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"Moegi-sensei, Udon-sensei, we are in need of some advisement. Do you have a moment?" Mitsuki inquired formally."Sure. What do you need help with?" "We know that you are his best friends, so you must know-" Sarada started.Boruto cut her off, jumping straight to the point. "How do we beat Konohamaru-sensei in a fight? What are his weaknesses?" The teachers turned to each other, with evil grins."Firstly." Moegi said, scratching her chin pensively. "Taijutsu isn't his strong suit. He spent half of class tripping over his scarf, so he never was quite able to master it.""That's not necessarily true." Udon cut in. "During the Chunin exams, after exhausting his chakara, a punch is how he was able to defeat Naruto." "HE WHAT?!" The three kids screeched in unison. "You mean he hasn't bragged about it to you guys? That's weird. Maybe he's finally grown up."Boruto wasn't going to let the investigation get off track. "My sexy jutsu isn't working on him. Do you know what kind of girls he likes?"The sensei shared a look, having a silent conversation. "Well, that would explain a lot." Moegi chuckled. "When we were teenagers, at the peak of hormones, he invented a sexy yaoi jutsu..."Udon nodded in agreement. "Ah. So, that's why he never asked Hanabi out." A wicked grin spread across Moegi's face. "Sorry, kids. Gotta run. He is so going to get it for not telling us."
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Boruto looked at his teammates and shrugged. "Labels don't matter. It's the essence of the potato chips that truly counts, eh Mitsuki?""Labels do matter to an extent." Sarada cut in. "What if we accidentally say something insulting because we didn't know? I think it's best to ask.""I think both of you are right." Mitsuki smiled. "And I have just the plan."---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------"Konohamaru-sensei." Cho-Cho put on her most innocent act. "I head that was a rough mission you guys were on just now. Would you like a snack?" She held out two bags of potato chips. One pink bag, and one in blue. Konohamaru sighed and rolled his eyes. "Not you guys too. I am the highest ranking Jonin of my generation for a reason, right? I'm not dumb. I know what you all are trying to do. "He walked toward Moegi and Udon. "But to answer your question Cho-Cho," He said, slinging an arm over each of his friend's shoulders, grinning. "Why limit yourself to one, when you can have both?"
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"So." Udon said as they sat down to eat. "Care to elaborate on your earlier comment?""Nope." Konohamaru smiled cheekily.Moegi glared daggers at him. “Okay, sorry. I did a lot of thinking about it, and I...” He took a nervous breath “You’re my best friends, and I love you guys, but I got to thinking, and I realized something. It’s not just best friend love. So, I was wondering if you would go out with me?”He closed his eyes an braced himself. Udon smiled and laughed. "Talk about a late bloomer." Moegi rolled her eyes. "Right?! We've literally been waiting 20 years for you to ask."
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Konohamaru was going to vomit. His stomach had been churning all day in anticipation for this inevitable assignment. "Sensei, you're really pale. Are you alright?" He gave Sarada a smile and a thumbs up, but she didn't look convinced. Luckily, he was saved from responding by the Hokage."I have a mission for you guys. One of the instructors at the Sand Academy is sick, and so I have been asked to send them a substitute. I have arranged for you to teach classes tommorow. My hope is for you to realise how difficult it is and to gain a new respect for your own instructors." He said, looking pointedly at Boruto. "Tommorow? But my parent said that it's-" "I am fully aware of what day it is, thank you." Shikamaru leaned in, whispering. "Sir, shouldn't he-" "Thank you, nii-chan." Konohamaru cut him off before Shikamaru could change the Hokage's mind. He dropped into a low bow. "You're welcome, 'Maru. Take the rest of the day off to work on a lesson plan.""Yes, sir." When he stood up, he was blinking back tears. Everyone watched in confusion as he rushed out the door."Explain." Shikamaru demanded. "Why do you need him for this mission? It's the 20th anniversary of Lord Third's death. As head of the clan, he should be at the memorial service.""No. He was absolutely distraught at the 10th memorial, and if his reaction just now is any indication, he doesn't want to go through that again."Shikamaru opened his mouth to argue, but Naruto held up a hand. "Trust me, I know him better than you. This is for the best. That is my final decision."He turned to the kids. "As for you three, I have an additional mission. Keep him distracted. His parents and uncle died around this time of year as well, so he always gets really depressed. Please, take care of my little brother. "Yes, sir." They chorused in unison.
