Archive of Our Own

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Part One: Forks

“You can’t go...back home to places in the country, back home to the old forms and systems of things which once seemed everlasting, but which are changing all the time...”

Thomas Wolf, 1940.

_____________________

Bella

The Seattle-Tacoma International Airport had changed in my six-year absence. It was bigger, more robust, scrubbed white linoleum in every direction. I followed the directional signs (even before the building’s expansion I had been perpetually lost) toward baggage claim. I kept my eyes forward. I didn’t look for the pieces of the airport I had spent so much of my adolescence sitting in or wandering around between flights. Something grimier, carpeted and damp.“Are you sure about this?” My mother had asked earlier that day, inexplicably crying again as she dropped me off at Departures. Like all the preparations hadn’t been made already. Like it wouldn’t have been unimaginably cruel to my father to cancel all the plans the day of.I was sure. Doubt had seized me more than a few times on the long flight, but no, I was sure.The airport’s Arrivals wing had been the focus of the more major renovations. I descended into it on an escalator, glancing between Charlie’s text and the amassed crowd of people waiting for baggage or for wayward daughters.To my immediate right was the wall – a mile high, probably, and made of glass. It spanned the long, tall room like a threat. Through it, flat, paved landing strips and far off trees, packed tightly against the breeze whipping in off the Sound. It was all but fully nighttime. The dark allowed me to see my reflection in the glass.Yay! Renée had texted me after I told her I landed safely.I’ll be here, Charlie had responded to the same.The elevator delivered me to the floor. I walked forward, looking, counting the baggage carousels. It was all brand-new equipment, chrome edges, neatly made informatics on standing signs and crisp airport workers striding around looking exhausted.Then, Charlie.Tired from the travel, ears still popping from the altitude and the extra thirty minutes of taxi-ing, I forgot myself and strode straight into him.Charlie made a sound of surprise, or maybe pleasure. His arms were at once familiar and alien to me, thrown up hastily in a hug he hadn’t expected – we weren’t huggers, as a rule. Unlike the airport, Charlie had not changed one iota. He smelled like aftershave and men’s soap and there was an aura of cold and rain perpetually stuck to his clothes.We hugged. We stopped hugging. He pointed up at the glowing sign above the nearest carousel.“This the one?”I nodded, turning to watch the rapidly thinning procession of baggage.Beside me, Charlie cleared his throat. “You look good,” he said. “Tan. How’s Renée?”“She’s good,” I said, without elaborating. He nodded.Only two suitcases had come with me from Arizona. The smaller one was every piece of clothing I owned that would be suitable for Washington. Now, looking around the airport, I realized my heaviest jacket would look scanty. The larger case – the rest of my wardrobe, and odds and ends – probably wouldn’t be unpacked for a while, maybe not even the rest of the year.They appeared and Charlie took both of them, refusing to let me help. I deferred to his knowledge of the exits, and we walked in silence toward the parking garages. I began to feel anxious about the silence, but of course this was just Charlie. My mother would have been asking me a million inane questions – she was, I felt my phone buzzing with texts in my pocket – but Charlie just wouldn’t.My luggage fit easily into the trunk of Charlie’s cruiser. We were underground in the garage, however I could tell immediately just from the texture of the air that it was raining. And that it was much colder than I had anticipated. It was September, and in Phoenix that meant eighty degrees in the shade. I sat in the passenger seat and crossed my arms over my chest, shivering already.The cruiser shook as Charlie levered himself in next to me. The inside smelled like leather and dust. I had very much not missed this car – it was why I had saved up everything from my summer job to buy a new car here. I refused to be driven around in something with red and blue flashing lights.Charlie put the key in the ignition but didn’t turn. He sat there for a moment, palms on his knees.“I’m glad you’re here, Bella,” he said, clearing his throat again. “Real glad.”My throat didn’t want to work right away. I struggled. “Me, too,” I finally spat, reminding myself that I was not allowed to call him Charlie to his face. Renée had made me promise.He started the engine and drove in his careful, exact manner until we were out of the garage and in the misting rain. Oncoming headlights blinded me. The drive from here – at Seattle’s doorstep – to Forks was a long and winding one, down the Sound and over the Narrows Bridge. Charlie had sports radio on, then he tuned it to hard rock. The swiveling rod was bereft of its police laptop, there were a few heavy things vaguely slumping around the barricaded back seats. The car was probably unused to anything more exciting than a drunkard being driven home by Charlie, who undoubtedly knew his wife and all his kids by name.For the first few miles, Charlie was too focused on navigating traffic to say anything. It wasn’t until I could see the shining lights of Seattle in the side-view that he turned the radio down and relaxed back into his seat.“I found a good car for you,” he said. “Cheap, too.”I blinked. “What?”“Chevy,” he supplied.I was very much surprised, and suspicious of the way he said ‘for you’. “Where did you find it?”He checked something in the mirror, correcting his 10-2 on the steering wheel. “You remember Billy Black, don’t you?”“Yeah,” I said. Sandcastles and fried fish. “Um, yeah! Billy and Jacob.”“That’s him, yeah.”I remembered sounds, not faces. I spent most of my Charlie visits with my nose stuck in a book. When I pictured Forks in my head, it was really probably more of the Quileute reservation – and its beaches at La Push – that I was thinking of. Lots of fishing. Lots of me throwing tantrums about the fishing.“He’s in a wheelchair now,” Charlie continued. “Can’t drive anymore, and he offered to sell it to me cheap.”“What year is it?” I asked, because that was the kind of question a person knowledgeable about cars would ask.Charlie’s expression tightened slightly, like he hoped I wouldn’t ask. “Well, he’s done a lot of work on the engine – it’s only a few years old, really.”“Only a few?”“He bought it in 1984, I think.”I bit my lip. This was a good thing. A cheap car was what I needed. But if something went wrong with it, I would be stuck.  “Actually,” I said, “I worked at that restaurant all summer and I saved a lot, so I thought I would – ““Really, Bella, the thing runs fine. They don’t build them like that anymore.”The Thing. A promising nickname. “Okay. How much?”“I kind of already…bought it. For you. A homecoming gift. Late birthday gift.”Homecoming. What a word! I absorbed it for a long silent minute. My sinuses burned and I felt tears coming on. I had to look toward the window so Charlie didn’t see. No need to freak him out – I was just exhausted.“You didn’t need to,” I told him when I could. “I saved up.”“I don’t mind,” he said with a shrug. “Keep on saving it. I don’t want you to work – well, you know, you’re eighteen, now, so you can make your own decisions – but I want you to focus on school while you’re here, okay? Gotta finish strong.”“That’s amazing, Dad,” I said, meaning it. “I really appreciate it.”“Well, now, you’re welcome,” he said, gruff.___________________________ I dozed off at an uncomfortable angle. Charlie woke me for McDonalds, then I dozed off again. Three hours passed in a haze of sleep and French fries, then we were at the house.He lived in the same two-bedroom house that I had been raised in. Two uninterrupted years, the rest only custody summers. The porch light was warm yellow, throwing light across the walkway and onto the car. The Thing.I practically pressed my nose to the glass as Charlie pulled in alongside it. Chilly night air pricked at my sleep-warm limbs as I got out to take a closer look.I could see into the cab, but barely. If I saw a car this size in any lot my eyes would slide right over it as an impossibility. I was short, short was my defining feature. I was Prius-sized. Climbing into The Thing would be a feat of acrobatics by comparison to Renée’s little silver Toyota.The color was rust. The cab was overlarge and bulbous, shaped as no modern cars were shaped. It looked its age and more, but something about that struck me as right. I touched the chipping paint, thinking the skin of my forefinger might freeze to it like a tongue on a light pole.My car. The Thing.“I love it,” I said, sounding as surprised as I felt. Charlie was standing on the other side of the cruiser (which I would be riding in no more), watching me.“I’m glad,” he said, looking it. He tapped his hand. “Want to take it for a spin?”That intimidated me. I shook my head. “Too hazardous. I’m too tired.”He nodded, tapping his hand harder on the police car. “Alright. Let’s unload.”It was one trip. Charlie let us through the door and into the warm foyer.I looked around instinctively, head on a swivel. Something was different. Warmer, homier. The house smelled like cinnamon or something. Foyer, same, living room, same. Tatty rugs and heirloom quilts. So different from Renée’s attempts at minimalism and Home Goods. I even looked in the kitchen on the way to the central staircase, and that was the same. Charlie had gotten a single fern for the windowsill, though, and that was interesting.We tromped up the stairs to the second landing, which consisted of one long hall with access to an attic and a bathroom at the far end and two bedroom doors facing each other across scuffed hardwood. Cinnamon became the smell of freshly washed laundry.The door on the right side was mine. It had always been mine. The walls were painted lilac, the ceiling a little peaked. My Disney Princess coverlet was gone, replaced with a plain beige duvet and white sheets. The desk by the window had been cleared of the box computer and phone line. On it was an unopened phone charger, mechanical pencils, and about five spiral notebooks.Charlie saw me looking. “Your mother said you had your own laptop now.”I had the crying feeling again, but that shook me out of it. “I do. You talked to mom?”“Of course,” he said. “You think all this was going on and we wouldn’t…talk about it?”I raised my eyebrows. “The car. That’s how you knew. She told you.”“She mentioned it.”It was surprised they had talked, and that Renée hadn’t brought it up to me. “Thank you,” I said. “For – for having me.”“You’re my daughter,” Charlie said firmly.One of the best things about my father is he doesn’t hover. He left me to unpack and get settled, a feat that would have been altogether impossible for my mother. It was nice to be alone; a relief to pull things from my bags and dully set them into place for the morning (which I did not let myself think about). I got texts from Phoenix people – friends, but the ties would not bind.I called Renée and told her about the car. She pretended to be surprised. Then she bid me to recount my journey in great detail for her, Phil timing in every few minutes to chide Renée for not letting me get to bed.“You’re not really going to school tomorrow,” Renée said to me conspiratorially. “After a day of traveling! You’ll fall asleep in every class.”I made a noncommittal sound, throwing things on the bed that I would need to shower. “Just like Phoenix.”“Hardy har. Okay, Bella, honey, Phil is tapping his watch like he does.”“Phil is looking out for my best interests. I’m going to go to bed.”“Bella,” she said again, more serious. “Are you feeling okay?”“Yeah,” I lied. “I’m – I’m good. Or I will be once I sleep. God willing.”“Okay, message received. I love you, baby.”I returned the sentiment, then I hung up.Thankfully, none of the mysterious – possibly feminine – influence from the first floor had made its way up here. The bathroom was all Charlie. Fitting my bath things in next to his sparse toilette felt strange. Usually when I was here I didn’t bother to unpack, just left my suitcase open on the bedroom floor and picked out what I needed.There was a blue toothbrush in a holder on the sink, and an unscented container of antibacterial soap. The shower curtain was gray, a plasticky odor suggesting that the liner behind it was new. On the small window over the toilet, there was a sole piece of decoration – another fern. I had to wait for the hot water to kick up, standing on the cold tile with my hand stuck into the freezing cold shower stream. I caught sight of myself in the mirror, naked and haggard.In preparation for Washington weather, I had spent the last week by the pool with Renée between our respective packing. She and Phil were moving to Florida in five days, and after that we would be farther apart than we ever had been in my entire life.So Charlie was right, I was tan. But only a little darker than normal.A flash of anxiety lit up in my stomach, beneath the exhaustion. Despite Renée’s warning, I was going to school in the morning. No reason to put it off, I had already missed a few weeks of the semester. But Forks High School, like Forks, was unreasonably small. It had just three hundred and fifty-seven – now fifty-eight – students; there were more than seven hundred people in my junior class alone back home. All of the kids here had grown up together. Hell, their grandparents had been toddlers together. I would be the new girl, something to stare at and whisper about.My mom always said she stuck out like a sore thumb in Forks for her personality as much as her appearance. Dark Hawaiian skin, long black hair, outgoing to a fault and innately rebellious. My resemblance to her ended with the skin and hair, and my personality, as she loved to tell me, was all Charlie.I had my mother’s wide cheekbones, wide hips, and her total lack of height. Charlie had passed down congenital awkwardness and terminal lack of grace. The only physical link between us was the same thick dark eyebrows and eye color – gray. Silvery in Phoenix and dull in Forks.The water began to burn my fingertips. I got in. Washing the grime off made me feel more human, but also that much more tired as I shivered my way into shorts and a tee. Unsure of what else to do to put it off, I found Charlie downstairs in the living room and told him goodnight. He hugged me again.Panic found me as I crawled beneath the duvet. The bed felt like heaven after my long day, but I couldn’t fall asleep. I pressed my face into the pillow and lost it. Something about the house – the Forks, the cruiser, the Charlie, the task ahead of me at Forks High – put me on edge.Even though I was already eighteen and the custody agreement was thoroughly over, I felt like a child. A stupid child.I went to Forks for Charlie. School was a by-product, a necessity. Regardless of where I was living, I needed a diploma. It was either new school in Florida or new school in Forks, so the point was very nearly moot, it was just the complete lack of anonymity I would be afforded here, in the smallest of towns, that frightened me.I thought of Charlie, sitting down in the living room watching ESPN alone every night for the past six years, and how little I had called him. It was just after ten o’clock that my body gave up the fight, and I fell into a jet-lagged slumber so deep it hurt.___________________ Rain pattered against my window, waking me up in groggy stages. The alarm on my phone went off and I silenced it immediately, struggling to the surface of my duvet cocoon. There had not been enough sleep, I knew immediately from the nausea curling in my gut. The light oozing from my window was weak and dim, shaped like the drips of rain that coated the outside of the glass. The effect was claustrophobic and not conducive to getting me out of bed.I had planned my outfit ahead when packing, so it was sitting at the top of the suitcase’s contents. Dark jeans and a thin gray turtleneck, with a larger green short-sleeved button up over it. Two layers in Phoenix would have been laughable, and usually when anyone wore a turtleneck it was cause to wonder how many hickeys they were trying to hide from their parents. I took the black jacket I had bought a week previous and tugged it over my arms. The school supplies from Charlie I swept into my backpack with my wallet and keys.He was downstairs at the kitchen table with – honest to God – a newspaper. He set it aside when I walked in, standing nervously in his work uniform.“I made coffee – you drink coffee?”“Yes,” I said, making an aborted movement toward the coffeemaker. “I can – ““I’ve got it,” he said easily, waving a hand. I took the empty seat at the table, rain lashing at the window inches from my face. In the daylight, everything was green and mossy. Through the streaking water I saw the yard to the side of the house and the thick forest that started up right at the edge of it. The window radiated cold.“I’ve got cereal,” Charlie said. “Oatmeal, got a toaster…” He sat a Forks Sheriff’s Department mug in front of me. “Didn’t cook you anything, just ‘cause I know jet-lag messes with my stomach. Creamer?”I looked at him, realizing that he had taken the Phoenix-Seattle flight much more often than I had. “Please,” I said. “Thank – Thank you. Just the coffee is fine.”He set down a can of powder creamer, which I tipped into my mug. The coffee was tar. I liked it.“You’re sure you’ve got everything you need?” Charlie asked, sitting back down.“For school? Oh, yeah, I’m sure. I emailed the school and looked at the syllabi that they sent me.”His eyebrows shot up high. “You did all that?”“Just an email,” I said, shrugging.“Wow,” he said, amazed. “Alright then. And you feel okay taking the truck? You know how to drive in the rain, don’t you?”I had driven in the rain one time, in Phoenix, and it was a very light drizzle. Not the downpour happening outside. But there was absolutely no chance of me being dropped off on the first day in Charlie’s cop car.“I can drive in the rain,” I assured him. Then, realizing he didn’t know, “I’m a good driver. Phil taught me.”The metaphorical flashbang of that sentence descended on the breakfast table like noxious gas. I sucked in a breath, choking on my coffee. Charlie just kind of nodded, kind of smiled, looking away at the window while I coughed.“What I’m saying is,” I started, trying desperately to bring it back, “I don’t drive like – like Mom.”Charlie’s eyes crinkled at the edges in a way that could have been mirth or pain. “Can’t say that’s not a relief.”A beat. I drowned my sorrows with more tar. Charlie looked at his watch.“I better get headed to work. The truck’s key is on the counter for you. Here.” He stood and handed it to me, large and plain. No fob for The Thing.  “I should be home around five. I thought we’d have dinner at the diner, if you weren’t too tired from school.”I nodded. “Sure, that sounds great, Dad!”He nodded, pale cheeks going pink over his thick moustache. The foyer was annexed to the kitchen, a five-step wide detour from kitchen to living room with the staircase right behind it. He unhooked the utility belt from the foyer wall – faded black leather with holsters and pockets. My eyes stuck to the gun buttoned in, covered seconds later as Charlie shrugged into a massive overcoat.“I’ll have my phone on,” he called to me, buttoning that up. “So you just call me if anything comes up.”“I will,” I promised.“Have a good day at school,” he said. “I love you, Bells.”“I love you,” I said.When the door slammed shut, I dropped my head into my hands, breathing hard. Fantastic. My first day here, and I’d chased Charlie out the door by bringing up Phil. And Renée. Not that Charlie had any sort of problem with Phil – the two were perfectly polite to each other – but ‘hey, remember how my stepfather had to teach me how to drive because you weren’t there?’ did not seem the best way to do what I had come here to do.I had another cup of coffee, sipping it as I searched through Charlie’s cabinets and the fridge. Mostly empty. There was the promised oatmeal, a bag of flour that looked older than me, Corn Flakes, and sundry canned goods. The fridge concealed a gallon of milk, eggs, frozen sausages, some Tupperware and aluminum foil-wrapped mysteries, and a plentiful amount of Rainier beer.Stuck to the front of the fridge with silver magnets were postcards and pictures of me. There were holiday cards from people I didn’t know – probably coworkers – and then one of Charlie standing with a tall, raven-haired man whose face sparked my interest. The picture was old, faded. At Charlie’s knee was a brown girl with pigtails and Gap overalls. At Billy Black’s hip was a taller, browner boy with a wide grin and one of his front teeth missing.Behind that one was a photo of Charlie and Renée on the same couch in the same living room of this house that was there now. They had me in their arms, a baby wearing a Santa hat and swaddled in candy stripes.I gave up after that, sitting back down and flipping through social media until the clock showed an appropriate time for me to leave. I fastened Thing’s key to my keyring and shouldered my backpack, waiting anxiously at the door to see if the rain would let up for a moment or two. It did not.Rain was unpleasant to me, as was the smell of it. As I ran across the gravel with my umbrella up, all I could think was that rain smelled like rot. The drops were cold and thick and outside of jet-lag comas the noise would definitely be keeping me up at night. My fingers slipped on the key, fit it into the lock, and I was in. I heaved my damp body up into the seat and shut the umbrella with great difficulty, slamming the door shut against the elements.Rain continued to beat against the metal roof of the car, but I was safe. I set the umbrella in the footwell on the passenger side and maneuvered my backpack into the seat. My jacket and jeans were not protecting me overmuch from the cold seat leather. I sat and looked around for a second. It smelled like leather, and something else earthy and smoky. Everything was clean, if old, and I realized with a falling heart that there would be no way to play music on my phone. Renée’s car had Bluetooth, an amenity this car forewent in favor of personality and experience.The car engine started up quickly and loudly, roaring into life so suddenly I jumped and had to laugh at myself. The Thing was ridiculous.I put my destination into Google Maps – one turn onto the highway, one into the school’s parking lot – and put the car in reverse. The engine felt too powerful, too leonine. I pressed the gas carefully and shot out into the street, just barely whipping the wheel in time to avoid hitting Charlie’s mailbox. I looked all around to make sure no one had seen me, then pressed it again, this time in forward. The car made a grudging noise and took off at a more manageable speed. I lifted the pressure even more, picturing myself hydroplaning into the forest. The radio fuzzed until I tuned it in on classic rock – not ideal, but my phone’s speakers on their own couldn’t overpower the sound of the rain.Forks High, to its credit, did not look like the prison-adjacent institution I went to in Phoenix. It was a collection of matching buildings, built with maroon brick and dark green roofs. I could hardly see its size through the scattered greenery. It probably didn’t even have metal detectors.The first building I saw had the words FRONT OFFICE emblazoned on the overhang. The lot was almost entirely empty. I parked and ran inside holding my umbrella like a sword. Opening the door blasted hot air in my face, admitting me to a small, huddled little office. The walls were painted golden yellow, two aged chairs bracketing the little waiting space in front of a long desk. The walls were full of corkboards and framed documents and plaques.An older woman with graying blonde hair in a towering bouffant was seated behind the counter. She looked up when I entered, then did a double take.“Can I help you?” She asked. It sounded more like, ‘you are Bella Swan, daughter of Chief Swan’.I gave her my name. She nodded before I had finished. “Of course,” she said, and dug through a pile of papers. “I have your schedule right here, Isabella, and a map of the school.”I took the papers, not bothering to correct her use of my full name. She pointed out my classes for me with a marker and told me that she hoped I would like it here in Forks. I gave her a smile and returned to Thing, flinching again at the sound of the engine starting. People were beginning to arrive, driving past to the bigger lot where the secretary had told me to park. I followed them very carefully, thinking that this truck would easily crush a smaller and more expensive car.With fifteen minutes until the bell, people were leaving their cars and congregating in groups. Some were not even armed with umbrellas, they just strolled through the rain like it was nothing. And they were all white. Caucasian, Anglo-Saxon, Pacific Northwest white. Any hope I had of blending in dissolved into the fine mist that was fogging up my windshield.“You’re being ridiculous,” I said to myself. “It’s just two semesters.”My jacket had a hood. I pulled it up and pulled my hair forward. As close to wearing a paper bag over my head as I could get. My first class was English, which was a good omen. I used the map to plot my way to building three and then stuffed it into my backpack. With my umbrella, no one would notice me.Building three was near the lot, connected to the other buildings by covered walkways. I followed two girls in raincoats inside and down the linoleum hall to classroom 310. People were taking their seats and mingling, so I snuck up to the teacher and pulled my hood down. He was a balding guy who just looked at me blankly until I said my name. That got his attention.Thankfully, he didn’t make a big deal. Just told me to have a seat anywhere. I fled to the back of the room, but people were already staring. There was definitely whispering. I modulated against my anxiety and found that, yes, there was definitely an amount of whispering and staring that most would consider anxiety-inducing.I dug out one of my empty notebooks and started writing, trying to look busy. When Mr. Hughes called class to order, everyone took seats. I didn’t look at the guy who sat next to me until he leaned closer and whispered, “Hey, I’m Eric.”He was Asian, I noticed with interest and maybe even relief. “I’m Bella. Hi.”“I know,” he said. Then class started and he turned forward. I noticed four other people who had fully turned in their seats to look at me.Mr. Hughes passed out a stack of reading lists. I had already read them at home – Bronte, Shakespeare, Chaucer, Faulkner. Most of it I had already read and reported on in my advanced placement classes in Phoenix. I wondered if re-using those would be unethical.There was a short lecture on reading literature critically, which I kept notes on but mostly tuned out. I was too busy thinking about the other classes I would have to sit through.At the bell, Eric rose with me. “Where are you going next?”I checked my map. “Building six.”We filed out into the hallway, where all the people who hadn’t yet seen me craned their necks. Eric said, very eagerly, “I’m headed toward four! I could show you the way, if you want.”I nodded and smiled, trying to look anywhere but the curious faces around us. “I’d appreciate it.”The rain had picked up, and Eric pulled out an umbrella. He held it over me without getting in my personal space.“So, this is a lot different than Phoenix, huh?” He called over the wind.I decided to resign myself now to the fact that everyone already knew my business. “Very.”“Does it ever rain there?”“Three or four times a year.”“What’s that like?” He wondered aloud with a hint of sarcasm.“Sunny.”“I can tell,” he said, looking down at me. “You’re…tan!”“My mother’s part albino,” I joked, and then cringed.Eric smiled apprehensively, confused. I regretted every decision that had ever led me to this point. No more jokes, Bella.He walked me to a building closer to the gym, all the way to the door.“Good luck,” he said as I grabbed the handle. “Maybe we’ll have another class together?”“Maybe. Thank you, Eric.”He waved and turned away. The rest of my morning passed in the same fashion. My Trig teacher, Mr. Varner, made me stand in front of the class and introduce myself. This was, quite literally, my worst nightmare. I stuttered and blushed my way through my own name and tripped on the way to my seat. I sat next to a girl who, in a whisper, told me her name was Angela and assured me her class introduction had gone much worse.After Spanish, where Angela also sat with me, I started to recognize some faces. Between classes, waiting on the teacher to start lecture, there was always someone braver than the rest who would introduce themselves and ask me the same questions. I tried to be diplomatic, but their interest was never curbed. It felt like talking to an audience who would all start laughing as soon as I turned my back.I got called Isabella again and again. This confirmed my suspicion that absolutely everyone had been talking about my arrival. The half-day mark passed with my silent exultation. After Spanish was lunch. Angela walked with me to the cafeteria. She was about my height, with straight brown hair and cat-eye glasses. Somehow, she was making small talk with me that wasn’t about me. I clung to her like a life raft as we entered the massive room filled with tables.Angela took me to her table, where her friends were very nice and welcoming. I felt stares and whispers, but for the first time that day I felt slightly protected from them by tentative new acquaintanceship. The only names I caught were Mike, Jessica, and Ben. The rest slipped into obscurity almost as soon as they were mentioned.I was the only one who had to go through the lunch line – I would need to go grocery shopping soon – but Jessica offered to stand in line with me. She was taller than me, as pale as Angela but with lighter hair and a less bookish vibe. Her skin was glossy and dewy and she wore bright purple eyeliner. She talked fast and with much too much pep, quizzing me on my move from Phoenix.“So, it’s, like, super hot there?”“Yes.”“Did you have a boyfriend?”“No.”“Ugh, there are no hot guys at this school. Were there a lot of hot guys in Phoenix?”On the way back to our table with my tray, Eric waved at me from another table. Hands occupied, I smiled back, shrugging my shoulders in a way that conveyed nothing and made my cheeks burn. I looked away from him, quickly, and my eyes fell on a table in the far corner.I looked away from the people at the table. I sat down next to Jessica and across from Angela, puzzling over what I had just seen.Trying not to be obvious, I turned to look over my shoulder at them again. Just to be sure.Five people. None of them were looking at me, which was a nice change. They were talking, deep in some conversation and ignoring their trays of food. One of them was Black – I noticed this, but it wasn’t what I was captivated by. He was big, muscled like a weight lifter. If Forks High had a football team, I was sure he was on it. Next to him was a smaller guy, slim but also tall. He had a tan, more so than almost everyone else, and short blonde curls.Next to the big guy was a girl whose beauty stunned me – long, perfectly white, blonde hair cascaded down her back, glistening where the florescent lights should have dulled it. The girl next to the blonde guy seemed her opposite in every way. She was tiny, elfin and a little pudgy. Asian. Her dark hair was cut incredibly short and pinned with multicolored clips and barrettes. She was wearing a neon dress shirt with puffy shoulders.There was a third girl, as well. She seemed to be observing the others, chin in hand. Her long hair was a pale, gingery red. She seemed athletic in build, and very long.I stared at them because something was wrong. Though they all looked different from each other, they also looked different than any other living beings I had ever seen. Something about the skin. They glowed, like pregnant women or people who worked out and owned a juicer. Only it wasn’t health, exactly, that they glowed with. There were circles beneath their eyes, which were all dark, like they had not slept in days.They didn’t belong in Forks. Their faces – the blonde girl and the big guy especially – had no business in a place like this. It was beauty, simple and as complex as that. Even as I sat there, looking, I tried to reason myself out of it. How could I be so struck by something so vain? What did it matter?As I watched, the small girl rose with her tray and walked to the trash cans. She was wearing platform heels. Her gait was quick and overtly, horribly graceful. She dumped her food and left through the back doors.I turned to Jessica, uneasy. “Who are they?”Jessica followed my jerked thumb. We both looked to the table, and suddenly the redheaded girl was looking at me. It was strange, as she had to turn her head almost ninety degrees. She looked up, cold, disinterested, like someone had called her name. Her eyes went to Jessica, and then to me.I turned quickly forward, face burning.Jessica burst into giggles and put her hands on her cheeks, seemingly as affected as I was. “They,” she said in a low whisper, “are the Cullens.”“The Cullens,” I repeated. “Like a…family?”“Edythe and Emmett Cullen,” Jessica listed with glee, “and Rosalie and Jasper Hale. And Alice Cullen, but I don’t know where she is.”I wanted to turn around again. I didn’t dare.“I don’t know about family, though,” Jessica was saying. “They’re, like…together. Jasper and Alice. Emmett and Rosalie. Everyone knows it.”She spoke with vengeful, small-town condemnation. Only I was certain these people would cause talk in Phoenix, too.“They’re adopted,” Angela told me. She was also whispering, now. “They live with Dr. Cullen and his wife outside town.”“Yeah, yeah,” Jessica said, waving her hand. “Doesn’t make it less weird.”Angela changed the topic of conversation in a forceful way. Maybe she didn’t condone gossip. Shame, I found I wanted to know more about the incestual supermodels.When the bell rang, I allowed myself to look one more time. The Cullens were starting to leave, like everyone else but looking much better doing it.“Which one has red hair?” I asked impulsively. Just as I said it, the redhead looked over at us again. This time, her eyes went directly to me and stayed there. I froze like a sighted deer. Her face, which in full view was rather severe, twitched in annoyance.It passed so quickly I thought I imagined it. The girl was following her siblings from the lunchroom.“That’s Edythe,” Jessica said, speaking louder as the door closed behind them. “I don’t really have anything nice to say about her.”Angela met my eye and smirked. I set my tray on a stack as we left. I knew me and Angela also had Biology together, so I let her lead the way.“They moved here a few years ago,” Angela said to me. The rain had died down just a bit, so people were meandering the grounds instead of scurrying through walkways. “People like to talk, but I don’t think its deserved. No one knows much about them, anyway.”I nodded, feeling pity and relief. Pity because they, as striking as they were, were also outsiders. Relief because I wasn’t the only newcomer, and by far the least interesting.Biology was in building five, in a lab room. Angela smiled apologetically at me and went to one of the black topped tables. Assigned seats. Great. All of the tables were filled except one. Edythe Cullen sat next to the only open seat. Seeing her here, unexpected, startled me to no end. Without the diluting effect of siblings she was too demanding on the eye.Further nightmare fuel. I didn’t want to sit next to her. I didn’t know how to talk to someone like her.I walked over to introduce myself to my teacher, Mrs. Banner. I had to walk past Edythe to do so, and as I did something happened. Edythe – who had been sitting idly, not looking at me – went rigid. I saw it in the corner of my eye.Mrs. Banner handed me a textbook and directed me to sit next to “Ms. Cullen”. I had no choice but to turn.Edythe Cullen was glaring at me. There was no mistaking the absolute hostility behind her gaze. I stopped, struck by it, then I must have gone into shock. There was nothing to do but to sit next to her, right? I had to be imagining the look she was giving me.Her eyes were black. It made no sense against her fair coloring. There was a point where she stopped following me with her gaze. I pulled out the empty chair and sat.Edythe Cullen shifted immediately, pulling her chair as far as possible from me at the small table. I could see her hands clenched into fists in her lap. I stopped being anxious about school, and about the fact that my next class was physical education. I didn’t care that Eric hadn’t liked my joke or that I had gotten food on my shirt at lunch.I was just confused. There was nothing I had done, nothing I could have done, that would make someone look at me like that. It was out of my hands. Not my fault.I looked at her twice as class started and Banner started reviewing the syllabus. She didn’t let up in her posture. She did not open her book or take a note. At one point it looked like her hands were trembling. I almost introduced myself to her, just to be contrarian, but something in me told me not to.The bell rang what felt like hours later. Edythe was up and out of the room like a shot. Just – gone.I was completely shocked, and exhausted. Being on high alert for an hour plus was hard on the nervous system.“Hey,” said Mike from lunch, appearing at my lab table. “Need help finding your next class?”I endured physical education class – it was just a slideshow on P.E. theory, or whatever, and us walking in circles for thirty minutes. I thought about Biology the entire time, even after returning home and unpacking more, even driving to the diner with Charlie. He asked me how my day was and I could only say it went well.The diner was an old fashioned, long and narrow ex-soda shop at the center of town. The waitress knew Charlie and gushed over me. I conversed with her on autopilot, too preoccupied to be anxious or nervous.I ordered a spinach salad. Charlie got a burger and fries. He had changed out of his uniform, at least.“Do you know the Cullens?” I asked him.“The Cullen family? Sure, Dr. Cullen’s a great man. He works at the hospital.”I looked down at my water. “They don’t seem to fit in very well at school.”Charlie surprised me by looking angry.“People in this town,” He muttered. “Dr. Cullen could probably work anywhere in the world and make ten times the salary he does here. We’re lucky to have him – lucky his wife wanted to live in a small town. You know, I had my doubts when they moved down here with all these adopted teenagers, but they’ve never given me any trouble. People just want to talk because they’re newcomers.”His vehement approval troubled me. I nodded along, willing to believe him about Dr. Cullen, but really I was thinking about those black eyes and clenched fists.________________________

