, giving them a quick wave, taking a deep breath and straightening her head, “I love this game,” her voice deep and slightly raspy, then pointing at Perry, “and I love you,” giving them a thumbs up and another cheesy grin. “Awwww,” their Mom says, giggling, “leave her alone, Per,” “Oh no,” Perry says, “this is Instagram worthy,” she smiles. Her Mom elbows her, “Mom, I won’t post anything until she’s lucid, c’mon, I wouldn’t do that to her.” Perry insists. “Just making sure,” Tobin’s head pops up again, squinting around the room and then frowning, “No Lex?” “Alex is coming tomorrow, dear,” her Mom reminds her. Perry is filming again. “No Lex,” she says sadly, looking up at them, “I really like her,” she gives them that wide smile, nodding slightly, “she’s so awesome.” “I’m so happy for you Tobin,” their Mom says, “she seems like a lovely girl,” “Yes,” Tobin sighs, “she’s so lovely,” she says in a sing song voice, “just lovely, lovely, lovely, lovely.” She smiles rocking her head from side to side and drifts off again. Perry bursts out laughing, lowering her phone, “I can’t wait to show her these,” she says excitedly. “You’re bad,” Cindy says, swatting at her. Once back at the condo, Tobin was insistent that the sun and fresh air would heal her faster so they get her set up on the patio, resting comfortably in two chairs, napping as soon as she was settled. The rest of her day was spent sleeping or speaking in nonsense, still really high from the drugs and then the pain meds. Before dinner, Perry showed her the photo of her on the patio and Tobin insisted she post it on her IG account with a short message. Cindy comes in with a couple of bags from a local restaurant, setting them on the table, greeting Alex with a hug. Lunch is entertaining, Alex helping Tobin eat her meal, Tobin being a bit uncoordinated. When they finish, they sit on the patio, passing around Perry’s phone, laughing at the videos she took. Alex grows quiet, blushing, while she watches the one where Tobin sings that she’s lovely. Tobin’s blushing as well, having enough sense in her drugged induced state to realize what was happening. She leans over in her chair to brush shoulders with Alex, “You are lovely,” she says softly, eyes gleaming at her. Alex smiles at her, grabbing her hand and squeezing it. “Per, I want to post that one from surgery, the I love soccer one,” Tobin insists, nodding happily. Alex is absentmindedly playing with Tobin’s hair, her head in her lap as she sits in the corner of the couch. They could all see that Tobin was growing uncomfortable, feeling the pain in her ankle and insisting she was fine. Alex finally turned to her and stated she needed to take her meds. Tobin’s shoulders had dropped, defeated, nodding her head. “But I just want to visit with you,” she says sadly, still a little out of it. “I’ll hang out for awhile, okay?” She comforts, “I’m not going anywhere.” Tobin smiles, “Can we nap on the couch?” Alex nods, “You can nap and I’ll visit with Perry and your Mom, okay? I’ll be right there with you.” Tobin nods, dutifully swallowing her medications, crutching slowly to the couch in the living room. She tosses some pillows on the couch, stationing them near her foot, elevating it as she sits, Alex sliding in so she can put her head down on her lap. “Alex, has Tobin told you about her sleep issues?” Perry questions, looking at her intently. “Yes, she has,” Alex admits, “I’ve witnessed a few.” Perry raises her eyebrows and she smirks, her Mother slapping Perry’s arm.“We’re all adults, here, dear,” Cindy says warmly to a blushing Alex, “I’m concerned about her.” She says, leaning forward in her chair. Tobin is sleeping soundly, soft snores coming from her, Alex moves her hand from her hair and rests it on her shoulder. “She did talk to her doctor, right?” Alex asks, “She told me she was going to.” Cindy nods, “Yes, and she prescribed Ambien for her to take before bed, but I’m not sure that’s the best thing for her.” “What do you mean?” Alex questions. Cindy leans back in her chair, crossing her legs, “When I divorced her father, Tobin was in college. She had been playing for UNC, making appearances with the Senior National Team and then making the Olympic roster.” Alex nods. “It was just too much for her to juggle, and this sleep thing developed.” Perry states, shaking her head. “We all thought she was fine, upset about Mom and Dad but, understanding it and working through it, just like me, Katie and Jeffrey were.” “Tobin was always more sensitive than the others, I really worked hard to speak with her and let her know exactly why we were splitting and how it had nothing to do with her.” Cindy adds.“She felt responsible.” The words leave Alex’s lips before she could stop them. Her hand shoots up to cover her mouth. “I’m sorry,” she says quickly, embarrassed that she might upset Tobin’s Mom. Cindy waves a hand at her, “You’re right, I think she did. She’s never told me,” she sighs, “and she never will, but I think in her mind she tied it to soccer and it sent her into a tailspin.” “Did she sleepwalk and talk as kid?” Alex asks, intrigued. Cindy and Perry nod. “Big time.” Perry states. “It always got worse around tournaments and when she was stressed trying to manage her time between soccer and school and attempting a social life. Dad caught her once kicking a soccer ball around the living room at four in the morning. Totally asleep.” “What did they do for her in college to help her?” Alex asks, now rubbing Tobin’s shoulder. “Intensive therapy,” Cindy says, reaching for her drink and taking a sip. “The team psychologist worked with her and so did the one for the National Team.” “I suspect they medicated her too,” Perry says, “but she wouldn’t talk about it. Stubborn.” “As a mule.” Cindy adds, shaking her head. “I spoke mostly with her coaches, who were extremely helpful, truly caring and very encouraging that this was something many athletes went through.” “Tobin doesn’t like to admit when she needs help. Ever.” Perry flatly asserts. Alex begins to wonder where this conversation is going. Her senses are heightened. “I know you’ve only been seeing each other for a little over a month,” Cindy says, looking nervous for the first time, “but I was curious to your thoughts.” “You’ve certainly spoke with Allie and Sinc, right?” Alex questions, they were much closer to Tobin and had known her for much longer than she did. “Yes,” Cindy nods, a small smile appearing on her face, “but you know her, more, uh, intimately than they do.” Alex raises her eyebrows at Cindy’s boldness. “And?” Alex asks, looking a little confused. “Alex,” Perry interjects, “we’ve heard only wonderful things about you.” She reassures her. “I guess what my Mother is trying to spit out is this: what do you think is stressing Tobin? We’re all a bit perplexed.” Alex looks down at the side of Tobin’s face in her lap, she smiles. “We spoke about this just the other day.” She says. “Tobin had only been napping a short while and I had to wake her from a nightmare of some sort. It was very frightening, she was very emotional.” She rubs Tobin’s shoulder, “She told me she has no clue what could be triggering them.” She states. “She told me a little about her time in college, about how she could identify what she was dealing with and how it was affecting her. She really has no clue to what’s going on now.” Both Perry and Cindy look at her, Perry’s shoulders slumped as if she was expecting Alex to have an answer. “I do have a possible theory,” Alex offers, “but I’m not sure how you’ll feel about it.” “Oh honey,” Cindy says, “I’m at my wits end, I’m willing to listen to anything.” Alex nods and takes a deep breath. If she thinks she has a chance of being with Tobin in her future, she needs to know how her family will treat her if they eventually learn about her true self. She decides to be brave. “So, did Tobin tell you she had her house cleansed?” Alex asks, looking at the two women across from her. They both nod. “Have you ever walked into a house or a somewhere and just got a weird vibe?” she asks, watching closely as they both nod. “I like to think that’s some sort of energy,” Alex states, “what about you guys?” Perry nods, “I know what you mean, when we looking for houses just after I got married, we went to see one and it was like this thick wall of anger or something.” Cindy is studying Alex intently. “Dear, you helped her with the cleansing, correct?” she asks. Alex nods. “Did you feel something?” She leans forward, “Do you feel something?” Alex looks at her with wide eyes, she’s never been called out like this before. She traces a pattern on Tobin’s shoulder as she formulates her response. “I think I’m,” she shrugs, “sensitive to some things.” She says, “And I think there’s some sort of energy that’s making Tobin have trouble sleeping.” “You think it’s still there after the cleansing?” Cindy asks, leaning forward in her chair. Perry is watching the exchange quietly, her mind trying to figure out what is exactly going on. “After Christmas we spent the night at my place and she slept fine.” Alex states. “At her house the next night, she had some sort of nightmare during a nap and then later, after we went to sleep, I found her out of bed, on the floor doing pushups. Totally asleep.” “What can be done about it?” Cindy asks anxiously. “I think it’s tied to the house,” Alex sighs, “I’ll be exclusively working on the research of it when I get back.” Cindy nods. She leans back in her seat. “Do you need…help?” she asks cautiously. Alex understands that Cindy knows what’s she’s saying without saying it. Perry hasn’t figured it out yet. “I have some friends that can help me when the time comes.” Alex states confidently. “Please let me know if I can be of any assistance. I’ll come at the drop of a hat.” Cindy smiles warmly at her. “I sure will.” Alex smiles back at her. “So, you think the house’s energy needs another cleansing?” Perry asks, still trying to put it all together. “Yeah,” Alex nods, “like, a deeper cleansing, you know? Like, the Catholics have their own way of doing it, mysticals do it differently, the New Age people use crystals. It’s just a matter of combining the right ones to get it to work. It happens sometimes.” It rolls easily off her tongue, sounding so reassuring. Perry seems satisfied with that answer. Her phone chirps. “Oh, I’ve got to take this.” She says, rising from her chair and leaving Alex sitting there, Tobin on her lap with Cindy still looking at her. Cindy gives her a reassuring look, “You’ve got the gift, don’t you?” She asks quietly, as if she feels Tobin can hear her even though her snores are getting a bit louder. “Second sight?”Alex takes a deep breath and nods. She looks down at Tobin, exhaling and rubbing her shoulder again, “I haven’t told her yet.” She whispers. Cindy nods. “She won’t hear it from me.” Alex looks up quickly at her. “You tell her how you need to,” Cindy states, “I won’t take that from you.” A wave of emotions floods through Alex. Her lower lip trembles, “Thank you.” She whispers gratefully, knowing if she tries to speak louder, she’ll start crying. Cindy get up from her chair, taking a few steps towards Alex and resting her hand on her shoulder. “It’ll all work out, sweetheart. Trust her. She really likes you.” Alex puts her hand over Cindy’s squeezing lightly. The thought of Tobin doing the same to her that day when she came to the house, asking for a second chance. She looks up at her. “Thank you,” she repeats and gives her a small smile.“Why don’t you snuggle in and nap with her, dear.” She suggests. “Would you like to stay for dinner?” she asks, “I don’t know your timeline.”“I would like that very much, if it’s not too much trouble.” Alex replies, regaining her voice. “I think Perry and I could do some errands and then bring back dinner.” She smiles, “Give you two some alone time.” “Thank you for being so thoughtful.” Alex smiles at her. “Here,” Cindy hands her pillow from one of the chairs, “get comfy.” “Thank you,” Alex replies, shifting her hips slightly and getting on an angle that’s more comfortable. She puts her feet up on the ottoman, crossing her legs, moving slowly as to not disrupt Tobin too much. She moves her hand under Tobin’s arm in order to hold her close and then leans back and closes her eyes. As she drifts off, she mulls over the whole conversation with Cindy. The woman just seemed to know that she could sense things. I wonder how, Alex thinks. Does she have the second sight, can she see ghosts, she wonders. She sighs deeply, happy that Cindy was so understanding and hoping that Tobin would be even a fraction as much when she tells her. “It’s just a little over two weeks and then I’ll see you.” Alex smiles, giving her one final kiss. Tobin smiles at her, looking up at her from the bed. “I wish you could stay forever,” Tobin mumbles, feeling the meds kicking in. It’s only eight-thirty but Tobin was still not one hundred percent after dinner. Cindy offered for Alex to help Tobin get ready for bed, tucking her in and saying goodnight. Alex quietly shuts the door behind her, walking out to living room where Perry and Cindy are sitting with the TV on. Perry turns her head when she hears her. “Did she go down okay?” “Yeah,” Alex smiles, “she’s so out of it.” She picks up her purse and walks over to them. They both stand. “Thank you so much for today,” Alex beings, “it was so nice to meet you both and hang out.” “Thank you, dear,” Cindy says, hugging her tightly, “I know Tobin will be in good hands when she goes home.” They had discussed their plan after dinner about Alex working remotely and being able to help Tobin out for a bit when she got back to Portland. Alex blushes, “It will be no problem to hang and help her if she needs it.” “I’m going to text you if Tobin starts slacking about giving me updates, okay?” Perry grins. They had exchanged numbers already. “Sure thing,” Alex grins, “I’ll keep on her.” “We’ll see you for the preseason tournament.” Cindy nods as they walk to the door. “Absolutely!” Alex nods. “Take care, sweetheart,” Cindy hugs her again, “and really, call me if you need to.” “I will,” Alex says quietly. January 11, 2017 “Seattle.” Allie sighs, “do you believe it?” Tobin shakes her head and then smiles. “Only a few hours away,” she shrugs. “I’m now the enemy, Harry.” Allie states flatly. “I highly doubt Portland fans will be burning your jersey or anything.” Tobin reassures her, “I think they’ll be pretty upset.” Allie sighs, “It had to happen sooner than later,” she says, “I mean Seattle is looking like they have a pretty stacked line up.” “They do for sure, now.” Tobin smiles at her. “Aw, Harry!” Allie exclaims, hugging her hard, “You’re so sweet!” “Can’t breathe!” Tobin utters.“I mean, I like Vlatko, he seems like a good coach. Remember when we were at his camp forever ago?”“Dude,” Tobin laughs, “we didn’t even know each other back then. We were just,” she shrugs, “at the same camp.” Allie had come over as soon as she could after practice with the National Team when she heard the news. Since Tobin was in town, she wanted to tell her in person. “At least it wasn’t Boston.” Tobin offers. They know the team’s ownership is shaky right now. They had heard many rumors floating around that they would fold if something drastic wasn’t done. Like, new owners or something. Allie nods. “So, when are you guys going out there?” Tobin asks. “So, yeah, we need to talk about that.” Allie says looking at her. “You’re home in ten days.”Tobin nods. “You need to report sooner.” Allie nods. “Alex is around, she has a key, she can be there to let you guys in.” Tobin offers. “She would?” Allie asks, tilting her head. “I don’t want her to have to take off work or anything.” She demures. “Actually,” Tobin says, shifting in her seat on the patio, “she’ll be off from work starting next week.” Allie raises her eyebrows at her. “She’s taking a sabbatical from work.” Tobin explains. “A sabbatical?” Allie questions, tilting her head. “Yeah, like, she’s doing her own thing for a while.” Tobin explains. Allie reaches for her phone, typing away. She reads the definition of a sabbatical. She scrunches her face. “Well, what is she doing?” Tobin puffs out her chest, shaking her head a little, “She’s researching my house.” She says proudly. “Oh, come on!” Allie exclaims, shaking Tobin’s arm, “What is she really doing?” “No, seriously,” Tobin smiles at her, “She’s researching my house. From what she’s already found out, she thinks maybe it would be the source of a decent book or something.” “Huh,” Allie sits back in her seat, grinning at Tobin, “that’s super cool, Har.” “Yeah,” Tobin smiles wide, blushing a little. “So, hey,” Allie turns to her, shifting to look her in the eye, “how’s your sleeping thing going?” “Well,” Tobin says, scratching the back of her neck, “fine so far. I take an Ambien before bed and nothing’s happened. No nightmares, no vivid dreams,” she shrugs. “That’s good,” Allie encourages, “right?” Tobin sighs, “I sleep just fine when I stay at Alex’s place.” Tobin admits. “It’s when I’m home.” Allie studies her closely. “Did the cleansing not work?” Tobin grimaces, “Maybe not,” she admits, “but Lex said we could do another one, like, sort of a different type of one that might be better.” “Huh.” Allie nods. “You had nightmares after it?”Tobin nods, not looking at her. Allie scoots her chair closer, leaning forward and hugging her. “It will all work out,” she states, “Alex seems like she knows what she’s talking about.” “Yeah,” Tobin says slowly, “she does.” Allie looks at her. “I think maybe she can feel the vibe, like you do.” Tobin says quietly. “How does that make you feel?” Allie asks prudently. “I want to ask her about it,” Tobin says earnestly, “I want to ask her a bunch of things, but I’m scared she’ll, like, put up a wall,” she shivers, “kind of like she did before.” She finally looks at Allie, “I don’t want to scare her away.” “I have a feeling you’ll know when the time is right.” Allie says confidently, nodding at her. They sit in silence for a few minutes. “Har, do you think, like, maybe a spirit or something can, like, invade your dreams or something?” Tobin asks as she toys with her water bottle. Allie looks at her, seeing how nervous Tobin has suddenly become. “Can you give me an example of what you mean?” Allie asks quietly. She knows Tobin struggles to speak about what bothers her sometimes, so she has to proceed very slowly and carefully. Tobin also has trouble articulating exactly what she means, so Allie tries to get the whole picture of what Tobin’s trying to say. Tobin sighs and shifts in her seat, scratching at her leg. “Like, I found this photo, it’s an old photo of a woman,” She says, still not looking at Allie, “and she, like, comes to me in my dreams.” Allie’s eyebrows shoot high. “Really?” Tobin nods, “Yeah,” a blush appearing on her face and neck. “Like, she scares you and gives you nightmares?” “Sometimes,” Tobin replies uneasily. Jesus Tobin, Allie thinks, it’s like pulling teeth to figure this out, but she knows she has to go slow so Tobin doesn’t clam up. “And the other times?” she asks her gently. Tobin glances at her, only for a second before focusing on her water bottle again, “They’re, like, sexual, and scary at the same time. I, I don’t always remember them but sometimes I wake up and I don’t have my clothes on or I’m, like, doing something weird.” Her voice is trembling. “Al, it’s really fucking with my head,” she says, giving her a pleading look, “I feel like I’m going crazy or something.” Allie shifts in her seat, extending a hand to touch Tobin’s forearm, “But you sleep fine anywhere else? You’re sleeping okay here?” she asks, the concern in her voice unmistakable. Tobin nods, not wanting to look at her, “Yeah.” “So,” she says quietly, “do you think it’s the house? Like, she’s a ghost or something?” “I don’t know!” Tobin exclaims loudly, raising her hands and shaking them in frustration. “I mean, with my past sleeping problems, everyone thinks it’s in my head, you know? But what if this is something,” she sighs, “something different? Something worse?” She whispers. Allie nods as she mulls over her response. “What if you stay at Alex’s when you get back, for a few days.” She says, “Tell her what’s going on, that you don’t feel comfortable there until you have another cleansing?”Tobin chews on the side of her mouth, then looks at Allie, “She’ll think I’m crazy if I tell her.” “I don’t think so,” Allie reasons. Tobin clucks her tongue, “Oh, yeah, she’s gonna be just fine with me telling her I get fucked by a ghost in my sleep?” she hisses, turning to look at the patio doors, making sure Perry or her Mom don’t overhear. “Well, maybe not if you tell her like that,” Allie replies sarcastically, “just, talk to her.” Tobin sighs, “I’m scared to,” she admits, “I sound like a lunatic.” “No, you don’t, Har,” Allie comforts, “yeah, it’s a little out there, but something is going on with your house.” Tobin takes a deep breath and blows it loudly from her mouth, “This is crazy.” “Talk to her.” Allie insists. Tobin nods. They’re quiet again for a minute. “You know, they gave Tierna your number in camp.” Allie confides. She's known Tobin long enough to know that conversation is over. Tobin nods, “She called me the first day,” she says, “she was freaked out I’d be pissed at her.” “You didn’t scare her, did you?” Allie accuses her, narrowing her eyes at her. “No!” Tobin puts her hands up in surrender, “I mean, I may have messed with her a little,” she grins, her humor returning, “but no. I told her how I wore Lil’s jersey and thought I was gonna faint.” “She did seem better the next day,” Allie thinks out loud, “you were probably super sweet to her.” Tobin smiles, “I remember what it was like,” she admits, “I did tell her to avoid social media for a bit if she could.”