Archive of Our Own

Work Text

“If you want a happy ending that depends, of course, on where you stop your story.” Orson Welles“It's not unusual to be loved by anyone It's not unusual to have fun with anyone But when I see you hanging about with anyone It's not unusual to see me cry, I wanna dieIt's not unusual to go out at any time But when I see you out and about it's such a crime If you should ever want to be loved by anyone It's not unusual it happens every day no matter what you sayYou'll find it happens all the time Love will never do what you want it to Why can't this crazy love be mine?It's not unusual to be mad with anyone It's not unusual to be sad with anyone But if I ever find that you've changed at anytime It's not unusual to find out I'm in love with you” Tom Jones (It’s Not Unusual) “So why am I coming?” asked Joyce. Peggy and Stan just smirked at each other in response and then added “You will see, aside from seeing Yours Truly get interviewed by this British Broad with a large rack….” with Peggy giving Stan a playful smack with her purse. “But she doesn’t like girls, but she knows someone who does!” “Stan! You didn’t! Oh my God you are too much!” “What? Are you two talking about?”Peggy then turned and smiled sweetly at Joyce: it has been about 40 years since they first met and Margaret Olson Rizzo was still as beautiful as the day Joyce met her, only now more matured and stronger. She first noticed Peggy’s brilliant blue eyes, her slightly crooked teeth, soft face, her quiet observance and willingness to try new things; for a girl who dressed a bit behind the times (and yet pulled it off with those hairdos and her pluckiness), she proved herself a truly cool girl. A kind of coolness she couldn’t take on or off like a mini skirt or jacket. Now here she was: a successful career in advertising behind her, her and Stan happily married with Empty Nest Syndrome, more confident, knowing, and had been interviewed about her career by a foreign journalist.“The journalist from Britain, she mentioned she had a nice single friend she would like to play matchmaker and I decided to tell her that I have a friend about my age…and we decided to give it a shot and have a semi-blind date for the two of you!” Peggy laughed. Stan snorts, “Lucky for Bridget, Peggy liked her, she is kind of like Meredith was those years ago” and Peggy turns with a playfully dirty look “Bridget is no Meredith” and they both grimaced at the ditzy blonde secretary who had a plane thrown at her by Joan Harris. “What I was told by Bridget was that this girl is beautiful with a thin figure, tall, works as an assistant to her fiancé Mark at a law firm, and that she can speak Latin and ski while maintaining perfect shiny hair.” Joyce looks on with curiosity: “So a Megan?” and Stan whistled “I doubt she is truly a Megan. Plus that Bridget, what a very interesting match she made with Mark, he seems a bit weak for a woman with her energy and hot ass.” “That’s what people said when they found out we were dating!”“Well according to my father, he found me in a Swedish orphanage and there after we immigrated to the United States where we relied on the help of some aid societies for shelter and language classes and job training,” explained Michael “Ginzo” Ginsberg to a pretty, blonde woman in a nice pastel green cotton blend top with florals and a indigo blue short skirt. Joyce noted a few things here: Michael has gotten a lot of psychiatric help and he has mellowed out some, though he is still eccentric and bursts out, but he came far from the paranoid young man in disheveled clothing who cut his nipple off and for another, Stan wasn’t kidding, Bridget Jones is a gorgeous girl and Joyce noticed that she had an amply curvy figure that enhanced her clothing rather than the other way around. Joyce soon looked over and saw a tall, distinguished-looking man who looked as fit as Rizzo once did when she met him and she noticed he was a bit wound up, but was very much in awe of his fiancé. “As he should be,” smirked Joyce thinking of all the men she encountered who had amazing women for their wives or girlfriends, only to treat them like a dime a dozen. She looked quickly and saw a tall, young, thin woman next to Mark Darcy: she couldn’t make them out as being related to one another but saw how close they were to one another, a sort of intimacy that cannot be explained away as a romance, but something platonic and real. It was soon Stan’s turn to be interviewed by Bridget: “I started right after college free-lancing and people were soon impressed with my talent, about a decade later, I got a call requesting that I come work at Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce on a cold drops account with one of their copywriters, who is now my wife, and I was an ass. I gave her such a hard time and she really showed me up that night. Didn’t hurt that she looked cute doing it in a white Maidenform…”Joyce glanced and saw that the young woman was looking right at her. Joyce noticed more: the young woman was beautiful with long and shiny chocolate brown hair, very straight hair, wide brown eyes that took in everything and managed to be gentle, clear fair skin with rosy cheeks, barely any makeup, she was very tall and was not wearing any heels, her dress was simple yet feminine and practical (short sleeved cotton violet cardigan with matching scoop necked top underneath and bright yellow capris with some pink pearl ear studs), very thin not a lot of curves but very sweet, and she noticed the woman had very long and slim legs. Joyce smiled and thought to herself that she was lucky some of the youth fashions suited her (layered polo shirts updated her usual look) and she winked at the girl, who soon blushed and touched her concave stomach and Mark gave her a reassuring pat on the shoulder, whispering and smiling at her. The pair soon left, “Well there goes my chance,” thought Joyce. Maybe she ought to listen to others and resign herself to her unofficial widowhood and stop dating? Rebecca was significantly younger than her; she was probably older than the pretty girl’s mother. Peggy came by and massaged Joyce’s shoulders, “It will be alright, it’s not over, actually me and Bridget had some plans,” smirked the graduate of Miss Deaver’s Secretarial School 1960.After about an hour, Stan and Bridget came over, “Mark and Rebecca just came to Katz’s Deli to make a reservation for us all; they just called a table for six, would you like to join? Perhaps Becky wouldn’t feel surrounded by smug committed heterosexuals?” winked Bridget to Joyce. The older woman just noticed that Stan and Peggy were both smiling like the cat who ate the canary, “What is this all about?” she thought, “Sure,” she replied to the English Rose, “I can join in for lunch.” Whether anything came of this meeting or not, she was not going to let Becky feel like a token, or worse, like a wallflower.The reservation was well advised: Katz’s was always filled with a lot of people. The party of a young British woman and three American Senior Citizens made their way to the table reserved by Mark and Rebecca. Mark and Becky both looked happy to see the party, though the young woman did look a bit red in the face. Bridget wasted no time in her matchmaking scheme she cooked up with Peggy: “Mark, Becky you have met Stan and Peggy, this is their friend Joyce Ramsay. She worked as a photographer for Life magazine and travels a great deal across the pond from here to the UK on photographic assignments. Ms. Ramsay, this is my fiancé Mark Darcy and his assistant and our dear friend, Rebecca Gillies.” The women looked at one another intently, Joyce noticed Rebecca was not only beautiful, but she had an air of maturity about her and she had the same ambition that made Peggy so irresistible to her. They took each other’s hand, Joyce herself took very good care of her hands: soft and capable. But Becky’s hands were a whole level of competence and gentleness, still struck (and hoping she looked more smooth than she felt inside) Joyce replied “Hello Ms. Gillies, it’s finally nice to meet you in person after we have been staring at one another.”

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“I must have been through about a million girls