Edythe

Being a vampire was simple. Too many years of life ground it down to this: master your thirst, master yourself. Drink the blood of animals and find yourself able to sustain a simulacrum of humanity. The appearance of a complication startled me. Now, like the animal I was, I ran from the threat.Somewhere West of the Canadian border, the forests grew thicker and more silent. I focused on my destination. It had been hours, and all my brain could process was the girl and her blood. I could smell it as vividly as when she was next to me. I wanted it.I let out a shriek of animal pain as my thirst roiled and burned. Half a mile away, a group of birds took flight in alarm, their little hearts pounding as hers had pounded.An hour of running passed, and I began to laugh at myself. Out here in the snow, it was easy. I had almost blown our cover and ruined everything. Over blood. My brain warred against itself, one half wanting to go back and finish what was started, one half rolling its eyes at the base desire. I was a higher being than that. I thought I was.It was nearing morning when I crossed onto my family’s land. My feet sank into the deep snow, slowing me.“It’s Edythe!” I called across the lawn when it opened in front of me. I knew Carlisle had called ahead.Up the incline, nestled into the trees, was a cottage. A large one, but one that retained a homely warmth to its snow-covered eaves and shuttered windows. The lights were on and the two inhabitants reacted to my voice. I heard their thoughts and was absurdly relieved – it seemed the girl, the blood bag, was not indicative of a mental lapse on my part. She was immune to my gifts of some inner flaw of her own.Finally, Tanya thought from somewhere inside the house. Her mind was warm with anticipation. Kate was the one to open the door. A rectangle of orange light shot across the snow. I stepped into it, waving nervously. Already I was embarrassed at my situation.“You look like hell,” Kate said. Her blonde hair was braided intricately around her head, body shrouded in a pale sweater and skirt. She really ran away, she thought to herself as an afterthought. Her mind tinged with apology because she knew I could hear. You can’t blame me for being surprised!I could not blame her for that. “Is it just the two of you?” I asked.Everyone else is out hunting, Kate explained crossing her arms. I’m surprised you didn’t come across them. Good for you, though, they may have mistaken you for a wild boar.That was the second mention of my appearance. I saw a reflection of myself in her thoughts, and laughed, touching my hair.“I ran fast,” I said, pulling out a twig and shaking free some leaves. I had run through a tree or two, maybe, letting the impact soothe me. Or perhaps that had been another attempt to stop myself, to turn back and indulge. The rest of the time I ran like I was being chased.“Did you?” Tanya asked, stepping into view. She looked at me. “Wow.”“I didn’t come here to be attacked,” I said, dropping my hands from my ruined hair.Tanya held her hands up in surrender, eyes narrowing. “It’s a good look on you, really. So décomposé.” Charming.I looked up at her warily. Tanya and her…inclinations did not bother me except where they were directed at me. The fault was with me for being so offended. People could not control their thoughts.The wind coming in off the hill changed direction. I stumbled back from the draft of warmth from inside the house. My throat burst into flames in a weak recreation of the day before. The scent was a few days old, here.“I hope I didn’t intrude,” I said. My voice sounded strangled.Tanya and Kate watched me flinch with increasing concern. Of course I knew that the two of them entertained relations with humans – this was their eccentricity among our kind – but I couldn’t afford any mistakes. I would have heard a human heartbeat from a mile off, I reminded myself, and I would have stayed far away.She doesn’t want to talk about it, Kate observed. “Two days ago,” she said. “The heating system captures the smell a while. It was Tanya’s.”Tanya smirked at her sister and her mind conjured an image of the human in question. A man, mid-thirties, solidly built and eager to please. I didn’t appreciate the images she showed me.“Will you come in, Eddie?” Kate asked, pushing the door open.I shook my head. The smell was too much. “I’ll go look for the others. Hunting sounds like a good idea. If you would like to join…”Their eyes, unlike mine, were a light topaz. I only asked to be polite. Naturally, Tanya straightened up.“I’d love to!” She said, skipping down the wooden steps barefoot.I hid my disappointment. Tanya was family, and all it entailed. “Dibs on lions.”“Have fun, then,” Kate said, closing the door. I’ll open up some windows, she thought to me.Tanya suggested we head East. We took off that direction. She kept pace with me, wearing only a light pink sundress. With her short blonde hair she was the perfect image of summer. We were not humans, the cold couldn’t touch us, but somehow she looked indecent.Unusually quiet, she thought, glancing over at me. Will she tell me the full story? Carlisle was vague.I ignored this. Thankfully, Tanya said nothing aloud until I had taken down a black bear, and then another, and then two elk. Predator mammals were preferred. I had run past multiple big cats on the way here, though, because I had been scared of wasting their blood like I had just wasted this elk’s. The blood was thick and warm. It did nothing to soothe the scorching pain in my throat. I had not felt this way since first starting the animal diet.I threw the elk down, making sure to rip out its throat to remove any identifying marks.Tanya was leaning back on a snowbank, arms beneath her head, waiting on me. I went back to her and copied her pose. The snow propped us up so we could see dawn cresting over the mountains. The perfect cold of my body kept the snow a pillow of ice crystals. Tanya had been quiet, but I was tired of her niggling curiosity at the back of my mind.“Go ahead,” I said.Finally. She rolled to her side, reaching to pick more debris from my hair. “Carlisle said it was a close call.”That annoyed me. I had amazing self-control, especially when compared to vampires like Jasper who still struggled to hide his discomfort. I rarely felt discomfort around humans. At a blood-lust level, anyway. Many of them irritated me with their thoughts. Now my credibility was dust.I didn’t know how to explain it to Carlisle after I rushed home from school. I could barely open my gritted teeth to speak, and his wide-eyed alarm only exacerbated my panic.“What happened?” He had asked, careful not to touch me. My father knew what the edge of control looked like. “Edythe?”“I have to – go,” I’d spat at him. “Out of town.”Understanding dawned. Carlisle had assumed the worst.“I didn’t!” I said, desperate to at least have him understand that. “I didn’t – I can’t – I have to go now.”I had left after Biology. My siblings wouldn’t know I had gone until the end of the school day. I was not sure why Alice wasn’t there, why she didn’t warn me. It was too much to my own credit to think it was because I was too strong to really decide to kill. Clearly that was not the case.In the intervening hours, I realized I knew exactly what had happened.“Someone I hadn’t met before,” I murmured to the sky, closing my eyes. “It was immediate. It was the blood.”Tanya inhaled deeply. “Ah,” she said. “Galdr blóð.”This was her native Old Norse. I found meaning in her underlying thoughts.“Singing blood, yes. The Italians call them i cantante. I didn’t think it would happen…to me.”And sing it had. The smell of the girl flooded the whole room, flooded every part of my being. It was a wonder I had not caught it during lunch. I was so focused on not being able to hear her thoughts that the blood would have taken me. Two unprecedented things at once would have been too much, I was sure. At least I had been allowed five minutes to recover from the first one.“It hasn’t happened to me,” Tanya said, whining. “Only Kate. Ages ago.”I knew this, vaguely. At this point I had heard so many of the sisters’ stories I disregarded them as exaggeration or myth. They predated Carlisle by centuries and me by a millennium. Emmett, my brother, had described something similar once, but at the time he had been a newborn and I wasn’t sure he hadn’t just taken something he wanted. It was his way.She didn’t even think about stopping, Tanya thought. It was over in a few seconds, and she was destroyed with guilt for decades.It was impossible to live as long as they had without making mistakes. If I had taken the girl’s life, I would feel guilty only for ruining my family’s stability. Especially Carlisle who, was integrating more fully than any time in recent memory.“Was it terrible?” Tanya asked me. She was grinning.“Excruciating.”“What were they like, this human?” She asked next. A boy?“Girl.” I frowned at her next thought. “Why would it matter?”These things tend to present themselves, over time, she thought.I stood up. “This again.”She looked at me from her cross-legged position on the ground, unperturbed. “Why does it irritate you so, Eddie?”She was making this about me and her. Or the lack thereof. It was in her thoughts consistently enough to grate at me. The bond between me and my family in Forks, the rest of the Denali coven, was so purely familial. Knowing Tanya didn’t really return the feeling unmoored me. I knew not what to do with it.“Stay out of my head if you don’t like my thoughts,” Tanya said quietly, turning her face away. She was sorry that I saw it, or at least sorry that it hurt me. “We can be sisters if you like. You don’t need to take it to heart.” I’ve had thousands of lovers.“Your thoughts are loud,” I said.“You can have latent proclivities. They don’t need to consume you. I just see a pattern, that’s all.”She saw my lack of male lovers as a sign of something else. In Tanya’s world, life was a revolving door of bodies. Kate wasn’t much different, but she didn’t look at me like the next in line.“I am a century old,” I said. “I think I would know if…”“That’s not that long,” Tanya said, suddenly weary. You didn’t tell me. What is the girl like?Explaining the human’s appearance was tantamount to thinking about her, which I could not do. I used every iota of control to keep my mind focused on the here and now.“Don’t be angry with me,” Tanya pleaded, standing. “Will you stay here, wait her out?”It would be easy, staying in Denali for a year or so. Moose were good where you could get them, and I had not explored these mountains as thoroughly as back home.It felt like giving up. I thought of Carlisle, my father in all the ways that mattered, and his instant forgiveness of me. He thought I killed her and it didn’t change anything between us. I was glad Esme had not been there to see me in that state, but she would have felt the same. Their staid love pulled at something in my frozen heart.“No,” I decided, shaking my head. “I have to go back.”“You could stand it?” Don’t be a hero.“I’ll stay until the others return.” Eleazar and Carmen were more mature, turned in their thirties each. It made for more stimulating conversation than Tanya, who I could swear at times was regressing as she got older. “It’s been so long.”Tanya smiled, approving. “Shall we return? You can clean up before Carmen sees you. You know how she is about hair.”“In a short while,” I said. “Is there reception up here?”
Head North to the ridge. I’ll leave you alone.
I nodded my thanks. Tanya raced off, sending up a tall flurry of snowy powder.On a ridge overlooking the valley, I called Carlisle. He answered so quickly he must have had his phone in his hand.“I don’t want you to think I’m micromanaging,” he said immediately.This almost made me smile. “I made it. I went hunting with Tanya.”If he knew I was with Tanya, then he wouldn’t have to wonder if I had killed any wandering humans on the way here or gotten sidetracked massacring a village. Hungry vampires had done worse for less.“Good,” he said, and paused. It was always strange to talk to him on the phone. He was the most attuned to my gift and conversed with me through thought as easily as anything. He was also able to effectively stop his thoughts and derail them away from my hearing, when necessary. Unfortunately Alice was also good at this. “What do you think?”“It’s a singer. Il mio cantante.”“Bella Swan is your singer,” he said in a rueful tone. Hearing her name again surprised me. I’d forgotten she had one.“Did Alice tell you that?”“Bella Swan is the new variable,” he said. I wished he would stop saying her name. “You know who she is, Edythe.”It was all the humans of Forks had been thinking about for two weeks now. How could I not? “That’s not why I stopped myself.”“I wasn’t implying,” he countered. “I like Chief Swan. That’s all.”Chief Swan was not competent enough to detect anything about us. I tamped down a flare of rage that Carlisle was so connected with them. Personal relationship did not matter – all humans were somebody’s daughter, somebody’s father - wasn’t he going to acknowledge the fact that I had walked away from a singer?“Edythe?”“Yes,” I said. “I understand.”If vampires could cry, I might have then. “Are the others around?”“I’m at work. No.”“Carlisle,” I said, wanting him to know I had thought about it. “I am going to come back.”Silence.“I wasn’t prepared for it. Not in the moment. She sat right next to me…but now I know. I can walk away from it again.”“I don’t know how you did it the first time,” he said casually. “Walk away from Bella Swan.”I knew what he was doing. This tactic was not subtle – say the human’s name, connect with and think of her as a person, not prey. I had used this tactic on Jasper, and Rosalie.“You don’t understand.” I swallowed. “Bella Swan compromised me before I smelled her.”“What do you mean?”“Her mind is completely closed. I can’t hear a word.” When Carlisle was quiet, I continued: “It was the cafeteria. I was across the room from her. Two students were talking about us, I heard, but when I listened for the g – for Bella Swan, I found nothing.”It had never happened before. My gift was without exception. I didn’t relish disclosing a weakness.I heard Carlisle’s office chair squeak as he settled back, and I smiled in grim satisfaction. This was new, so it would interest him by default. “You were in a panic,” he suggested. “Hunger set in, and you didn’t want to listen to her thoughts. You never did.”My smile dropped. “I had five full minutes of clear-headed thought. The problem is not on my end.”Carlisle sighed. “You sound very confident.”He wouldn’t tell me not to return, even if it was what he thought was best. “I think I’ve earned it.”Carlisle and I had been at each other’s sides since 1913. We had existed before this family unit of ours was built – when acolyte described my relation to him better than daughter. That changed when Carlisle met Esme, but not by much. I was calling on that onus now, demanding him to submit to my worldview. I would defer to him as an elder, as a father, in every way but intellectually.“I’ll tell the others you’re feeling better,” he said, submitting to nothing. “Esme is worried sick.”“I won’t rush. I’m going to visit for a few days. You can tell the school I came down with strep throat. It’s been going around.”“I’ll do that. Someone’s approaching my office. Please give my regards to the family.”“I’ll do that.”I hung up. Carlisle and I did not disagree often.While I was standing among the dBm waves, delayed text messages buzzed into my phone from Alice.I didn’t see until it was happening, I swear to God, she said ten hours previous. Then, eight hours previous, I could have pulled you from class but the future was in lockstep. No room for error. You know how Jasper gets when it’s down to the wire like that. If you heard me coming the instinct might have pushed you to act.She was correct. If another vampire had come near the human, I would have felt threatened by competition.I trusted you, Alice wrote. And you rose to the occasion. Don’t beat yourself up.I didn’t read the rest of her correspondence. She had bolstered my existing opinion, and right then that was all I wanted to hear. I was strong enough.I wouldn’t hide up here. Not from a human.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Bella
Edythe Cullen did not come to school on Tuesday. I was a ball of anxiety for the first half of the day, even though it went quite well. Strangers were still staring at me a lot, but I realized Jessica was in my first block English class. I sat with her instead of Eric. Something about her, brusque and inquisitive as she was, was likeable. She gave me a monologue about her experience with English classes at Forks High – not good. I got the feeling she was very intimidated by the reading list and offered to help. I liked when I was good at something – it seemed to happen so rarely. Me and Renée had learned early on that it wasn’t going to be sports, so schoolwork seemed like the next best thing. As long as it wasn’t math.In Trigonometry and Spanish, I sat with Angela. She seemed okay with it. If she disliked me, I was sure she wouldn’t show it, so I didn’t talk to her unless she talked first.Edythe Cullen was not at lunch. I was wary, then ecstatic when I saw she wasn’t in Biology, either.After school I went straight to the grocery store. I had made a complete inventory of the kitchen at the house and found it more than lacking. There were a few options in Forks, a chain store and then a few locally owned businesses that looked interesting. I played it safe for this first trip, more familiar with bigger stores and their brands. It was significantly cheaper than it would have been in Phoenix.I got home a little after five, so Charlie beat me. When the Thing’s engine cut off and I didn’t come right inside, he must have gotten curious. He found me loading my arms with bags out of the backseat.“You went to the store?” He asked with alarm. I thought maybe he would react like this. I didn’t want him to think that his preparations for my arrival weren’t good enough. I was sure he did his best.“Oh, I just needed some things,” I said. He walked over and started taking some of the bags from me. “Thought I could start cooking. Do you eat at the diner every night? Red meat kills, Dad.”“Bells, I’m a grown man. How much was all this?”“Pretty cheap, comparatively.”He continued to mutter as we took the groceries inside. He put the fresh vegetables in the crisper, which impressed me, and harrumphed to himself at my oat milk and liquid coffee creamer. When we were done, he tried to hand me a wad of cash.“No, thanks,” I said.“Bells, I told you I wanted you to save your money. You’re not going to pay for your own groceries in my house.”I wondered how long until I got a my house, my rules. It felt kind of cool to hear Charlie say it. I took the money.“I’m making chicken piccata,” I said firmly. “And salad. You’ll like it.”“Don’t you have homework or something?”I grinned at his dubiousness. I knew where it came from – Renée was a terrible cook. But I’d gotten pretty good at it, thanks to Phil and the Cooking Network. “Don’t you have some ESPN to watch, or something?”He took a beer from the fridge and sat at the table, reading from his phone with a far-sighted squint. “How was school?”“It was great,” I told him.“You making any friends?”I listed them. Angela, Jessica, Eric, Mike. None of them were exactly friends but as soon as I mentioned last names Charlie knew exactly who they were. He told me Angela was the daughter of the pastor at the Methodist church, and Mike’s parents owned the sporting goods store between Forks and Olympic National Park.Before I knew it, we had been talking for over an hour. The chicken piccata was a success, and I saw in real time Charlie changing his mind about my cooking for him.  I couldn’t recall the last time we had conversed so successfully. It seemed to me as a younger tween that Charlie was impossibly difficult to speak to. Had it been this easy, all along, and I was just too disinterested to try?I put the leftovers away while Charlie did the dishes. “What do you usually do after dinner?”“Oh, catch the news, whatever’s on.”I leaned against the fridge door after closing it. Now I was feeling hesitant. “Would it be okay if I did homework in the living room? You can watch whatever, I’ll have my headphones in.”Charlie didn’t look at me. He wiped his hands on a towel and nodded. “Of course, Bells,” he said, voice tight. “That’d be just fine.”“Okay,” I said, and escaped before things got weepy. I had the unfortunate feeling that was where things were heading, should I ever work up the nerve to actually apologize to him. I wanted to avoid it at all costs, at least at this juncture.________________________ The next day was when I began to notice Mike. He had been around all week – we had Biology together, though he sat in the back – but on my second and third days he started walking with me to all of my classes, even the ones out of his way. It was fine, he was as chatty as Jessica and could sometimes even make me laugh, but I started to think he might become a problem.Edythe was gone again, so that was two days in a row. This kept me up at night – how on Earth was I not supposed to feel like it was somehow about me? I had seen her once, looking normal in the lunchroom, and then after that all I did was sit next to her. Were the Cullens that strange? Were they some kind of beautiful offshoot of the Mormon church that hated non-white people? Couldn’t be. They were, by all appearances, a rather diverse family. Or – and here I really started to freak out – were they, or Edythe alone, so strictly anti-cop that the sight of the Sheriff’s daughter sent them packing? I knew my theories were terrible, but I couldn’t stop turning the possibilities over like a Rubik’s Cube of social ineptness.I asked around as much as I could without seeming obsessed. What I found was this: the Cullen family was nice. The kids, the parents, everyone. No one had an actual anecdote about anything bad. What little disdain I saw in my classmates seemed to come from the general dislike and envy of gorgeous and intelligent young people. Sharon at the front office desk talked to me at length about “those wonderful children”, Charlie had said his piece already, and a random girl I talked to in Spanish said that Emmett Cullen had a fan club in the junior and senior classes, but everyone was too scared to approach him because of course he wouldn’t be interested. Here again seemed to be the vague insinuation that Emmett Cullen and Rosalie Hale were involved in a way decidedly not brother-and-sisterly.The Cullens usually were pulled out of school whenever Washington decided to have good weather. Dr. and Mrs. Cullen took them on hiking trips around the Park, or to visit family up North. Mike’s dad saw the family all the time in their shop, buying supplies and evidently shooting the shit. They were normal, despite being very clearly not normal. I heard not a whiff of Mormonism amidst all the rumors and gossip. Charlie told me he thought Dr. Cullen may be Catholic.“He may be?” I asked over dinner (salmon and rice).Charlie laughed. “I don’t know! He wears a cross around his neck. Isn’t that what that is? But I don’t think they go to any churches in town, or I’d have heard about it, surely. If he was going anywhere at the same time on Sunday mornings half the town’s wives would be flocking there with baked goods.”“What? Why?”“Oh, you know,” he said, chuckling. I clearly did not know, so he explained. “Handsome young doctor comes to town, housewives get excited. I know all the nurses just love him.”Blatant heteronormativity aside, Charlie had a point. People that wore crosses around their necks weren’t just a normal amount of religious.I thought about bringing this up to Charlie, but didn’t. I was unsure of how it would be received.“He’s young?”“I suppose,” Charlie said, frowning. “For how old the kids are. Not that they’re his, biologically.”Five adopted teenagers. That was a lot. I looked at the remaining four at lunch on Tuesday and Wednesday. They appeared, from my perspective, to be having perfectly normal conversations that siblings together at a lunch table might have. The blonde girl sometimes laughed, the blonde boy looked annoyed. They were the Hales – siblings by birth? Related distantly to the Doctor? Maybe they looked like him. I couldn’t find any pictures online or on the hospital’s Facebook.I didn’t really feel like a creep asking so many questions. People were always ready to talk about the Cullens. They treated my interest as perfectly natural, and I started to believe that it was.By Wednesday night, I had convinced myself that what happened with Edythe Cullen was nothing to do with me, and really hadn’t been that bad at all.On Thursday morning, not a week after I came to Forks, I woke up to snow.______________________________ The days had been progressively colder. Personal dread had kept me from checking the forecast, and when Charlie said there was a chance of frost, I didn’t believe him.I woke before my alarm, clutching the duvet close. My nose was numb with cold. I kept it wrapped around me and toddled to the window, seeing with horror that the lawn was covered in a thick white blanket of death.“Dad?” I said, after throwing on sweatpants. He was downstairs making coffee. “Dad, it’s freezing in here.”“I told you there’d be frost.”“Well, there’s snow, not frost, and my room is about twenty degrees.”Charlie followed me upstairs, standing in my bedroom and looking around.“It’s an old house, Bells,” he said slowly. “The heating system doesn’t go much higher than seventy-two.”I was cold all the way down to my bones. “What is it at right now?”In the hallway, we looked together at the thermostat. It didn’t even have a display, just a moveable lever with notched numbers on the top.“Seventy-one,” Charlie said.“Is it broken?”“Here.” Charlie moved the lever a half-centimeter to the right. A whole one degree. “But this ain’t Arizona, Bells. It gets cold here at night.”“Okay,” I said. “This may be a stupid question, but will they cancel school today?”“It’s only an inch of snow!”I took that as a no, and grumbled my way back into bed to conserve warmth until my alarm went off. Only a complete idiot would come to Forks not expecting weather like this, but in September?“Bella?” Charlie said later, knocking on my door. I let out a bleat of misery. “Check the coat closet before you go, alright? If the car breaks down somewhere – which it won’t – you don’t want to be stuck without enough warmth. Trust me.”“Okay!”“And maybe keep a blanket in the backseat, too. Some food. Just – make sure you take it slow around curves.”Jesus Christ, it was ‘just one inch’ of snow now I had to worry about starving to death in my own truck. “Fine!” I called. Charlie plodded back downstairs and then I heard him actually leave, about a half hour earlier than usual. Had I chased him away again? Shit.I put on my turtleneck again, then a shirt over that, then a sweater. I threw my black slacks in the dryer, which was in a little room beneath the stairs. In it was the coat closet, which I opened and looked through, pants-less and shivering. It smelled like dusty linen and mothballs. On the top shelf were several boxes of storage, below several intense-looking pairs of hiking and utility boots. On hangers in the middle were, wall to wall, coats, jackets and sweaters.The sweaters, I had to admit, were cool. Thick and knit, from the nineties or older. It was all a fairly uniform brown or green or gray. I tugged from the tightly packed mass a heavy layered zip up, several inches thick and rainproof.I put it on, then took my blissfully warm pants from the dryer and put them on, smoothing leftover wrinkles. My hair got a cursory brushing and I applied a preparatory layer of lip balm. As I was about to leave, I got a text message.
Good morning, Bella. It’s Ang! Are you freaking out about the snow?
I laughed at that, typing back, it’s only an inch. I’ll be fine!
Well, I just wanted to offer to give you a ride. I don’t think there’s any ice on the roads but there might be later today.
Ice on the roads. It was September.I’ll be fine, Angela. Driving in the rain had been simple enough to learn. Ice probably wasn’t much different. Thank you, though! See you in a bit.If the inside of the house was cold, the outside was bitter. Truly bitter, so cold that I tasted acid in my mouth. There was nothing actively falling from the sky, which meant it was the first morning I didn’t have to sprint to the car covering my head.Snow was quieter than rain. It was eerie._______________________________ I should have left when I saw people throwing snowballs at each other before school. Angela and Jessica both made fun of me for wearing so many layers. Jessica offered me her scarf, like that would help. I knew she was making fun of me, so I wound it around my neck just to spite her.Lunch went fine. No Edythe Cullen – this was just something I would always be thinking about, now, whether or not she would terrorize me again. Sharon at the front office told me Edythe had a case of strep, and that she had not, as I had hoped, transferred classes. It was afterward, in the courtyard, that my Hell became real.A snowball fight broke out around us. It was carnage – I made for the nearest door. But Mike fucking Newton grabbed me – laughing! – and used me to block a wad of snow hurled by Tyler Crowley. It hit me in the face and I screeched.“Put her down!” Jessica said, laughing quite hard, tugging on Mike’s arm. He did, and then he had the gall to trail alongside me all the way to Biology, talking my goddamn ear off as though he hadn’t just made himself my personal enemy.I shook him off at my desk, drawing up my shirt collars to wipe the moisture from my face. Then I held my hands cupped to my face, exhaling to un-freeze my cheeks and nose. My fury at Mike had created a flop sweat along my back and in my armpits. I shrugged out of my coat and let it flop over the back of my chair, then went back to breathing into my hands.While I was doing this, the chair next to me moved.My body reacted like it was a gunshot. I froze, panicked. Edythe was here. I wasn’t ready for it. I wasn’t one for confrontation.“Hello,” said a voice.Curiosity overpowered dread. I lowered my hands and looked at her.Edythe Cullen was still sitting at the edge of the desk, just far enough away from me for it to be noticeable. But everything else was different. She didn’t have the hostile death-mask today. She was just looking at me, all composed and polite. Her hair looked dampened, a rust-colored bun on top of her head.“I didn’t have a chance to introduce myself Monday. I’m Edythe.”Nonplussed, I said nothing. Her smile faltered.“You must be Bella Swan?”Her eyes looked too big. It’s wrong, I thought, looking at that face.“You know my name?” I asked.She nodded. “I think everyone knows your name.”I said the only thing that came to mind. “Sure, but you’re the only one who hasn’t called me Isabella.”Edythe cocked her head to the side, expression unchanging.Mrs. Banner finally started class. I turned away from Edythe. I didn’t know how to feel, except relieved that I wouldn’t have to do lab work with someone who hated me. Because it no longer seemed like she hated me. The change in tone almost, almost convinced me for good that I had partly imagined that first day.At the bell, Mike was already coming over, ready to escort me to Gym. I gathered my things and got ready to meet him in the middle, but before I could move Edythe Cullen was standing in my path.I jumped. I almost fell over my chair trying to get away from her. She wasn’t threatening, or anything, but something in her posture was just…authoritative. She was much taller than I had realized.Behind her, Mike faltered, eyes wide.“You don’t like the cold,” Edythe said to me. It wasn’t really a question, but I answered automatically.“No, I don’t. Why – what makes you say that?”“Snowball,” she said dismissively, stepping to the side. I hurried past her, but she moved with me. I gave Mike a helpless shrug. “Why did you come here, then?”I noticed, in the hall, that she moved as gracefully as the other one, Alice.“My dad lives here.” I knew she knew that.“Of course,” she said. “Chief Swan. I was out sick, you know. I had strep throat.”She was talking really fast. I almost didn’t know what she said. “Uh, okay?”Edythe stepped in front of me just before we reached the doors. It was sudden, absolute. I reared back and stopped, too.Her eyes got bigger and more insistent. “I wasn’t feeling very well on Monday. So, if I seemed…out of it...”Her voice was…also off. Low and husky, but off. She pronounced all her t’s in “out of it” and “wasn’t”. The huskiness I would allow as a symptom of strep. But ‘out of it’ was not how I would have described what happened on Monday. Actually, it seemed like Edythe Cullen had been very focused on hating me.The full force of her face was bearing down on me again, though now it was a mask of apology instead of murder. All I could do was nod.Edythe smiled tightly, satisfied, and left in a series of very long strides. I followed in a dazed stupor, standing and letting snowflakes fall into my hair.In gym, when Mike asked me what Edythe had wanted, I told him I had absolutely no idea._____________________ The house continued to get colder. I slept in socks, which was new. Charlie kept giving me the kind of looks you would give a spooked horse and I noticed the thermostat had been inched up to seventy-three. I felt like a complete brat for making such a fuss in the first place. He was probably scared I was packing my shit for Florida. I made up for it by pretending I didn’t have any homework so we could watch Terminator together after dinner.“Roads could ice tomorrow,” Charlie said.I tore my gaze from Sarah Conner. “No.”“Mean cold front moving in. I don’t know if you should be driving in it.”“I’ll be fine,” I said immediately. “It…it can’t be that bad.”“It can get pretty bad.” He glanced at me. “See a lot of teenagers get hurt, even adults that have lived here their whole lives.”Oh, he was not getting me in the cruiser. “I know how to drive, Dad,” I said. My voice was sharper than intended.Charlie dropped his eyes, moustache bristling. I wondered if he would tell me off. But he just said, “Well, alright.” And he dropped it.“Sorry. I shouldn’t have taken a tone.”“Just be careful,” Charlie said gruffly. “That’s all I’m ever gonna ask of you, ‘kay Bells?”“Okay,” I said. We finished the movie in silence._________________________ 
Edythe
Vampires and their special abilities are born simultaneously. When I was first created, I had no way of knowing why or what I was. The sensations alone – sight, smell, taste – assaulted the brain. Were Carlisle not there I would have run until I found people, and I would have destroyed them all to quench the burning brand stuck in my throat. He could barely contain me as I was – I was new and stronger than him. And I was especially crazed, because beyond all of the initial chaos were the voices.It was a short comedy of errors between the two of us – me screaming and him talking – before he realized that I was hearing his voice and his thoughts.I was a mind reader. This was unique among our kind. Vampire abilities were always unique, even when they were similar to another, but I had only ever known one with a similar gift to mine, and he had only ever known me. I didn’t always enjoy hearing other people’s thoughts, but it had its uses. First and foremost – reconnaissance.Vampires prevailingly lived and traveled in pairs, or small untethered groups. The hunt for blood and relentless destruction of human life made a calm and steady existence near impossible. To live as my family did, as a family unit, surviving off the blood of wildlife, helped. Our diet made us less volatile, and we could stay in one place longer when the population wasn’t continually ticking down because of us. But it was touch and go. We were strong, our skin reflected the light too sharply, we moved too quickly when we forgot ourselves – these little irregularities added up over time. Humans noticed us, and sometimes they became suspicious.It usually started with age. When too many of our human neighbors thought about Carlisle’s crow’s feet or wondered why Alice looked not a day older after several years of school, I knew it was time to go.It was my job, the function I served for my family’s safety. I listened to the minds of the humans, and I made sure, when possible, that they noticed us only the right amount.The girl had noticed us.I heard it first on Thursday morning, visiting the front desk to deliver a doctor’s note. Sharon Coogler saw me and was, in the ephemeral, skip-trace way of human memory, reminded of when the Swan girl had asked her about me earlier in the week. I didn’t see what it was – it was too brief – but it was enough to put me on my guard.I walked the long way to classes, letting my cohort look at me as I looked at their minds for flashes of dark skin and gray eyes. Angela Weber. Mike Newton. Elizabeth Meyer. Kacie Smith.I even saw the girl, at a distance, with Jessica Stanley. Jessica’s mind was loud, pitched up as though begging me to listen.“And then my dog ran inside, and I was, like, oh my god there’s a dead rabbit in your mouth!” I heard her human voice prattling on. At the same time, she thought: This story is boring. I should really stop telling it. Dad tells it so much better. I don’t even think Bella is listening to me. With thoughts often came images, depending on the thinker. The Swan girl’s face flashed in Jessica Stanley’s mind, but from where I stood, I only saw the back of her head. All around her were teenaged brains but where she was, where there should have been a ball of anxiety and self-consciousness and pop culture – where there should have been answers – I heard nothing.If it were not for the heartbeat and the smell, it would be like no person stood there at all. If I closed my eyes she disappeared.________________________________ I did not think my attempt at convincing the girl I had been sick would work. It was difficult to be convincing and genuine when you were expelling the amount of breath absolutely necessary to speak, because having to inhale was too stressful. I would have gotten away with it if Banner had not called on me to name the Krebs Cycle. I had to breathe suddenly, without ample time to prepare.The smell of the girl’s blood affected me not one iota less than it had on Monday. I just had a modicum of preparation, so instead of plotting the immediate murder of every human in the room and the slow, exquisite murder of Bella Swan, I only daydreamed about it.I came home, as normal, instead of running to Tanya again. I was strong enough.My siblings were predictably horrible about all of it. They watched my distraction with eagle eyes, wondered to themselves what should be done about a human I could not read. I laid on the ground about it. I had been watching the stars turn for hours when someone finally came to check on me.“You’re upset about something,” Jasper said, dry as a bone. I sighed. He sat near me, leaning against a tree trunk. What bothers you more?Jasper, my brother, was gifted with the ability to feel emotions. My own gift doubled the effect in my head. I rolled my head toward him. A tick crawled over my bare foot, tapped its mandible against my skin, and decided against it.“I don’t know,” I told him, buzzing my lips together to deaden the sound. A human could not hear me if they had their ear to my mouth, but if anyone in the house had a window open, they’d be able to make it out. “No, I know. I’d rather hear her. At least I understand why I want to kill her.”You know I’ve enjoyed it, he thought. I raised my eyebrows – he was beyond relieved that I was brought so low by human blood. He was tired of being the weakest one among us. My apologies. I know I could not have resisted. I still might not.Jasper had made a concerted effort to come nowhere near Bella Swan. I did not know if his gift was as useless on her as mine. It would be cruel to ask him to test it.“I’m bored,” Alice announced loudly, approaching from the house. “Let’s watch a movie.”Human minds gave so much away. They were organic and messy. The vampire brain was so much more linear, so much sharper. There was more control to be had. When Alice didn’t want me to see what she was thinking, she counted. Today it was French, and she was at quatre mille sept cent deux. “What is it?” I asked again. She ignored me. Usually when Alice hid her thoughts from me it meant she was going to do something I hated. Or it meant she was trying to surprise me. The two were not mutually exclusive.“Jazz,” she requested, holding out a hand and wagging her fingers. Jasper went to her. “And have you discovered why Eddie is on the ground?” Quatre mille sept cent trois. There’s going to be snow again next week, maybe ice.“Ennui,” he responded, his accent tilting the vowels all wrong.At my continued silence she gave up on me and dragged Jasper back into the house. I listened to their movie from the grass, watching through Alice’s mind as she faithfully committed the whole cinematic experience to thought. Her focus really was incredible.Emmett and Rosalie stood on the back porch, staring into each other’s eyes.“I think we’ll leave soon,” Rose murmured, so low I only heard because her thoughts were unimpeded by sound waves and ambient noise. “Back to Alaska.”“Babe,” Emmett chided. He knew she was only saying it to upset me. “It’s not that serious.”“Edythe isn’t special. She doesn’t get to pretend her mistakes aren’t mistakes. But it’s fine, we’ve all been there. If she could only admit – “Emmett did something – smothered her mouth, kissed her, unleashed some latent skill as a snake charmer. He also swept her up – it was one set of feet that took off into the trees at the North of our property.Rosalie only convinced me further of our – my – need to stay. I would master myself. I would master the girl. She would submit to my worldview.___________________________ 
