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I groaned and rolled over in bed as my phone vibrated for the third time that night. I had dodged the first three calls not even bothering to check the caller ID but it had come to my realization that whoever it was wouldn’t stop calling until I picked up.I sat up and turned on the lamp that was on my nightstand before reaching out for the phone. I sighed when I saw his name on the screen and pressed the green button before taking the device to my ear.‘’Luke?’’ I asked. ‘’Why are you calling me at three in the morning?’’I heard some shuffling in the background and I rolled my eyes before plopping myself down on the bed once again.‘’I’m just here and I thought I saw you and I just wanted to say hi.’’ His voice was deep and slurry and I knew him too well. He was either drunk or high and this was of course the only reason he was even calling in the first place.‘’Well… are you okay?’’ I bit my lip hoping he would say yes so that I could go back to sleep.I heard his heavy breathing on the other side of the phone and before I could get an answer the line went dead. My heart started pounding in my chest at the thought of him being hurt and I immediately called him back. I let it ring a few times before hanging up and calling again, repeating this same action three or four times before jumping off my bed and thinking of where he could be and how I would find him on a Saturday night in New York City with all the people that were in the streets.Luke and I had broken up over six months ago, me leaving our shared apartment over one stupid fight and him never chasing after me. In spite of us breaking up, we had managed to maintain a civilized relationship since then. We had seen, called and hung out with each other many times, and although we were no longer together, it was evident that we still cared about one another very much. This wasn’t the first night that Luke had called me in a non-sober state. We had been doing this for months now. He’d call me and I’d pick him up, take him to his house and help him sober up before leaving ‘till next time. Of course it wasn’t just him. I had been in his position quite a few times and he had returned the favor. It was as if this was our new way of spending time with each other without admitting that we actually wanted to.Seeing as he wouldn’t pick up I quickly typed out a message:Text me so I know you’re okay.I hit send and put on a pair of blue skinny jeans, a red t-shirt and black Converse before heading to the bathroom to wash up. I expected his reply when I came back to the room but still nothing so I decided to call him one more time.The phone rang twice before his voice came out of the speaker and I sighed in relief.‘’Hello?’’‘’Luke, I-‘’ I was cut off by some female screams in the background and some indie rock song I didn’t recognize. ‘’Luke, where are you?’’ He didn’t answer but I knew it was because he couldn’t hear properly. I heard the sound of a door opening and closing and soon enough the music was gone. ‘’Hey, I’m gonna come pick you up. Where are you?’’ I asked again.‘’I don’t know, um, can you pick me up?’’ His voice was serious and I couldn’t stop myself from giggling at his state.‘’Yeah, but I need you to text me the address. Can you do that?’’ I held the phone in-between my shoulder and ear as I grabbed my car keys and threw on a grey hoodie and beanie before making my way outside.‘’Ummm…’’ He began. ‘’There’s this… red and yellow thing, I’m not sure. Aaaaand…’’ He drew a breath before continuing. ‘’Oh, yeah. And there’s like… a lot of people, a lot.’’I laughed as I started the engine of my black Hilux and hit the speaker button before exiting my driveway.‘’Okay, that’s good. Are you in a bar? A club? A house?’’‘’Hm.’’ He simply stated. I could almost see him looking around in an attempt to answer me. ‘’Dunno. Maybe. There’s this red and yellow thing though.’’‘’Are you in that bar that’s next to a McDonald’s?’’ I questioned.‘’Yeah, that’s what it’s called. Good. Can you pick me up? I’m scared.’’ He mentioned those last two words in a whisper and my breathing got uneven. I stepped on the accelerator as I took the next curve, now only a few blocks away from the place Luke had described.‘’Luke, are you okay? What are you scared of? Don’t you dare move from that bar, I’m almost there.’’ I spoke fast and tripped over my own words but all I needed to do was get to where he was and make sure he was safe.‘’Elmo’s chasing me!’’ He yelled before bursting into laughter.I rolled my eyes as I parked in front of Venom’s and ended the call when I located him from the corner of my eye. I took off my seat belt and set the alarm on before quickly crossing the street and joining him.Luke was sat on a pair of concrete stairs that led up to the entrance of the bar in just a pair of black skinny jeans that were - not to my surprise - ripped on his left knee and a white t-shirt. It was winter and although I knew he barely felt the cold, his lips were already a soft shade of light blue and I could see the goose bumps on his bare arm. I took a seat next to him without saying a word and neither did he as he passed me the joint that was placed between his thumb and index finger. I grabbed it without hesitation and took a small drag. I closed my eyes for a moment and Luke quickly snatched the beanie from my head to put it on his own.‘’You know…’’ I began, handing him the joint. ‘’I haven’t had one since the last time we smoked together.’’He took a hit of the marijuana, his eyes not once leaving the tip of his tennis shoes.‘’Yeah, I remember that.’’ His cheeks turned red and he smirked before taking one last drag and putting it out. ‘’It was the last time we had sex too.’’ His head shot up and when his gaze met mine I was lost for words.His eyes were the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. Of course he himself had an inexplicable beauty that was out of this world but the color of his eyes was something that I wouldn’t be able to forget, not in a million years. It wasn’t only the color though; it wasn’t just the fact that when I looked into his light blue orbs I was instantly reminded of the ocean, transparent and crystal clear. It wasn’t just that they could easily be confused with the most beautiful and valuable zircon gemstone and the ability they had to leave you breathless. No, that wasn’t even close.It was the way he looked at you, the way he was looking at me that night. It was how in spite of them being red and puffy and how he could barely keep them open, they still shone and had a special glim that could have me looking at them for hours. It was how he managed to show different things throughout them; to show passion, understanding, happiness, sadness, anger. It was the fact that he gave away his feelings through them. It was how by just looking into them I knew that he still cared for me, that he still loved me. It was the capability he had to not blink once when he stared into mine, the potentiality they had to wrap me around his fingers. It was how he had me right where he wanted me and all this without even trying.His cold fingertips slightly touched the back of my hand and I was brought back down to earth. I cleared my throat and scratched my cheek in order to retrieve my hand from his and soon enough I was on my feet.‘’I should take you home.’’ I said coldly.A few minutes later I had managed to get him to stop taking off his seat belt and to sit tight on the passenger’s seat. In the short seconds that it took me to make my way around the vehicle and get in myself, he was already leaned forward and touching every button possible on the stereo, his eyebrows furrowed in frustration as he could not get it to work. I slapped his hand playfully before starting the engine, loud pop punk music coming in through the speakers since he had turned the volume up. I put it down a bit, his hand immediately reaching for the knob.‘’Stop touching,’’ I reprehended before hitting the back of his hand again. ‘’What do you wanna listen to?’’He didn’t answer so I decided to leave the station that was currently playing as I started my way to his house. I had only made two blocks when he jerked forward again, this time to open the glove compartment and fumble around with the papers that were in it.‘’Luke Hemmings, I swear to God I will drop you off here and you can find your own way back home.’’ I looked at him from the corner of my eye and then focused back on the road.‘’I’m hungry.’’ He said in an almost inaudible voice before pouting.‘’I’ll make you something when we get home, okay?’’‘’But I’m hungry now,’’ he replied in a high pitched voice. ‘’I want Froot Loops.’’I laughed at his request until I noticed he was actually being serious.‘’But Lu-‘’‘’Pleeeeeeeeease,’’ he begged.‘’Fine.’’I inhaled and exhaled as I made a turn into the nearest gas station, parking and making my way into the small store.I came back a few minutes later, a small box of Fruit Loops in hand, and opened the door to find a very displeased Luke.‘’Where’s the milk?’’ He asked before I could even get in.I rolled my eyes and shut the door again, jogging back to the store to get him a pint of milk.-I parked on his driveway and after some stumbling on his behalf we made it to his front door.‘’Did you bring your keys?’’ I raised an eyebrow, already fed up with his behavior.‘’Mmmmm… maybe.’’ He tilted his head to the right as if he were thinking if he had brought them or not but he didn’t add anything else to his answer.I palmed his front and back pockets until I finally found them and we entered his house, him going straight into the kitchen and grabbing a small bowl to pour the milk and cereal in. I turned the lights on and closed the door behind me before following his steps and taking a seat in the stool that was in front of his.I looked around as he ate in silence and I felt a knot tighten in my stomach. Everything was just where I had left it. He hadn’t moved a single painting; he hadn’t changed the color of the walls or put the plates in another cabinet. The only difference was that things were a lot more messy and dirty; of course I wouldn’t expect any less from him living by himself.‘’Want some?’’ I snapped out of it and looked back over to Luke, who was now holding out a spoon full of Fruit Loops and some milk.‘’No, thanks.’’ I smiled.He shrugged and finished eating before putting the bowl inside the sink.‘’All right, go get some sleep, yeah? I’ll wash this up and I’ll call you tomorrow to see how you’re doing.’’ He nodded and I got the water running as he made his way to the wooden stairs that were next to the kitchen.I was drying the bowl and putting it away when I heard a loud thud followed by hysterical laughter come from the direction he had went in. I rolled my eyes already knowing what had happened and closed the cabinet door before following his trail only to find him sitting down on the third step, his face between his hands as he couldn’t stop laughing.‘’Luke, what are you doing?’’ I asked trying to hold back a laugh myself.He took a few deep breaths before finally regaining enough composure to speak.‘’I swear that step wasn’t there a few seconds ago.’’ He said pointing to the fourth step.I approached him and signaled for him to get up and wrap his arm around my shoulders. He did so, and I shivered at the way his skin felt against mine. My face was so close to his neck that I could actually smell the cologne I had bought him for Christmas last year mixed with the scent of weed that still lingered.After a few trips and laughs we were both standing in front of what used to be our room. I opened the door and as I stood out in the hallway he immediately ran to the bed and fell face down onto it. I cringed at the thought of our White King-size Coverlet get dirty because of the sole of his shoes and instantly regretted it. It wasn’t ours anymore; I should know that by now. I inspected the bedroom just like I did the kitchen and just like I thought, it was all untouched and unmoved. The walls were still painted black and that was the only thing I was sure would never change as it was his decision. The bed remained in the same spot, in the middle of two white nightstands, a lamp on each, the one on the right with a digital alarm clock and a few other things. White curtains hung from a metal bar that was placed above a single glass window on the wall that was to my right and a picture of us was still sloppily glued onto the doors of the walk-in closet that was located to my left. I felt tears well up in my eyes when I saw the picture and I bit my lip to hold them back.‘’Luke, come on. Get inside the bed.’’ I ordered, now taking a step inside the room.‘’Only if you come cuddle with me.’’ He responded, his voice muffled because of the covers.‘’What? Luke, no. I have to go.’’ He raised his head just enough for his voice to be audible.‘’Come cuddle with me!’’ I didn’t have enough time to dodge the pillow he threw at me but I caught it with my two hands before throwing it back.‘’You’re being a pain in the ass right now, Hemmings.’’He rolled his eyes and got up only to kick off his shoes and skinny jeans before getting inside the bed. He took off my beanie and placed it on his nightstand.‘’Please?’’ He begged with a pout.‘’Okay, fine. Just until you fall asleep.’’ I gave in and made my way around the bed, already starting to climb in when Luke stopped me.‘’Take them off.’’ He said pointing to my hoodie and jeans.‘’Luke,’’ I warned.He narrowed his eyes and folded his hands in front of him, pleading. I laughed and shook my head before taking off my shoes, jeans and hoodie, leaving us both in only our t-shirts and underwear.I hopped onto the bed and before I could accommodate myself, his body was already pressed against my back and his arm thrown lazily over my waist. His fingertips drew inexistent patterns on my arm and I couldn’t help but close my eyes at the softness of his touch. His nose was buried somewhere between the back of my neck where my blonde hair cascaded over my shoulders and I could feel his hot breath as he inhaled and exhaled against it.‘’I miss this,’’ he mumbled.‘’Luke, please.’’ I begged. We had had this conversation many times before and it had gotten us nowhere but into other stupid fights.‘’This bed feels so big without you.’’ He spoke with conviction and ignored my pleads for him to let it go. I knew he wasn’t just talking to me but also to himself. ‘’I should’ve stopped you.’’ He let out a shaky breath and I knew I shouldn’t have gotten in bed with him in the first place. ‘’That fight was so stupid.’’I didn’t answer. All I did was lie on our bed wrapped in his arms and under his touch. My eyes fluttered open when I heard him shift and look over me.‘’Are you asleep?’’ He asked, not being able to see if I was or not.‘’Why do you only call me when you’re high?’’ I blurted out.He plopped his head back down on the pillow and thought for a moment before answering.‘’I’m too scared, Vic. You left me, why would you wanna come back?’’‘’You said it yourself, Luke. You never stopped me. You never asked me to come back.’’ I sighed. ‘’You get high or drunk and you call me and we always end up here talking about that night but nothing ever changes. The next morning it’s like we’re two strangers and we do this over and over again.’’‘’Do you miss me?’’ He asked ignoring what I had just said.‘’That has nothing to do wi-‘’‘’Do you miss me?’’ He repeated, cutting me off.‘’Yes.’’‘’That’s all I need to know.’’ He placed a light kiss on my cheek and soon enough we were both asleep.-I opened my eyes unaware of the time but sure I had spent the night. The sun shone with all its intensity illuminating the small room and I smiled as I remembered Luke’s face when I told him I wanted white curtains. It could be five in the morning or six in the afternoon for all I knew because there was always a bright light in this part of the house.I stretched my arms and flipped over only to meet a wide-awake Luke. His head was perched on top of his hand, his elbow propped up on his pillow. He looked at me through sleepy eyes and in the daylight I couldn’t help but notice the stubble that was forming on his chin due to the lack of shaving. His blonde hair was messy and spiked up in all sorts of different directions and I could hear his stomach growling.‘’Hey, um, thanks for last night.’’ He said breaking the silence.‘’Yeah, no problem.’’ I smiled. ‘’Do you want me to make you breakfast before I go?’’ I asked before shifting and starting to get up.‘’Don’t go.’’He took me by the arm and I stayed still for a second before facing him.‘’It’s always the same. I take care of you and then I leave.’’ I explained in hopes of getting away from his grasp.‘’Not today…’’ He trailed off as he tugged on my arm. I gave in and reassumed my previous position on the bed.‘’I miss you too.’’ Luke whispered as he stared into my eyes. ‘’Stay.’’‘’Okay,’’ I began. ‘’We’ll eat breakfast.’’‘’No,’’ he whispered. He shifted so that his body hovered above mine, his hands resting on either side of my head and his lips ever so close to mine. His eyes wandered from my own to my lips back and forth a few times before continuing. ‘’Stay here…’’ Our lips almost touched as he spoke and my chest rose up and down with anticipation. ‘’… with me.’’Luke slowly leaned in and closed the small distance between us to place one light kiss on my lips. I closed my eyes and sighed as he pulled away, content under his touch and never wanting to leave. I placed my hand on the back of his neck and brought him close for another kiss, a longer yet much more passionate one, our speed never increasing, both of us keeping a steady pace and wanting this moment to last forever.One of his hands trailed down the length of my arm leaving a tingling sensation in each spot his fingertips touched. The tip of my tongue brushed over his bottom lip and he allowed for it to explore his mouth, mine finding his almost immediately and for a moment focusing on nothing else but that. I used my free hand to cup his cheek and my index finger grazed over the outline of his jaw as I softly bit the spot where his lip ring rested. I earned a small whimper on his behalf and he pulled away to look into my eyes, asking for permission to continue.I nodded and soon enough his lips were leaving wet, open-mouthed kisses on my neck. I tilted my head back to grant him more access and I tugged slightly on his hair when his teeth sunk in slowly on my skin, his tongue and lips soothing the ache right away. His hand travelled down my stomach until it reached the hem of my shirt, his lips not leaving my neck and jaw for a second. He placed his hand underneath the fabric and he gently pressed his palm on my waist.‘’Luke,’’ I moaned his name softly and trailed my hand down his torso and all the way to the hem of his shirt. I tugged on it and motioned for him to get rid of it as I did the same with my own.He groaned as his chest met mine for a mere second, the heat radiating off of his making me whimper in return. His lips moved to my collarbone where they left both wet kisses and aching skin that would sometime later become a purple blotch. I palmed his erection throughout his black boxers and he bucked his hips forward before concentrating on the back of my bra. I sat up for just enough time for him to unhook it and his fingertips accompanied the straps down my arms until it was finally off and on the floor.Luke used his hand to push my back down onto the bed where I reconnected our lips, never getting enough of the way he tasted and still not making up for all the time I had spent not kissing him. I moaned against his lips as his index and middle finger found their way over the soft fabric of my underwear and then maneuvered enough to put it to the side. One of his fingers ran up my already wet slit and rubbed my clit slightly; I took his bottom lip between my teeth and his touch ceased for a second.