I'd love 'em then I'd leave 'em alone

I didn't care how much they cried, no sir

Their tears left me cold as a stone

But then I fooled around and fell in love

I fooled around and fell in love, yes I did

I fooled around and fell in love

I fooled around and fell in love
It used to be when I'd see a girl that I liked I'd get out my book and write down her name Ah, but when the, the grass got a little greener over on the other side I'd just tear out that page.” Elvin Bishop (I Fooled Around and Fell In Love)Joyce knew she liked girls the moment she saw Glinda the Good Witch of the North in a children’s matinee screening The Wizard of Oz: she was so regal, powerful, delicate, witty, and beautiful despite wearing a ridiculously wide pink gown. She thought other girls were pretty but this woman was phenomenal. Since then she noticed little things about girls: their glossy ringlets, the way they brush their hair, who looked fantastic in ruffles, the pink cheeks as they smiled, the smiles of the girls, their breathy voices and giggles, how they filled out those sweaters and concentrated on looping their letters ever so perfectly, how the socks were perfectly cuffed, and how they walked in their dungarees and full skirts rounded out by petticoats and straight skirts. It was maddening.Her first kiss with a girl was the summer she turned 12 and went to sleepaway camp where girls from Rye, Ossining, Cos Cob, Greenwich, Riverdale, Glen Cove, and the Philly Main Line went to “rough it” in the woods while wearing starched uniforms and the occasional fancy dress while dancing with the boys from the nearby military camp. It started off as a dare, the girls wanted to find out what it was like to kiss and how to properly French kiss, so 8 of them gathered in a circle around an empty Coke bottle and spun it around. Joyce spun her bottle and it pointed to beautiful (even at this awkward stage where pimples plagued her skin) and well dressed (without resorting to a lot of frou-frou wear), horse-riding Tara. Tara leaned in closer and Joyce could see how shiny her high ponytail was and how that dark red lipstick color looked incredible on her and her scent mixed with horse hair was oddly tantalizing, Joyce felt that Tara had a perfect precision with her tongue. Her only reaction was to utter “whoa nelly” and by the end of the game where Joyce had to kiss the large-framed, wavy haired, sweet Elaine (who was rapidly developing to the point where even the husky sizes were stretched over her chest), Joyce was already an expert. The girls departed, all with gifts of photos that Joyce developed in her spare time from summer camp activities (and that she bought with her allowance); she still had a group photo of them all in the hope chest her mother made her have.It was then that Joyce would initiate some “practice sessions” during her teen years. She’d prepare the snacks and drinks and Donna would bring some records over (Doris Day, Etta James, Bill Haley, and the very scandalous Elvis) and the girls would end up kissing, with a couple whispering to each other and deciding to meet. That was the way it went through high school: Joyce could say she kissed at least one girl from Future Homemakers of America, the Baton Twirlers, the Cheerleaders, the ballet dancers, the tennis players, the swim team, the yearbook club, the school newspaper, the honors society, and even from the photography club. She also smirked to herself that the boys who teased her about being flat-chested in the 8th grade practically fell over themselves trying to impress her not knowing she had no interest in them whatsoever.It was then that Joyce went to Vassar, where she joined in a lot of extracurricular activities and even won a prize where she worked a year at a magazine where she assisted some photographers in their work. It was there, where she was introduced to the artsy beatnik scene of New York and even started hanging out in some bars where she saw women close-dancing to “Sentimental Journey” and even kissing. She finally saw women doing their own thing, not giving a crap about men, women even dressing mannish! When she got back to Vassar, she met up with one of the graduating seniors: Ann and made out with her in an abandoned playhouse where they discussed D.H. Lawrence while smoking some cigarettes.But 1961 had to be the wildest for Joyce: she got hired at Life magazine and was taking all sorts of photographs, even to take some nudes (she was later in awe of those photos of Christine Keeler of the Profumo Scandal), she met up with beatniks and met people at some Bob Dylan and Peter, Paul, and Mary concerts like Abe Drexel, and she had some more hook-ups (some who remained her friends). And then came that day in 1965 where she stepped off from work with some documents into the elevator, only to stop at another floor where a young woman in a sturdy but not fashionable coat and hat. The young woman inquired about what she held, mistaking it for Joyce being rejected rather than merely handling another’s rejected photos. It was there Joyce noticed that the young woman possessed smooth, dewy skin and had a pink-coral color on her lips that made her features stand out: wide blue eyes that observed everything, smooth and woodsy brown hair with some gold highlights, a large nose that uniquely shaped an otherwise merely pretty face, small ears that stuck out, full lips with a slight overbite, and a very strong intellect with a keen sense that matched her eyes. She found out the young woman (Peggy Olson) was something other than a secretary and was impressed. She thought to meet that girl again; she remembered that she mentioned working at Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce and made a visit some morning. She walked into reception where she saw an old man in a bowtie with no shoes lounging on the sofa while the pretty receptionist (with a bit of an overbite and knowingness about Joyce’s proclivities, both in the bedroom and in activities) called Peggy and was kept in conversation with Joyce. They made a date to visit an art show where they had a good time in….and out after the police busted the place for weed. She also had gotten friendlier with Megan the receptionist (who was promoted to copywriter after marrying the Creative Director Don Draper) and with Peggy’s co-workers, Stan Rizzo (what a meathead!) and Michael Ginsberg, the former who teased Joyce and Peggy about lesbianism and Joyce teased back by licking Peggy’s cheek. It may have been hard: to see that she fell for a girl who was only attracted to men and to keep up her humorous sense of self. She was a good enough sport to set Abe and Peggy up, they lasted 3 years, she and Peggy remained friends so much longer.The rest of the decade moved by fast: she was promoted after posting the photos from the Student Nurse Massacre in ’66 and moved to San Francisco. While she was letting her hair down and meeting women, she got pieces of news from her friends on the East Coast (Megan left Don for Los Angeles and her burgeoning career in soap opera is in a slump, Peggy and Abe were no longer an item, Peggy felt isolated due to the post-break up awkwardness amongst their social group, Stan started a short relationship with a nurse named Elaine after trying to put the moves on Peggy, Peggy mooning over her boss Ted, Michael cut his nipple off and was sent to a mental hospital, Jeanine left a great job as head secretary at a magazine to get married, Chad was sent off overseas, Stan lost his cousin Robbie, Stan and Peggy finally got together, Megan got a divorce and a big settlement from her ex-husband, Michael is back to free-lancing, Tara had married a guy named Arthur Case and had some twins with him).One day, after setting up preparations for a viewing party of the moon landing and getting a raise after getting some hot photos from the Stonewall Riots in New York (Peggy put her in touch with Joan Harris, who lived about a block away, she said it was wild), she ran accidentally ran into a woman. “Ouch, aw shit, what is wrong with you……?” Joyce’s rage turned to curiosity as she looked at the woman in front of her. The woman was blonde, slim, she appears to have a natural tan with some freckles, had light green eyes, had a simple and prim form of dress, and her hair was cut in a shoulder-length page boy. “I’m so sorry,” answered the woman “I had to rush somewhere for the restroom, I didn’t mean to…” “No, it’s nothing, I am heading to this café here over there, I can take you there and you can use the restroom, I’m a regular.” “Oh thank you, I’m so sorry, my name is Carol McCardy, what is yours?”