Bella
Edythe was there again on Friday, at lunch and then in class. I had passed her beneath one of the walkways between classes and she had not even looked at me, so. Two could play at that game.Unfortunately, Mrs. Banner chose that day to give us worksheets to finish with our table partners. Hell. I took the sheet she handed us, slapping it down on the blacktop in the massive gulf between our bodies that Edythe created by pushing her chair so far over. Biology Laboratory Safety Worksheet.“These are my favorites,” Edythe said suddenly. I didn’t look at her, just picked up my pin and answered the first question – Which of these is not correct about heating substances in a test tube? I circled C.“Are you sure that’s right?” Edythe asked. She was looking at me with slightly raised eyebrows, like questioning me was a huge teaching moment.“Yeah,” I said.“Laboratory safety guidelines change almost every year. They’re always learning new things.”“I took advanced placement Chem last year,” I informed her. “I don’t think any of it has changed since then.”She nodded. “Fair enough.”There had been no attempt at moving closer to me to read the other questions. I went through the sheet and answered all of them. I slid it to her.Her hair was down again. She leaned forward to read over the sheet, and a big curtain of red fell in front of her face. It wafted toward me a smell so extremely pleasant that I leaned into it.Edythe suddenly sat back again, glancing at me warily. I returned to my former posture, now mirroring her in trying to lean away. “Looks fine,” she said.We were the first ones to finish. Mrs. Banner was standing in the back at Mike’s table answering a question. Edythe Cullen was looking at me and for some reason I was almost dizzy.“Do you have any plans this weekend?” She asked me.I had been added to a group text message that morning, actually, that consisted of myself, Angela, and Jessica. Jessica had informed us both that she and Mike were surveying interest in a beach trip early on Saturday. I only agreed because Charlie told me he would be working.“No,” I said to Edythe. It felt like telling her would beg an extended invite, and I didn’t want to.“Well, how are you liking Forks?” She asked next.These questions were posed casually, but they were not asked in a casual way. Edythe had fixed her eyes on me and there was a hunch to her shoulders that made me feel like I was being accused of something.“It’s great,” I said. “How about you?”Her nostrils flared. “What?”“Well, aren’t you from…Canada?”She leaned back in her chair, casting those long legs out under our shared desk. “Alaska.”So she didn’t enjoy direct questions, either. I asked another: “Do you wear contacts?”“No,” she said, but there was a long pause before she said it. She turned her face toward the window so I couldn’t see her eyes and I felt my pulse tick up in irritation.“Huh,” I said.Her shoulders pulled back, slowly, until she finally whipped her head back toward me and said, “What?”Once again, I failed to see how I had provoked such a reaction. I gave it right back to her. “It was just a question.”Her eyebrows pulled together in what I could only read as anger. “Why did you ask it?”“Why did I ask? I don’t know! To be nice?”“How is it nice?” Edythe questioned.“You’re right,” I said, shutting down. “It wasn’t nice.”“I just want to understand,” Edythe breathed. She turned away from me again and crossed her arms. I didn’t understand, but I wasn’t going to try. There was something severely wrong with Edythe Cullen._____________________ Snow had started to fall lightly during lunch and it didn’t let up. Walking to Gym I saw that the various puddles of melted snow gathered at the posts of the walkways had frozen over. Mike took the snowball to the face I gave him with good humor, and his entire face was pink with cold.“So what is it with you and Edythe Cullen?” He asked.“Huh?”“I don’t know, I looked over and it was like you were arguing with each other. You looked pissed.” He said this with heavy amusement, evidently at the thought of me being angry at anyone.“I think she has a problem with me,” I told him. “But I don’t know what I did.”“Shit,” he said. “Well…is it, like…do you want me to say something to her?”This shocked me so much that I almost laughed in his face. “What, Mike? No!”“If she’s being mean to you – ““I can take care of myself,” I said over him. “Okay?”He turned pinker, rubbing the back of his neck. We were in the gymnasium now, the air hot and humid. Tennis shoes squeaked from people already out of the locker rooms and running around with basketballs.“Sorry,” Mike said.“Don’t be.” I hefted my backpack higher on my shoulder and went to change.School ended a half hour early due to ‘ice’. “Does this happen a lot?” I asked Mike. He had waited for me outside the girls’ locker room. “What does it mean?”He shrugged. “I think there’s gonna be storms tonight or something.”Everyone was rushing to their cars to get out and enjoy an extra half-hour of Friday night. I watched the ground as I walked and only saw one dark patch of ice by the curb. When I reached Thing, I was reminded of the chains that had appeared on my tires overnight. I saw them on other tires, too, and could infer their purpose pretty easily. It was still, I felt, too much.I was standing in the empty spot next to my car – my neighbor had already booked it – and texting Charlie the thank-you I’d meant to send that morning when an ungodly noise ripped through the parking lot.It wasn’t loud, but, high pitched and keening like an animal, it was immediately concerning. I turned toward the screech, curious and wondering if this was what car trouble sounded like. Transmission problems or some such thing.Not exactly - there was a van skidding sideways on the ice. It looked almost funny, just moving like normal but at a diagonal angle, tires spinning uselessly in place. It wasn’t going very fast, really, except that it was moving, and it was a very heavy car, and if the driver had lost control, then there would be no way from stopping it from smashing and probably obliterating the first thing it hit.Incidentally, that was my car. Thing would probably be okay. However, I was between the two, and was less confident in my own chances.I tried to run out of the path of certain doom. This plan stopped cold when my sneakered foot slid on a patch of ice I hadn’t even been aware of. Gravity dumped me bodily onto the asphalt. I might have tried to get up, but the van was almost on top of me, sliding until blue metal was my entire field of vision.So came my life to a swift, clumsy end. I shut my eyes.Impact came in the next instant, but from entirely the wrong direction. Something hit me, and I felt myself pressed deeper, harder against the ground and pinched. I thought I may have rolled once. My head smacked into something and bounced. An earsplitting shriek of metal erupted around me along with blooming pain. My brain was vibrating from impact.I opened my eyes, confused. I had definitely been hit. But the pain I felt didn’t seem appropriate for that. From where my head was nestled against the underside of Thing’s front tire, I observed that the blue van had wrapped itself around the front of my truck, nearly at a ninety-degree angle. There was only about a foot between me and the crumpled blue metal.In that space with me was Edythe Cullen.She crouched just in front of me. Her hand was on the van – at the center of the largest dent. Her eyes – too big – looked down at me with nothing less than complete bewilderment. Only a second – less – had passed since the initial impact. I had not moved, I had not quite reconciled the many things that had occurred, and before I could open my mouth Edythe Cullen – was – gone.She was simply there…and then not. There was just the remnant of what I had smelled in class – something sweet and aromatic like shampoo. I felt my brain sort of break right then, and I screamed. Just one good, long scream. Then I stopped. Things had started happening again. People were surrounding the cars, reaching for me, calling 911. I didn’t see her anywhere.Ben Cheney leaned over the van, asking me if I was okay. I must have nodded, because he seemed relieved and told me not to move at all. Fine. I didn’t trust myself to try to get to my feet. It took six EMTs and two teachers to shift the van far enough to pull me out. At some point, someone pulled my jacket off. It glistened with tiny pieces of broken glass.I told them that it was my dad’s jacket, and that I needed it, but no one listened. I was slapped into a neck brace, which unfortunately meant I had survived the wreck only to die of embarrassment.Lights were flashed in my eyes and burly EMTs asked me if I was feeling any pain. I was vaguely aware of things being done regarding the driver of the car, who I saw was Tyler Crowley. He was bleeding, and it didn’t seem like I was, so I didn’t get why I was the one being fussed over.To make matters worse, Chief Swan arrived – flashing lights and all.“Dad! Dad, I’m completely fine,” I rushed out when he came at me. There was more emotion on his face than I had maybe ever seen all at once. His stricken expression when he looked at the van, and then me, caused me to understand – I almost died. “They took your jacket though…”“Where are you hurt?” He asked, ignoring the EMTs as they formed a human barrier between us and the school body. The one who had been pulling shards of glass from my hair stood by. Charlie touched my scalp with both hands, searching for blood, I guessed.I managed to convince him I wasn’t in any immediate danger, and his face got a little less red. He gave me a swift kiss on the forehead – the feathery moustache tickled me. I felt like a child. Then he talked to the EMT and apparently instructed them to lift me into the ambulance.“I don’t think it’s necessary!” I tried to argue. “I’m not actually injured!”“Sit tight!” Charlie called, pointing toward the cruiser. “I’ll meet you at the hospital!”“The what?!”I finally, unwillingly, looked past him. It was pandemonium. Two ambulances, three police cars, and the entire student body just staring at me or rushing from the building to come stare at me. The ones who had already been there were pressed as close as the deputies would allow, with cell phones and lots of yelling about what it had looked like (my guess, bad).Hanging back by the gymnasium, at the edge of the lot, were the Cullens. They looked on with polite curiosity, seeming to murmur amongst themselves about the incident without involving themselves like the rest. Edythe looked bored.This is it, I thought. I’m having a psychotic episode. This is what Forks does to people._____________________ I’d been in hospitals only a few times before. Once when my Aunt Kay had donated a kidney, we flew to Los Angeles to stay with her during her recovery. I had broken my leg in the seventh grade back when sports were something I tolerated. I also went to the hospital for wisdom tooth surgery. I did not enjoy any of it – not the septic smells, the sickness, and certainly not the needles. I remembered hating the x-ray machine. This time was no different.What seemed like hours later, I was taken (wheeled, not allowed to walk) to a long room with a row of beds on one side, each separated by a hanging plastic sheet. A nurse left me with a pressure cuff and a thermometer beneath my tongue. I ripped the neck brace off and tossed it onto the floor.Right after me came another wheelchair.“Oh, my God,” I said. Tyler had a bandage around his head and a brace on his arm to match the one on his neck. “Are you okay?”“Bella!” He tried to turn his head as he was wheeled past to a bed several away from me. “Bella, I thought I was going to kill you!“You missed,” I reassured him. “I’m quick like that. Um – excuse me, my dad –?”The nurse nodded briskly, already walking away from me. “You’ll still need to see a doctor before you go, sweetheart. I’ll find the Sheriff and let him know you’re out of x-ray.”I was trapped, forced to listen to Tyler apologize over and over. The poor guy was tormenting himself and I didn’t even have a scratch. My car probably didn’t have a scratch. The only thing going on was a growing cluster headache behind my eyes. I would have sat up to pull the curtain between me and Tyler, but that was just a smidge too rude. Closing my eyes was the next best thing.“Are you sleeping?” Asked a voice. I heard rustling plastic.I opened my eyes, disbelieving. Edythe motherfucking Cullen was there, in all of her otherworldly ease, not a hair out of place. She had pulled my curtain out and around on the U-loop ring, nearly closing us in together.“What are you doing here?” I tried to sound intimidating.“It’s all about who you know.” The slightest of vindictive smiles at the corner of her mouth.“Bells.” Charlie rounded the corner, rushing to my side. He still looked very high-strung but much calmer than before. “Anything broken?”I would have said, emphatically, no. But a man had followed Charlie, a man I knew immediately to be Dr. Cullen.“Let’s have a look and see,” he said briskly, pulling a clipboard from under his arm. “How are you feeling, Miss Swan?”Charlie had been right about the housewives. This man was good-looking. Sort of blonde, sort of gray, strong jaw and hooked nose. Just the right number of lines around his mouth and eyes. Thin and yet muscular, not that you could tell much under the white coat. I would bet the women of Forks were clamoring for a piece of it. I personally was unaffected by his appearance, but I saw the appeal. Regardless, it wasn’t really how I knew who he was.I knew because, like Edythe, Dr. Cullen had dark circles beneath his eyes and he was lit from within. The ochre of his skin was at odds with the fluorescent lights.“I feel fine,” I said, gazing at him probably too closely. He smiled a little – this came much easier to his face than to Edythe’s, I noticed, glancing at her – and flipped a light on above my head where the nurse had stuck my x-ray results. Charlie stepped back to squint at it like he had any clue what he was looking for.“Looks good…” Dr. Cullen said encouragingly. “You told the nurse you hit your head. Does it hurt at all?”“No.” He had the faintest hint of an accent. I flinched when he reached for me, and he ignored this to probe at my skull not unlike how Charlie had before. His hands were cold. “Can I go now?”“Bells,” Charlie said sternly.“I think you should be good,” Dr. Cullen said, consulting his chart with a pen and checking some boxes. “I believe Chief Swan wanted to speak with…er…”“Tyler Crowley,” Edythe supplied.Charlie’s back straightened. “Oh, I sure do.”It was my turn to be stern. “Dad.”“Here.” He handed me my phone, which I had been forced to give up at the x-ray session. “Call your mother.”“She doesn’t need to know about this,” I said quickly.“Well, she already does,” he said, giving Edythe a nod as he swept off to rip Tyler Crowley a new asshole. I got out of the bed. My socked foot slid on the linoleum and I stumbled. The Doctor caught me, looking concerned.“Take some Tylenol for the pain,” he suggested.“There is no pain. I’m really okay.”“It sounds like you were extremely lucky.” His pen clicked shut with finality, case closed.I was frazzled and perturbed and I felt awful for Tyler. Renée was going to freak out on me. My next words came up out of nowhere.“Lucky Edythe happened to be standing next to me.”Dr. Cullen looked up from his clipboard at me. His expression of polite banality hardened just enough for me to notice. But then it melted into fatherly concern, and he turned his eyes to Edythe.“I was unaware you were involved,” he said to his daughter.Edythe glared at me. Charlie’s voice echoed through the big room, I heard license and suspended. “I wasn’t, really.”“You pushed me out of the way,” I said.Dr. Cullen looked between us and nodded slowly. “Well, stay put, Edythe. I’ll see to you after I talk to Mr. Crowley.”He smiled at me. His eyes were a warm, honey brown, shades darker than Edythe’s. “Come back if you have any dizziness or nausea,” he said. “It was lovely to finally meet you, I only wish the circumstances were better.” Then he rounded the curtain again and disappeared.Edythe stayed right where she was. I shoved my feet into my shoes and gathered my bravado before facing her.“Well?”Her shoulders shifted back into a fighting-ready stance. “What?”I stepped to the end of the bed, and Edythe moved away from me. Not with her feet, just by leaning back and turning her face slightly toward the curtain. Like I smelled bad or something. Out of spite I took another step in. She recoiled in a way that was not physical.“That van should have crushed me,” I said. “You were there, and you stopped it. And it didn’t hurt you at all.”Some tension broke and she stepped back from me, arms crossed. Her eyes were lighter than Dr. Cullen’s. They were gold, and on the first day of school I was absolutely sure they had been black as night. This dissonance is what made them look so much bigger than before.Her voice dripped with disdain. “You really think I stopped the van?”I nodded. “No one will believe you,” she said next.“I’m not going to tell anybody.”“It’s not good to entertain false realities, even privately.”“You’re – you’re not…” I didn’t have words for what I was thinking. “You’re not going to tell me anything, are you?”Her face twitched. She had known me for two days – we had barely spoken to one another – and I was so supremely irritating to her that it manifested physically. I couldn’t do it. I turned my back on her and pulled my dad away from a miserable Tyler Crowley. For the first time in my life I got into the cruiser with relief.Charlie was very quiet the whole way home while I talked Renée down from the ledge. No, Mom, I did not get hit by a car. Yes, Mom, everyone is fine. No, Mom, you don’t need to fly up here to see me, you’re moving to Florida tomorrow, remember?At the house, I went straight to the upstairs bathroom, citing the need for a shower. Charlie didn’t argue with me.I locked the door and went to the mirror, pulling up my several layers of clothing to examine the bruises I had felt forming since the crash.On either side of my navel, just above my hips, whatever had pinched me down on to the gravel had left twin bruises, each with five deep purple marks and a central oval. Ghost impressions of hands.___________________________________ 
Edythe
I had failed. I was at a loss. I had little experience with humans that were so obstinately aware of me, and I had never given one so much to work with. If she had just kept her eyes closed a second longer – I had thrown her with enough force at the tire to knock her out cold, but of course it didn’t work. I had not miscalculated, either – it was her. Incredibly dangerous things just fell into her orbit. The van, me, God knew what else. With any luck she would be dead from some other tragedy by morning and I would be spared future interaction.“My God, she’s being philosophical,” Rosalie complained from the doorway of the kitchen. You are such a fool, Edythe Mason, moping for days after this human only to prolong your own suffering. You won’t eat her, so – “you may as well have let her blood go to waste on the ground.”She had been going on like this since I returned from the hospital. It was less considerate than the rest of the family, but they were all thinking something to the tune of “what the fuck, Edythe”. No one but Rosalie had said anything yet, we were all just sitting around in silence.“I had to,” I said. Five minds zeroed in on me from their respective pondering. Rosalie, Emmett, Jasper, Alice. I was really only addressing Esme. “If even a drop of her blood had…I would have lost control.”Esme had yet to think a critical thought about what I had done. She was proud of me, which she should not have been. It wasn’t like I had saved Bella Swan for any selfless reason. Carlisle, who was still at the hospital and probably would be until nightfall, had also made the incorrect assumption about my motives.Rosalie sat in the chair opposite me at the table. “We would have stopped you. Of course we would have.” It was going so well. I’m not doing high school again just because you blew it over a human you contracted feelings for – “I thought you were over it,” Emmett said, genuinely confused. “You came back from Denali and you said you were fine.”He was upset about potentially leaving, too. They were all thinking that I had messed up too thoroughly.“I never said I was over it.” What a ridiculous thought. My throat was still hurting. The pain was actually getting worse with each hour. I had touched her, now, and that made it even worse. “I have…a lid on it.”’Good for you, Jasper thought blandly. I turned to Alice next.
Cinq cent mille quinze, cinq cent mille seize, cinq cent mille –
“Alice!” I barked at her.“What?” Emmett asked. “What did she say?”Alice stood from her counter perch and faced me. She looked very serious. Fine, she thought, and the veil of numbers parted. She showed me one of her visions, from earlier in the day. Before I had made up my mind to stop the car.A potential future where I did nothing. Where Bella Swan was crushed like a soda can and turned into a bloody twist of limbs.“Yes?” I said with waning patience. I was glad, seeing this, that I had stopped it. But Alice played the vision for me again, thinking it without adding any editorialism aside from a vague emphasis on me. In this vision I stood next to Alice frozen in shock. Bella’s blood was outside of her, and I didn’t do anything.This was discomfiting to know, but not surprising. Deep, deep down, and I would not admit this, the girl’s blood had not been on my mind when I stopped the God forsaken van. I didn’t know why I had done it, and that terrified me.Alice returned to her counting without a word.“Um, what?” Emmett prodded.“Nothing,” I said quickly, before Alice could tell them and embarrass me even further.Esme put a hand over mine, her thoughts as kind and understanding as ever.Maybe you should make a friend, she thought, my lonely Edythe…Inoffensive, yet this only grated at my nerves. Bella Swan was not my friend.“You said she had been asking about us already,” Rosalie continued. “What happens now?”“Nothing.”“What does that mean?”“She’s not going to say anything.”This incensed Rosalie. “You can’t even read her mind!” She shrieked. “Has everyone lost their mind? Esme?”Esme thought about it. If I was Carlisle’s favorite (I wasn’t, this was just used by the others to gain leverage in arguments), then Rosalie was Esme’s. “She has a point, Edythe. How can you know for sure?”“I’ll make sure,” Rosalie said, watching me with vindictive pleasure. “Simple. Humans die in their sleep all the time.”A sharp growl escaped me. Esme exclaimed: “Rosalie.” There was only the slightest hint of remorse in Rosalie’s mind, and she dropped her eyes, though the plan continued to form.“No,” I snarled as she pictured snapping Bella’s neck. “This is ridiculous. What’s the worst she could do, tell her father that I stopped the van with my bare hands?”They couldn’t argue the point, but it didn’t matter. Maybe the Swan girl couldn’t tell her father or friends what she had seen, but she could do other things. Suspicion spread like wildfire and we were already ill-disguised in this town.Emmett and Jasper had no opinion on the human’s life, they just didn’t want me and Rosalie to fight. Alice’s silence hurt me the most. I needed someone to have my back.“Carlisle would agree with me,” I said desperately.“He would. Let’s wait and see.” Esme, always the diplomat. “Maybe she won’t say anything. No one's going to hurt her.”She cast Rosalie a dark look, and just like that, the conversation was over.Emmett was dragged outside by a petulant Rosalie. Alice fled through the garage. Jasper hung around by the fridge, watching me.Esme put a hand on my hair. “How are you feeling?” I hope you know you can talk to me about anything.“I know,” I said, answering the wrong question. She waited. I leaned into her touch.“It’s hard to explain, Esme. I don’t want everyone to fight about it.”“We may all have…differing ideas about how to fix this,” she began. She rationalized Rosalie’s pigheadedness as misguided loyalty. I wasn’t so sure. “But everyone has the same worry. Worry for you, worry for our family.”She was right, and it was useless for all of us to try and come to a decision without Carlisle there to moderate, anyway. Even Rosalie would listen to him. I would just have to wait, and listen, and see what the Swan girl did at school.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Bella
I slept off my ordeal right after getting home, and by the time I woke up it was late. I had watched movies on my laptop until the early hours, and then fell asleep until I heard a knock on my bedroom door.“Hngh?” I called.“Bells?” Said Charlie. The door stayed shut. Renée would have kicked the damn thing open already if she needed something from me. I had to say come in before Charlie stuck his head inside. It was early, he was in uniform about to go to work.“Are you feeling okay?”“Yes.”“I – I was just thinking, the guys don’t really need me today, so if you – ““What?” I sat up. “Dad, I don’t know how many times I have to say this, I did not get hit by a car yesterday. I don’t need you.”I was less than two minutes out of REM sleep, and I forgot who I was talking to. Charlie wasn’t Renée. We didn’t have such an easy back and forth that I could be so dismissive. Renée would have rolled her eyes and called me “Mrs. Big Britches” or something. Charlie just looked taken aback.“I mean – I don’t need you to take off work. I’m going to the beach, anyway.”“Right. Tyler Crowley isn’t going, is he?” Charlie asked, like Tyler was a total villain and not a dumb high schooler who made a mistake.“He is not,” I said.“Hm. Well, I’ll see you tonight, then,” Charlie sighed. “Sorry to wake you.”“It’s okay,” I said, but he had already closed the door.________________________ The sun had come out when I next woke up, half past ten. The snow had almost all melted, and the spots of brown grass were reassuring to me. It wouldn’t be warm, but I missed the sun on my face. To prepare I pulled on thick socks, leggings, and a sweatshirt, which was pretty depressing as far as beachwear went. Charlie’s heavy jacket, now picked free of glass, was my new favorite.Finding Mike’s family’s store wasn’t too hard. Newton’s Olympic Outfitters was only a short trip on the freeway, taking me away from the coastline, actually. The parking lot was big and mostly empty. Everyone milled around near a large, be-stickered van. They called out to me when I got down from the truck.It was everyone from our lunch table, plus Eric, and then two more. Lauren and Kacie, I remembered. I sidled immediately over to Angela. I tended to stay as close to her as possible in group settings like this. Jessica was fine in small doses but tended to hog the attention. Fine by me. When they had gotten all their questions out of the way about my health, we packed into the car together. It was Eric who got behind the steering wheel.Despite my best efforts, I somehow ended up between Angela and Mike in the second row. He shifted to put his arm around me, and I got a strong wave of cologne. He didn’t smell bad, and his arm around me wasn’t that intrusive. It felt more like companionship, at least on my end. I could unfortunately feel Jessica staring daggers at us from the back seat.It was only twenty miles to La Push from Mike’s store, and fifteen from Charlie’s – my – house. Angela rolled the window down, and I tried to get as much sunlight as possible, staunchly ignoring talk of some upcoming school dance.The mile-long crescent of First Beach was breathtaking. The water was a dark gray, even in the sunlight, and white-capped waves heaved against the rocky shore. Islands rose out of the harbor with steep cliff sides, reaching to uneven summits and crowned with austere, soaring firs. The beach had sand occasionally, but mainly consisted of large, smooth stones that reflected a spectrum of color in the sun. It was surreal.A cool, briny wind pulled at my hair as we picked our way down from the gravel lot. Mike led us to a ring of driftwood logs that had obviously been used for parties like ours before. He, Eric, and Ben worked together to gather wood for a fire.      “Ever seen a driftwood fire?” Angela asked, sitting next to me on a log. I shook my head.“I think you’ll like it.” She leaned into me as a strong wind blew through our stretch of beach. I watched Mike kneel by the driftwood pile, lighting one of the smaller sticks. Flames began to lick quickly up the dry wood.“It’s blue!”“The salt does it.” Angela watched Ben, who was setting up a Bluetooth speaker. She hadn’t said anything, but Jessica had pinned the two of them as ‘seriously crushing on each other’.Then, though it was not yet noon, the boys started passing around beers. I took one. I made sure to keep an eye out in case Charlie showed up. He couldn’t patrol here but Billy Black was his best friend, and I thought he must live nearby.Someone mentioned tidal pools a bit later, and a group of us split off to take the short hike. I hated the thought of walking through the tricky terrain, but Mike and Jessica were part of the group that was staying, and I really hoped that his preoccupation with me would just transfer to her if he didn’t look at me for long enough. I felt bad thinking of him like that, but then I thought of him offering to “talk” to Edythe Cullen for me.The green light of the forest was strangely at odds with the laughter of my friends. I took my steps carefully, adding to the conversation only when I felt like I wouldn’t immediately fall over. Angela and I caught each other’s hands a few times to avoid incident, laughing it off after. Eventually, we broke through and found the shore again.“Wow,” said Ben. “Never been over here.”“It’s cool, right?” Eric jumped down from an upturned root and jogged toward the rock. At intervals white mist shot up from the short drop to the waves. These spurts trickled down into the pools of water.I was very careful not to lean too far over the little ocean ponds. The others were fearless, leaping over rocks, perching precariously on the edges. I crouched over one of the largest pools and stayed there, spellbound. The bouquets of brilliant anemones undulated in a current, hermit crabs scuttled around in their twisted shells. Fat purple and green starfish clung to the rocks. A small eel with white racing stripes wove through some green weeds, waiting for the sea to return at high tide.Then Eric found some washed-up seaweed, and he and Ben ganged up on the rest of us. Angela, Lauren and I dodged their throws, screaming and laughing. I so massively preferred seaweed to snow that I didn’t care when some landed in my hair and got stuck.Finally, Angela got tired and Ben and Eric were hungry. When we got back to the beach, there new people around our fire. I was also surprised to see skin that was as dark as my own, maybe darker. Teenagers, boys from the reservation most likely.Jessica had been busy. She introduced us to the boys as we sat. One of them looked up in interest when she said my name.While we ate – roasted hot dogs and bags of chips – I was thinking about Charlie. How had I managed to be such a massive bitch to him in so little time? It was only the first week, but still. I hadn’t meant to come and make things worse.Mike and Lauren messed around with the speaker while everyone else broke off to either hike back to the tidal pools or sit closer to the water. Jessica tried to make conversation with a tall guy from the reservation, and the one that had looked at me funny broke away from them to approach me.“Bella?” He said.He looked odd – young and old at the same time. There was a childish roundness to his face, but his arms and chest were defined and he was very tall. Long black hair hung loose over his shoulders.“You bought my dad’s truck?” He continued. I realized who he was, with a gasp.“Jacob?”He nodded. “Charlie said you were coming back. He’s pretty excited.”“I didn’t recognize you!” I said, because now that I was looking at him, I could remember quite clearly the smaller, ganglier version.“Puberty,” he huffed, sitting on the ground next to me. “How’s the car?”“It’s amazing. I love it.”“A little slow, though,” he said. “I’m glad Charlie bought it. My dad wouldn’t let me work on building a car while I had a perfectly good one sitting right there.”“You build cars?”“When I have time.” His voice was pleasant and husky, his smile toothy and wide. “You look different, too. Older.” I blushed. “Forks driving you crazy yet?”“Um.” The way he said it made me wonder what Charlie had said to him – to Billy – about me. Surely they would have asked why I didn’t come visit him anymore. “Not yet. I’m actually really enjoying it.”This was the truth. Aside from my own stupid blunders with Charlie, and aside from the one kind of insane thing I was refusing to think about today, Forks was nice.“That’s awesome,” Jacob said. “How old are you? Senior, right?”“That’s right. I’m eighteen.”“Shit,” he said. “I’m seventeen and a half, but I’m only a junior.”“Where do you go to school?”“There’s one here on the reservation,” he said. I inched forward as another strong wind blew past us. “Guess you’re making friends. That’s cool. Could have guessed you would.”He winked at me, which I found hilarious. “Everyone’s pretty nice," I said. "There’s this one girl, though.”I pressed my lips together. Why couldn’t I just shut up?But Jacob made a big show of turning to listen, propping his head on his hand. “Oh, do tell.”“It’s nothing. I just…” This made me feel extremely silly, but what did Jacob Black know? He didn’t go to Forks High. “She hated me from day one. My lab partner. Edythe Cullen.”Jacob blinked, then frowned, turning away and making a sound like a laugh.“What?”“Nothing.” He laughed again. “It’s just…Cullen. It’s a whole…thing.”“A whole thing? You know them?”“Well, no. It’s just tribe stuff. Superstition.”My expression could have only been completely blank. Jacob laughed at me. “They’re like, sort of…legendary. In a bad way.”“I thought they were new here.”Jacob made a face. “It’s a long story.”I moved closer to him.“Well,” he started. “The first Quileutes. You know...”“I’m sorry,” I said. “If I ever knew this story, I forgot.”“No biggie.” He threw his arms up and leaned down. I noticed Mike watching us. “The first Quileutes were wolves that turned into humans. Their leader was Ka’wa’iti. He taught the wolves about being human and created powerful men. I think this is all on our Wikipedia page.”“Right.”“Lots of stories about Ka’wa’iti, and lots of stories about wolves. But there’s one story that isn’t about them at all. It’s about the cold ones.”“The cold ones?” I leaned forward.“Yeah. If you believe the stories,” his voice made it clear that he didn’t. “Then my great-grandfather was the one who made the treaty to keep them off our land.”I raised my eyebrows, enthralled. Jacob settled back, his elbow sinking into my thigh. “Yeah. So, the cold ones were the natural enemies of the wolf – well, the wolf-men.”“Wolf-men have enemies?” I asked skeptically.“Only one.” This time, his pause had the intended effect. I shivered.He burst out laughing. “You should see the look on your face.”I smacked him on the shoulder. “You didn’t make that up, did you?”“No, I swear to God its true – well, it’s a real legend, anyway. It’s just one of the more ridiculous ones.”“I don’t understand.”“Well, I’m not as good at storytelling as my dad is. You should really hear him spin one.” Jacob rolled his eyes. “The cold ones were people. At least, they looked like people, but they were cannibal monsters. They hunted humans, including the Quileutes. But the ones that came to my great-grandfather – Ephraim Black – were different. They claimed they ate animals, just like the Quileutes, and that they weren’t a danger to Ephraim’s people. So they made a truce. If these particular cold ones would stay off of Quileute land and never kill a human, we wouldn’t expose them to the pale-faces.” He gestured to my friends. I held back a laugh.“So they weren’t cannibals, then, if they ate animals. They were just…people.”“Like I said, they only look like people. Eating human flesh warped their existence. It made them strong, and immortal. They had no blood, and ran almost as fast as the wolf-warriors.”My smile faded. “But they didn’t eat human flesh,” I pointed out.He shook his head. “Didn’t matter. They still weren’t human.”I hugged my arms to my chest, and Jacob mistook my expression for interest.“So, this is where it gets ridiculous. My dad – and some of the other elders – believe that the Cullens are the cold ones. The very same ones.”“Oh,” I said, looking out over the water. Clouds were rolling in, darkening the already murky waves.“You’re not actually scared, are you?” He snorted.“You’re a good storyteller.”He laughed again. “Just don’t tell the pale-faces.” His smile warmed me from the inside out – like part of me hadn’t forgotten our childhood friendship.“Bella,” a voice called. Of course it was Mike. “I think we’re about to pack it up. It looks like rain.” He gave Jacob a look and bent to help Ben with the cooler.“Is that your boyfriend?” Jacob asked at the possessive tone in Mike’s voice.“Absolutely not,” I whispered.“You should come down sometime,” he said. “Or if anything goes wrong with the truck you could let me look at it.”“I’m sure you’ll be seeing me. Charlie wants me to meet Billy. Or…re-meet him, I guess.”“Cool,” he said. We both stood up, and to my surprise, he hugged me. “Glad I caught you!”“Bye, Jake.” He smiled at the nickname. “I’ll see you soon.”The bottom of the sky dropped out on the drive back to Newton’s. Eric slowed way down, glancing nervously at me like I would drop into a PTSD episode at the slightest provocation. Jessica was roping me into a shopping trip in Port Angeles the next weekend, and I was so preoccupied with Jacob’s story that I agreed to it. I needed warmer clothing, anyway.Jacob had not told me that story so I would believe it. He thought it was funny. But I wondered if he had ever actually met one of the Cullens, and I wondered what he would say if I showed him the bruises that still marked my hips.
________________________

