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Tony was in love with Clay. Clay was probably the only person who wasn't aware of this. In fact, it was his attraction to Clay that helped him realize he was gay in the 6th grade. Clay was straight, however, and Tony would never risk his friendship with him. So he kept it hidden. He very rarely allowed himself the chance to even think about Clay when he enjoyed a private moment in the shower. He had dated Ryan and now Brad close together, so the need to get himself off wasn’t strong. He had handsome boys to fuck. However, the desire for Clay had been growing. With all those brothers, Tony rarely got a moment alone.He parked his car on the hill, his favorite spot. He started slow, rubbing himself through his jeans. He pushed Brad or anyone else out of his mind, and let his thoughts flicker to Clay, innocent and unsure, touching another mans cock for the first time. He pulled his cock out of his pants and opened the center console, pulling out some lube hidden in a lotion bottle. He slicked up his cock, and imagined it was Clay’s hand on him; Clay would be slow and hesitant at first, growing bolder as he heard the sounds Tony made. Tony grabbed a rag from the center console, barely covering his cock before he came. He made the decision right there to indulge in one fantasy, pretending Brad was Clay. He knew it was wrong. He wasn’t being fair to Brad and he felt guilty about that. But he couldn’t help himself. Maybe, just once, if he let himself pretend, he could get it out of his system. And then it would be better. He could focus on his relationship with Brad, a relationship that had a chance to go somewhere.Three days later, Tony and Brad were kissing on Brad’s bed. “Brad,” he whispered, kissing him softly. “I want to do something different.” Brad kissed back, slowly rubbing his hand on the crotch of Tony’s jeans, feeling him harden.“Anything,” he responded.Tony hesitated now. He was a strict top. He had lost his virginity to an older man, who didn’t take his time, causing Tony severe pain, refusing to stop when Tony asked. Tony hadn’t let anyone take him since, and purposely dated boys who were ok with this. Anything involving his own ass was strictly off limits. Ryan, for example, was an obvious bottom. Ryan tried to finger him once and Tony shut him down so fast. He didn’t even touch himself that way. But even in fantasies, he preferred some realism. And someone like Clay, who had been straight his whole life, probably wouldn’t want to jump in to letting Tony fuck his ass. So tonight he was going to let Brad take him. He was anxious but also knew he could trust Brad. This made him feel even more guilty, he was using this wonderful, patient boy.“I want you to fuck me tonight.” Brad looked surprised.“Are you sure?” Tony had shared with him his previous bad experience. Tony nodded, trying to relax.“Yes. Just please go slow. And use lots of lube. You need to stretch me first.” Brad was clearly resisting the urge to roll his eyes.“I know how to do this, Tony, I was pretty versatile before you.” Something on Tony’s face changed Brad’s tune though, and his face softened. He leaned in to kiss Tony, whispering “i’ll take care of you.” Tony nodded, leaning back and letting Brad remove him pants. Brad kissed him, gently working his way down Tony’s body. His cock was still soft, probably nerves, and Brad leaned over, gently licking a long strip up the bottom. Tony gasped, closing his eyes, giving over to his fantasy. It wasn’t Brad, but Clay’s mouth on him.“Go very slow, I want to make this last,” he whispered. If it was too fast or skilled, it would break the fantasy. Brad stopped for a second, coming back up to Tony’s face. He kissed him gently, then took Tony’s face in his hands, making sure he was looking right at him.“Tony, if at any point you want to stop, tell me. I promise it’s fine. You are in control, ok?” Tony nodded, taking a deep breath. Brad started slowly, licking at Tony’s cock, gently sucking on the head. His hand fondled Tony’s balls gently, occasionally letting one finger trace the skin behind his balls. Eventually, he let one finger gently circle his hole. Tony tried hard not to tense but he couldn’t help it. Brad stopped, looking up at Tony’s face. Tony winced. This fantasy wasn’t going the way he wanted, and he would never pull it off if he couldn’t calm down. Brad moved back up Tony’s body. He kissed him, letting his tongue trace lazy circles in his mouth. When he felt Tony relax and give into the kiss, he let his hand slowly slide down Tony’s body. He stopped kissing long enough to whisper in his ear.“Maybe it’ll be better if you can see my face when I touch you.” Tony nodded; it was easier to feel Brad’s fingers down there when he was kissing him, whispering sweet sentiments at him. After a few minutes of this, Brad asked Tony if he was ready for a finger.“Use lube, please,” Tony whispered, fear in his voice. Brad kissed him hard.