“People can be such assholes,” Allie shakes her head, referring to the ‘fans’ who make assumptions and spread rumors. “It’s already out there, you know.” “What?” Tobin questions, looking at her. “The suggestions that you’re too injured to play anymore.” Allie says quietly. “That the foot thing is a cover for your back. The DA job is getting you ready to join the coaching staff.”Tobin leans back in her seat, bringing the heels of her hands to her eyes, “Ugh!” she says, frustrated. She drops her hands and points at Allie, “This is why I’m not all over social media.” She says angrily, “Fucking shit like that.” She mutters. She leans over onto Allie’s shoulder.“I know, Har,” Allie says, accepting Tobin’s head on her shoulder. “People can be such dicks.” Tobin sighs deeply, letting the air out noisily through her mouth, “Well,” she says in a calmer voice, “the people who need to know, know the truth and that’s what matters.” “Preach it,” Allie agrees. They sit for another moment quietly until Allie nudges Tobin’s shoulder, “I do like the one about you becoming a pro surfer, though.” She smiles. “Hhmm,” Tobin sits back up and taps her chin with two fingers, “maybe a pro snowboarder.” January 22, 2018 “Good to have you back home, Tobin,” the flight attendant says cheerily as she hands Tobin her crutches. Tobin’s been on this flight so many times, she knows the crew pretty well by now. “Thanks so much, Dana,” Tobin smiles wide at her, “it’s so good to be back.” She exits the plane and crutches up the jet way. Pleased to realize her gate is close to baggage claim, she happily crutches along with a silly grin she can’t keep off her face. She’s excited to see Alex. She can’t wait to see her. She wants to talk to her about the house, find out what she thinks. She wants to tell her that she thinks she knows what’s behind her weird sleeping issues. She prays she’s understands. An attendant in a cart rides up, slowing down, keeping the same pace as she crutches along, “Need a lift?” he asks genially. “Thanks, baggage is close,” she nods at him, “I got this.” “You’re sure?” he asks, looking at her carefully as he cruises next to her. “Totally,” Tobin grins, seeing the first display of baggage claim, “thanks, though.” He nods and smiles, “Good, deal,” he says, speeding up a bit, “Go Thorns!” he calls out. Tobin spies Alex standing on the lower rack of the lined up bag carts, head high, scanning the crowd. She watches as Alex sees her and her face lights up with a smile. She hops down, walking briskly towards her. Tobin stops moving, balancing on one foot, holding her crutches with her right hand, her left outstretched for a hug.“Hi, babe!” Alex exclaims as she draws, giving her a quick kiss and hugging her. They step back, Tobin getting both of her crutches under herself and Alex points to the carousel. “It’s so good to see you!” Tobin smiles as they wait for the trickle of bags to down the shoot. “You saw me every day you were gone.” Alex shakes her head. Tobin elbows her, “You know what I mean,” she says, smiling at her. “I do,” Alex smiles back at her. Tobin points out her large suitcase, Alex struggling a little to get it off the moving carousel, making Tobin laugh. “Sorry it’s so heavy,” she shrugs. “Ah, that’s okay,” Alex grins as she pulls it along behind her. “I can bring the car up if you don’t want to walk all the way there,” she offers. “Nah,” Tobin shakes her head, “need to move a bit after sitting for so long.” “You sure, sweetie?” Alex questions, “I don’t mind.” “No,” Tobin says, “I need to move after sitting.” She says, “You know, blood clots.” Alex’s head whips fast to look at Tobin. “Is something going on you haven’t told me about?” she asks seriously, her pace slowing down. Tobin stops crutching when she realizes Alex is behind her. “No, Lex, I swear,” she says, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it to scare you.” Alex begins walking slowly, her hand on her chest, looking at Tobin seriously. “Anytime we fly, we always move after, just to get the circulation going. Blood clots can be a real threat on flights, so it’s important. I’m not having any problems, my Doctor doesn’t think it’s an issue or anything. Just a precaution.” Alex drops her hand and releases a sigh. “You scared me for a minute.” “I’m sorry,” Tobin says, her face and voice reflecting regret. “It’s okay,” Alex smiles, rubbing Tobin’s arm as they start moving again. Once Tobin is buckled in her seat, she looks over to Alex expectantly with a little smirk on her face. “What?” Alex questions, titling her head curiously. “So, is this, like, another airport greeting, like, from Christmas?” She jokes, leaning back and spreading her legs wide, grinning at her. “You’re an ass!” Alex laughs, slapping her arm, “shut up!” Tobin just giggles.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Non-con warningThey stop at the pharmacy to have Tobin’s prescription for Ambien filled and pick up dinner before heading to Tobin’s house. Tobin hesitantly enters her house, crutching slowly, looking around, trying to feel if she senses anything. Alex doesn’t notice as she’s busy pulling Tobin’s suitcase in while balancing the bag of food in one hand. She’s chattering away, talking about the progress she’s made on the research, how she thought the rum runner was actually not all that bad, not the gangster the press was making him out to be. She turns and finds Tobin just standing there, in the living room, her head craned up looking at the second floor landing. “You okay, Click?” Alex calls out, glancing around, not feeling any type of presence. “Oh,” Tobin’s head snaps towards Alex, giving her a small smile, “yeah, totally.” She drops her backpack off on the end of the kitchen table, crutches to the kitchen, opening the bag on the counter, removing their items as Alex grabs her suitcase and her own backpack and wheels it down the hallway. In Tobin’s room, Alex sets up the GoPro she brought over, readying it to record their sleep. She’s very interested in seeing what occurs. They have a leisurely dinner, sitting on the couch, watching TV, talking about Alex’s big meeting the next night. “So, I’ll probably just stay at my place, if that’s fine?” Alex repeats herself, really wanting to make sure Tobin would be okay on her own for the evening. She feels the cleansing did a good job, she’s just not sure if every spirit is gone. She;s not sure what to think, she hasn’t ever done anything like this before. A cleansing or actually engaging in spirits other than a conversation. She hasn’t felt a presence here except for Ellie, the gangster and the gentleman in the study. Tobin should be fine. “Oh, yeah, I’ll be fine,” Tobin reassures her, “your meetings seriously last until almost midnight though?” she questions her, grinning. “Yep.” Alex nods, “It’s the yearly meeting to plan and market the events of 2018. So, it’s kind of a big deal.” “Gotcha,” Tobin nods her head repeatedly. “Seriously, I’ll be fine. I’ll probably just chill, go to bed early.” She sighs dramatically, “Alone.” Alex laughs, “Well, you won’t go alone to bed tonight.” She says, wiggling her eyebrows at her. “And for that I am very grateful.” Tobin smiles, leaning over to kiss her lips. When Alex leaves the bed to use the bathroom after having some mind blowing sex, she stops and turns the camera on. There was no way she would record themselves being intimate. Tobin fell asleep only minutes after they were done, the Ambien kicking in and making her pass out. January 23, 2018 Alex sets up at Tobin’s desk with Mrs. Stark’s materials, not wanting to work on Tobin’s house items here. She finds another small note, on Tobin’s desk, red lip prints on paper simply with the word ‘Amore’. She slides it out of her way, briefly wondering if Tobin is leaving these for her to find. It’s the second time she’s found one like that. She’s confused about it. It would be out of character for her do that, especially since she’s never called her Amore. She’ll wait for Tobin to bring it up, knowing that she if she did it, she would want to know Alex’s reaction. She soon gets to work, engrossed in the material, writing notes in her notebook, carefully reading the papers and viewing the photos. Since she has an impressive memory, she rarely uses her computer until she makes her rough draft of her report. Right now, she uses it to quickly fast forward through the night to see if Tobin had any sleep issues. She didn’t, seemingly to sleep just fine, so she erases the memory card and makes a note to set it up for tonight. Maybe sleeping alone, Tobin will dream. She then accesses the Historical Society website so she can retrieve document titles to make notes to look them up and check them out on the premises. The ones she’s looking for are on microfilm and haven’t been scanned for use on the website yet. Tobin’s plan for the morning was to do her therapy, which consists of a series positional leg lifts seeing as she’s still non-weight bearing and then putting away her clothes from LA. The day before she left, she did her laundry so she wouldn’t have to do here. She finds her house notebook and pulls up the Thorns tentative training schedule and studies it closely as she sits at the kitchen table. She won’t make the full pre-season, but she hopes to get in at least one or two games. She hopes and prays her therapy goes smoothly and she is pain free. It’s only nine-thirty so she retrieves her Bible and reads it on the couch for an hour and then shifts to her wood working book she got from Jeffrey. She wants to make a bar cart, so she begins to sketch out designs with the features she likes from the different carts in the book. She thinks it would look awesome in the living room, near the upright metal wine rack and just be super cool. She knows with therapy and then preseason, she won’t have a ton of time to work on house stuff or do anything much at all. She wants to talk to Alex about that and explain just what her days are like during the beginning of the season. She wants to make sure she clearly communicates with her and there aren’t any unmet expectations that they never discussed. She just wants to do it right with her. Cheney calls her just before lunch and they have a great conversation getting caught up. Lauren’s recovery from her surgery is moving slowly but that was to be expected. She still wears her patch, it helps her eye grow stronger and keep her balance. Alex wanders out before they finish, Tobin eagerly patting the couch cushion for her to sit down next to her. “Alex!” She exclaims, smiling at her, “I want you to meet Cheney.” Alex sits, peering in to Tobin’s phone. “Hi,” she greets, giving her a little wave. “Hi Alex, I’m Lauren,” Cheney says, smiling at her, “I’ve heard wonderful things about you, it’s so nice to meet you.” “Thanks,” Alex says quietly, suddenly shy, “it’s very nice to meet you as well.” “Hey,” Lauren shifts her phone as she reaches for something, she holds up Alex’s book, “this is terrific. I’m almost finished. It’s amazing how much he accomplished at such a young age.” Alex’s mouth drops open, shocked that Lauren is reading her book, she slowly turns to Tobin, seeing her blushing furiously. “Thanks,” she says slowly, turning very slowly to face Lauren again. “Has Tobin the book critic been at it again?” she questions. Lauren chuckles, setting the book down, “She has.” “I was just telling Lauren my theory about how I think Irving would have been a great soccer coach.” Tobin smiles at her. Alex pulls back from her side, “Wait, what?” Tobin nods vigorously. “He saw the process of how films were made, studied the components, shook it upside down and made sense of it. Like, how a coach would look at tactics and how to change from the first half to the second. Become more efficient. Or how a coach would organize and structure practices.” Lauren is giggling at Tobin and how serious she is right now. “Alex,” she says, Alex turns to face her, “if you haven’t figured it out yet, it all comes back to soccer with this one.” Alex laughs, “Yeah, I guess it does,” she shakes her head at Tobin and then impulsively kisses her cheek, “babe, I’ve never heard my book broken down that way, that is very impressive.” She tries to hold back her smirk. “Listen, I’ve got to run, the sitter is here and it’s gym time.” Lauren says, standing up and walking with her phone, “Alex it was very nice to meet you, I hope to see you in May when I come visit.” “Nice to meet you as well, Lauren,” Alex smiles, “I look forward to seeing you then.” “Love you, Tobs,” Lauren smiles. “Thanks, Chen, love you, too.” Tobin smiles back and they disconnect. They have a light lunch, Tobin was going to eat her leftovers from last night for dinner and Alex would be eating at her work function. They agree that a nap would be necessary and Alex says she’ll join her in an hour. Tobin replies that she’s going to check in with her Mom and Perry and maybe call Allie. When Alex sits back down at the desk in the study, she notices the note from earlier is gone. She doesn’t remember Tobin coming in here, although she did use the bathroom before they ate lunch. She’s trying not to be suspicious, but she feels something is off. Tempted to go back to the living room and confront her, Alex resists. She doesn’t want to come across as being insecure and clingy. It was just some random note, nothing more, right? She takes a deep breath, notes the time and gets back into Mrs. Stark’s paperwork. Tobin sighs as she snuggles under the blanket, she loves taking naps. It refreshes her, makes her feel balanced and well rested. She takes a couple of deep breaths, relaxing her body and lets herself drift off knowing Alex will be joining her soon. She feels a weight on her lap, the blanket being pressed against her shoulders, holding her down into the couch cushions, she opens her eyes, expecting to see a grinning Alex only to find green eyes blazing at her. “Amore, you should know by now that you are mine,” the dark woman says, her voice having an edge to it. She leans forward and down to kiss Tobin’s lips. Tobin pulls away, moving her head, “No, I’m with Alex.” she says firmly, “I can’t be with you,” The woman continues to kiss Tobin’s neck, grinding her hips on Tobin, as Tobin struggles to fight the blanket off her. “Stop!” she exclaims, “I’m with Lex, I want her, not you.” The woman pulls back her head to look Tobin in the eyes, “You will be mine. I have my ways.” She says quietly, angrily. “Lex!” Tobin calls, out. This is a dream, a bad dream, Alex will come, Tobin thinks as she calls for her. “Lex!” Alex thinks she hears Tobin calling her as she looks up from the papers on the desk. She glances at the computer screen seeing as it’s almost time to join her for a nap. “Tobin?” she calls as she pushes the chair back and stands. She heads down the hall, hearing Tobin’s low voice, it sounds upset. Alex sees Tobin’s crutches sitting on the kitchen table, wondering how they got there as she circles around to the couch. Tobin’s head is moving side to side, her arms moving under the blanket that is tucked tightly under her. “Lex!” She’s crying, “Lex!” Her voice rising as she struggles under the blanket, panic beginning to register. “I’m here, I’m here,” Alex replies, pulling the blanket from under her, sitting on the edge of the couch. “It’s alright, I’m here,” she says, watching as Tobin’s eye flutter open. “Lex!” She cries as she sees her, reaching out, Alex bending down to hold her and pull her up to sit. “Sssshhhh,” Alex comforts, rocking her slowly in her arms, “it’s okay, calm down, it was just a dream.” She feels Tobin nodding as she sniffles, pulling back a bit to look at her. “They wanted me to do something I didn’t want to do,” She says miserably, “I kept saying no but they got mad.” Alex nods, “Okay,” she says, reaching out and holding Tobin’s hand. Tobin wipes her eyes with her free hand, looking around. “They were mad,” “Do you know who it was?” Alex asks, watching Tobin shake her head. “I don’t remember,” She confesses. “Scoot over,” Alex commands. Twisting so she can lay on the couch and hold Tobin, she covers them with the blanket. “Do you remember what they wanted you to do?” “No,” Tobin sighs, “I don’t.” “That’s okay, it happens with dreams,” Alex reassures her. “Am I like, going psycho or something?” Tobin looks at her fearfully. “No, babe, you aren’t.” Alex replies, hugging her close, “You’re just having some sleep issues.” Tobin sighs, “This sucks.” She wants to tell Alex about this, it’s vaguely coming back to her, the woman being mean to her, but she doesn’t remember why. They’ll talk tomorrow, she doesn’t want to get into it now, not when Alex has her meeting tonight. If they start talking, Alex might want to skip her meeting and Tobin doesn’t want to keep her from her work. She’s too devoted to it. “I’m sorry.” Alex says genuinely. “I’ll call Syd and Jamie and Karen and see when we can do another cleansing, okay?” “Yeah,” Tobin says, turning her head to give her a kiss, “thanks.” “Just snuggle with me,” Alex suggests, thinking that maybe her holding her will let her relax and not dream. “I can skip my meeting,” Alex repeats, concerned about leaving Tobin alone. Tobin waves her off again. “I appreciate the sentiment, but no. You have to do your work stuff.” She says, “I’ll be fine. Just chill for a while, pop a pill and go to sleep.” She smiles at her, hugging her. “Are you sure?” Alex asks, feeling torn about going. “I mean, you can hang out at my place if you want.” “It’s fine,” Tobin insists, not wanting Alex to really know just how nervous she is about being here. She doesn’t want to distract her from her meeting and everything. “Tonight, I’ll dream of you and all the things I want to do to you and with you.” She finishes, her voice dropping lower, kissing her passionately. “Okay, that’s not fair,” Alex complains when they break free, “you can’t get me all hot and bothered and then I have to leave.” “It will make tomorrow morning more exciting when you come back.” Tobin wiggles her eyebrows. Alex slaps her arm, retrieving her bag and giving her a quick kiss. “I’ll text you on our breaks.” Before she left, Alex had made sure to turn the GoPro on. “I look forward to it,” Tobin smiles. Tobin has just swallowed her pill and is walking to her bed from the bathroom when her phone chirps on the nightstand. She slides under the covers, grabbing her phone and shutting off her light. She squints at the photo Alex sent her. Lex: How’s it going?Click: Fine, just took a pill and am in bed. What is that thing?Lex: Our next topic: Victorian Era Sex Toys. Click: ???????? Seriously????Lex: Yep. Exhibit A: doctor prescribed relief from hysteria.Click: That’s so wrong, it looks HUGE!Lex: Check this one out.She sends another image of a steam powered vibrator. Click: WTH? Lex: Getting horny yet? Click: Uh, nooooooooLex: How about this? She sends a photo of herself, obviously taken in a bathroom stall, her shirt off, biting her lower lip, cupping a breast over her lacy bra with her eyes smoldering, staring seductively at the camera. Tobin stares at it, her mouth open. Lex: What about now?Click: …Lex: ???Click: You’re so fucking hot, LexLex: I see my work here is done. Click: You’re so not fair. Lex: Ever try one?Click: one what?Lex: a dildo or a strap on? Click: nahLex: ??? Lex: not into it or??Click: uh, I was never with someone who wanted to. Lex: You want to? Holy fuck, Tobin thinks as she lays there, is this girl for real? What do I say? She’s never really played with any type of toy in the bedroom. Ever. Click: I’m willing to try anything with you. Tobin smiles, thinking that was a perfect response. Alex doesn’t text back. A couple of minutes go by. Lex: check your email. Goodnight, lover. Click: uh, goodnight, see you in the a.m. Tobin flicks over to her emails, seeing a new one. Alex had forwarded her an Amazon confirmation of an order. Tobin opens it. Her mouth drops open again. Holy shit. She instinctively looks around, as if someone could possibly be watching her and seeing what’s on her screen. She’s feeling a little drowsy as she reads the description of how the Feeldoe pleasures both users and she unconsciously brings her legs together, feeling an excitement build within herself. Oh man, what have I gotten myself into, she nervously wonders. I’ll just tell her I’ve never used a dildo or did anything like this, that’s all. She’ll be cool with it, we’ll take it slow. This will be fun. I wonder if it hurts, she shrugs, remembering some of her close friends in high school and college confessing to her when they had sex for the first time. About half of them had a great time, the other, it wasn’t so great. The difference is, I’m with Lex and she cares about me and won’t hurt me, Tobin reassures herself. She sets her phone on her nightstand and rolls over to sleep. Tobin typically sleeps on her stomach or her side when she’s really out, and right now, she’s on her stomach, dead to the world. She feels pressure on her back, her hair being moved to expose the back of her neck, lips sucking on the soft skin. “Babe?” she asks, dazedly, eyes still closed. “Hey, baby,” Alex purrs, biting her neck and then sucking over it. “You didn’t stay at your house?” Tobin asks sleepily. “We got out early,” Alex replies, her voice low, full of want, “and I want you.” She feels Alex’s hand slide under her, so she raises her side so Alex can access her breast. She’s cupping it firmly, squeezing, her hips on Tobin’s ass, moving slowly in long thrusts. She can feel Alex’s taut, hard nipples on her back and feels something between Alex’s legs, it’s riding up her ass and it feels good, she’s never felt something like that before. Alex keeps working at Tobin’s neck, sucking hard on the back of it, biting it intermittently. “Roll over,” Alex commands breathlessly, Tobin obeying quickly. Tobin glances down and sees Alex, naked and the flesh tone dildo hanging between her legs. “How did you get it so fast?” Tobin wonders, “You just ordered it.” Alex smirks at her, “I stopped at a store on my way here,” she kisses her deeply, “I couldn’t wait.” Tobin looks at it fearfully, “Lex, I’ve, um, like, I’ve never,” she begins as her throat goes dry. “Never played with one?” Alex asks, a smile playing at her lips before kissing her again, then moving to bite her collarbone. Her free hand snakes down under her shorts and begins to play with Tobin’s clit. “Ah!” Tobin gasps, “I’ve never, no,” she says, her hips arching at the sensation.