Edythe
I was on high alert. If any mind in the school so much as thought Bella Swan’s name, I was listening. This was a much higher degree of focus than I had ever expended in my gift, and I relied on my siblings to make up for my distraction by calling to attention when I needed to act human.Edythe, Emmett thought sharply. Our Spanish professor had called on me.“En el condicional,” I responded, finding the answer in the teacher’s thoughts.Bella Swan was a faint buzz all over the school, but the minds most familiar with her lit up like fireflies for me. There was Jessica Stanley, judgmental in the extreme, who was more concerned with Bella’s appearance than what she was saying. “What’s wrong?” She asked Bella, noticing something discontented in the girl’s face. Bella pushed dark hair away from her face, shaking her head. Jessica was jealous of her hair, her skin, her lips – these things flashed through her mind, frustratingly edited. I would prefer she just pictured all of it at once instead of making me take in details that were irrelevant.“It’s Tyler,” Bella Swan said. She had her phone out beneath the desk. “Did you give him my number?”“No,” Jessica said, a lie.
“Well, he won’t stop blowing up my phone. He wants to take me out to dinner to apologize.”
He likes her, Jessica thought. Everyone does. She pictured Mike Newton with a burst of rabid jealousy. He was almost as simple as she was. They deserved each other. “Are you gonna say yes?”“Say yes,” Bella scoffed. “Where would he even take me? Forks basically has one restaurant and it’s a diner. And Charlie already wants to kill the guy. And, also, I don’t like Tyler.”Bella Swan called her father by his first name. I took note of this. Jessica did not.Oh, she does like Mike, she thought with despair. Well, I don’t stand a chance now.“I’m not going to out with someone who hit me with their car,” Bella continued, more unguarded than Jessica had ever seen her. “And I’m definitely not going to go out with someone because they hit me with their car. Almost hit me,” she amended.“No, totally,” Jessica said. The events of the crash replayed in her head. It certainly had looked like Bella was crushed. Jessica Stanley – all of the witnesses – didn’t notice me at all. Human memory was so unreliable. Even if she had seen me, it was just as likely she had written it out as it wouldn’t have made sense with her idea of time and space. I wished the same could be said of Bella Swan. “That was horrible. So scary.” Jessica meant this. She had been scared.“I guess so,” Bella Swan muttered. It irritated me that she didn’t elaborate.Thoughts of her led me to Mike Newton in another building, then Tyler Crowley, then Eric Yorkie. They were all thinking of her, and over the course of an hour I discovered that each of them was planning on asking Bella to the girl’s choice dance in two weeks. I begrudgingly agreed with Jessica’s confusion when it came to Bella– what was it that they liked so much about her?I focused back on Jessica as I walked to my next class. When should I ask him? She fretted, watching Mike and Bella walking in front of her. I wonder if Bella was going to ask anyone…I’ll just have to get to Mike before she does.High school drama was rarely entertaining, but I found myself eager to see how this was all going to play out. I relayed everything to Emmett in a voice too low for anyone else to hear. He hung onto every word, letting off a loud guffaw of laughter that had the teacher giving us a hard look.Emmett enjoyed inane drama. He and Alice’s favorite “family night” activity was making us watch reality television. Everyone but the two of them found it completely unbearable, especially the one about models. But this business with the girl’s choice dance was right up their alley – at least it should have been. Alice was still shutting me out.Imagine the look on Newton’s face, Emmett thought, if you asked him. His heart would straight-up liquefy.Patently ridiculous. Bella was in Spanish now, with Angela Weber. I had been vaguely aware of this person before. Her mind was unusually mature, compassionate and reserved in a way that reminded me of Esme. “I think I’m going to ask Ben,” she was saying, disappointing me by being as interested as everyone else in the dance. Ben Chaney was in History with me – I glanced at the back of his head.“You should,” Bella said to her, smiling.
“You really don’t want to go? You could ask Eric or Mike.”
Bella nodded absently. “Maybe!”A non-answer. But all my careful scanning had given me nothing. Bella had told no one about the crash. In fact, she had not seemed to mention me or my family at all since the previous week. I didn’t think I was missing anything, I just wanted to know why. I almost wished she would just tell everyone the truth. Then I wouldn’t have to bother with the mystery of her.Bella was on the way to lunch, I saw through Mike Newton. This is it, he thought anxiously. “Hey, Bella?” He stopped walking, putting a hand on her arm. She slowed to a stop, eyeing him warily. His thoughts of her were all centered on her face. I was forced into seeing only close-ups – pale eyes, bitten lips, thick eyebrows.“What’s up?” She asked with trepidation.Oh, man, she’s so pretty. “Um, so, there’s this dance coming up, two weeks, actually –” The look on Bella Swan’s face gave him no pause. “I was wondering if you would…go with me?”Her mouth gaped open for a moment.
“I thought it was girl’s choice.”
“It is,” he said sheepishly. “And, um, Jessica already asked me.”I had heard this happen while Bella was in Spanish. Jessica was catatonic.“So ... why wouldn’t you go with her?” Bella asked.Mike was starting to catch on. He looked down at his feet. “I thought since you were new, you might want a date or something…”“I appreciate it, Mike, but I’ll be in Seattle that weekend,” she said firmly. “You should tell Jessica yes. She likes you.”Mike was upset, but not angry. He wasn’t so opposed to going with Jessica. I heard he and Bella enter the lunchroom, far behind my back. Jessica seethed from her table, unused to rejection.“Any updates?” Emmett asked, looking at my amused expression. I caught him up to speed while Rosalie tried not to be interested.She’s annoyed, Jasper supplied, feeling it even across the room. I watched Bella Swan through his eyes, not willing to give myself away by turning to look. Her face was indeed pinched.“Maybe she smells good to humans, too,” Emmett said. The comment had my throat burning, and I suddenly dreaded going to Biology. Alice, unusually quiet, was flipping through weather patterns – just as she had that morning. Surely the weather couldn’t have changed its mind.I glared at her. She avoided my gaze.No clue, Jasper thought when I looked to him.“She hasn’t said anything?” Rosalie asked. It seemed to be her most desperate wish. I shook my head.I arrived at Biology before Bella did, which gave me a moment to steel myself and gather a reserve of fresh air. Across campus, Jessica’s thoughts lit up as Mike agreed to go to the dance with her.I shifted in my seat, trying not to let my intense concentration give away the fact that I wasn’t human, and set my pen between my teeth as though I was chewing on it. I was gazing out the window when Bella arrived. She hesitated in the doorway for a second before coming to sit. I held my breath as the warmth of her body washed over my cold one. So warm - almost uncomfortable. Whatever guardian of fate that demanded Bella’s death wanted me to suffer as much as possible. If I was going to hold my breath, then it would be my skin that burned instead of my throat.Mike and Eric followed, Mike sulking straight to his seat. I fought a sudden smile. Eric didn’t have this class.“Hey, Bella,” he said.Her voice was surprised. “Eric?”Mike eavesdropped intently. Eric was convinced Bella was going to say yes – and he wanted Mike to hear it. I was almost impressed with the showmanship of it all.“So, I wanted to ask you to go to this dance thing with me. Just as friends.” It was very clear in his mind that this was not the case.Bella was silent for a beat. Her heart beat faster. “I’m going to be out of town that weekend.”Eric wasn’t picturing her face. He was looking at the wall, her hands, her (ugh) chest. I wanted to look and see her expression for myself, but kept still. “Don’t you think you could reschedule or something?” He asked.“No,” Bella said flatly. “I can’t. You’re going to be late for class.”She slammed her notebook on the desk with finality. Mike was euphoric in the back of the room, and Eric was aghast. He almost argued, but the bell rang as though to prove her point. Bella exhaled loudly when he was gone.I wanted desperately to say something, anything, but I couldn’t. I didn’t want to have to breathe if I could avoid it. Furthermore, I didn’t know what I would say. I just held the urge, and I held it until the bell because Bella Swan neither looked at or spoke to me. Banner imposed no group work on us. Bella left with Mike Newton.As I waited in traffic after school, watching out for less experienced drivers around my Volvo, Tyler Crowley’s mind flickered for my attention. He was approaching Bella’s car, which was – grace of all graces – right in front of us.“Em,” I said, nodding. Emmett leaned up from the backseat to watch. I shot forward, creating a small jam as three other cars maneuvered around me. Bella Swan could not move until I did. Inside her truck, she gave a sharp sigh.“What now?” Rosalie asked. Alice, beside me, watched the impending interaction with interest.“Tyler Crowley is about to ask her to the dance,” I said. Emmet made a cooing sound. Rosalie begrudgingly sat back to watch the scene unfold. I noticed distantly that Jasper felt a roll of anxiety come off of Alice.Tyler Crowley tapped on Bella’s window, startling her into looking up from her phone.“Oh, god,” she muttered. Her window rolled manually down. “Tyler? What’s, uh…going on?”“Nothing, actually…I just wanted to talk to you.”Bella looked like she might be sick. “Look, I told you. No hard feelings, whatever Ch- my dad said to you. He’ll get over it, I talked to him – ““Bella,” he said. Like Eric, he lacked self-doubt, but he was all uncomfortable earnestness. “I really like you.” Here, Bella blinked. “I think – well, there’s the dance coming up – ““Ten bucks says she goes with him,” Jasper murmured suddenly, always going against the odds.“You’re on,” Emmett and I said in unison.Bella’s face had flushed darker than usual, in anger or embarrassment. “I’m not going to be in town, Tyler,” she said gently.“Yeah, Mike said that.”“Then why -?”“I figured you were letting him down easy. Come on, he’s…Mike.”“I–” I heard her teeth grind together. “I’m really going out of town, Tyler. Sorry.”“Oh. Well, that’s alright. Maybe we could,” he shrugged, “do something else? When you’re in town?”“God-damn, this is rough.” Emmett exclaimed. Teenagers, man. Always looking to get one in.Bella’s resolve seemed to waver. Alice focused on her face expectantly. Rosalie grew more cross by the millisecond.“I’m sorry, Tyler,” Bella finally said, not unkindly. “I’m just not…here for that. A – relationship.”Jasper sighed and two ten-dollar bills fluttered over Emmett’s head. He plucked one from the air and sat back with a satisfied sigh.I took the other one, shoving it into the center console while Tyler walked away disconsolate. Bella was still blushing furiously when she caught my eye and perhaps realized I had seen the whole thing. I found myself holding that pale gray gaze for much longer than I should have. Then I realized Alice was watching me, and I gunned it out of the parking lot.________________________
Bella
If anything could have distracted me from Edythe Cullen, it was three people asking me to the dance in a single day. I comforted myself that night by fantasizing about dropping out. Or just moving to Florida. Renée was now completely moved into the Jacksonville house. I'd gotten a FaceTime walkthrough Saturday evening, and it was beautiful. Small, but with so much light and only a short drive from the beach. Renée had already started talking about flying me out for Christmas, but I was less sure. I thought Charlie was under the impression I would be in Forks for the holidays, and I was unwilling to bring it up at all in case he assumed I wanted to leave just by virtue of bringing it up.The Seattle excuse had been cleared with him. It was a long drive, though, and I could tell it made him anxious. I told him I would have Jacob Black look at Thing before I went, and that seemed to cheer him up. I would figure out what to do in Seattle once I got there. It had interesting bookstores and upscale shops, and most importantly I wouldn’t be in Forks at a girl’s choice dance. Blegh.I hated that Edythe had seen my interaction with Tyler. Even if she couldn’t have known what we were talking about, she had heard the Eric thing as well, and I wondered if she would use that to torture me. But she wasn’t at lunch the day after that, so I entertained the cautious relief that she had gone off on another sick leave.Mike was acting normal towards me, and Eric seemed unable to meet my eyes. The only person I felt bad about turning down was Tyler, and I was trying to stop feeling bad. It wasn’t my problem if they’d all gotten it into their heads to compete for the new girl as a trophy. At least Jessica hadn’t turned against me in her pursuit of Mike.“Alice Cullen is staring at you,” she said, leaning across the table to me suddenly. Mid-chew, I turned my head toward the Cullens’ table. The smallest of them, short hair fanning around her head in perfect waves, was indeed looking right at me. When I made eye contact, she didn’t look away. A line formed on her forehead.I raised my eyebrows at Jessica, the back of my neck burning. “I don’t know why.”“Weird,” she said, eyes wide.Edythe wasn’t in Biology. I sat alone at our desk, wondering where she was and why her sister would be staring at me like that. Maybe Edythe wasn’t the only one who hated me, or maybe she had shared her reasons with her siblings. I wished someone would tell me.Mrs. Banner came in with a tray of small boxes in her arms. “Michael, June, could you pass these out? Okay, guys, I want you to all take one piece from each box,” she produced a pair of rubber gloves and pulled them on. “The first should be an indicator card.” At the word indicator, my stomach flipped. Michael set a box down in front of me. “Next will be the applicator, and the barb. I’ll be coming around with a dropper of water to prepare your cards, so please don’t start until I say so.”Nausea enveloped me. Mrs. Banner started in the front, showing them where to prick their fingers. I saw June Wollberg stab her finger with a needle and clammy moisture broke out across my forehead. I reached for my box, realizing that the class activity was going forward without me, but Mrs. Banner noticed my hesitance and came over.“Are you alright, Bella, honey?” She asked me.“I already know my blood type.”“You look faint. Is it the blood? Needles?”I nodded, feeling my stomach heave as a wave of copper scented air hit my nose. “A mixture, I think. It happened last time, too.”“Can someone help Bella to the nurse, please?” She called. I didn’t have to look up to know it would be Mike who volunteered.“Can you walk?” She asked suddenly, mistaking my grimace of annoyance for pain.“Yes.” I stood up, but Mike put his arm around my waist anyway. I went ahead and leaned against him on the way out of the classroom. It was actually kind of nice to be held – he was stronger than he looked. Outside in the cold, crisp air, I felt immediately better, but I milked it in case Mrs. Banner was watching through the large windows.“Just let me sit,” I told Mike when we had rounded a corner. I pried myself off of him and sat – his hands hovering around my shoulders as I did – to put my head between my knees.“You’re green, Bella,” Mike said anxiously. I felt his hand on my back and prayed Jessica couldn’t see us from whichever classroom she was in.“I know,” I said. “I’ve been worse. Just let me…”“Swan?” Came another voice – very close by. I squeezed my eyes shut as another wave of nausea erupted, this time in my head. Please, no.“Did you hurt her?” Edythe asked tonelessly.“I – I think she’s scared of needles,” Mike said. His hand was still on me. “I don’t know what happened – she didn’t even prick her finger.”“Can you hear me?” The voice was closer to my ear.“No,” I groaned.“I’ll take her,” Edythe said suddenly.“What? I’m supposed to do it,” Mike protested. Then his hand was off, and another hand was on my arm. It hauled me up, ungently, and wound around my back. The difference between this arm and Mike’s was laughable. I had known – obviously and unfortunately – that Edythe Cullen was strong. This was like an iron bar supporting me. I was powerless to the force that began towing me off before I had opened my eyes.“Hey!” Mike called, already ten paces behind us. Edythe ignored him.“Put me back,” I told her. “I’ll be fine in a few minutes.”She looked ahead, walking us too-quickly toward the front office. There was a very determined fire in her brilliant gold eyes. I couldn’t speak, looking at her. Something struck me dumb. The Cullens all looked perfect from afar, but it was even more true up close. I was touching Edythe Cullen’s shoulder, gripping for dear life, and she felt like solid muscle.Her complexion was still bright, but more natural than in the hospital. A rosy cast covered her cheeks, her lips pursed and a naturally flushed peach. Eyebrows curved perfectly over her eyes and her jaw squared off in a soft way. Her nose was long and straight, meeting an equally straight brow which cast a shadow onto her feline eyes. That smell that had stuck in my memory all weekend soothed the worst of my symptoms.Oddly, I wondered what she thought of me in my oversized sweater and torn jeans. As though in answer, Edythe said: “You look like hell.”This ruined the illusion a bit. I made to stop. I dug my heels into the pavement. It didn’t seem to make a difference. Her fingers wound into my overcoat (would I have bruises there later?) and her hips bumped into mine and I kept moving. If I had gone completely limp, I doubt it would have affected her.“And you faint at the sight of blood.” This seemed to amuse her. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. The nausea was fading. I focused on individual steps, hoping I wouldn’t trip. Much sooner than seemed possible, Edythe was shoving open the door to the building.“Oh my,” a voice gasped.“She fainted in Biology,” Edythe said. I exhaled in a rush, and she suddenly let go of me, moving as far as she could from me in the narrow room. I staggered forward a step.“Blood typing?” Sharon inquired. I nodded. “There’s always one.” She turned to one of the back rooms. “Mrs. Hill?”Edythe laughed under her breath, following as the nurse appeared and pulled me behind the front desk into a room the size of a closet, pointing me at the little patient bed and bustling off again. I sat on the bed, taking deep breaths to stave off the dizziness. And Edythe was there.“Why weren’t you in class?” I asked, to fill the sudden silence.“Ditching is healthy,” was all she said. The nurse came back in with an ice pack and told me to put it on my head.“You can go back to class now,” she told Edythe.“I’m supposed to stay with her.” Edythe said this with such assured authority that the nurse didn’t argue. I held the ice to my head and watched her carefully, waiting. This felt different from our previous interactions. Was she going to turn hostile soon? I wanted to be ready for the next mood swing.“I got scared for a minute,” she said suddenly, when the nurse wandered off. “I thought Newton had snapped and was dragging you off to have his way with you.”I grimaced. It was a morbid joke. “What, you just ditch and walk around campus all day?” I was feeling much better now. The ice pack wasn’t even as cold as the ground had been.“I was in my car listening to music.”The nurse came back in, asking me a few questions about what I’d had for breakfast. The door to the room sat open, and I saw another person from my class helped in by Mike. They had a cotton wad stuck to their finger. The icy blast of air roused me, and I hopped up.“Let them have the bed – I’m fine.”I squeezed past Mike to the doors, pushing through them and taking a deep breath of icy air. Edythe followed me, much too close for comfort.“You’re pretty squeamish, huh?” She said, half smirking.In through the nose, out through the mouth. “It’s the smell more than anything.”Her eyes went wide. “You can smell blood?”I didn’t answer, because Mike had rushed after us.        “Hey, Bella. Going back to class?”Edythe wrinkled her nose like he was something she picked off her shoe.“I’d just have to come right back, Mike,” I said.“Yeah, I guess… so…” he glanced at Edythe and his eyes narrowed. “I’ll wait with you.”“You don’t need to do that,” I said. Edythe cut her eyes to me in an unexpectedly conspiratorial way. One eyebrow quirked up.“Are you sure?” Mike asked. He was clearly worried about me.“I am her lab partner,” Edythe said, affecting a rather severe look, like Mike had been unforgivably stupid thus far.Mike looked between us with a hurt expression. I didn’t move. “Okay. See you,” he said to me, escaping via the nearest sidewalk.I shuddered, thinking of him touching me. “Why are you talking to me?” I asked. “You don’t like me.”Edythe uncrossed her arms. “Will you walk with me? Just until you feel better.”Her eyes bored into mine. Almost against my will (but not quite), I nodded. It wasn’t like I had anything better to do. Edythe led me to the parking lot – to the same shiny silver car that had blocked my path yesterday. I frowned when she motioned for me to get in.“Are we going somewhere?”She sighed like this was a ridiculous question. “We are going nowhere. Just get in.”I sat in the leather seat. The car smelled brand new. This felt like a trap of sorts, but I had no desire to stop it or to leave.Edythe pressed something on the dash, a dash that made Thing look like a cave painting, and music started playing. It was a song I recognized, and that put me at ease. “I want to hear your theories,” she said. She sat back and looked forward at the parking lot, at the clouds and the trees.“Theories?”“Yes. You haven’t blabbed to everyone about what happened. I can’t – I want to know why.”I copied her posture, looking forward into the dead-eyed cars. I could see Thing sitting patiently to the left on the opposite row. It was warmer now than on Friday, and there was no ice, but my teeth chattered with cold. I hadn’t expected to see Edythe, and I definitely hadn’t planned on this conversation.“Are you admitting that something happened?” I asked, figuring we should start at the beginning.“You did almost die,” Edythe allowed. “That certainly happened.”So much remained up in the air. I got the feeling she wasn’t going to cooperate unless I got a lot more specific.“You have super speed,” I started. “And you’re stronger than you should be.”She tapped her fingers on her leg. “If that’s really what you think…” I narrowed my eyes. “Why didn’t you tell anyone?”“I told you I wouldn’t. And it’s like you said. No one would believe me.”“You’re probably right,” she said, staring straight ahead.“But you’re still worried that I will?” I guessed. I obviously hit a nerve – she looked at me sharply, losing some of her careful composure. She wasn’t as calm and aloof as she wanted me to think.“I’m not,” she said.I gestured to the car. “Why else did you drag me way out here?”“Just trying to prove something,” she muttered, almost too quietly for me to hear.“You want theories?” I asked, when she didn’t say anything else. She lifted one eyebrow. “I mean, you look like a track star, but that wouldn’t explain how you got there so fast. It also wouldn’t explain your strength. Or the way you look.” I shifted so I could face her more directly, watching her expression. “Were you bitten by a radioactive spider? Super-soldier serum?” If she understood my references, it didn’t show. Only the slightest tilt to her head made me feel like she was listening at all. “I guess I’ll never understand how you did it…but can I ask why?”Her blank expression curved into a frown. “Why?” She asked hoarsely.“Yeah. Why? You’re nice to me sometimes and openly hostile others. You ignore me in the halls…I just didn’t have time to do anything to you. It was on my first day here that you–” I broke off, feeling a flush in my face.She scrunched her nose, then shut her eyes and took a deliberate, deep breath. Counting down from ten in her head to avoid strangling me. “That I what?” She asked.“You know what happened,” I said, sounding much surer than I felt. “I still don’t.”“Your theories are unimaginative,” Edythe said, brushing over it entirely. “I suppose you aren’t as smart as I thought.”“Excuse me?”She just shook her head.I grit my teeth. “There you go again – crazy bitch mode. Well, if it’s torturing you so much that you saved me, maybe you’ll get lucky and I’ll break my neck walking back to class.”“It does seem like a possibility,” Edythe said.I got out of the car and slammed the door as hard as I could. As I stomped – carefully – back across the cement, she turned her music up to blasting inside her car, bass thumping in the ground. I couldn’t remember the last time I had felt so infuriated.I went through the rest of my day in a black mood, so black that even Charlie noticed as he got home. I was dicing tomatoes with extreme prejudice. “Jeez, Bells,” he said over the sound of the knife. “Hope it’s not me you’re mad at.” He hung his jacket and gun and sat at the kitchen table with a groan. I shook my head, sweeping the tomatoes into a bowl. “Where’s the meat?”“Just salad,” I said, knowing it would disappoint him. “That, uh. Chicken from the supermarket turned gray.”“How was school?” He asked. “Anything exciting happen?”I forked a collection of lettuce and toppings onto my plate, smothering it in Italian dressing. Charlie also took a large portion, with one eye on the freezer where there was a half-hidden box of ice cream sandwiches. I couldn’t taste anything.“Did I tell you that Edythe Cullen is my lab partner in Biology?”Charlie shook his head. “No, but I’m glad to hear it! Smart kids. She was there to see you in the hospital right after the accident.”Like I didn’t remember. “Yeah,” I said. “We did blood typing today, and – ““Oh,” Charlie interrupted, laughing. “You and needles.”I wasn’t sure how he knew that, maybe there was some pre-schism Forks incident where he’d taken me for a shot.“I almost completely fainted. She had to take me to the nurse.”“That’s nice,” he said, oblivious. “You can’t catch a break at that school, huh?”I scraped at my plate, then realized Charlie was being serious. “I didn’t expect my first week to go smoothly. I mean, it’s me.” Granted, it had gone much, much worse than I could have anticipated. And yet it was still better than it could have been. I was alive, for starters, the reason why was just unbelievably complicated. “But…” I looked at my salad. “I like it here, Dad. I’m really glad to be here, making friends and…”“Good,” Charlie said, clearing his throat.“And being with you,” I said in a rush. It was not easy to get the words out. “It’s so different from living with Renée.”Charlie froze like a gunshot had gone off, not at my admission but at my mom’s name. “I know,” he said. “We don’t have to…talk about it.”That made my stomach drop. I had finally spit out something of substance, and I was unsure if Charlie even heard it. Or he did, and he didn’t want to talk about it. I just assumed he meant Renée, but maybe I shouldn’t have. Whenever my mother came up, I was reminded that Charlie was a person, which was completely silly but true. Maybe I was being too self-centered in all of this.Maybe, I thought, picking at my salad, I was imposing something over Charlie that he really didn’t need.__________________________ Edythe ditched again the next day. We finished up the lesson on blood typing and antibodies. I was instructed to simply observe the group at the desk behind me, as was the other guy who’d gotten queasy. He sat in Edythe’s empty chair and we giggled and averted our eyes when the textbook displayed needles and blood.Angela and Jessica had moved the shopping trip up to Friday night, proposing we leave right after school. This was fine with me, although it brought up an uncomfortable consideration regarding my curfew with Charlie. Since Port Angeles was just over an hour away we wouldn’t be back until ten, or later. Charlie didn’t blink at this, just told me to lock up if he was in bed before I returned. He didn’t even latch onto the fact that they were shopping for a dance. He didn’t even ask me if I was going!No cars hit me, or almost hit me, and I had no more invitations to Edythe Cullen’s car. She didn’t talk to me at all for the remainder of the week except for extremely sparse, polite collaboration on schoolwork when necessary. Friday it rained heavily, a pattering, ice-cold background to a long day of counting the seconds. At four I waited under the gymnasium overhang with my umbrella for Angela and Jess to come meet me.Jess had changed into a spaghetti strap top and a cardigan that hung off her shoulders. Angela was wearing the same outfit as she had all day but let her hair down and added deep red lipstick. The effect was surprisingly alluring.“What the fuck!” Jessica exclaimed when she saw me, huddling close beneath my umbrella, “You said you’d be slutty. Even Ang slutted it up.”Angela gave a deadpan “yeah” and headed toward the lot.“I’ll change in the car,” I promised.“Why? Didn’t you just change anyway for P.E.?”I shushed her. She took the umbrella from my hands and held it over us, winding one arm through mine. My outfit of choice had been pulled from the Phoenix suitcase – I threw my body into the back row of Jessica’s Jeep and pulled it on. The tights were the worst part, then the blue denim skirt and maroon sweater. I had already had on my combat boots.“There,” I said, sitting up and climbing back into the second row of seats. Jessica was already on the interstate. “I’m a freezing cold slut.”“It will do,” Jessica said with a cursory look over her shoulder. “Makeup?”“I didn’t realize that was a prerequisite.”“Here.” Angela passed back a zipper pouch from her purse. “Take your pick.”It wasn’t the easiest of feats to apply lipstick in a moving vehicle without a mirror. Jessica forced me to add red eyeliner and a small amount of blush.“Yes, Bella! Liner does wonders for your eyes. You always look so drab.”“Thank you,” I said, giving Angela a look.Jessica drove fast, so we made it to Port Angeles in less than an hour. We passed around the aux cord, taking turns with the music while Jessica regaled us with tales of courting Mike Newton. I googled bookstores and places to get outerwear in Port Angeles, which seemed like a total tourist trap. It was bigger than Forks, and much more polished, with the added charm of being almost directly on the strait that separated Washington and British Columbia. There was a Main Street, with a litany of different things. We walked along the busy sidewalks and entered a consignment shop.Angela and Jessica picked through the selection slowly, keeping up a quiet conversation. They both seemed surprised when I said I had never been to a dance before. “Why not?” Jessica asked, half accusing.“No one asked me.”“I don’t believe that,” Angela said.“People ask you out here,” Jessica pulled a short black thing off of the rack. “And you tell them no.”“Except for Tyler,” Angela amended.“What did you say?”She looked up. “Tyler told everyone he was taking you to prom. At least, he told Eric and Ben that.”“He said what?”“Told you,” Angela murmured to Jessica.“Do you think he’ll stop trying to apologize if I hit him with my car?” I chose a pale pink dress and handed it to Angela. “Seriously, what is going on with the people in this town?”“That might stop him,” Jessica giggled. “If that’s why he’s doing it.”I sat in a chair outside the dressing room while they tried things on. Angela came out first in a long black dress with straps that went around the sides of the shoulders. I told her I liked it, of course, but she shook her head and drew the curtain back. Jessica came out in something I hadn’t expected.It was interesting, with a flowy skirt that looked to be made for dancing, in a deep purple. The bust of it showed just enough of her cleavage that I noticed. She admired herself in the mirror.“What do you think?”“I think you look amazing, Jess!”“What about the girls?” She turned and posed for me. I had to admit – they looked amazing. I told her as much, and she promptly decided to buy it. I was sort of shocked – Jessica wasn’t a girl I thought would shop so quickly. Angela took longer but ended up choosing a shorter navy dress with a chiffon overlay. She looked like a princess.They wanted to go to a shoe store next. I followed, on the lookout for sneaker sales. “So,” Jessica said, turning her foot around in front of an ankle-height mirror. “Mike said you and Edythe Cullen hate each other.”I turned from a Nike display. “No.”“No?”“No, I don’t hate her. We’re just lab partners, and she’s…something else.”“Oh, tell me about it,” Jess agreed, lacing up stiletto straps. “I tried to talk to all of them when they first moved down, but they’re anti-social as fuck.”She had already said as much to me. “I’ve only talked to Edythe,” I admitted. “What about you, Angela?”Angela shrugged her shoulders and sighed. “I try to stay out of it.”“Yes, Ang loves turning the other cheek. She’s always inspiring the rest of us to do better.” Jessica shot Angela a toothy smile. “I told her I’d stop gossiping this year.”I was consistently surprised by any mention of their being friends before I arrived. They were polar opposites. “Sorry to harp on it, but I think Edythe Cullen is very strange.”Angela chewed her cheek. “They are strange. I haven’t ever talked to Edythe, but Mr. and Mrs. Cullen are really nice. So is Emmett, according to Ben. They had Geometry together last year and he had to help him a lot.”“If they’re bad at math,” Jessica said, “we can kill them.”At our blank stares, she blushed. “You haven’t seen Predator?”“I just think that people are way too quick to judge.” Angela looked at me. “But I’m sorry if Edythe Cullen has been a bully.”“I wouldn’t call her a bully.” It was too complex for that. And I didn’t think anyone was too quick to judge the Cullens. If anyone knew half of what I knew they’d be judging much harder. In fact, the Quileutes seemed to be on the right track. “Just unpleasant.”It was getting dark before they had found any shoes, and they had two more stores they wanted to get to before we ate dinner at the Italian restaurant nearby. I suggested I meet up with them since I was looking for something different. They wanted to come with me, but I assured them I would be quick.So I followed the strip of stores alone, looking for anything promising. A group of men whistled at me, calling something I didn’t catch. I walked faster, glad I hadn’t changed at school where any of my would-be suiters would see.After a few turns I found an outdoor supply shop. The back half was apparel. It was pricy, but I had car money saved up. I bought an overcoat that was similar to Charlie’s, but my size, and gray, then found a waterproof sweater and rain jacket to go with it. I found some brown hiking boots on sale and grabbed those, as well. It took a bit longer than I thought it would, despite my lack of pickiness. I was now in a hurry.The store had two exits. I took the back one, thinking it would take me back to the main strip quicker. I was wrong. It was getting dark, and I pulled out my phone to find my footing. According to the GPS, I was facing the wrong way. I turned around. I put my back to the water and walked fast. If I turned left at the corner at the end of the street, I would be going the right way.A group of men rounded that very corner. I kept my head down as I passed them. One of them whistled at me, again, and my heart started to speed up.“Hey there!” One of them called. I didn’t look up, and didn’t relax until I had rounded the corner. But the next street was totally empty, with blank storefronts and no people. I trudged on, too scared to slow down and look at the directions.That’s when I heard footsteps. I half-turned. Two of them were walking behind me. I held my bags tighter to my sides, walking as fast as I could without running. I just had to get back to the main road… A blue car turned and sped down the street. I had the wild thought to jump out in front of it, but didn’t.It seemed to take forever for me to get to that next corner. I kept my pace steady, the men behind me falling ever so slightly farther behind with every step. Maybe they realized they had scared me and were sorry. I saw two cars going north pass the intersection I was heading for, and I exhaled in relief. There would be more people around once I got off this deserted street. I skipped around the corner with a grateful sigh. Then I stopped.I had, somehow, impossibly, taken another wrong turn. More unlit buildings lined the streets. And there, not that far ahead of me, were the other two guys. I wasn’t being followed. I was being herded. Was I going in fucking circles?I paused for only a second, but it felt like a very long time. The footsteps behind me were louder now. I walked forward.“There you are!” The booming voice of the stocky, dark-haired man shattered the intense quiet and made me jump.“Yeah,” a voice called loudly behind me, making me jump again as I tried to hurry down the street. “We just took a little detour.”My steps had to slow now. I could usually shout pretty loudly, so I sucked in air, preparing to call for help, but my throat was so dry I wasn’t sure how much volume I could manage. I knew next to nothing about self-defense.“Get away from me,” I warned in a voice that was supposed sound strong and fearless. But I was right about the dry throat—no volume. I turned to face both groups, my back to the street.“Don’t be like that,” the shortest one said. Being directly addressed struck absolute terror into my chest.I braced myself, feet apart. I wasn’t exceptionally strong, but I was scrappy. I could probably do some damage. And there was always the standard knee to the groin, of course. A pessimistic voice in my mind spoke up then, reminding me that I probably didn’t have a chance against one of them, and there were four. “You’re not from around here,” one of them said, stepping closer to me. I stepped back, stumbling over my feet.The squealing of tires distracted all of us, loud and reminiscent of my near-death experience at school. The one that had happened exactly a week ago. A pair of headlights sped down the street. This time, I did jump in front of it. If I got hit and killed it would only be poetic justice.Just as I moved to do it, the car skidded around in a near circle. A massive red Jeep immediately and obviously worth thousands of dollars more than Jessica’s. Right in front of my face, the passenger door flew open as though kicked.“Get in,” a high-pitched voice commanded me. Without thinking, I jumped up and scrambled into the seat. The car started moving before I had shut the door. In a flash of headlights, the men scrambled out of the way. The car squealed toward them onto the curb with a brain-shaking bump, then shot forward onto the street.I looked to see who it was that saved me. Alice Cullen, impossibly tiny in the driver’s seat, gave me a wide-eyed look.“Seriously, Bella. Walking around alone at night?”I just gaped – speechless. She took a right turn so hard I was thrown nearly on top of her.“Buckle up,” she said, shoving me back to my side with incongruous strength. I put the belt around me with shaky hands. “Are you okay?”“Am I…what?”“Did they touch you?” She said, louder, with a ton of urgency that in no way made things clearer to me.“No!” She collapsed down into the seat with a relieved breath. “What are you doing!?”“Rescuing you.”“How – ““– did I know where you were? Call it a hunch.”The car came to a sudden stop, throwing me forward in my belt. We were at the Italian restaurant. I looked at it through the window, then looked back at Alice. Then I did it once more for good measure. For a moment, the car was filled with only the sound of my breathing.“Are you in shock?” Alice asked, wringing her hands. “Try to slow your breathing. It sounds like your heart is gonna explode.”Her voice sounded like a bell, high and ringing.“I don’t understand what’s happening,” I managed to say. A bad, burpy sensation was crawling up my throat, which most likely meant I was about to start vomiting. I gasped in a breath and held it.“Yeah.” Alice leaned her head back against the seat with a sigh. “I didn’t know if I would get this far.”“What?”“You have questions.”“I…well, yeah.” Like I just said: What?“Yes, I know you must. The thing is,” she said slowly, “I can’t…answer them?”“You don’t even know what I’m going to ask.”“I was in town. I saw what was happening to you and intervened.” She gave me a stern look, and I just nodded. “Good, so that’s that explained. The other thing, Bella,” she said my name like we had already met, “is that you need to give Edythe a chance.”“Edythe?”“Yes. You and Edythe…could be good for each other.” She looked at me with an expression I didn’t understand. “I know that she makes it difficult, but just talk to her.”“I…sure. Yep. Uh-huh,” I said. I just wanted out of the car. “So…thank you?”I made to open the door, and Alice moved quickly, putting a hand on my arm. I gasped, and she pulled away. Her hand was ice cold.I heard Jacob Black’s voice – the cold ones. I let his story color my vision as I looked at Alice – a strange-looking girl. Dark eyes, but maybe gold, it was difficult to tell. Like Edythe, like Dr. Cullen, her face was oddly perfect in its formation despite some small imperfections. Skin, glowing even in the low light of the dashboard. It was not a face that was the sum of its parts.“I know this doesn’t make sense to you right now,” Alice said. That was one hell of an understatement. “But you and I are going to be great friends, too.”“This is the weirdest conversation I’ve ever had,” I said bluntly. She laughed a high, tinkling laugh.“Your friends will be looking for you. You’ll get home safe.” There was a strange twinkle in her eyes. I got out of the car and the Jeep pulled off, very fast but without any squealing. I looked after it, wondering if anything would ever make sense to me again.Jessica called me then. I let the phone buzz in my hand, slowing my breathing down to a manageable rate. I had no idea which part of my night I would lose the most sleep over.________________________ Edythe   Friday was very quiet at our house. Carlisle sat with Esme in his office discussing the upcoming hospital benefit, Jasper and Emmett played a racing game on the Xbox, and Rosalie sat in her bedroom following a YouTube makeup tutorial. I had a book from Carlisle’s library, a copy of a philosophy text from eighteenth century Nagpur. I was not fluent in Marathi, but Carlisle’s heavy annotation in the margins told me enough to parse it.Alice was out. Jasper’s thoughts returned to this every ten minutes or so, counting the time. She hadn’t told him where she was going, she had just left suddenly while I was out hunting with Emmett. He was slightly miffed that she had taken his car. She’d needed something speedy, less noticeable than the convertible…At this point Alice had avoided me for over a week. The longest was two months, and that had been when she’d tried to plan me a surprise party for my one hundredth, something I never asked for and staunchly opposed once it came to light. Of course by the time I found her out she’d already invited the entire Denali clan to visit. Only Carlisle had been in on it with her.Something told me this would be much worse than that. Something she knew I would absolutely hate. Rosalie sang along under her breath to the pop music playing in her headphones, painting her eyelids pink and violet. I joined in Jasper’s counting.Some four hours later, I heard Alice’s thought before I heard the car engine.Don’t be mad, she was thinking very insistently and on repeat.We all heard the Jeep’s engine pull onto the drive. Jasper sighed in relief. Emmett saw me go tense. “What’s wrong?” He asked.The engine cut off, still a good mile out from the house. Alice jumped lightly from the car, onto the dirt path. I had no choice, she thought. Jasper was next to me, sensing the massive shift in my mood.What happened? He asked me. “Alice?”“Everything’s fine,” she called to him. “Edythe – “I threw the front door open and was out to Alice in less than ten seconds. She stood a decent way from the Jeep, for some reason, with her arms clasped behind her.I didn’t want you to break anything, she informed me.Jasper appeared at her side, blocking her from me. I realized I had been crouched, ready to spring on her. I was filled to the brim with blind fury. I knew it would be bad, but this!The rest had followed us, sensing something about to go wrong. Or that something had already gone wrong. Esme was the only one to approach me. She settled her hands on my shoulders. “Alice?” She cautioned. She was fully aware of Alice’s love of provoking me.“I went to Port Angeles tonight,” Alice began, narrating the memories she revisited for my benefit. Jasper locked his eyes with mine and a forced calm settled over me. I snarled. Esme’s hands tightened on me, kneading. “Bella was going to be attacked. I had to stop it. I had to try!”I grimaced at the vision she had seen. It was abhorrent, it made me less sure of my temper – and Alice’s casual use of the girl’s name made me lose it completely. I shook Esme off and ran forward, crashing straight into Jasper. He gripped my bare arms and at the contact his magical calm increased. I snarled again: “Knock it off.”“Good riddance, I say,” Rosalie said, exasperated. “Why are we still even talking about this?”I don’t know why you’re so angry, Jasper thought at me, bewildered at how close I was at enacting violence on him. We both knew it was a fight I would lose.“I need to talk to Edythe alone, everyone,” Alice said serenely, tossing Emmett his keys. “It’s a personal matter.”“It is not,” I argued. Nothing about Bella Swan was personal. She was an obstacle in my path that I had handled. She was nothing to me.Oh, but it is, Eddie, Alice said with relish, raising an eyebrow. “Jazz, let go of her.” He made no move to release me. “Oh, for God’s sake. It’s Edythe. Let her go.”Jasper’s hands parted from my skin. My emotions barreled back to me so suddenly I staggered back a step, shaking my head. I could only turn and direct myself into the trees that lined the drive. Alice made a sound of satisfaction.“Alright, I’ll take it from here, everyone,” she said, following me.“What is it about?” I heard Esme ask Emmett wonderingly.“No freakin’ clue, Es.”“Something incredibly dull,” Rosalie said. “They’re always being dull at one another and leaving me out of it.”Carlisle said nothing, but he had a suspicion that I terribly hoped was incorrect. I walked until their voices and minds faded out of range and the ambient forest sounds took over. It was dark as pitch when I stopped, having moved miles in only a few minutes.“Why? Why did you do that?” I asked. Alice’s pupils were at full dilation in the darkness, blacking out the gold ring of iris. She knew what I was asking – I knew why she had saved Bella, and I couldn’t begrudge her that. I would be a hypocrite if I did.But to see Bella’s future, Alice would have had to be looking.“I’ve been watching her the same way you have,” she said defensively, walking up an exposed tree root. “To see if she would talk about what you did or not. And she never was going to, by the way, but that’s not all I saw when I looked.” Even now, she was turning her thoughts into white noise, carefully holding back the horrible revelation for when it would have maximum impact. “Basically, Edythe, I’ve seen something…interesting.”I narrowed my eyes. “Like what?”I felt her gather her nerve. Whatever this was, she had been practicing her delivery. “It started with the crash,” she said.Her brain lit up like a slideshow. Memories of futures that had not happened – there was a multiplicity in Alice’s visions always, but these even more so because she had carefully committed them to her memory.First it was me saving Bella from the crash. Then me and Bella sitting in my car and…laughing. Bella and Alice together and laughing, arms around each other’s shoulders. All accompanied by Alice’s warm anticipation.I scoffed. “Just because one of those things happened – “The images switched. Now Bella was in my arms, or I was in hers, and she stepped up onto her tiptoes to press her mouth against mine.My anger had been cresting to new and exciting heights, but now it crashed completely and utterly. My lungs emptied themselves. I reeled.Alice pressed on relentlessly, watching me from her perch. A vision of me looking unmistakably happy, laying in a bed with Bella Swan, reading. Her hand on my thigh and mine around her shoulders. Then – hell of all hells – the two of us doing much more than reading. It was everything Alice had been hiding from me.“No, Alice. Stop.” I was begging now.Bella, her brown skin sparkling beneath the sun. Her silver eyes turned blood red.“Alice!” I yelled. “What are you doing?”“She’s going to be part of our family.” Alice whispered. “There’s no point in waiting.”“No point in – Alice I don’t even like this girl.” I shoved at a tree, sending it toppling over. This was Tanya all over again. “What is it about me that makes everyone want to pair me off? Maybe I like being alone!”
You saw the same things I did. Your anger is entirely irrational.
“No.” I stalked up to her, leaning down into her face. “I’m not gay, Alice. It’s not going to happen.”She looked up at me stubbornly, arms crossed. Another vision assaulted me – the one of Bella kissing me. The vision-Edythe kissed her back with alien passion. For a single moment, I allowed myself to imagine it. I had never kissed anyone, so it was odd. I sagged.“Do you understand how that makes me feel, Alice? What you’re telling me…it’s impossible.”“I love her,” Alice stated, an absolute truth. “I love her like a sister already. So what about me?”“I never said you couldn’t make human friends. Leave me out of it.”“She’s beautiful,” Alice said. This did unpleasant things to me. “She’s funny, she’s smart. I’m just asking you to give it a chance!”“’Give it a chance’? This isn’t friendship you’re proposing! You want me to – to change who I am!”“No.” I want you to give yourself a chance at happiness. A real, very possible chance.If I couldn’t see how completely serious she was, I wouldn’t have been able to calm myself down. Alice was always very certain of her futures, but this conviction wasn’t prejudicial to me – the future was never set in stone.“Are you very angry with me?”I shook my head. I needed to get away from her. She saw where I was going with a spark of joy.“You’ll tell them,” I predicted. No visions necessary. “You’ll tell them what you saw.”“This can be between us. It will be! I won’t tell.”Our family was going to be very curious. I doubted her ability to keep this secret any longer, now that she wasn’t keeping it from me.My feet took me where I needed to go without much thought. I had been by the Chief’s house before. He was a slow thinker, not really a threat. I knew where he lived, even if I didn’t know why exactly I was going there now.I took a long detour, heading deep into the woods to find some peace and quiet. By the time I arrived, two hearts beat solidly and slowly with sleep. I knew which was hers – it was a faster tempo, bracketed by soft exhalations.Scaling the wall was easy, but the window squeaked as I pushed it open. I paused, but the slow breathing remained steady.The room was stifling with her scent. I had not held my breath and my throat ached savagely for the lapse in judgement. Everything was shades of purple and blue, the generic decor of a sociable teenager. The teenager in question lay amidst a sea of blankets and dark hair. I watched her breathe and I listened to her heart, waiting for whatever Alice had seen to come true.Nothing happened, except my throat smoldered away.What I was doing was not acceptable by any means. I picked up a battered copy of Macbeth on the desk, letting it fall open on its own.“…Who could refrain, that had a heart to love, and in that heart   courage to make love known?”I flipped to the end of the play.“Out, out, brief candle! Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player that struts and frets his hour upon the stage and is heard no more. It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.”“Cold one.”The voice did not startle me, but the drawn breath preceding it had. I was already turned, facing her. Her heart had not changed its pattern – she was deeply asleep.I had never in my existence wished to hear another person’s thoughts so badly. “Cold ones,” she repeated. A line formed between her eyebrows. “Jacob…”Cold ones. I hadn’t heard that name in quite a while. Billy Black was still alive, wasn’t he? He had children, I knew. Jacob. Jacob Black. I remembered the beach trip Mike Newton had been thinking about. I knew that Bella had gone. I couldn’t for the life of me guess why those legends would have come up. Unless…“Who did you tell?” I whispered, quieter than her breathing. I was unable to move closer or farther away, some brief confusion settling in my chest. I was mixing Alice’s visions with reality – the meddling imp was getting in my head.Bella sighed in her sleep, and the sound was soft. She had survived yet another brush with death (or worse) and appeared unmarked by it. A singularly unlucky human with, if Alice had her way, only more danger ahead.___________________________
Bella
I had nightmares – horribly vivid nightmares of abandoned streets and large figures in the shadows watching me. It was entirely worse than the car crash. I snapped awake shaking and perspiring, my bedroom several degrees colder than it should have been.I remembered the men before I remembered Alice Cullen, and that lifted my mood by sheer depth of confusion.Give Edythe a chance…I shook my head, stomping to the bathroom and scrubbing my face raw. If I gave myself too much free time, I would start panicking again. My shopping bag caught my eyes on the floor next to my dresser. At least something had gone right last night. I would be traumatized and warm.I yanked each new article of clothing out of the plastic bag, letting it drop to the ground. Something hit my foot with a papery whisper.A white envelope. I picked it up, frowning. My name was written on the front in neat script. Hesitantly, I ripped it open, pulling out two tickets. Concert tickets.Had Alice slipped this in there? How could I have missed that? Though I looked, there was no more information to be had. The tickets were the only things in the envelope. I gave myself a minute to turn them over in my fingers. Next Saturday, Tacoma. The band was one of my favorites.I set them carefully on my desk, backing away slowly. Coffee. I needed coffee before dealing with that.The brief sunny weather had completely gone, but the dark clouds that seemed to threaten snow didn’t bother me as much as usual. I didn’t have to go to school, so let it snow. What bothered me was the absence of Charlie. His car was gone. He hadn’t mentioned working again this Saturday, but maybe he’d gotten called in. I considered texting him and asking, but decided against it.Instead, I made coffee and toasted a bagel and walked back up to my room, sipping out of my mug and contemplating the tickets. It occurred to me – and this could only be sheer coincidence – that the band the tickets were for was the same band as the song that had been playing in Edythe’s car the day of the blood typing.______________________ Edythe  “I just want to get close enough to hear someone,” I said. “She told them, Carlisle.”Carlisle shook his head again. “This is…speculation.”I walked further into his study. “If she told them, they would believe her.”“Come now,” he said, inclining his head. When was the last time you interacted with a Quileute? Generations have passed.It had been a long time. “Someone told her about the ‘cold one’ myth. Jacob.”The name rung a bell. Carlisle had heard of a Jacob – through Chief Swan, no less. He was Billy Black’s son. “If she did tell them, there’s nothing to be done. The treaty holds.”“Says you,” Jasper interjected from behind me. “Does their memory go back as far as ours?”“Moot.” Carlisle rounded his desk to lean back against it, arms crossed. “As far as I know, there are no…iterations of the shapeshifting gene at current. But it doesn’t mean we can renege on anything.”“But if there were,” I pressed, having realized, “then it would be Jacob Black. Wouldn’t it?”I thought – is she safe around him? I was horrified at myself. I pretended I hadn’t thought it.“As I understand it,” Carlisle said, “the gene is triggered by a vampiric presence. We’ve kept our distance.”Rosalie thought something. Regrettably, I agreed. “You might be right, Rose.”She said from the hall, “Well, I know that much.”“We’ve been gone for more than a generation,” I repeated for Carlisle’s benefit. “Maybe it is us, maybe we’re too close, even staying on this side of Forks.”Rosalie entered the study, Emmett slouching behind her. “Could be strays, too, though,” he amended. The thought excited him.“Fallacy,” Carlisle said to me. “You don’t know that they did anything but tell her a story. It would be legend to Jacob Black, he’s a child.”Black, Rosalie thought. “Like, Ephraim?” She had heard the stories, and shuddered.“I’m just proposing that I go over there,” I repeated. The conversation was getting away from me. “I won’t cross the boundary, but I have enough range to hear anyone near the border. The pack mind was unique. I’d know it in an instant if I heard it again.”Carlisle gave me a look. I’m not sure of your reasoning, Edythe.I quailed, infuriated. How dare he!“What?” Rosalie snapped, watching my face. I schooled my expression.“The Quileutes have known about us for the past hundred years,” Carlisle said. “It doesn’t matter if Bella Swan has talked to them, and we certainly shouldn’t go sniffing at the border of their land.” He directed his next words at my face. “I don’t advise it. Perhaps you should ask Bella directly.”“Oh, my God,” I said, without meaning to. Embarrassed at the outburst, I left the room. The absolute last thing I wanted, in the midst of the hell Alice had concocted for me, was Carlisle’s advice.___________________________  
Bella
I looked for the silver Volvo in the parking lot at school Monday morning, but didn’t see it. I didn’t even know what I would do if I did see it.Eric and Jessica walked with me to first period, joyfully oblivious to my inability to focus. I hadn’t mentioned anything to Jessica or Angela about Friday night. It was too weird. I wouldn’t have been able to explain to them what I couldn’t even explain to myself.I turned the details over in my mind, stuck in the puzzle that was the Cullens. My leg twitched underneath me during English. I tapped my fingers on the desk until Jessica snapped at me to cut it out. By the time lunch arrived I felt sick.They were all there. Edythe’s back was to me.“I’ll be right back,” I told my friends. “I have to go…talk to someone.”I stood up before they asked me who. Over the weekend I had puzzled over the concert tickets and come to what I thought was the only real conclusion: Alice Cullen wanted me to use them. It’s not like I had her phone number, or knew how to get it. None of the Cullens seemed to have a social media presence. Charlie might have known their address, but, get real.Alice had given them to me, and she had told me I should be friends with Edythe Cullen.As I approached the Cullens’ lunch table, Alice looked up at me and grinned ear-to-ear. The two boys looked at me, and then at Edythe, eyes big.I felt a lot of people in the lunchroom looking at me. “Uh…hey!”“Hey!” Said the big one – Emmett.As one, Edythe and the blonde sister turned to look at me. The blonde one gave me a scowling once-over – ouch. Edythe gave me nothing. “Can I help you?” She asked, like I was a wandering panhandler. Like we were complete strangers. Behind her, Alice nodded at me encouragingly, and I was vaguely impressed that I had guessed her weird game right.“I need to talk to you,” I said. “Um. Could we go outside?”Edythe heaved a sigh and stood, heading past me to the doors. I followed, glancing at Alice one last time. She smiled at me with petite, angelic features. I couldn’t reconcile her appearance with the story Jacob had told me. Was she some sort of cannibal? An inhuman monster?The nearest doors led to the walkway to the music building. The edge of the overhang dripped with rain. There had been a warm snap, but now the temperature seemed to be dropping again. Edythe stopped at the edge of the blacktop and leaned against the brick with her arms crossed, glaring at me.“What is it?” She asked.“I, uh.” I took a deep breath. Why did I feel like this? It felt like more than nervousness. I realized I couldn’t open my mouth and took the envelope from my new coat’s pocket and thrust it at her. At the very least, my hand didn’t shake.Edythe pulled it from me with almost aggressive speed. She looked at my name on the front and blinked. Then she removed the tickets. It didn’t look like she was reading them so much as glaring until they made sense to her.The rain picked up. “Well?” I asked.“What? You don’t want these?”Was it not clear what was happening? I didn’t think I would have to explain it in so many words. “Your sister gave these to me. I saw her Friday – Friday night.”“I know that,” Edythe said shortly. “Why are you giving them to me?”“I was asking you to go with me,” I said slowly, blushing. She looked at the tickets again, mouth going taut.“Why?”I sighed. Because your freak of a sister wants us to be friends? Because if we’re stuck in a car together maybe you’ll answer some of my questions? “That’s why she gave them to me. Isn’t it?”She appeared to think about it, then nodded.“What if,” I offered, “what if we go to this concert, and that’s that?”Edythe’s eyes went unfocused, like she was thinking of something else. “What do you mean?”“I won’t bother you anymore. If you answer my questions.”“It’s not going to work,” Edythe hissed.“…what?”She blinked and looked at me. “Sorry. You were saying…I answer your questions. One night.”“Yeah. Do you – would you…?”“I don’t think I have much choice,” Edythe said. “Fine. I’ll go with you.”She sounded none too happy about it, either. “It wasn’t my idea,” I felt the need to say.“Yeah.” Edythe pushed off of the wall and went back into the cafeteria without me. I stewed in a sudden burst of anger that only Edythe Cullen seemed able to produce in me.I didn’t get her out of my head for the whole week, no thanks to Jessica’s constant pestering about why I was talking to a Cullen. My routine was interrupted Wednesday afternoon, when I got home to find a black van parked in my spot, next to Charlie’s cruiser. I had a pretty good idea of who it would be.“Bells!” Charlie called as soon as I walked in. He grabbed me out of the foyer and pulled me to the kitchen, visibly excited. “Here she is, Billy! What did I tell ya?”Billy, as I already knew, was in a wheelchair. Everything else was exactly what I remembered – long dark hair, peppered with gray, and eyes that had seen the whole world. “Bella!” He said, smiling with such warmth I forgot to be nervous. “My goodness. Where does the time go?”Jacob grinned at me, lounging in the chair by the window.“Wow,” I said. “Hi! How are you guys?”“Oh, same old,” Billy said in his incredibly deep voice. “How’s that truck doing?”“It’s great,” I said, tripping over my words. “I really meant to thank you before now. I’m – it’s been really great. I love it.”“She’s taking it up to Seattle this weekend,” Charlie said, turning to something in the microwave. It smelled like fish fry. “That’ll be as good a test as any.”“Oh, Dad,” I said. I hadn’t told him yet. “Actually, it’s just Tacoma, now. I got…invited to a concert.”“A concert?” Charlie asked, like he had never heard of one. “With who?”It was clear that he thought…well, he probably would assume a boy had invited me. He’d asked me about boys twice already. Jacob, too, raised an eyebrow. I sighed, thinking it was better to set the record straight than let Jacob think I was going on a date with Mike. “Edythe Cullen.”“Well, that’s great, Bells. She driving, then?” He asked, obviously not as confident in my car as he had told Billy.I just nodded, because Billy’s expression had changed. He was looking at me with something like…fear? No, I thought, that was ridiculous. Charlie pulled the plate from the microwave with a clatter, and the look was gone. “Would you look at the time? Billy, we’re gonna miss tip-off. Bells, Jake, come watch!” He strode off to the living room, Billy wheeling right behind him wordlessly.I relaxed, sinking into the chair across from Jacob. “I don’t like sports,” I said. “Did you see that?”He leaned over the table at me, slumping down onto his arms like a lazy dog. “See what?”“Your dad. Billy.”He made a bobbing motion with his head. “I told you the story.”For some reason, I had not really believed it – that the Quileutes actually had a problem with the Cullens. “Really?” I asked Jacob, leaning forward. “He really believes it?”Jacob nodded, squinting apologetically. “He won’t say anything in front of Charlie, though. But if he gets you alone you might get an earful.”“Why? What about Charlie?”“Um, they got into a big fight over it when the new doctor was hired. Some of the res elders, uh, protested.”“They’re just teenagers,” I said. Jacob cocked his head at me. “Sorry, it’s just…odd.”He shrugged, not at all worried. “So, you were supposed to come see me, remember?”I pushed all the weirdness to the back of my mind. Guilt took its place. “I’m sorry! Things have been really crazy.”“Like how?”I blanked, unable to tell him anything and unable to think of a lie. I didn’t want to lie. Jacob gave me one of those grins again. “That bad, huh?” He leaned forward on his elbows. “Want to go for a drive?”If he was literally any other boy I had met so far, I would have looked for some kind of ulterior motive. “The truck?”He stuck his head into the living room. “Gonna take the truck for a spin with Bella.”“You guys don’t want to watch the game?” Charlie asked. Jacob glanced at me and I made a cutting motion over my neck with one hand.When we stepped out into the rain, Jacob held out his hand. I realized he wanted my keys. Again, I wouldn’t have allowed it from anyone other than him. He’d built the Thing, after all. I crawled up into the passenger side of the bench and drew my feet up. Our breath misted onto the windshield as he started the car with a roar.“You wouldn’t know that a van hit it,” I said.“A what hit what?”“A van,” I said. His eyes got big. “Oh, I can’t believe Charlie wouldn’t tell Billy about that. I almost died!”“Whoa,” Jacob said. “You were in a wreck?”I gave him the abridged version, sans Edythe.“Holy fucking shit!” He exclaimed, turning south. The sky was gray and dark amid the tree-lined corridor of road. “I’m sure Charlie did tell Billy, and Billy just didn’t mention it to me. They were together all day Saturday.”I sighed at that. I’d assumed Charlie had been at work all day, until he’d come home with a cooler full of fish. I couldn’t quite blame him for not inviting me, but it stung.“So, aside from that shit,” Jacob took a turn sharply, gunning the gas on a long road. “How’s school and stuff? You homesick yet?”I wasn’t homesick. I hadn’t had the time to be homesick, and, besides, my home didn’t exist anymore. It had moved to Jacksonville. “School is fine.”“Nah,” Jacob said, settling back with one hand on the wheel. “You don’t have to do that.”“Do what?”“We don’t have to make small talk.” He glanced over with a smile. “Billy has photographs of us napping together. I braided your hair!”“Jake, we were five. I haven’t seen you in…a decade!”This obviously troubled him. He did something with his mouth I could only define as a pout. “So Charlie never talks about me, I take it?”“Well –” Charlie had told me about the car accident, when Jacob had lost his mother about five years back, “– some.”“He talks about you constantly. I guess I feel like I know you.”“He – he does?”“Hell yes. I know everything about you. Try me.”“What’s my favorite color?”“Red,” Jacob said immediately. I hadn’t had an answer ready. “Charlie says you always pick red things to eat.”I thought this was complete bull. “Yup,” I said. “You know everything about me.”“Told you so.” He winked.“Well,” I laughed, feeling oddly relieved suddenly. “No small talk, then. Since I came back to Forks, I have…oh, God. I have collected suitors.”“What the fuck does that mean?”Because it was the most interesting thing that had happened to me that wasn’t impossible to explain (aside from the mystery of why these guys liked me in the first place), I told him about the girl’s choice dance and the surrounding humiliation.“That’s a new level of game,” Jacob commented in regard to Tyler asking me out. “Almost kill a girl then ask her out. I’m assuming he looks like Jason Momoa or some shit. Only way that would work. Hey – do you smoke?”I blinked. “Huh? No?”“Do you mind if I?” He nodded to the window. It was still raining, but in soft disparate patters.I sat up a bit, curious. “Won’t it make my truck smell?”He smirked at me. “It already smells, doesn’t it?”I thought he was implying something about my car hygiene. Then he pulled something from his jacket and held it up to my face. A pack of cigarettes, but they didn’t smell like how I expected. “Menthols,” I read, taking another sniff. It was a familiar, unique scent that I had noticed the first time I got into the Thing. “You dirty dog,” I said.“I know. Bad habit,” he said, putting one in his mouth and lighting it. I declined. He had to slow down as rolling down the window produced a freezing cold draft. “Billy can’t get out to the garage without help. Working on stuff out there is the only time I can get away.”“This started after we were five,” I guessed. This made him laugh and I was proud.“Last year. Living with Billy is…well.”I nodded as if I understood, watching the smoke trail from his nostrils as he talked, the cigarette tucked in his fingers, waving carelessly. He was younger than me, but looked older. There was no childlike roundness to his face like most guys my age. Actually, it looked like he had been working out.“So, I thought you and that Cullen chick weren’t cool at all. Now you’re going to a concert together?” He asked suddenly.“Oh.” I shrank down. “It’s a whole thing.” I almost said that it hadn’t been Edythe at all, and that her sister had set us up, but saying it that way would make it sound like a date. “I…was invited…but we aren’t friends or anything.”“Huh,” Jacob said.“Let’s talk about you.” (“Uh-oh,” Jacob said) “What are your friends like?”“Just a buncha dudes.”“No girlfriends?” I asked.“Uh,” he laughed. “No friends that are girls, and definitely no girlfriends.”“Why definitely?” I was aware that it sounded like flirtation. I hoped Jacob didn’t take it that way.“Aw, come on,” he complained, taking a drag. “You attract guys like flies. It’s kinda tough out here for the rest of us.”“Ah. Right. I forget about you mortals.”The sun lowered, turning down the saturation in the gray sky and by comparison the vegetation a much brighter green. It was gorgeous. Nothing like Phoenix.Jacob started telling me a little about his friends, Quil and Embry and Jared, but I got the sense it was a sore subject. Nothing in his voice portrayed that, but I felt like his stories were being edited. A grimace slipped through her and there around mentions of “this other guy who used to hang out with us”.Maybe he had an Edythe, too. Someone he couldn’t possibly understand.As the sun lowered over the horizon, the light faded and it felt like the cab of my truck was the only thing in the world. Jacob was easily my favorite person in Forks. Everything was so easy, so comfortable, like it had never been with my Phoenix friends. I was disappointed when Billy phoned that it was time to leave.“He doesn’t know you smoke?” I guessed as Jacob hastily hid the paraphernalia in his pockets and steered us toward the house.“And he can never know,” Jacob grimaced. “I’d never hear the end of it.”“Charlie would kill me, I think. I’m an accomplice now, you know.”“Eh, there’s not much Billy can do. He relies on me too much.”“Sounds like you’ve thought about this a lot.”He chuckled. “Gotta keep one step ahead of the enemy, Bella. That’s your first lesson.”

