Archive of Our Own

Work Text

The letters were missing.
“Hey, mum?” Harry called, swallowing down panic, he should have torn them up before he fell asleep like he'd planned. 
“Yes honey? ”
“Were you in my room today? ”
Anne glanced up from the book she was reading. “I took out your bin before the truck came, why? ”
Harry’s hand clenched around the strap of his backpack.
“Did you see a couple of letters on the edge of my desk? ”
“Oh, yeah. ” Anne said turning back to her book. “I mailed them. ”
The world dropped out from under Harry’s feet.
“You…mailed them. ”
Anne hummed. “I assumed you ran out of postage.”“Okay, that's, okay. I’m gonna go…drown myself in the shower now. ”
“Should I not have mailed them? ” Anne asked, setting down her book with a frown.
“I hadn’t planned on it, no.” Harry said with forced lightness.
“Oh, honey I’m so sorry.”
Harry smiled tightly, backtracking to kiss her cheek. “It’s okay mum, it’s not the end of the world.”
It was the end of the world  Harry thought as he ran over multiple scenarios in the shower and short of a miracle he was totally and completely screwed. The next week passed without incident, he went to classes, spread his homework out at the diner, went to the movies with Niall and Hailee, normal things.One of the letters had been sent back due to a spelling error in the address (and thank god, the lifeguard at the camp he’d spent a summer at didn’t need to know he’d been one of the main reasons twelve year old Harry had questioned his sexuality) in fact he’s almost managed to forget about the letters.Until everything came crumbling down during gym class.It was the last class of the day and he was doing laps, Niall having skipped out the moment the coach turned his back- probably to go make out with Hailee behind the showers- the soccer team had already taken over the center field.He was minding his business, jogging laps like a good student watching out for stray balls, when Louis broke away from the team and jogged towards him.“Hey, Styles!”Harry slowed down, slightly confused. He and Louis had been friendly until a few years ago when highschool hierarchy kicked in and Louis became one of the popular kids and Harry... did not.He was also Harry’s first kiss. And the subject of an intense crush.Oh fuck.Harry willed the ground to open up and swallow him as Louis pulled a envelope out of his back pocket.“What’s, uh, up? ”“I just wanted to apologize, for ruining you for all other men and,”  to Harry’s horror he unfolded the letter to consult. “Ah yes, and for my ego seeming as big as you imagine my co-”“Okay! ” Harry said cutting him off, cheeks aflame.“I get it!”“I'm just curious.” Louis said with a devilish grin. “As to why you sent this to me. ”“It’s ages old.” Harry said rubbing the back of his neck, willing the coach to call Louis out for not participating in the skirmishes.“Oh really?” Louis asked, eyebrows raising."I mean I was high when I wrote it I don’t even remember what's in it." Harry forced a chuckle."You were high. ” Louis said dryly.Fuck. He had been the one to convince Harry to take his first bowl hit a few years ago.“On cough syrup.” Harry clarified a beat too late. “You know how it is when you’re sick. ”“Yeah, I get that. ” Louis said, thankfully letting him get away with it. “I guess you’d want to read it then? Since you don’t remember.”Harry all but snatched it out of his hand.“Thanks” he said softly, willing his eyes not to tear up in embarrassment.“I’m glad we can laugh about it.” Louis said starting to back away.“And forget. ” Harry nodded.Louis laughed. “I’m not forgetting anything Styles, the paragraph about my ass is poetry.”Harry groaned and turned away, intending to steal Niall lighter and burn the letter in the showers, only to find Liam striding towards him with purpose. Liam had been Harry’s next door neighbor for three years now, a year older but finishing up school after his mother took him out to travel for a year before they moved in next door to Harry and his family, Gemma called Liam’s mother flighty and their mum cuffed her ear and said she was just free spirited.He was kind, warm and treated Harry like his best friend hours after meeting, he still is one of Harry’s best friends despite running with a different crowd during school hours.Rarely would he ever say no to helping someone, and during the summer he spent hours mowing lawns or yard work for mothers around the block while the rest of his time was spent working out in the backyard, usually shirtless.That’s where the trouble started, objectively Liam was attractive and for fifteen year old Harry watching an attractive man work out in the backyard was a lot for him to handle and it might have led to a little crush.A huge infatuation. That spanned over a year and a half.That Harry tried everything to get over, until two years ago when he just walked over, asking if he could join him during his workouts, figuring either he’d desensitize himself to him or Liam would fall madly in love with him.Liam, of course, agreed only after making sure baby faced Harry wasn't trying to change himself because he was perfect just the way he was. The more time spent together the more Harry's crush faded, and the more he realized they never had the dynamic for anything other than friendship and Harry was fine with that, he wrote his letter and moved on.The very letter Liam had in his hand as he walked towards Harry, a pinched look on his face.oh, shit.Harry took a step backwards and panicked."Louis?" he called without thinking. He distantly heard Louis respond before turning around and closing the few feet between them and jumping into Louis' arms, wrapping his arms around his neck and his legs around his waist and kissing him full on the mouth.Louis made a noise of surprise but to his credit played along, wrapping one arm around the back of his thighs and the other around the small of his back.They stayed that way until the coach started shouting at them to take it off the field while a few of Louis’ teammates wolf whistled.“I’m so sorry, I have an explanation.” Harry said the second they separated, Louis dropping his thighs but keeping the arm around his back until he was sure Harry was steady on his feet.“Have you?” Louis asked, clearing his throat and looking away. “I gotta finish practice.”“Can I buy you a milkshake at the diner? ” Harry asked.Louis nodded. “Chocolate. I’ll see you later. ”He turned on his heel and jogged the rest of the way to the rest of his team, shoving the ones that ruffled his hair.Harry glanced around and thankfully, Liam was gone.  “So let me get this right. ” Louis said stealing yet another fry off Harry’s plate and dipping it into his shake. “You wrote and addressed bunch of letters to people you had serious crushes on. First; why? ”Harry sighed, shaking the ice in his glass. “I read somewhere it was a good way to work out your feelings for people, you’re supposed to destroy the letters right after addressing them but apparently I’m a masochist.”Louis nodded, “That’s why the end of the letter was you trash talking me?”Harry felt his ears heat up. “You weren’t ever supposed to see it but yeah, I was really annoyed with you when I wrote it, pretty therapeutic actually.”Louis nodded, the only thing keeping Harry from melting under the table in embarrassment was the fact Louis was taking it all in stride, keeping the conversation light and sounding genuinely curious and not judgemental.“How many were there?”“Five. ”“Five? Okay now I gotta know who.”Harry stole his milkshake, sticking his own straw in it and slurping.“A lifeguard at the camp I went to when I was twelve, the student coach from two years ago, Max from my chemistry class last year, my neighbor and you, Obviously.”“Why me and did you trash talk them too or am I special?” Louis asked, stealing his shake back.Harry fidgeted. “I told you you were never supposed to see it. You were my first kiss. ”Louis snapped his fingers, pointing at him. “No I wasn’t. ”“I think I remember.” Harry said dryly, smacking his hand away from his fries.Louis grabbed one anyway, shoving it in his mouth triumphantly.“I wasn’t, I know for a fact you kissed Abbey Summers two weeks before we kissed, my sisters were friends with her and my god if tween girls aren’t gossips. ”Harry stabbed the cherry out of Louis shake with his straw.  “My first boy kiss, duh. ”Louis nodded in consideration. “Really? ”Harry rolled his eyes.“That doesn’t explain why you were so pissed at me in the letter, was it that traumatic? ”“Of course not. ” Harry said tearing up his napkin. “The kiss was fine, the week after is what pissed me off. ”Louis frowned.“I’m ashamed of it now but we kissed and it was like, monumental to me and the next week you just, like, ignored me completely. Just made me feel really bad and it turned into anger at you. ”“Harry. ” Louis said softly. “I’m so sorry, I never even thought of that. ”Harry shrugged. “I’m over it now, it was stupid really.”Louis leveled him with a look. “Your feelings were perfectly understandable.”Harry rolled his eyes.“I mean it, I’ll have to make it up to you somehow and then you’ll have to forgive me, works with my sisters.”Harry huffed out a laugh, shaking his head.Louis smiled, sucking the last dregs of his milkshake up. “Back to the original subject. What was all that today?”Harry sighed, scooping up a spoonful of his ice and crunching down.“Liam got the letter, he’s the sweetest person and a great friend and I don’t want things to be weird between us.”“So you jumped me. ”“It was on the fly thinking sorry, I never should have done that. ”Louis waved him off. “What’d he do to get a Styles crush? ”Harry felt his ears go red again. “He would workout in his backyard, shirtless. ”Louis snorted. “That’s all? So easy Styles. ”Harry kicked him under the table. “It was a lot for me when I was fifteen. ”“I’m only teasing. ” Louie said kicking him back. “So what are you gonna do now? ”“Try and avoid him, I guess. ”“Aren’t you neighbors? ”“I never said I’d be successful.”  Liam was waiting on his front porch steps when Harry finally arrived home.

“Hey, Harry. ” Liam called climbing to his feet.

Harry aborted trying to slip around the back with a soft curse. “Oh hey, Li. ”

“We should talk.ĺ  Liam said pulling the envelope out of his pocket and showing it to him.

“Oh that ” Harry forced a chuckle. “That was such a silly thing, I’m sorry you had to read that nonsense.”

“Is it true then?” Liam asked and this is why Harry never wanted him to know the look on his face, he was pitying Harry for his stupid crush, pitying him because Harry was just his stupid younger neighbor.

“Don’t worry about it. ” Harry said firmly. “It was silly when I wrote it and it’s more now.”

“So it is true?”

“Was. ” Harry corrected, “Honestly you really don’t have to worry about it, it was such a fleeting thing and I’m crazy about somebody now. ”

“Yeah? ” Liam asked, sounding relieved and cracking a smile. “Who? ”

“Louis. ”

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Liam’s eyebrows shot to his hairline. “Tomlinson? ”

“Yeah.”  Harry cringed internally. “It’s been pretty, uh, sudden but he's incredible.”

“Well, congrats then. ” Liam said patting him on the shoulder. “I’m sorry I did anything to make you feel like you did, it wasn’t purposeful.”

Harry laughed. “I know, Liam, thanks for understanding.”

Liam beamed at him and held out the letter. “We can forget all about this If you want? ”

“I really, really want to. ” Harry said clutching the letter to his chest.

Liam backed away towards his house. “Hey and let me know how things go with you and Tomlinson, you make a good couple! See you around. ”Fuck. *** Louis cornered him in the bathroom, steering him into a stall.

“Guess who just apologized to me? ” he said foregoing a greeting.

“Uh, who? ” Harry asked steadying himself against the wall to keep from falling into the toilet.

“Liam Payne, guess what he apologized for?” he didn’t wait for Harry to respond. “He apologized to me for your developing a crush on him three years ago because you told him your crazy about me and he felt guilty for keeping us apart. Harry. ”

Harry scratched the back of his neck. “Sorry?”

“Harry. ” Louis said exasperated. “He apologized for your crush! ”

“I told you! He’s too sweet for this world.”

Louis sighed rubbing a hand over his face. “You reckon he would have pity dated you?”

“Yeah I do.” Harry said miserably. “And he probably would have enjoyed it.”