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“Free, on my own is the way I used to be Ah, but since I met you baby, love's got a hold on me It's got a hold on me now I can't let go of you babyI fooled around and fell in love I fooled around and fell in love, oh yes I did I fooled around, fooled around, fooled around, fooled around, Fooled around, fooled around, fell in love Fooled around, fooled around, fooled around, fooled around, Fooled around, fooled around, fell in love I fooled around, fell in love I fell in love, I fell in love, yes I did.” Elvin Bishop (I Fooled Around and Fell In Love) It was just a coincidence, really. Joyce falling in love with a woman who used to be friends and roommates of Peggy’s co-worker, it really was. Carol told her she moved after disastrously confessing her love to her best friend, only for the friend to blithely dismiss it and insist on picking up some men to “empty their wallets” and she had been trying to “become normal” only to end up with some abortions and breaking off some relationships to be labeled “a mess”. Around the time her roommate met a surgeon and she had a job offer, Carol left New York City and the heartbreak and the shabby bosses who didn’t stick up for her for sunny California. It was in San Francisco where Carol ran into some girls who took her to Daughters of Bilitis and was able to find some contentment and happiness and was able to start working as an advisor to some college and high school literary magazines. A long way from the “slush pile” and from having to ask her father for money; now she was assertive enough to ask Joyce if she could join in on the viewing party…Joyce (surprisingly) stammered a “Yes”.Joyce and Peggy talked about the moon landing and the day after that: Peggy landed a major fast food account for her agency and Joyce slow-danced with Carol that very night after Neil Armstrong landed on the moon. “So you just filled your plates with the onion dip and you just had to hold her hand?” asked Peggy from Manhattan. “It was really that intense, I felt a wave of wanting her so bad, like I found someone I really want to be with.” “Well you’re lucky, I’m looking forward to a long time with my cat and nights filled with work.” Joyce giggled, “Hey I didn’t let Abe talk me into that side of town!” The girls both giggled at this.Carol and Joyce started dating right away, albeit thinly veiled in their professional lives: “I cannot have the administrators at my school know about me, I could lose my job, I just love working with those kids.” Joyce happened to have observed her at work with those kids: she was amazed at how sweet and accepting the slightly older woman was of the backgrounds those kids came from, even taking time to talk to them one-on-one on her time and even making appointments to urge their parents to encourage their children to make journalism and writing a part of their careers. “You really have to get down to their level and get to know them as people,” she said of the blue-collar parents she worked with, “they trust you more and are more willing to help their kids in this regard. They don’t want their kid to fail, which is the most important thing they want for them, they’re not really holding them back. It’s just they are unfamiliar with those worlds or they have had poor experiences with White people.” Joyce was amazed: she had spent years listening to Abe pontificate about the working man and how Negro people were disadvantaged since they were forced on boats, so he didn’t want to report the kid who mugged him. But it felt like Carol genuinely cared and was willing to talk to people rather than preach from an ivory tower.  Carol even managed to gracefully tell Abe to his face about how wrong his article on Madison Avenue (slightly shaming Peggy in public) in the Village Voice was and that he may boast about working on  the Kennedy Campaign and the Freedom Rides but he has not really took the time to truly listen. Abe was flummoxed.“I don’t know what you see in this square but she is a keeper.”Several of Joyce’s friends and some family members got to meet Carol and were enchanted by her….even Joyce’s very conservative parents, with Mrs. Ramsay finding Carol to be a perfect lady. “I actually wished you would have been like her back then but I can settle for her being a semi-daughter in law.” Before meeting Joyce’s parents, Joyce introduced Carol to a now-married Stan and Peggy (the latter pregnant with twins on her 32nd birthday) with some awkwardness of running into Carol’s old roommate: Joan Harris nee Holloway. She was impressed that Carol and Joan handled it all with poise and even embraced each other in a way that implied something more than burying a hatchet. If there was any contempt the party guests may have had for how open Carol and Joyce were in their relationship, it was not expressed: Carol and Joyce got on swimmingly with Stan’s family and Peggy’s sister and brother-in-law. Joyce and Stan even tossed a few balls around with Ken Cosgrove and Stan’s uncle with the kids while Carol lent her chain so Joan and Anita Respola (nee Olson) can test for Peggy’s babies’ genders. The rest of the 1970s were an exciting time: there was a sense that Joyce and Carol would be open about their relationship in public and their own social circles, Carol was able to disclose the nature of her sexuality and relationship at work without losing her job, Joyce had quite a time photographing coverage of the San Francisco political scene, they had quite a time at the Houston convention in ’77, it was an optimistic time for them.The 1980s presented a challenge for them in their personal lives. The AIDS epidemic was taking away the lives and livelihoods of some friends of theirs’, Carol worried about her students’ day in and day out, Joyce’s photography grew grim as the news had gotten darker, Joyce even received news that her gay friends from back in the day had died from the disease. There were a few bright lights: Carol was promoted from advisor to head editor at the college literature magazine she worked at, Joyce’s photography covering the AIDS Quilts in D.C. and the San Francisco-Oakland ’89 quake, the young children in their families were graduating from school and starting families, they had the Rizzo kids over in the summer of ’84 and took them to Disneyland, “I feel the Nineties are going to look great Joyce” confided Carol to Joyce.1994 was not a good year for the two of them. Oh they had their successes: Carol was able to retire with tenure from the university, Joyce was even more of a success with her photographs and supervised all the sectors of department, Democrats were back in office, the decade started off great. But it was New Year’s Day, at midnight, when Carol started feeling a bit odd. First they chalked it up to eating and drinking a little too much, then the headaches have gotten worse, but Carol insisted that the Rizzos’ and Joan with her new husband and Michael with his wife and all their kids come west for Easter. “Are you really sure you want to do this Carol? You have been feeling like crap these last few months, you have needed to sit down more since last May.” “It will be fine Joyce, I’m sure us being with our dear friends is all the cure I need. Plus I have felt cooped up inside our apartment.” It was their walking excursion in Russian Hill that was the nail lost from the horse’s shoe: Carol had tripped while they were climbing down and fell hitting her head. She was knocked unconscious there, Joyce held her head on the lap, gently tousling her hair in the ambulance while Michael sat with her, ready to fight with any authority figures at the hospital. “Screw you and your fakata rules! My friend needs to be with the love of her life and you are making it very difficult! If you are getting through to them, you are going through me and I have been institutionalized and I am not afraid of going back there again!” Carol had some treatments done, including an MRI where they found out the bad news: she had a large tumor the size of an orange in her brain….she had Stage 3 Cancer….she was going to die sooner than the two of them ever anticipated.It was time to prepare: all their friends and family came to say their good-byes, to spend time with Carol before she left. Joyce worked hard to pamper and take care of all the things her vibrant and beautiful partner would have taken care of herself. Joan requested some time alone to talk with Carol at the hospital; Joyce didn’t hear much of it, but it felt like they opened their souls to one another and have truly made peace with one another. Joan left the room so Carol and start to nap and, to Joyce’s surprise, the cool and poised (still after all these years) redhead gave Joyce a tight hug. “Thank you for making her happy, you don’t know what it means to me,” she told Joyce.Carol McCardy died December 24th, 1994 surrounded by Joyce and their dear friends, some including some old students she advised. Rather than a burial plot: Carol had decided to donate most of her organs, have the rest of her body cremated, and have a plaque at her favorite shady spot at the Berkley campus where she worked. Joyce decided to move back to Manhattan, where she and Carol both started their respective youths, with her ashes in tow. She had gotten back to wearing bright colors but she was in essence mourning, she was glad to have her friends surrounding her: Peggy and Abe buried the hatched together for her sake and took her out to her favorite spots on the beach with their respective partners, where they (even Peggy) lost all self-control and got themselves wet and sandy. Joan managed to give a pleasant surprise to Joyce: she managed to convince the new owners of their old apartment to allow them to tour the place. It was there Joan talked about what the apartment was like when she and Carol last lived there, about the process it took to add their own touches of beauty and coziness to it all, and even pointed out the still-coral color of the walls to Joyce as something Carol chose that set off both their respective colorings. She talked about what a neat and considerate roommate Carol was and how she, in the nick of time, managed to save Joan from having to pinch pennies on her hairdos and tailoring by applying herself and her parents’ money to the apartment. She even gifted Joyce something odd but pretty: the curtains that Carol left in the apartment, in varying shades of seafoam and turquoise with those faint 1950s geometric patterns on the silk-like fabric. “It’s not much, but I wanted you to have something of her own.” Joyce took down the Venetian Blinds already installed in her apartment and put up those curtains: it started looking like home again.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“Girl, you really got me goin'
You got me so I don't know what I'm doin' now
Yeah, you really got me now
You got me so I can't sleep at night” The Kinks (You Really Got Me) “It’s finally nice to meet you in person after we have been staring at one another?” What a stupid thing to say. But the young woman didn’t seem to mind, she actually beamed a large smile at Joyce, complete with exposed pearly white teeth. “Oh I hope I wasn’t too intrusive Ma’am,” replied the woman introduced as Rebecca Gillies. “I hope I am not too forward in introducing myself, my name is Rebecca Gillies, friends and acquaintances call me Becky,” the young brunette held her hand out, which Joyce took. “Joyce Ramsay and how are you acquainted with Bridget?” Joyce took a seat. “I work as an assistant for her fiancée and legal advisor, Mark Darcy,” Becky motioned to the handsome yet reticent Brit in the suit who was engaged in a conversation with Peggy and blushed when Stan clapped a large palm on his back and exclaimed “Atta boy!” as Bridget giggled. Joyce grinned, “But why are you on a trip with your boss and his fiancée?” and Becky blushed “It’s a long story; I shan’t bore you with all the details.” Joyce looked about the crowded and popular restaurant, “Looks like we have all the time in the world.” Joyce weathered through a lot of bombshells in her life: the Rosenberg’s execution, the virulent controversy against Ingrid Bergman, Marilyn Monroe the celebrity, the Confidential magazine libel scandals, her parents’ rejection of her “lifestyle”, both the Cuban Missile Crisis and the Kennedy assassinations, the election of Richard Nixon, Peggy and Abe hooking up, Peggy and Abe breaking up, that she developed a friendship with Stan Rizzo, Megan becoming a very successful acting coach and casting director, Stan and Peggys’ whirlwind courtship that turned into a lasting marriage, the AIDs outbreak, the failure of the ERA ratification, the audacity of the group ACT UP, and now everything that a proper and modest young woman named Becky had told her about her crush on Bridget and her deep friendship with Mark Darcy. It wasn’t a shock that Becky had a crush on the heterosexual beauty, “Darling, you aren’t the first, nor the last Sapphic Sister to have barked up the wrong tree,” said Joyce as she sipped her vanilla egg cream (dessert before lunch) and Becky smiled shyly at that, a bit relieved to let it all out, and she took a large gulp of her egg cream (chocolate at Peggy’s suggestion).  “Hasn’t it tortured you to be that close to them across this country?” Joyce sympathetically asked, to which Becky answered, in a manner that made the older woman laugh: “At Yellowstone, Old Faithful’s sulfur managed to put a damper on their nightly passion.” She listened to Becky recount her hopes and dreams for her future: aside from finding love, she wants to be able to move up in the legal world and away from her very conservative environment that reminded Joyce of the complaints that Joan and Peggy voiced to her about their old workplaces: filled with catty women and men who are out to cut an ambitious woman down in her worth and reduce her to an ornamental piece and nothing more. “And I hope I get to at least be a partner at a firm, or rather, a firm that I would establish,” stated Becky. “I remember when SCDP agency started,” Peggy cut in “it was an adventure. We took back our supplies from the office, called our accounts, rounded up talent, got a few secretaries from the absorbed agency in, and we had to set up camp in a hotel suite for a while before finding a place at the Time & Life building….but maybe you will have a much easier employer than Don Draper was, God bless him.” Becky soon talked about her family, something that really defrosted some cynicism for Joyce: she was glad the young woman had a large, loving, and accepting family that didn’t encourage her to repress her true self or change their children to be “upstanding”. She remembered many of the parents in Rye always wanted their sons to be athletic, daughters to be pristine, fat children to slim down, daughters to not ruin the perfect noses that their mothers passed down to them…but the Gillies family seemed to accept their children whether they were overweight and loud, a lesbian who dated a bit prematurely (Joyce found it odd when Bridget let slip that Becky once dated her own professor), a transgender daughter who named herself after Esther Williams (what a woman), and a pair of as different as night and day. She peered over at the other adults at the table and noticed they seemed to have wanted parents like Becky’s growing up (she has no way of criticizing British parenting, Stan’s mother left his life and his father was a no-show, and Peggy’s mother was a very smothering and critical Catholic). Bridget, in particular, looked misty and almost started to cry looking at Mark after making a disgusted one-word comment: “Eton”, Joyce held the young blonde’s hand; Becky spotted her and looked on with pride. Finally the food arrived: corned beef and a black & white cookie for Peggy, pastrami hot sandwich and sweet potato knish for Bridget, hot dog and potato salad for Mark, potato knish with brisket hot sandwich for Stan, matzo ball soup for Joyce, and potato latkes with applesauce for Becky. Joyce, in between bites, watched the young Australian-Brit munch happily into a piece of classic New York Yiddish delicacy and marveled at how complex this young woman truly was…and just how she already felt her life altered by her.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“It used to be fun was in 
The capture and kill 
In another place and time 
I did it all for thrillsLove me and I'll leave you 
I told you at the start 
I had no idea that you 
Would tear my world apartAnd you're the one to blame 
I used to know my name 
But I've lost control of the game 
Cause even though I set the rules 
You've got me acting like a fool 
When I see you I lose my cool.
Lust to love was the last thing I was dreaming of.” Lust to Love (The Go Go’s)