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Bella  I had only ever been to one concert. It was with Renée, in California, and the band had been around for decades before I was even born. I was the youngest audience member there by about twenty years. I had probably worn a graphic tee and shorts. This concert was very different, for many reasons. One, the band was one of my favorites. Two, the audience would be around my age, maybe even (yikes) younger. Three, I was not going with my mother. I was going with someone my own age. Kind of.For some reason, I wanted to impress Edythe. This urge didn’t come from a logical place – I knew there was nothing I could do to get a reaction from her. I wanted to.After looking desperately through the bag of summer clothes I thought I would never wear again, I winnowed out a few possibilities. Two of them were too small or I didn’t have the right bra for it. The third was a dark orange top I had been dared to buy on a rare outing with my Phoenix friends. It had long sleeves and tied in the front. I turned this way and that in the mirror, wondering how precarious the tie would be when faced with the weight of my chest. It seemed fine, and was passably trendy, so I kept it.My hair fought me every step of the way, so after a spray and a tease I left it to do its own thing. Then, on a ‘what would Jessica do’ whim, I dug for what little makeup I owned and applied some glittery silver to my lower lids. I chose a pair of wedged ankle boots. They gave me a bit of height – which I would need, at a concert – without the added risk of tripping me. Well, less of a risk.I was dressed too early. There was nothing to do but pace the length of my room, biting a nail. It had occurred to me that Edythe might just not show up. She had barely spoken to me that week, and even then only to talk in pinched sentences about the lesson at hand. No love lost there. I was sure Alice – wherever she was – was thrilled.At exactly four o’clock – earlier than the time we had agreed on yesterday in class – the doorbell rang. I went to my bedroom door and listened closely.“Edythe Cullen!” Charlie said, like he was surprised to see her. I was certain he had canceled any fishing plans to be here and meet her properly. “Come on in. I was just talking to your father this morning.”There was a pause wherein Edythe may have answered. I only caught the faintest murmur.“Headed out to Tacoma, huh?” Another muttered response. I wondered if Edythe was hating this. Charlie said: “It’s really nice of you to take Bella out. Her mother and I always say she doesn’t go out enough with people her own age – “I snatched my purse and hurried down the steps, seriously regretting letting Charlie talk to her at all.“Hi,” I said, barreling into the foyer to stop Charlie from breaking out the baby photos. “Hey.”Edythe Cullen looked like a celebrity at McDonalds. She did not fit in Charlie’s house – not even in her basic windbreaker. She smiled at me, which made me stop cold.“We’d better get going,” she said. Her voice was pitched up, feminine, friendly. I realized with relief that the smile had not been real – she was doing this for Charlie’s benefit. “It’s a long drive.”“Don’t let me hold you up,” he said, stepping back toward the living room. He was putting on a little bit of a front, as well, I noticed. “Sure you don’t need a jacket, Bells?”“I’ll be fine,” I said, trying to crowd Edythe toward the door without appearing to do so.“It’s quite cold,” she said, not moving at all, with the barest twitch of an eyebrow. They were both probably right, but I refused to give in. Also, I was currently embroiled in a nervous sweat. The thought of adding a layer chafed.“I won’t be cold,” I said.Charlie didn’t comment on the obvious lie. “Well, lock up when you get in, Bells. Have fun, girls!”“Thank you, Chief Swan,” Edythe said, opening the front door for me. I realized my mistake as a glacial wind hit me. The forecast had said sixty!I stepped onto the porch and locked the door behind Edythe. Her face had returned to utter impassivity as we walked to her car.The concert didn’t start until seven, and it was only a two-ish hour drive to Tacoma. Two hours with Edythe Cullen. Alone. “We’re going to be early,” I said.She backed out of the drive and turned East. “You’ll be hungry.”The way my stomach was starting to churn, I really doubted that. There was a long silence as Edythe drove toward the interstate. Music played very softly on the stereo. I had thought hard about how I would start. It would be easy to ask the obvious – why do you hate me? But I was sure I wouldn’t like the answer.I opened my mouth.“Why did you move here?” Edythe asked me suddenly.“I already – my dad – ““Your dad,” she said, as though in agreement. “But why now? You’re almost finished with high school.”“I –” I turned to the window, watching trees fly by. The engine of Edythe’s car was a quiet purr in comparison to Thing. “Why do you want to know? It’s boring.”“That’s the agreement.”“The agreement was that you answer my questions,” I pointed out.“I’ve added an addendum,” she said flatly. “Ask away.”“Why does your sister think we should be friends?”Edythe’s face went, if possible, more stonelike. I tried not to take it personally that even the suggestion made her upset. “That’s what you wanted to ask?”“You can’t answer it?”“Interpreting Alice is like interpreting the moon,” Edythe said. “Ill-advised and mainly guesswork.”“Why was she in Port Angeles?”Edythe nodded a little. “She knew what was going to happen to you.”I had tried not to think about that night, despite the nightmares, but the reminder made me shiver nonetheless. “You mean she saw me and… and those men. In the street.”“Not exactly.” Edythe heaved an annoyed sigh. “I mean she sees things. Things that will – might – happen.”“Are you telling me that she’s psychic?”Edythe nodded very seriously. “Are you going to make fun of me all night?” I asked tightly. “If you are, maybe we should just call it off.”“Maybe we should,” she said. “But I’m not making fun of you. That was my honest answer.”“Alice Cullen is psychic,” I said again. “And she thinks we should be friends because she ‘saw the future’?”Edythe frowned at my finger quotes. “Something like that.”“And you disagree.”Edythe said, quieter, “Something like that.”I was quiet until she merged onto the interstate. A blue minivan merged to get out of our way. She sped past. “You know, I don’t find you very pleasant, either.”“That doesn’t bother me nearly as much as it bothers you.” Edythe smiled – and this smile was different than before. It was lopsided and abrupt and perfect. I lost my seething anger like sand through fingers. “But I’m glad we understand each other. What is your mother like?”Her questions made no sense, but they were simple. “My mother is…the life of the party.”“Do you miss her?”It was my turn to ask, and I resented Edythe Cullen for – well, everything, so I pulled out a heavy. “Are you human?”Her eyes widened briefly. Bingo.“Why would you ask that?” She questioned, and her tone was sharp.I heard Jacob’s voice in my head, whispering about cold ones, and I saw Billy’s eyes in my kitchen, afraid at just the mention of a Cullen. “You have super strength, or something. Suppose I’m willing to believe that your sister can see the future,” – which I was not – “You’re fast. Your eyes change color. Your skin is…cold.”“You have not touched my skin,” Edythe said, which seemed an odd rebuttal.I heard Jacob again. It warped their existence. Made them immortal.“And my eyes?”“The first day we…met, your eyes were black. Dark brown, or black. And every day since, they’ve been gold.”Edythe looked at me again, sizing me up. I wrung my hands nervously. “It’s my diet,” she said. “Do you miss your mother?”The question didn’t come fast enough to offset the shock of hearing her say that. The diet! Another one of my questions.“Of course I do,” I said. “Your diet – ““Swan,” Edythe said slowly, cutting me off. “I find your answers lacking.”She had, of course, not even answered my question about being human or not. Not directly. “I miss her a lot,” I snapped. “She was my best friend. Are you human?”Edythe was silent. Yet another car swerved to avoid us. That was the third. My eyes drifted to the speedometer.“Oh my God!” I shrieked.Edythe tensed in response. “What?”“You’re going a hundred and ten! Are you trying to kill us?” The trees on either side of the road blurred into a green wall of death. I gripped the handle at the top of the door.“Calm down,” she said, relaxing slightly. We slowed down a little, but the speedometer hovered over the one-hundred mark. “I’ve never even gotten a ticket.”“I don’t see how that’s possible,” I grumbled, not relaxing my grip on the handle.“Built-in radar.” She tapped her temple.“Huh?”Her hand dropped; face twisted into a scowl. “This is how I always drive.”“I was raised to abide by traffic laws.”She said something under her breath and the car slowed to eighty-five. I could breathe again.“I hate going slow,” she said.“This is slow?”“Enough,” she said, with finality. Her mood was so mercurial I was starting to wonder if there was just something wrong with me. Was it rude to question someone’s humanity? Maybe there was some sort of inter-species etiquette I had missed out on. Perhaps Jacob had another legend that would help in a situation like this.“It sounds like you have a new theory,” she said, voice less hard. “Gave up on the radioactive spiders?”Apprehension stilled my tongue. It was one thing to think what I was thinking, one thing to be certain of it, and another thing entirely to say it out loud. If Edythe said exactly the right thing, would she be able to convince me I was wrong? I was worried my reality was getting subjective.Edythe sighed impatiently, and when I looked over, she was watching me, her face all composed again. “What if you get upset?” I asked.Emotion flickered around her mouth. “I think I can handle it.”“I was at a beach last week. First Beach. Have you been there?” She gave the tiniest shake of her head. I made sure my voice was steady as I continued, “I ran into an old – a family friend. He was telling me about some legends. And there was one…”“Go on.” Her wan smile was forced.“It was about cannibals.” The word fell awkwardly from my lips. I thought I saw her knuckles tighten convulsively on the wheel, but it was hard to look away from her face. Jacob said they didn’t have blood – but Edythe had a pink undertone to her skin. Her lips were a natural, flushed red. I wondered if she was as cold as Alice.“Cannibals,” she repeated. The tone was teasing, but something about it was as strained as her smile. “And you immediately thought of me?”“No. He mentioned your family.” Her face fell into the mask again, and I was abruptly worried about protecting Jacob. “It’s not like he even believed what he was telling me – it was all a story. I convinced him.”“Why?”“I…was curious about you. For obvious reasons.”“Obvious.” She shook her head. “So you think I’m a cannibal?”I shook my head slowly. “No…”“Spit it out.”“He said –” I paused, again worried about Jacob. “The story said something about a treaty. The cannibals swore they would never kill a human.”I somehow felt like I was getting closer – like the cracks in her composure were getting bigger. “I was just wondering how a cannibal is still a cannibal if they don’t eat people.”The pause that followed was long, so long it scared me a little.“Maybe cannibal isn’t the right word,” she said. Her tone made me shiver.“Are you going to hurt me?” It hadn’t occurred to me to ask before then. Another etiquette rule missed. I was terrible at this.Edythe took another deep breath, wincing. “I’m not. If I was going to do anything to you, I would have.” She glanced over and my expression gave her pause. “I mean it. Alice would never forgive me. We at least have to make it to the concert.”“What do you…eat?”The car sped up again, quiet engine humming louder as the speedometer twitched back toward triple digits. Edythe said, “The same as anyone. Animals. Specifically…animal blood.”Blood. I felt my entire body still in response, down to my toes. My theory wasn’t a theory, then.“Why did you say ‘was’?” Edythe asked, after a tense silence. She sounded tense. “You said your mother was your best friend. Why?”I pictured my mother’s face. It was better to talk about this, instead of the other thing, because if we talked about the other thing I would start screaming. I laughed without meaning to, and I answered her completely. “Because she raised me, not Ch- not my dad. Mostly. They shared custody, but I lived with her. It was mostly just the two of us, until she met Phil. That was when I was…twelve or something. They got married two years ago.” I remembered Renée being very careful with dating, even if I didn’t remember expressing any problems with it. I liked Phil.“Things were just…different after that,” I said. Renée could get caught up in things, and she loved Phil so much she couldn’t help it. I saw less and less of her at the beginning of high school. We had been closer than a lot of teenage girls and their mothers, I knew, and maybe it should have been natural to spend less time together. “I decided I should…y’know. Come and fix things with my dad.”I saw Edythe look at me quickly. I didn’t dare believe she had found any of that interesting. She said: “Your turn.”“I need a break,” I said. My breath was shaking.She switched tact effortlessly, almost considerately, speaking as though nothing was amiss between us. “I only go to concerts occasionally. Alice knew I would want to go to this one before she bought the tickets.”I remembered about the concert suddenly. I’d forgotten our thinly veiled parlay had a purpose. “You like this band?”She nodded. “I do.”I looked through my window for a moment.“Do you listen to a lot of music?” She asked, surprising me.And it went like that. Somehow, the conversation was civil for the rest of the trip, and I gradually recovered from my initial shock. It wasn’t as horrible as I expected. It probably wasn’t even as bad as the dance would have been. Edythe was slightly less terrible to me when the conversation was about normal stuff. I hadn’t expected we would have so much – or anything – in common, but we had the same taste in music. We also, oddly enough, had read a good number of the same classics. We argued over the best adaptation of Pride and Prejudice for a good while: I preferred the Kiera Knightly movie, and she was adamant that it was best performed on stage.I was a little shocked when we arrived in Tacoma a full half-hour early. Surely Edythe wasn’t driving that fast.My stomach grumbled as we passed a McDonald’s. I pointed it out, but Edythe shook her head.“I’d prefer somewhere that’s passed a health exam,” she muttered, whipping the car into the lot of a much nicer place without seeming to look for it. I guessed she had been here before.To my dismay, it had gotten colder outside. I followed close behind Edythe’s tall form, hoping to block the wind that was tearing at my face and midriff. Thankfully, it was warm inside, and no one looked at me funny when the hostess led us to our table. Probably because they were all staring at Edythe. Even in a zipped-up jacket, she had a tangible effect.They sat us in the back corner, which should have made it harder for people to stare, but really just had them craning their necks to murmur about us. Well, not us. I was surprised – Forks high did not act this way about the Cullens. They must have had time to adjust. These poor diners were starstruck.I looked at the menu. Edythe didn’t touch hers, just looked at me. “People like the cheeseburger the best,” she said.“Have you been here before?”“No.” She leaned forward on her elbow, clearly enjoying my confusion. I busied myself in my menu, stomach complaining. A tall blonde guy appeared at our booth seconds later, before I was ready.“I’m Adam,” he said. “I’ll be your server tonight. Can I get you something to drink?” He stood at an angle, talking only to Edythe. She waved a hand in my direction.“Coke,” I said, when he grudgingly looked at me.“Two cokes,” she amended.“I’ll be right back with that.”I rolled my eyes as he walked off. Edythe continued to look at me, tilting her head to the side. “Still your turn.”I nodded, reminding myself that this was my only chance for answers. “Does the rest of your family…see the future?”She chewed the inside of her cheek. The server reappeared – we weren’t far from the drink fountains – and set down our drinks. He turned his back on me again to look at Edythe. “Are you ready to order?”She didn’t even glance up, eyes still locked on mine. “Swan?”The server turned unwillingly toward me.“Cheeseburger and fries,” I said, passing the menus over. “Thanks.”“And you?” He looked at Edythe again.“Nothing for me,” she said evenly. He walked away disappointed, and Edythe finally broke eye contact, looking instead at the other patrons.“My family…” she mused. “The answer is no, they don’t all see the future. Just Alice.”“Okay…”“Jasper intuits and manipulates the emotional states of others,” she said next.“What – does that mean?”“It’s precisely as it sounds.”I suppressed a shiver. “How?”Whatever my expression was seemed to disappoint her. “Are you going to start running soon? I don’t want to waste my time.”“Didn’t Alice tell you what I’d do?” I tried for bravado, but my voice wavered ever so slightly. She exhaled a laugh, shaking her head. “Why are you telling me this?”“We have an agreement,” she said, almost sadly. “I am as good as my word.”I took a fortifying sip of coke. “So your…thing…is super strength?”She shook her head slowly. “The strength – and the speed, for that matter – comes with the territory.” She leaned forward, raising an eyebrow. “I can read minds.”This, more so than anything else in the afternoon, threw me. This, more than anything else, I was sure was a lie. I threw my hands up in defeat. “Okay, what am I thinking right now?”She rocked back away from me, crossing her arms. Something tightened in her face that I hadn’t noticed until then was relaxed. “That’s the problem with you, Swan. I can’t hear you at all.”“That’s convenient.”“Quite the opposite.” She looked kind of up, suddenly, as though listening for something. “Our lovely waiter Adam is about to come back. He’ll ask me again if I want food. He hates when women feel like they can’t eat.” She seemed to process the thought after she had spoken it. “Some minds are better than others,” she added.The waiter rounded the corner in my periphery as she was talking. He set my burger in front of me – it looked amazing – then turned to Edythe. “Did you change your mind?” he asked Edythe. “Isn’t there anything I can get you? We have a special on the catfish.”“No,” she said. He didn’t try again.“That doesn’t prove anything,” I said, starting on my fries. Edythe ignored me.“I usually understand people pretty quickly. Thoughts are surface level, but motivation and desire don’t lie too far below. They are the pikes that wave the banners.”I nodded, not understanding at all. Who even talked like that?“I suppose I’ve grown too used to that,” she said, “because without it, I don’t understand you at all. Everything you do confuses me.”“I confuse you?” A few people turned to look at my outburst, and she smiled.“Well, yes. Like when you confronted me at the hospital, in front of Carlisle. You kept quiet to everyone but my father. Did you know the truth? Were you biding your time? Laughable, now, I know.”I bit into the burger, self-conscious to be the only one at the table eating. Edythe was calling me laughable, too, which didn’t make me feel better.“I listened the minds of everyone around you at school and got nothing. Well, nothing aside from your plight as Miss Popular…”“My what?”“The dance. You turned down three people.” She put her elbows on the table. “I don’t know why you did that, either.”“Um,” I said, “how did you know I turned down three people?” I couldn’t imagine there had been so much gossip about me that Edythe had heard.She blinked at me and smiled just a little. “You really don’t believe I can read minds.” I shook my head. “That’s alright. I didn’t enjoy listening to all of it. I…had to. I wanted to figure you out.”Her saying that, looking at me with those ridiculous eyes, sent a sensation through my chest I couldn’t identify. I was, suddenly, not so hungry. “Is that why you’re here now?”“No,” she said, eyebrows furrowing. “My sister is, if nothing else, a very determined person. Her abilities make trouble as often as they help. She’s made this…complicated.”“How so?”Edythe thought this over for a few seconds, eyebrows betraying some irritation. Then she said, quite fast, “She had been guarding her thoughts from me – she’s good at that – and I didn’t pry because I was – distracted. I didn’t know she was going to do…this.” She spread her hands. “Alice sees the future as fact, and it can be hard for those living in the present to – accept it. Make sense?” Without waiting for an answer, she continued, “I didn’t see the tickets coming, until you brought them to me.”She exhaled, looked at me, and then said, “I never said how glad I am she got to you in time.”The shift in tone was troubling. I knew what that was referring to – Port Angeles. I sat up straighter. I did not want her to be earnest about this. “Oh, uh – ““Don’t take that as a compliment. I saw what would have happened to you.” She grimaced and her shoulders slumped. “I’m not good at this.”“At what?” I asked. I’d never heard her talk so much at once.“Talking. Without the context of someone’s thoughts. I can’t hear what you’re thinking, so I just ramble on trying to anticipate what you’ll say next, which never gives you a chance to respond, and, of course, a response is the only thing that will give me any insight into your head.” Her jaw clenched.“Usually I’m the one rambling,” I offered meekly. Her eyes snapped to mine (when had they looked away?) and she cocked her head to one side. “I think it’s your turn now.”“Yes. I want to know about the friends you had at your old school.”It was an odd, useless, patently exhausting question. I took another bite of food, thinking it over. “What about them?”“How many?”“There – it was sort of a group.” Honors track kids who had been shunted into the same classrooms since middle school. “Maybe seven in all. Then I was working at a supermarket this summer, and I guess I made some friends there, too.”They had all mourned my moving North, or at least appeared to. I hadn’t been very close to any one girl since the beginning of high school – a little bit of a friend breakup, actually – and hadn’t mourned it much myself.“Anyone important?” Edythe asked, almost mirroring my train of thought. I wondered – frantically – if she could hear my mind. Telling me otherwise would only have me lowering my guard.Her face didn’t change at all – not a flicker – as I thought this. I thought: I’ve killed several men in cold blood and didn’t get so much as a blink. “Not really,” I admitted. “I just text a few of them, that’s it.”“You’re not on social media,” Edythe said.I felt that escaped-moth fluttering in my stomach again. “Neither are you.”She breathed a laugh, and I felt it on my face. The smell again! I realized abruptly that we had been leaning toward each other over the table. I could see her realize it, too. She sat back and looked away with a frown.“You should eat,” she said. I turned back to my half-full plate. She pushed her full drink against my empty glass. “Your turn.”“Okay,” I said, dipping a fry in ketchup. “This is probably... the most important question I’ll ask.”I was more comfortable now, inexplicably, and wagged my eyebrows a bit at her. The very corners of her mouth tipped into a crooked, reserved smile.“You must know what people say about you at school.”“I get the gist of it.”“I mean – your family. Your – siblings.”Her eyebrows shot up. “What do they say about us, Swan?”So she definitely knew. “Is it true?”She cast around with her eyes, tilting her chin up. “What if I told you that not one of us are biologically related, and that appearing as a traditional family unit is just what’s most convenient to us?”“It would be a hell of a lot better than the alternative,” I said, relaxing a smidge more. Those rumors had really freaked me out. I wasn’t even sure if the – other thing – was more upsetting to me or not. “I mean…you call Alice your sister…”“She is my sister, in every way that it matters. And in every way that matters, Carlisle is my father. Emmett and Jasper and Rosalie, also my siblings. They just…wouldn’t refer to each other that way. Perhaps.”“Does that mean you’re the only one who’s not…”“I’m the seventh wheel, yes,” she said, smile long faded. “Eternally so.”Fluttering again. I pushed my plate toward the end of the table and dug in my purse for a tin of Altoids. “Want one?” I questioned, holding it up. Edythe’s eyes shot between me and it for a long moment, and I realized I had issued a challenge on accident.She stuck out her hand. I dropped a mint into it and she lifted it to her mouth. The action wasn’t quite casual. ________________________We parked across the street from the Tacoma dome. The structure was gigantic, dwarfed only by Mount Rainier looming high above. Both were white-capped and lit up in the night, the dome by electricity, the mountain with starlight. I stared up at it as we walked, shuddering violently in the arctic night.“Just take this,” Edythe muttered. She unzipped her jacket. “I can’t watch you shiver all night.”I ignored her despairing tone. My mouth was probably hanging open.“Alice made me wear it,” Edythe said, voice going strained. “Here.”I took the jacket. I put my arms in the sleeves. There was no residual warmth that another body should have left on the inside. The jacket was as cold as if it had been sitting on a park bench all afternoon. It smelled very good.Underneath it, Edythe had been wearing a mesh top. It swayed to her waist, showing a good amount of pale skin and muscle. Her pants were black and high-waisted, and she wore a black bra thing beneath the shirt. I didn’t bother asking her if she would get cold.She produced the tickets at the barriers. The guard just didn’t swipe her with a metal detector. He only looked at her slack-jawed and forced me to stop for a check. I tried to keep up as Edythe strode through the crowd. It parted for her so easily. Hundreds of people milled around in the atriums, filling every space. Vendors called out, advertising beer and cotton candy. It was all I could do not to lose sight of the shiny copper head in front of me. A lot of people – guys and girls– cast interested or even alarmed looks at Edythe. I tried not to be one of them.We finally arrived at an arch which led to the stadium’s lowest ring of seats. I hadn’t looked at the seat numbers. If she left me I would be completely lost. “How much?” I asked, almost running to keep up with her as we descended the steps. It looked like Edythe might be heading for the floor section. “How much did she spend?”Edythe just barely turned her head. “When it comes to bothering other people, money is no object to Alice.”I was forced to crowd behind her as a group of women passed by us. Her hair swayed, hitting me with that odor that was so hideously sweet it made me dizzy. It was like standing near a rotted bouquet of flowers, but nice. “You make her sound so diabolical.”“Diabolical is putting it nicely,” she said. “I’m actually surprised she didn’t meet us here.”We found our seats through the closely packed rows on the floor. Ours were on the edge, which I liked. Edythe’s talking streak seemed to have died out, so I killed the little time we had left by catching up on Angela and Jessica’s texts about the dance, and by people-watching. A few minutes before the show started, two girls took the seats in front of us. One of them looked so much like Jessica that I had to look twice. It wasn’t her, of course, but the straight brown hair and long nose were almost exactly the same.It reminded me of another question I had.“Hey,” I said over the noise, leaning over. “What did you do to Jessica Stanley to make her hate you so much?”She looked confused for a second before understanding crossed her face. “When we moved here, Mike Newton nurtured quite the obsession over me. It was a hit to poor Jessica’s ego.”“He liked you?” I gasped. “I mean – if he liked you then I don’t understand what he sees in me.”She made a noise that could have been a laugh or a scoff. “You don’t see yourself very clearly.”I opened my mouth to respond when the lights suddenly dropped. The stadium filled with cheering as the opening act strode out, a group I wasn’t familiar with. Only some people stood up, so I stayed in my seat, swaying along a little. None of their songs stood out to me, but they weren’t awful.Finally, the music died down. There were a few minutes of tense quiet, and then the lights went black again. The cheering from before grew into a single-minded roar, and the opening note of a new song reverberated through my head as everyone on the floor jumped to their feet. I did my best to forget who I was with, and it was surprisingly easy. If Alice Cullen was going to work so hard to manipulate us, I may as well enjoy myself.The floor was full of writhing bodies, many of which had poured forward against the stage. Everyone, including me, screamed the lyrics along with the band. They were incredible live – just as good as what was recorded. Even I was dancing – no easy feat – and letting my body just move to the music.I glanced up at Edythe from time to time. She was sort of swaying, with her eyes closed, and singing the words lowly to herself. Kind of strange, but maybe people would assume she was on shrooms or something.It was hard to tear my eyes away from her. Pink, orange, blue and purple lights flashed and strobed across the stadium. They all jumped right off of her skin, like some sort of disco ball. Looking at her for too long was like watching a 3D movie without glasses. No one else seemed to notice, but it made my head spin. Without her looking back at me, I could stare at her face for longer, examine the strangeness of it against everything I now knew.They played my personal favorite, and I finally turned away from Edythe. I was starting to understand why people liked concerts so much – it was like a religious experience, a sermon led through sound and light.The next time I glanced away from the stage, the Jessica look-alike and the girl she had shown up with were kissing. Or maybe kissing was too decent a word. Not-Jessica wound her fingers through her companion’s hair, pulling their bodies together. It didn’t bother me, I just…couldn’t stop looking. I stared, transfixed. As the song ended, they broke apart, leaning their foreheads together and giggling.I wondered if Edythe had seen. I didn’t dare look at her.The next song began, their most popular one, and the stadium erupted anew. It was infectious. I jumped and screamed, wondering when my voice would give out. It went on and on, and the crowd never lost its fervor. The band came back for an encore – twice. I was disappointed when the last note faded out, even though it had been nearly three hours.The lights all came on at the same time, the bubble of anonymity in the crowd popped, and I was next to Edythe Cullen again. It was disorienting. I felt sick and exhausted and sweaty.Without a word to me, Edythe started walking. Everyone shuffled around in a post-concert trance, moving toward the exits at a sluggish pace. Except for Edythe. Again, she parted the sea easily, only this time she was walking so fast I would have to jog to keep up.The ringing in my ears was just audible under the hum of the crowd. People pushed in all around me, and I nearly lost sight of her a few times as the distance between us increased. What if she didn’t wait for me? Would it really be so out of character for her to leave me here? I decided I wouldn’t give her a chance, and I broke into a jog. There was some shouldering and some glares thrown my way, but I caught up to her and I grabbed her hand.She stopped cold. I almost slammed into her back as the momentum ceased. Edythe half-turned, and her hand pulled away awkwardly. I didn’t let go. It gave me a sick sort of satisfaction to think that I was the one making her uncomfortable for once.Our eyes remained locked, hers wide and bewildered and mine… well, who knew. After a tense second, she turned away again. Her fingers curled around mine and I was pulled into her immediate wake. I watched her shoulder blades shift through the fabric of her shirt. Her hand was like ice.It seemed like a damn eternity passed before we made it outside. I sucked in cool air, hoping it would clear my head.“That was great,” I said, like everything was as normal as it had been before I touched her. My voice was hoarse from the screaming. “What did you think?”She dropped my hand. “It was loud,” she said fondly.“You didn’t think it would be loud?”“It’s nice to balance out the voices in my head with some on the outside.”I caught up to her side, probably because she had slowed down for my sake. “What do you mean?”“I…” she looked at the ground. “Have you ever been in a crowded train station?”“…No.”“Imagine you’re standing in one, and it’s crowded, and everyone is speaking at once, incessantly, their words echoing off of every surface. Imagine they all begin to hum the same note, at the same time.”I thought about it. “That…sounds nice.”She didn’t answer. I didn’t know how to keep her talking. I liked it when she talked. When she wasn’t being rude, anyway. “Do you, um –?”We were almost to the car, so naturally that’s when I tripped. My stupid heeled shoe caught on a bump in the road, and I fell forward with an undignified squeak……into Edythe. As though she had been right in front of me the entire time. A hand caught my upper arm, and a hand caught me by the waist. Much more gently than during the car wreck, and much more confusing to me.Our faces were inches apart, even closer than the day of the blood typing. My breath puffed into clouds. Hers didn’t. The single moment that she held me seemed to last a lifetime. My heart beat each beat like it was the last, and my throat dried up like the Phoenix desert. I realized, jarringly, that I very much wanted to lean forward.“You’re a vampire,” I gasped instead. It had been in the back of my mind all night, nebulous and terrifying. I wanted her to laugh in my face and tell me I was wrong. Maybe it would make me feel better about…about wanting to lean forward.She let go of me very abruptly, stepping back, and for the span of a few breaths just stared at me with very wide eyes. Then she turned robotically toward the car and started walking. Unsteady and panicked, I followed.She started the car and drove much too quickly through the traffic, zipping us out of the Dome’s gravity in what seemed like an impossible amount of time. I tried to pretend that my skin wasn’t still buzzing where she had touched me.“Well?” I asked. “Am I right?”“Yes,” Edythe said, calmly.“But they called you cannibals.”“Vampire is an eastern concept,” she answered. “Native Americans wouldn’t have known the word back then.”“So how – is the animal blood a back-and-forth type of thing? Are there times that you – ”“Animal blood all the time, Swan,” she said, that old irritation creeping back in.“But there are…others like you. The legend – your family was different. So there are vampires out there. Vampires are real.”“Yes, there are others. Most are not…like us. A very few are.”“Why?”“Why do we do it?” She didn’t look at me. She hadn’t looked at me. “It’s a choice. Carlisle chose this life, and when he made me, I had to choose as well.”“When he made you?”“A bite,” she murmured.I pictured the beautiful doctor, elegant cheekbones perfect hair. I tried to picture what she was describing and couldn’t.“I was born in 1894,” Edythe said. She paused, I imagine, to see if I was going to react to that. I didn’t. I didn’t think I had the headspace to react to that at all. “In Chicago. My father died when I was young, he left my mother a failing jewelry shop. She raised me alone. I worked for her. Things probably would have improved had I married – God knows mother tried that. I made things difficult for her. After all, I was young. Nineteen. There was still time…”She sighed gently. Her voice changed as she talked, slipping into that dialect she sometimes had. One from a far off time and place, sort of hypnotizing, actually, especially here in the dark. I thought of the time period she claimed to be from – Edwardian? Curly hair and frilly dresses with painted pink cheeks?“It didn’t matter,” Edythe said, “because my mother fell ill. An early wave of sickness that would become the Spanish Influenza. After a few days, I contracted the same symptoms. It progressed…quickly. We were taken to the hospital. Then the morgue. We weren’t dead, but we were dying. Near the end, I remember being lucid enough to see her, in the cot next to mine, and the doctor leaning over her. There wasn’t supposed to be anyone in the morgue – it was essentially a quarantine.“And then, pain. A lot of pain. I was…changing, and changing fast. You see, my mother convinced the doctor to save me. She’d known, on some level, what he was, and begged him – “ She broke off with a sharp intake of breath. The engine revved in feline distress. “Later, he told me he did it because I had a kind face.”Her expression had no place on a teenager. Her eyes were so much older. A hundred years older. In the light of a passing car, she suddenly looked at me. I heard myself gasp.Edythe Cullen wasn’t mean – she was in pain. She was…old!“Say something,” she murmured.“Your turn.”She chuckled bitterly. “Don’t say that. Tell me what you’re thinking.”“I’m…trying…to not think,” I told her. I felt her turn to look at me again, and the side of my face burned. “So ask me something. Please.”The car shot out onto the interstate, easily maneuvering past every other vehicle until it was just us in the dark. I didn’t tell her to slow down.I heard her lips part a moment before she spoke. “What is it you’re trying to fix with your father?”No punches pulled there. I sank into the seat and crossed my arms over my stomach. Edythe’s windbreaker crinkled merrily. “When…when I was twelve, I told my mom I didn’t want to visit Charlie anymore. He was supposed to have custody of me in the summers, and then I’d be with my mom for school the rest of the time. I would come up here, and me and Charlie would…fish. Hang out at the reservation. Watch reruns. I thought it was boring.”Understatement, actually. I thought I would die of boredom. I dreaded going to Forks all year. “With my mom, in Phoenix, things were…” Crazy, chaotic. She took me to art shows with her hippie friends and we stayed up late to watch old movies on TV with Phil, the cinephile. “Fun. I had my friends, too. Watching them all have fun in the summers was killing me.”Friendships that had all withered away, anyway. I rested the back of my head against the car seat, taking a deep breath and releasing it. “Normally, kids don’t get to just decide they don’t want to see one parent. It shouldn’t have been my choice, really. Renée tried to talk me out of it, but I was being such a little bitch, and she gave in.” I thought I was right, and justified, because my reasons for wanting to leave Forks were the same that hers had been. Maybe that’s why she understood. Maybe that’s why Charlie…allowed it. “He agreed to it, and they worked out that he would come to Phoenix for a few weeks every summer instead.”What an unfair proposition. I hadn’t thought it at the time, but this situation had been terrible for everybody. Renée and Charlie and Phil, all forced together for my sake. And I had barely paid them any mind. The time I spent with Charlie was reluctant.“I do love my dad,” I said, feeling tears well up. “But I was such a brat. I hated that he was a cop, I hated that he didn’t know anything about movies or TV, I hated that he was so small-town. Like, I don’t know why I was like that, but I was. It’s fucked up.“So when Mom and Phil decided to move to Florida, I thought…I’m going to have to finish high school somewhere new. I may as well…try to make it up to Charlie. Somehow.”I was definitely self-aware of my own sob story. Edythe had just told me how she died a hundred years ago, and I was listing off my personal issues like they were of equal value. But, hey, she had asked.“How is that going?” She asked me quietly, and it almost sounded like she cared.“Very poorly,” I said. “I’m still a little bitch.”“Hm,” she said, neither agreeing nor disagreeing.Then, silence. Almost fifteen minutes of it, with no music playing on the stereo to break it up. I counted the minutes on the dashboard clock. I was exhausted.“That first day…” I began, but did not know now to finish.“I wondered when you’d bring it up.”“I was scared,” I admitted. “But then I was angry. What is it about me? You aren’t vampires and Catholic racists, are you?”I saw one-half of a smile. “Is that what you landed on?”“At first. Why else did you…?”“Swan,” Edythe said, “I don’t know how to put this.”I waited, heart pounding against my ribcage, my ribcage fluttering. Edythe’s mouth opened, forming around words that she thought better of.“You caught me on a bad day.”Disappointed, I shifted in my seat. “I want to know what I did to you, to make you hate me.”She glared ahead at the road, shoulders setting defensively. “I don’t hate you.”“You hate me,” I declared, turning to her, bracing an arm on the dash. “You hate that I know about you, but even before that you were awful to me. It didn’t have to be like that, did it? It drove me insane.”“Likewise,” Edythe said tersely.“But what did I do?”“You made me doubt myself,” Edythe said in a rush, then she blinked wide like she hadn’t meant to. She glanced at me. “Sit down.”I eased myself back against the seat, seatbelt clinging to my waist and chafing my shoulder. There was an explosion of warmth inside my chest. “What do you mean?”“I couldn’t hear your thoughts. That made you an enigma, and I resented that I had to pay attention to you.”“That’s it?”“No one ever accused me of diffidence.”But there was something pinched in her tone, and I didn’t think I was getting the truth.Silence stretched even longer this time. There was plenty I wanted to say and all of it seemed pointless. All that was left to do was digest what I had learned, and what I hadn’t. Something was happening, and I didn’t understand it one bit. There was no trace of the competitiveness I felt earlier. I felt…I felt terrified of Edythe. Could she tell?It was almost midnight when we pulled up to Charlie’s house. I was shocked that the time had passed so quickly. Edythe put the car in park and suddenly the car was filled with tension.“I had a good time tonight,” I said. It was true. I put my hand on the handle.“Swan,” Edythe said. “Wait.”My bones made an honest effort to vibrate out of my skin as Edythe turned to face me with the full intensity of her gaze.“I won’t lie, one of the reasons I would like to keep my distance from you is to spite my sister.” Her eyes flashed yellow and gold, gold and yellow. “But it’s not the only reason. I think we should honor the agreement.”“The what?” I said, then: “Oh.”“It’s for the best.”“Yeah.” The fluttering finally died. “Of course.”“Good,” she said tonelessly. “Good night.”“Night.” I stood on wobbly knees and walked away. Her car was gone by the time I reached the porch.There was an emptiness in my chest, a sort of relief from exertion. It wasn’t exactly pleasant.Charlie was snoring loudly on the couch. I threw a blanket over him, and it wasn’t until I disturbed the air that I realized the sweet smell of the jacket was still affecting me. I managed to stave off the hyperventilating until I got to my room.I had just spent the night with a vampire. I ripped the jacket off and let the air of my bedroom raise goosebumps on my arms. Vampire. There really was no getting around it. She was a vampire.And I had wanted to lean forward.I kicked the windbreaker into the closet and ripped off the rest of my clothes to get rid of that smell. That must be the source of all my craziness. I had to get away from the smell. It was sweeter than it had been before, and my head ached.I sat half-naked on the floor until the shivers were uncontrollable.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Edythe
I returned home to find that Alice’s visions were more certain than ever. She flung them at me as one throws confetti, careless of the mess. It caused me intense distress, but I was not actually surprised. My night with the Swan girl had created as many discrepancies as it had meant to resolve.For one: I liked her.This did surprise me. I saw the visions, but I had given them no credit. In this, the future was my enemy, even if that stance was one doomed to fail – had failed. Bella Swan should have been dull and unintelligent and a nuisance.Instead, she was unpredictable. And sharp. Speaking to her was unfortunately electric, because she did not say what I expected her to say, and certainly not what I wanted.Esme was reading a book on the back patio. Carlisle was in his study. Alice and Emmett had been on a TV binge. Someone – probably Alice – was tapping their foot. They were tense. My family – traitors all of them – had not doubted Alice’s visions at all. They thought I would come home and throw a tantrum over being proven wrong.I walked inside with feigned casualness.Your face looks weird, Rosalie thought immediately, with a spark of…disappointment? Emmett and Jasper were mouthing to one another, making bets on how quickly Alice would provoke me. The pot stirrer in question waited at the piano bench, eyes wide in her face.“Hi,” I said, wanting to head this off.Hi! Alice grinned. I sat next to her. I saw you catch her! I saw you holding hands!I flexed my fingers as I set them on the keys. There was an afterburn across my fingertips. Her hand was scaldingly hot, like a bundle of twigs from the heart of a bonfire. And she had been sweating, which made heat pour off of her against me, her scent torturing me to distraction. I had tried to escape her without realizing what I was doing. She had caught me.Alice watched my face closely. I began playing a simple tune, not particularly happy but gradually intricate. More Wagner than Arrau.Emmett muted the television. Carlisle paused in his study, Esme closed her book with a sigh. It had been a while since I played.Edythe is composing again? Rosalie thought, and in that second her guard dropped. Over her?Bella Swan’s face, tinged heavy with judgement. I turned, wrestling with an odd urge to jump to Swan’s defense. Rosalie, I could see, had labored under the impression that if any woman were to capture my interest, it would be…“You?” I said. I didn’t laugh at her, though she would deserve it.Panic flared in Rosalie’s mind, but she rolled her eyes and stood. If you tell anyone, I’ll hunt you like a dog. Then, quieter, please just forget it.Esme appeared in the short quiet, laying a hand on my shoulder.“Don’t stop, Edythe.” It’s lovely.“Yes, ma’am.” I decided to ponder Rosalie’s psyche later, and played my frustrations out into something new. It was too angry, too baroque. No, I would have to work on it.Oh, my sweet Edythe. Esme sighed. Why do you look so sad?“I don’t know,” I murmured. Alice tracked our half-silent discussion with narrowed eyes.Give it time, Esme thought. Let yourself adjust to this. It’s a big change, and that won’t come easy. Even to us.Oh, God. That was almost worse than Carlisle’s attempt. I just nodded, occupying myself with refinements and key changes. If I really focused, I could catch traces of that scent on my clothes, like freesia or cherry. That I could discern distinct notes in the smell of that blood would have been laughable to me three weeks ago, when it just burned.“Did you at least enjoy the concert?” Alice asked brusquely.I made a motion purposefully between a nod yes and a shake no. Esme retreated up to Carlisle’s study. They were listening to my music and making eyes at one another. Emmett had followed Rose outside. I was trying not to hear what Jasper was gleaning from my mood.“Edythe,” Alice pushed. “You always do this.”“What is it I do?”“The dramatics. The moping. The playing piano.” She plinked the highest key for emphasis. You can’t stand it when I’m right.“C’mon, leave her alone.” Emmett was back, too curious.“Shut up, Emmet. Like you aren’t dying to know.”“Like you didn’t see it already,” I said, playing slightly louder.She started banging a disjointed version of Chopsticks that pushed my hands out of alignment. “I know what happened. You talked.” I want to know what about! “You wouldn’t understand.” There was a very minute scratch on the piano housing that I had never noticed before. Tiny, but irritating. “Also, it’s none of your business.”I understand better than you think. She flashed me a memory – her first one. A vision of Jasper’s face. It had come with such an overwhelming sense of security and love that she had known within seconds of waking up where she had to go.“Quit it,” I said. It was entirely too personal.Alice watched me. No one cares that she’s a girl. That sort of thing isn’t a problem anymore – though you always hated that Tanya – “I didn’t hate it,” I hissed.
Yeah, yeah. You just hated how cavalier she is about it. You’ve always feared the sexuality of others.
“Alice,” I bit out, looking over at the familiar, doll-like features. Bright clips held on haphazardly in her short hair. I looked at her, and I felt annoyance. I looked at Bella Swan, and I wanted to tell her my whole life story. What was that?She threw her head back and groaned. “Oh my god, Edythe. You’re not going to tell me anything?”I could see, in the back of Alice’s thoughts where she routinely flipped through all the futures available to her – Jaspers, mine, her own, the Denalis – that Bella would talk to me on Monday in class. I abandoned the new piece I had begun, switching over to the cacophony of a late, atonal Liszt.Alice responded with the image of Bella as one of us, immortal and beautiful.“I’m not talking about this,” I sang along with the staccato, quickening the pace of my fingers until any human listening would have become nauseous.“What-ever.” Alice leaped up, balling her hands into fists. “Wallow in it for all I care.”Jazz gets my money if you yell back, Emmett thought. Be cool, be cool.I slowed the music back down, weaving in a melody of my own. I played until everyone had relaxed, realizing the show was over, and then I played some more. Alice simmered down, because in the end she knew she was winning.What she was wrong about was my fear. I didn’t fear sexuality. I wouldn’t say I feared love, either. At least, not conceptually. But it was different for vampires, and terribly permanent. Love, for us, was something lost. I had never wanted that, not even if the rest was somehow worth it. And despite the visions – I was not in love with her. The future was not set in stone. I would have to be.
__________________________________