“Like, ever?” Alex questions, now beginning to softly stroke her with the dildo. “Oh!” Tobin moans, “No,” she pants, “Never.”“These need to come off,” Alex says as she lowers the shorts from Tobin, Tobin lifting her hips and watching them slide down her legs and get flung to the floor. Same for her shirt. Alex leans forward, kissing her deeply, “I’ll be gentle,” she smiles at her, “Okay?” “I trust you,” Tobin nods, watching as Alex lowers herself in between her legs and starts sucking on her clit. “Uh,” Tobin gaps, instinctively rising forward, her hand lightly holding Alex’s head, “that feels so good,” she moans lying back. Her hips begin to move, rising to meet Alex’s tongue, losing herself in the sensation. Alex pulls away, two fingers circling her clit and then dropping down and circling her opening. She moves up and leans on one elbow, sucking on Tobin’s breast, circling it with her tongue and then taking the nipple in her mouth, raking her teeth across it, sucking it hard. “Mmmm,” Tobin purrs, her back arching, feeling Alex’s hand leave her and the cold touch of the rubber cock. She tightens up, suddenly nervous, Alex feeling it. “It’s okay,” Alex coos, “I won’t hurt you,” she says, kissing her neck, then her mouth. “Just relax,” she says, moving back on her knees in between Tobin’s legs as she slowly prods Tobin’s opening, separating the folds and nudging her open. Tobin feels her legs spread wide, knees and heels in the air as the cock enters her for the first time. She feels like she’s being broken open, the rings within her resisting the persistence of the cock, trying to close and fend it off. “Aaahhh,” She cries, “slow,” she pants. Alex stops, letting her get used to the feel, only moving slightly. “Just relax, baby,” she whispers, leaning forward and kissing her, one hand massaging her breast. She moves her hand to circle Tobin’s clit, their kissing escalating as she withdraws the cock. Alex drops back on her knees, still rubbing her fingertips through Tobin and now brings her tongue to her, placing a long lick against her, circling her opening with her tongue. She guides a finger into to her, slowly circling her opening, stretching it with every pass. She adds another finger as Tobin moans under her, her hips gliding in rhythm with her movements. She adds a third finger, stretching her even more, pulling the wetness from her, coating the sides and spreading it around. She gets back on her knees, rubbing the cock against her. Coating it in her juices and then slowly entering her. Tobin’s gripping the comforter, “Uhhmmm,” a high pitched moan escapes her lips as Alex pushes deeper. This time Tobin feels herself accepting the member as it glides through her rings, breathing deeply, feeling them open with each exhale, the cocking going deeper with each breath. Alex is only half in her when she pauses, “You okay?” her tone concerned.“Just go slow,” Tobin’s voice is shaky, her head back, eyes closed, teeth biting down on her lower lip. Alex leans forward so she’s on top of her, her arms along her sides as Tobin brings her arms up to hold her close. Alex moves slowly, bringing her head down to tenderly kiss Tobin as she begins to slowly thrust into her. “Oh, Lex,” Tobin moans, holding her tightly.“You okay?” Alex whispers, her breath hot on Tobin’s ear. “It’s amazing,” Tobin pants, her hips slowly moving with her. “Uh,” she moans as she begins to meet the thrusts. The cock keeps hitting her in that spot, the one that sends her toes curling and the hair on the back of her neck on end. It’s an easy pace, Alex slowly rocking in to her, maybe only using half the cock. It feels wonderful, gliding in her with this delicious resistance, making her head swim. Their panting is growing louder, matching their inhales and exhales. “You feel so good, baby,” Alex whispers into Tobin’s ear, moving to kiss just under her lobe. Tobin shudders, holding her tightly against her, feeling their breasts slide against each other, both of them beginning to sweat. Alex moves her head down and slowly licks Tobin’s nipple, toying with it, just skimming around before taking it in her mouth. She sucks on it as she increases her pace. Tobin shuts her eyes, throwing her head back as she revels in the feeling, she’s breathing hard as she feels her orgasm rising, the heat spreading throughout her body. She feels as Alex begins to enter her even harder, her mouth not leaving her breast, her hands finding Tobin’s and bringing them up against her head, holding her to the mattress, their fingers interlocking. Her strokes become rougher, harder, deeper, making Tobin gasp and moan with each thrust. Alex bites her nipple hard, making Tobin cry out, pulling on it, making Tobin arch her back in pain. “Lex, slow down,” She says, panting, this isn’t feeling good anymore. It’s beginning to hurt. She tries to move her hands but she’s holding her down. “Lex!” she yells, “Stop! It hurts!” “I’m ready to share my secret with you, Amore.”The French accent makes Tobin’s eyes shoot open, seeing green ones staring back at her. “No!” she screams, trying to fight free. She can’t move her arms, her legs frozen in place. The looks down and sees the cock between her legs, moving faster as it enters her. It’s real and not some toy. Holy fuck! The cock is turning cold, it feels larger than ever, the thrusts hurting her, it’s too rough. “NO, stop! Please!” “You’re mine now, lover, no turning back.” The dark haired woman says, her lips curling into a smile as she throws her head back, hips moving, pushing hard into Tobin, moaning and panting as she works herself towards her own release. “Lex!” Tobin cries, “Lex!” she screams, “Wake me up!” she trying to fight but her arms and legs won’t move, as if she’s paralyzed. She winces with each thrust, crying out, the pain intensifying, the cock growing colder yet somehow burning her. She’s never felt pain like this. It’s deep within her, radiating out towards her hips. The dark haired woman is working her over, entering her fast, pushing the entire cock in and withdrawing quickly as she harshly grabs Tobin’s breast, twisting and pulling on her nipple making her yelp in pain. It seems like it goes on forever, she hears skin hitting skin, moaning and gasping with each thrust, not in pleasure, but in pain. Tears are running from her eyes down the sides of her head, she feels the wetness in her ears. Finally, with one, two, three quick thrusts and then a long, drawn out moan from the dark haired woman and a sharp thrust into her, Tobin screams feeling ice within her. She lays on top of Tobin, catching her breath, placing cold kisses on the skin of her neck. Tobin is shaking, terrified this happening. “Lex!” Tobin sobs, “Make it stop!” she cries, her head twisting into the pillow. The weight of the woman disappears from her and she realizes she can move and turns to her side, hands in between her legs, holding herself just above her crotch. The woman is gone, leaving Tobin writhing and shuddering with the pain, crying out, “Lex!” as she sobs and curling herself into a tight ball. January 24, 2018 She doesn’t know when she fell asleep or if she slept at all. Tobin just lays there, not moving, still in the fetal position. She’s no longer in such intense pain, only feeling a soreness she’s never felt before in between her legs. She’s alone in the bed but she woke feeling certain she would be before even moving her hand behind her, feeling next to her. She slowly stretches out, the pain in her lower abdomen only a dull ache, turning on her back, letting out a deep breath. Something has to happen. This cannot go on. She feels like she’s out of her mind. This time, she remembers everything. Was she, like, raped by a ghost? Or was it only a dream? Just an incredibly vivid, disturbing dream? If so, why was this happening? Was it triggered by their texting last night? Did it trigger something deep within her, like a deep seated fear of that type of intimacy?She feels violated, wondering if she should pack up some clothes and meet Alex at her house. Or just get a hotel room somewhere. How does she even begin to have a conversation with Alex about this, she wonders. ‘Hey, so, I think this ghost is having sex with me in my dreams and it’s getting out of hand,’ she shakes her head at that. Or maybe, ‘Yo, Lex, what are your thoughts on ghost sex?’She lets out a frustrated sigh, stretching her arms and legs out, yawning because she’s still just so tired. She moves the comforter from herself, finding herself naked, no surprise there, she glances down and sees a bitemark on her breast, her nipple looks swollen. She’s trying to hold back the tears, holding her breast, it’s tender to touch, curling up in the bed holding herself because the reality of what happened is completely insane. After some time passes, she grabs her crutches and leaves the room for the bathroom to shower. She sobs, sitting on her shower chair, holding her head in her hands as the jets blast hot water on her, hoping that this next house cleansing will get rid of that woman. Praying that Alex will understand just how scared she’s become, fearful of the next time she goes to bed. She’s got to tell her, this has to stop. This is crazy. She feels so out of control. Alex comes in to Tobin’s house through the front door, smiling and wondering if she’s up yet. She sees a beautiful floral arrangement on the kitchen island and pauses to smell them before setting down her book bag and purse next to Tobin’s backpack on the kitchen table. She hears a low hum throughout the house, it’s a new sound and it kind of annoys her. Wondering what it could be, she walks into the bedroom, seeing the comforter tossed almost completely off the bed. She grabs her GoPro, shutting it off and then hears the faint sounds of the shower. She grabs the comforter, pulling it on the bed, noting the messy sheets and the now distinct scent of sex. Okay, she reasons, maybe she was really turned on by our texting last night. Maybe she was just having a little one on one time with herself. I’m guilty of it, we all do it, it’s natural. She decides to hang out in the living room or the kitchen and wait. She puts her GoPro back in her backpack. She’s nervous, she feels like something awful is going to happen. A strong headache is brewing and making her queasy. There’s an electricity in the air that’s full of tension and it’s making her anxious. She doesn’t exactly feel a presence, this is something she’s never felt before. A minute later she hears Tobin thumping down the hallway, her hair half dried and pulled in a pony tail. She’s wearing her joggers and a t-shirt. It’s her face that shocks Alex. She looks pale, exhausted, and very serious. “Hey,” Tobin greets her, giving her a subdued smile. She sits down next to her on the couch, leaning over to give her a quick kiss. “What’s going on?” Alex asks, eying her nervously. Tobin takes her hand, Alex feels it’s ice cold and gives it a squeeze. Tobin turns her head to face her, “Lex, do you think my house is…haunted?” she asks her, her voice trembling. Alex sighs, a little bit with relief that she feels confident she can share herself with Tobin. Even if it makes her nervous as Hell. “I do,” she replies quietly. Tobin leans back on the couch, her face twisting with emotions. She takes a deep breath. “Can you feel them?” “I can,” Alex replies with a nod. Tobin closes her eyes. Their hands are still linked together. “Can you…see them?” Tobin asks, her voice near a whisper. Alex twists her body to face Tobin, “I do.” She says, watching Tobin’s eyes open to look at her. Tobin tilts her head to look at her intently. “Have you always seen them or?” she questions, there’s no flash of judgement, or even any actual surprise that Alex can register on Tobin’s face. She’s accepting it, she thinks. “No, not until after my car accident in college.” Alex states, trying to keep herself calm. “What happened?” Tobin asks, shifting to face her as well. “The crash was bad, like, really bad.” She explains. “The car blew a red light, hit another car and then hit us head on. They thought we were both dead but one of the paramedics found my pulse, as faint as it was.” She says. “I had a horrible head injury, needed surgery, there was brain swelling and they had to go in and relieve it. I had a broken pelvis, ribs, leg. I was a mess.” “Babe,” Tobin says tenderly. Alex nods, “Yeah, it was pretty touch and go there for a while. I officially died twice on the operating table. Although they declared the surgeries successful, I wasn’t out of the woods. I was in an induced coma for a week, slowly coming out of it, unable to talk because I was on a ventilator, but seeing my room filled with strangers. It was pretty wild.” Tobin makes a sympathetic noise, squeezing her hand. “When I became more lucid and was off the vent, the fun began. I was seeing dead family members who were asking me to tell my Mom and Dad things and they thought I was out of my mind. I saw my best friend and we spoke like nothing was wrong even though they told me she had died in the accident. I had a few more surgeries, on my leg and pelvis, and after that, I was still seeing these people.” She sighs, playing with Tobin’s fingers, “It took a few months and a lot of therapy to understand what had happened and what I was capable of seeing.” “That had to have been so hard,” Tobin murmurs, clenching her fingers around Alex’s. Alex nods, “It was.” She agrees, “But, after time, I got used to it.” “So,” Tobin begins slowly, “do you, like, talk to them and help them cross over and stuff?” Alex shakes her head, “I’m not, like, a Ghostbuster or these ghost hunters on TV.” She says, “I just see them mostly, I try not to let them know I know. I just ignore a lot of them. Sometimes I talk to them, become friendly, you could say,” she says, thinking about her friends at the Historical Society. Tobin nods. She’s biting her lower lip, thinking. “What do you think about this?” Alex asks carefully. She needs to hear her opinion on this. “Well,” Tobin says, “I guess I kinda thought you could feel something during the cleansing, so it’s not too surprising.” She says. “Do you think it’s weird, or I’m weird?” Alex asks, her tone rising with nervousness. Tobin looks at her quickly, shaking her head. “No, not at all.” She says, her wide. “This doesn’t make me think any different about you. I swear.” Alex nods, emotions and relief rising. “Lex,” Tobin says, shaking their joined hands a little, “I think the brain has so many capabilities that some people just might be born with being able to feel stuff, you know? And maybe in your case, your accident triggered something in you and now you can.” She says reassuringly. Alex smiles at her, leaning over to kiss her. “Thanks,” she says, tears welling in her eyes. “You were afraid to tell me?” Tobin asks quietly. Alex nods, “It’s not just, like, something I spring on everyone, you know?” she says, wiping her eyes. “I’ve lost some friends when they found out.” Tobin nods, looking down as her stomach grumbles. “I’m sorry you’ve had those experiences, Lex.” She says. Alex pats her leg, “Let’s get you something to eat, okay?” She says and gives her a quick smile. She relieved that it went so well. She knows they’ll talk more about it, but this is a very good first step. They get up, Tobin behind Alex as she crutches to the kitchen. Alex pauses to sniff the flowers, noticing the card and reading it. ‘Amore, Last night was amazing’Alex’s mouth drops open, turning to see Tobin looking in the fridge. When Tobin leans back holding the milk, Alex can clearly see a trail of hickeys on the back of her neck. What the fuck? She watches as Tobin sets the milk down, taking a deep breath and gripping the edge of the countertop. “Lex,” she says, “there’s something going on here and I’m not sure how to explain it to you.” There’s a nervousness to her voice and she’s not looking at her. “Do you want to start with who gave you the flowers?” Alex asks, her anger growing. Tobin’s head shoots up to look at her, mouth open, confused by her tone. “Cheney,” she says quickly. “I got them last night.”