“Baby, of course. I promise you it will feel good. I’m going to go slow. We can just do fingers today, we won't have to do anything you don't want.” There was a slight moment of fear when Brad first breached him with his finger. He couldn’t help but tense up. This time he had to open his eyes, needing to see Brad. This grounded him, and Brad gently kissed the insides of Tony’s thighs, whispering sweet words of comfort. Brad nuzzled Tony’s completely soft cock, gently sucking and nibbling on the head. Slowly Tony felt himself relax, his cock hardening slightly. Brad glanced up at Tony, who nodded. Brad took this as an ok to slowly start moving his finger, slowly stretching him out.He stopped mouthing at Tony for a second to ask, “Are you ready for another one?” Tony nodded, and Brad slowly slipped a second lubed finger in. This time he crooked his finger, gently stroking inside. Tony bucked slightly, his cock hardening the rest of the way. “That’s my guy,” Brad whispered, continuing to pepper Tony’s stomach and thighs with kisses and licking his cock gently. A third finger entered easily, and soon Tony was ready, his cock leaking onto his stomach. Brad licked up the pre-cum while gently removing his fingers. He reached over for a condom, sliding it on himself before lubing up. He leaned over Tony, giving him a soft kiss.“You ready, baby?” he asked. Brad then hesitated. “It might be easier if you were on your hands and knees.” This was the moment of truth. On his hands and knees he could continue the fantasy. Tony looked into those deep brown eyes and realized he was ready. But he was ready for this with Brad, not Clay. Suddenly he didn’t want the fantasy. He wanted the real thing. This was something he wanted Brad for. Sweet, good Brad, who had been so patient and understanding. Brad, who’s cock was bright red from neglect but hadn’t complained once. He had made this entire moment about Tony, and now Tony wanted to do the same for him.“No,” he said, speaking his first words in awhile. “I want...I need to be able to see you.” Brad nodded and spread Tony’s legs further, lining up his cock with his hole.“You need me to stop or slow down, you let me know, ok? Whatever you need.” He slowly pushed in, watching Tony’s face closely for any sign of discomfort or fear. Tony tensed slightly when the head first breached him, but Brad stilled his hips, and stroked Tony’s cock while whispering gently to him. Tony had softened a bit at the intrusion, but now he relaxed, breathing slowly. Brad entered him completely, stilling and letting him adjust. He reached a hand down, gently rolling Tony’s balls in his hand, squeezing lightly. Tony’s eyes stayed open, and a light smile was on his face.“Thank you, Brad,” he said, bucking him hips slightly to indicate Brad could start moving. Brad began to pull in and out slowly, adding a bit more lube before moving his hand to Tony’s cock, stroking his length in time to his thrusts, bringing him back to full hardness. All fear had left Tony. Brad looked beautiful above him, leaning over him, putting all his attention on Tony. He felt full, but it was good. All the damage from before was washed away. He now understood how good it felt, how good it could be, with the right person. Brad continued his long, slow strokes, managing to add more lube without breaking the rhythm.“Let me know when you get close,” Brad whispered. “It might be too much for you after you cum, let’s try to go together, ok?” Tony nodded. Brad leaned down and kissed him. “Still doing ok, babe?” Tony nodded, giving Brad a small smile to let him know he was ok. Tony took over stroking his own cock, giving Brad a chance to focus fully on his thrusting. Soon, Tony began to feel the signs in his balls, and he let Brad know. Brad picked up the speed, and Tony matched it. Suddenly Brad thrust hard once, and stilled. This sent Tony over the edge, and he came across his stomach.“That was great,” Tony sighed. Brad kissed him, then apologized.“I’m sorry, babe, this might hurt a bit when I pull out.” Tony nodded.“I’m ready.” Brad pulled out slowly, watching Tony’s face for discomfort. He couldn’t help but wince, and when Brad finally was out, panic hit him quickly. Brad quickly leaned in, kissing Tony and saying the sweetest things, until Tony’s breath stilled.“I’m sorry,” he whispered, embarrassed at panicking at the end. Brad shook his head.“It happens, don’t worry. I’m going to get something to clean us off, ok?” Brad waited for Tony’s nod before getting up. He returned a few minutes later, condom disposed of, holding a warm washcloth. He gently wiped away the lube from Tony’s sore, swollen hole.“I’m sorry, baby,” Brad whispered. Tony shook his head.“It’s ok, it’s not too bad...not looking forward to my next shit though.” Brad rolled his eyes.“Well, before that….” and he smiled. Tony’s eyebrow raised. “I’m not done yet,” Brad whispered, kneeling back down under Tony.“What are you...oh” Tony’s words cut off as Brad’s tongue licked around his sore hole. It felt amazing, being taken care of like this.“I thought you might be sore and this would help. Or I can run a bath for you, warm water might help.”“No, this is perfect, you are perfect,” Tony whispered, throwing his head back in pleasure. Brad continued to slowly lick around his hole gently. Tony fisted his cock; it was too soon to cum again, but the sensation felt good. Finally Tony grabbed Brad and pulled him up. He kissed Brad, not even caring where his mouth had just been.“Brad, you did so much for me, what can I do for you?” Brad smiled.“Babe, you already did plenty. You trusted me to help you through something, and that means the world to me.” His grin got a bit cheeky. “It was really hot, too. You felt amazing.” Tony grinned.“I wouldn’t mind doing that again, with you,” he told Brad. They snuggled down under the covers, ready for a nap.“Brad, I love you.”