Bella
Somehow, I slept through the night. I didn’t have any dreams either – no cars or men on dark streets – and actually woke up well-rested. I yawned and stretched before reality hit me. Then I was huddled on my side, staring sightlessly at the early morning sun in the window.Vampires were real. Now that I had slept on this, I felt I had a better grasp on it but no sense of how to move forward. Was I meant to live a normal life, knowing what I now knew? Was I supposed to do something about it?These questions, though, took a hard backseat to the real problem at hand.I had spent a night with Edythe Cullen, and I had liked it, and I had – fleetingly, but unretractably – suffered an urge to kiss her. The problem wasn’t really that, but the way it was forcing me to rethink everything else. If I wanted to kiss her, then what did that mean? Did it mean I liked her, or did it mean I just thought she was – was –I didn’t know who to talk to. I was going to explode if I kept it all to myself. I thought very briefly about calling one of my Phoenix friends to freak out on them – some of them had been bisexual, so maybe…I heard some furtive clattering downstairs and threw myself out of bed. “Dad?” I called down the stairs.There was pause before, “Bells?” He had been sneaking off fishing again. Or maybe not sneaking, since I had forgotten to make any kind of plans with him. He rounded the kitchen corner and looked up at me.“Are you going fishing?” He didn’t have his pole or tackle box or anything.“No,” he said. “Just going to see Billy. I’m helping him out with some gardening.”“Can I come?”He nearly stumbled back in his shock. “What?”“I want to see Jacob anyway, so…” At this, Charlie relaxed a little bit. Like one made so much more sense than the other. Please – I could garden!“The kid sleeps ‘till noon, Bella. He won’t be much company.”“I just wanted to get out of the house. I’ll bring my homework! I’ll –” I stopped myself, noticing Charlie surpass surprise and head toward impatience. “I mean, is it okay? If you don’t want me to…?”“Bells,” he said, stilted, “I told him I’d be there by eight. Come on if you wanna come on.”This wasn’t exactly an invitation, but it was enough. I pulled sweats over my sleep clothes and swiped on a thin layer of lipstick, joining Charlie with my backpack and new boots. In the car, he played classic rock and we sipped on matching thermoses of coffee. He asked me about the concert, and I told him the barest, most censored truth – the concert was fun, and Edythe was a very nice girl.It was how Charlie had described her – all of the Cullens – when I first asked about them. Very nice girls and boys, with very nice parents. An antiquated, entirely appropriate term. I had no doubt that, outside of the vortex of disdain that I created, Edythe was quite a nice girl.The thing was, older people described me that way, too.“You don’t remember,” Charlie started when we had passed the turnoff my friends had taken toward the beach. “One year when you were seven, Billy’s garden managed some tomatoes. You and Jake ate so many you threw up salsa. You were sick for a whole weekend.”I only remembered Charlie telling me the story once before. “Ew.”“You were a little tomboy. I remember having to pick off ticks after you – ““Ew!” I reiterated. Charlie laughed at me.The first houses of the reservation appeared, sporadically, as the suggestion of wood paneled and brick walls down long drives heavy with foliage. Then they got closer together, and I could see chipped paint and lavish porch chairs and some sweet yard statuary. A large cement Bigfoot glared at the cruiser as we passed it.No one was outside, though the misty rain was beginning to taper as the sun peeked out. I saw one pair of people walking side by side beneath an umbrella, but they didn’t look up at us. Charlie turned off the main road onto a street with less houses and more encroaching forest. At the very end, in the shadow of looming pines and quickly browning grass, was Billy Black’s house.I remembered it. For real. I remembered the scratched porch swing, the basketball hoop standing at the end of the street. I remembered Billy and Charlie walking behind me as I pedaled on a tiny red bike, along with the ever-present smell of Rainier beer and rain. When we went inside the red-painted house, Charlie holding the screen door and announcing us, I remembered the faded green couch and oval rug. A Big Mouth Billy Bass watched me with one beady eye.“Charlie and Bella?” Billy questioned, wheeling out of the kitchen. “I’ll be damned.”“She wanted to tag along to see Jacob,” Charlie said.“Oh.” Billy released an incredulous laugh. He was wearing a Nike hoodie and very white sneakers. “He’s not up yet. Let me – ““Don’t,” I said. “Please. He can sleep in. I brought school stuff to work on.”“Nah,” Billy said, turning, “I’m gonna wake him up.”Charlie set down a canvas bag he’d brought with him, revealing a bag of manure. “We got lucky, sun’s out all day. Tomorrow, too.”At the end of the hallway, Billy rapped a fist against a closed door. “Sun’s always good. Jacob! Bella and Charlie are here! And Bella!”I cringed in sympathy. A muted voice called something from behind the door. Billy swiveled and came toward us. “He’ll be out. Grab something out of the kitchen if you get hungry.”“Okay,” I said, sitting on the couch. Charlie held the back door open and the two of them hurried outside to do…whatever it was they were doing. The next few minutes were quiet. I caught up on the group messages Jessica was blowing up with pictures from the dance. She and Angela had looked beautiful, Ben very cute and Mike just okay.There was a series of bangs, then the door down the hall flew open. Jacob walked into the living room, hair a mess, rubbing both eyes, and stared at me.“Good morning,” I said, apologetic.“Morning,” he said, yawning. “Didn’t know you were coming today.”“Neither did I. It was last-minute.” I shifted, cradling my bag to my chest. “You really don’t have to hang with me, if you want to go back to sleep. I brought homework.”He looked warily at my bag. “Homework? I’m not a monster. Hang tight for a minute while I brush my teeth.”He reappeared minutes later with his hair brushed and bound at the nape of his neck, and unreasonably baggy sweats that almost matched my own. “Are you hungry?” He asked, disappearing into the kitchen.“No.”He came back out with a bottle of soda and a crumpled pizza box. “Do you want to see the garage?”He insisted on sneaking through the front door, then around the side of the house. The garage – a lopsided aluminum outpost peeking out from a copse of trees – was behind the house and past some rocky, hole-pocked earth. Across the backyard, Charlie stood with the bag of manure, walking around some equally aluminum bins holding variously textured green plants at Billy’s direction. It was still early, and clouds lingered in the sky, but the day was already brighter than I had seen so far. The clouds were light powder instead of ashen blocks.“What’s he growing?”“Buncha lettuce, I think, and garlic.”I raised my eyebrows. The garage had a big rolling door to fit a car through, and one regular sized one next to it. Jacob kicked this one open and strode into the dim interior. The room was big and mainly empty, save a group of five folding chairs and an incredibly beat up sofa gathered around a large black rug. Closer to the rolling door – which Jacob was pulling open now – were two large shapes beneath tarps, surrounded by tools and…parts. A mini fridge hummed in the far corner, and as he flipped a switch, bare lightbulbs flickered to life above us, as well as a stereo boombox, which immediately began blaring rap music.“Wow,” I said. “This is cool.”He grinned. “Thanks!”“And these are…?”I hovered a hand over one of the shapes, already with a good idea of what I was looking at. They weren’t cars.Jake set his food down on a chair and pulled off the tarp, revealing an intimidating, though clearly incomplete, motorcycle. Not a scooter, or a bike, but a real motorcycle. It came up to my navel at the handlebars. The engine pieces were shiny and silver, with dustier metal exoskeleton in places. It leaned on its kickstand, facing the road like a caged bull.“You’re fixing it?” I asked.“I built it,” he said, with no small amount of pride. “From scratch.”I was appropriately awed. “That…is so cool! Are you going to sell them?”He nodded. “Yeah. Sure.”We sat beneath the lightbulbs while he consumed the patron breakfast of teenage boys – Coke and pepperoni – and I couldn’t hold it in any longer. “I went to that concert last night,” I said.Jacob lowered his cell phone. “Oh, yeah? How was it?”“Weird,” I said. “Really weird.”He leaned back in his chair, long legs kicked out in front of him, hands folded over his stomach. “Cullen didn’t try to eat you, did she?”I realized that he was joking a second too late. Something passed over my face that made him frown. “No,” I said slowly. Jacob noticed how serious I was and sat up.“What the hell happened?” He asked just as seriously, moving to sit on the couch, facing me. He drew one leg up and his knee touched mine. A strange heat radiated up my spine, and I mistook it, for a second, as desire. I had the wild urge to lean forward and kiss Jacob.Just as quickly, I recoiled at the idea. It was not desire and kissing him wouldn’t prove what I probably wanted it to prove. The warmth was apprehension, and fear, and it only sharpened as I pictured Edythe’s face, smiling at me across a restaurant table.“She’s really intense,” I said carefully. “We…”Jacob raised his eyebrows, waiting with patience I wouldn’t have expected. I wondered if I should tell him this at all – what if he didn’t take it well? Not everyone was readily supportive of this kind of thing. Especially in this part of the county.“I – I don’t really have a lot of friends,” I admitted, looking out the open door to the green ferns. “Sorry. I don’t know who else I would talk to about…”When I looked back at him, he had an odd look on his face. Expectant and wary. “You know,” he said, “Cullen has come up in pretty much every conversation we’ve had since you moved here.”I flushed immediately with shame. “Oh my God, you’re right! I should just shut up – ““And you get this really funny look,” he continued, raising his eyebrows further. “Like angry, but not. And you said that she hated you, or you thought she did, but then why did you guys go out together last night?”“We didn’t go out –” I started. Edythe hadn’t even bought the tickets herself. “– and I don’t think she hates me anymore, but –”“But what?”I thought about her hands on me. Catching me, pulling me from the path of a sliding car, her eyes so disapproving all the time.“But I’m conflicted,” I said, lowering my voice, unable to look at him. At least he didn’t go to school with us. Edythe couldn’t read his mind all the way out here. “I think she might – might really be dangerous.”I glanced up at him. He was smirking. “Jake,” I said, “I’m dead serious.”“Dangerous how?” He asked, incredulous. “She, like, a drug dealer or something?”I snorted. “No. Dangerous, like I could get hurt.”His smirk faded. “Oh,” he said, like he’d heard me say something different. I was trying to impress upon him the seriousness of the Quileute legends, but of course he had picked up something else. Something no less true. “You like her,” he said.I said, “Maybe.”I heard Jacob take a deep breath, then release it. “Is this…like…a first time thing for you?”Vampires or girls? I thought, then nodded.“Gotcha. And you told me because…?”I looked up, scared that I had read this wrong and he was either offended or entirely uncaring. “Like I said, I don’t have a lot of options.” This probably was offensive, so I followed with, “And you’re…I don’t know, I feel like I could tell you anything.”“No, you can,” he said eagerly, shifting forward, grinning suddenly. “I thought maybe you picked up on, ah,” he grimaced and looked up, “me.”I frowned, uncomprehending.“Me,” he repeated. “I’m – gay.”He cringed a little as he said it. I cringed as I heard it. “What?” I said, stupidly, “Gay?”Funnily, he looked dazed. “I’ve never said it out loud before. Huh.”“You’re gay and I’m the first person you told?” I stated, shocked to my core at this turn of events.“Back atcha,” he muttered, and I wondered if I was handling this very badly.“Jake…I had no idea. Thank you for telling me. That’s…” I laughed. “That’s such a relief.”“Good,” he said, smiling again. “Glad to be of service.”“How long have you known?”“Um…I was pretty young. Twelve maybe.”I exhaled. “That’s a long time.”He shrugged. “This Cullen chick must be pretty special to have this effect on you. You didn’t know about…yourself before?”The most terrifying thing about all of this was that I had started to think about my past. I saw things in a different light, like just the possibility of being attracted to a woman gave me x-ray vision into my past friendships. “Maybe?” I said. “I just never…I’ve only dated two people, and they were…duds.”There was Aaron, the soccer player who’d taken my virginity at a Junior year prom party, and Tyler (Yarbrough, not Crowley) the Valedictorian of last year’s senior class in Phoenix. Both awkward and fumbling in general and even more so when it came to touching me. I was sure I wasn’t much better. But that’s how high school romance went, generally, wasn’t it? That’s what Renée had assured me of.“Were you scared?” I asked.Jacob chewed his lip, hesitating for a long beat. “Yeah,” he finally said.Affection bloomed in my chest. I had just hoped for someone to listen, and instead I had stumbled onto something much more reassuring. “What do I do now?”If I could acknowledge what I was feeling enough to tell Jacob, then it was real. And it being real in no way simplified anything. In fact it made everything worse.“Do you think she feels the same way?” Jacob asked. I shook my head. He elbowed me (playfully, but it hurt). “Come on. You went to that concert together. Did you have fun?”Fun was a strong word. It was certainly interesting. “We talked a lot. She…asked me a lot about myself.” Her interest in me was puzzling, but I was too wary to be flattered. I thought it was more likely she had just tried to even the score on our bargain. “But then, she told me that she doesn’t think we should hang out again. Or even talk.”“Oh,” Jacob said, frowning. “What for?”“She didn’t really say,” I lied.Jacob made a darkly amused sound. “Sounds familiar, actually.”“What do you mean?”“Um.” He made a face. “There’s this…guy…” I lit up with interest, which made him sink down into the cushions in shame. “It’s nothing. He’s a huge jerk.”“And you like that?”“He wasn’t always –” He paused. “It’s an act. He used to be – but now, I don’t know. He’s hanging with this…new crowd.”“And he…”“He’s not gay,” Jacob said with certainty. “I’d know.”“Does anyone know about you?”“No! We’re distinctly lacking L, G, B, or T here on the rez. No way am I volunteering to be the first.”He reached over and took my hand, squeezing. The gesture was so natural, so easy, that I automatically sank into his side, resting my head on his shoulder. Nothing romantic about it, just insane warmth bleeding from his body. His hand felt feverish against mine.“But you know,” he said. “And maybe Billy, but we’ve never talked about it.”“Our secret,” I promised.“Totally. Although it would be hysterical to see the look on Billy’s face when he finds out you like a Cullen.”I shuddered at the thought, at what I knew and what Billy Black knew – or thought he knew. I thought about whether or not Edythe Cullen could like me, and what it would even mean if she did. I was probably barking up the wrong tree, and should just silently thank her for helping me to this realization about myself as we went our separate ways.Most of all, I was thinking that I might love Jacob Black. A lot. “Thank you,” I murmured into his chest. It was very solidly built.“Don’t mention it.”I was getting that feeling that Charlie elicited in me – guilt. Love. Shame. All tied together in a perfect knot. Jacob had not forgotten our friendship, all these years. He was so perfectly kind to me, brotherly, warm (really, very warm, maybe he was coming down with something?), and I had been off in Phoenix forgetting all about him. Maybe if I’d been here when I should have been, he would have told me this. I could have been there for him like I was now, six years too late. I might have even figured my own shit out in a normal way.“I’m sad we weren’t friends all this time,” I said. “I can tell I’ve missed out.”“No reason we can’t make up for lost time,” he said, and eased away from me to hop to his feet. I brushed at my eyes. “I assume you came out here today for a crash course in carburetor maintenance?”“I am your eager pupil.”He picked up a piece of metal. “This is a flathead screwdriver.”I nodded, curling tighter in the cold air and giggling. He’d already lost me.____________________By the time I arrived at school on Monday morning, I had reached a standoff somewhere between constant nausea and determination. I wouldn’t really know what to say to Edythe until I saw her, which turned out to be something I didn’t have to worry about at all.At lunch, the Cullen table was empty. “They always go hiking when the weather’s nice,” Jessica tossed off when I asked, irritated that I had interrupted her recounting of some horrible after-dance rendezvous with Mike. I sensed Angela was equally disgusted, and we kept quiet in solidarity.Anyway, I had stopped listening. The sunshine and relative warmth outside had put me in a very good mood, but the rest of the day I was just numb.____________________ Edythe   I stayed far away from Jasper on Monday. I didn’t want him to know that the good weather was infuriating me beyond sense. I stood outside with the sun reflecting brightly off my skin – no natural oils, no sub-surface scattering of light particles, only fine hairs to ease the reflection. In bright light like this, the humans wouldn’t be able to ignore that something was seriously amiss.Alice was so tuned into my immediate future, watching on a loop for any changes, that I was utterly exhausted hearing it. I knew I had made up my mind, so the fact that my future was flickering like a light was all Swan’s fault. She would talk to me, or she wouldn’t. We would simply be lab partners until spring, or we would be something else entirely. The wider picture – months, years – was still prevailingly something else entirely. The closer future was more unclear.I thrice decided to go to the school and simply hover in the tree line, listening, but I knew that my excuses had run out. I no longer feared that Swan would blow our cover. In fact I knew she wouldn’t.If there was one thing I had learned on Saturday night, it was that Bella Swan was a martyr. She put everyone else in the whole world above herself. I had the key, even if there was no way to access the lock. It explained several befuddling things about her behavior – low self-esteem, despite a wealth of strong interpersonal relationship with peers, crippling guilt over actions taken at a much younger age – the blame for which lied only with her parents – and even self-imposed isolation. I thought that if Jessica Stanley did not so obviously want Mike Newton’s slim offerings, Swan would have said yes to him. She would have been with her friends, at the awful Forks High dance.Or, and I entertained this theory so briefly, she had not gone to the dance because she thought she owed me something. I want to know what I did to you, to make you hate me, she had asked. Could it be that simple? She had plenty of questions for me, gauging the scope of my monstrosity, but that one had been asked with a desperation that burned me. She assumed anything that happened had been her fault (admittedly, that had been my thinking for those first few days, but it was unfair), and she wanted to know what it was. She wanted to fix it, because she could not handle causing me discomfort.I was losing myself in these thoughts. I was spiraling. It was the same pattern I had sensed in Carlisle, after Esme joined our little group and he began noticing her. I watched in mute horror as his thoughts rewired themselves around her, and the intellectual I had devoted my whole second life to became a creature of base desire and sentimentality. Frankly, it disgusted me. It was soon after that I left him for the first time. I had watched it happen with Rosalie and Emmett, too. I knew the signs.I should have taken the long weekend as an opportunity to travel further into the mountains to hunt, but... I had withstood four hours in a car with Swan, and she was still alive. The thirst had not abated, but it had – incredibly – taken a backseat to my frustration.What I wouldn’t give for four more hours. I wanted her brain laid out before me, soft tissue and neurons unraveled. I wanted to understand her by force if I couldn’t by virtue of my gift. I wanted her to explain herself to me. I wanted –“Can I talk to her?” Alice asked, appearing at my elbow.She had put glitter on her face, for fun, so she glowed with a hundred thousand points of bright light. I pulled my earphones out and told her: “I’m no one’s keeper. Do what you want.”She was, in the back of her head, still watching my future. “I won’t let you ruin this for me. Your little agreement doesn’t keep me from talking to her.”I regretted telling her anything about it. “I encourage it. There’s nothing I can think of that would scare her away more thoroughly.”She smiled at me, triumphant. Are you listening to Ricky Nelson?I immediately paused the music on my phone. “I’ve been listening to Ricky Nelson for sixty years.” It didn’t mean anything.
On repeat for five hours straight?
I was irritated and spoke rashly. “You know, I don’t comment on yours and Jasper’s relationship troubles.”Alice’s eyes widened. “So you admit it!”“Oh, shut up.”“Where there are relationship troubles, there are relationship solutions,” she said quickly, enjoying my chagrin. “Maybe that’s where I come in.”“And maybe you’re going to ruin her life,” I said, turning to look at her.Alice’s mood changed instantly. She withdrew and made her mind curiously blank. “Is that really what you think?”I had admitted investment in Swan’s well-being, and Alice wasn’t even gloating. “If you thought about the consequences for five seconds, you would, too.”“Consequences are my bread and butter,” Alice argued, turning on her heel and going back over my strobe-light future. If you were as convinced as you’re pretending to be, I wouldn’t have such a headache.________________________ The storm front arrived in the early morning hours of Tuesday. I got dressed and spent a good deal of time laying on the sofa in my bedroom. There could be no relief from anxiety without a functioning central nervous system. I could not measure my breaths, exercise, or sleep it off. I wasn’t even sure how anxious could exist in a body without adrenal glands. Without trembling, crying, or hyperventilation, I was left with a plagued mind and no recourse.At six in the morning I went out to the car and sat there, playing Mahler on the stereo until my siblings joined me. The Resurrection Symphony had soothed me just a bit, but as we parked in front of the school I was frazzled all over again. My eyes zeroed in – how could they? – on Swan, just entering a doorway with Jessica Stanley. I saw dark hair and brown skin, and it was like no time had passed. I felt, quite vividly, that I had just driven away from her house after the concert, moments ago. Where had I been in the interim? What had I done?Jessica Stanley’s mind was easy for me to focus on now. She was prattling on about the dance – God were the people of this town boring – and I saw Bella, in flashes of thought, listening with interest. Again a martyr. I knew in my frozen heart that it was impossible for anyone to find meaning or purpose in the life of Jessica Stanley.I realized that everyone in the car was staring at me in varying shades of bewilderment. I could see myself through their eyes – back ramrod straight, jaw clenched, eyes wide with horror. I fixed myself, slumping and erasing the expression I had not consciously made.For the first hour of school, I focused every scrap of control I had gathered over my mind over the past century. I took the part of it that was interested in Swan, that had any memory of her at all, and I folded it down into a corner. I shrunk it so small I could reasonably retreat away.Emmett was uncharacteristically quiet in Spanish. I would have enjoyed a distraction, because the part of my brain keeping track of Swan (it was so, so small now) picked up on Mike Newton. He was in Trigonometry, staring at the back of her head. He was thinking horrible teenaged boy thoughts that I was so incredibly used to by now, it shouldn’t have even stuck out.It certainly shouldn’t have ballooned the sectioned off portion of my mind into a raging inferno. It shouldn’t have ignited in me absolute indignant rage.Ed, Emmett thought sharply. What’s up?I was, I saw, having a physical reaction. My hands gripped the sides of my plastic chair so hard they had already molded the plastic to fit their shape. Two more seconds and it would shatter in a quite unexplainable fashion.I pulled my hands into my lap. The chair cracked beneath me but held. Then next person to sit in it might make it collapse. Nothing for it. I shook my head to Emmett. Nothing was wrong, like he worried.You’re not breathing, he pointed out.I sucked air into my lungs automatically.What is it? He repeated, less concerned and more curious.“It’s nothing,” I said.
Right.
Another thought hit me. I battled a similar, more volatile reaction. “I’d like to rip Mike Newton to pieces.”Emmett chuckled. “He after you again, or something?”Mike had thought similar thoughts about me. Also about Jessica Stanley. But those thoughts had never before bothered me like this. People looked directly at me, while speaking to me, and entertained sexual fantasies without knowing I was entirely privy. That bothered me less than this.I shook my head. Emmett concluded quickly with only a vague sense of interest. So you, like, full on like this chick? It was rare that something this big happened to any of us, and when it did, we were all able to talk about it. I was being withholding, shamed by my own inadequacy.At my silence, he was apologetic. I’m happy for you. It’s a good thing, I guess. Fun to see Alice get all worked up, at least.“Thank you, Emmett,” I whispered sarcastically. To pass the time, I decided to create a fantasy of my own – dismembering Newton in a way that would cause him maximum pain for the longest amount of time before his heart gave out.The bell rang, and Emmett and I walked to the lunchroom in silence. My attention was across campus, where Bella was beginning to walk this way with Angela Weber.What should I do? Did I talk to her? Did I act normal? I didn’t know what normal was anymore. Eager to get to our table and look normal, I started walking much too fast. Emmet had to grab my arm to slow me down. I jerked free but forced my pace to match his.I’ve never seen you so jumpy, he thought.I sat and waited like a man at the gallows.Your emotions are all over the place, Jasper thought, like he was the mind reader. I looked at him. I’m sorry, but I know what this is.I wanted to leave. I probably should have. The signs were all there – Alice saw it, Jasper felt it, everyone else knew about it. All that was left was the fall.Unfair how quickly it had come over me.Emmett was next to me. Alice, Jasper, and Rosalie all saw Bella Swan when she walked in. I was invited to several intensive angles of her appearance, colored with my siblings’ new perspectives. Emmett kicked me when he saw me stop breathing again.Alice noticed loudly when Bella looked to our table three times before sitting with her back to us. Jessica Stanley noticed as well. “Hey,” Jessica asked her in a whisper, “did you ever figure out why Alice Cullen was staring at you?”Bella’s heart increased in tempo. I knew it was hers without looking. How the hell could I know? “Yeah, actually. She wanted to give me some concert tickets she couldn’t use.”Jessica and Angela Weber exchanged a look of surprise. “Um, what?” Jessica queried.“Yeah,” Bella said, with a hint of laughter. “That’s where I was Saturday, actually.”What was she doing? What was to be gained by telling them this? I ran it through my martyrdom theory – secrets made her guilty, at least when they were her own. She wouldn’t tell them any of mine. I doubted she knew I could hear her across the room – but she did know I could hear thoughts. One of her many contradictions – she seemed ready and willing to try to irk me as much as she was able.“We cannot just sit here staring at her,” Rosalie said suddenly, with venom. “Somebody say something. We look ridiculous.”I was, unfortunately, unable to speak. Jasper was looking between me and Alice, bombarded at our dual, roiling emotions. “Um,” Emmett said, brushing bagel crumbs off his fingers. “Edythe’s in a twist over Mike Newton because he’s got the hots for her girl.”“What is wrong with you?” Rosalie asked politely.“You were at a concert Saturday night?” Angela Weber asked Bella. “With Alice Cullen?” She didn’t tell us. I told Jessica to stop gossiping about them – clearly Bella and Edythe are getting along.I wondered where she had gotten that idea. Bella said: “No, I went with Edythe.”I knew it, Angela thought.Jessica, however, was outraged. “What? What the fuck?”“Jess,” Angela said.“You didn’t go to the dance with us, but you hung out with Edythe Cullen? I’ve never even seen you talk to her.”“They’re lab partners,” Angela reminded her.“Oh. They’re lab partners.”Mike Newton heard the conversation and broke away from a football discussion on the other end of the table. “What are you yelling about?”Rosalie sighed and pulled out a book. Emmett leaned over the table to read the blurb on the back cover. Alice stabbed her fork repeatedly into a pile of mashed potatoes.“Apparently, Bella is besties with the Cullens,” Jessica informed Mike. I wondered, with increasing ire, how long they would go without letting Bella actually speak. “She went to a concert with one of them Saturday night.”Mike was very concerned. “I thought you said you were going to Seattle?”Jessica didn’t appreciate the reminder that she had been Newton’s second choice.“The plans changed pretty last-minute,” Bella explained. “Alice Cullen had these tickets, so…”“What is she like?” Angela asked, admirably attempting to steer the conversation in a lighter direction.Bella – one silent form amidst the chaos of the lunchroom – was irritatingly silent for three long seconds. “Alice is really nice,” she said. “I haven’t talked to her that much, but I like her.”She said this a mite haltingly. I wondered if it was true or not – I couldn’t see her face clearly enough. I didn’t know her tells. But Alice thought, in utter rapture, that’s my cue.“Alice,” I said warningly.“You said you didn’t care,” she replied sweetly. “Plus, Bella likes me, which is more than I’ve ever heard her say about you!”Besides the point that this was besides Alice’s entire thesis on my future, it stung. I turned my attention to my tray of food, moving the materials just-so so it might appear that I ate something. Emmett and Jasper spoke to each other, I didn’t know what about. Alice reached Bella’s table, to the shock of everyone there.I heard her making small talk with Bella as they walked together toward Biology.“Did you like the concert?” Alice asked eagerly, truly curious. I was still startled at the depth and potency of her regard for Bella, whom she had spoken to exactly once.“Yeah,” Bella told her, smiling. “It was really... informative!”
“Edythe didn’t bore you to tears, did she?”