‘’Make love to me,’’ I said against his lips.He didn’t reply, instead he readjusted his hands so that they were both placed on my hips where the hem of my underwear laid in order to keep me still. His now swollen lips were decisively kissing my jaw and neck, slowly moving down to my chest and breasts where he took an extra few seconds. They continued to work down the length of my stomach and abdomen until they were at the same height as his hands. He kissed the inside of my thighs and I couldn’t help but tug on his hair as I felt him closer and closer to my heat.Luke avidly removed the only items of clothing that were standing in our way and my lips parted when he positioned himself at my entrance. His hand found mine and he held onto it, pressing it on the bed next to my head. He placed a small kiss on my lips before pushing himself in slowly. I moaned his name as I adjusted to him, his absence during all this time finally making itself noticeable. One single tear escaped my eyes and he brushed it off with his thumb before pulling out and then back in, a small moan falling off his lips. He thrust into me repeatedly, first slowly and then increasing his speed. I could see the sweat begin to form in his forehead and lost strands of his hair getting caught up in it. His hand never left mine and I altered between moaning and drowning them out against his skin.I felt my orgasm begin to build and I groped my free hand on his bicep, my nails digging into it and leaving crescent shaped marks.‘’Baby…’’ I managed to breathe out in the middle of heavy pants.‘’Shhh, babe.’’ He pressed his lips against mine to stop me from saying the words he already knew.His hand found its way between our bodies and his middle finger rubbed circular figures against my clit. I whimpered at the contact and I knew I wouldn’t last much longer under his touch. Luke kept pounding into me and I clenched around him as I hit my climax. My eyes were closed shut and I bit down on my lip before moaning loudly as my orgasm took over me. My fingernails dug into his arm and he groaned at the feeling, his thrusts now also becoming sloppy and uneven.I forced myself to open my eyes as I clenched around him once again but this time to bring him over the edge. I watched as his lips parted and his eyebrows furrowed, his final thrust hard and deep and my name escaping his lips as his warmth filled me. He dropped his forehead and pressed it against my own, maintaining that position as he caught his breath and finally rested his body on mine.His cheek was pressed on my chest and his fingers caressed my bare skin as my hands played with his hair. We lay in bed in silence, simply enjoying each other’s company and embracing what had happened after so much time.I looked around his room, our room and then back at him. I thought about all the memories we had shared throughout the years and about everything that had happened in this house. I thought about the day we bought it and how hard we had both worked in order to get it. I thought about our dreams of him taking me up the stairs bridal style in my wedding dress and about the screams and laughter of the three kids we wanted to have echoing throughout the walls. I thought about the boy I had fell in love with and about how wrong I was to leave thinking he was no longer there. I realized I had given up on the thing I loved the most on the face of the Earth and I was instantly filled with regret. It wasn’t him who was stupid for letting me go. It was me who was stupid for leaving him in the first place. I wanted to spend eternity by his side and I would choose him over and over again if I had to go back to the day we first met. The love I had for Luke was inexplicable and I always found myself at a loss for words when I thought about what made me fall for him in the first place. It was simply meant to be. I was meant to be his and he was meant to be mine and it took me six months and a lot of ups and downs to finally accept that I was wrong. I needed him and my life wasn’t truly my life if it wasn’t by his side. I needed him, I wanted him and I felt my chest tighten when the next thought popped up in my head.‘’Luke?’’ I said trying to get his attention.He tilted his head so that his chin was resting on my chest and his eyes staring into mine.‘’Hm?’’ He simply replied.‘’I think… I think I may have just fallen in love with you all over again.’’
