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Luke remained in the boys' locker room, nude guys walking past his narrow stall causing him to shield his wondering eyes better. He didn’t wish to look up; he didn’t wish to look at them. He kept peeking, though, puzzled at his brain. In his head, all he could think was dickdickdick but he shouldn’t be thinking that, especially not when he had a girlfriend who was too good for him. “Luke, mate, are you alright?” He overheard someone laugh making him open his eyes and there stood a charming dark-skinned bloke with a towel draped around his abdomen. His toned chest almost made Luke’s mouth water and his V-line looked so prominent. all he wanted to do was drive his fingers down his chest, licking and touching. “What the fuck? Quit staring bro, it’s weird.” Luke was snatched out of his daydream and he felt his face and neck heat up with unease and embarrassment. What was happening to him? He should be thinking about his very hot girlfriend who had wonderful breasts and not a dick. He thus concluded that everybody had those thoughts, not just him. Of course, they do, who couldn’t? Guys were beautiful and he thought that every male at least thought about it. “you’re just sooo hot.” luke joked, or was it a joke? not really, but it was the only way to hide.Once Luke finally finished changing back to his clothes, he hurriedly disappeared out of the locker room. He felt so drowned in there; like the walls were closing in on him and he couldn’t do anything about it. He had been having these, well, unholy thoughts for years now, but ever since he actually became a jock, they had been growing worse. Maybe because he was constantly enveloped by sweaty guys, which he kind of liked but again didn’t. Everything was puzzling to him. Why didn’t he think of Gracie, his girlfriend, like that? Why didn’t he think of any girl like that? Talking of Gracie; as soon as he left the sweaty locker room, he felt her small arms wrap around his waist. She sank her face into his chest as she applauded him on the game. Luke smiled but felt his heart twist in remorse.“We should go back to mine to celebrate. My parents are out of town.” Gracie said seductively with a flirtatious wink, her long fingernail trailing down Luke’s chest before halting at the top of his jeans. Her request didn’t excite Luke, however, it did terrify him. They’ve done stuff before, not that he was never absolutely in it, and he always seemed distant but she never acknowledged. He chuckled nervously and coughed, grasping her hands and kissing her makeup covered nose.“Maybe later, babe.” He strolled to his car immediately and she followed behind like a lost puppy, her lips in a slight pout. She was just so confused why he was never up for anything, well she had a sense of what it was, but she didn’t want to believe it. Once he opened the door to his car, she promptly shut it and moved in front of him, her face distorted in both hurt and anger. He had never experienced her like that; she was always lively and let Luke do what he wished.“Who is she? Is she prettier than me? Better than me?” Gracie gritted her teeth and balled her fists. “You’re cheating on me, aren’t you?” Her eyes started to well up as she ranted on about him cheating. Luke didn’t know what to do so he just hugged her. He shouldn’t have done that because, even though he didn’t cheat, this would have been a perfect excuse to leave her, as sad as it sounded. He didn’t feel anything for her. Maybe he was broken. The only feelings he felt towards her were guilt and disgust.“I would never cheat,” Luke spoke smoothly, glancing at her face. She looked so relieved when he announced that, which pained him further. His whole body was telling him to say he did cheat. His whole body was telling him to quit leading her on, but he couldn’t do it. He may not like her, but seeing her sad hurt him and made him feel sick, and it hurt worse since he was the reason. He made this girl believe they were in love, but he was just using her as a sort of test, to see if he truly did like her, but he had previously established that he did not. Her face broke into a beam as she pulled him into the car, sitting on his lap. He tried not to grimace as her lipstick covered lips trailed to his ear where she nipped at the soft skin. Gracie smirked as she started kissing him, which shortly turned into making out. It didn’t feel nice. It felt forced and sloppy, it felt wrong. He kept imagining her lips rough and her hands strong. He wanted them to grasp his hips roughly and show him how to kiss properly. But all he felt were soft, small hands fisting his shirt to try and pull it off. He lightly pushed her off, panting.“What’s wrong?” Gracie pouted, her lipstick smudged around her mouth messily from the makeout session before. She tried to climb back on his lap but he shook his head, starting up the car. He truly didn’t want to go any further with her, especially today. He felt off. Usually, he would just do it because, although he didn’t want to do it with her, he still got off from it. It never was the best, but it was something and sometimes he needed that release, but today he didn’t want to do anything. He felt drained, both mentally and physically. All Luke seemed to do was think. He thought about everything; his unnatural lust for men and his distaste for women. He didn’t say a word and just drove her home, parking in front of her house. She sighed but didn’t leave, crossing her arms over her chest. “Can I just go back to yours? I want to cuddle.”