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The new Team Seven was put on the alert as they approached Sarutobi estate. Voices ahead were causing a commotion. They ducked behind some shrubbery to avoid being seen."Why do you always have to be so obnoxious?" Konohmaru sighed, rolling his eyes and slumping his shoulders in exasperation. "I'm not obnoxious." Moegi insisted, putting her hands on her hips. "You're just oblivious.""I can't believe I'm saying this, but Moegi is right." Udon stood the doorway, rubbing at his eyes sleepily, still in his pajamas. "Take the cell phone. Just for today. Nobody is implying that you would need to call for help, or whatever it is your ego is thinking. It's not for you, but for us. We- We are the weak ones. We need to know that you're okay.""Oh." Konohamaru's eyes widened in understanding. "Honestly. You're so stupid sometimes." Moegi said, wrapping her arms around his neck, hugging him close."Hey now, this all started because of your lack of communication skills." "I swear I'm dating 12 year olds." Udon yawned, nudging Moegi out of the way and wrapping his arms around Konohamaru's waist."Speaking of which, what are you teaching your kids? It sure as hell isn't surveillance..."
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Konohamaru paused for a second at his front gate. He took a steadying breath, steeling himself before crossing the barrier. He did his best to keep his gaze focused forward as his neighbors stared and whispered.An older woman approached them as they passed her house. "My, my, little Konohamaru. You've grown into quite the young man. Your grandfather would be proud."He smiled and tried to hide a wince at her words. "Thank you ma'am. Please forgive my rudeness, but we need to run. On a mission." He gave her an apologetic smile."Of course, dear. Stay safe." She said, heading back to her garden.Well, this definitely seems like a good time for a distraction. Thought Boruto."So, are we going to talk about you and the other sensei?"Sarada smacked him upside the head. "That's none of your business.""He's my brother, so it is my business.""That may be." Konohamaru smiled a little at the bickering. "But could you keep your voice down? The whole neighborhood doesn't need to know."
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"So, are you going to let us in on what the lesson plan going to be?" Sarada asked, sitting down at their makeshift camp."I suppose that would be a good idea." Konohamaru chuckled. "Well, I was thinking that we could do a lecture about the Rasengan, seeing as it is a staple of our culture. Boruto can do a demonstration-""No way." Sarada cut him off. "Boruto's ego is big enough without all of that attention going to his head. Can't you do it?" Mitsuki nodded. "I couldn't agree more." "Hey. Not you too." Boruto grumbled. "It is the specialty of Lords 4th and 7th after all. Also," he scratched the back of his head, embarrassed. "I've been forbidden to use it casually. The medical team is getting tired of healing me when it burns my hand." Sarada's eyes widened in horror. "That's awful."Konohamaru threw his head back and laughed. "Not nearly as awful as the scolding I will get from Lady Tsunade."
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There was an obnoxious sound coming from Konohamaru's pocket. "Sorry guys, I need to take this. Now is a good resting point anyway." He muttered answering his cell phone. As he talked, he wandered off a little ways.
After an eternity of waiting, the kids grew worried.
"Looks like it is my turn." Mitsuki started towards where Konohamaru was last seen.
He found Konohamaru sitting on a log with his head in his hands. No longer on the phone.
"Konohamaru-sensei, I was wondering if I could get some help." He said tentatively.
That perked the sensei up a bit. "Is everything okay?"
"Yes. Sorry. It's not actually a big deal. It's just a new jutsu I've been practising. I've heard that it is one of your specialties."
That brought out a small grin. "Let's see it."
Mitsuki glanced back to make sure the others weren't watching. They were engrossed in setting up camp. Perfect.
He transformed into a shirtless, blonde haired, blue eyed boy. Features a mix somewhere between Boruto and the Hokage.
"Nope, nope, nope. Not touching that topic with a 10 foot pole."
Konohamaru groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose. From exasperation or to stop a nosebleed, Mitsuki couldn't tell.
Perhaps a bit of both.
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"Aunt Kurenai, Mirai... What a surprise." He said, opening the door with a confused smile. "Lord Konohamaru." He didn't bother trying to hold back a flinch. "We've been over this. Just Konohamaru. Please." He said, slumping his shoulders, exasperated. A voice called out from inside the house. "Don't just stand there, invite them in."He stepped aside, but Kurenai turned away. "Sorry. I didn't realise you were busy. It's not the end of the world, we can come back later.""I insist. There is always time for family. Besides, visits from you are rare, so I doubt this is nothing.""I'm sure you have heard about the commotion after your grandfather's memorial service?" She said, sitting in the offered chair. "Nartuo-niichan did inform me, but I hadn't realised that it was such a big ordeal. He made it sound like most people had left already.""Yes. Thankfully there were only a few witnesses. The issue I'm having is that she doesn't seem to think that her actions were wrong. I was hoping that as head of the clan, she might listen to you.""Okay." He turned to Mirai. "Let's hear your side of things.""Well, you see, people were talking about the future of the clan. Mainly, the end of it...since...um..." She glanced at Udon and blushed. "Since you don't seem very interested in producing an heir... but they were really rude about it. So, I punched my friend in the face for disrespecting my clan leader.""Thank you for defending my honor." Konohamaru bit back a smile. "But I'm used to it by now. I've been harassed sinced I was 10 for idolizing Naruto a little too much.""Not that I'm condoning it by any means." He added after a look from Kurenai. "You should really learn to control that temper."Udon coughed to hide a snicker. Moegi had to leave the room to hide her amusement at his hypocrisy.