“Megan, I think I am in love, this girl is stunning and sweet and she has such an amazing life for a woman as young as she.”“Wow. No ‘Hello Megan, how are you doing?’ or ‘Hey Megan, I just want to talk’,” playfully scolded the French-Canadian in Los Angeles. After failing her marriage to Don Draper and failing her acting career, Megan took some jobs as a background dancer and worked her way up to choreographer for film and music videos.“Right, I’m so sorry. Just this woman….I can’t get her out of my head.”“Alright start at the beginning.”Almost an hour into that lunch date, Rebecca’s cousin and her cousin’s boyfriend met up with them (a very extroverted and wild-dressed version of Becky and a boisterous and chubby guy) and started loudly proclaiming Joyce as a future in-law and started making arrangements for Becky and her to join them for couples’ vacations. Becky blushed at all this and Joyce gave her a smile, then all the sudden Mark (to the obvious surprise of Bridget and Becky) started requesting that everyone trade their contact information with one another (he winked at Bridget and the Rizzos), to which Stan started writing his information and encouraged Joyce to do the same: “C’mon Joyce, you know you want it….maybe you can screw Petula Clark like you wanted” to which Joyce playfully elbowed him. Joyce spotted Bridget and Peggy smirking as they passed their information and Peggy touchingly telling Bridget “You know she loves you, she has a really hard time telling you and giving you what you need. It’s tough, but I know from experience that parents often need to be forgiven by their kids.” Bridget just smiled with a bit of tears and gently touched Peggy’s arm. “Here is my phone number, email, and home address,” said Joyce to Becky “feel free to talk to me, anytime.”Megan had listened, enraptured by what her friend told her: “So has she told you anything?”Joyce took a deep breath and said: “Yes she has, she and I had really opened up.”Becky told her a lot about her upbringing, her crush on Bridget, what it was like to work for a conservative firm as a lesbian, and about how hard the dating scene was. “I just want to find the right woman,” replied Becky, biting back her tears, “that isn’t too much to ask, is it?” Joyce, in turn, told her about her career and about her past dating life, and over some phone calls and emails…she dug deep into her long relationship with Carol. “I still miss her, I think you would have liked her, and she would have liked you. You two even had the same taste in clothing: feminine but practical. Not particularly trendy but classic and comfortable without looking slovenly.” Joyce teared up a little talking about Carol to Becky, but it didn’t hurt as much as before, she actually felt a warm sensation run through her.Mark Darcy actually called in with a bombshell: “Ms. Ramsay, I have a proposition for you. I’d like to invite you to my wedding with Bridget. I believe Miss Gillies would be very happy to see you.”Meanwhile: it turned out that Bridget and Mark conspired with Peggy and Stan to play matchmaker their single friends. “This is so brilliant, and perhaps I could have them over my flat with Becky’s friends,” said Bridget. “Bridget meant her apartment,” said Mark, hoping that the Americans couldn't have any “flat” and “curvy” puns. “Thanks Mark, me and Peggy know,” snarked Stan. “Remember one of our agency’s partners, Lane Pryce, was British,” replied Peggy.Joyce had called Becky right after that call from Mark: “So, your boss invited me to his wedding and set me up as your plus-one, and I accepted.” Becky was excited to hear the news and told her she was happy to not come alone or with some awkwardly assigned a plus-one who would be some swarmy man or a wallflower.“So you are going across the Atlantic Ocean to meet up with a girl who is too young to be your daughter, and be her companion to a wedding? A wedding of two people you barely know that well?” asked Megan. Joyce could picture Megan: she was still beautiful but the combination of age, sun, and years of smoking took a toll on Megan’s face, she was now wrinkly and her face was much thinner than it should be. The amazement and skepticism that Megan was expressing would emphasize those lines and wrinkles.“You know what? I actually am.”