“What do you mean?”

“She tends to hate fun in all its forms.”
Bella laughed at this. “I enjoyed myself.”They slowed to a stop in an outdoor walkway around the corner from her destination. I was already sitting in Biology, struggling to look normal as my head and ears strained toward Alice.Hear that? Alice thought smugly at me. “Well, I wanted to ask you if you were going to that benefit thing this Thursday at the hospital.”Bella gave her a wide-eyed look. “What?”
“Our mother – Esme – is one of the event planners with the founder’s club. And you know our father works at the hospital. Last year’s was pretty fun.”
“Yeah, my dad mentioned it…I wasn’t really planning to go.”
“Well, we’re all going. You could ride with us. It’ll be fun!”
Bella blinked at her. “Why are you inviting me?”I was proud of myself for instilling an appropriate amount of suspicion in her.“I’d like to hang out with you,” Alice said, “in a non-life-threatening situation, for a change.”Bella’s expression softened. “Um…okay! I’ll check with my dad.”
“Cool! Can I get your number?”
I pushed my hair over my shoulder, readying as usual for Swan’s approach. I sucked in a reserve of fresh air and opened my textbook to the topic Mrs. Banner was thinking of. Angela Weber and Mike Newton entered ahead of Bella, both glancing at me. Mike suspected – gallantly – that I was a bully that Bella should stay away from. Angela was thinking something entirely different and uncomfortable.Bella Swan entered and took her seat next to me. Her heart was beating too fast. I was sure she would speak, to comment on Alice’s invitation or something. She said nothing, and I said nothing, and across campus Alice was loudly disapproving.
 _________________________

Bella
I worried Charlie was getting the wrong idea about me and Jacob. He seemed overly pleased that we were now texting each other, and I didn’t know how to tell him, nicely, that it was never going to happen. When Jacob invited me to the reservation for a bonfire on Tuesday afternoon, I accepted even though Charlie was going to be so smug.Jacob told me that it was a very casual thing, and I could “bring whoever”. I might have asked Jess or Angela, but after Jessica’s behavior at lunch I wasn’t very eager to invite her anywhere. I drove to La Push as the sun was beginning to set, shrouded in a sweater and coat combo. I had not yet willingly sat outside in a Washington October night. I just hoped the fire was big.I found Jacob in the garage tinkering with the motorcycles again. The other one had been uncovered. It was red instead of black, and leaner. He was only wearing a t-shirt, displaying some incongruous biceps. I would almost swear he had gotten bigger since Sunday.“Don’t take this the wrong way,” I said, “Have you been working out?”He swiped a wrist over his nose, looking down at himself in consternation. “No?”“Hm. How’s your week going?”He did something with a screwdriver that made his brow wrinkle. “Fine. Mostly.”“Something wrong?” I pulled one of the folding chairs closer to the tarp he was sitting on.“Yeah. Paul.”“Who’s that?”“Remember when I told you about my friends?”I listed them. “Quil, Embry, Jared.”His lips twitched. “Well, I left out Paul.”I had thought he was leaving something out that day in Thing. “Why?”A shadow passed over Jacob’s usually cheerful face. “Well, he – “We both heard the snap of a twig, and the murmur of approaching voices. Jacob rolled his head back and groaned. “Speak of the devils. I forgot I told them you were coming.”I straightened out of my slouch anxiously. Two boys rounded the corner of the garage door. One was slender, as tall as Jacob and nearly as muscular with chin-length black hair half-pulled into a knot on top of his head. The second one was shorter, stockier with cropped hair and muscles much more purposeful and earned. They stopped at stared at me.“Hey, guys,” Jacob said offhandedly. “This is Bella. Please be normal.”The taller one looked between me and Jacob, a slow grin spreading on his face. “I’m Embry,” he said, striding over and sticking his hand out. I shook it, noticing his hand was oddly warm, like Jacob’s. Or maybe all teenage boys were furnaces. “This is Quil.”Quil smiled at me, settling into a chair and waving.“Jacob’s told me all about you,” I said in warning.“He’s told us all about you,” Embry shot back, crossing his arms. “I can’t believe Charlie Swan is your dad.”I could guess what he meant. I shrugged.“He’s making you hang out with Jake, right? Out of pity?” Quil asked me. “Blink twice if I’m right.”“Assholes,” Jacob huffed.“I think Charlie’s making Jake hang out with me, actually,” I said. “I’m a gigantic loser.”“They’re perfect for each other,” Quil said to Embry. Jacob whipped a wrench at him. “Ow!”“Is the fire ready yet, or what?” Jacob asked, wiping his hands on a towel. He was frowning. I could see that his friends had made similar assumptions to Charlie about us, and wondered if that bothered him. “C’mon, Bella. We better get down there before all the food’s gone.”“We did see Seth rolling off with your dad,” Embry said, walking in front of us toward the street. “Racing Harry to the hot dog table.”“I’m fucking starving,” Jacob said. I had to trot to keep up with him. It was getting darker, and quickly.“So.” Quil drew up next to me. “You’re friends with the Cullens.”Jacob turned with big eyes. “Dude!” He cried, indignant. “Bella, I just told him – ““It’s fine,” I said, squeezing his arm. I knew he hadn’t told them the important bit. Well, one of the important bits. “Yeah, I go to school with them. I wouldn’t say friends.”“What do they look like?” Quil asked me.I stopped without meaning to. “What?”Quil stopped, too. “Jake said he told you.”Belatedly, Jake and Embry stopped ahead of us, turning back to listen.“The legends?” I asked. “Yeah…he told me.” Something about the way Quil looked at me gave me chills. “You don’t believe them, do you?” I asked, then realized I sounded like a complete ass. “I mean – I mean if you do, that’s f – ““Oh, come on, Quil,” Embry said, rolling his eyes. “Don’t you think people would know if bloodthirsty monsters were going to high school in Forks?”I felt funny. Quil looked at the ground in embarrassment, and I wanted to tell him – no, you’re right, you’re all right.“They’re…something, that’s for sure,” I said. Quil looked up. “Like, they’re different.”“What?” Embry said, doubtful. I started walking again, pushing my hands into my pockets.“I don’t know how to explain it,” I started, remembering how I’d felt on the first day of school. “They’re a really…good-looking family. And they’re quiet. That’s all.”“Tell your dad that,” Embry said, nudging Jacob with an elbow. “They’re just good looking. No need to run them out of town.”“Quil’s dad wants to run them out of town, too,” Jacob said defensively. “Leave me out of it.”I felt guilty knowing what I knew, even if Quil and Billy did technically know the truth already. I told myself that what they didn’t know wouldn’t hurt them – unless they were running around the woods dressed like a deer part-time, they were safe from the Cullens.“What kind of party is this?” I asked. We had crossed over some backyards, and now the trees were thinning. I could hear the ocean somewhere nearby, as well as the murmuring of many voices.“Just the aunts and uncles looking for an excuse to grill out and get drunk,” Jacob said. The trees opened up around a small field, a fire flickering blinding orange at the center. He slowed to walk closer to me.There were about twenty people around the large fire, some sitting on logs, some on blankets farther away. There were plenty of older people, lined faces and elegant gray hair blowing around heavy coats and blankets wrapped over shoulders. There were younger people, too, though still older than me and Jacob. Some children ran around the sand. Billy was sitting in his chair, about twenty feet back from the fire.Jacob led us first toward a card table. There were hot dogs, buns, pokers, and soft drinks. Jacob grabbed a poker and stuck five hot dogs on it.“One of these is for you,” he said.“So kind of you.” I grabbed a set of buns and two bags of chips.Beside Billy was a large quilt. A younger boy, no older than fourteen or fifteen, sat cross-legged in the shadow of his wheelchair. “Bella, this is Seth Clearwater,” Jacob introduced us, handing a water bottle to his father. “He’s basically the little brother I never wanted.”“Hi,” I sat beside Seth, mimicking his position. “I’m Bella.”“Hi,” he said, smiling awkwardly, not meeting my eyes.“Bella,” Billy said. “How’s school going?”“It’s going,” I said. His expression was all friendliness and none of the concern I’d seen the week before in my kitchen. “I was in advanced placement in Phoenix, so everything’s a little slower here. Slow’s good, though.”“Glad to hear it,” he said, looking at me with a thoughtful frown. “Don’t let my boy distract you.”“Dad,” Jacob said sharply, mouthing oh my God at me. He took his poker to the fire, shoving at Embry at Quil for the best position. I looked around, though of course no faces here besides Billy and Jacob’s would be familiar to me. Seth was on his phone playing a game that looked like Frogger.I tried to relax. I tried to not think about school, or Jessica or the Cullens. That all felt very far away when I was with Jacob. It was probably a good thing. My obsession with the Cullens couldn’t be very healthy or normal.I watched Jacob and his friends, smiling as they each got closer and closer to the flames, daring one another closer still. Finally, Embry’s dogs caught flame and he had to run in a circle to keep them from being charred. I saw him look off, laughing, to the left, and then something happened. He stopped laughing and murmured something in Jacob’s ear, then Quil’s. The three of them looked at the group of newcomers, at each other, then turned back to us with matching frowns.It was also a group of three men – they approached a log and sat with plates of food, two of them looking extremely sullen and the third shaking hands and smiling.“Who are they?” I asked Seth. He looked up and shrugged.“Sam Uley and J – and his friends.”I thought he had almost said and Jacob’s friends. I took a closer look, and realized only one of them was actually a man. The other two reminded me of Jacob in that they looked both young and old at the same time, more developed than they should have been. The one that was obviously older, older than me, was less wiry and sturdier, with a bit of pudge around the middle and none around his face. One of the younger ones with short hair like Quil’s and thick, stormy eyebrows was looking in our direction.Jacob was assembling dogs and buns on a plate balanced on his crossed knees, slapping Embry’s hand away when he tried to mess him up. I asked Seth if he knew their names.“Paul Lahote and Jared Cameron,” he said quickly, glancing at Jacob and whispering. “I just know their names from school.”I ate my one hot dog while Jacob ate the other three, and then two hamburgers later on when someone brought a steaming tray of grilled patties. A woman I didn’t know brought me a bag with more food wrapped in aluminum foil – “for Charlie.” Jacob informed me she was Sue Clearwater, Seth’s mother. Quil and Embry drew me into some pre-existing argument about a television show I hadn’t watched and tried to turn me against Jacob. Without knowing anything about it I stuck to Jacob’s side, until Quil managed to trick me into destroying my own argument, leading to Jacob and Seth repeatedly bonking me on the head with their pokers, chanting ‘Judas! Judas!’. I laughed until my stomach hurt.Once, I looked up to see Sam Uley looking at me. His eyes were tight and his mouth was set in a frown. I cringed away from our eye contact, then found that Eyebrows was also looking at me. I hid my face against Jacob’s shoulder. This set Quil and Embry off in another fit of giggles.Jacob must have been blocking the breeze from the ocean, though, because I got so hot sitting next to him that I had to take off my coat and jacket. Cue more laughter.I was comfortable and full, and the ambient sounds of laughter and talking and singing melded together in a blur.  One second, I was leaning against Jacob, watching the flames, his shoulder bumping up and down in time with his voice. The next, I was being shaken awake in the dark. There were less people around the fading fire, and the food table had been taken away. Seth and Billy had gone.“Did we bore you to death?” Jacob asked. Something about my face had Quil laughing. I rubbed my eyes.“What time is it?!”“Almost ten,” Embry said, laying back in the grass, flicking a lighter.“Shit,” I said, jumping up and patting my pockets. I had two missed calls from Charlie, even though I’d told him where I would be. “I didn’t mean to – I don’t think I can find my car!”“I’ll walk you,” Jacob said, standing and stretching.“See you, Bella!” Quil called, he and Embry waving at us.“What’s the hurry?” Jake asked. “Charlie have you on a curfew? Aren’t you, like, forty?”“He’s probably worried.” I wrapped my arms around myself, hurrying along in his wake. “I’m thirty-five, asshole.”He didn’t laugh. Only the faint light from the houses we were passing behind gave me light to see his solemn face by.“Was Paul at the bonfire?” I asked.“Yeah.”“Do you want to talk about it?” I prompted, knowing he had almost brought something up earlier. He had described Jared Cameron as one of his friends, the week before, and tonight they had not spoken at all. “Who is Sam Uley?”Jake’s eyebrows furrowed. I was shocked when his hand suddenly closed over mine, big and calloused. “Jared and Paul hang around him all the time now. I don’t get it. It’s fucking weird.”“How so?”He hesitated. “Sam’s older than us. Like, twenty-five. He went away for school for a few years, but last summer he came back. I don’t know him, but Billy had him over for dinner a couple of times, and he tried to…I don’t know. It was fucked.”“What did he do?” I asked, growing more concerned by the second.Jacob shook his head. “Last week, Jared didn’t come to school on Friday. Not that unusual, but then, on Saturday I heard Billy and Harry talking about the bait shop, so I know Jared didn’t go to work. I asked them, but they were really cagey about it all.”I didn’t know who Harry was, but I’d heard the name come up before. “I don’t understand.”“Well, the next few days I saw Jared with Sam, skulking around the woods. Paul too, of course – the same thing happened to him like, two weeks before that. With Paul it was – whatever. But Jared wasn’t answering our texts, then he wasn’t answering our phone calls. Embry went to his mom to try and figure shit out, but Tea acted like everything was fine. He’s been avoiding us. He’s never home…and it’s the same with Paul.”“Did they say what happened? Did you…fight?”Jacob shook his head. “Neither of them will talk to us.”“I thought you were really close.”“We were. It’s really fucked up. I think I said that already.” There was a pause. “Just…it happened basically overnight. One day, we’re fine, the next…He told me to leave him alone. He said I should stay as far away from him as possible. And it’s like he hates me, and I didn’t even do anything. It just makes me so mad.”His hand was shaking in mine. “Paul?” I asked hesitantly.“God,” Jacob said. We were almost back to his house now, and his hand was really shaking.“Well, maybe you should stay away from him,” I said. “He sounds like a dick.”“Paul is a dick,” he said. “That’s never surprised me. But Jared isn’t. Jared and Embry have been friends since they were born. He wouldn’t be doing this for nothing.”“What do you think it is?” I whispered.He let out a massive breath. The trees shook around us and I was numb with cold. Jacob spun to lean back against the cab of my truck. I took his other hand and waited, not understanding the fine tremors going through him. “My dad tried to get Sam to be – like a mentor or something. Not really my thing, but I still see Sam looking at me sometimes. Like he’s got some stupid cult going and I’m going to join it.”“Billy knows him? How could it be a cult if…?”“Billy’s no help.” Jacob snorted, “He just keeps saying some bullshit like ‘you’ll understand some day’. Like I’m about to go through puberty again.”“Your dad wouldn’t let anything happen to you,” I said, sure of at least that. “There has to be an explanation.”He wasn’t crying, or anything, but his hands were shaking almost violently. I threw my arms around him. “You can always come stay with me and Charlie. I need someone to help me with the laundry.”His arms crushed me to his chest and I was surrounded by warmth. He was laughing. “If this is how you react, I’ll freak out more often.”I felt the tremors slow, and then they stopped. “I’m sorry about your friends,” I said.“Sorry to whine so much.”“Jake,” I said, looking up at him. “Don’t apologize. You can tell me anything.”He rubbed his hands up my shoulders as though to warm me. “Yeah,” he said thoughtfully. “I know that.”“I really have to go,” I said. “I’ll text you when I get home.”“Alright.” He pushed off the truck and began ambling away backwards. “See ya. Thanks for coming.”“Bye, Jake.” I climbed into the cab, throwing my coat into the passenger side. I drove carefully through La Push, glancing around at the small houses. What was going on with Jacob’s friends? I doubted it was a cult, even if Jacob was clearly terrified. Jacob was Jacob. He wouldn’t do a thing he didn’t want to. Stubborn, like me.The cold had seeped into my bones, and I shivered the whole way home, despite the car heat on full blast. White light from the television shone through the living room curtains.“Hey, Dad,” I called, shutting the door and locking it behind me.He was standing in the kitchen, having heard my truck. “I called you,” he said, coming to watch me shuck my boots off. “I called you a few times, Bells.”There was an edge to his tone. “I fell asleep at the bonfire,” I explained. “Is something wrong?”He sighed gustily. “Well, I wanted make sure you and those boys weren’t fussing around in the woods.”Fussing? “The woods?” I asked. “I don’t…do that.”“We’ve got some distressing ranger reports from up at the Park earlier. Something…” He leaned against the doorjamb, watching me warily. “Something ripped some hikers apart.”I don’t know how he thought I would have reacted. Olympic National Park was pretty far, at least a forty-five minute drive inland. I hadn’t been there yet. “Oh, my God,” I said. “That’s terrible.”“Wouldn’t worry me, usually, except today someone saw something closer to town, in the woods off Elk Creek trail. Poor guys were scared out of their minds – I was at the station late taking down their reports.”“Are you talking about some kind of bear?”He shook his head. “I couldn’t get them to agree on anything specific. Just…big.”“Okay,” I said, thinking doesn’t this happen all the time up here? “I won’t go in the woods. Ever.”This seemed to satisfy him. He relaxed and moved to let me into the kitchen, inspecting the bags I’d brought home with leftovers. “You and Jake have fun? You two are getting pretty close, huh?”“Dad,” I said. “It’s really not like that.”“Sure, sure,” he said.________________ 
Edythe
Bella Swan talked to me. Granted, this was because she was forced to as Banner had given us another worksheet to do. Fertilization and pregnancy. Bella took it from the next table and passed the stack back, reading over it once before setting it between us on the blacktop. A murmur went up as our cohort puzzled over a lesson they had failed to study for.Bella surprised me by saying, “I didn’t do the readings.”For the first time since Saturday, I looked at her with my own eyes. It was a mistake. It was akin to staring at the sun. “Okay,” I said, and picked up my pencil. While I filled out the questions, she leaned in on an elbow and watched me.In some ways, it was like sitting near a fire. The heat crackled in waves and bursts as she breathed and moved. Her heart sped up without explanation at one point, and then slowed. Unintentionally, I had begun focusing every facet of my attention on her. It was simply the only thing I was capable of doing, whether she was near me or not. My world had narrowed down to one single point, and although there was one part of my mind – the one that used to be the majority – that was irritated at my lack of integrity, I simply couldn’t fight it.I no longer wanted to. That was the worst part.“What am I doing tonight?”Her voice was not unexpected: focused as I was, I could hear the wet parting of her lips and the internal thrumming of larynx that preceded speech. Her voice was of a higher pitch than mine, but she almost always spoke in an undertone, a hushed murmur that begged the listener to lean in.Her question, however, I did not expect. I looked at her and found a challenge in her eyes.“You’re going to Angela Weber’s house,” I said immediately, not meaning to flaunt but eager to please.Bella’s eyes widened, and her heart jolted. Perhaps she truly hadn’t believed me, but this arrangement had been organized through texts alone and neither she nor Angela had spoken about it at school. “I guess you’ve tired of Jessica?” I suggested, since she was pointedly not being invited.Bella shook her head, frowning. “What did I do last night?”This was less simple. Alice was watching Bella more often than not, but she had not told me about anything in particular Bella had done the day before. “You went to a bonfire,” I said. “I can smell it.”She immediately smelled her own jacket, then her hair. “I showered!”“I can smell that, too,” I said, filling out our worksheet automatically. “Was there anything else?”“Well, you must know what I’m doing tomorrow night.”Of course I did. Alice was rabid about it. “Yes,” I said.Alice could spend time with Bella, if she really wanted to. I couldn’t stop her, so there was little use getting worked up about it. I had noticed Alice always got what she wanted when I got worked up.“Why did she invite me?” Bella asked more quietly.I looked at her again, trying to see if the effect of looking at her could be mitigated by exposure. It was not. And I wasn’t alone in my rapture, either: Mike Newton watched Bella from the back of the room, covetously.“You already know her motivation,” I found myself saying, but I was stuck on Newton. Was I no better than him? Was my interest as entirely unwelcome? Bella was kind to him, even if she rejected his advances. “But it’s good you know to be cautious.”“Are you okay?” She asked. I saw that coming. I wanted to look as her as much as to not – I was coming off manic.I struck off the last question on the worksheet and pushed it back to her for review. She didn’t look down at the page, but her fingers began to worry at one corner. One wrong move and the pliant edge could go rigid, and cut into her skin as easily as a knife. Or a tooth. Then where would we be? Would any of this attempted friendship even matter? If she bled right in front of me, I would turn into an animal. That was a sad foundation for trust.“Wonderful,” I said. “Thank you.”I didn’t look at her again. Her mandible clenched down and her molars ground together between a set of sharp sighs and one sour, silent laugh. My chest became curiously tight, which could have no possible basis in biology because my body was frozen. It was dead.__________________It stormed that night, on one of the last warm days of the year. Clouds had gathered blackly during the last hour of school, and sitting in my Econ class I could hear Mike Newton worrying over Bella. He knew she hated the rain, and the snow, and he insisted on holding his umbrella over her head and running next to her to her car, all for the reward of her grateful smile and half-hug before she drove away.Rain surrounded our home in a blanket of white noise. After sunset the thunder began. I went into Carlisle’s study while everyone else was in the back field playing soccer in the mud, knocking quietly and waiting for him to bid me enter.Only his desk lamp was on, casting an orange glow over his wooden furniture and white armchairs. Hundreds of books lined the walls, and framed paintings and the miscellany of three hundred years of life.He still had on his glasses – an unnecessary but useful bit of costuming. A bound burgundy volume from his journals was open, on the subject of me.“Sorry,” he murmured, closing it. “Was I bothering you?”Carlisle’s memoirs were extensive. He wrote down everything. There were eighteen volumes on me alone. Esme had thirty-six. “My eating habits have never interested you before.”He pulled his glasses off and set them to the side. I went to the window next to his desk and sat on the wide sill, rain lashing against the glass. “Everything is of interest to me, when it comes to you all.”“It doesn’t bother me,” I told him, crossing my arms.Carlisle lifted a whisky glass. Its dark red contents were cold, and the smell elicited no hunger in me. I could make a crude guess as to what does, he thought.I whispered. With the rain, the thunder, Emmett’s shouting, no one would be able to overhear us. “I have been thinking about our visit to Italy.”This threw him into a befuddlement that lasted three seconds. “The execution.”When I was still new to this life, I had expressed my many doubts to Carlisle. About immortality, about our shared diet. My depression had been deep and dark. Carlisle’s answer to all of it was to introduce me to the Volturi.The Volturi were a coven that lived beneath the Italian city of Volterra. They were large, and the aged leaders that were its kings had spent centuries expanding their influence. If vampires had a central society, and if that society had a ruling body, it would be them.It was, according to the Volturi, the duty of a vampire who created another to bring them before the Volturi as a pilgrimage. Really, its leaders desired to meet every newly created vampire to gauge any special talent that may have presented itself. They had spent centuries gathering a retinue so powerful it could never be challenged.I immediately found them repulsive. They were ancient, their skin desiccated from centuries of sitting on their ridiculous thrones. Carlisle had been a curio to them with his non-traditional diet and impeccable self-control, and he remained on close terms with their leader. My gift for mind-reading was of fantastic interest to them, and if it weren’t for Aro himself having such a similar ability, I might not have been allowed to leave. They only sought power, and the single-minded focus was detestable to me.We had witnessed a rare execution during our short visit. Mates – a man and a woman. The Volturi loved exacting justice on vampiric wrongdoers. And they had every ability to do so.The accused had been breeding newborns in the aftermath of some war or another. Carlisle didn’t want to watch, but his fear of losing me trumped nearly everything else. He needed me to see, to fully understand the depths of barbarism.The man had been first. I heard his thoughts as he died, and it was horrible. What was even worse was the mind of the woman, who was like a wild animal at that point. She had slipped into a sort of insanity I didn’t like to think about. Vampires could not live without their mates, and I was only relieved that she didn’t have to live for long.“I should never have made you attend,” Carlisle said sadly. “I didn’t understand what you must have heard. Not until Esme.” You didn’t speak for two days after.“It scared me,” I told him, sliding to sit on the floor. “It scares me.”Which part? He asked, taking a sip of blood. It was cold. No one but Carlisle could stomach cold blood.I had hated watching Carlisle fall in love with Esme. “You give your mind away. Your autonomy. I don’t think it’s very practical to be besotted by someone else.”Carlisle smiled at me, with amusement and pride I felt was misplaced.“Please don’t,” I said.“We love much more strongly than humans,” he murmured. “That has always given me hope in us. And you…” have never had hope for your soul.I did not believe in souls. This was beside the point. “Does my acceptance of love not beg a second consideration?”“You cannot help who you love. That is the beauty of it.”I balked. “She is human, Carlisle. And my first thought toward her was murder. How could I love the same person I wanted to kill in cold blood?”She is your singer, Carlisle thought, that’s not exactly cold blood. “I know your heart.” You could love very capably. You could love without reserve.I covered my face with my hands. “That doesn’t make it right. That doesn’t justify it.”“You don’t need to justify your feelings, Edythe,” he said. “But if I understand correctly, Alice has foreseen – ““She’s foreseen that I end Bella’s life.”“It’s one possibility, yes,” he said easily. “You don’t know who decides that. And what I was referring to is the fact that this is a mutual companionship.”“Meaning?”“Meaning you are not the only one who gets to decide.”“It’s my responsibility.”“I would say it’s your responsibility to inform her of the risks. And then to not ever make a mistake you can’t apologize for.”If I thought about it for half a second, I knew I would be lost. “Could it possibly be worth it?”Carlisle looked at me hard, mouth thinning in pity. Yes, he thought with conviction. I have always told you it is.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Bella
Alice Cullen called me four times while I was doing my hair. I was informed brightly but ungently that none of the outfits I was going to choose were quite good enough, and didn’t I have anything black?“No, I don’t have anything black,” I said, finally losing my patience. “It’s not a funeral!”“Are we really, as a culture,” Alice bemoaned, “going to deprive ourselves of the full color spectrum just because some colors have archaic connotations? I don’t suppose you reserve green outfits for arbor day?”“Um,” I said, startled. “I’ll keep looking.”I felt only a little bad for hanging up on her after the fifth call.I refused to believe it could be that serious. I was going to wear the same blue dress I always wore to formal events. Or, more accurately, event. Renée and Phil’s wedding was the last formal anything I had attended. It was navy blue, it made my boobs almost look good, with the right bra, and it had pockets. I pinned my hair up in a bun, then when Alice didn’t call I second guessed myself and took it down again, taking the curling iron to it.The makeup started to feel like overkill. Next to Alice, my appearance amounted to a garbage bag wearing lipstick.My music was again interrupted as my phone buzzed.“I’m wearing it,” I said.Alice made a sound like eugh. Then, “We’ll be there in fifteen minutes.”“We? Who’s we?” She had said it would just be me and her.“Oh, there was a change of plans. Everyone’s coming. See you soon!”“Wait!” I cried. Alice hung up. When I called her back there was no answer. My self-confidence plummeted at the thought of seeing the blonde sister – Rosalie.“Wow!” Charlie said when I descended the stairs. “Whoa now!”“Stop,” I said, laughing. “And speak for yourself!”“This old thing?” He said, pulling at the collar of his suit. I had been surprised he would so willingly dress up like this – he claimed he was going for the open bar, but I thought it was more about getting to gossip with his deputies off the clock. According to Jacob, Charlie and Billy held down a monopoly on gossip between Forks and La Push. I wondered if they’d heard the one about the human girl and the vampires.“You sure you don’t need a ride?” He asked, checking his watch. “I said I’d be there at seven.”“I’ll wait on Alice,” I said.He left, and I stood puttering around the kitchen until a car pulled into the drive. It was the silver one – the Volvo. I froze in place until I could see that it was Alice behind the wheel. The backseat, I couldn’t see.“You look amazing!” Alice cried as I opened the passenger door.“That’s not what you said earlier.”She waved a dismissive hand. “Get in! Have you met Jasper?”I would have to look in the backseat now. My hand twitched toward my phone, a movement Alice observed shrewdly. Maybe Charlie would come back and get me.“Nice to meet you,” said a deep voice. A male voice. I looked, and I was proud of myself for doing it. Because she was back there, too. Jasper’s eyes were just as golden as Edythe’s, but much easier to look at. He inclined his head with a smile, and the tiniest bit of my anxiety seemed to ebb away.“You, too,” I said, turning back around to buckle my seatbelt. The car had yet to move, and Alice was smiling in a kind of scary way.“Don’t be rude,” she said to the rear-view mirror. “Say hi to Bella.”I tried my best to sink into the car seat.“Hey,” Edythe said flatly.Alice looked at me.“Hey,” I answered to the windshield, trying to sound nonchalant.“Wow,” Alice said brightly, putting the car in reverse. “Isn’t it so nice how we all get along?”She monologued through the entirety of the short ride. I couldn’t tell if she was uncomfortable, or if she was purposely trying to make everyone else uncomfortable. I could hardly keep up, as she was talking so fast, but mostly I was just hyper-aware of the person sitting behind me. Neither Jasper nor Edythe ever added anything to the one-sided conversation.The hospital’s parking lot was nearly full. People, mostly older people but I saw my Spanish teacher among them, walked in pairs or groups toward the hospital, all dressed to the nines. This was probably the only formal event Forks ever had. Besides prom, maybe, but I didn't see any hot pink ball gowns.Alice was out of the car and at my side disturbingly fast, winding a freezing arm through mine to pull me toward the red convertible parked across the row, by which were standing Emmett and, yikes, Rosalie Cullen.“You said it was just going to be us,” I hissed, bending toward her ear. Alice patted my arm with a feather-light touch.“Bella, this is Emmett and Rosalie. Em, Rose, this is Bella Swan.”“You’re even shorter up close,” Emmett said, with a goofy smile. I smiled back, oddly reminded of Jacob.“Hello,” said Rosalie. I didn’t like looking at her at all. She was too…perfect didn’t even describe it. She was elegant. She could post one picture and break Instagram. Her hair was pulled back on top, falling all around her face in blonde wisps that effortlessly achieved the same thing I had tried with my stupid bun. Her maroon dress was long, slitted, and the same color as her lipstick. I felt like a kindergartener.“Hi,” I said awkwardly. “Shall we go?” Jasper asked, taking Alice’s other arm and pulling her off of me. I followed close behind them, doing my best to ignore Edythe behind me.The hospital wasn’t very big, as I had seen before. There was a small exterior addition that housed a recreational area – today a reception hall. The hospital-blue walls were covered with black curtains woven with sparkling tea lights. Alice and Jasper released each other as we entered the front doors. She turned and grinned at me. “I designed it. Esme did catering.”Low, cloth-covered tables were loaded with towers of hors d’oeuvres and ornate plastic glasses. A very uncharitable part of me thought it was chintzy – but that wasn’t quite fair. The effort was wholehearted and with everyone all dressed up I almost forgot I was in a rec center. The lights were low enough that the Cullens garnered only a few stares.I stuck behind Alice – who made me feel tall for the first time in my life – as she darted through the crowd to an unoccupied corner behind a table laden with reserve glasses.“This is busier than the last one,” Rosalie said. I put my back to the wall and crossed my arms, trying to guard myself against all those yellow eyes at once. And they were all looking at me, each looking away as I noticed. Even Edythe.“Carlisle’s drawing some attention from Seattle,” Edythe murmured. Her eyes had moved from me to the floor, going unfocused in a way I was starting to recognize. “U Wash Medical Center is making their bid.”While she was distracted reading minds, I risked a moment of staring. Her dress spanned from her neck to the floor, making her seem even taller and more imposing than usual. It was black (Alice’s meddling with my choice of wardrobe now made horrible sense), with long sleeves and a collar that went up her throat. The fabric clung to her form, and for some unrelated reason sweat broke out on the back of my neck.“Do you get to Seattle often?” Alice asked me brightly.I had been to the Space Needle and the gum wall, both about a decade ago. “No,” I said. “Not really.”Alice wrinkled her nose like I had said exactly the wrong thing.“Bella,” Emmett said next. He hadn’t really stopped grinning yet. “What’s your stance on Jeeps?”“Like, the car?” I wasn’t really sure how to answer. This was more of a Jacob question. “They’re pretty cool, I guess.”“That’s so funny, ‘cause Edythe,” he pointed, like Edythe wasn’t literally right next to me. “Also thinks Jeeps are cool.”Edythe was giving him a look that promised death. Rosalie muttered something I couldn’t hear and Jasper suppressed a smile. They were all definitely making fun of me, I just couldn’t figure out what the angle was.Edythe looked to Alice and seemed to wince. Alice spoke – I swear she did, but I couldn’t make a word out. As if on cue Emmett straightened and took Rosalie by the hand. “Want to go see if the bartender will serve us?”“Yep,” she said.Our circle closed as they left it. “I bet he’s serving drinks by the end of the night,” Jasper said.“Twenty,” Edythe said, still looking at the floor. Alice clucked her tongue.“I’m going to network,” she said. “Who’s my lead?”Edythe gave her a begrudging frown. “Figure it out.”“I will!” Alice promised, striding into the thick of the crowd. Jasper followed her.“Alice said you weren’t coming,” I said immediately. Edythe didn’t even look up when I spoke. “Or I – I wouldn’t have.”“I knew you’d be here, and I still came,” she said. “Let’s call it even.”Alice had completely disappeared from sight so I had nowhere else to go – unless I wanted to bother Charlie, who from the looks of it was having a dandy time on his own.He was across the room, by the bar, surrounded by deputies, holding a faux-crystal glass of what I would bet was Miller Lite. He appeared to be telling a story, waving his arms around and grinning while the other men laughed uproariously.“Can you hear that?” I asked. Edythe looked at me, then followed my gaze.“He’s telling them about catching some teenagers in a car a few days ago,” Edythe said, turning toward them and stepping back toward me. “They were smoking pot. He…confiscated it.”“Is it that funny?” I never saw him so animated. “They’re eating it up.”“Well,” Edythe said, “It is crime.”I watched my father throw his head back and laugh, and he looked a hundred years younger. My stomach fell.“Yo,” Emmett Cullen said in my ear. He’d snuck up on my blind side, and I jumped. “Loosen up,” he said, pushing a glass into my hand. “And don’t tell your dad.”He walked off overly-casually, one hand in his pocket and the other with his own glass. I lifted mine and took a hesitant sip. Champagne, sweet and bubbly. Edythe watched me with trepidation.“Do you…drink alcohol?” I asked cautiously.“No. Emmett just likes seeing how far he can push it.”I took another sip. She frowned at me. “So,” I said. “Did Alice blackmail you or something?”“Not as such. I was afraid my siblings would ply you with alcohol and make you donate your entire bank account to the hospital.”“Oh, very funny,” I muttered, looking down into my champagne.“It’s not.” She leaned against the wall next to me, looking like Morticia Addams’s redheaded sister. “It would absolutely have worked.”“Would it?”“I can smell the alcohol in your blood already. You haven’t eaten since lunch.”My stomach growled, and the blush I had been dreading spread over my face. “I’ve had, like, three sips.”A smile played around the edges of her mouth. I couldn’t tell if she was teasing me, I just knew it was working. “You can’t smell my blood,” I said, more hopeful than anything.“Swan,” Edythe said, leaning toward me for emphasis. “It is your defining characteristic.”I was blushing so hard my head was starting to ache. “Well, I guess you can decide when I’m cut off.”She watched impassively as I downed the rest of the champagne. “Don’t count on it.”“What did Alice mean about a lead?”I wasn’t trying to be annoying with all my questions, but I knew from experience that Edythe wouldn’t be offering any conversation unless forced. At least she didn’t look annoyed. She turned and craned her neck, then gestured me closer to her and pointed.Alice was deep in conversation with a tall, grey-haired woman in a black pantsuit. The contrast between them was almost comical. Alice’s bright youth stood out even more than usual, and even with her heels she was so tiny. Jasper stood next to her like a young, blonde James Dean.“Alice knew her name from a client list,” Edythe said. I looked at her in interest, more at the way her face changed when she was reading minds than in what she was saying. “She sends her designs to a boutique in Los Angeles. She’s about to land herself a new job.”“Designs? Like…clothes?” I looked at Alice’s dress. It was very short, hanging down her frame without curves, like something I would have dressed a doll with when I was a child. The fabric sort of poofed out, meeting the thigh-high black stockings that led to platform heels. It seemed ridiculous before, but it wasn’t like I kept up with high fashion.“Dresses. Couture, mostly.”“That sounds…very cool. It explains a lot.”The empty flute of champagne disappeared from my hands. I flinched, thinking I had dropped it somehow. There was no crash. Edythe didn’t appear to have moved, but the empty glass was nowhere in sight.“Bella, there you are,” Charlie called. Charlie, coming up to us with the Doctor. “You remember Dr. Cullen?”I smiled. Dr. Cullen looked exactly as insanely handsome as I remembered, dressed in a spotless pale gray suit. The only difference was the woman on his arm. She was clearly one of them, though her eyes were so dark they looked more brown than gold. She was of an age with Dr. Cullen – whatever age that might be. Her honey brown hair was cut short around her chin and hung in delicate curls around a heart-shaped face.“It’s nice to see you again, Bella,” Dr. Cullen said. “This is my wife, Esme.”“You look lovely,” she said very earnestly, holding out her hand. The icy cold grip was exactly what I expected. “It’s a joy to finally meet you.”“Thank you. So do you.”“Edythe,” Charlie nodded at her. “Thanks again for taking Bella out. I’m glad she’s making such good friends so fast.”I opened my mouth to tell Charlie not to thank people for being friends with me, but Edythe spoke first, saying: “She’s very easy to get along with.”I looked at her in flat disbelief. Edythe was gone. In her place was a creature infinitely more feminine and congenial. Her voice was doing that pitch thing again. And her spine curved in some feline slink instead of her usual slouch. I almost asked Dr. Cullen to treat me for a stroke.Someone called Charlie’s name, waving from a group of people that, if I had to guess, looked like lawyers. “Carlisle,” Charlie said, waving back. “Have you met Adam Charles? I’ll introduce you.”“Ladies.” Dr. Cullen gave Edythe a sort of look before sweeping himself and his wife away after Charlie.“I’m easy to get along with?” I said right away, unable to not laugh.Edythe slumped back against the wall, the magic aura fading away like the mirage it was. “At the very least, I can’t hear all the horrible things you’re thinking about me.”“I’m not – ““Psst,” Emmett Cullen said, banging into me. I fell into Edythe, which hurt.“Emmett,” Edythe said sharply.“Sorry, I was trying to be casual.” He said to me, cordially: “Break anything?”“Not yet,” Edythe answered for me.“I’m fine,” I said, face settling into a permanent state of burn. Emmett held out two cups.“Jack and Coke or lager?”I wanted neither, but I definitely did not want lager. I took the coke, and Emmett grinned his approval.I took an experimental sip. It was very, very strong. More Jack than Coke, even. Emmett laughed, deep and loud, when I coughed.“He brought a flask,” Edythe said when he darted off again.“No kidding.” I looked away from her eyes, taking another compulsive sip. If she kept looking at me all night, I was going to black out. “So…vampires can’t get drunk? Eternity must get pretty boring.”“I don’t know, hunting is sort of a high.” She said it so normally.“Rabbits? Or do you fish?”“I prefer mountain lions.” She frowned like I had insulted her. “What about you?”I thought about it. “Chicken?”She stared at me for a very long moment. “What do you like to drink?”“Oh.” I looked down into my cup. I had been to a few parties back in Phoenix, but I didn’t have many friends to drink with, or to buy me alcohol. “Sometimes I drink wine with my mom?”“Do you like it?” Edythe asked.“I guess, yeah.”She frowned. “Are you going to eat anything?”“No,” I said, taking another sip of coke, watching her eyes narrow.“The ceremony is starting soon,” she said, and Alice was there to almost finish her sentence, saying: “And I’ve saved us seats. Bella?”I let her wind her arm through mine and we walked with the tide of the crowd toward the adjacent room. A bunch of chairs were set up in rows, and a spotlight up in a loft was shining on a stage. Carlisle Cullen was standing off to the side of it, holding a stack of notecards and talking to someone. I saw Charlie sitting in the second row.Alice pulled me down the last row and sat me at the end, then shamelessly sat one seat over. There was perfectly one seat left for Edythe to sit in, right next to me. I was reminded of the concert, except this was much less comfortable. There was a whispered conversation to my left. I saw Emmett trying to pass something my way – another glass.“Is that for me?” I asked. Edythe crossed her arms and just looked at me. I leaned around her, trading Emmett my empty glass (when had that happened?) for a new one. “So, um, I think I have a lead. For you.”“What?” Edythe asked.“Well, just in case you get hungry.”“Be less of a lightweight,” she said. “What are you talking about?”I took another drink just to spite her. “There’s a giant animal running around Forks.”Edythe went still and frowned intently at me. Alice and Emmett both looked, too.“There’s a what?” Edythe said, but I had lost my nerve. And Doctor Cullen was up on stage tapping the mike and saying, “Can everyone hear me?”I settled in to listen, feeling buzzy. Maybe I was a lightweight. I could barely pay attention to anything Edythe’s dad was talking about. It was boring. He thanked all of the town’s donors, and the Rotary and the Chamber and the Hospital Board. There were smatterings of applause and different white men took turns standing – including my father, who was the only one I clapped for.When they started bringing the white men on stage, each giving his own little speech on the performance of the hospital over the past year, I knew I was flagging. The buzzing in my head was only getting stronger, and my drink had run empty.Being very casual about it all, I stood and took the five steps to the door that led back to the reception room. The doors were propped open, so the catering crew were very quietly replacing the depleted stores of food and the bartender was putting out clean glasses. I walked up to him and set my drink down. I hadn’t seen him before – Emmett had intervened. He was older, with thoroughly peppered dark hair and glasses.“Can I get a refill?” I asked. He threw a towel over his shoulder and crossed over to me, a playful smirk casting a ribbon of lines over his face. He was handsome. “Jack and Coke?”“Ah,” he said. “You must be with the Jokester.”I laughed, knowing he meant Emmett.“I’ve only got wine and beer, I’m afraid,” he said. He looked at me strangely. “Can I see your –?““She’s eighteen,” Edythe said beside me. I looked up and hissed, “traitor,” but she only rolled her eyes and leaned forward, flashing her big yellow eyes at the guy. “But I’ll have a grigio.”He hesitated, looking between us, maybe about to card her, but I saw when he became dazzled by her and relented. I was familiar with the feeling.She held the glass in her palm and motioned with her head. “Walk with me.”She led me out back into the hallway that would take us to the hospital proper. It was darkened, like all the sick people had agreed to shut it down for the reception. When we were out of view of the caterers, she handed me the glass. I touched her cold fingers with mine and blushed.“I’m the only kid here,” I said. Edythe, who had been speaking at the same time, closed her mouth and looked irritated at me. “Why?”“Alice thought it would be fun.”I laughed without humor. “You are a hundred years old.”“Are you trying to make a point?”At the end of the hall, I checked around the corner. The reception desk was empty, all the lights shut off. “Does she do this often? Force people to be friends?”“No,” Edythe said.“How does that work? Isn’t it…sad?”“Is what sad?”I looked at her. “Having human friends.”“I’ve never had a human friend,” Edythe said, half-shadowed. “I imagine it would be very – sad. Swan, I need to ask you about – “I moved, walking backwards, tasting the sweet wine and watching her. “So why me?” I asked. “I must be…like a child to you. I must come off like a total idiot.”“I don’t think you’re an idiot,” she said. “And I don’t think you’re a child.”“One. Hundred. Years.”“I’m nineteen,” she said, rolling her eyes again, following me. “I’m nineteen forever. I’m not getting anything but wiser, and really not even that.”“Then why can’t we be friends?” I asked, and the regret came so fast and hard I could have died. “I – I mean – ““You said there was an animal,” Edythe said, moving again. I was a long way ahead of her, but she was fast, almost caught up again. “What animal?”I sighed. “Some giant bear killed some hikers in the Park. Charlie told me about it.”“The Park?”“But some other hiker saw it closer to Forks. Like a bear, or something.”“Or something?” Edythe questioned, closing the distance between us. I realized I had stopped walking, then realized there was a wall behind my back again. I pushed open a door that said stairs. “There was a police report? When?”“This week, I guess.” I climbed with one hand firmly on the banister. Edythe made no noise behind me. “Is that what you do? Like hunting, only you eat them raw?”“Where exactly are you going?”“I have no idea.”“Swan.”I turned around – carefully – and looked at her. “Yes?”“We should go back.”“No, thanks,” I said. I didn’t want to see Charlie yukking it up again with his friends. It was unsettling at best and insulting at second-best. “It’s very boring.”“Yes,” Edythe said in agreement. “Do…you want me to take you home?”“I –” Her question brought me up short. “I just can’t sit still.”“Because you’re drunk.”I couldn’t argue with that. “That might have something to do with it.”She nodded. “Excess energy can be remedied. Come with me.”She held out a hand. I took it, elated beyond reason, and let her lead me up the stairs and to the door. “Wait,” she said to me, frowning at the door and going empty-eyed. Her hand was lax around mine, cold as ice and long-fingered.“What do you hear?”“Two nurses doing rounds. This is the cardiology wing. A very insensitive place to be stumbling around drunk.”“Right,” I said. I finished off the wine, underestimating how much was left and having to consume three large gulps, which was probably unwise. Edythe gave me a funny look and pulled the door open. Her hand remained wrapped around mine. I was vaguely aware that I was smiling like a big fucking idiot. An electric pulse beat through my arm.“I’ve always wanted an MRI,” I said as she pulled us through a well-lit hallway. She was staying close to the wall, sneaking while walking tall.“Well, that’s not where we’re going.”“Have you been to medical school?” I asked. If she said yes I would probably die. “How many times have you even been to high school, anyway? Why do you do it?”“I’ve been to high school three times,” she said over her shoulder, moving around a housekeeping-type cart.“Oh, my God. The horror.”“When I was born, public school had dunce caps and segregation. If I didn’t reacquaint myself with people my age every few decades I wouldn’t be able to act human.”“Okay, I’ll give you that,” I said dubiously. I peered into the empty rooms as we passed them. “Do you stay young because you suck the life from living organisms?”She glanced over her shoulder, the faintest of smiles on her lips. “Is this a theory?”I nodded.“No,” she said.“Your thoughts on garlic?”Edythe stopped and ducked into a darkened patient room. I was pulled in with her, and she held a finger to her lips, closing the door just enough to shield us from the person that passed pushing a wheeled garbage bin. It was too fast for me – I gripped her forearm for balance and stifled my giggles. She was like an iron rod buried in concrete – there was zero give to her arm or her balance as I leaned hard on her. The giggles increased.“I can see your research of the Wikipedia page for vampire has been thorough,” she whispered, pulling me back into the hall and around a corner. “But that’s all too literary. It doesn’t apply.”“So what are the rules?” I asked. “How do I kill –” I had to cut myself off, and Edythe looked back at me with a wide smirk. “That sounded worse than I meant it.”“In here.” She held open the door to another stairwell. “Go down.”I was kind of forced to let go of her hand, and I was sure I did so too slowly. “I just meant, like, in a movie there are rules. Like in that one with Tom Cruise they couldn’t kill him because of –”“Hurry up,” she snapped.Going down the stairs was decidedly worse than going up. It was especially disorienting when Edythe was waiting for me at the bottom and I hadn’t even seen her pass me. She ushered me through a door and I was paralyzed by freezing night air. “I didn’t want to go outside,” I said. We were at a side door, facing a concrete pathway lined with grass on one side, and trees on the other, one long and windowless stretch of hospital wing hiding us from the street. “It’s freezing!”Edythe kicked a rock into place to keep the door from shutting. “You need to sober up.”“You need to not be such a buzzkill.” I walked in a careful circle, trying to work out the dizziness, maybe generate some warmth. “I’m sure there’s a rabbit around here somewhere. Are you hungry?”“I don’t eat rabbits,” she said.I crossed my arms and looked at her. “Something else, then. A small, defenseless creature.”“Like what?” Her face was scarily blank. “Like you?”I shrugged, trying to match her expression. I was morbidly curious about her diet, and she didn’t seem interested in talking about it, always changing the subject or ignoring me. This increased the curiosity about ten-fold.“You’re here,” she said, stepping forward. “Alone. With me. Doesn’t that scare you?”If only she could hear my thoughts. “I have no reason to be scared.”“How can you say that?”She suddenly looked very distraught. I answered without thinking. “You saved my life. I trust you.”“That’s not smart.” She said, advancing on me. I realized I had been backing away from her. I stopped. “You know what I…am.”“I’m being very serious,” I said, closing my eyes. “Go on, read my mind.”“If I could read your mind, I wouldn’t have to talk to you.”“That’s rude,” I said. “I have to believe you kind of like talking to me.” Something in the back of my mind was telling me to stop talking. It had been a while since I’d abused alcohol this way. I forgot how good you felt and how fun it was to do stupid things. “Considering the fact that this is our second date.”A pause. “Following you around a hospital to make sure you don’t kill yourself isn’t my idea of a date,” Edythe said. Her voice was much closer than I expected. My eyes flew open and she was right in front of me. The buzzing was getting very hard to ignore. My knees felt weak. I couldn’t catch my breath. Edythe’s eyes moved over my face, her expression slowly morphing into a frown.“I have a question,” she said. “About your friend, Jacob Black.”This was not really what I had expected, or wanted, her to say. “Um…” I started, confused. My throat closed like something was stuck in it. Edythe, watching me way too intently, realized before I did.“You’re going to throw up,” she said.I clapped a hand over my mouth. Yes. Yes, I was. The buzzing, through layers and layers of alcohol, was starting to feel more like nausea. I barely had the wherewithal to pull my dress up to my knees before I collapsed into the grass next to the pathway. Retching in front of Edythe Cullen was – or was going to be, when I was sober – the most humiliating moment of my entire life. I was grateful I hadn’t eaten anything. The bile was clear, but the volume of it surprised me. I hadn’t had that much, had I?Finally, it ended, and I wished I was dead. “Ow,” I said reflexively – my head was pounding – as I wiped my mouth and then wiped my hands on the grass.“Are you…okay?” Edythe asked, and her voice was thick with emotion – I turned and saw that emotion was laughter. She covered her mouth with her hands and laughed.“You’re laughing,” I said numbly, dazed. “Or I’m hallucinating.”Edythe lowered her hands. “Still criticizing me, too? You are stubborn.” When I tried to stand, she lunged forward and took me by the hand. Her speed didn’t make me less dizzy, nor did the quickness with which I was pulled back on to the cement.“I gotta go,” I said, trying to pull my hand away. She didn’t let me go. “I have to go – drown myself – ““You’re certainly cut off now, by the way,” Edythe said. She was smiling, then I closed my eyes because she was too beautiful and it was confusing. “But there’s no need for suicide.”“Oh, my God,” I said, pulling again. There was an answering pressure on my wrist. I was pulled inexorably in the direction I was trying to escape.“It’s seriously fine,” Edythe said. “Probably for the best. Your doctor isn’t available to pump your stomach.”“Shut up,” I said. But her voice was warm. I could feel her breath on my ear, and, lastly, I realized that she had pulled me into her. I was holding onto her, and it was her shoulder pressed into my forehead. I had thought it was the wall, but it was breathing. None of this was half as startling as feeling one hand sitting at my waist.My brain shut down, rebooted still drunk. I must have grabbed onto her. That made much more sense than the alternative.“I don’t think you should go back inside,” Edythe said, still casual, like we weren’t holding each other. “I’ll take you home.”“I need a minute,” I said. “Cold.”“Bella?”I turned my numb face into the region of her neck. My breath into the cloth of her dress collar created temporary warmth.“Swan,” I murmured.“What?”“You always call me Swan. Never Bella.”It felt like it was quiet for a long time, but I couldn’t tell seconds from minutes anymore. It was all spinny and fun and going numb. “How very rude of me,” she whispered. I thought I felt a hand brush my back.Then I was horizontal. It didn’t sicken me, but the spinny feeling made me laugh. I opened my eyes. “Are you carrying me?”“You didn’t give me much choice,” she said, looking determinedly forward. I marveled at her strength, again. The next time I opened my eyes, I was being pulled from the backseat of the silver car. She carried me again, bridal style, stopping at the front door of my house.“Key?”“My pocket.”Somehow, she retrieved the key and unlocked the door without dropping me on my head. It was warm in the house. I was shivering. Edythe put me down, keeping a hand on my shoulder to steady me. “Go to bed.”“Okay,” I breathed, smiling at her. She sighed and steered me toward the staircase.“Help me take my dress off?” I asked, reaching feebly for the zipper.“No.” She stood by the door of my bedroom, watching me struggle. “I’m leaving now.”“Don’t go!” I didn’t want her to. I wanted her to put her hands on my waist again. “What if I throw up again?”“Then you’ll have a lot to explain to your dad.”“Fine,” I said, falling across the bed and sinking into it with a sigh.Capable hands eased my shoes off. The blankets were pulled out from under me, then thrown on top, heavy and warm. As I careened toward unconsciousness, I heard Edythe say something, distant and quiet.“Tell me about Jacob Black,” she said again. “Do you know?” “Jacob,” I whispered back. “He’s my best…friend…”Silence. With monumental effort, I peeled my eyes open. Edythe was gone.______________________________
Edythe