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He loves his grandpa, but hates visiting the main family's estate. He gets anxious and unnnerved around the swarm of ANBU that is always surrounding the Hokage's house. It has always felt more like a prison than a home. And now he has to live here. ---------------------------------------------------------------If not for their looks, it would be impossible to tell that they were family. They certainly don't act like it. He can't even remember the last time he's spoken to his uncle, despite living with him. This stupid house is so big that their paths never need to cross. So they never did. ---------------------------------------------------------------The next day at school, when Moegi and Udon hear that he spent the night totally alone, they demand a slumber party. After a week however, their parents decide that it's time to wean him off company so that he can get accustomed to being alone. He makes a vow never to tell them that their efforts have only made things worse. He lays in bed alone and the echoes of their laughter bounce off the walls, haunting him. ---------------------------------------------------------------He has always avoided spending time at the house, so he has never bothered to decorate it. It looks the same as when his grandfather was alive. He loathes this house, but never so much as when he opens the front door to find a 10 year old Mirai. She says that she is running away from home. He decides to let her stay the night, and will sort things out in the morning. He despises the fact that instead of being warm and comforting, the house gives off an old, empty atmosphere. ---------------------------------------------------------------When they turn 18, Moegi and Udon move in. Things are rocky at first. It takes some time for him to adjust to living with people again. During an arugument, he makes the mistake of saying "This is MY house." He watches with jealously as Moegi storms out, slamming the door behind her. He wishes he had somewhere to escape to other than this damned house.---------------------------------------------------------------The Uzumakis stop by for 21st birthday. He smiles, looking around the table at his makeshift family. Finally. This stupid house is starting to feel like a home.
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"Then, the other guy-" Udon stopped mid sentence. He reached up, took Konohamaru's face in his hands, and pulled him closer."Are your eyes blue?" He asked, frowning in confusion. "Have been all day, thanks for noticing." was the cheeky reply. "The Science Team invented these cool contacts. They're equipped with some sweet features. Zoom, night vision, and all kinds of other things.""That's not fair. Why do you get picked for all the fun stuff? I'm the tech savvy one." Udon pouted. "Not to mention, I'm actually blind."
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Udon rolled his eyes at the endless whining as he brushed Konohamaru's hair. "Ouch. Don't pull so hard. That hurts.""That's funny. I don't remember you complaining last night." Udon smirked from above him on the couch, but softened his touch. "Well, maybe you could distract me again...""No. Bad 'Maru." There was a light thud from Udon whacking him on the arm with the hairbrush. "I am not going through all of this effort just to mess it up."It was Konohamaru's turn to roll his eyes. "You know, you don't have to go through the effort at all." "Yes, I do. You lost the bet. Whatever the other person wants for a week. If I let you slide on this, you will try to talk me out of everything for the rest of my life."Konohamaru threw his head back in exasperation, earning him another smack. "Mo' help me out here.""You did agree to anything." She said, not looking up from her phone. "You're lucky he just wants to do your hair. If it were me, you would be doing all of my chores." "It's not even a cool afro. It's just a frizzy mess.""It's cute and fluffy." Udon corrected, emphasing his point by running a hand through said fluff. "Right Moegi?""You're on your own with that one. You might want to get your glasses checked."
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Konohamaru yelped and doubled over in pain as a typical Moegi-type smack smashed against his head. Sure enough, his suspicions were confirmed when he raised his head to come face to face with his red headed, red faced girlfriend. "What was that for?!" He rubbed the back of his head. "Your scarf. It's gone.""Yeah. It's at the tailor's. It got pretty torn up on that last mission." "You're such an asshole." She screeched. "What are you talking about? I'm an asshole for getting my scarf fixed?" He yelled back, exasperated. "Udon. Thank god you're here." He rushed over as Udon walked in and clung to the other boy's arm. "You gotta help me. Moegi has gone crazy." "He won't save you. Udon agrees with me." "Wait a minute. I agree with nothing yet." Udon held up a hand. "What is going on?" "Take a look at our boyfriend." Udon gave Konohamaru a once over and scowled. "That's really rude 'Maru.""Not you too." Konohamaru groaned and ran a hand over his face. "You guys have 5 seconds to explain what the hell you're talking about.""We finally get to see you without a scarf, and you go and wear a turtle neck. It's inconsiderate to those of us who have been patiently for a glimpse." "Am I getting this right? You attacked me..." Konohamaru said slowly. "Because you have a neck fetish?""Technically, we are upset because you are a tease." "You could have just asked." Konohamaru laughed and wrestled his shirt over his head.