Louis let out a long breath. “You've got quite the mess Styles. ”

“Yeah. Don’t worry about it I’ll figure it out…. Maybe.”  “We could do it.”  Louis said the next morning, leaning against Harry’s locker.

“Do what.” Harry asked, shoving books inside.

“Fake it.”

Harry snorted. “Like that would work.”

“Why wouldn’t it? ” Louis sounded defensive.

“We’ve got hardly anything in common anymore. ” Harry said, slinging his backpack over his shoulder again. “We were barely friends back in the day and besides I’ve never had a boyfriend, it’s easier to just make it up as I go. ”

“You’ve never-” Louis started cutting off and following him down the hall. “Did you say it’s easier to make it up? ”

Harry nodded, slowing his pace. “Obviously then I don’t have to iron out details or whatever, I have a plan.”

Louis shook his head. “Alright, suit yourself if you change your mind, you know where I live. "

After a day of of people shooting him thumbs up when they passed in the hall and Niall texting him date suggestions Harry was seriously doubting his plan.

“Kinda insulted you didn’t say anything, like the moment it happened” Hailee said from Niall back where she perched after demanded a piggyback ride as they made their way to their usual lunch tree.“Like I know remember calling you from my closet after we went out. ”

“It’s not serious.” Harry protested wearily.

“That’s not what Louis says. ” Niall said, dropping to the ground and leaning against Hailee. “He sounds really taken with you from what I overheard in Chem. ”

Harry’s cheeks warmed. “There’s nothing even going on really. ”

“Bullshit. ” Hailee said throwing a baby carrot at him. “Perrie told Jade, who told Charlie, who I overheard telling Liam that you two were at the diner for hours yesterday sharing a shake and fries.”

“Louis doesn’t share his shakes H, first thing you learned when I was on the team before my knee went to hell."

“That’s ridiculous.” Harry said, before they stopped being friends he and Louis and always picked off each others plates.

“Just tellin’ you how it is. ” Niall shrugged, passing his iced tea back to Hailee. After school Harry found himself sitting on the steps of Louis house, his sisters old bike leaning against the railings, the tassels on the handlebars fluttering in the cool wind.

He was focusing on his homework and missed Louis car pulling up, startling when his shadow passed over him.

“Oh, hey. ”

“What do I owe the pleasure? ” Louis said, shrugging off his backpack and sitting down next to him.

Harry shook his head and snapped the book he had open shut and started shoving to things in his bag rapidly.

This was a stupid idea.

“Nevermind. ”

“Hey, woah, slow down. ” Louis said grasping his wrist lightly. “What’s going on?”

“You talked about me during Chem.” Harry bit his lip. “Everyone believes it. ”

“Isn’t that what you wanted? ”

“I guess.” Harry said miserably, burying his face in his hands. “I didn’t expect it to work. ”

Louis laughed lightly.

“People are going to have expectations.”

Louis nodded, “I don’t mind talking it up. ”

“I don’t want to drag you into it. ”

“Kinda already did though . ”

Harry bit his lip, willing his eyes not to well up.

“I'm sorry.” he said thickly. “I’m so stupid.”

“Woah, Harry, come on now, you’re not stupid you’re one of the smartest in our grade. It’s not even that big of a deal did you forget I’m the one that offered to fake it?”

“That’s because you’re a nice person. ” Harry said wiping his eyes.

“Oh I'm not cock centric anymore? ”

Harry laughed. “You never were.”

“Thanks. ” Louis said surprisingly soft.

“I mean it. ” Harry said. “I talked a lot of shit in that letter, and most of it wasn’t true. ”

Louis cleared his throat and scratched the backing his neck. And… was he blushing?

“Anyway, what’s the game plan? ”

“You’re still willing? ”

“Duh. ” Louis said tugging on one of Harry’s rouge curls. “Think of it as a senior prank for the whole school. ”

Harry nodded slowly, “I think I can deal with that. ”

Louis grinned.

“Let’s make a list. ” Harry suggested after a few moments of talking. “Of ground rules and the things we’re willing to do.”

“Like a contract? ” Louis said leaning back on his elbows.

“Yeah.” Harry said scrawling that at the top of a page in his notebook. “One: no snitching, we can’t tell anybody it’s fake. ”

“Duh. ” Louis said again. “First rule of fight club. ”

“I fell asleep during that one but I’m assuming it’s not talking about fight club. ”

“God ” Louis groaned dropping into his back. “Rule two: you have to watch fight club with me. ”

“I grew up with my mom and sister what do you expect? but fine, then you have to watch the Notebook with me”

“I have a house full of little sisters what’s your point, but fine we’ll double feature it, I like that one. ”

“Next. “ Harry said "No more kissing. ”

“You kissed me first in case you forgot.”

“I know, but no more okay? ”

“Alright, but what’s your issue with kissing? ”

Harry shifted. “I don’t what all my boyfriend firsts to be fake.”

“Fine.” Louis said flatly.“What else? ”

“You have to come to a few of my games, there's not many left but anyone I'm supposed to be seeing would definitely come to a few.”

“That’s fine. ” Harry said writing it down. “I like watching, you’ve all got nice shorts. ”

“I can drive you to school most days. ” Louis suggested. “You’re only a street over so it’s not out of the way, it’ll be early Wednesdays and Fridays though, because of practice.”

“I’m fine with that, better than taking the bus. I’ll give you gas money.”

Louis shook his head, “You don’t need to.”

“I have to pay you back somehow. ” Harry said. “You’re not getting anything out of this. ”

Louis sat up and stared at him. “Not getting anything - actually you know what? I didn’t say anything before but. ”

“But?” Harry prompted.

“But. ” Louis said looking away and sighing. “My ex won’t give up on getting back together, being with someone else will like, close that door or whatever. ”

“I didn’t know you had a recent ex. ”

Louis shrugged, picking at a hole in his jeans. “It wasn’t serious. Point is don’t worry about paying me back for this. ”

“If you’re sure. ” Harry said. “But I’ll pay for myself if we go anywhere. ”

Louis shook his head, hiding a smile in his shoulder. “Deal, speaking of which you have to come on the ski trip. ”

“What ski trip?”

“The weekend one seniors go on every year, where have you been?”

“Uh not a senior. Besides I don’t run with your crowd”

Louis rolled his eyes. “‘My crowd’, high school is stupid.”

“Agree on that. ” Harry said scrolling his phone. “It’s a week before Christmas? That’s three months away, you really think we’ll be doing this that long?”

Louis shrugged, “Our whole grade stuck on a bus for three hours, what better place to have a dramatic reveal? ”

“I guess. ” Harry said. “But we could end it sooner if we need to, right?”

“Of course,” Louis said leaning back again, how he found laying in the hard porch comfortable Harry wasn’t sure. “How about PDA? ”

“None. ” Harry said doodling a snowflake next to the ski trip.

“None? ” Louis said turning his face towards him. “You know I’m a tactile person, do you really think people will believe this if I don’t ever touch you?”

Harry hummed, rolling his bottom lip between his fingers. “I’m not sure, though.”

“What if…we just do what feels natural for us both and find a middle place? ”

“I think…. that would be okay. ” Harry said slowly.

“We'll find a balance.”

“What if I watched your practice some days?” Harry asked shyly, thinking back to when Niall would drag him along to watch Hailee's dance practices.

He’s such a good third wheel.