“Oh really?” Alex says sarcastically, “Just how close are the two to you?” she asks, plucking the card from the arrangement and shoving it at her. Alex can see the confusion on Tobin’s face as she reads it. She looks up at her. “I don’t know where this came from or who wrote it.” She confesses. Alex nods taking a step closer to her, “And the hickeys on your neck?” She’s pissed now. Tobin’s hand grabs at her neck, “Hickeys?” she asks, her eyes are wide with fear. Alex takes it as fear of being caught. “Yeah, the fucking hickeys,” she says, reaching at her v-neck collar and pulling it down, “oh, she’s a biter as well, huh?” She says sarcastically. Tobin is shaking her head, she looks terrified, “Lex, I swear, it’s not like that,” “Really now?” Alex asks as she crosses her arms. She’s so pissed right now and this headache isn’t helping her any. Tobin’s nodding her head quickly. “Come on, I want to show you something,” she says, turning on her crutches to move to the pantry, she’s at the pantry door, pulling it open, “Please?” Alex huffs and follows her, watching as she quickly opens the first drawer, frantically looking for something with shaking hands. She pulls out an old photo of a woman, shoving it her. “It’s her.” She says, her voice trembling, she’s beginning to shake. Alex sees a beautiful woman with dark curly hair. She sets the photo down. Tobin holds her forehead with her hand, looking down, “She comes to me in my dreams sometimes, she might be the one who’s always there, but I don’t always remember.” Her breathing is growing rapid as she gets more upset. “Last night it was you and then it turned into her and she has a fucking dick and she raped me,” she says, tears spilling over. Alex is only seeing red at this point, her head is pounding. Tobin drops her hand and turns to her, “I think she’s a ghost,” she says unsteadily, “I tried to fight her, but I couldn’t move, I kept telling her I only wanted you, she kept saying she could share her secret with me.” She’s crying now. “Can you see her? Is she here?” This is how you’re gonna play out cheating on me, Alex thinks, shaking her head in anger. “I shared something very private with you just minutes ago and this is how you’re gonna throw it back in my face? Fuck you, Tobin!” she says, marching out from the pantry. She hears the thump of the crutches. “Lex!” Tobin’s calling out, her voice panicked. “I swear, I’m not a cheater!” She’s hurriedly crutching behind her as Alex is getting her purse and bag from the kitchen table. “I swear, Lex! I’m telling the truth! I wouldn’t do that!” Alex turns to her, head cocked, “Oh, and the loves notes and the flowers and trashed bedroom smelling like sex and the hickeys and bitemarks are just from a ghost?” “Yes!” Tobin says loudly, nodding her head. She stops. She looks around. “Maybe she’s here, maybe you can see her. Maybe you can talk to her, get her to stop.” Enraged, Alex takes a step forward and slaps her across the face. “Fuck you, Tobin!” she yells, “Don’t patronize me! Just don’t. Fuck you!” She turns on her heel and walks briskly to the door. “Lex!” Tobin pleads, “Lex, I swear! Please, just listen to me!” she sobbing as she crutches behind her. “Please, don’t leave!” She shouts.Alex slams the door behind her.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Tobin stands, sobs racking her body, leaning on her crutches, halfway in the hallway to the door. She’s holding her hand to her cheek, still feeling the stinging slap from Alex. She’s silently crying, her body trembling, her mind still trying to wrap around what has just transpired. She can feel a thickness in the air, the tension surrounding her. The lights dim and flicker, making the hairs on the back of Tobin’s neck stand on end. Panic rises in her. I’ve got to get out of here, she thinks. Like, right now. She crutches to the table, her backpack is still on it from the night before. She grabs it when she hears a noise, twisting her head and watching in horror as the pull shades begin to quickly lower one by one in each window of the living room and kitchen. Her head swivels as each one is pulled down by unseen forces. Gulping, she grabs the strap of her backpack, crutching to the door as the drapes begin to shut, darkening the room. Not stopping to grabb a jacket or shoes or anything, her only thought is to get out now. She gets near the door when she’s slammed to the wall, her crutches falling away, backpack dropping to the floor. She’s on one foot as she feels hands at her neck. Her hands go to her throat, she’s trying to free herself but there’s nothing there. She’s gagging as the force begins to lift her from the floor, she’s on her toes of her left foot. Black spots begin to appear before her eyes as she loses oxygen. She’s dropped to the floor unceremoniously, panting furiously on her knees. She crawls to the door, coughing and gagging, kneeling and struggling to open it. It won’t open. Breathing heavy, she crawls the length of the house down the hallway to the back door, scrambling across the wooden floor. She’s kneeling as she tries to open it, failing to do so. She’s sobbing, leaning against the door. This is insane. Maybe I’m dreaming, maybe this is all a dream, she thinks. I don’t care of it’s a fucking dream, she thinks, I got to get out, I got to get out. I’ve. Got. To. Get. Out.The basement, she thinks, the side door. She scrambles down the stairs, crab walking down it, crawling to the side door. There’s a loud hum emanating from the house. She can’t figure out where it’s coming from. She’s on the hard, cold cement floor, panting as she leans against the door that won’t open. The noise is growing louder and getting higher in pitch. She holds her hands to her ears, crying as she tries to get the noise out of her head. The lights go out, thrusting her into pitch blackness. A small cry of terror escapes from her lips. Impossibly loud screaming fills the room. Screams of fright, of agony. It forces Tobin to the ground, curled up, unable to move as the sounds paralyze her and the pressure gives her the worst headache she’s ever experienced. She screams in pain and terror. Alex nearly clips the gate as she drives out of Tobin’s driveway. Shaking with anger, her vision blurry from tears, she has to pull over so she can collect herself to drive safely. She doesn’t know where she’s going but she’s not shocked when she parks her car and sees she’s in front of Syd’s store. She wipes her eyes, tries to calm her breathing as she opens her door and makes her way in to the store. The small bells tinkle when she enters, immediately seeing Syd with a customer. Syd makes eye contact, her eyes going wide as she takes in Alex’s appearance, silently tilting her head to the backroom. Alex barely registers her, moving briskly through the store and entering the office. She goes immediately to the small fridge, opening it and pulling the chilled bottle of whiskey from it. She doesn’t even attempt to find a glass, instead just unscrewing the cap and taking a pull from the bottle. She slumps onto the sofa, shoving the bottle between her legs and bringing her hands to her face as she cries. Ten minutes later, Syd appears, stopping in the doorway to take in Alex. She’s curled up on the couch, a whiskey bottle between her legs, hands in her face, sobbing. Syd strides into the room, her concern at an all time high. She removes the bottle, placing it on the desk and sits down next to her. “Baby girl, what is wrong?” she questions as she puts her arm around her. Alex looks up at her, eyes red rimmed from tears, face pale with rosy cheeks from emotion. “She-she-she’s cheating on me!” she wails, leaning over onto Syd’s chest, sobbing. Syd wraps her other arm around her, closing her close. It takes Syd almost a half an hour to get Alex calmed down, then another twenty minutes before Alex could begin to speak about what had just occurred. Syd listens patiently, not asking questions, at one point grabbing a notepad and scribbling down a few things as Alex speaks. Once Alex finished speaking, Syd stands up, finds two glasses, pouring a whiskey for each of them and handing one to Alex. They both sips their drinks, a silence between them. “I’m sorry for barreling in here,” Alex says quietly, her voice nasally from crying. “Don’t worry. I closed the shop.” Syd waves her off. “Syd,” Alex argues, moving to get up. Syd firmly holds her forearm. “I had a good month, it’s no problem.” Syd states and that’s that. “Listen,” she says, taking a sip of her drink, “you don’t pull out the good stuff if something isn’t terribly wrong. And we don’t sit here day drinking unless that means we’re gonna
have a hard talk. So, I’m asking you to just listen to me, okay? As you explained everything, some things have popped into my head, and we need to discuss it. I need you to be as objective as you can about this.” Alex slowly nods. “First,” Syd says, crossing her legs, “in the time you’ve known Tobin and I’ve known Tobin, I’ve never had the sniff of a hint that she would ever cheat. Have you?” Alex shakes her head miserably. “Same here,” Syd says, “it’s like it’s just not in the fiber of her being.” “Second, you said it looked like she was terrified seeing the note from the flowers. You thought it was because she was caught, right?” Alex nods. “Let’s just look at a few things here, honey.” Syd says, looking down at her notebook. “We all know something is not right with her house. Even with that cleansing, we knew it.
Jamie knew it, you knew, I knew it.” Alex nods again. “It’s a pretty common occurrence for spiritual activity arise when a house is being renovated. What if, that was the trigger?” Sud asks, “What if that unleashed this spirit?” She shifts in her position. “What if the sleeping problems she is having is stemming from a spirit and not some anxiety issue?” Syd questions. Alex shakes her head, “Spirits don’t leave hickeys, Syd,” she says bitterly. “Oh, I think you might be wrong on that one there,” Syd says, pulling out her phone and looking up something. She hands her phone to Alex. “Read.” Alex reads what Syd found. Shaking her head and reading it again. She looks up. “A succubus?” Syd nods sagely, “Think about it, if Jamie felt this spirit, this female spirit, was responsible for her brother’s death, what would be a powerful motivator? Sex.” Alex looks at her, unconvinced. “Tobin was trying to tell you something about a ghost, coming in and having sex with her, wanting her to do things against her will. You said, that Tobin said, it would start as being you, in her dreams, then turn into her.” Alex just looks at her, the gears slowly beginning to churn. “What if, this spirit, has attached itself to Tobin and is methodically breaking her down? You said, she said it didn’t start until she found the photo. What if that was the start of it all? Maybe this spirit was tormenting her at night, not allowing her to get any proper sleep so she could slowly take over?” Alex lets her mouth drop open. “What if this spirit was manipulating her while she slept? Putting ideas in her head, confusing her, or making her so exhausted, like doing push ups for who knows how long at night, she wouldn’t be aware of what was happening until it’s too late?” “Oh my God,” Alex says slowly, the realization dawning on her. “Lex,” Syd says, her voice lowering, “what if this spirit was manipulating you as well? The notes, the feelings in the house, maybe the subliminal implant of her being a cheater.” “Oh, my God!” Alex exclaims, thinking about the weird hum and how she became so annoyed so fast this morning. She turns to Syd, “We’ve got to get her out of there!” Syd holds her arm again, “We’ve got to find out about her.” She says, “This spirit. We got to end this. We need you and your knowledge to find out everything we can about her.” “But Syd!” Alex exclaims, “She’s in danger, we’ve got to get her out of that house!” “Call Jamie and Karen,” Syd suggests, “have them check the place out, get her out of there.” “Good idea,” Alex nods, hands shaking as she pulls her phone out. “Jamie? I need help.” When she gets off the phone, she looks at Syd. “I’ll be right back.” She says, leaping from the couch and leaving the room. A few minutes later, she trots back in, backpack in hand. “I recorded her sleeping last night,” she explains, digging out her GoPro, looking up at Syd, “maybe we can see what happened.” Syd’s off the couch, leaving the office and entering holding her laptop. They both sit side by side on the couch, Alex loading the memory card. She’s fast forwarding through the beginning when the room is empty, watching a fast forward version of Tobin entering, heading to the bathroom, coming in and laying down looking at her phone. “Why does she look so embarrassed?” Syd asks, her lips curling a little. “Shut it,” Alex states. She keeps it going. “Stop!” Syd lays a hand on her forearm. “The comforter moved.” Alex backs up, and they play it. They both watch the monitor, the display of the noise patterns showing a voice that they can’t hear. Tobin is lying on her stomach, the comforter slowly moving down off of her. They watch as Tobin rolls over, speaking softly. They watch in horror as Tobin’s assault begins. Both are in tears as it ends. “Why didn’t she tell me?” Alex asks, her tear filled eyes still glued to the screen watching Tobin weeping as she faces the camera. “Why didn’t she tell me this was happening to her?” “Alex,” Syd says, her breath hitching, “honey, I’m sure that’s just as hard as telling someone you see ghosts.” Alex is quiet as she thinks about it. “Yeah,” she nods as she watches the screen. Tobin is screaming as the noise continues. She doesn’t realize it stops until she’s out of breath. Panting, she removes her hands from her ears, leaning up from the cold ground. The silence is deafening. She’s disoriented in the pitch black room. Where am I in here, she wonders, trying to find any source of light. There’s none. I should be by the side door still, she thinks as she slowly crawls along the floor. Finding a wall. Okay, let’s follow this and see if I can figure out what wall I’m on. She shuffles on her knees, trying to keep her casted foot off the floor. She feels a corner and moves around it.
She stops for a moment, trying to figure out where she’s at, when she hears it. A faint noise in the room. Chattering. She can’t tell if it’s people talking or something else. She starts moving, the noise is getting louder. It’s become a rapid cha-cha-cha-cha sound. Like insects. It’s on the ground and in the air beginning to surround her. She stumbles over tools, banging her knee, wincing in pain as she continues, hurrying now, because whatever is making the noise, is getting closer. She gets up, hopping as the sounds surround her. She feels something on her legs, crawling on them, she swipes at it, yelling out. She feels the hand rail for the stairs, breathing hard, strangled sounds of her terror coming from her as she moves. Her hands feel the spiders when she touches the stairs, crawling up as fast as she can. Spiders are dropping on her back, she feels the webs she’s breaking through each step as she climbs, getting in her face, the sticky webs wrapping up her arms, her knees banging off the stairs. The chattering of the spiders growing louder as they begin to swarm her. Relief floods through her as her hands feel the wood floor, pulling herself up. She’s nearly there when hands grab her ankles, pulling her down. She screams as she bounces her chin off the top stair, seeing stars briefly, struggling to move forward. She kicks wildly, freeing herself, crawling out of the stairwell, sliding across the floor and slamming the door. She’s trembling and crying, making a low hysterical noise as her hands slap herself to remove the spiders. She feels like they’re still on her. She takes off her shirt, her hands shaking badly. She gets up on her hands and knees, thinking she should throw a chair through a window, do something to get out of this house. She’s crawling to the kitchen when she smells the strong scent of violets. She stops in place, her breathing shallow and rapid, looking around although she can’t see anything in the darkness. She’s panting, breathing fast through her mouth. It’s so dark in the house one would think it was midnight. She knows it’s still day time, she wasn’t in the basement that long. She doesn’t truly have any conception of time right now. She starts crawling again, her hand feeling a chair leg, holding on to it, grasping it as if her life depended on it. She hears a sinister laugh, approaching her from behind. “No, no, no, no,” she chants, grabbing the chair and swinging it wildly as she’s on her knees. The chair is yanked from her hands, clattering loudly on the hardwood floor.A hand grabs her ponytail, pulling her head back viciously. She screams. “I’m pretty sure her name is Christen Press. I’ve only now just started finding papers on her. They’re from the crates Tobin brought down from the turret room.” Alex explains, moving through her living room, opening the crates as Syd follows. Syd insisted on helping her, claiming two sets of eyes would make it go faster. “We need to find out about her life, her personality, what her issues were.” Syd states. “I’ll get started over here, this was where I was working before.” Alex states as she positions herself at the sofa, the coffee table cluttered with papers. “I’ll take this crate,” Syd offers, dragging it to the kitchen table, “do you have some paper?” “Over there,” Alex gestures to her kitchen counter. They get to work. Alex’s phone chirps. She grabs it. “Jamie? Did you get her?” Syd watches as Alex’s hopeful expression changes into sadness. “No,” she says, “she’s not there?” She listens. “Can you come here, to my place? We need help getting info on that bitch.” She nodding as she listens. “It is.” She says. “It was terrible.” She nods as a tear slides down her face. “I’ll text it.” She says. She switches screens and sets her phone down, picking up a paper and scanning it. “Well?” Syd questions, looking at her expectantly. “The house is completely dark and quiet.” Alex explains, her voice clipped, “They couldn’t see in, they couldn’t hear anything. Tobin’s car is still there.” “So, she may be somewhere else?” Syd asks. Alex nods, “Maybe. She can’t drive right now, anyway. Maybe she took an Uber somewhere.” She says, distracted as she reads. “Jamie and Karen are texting her now.” Tobin’s whimpering as she rises from the floor, the hand firmly holding her hair. She’s whimpering with every breath, terror filling her very soul. “Amore,” the gentle French accent close to her ear, “I told you I would have you, please, just say yes.” “No, no, no,” Tobin chants, her voice shaky, her throat so dry. She’s so scared. She hears a regretful sigh, “Then you must learn some more lessons of my power,” Tobin feels her hair being released, instantly crumpling to the ground. The presence is still behind her, she can feel it, anger radiating towards her. There’s a pressure building in the room, she’s yawning, trying to pop her ears, she feels off balance. A piercing tone fills the room, bringing Tobin to the floor, holding her ears. The room begins to spin, she’s struggling to stay upright. She’s bent over, forehead on the floor, panting as she tries to catch her breath. Her eyes flutter as she fights against this force, but she knows it’s a losing battle. She feels herself falling to her side, lying on the floor. She closes her eyes seeing a kaleidoscope of colors swirling, twisting, she can hear her heartbeat in her ears. Thumping loudly then fading as she passes out. When Jamie and Karen arrive, Syd gives them a brief rundown of who and what they’re looking for. They get to work immediately, Karen going to the third crate and Jamie opening the steamer trunk. “We need a photo identifying her as being Christen.” Alex states, grabbing another stack of papers. “That’s the key.” They all nod and get to work. An hour goes by, each woman feverishly looking through the piles of papers from their respective crate and trunk. “I’ve got a bunch of stuff here on this bootlegger,” Karen comments. “I’m not seeing anything about a female here.” She says, slightly discouraged. “Come on over here and help me,” Jamie says, “I’ve found some stuff about Christen being charged for murder but I haven’t found a photo yet.” Alex looks up, “Let me see the murder stuff, okay?” she asks from the couch, “I’ve got some as well.” Syd is making a face, “I don’t know what the Hell I’ve got here,” she says, rubbing the back of her neck, “it’s a journal, with no name, so I don’t know the owner,” “What’s it saying?” Alex asks. “Talking about how she loves someone, who she doesn’t name, and thinks she’s pregnant.” Syd shrugs. “Keep reading,” Alex urges, “something might turn up. Look at the dates, see if they are during the time of Press being in the house. She owned it from 1923 until 1930.” Syd tilts her head at her. “Press ran a high end brothel, from what I can tell. That might be one of the working girls.” She explains. “I really think that’s her,” Jamie comments as she sifts through her papers. “Why, hon?” Karen asks. “Well, if she was in the sex trade, so to speak, it would make sense that she’s using sex as a manipulation now.” “Huh,” Syd says, “even though we’re talking about a ghost, that sounds pretty logical.” They keep working, murmuring to each other about their latest findings. Each one keeps texting Tobin or calling Tobin, trying to get a hold of her. After another hour, they huddle around the kitchen table, their notes assembled. “She comes from New Orleans in 1923 and buys this house.” Alex states. “The first known mention of her business comes in 1927.” “So, what did she do in those years in between?” Karen asks. “I have no clue.” Alex shakes her head. “In 1928, she’s mentioned as being raided by the Police but the lack of evidence makes the charges go away.” Syd says, looking down at her notes. “Plus, they had like, a Red Light District where it was legal.” Alex states, “She was out of the boundaries a little but maybe she bribed an official or something.” “Prostitution was legal back then?” Karen asks, looking up, her eyebrows raised. Alex nods, “Under controlled rules. Brothels. They paid taxes, generated money for the city so it was on the up and up for them.” “Hers seemed pretty high class,” Jamie adds, waving a little postcard. It’s an invitation for an event being held that eludes to the stable of pretty women available for dancing and more. “So, for three years everything is fine but then she’s charged for murder?” Syd muses, “What happened?” “It’s gotta be here. There’s more to it than this article.” Alex states. “we gotta find it, I feel like it’s the key to this whole thing.” Tobin wakes in bed, snuggled under the covers, Alex holding her. She flinches away from her. Alex grabs at her, “It’s okay, you’re safe.” She comforts. “Is it really you?” Tobin questions, squinting at her. She reaches out and pinches her. “Ow!” Alex exclaims, hand on her thigh. “You’re real,” Tobin breathes out in relief. “It was all a bad dream?” Alex nods, snuggling against her, “I found you by the front door.” She says, tenderly kissing the top of her head. “You were crying about me leaving.” “What time is it?” Tobin asks, “What day is it?” “It’s Thursday, January 25th.” Alex replies, holding her a little tighter. “I’ve been here awhile and we were napping. I heard you yelling and found you by the front door.” “We didn’t fight?” Tobin asks, she’s so confused right now.Alex shakes her head, “No,” she says quietly, kissing her cheek, “we didn’t fight. You were dreaming.” “It was a dream?” Tobin says, I can’t believe it, it was so real. Everything was so incredibly real. “It was,” Alex repeats softly, kissing her neck, “I think it’s time for you to talk to a professional about this.” She adds softly.Tobin nods, “I think you’re right,” she says, shuddering at the thought of what has been happening, “I feel like I’m going nuts.”“You’re not going nuts, babe,” Alex says, sliding over to lay on top of her, kissing her neck, “you just need some help right now,” Alex moves her hand to cup Tobin’s breast, and