“Just cuddle?” Luke raised an eyebrow and started to drive back to his house. She nodded with a sad expression, her hands on her lap while they picked at her nails. She looked tense and awfully quiet. Usually, she’d be ranting to him about people at school, how much she hated them. Maybe he was a little harsh on her. “Look, I’m sorry. I’m just not feeling up for it today - I have a lot on my mind.” He exhaled and parked at his house, unlocking the car. She nodded understandingly and said no more, not wanting to press the matter.Later that night, he and his family sat for dinner. The family grabbed hands and started to say grace, thanking God for their meal although this was a little different. “- and please guide us to a more normal way of life and cleanse us so that we may be free of sin.” As Luke’s father spoke, he eyed the boy as if he was hinting at something, nevertheless the jock didn’t say anything.—The next day Luke was extra hyped. It was the soccer tournament the next day and he couldn’t wait. He truly did enjoy the sport and wanted to perhaps pursue it in the future and his coach thought that would be the case. He was an exceedingly talented male. The soccer team were to go to the other side of the county to play a series of games and whoever wins will receive a massive check for the school. Also, there will be scouts there, and Luke was hoping he could capture their attention. The golden-haired boy dashed to his teammates and wrapped his arms around their shoulders, grinning wide. “All ready for the tournament, boys?” As he spoke, the two blokes awkwardly pushed him off and shuffled away, murmuring. He thought nothing of it and made his way to his locker.“His parents really did that? - Shh, he’s coming.” A voice said as he strolled to the small group of people, some people turning elsewhere. Gracie started to make out with him before Luke pushed her off after a little while. His friend observed, his locker open with pictures of boobs and women all in the inside. Gracie quickly kissed his cheek them skipped away to go greet her classmates.“Don’t you hate when they do that.” The tall jock murmured, wiping his mouth. He opened his own locker to pull out his books. His locker sure was covered on the inside with pictures, but they weren’t of half-naked girls. They were of shirtless guys, or guys wearing tight clothes that showed off their amazing build. The guy who remained beside him shook his head with a small scoff.“No, it’s hot.” his friend answered and examined as Luke walked off. Just as he did, his friend went to the other's locker and seized the picture of the half naked male, setting it in his bag for safe keeping.On the way home after the long day, the drive was unusually quiet. Gracie was there too as she had demanded that they leave together and cuddle again like last time, and Luke just had to give in when he saw her pout like that. Plus he was having such a positive day and didn’t want to spoil it with arguing with her. The couple wandered into the house to see Luke’s family all sitting on the couch, his friends there too. He was confused, to say the least. “Remember people, we’re supporting not accusing.” He overheard someone mutter to the individuals he knew, who smiled and nodded.“Ah, Luke, you’re back.” An odd man chirped as he rose up from the couch where he was previously sitting. He was wearing a pastel blue turtleneck that seemed to adhere perfectly to his chubby looking body that read, ‘straight is great’. His legs were covered with bright blue shorts that reached to his mid thigh and it almost made him laugh out loud. “I’m David, and I’m an ex-gay.” The man who Luke now identified as David, stook his hand out in which he shook. This felt wrong. The atmosphere didn’t feel like home, it felt heavy. He felt as though he was suffocating. What did he mean by ex-gay?“Lucas, we’re afraid you’re being influenced by a way of thinking that’s… unnatural.” His mum said, standing up with caring eyes and open arms. He flinched at her saying his full name. His whole body froze up and he felt like he was chained to the ground. David had a merry grin on his face. He was a somewhat chubby guy and tanned, his hair slicked back. His voice held a lisp as he spoke too. He stood with his palm on his hip and his legs crossed over one another. Luke was still puzzled. He didn’t know what the hell his mum meant by that and the whole room could see that.“We think you’re- you’re gay.” His dad said hastily, sneering at the word. The older male hated the way it echoed and he certainly hated the fact that his son may be it. His religion told him that being homosexual was a sin, and that was how he was influenced to think.“You always seem out of it when you’re kissing me, and I’ve caught you watching the other guys,” Gracie chimed in and exhaled, her small hands by her side. “They’re gonna help you, and I’ll wait for you. When you come back, you’ll be normal again and you’ll be mine.” She sounded genuinely concerned and it angered Luke, but he wanted to be normal again. Maybe these thoughts really were unholy. His friends also started to talk, showing him the pictures that he had in his locker.“You’ll live with us until you’re a heterosexual.” David chirped and slapped his hands together. That was when Luke spotted a suitcase by the door; his suitcase. He felt sick. They wanted to change him. They wanted him ordinary. His chest seemed to tighten up at the mere thought of change since he never could deal with it. Change ruined everything and he hated it. “Look, Luke, I was formerly a gay but now I realise how wrong I was and now I’m a happy heterosexual because of True Directions.” The man spoke with a caring expression.