“It’s boring. ” Louis said. “But yeah, if you want that would be cool, I’ll drive you home those days. ”
“Cool. ” Harry said scribbling it down. “Can you think of anything else? ”
“Nah, you? ”
Harry shook his head. “Should we sign it? ”
Louis rolled his eyes but grabbed a pen and scrawled his name along the bottom.“There. ” Harry said setting down his own pen. “It’s done.”
“We’re officially fake boyfriends. ” Louis said, attempting to keep a straight face.
Harry laughed and finished packing up his stuff. “See you tomorrow, then.”He startled when Louis pressed a quick kiss to his cheek.
“That okay? ” he murmured.Harry nodded.Louis grinned at him, picking up his own bag and slinging it over his shoulder. “Don’t overthink it. " Harry was sitting on his front porch steps when Louis pulled up.“Hi. ” he said, climbing in and shoving his backpack down by his feet.Louis grunted in response, staring hard at the wheel before shaking his head and putting the car back in gear.“Not a morning person? ”“I’m not a person before nine am. ” Louis said.Harry smiled and held out a to-go cup.“ Try this. ”Louis looked at it sideways, taking it as he stopped at an intersection.“Coffee? ” he said taking a sip and making to hand it back to him.Harry shook his head. “It’s for you. I already had two cups.”“No wonder you’re so bright eyed and bushy tailed. ” Louis said shaking his head, he held up the cup, “ Thank you by the way.”“No problem.” Harry said settling back into his seat.Harry started fidgeting the closer they got to school.“It’ll be fine.” Louis said as he pulled into the parking lot. “Just act normally, nothing's different.”“We’re lying to the whole school. ” Harry said.Louis’ cough sounded suspiciously like a laugh as he pulled into a parking space. “I highly doubt the whole school cares.”“It feels like it! ” Harry said shrilly.Louis shook his head, not bothering to hide his smile as he turned off the car.“What if people find out? "Harry continued, unbuckling his seatbelt and clamoring out of the car. "What if it goes on our permanent records?”“Chill out curly. ” Louis said over the top of the car.“What if future employers hear about it? We’ll never be able to start careers, oh my god I’m going to end up living in my mum's basement, grandmum will disinherited me, I’ve let her down I’ve let my whole family- What are you doing? ”Louis had taken his bag out of his hand, dropped it on the ground and crowded Harry against the side of the car.“Chill out. ” he whispered, face close to Harry’s. “The school doesn’t care, I promise.”“You really think so? ” Louis hands had slipped down to rest on Harry’s hips“If anything it’ll be good entertainment.”“Well that’s... comforting”Louis laughed softly, this close Harry could see the way his eyes crinkled.“If worst comes to worst we’ll both go into theater put it on our rèsumés, ask the teachers for letters of support, yeah?”Harry smiled, despite himself“We’ll ask Mr. Rowland first. ”That made Harry laugh. “I’m sure he’d write a glowing review.”Louis stepped away, dropping his hands from Harry’s hips.“Yeah they were decent actors, but honestly I’m just glad to be rid of them. ” Louis said in a monotone, making Harry laugh harder.He grabbed his bag and slung it over his shoulder, watching as Louis did the same.“Thanks. ” he said. “I was being a little dramatic.”“Just a little. ” Louis said with a grin.They walked in shoulders bumping, Louis stopped him halfway to his locker with a tug to his belt loop.He stepped in close again and Harry could smell his cologne. “See you at lunch.”“You’re gonna eat with us? ” Harry asked surprised.Louis shrugged. “I figured I would, if you don’t want me to-”“No it’s fine, just surprised, it’s not in the contract.”Louis rolled his eyes with a smile. “That’s what I meant when I said don’t overthink it. ”The warning bell rang and the bustle in the hall doubled.Harry was aware of how many people were milling around in the hall, sending them covert glances and whispering, he leaned in and pressed his lips quickly to Louis cheek.Turning away before he got a look at Louis face to find his locker, feeling his own face heating up. Harry found Louis sitting next to Niall and Hailee under their tree.
“Hey. ” he said dropping down across from them.
Louis tapped the toe of his shoe to Harry’s. “Hey. Hailee’s been trying to convince me the four of us should go on a double date.”
Harry looked up sharply from where he was pulling his lunch out of his bag.“Oh? ”“It’ll be fun!” she insisted. “Right Ni? ”
“Totally. ”
“You’re just saying that, ‘cause it’s Hailee’s idea. ”
“You can prove nothing.” Niall said leaning back against the tree.
“Please Harry? ” Hailee asked pouting and batting her eyelashes. “Louis says it’s up to you.”
Harry glanced at Louis, he shrugged slightly leaning forward to steal one of Harry’s carrot sticks.
“It’ll be fun,” Hailee said again.
“Alright,” Harry said. “Nothing weird though, I know what you two do for fun. ”
“We have perfectly normal fun. ” Niall said.“Some of it’s weird. ” Hailee agreed. “The cabbage festival was weird. ”“But delicious.” Niall argued.“Well… ”Niall choked on his drink. “You said you have fun! ”“It was sort of fun -but I smelled like sauerkraut for days.”“I didn’t know there was such a thing.” Louis said before Niall could reply. “Is there like a newsletter of obscure festivals?" “I can’t believe you agreed, Hailee is going to take you apart. ” Harry said quietly as they walked to class.Louis shrugged. “I’ll be fine, would have been weird to refuse seeing they’re your best friends. ”“I can make up an excuse. ” Harry said. “I know that’s not part of the-”“Don’t says its not in the contract.” Louis warned, opening the door. “We agreed to not over think it remember.”“I guess. ”“Look at it this way; if we can fool your best friends we’re pretty much home free. ”***Louis pulled up in a minivan the next morning.“I’m so sorry. ” He said rolling down the window as Harry walked up. “I have to drop off my sisters at school it was a last minute thing or I would’ve let you know so you could catch the bus. ”“It’s alright, I don’t mind. ” Harry said, dropping his voice. “Unless you don’t want me around your sisters?”“God no. That’s not it I just wasn’t sure if you minded showing up in an ancient mini. ”“I wouldn’t say ancient.” Harry said climbing in the front seat. “It’s roomy. ”“Louuuuu, I’m gonna be late. ”Louis rolled his eyes. “You’re not gonna be late.”Harry handed over the usual to-go cup.“You’re the best, thanks love. ” Louis said taking a gulp before putting the car back in gear.Harry felt his ears go red at the name, turning to wave at the back. “Hi. ”Four girls chorus it back.“Who are you anyway? ” one twin asked.“Don’t be rude.” Louis said looking in the rearview mirror.She pursed her lips turning to look out the window.“I’m Harry. ” he said anyway. “Nice to meet you all. ”“I’m Lottie.” the one sitting behind him said with a smile.Louis sighed. “The twins are Daisy and Phoebe, they’re thirteen don’t mind their attitudes and the one in the back is Fizzy. ”She waved and turned back to her phone.“You didn’t answer.” the other twin said after her sister nudged her in the ribs.“He’s a friend of mine.” Louis said shortly.“You don’t call your friends ‘love’. ” Lottie said idly, checking her makeup.“He’s a friend of mine. ” Louis repeated.“He means he’s his boyfriend.” Fizzy said from the back.“I didn’t say that. ” Louis sighed. “I can’t give a friend a ride to school? ”“You called him ‘love’. ”“I call loads of people ‘love’. I call you lot ‘love’.”“We're related it doesn't count. ”“Anyway,”  Louis said loudly, pulling up in front of the school. “Everybody out.”The girls piled out.“Bye Louis’ boyfriend!” the twins yelled before darting off.“Sorry about them.”“It’s alright, they seem fun.”“Fun is a word you could use.” Louis said before pointedly changing the subject. “Hey, how long have Niall and Hailee been together?”“About a year, why?”Louis shrugged, “Just curious, they seem like a good fit.”“They’re ridiculous, actually, worst people I know.”Louis smiled. “Were you all friends before?”“Nah.” Harry said playing with the window toggle. “She was Niall’s friend, Niall actually had a huge crush on her for ages but she was seeing somebody else.”“How did they happen?”Harry shrugged, “She and the guy broke up and they got closer, they probably would have gotten together sooner but Niall didn’t want to overstep and she wasn’t sure if he was into her or not, I had to dine and drop to get them to have dinner alone.”Louis laughed. “Matchmaker, huh?”“More like ‘stop whining to me about each other’.”“You’re a good friend.”Harry shrugged.“Are they super serious? Like what are the plans for next year?”“They’re planning on trying to find a place to split rent with a couple roommates and try living together, they keep trying to rope me in but, I dunno.”“Why not?”Harry sighed. “I got accepted to the same school but I haven’t heard back from my goal school yet, it was a long shot and it’s across the country.”“I see.”“It’s stupid but.” he shrugged, “I also don’t know if we could afford it just the three of us.”“It’s not stupid, it’s good to have ambition.” Louis said pulling into the parking lot. “If things do work out I might take their offer, otherwise I’d have a two hour commute everyday.”“They’ll be thrilled.”
“You think they’ll make it? Together I mean?” Louis asked putting the car in park.“I think so.” Harry said slowly. “They’re best friends first and  they’ve seen each others best and worst, they think the other hung the stars.”“That’s good,” Louis said softly, watching as Harry collected his bag from the floor. “Oh, wait!”Harry turned towards him and he immediately dug his hands into Harry’s hair, fluffing it up and pulling it into his face.“Uh, whatcha doing?”Louis hushed him and pulled out his phone, leaning back and snapping a picture. “See.”Harry drug his hands through his hair and peered at the picture. His hair was every which way, curls hanging in his face and a small pout on his lips.“I noticed Hailee had Niall as her lockscreen yesterday.”“Oh, good idea, I never thought of that.”Louis winked and climbed out of the car. After settling into class Harry quietly  pulled his phone out and changed his own lockscreen to the sneaky picture of Louis he’d taken while he was driving the other day. ***“Normal enough for you?” Hailee asked smugly, snuggling into Niall's side as they left the theater.“I’m pleasantly surprised, I’ll admit.” Harry said. “Lou?”Louis smiled, bumping their elbows together. “That movie was a little weird but aside a normal night.”“If I get sick from that sushi you’re gonna have to nurse me  back to health, you know that.” Niall said squeezing Hailee.She rolled her eyes. “You’re not gonna get sick.”She had of course grilled Louis over dinner, roping Niall in a few times when she caught Harry trying to convince her to back off, but Louis had rolled with it, lies falling smoothly sprinkled with truths.Harry felt bad for the lies but when Louis had brought up the letter- making it sound like there was only one, Harry was incredibly thankful even as he felt his cheeks turn red.“Ooh! a booth, c’mon.” Hailee said dragging Niall towards the photobooth outside an arcade, “Do you guys want to go first?”“You go ahead,” Louis said turning to face Harry. “We’re going to have to go in there aren’t we?”“Yeah, “ Harry said, tugging his hood up. “Thanks for tonight, she really went after you.”“I told you I could handle it.” Louis said, stepping close enough to match up the toes of their shoes.“And thanks about the letters, I really don’t need them to know about the others- well other one.”“Only Liam?”“Yeah the others got returned, thank god.”“That’s good.”“Lucky.” Harry said. “How’re things with your ex?”“My?- oh good, yeah, good, haven’t uh, heard from them in a while so.”“It’s working, that’s great.” Harry said with a smile, genuinely pleased.“Yeah,” Louis said looking down at his shoes.“We’re coming out.” Hailee called.Harry rolled his eyes, taking his hands out of his jacket pockets and reaching for the strip of pictures Niall had.“These are cute.”“Duh, we’re adorable.” Niall said taking the pictures back and slipping it into his wallet. “We’re gonna get a coffee while you’re in there.”“Meet you back here.” Hailee said throwing an arm around Niall’s shoulders, he automatically slouched to her height.Louis nodded towards the booth and for some reason Harry’s stomach filled with butterflies, flipping his hood back down he followed Louis, slipping in after him and grumbling as Louis fed the machine and pressed the button.The screen counted down and they made silly faces, a soft pop autoible before the screen started counting down again, Harry stuck his hand behind Louis’ head making bunny ears seeing Louis do the same out of the corner of his eye, when the screen started counting down for the third time Harry turned his face intending to copy Hailee and Niall’s picture, but instead of his lips meeting Louis’ cheek they met his lips.His lips were cool and dry and the butterflies in Harry’s stomach started fluttering in double time, his heart rate speeding up, they didn’t move until the sound of the machine printing startled them.“Sorry.” Harry whispered immediately, putting space between them.“Don’t worry about it.” Louis said searching his face, he swallowed and looked away.Harry nodded and stepped out on shaky legs he glanced around, spotting Niall and Hailee walking along the curb, they hadn’t seen them yet.Harry turned back and Louis was holding out his strip of pictures, eyes downcast on his own strip.