that’s when Tobin feels it, the pain from her tender, swollen breast. She freezes for a moment, thinking about it. Alex continues kissing her, sucking on her neck, biting lightly at it, a hand trailing to wrap behind her head. Tobin’s blood runs cold. This isn’t Alex. What do I do, what do I do, she thinks frantically. She slowly moves to take Alex’s hand from her breast, playing with her fingers, trying not to let on that she knows. “Babe,” she says softly, “can we wait a few minutes?” she asks, “I’m still kind of freaked out from that dream.” Alex’s head moves from her neck, getting up on her elbows, one hand on Tobin’s bicep looking down at her lovingly as her other hand strokes her hair. Tobin glances down and sees a trail of blood on her chest and stomach. My chin, she thinks. She swallows, feeling the terror rise once again. “Just kiss me,” Alex smiles at her, “I’ll make you feel better.”“Babe, I’m really not in the mood, okay?” Tobin pleads, fearing she knows what’s coming next. “Kiss me.” Alex urges, leaning forward, her face morphing, the dark skin appearing, the hair turning curly and black. “Kiss me.” She demands, curling her fingers painfully around Tobin’s arm, her other hand pulling her hair back. “No!” Tobin yells as she kicks at her, trying to move. “Kiss me,” The dark haired woman demands as her face morphs yet again, the skin becoming loose, beginning to break open and fall from her face, exposing bone. Tobin turns her head as she screams, jerking her body, yanking her limbs, desperately struggling to break free of her hold. “Kiss me.” The thing above her orders in a whisper, leaning in closer to her face. Tobin can smell the rotting flesh, the stomach turning scent of death. Skeletal fingers firmly grip Tobin’s head, forcing her to look. The grinning skull only inches from her face.“Kiss me.” The bones demand, breathing the putrid smell of decay on her. The last things Tobin remembers is hearing horrible screaming and her eyes rolling around, seeing the ceiling and then blackness. January 25, 2018 Alex looks up from her notebook, her timeline coming together. She sees Syd, sprawled on the couch, Jamie next to her holding Karen in her lap. They’re all asleep. She glances at her watch, it’s almost three in the morning. She vaguely remembers Syd declaring she needed a power nap nearly an hour ago. She looks down at her notebook, gripping her pen tightly. The pen Tobin gave her. She fights against thinking where she could be, what she was doing. The darker thoughts of what was being done to her. She closes her eyes and sends up a prayer, asking God to spare her, not to let her suffer. She feels so responsible for the situation they’re in right now. She feels so stupid for not seeing it unfold. She feels so weak for allowing herself to be manipulated by this spirit. She smells the strong scent of coffee, opening her eyes to see a steaming mug next to her hand. She looks up. Mrs. Cahill is standing next to her, gently placing a hand on her shoulder. “Look in the crate on the counter. The strongbox. You’ll find what you’ll need.” She says quietly. “I’m so scared for her,” Alex whispers, “I have to help her.” Mrs. Cahill nods, “You’ll get her back.” She tilts her head towards the kitchen. “The strongbox.” Alex nods and get up from the floor, taking the coffee mug and walking with stiff muscles to the counter. She lifts out sheafs of paper, placing them on the counter, finding the strongbox and bringing it to the kitchen table. It has a lock on it, making Alex bite the inside of her mouth as she wonders how to open it. “I can get that, sweetie.” A gentle voice says behind her. Alex spins to see Mr. Cahill giving her a small smile, concern in his eyes as he brings a heavy pair of bolt cutters to the box. She watches as the lock nearly crumbles and he unlatches it for her. “Everything will turn out fine, dear,” he says, “you’ll all be okay.” “Thanks,” she says, lifting the lid. Her phone goes off, she sprints to the coffee table. “Hello?” she nearly shouts. “Alex, are you with Tobin?” a voice asks urgently, Alex looks at her phone. It’s Cindy, Tobin’s mother. “No,” she replies miserably, her voice wavering. “She’s in terrible danger,” Cindy says, “you must get to her.” “I know,” Alex says, moving back to the table, siting down, “I don’t know where she is right now.” “Tell me what happened.” Cindy instructs. So, Alex starts from the top, beginning with entering Tobin’s house, and going from there. She includes all the details she can remember, Cindy stopping her to ask questions, about the hum, the headache, Tobin’s reaction to the card from the flowers. “Are you alone?” Cindy asks when Alex is finished. “No, Syd, Jamie and Karen are here, they were helping me sort through the papers but are taking a nap right now.” “Wake them up, please, they need to hear this.” Cindy instructs. Alex rouses them from their nap. They gather around the table as Alex puts her on speaker phone. “She’s at house, most likely the attic,” Cindy begins, “now, before you enter, you must say this prayer. Someone write this down.” Cindy tells them what they must do to protect themselves, how they should address the sprit and banish her from the house. Thirty minutes later, she’s answered questions from the group and saying a prayer for them. “Call me when it’s over, please.” She asks Alex. “I will,” Alex says, “thank you so much.” “We’ll get Tobin,” Syd says, not sure who is on the phone, “it will be okay.” “I’m praying it will be.” Cindy says and disconnects the call. “Okay, I’ve got some of things we’ll need at my store. The incense, jar for it, the feathers.” Syd says, scribbling herself a note. "I'm gonna bring some real special stuff for that bitch," she mutters as she writes. “I got the salt we’ll need at our house, we can stop before we go in.” Jamie nods her head. “Who was that?” Karen asks, turning to look at Alex. “It was Tobin’s Mom.” She replies. “Like, she knew something was going on?” Syd asks, her eyes wide. “Mother’s intuition?” Alex shrugs. “That’s some spooky shit.” Jamie says, shuddering. “How does she know all this ghost busting stuff?” Karen asks. “I don’t know,” Alex shrugs, “but I do know that Tobin doesn’t know. So, she won’t hear it from us, got it?” “Got it?” Alex repeats loudly looking at them. “Sure, yeah, of course,” are the assorted replies. “Okay, I need an hour to go through this.” Alex gestures to the strongbox, “So, Syd, get your stuff.” “I’ll go with and get the salt ready and anything else we need,” Jamie offers. “Good idea,” Alex nods her head, “I don’t like the idea of you going to your store alone at…four forty-five in the morning.” “I’ll stay here and do whatever you need,” Karen offers. Alex nods. “We’ll see you soon,” Syd says as her and Jamie gather their coats and belongings. “We’ll meet you at their place.”“Okay,” Alex says, sitting down in front of the strongbox, “Karen, if you’ll just jot down in my notebook whatever I say, okay?” “You got it,” Karen says, sliding in the seat across from her. She reaches for the pen and notebook. Tobin’s eyes flutter open, her first thought is of how bad her throat hurts. It’s so dry, it’s on fire. She’s having trouble swallowing. She tries to raise her head, but it feels like it weighs a hundred pounds. Without moving her head, her eyes scan the room. She sees the high ceiling, lit from the moonlight filtering in the windows. She’s in the attic? She feels so woozy, she’s having trouble moving her limbs. She’s so tired. She's in pain, deep in her lower abdomen. She can feel the strong cramps in her pelvis. She looks down, seeing a flash of light colored clothing. She scrunches her eyes, moving her hand to feel the fabric. She’s wearing a white nightgown, it feels like silk. It comes to her mid-thigh, she rolls her head and looks at the thin straps and then the plunging neckline. What the fuck? She hears the hard clack of footsteps on the wood floor approaching her. She rolls her head towards the noise. The dark haired woman is approaching. Will this never end, she wonders. Please God, I beg you, give me strength. It’s your will for me, I live in Your Name, but please, help me. I don’t know what to do. She can feel the tears falling, rolling down her face. Her head throbs. Everything is sore. It hurts to think. She just wants to close her eyes and pray this is all a dream. A horrible nightmare. Through her nearly closed eyes she sees the woman standing before her. She’s wearing men’s pant and a button down. Panic rises as she watches her unbutton her shirt. “So, are you ready to give yourself to me?” she asks Tobin. Placing the shirt on the edge of the chaise lounge Tobin is sprawled on. “No,” Tobin croaks, her voice shot. “Lex.” The woman clucks her tongue, unbuttoning the top button on the trousers. “What a pity.” She says, kicking off her heels. "You are so stubborn. More than the rest of them." She sighs, “I want to make love to you,” she says, her voice resigned, “but I guess if I must, then I will just fuck you again.” “No,” Tobin moans, desperately trying to move. She’s so tired, her body isn’t responding to her commands. She feels lightheaded. Like she’s terribly dehydrated. The soft musical laugh fills the room, “You’ll get there,” she says, sliding the pants off, stepping out of them. Tobin’s eyes widen at the cock hanging between her legs. “Hhhmm,” The woman, contemplates, “I think I’ll take you from behind again, that was fun.” “No!” Tobin cries out, feeling her waist being pulled towards the end of the chair. She feels her body being flipped over, she’s on her stomach, hands above her head. She closes her eyes, praying for this unending nightmare to be over.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Alex quickly looks over each piece of paper in the box, eyes scanning over the writing. She holds up a document, yellowed with age. It’s a birth certificate. “Christen Annamarie Press, born 1898, New Orleans.” She reads aloud, Karen writing it down. She gasps. “What?” Karen looks up. “She was born with two sets of genitals.” Alex whispers. “Woah,” Karen writes it down, shaking her head. Alex sorts through more papers. “She worked in the freak shows,” she murmurs, “oh my God,” she says. “What?” Karen asks again, looking up expectantly. “Her parents sold her to the circus owner when she eight.” Alex says, not believing her eyes. “Fuck,” Karen says under her breath. “Boston, Tampa, Atlanta, New York, Washington.” Alex keeps sorting through papers, “She travelled the whole East Coast as an oddity.” “She bought her freedom in 1923 and moved to Portland.” Alex states. “To get a fresh start.” Karen adds as she writes. Alex digs around, finding a newspaper page. She scans it. “Elegant Evenings.” She says, her eyes darting across the page. “July first, 1927. That’s when she opened the brothel. This is the ad.” She sets the paper down, looking for more. She finds a leather book. Opening the stiff cover, she reads the first page. She looks up at Karen. “This is her journal, I’ll read it in the car. We’ve got to go!” All Tobin can see is the fading burgundy fabric of the chaise lounge chair she’s laying on. The weight of the dark haired woman is on her back, still breathing heavily. Pain is radiating through Tobin’s lower abdomen, the icy coldness making her shudder. Cramps rack her body. She’s freezing even though she’s covered in a layer of sweat. “Mom,” she moans, “Mom,” she cries. Please get me. Make it stop. Make it stop. She’s so tired. “All you have to do is say yes, love,” The French accent fills her ear, lips kissing just under it. “You’ll have pleasure for all eternity.” “No,” Tobin moans, weakly shaking her head. “Lex.” “So stubborn,” the woman laughs at her. “That’s it,” Alex says, looking up from the journal, “if Julia is the blond one walking around the baby, that has to be it.” “What?” Karen questions as they near Tobin’s house. “Nothing,” Alex says, shoving the journal in her backpack. “I think I figured it out.” Karen swings Alex’s car into her driveway, Syd and Jamie exiting the front door. “We have to go up and over,” Jamie states, pointing to a ladder placed on each side of the high fence. “Power must be out, gate won’t work.” Alex nods determinedly, “Let’s do this.” Karen unfolds a piece of paper from her pocket as they walk to the ladder. “Stop guys,” she says, unfolding it, “let’s say our prayer here, before we enter her property.” Alex nods, wondering briefly if Karen meant Tobin or Christen about who’s property it was. She’s tired, actually, beyond tired, but adrenaline is coursing through her system. She doesn’t know what to expect but feels better when Jamie puts a hand on her shoulder and gives her a reassuring squeeze. The back door opens easily. They silently enter. “Hum is gone,” Alex notes, it’s freezing cold in house. Karen blows air from her mouth, seeing her breath. “What the fuck?” Syd bends down, grabs a shirt on the floor, holding it open with both hands. There’s blood on it. “What the…” she trails off. “You guys look in Tobin’s room and the bathroom, we’ll look in the study.” Jamie suggests. “Fuck that,” Syd whispers urgently, “there’s no way in Hell I’m walking through here without the rest of you. They always kill the black people first.” Karen stifles a laugh, “That’s just in movies.” “They got the idea somewhere.” Syd defends herself. “We stay together. Power in numbers.” A persistent thumping can be heard from the floors above them. They all look up. “Actually, that’s a very good idea Syd.” Jamie amends. They find some blood on Tobin’s comforter, more in the hallway. “Holy shit, look!” Alex exclaims, her voice low as she points to the TV. One of Tobin’s crutches is balanced on top of the enclosure. “There!” Jamie points to the kitchen. Her other crutch is on top of the kitchen cabinets, far out of reach. “The fuck is that?” Karen questions, stepping further into the living room. She points to an object on the wood base holding the drapery rod above Tobin’s window. “Is that her phone?” “Fuck,” Syd mutters, shaking her head. “Miss Alex?” A voice calls from behind them. They all spin around in unison. It’s Ellie. She looks terrified. “What the fuck?” Both Syd and Karen mutter, this is the first time they have ever seen a ghost. “Miss Alex!” she cries as she approaches, taking Alex’s hand, “She’s hurting Miss Tobin!” she exclaims, pointing to the kitchen counter. “She made her take those.” Syd is the closest, grabbing the bottle of Ambien. “How many, Ellie?” Alex questions her, finding her voice. “One yesterday, one last night and one this morning.” Ellie answers. Syd has dumped the bottle out, counting the pills. She looks up. “Twenty-six.” “One from the night before.” Alex nods. “She wouldn’t OD from that,” Karen states. They nod.“They’re in the attic.” Ellie states. “Thank you, Ellie.” Alex says. As quietly as they can, they mount the stairs to the second floor. They wince each time a step creaks, freezing for a moment before proceeding cautiously. On the landing, they look around. “Should we check the rooms?” Alex asks, “Or follow the blood trail?” her voice quivers. Karen slides an arm around her shoulders, squeezing, “It’s not a lot of blood,” she comforts, “just drops.”Alex nods, fighting back tears. “Here,” Jamie says, handing each of them a piece of paper, “salt circle first. No speaking to any spirits. Salt circle. Then this prayer. Don’t engage until it’s finished. No matter what.” They nod. “Then I light the incense, right?” Syd questions. Jamie nods. The thumping is louder on this floor, meaning it’s coming from the attic. It increases in pace as the four women gather at the landing, looking up at the stairs. As Jamie takes her first step, the thumping stops. She looks back at the others, takes a deep breath, and proceeds. Alex grabs Syd’s hand as they climb the stairs. The attic runs the length of the house, but the stairs are situated so you enter in the middle on the driveway side wall. As they enter, the first thing Alex sees is Ellie, now standing against the wall, crying into her hands. The room is lit with the rays of the rising sun. She looks towards the turret door and sees Tobin, stretched out across the chaise lounge chair. Christen is standing beside the chair, tucking in a crisp button shirt to her pants. As they approach, Christen looks up and smirks at them, now slowly buttoning her pants with a satisified look on her face. The four stand about six feet away from the Christen and lounge chair. Each silently taking out their salt containers and creating a large circle around themselves. “So, what do we have here?” Christen questions cockily, smirking at them as they make their circle. The women begin their prayer. Their words seem to have a slight affect on Christen, even though she covers it by casually standing behind the lounge chair. “I thought I got rid of you,” Christen sneers at Alex. Alex feels her anger rising at her. “No way,” she says, her voice steely with determination. “Tricked me once, but never again.” Christen merely sniffs at her, turning to look at Jamie. “Trying to avenge your brother? Justin, that was his name, wasn’t it?” she asks, a smile playing at her lips. “Again?” her tone is as she’s bored. “Today is judgement day for you, Press.” Jamie spits at her angrily. Syd is on her knees, lighting the incense. They can still see their breath from the coldness of the room. Alex’s eyes are on Tobin. She’s lying on chair, her casted foot straight out, her left one dangling off. She’s curled into herself, hands clutching in between her legs, covered in a sheen of sweat, shuddering and shivering. Her eyes are clamped shut, hysterical whimpers coming from her mouth. She’s wearing a silk nightgown with thin white straps, one hanging off her shoulder. The ends of it ride high on her thighs. “Ha!” Christen responds, moving to sit behind Tobin, gathering her in her arms to hold her. Her eyes betray her with a sudden nervousness that gives way to a hardened, cold, calculating look. Alex can feel the rage building within her at Press. She’s amazed at her strength, pulling Tobin up and holding her as if she’s a play doll. Tobin weakly tries to resist, her arms moving clumsily, head lolling forward as if she doesn’t have the strength to hold herself up. “Let her go.” Jamie demands. “I don’t think so,” Christen smirks, moving her hand to grip Tobin’s hair, pulling her head back and then sucking on her neck. Tobin whimpers at the touch, trying to squirm away but it’s useless