“I’m not gay. You have this all wrong.” Luke said and he sounded sincere. He truly didn’t believe he was gay. He glanced around the room to see the people who were so close to him, look down at him like he was lesser of a person. That infuriated him because he wasn’t. He didn’t see what they saw and why they assumed he was gay.“Denial is a natural part of the healing process that we’ll explore at True Directions,” Daniel responded with a slight chuckle after, clapping his hands. Luke just gave him a glimpse. Denial? He can’t be in denial since there’s nothing to deny.“Healing?” Luke asked and twisted to look at his mum.“Like rehab for homosexuals, dear.” His mum muttered to her son. Even the mere mention of the word sent a sour taste in her mouth, well it did for everybody except for Luke. He didn’t understand what was going on. It was so overwhelming. He didn’t understand why everyone was calling him a homosexual since he plainly wasn’t one. After that, his parents explained that he’d be there for a few months which meant he wouldn’t be able to attend the soccer tournaments.—Driving there was misery. Half of the drive was deadly silent, everyone too afraid to speak in case someone might blow up, and they expected that would be Luke, then the other half was his parents talking about how proud they were that he was going to be normal again, and how they loved him more than anything. Funny thing was; Luke actually believed it. He glanced out the window and watched the bus drive past, his fellow teammates hanging out the vehicle with their shirts off, swinging it would while making loud sounds. He even saw someone throw water over them self which flooded through their shirt and showed off their chest completely. Luke almost started to drool. They soon arrived at the place which was an enormous, castle-like construction that was predominantly pink. The garden at the front even drew pink flowers.A woman wearing a pink blazer and pencil skirt walked out, her hair short and curled at the back. She looked fairly old, maybe in her late forties, early fifties. Next to her were two people, one male and one female. The male wore denim shorts that were way too short for him with a tank top, and the female wore a flannel, her hair even shorter than her brothers. “I’m Maria and these are my children,” She smiled politely at the small family. “This is Lydia and this is Rock.” She pointing to her daughter then her son, them smiling stiffly. “You’ve found him in the early stages. As soon as he goes off to college you can never really stop the homoerotic tendencies as they seem to manifest there, but we’ve managed to save a few.” She explained to Luke’s parents.His parents left and he was brought to a small area with a TV. There were clips of a happy male, beaming. He looked smart and manly, and the voiceover explained how his family were expecting him to be very successful, but then the next clip showed the man wearing lipstick and a pink shirt. “He made me do things with him and I just kept wanting more-“ The man spoke, tears welling up in his eyes. He described further about his homosexual experiences with tears in his eyes. He looked so ashamed. It then cut to him smiling with a female under his arm.“After two months, he discovered his masculinity and thus after two years he got married, happily to a woman.” The voiceover said and the video showed the couple kiss, then smile at the camera. It looked fake and uncomfortable.After the video had ended, he was led to an office where Maria sat. She had her legs crossed over one another with a grin. The room was pink. Everything from the floor to the ceiling was a shade of pink and it was hurting his eyes. “The first step is admitting you have a problem,” she spoke first. “When you see a man, naked in the locker room as he struts around you, or maybe he has a towel around his waist with his flawless body on show to you, you have none unnatural thoughts?” She asked, licking her lips. The thought almost made Luke bite his lip, but he stopped himself.“I don’t think it’s unnatural.” Luke shrugged and glanced at the woman, whose eyes seemed to go two sizes bigger at his remark.“So you don’t even know it’s wrong!” She gasped slightly. This was completely natural for many people when they start out the treatment. “It’s a sickness and we’re like doctors. You undergo treatment which will gradually but surely cure you of this- this disease.” She said it like it was something sickening, a grimace clearly displayed on her face as she spoke. She handed him a light blue hospital gown. “You will wear this until you admit you’re a homosexual.” She called in another male who wore a light blue button-up and a bright blue tie with matching shorts. The guy's hair was black and a messy mop on his head, but he somehow pulled it off.“Wake up at 7, breakfast at 8, group therapy until lunch, afternoon free time, family therapy on the weekends.” He revealed as he strolled down the halls until he arrived at the room. He opened the door and glanced inside, seeing what was inside. Six beds were lined up against the wall, all queen sized beds with blue covers. Everything was blue, even the ceiling was a pastel shade. A boy with pink hair laid on the very end bed, a cigarette between his lips as he read a book. “Ignore him,” the boy who showed Luke around whispered to him. “He constantly acts like he has a stick up his arse.” They wandered out to a massive board with a number of names and five boxes next to each name. Everyone except for Luke had their first box ticked. “The first step is admitting you’re a homosexual,” he murmured then stepped closer to Luke. “I am a homosexual.”After that, Luke was taken to a room where everyone was seated in a circle with a leather armchair in the midst. He sat down on the leather chair after being instructed to sit there and glanced around at the faces of all the individuals peering at him.