“I owe you for paying.” he said, playing with the edge of the paper.Louis rolled his eyes and shoved him away, waving to Niall. “Is that for us?” he called seeing Niall balancing a cardboard caddy.“Yeah, got you your regular H and got you the same cause we didn’t know what you liked.”“Thanks.” Harry said taking the cups and passing one to Louis. “It’s just iced coffee.”“Thank you.” Louis directed at the others.“Lemme see.” Hailee demanded making grabby hands at Harry, he held out the strip silently, biting his straw as Hailee’s face went soft.“These are so sweet.” she cooed showing Niall, something passed over his face before he smoothed it out.“We might have some competition, then.”“Nah,” Hailee said. “Different teams. ”Niall and Louis snorted into their drinks. ***Harry was covered in flour and frustrated when the doorbell rang.“Yes?” he snapped throwing open the door.Louis raised his eyebrows, hands buried deep in the pockets of his hoodie. “I’m guessing you didn’t get my text?”“What text?” Harry asked, turning around. “Close the door behind you please.”Louis followed him into the kitchen. “My text about the party tonight, what are you doing?”“I’m trying to make cupcakes for my mom’s book club meeting tomorrow.”“I see.”“It’s not working very well.”“I see that too.” Louis said swiping his finger in the bowl of batter. “Tastes good though.”“You think?” Harry asked, wiping at a smudge of flour on his forehead.Louis swiped his finger in again. “Yeah, really good actually.”Harry frowned at the bowl another minute before starting to fill the cupcake tin.“Party? Yes, no?”“No.” Harry said scraping the bowl, “I’ve got to skype with my sister tonight.”“What time?”“Usually ten-thirty, why?”“What if I promise to have you home by then?”Harry shook his head, “I’m really not the party type.”“C’mon, it’s just a small one, I promised my friend.”“Are you trying to convince me not to go?” Harry said piling dishes into the sink.“Harry.” Louis whined. “Please?”Harry sighed, drying his hands on a dish towel. “It’s that important to you?”Louis nodded. “I think my ex might be there.”Harry sighed, running a hand through his hair.“I’ll come if,” he waited for Louis’ nod. “You wash these while I get ready and ask my mum.”Louis eyed the dishes in the sink. “Deal.” Harry found Louis spinning in his desk chair when he returned from the shower.“Your mum said I could come up.” he said.Harry nodded and padded over to his dresser, digging around.“I haven’t been in here since you had Harry Potter sheets.”“It was Superman.” Harry said, tugging his boxers up his damp legs before letting the towel drop. “You had spiderman.”“That’s right.” Louis said with a grin. “We would argue about who was better.”Harry chuckled and scrubbed the towel through his hair.“My sisters say doing that makes it frizzy.”“Yeah.” Harry shrugged, “Have you seen my jeans?”Louis wordlessly pulled them out from under himself. Harry rolled his eyes.“You hung it up.” he said, squinting at Harry’s cork board.“Yeah.” Harry said, tugging an old t-shirt out of a drawer. “Niall and Hailee like to invite themselves over.”It wasn’t a total lie, they did frequently come over to study in Harry’s room, but he hadn’t been thinking about that when he finally looked at the pictures after Louis had dropped him off the other night, the butterflies in his stomach coming to life again as he tried to remember putting his hand on Louis’ face or when Louis’ own hand had slipped around to cradle the back of his neck when they’d accidentally kissed.“Right.” Louis said staring hard at the floor. “Good thinking.” Harry’s hair did dry frizzy, he fruitlessly tried to tame it as he followed Louis up the drive to his friends house.“I should just cut it.” Harry said, giving up and shoving his hands into his pockets.“I like it long.” Louis commented, he paused and held out his hand. “C’mon.”Harry held up his own hand and Louis rolled his eyes grabbing his hand and pulling him close.“You want to drink?” he asked as they climbed the steps.“Nah.”“Cool.” Louis said tugging him through the door.“Hey Tommo!” a few people shouted from the crowd in the living room.“Oh thank god, I’m being destroyed at beer pong, help me?” someone from the dining room called, the table covered in plastic cups.“Not tonight.” Louis said. “Gotta drive.”Harry felt himself go red as eyes scanned him from head to toe, before they shrugged and turned away.“See, easy.” Louis said in his ear as he guided him through the house with a hand on his lower back, they found their way to  a couch in the garage, Harry perched on the arm of it and he stuttered when someone walked passed and pressed can of beer into his hand.“You mind if I?” Louis asked nodding towards the can in his hand.Harry held it out wordlessly, Louis popped the tab and took a sip, grimacing at the taste.“Is your ex here?” Harry asked, leaning close to Louis. He would never ask, normally but he was curious about this ex.“I dunno.” Louis said lowly. “I’ll go look if you’re okay here for a second?”Harry nodded and Louis pressed his lips to the top of his head and was gone without another word.“I never thought it was true.” a voice said behind him. “I never thought you of all people would be on his list.”“What?” Harry asked, the guy was clearly drunk, cheeks flushed and an empty red cup clutched in his hand.The guy shook his head. “Fucking wild that Tomlinson would go after you.”“I don’t understand.” Harry said standing up. “What are you talking about? Go after me?”“You never heard of his fuckable list?” the guy laughed.“His what?” a humorless laugh escaped him as his stomach clenched.“His list of all the people he planned to fuck before leaving. Wasn’t long mind you but, still.”“You’re wrong.” Harry said shaking his head, his stomach clenched again.The guy shrugged. “He’s not stupid enough to have shown anyone but he was a busy boy last year.”He winked and Harry felt bile rise in his throat, he shook his head and walked away, squeezing through the crowds.Louis’ sexlife was none of his business and he certainly didn’t have a problem with an active one but the idea that he had a list- oh god was that why he agreed to help Harry so readily? Was he wanting for a time to call in on the favor? Waiting to check one more off?Harry felt genuinely nauseous  by the time he found Louis, talking easily with someone.“I’m leaving.” he said interrupting them, he would feel guilty later but of he didn't leave this house he might genuinely be sick. “I need to leave now. Are you coming?”
Louis looked confused but handed off his full beer and turned towards Harry.“Yeah, of course, are you okay?”“I’m fi- I don’t feel well, I need to go home.”“Okay, okay.” Louis said putting a hand on his back to guide him, Harry felt his stomach roll and side stepped away from him. Louis frowned but didn’t try and touch him again, following him out.Once outside Louis tugged the keys from Harry’s back pocket.
“You’ve been drinking.” Harry said reaching for them.“I had two sips, I’m fine.” Louis said holding on to the keys and trying to catch Harry’s eye. “You look like you’re about to pass out, what happened?”  Harry shook his head and kept his eyes on the ground.“I shouldn't have left you alone in there.” Louis said sounding frustrated.“I’m a big boy I can handle myself.” Harry said stalking towards the car.“I never said you couldn’t.” Louis said trailing after him, he stood on the drivers side and looked over the top of the car. “Harry what happened?”“Please open the door.” Harry said softly, tugging on the handle, willing himself not to cry.Louis frowned but unlocked the doors and climbed in, but made no move to start the car.“Please talk to me.”“Can I please go home?”Louis sighed, ran his hands through his hair and started the car, his knuckles white on the steering wheel.Harry watched him drive, the streetlights tossing his face into shadows and casting it in a sickly green, his lips were pressed in a tight line and he never once looked away from the road.“Is it true?” Harry asked finally.Louis’ gaze darted to Harry for a second. “Is what true?”“That you have a list of people you plan to sleep with before you leave high school.”“What?” Louis asked, taking his eyes off the road as he rolled to a stop at an intersection. “The hell Harry?”“Is it?”“Is it what?”“Is it true? Am I on it? Is that the only reason you’re helping me?”
“Yes I’m only helping you to get in your pants, what the actual fuck Harry? Do you actually believe that?”Harry stayed silent, watching as Louis’ jaw clenched and he rubbed his forehead.“Unbelievable.” Louis muttered. “Who said this?”“I dunno.” Harry said. “Didn’t catch his name.”“Ridiculous.” Louis glanced over at him again. “No, I don’t have a list. I won’t pretend I’m shy about what I’ve done but I’d never do that.”“No?”“No.” Louis said firmly. “You want to know my history? I’ve slept with two people in school, both of whom I dated beforehand, if I wanted something casual I’d go into the city- which I’ve done a few times -less than eight if you want- safe every time. You want to see the papers that say I’m clean? I’ve got them at home in the top drawer of my desk.”“I’m sorry.” Harry said, eyes welling up, angry at himself.Louis watched him a long moment, before sighing and dropping his hand to Harry’s knee.“I’m not angry at you, I’m angry some dickhead is making up rumors - I bet it’s Tom, he’s still pissed at me for telling his girlfriend he was two timing her.”“How did you know he was?” Harry asked, wiping at his eyes.“Wouldn’t shut up about it in the locker room, I told him it was disgusting and she deserved better. His response was a few choice slurs, but I couldn’t let it go.”“Your sisters?”Louis shrugged, “Yeah and I’d like to think I’m a decent person.”“You are a good person.” Harry said softly. “I’m sorry I made you say all that.”
Louis shook his head, “Don’t be, I told you I’m not shy about it.”They were quiet,  listening to the distant traffic.“Milkshakes?” Harry suggested. “My treat.”Louis smiled and put the car back into gear, taking a left instead of a right towards Harry’s house.“I’ve kissed four people.” Harry said.“Oh yeah?” Louis asked, his posture much looser now. “Including me?”“Yeah.” Harry said, picking at a loose thread in his shirt. “Sad isn’t it?”“Why would it be sad?”Harry snorted. “I’m almost nineteen, I’ve kissed four people and the only boyfriend I’ve ever had is fake. It’s sad Louis.”“It’s not sad,” Louis said firmly. “There’s nothing that says you have to do a certain number of things by eighteen.”“Except the fact that literally everyone else has.”“No.” Louis said, stopping at a light. “That’s bullshit and you know it. I’m not more mature because of the things I've done and you're not less because you haven’t done them. Everyone does things at their own rate, you’ll do all those things and more when you're ready to not when everyone else thinks you should.”Louis was watching him so intensely and Harry couldn’t break eye contact no matter how much it made him squirm, luckily a horn beep behind them and Louis turned back to the road.The diner was mostly empty when they arrived and the moment they stepped in front of the car together Harry wrapped his arms around Louis, cutting him off mid sentence, as always he took it in stride, wrapping his own arms around him and swaying them slightly.“Thank you.” Harry whispered.“I didn’t say anything that wasn’t true.” Louis said. “Can we go in now I’m freezing.”Harry laughed and let go, tugging him close to his side as they took the few steps to the front door. “So, how come you haven’t had a boyfriend?” Louis asked when he was half through his milkshake, picking at Harry’s fries again.“I dunno.” Harry said stealing the shake and stirring it. “Nobody likes me that way ?”“Bullshit.” Louis said.Harry shrugged and Louis rolled his eyes at him.“It’s kinda scary, like the idea of being with someone and them knowing so much about you and then they could just leave like it doesn't matter.”“You’re not scared to be with me.” Louis pointed out.“Well no.” Harry said, sliding the milkshake back towards him and leaning back in his chair. “This is fake, there’s nothing to be scared of.”Louis looked away. “Yeah, of course.” “I’m home.” Harry called when they arrived with an hour to spare.“Hi honey I wasn’t expecting you until later, party boring?” his mother asked, coming out of the living room wrapped in a robe and holding a glass of wine.“Yeah,” Louis answered, “We bailed and got something to eat instead.”She smiled. “Well at least you two had fun.”“I’m going to give Louis a few cupcakes for his sisters if it’s alright?”“Of course sweetie. Oh wait I have a tray- I’ll pack them up while you say good night.”Harry turned to face Louis. “She’s watching us isn’t she?” Louis chuckled, glancing over his shoulder . “Good guess.”“She was so excited when Niall mentioned you, kept telling me she was proud of me.”“Mothers are like that.” Louis said, flicking his hair off his face. “It was fun, the milkshakes.”“It was, my dramatics - not so much.”“You weren’t that dramatic.” he laughed at Harry’s raised eyebrows. “Okay maybe a little dramatic but so was I.”“Just so we’re honest.” Harry said, he could hear the tap running in the kitchen.“Should I kiss you?” Louis asked suddenly. “Like, goodnight? I know you don’t want- nevermind.”He looked so flustered, cheeks pink and bottom lip between his teeth, it made Harry’s stomach flip over.“I think that would be okay.” he whispered.Louis’ eyes brightened . “Yeah?”“Yeah.” Harry laughed and Louis put his hand to his cheek and kissed him, it was barely a brush of lips and Harry leaned in again automatically pressing their lips together, Louis’ other hand found its way to his hip and squeezed it slightly before pulling back.He gave him a soft smile before turning away to take the tray from Anne who had appeared silently.“Put an extra in for your mum.”“She’ll love that, thank you.” Louis said with a smile. “I better head home, thank you for the cupcakes. See you at school.”“Drive safe.” Harry said following him to the door.“Do you want me to tell you when I get home?”“Would you?” Harry asked quickly.Louis laughed. “For you I will curly.” The text came as Harry was wrapping up skype with his sister.“Who is texting you so late at night?” she demanded, leaning forward as though she would be able to see his phone across an ocean and through the computer. “Is it a boy?”“It is, but he’s a friend.” and suddenly Harry was telling her everything from the letters to not wanting Liam’s pity ( Liam? next door Liam? Oh my god Harry he referred to you as little brother for the longest time) to faking it all with Louis.Her eyebrows crept towards her hairline but she didn’t say anything.“Tell me I’m being stupid.” Harry sighed.Gemma shrugged. “You could do worse, Louis’ sweet from what I remember.”“You don’t think this’ll bite me in the ass?”“Oh, of course it will.” she said airily. “But probably not in the way you expect it to.”“Comforting.”After shutting down his computer Harry picked up his phone, typing and retyping responses to Louis before finally sending prove it before overthinking it.Louis sent him a dimly lit picture of himself in bed, hoodie pulled up and duvet clutched under his chin, he looked so sleepy and soft and warm and if Harry immediately saved it that was his only business.