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“Gimme a ticket for an aeroplane 
Ain't got time to take a fast train 
Lonely days are gone, I'm a-goin' home 
My baby, just-a wrote me a letterI don't care how much money I gotta spend 
Got to get back to my baby again 
Lonely days are gone, I'm a-goin' home 
My baby, just-a wrote me a letter
Well, she wrote me a letter 
Said she couldn't live without me no more 
Listen mister, can't you see I got to get back 
To my baby once-a more 
Anyway, yeah!” The Box Tops (The Letter)“Hey Julio, I’m going to need a ticket to London, England for about a month.” Joyce was at a travel agency where she had the assistance of a forty-something year old Puerto Rican-American man named Julio. He appeared as though he was a sweet-faced boy as a child, but now hardened and aged up throughout the years and very heavy. “You know your plans are about 2 months away, right?” he asked. Julio wondered what the rush was….oh….it was that girl Miss Olson (he still called Peggy that even after having gotten married, having her permission to call her by her first name, and starting a home with her lovechild) told him that she and her husband set Joyce up with. It seemed a bit fast but it was not like she was moving her kid to Newark. “You want first-class Joyce? You can have me and Keith’s frequent flyer miles.” Joyce smiled, “That’s ok. I would be willing to ride cargo for this girl.” Julio’s eyes opened wide, it was that serious. “I got you a good seat then on Delta. Remember to get your converter plugs, everything is so weird there.”She arrived at the Heathrow Airport and looked around at people: families reuniting, romantic partners embracing, lonely people sleeping holding signs, and looked for a sign of a tall, pale, thin girl with long brown hair but couldn’t find her. Joyce sighed, “Am I making a mistake, to get involved so fast?” She then spotted a few women: This short, round-faced blonde in a thigh length coat and heeled boots, followed by a taller and slimmer woman with curly blonde hair and a petite and (Joyce was not proud of this) neurotic and comparatively plain woman with short dark hair. The party continued with a mild looking redheaded woman who was in danger of blending in with the walls, a gorgeous black gal whose style would give Megan a run for her money, a very tall and broad woman with a light brown braid affixed to her head, and finally a tall and thin woman with a low ponytail and large sunglasses. The party approached: Joyce saw that the short blonde with the round face was Bridget and the woman with the large sunglasses was “Rebecca!” yelped Joyce. The tall woman opened her mouth wide and looked as delighted as a child at Coney Island: “Joyce!” They rushed towards one another and hugged one another, to some of the shocks and some delights of passerby’s at the airport. After a few moments, they both relaxed, Becky took a step back with the other women and started making introductions. “Joyce, you’ve met Bridget. These ladies are good friends of me and Bridget.” Motioning towards the Black girl with the very French sense of style, “This is Brigitte”, Joyce remembered her as being mentioned as one of Becky’s ex-girlfriends. To the broad-shouldered girl, she was the ballerina “My good friend Olga”, against her better judgement and memory of Becky’s conversations with her she was surprised that such a large, masculine girl would be a ballerina. Bridget smiled and motioned to the other three women: To the redhead, “This is my friend Magda, from my days at Uni” and to the blonde “Shazzer, she is the journalist for whom her favorite word is ‘fuck’”, and finally the small, plain brunette was Jude (Joyce snickered, Bridget mentioned Jude crying in the restroom over her boyfriend Richard…imagine what Joan would say to that!). Joyce shook hands, glad to see them all, even Magda and Jude. “We need to get a fuckin’ move on! Kali is coming round with her ride!” exclaimed Shazzer. They went outside, with Joyce’s carry-on and checked-in bag in tow by Bridget and Olga, and met a car outside where a very eye-catching, gorgeous, hip Indian woman came out of the passenger’s…no the driver’s seat. “Kali, this is Joyce,” said Becky “Joyce, Kali”. Joyce and Kali shook hands and Kali took a hard look at Joyce’s eyes and then she smiled directly at Becky. “She passes,” is what the look seemed to have read to Joyce. “Well let’s not keep your girlfriend waiting Rebecca, she needs some rest and some good take-away,” directed Kali, who then turned to Joyce “do you like Greek, Pizza, Thai, Chinese, or Indian?”They all deposited at Becky’s apartment where Becky and Joyce took their time climbing the stairs while the rest of the women started placing things in the flat. Joyce took a look around at the apartment: it was small, with a restroom, bedroom, living room connected to the kitchen and dining room, and a storage closet. The colors of the walls were all cool shades that made the small living room look breezy yet cozy, there was a comfy and large three-seater sofa in a very soft and plush deep pink color, an old Baughman grey patterned love seat, some large floor pillows in one corner with a large plant in another, a rounded lavender chair, with a 1950s coffee table with a paint splatter design in the middle with a chunky black Tv standing on a wooden table. Separating the living room and dining room is a yarn rug with a swan. The kitchen was painted a warm orange with forest-like and earthy accents and a refrigerator that was the most recent purchase; the dining room had the same hard wood floor as the rest of the apartment and had a Burl Wood double pedestal dining table (covered by a coral orange damask cloth with a small turquoise porcelain vase holding yellow roses) with a couple of curved carpet-like teal dining chairs, four beige curved leather chairs with steel legs and support, added to the eclectic appeal of the apartment. Joyce even saw that the door facing the private quarters was painted a ballerina-like pink with a coat rack and steel container for umbrellas.“You have an amazing apartment Becky. But where will you sleep?” Becky smiled and answered that she would sleep on the sofa in the meantime, with the rest of the women trying to suppress their snickers. Joyce retired to bed for a few hours and woke up to the women, plus more company, setting up plates for the gyros and the Greek crisps (which look like French fries covered by tzatziki sauce and feta cheese) and the hummus with pita breads and the calamari. She saw Mark with a very pompous seeming man around his age on the possessive arm of Magda, a handsome young man who looked a lot like Tony Perkins, two younger men preparing a salad with olives and feta cheese, and a middle-aged couple where the woman looked slightly like Becky albeit short and chubby with lustrous colored raven hair. “Joyce, this is my Aunt Charlotte and Uncle Peter, Aunt and Uncle this is my girlfriend,” Becky sputtered that last word out, afraid that Joyce would run off like a frightened fawn to the airport or boat to the States.  The plump woman smiled, she was as pretty as Becky, Joyce thrilled to wonder how Becky’s mother would look “Pleasure,” Charlotte said, holding her hand out which Joyce took. The man, a very scrawny and homely redhead with a very swellegant sense of style, also took Joyce’s hand and smiled broadly. Magda came in with the pompous man “Ms. Ramsay, I’d like you to meet my husband Jeremy. He works with Mark in Chambers and please meet our lovely children.” Joyce shook hands with every little member (she lost count of how many children there were and swore that Magda turned one corner and popped out another). Thankfully Becky came in and introduced Joyce to the men who had showed up. “Joyce this is Bridget’s friend Tom” Joyce took his hand “Are you that guy who sang that song?” “Yes I am! All those years ago!” the two young men (one black, the other of Latin descent) “This is Chiwetel, whom I befriended from the firm, and Fernando, he is training to be a chef. Fernando, Chiwetel, this is my girlfriend Joyce.” As Joyce shook their hands, she saw that Fernando was about a couple inches taller than her own self and thick-built with a natural tan and dimples and Chiwetel was a conservative looking man who didn’t repress his natural hair texture, she wondered what it was like working at that firm and was thankful he and Becky had one another there.Everyone sat down to dinner, it went smoothly aside from Jeremy and Magda making ignorant (Jeremy) and patronizing (Magda) comments to Becky, Joyce, Chiwetel, Olga, Fernando, and Kali about their races and sexualities and expressions. Kali later whispered something to Becky’s ear that made her giggle and Kali smiled widely at Shazzer when she told Jeremy to shut the fuck up and for Magda to get out of her fucking ivory cage and experience the real world. After everyone mostly left, Bridget and Mark stayed behind to apologize to Becky and Joyce for their married friends’ ignorant comments, the latter couple invited them for some coffee a la Ramsay.Later that night, when they are preparing to retire to bed, Joyce asked Becky what Kali said in her ear. “She said that she just tied Magda’s fallopian tubes from her seat without touching her. I forgot to tell you that she is psychic.” Joyce smiled and touched Becky’s hand, and led her to the bedroom Becky lent her and shut the door.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“People they rush everywhere
Each with their own secret care So ferry 'cross the Mersey
And always take me there
The place I love
People around every corner
They seem to smile and say
We don't care what your name is boy
We'll never turn you away
So I'll continue to say
Here I always will stay
So ferry 'cross the Mersey'
Cause this land's the place I love
And here I'll stay
And here I'll stay