in Christen’s strong grip. Tobin’s eyes open halfway, slowly, Alex watching as she looks around the room. Their eyes meet, Tobin’s growing wider. “Lex,” she croaks out, her voice rough and cracking. “What do you want with her?” Alex questions loudly. She’s still looking at Tobin, her heart breaking at the terror she sees in Tobin’s eyes. Her face is pale, her lips tinged blue. Alex doesn’t know if it’s from the cold or the Ambien. She knows too much of the drug could affect one’s breathing. Christen smirks again, placing a hand tenderly on Tobin’s jaw, guiding her to her face and kissing her. “I like her,” she says, an impish grin on her face. “She’s not yours.” Alex states. Karen and Jamie begin to recite the Latin prayer Cindy told them to say. Christen flinches slightly, again, covering her nerves by smiling and rubbing Tobin’s arm. “She’s a good fuck,” Christen replies, her lips curling into a smile as she looks directly at Alex. “With your fingers or your cock?” Alex replies angrily, eyes blazing.Christen’s eyebrows raise, eyes going wide at the realization Alex knows her secret. She tries to cover it quickly by dropping a hand in between Tobin’s legs, circling her clit over the silky material. Tobin whines and tries to close her legs only for Christen to yank her head back. “Yeah,” she smirks, fingers still moving, “I like how tight she is around my cock.” “You bitch!” Alex exclaims, taking a step forward. Syd firmly grabs her shoulder, “Focus.” She orders her. “History.” Alex takes a deep breath and gathers her thoughts. Jamie and Karen’s voices are becoming louder, their tone more urgent in their prayer. Alex looks up at Christen. “Kinda like how Maxwell Oliver did?” she smirks back at her. Christen hides her surprise by roughly shoving Tobin from the chair, who collapses in a heap on the floor. Christen moves to stand behind her. Alex instinctively takes a step forward again only to feel Syd’s hand again. “You must stay in the circle.” She instructs. Alex nods. She looks at Tobin. She’s shivering, mouth hanging open as she pants, eyes open in slits, glazed and unfocused. “On your knees,” Christen orders, kicking Tobin’s side, pulling her up by her hair. “Put your arms out. Like before.” She leans over to speak in her ear, loud enough for all to hear. “If you put your arms down, I’ll do to Alex what I’ve done to you. Understand?” Tobin is shaking, her breath uneven, filled with shudders and gasps. Christen pulls her head back roughly. “Understand? Arms down and I’ll take Alex as well.” Tobin nods, eyes wide, filled with terror. “No! Please! Not Alex!” she cries, her low voice rough and nasal. Christen laughs as she places a book on each of Tobin’s flat out palms. Alex notices one book is the one she wrote and the other is Tobin’s Bible. Christen crosses her arms as she stands behind Tobin, trying to ignore Jamie and Karen but flinching occasionally at some of the phrases. She’s beginning to look nervous Alex thinks. Syd drops down on a knee to pick up the incense, holding it front her with one hand, the other hand holding a paper she’s reading aloud. Alex is focused on Tobin, who’s arms are beginning to shake under the weight and weird angle of the books. She’s looking right at Alex. Her tired eyes, struggling to stay open. “It’s time for you to go.” Karen commands sternly. Funny, Alex thinks briefly, eyes still on Tobin, she’s never heard that tone from Karen before. She sounds pretty badass. “You have crossed the boundaries and it’s time for you to leave.” Christen just laughs and shakes her head. “I’m not leaving my home.” Alex watches as Tobin’s eyes widen, her muscles straining, arms beginning to waver. “You relinquished ownership with your death. You know that.” Syd informs her. “New Orleans taught you that.” Alex adds. Christen glares at her. Silence now fills the room. “We want you out.” Jamie orders. She points to Tobin. “She wants you out.” “I don’t think so,” Christen laughs, extending her arms down, hands shaking Tobin’s arms so the books fall to the floor. “No!” Tobin screams, slumping forward, “Lex, I’m sorry,” she cries, chest heaving, sobs racking her body. Alex almost steps forward again but feels Syd hand before she moves. She nods. “She can’t tell anyone she wants me out if she’s gone insane.” Press states, again pulling on Tobin’s hair, holding her up and then pressing her hands on her temples. The four step backwards from the high pitch sound, watching in horror as Tobin clamps her hands to her ears, curling to the floor, screaming out. Alex sinks to her knees, leaning forward, careful not to cross over the line. They’re only a few feet apart. She’s crying, tears coming down her face. Syd’s on the ground next other, frantically pulling items from her backpack. Tossing a dead frog at Christen’s feet, making her recoil. “Bitch, you’re going to Hell now!” she yells angrily, tossing a handful of bones at her. Christen takes a step back, looking intently at the items that land at her feet, her face becoming more serious and angry. Syd begins a chant, Alex doesn’t know what language it’s in, she thinks it’s French. Christen moves back to stand tall. Karen squirts Holy Water at Christen, making her flinch away. Alex takes off her jacket, the room is becoming unbearably hot. Tobin’s screams are growing more hoarse and weaker. She’s shuddering on the floor. The noise is gone for them to hear, just Tobin now, Alex assumes. Christen looks at them angrily. “Maybe she needs something more physical,” she says, arching an eyebrow, just daring Alex to try to stop her. She leans over and touches Tobin’s stomach. Tobin’s wail fills the room, it’s a cry of agony, followed by shrieks of pain. She’s instantly balled into a fetal coil, knees to her chin, quaking in pain. Her cries pierce Alex’s soul.“Once I break her, she’ll be mine.” Christen nods triumphantly, it’s hard to hear her over the screams. She looks at Alex, raising an eyebrow in challenge. Think, think, think, Alex pleads to herself. There’s nothing she can say to help Tobin right now. Christen takes another step back from her when Syd pours a dark liquid in a small circle just beyond the salt line. “That’s enough!” a booming male voice yells behind the four. They all spin to look, eyes widening at what they see. Mayor George Baker is standing behind them and the rest of the room is filled with other spirits. “The fuck?” Syd whispers, looking at all the people. Alex recognizes many faces in the crowd, there has to be over forty people in the room. Most are from the Historical Society, a few are from her family. There are others she doesn’t recognize. All are eyes are angrily boring down on Christen who stands in a stunned silence. Alex hears the distinct thump of a cane and her mouth drops open when she sees Mrs. Cahill making her way forward through the crowd. She stands next to Karen, just outside the circle. “Your time here is over, dear,” She says sadly. “Says you, old woman?” Christen sneers at her, glancing down at Tobin, who’s screams have become hoarse, she’s nearly convulsing on the floor. “Yes,” Mrs. Cahill replies, flicking her cane at Tobin who instantly goes limp. She’s panting, soft moans coming out with each exhale. “Alex, dear,” Mrs. Cahill says, gesturing to Tobin, “bring her in to your circle now.” She instructs. Alex lunges forward on her knees, Syd taking a step to grab Tobin’s legs and carry her. Alex lifting Tobin from under her shoulders, kneeling back and then awkwardly sitting, holding Tobin’s torso in her in arms. Her head on her shoulder. “I’ve got you,” She chants, her mouth touching Tobin’s ear. Tobin’s shuddering, shivering, flinching at the touch. She can smell the sharp scents of sweat, sex and fear on her. Ellie moves forward and places a blanket on the floor just outside the circle. “Thank you, Ellie,” Alex says softly. Syd and Jamie lifting Tobin’s legs and wrapping her in it. Alex feels Tobin’s head move, she leans forward to see Tobin’s eyes wide. “Who’s that?” Tobin slurs, glancing up at Alex. “That’s Ellie.” Tobin whimpers, “Who’s that?” “That’s Mrs. Cahill, I live with her.” Alex explains, hoping this doesn’t put Tobin over the edge. Tobin begins shuddering in her arms, Alex realizing she’s looking at Christen. She squeezes her tighter, bringing her head next to hers, “I’ve got you, you’re safe now, I’ve got you.” She says it hoping to assure her, but Alex isn’t assured of anything right now. She’s terrified of what might happen. She’s a bit relieved to see Mrs. Cahill, but prays this isn’t some sort of trick that Christen is pulling on them all. Tobin cranes her neck to follow Christen’s gaze and sees the room full of spirits. She clumsily rolls her head back to look up at Alex. “Who are all these people?” There’s fear in her eyes, Alex can see the panic rising. “They’re good spirits that are here to help.” She whispers in her ear. Their attention is drawn to Syd who is blowing the incense at Christen. “You going to Hell, bitch,” she growls, her anger flaring. “Just a moment, dear,” Mrs. Cahill says easily, flashing her cane and ceasing the flow of the incense. Syd looks down at it, suddenly still. “Miss Press has some things to explain to us.” “Yeah, like why you killed my brother!” Jamie says harshly. Christen takes a step back, edging towards the turret door. Mrs. Cahill flicks her cane and the door shuts loudly, the slam echoing in the large room. She takes a step closer to Christen who looks scared for the first time. “You will listen to me.” Mrs. Cahill says patiently. “On. Your, Knees.” She commands sternly. Christen falls to her knees, her eyes wide, shocked that they’re moving against her will. Her hands are balled into tight fists, she’s looking at Mrs. Cahill defiantly, making Alex think of her photo from her arrest. “Alex,” Mrs. Cahill calls out gently, turning to her, “I believe you have some questions for Miss Press?” She makes her way to the lounge chair and seats herself on it. Alex’s throat goes dry, her mind a mix of fleeting thoughts. She changes her grip on Tobin who whimpers slightly, her breath still uneven and shuddering against her neck. She strokes Tobin’s sweaty, stringy hair away from her face as she twitches in her arms. She looks down at her and then slowly up at Christen. “I think I know why you did what you did. Those men you killed,” she says softly, looking intently at Christen who’s eyes are blazing back at her, “and Ellie.”A gasp goes up from the Syd, Karen and Jamie as well as the others assembled. Eyes turn to Ellie, who is leaning against the wall, hands clasped in front of her, head down. “What could you,” Christen sneers, “possibly know?” she says defiantly. Alex looks at her thoughtfully, the anger she’s felt towards her is slowly evaporating and is being replaced with pity. “I know when you were born, you had both sets of genitals, which was quite rare in your day.” She begins, hearing the gasps behind her, “I know in your era it was viewed as shameful towards your parents who ended up selling you to the circus when you were just a child.” “You bitch!” Christen shrieks, losing her composure, “You read my journal!” Alex nods, “I did.” She admits. “I know the facts of your life.” “You don’t know anything!” Christen wails loudly, her ass falling back on her legs, tears springing from her eyes. “You know nothing!” “But I do,” Alex says quietly, gently. “I know at age twenty you bought your freedom from the carnival life, travelling with them for over twelve years. You moved here to Portland.” Tobin shifts in her arms, moaning out, her hands moving under the blanket to her belly, Alex looks at her and sees she’s wincing in pain. Alex takes a deep breath. “It made perfect sense for you to open a high brothel here. Especially a discreet one that would feature females and males.” Christen glares at her. “I’m not sure how the blackmail started, but you paid Mr. Walker for nearly six months before he was killed. He came from the East Coast so I assume he knew your secret and he milked you for everything he could. Maxwell Oliver was a different story. You wrote tenderly of him. A confused young boy, learning about himself. What happened?” Christen turns pale, looking down, her shoulders slumped, defeat emanating from her being. “They threatened to expose me, ruin me.” She says. “Sure, Mr. walker would threaten that,” Alex says, “but what about Maxy? It appears you two had a close history together.” Christen sighs. “He came to see the girls once a week for over ten months. We got to talking and I could sense he was searching something…more.” She looks up at Alex for the first time, her face resigned, she seems tired for the first time. “He was confused about himself, not satisfied with women. We spoke and made an arrangement. He wasn’t yet ready to be with a man, and technically I fell under that category so I could give him want he wanted without it being too…shocking to him.” “I had a stable of young, feminine looking men for that purpose, but he only wanted me. I trusted him.” Christen continues. “He kept coming around, but became nervous, afraid someone would expose him. Being discreet was our priority, I assured him nobody would know.” She says, shaking her head. “He became enraged, he turned on me, threatening those that I loved, threatening to expose me. He was ashamed of his desires, his confusion turned to anger.” Alex thinks, the pages of the journal flashing in her mind’s eye, as her story unfolds, the room silent, mesmerized by the tale. “He threatened Julia, didn’t he?” Alex asks, “While she was pregnant with your child?” Christen lets out a heart breaking sob, bringing her hands to face, crying out. Alex motions to Ellie, leaning forward to whisper in her ear. Ellie nods and leaves the room. Alex glances at Syd, Karen and Jamie, they’ve all sat down on the floor, looking with a mix of emotions at Christen. “That’s when Mr. Walker appeared as well, right?” Alex asks. Christen nods, removing her hands from her face, wiping her eyes. “Maxy was here when the baby came, he was downstairs drinking after hurting Julia. Mr. Walker stormed in just after. The baby was born dead, Julia bled horribly and passed a short time later. The mid-wife and the doctor had just left. There was nothing they could do. I was just about to ring the undertaker.” Tobin flinches and whimpers, her casted leg scraping across the floor. Alex shifts her in her arms, holding her tight, whispering words of comfort in her ear. She quiets down. Alex looks back at Christen and sees she’s watching Tobin, a look of regret in her eyes. She looks back at Alex quickly. Ellie reappears, placing five water bottles just outside the salt circle and giving a nod to Alex. “Thank you, Ellie,” she says softly, giving her a small smile. She takes her position back against the wall. Syd grabs the bottles, passing two to Jamie and opening two more to place next to Alex. Alex takes a long drink, not realizing how thirsty she was. She nudges the bottle to Tobin’s lips, but she’s not responsive. “Mr. Walker came in the room in a drunken rage. I was having none of it. My life had ended when Julia took her last breath, which was only minutes before. I shot him, I shot him because he was wrong for what he did and I shot him because my life was over.” She turns her head to look at Ellie. “I didn’t mean for the gun to go off at you, Ellie,” she says softly, “I’m so terribly sorry,” her voice full of remorse. “Yes, Miss,” Ellie nods. “Maxy came into the room, wanting to know what happened. He laughed at me, called me a fool, we fought and I shot him as well.” Christen says. She looks up at Alex, then scans the room, “I am not proud of what I did. I acted in a rage. Those men were horrible, but they didn’t deserve to die by my hand.” She pauses, fresh tears appearing in her eyes, “And sweet, loving Ellie, I’m so sorry. It was an accident.” She cries silently, head down. “Christen, dear, come sit.” Mrs. Cahill instructs, gesturing for her rise and join her on the lounge chair. Christen nervously sits next to her. “I wish we had more time for a cup of tea, but we need to get moving along,” Mrs. Cahill says, patting Christen’s leg. “You’ve created much destruction and you must atone for your sins.” She continues. “What you have done to Justin and Tobin is completely unacceptable and you know we can not let that pass.” Christen nods, “Yes,” she says miserably, “do what you must.” She’s feeling these wounds that are as fresh as the day they happened. There’s a sudden shift in the room, the atmosphere changes, the heat of the room cools off, leaving it comfortable. A vibrant energy flows as a beautiful blond enters and stands next to where Karen and Jamie sit, just on the other side of the salt line. She has lovely long hair, beautiful blue eyes and radiant smile as she views Christen. She’s holding an infant in her arms. “Chrissy, darling,” Julia greets, smiling as Christen slowly raises her head. Christen’s features morph from utter defeat to cautious, restrained hope. “Julia?” Her voice catches in her throat. “She’s been here this whole time, looking for you.” Mrs. Cahill explains, “You were a different plane, one of anger and revenge.” She pats her leg again, Christen looking at her. “But now you have a chance for redemption.” Christen looks at Mrs. Cahill carefully, assessing her truthfulness. “What happened with my brother?” Jamie asks boldly, causing Alex and Syd to flinch. Christen sighs, “He had an amazing aura,” she says, looking down at Tobin lying in Alex’s arms, “I was so attracted to him because of his energy, his positive energy. I wanted his love, when he resisted, I thought,” she looks up at Jamie, “I thought if I broke him, and her,” she looks at Tobin, frowning deeply, “I thought if broke them, I could build them up and they’d love me back.” She looks up at Julia, “They both reminded me so much of you,” then she looks at Jamie, “I’m so sorry.” Jamie nods as Christen looks over at Tobin, biting her lower lip, wiping a tear away, “Alex, I’m sorry,” Alex nods but she doesn’t look up, instead focusing on Tobin who is beginning to stir. Tobin awakes with a jolt, flinching as she sees Christen looking down at her. She cries out, arms jerking, as Alex squeezes her tightly, “You’re okay, she can’t hurt you anymore,” Alex speaks in her ear, “She can’t hurt you, okay? You’re safe. You’re safe.” Tobin’s breathing is rapid and shallow, “Lex,” Tobin breathes, “Lex,” her eyes closing again. “I’m here, I’m here, baby,” Alex says, beginning to cry, rocking slowly, overcome by the emotions of the last twenty-four hours. She feels Syd’s hand on her back, moving to her shoulder to hold her against her. “Christen,” Mrs. Cahill says, “now that the truth has been told, your next step is to atone.” “You should do it,” Syd says softly in her ear, “you should tell her story. Write it.” Alex jerks her head to look at her, tears in her eyes, shaking her head, “Fuck no, Syd,” There’s no way she would work with Christen after what she’s done to Tobin. Jamie ducks her head forward to look at Alex, nodding earnestly at her, “You should, it needs to be heard.” Alex shakes her head again, looking down at Tobin and then glancing around the room, “I don’t think so,” Christen looks at her, “You don’t have to,” she says softly, looking at Tobin with sadness in her eyes, “she hates me, I did horrible things to her, and I don’t want to come in between you again.” “Alex,” Mrs. Cahill says, Alex looks up at her, “dear, don’t doubt the level of compassion Tobin carries with her,” she states, “remember, you were fortunate enough to receive it, given time, perhaps Christen will too.” She gives her a gentle smile, her eyes warm and loving. “You’re right,” Mrs. Cahill’s words resonate with her. Alex nods her head, she can feel Tobin’s body is limp, she’s out again, “I shouldn’t speak for Tobin,” she looks up at Christen, “I promise you, her and I talk will about it, okay?” She asks, “I need to know how she’ll feel about us working together.” Christen nods, “It’s more than I deserve,” she says, “whatever you need to do.” Mrs. Cahill stands, “Okay everyone,” she gestures to the spirits standing behind the four women in the salt circle, “thank you for coming, thank you for your energy, I’ll see you soon.”Alex watches the spirits file out of the room, some waving a hand or giving her a smile. She turns to see Tobin looking up at her, her eyes glassy and tired, “Water?” she croaks, trying to shift from Alex. She sticks a shaky hand out from under the blanket, trying to sit up more to take a drink. Her hand shakes violently, water spilling onto her, Alex gently