***Harry found himself in front of Louis house, one of the few days he didn’t get a ride from Louis or Niall he managed to lock himself out.He sighed, his breath smoky in the air and trudged up the porch steps to knock on the door.One of the twins opened the door.“Yes?” she asked squinting at him.“Um, is Louis home?”“Duh.”Harry nodded. “Could I speak to him?”“Maybe.”“Phee who’s at the door?”“Your boyfriend.” she yelled over her shoulder.“So why are you making him stand in the cold?” Louis asked appearing from around the corner. “Let him in, honestly.”She shrugged and disappeared up the stairs.“Hey.” he said, opening the door wide enough for Harry to slip in. “What’s up?”“I got locked out.” Harry said, “And mum’s not home for a hours and Liam isn’t home to give me the spare.”“So you walked over here, hoping I’d be home?” Louis asked, leaning against the wall with a smirk.“I could have called couldn’t I?” Harry said, rolling his eyes at himself. “Sorry, I’ll go.”“Don’t be silly.” Louis said grabbing his elbow. “I’m only teasing you, I don’t have a key to yours but youre welcome to hang out here.”“You're sure?”“Absolutely.” Louis said tugging him out of his coat.Harry’s new favorite hobby quickly became watching Louis with his sisters, they were all huddled around the kitchen table and Louis seamlessly carried on four different conversations while helping the younger two with their homework.Harry startled when Louis kicked him under the table jerking his chin up to where Lottie stood behind him.“Sorry, what did you say? “ Harry asked feeling his cheeks heat up.“I asked if you wanted some cocoa. “ she said with a smirk, a match to the one Louis was currently sporting.“Sure. “ Harry said, ducking his head and running a hand through his hair.“Cool.” she said “D’you mind helping me?““Lots-” Louis started.“I don't mind. “ Harry said standing up.“You don't have to. “ Louis said shooting a look at his sister. “She just wants to be nosy. ““Well if you'd talk about him I wouldn't have to be.“ she retorted.“My relationship is none of your business Charlotte.”She rolled her eyes. “You're always bugging my boyfriends. ““Uh, yeah ‘cause I'm your older brother it's my job. ““I really don't mind. “ Harry said before Lottie could respond.Louis huffed and sat back.Lottie pointedly complimented Harry's band shirt and they talked music while waiting for the milk to heat ignoring Louis’ repeated glances.It took two trips to pass out the cocoa, when Harry followed Lottie over with two mugs in his hands he noticed his seat taken by one of the twins’ friends, he handed Louis his mug and turned to to lean against the counter only to be stopped by an arm around his waist.“C’mon then. “ Louis said tugging him to sit in his lap.“You’re sure?” Harry asked squirming.Louis rolled his eyes. “Yes, but hold still.”They stayed that way while Louis helped his sisters until Harry's mother texted asking where he was.“I'll walk you out. “ Louis said following him out of the kitchen.“You just want to make out. “ One of the twins said with an eye roll.“And what about it?“ Louis asked eyebrows raised, making Lottie and Fizzy giggle. “I can drive you if you want.” Louis said watching Harry step into his shoes and shrug into his coat.“I'm good, it's not far,  but thanks. ““You sure? “ Louis asked. “It's pretty dark out. ““I'll be fine.” Harry said.  “Promise.”Louis nodded slowly.  “Let me know when you're home alright then?““I will.“ Harry smiled, opening the door, a gust of cold wind sneaking in.Louis hesitated before leaning in and pressing a kiss to his cheek.“Now get out you're letting all the cold in.”After his shower Harry lay in bed checking various social media, he opens instagram to find Louis' sister has tagged him in a picture from today; he's on Louis' lap using his mug to hide a grin as Louis teases someone else at the table,  his hand his resting lightly on Harry's hip while Harry has his arm around his shoulders, it's….intimate.Harry's stomach flips over.He likes it and scrolls to see Lottie has just captioned it with an eye roll and sparkle heart emojis.Louis has already liked it and commented with a heart emoji.(I hadn't done me hair!! Warn a guy next time! )Harry hesitates before typing: Great lighting Lottie!  And replying to Louis: Soft is my favorite :(Louis replies quickly: I'll keep that in mind babycakes.Harry rolls his eyes and replies with: dweeb and a kiss emoji.He gets another notification finding Louis has tagged him in a picture, it's from when they went paintballing with Niall and Hailee recently, before the cold had set in and being outside was bearable. It must have been taken post game because he's covered in paint and sitting on a hay bale with a paper cup of cider and a soft smile,  a blurry figure in the corner that was Niall chasing Hailee around trying to get paint in her hair. Tb with good company.Niall had already commented BAES and Louis replied I'm blocking you.Harry likes it and comments: How are Tomlinsons so good at creeper pictures? Louis replies with a winking emoji.Harry scrolls his pictures to find one to post,  he doesn't quite know when they started sending pictures to each other all the time but his camera roll is full of Louis, he posts one from a day they went to the diner to study, Louis is leaning over his books and looking up through his lashes with a small smile at having caught Harry taking a picture. Best study partner.Louis is the first to like it commenting a heart.“Hey sweetie you still awake? “Harry sets his phone down and sits up. “Yeah, what's up? “Anne comes in and rolls his desk chair towards the bed, setting a paper bag on the floor.Harry eyes it warily.“So, Louis.” She says sitting down. “He's a sweet boy huh? ““Yeah, I guess. “ Harry agrees tentatively.“Are things serious? He's around a lot. ““We're just kind of… going with it right now. “Anne nodded  “I heard you wanted to go on the ski trip.”“Yeah,” Harry said playing with a loose string on his hoodie. “Everybody's going so I figured why not -if it's okay with you of course, I’ll be home the evening Gemma is,  I thought you two might like some time together, but if you don't want me too-”“Honey it's fine, I'm glad you want to go it'll be exciting! ““Yeah,  exciting. “ Harry said flatly, starting to see where this conversation was going.“First overnight trip with a boyfriend.”“Mum. “ Harry said warily. “The whole class is going and we'll have chaperones, it's not like that.”“I know that. “ Anne said. “And I know you'll be nineteen in a few months but as a parent I feel like I need to know you're protecting yourself. ““Mum.” Harry whined pulling his hood up and over his eyes.“I know you're a smart boy but it can be daunting so I bought you some things and some pamphlets- there's surprising little information for young gay men I'll be having words with the pharmacy-”“Mum, god no, please don't. ““I just want you to be prepared darling, I did the same for Gemma when she had her first serious boyfriend, I know there's a lot of pressures for someone your age and I want you to know you can always talk to me. ““I know mum.“ Harry sighed, peeking out of his hood. “Thanks.”Anne smiled warmly, patting his knee.  “I'll let you get back to texting your boy. ““It was Instagram actually.”Anne laughed, returning the chair. “Oh of course. " ***“She brought you a whole bag of condoms?“ Louis wheezed, leaning over.“I'm glad you find it funny. “ Harry said dryly, wrapping his coat tighter around himself, he was waiting for Niall to get out of detention, stopping by to see Louis before his game tonight.“I'm sorry. “ Louis said wiping his eyes. “I'm sorry. It's not funny, it's just the mental image is getting me. “Harry watched him with raised eyebrows until he finally caught his breath.“I'm sorry.” he said again, holding out his arms for a hug, pouting when Harry didn't step into them.Harry rolled his eyes and wrapped his arms around Louis shoulders.“If it makes you feel any better my mum had a whole box.““A box?” Harry asked, muffled by Louis shoulder.Louis hummed. “Turned out to be a convenient time to come out to her.”Harry laughed. “I should have told her this is fake.”Louis stiffened and pulled away. “Look on the bright side you won't have to do it again. ““Good point. “ Harry said stepping away from him reluctantly, he frowned as Louis rubbed his arms trying to stay warm.“Hello lovebirds.” Niall said, button up his coat. “It's fucking freezing.““Tell me about it.” Louis said. “Still coming to watch tonight?”“Of course.” Harry said. “Have to make sure I don't have a boyfriend-sicle by tomorrow. “Louis smiled tightly. “Might not be able to help that babe.““You're gonna have a best friend-sicle if we don't wrap this up. “ Niall said jumping up and down on the balls of his feet.Louis raised his eyebrows and Harry leaned in and kissed his cheek.  “See you later. “Louis face softened.  “See you.” When Louis team won that evening he made a beeline for Harry on the edge of the field, throwing his arms around his neck and kissing his soundly on the lips.“Sorry about the kiss.” Louis said once they settled in the car after the ten minutes it took Harry to convince him to let him drive.“It was fine.“ Harry said, ignoring the butterfly that woke at the mention.“I should have asked you beforehand, I wasn't thinking.”“It's fine, really.” Harry said. “It would have been weird if you hadn't.”Louis shrugged and ran a hand through his still damp hair.“How many games do you have left?”“Just one.” Louis said. “After Thanksgiving, you don't have to come if you don't want to. ““And miss the lot of you running around in those shorts? Never. “Louis snorted.“What are you doing for Thanksgiving?”“Not much, mum wants to make some food for the girls but we're not really fussed, you?”Harry shrugged. “Mum's going to visit a friend and I'm supposed to go see my dad.”“Do you not get on?  Louis asked turning to face him.Harry kept his eyes on the road, it was raining lightly, if it kept up over night they'd have a dusting of snow by morning. “I don't really spend enough time around him to know. ““That's not a no.”Harry sighed. “I mean,  he left when I was little,  got married again within a year and was expecting a baby by Christmas, it's just… awkward. She and the kids are all so nice,  It's like they genuinely want me around, I'm not just the product of his former marriage to them but I can't help feeling, like, betrayed I guess? He's my dad but at the same time he's not. ““I think that's all normal, Haz. It's a weird spot to be in.”“Yeah, I guess. “Louis watched him as he pulled into his street.“Let me know what you do, okay?”“Sure.” Harry said putting the car in park outside his house. “You're sure you can get home okay? “Louis chuckled. “It's a street and three houses.”“It's dark and rainy. “ Harry said with a pout.Louis shook his head with a smile and opened the car door, a burst of cold wind rushing in, Harry stepped out and met Louis, the rain sharp on his face.“Sleep tight, curly. “ Louis said touching the back of Harry's neck briefly before slipping back in the car, he sat waiting for Harry to unlock his front door before driving off. Harry woke up Thursday sick.“I dunno know yet but this is your fault. “ Harry told Louis once he assured his mother he could handle staying home alone, taking it as a sign to not go to his dads.Louis laugh was tinny over the phone. “Yeah,  I coughed on your voodoo doll. ““I knew it.” Harry said before sneezing.“Alright there Styles?” Louis asked,  there was the snap of a door and the background was quiet. “Y’need anything? ““I'm dying but no. I'm good.““You sure? I'm sorry you got sick. “ Louis voice was soft.