Here I'll stay.” Gerry & the Pacemakers or Frankie Goes To Hollywood (Ferry Cross the Mersey)“Now here is the first dance between Mark and Bridget Darcy!” Becky and Joyce were sitting on the groom’s side of the church on that wedding day: Becky was wearing a shocking pink dress with a V-neck, a see-through butterfly-ish shrug attached in the same color, and a fit cut on the bias that reaches the tops of her knees. Becky altered it with a cummerbund belt a friend (her ex, Chloe) lent her, in a light Royal Blue with violet-colored 4-inch stiletto heels and a matching pearl set with studs, bracelet, and a choker. Joyce was surprised that all the eyes were set on the bride what with this beautiful and lively woman, who was tearing up a bit. Joyce held her: “You are okay, you’re doing okay, and I know you are happy for them. I’m here for you.” A teary-eyed Becky turned to her and smiled “I’m so happy I have met you. I don’t want you to leave.” “You can come and visit, wow is this really Mark’s pick?” Becky smiled, “Yes, I provided some music for him to dance to with Bridget and I had Mr. Rizzo’s help.” Joyce chuckled at Stan, who is just a few years older than her, and yet he was more “with it” with music than Mark. The song in question? “Don’t Change” by INXS was pumping as Bridget and Mark waltzed in the room, “Shall we join them?” asked Becky to Joyce. Joyce was stunned that Becky was ready to dance with her. “Yes Becky, let’s show them a few moves or two.” They joined the dance floor to the smiles, gasps, and stern looks from others (the latter two garnering a few death glares from Bridget and Mark). Joyce caught a look from Mark and she smiled at him, he smiled back, they were the luckiest on this floor, dancing with these vibrant, witty, beautiful women. They both caught this perverted man (Geoffrey Alconbury, Joyce cannot fathom what Bridget’s parents were doing allowing him to be around her) creeping up, Bridget and Shazzer both grabbed their stiletto heels and he backed up….all the way to the parking lot. Joyce took a nice look at Bridget: that sweetheart neckline really showed off her ivory, soft, tiny-pored cleavage which was so plump and her hourglass figure was emphasized by how the white dress’s waist and long full skirt and silk material made it look even more hourglass-y….Becky called her attention and playfully gave her a smack…and led her outside.
April, 2008
“Joyce, I have a question for you: I am moving to New York City, I have accepted a partnership with Abbott & Abbott there, and I was hoping instead of looking for an apartment if I could move in with you.” Joyce nearly dropped her lunch, hearing this on the phone. “That’s fantastic Becky, when are you coming? You can move in with me, and don’t worry; we can work on moving everything you want from your apartment slowly.” “I cannot wait Joyce, I’m so nervous about everything. The flight, the change, will I adjust to America?” “You’re so smart and observant, you will adjust to everything, everyone I have known, including myself had dealt with so much changes in our lives and we’re still here. It will be fine; you can feel free to bring a friend or a couple of them with you, ok?” In a corner, Peggy and Stan were close by snickering “We have done it!”Joyce waited at Kennedy airport, looking for a tall woman with a spare figure and long brown hair. Becky showed up, followed by her friends Olga and Chiwetel (both were holding hands, Joyce figured Becky was delighted about this, she told her Olga had a thing for him). Joyce opened her arms wide and hugged Becky “I’m so happy you are finally here”. Joyce brought the three of them to her apartment where she started making some orders for Ramen (Becky and Chiwetel), Chinese (Olga), and Ethiopian (Joyce) while the three younger people rested and had their drinks. Becky, making herself at home, put the movie Rear Window on the DVD player and motioned for Joyce to come sit down next to her. It was nice, just having friends over and being together….gosh Becky was so warm and sweet.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“This old heart of mine been broke a thousand times Each time you break away, I fear you've gone to stay Lonely nights that come, memories that flow, bringing you back again Hurting me more and moreMaybe it's my mistake to show this love I feel inside 'Cause each day that passes by you got me Never knowing if I'm coming or going, but I, I love you This old heart darling, is weak for you I love you, yes, I do These old arms of mine miss having you around Makes these tears inside start a-falling down.” The Isley Brothers (This Old Heart of Mine)  “Instead of a table, can we get a small room? We have company over in town.”There are a lot of visitors coming in from in town and out of town, for brunch. It was a good two years since Becky moved to New York City and established a career there: impressing and moving up through the ranks of Abbott & Abbott. Joyce marveled at the changes that took place in those last few years: the country elected an African-American man to the Presidency, Bridget and Mark had a little boy, Chiwetel and Olga had gotten married last Fall, Joyce’s family (or whomever is left alive or the younger generations) had gotten closer to her than before, Peggy and Stan congratulated themselves on several more grandchildren and frequent flier miles, Bridget’s friend Tom and Becky’s friend Fernando are currently dating, the Supreme Court legalized same-sex marriage, Becky’s parents have really absorbed Joyce into their family, they had Becky’s younger sister Patricia (“Fat Amy”, insisted the teen) over before she started school at Barden University, and now they had most of their loved ones over in town (coincidentally at that) and all have met for brunch. The young Darcy boy has gotten cozy with Joyce (she spoils him with sweets); “I can has cookie?” she would have answered yes if Becky (tattletale) wasn’t there to sternly intervene, she whispered that Auntie Joyce will take him to Coney Island and ride all the rides and get very wet. Becky was bussing her parents to sit down, the younger woman has been acting a bit skittish lately and looked at the table at the Darcy family, her parents, Joyce’s nieces and nephews, Ginsberg, Rizzos, Patricia, Kali, Kali’s friends from Indiana, Joan and her son Kevin.“So you were a good friend of my late niece Barbara?” “Yeah, I really miss her; she was a good friend of mine.”“Dustin, you cannot hold your liquor.”“Old Man Rizzo, YOU cannot hold your liquor.”“Jane, Max, this is Peggy Rizzo and Sally Draper.”Becky made a loud cough: “Could I have your attention please?” and everyone turned around with Mrs. Gillies having the look of a child at her birthday party during gift-unwrapping time.“It has been providential that we have you all together, despite distance and time differences, it has been of the utmost importance that we remain close to one another and a privilege to have everyone over to hear this life changing news I have for you all. Now you know that, yesterday, the highest judicial court has made the institution of marriage more inclusive to all couples in love, this institution is no longer exclusive to heterosexual couples looking to keep up appearances and make business mergers.” Bridget smiled at the latter part, and turned to smile at Peggy, who turned to Kali, who turned to Nancy Wheeler, to Jane, to Max, and to Joan, who then smiled at Proud Mama Gillies. “I have this to say,” Becky turned to Joyce.“Joyce Ramsay, will you marry me?”Joyce was going to burst, but composed herself “Yes, I will.”Stan and Mark exchanged enthusiastic and triumphant smirks right there.That night, after all the congratulations and the demands to be given roles in the wedding by their loved ones, Joyce and Becky headed home to their apartment and snuggled in front of the TV where they exchanged cuddles and kisses. Joyce decided to sing a song she heard the kids singing: “All I want to get is a little bit closer…all I want to know is…can you come a little closer…” Becky gamely acquiesced to these requests, snuggling up like a koala bear. After these long lonely years, Joyce truly felt at home and knew how weak her heart was regarding the young woman. It was only home when she was around.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“It’s a perfect beginning.” Dowager Empress Marie (Anastasia)
Becky had to call Joyce right away from work: “Joyce, this is Becky. I have the momentous news, we can get married now! It is legalized in the state of New York!” Becky stood stunned: after several decades of fighting, surviving, and trying to adapt to a society that was resistant to accepting people as they are….finally people were more free to love who they loved and for that love to be legally recognized and helpful for tax benefits. “I’m going to call Peggy and Michael and Megan…..no I will call Joan first,” decided Joyce to Becky on the phone. “Alright, I am going to call my Mum and Dad to make sure they are coming straight over for brunch as planned,” stated Becky “I will call the restaurant and make sure our tables are reserved.” But (as Joyce would know her) Becky’s first call was truly to Mark Darcy.“Mark Darcy is speaking” “Mark its Rebecca, have you received the news? New York State finally legalized same-sex marriage!” Mark turned to Bridget (holding their sleeping child) and mouthed the news and Bridget’s eyes went wide. Mark had to repress his enthusiasm and surprise some “Rebecca I wanted to ask, are you considering on proposing to her? Are you going to propose with a ring? I had proposed to Bridget without one but she insisted it’d be set up all romantically.” “I’ve something better in mind Mark, I want most of our friends and family together for brunch for the proposal, it’s very providential that everyone is in town and available.” “Very providential,” he agreed.“Peggy! Stan! It’s legalized!” “Whoa, settle down Joyce. At your age, you cannot afford to get too excited.” “Pegasus, I am not going to get down on my knees for sure. I don’t want to bust a cap.” Stan rolled over in the sofa, “I told you, you should have gotten surgery to replace them. If it ain’t broke, fix them before they do.” “Rizzo, I am not getting unnecessary surgery, would put me out of commission.” “Not my fault you have a young girlfriend.” “If you were in my place, you’d want it.” Peggy rolled her eyes, “Anyhow, I know that the kids won’t be able to make it then, but for the wedding I’ll drag them by the ears.” She perked up more: “Let me call Joan, she deserves to hear the good news.”At the end of the day, Becky and Joyce retired to their bed. Joyce grabbed her by the hips and Becky giggled about her grip, “Such a strong grip, not much to hang onto”. “How sad,” deadpanned Joyce “I will need to kiss your bee stung lips.” Joyce started kissing Becky, who got really into it. “Slow down at your age, you need to be careful,” playfully scolded Becky. “How can I help it? I have a sexy girlfriend, a long aging institution is now legally opening up to save its bourgeois ass, and we will get the chance to be buried together one day.” “Or have our ashes mixed together with Carol’s” remarked Becky “We don’t want to take up space in the Earth.” “Your Priest approves?” “Not a good time to bring up my Priest.” “It’s a progressive church, Joyce.” Joyce rolled over and turned on the TV. “Look your favorite movie,” Joyce motioned smiling to a televised screening of Muriel’s Wedding, “Ooohhh you know I love this movie and I don’t care what anyone says, I believe Muriel and Rhonda ended up living their lives together.” Joyce smiled, she really loved watching Aussie Cinema with her, learning the cultural cues in the films, the slang, and loved having such an intelligent and sweet woman as her girlfriend. “My my, at Waterloo Napoleon did surrender….” She sang before being lulled to sleep.As Joyce dozed beside her, Becky was figuring out her next move: should she hit a jewelry store or wait until she proposed and got the desired answer to the question she will pop to Joyce? “There was something in the air that night, the stars were bright Fernando. They were shining there for you and me Joyce…”