holds her hand, removing the bottle with her other, leaning her chest against Tobin’s back, pressing forward and bringing the bottle to her lips. Tobin drinks greedily, water spilling over the rim of the bottle, flowing down her chin, disappearing under the silky nightgown she’s in. She leans her head back, exhausted from the effort, “Thanks,” she mumbles, closing her eyes, moaning softly. Mrs. Cahill pats Christen’s leg again, “Come on, dear, it’s time,” she says, standing up and turning to Alex. “Alex,” she says, “Tobin is going to be violently ill for the next day or so, so lots of rest, lots of fluids. She’s probably exhausted, just keep her comfortable and she’ll bounce back.” “Will she remember all of this?” Alex asks, looking from Mrs. Cahill to Christen. Both frown. “Hard to say, she might.” Alex’s shoulders slump at the thought of it. “She’ll be alright,” Mrs. Cahill says gently, “just watch her closely, be patient, she’s likely to be very confused for the next day.” “She’s being to be sick?” Alex asks, holding her tight. Mrs. Cahill nods, “She’ll be releasing all of the negative energy she was subjected to, don’t be scared. This is normal.” “Okay,” Alex says, looking at Tobin. Burying her head in her neck. “I’ll see you at home in a while,” says smiles at her, “everything will be okay.” She turns to Christen who is now standing, holding Julia’s hand. “It’s time, dear,” she says quietly. Julia gives her a radiant smile as they take a step towards the turret door, Christen stops. “Alex, I’m very sorry,” she says sincerely, her pleading with her, “I, I, just” she shakes her head, tears flowing. She looks at Julia, “I’m so sorry,” she’s crying harder. “Christen, dear,” Mrs. Cahills says softly, “Julia is coming with us.” She gestures for them to walk through the door. She turns to Alex and three others. They’re all looking at her expectantly. “Ladies, please bless and salt this door and keep the line of salt along this door until I tell Alex otherwise.” Jamie nods from within Karen’s arms. “You got it,” she says, leaning forward to reach for her salt container. They see the power comes back on, feeling a soft blow of warm air on them from the heat registers. “So cold,” Tobin chatters as she shakes under the blanket. Alex wraps her hand over Tobin’s sternum, rubbing it. “We’ll get you warmed up, babe.” Tobin leans back, looking up at her, “It’s you, right?” she asks softly, her eyes unfocused. “It’s me, Click.” Alex says, kissing her temple, “Just rest,” she says, swaying her in her arms a little. “What are they doing?” Tobin asks, her words slurry. “Blessing the door so no bad spirits come here.” Alex shares, leaning her head against Tobin’s. “You’re safe now,” Tobin grunts a response, her eyes closing, Alex can see she’s fighting against it and losing. She feels Tobin’s body tensing and relaxing, tensing and relaxing against her. “Just rest,” Alex urges, whispering in he ear, “I’ve got you, you’re safe.” Tobin lets out a high pitched sigh, her muscles relaxing against Alex. “Yeah,” she croaks. “Let’s get you to bed,” Alex says, shifting under her. “NO!” Tobin suddenly exclaims, arms moving under the blanket, “No bed!” she cries, hysterically, “No bed!” she struggles as Alex holds her, shushing her. “Please! No bed!” she pleads. “No bed, okay? No bed,” Alex whisper shouts, “No bed, it’s okay,” she looks up and sees Karen, Syd and Jamie looking at them, concern etched across their faces. “We’ll go to the couch, okay?” she answers, praying for Tobin to calm down. “No bed,” she cries, chest shuddering. “No bed,” Alex confirms, looking up at Syd, who winces and lets out a loud exhale through her mouth. Karen suggest they each take a corner of the blanket to carry Tobin down the stairs. At the first floor landing in the hallway, Ellie meets them. She’s eying Tobin but then looks up at Alex. “Miss Alex, I’ve prepared the couch for Miss Tobin,” she informs her, her head bowed. “Who are you?” Tobin’s slurry cracked voice asks. She’s squinting at Ellie. “I’m Ellie, Miss,” she says respectfully with a short curtsy. Tobin cranes her neck, looking at Alex, “Am I dead?” she asks fearfully, squinting at her. “No, you aren’t.” Alex shakes her head. “Am I dreaming?” Tobin asks, her voice cracking with the strain.“No, it’s over.” Alex replies.The four women watch as Tobin’s eyes roll around, “Fuck,” she mumbles as she passes out. Ellie has the couch set up with a sheet, a blanket draped over the back cushion, Alex can see a plastic tarp sticking out from under the sheet. A rug was placed near the cushion closest to Alex. A plastic bucket was on the floor near the ottoman. They gently lay Tobin down, Alex sliding to sit on the edge of the cushion, tenderly covering her. She leans forward, brushing the stringy, greasy hair way from Tobin’s face. She’s fighting tears as she looks at her. She softly runs two fingers along Tobin’s face, pausing to look at her chin, the bloody cut closed with dried blood encrusted around it. She runs her finger down her throat, seeing the bruises and hickeys left from her time with Christen, her chest, breast swollen and red with a deep bruising bite mark, nipple swollen and red. Syd appears next to her, holding some towels. “Come on, baby girl,” she says quietly, “let’s get her cleaned up, okay?” she offers. The two work silently to clean her, Alex letting out soft sobs, her eyes watering as she thinks of the fear and suffering Tobin endured. Syd comforts her as best she can. Tobin flinches occasionally, both women murmuring comforting words. Alex strokes Tobin’s forehead, leading her fingers into her hair. Ellie appears next to Alex again. “I’ve brought her some warm clothes, Miss,” she says quietly. “Thank you, Ellie,” Alex says, genuinely, “you’ve been such a help.”“You’re welcome, Miss,” Ellie says and disappears.“Okay,” Syd says, “that shit is freaky. I can see ghosts now?” she questions as she works the pair of sweatpants on Tobin’s legs. They get the thick sweatshirt on her. “I have so many questions,” Karen admits, “I didn’t understand half of what was happening up there. Who were all those people?” “And where did that lady take them?” Jamie asks. “I know, was that some sort of ghost tribunal or something?” Syd asks. She moves from the couch and sits at the kitchen table next to Jamie. Alex just sits and looks at Tobin, oblivious to the conversation around her. The chime for the driveway gate opening sounds, causing all of their heads to turn to look out the windows. Jamie gets up and opens them, peering out to see a grey sedan. A tall blond haired women leaves the car, running to the front door. “Tobin Powell Heath!” a voice yells, as she pounds on the door, “You better let me in!” “That’s Allie!” Alex exclaims as Syd opens the door. Allie comes striding in, a loud “Where is she?” as she passes a stunned Syd. She stops when she sees Tobin on the couch. She drops her purse, rushing to Alex’s side. “What happened?” Alex shakes her head, fresh tears coming down as she looks at her. Jamie places a hand on Allie’s shoulder. “She’ll be alright, she’s just been through a lot.” Allie nods, looking closely at Alex. She brings her arm around her shoulders to hug her. Alex lets out sob, turning her face into Allie’s shoulder. Allie moves her other hand to hold her.“Is the ghost gone?” she looks up and asks Jamie. Jamie nods. “Yeah,” she says, her voice low. The four women turn and look to the other side of Alex. “Thanks, Ellie,” Alex nods. “Uh,” Allie says, looking around, “what’s going on?” she asks quietly, searching the room. “That was Ellie, she was telling us Tobin is going to sick soon,” Karen says, looking at Allie. “And she’s a…ghost?” she asks, tilting her head. “Yep.” Syd answers, “She’s cool, though.”“Okay,” Allie shakes her head. What is going here, she wonders. Alex’s phone rings, she clumsily pulls it from her pocket. It’s Cindy. Alex puts the phone of speaker and begins to tell the story of what had transpired the last few hours. Over the next hour, the women talk, Alex moving from the ottoman to the floor, finding one of Tobin’s hands and holding it under the blanket. Cindy doesn’t seem surprised when they tell her about Tobin becoming ill as an after effect of this. She suggests cool towels for the fever that will come and to give her lots of fluids. Cindy praises them for a job well done, telling Alex she will see her soon and the call is over. “I can take it from here, guys,” Alex says, looking over to Jamie and Karen. “Go home and get some rest.” “You sure?” Karen asks looking at her carefully as Jamie yawns. Alex nods, “Ellie’s here, so’s Allie.” “Let’s meet up to talk about this some more, okay?” Jamie asks tiredly. “I have so many questions, especially about Tobin’s Mom?” Allie cocks her head at her, nodding in agreement. She’s known the woman for years and had no clue about her knowledge about what they had just spoke about. She spoke with such authority, patiently answering questions from all of them. “I’ll text you guys when Tobin’s feeling better.” Alex says, “Syd, go on, take off.” “Are you sure?” she asks reluctantly, not wanting to leave Alex just yet.“Yeah,” Allie answers, “I’m here, I’ll do whatever.” The women take their time leaving, slowly gathering their belongings. Alex stands, hugging each of them. “You did good today,” Syd says, hugging her tightly. “She’ll be fine.” Alex nods. “We’re right next door,” Karen says, “just text us if you need anything.” As the door shuts, Alex turns to look at Allie. “What do we do now?” Allie asks. Alex sighs, “We wait.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Allie has the sense to wait for Alex to offer to speak instead of questioning her, even though a hundred thoughts are running through her mind. Alex sits next to her on the ottoman, both facing a restless Tobin. “Is she drugged up?” Allie finally asks, pained to see her best friend like this. Alex shakes her head, “She’s probably been kept up for nearly thirty-six hours while on Ambien” She says quietly. She hears a sharp intake of breath of turns to see Allie grimacing. “What brings you here?” she asks her. Allie sighs, “I, I couldn’t get a hold of her yesterday,” she says, “and then this morning, I just felt something,” she shifts, rubbing a hand on her knee, “like, I got this stabbing pain in my stomach and I felt she was in terrible pain or something.” She turns her body to face Alex, “It was like, this, awful sense that something was wrong.” Alex nods, remembering Cindy’s call to her during the night. “So, I told Bati I had to go, got in the car and drove here.” Allie finishes. “It was worse than we thought.” Alex sighs, running a hand through her hair. “It didn’t help that I fucked it all up.” Allie grabs her forearm, “What do you mean?” her concern evident. “Well, I” Alex suddenly turns her head to the side, listening. She looks at Allie, “We got to get her to the bathroom.” She stands, taking a step to the couch and lifting Tobin from under her arms. Allie gets the hint and takes her legs, walking backwards to the bedroom and into the bathroom. Allie notices buckets placed on the floor of the bathroom, a wash cloth and a couple of towels on the counter. A filled water cup with a straw. “What is going on?” she whispers, looking intently at Alex who is maneuvering Tobin onto the toilet, pulling her sweatpants down. “Get her pants down,” Alex orders, trying to keep Tobin upright. Allie does so, and they get her situated on the toilet. “She’s gonna be sick.” Alex states. As she completes the statement, they both hear a choking noise coming from Tobin as she begins to gag. Alex is behind her, straddling the base of the toilet, holding her across the chest, she leans her forward. “Bucket!” she says urgently. Allie spins and grabs the bucket, holding it in front of Tobin as she begins to violently vomit. This goes on for almost two hours, the room filled with the mixed scents of vomit and fecal matter. At some point, Alex and Allie switch positions with Allie holding Tobin and Alex holding the bucket and flushing the toilet. Allie quietly questioning Alex about the events and learning all that went on. “Should she be at a hospital?” Allie asks, her eyes wide with fear. “I mean, I’ve never seen someone so out of it and so sick.” She’s got Tobin against her chest, holding her forehead to keep her head upright. Tobin begins stirring a little. “Wa, wa, water,” she stutters, her eyes slowly opening to see Alex looking at her. Alex holds the cup in front of her, fingering the straw to find her mouth. Tobin sucks at it, drinking over half of it and then leaning her head back on Allie’s chest. She hasn’t been sick in over thirty minutes. She rolls her eyes, looking up, “Harry?” she croaks. “I’m here, Har,” Allie says tenderly, stroking her hair. Allie sees Alex turn her head and nod and then look back at them. “Feel…terrible,” Tobin utters, wincing as she shifts slightly. Alex offers her more water. Tobin slowly sucking on the straw. “Thanks,” she says, her voice strained, rough and low. “How about we get you in the shower,” Alex suggests, “that might make you feel better, okay?” Alex suggests. Tobin nods. They get her on her shower chair, Alex stripping down to her bra and underwear, getting right in there with her, gently cleaning her, Allie at the ready with towels. Allie brings in a kitchen chair and they dress Tobin in a t-shirt and shorts, per Alex’s instructions, then blow dry her hair. “You’re gonna get a fever soon,” Alex informs her, “can you take this?” she holds out two pills. “It’s Tylenol, it will help.” Tobin simply drops opens her mouth. Alex brings the water cup to her lips. They get her settled on the couch, Allie manages to get her to drink some Gatorade. As soon as Tobin closes her eyes, Allie turns to Alex. “I need to leave at ten tonight to get back,” she informs Alex. “You need to sleep, you look awful.” She tosses an extra pillow at her. “I’ll take care of Tobin, okay?” she says, “You get some rest. Have you eaten at all today?” Alex shakes her head, “No,” she answers. Allie nods and pulls out her phone. The delivery guy arrives a short time later, handing the large bag to Allie. Alex stirs from the comfortable side chair, her feet up on the small ottoman. She raises her eyebrows when she sees she’s covered in a blanket. Ellie appears by her side. “Miss Tobin’s fever is just a little higher, but she’s still sleeping.” She informs her. “Thanks, Ellie,” Alex says, making Allie turn and look at her from the kitchen table where she’s removing items from the bag. Alex takes a deep breath, “Allie,” she calls out softly, keeping her voice quiet so as not to awake Tobin. She shifts in her chair, moving the blanket off before standing and moving next to her. “So, Ellie is a spirit that is here, there’s another one, a former gangster, and one last one, a nice man who just reads in the study. Ellie is here to help, so just ask her, okay?” Allie nods slowly, not looking at Alex as she works. “You know for a fact they’re okay to be here?” she asks suddenly. “They won’t hurt Tobin?” “Yeah,” Alex answers, “they’re fine.” Allie lets out a breath, “Okay,” she glances at Alex. “It’s a little weird to get used to.” Alex gives her a smile, “Oh, I know that.” Allie lets out a soft laugh, “Yeah, I imagine you do.” She nudges a container towards her. “Soup.” “Thanks,” Alex says, grabbing it and taking off the lid. She sits down at the table.Allie walks to the couch, looking at Tobin to make sure she’s okay before coming back to the table and sitting down as well. She looks at Alex. “Uh, Ellie?” Allie says slowly, carefully, “If you could keep an eye on Tobin while we eat, I’d sure appreciate it, okay?” she glances at Alex who smiles and nods. “She says of course,” Alex informs her. Allie nods and begins to eat. “Okay, before you lay back down, I need your help.” Allie says as they both move into the living room. “Yeah, sure,” Alex says, wondering what she’s talking about. “I’ve been thinking about this while we ate,” Allie says, she’s a little excited. “can you ask Ellie if she’ll help me out?” Alex nods. “Okay, can she knock once to answer no, twice for yes and three times to get my attention?” Allie asks. Alex smiles, “That’s brilliant.” She says, “Ellie, can you do that?” Two knocks ring out. Allie smiles, happy with herself. Four hours later, Allie looks over, seeing Alex still passed out in the chair, Tobin fidgeting under the blanket. She whimpers, her eyes moving rapidly under her lids. They flutter open. “Hey, Harry,” Allie says, she’s on the floor, kneeling next to her, “how are you feeling?” “Hot,” Tobin croaks, moving the blanket off her chest. “You have a fever,” Allie informs her, helping pull the blanket off. “Ellie, can you get some washcloths? Wet them and wring them out with cool water?” Two knocks are heard. Tobin looks at her with a startled expression. “It’s fine,” Allie reassures her. Tobin tries to sit, struggling to get up. Allie helps her and puts a bottle of Gatorade in front of her. “Am I still dreaming?” Tobin asks, sucking on the straw from the bottle. “No, it’s all over,” Allie assures her. Three knocks are heard. Allie sees the washcloths on the ottoman. “Here,” she says, placing a cool washcloth on Tobin’s forehead, then she puts them on each side of her neck. Tobin moans, closing her eyes, laying her head back on the cushion. “How do you feel?” Allie asks cautiously. “Awful,” Tobin replies, “so sore,” she coughs weakly, “so tired.”“Want to try and eat some soup?” she asks, “Are you hungry?” Eyes still closed, she nods, “Kinda,” she mumbles. Allie gets up and brings the cup of warm soup to her. She sits on the couch, spoon ready. “Okay, open up,” she says, holding the spoon in front of her. Tobin eyes open in little slits, eying her. She clamps her mouth shut. “Come on, Har, take some,” Allie says softly, confused by her. Tobin shakes her head slightly. “Har, you’re dehydrated, you need to get some fluids in you.” Allie explains patiently, thinking Tobin was just a little out of it. Tobin just side eyes her. Studying her with bleary eyes. Alex yawns from the chair, diverting their attention. Tobin looks over, suddenly scared. She begins to panic a little, her breathing becoming rapid, eyes growing larger as she looks at Alex.“Tobin, it’s fine,” Allie reassures her, not understanding why Tobin is getting upset. Tobin tries to move, her limbs clumsy, she lets out a whimper starting to look really scared. Alex is watching, waking up fast to this. “What’s wrong?” she asks, her voice still tinged with sleep. “She’s getting all upset, I don’t’ know why.” Allie responds, upset. Tobin glances back and forth between them, she doesn’t know if she’s dreaming or awake. “Tell, tell, me a secret,” she says to Allie, her voice gravelly and rough, “something we haven’t said anything about ever in this house.” “What?” Allie asks, confused. “Tell. Me. A. Secret.” Tobin says firmly, her narrowing on Allie, her breathing rapid and shallow. Allie raises a hand, looking around as she thinks, “Uh, in college you woke up to me and Bati having sex in your room?” “Another.” Tobin demands, her voice shaky, tears coming to her eyes. She nervously watches as Alex slowly stands up and moves towards them. “Um, you cried at the end of watching Finding Nemo and we teased you forever about it.” Allie states, “We snuck out one night in Frisco and almost got caught coming back drunk. I helped you prank Kelley and she’s never found out it was us. You told me how you thought you playing soccer put a strain on your parents’ marriage.” Allie rattles off, “Uh, you called me from France when you were so homesick and I made you laugh and called you a baguette. I made you feel my boobs when I was sure I found a lump.”Tobin relaxes back, eyes closed. Relief evident on her face.“You’re not dreaming, Click.” Alex says softly, kneeling before her, “It’s over, okay? She’s gone, it’s over.” Tobin begins to silently cry, Allie putting the soup down and Alex squeezing in on the couch next to her. They each take one of Tobin’s hands, Alex putting her other around
Tobin’s shoulders, putting her head against Tobin’s. “Text me when you get home.” Alex instructs, holding Allie tight. “I will,” she says, looking over at Tobin sleeping on the couch. “You guys gonna be okay?” Alex nods, “Yeah, we’ll have some things to work out, but I think so.” Allie squeezes her tight, “I think so, too.” Then she’s gone. January 26, 2018 “Open, please,” Alex commands, holding the thermometer in front of Tobin’s mouth. Tobin opens her mouth and lets Alex gently place the tip under her tongue and shuts it.