“I’ll be okay. I've got some leftovers and Netflix.”“Netflix and cold?“Harry’s laugh was interrupted by a cough.“Call me if you need anything okay Styles? I don't mind running over something.”Harry smiled to himself. “Okay.”He felt slightly more human after a nap,  a shower and tea,  he was dozing on the couch again when there was a knock at the door.Harry stood, pulling up the hood on his sweatshirt and shuffled over.“You look ill.” Louis said in way of greeting.It took Harry a moment to get over how good he looked in jeans and his usual denim jacket, it wasn't anything special from his day to day, must be the fever.“You thought I was lying?” Harry croaked, stepping aside so he could come in.“No but maybe dramatizing it. “ Louis said slipping off his jacket and picking up a bag he brought. He brought his hand to Harry's forehead. “You're really warm. ““Your hand is cold.” Harry said batting him away.“Have you been drinking enough? Mum said you have to drink to flush it out. ““I had some whiskey, couple shots, the usual.” Harry said with a shrug.Louis’ lips quirked up.  “I didn't think you were one for mixing liquors, how many more surprises are you hiding? “Harry laughed before coughing into his elbow with a groan.“I brought you some ginger tea. “ Louis said his voice taking on that soft quality again. “Mum says it's really good for a cold,  I was gonna text you about it but I figured you probably didn't have any and we happen to have a box so I figured I might as well bring it over ‘cause if I told you and you didn't have any then of course you'd want some and there's nothing worse than wanting something you don't have. “Harry stared at him.“I can make you a cup,  if you'd like.” Louis said.  “Or I can go, you probably don't want to be around anyone, like, when I'm sick I just want to wallow alone and sleep so I'll go and let you alone. ““Stay.” Harry said, cutting him off.  “Please. Unless you need to, you said something about dinner? “Louis smiled.  “Lunch and it's three in the afternoon.”“Oh. “ Harry said glancing at the clock and biting his lip. “Okay, so you can stay? “Louis smile soften impossibly more. “I can stay.”Harry smiled and followed him into the kitchen, leaning on the counter as he set the kettle to boil.“Have you taken anything? “ Louis asked over his shoulder, setting a mug up.“I took some ibuprofen earlier.” Harry whispered, his throat throbbing. “Cough syrup makes me weird.”Louis hummed. “Have you eaten enough?”“Yes mum.”Louis swatted him with a dish towel before turning off the kettle and filling the mug,he turned back to the bag he'd brought.“Mum sent some soup, she overheard us talking.“ Louis explained pulling out a container. “She makes it whenever any of us catch a cold. It's pretty magical to be honest.““It looks good.“ Harry said reaching for the container and taking a sip. “I can actually taste it! “Louis laughed and turned back to the tea, “Do you take sugar?”“What do you take me for? “Louis pointed at him.  “Good man. Why are you here? Get on the couch, honestly.”Harry dutifully followed him out to the couch, plopping back down to where he'd snuggled with his comforter.“Oh no. “ he said watching Louis set his tea on the coffee table. “You should go,  you'll get sick.”Louis rolled his eyes sitting down next to Harry.“If I haven't gotten sick yet I'm not going to.““But-”“Nothing. “ Louis said grabbing the remote,  “What are we watching? Christmas movies, really? You can't just search romantic comedies like a normal sick lad?““I like them.” Harry said defensively. “It's the season anyway. “Louis rolled his eyes again and pressed play for whatever was next in line.“Only because you're sick.““Hey Lou? “Louis hummed not looking away from the movie.“Do you mind if I lay down? ”“Not at all, use me as a pillow if you want I'm used to it.”“You don't mind?”“Get over here.“ Louis said patting his leg.The moment Harry's head was on his lap Louis started carding his hand through his hair.“This okay?” he asked pausing.Harry hummed sleepily and he continued.Harry must have fallen asleep because he woke to Louis calling his name softly.“Sorry,  it's getting late."“You have to go? “ Harry asked, pouting, hating the idea of being alone again, he always got so clingy when he was sick.“I should, I'm likely to fall asleep and we don't want your mum to think your secreting boys in while she's away. ““Not secreting.“ Harry muttered.  “You're a good pillow. “Louis studied his face before groaning, digging in his pocket.  “Fine I'll stay let me let my mum know. “Harry sighed happily hugging Louis around the middle and promptly falling back asleep. Harry slowly woke to the steady pressure of a body behind him,  arms around his waist and the gentle press  of Louis' lips behind his ear.“I'm sorry. “ he whispered sensing Harry waking. “I can't help myself.”He continued down Harry's neck, sucking lightly on his pulse point and Harry woke all at once,  he rolled over and up onto his knees straddling Louis who hisses as his full weight settled on his hips.“What are you doin’ Haz? “ he asked voice rough.“Something I should have a while ago. “ Harry said fisting Louis shirt and leaning down to press their lips together.Louis opened to him with a groan, hands sliding up into Harry's hair.“Shit Harry.” Louis whispered as they pulled apart to breathe. He pressed back against him and his hands were suddenly everywhere; sliding down Harry's back and down to grip his ass, pulling him impossibly closer.“Fuck Lou.” Harry said shifting his hips and swallowing Louis’ groan. Harry jumped awake, almost falling off the couch as the front door snapped shut, his mother's voice filling the house“I'm so sorry honey, I know I said I'd done right home there were deals I couldn't pass up - oh!”She startled taking in the two boys snuggled together on the couch, Louis had slipped down to lay behind Harry his arm pillowing his head.“I'm sorry I should have called.”“Hey mum.” Harry said roughly.“Hey Ms.-” Louis started popping his head up, one arm still pinned by Harry's head the other wrapped around his waist.“Call me Ms. anything and you're not allowed in this house again. ““Yes ma'am.” Louis said slipping back down, hiding behind Harry.“I'll go put some coffee on.” Anne said with a smile.Harry rubbed his face and sat up, Louis following suit.“How do you feel? “ he asked rubbing Harry's back, his face was indented from the couch his hair was flat on one side, wild on the other and he stilled looked good.Maybe it wasn't the fever yesterday.“Better, “ Harry said with a smile, ducking down and running his hands through his own hair to keep from staring. “Your mum's soup is magical.”“I told you. ” Louis said with a quick grin,  he searched Harry's face and tucked his hair behind his ear. “I should go.”“Yeah.” Harry said softly.Louis stood and stretched,  his sweater riding up with the motion revealing smooth golden skin that Harry had to tear his eyes away from, cheeks heating as his dream came back to the front of his mind.“Thanks for coming over. “ Harry said.“Anytime.” Louis smiled, he dropped a hand to Harry's hair carding through it.“Are you staying for lunch, love?” Anne asked, peeking out of the kitchen.“I actually need to be going but thank you.” Louis said, finding his phone between the couch cushions.“Of course.“ Anne said. “Next time then, say hello to your mum for me.““Next time.“ Louis confirmed with a nod, stepping into his shoes.“And thank you for taking care of my boy.““Mum. “ Harry warned stepping closer.“It was my pleasure.” Louis said with a smile as he shrugged on his coat, he gave Harry's cheek a quick kiss and slipped out the door with a soft bye. ***  Louis scored the winning goal of his last game, he made a beeline for Harry after his teammates released him, and to Harry's slight disappointment, hugged him tightly until Niall and Hailee jumped on them.Louis teammate had told them to keep the party contained to the cellar but unsurprisingly it had spilled into the house and the backyard raising in volume the later it got, much more and Harry would have to leave his somewhat uncomfortable perch on the couch next to the two guys getting high and playing video games and start rounding up his friends before the cops were called.He sipped his soda and glanced around the room keeping an eye on them being the responsible designed driver he'd offered to be; Niall and Hailee were making out under the stairs and Louis was playing some drinking game with his friends.“Wanna play?” The guy next to him asked holding out the controller.“Nah, I'm happy watching, thanks. “The guy shrugged and then held up a Tupperware container full of brownies.“Want one?”“I'm a driver. “ Harry said holding up his can.“That's cool.““Are those brownies? “ Louis asked as he dropped into Harry's lap.Harry caught his hand. “No mixing.“Louis sighed and dropped his head to Harry's shoulder. “‘m a little tipsy. ““Just a little. “ Harry said with a laugh.Louis sighed again, tipping his face closer to Harry's neck,  close enough Harry could feel his nose brush against his skin, making it break out in goosebumps.“You smell good. “ he murmured.“Thank you?”“You're  welcome.“ Louis whispered and -oh, his lips were brushing against the side of Harry's neck now.Those were definitely lips trailing up Harry's neck to behind his ear and down again.“Can I? “ Louis whispered on one upward track.“Yeah.” Harry breathed back without any idea to what he was agreeing to, anything to keep Louis steady weight across his thighs and his lips on his neck.
He was so fucked.
He felt Louis smile against his skin before tracing down his neck, his empty hand gripped Louis hip as he began sucking a mark on his pulse point. It seemed to take forever for Louis to be satisfied with it and Harry was very aware of every point of contact.“Okay?” Louis asked after pulling away and humming happily with his work, his finger coming up to trace around it before making eye contact with Harry.“Yeah. “ Harry said sounding breathless to his own ears, he cleared his throat. “I'm good, ready to go? “Louis frowned slightly but wriggled to get off Harry's lap, smirking when Harry sighed deeply.The drive was quiet; Niall and Hailee weren't speaking to each other after Niall had, according to Hailee, sounded too friendly to his ex, Shawn, Niall thought she was being ridiculous, it had been three years since they'd dated.They'd be over it in a few days, Harry knew, after complaining to him for hours on end before finally calling each other and making up.Louis had been drifting in and out of sleep since he called shotgun and leaned against the door, it wasn't a long drive but Harry was glad he had been paying attention on the way there, the roads dark with thick trees running alongside them.Hailee’s was first, arguing still she leaned over and kissed Niall cheek before slowly making her way up to the porch, opening the door and waving to Harry before slipping inside,  he waited until she turned off the porch light before driving off.It had started to rain by the time they got Niall's  house, he  sighed and clapped Harry on the shoulder before sliding out and jogging up the path, he waved before slipping inside, shutting off the light.“Lou.”  Harry said touching his knee as he pulled on his street.  “Lou we're almost to yours. ““I'll sleep here. “ Louis muttered dropping his hand on top of Harry's.“It'll get cold when the heats off.“Louis grumbled something as Harry turned off the car and began buttoning up his coat.“What are you doing? “ Louis asked finally,  peeling himself off the window.“Getting ready to walk home?”“I think the fuck not.” Louis snapped. “You're driving.”“Lou, it's your car.”“If you think I'm letting you walk home in this rain you're insane. Drive home and I'll come get it tomorrow.”“Are you sure?”Louis rolled his eyes and leaned over pressing a kiss to Harry's cheek. “Good night.”“G'night. “ Harry said,  starting the car again.Louis smiled and slipped out of the car,  jogging up to his front door, he waved before slipping inside. Louis texted him the next morning.
Twins had a sleepover, save me.
Breakfast?  Harry offered.
In 15?
“Bless you. “ Louis said climbing into the car. “I didn't remember how loud a dozen teenage girls are. “Harry chuckled, putting the car in drive. “The diner? ““Anywhere that has greasy food and coffee. “ Louis replied snuggling back in his hoodie.“You did have a bit to drink.”Louis snorted. “You’re a terrible fake boyfriend for letting me drink that much, I feel my brain has a separate heartbeat. ““You were celebrating.”  Harry shrugged.Louis laughed softly,  turning in his seat to watch Harry drive.“I can't believe you let me do that to your neck.““You remember?”“Of course I do.“Harry shrugged, the back of his neck heating up, he had been counting on Louis not remembering and hadn't bothered covering it up.“I didn't mind it.”Louis hummed. “Was it your first?“The heat in Harry's neck was spreading up to his cheeks.“You don't have to be embarrassed with me you know.”“I'm not.” Harry said honestly. “Not anymore,  anyway.”Louis was quiet and Harry looked over at a stop light, he was watching him with a soft smile.“I'm really glad.” Harry got the notification as he dried his hands, pausing outside the bathroom he opened instagram to see Louis had posted a picture of him driving from today captioned: just because.Most of Louis recent pictures were dedicated to his face now,  Harry thought it might be a little overkill but he didn't voice that.
Why?