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“Our dreams have magic because we'll always stay in love this way Our day will come (our day will come, our day will come)” Ruby & The Romantics and covered by kd lang and Amy Winehouse and possibly more artists (Our Day Will Come)

July 2011
TO: [email protected]FROM: [email protected]HEY MARK, THIS IS STAN. I REMEMBER THAT BRIDGET ONCE MENTIONED TO ME HOW YOU DID WATERCOLOR PAINTINGS SINCE YOU WERE A KID; WELL I WAS THINKING THAT WITH YOUR WATERCOLOR TALENTS AND MY SKETCHING AND PHOTOGRAPHY SKILLS, WE COULD DESIGN WEDDING INVITATIONS FOR JOYCE AND BECKY. WHAT DO YOU SAY?STAN TO: [email protected]FROM: [email protected]HELLO MR. RIZZO, I HOPE YOUR EVENING FINDS YOU AND MS. RIZZO WELL. IT SOUNDS VERY INTRIGUING BUT I WONDER HOW I WOULD BE ABLE TO CONTRIBUTE WITH MY WORKLOAD AND THE FAMILY.YOURS TRULY,MARK DARCY, ESQ. TO: [email protected]FROM: [email protected]STAN HERE, I TALKED TO BRIDGET AND SHE FIGURED YOU’D SAY THAT. I KNOW YOU HAVE SOME SPARE TIME AND CAN AFFORD TO CUT A FEW HOURS OFF YOUR DAY. I CAN SKETCH OUT SOME DESIGNS AND YOU CAN DO SOMETHING WITH THEM AND SCAN THEM BEFORE EMAILING IT TO ME. THERE’S MORE TO LIFE THAN WORK.STANP.S. YOU HAVE MY PERMISSION, NAY MY COMMAND, TO CALL ME STAN.
August 2011
TO: [email protected]FROM: [email protected]HI BRIDGE, THIS IS PEGGY; BLUE SOUP WAS DELICIOUS WITH THE FRIED CHICKEN JOAN BROUGHT TO THE POTLUCK EVEN WITH SALLY’S WAFFLES. I WAS THINKING YOU AND I CAN UTILIZE OUR WRITING TALENTS FOR THE INVITATIONS, I SEE YOU WRITING IN THAT DIARY A LOT AND I KNOW YOU ARE A WIT. YOU AND I CAN EXCHANGE IDEAS UNTIL WE COME UP WITH SOMETHING PERFECT, AND I WILL SHARE THEM WITH STAN FOR WHEN HE MAKES THE FINAL PRODUCT FOR THE WEDDING INVITES.ARE YOU IN?YOURS IN POWER,PEGGY TO: [email protected]FROM: [email protected]HELLO PEGGY, THIS ACTUALLY SOUNDS THRILLING. I ADMIT TO FEELING A BIT INTIMIDATED THAT YOU WOULDN’T FIND ME CLEVER ENOUGH FOR SUCH A TASK. I DO CARE ENOUGH ABOUT BECKY’S HAPPINESS; I DO OWE HER FOR HOW EVERYTHING WORKED OUT BETWEEN ME AND MARK.BRIDGETP.S. I AM GLAD YOU ENJOYED THAT BLUE SOUP RECIPE I HAVE SENT YOU. TO: [email protected]FROM: [email protected]BRIDGET: YOU ARE AMAZING AND HONESTLY I AM EVEN MORE ANGRY AT THIS WORLD FOR MAKING YOU FEEL LESS THAN WHAT YOU ARE. WE WILL BE DISCUSSING DRAFTS TOGETHER AND THERE WILL BE MONTHS OF PREPARATION FOR THE WEDDING. WE JUST HAVE TO SEND INVITATIONS OUT ON NOVEMBER. I’M GLAD YOU FEEL THAT WAY ABOUT BECKY, I HAVE SEEN JOYCE THROUGHOUT THE YEARS, THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I HAVE SEEN HER HAPPY SINCE CAROL.PEGGYP.S. JOAN AND SALLY SEND THEIR REGARDS, APPARENTLY THE BLUE SOUP HELPS AS GRAVY FOR THE CHICKEN AND WAFFLES.
September 2011
 “Joan Holloway Harris speaking,” replied Joan as she picked up the receiver after taking off her gold earring. It was a bright, crisp September mid-morning that day and she was looking forward to resting and watching old episodes of Keeping up Appearances on her DVD.“Kali here, I was wondering if you had any plans for our dear friends’ wedding,” explained the younger woman from across the ocean where she was laying down and nibbling on some toast spread with butter and jam.“Well I was thinking of helping to organize the cooking and places settings,” Joan thought out loud “but I also wanted to help Joyce and Becky, okay really Becky, with their hair and makeup. But I would be swamped.” Joan looked about helplessly, there was a lot she wanted to do like go out and visit her son and grandkids.“If you’d like,” Kali asked “I could take care of the cosmetics and coiffures while you make dinner look beautiful. Becky and I enjoy a great back and forth about beauty.” Kali then opens up a book containing photographs of old movie stars, looking for inspiration.“You would do that? That is so wonderful. I just really want to do a lot for Joyce.”“Joan, if I may, can I ask you about your attachment to Joyce?”“How long do you have?”“I’m not doing anything today, aside from cooking food in the crockpot and oven, the telly is so boring today; nothing interesting on. Do tell away.”“Well it all started when I was in college…”
October 2011
TO: [email protected]FROM: [email protected]HEY TOM, THIS IS MICHAEL. I WONDER IF YOU GOT THIS FAKAKTA COMPUTER LETTER IN, I CANNOT WORK THIS INFERNAL MACHINE WELL, REMEMBER A LARGER VERSION OF THIS SENT ME TO THE NUT HOUSE! I WAS WONDERING HOW WE COULD HELP OUR DEAR FRIENDS (NEVER IN MY DREAMS DID I THINK JOYCE WOULD SHACK UP WITH A CHILD) FOR THEIR WEDDING. STAN TOLD ME THAT YOU USED TO BE A SINGER BACK IN THE DAY (I STILL GET A RIBBING FROM STAN FROM NOT KNOWING YOUNG PEOPLE MUSIC). I WAS THINKING OF GETTING YOU AND BABY BECKY’S EX GIRLFRIEND BRIGITTE TO SING AT THE WEDDING, ESPECIALLY AT THE RECEPTION. I THINK I COULD WATCH THE KIDS, UNLESS YOU THINK DIET REDHEAD AND THAT GOY MARK IS FRIENDS WITH WOULD OBJECT.MICHAEL TO: [email protected]FROM: [email protected]DEAR MICHAEL, YOUR EMAIL CAME THROUGH TO ME (AND I DO BELIEVE YOU NEED STAN OR PEGGY OR SOMEONE TO ASSIST YOU). I WOULD BE HAPPY TO SING AT THE WEDDING, AND YOUR IDEA ABOUT SINGING ALONGSIDE BRIGITTE WAS JUST FASCINATING, I WAS HOPING TO PROCURE BECKY’S YOUNGER SISTER AND HER FRIENDS FROM COLLEGE TO SING BACK UP. I DO BELIEVE YOU SHOULD WORK WITH THE CHILDREN BUT I MUST REMIND YOU THAT THE COUPLE YOU REFER TO AS “GOY” AND “DIET REDHEAD”  IS NAMED JEREMY AND MAGDA; TRY NOT TO CALL THEM THAT, NO MATTER HOW GHASTLY JEREMY CAN BE. I WANT TO ASK IF IT’S POSSIBLE TO ASK MEGAN TO SING AT THE WEDDING.YOUR’S TRULY,TOM TO: [email protected]FROM: [email protected]THANKS SO MUCH! I LIKE WORKING WITH KIDS! BUT I NEVER FIT IN WITH THE BRITS, I ALREADY DON’T FIT IN WITH PEOPLE WHO SOUND LIKE WALTER CRONKITE AND I SOMETIMES FEEL THAT JEREMY AND MAGDA STARE AT ME LIKE I AM AN ALIEN FROM ANOTHER PLANET.NO DO NOT ASK MEGAN OR ALLOW HER TO SING, ALL THE FOCUS WILL LAND ON HER AND NOT THE BRIDES. ASK STAN AND PEGGY ABOUT IT, THEY WERE THERE AT HER HUSBAND’S 40TH BIRTHDAY PARTY.LOVE (BUT NOT HOMO),MICHAELTom rolled his eyes at the “but not homo” from Michael, this was the hazards of befriending straight older men, but he found Michael much more accepting of people who are same-sex oriented than say, Pam Jones (who just declared him “lazy” regarding attracting women). Before he logged off his computer, he saw another email pop up from Joyce’s glamorous, former soap opera actress friend Megan. TO: [email protected]FROM: [email protected]BONJOUR TOM, THIS IS MEGAN. I WAS OFFERING TO SING WITH YOU AND BRIGITTE AND THE BARDEN BELLAS FOR THE WEDDING. I CAN SING “ZOU BISOU BISOU”LOVE,MEGAN TO: [email protected]FROM: [email protected]DEAREST MEGAN, YOU ARE SO KIND TO OFFER YOUR SERVICES BUT I AM AFRAID I NEED TO DECLINE THE OFFER.LOVE,TOM 
November 2011
Fat Amy laid on her Bella house bed with a large pizza topped with sausage, peppers, garlic, onions, pepperoni, double the sauce, and meatballs while sipping some box wine when she noticed her cell phone was ringing. “Uggggh it is my break away from being the hot, sexy fat ass of Barden University right now! What do they want?” she irritatingly wondered. She picked up and, to her excitement, saw it was someone familiar and answered the call. “Fat Amy: Barden Bella and Plus Size Sex-sation, how may I direct your call,” she asked. Tom got right to it: “Hello Patricia, why do you call yourself ‘Fat Amy’?” he asked; “So twig bitches don’t call me that behind my back and you can’t rhyme with the name ‘Amy’.” Tom rolled his eyes, but figured that she had a big point; he got right back to business: “Fat Amy, I was wondering if you and your friends could sing as a chorus with me and….” “For my big sister’s wedding?!? Yasssssss, the skinny hot ass to my fat hot ass! I am going to get all the girls together!” Tom put the phone down and took a loud breath: “Well that wasn’t difficult.”
June 2013
Alone: her last evening of being a single, unmarried woman. Joyce is staying over at Joan’s place, whereas their relatives kindly understood why Becky needed this time and space alone. She needed to ruminate on everything: after years of being closeted and of kissing so many frogs who didn’t turn out to be Princesses, she found her true love and she was ready to join in something so intimate. She just needed her rest.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“When I love I get a feeling like I'm travelling through the sky On the wings of a nightingale.” The Everly Brothers (On the Wings of A Nightingale)TWO WORLDS COLLIDING….THAT WILL BE NEVER TORN APART!MR. AND MS. GILLIES & THE RAMSAY FAMILY GRACIOUSLY INVITE YOU TO THE WEDDING OFREBECCA DIONNE GILLIES AND JOYCE PHOEBE RAMSAYON JUNE 2TH, 2012, 10 AMAT THE CHURCH OF ST. FRANCIS XAVIERRECEPTION FOLLOWS AT TAVERN ON THE GREEN 7:30 PMDRESS CASUAL AND ECLETIC.RSVP TO PEGGY OLSON RIZZO AND JOAN HOLLOWAY HARRIS“I now pronounce you, Joyce Phoebe Ramsay and Rebecca Dionne Gillies, to be lawfully wedded wives,” intoned Father Rafael, who then smiled and added “and lock lips.” Joyce took a good look at her new bride before kissing her: Becky was wearing a designer white jumpsuit she bought from a vintage clothing store (honestly it was from the 1970s and it’s not vintage) and a pair of high heels she bought on sale from Lord & Taylor with a silver Elsa Peretti heart necklace (borrowed from Bridget) that set off Becky’s creamy skin; above, the beautiful girl had bright blue earrings with matching eyeshadow over a very creamy and nude lipped face. Becky looked twice the young and mature beauty she was the week before, especially with this Liz Taylor-esque hairdo done up by Kali’s Indiana friend Steve. If Carol looked like Eva Marie Saint, then Becky looked like a brunette and couture-clad Florence Henderson. When Becky snuck in a little tongue to Joyce’s mouth, Joyce felt the choir (sister in law Fat Amy, her friends, Brigitte, and Tom) singing “It Must Have Been Love” ever louder.The whole room clapped. On her side, she saw her nieces and nephews with their children along with her friends. Peggy and Stan were clapping and beaming with their kids following and the grandkids hopping up and down; Joan dabbed her eyes with a handkerchief and kissed Abe on the lips, Abe then passed the kiss on to Becky’s side directly to Bridget’s friend Jude, who then got really into it with him and had to get Peggy and Mark to pull them apart lest they make love on a church aisle. Grandmother O’Hara came up to Joyce to pinch her cheeks with Becky’s Cousin Kelly and her husband Mac bouncing with their child. Joyce’s father in law embraced the older woman and told her “You are a part of our family now.”It was a reception to remember: Joyce had a good time mingling with people and stealing kisses and hand clutching from Becky, her new in-laws adored Bridget, she spotted Kali and Joan competing with whoever can drink the most (stalemate), the Draper kids having a good time with folks from Indiana, and after Magda had joined in with her husband and the Campbells, Cosgroves, and more folks from Indiana and London in getting drunk and whacking each other playfully with folding chairs, Magda started to dance on the table and took her panties off (they were black and lacy and read “Naughty”). Magda smacked Bridget’s and Mark’s butts and urged them to “shake your big tit arses” and her panties started to fly around the room, landing on people who then started to make passionate and down and dirty love with their partners. Mother In Law tossed the panties between the Darcy’s and Rizzo’s before walking off with her husband.Did Becky and Joyce join in? No. They took a ride on Joyce’s old Vespa with Becky at front (Joyce cannot drive like she used to) to their apartment where they made love until they slept and started packing for their European honeymoon.As they rode to their apartment, Joyce began to muse over how her life changed and about the publicity she has gotten for her photographs over the past few years and how the joy she lost when Carol died had come back to her and it was thanks to opening herself up to this young and beautiful girl. She whispered into Becky’s ear: “My darling wife, my fellow traveler, my muse, my partner, the one who colors my world” and Becky started to sniffle and say “Don’t you dare make me cry Joyce, I am riding.” She then smiled and said “I love you so much, you remind me of what life has to bring, of what my future will bring.”