It’s six in the morning, both of them having a rough night. Both were overtired and restless. Nervous with each other. They haven’t seriously talked, neither was up for it. Both are exhausted. Tobin shifts uncomfortably, wincing as she moves her hips. This couch is comfy for naps but she feels like she’s been laying on it forever. Alex takes the thermometer out, studies it. Tobin looks at her. She looks just as exhausted as I feel, she thinks. “You’re down to ninety-nine degrees,” she announces, looking in her eyes. It still freaks her out to see the whites of Tobin’s eyes red, filled with blood from the force of her vomiting. Syd assured her it wasn’t anything serious, when she called, but Alex wants Tobin to get it checked when she goes to her doctor appointment on Monday. “Awesome,” Tobin gives her a shy smile. “Can I sit for a bit?” she asks nervously. “Sure,” Alex’s smile falters seeing how nervous Tobin is. She extends her hand to help her up. Tobin pats the cushion next to her. “Sit?” Alex nods and sits next to her. They’re silent for a minute. Both suddenly nervous. “It’s really over?” Tobin asks quietly, looking at her. “Yeah, it is.” Alex replies just as quietly. “You’re really here? You’re not a dream?” Alex sighs as she nods, “I’m here, I’m real. Tobin, I don’t know what I can tell you to make you believe me.” Tobin nods. “I trust you.” She says slowly, “But it was you and then her so many times…” she trails off. Alex shudders at the thought of what Tobin experienced. She’s deep in her thoughts when she feels a sharp pinch on her thigh. “Ow!” she exclaims, rubbing her leg. Tobin smirks at her, “Just checking.” “You ass,” Alex smirks back. “Listen,” Tobin starts, then clears her throat. “Uh, I’m still super confused about what happened,” she says, looking down at her lap, picking at the blanket covering her. “But I want to know.” She says softly. “Okay,” Alex nods, “whenever you want, I’ll tell you.” Tobin looks at her, nods and gives her another small smile. “Good.” She sighs. Another pause. Tobin nudges Alex’s knee with hers. “Do you wanna get out of here?” Alex tilts her head to look at her. “Do you want me to leave?” she asks slowly, quietly. Maybe things between them are worse they she thought, maybe Tobin hates me, she thinks. Tobin’s eyes widen, “No,” she says quickly. “I mean, if you do, I’ll be fine.” Alex just looks at her, trying to figure this out. “Like, do you want to get a hotel room or something?” Tobin asks, “With me?” Her eyes give away how nervous she is asking Alex this. “A hotel room?” Alex asks, arching an eyebrow. “Yeah.” Tobin nods. “My back is killing me and there’s no way I’m sleeping on that bed,” she jerks her head towards her bedroom. Alex lets out breath, “Oh!” she says, nodding. “You want to just come to my house?” She asks, “I mean, if you’re comfortable with that.” She adds quickly. Tobin brings a hand to her head, scratching at her hairline. She takes off her glasses and rubs her eyes. She nods at Alex. “This is more awkward than the first time I met you.” She gives her a shy smile. Alex smiles back. Tobin presses her knee against Alex’s leg.“Tobin?” Alex nudges her, looking at her. “Hmm?”
“Can I,” she starts, she shifts her position to face her, “can I…hug you?” Her voice tremors with emotion. Tobin moves her arm and twists her torso, bringing her head to Alex’s shoulder. Both begin to cry at the same time, holding each other tightly. “I didn’t know a spirit could be doing that to you, I’m so sorry!” Alex cries, shuddering against Tobin. Tobin pulls her even closer to her, hugging her tightly. They slowly calm each other down without even knowing it. They pull back a little, holding hands. “I thought I was going crazy,” Tobin admits, “Like, I was starting to really think maybe I was losing my mind.” She wipes her eyes. Alex shakes her head, “I should have spoken to someone, asked if this could really be happening.” Tobin squeezes her hand, “You told me you weren’t a Ghostbuster. You couldn’t have known.” “Yeah,” Alex nods. “Hey,” Tobin raises a shaky hand to Alex’s face, caressing her jaw, “You got me out of this. You and your amazing talents.” “It should have never gotten this far.” Alex says sadly, “I’m so sorry.” Tobin leans her head back on the couch cushion, looking at her with tired eyes. It makes Alex think of the day she came here to talk to Tobin and ask for a second chance. She moves her head and does the same. “Lex,” Tobin speaks, her voice low, “neither of us knew what was really going on, okay?” Alex nods. “I know we need to talk more, but let’s just get out of here, go to your place and catch up on some sleep and we’ll talk later, okay?” She says, her voice still low and sleepy.Alex nods her head, “Okay.” “I know it’s not the best thing to eat, body wise,” Tobin admits, “but a greasy burger after being sick is the bomb.” She says, taking a bite. “I know what you mean,” Alex hums as she takes a bite of her chicken sandwich. They’re at Alex’s house, sitting on the couch, TV on as they eat. Tobin dips a fry in her chocolate shake, humming as she chews it. “That is so disgusting.” Alex crinkles her nose as she watches her. “You have to try it.” Tobin holds a shake covered fry in front of her. Alex takes it. “How could this be so good?” She questions as Tobin lets out a giggle. “Your face is priceless.” She laughs. Alex had texted Syd, Karen, Cindy and Allie, letting them know Tobin was feeling better and they were going to be at her house for day or two. Alex apologized for the mess of papers and crates strewn around her living, briefly explaining to Tobin why it was so messy. There was something in the look Tobin gave her that Alex didn’t understand. It was a mix of understanding and some gratitude and something else. She couldn’t place it. “I set an alarm to get up in a few hours. You need to eat more, I swear you lost weight over night.” Alex says, turning back from her nightstand where she set her phone down. Tobin yawns, “Okay,” she says sleepily. She scoots over against Alex, nuzzling her head onto her shoulder. Alex smiles as she brings her arms around her, feeling Tobin’s cast on her leg. She scratches Tobin’s back lightly. “Mmmmm,” Tobin hums, “that feels so good,” she whispers. “Go to sleep, sweetie,” Alex says, kissing the top of her head. Alex grabs her phone, shutting off the low chime. She yawns and looks over at Tobin and sees her blinking at her. “Hi,” she whispers. “Hi,” Tobin whispers back, eyes darting around the room, her head still. “You’re at my place,” Alex explains quietly, “it’s over, you’re safe.” Tobin nods silently, a lone tear leaking from her eye. Alex slides over to her, lying face to face, she strokes her hair, “It’s okay. It will take a little time.” Tobin nods and sniffs, “Yeah,” she says. They eat a quiet dinner and now Tobin is on couch, covered in a blanket, on her phone. She’s been quiet this evening as Alex silently sorts through the papers, methodically arranging them. She’s on her knees by the couch, collecting the different documents on the ottoman, one eye on Tobin who is growing drowsy. She’s afraid Tobin’s upset with her, that she let her down. She’s worried this is too much for her to handle and will want to break up.Alex is doing a bang up job of working herself into a tizzy as she turns the corner, back to Tobin, sniffling as the emotions of her thoughts begin to overrun her good judgement. Maybe that’s why Tobin hasn’t really questioned her on the details of what happened, she doesn’t care, she just wants to feel better and then get the fuck away from her. Maybe she thinks she’s still dreaming and this is some weird everlasting nightmare. Maybe Tobin feels trapped here, with her. She turns the next corner to face Tobin, wiping her eyes as she works, mumbling to herself that she’s crazy to think Tobin would want to be with her, especially after all of the suffering she did. Physical, mental, who would want to be with a freak like me, who sees ghosts but didn’t know what the fuck to do to help her, she asks herself. “I do,” Tobin’s soft voice says. Alex looks up to see her sleepily staring at her from the couch. She’s lying across it, on her side, blanket wrapped up high on her head, only her face peaking out. Alex’s eye widen when she realizes she was speaking aloud. Speaking aloud and Tobin heard her. Tobin just looks at her. “I want to be with you, Lex,” she says, her voice still rough and throaty from all of the screaming she’s done these past few days. Alex sets the papers in her hands down. Wiping her face, resting her butt on the back of her legs. Staring back at Tobin. “You do?” “I do.” Tobin says thickly, “Do you want to be with me?” she asks shyly, quietly. “More than anything,” Alex admits. Tears flowing again. Tobin nods, giving her a small, sleepy smile. It reminds Alex of the smile from the video of her after her ankle surgery. “Everything else will work out, okay Lex?” Tobin looks at her expectantly. “Just, maybe we should chill for a while longer, and then we can go over it all.” Alex nods, “That’s a good plan.” Tobin studies her, that small smile still on her face, “You look tired,” she says softly. “I am kinda beat.” Alex admits. Tobin’s eyes shift downward, Alex sees a nervousness cross her face. “Would you maybe,” Tobin begins, clearing her throat, “would you maybe want to snuggle?” A sound escapes Alex’s mouth, a cross between a soft sob and a sigh of relief, she springs on her knees, “Absolutely.” she smiles. Tobin’s eyes light up, a grin appears as she scoots back on the couch, raising an arm to open the blanket for her. Alex slides in front of her, Tobin wrapping her arm around her.“Let me be big spoon,” she murmurs, sliding her other arm under her to hold her tightly. “You’re too good for me,” Alex whispers, feeling overwhelmed by Tobin’s kindness. “No,” Tobin says, snuggling into her neck, “we’re good for each other.” She rubs her arm and they drift off. Hours later they awake, both feeling better. Tobin is still a little weak, a little wobbly on her crutches but she’s definitely feeling better. Her body is tired, like she’s had the flu, worn and sore. “Babe?” Tobin nudges Alex’s leg that’s sprawled across her lap as they eat ice cream. “What?” Alex looks up. “Would you mind if I go hang out with my Mom tomorrow? She’s coming in tomorrow night.” Tobin states. “Oh, sure, of course.” Alex nods her head. “Like, would you be cool if I stayed with her overnight?” Tobin ask slowly. Alex nods. “I just think she could help me process this,” Tobin explains, “help me think it through and get my head straight.” “She’s a smart lady. You should stay with her while she’s here.” Alex agrees. If you only knew Tobin, she thinks. She’s glad that Cindy’s coming out. She hopes she gets a chance to see her. “Would you mind coming to my house on Sunday for lunch? Get to visit?” Tobin asks. “My Mom wants to see the house.” “You want me to do a ghost sweep or something?” Alex arches an eyebrow at her. “Well, what’s a gift if you don’t use it?” Tobin arches an eyebrow right back at her. She tilts her head at her, “I’d really like you to be there the first time I go back.” She adds quietly. “Then I’m there.” Alex answers. “Want me to bring lunch? That Italian place?” “That would be terrific.” Tobin smiles at her. “Oh, I’m getting a new bed delivered too, sometime between one and five.” Alex tilts her head at her.“I ordered it online.” Tobin explains. “Oh,” Alex nods. “New comforter, too?” she questions. “I’ve got an old one to use for now, thought we could shop together later.” Tobin says, shrugging. “I’d like that.” Alex says quietly, using her foot to rub to poke the outer side of Tobin’s leg. “Me too,” Tobin smiles back, rubbing her foot. They go to bed soon after that, Tobin insisting on holding Alex through the night. January 27, 2018 Alex is lying on her stomach, facing out towards her room when she hears a strange noise. She cracks open a tired eye, scrunching her forehead trying to identify it. She glances at the clock on her nightstand. It’s 3:45. She sighs, the fucking bewitching hour, she thinks, still out of it. Then she hears the crying. Tobin. She lifts her head up, turning quickly to see Tobin on her back, arms above her head, tossing her head from side to side. She’s crying, Alex can see the reflection of the wetness on her cheeks in the moonlight. “No! NO! NO!” Tobin is chanting, it’s getting louder as she gets more worked up. “Tobin!” Alex calls loudly her voice raspy, “Wake up!” She clicks on the lamp beside her. She sees Tobin appearing to be straining against some sort of invisible bonds holding her hands to the mattress. She reaches out and grabs her forearm. “Tobin!” She says loudly, shaking her arm.Tobin’s eyes fly open, fear evident as she looks at Alex. “N-n-n-n-nooooo!” she yells, pulling away from her, a tangle of arms and legs, she’s caught in the comforter sliding off the bed with it as she launches herself from it. Alex is up on her hands and knees, watching, a mix of emotions filling her. “It’s okay,” she says softly, “it’s just a dream.” Tobin looks at her, eyes wild, breathing heavy, clumsily moving away from the bed, crawling backwards on the floor. She hits the wall and stops, leaning against. She gathers the comforter around her, covering herself, pulling it tightly as if that will keep her safe. She stares at Alex, her eyes full of distrust, panting, breathing loudly through her nose. Then her eyes darting around the room. Alex slowly moves and sits on the bed. The fleeting thought of Christen coming back and doing this enters her mind. She shakes it away. “You’re here, at my house.” Alex explains quietly, “Christen can’t hurt you. It’s just a dream.” “It always starts out as you,” Tobin replies, “you tricked me.” She accuses her as she pulls the comforter closer. “That’s over now, Christen is gone.” Alex racks her foggy brain to think of something to comfort her. “It’s just me, just me now. Christen won’t come back. I won’t turn into her.” Alex can see Tobin’s not all there yet, awake but not fully conscious. She has to be patient. Tobin just shakes her head. “It was a nightmare.” Alex says slowly, “You’re just remembering what happened to you.” Tobin’s eyes drop down, looking at the floor in front of her. She glances around. Alex sees she’s fully awake now. Alex slowly moves to the edge of the bed, sitting so her legs dangle off the side. “You were dreaming of what happened, not something new. Christen’s gone.” “You hurt me.” Tobin whispers. The pain that Alex feels from that makes her put her hand to her chest. Tears begin to flow. She feels helpless. She doesn’t know what to do. She slowly slides off the bed onto her knees. “Tobin,” she cries, “I would never hurt you.” She says, her voice raw, “I love you.” Tobin’s eyes go wide, her head leaning back against the wall, softly thumping it. Her mouth is slightly open, staring at Alex as her head tilts slowly as she comprehends what Alex just said. “You do?” she breathes out, scrunching her forehead. “Yeah,” Alex nods her head as she cries, “I love you. I love for how kind you are, and how you’re always so supportive of me. I love you for how calm you can be when I’m too high strung and how rational you are when my thoughts run away from me. I love you even when you click the channels so fast I can’t see what’s on TV, or how you leave your shoes at the door and I trip on them. I love you for how safe you make me feel when I’m in your arms.” She takes a deep breath, tilting her head to look at her. “I love you.” Tears form in Tobin’s eyes as she smiles softly at her. “I love you, too.” She says quietly. She looks down, biting her lip, nodding her head. Alex is quiet. “This has really fucked me up, Lex,” Tobin says slowly, “I don’t know how to deal with this yet.” “I want to help,” Alex replies, “if you’ll let me.”Tobin nods, her throat holding back a sob. Alex crawls across the floor, Tobin moving her arm to let her under the comforter. Alex holds her, Tobin leaning her head on her shoulder. “Tell me something to give me good dreams,” Tobin says, her voice shaky and tired. Alex wraps the comforter around their legs, bringing it up around her shoulders. “I had a dream we were on a beach…” she begins quietly. Tobin falls asleep before her third sentence and Alex keeps talking until she’s sure Tobin is out. She feels Tobin’s body become limp, finally at rest. She lays her head against Tobin’s, sighing, thanking God for this amazing woman in her arms. She thanks God again for this gift he gave her, being able to see ghosts, because for the first time in her life, she used it for a very good reason. She knows her and Tobin have a ton of things to work out, but she’s comforted knowing that Tobin is willing to listen. Maybe they can work something out with her telling Christen’s story. Maybe they can compromise. She doesn’t know how she’ll tell her there’s a body in her backyard or that she thinks there’s something about Ellie they need to find out. But she knows that when the time is right, Tobin will listen. She won’t treat her weird because she sees the dead, she trusts her. And Alex trusts just as much. She knows she’ll have to be patient with Tobin, trying to understand how she was assaulted by a ghost will be no easy thing to overcome. How Tobin would react to being intimate with her. She knows she needs to figure out how to deal with aggressive spirits, even though she hopes she never encounters one again. She knows they have to do this together. She knows Cindy will be able to help Tobin, she’s not sure if she’ll tell her about her own experiences or choose to wait until Tobin is more stable about the whole incident. She’s just got this gut feeling that Cindy will be able to help her. She prays she will. She listens to Tobin’s even breathing, trying to fight the thought of what she suffered at the hands of Christen. She feels her story is important to tell, but she won’t let it come between her and Tobin. Someone else could write it, if need be. Hell, Tobin would have to grant permission to use the material before anything could happen. If she really was against it, she could just burn it all. Somehow she feels Tobin wouldn’t do that. They just need some time. Time to heal. Time to process. Time to overcome what they went through. She sighs, thinking about her beach dream, the call of seagulls overhead, the waves crashing, the sun warming her skin. She falls asleep easily, there, on the floor of her bedroom, leaning against the wall, knowing the days and maybe months ahead will be challenging, but they’ll get through it together. Fini