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His route was blocked by a small horde of Akuta. He retreated and assessed their movements from the shadows. Eight enemies in the immediate vicinity and five more nearby. They were herding the citizens like cattle. A child's scream pierced his ears. A small boy had launched himself at the enemy and was struck down. Before his brain realized what his body was doing, Konohamaru had a kunai clutched in his hand and was driving forward. The kunai plunged into the mask, and the Akuta vanished with a puff of smoke. He sent out clones to help the other hostages to safety while he charged toward the other opponents. He used the momentary surprise to send out a swarm of shuriken ripping into the enemies. He twisted and turned, avoiding a number of attacks from the incoming wave of aggressors.He channeled his anger into his hands. He gathered his chakra into his palm and mowed the remaining enemies down with his Rasengan. He did a final sweep of the area, ensuring that the citizens were safe, before he slipped out of sight into the shadows.
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"Hey, nerd." One of the jocks said, giving Udon a shove."I don't want any trouble." Udon turned away, trying to ignore them. "Hear that boys? He doesn't want any trouble." He turned to two of his friends, who sniggered. "Well, I'll strike a deal with you. We wont give you any, as long as you do our homework. Got it?"Udon tried to walk away, but the leader of the group grabbed him by the shoulder, turning Udon to face him. "I was talking to you." He pushed Udon into the row of lockers. He bounced off and doubled over in pain. Udon closed his eyes as the bully pulled his arm back, loading a punch. He heard the punch connect, but felt no pain. There was someone standing between Udon and the bully, who went pale when he recognized the person he punched."Leave my friend alone." His saviour snarled. "Yes, sir." The bullies chorused as they scattered."Are you okay?" The newcomer turned toward him, spitting out a tooth then brushing the back of his hand against his mouth."Honorable Grandson." Udon winced as he bowed. "Sorry for dragging you into my drama.""Don't worry about it." The boy grinned at Udon, gap toothed. "And if we are going to be friends, call me Konohamaru." "I'm Udon.""Nice to meet ya."
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A slash to the throat took down the last of the enemies. Udon allowed himself to collapse, taking a seat on a nearby log to catch his breath. A simple job my ass. He spent what felt like hours cutting his way through the unending crowd of enemies, but for every one he cut down another took it's place. Adrenaline allowed him to ignore the wounds while fighting, but now there was sharp pains everywhere. Moegi rushed over to him and started attacking a deep slice on his arm with bandages. Ebisu made his way over to them. "Where is Konohamaru?" "Shit." Panic cut through Udon as his instincts took him to the place he last saw Konohamaru. Shit, shit, shit. ------------------------------------------ In the clearing, enemy bodies littered the ground haphazardly, and blood was splashed around in deep puddles. Kneeling in the middle of a summoning circle was Konohamaru. Udon allowed himself to relax a bit. Konohamaru looked half-crazed as he muttered to himself, frantically drawing a sigil in blood, but at least he was alive. He didn't seem to notice as Udon approached. "Kono?" He spoke carefully, in a low voice. He remained painfully concentrated on drawing the circle. Frowning, Udon knelt him and assessed his partner. His uniform was covered in blood. It was impossible to tell how much of it was his. "Konohamaru." He repeated more desperately, failing to hide his panic. Finally, his voice reached him. Konohamaru looked up at him, blue eyes dark and anguished. A bruise was forming around his eye and blood was dripping from an obviously broken nose. "I k-killed him." Konohamaru's voice cracked as he let out a choked sob, chest heaving as he struggled to catch his breath. "You're okay." Udon reached out and grabbed Konohamaru's shoulder, pulling him close to his chest. Konohamaru broke. His body slumped, the fight drained from him. "Breathe.""He died." Konohamaru took in a shaky, uneven breath. His hands were clenching Udon's shirt in a death grip. "He died, and it's my fault. I knew he's too old to fight, but I summoned him anyway." "No." Udon crushed him closer. "He could have ignored you. It's not all on you. You-"He was cut off when he spotted movement to his flank. A body on the ground was reaching for a weapon. Udon threw a kunai and watched as it plunged into the enemy's chest. He snapped around, double checking the rest of the enemy bodies for signs of life. A bush to his blind side rustled. He whipped out another kunai. "Stay back." He yelled, tightening his grip. "Easy." Ebisu held his hand up as he emerged from the brush with Moegi on his heels. "It's us."Udon blinked a few times and then lowered the knife as the battle fog lifted. Once Udon was no longer a threat, Ebisu rushed over, and started obsessing over his young charge. "Can you walk?" He asked, helping Konohamaru to his feet. He swayed for a second, but steadied himself. Ebisu nodded to Moegi and Udon. "Move out. Let's get out of here."