It's hot when you drive my car.
Harry chewed his lip as he typed: You're hot.
I know I am and obviously so is my boyfriend. Duh.
 ***
The weather finally forced them to eat indoors, they claimed an empty classroom, sprawling on the floor.

“Any plans for Louis birthday?“ Hailee asked.

“What did you guys do last year?“ Harry asked biting into his apple.

“We went out to dinner and I gave her the necklace. “

Hailee immediately scooped the pendent from under her sweater, holding it out for Harry to see.

“It's the moon phase from the night of our first kiss.” She gushed like she hadn't shown him before.
Louis walked in then,  eyes set on his phone. “What is? “ he asked locking his phone and sitting down next to Harry.“My birthday present from last year.” Hailee said showing him, he smiled softly and turned over the pendent.“That's beautiful.”Hailee beamed tucking the pendent back under her collar.“I'll come up with something.”  Harry mumbled.Louis shot him a look.“Don't wait until the last minute.” Niall said, looking between them.“What are we talking about?”“Nothing.”Louis frowned and leaned towards him when his phone rang, he sat back and tapped Harry's hand before pulling his phone out of his pocket, flashing the others a smile before standing and leaving the room. The phone calls continued over the next few days, ducking out over and over to take a call,  any free time was spent with his eyes glued to his phone texting someone while his texts to Harry slowed and he changed the subject everytime Harry asked.It was obvious what was going on, Harry thought as he watched Louis pace outside the diner one afternoon as they studied,  his books spread across the table phone to his ear a smile forming as he talked.Louis found someone.It shouldn't be a surprise. Louis was a great guy and it shouldn't bother Harry, this was and had always been fake.It really shouldn't bother him.But it really did.***“Hey.” Louis said grabbing Harry's wrist between classes and pulling him into a quiet corner. “Something came up so I can't study this afternoon, is that okay? I'm really sorry.”“Doesn't sound like there's much choice.” Harry said shortly,  trying to duck around him.“Hey. “ Louis said holding onto his arm. “I'm sorry, I'll make it up to you.”Harry shrugged,  dislodging Louis hand. He knew he wasn't being fair, Louis had his own life, one that clearly didn't include Harry.“It doesn't matter.”“Harry, “ Louis called after him.Harry ignored him. “Everything okay?” Hailee asked gently, watching Harry dismiss Louis call again.“Fine.” Harry said,  not looking up from studying.Hailee tapped her highlighter on her textbook.  “First fights are always tough.”“We're not fighting.”“Alright.” she said sceptically. Harry managed to avoid Louis for the next two days, ignoring texts and riding in with Niall or catching the bus until Louis caught him in the hall, appearing by his locker as he put his books away for the day.“So, mind telling me why you're ignoring me?”“I'm ignoring you? “Louis raised his eyebrows. “ You keep ignoring my texts and calls.”“I'm surprised you noticed. You're so busy talking to someone else.”Louis shook his head searching Harry's face. “Are you talking about Stan?”Harry felt a spike of anger, slamming his locker door shut. “Oh, that's nice, were you planning on saying anything?”“About what?”“Or just letting me be blindsided?” Harry continued, blood rushing in his ears. “I know this was all a joke to you but I didn't think you'd make me look like an idiot,  I didn't think you were that kind of person. ““What the hell are you even talking about?“ Louis said loudly.People along the hall paused their conversations, Harry spotted Liam looking over from across the hall. He dropped his voice. “I really don't know H.”Harry sighed, the eyes up and down the hall were making his neck itch.“Just… a heads up would have been nice, I thought we were friends- I didn't even know you were looking.”Louis scrubbed his hands through his hair. “We are friends, Harry of course, but I really have no idea what you're talking about. Looking for what?“Harry started backing away. “Nothing, just forget it. ““Harry. “ Louis said almost desperately.  “C'mon, talk to me. “Harry shook his head and turned away,  slipping between people, and avoiding Liam's muttered question. ***Is it true? “ Hailee demanded,  plopping down next to him.Harry peeled his face off the window of the bus with a groan. It was too early. Actually it had been too early when his alarm went off at five in the morning and four hours later, after his mother making sure he packed everything he would need and sitting in this cold bus waiting for everyone else to arrive, Harry was pretty sure he was in hell.“Is what true? “ he asked taking her scarf and making a pillow.“That you and Louis broke up.”“It's all over school.” Niall added from behind him.“Everyone's saying you had a huge fight in the hall yesterday and Louis was in tears after you left.““I don't think I've ever seen Louis cry.” Niall mused. “Besides that dog commercial-”“The one with the baby, the dog and the stuffed lion?” Hailee interjected.“Who doesn't cry at that one?” Harry mumbled.“Good point, it's like that beer commercial-.”Harry heard Hailee smack Nialls arm. “Don't change the subject.”“Hails he clearly doesn't want to talk about it.” Niall sighed, sounding resigned. “He would have called last night if he did. ““Exactly.” Harry said tucking into his pillow. “I'm sleeping now.”“Boys are ridiculous.” Hailee huffed, Harry heard her settling back in the seat.“Don't.” he heard Niall mutter a few minutes later. “Let it alone.”Then he heard Louis voice at the front of the bus.He didn't come any closer. Harry managed to fake sleep until the bus finally slowed to a stop and the buzz of excitement grew. He opened his eyes with a sigh and handed Hailee back her scarf,  stretching to make his back pop.“If I could have your attention for just a mo. “ Louis said over the chatter, standing at the front of the bus,  blocking the way.“Mr. Tomlinson.” Their history teacher said warily. “I'm not being paid to indulge teenage drama.”“It'll take just a minute I promise.” Louis assured before turning back to the rest of the bus, he found Harry and caught his gaze. “I just want to clear up the rumors. “Harry looked away,  picking at the loose thread in his sweater, trying to blink away the sudden burning in his eyes.“The rumor that Harry and I broke up yesterday is rampant and I just to clear up that we didn't break up.”Harry swallowed thickly.“Because we were never dating.“ his voice faltered and Harry looked up,  Louis had been watching him but looked away,  eyes on something at the back of the bus. “Everything you've seen from us the last few months has been fake. A hoax.”“What?” Hailee breathed next to him.“Congratulations. “ Louis said flatly,  his eyes dropped his feet and Harry looked away again. “You've all been pranked.”Harry heard him take the stairs in two steps, the crunch of shoes on gravel and the bus erupted in murmurs.“You lied to us? “ Hailee asked and Harry's throat burned, he dropped his head onto the back of the seat in front of him,  trying to keep his breathing even.“Hailee.” Niall said softly but firmly. “Not now.” Niall didn't blink at Harry as he strode in and dropped his bag on the other twin bed,  before coming and standing in front of the TV, arms crossed.Harry protested half heartedly from his blanket cocoon, nobody told him how cold the mountains were.“Planning on moping all weekend?”“I mean, it sounds like a solid plan, there's a Nicholas Sparks marathon on, my friends hate me and my fake boyfriend announced to the whole grade it was a prank so.”“You're  in love with him.” It wasn't a question.“Pathetic isn't it?” Harry said tugging the drawstrings on his hoodie, eyes filling with tears sharply. “I'm so stupid.”Niall didn't soften. “You're not stupid, but you are being stupid.““Niall, you don't understand.”Niall dropped his arms and came to sit on the edge of Harry's bed. “Explain it then, I've got all night.”So Harry did, he started from the very beginning.Niall was quiet and expressionless while he talked.“Definitely being stupid.” he said when Harry finished.Harry sighed.“How long have you been in love with him?“ he asked, voice softening slightly.“I dunno.” Harry said with a shrug. “There's not a defining moment, it was just…there.”Niall hummed. “You really don't think he feels anything for you? “Harry shook his head, wiping at his eyes with frustration, he was sick of crying today. “I told you he's texting some guy, and you heard his speech on the bus.”“But wasn't that what you guys had decided before? Before you had started all this? Before your argument? Before you had feelings for him? “Harry nodded.“You don't think maybe Louis just said all that because that's what he thought you wanted? You two haven't exactly had a conversation about any of this.”“Niall it doesn't matter, he's talking to some guy, he's done with this. Done with me.”“Do you know that for sure?”“Niall-”“No.” he cut him off. “All you've got is a name, the fact they've been texting, that's it. Your jealousy got in the way of thinking Harry.”Harry sat up.  “You don't know either! Seems pretty damning from where I'm standing.”“I know I don't know him as well as you but I do know Louis wouldn't do that to you. Hell,  just from what you've said he wouldn't be so heartless. “Harry sank back. “It doesn't matter anyway, he was just helping me and getting his ex off his back, feelings weren't part of the deal.““What ex?”Harry rolled his eyes,  of course Niall picked up on the most trivial thing.“I dunno he never gave a name. Does it matter? ““No. Harry, “ Niall said slowly. “I mean I haven't seen Louis date anyone other than you in like two years.”Harry's heart sped up despite itself. “What do you mean?”“I think you should talk to him- I mean really talk.”“Niall-”“I've never seen him the way he is with you H,” Niall said gently. “And today, well, he's not acting like he's done with you.““I don't even know what I would say.” Harry said miserably.“Start with the truth, tell him how you feel,  ask him how he feels, what's the worst that can happen at this point? ““You make it sound so simple.” Harry sighed.Niall shook his head. “Nothing is but in the end it's worth it.”“You sound like Yoda.”“Speak to him you must. “ Niall said in a bad imitation.  Harry felt silly walking the halls in his boxers and a hoodie but luckily most everyone was in bed or tucked up in the sitting area with the dying fire,  tired after a long day on the slopes and if he turned back to put on pants he wasn't sure If Niall would even let him in or that he'd leave again.The hot tub was in an adjoining glass building to the hotel looking out over the snowy hills, the emergency lights up and down the mountain twinkling brightly making it hard to tell where the sky ended and the mountains began.The door made a whooshing sound when Harry opened it, the air  was just on the edge of being too cold, the hot tub steaming where it sat in the center.  Louis was alone in it, arms draped along the lip and head tilted back, eyes close, the back lighting dancing across him as the tub bubbled.“Hey.” Harry said softly, walking towards him.Louis lifted his head. “Hey.”“Whatcha doing?” Harry asked standing on the step around the tub.Louis tilted his head back again but kept his eyes on Hatry. “Trying to see if they'll let me stay in here the whole weekend.”“I thought you liked to ski?”“Don't feel much like it.” Louis said.Harry nodded. “You want company?”Louis shrugged. Harry bit his lip and swung his leg over the ledge, the water felt burning on his cold legs as he sat on the edge.“Are you in your pants?” Louis asked sitting up again. “We're in the mountains Haz.”“I have a hoodie.” Harry protested. “I wanted to talk to you.”