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“Mommy had. A little baby. There he is. Fast asleep. He's just. A little plaything. Why not. Wake him up? Cute. Cute. Little baby. Little pee pee. Little toes. Now he's comin' to me. Crawl across. The kitchen floor.Baby, baby, please let me hold him I want to make him stay up all night Sister, sister, he's just a plaything we want to make him stay up all night Yeah we do.” The Talking Heads (Stay up Late)“How did you dream last night, my darling?” asked Becky one sweet Spanish morning. Joyce had woken up to a small table Becky set in their suite with café con leche, tomato on toast, and some churros with chocolate sauce she suspected was ordered from room service or that Becky actually walked out and fetched. With her tall, slim form sheathed in a mint green satin robe and coral peach pajamas, with the sunlight from the window lighting up behind her, Becky looked even more beautiful.Joyce sat up and moved to the side of the bed, where her now-softer stomach protruded over as she got up, “I had a great dream, starred me and you swimming on a beach minus this pudge” as she jokingly put her hand on her stomach. Becky pulled Joyce in her arms and kissed her, then affectionately traced her pointer finger in what was supposed to be pretty patterns under Joyce’s t-shirt on her stomach. “I actually hold a very high regard for your wobbly bits, and am avoiding the temptation of taking you to bed, since I know there is more to see in Seville.” Joyce thought of Bridget’s curvaceous form, “Not as wobbly as some pretty girls?” giggled the older woman. Becky soon pressed her chest to her and giggled back “Not as petite and well-proportioned as some pretty girls?”After listening to a lecture on the history of the lesbian community in Seville and visiting the many art museums in the city, the couple soon found a nice spot where they nosh on some tapas and split a Spanish tortilla (looks more like an egg and potato omelet than the Mexican tortillas they were more accustomed to). Joyce ordered their sangrias and cups of hot water to put the tea bags they brought along in; she noticed Becky squirming as she asked for no alcohol. “What is it my love?” asked Joyce, concerned that her young bride was very uncomfortable. “Joyce I have a bit of a question I want to ask you, regarding our future,” slowly began Becky, who then gulped and added “I was wondering, how you would have reacted if I told you that I am, right now, expecting our first child?” Joyce stood up in shock and soaked it all in: she knew that Becky desired to have children and that Becky’s friend Giles (who seemed to have a unrequited crush on her) volunteered to donate his sperm, something that she willingly accepted, but it wasn’t expected the results would be fruitful so soon……“Dearest Rebecca, I would gladly become the mother of your children,” as she hugged and embraced Becky right in that restaurant in front of occupants and waiters who stood gaping in shock or disgust or staring in awe, proclaiming how romantic it all was. Joyce would gladly face a gazillion of them if it meant ensuring everything for their young family, one anxiety that she was anxious about was whether she’d adequately mother their young children. She gazed at Becky and lovingly felt her for-now flat stomach, “Cinderella swallowed a pumpkin seed?” and Becky laughed and said “No, I shall be carrying Cinderella to the ball.”Joyce added, smiling “And we will have many opportunities to stay up late.”

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“

Is this a lasting treasure

Or just a moment's pleasure

Can I believe the magic in your sighs Will you still love me tomorrow?
” Carole King (Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?)
“Just so you remember: Bridget and Mark are also bringing Magda, Jeremy, and their children along for Thanksgiving,” said Becky as she rested her swollen ankles on the sofa and patted her now protruding belly before filling the large plastic bowl for the trick or treaters that would soon be coming to the door.Joyce started to groan: she really couldn’t stand that one couple, even after Magda got herself stinking drunk at their wedding reception. Jeremy was full of self-importance and privilege, so unaware of how mediocre he was while bland Magda was obsessed with keeping up appearances and with being Ms. Perfect, Joyce wondered how a vivacious and interesting woman like Bridget would even befriend her. She remembered Joan rolling her eyes at the younger woman for her boring and chill manner and dress, dismissing her (with one glance) as a silly, pampered housewife who overlooked her husband’s indiscretions and did nothing productive and then Sally Draper snarked “Just like my mother.”Joyce collected her faculties and asked Becky: “So who will be coming for Thanksgiving?” Becky got her list out and read out: my sisters Esther and Patricia will be visiting, Mom and Dad will be spending the holiday with Grandma and come visit with her for Christmas, Michael will be coming, Julio and Keith will stop by before heading to Stan and Peggys', Kali is spending the holiday with Joan in Florida, Shazzer is going to stay with us but wants to meet with one of Peggy’s nephews, Bridget and Mark will bring their son along, my Aunt and Uncle from London will be traveling with them, Olga and Chiwetel will be coming the weekend before and tour New York, Abe is coming, Mac and Kelly will be coming, Draper kids will be heading to Hawkins, and Megan will be visiting her nieces and nephews in Quebec.” “So that is what? Twenty two people, do you think we will accommodate all of them?” “Bridget is going to help with soup and clean up and there will be help in the kitchen or we can order some pre-prepared dishes. I know that Esther is dying to show off her cooking prowess. She has mastered French, American, Hungarian, and Italian, so far.” “Think you can try to rest?” “Can at least do some small duties?” “Yes….I don’t think anyone is in the mood for blue soup, no matter how delicious Bridget makes it.”“Mrs. Ramsay…?” asked a small voice. Joyce turned around and saw Constance, the young adolescent daughter of Magda and Jeremy, so far she really liked this girl, nothing like her parents and also her low-key, non-girly girl style reminded her slightly of herself when she was younger. Joyce smiled and softly replied: “What is it sweetie?” The slightly plump redhead looked nervous with her vivid eyes focusing nervously on Joyce and sputtered “How did you know that you liked girls?” Joyce looked gently at the young girl and thought a bit glumly about the girls’ parents: would they be as dismissive and conformist as her own parents were? She often grew up thinking her parents saw her as a failure for not marrying a banker and settling down with 2 kids by the time she was 27, even after her relationship with Carol, relations were quite strained. She lamented to herself that a sensitive, intelligent, verbose young girl had to live with parents as insipid, unimaginative, conventional, and hypocritical as Magda and Jeremy…. “Ever since I saw Glinda the Good Witch in The Wizard of Oz, pretty much, but girls are very pretty to look at in general with nice voices and soft sweaters with perfect penmanship. Are you worried sweetie?” Constance smiled, “I think Emma Watson is very pretty,” she then frowned and said “But I am concerned about my parents, would they find it strange? Everyone is expecting me to have a boyfriend soon, I remember how Mummy and Daddy and their friends wanted Auntie Bridget to get married before she got too old to have babies. I think the same is happening with me. Did you ever deal with this?”Joyce thought a bit and said: “Yes. And you will find it happens all the time, people are so tied up with how they think other people should live, that they forget to look at the bigger picture and to focus on their own lives. No one is perfect, not even our parents, or myself,” she motioned the girl to have a hug with her. “I cannot promise that your life will be free from people sticking their noses where they don’t belong, or that they will be nice to you, I cannot certainly promise that your parents will react in a way that is beneficial to you. But what I can guarantee is that you will find people who will love and accept you, even admire you for what you are, you will either find the One or you will date around. I can tell you that your life is your own to live, and you cannot waste it on the fickle and narrow opinions of others. I have been living about 80 something years I am old enough to be your grandmother and I can tell you that things have been getting better for us throughout my lifetime. You do not have to hide in the shadows wearing sacks from Marks & Spencer plopping out babies during your childbearing years, listening to some boor talk about the hot young girls from the office, as if you weren’t right there. Life is short, and I, your Aunt Becky, and I guarantee our whole circle will love you for you.”“Constance! Your mother and Bridget need aid with the green beans!” shouted Becky as she came in, belly first.“Yes Auntie Becky,” said Constance as she separated from Joyce’s arms and before she left, she hugged Becky and whispered “I think that Mrs. Joyce will be a good Mum.” Becky patted her back and said “I think so too Constance” and gently shooed the girl away. Becky smiled at Joyce.“How long were you listening to that?” smirked Joyce, noting her wife’s knowing smile and the glow on her oval face. “I listened to all of that,” smiled Becky as she waddled over to her elderly wife “You were amazing, you know that? I really don’t know how Jeremy and Magda would react, they were kind to me, if a bit oblivious on Jeremy’s part but I wouldn’t know how they’d react to their own child coming out of the closet.”Joyce smiled warmly and patted her wife’s belly, “Do you think this will bode well for our future children? That I will be a good mother?” as she laid a kiss on the widest part of the abdomen, Becky clutched her hands to help her up and said “I think you, will be an amazing Mum, and your children will be lucky to have you around to know. From what Peggy told me, you are brilliant with younger people, you are brilliant at a lot of things. You find it happens all the time.” They both kissed and then Tom came in to tell them dinner was ready, they waited for him to leave, and set off together to a circle of love.