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it was around ten o’clock at night on a wednesday. the sun was long gone and tiny pinpricks of light peaked their way through clouds. tiny coloured orbs of light reflected off of the windscreen of a black hyundai rolling its way through backstreets. a ping lit up on a propped up phone, a pinpoint on a map close by. the driver glanced over the request meekly and hit accept. no doubt another drunken middle aged woman coming home from drinks with her girlfriends. the man furrowed his eyebrows. he clicked his indicator lights on.
the location was, in fact, outside of a bar, and just as expected by the uber driver. he watched as someone came to approach his car. the door popped open. “taehyung, right?” a sweet male voice inquired. the words were slightly slurred.
“yeah,” the taehyung replied, smiling, “hop in.”
the man smiled sweetly and did so. “i’m jimin, by the way.” he introduced. he seemed intoxicated, he had the glow of someone that was. but he was quiet and had his hands tucked neatly in his lap.
“taehyung,” he begun, still slightly slurring his words, “i’m sorry for being drunk.” taehyung’s expression softened.
“it’s totally okay, i’ve had much worse,” he mused. “so where to?” he begun turning back onto the road,
“um, would it, ah... be alright if we just... drove around a little first? with the windows down?” maybe jimin was more intoxicated than had presented as, taehyung thought. he made a mental note of the vomit bags in the glovebox.
“of course,” he clicked the windows down and they were off.
taehyung was half driving down a quiet street and half leaning his body over trying to grab a plastic vomit bag. jimin’s eyes sparkled, lights reflecting off his irises as a small smile tugged his lips. from a sudden burst of energy, he outstretched his arm out the window, the other across the back of the car. he looked content with feeling the air running through his fingers. jimin closed his eyes. “hey, taehyung?” he murmured.
“yeah?”
“have you ever thought about dying?”
taehyung felt the whole world pause. he swallowed thickly.
“yeah, i guess i have.” taehyung gripped tighter on his steering wheel.
it was silent for a moment, jimin’s arms outstretched out the window with his eyes closed and taehyung gripping white-knuckled on his steering wheel.
“i have brain cancer,” jimin murmured quietly, “it’s gone too far to consider chemo.” he seemed too calm about this. taehyung felt his body grow cold. he heard his heart thundering against his ribcage.
taehyung was lost for words.
“i am dying.” he whispered, “but i am going to be okay.”
“i went out with all my friends tonight,” he continued, eyes still closed and a soft smile on his lips, “i told them i got called for an abroad job, and i’d accepted. they were ecstatic, so excited, so they threw me a party in celebration. we drank until we saw stars.” he paused for a second, “ah… i just… didn’t tell them that abroad was heaven.”
fuck.
taehyung’s eyes stung, his head pounded in rhythm with his heart. he took a deep breath, willing himself not to cry in front of jimin, his paying customer. his paying customer who has just told him that he’s dying, but he is going to be okay. “fuck,” he breathed, “jimin holy shit i…” he felt tears slip down his cheeks.
“it’s okay. you are so kind, taehyung.” jimin pulled his hand in from the window and folded his hands in his lap once again.
he winded the window back up and placed his head gently on it. swirls of his hot breath danced across the glass, and he just sat and watched, taking in his existence in the back of an uber. his soft smile never left his lips. taehyung thought for a second he might fall asleep.
“living wasn’t too bad,” he continued, “it really wasn’t. i’d met so many beautiful people, seen so many beautiful things.” he lifted his small hands up in front of his eye line. “but i am so confused as to why i know i am going to be okay...” taehyung glanced in his rear view mirror at jimin’s form in the back seat. the light shining in from outside kissed jimin’s hair and gave him a soft silver halo. it faded and came back with each passing light.
“you must be an angel,” taehyung suggested softly, “maybe they just want you home.” jimin smiled. “you are so kind, taehyung,” he repeated, “please don’t doubt that.”
after a few more minutes of driving around, jimin informed taehyung of his address. He continued to thank taehyung on the drive home, repeating that same phrase: “you are so kind, taehyung,” it hurt his heart a little bit, but he would stay composed for now. he waved him off out the window, jimin coming forward and interlacing both his hands momentarily together with taehyung’s. he’d whispered ‘thank you’ one last time before stepping back and smiling. pain tugged at taehyung’s throat. he winded up the window and drove away, turning off his uber app.
as soon as jimin’s house was out of sight, taehyung burst into hysterical tears. he cried and sobbed until his throat was scratchy.
“i am dying,” he whispered,
“but i am going to be okay.”