“Oh? “ Louis said eyes dropping to the foaming water.“Who's Stan?” Harry asked,  berating himself the moment the words left his mouth.Louis let out a bark of laughter. “An old friend of mine, his family owns a restaurant in town.”“Oh.” Harry whispered.“Yeah.” Louis said looking up. “Wait, was that what yesterday was about?”Harry looked away and nodded, biting his lip.Louis sighed.  “Why didn't you just ask?”Harry shrugged. “You were hiding the fact you were talking to him, I thought you were seeing someone.”“Bit of a jump there H,  and I wasn't hiding who I was talking to, I was hiding what we were talking about.““I wasn't thinking.” Harry said. “So what were you talking about?”“I walked into that one didn't I?” Louis laughed. “I was talking to him about getting a reservation for after Christmas - I knew they'd be booked up and I was counting on him owing me a favor.”“Oh.” Harry said feeling even more sheepish.“Can you guess why?” Louis was teasing him but his eyes were sharp, watching Harry with rapt attention.“You… like supporting small businesses?” Harry guessed.Louis splashed him and pointed towards the door. “Get out.”Harry laughed.Louis sighed, sinking down in the water. “I wanted to take you out to dinner.”“Me?”Louis sat up again, “Well I'm certainly not going to take myself out.”“Why? “ Harry said ignoring the quip.“Because.” Louis said, sinking back down and his voice softening. “Because I wanted to tell you how much I like you.”Harry's breath caught.“I wanted to tell you that, if you were willing,  I'd like to be with you for real. Because pretending my feelings for you are fake is killing me.”“What about your ex?”Louis shook his head. “There never was one.  I just didn't want you to feel awkward.”“You like me?” Harry asked. “This isn't a joke?”Louis shook his head and sat back against the tub. “C'mere.”Harry stood stepping fully into the water, it was deep, up past his waist he could feel the water creeping up his hoodie as he waded across, Louis lifted a hand from the water and cupped Harry's face.“I'm more than half way in love with you, have been for ages, to be honest.” Louis whispered.“Yeah?” “Yeah.” Louis said with a breathless laugh.  “Very much so and I'd like to kiss you if I could.”Harry didn't answer,  closing the distance between them swiftly, Louis other hand immediately went to his hair, threading through it before sliding down his back to hook under his knee, pulling him up to straddle his lap.“Okay?” he whispered, hand staying low on Harry's waist.“More than.” Harry said kissing him again.Louis kissed him like he was only getting one chance; tinged with desperation despite the fact he kept breaking into smiles,  his hands slipped under Harry's hoodie and traced lightly up and down the length of his back, touch feather light and delicate, as if touch could break.Harry couldn't help but run his hands across the  smooth expense of Louis damp back and shoulders and up onto his hair. “Who are you rooming with?” Louis as they walked, hands clasped between them, they'd stayed in the hot tub long past curfew and the hotel was quiet and dark as they made their way to the elevators.“Niall.”Louis hummed as the elevator opened.“I could convince him to switch.” Harry suggested casually as they stopped outside his room.Louis leaned against the wall with a smile. “Dangerous suggestion there.”Harry shrugged, feeling his cheeks warm.Louis cupped his face. “I want to do this right,  take you out, be with you and be a proper good boyfriend before we do anything, I don't want you to regret anything because you wanted to catch up too fast.” “Okay, but wouldn't have been about catching up.” Harry said softly.  “It would be about being with you, because I want to.”Louis touched his forehead to Harry's. “God,  I'm so in love with you.”He kissed him before Harry could respond, they stayed that way until the door at Harry's elbow opened.“Well at least it's not a murderer.” Niall said, grumpily leaving the door open and padding back to bed. “Wait, why the hell are you wet? “ ***  Bad idea.  Harry thought as he rung the doorbell at Louis house at nine-thirty at night on Christmas Eve. Stupid idea.Louis answered, looking cozy in flannel pajama pants, a thick sweater and socks.“Hey, babe.” he said sounding confused as he stepped out onto the porch. “What's up?”“Happy Birthday?”Louis smiled softly.  “Thank you darling, but you already said that this morning you didn't have to come stand in the cold.”“I know.” Harry said frustrated with himself, since the ski trip he'd been getting tongue tied and having trouble staying on topic around Louis. (Which his sister found hilarious when Louis stopped by their annual Christmas party and it took Harry a good fifteen minutes to tell her they were really together now.)“I have your present.”Louis frowned. “I told you not to get me anything.”“I didn't get you anything, so to speak, can you leave for a couple of hours?  You probably have family over, of course, stupid idea sorry-”“Hazza.” Louis said cupping Harry's face with both of his hands and pressing a quick kiss to his mouth. “Nothing you say or do is ever stupid. My nan has been asleep for hours, the girls are doing last minute wrapping and I would love to get out for a bit with you.”“You would?”Louis rolled his eyes. “Yeah I would especially with you, do I need to get dressed?”Harry shook his head. “Just shoes and a coat.”“Sick.” Louis murmured stealing another kiss before popping back inside.Harry leaned against the car while he waited for Louis, convincing his mother to let him take the car this late at night had taken some persuasion but luckily Gemma agreed to wait up for him.“First things first.” Louis said hopping down the steps and right into Harry's space without a pause.Harry smiled as Louis wrapped his arms around his waist and kissed him.“Hi. Missed you.”“Missed you too even though we talked this morning.” Harry said kissing him again just because he could and tiny snowflakes were catching on Louis eyelashes.“Can't kiss you over the phone.” Louis pointed out as Harry walked around to the drivers side.“Good thing we live so close, even three days was pushing it.” Harry said seriously as he started the car.“Every second we're not is pushing it.” Louis said with a laugh,  tucking himself into the seat and turning up the heat. “Where are we going? ““You'll see.”Louis sighed.  “Who knew you being mysterious would be sexy?”Harry barked out a laugh, as Louis flipped on the radio.“You're not taking me into the woods to murder me are you?” Louis asked pausing his sing along to Santa Baby as Harry turned.“You caught me.” Harry said now turning onto a dirt road and turning on the high beams,  it had started snowing in earnest as they drove and crashing was definitely not something Harry planned on.“After my parents split my dad took Gems and I camping one time.” Harry explained. “It was terrible.”Louis laughed and reached over and tucked his hair behind his ear. “ Not the outdoorsy type, gotcha.”“The campsite is beautiful though.” Harry said. “It's too cold right now but there's a dock and a lake and I thought it would be really pretty with the snow.”He was rambling now, caught up in nerves as he turned the final corner and coasted up the empty site to an bare spot near the lake, the snow was dusting the sandy bar around it and coated dock, the lake smooth glassy snowflakes disappearing as they touched the surface.“It's not terribly exciting or anything but I thought you might like to get out for a-”Louis cut him off with a kiss, climbing over the center console and on top his lap, sliding Harry's seat back to avoid the steering wheel.“It's so beautiful Harry, thank you.”  he wrapped his arms around Harry and hugged him tightly.“There's hot chocolate in the back and mum made some apple turnovers-”Louis cut him off again, giving him no choice but to kiss him back,  hands resting lightly on his hips.“I love you so much.” Louis punctuated each word with a kiss,  before sitting up with back to the door and his legs over the console,  only kneeing Harry in the balls once.The hot chocolate was still warm and the turnovers were just cool enough to eat as they sat quietly watching the snow fall.“No one's ever done this for me.” Louis said softly, his hand carding through Harry's hair, it was down to his shoulders now but he'd grown fond of it and Louis loved playing with it so he had no plans to cut it yet.“Made you turnovers?”Louis tugged on a curl and then soothed it. “Taken me anywhere special on my birthday.”Harry frowned. “Why not?”“It is Christmas Eve after all. “ Louis said with a smile.  “That's hardly fair.” Harry said. “I'll have to take you somewhere from now on.”“Yeah?” Louis asked biting his lip,  eyes sparkling.“Yeah, ‘til you get tired of me.”“Not gonna happen anytime soon.” Louis said smiling and leaning in to kiss him. “Best birthday present, thank you.”“You really think so?” Harry whispered, their lips brushing.“I love it. This was so special, Harry really.”“I love you.” Harry whispered, pulling back slightly.Louis’ eyes darted around his face smile growing.  There wasn't a reason Harry hadn't said it yet over the past week ( besides Louis not giving him a chance between the words and a kiss,  he was very distracting that way) but now he was glad he waited, glad this was something they'd remember.“I'm so in love with you I can't comprehend it sometimes.” Harry said. “I don't think it ever went away, I'm so glad mum sent those letters because I would have missed this and I honestly don't know what I'd have done.”Louis rested their foreheads together. “I'm so lucky I got that letter even if you do think I'm dick motivated.”Harry groaned. “I'm still sorry about that.”“I think I definitely can forgive you.” Louis said with a smile. “But I'm definitely bringing it up every chance I get.”Harry groaned again.“I'm sure you can come up with a distraction.”“I'm sure I'll come up with something.” Harry smiled and tugged him down into a kiss.  *** “The last box.” Louis announced, nudging the door shut behind him and kicking Harry's boots out of his way (he found them for discount while in London with Gemma over the summer, Louis claims he hates them but Harry thinks he secretly likes being able to tuck himself under his arm when they walk, just like how he had teased Harry about how thick his accent got while he was away before admitting it was hot.) setting it on the makeshift coffee table and plopping onto Harry's lap.“I think we underestimated how much stuff four people have.” Niall said scratching the back of his neck, looking over the stacks of boxes that covered most of the room.“It's not us babe.” Hailee said, hopping down from her perch on the counter where she'd been ordering pizza. “You have, like, double the boxes of anyone.”“Me?” Niall said incredulously. “Miss ‘come help me empty my closet'.”“I have a small closet!” Hailee squealed as Niall chased her from the room.“A four hour commute doesn't sound so bad.” Louis said listening to them bicker and laugh.Harry laughed. “You don't want to live with me?”“You? Yes. Them? I'm not so sure. ““Them can hear you.” Niall said as he carried Hailee in on his back. “You love us.”“I love my sisters and I wouldn't willingly live with them.”“We all know that's a lie.” Hailee panted, still breathless with giggles when Niall dropped her on the couch.“All I hear is him saying we're like family.” Niall shrugged.  Harry and Hailee cooed while Louis sputtered.“It's going to be a long year.” he sighed, melodramatic, slumping back into Harry.“It's going to be a good year.” Harry countered softly into his ear.Louis kicked his feet up into Niall lap after he sat and tucked Hailee under his arm.“It's going to be a great year.” Louis said catching Harry's smile and kissing his cheek.