“Hi I’m Casper and I love dogs. I’m a homosexual.”“Hello Luke, I’m Emily, lover of music and I’m a homosexual.”“I’m Mia and I love pain, I’m also a homosexual.”“Ian here, inspiring to be in the army, homosexual and lover of nature, nice to meet you, Luke.”“Hi I’m Michael, I like guys a lot and I’m a homosexual.”“I’m Rick. Dancer, singer, actor and homosexual.”More people introduced themselves, being very brief but all stating about them being homosexuals. Luke already knew that otherwise, they wouldn’t be there. “Why don’t you tell us the first time you discovered you might be gay?” Maria asked Luke with a curious look, having a small pink notebook resting on her lap. She started to make notes.“I’m not gay. I have a lovely girlfriend at home who I love and miss. I mean she’s smart and hot, and- and an excellent kisser.” He started to babble, not meaning to. Everyone noticed that his eyes didn’t show any meaning to what he was saying as if he truly did adore her.“But does she make you hot - like do you think of her at night?” Mia said with a small smirk, bobbing a piece of gum that was in her mouth.“I’m not a pervert!” Luke gasped and glared at the girl. “Look, I get perfect grades, I go to church, I’m a jock. I’m not like all of you. Everyone looks at guys all the time!” He seemed to almost snap but no one flinched. Luke was about as intimidating as a sick puppy.“Yeah but not everybody stares at guys in the way that you look at them.” Someone pointed out and a few others nodded after. Luke started to think about all the guys on his soccer team and how he’d peek at them when they were showing off their toned chests. He thought about the way his abdomen seemed to twist whenever he stared at them nude, and how it didn’t do that when he watched his girlfriend.“I assumed everybody had those thoughts — I-I just wanna be normal.” Luke finally replied after a lengthy hiatus. A few people smiled but he caught Michael rolling his green eyes at how pathetic the blond was. Normal? Being gay is normal for a gay person. “I’m a homosexual!” The blue-eyed boy announced and then repeated it again, being almost traumatised at the conclusion. Everyone grinned and hugged the babbling boy except for one person; Michael. You see, Michael was openly gay and the sole reason for why he was there was to make his parents happy. He hated the thought of changing for them.After a little while, everyone left but Luke stayed. He was seated in his chair, repeating about being a homosexual before Maria walked over with a pile of blue clothes in her hand. She lightly placed them on his lap and beamed, smoothing his back to comfort him.“You were right; I am a homo.”--At lunchtime, everyone was assembled around a small, pink table except for Michael of course. He sat on his own roundtable that was painted pastel blue. The sour pink haired boy sarcastically congratulated him, mocking everyone. “Don’t listen to him. He’s just mad that the meat on his plate is the only meat he can eat.” Rick stated and earned a few snickers and chuckles in response.“I can’t wait to be straight.” Some kid named John sighed dreamily, his head propped on the palm of his hand. He smiled at the thought. He seemed like a somewhat feminine person; not with his looks but by the way he operated and talked. He wasn’t able to express his femininity as they all had to wear a stupid uniform. Luke felt foolish in it. He was a muscular person so his muscles almost seemed to protrude out, but the other boys at the place didn’t mind. They enjoyed it.Later that night when Luke was in bed, he heard small buzzing sounds by his bed and muffled groans after. He slowly leaned over and tapped the person next to him, in which they popped their head out. He was an attractive man; cute hair and a round, squishable face. His skin was tanned too, which Luke admired a lot. “What’s that?” Luke asked, pointing to a short wand-like thing that had a little blue light at the top.“A shocker. Whenever you think of boys, you have to shock yourself.” The boy, who was called Calum, responded. He suddenly shocked his leg and groaned softly again as it pulsed through his small body. Luke muttered about it being “messed up” and “morbid”, receiving a small, half-hearted chuckle from the other guy. “You wanna start liking pussy? You gotta start training yourself.”Luke noticed something in the other boy's hand. It was Michael’s underwear. “Isn’t that Michael’s?” He claimed, puzzled as he eyed the cloth. When he acknowledged what Luke was talking about, Calum immediately dragged the sheets over his face with a small huff as the small zapping sounds the shocker continued. It even sounded louder than before. How horny was this guy?Luke settled down to go to sleep, and just as his eyes closed, the door swung open. Maria stood there with her hair locked in curling things and she wore a pink nightgown. “Your parents called.” She murmured, seemingly drained and fed up. Luke bolted up and followed the woman, then clutched the phone. His parents spoke a while, asking him how he was and if he was doing okay.“I’m a homosexual.” The golden-haired boy abruptly announced.“I’m glad you’ve finally admitted it! Now you can go to the next step and you’ll be normal in no time. We can’t wait for you to be home, pumpkin!” His mom chirped as he heard a light clap on the other end. She did that when she was excited. Luke was beaming bright, happy that his parents were proud of him and were still supporting him.