I had to hunt after that. Call it – energy. That was the safest term for it. I was filled with energy.I tended to stay far away from drunk humans – in fact, I hadn’t been near one in almost five years. They smelled sour, they sweat, their stomachs churned in upset. Their thoughts were obnoxious and their spoken words were slurred.Of course Bella Swan was different in this way, too. Alcohol made her smile, and laugh, and something about it had made her eyes linger on me in a way I felt overly and painfully aware of. She pranced through the dark hallways in blue skirts, Titania beckoning her Oberon. And I was helpless, truly helpless because beneath her smile and her teasing there was a heart that raced, young and strong and true, and blood that was singing for me only.I ripped into a mule buck, blood gushing between my teeth and down my front. I could drink without spilling a drop, but this felt more right. I needed to remind my body what it was made for. Violence, gluttony, parasitism. The deer was no heavier than a human girl, its hooves kicked with no more force, and its heart beat a similar pace. It didn’t blush or tell me it trusted me, and in that way the deer was smarter. It just fought, until it couldn’t, and I left it on the forest floor for some hungrier scavenger to find.Alice screamed when I entered the house. “That is cashmere!”“Just blood?” Emmet examined me from the couch, sighing at the bloodstain across my chest. “I was hoping she puked on you. Me and Jazz were laughing our asses off.”Jasper was in his room, reading. The socializing had exhausted him. I looked at the knife in Alice’s hand.“You’re cooking,” I noted. Alice flitted back into the kitchen as I approached, joining Esme, Rosalie and Carlisle behind the island.They were a picture of teamwork. Carlisle stood at the stovetop, stirring a pot of liquid precisely counterclockwise while Esme consulted a thick recipe book. Alice joined Rosalie at the pile of carrots and onions waiting to be chopped.We kept our kitchen in working order – Esme baked and was quite good at it according to the humans. But this wasn’t for some town hall meeting or church potluck.Two cups diced…Rosalie set down her phone and grabbed an onion from one of the shopping bags, peeling it and going at it with the knife with a lot of confidence for someone who had not cooked in at least three decades.“Rosalie!” Alice snapped. “You’re supposed to be dicing!”“Yeah?” Rosalie stopped her violent chopping. “I’m dicing!”“You’re mincing.” Alice pulled out a second onion, taking the knife from Rosalie. “Thank God I thought to get extras.”“You can’t be serious,” I said. Rosalie, cooking. For Bella. “You think she’ll want soup?”“Chicken and rice,” Esme said, smiling. I bit back my next comment. Esme was already planning the wedding. Oh, no. I felt my chances at resisting my fate grow even slimmer – I could fend off Alice, but now Esme thought… “She did say she likes chicken.”“If you touch anything without washing your hands,” Alice pointed the knife in my direction. “You will lose four years of hair growth. I mean, you’re just unsanitary.”“Just let me try again,” Rosalie said, pulling out another onion. I zeroed in on her thoughts, ready to jump on her for making fun of the situation. She was purposefully not thinking about me, or Bella.“Go shower,” Esme said, flipping a page. Carlisle glanced at me and raised his eyebrows. “You can come help us after.”Stomach pump wouldn’t have been necessary, Carlisle thought. If that’s any consolation.It was. I climbed the steps, careful not to touch anything. We were conscious of the blood, the wildlife, and we cleaned constantly. Still, I didn’t want any stray animal germs lying around if Bella ever…I shut the bathroom door and dropped the dress into the trash can, then poured a helping of bleach over it. The water ran, slowly warming up while I stared at myself in the mirror.My naked form was familiar and strange. I couldn’t remember the last time I had given it more than a passing glance, and I barely understood why I was doing so now. The venom had frozen me, more or less, as I was at the time I was bitten. It had also changed me. It had filled me out where I was thin and frail with sickness, covering my bones with a layer of muscle and fat it recognized from my life of labor so I was not so spectral. My skin was the same color, though it reflected light instead of absorbing it. My eyes were the wrong color. Red, then yellow. I was not sure someone who knew me in life would recognize me now.The shaving of body hair had been after my time. I still grew hair, but it was different. Stronger and slower to grow. There had once been a marked line where the hair I had as a human was growing out, replaced by whatever cocktail of venom and keratin was in my head now. The hue was paler before, the hair frizzing and thin. What grew from me after my death was thick, titian and stronger than catgut. Rosalie was the one who discovered that very hard, very sharp rocks could do a passable job of scraping hair from our indestructible skin. She had a slab of diamond in her room for the very purpose of shaving her legs. I didn’t bother with that.I was tall for a girl, especially in my time. My hips were a little too wide, Alice said my shoulders were too broad to be a model form, and I was glad for these imperfections. I was glad for all of my imperfections. Beneath the veneer of absolute stillness and reflective skin that all vampires shared, I really wasn’t very beautiful. Humans thought that I was, but their eyes were weak, senses easily confused by my eyes, my skin, my voice. Things specifically designed to draw them in, create a false sense of security.When fog obscured my reflection, I stepped into the shower. I didn’t need the water to be hot. It felt the same to me as cold water, as ice. But I knew it would warm my skin, and I wanted to be warm. I’d never thought much about it before. Temperature was objective; I knew it without experiencing it. Also objective was my appearance…but I stood in the shower and thought about myself, my body. Water fell over my skin in a steaming cascade. Not nearly as warm as Bella. That warmth, I could feel. That warmth could burn me alive.She had not touched me, but it was close. I could still feel where her mouth had pressed into the fabric of my dress. I traced the spot with one hand and moved the other over my hip. I felt normal. I felt warm. But that wasn’t what she felt when she touched me. To her, I was ice and stone. I would never be able to keep her warm.I wanted Bella to think I was beautiful. It was the weakest, most vulnerable thought I had ever allowed myself. I cast it away as soon as it materialized, sighing. Sometimes I really hated reading minds, but just as often I was thankful to be the only one. The humiliation was intense, but at least I was my only audience.I rejoined Emmett on the couch, pulling the controller from his hands. “Let’s play the horse one.”“Red Dead? I think Carlisle was playing that.”“He was,” Carlisle said from the other room.“The space one, then,” I said.“You know the name,” Emmett muttered, putting in the Dead Space disc.“You could come help us,” Rosalie said. “It’s your girlfriend.”My stomach lurched at the word – childish. Emmett and I took turns shooting down aliens for a while, the house slowly filling with the savory smell of food. It wasn’t at all enticing, though I could pick out distinct ingredients. Odd that it would still smell the same to us, even as it turned to dust in our mouths.Jasper came down after a while, when the soup was simmering and they were all baking bread together, watching it rise in the oven like mad scientists. I realized, as he sat next to me, that he hadn’t been overwhelmed by the benefit crowd. He was overwhelmed by me.Jasper was probably the only one who wouldn’t make fun of me for my feelings. I didn’t have to pretend with him. I leaned back on the couch, facing him, waiting. He was thinking about Alice, and how it had felt to fall for her. Then he thought, with a great sense of anticipation, brace yourself.He reached out and touched my bare arm. I didn’t know what I was preparing for – until it hit. Suddenly, I was not in my body. I was in a storm, overcome with desire, empathy, protection, selflessness – primary colors shot through with bursts of pain and ego and some more divine agony I could not understand.It was blinding. I couldn’t think around it. Jasper pulled his hand away before I could react or flinch back. That’s Alice, he thought. That’s Alice, to me. That’s my love for her.I blinked at him, astonished. He had never done that, before – I didn’t know he could do that. His powers had always been limited to vague influence and intuition. He must have been sitting on it for a while, I was impressed with his control.He looked smug, a little bit. I stood and went out to the back porch, forcing my breaths to remain even. He had withdrawn the emotions, but not their effect. I felt too big inside my body, and I felt an absence at my side where I would prefer a particular human to be standing.I was in love.One thing to suspect or dread it, quite another to be shown so assuredly by someone who knew what they were talking about. If I was in love with a human, with Bella Swan, what did that make me? Did I even care?Sometime later, Carlisle joined me silently, his thoughts turned studiously to work. He laid a journal flat on the back of a chair and took notes at intervals. Alice and Jasper were in bed together watching a movie, texting back and forth about their days. I felt echoes of his love like shockwaves.“She doesn’t know about the wolves,” I said over my shoulder. “At least, not Jacob Black.”Are you certain? He asked.“Yes.” I could have asked her anything, and she would have answered. What a wasted opportunity, in retrospect. “Did you hear what she said about the bear?”“Hm, no,” he said. “I was trying not to…” listen.Then he was the only one, but no one else seemed to have noticed that bit. Maybe they thought Bella was rambling nonsense. It certainly sounded like nonsense. “Something killed some hikers in the Park, recently. Then there was a sighting nearer to town. The hikers that lived called it a bear, but a big one.”He closed his notebook. It might be a bear. The Quileutes wouldn’t kill anyone. I’ll look into the police report, if I can find it. This could be nothing.It didn’t feel like nothing. “Okay.”Carlisle watched me for a moment before returning to his notes.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Bella

I didn’t go to school Friday. I couldn’t even get out of bed until the urge to vomit was overpowering – but after some light retching into the toilet I was feeling better and able to sip water. Charlie was none the wiser. He had left for work without waking me. I was still in my dress and I smelled all over like Edythe Cullen.My humiliation increased to new, previously impossible lengths as the night came back to me in snippets. Edythe had held my hand – to keep me from falling and hurting myself, probably – and carried me home – to keep Charlie from blaming the Cullens for my inebriation, I guessed – and I remembered, horrifically, asking her to take my dress off. Everything after that was gone.I was ignoring texts from my friends at school, wondering where I was, when someone knocked on the front door. They knocked again when I ignored it, and I sat up in bed, stomach flipping at the movement. Who would be knocking?At a normal volume, I said, “Knock twice if you’re Edythe.”Downstairs, there was one hard rap, and this apparently meant Alice. When I finally got to the door, she strode inside with two large Tupperware balanced on one hand and a six-pack of ginger ales in the other. “Good morning,” she sang, going right to the kitchen like she had been to our house before.“What?”“We thought you could use something fortifying to eat. For the hangover.” Alice set everything on the tiny table. One container was clear, a thick yellow liquid sloshing inside when she shook it. I had to look away. “Chicken and rice soup, focaccia bread, and some ginger cloves for chewing.”“’We?’”“Everyone!” Alice said brightly.I shut my eyes, then I had to slide down to the floor, putting my head between my legs. “Fuck.”“Here,” Alice said, placing a bottle of ginger ale on the floor next to me. She loaded the rest into the fridge. “Did you take Tylenol already?”I didn’t answer. My first real impression on the Cullens was going to be this. Forever. Being so obviously wasted that they had to cook me a meal. And Edythe hadn’t even been the one to bring it – she must have been so done with me.Without Alice’s rummaging I only heard the rain against the windows and my own heartbeat. She was standing with a hand one on hip, watching me.“Thank you for the soup,” I said. “I’ll be okay.”“I know you will.”I let the silence drag on until I couldn’t stand it. “You don’t have to stay. I’m going to go back to bed soon.”She turned her eyes around the room, stopping on the closed refrigerator door and stepping closer to it, peering at the variously magnet-ed photographs, receipts, and Christmas cards.“Can you tell Edythe –” I cringed as Alice looked at me. “I mean – I don’t have her…number…”I didn’t even have her number, I realized. Clearly, she didn’t want me to have it, as she had not given it to me prior to the concert. Almost everyone else I had met in Forks had given me their phone numbers unsolicited – some, like Jessica, taking my phone without asking to input their contact.“Can you just tell her I’m sorry? And…thanks for getting me home?”“Just tell her yourself,” Alice said, going back to the fridge. “And you don’t need to apologize to Edythe. Trust me.”“I think I threw up on her.”“No,” Alice said, distracted. “Is this your mother?”I squinted. She had lifted up a hallmark card to reveal the photo of baby me and my parents at Christmas.“Yeah.”“She’s beautiful,” Alice said dreamily.“I know.” I unscrewed the soda cap. “What…about you?”She turned on her heel and came to me, sitting on the floor by the foyer across from me. “What about me?”I hesitated, taking a sip. I didn’t want to be rude. Edythe’s story had been – sad. To say the fucking least.“Your mom.”Alice blinked. Her eyes were more yellow than I had ever seen, and I wondered if they were letting the facade slip just for my benefit. “I don’t know,” she said. “I don’t remember my human life.”My instinct was to smile, though I wasn’t sure I got the joke. Alice only looked at me, and I realized she was serious.“Oh!” I said. “I just – Edythe told me about herself, as a hum- as an alive – um.”“It’s okay,” Alice said, taking mercy on me. “Edythe didn’t tell you about me? At all?”I couldn’t gauge the tone in her voice – was she offended? “No, not really. Not really anything about any of you, other than that you and Jasper have…powers.”Alice raised her eyebrows, looking down at her sneakers. “I woke up alone, as you see me now. It was 1923, in Biloxi, Mississippi. That’s pretty much it.”It probably shouldn’t have been surprising, considering what I knew about Edythe. But Alice – ninety years old!“My power was there from the beginning,” she said. She smiled. “The visions. I knew, without knowing how, really, that I was looking for Jasper – a boy with blonde curls and dimples. After that, I had to find Carlisle and his family. I knew that they would be waiting for us.” She shrugged. “And it all worked. So, pretty lucky. For an amnesiac.”I took another sip of soda, pretending it was making me feel better. “Yeah, I bet. So Carlisle didn’t…?”“Bite me? No. I don’t know who did.” She sighed. “It’s a strange thing, though, to turn someone and not be there. Or so I’m told. Go on, you can ask me.”I hadn’t been thinking of asking anything, but her aggressive command caught me off guard. “Um...have you ever...?”She grinned, and her teeth were very white. “I’ve never tasted human blood.”“Don’t sound so proud,” I said, unsettled but curious.“Well it’s pretty impressive, I think. Only Carlisle has–” She stopped, and for the first time, maybe ever, looked uncomfortable. I latched onto her words, repeating them in my head.“Just you and Carlisle?”She bit her lip, eyebrows low. Unbidden, I saw a vision of Edythe crouched over a crumpled body, blood dripping down her chin. The body looked a lot like Jacob.“I probably shouldn’t have said that. But it’s not as bad as it sounds!” Alice tried, and winced. “Don’t look at me like that, Bella. I’m a special case, most vampires can’t help it.”“You’re talking about murder,” I pointed out.“Well, if you’re going to put in black and white terms.” She didn’t sound at all apologetic. “My family is the exception to the norm. Get it?”“Not really.”She settled back against the wall with a sigh. “Living with the humans, acting like humans, it just isn’t done. Most of us live like feral cats. We can...forget. What it means to be human. Some of us see you as prey.”Like when Edythe had told me before, I didn’t know how to feel. Upset? Scared?“Best ask her yourself,” Alice said, though I hadn’t mentioned Edythe at all. “Like I said, not as bad as it sounds.”I looked up guiltily, and Alice smiled wider. Like I could ask Edythe a question like that. How many? Did you enjoy it? Have I ever come close to making the list? “Edythe told me that you don’t do this often.”“Do what?”“Make friends with humans.”“Oh, we don’t,” she said dismissively. “Humans don’t usually want to make friends with us. What did you think when you first saw us?”I shrugged. “I was…interested.”“Yeah,” Alice said. “So was she. She’s all about you right now. Which is why you don’t need to apologize. You couldn’t have done a better job if you’d roofied yourself last night.”I stuttered for a second, belligerent. “What are you talking about?”She put her hands flat on the floor. “I should get going, anyway. You should rest.”Now I wanted her to stay. Her words were still spinning around my head.Her goodbye was a quick touch to my head, and then she was gone and a car engine started up in the driveway. I sat where I was until the ginger ale was gone. I had no plans other than trying to die quietly in bed and think of something to say to Charlie when he asked why I wasn’t at school.I watched TV for a while, curled up on the couch with nothing to do but feel gross. I even showered again, washing my hair twice and brushing my teeth of the coffee smell. Charlie got home really early, around three. He looked tense, taking his gun off but not his belt.“What’s wrong?” I asked over the couch back.“Another campsite torn to shreds,” he sighed. “I’ve been with the search party all day. Just came home to eat – I’ve got to head back out.”“There’s soup in the fridge,” I said. I heard him pull the door open, then put something in the microwave. “Hey,” he said, coming back and looking at me through the doorway. “Aren’t you home early?”“I stayed home,” I said evenly. “Migraine.”My mom got migraines – headaches so strong they put her in bed for entire days. Charlie didn’t question me on it. “Do you think it’s that bear you were talking about?” I called.Charlie brought his bowl of soup into the living room and sat in the armchair. “We found some tracks, but…”“But what?”“They were big. Bigger than any we’ve seen in a while. Rangers think it must be a grizzly.”The biggest thing I’d ever seen in Phoenix was a coyote. There’d been a bear at the zoo, once, but it had been sort of small. “How big are those?”“They can get up to seven hundred pounds. But there aren’t that many around here. We won’t know until we find it. And kill it.”I pulled my feet in, wrapping the blanket around my cold middle. “You have to kill it?”“Got to. It tasted human blood, and clearly it wants more.”His choice of words was eerie beyond reason. “You’re going after it tonight?” I asked.“Got a few hours until sundown. At least ‘till then.”“You have guns, though, right?” I asked. Suddenly the thought of something hurting my dad seemed…I didn’t know, exactly. It seemed real. Realer than he or any other person involved with the bear could know.“Big guns,” he assured me, and that made him smile.I let him take the remote and flip the TV to the news. Mike texted me, offering to bring me anything I needed if I was feeling sick. I declined as politely as possible. I went through my messages, responding where necessary, until I reached my text history with Jacob.Night from hell, I had sent that morning, to no response. And before that was a few messages about Charlie (making fun of his premium sports channel purchases), then my ‘made it home’ text from Monday night, after the bonfire. Jake hadn’t responded to any of them.I froze halfway up the staircase, hand on the rail. It was a random, off the wall thought, but – four days. Jake hadn’t spoken to me in four days.It should have been nothing. If Jacob didn’t want to text me back, who cared? He had his own life. I wasn’t a clingy person. People didn’t need to answer all of my texts. I certainly didn’t answer every text I got.It wasn’t any of that – it was what Jacob had said to me, when he was shaking with emotion, after the bonfire. According to him, four days was all it took.I told myself I was being ridiculous, but pulled my phone back out of my pocket anyway. The dial tone rang in my ear. Once, twice, three times…No answer. I chewed on my lip. It was probably fine. I was being weird and overprotective. It was Friday, after all. He was probably out with his friends...I turned back toward the living room, rolling back on my heels. Charlie.He would be going to Billy’s in the morning, like he always did. I could tag along and see for myself what Jacob was up to. Even as I thought it, it sounded creepy. But I didn’t know if I could ignore the insistent feeling that something was wrong.I thought of the scared look in his eyes as he told me about Sam, and Paul. The way his arms trembled around me.“Dad?”“Yeah?” He was washing his bowl out in the sink.“You’re going to the reservation tomorrow, right?”He shook his head. “No, not tomorrow.”“Why not?”“Billy canceled. Which is good, because I’m probably working through the weekend.” He put the bowl in the dishwasher. When he turned around and I was still standing there on the bottom step, he paused.“Bella?”It was like I had been thrown from my body, watching myself say, “Why did he cancel?”“I don’t know, he didn’t really say. What’s the matter? Is it your head?”I screwed my eyes shut. “I haven’t heard from Jacob in a few days. I’m starting to get worried.”I opened my eyes. Charlie was grinning at me. “Did you two have a fight?”That bewildered me. Then it made me a little angry. “No. It’s just... Jacob told me something weird was going on with some guys. Actually, he called it a cult.”That got his attention – and I regretted saying it almost immediately. “A cult?” He wouldn’t have looked as shocked if I told him I’d gone out and shot the grizzly myself.  “On the reservation?”I took a breath. “Something like that. He was…scared of them.”“A cult,” he repeated. “Jacob said that?”I nodded, feeling lower than dirt. Charlie made a gruff sound and went straight to the landline, punching in a practiced set of numbers. He wasn’t grinning anymore. This was full-on Chief Mode. I had gone too far, and if I was wrong I might even feel bad about it.I heard, distantly, when the line picked up.“Yeah, it’s me,” Charlie said tersely. “Listen, I caught wind of some gang activity on the reservation. Is that true?”My eyes widened in surprise that Charlie had so completely believed me.There was a short pause, and Charlie’s face darkened. “I know it’s not my jurisdiction - I - You know that’s not what I meant, Billy. Maybe Jake heard about it –?”He had believed me enough to confront Billy. I was a horrible daughter. “Ask him about Sam Uley,” I whispered, drawing closer. Charlie glanced at me.“Something about a Sam Uley?”There was a longer pause. His face softened. “Well, I’m sorry to hear that. Sure. Let me know if you hear something.”He hung the phone up. “It doesn’t sound like he knows anything, Bells. He said Jake has mono. He’s really sick. Is that what’s got you feeling down, too?”“Dad, no! Jake did not give me mono.” I pushed my hands through my hair. Jake was sick.“What else did Jacob tell you?”“Hmm?” Shame and guilt welled up in my throat. I was a crazy person, really. Now I’d probably gotten Jake in trouble with his dad for telling me all of that.Charlie watched me. “About a cult, Bells.”Right. Time to backtrack. “Maybe I was exaggerating.”“And who’s Sam Uley?” He fixed me with a stern look. “If you think something’s going on down there – ““What did Billy say?”“He said he didn’t know anyone by that name.”My heart stopped.“Bella, what – ““Jacob must have got the name wrong,” I said, forcing a smile. “Really, I think it was just some kids at school.”  “You don’t look so good,” he said doubtfully. Charlie was a better cop than I’d given him credit for – maybe that’s why Forks was so boring.“I’m late,” I said, improvising on the spot. “I’m supposed to meet Angela and Jess at the diner.”“Okay,” he said after a long moment. “I’ll be working late. But please, Bella, don’t go near the woods. Alright?”I nodded, and he was gone by the time I came back downstairs with my keys. I was seething. Billy had lied. To his best friend. How could he do this to Jacob? How could he?My truck engine started with a roar. I really, really hoped Jacob was as sick as a dog. Because if he wasn’t, and this was all related to that stupid gang, I was going to kick some serious ass.The first houses of the reservation came into view much faster than usual, which must have meant I was speeding. I hoped all the police force was too busy with the bear to notice my beat-up Thing.I slowed down when I saw a tall boy with a baseball cap walking on the side of the road. My breath caught for a moment, thinking I had found Jacob so easily. But this boy was too wide, hair too short. Even from behind, I knew it was Quil.He looked up when I pulled my truck to the wrong side of the road to roll my window down. His expression, instead of surprised, was bleak. Unhappy. “Hey, Bella,” he said, the slightest smile on his lips.“Hey Quil. Are you okay?”“I’m fine,” he said.“Can I give you a ride somewhere?” I cast my eyes around, wondering where he was walking.“Sure,” he said, after a moment. He shuffled around the front of the truck and climbed in beside me.“Where to?”“Back by the shore. Go North.”“Have you seen Jacob today?” I asked, turning toward the beach. The question burst forth the moment I hit the gas.Quil stared out the windshield for a long moment before answering in a low voice. “From a distance.”“What does that mean?”“I tried to follow them. He was with Embry.” I frowned, wondering why Jacob would be acting so weird if he was with Embry all this time. “They were in Embry’s yard. I know they saw me, but – ““You can tell me,” I said desperately.“They just turned around and disappeared into the trees. I don’t think they were alone, I think Sam and his crew were there, too.”“So Sam did get to him,” I said through gritted teeth, matching his bitterness. “Both of them.”“You know about that?” He sounded surprised.“Is he just as bad as the others now?” I asked. Quil looked amazed.“Yes.”“And Embry?”“He’s never ignored me before,” Quil muttered.“I saw Jacob on Monday.” My hands shook around the wheel. “Do you think it’s drugs?”“I can’t see either of them getting into that. But what do I know? What else could it be? And why does no one care?” He sounded frustrated and scared. “Jacob and Embry…they didn’t want this. And now…” He heaved a sigh. “I don’t want to be next! You know?”“Have you told your parents?”He scoffed. “Yeah, I did. And Jake’s dad.”It must have gone like Jacob said it would. Like Sam Uley was a saint. We were almost to the reservation’s bait shop. I was thinking of something to say, something wise or comforting.    “I’ll get out here,” Quil said. “My house is right over there.”“I’m going to go wait for Jacob,” I said. It sounded a little childish, out loud. “Come with me.”“I don’t think you’ll find him,” Quil said, one hand on the door. “Good luck, though. You’ve probably got a better shot at it than I do.”He slammed the door and slumped off through the grass. I pulled a U-turn. Quil’s expression haunted me, an echo of the fear Jacob had let me see Monday night. I pulled into the front drive of his house, turning the engine off and climbing out. I would sit on their front porch all night if I had to.As soon as my feet hit the ground, I heard men’s voices. It sounded like it was coming from the back of the house. I took a step toward the path to go around, and the front door banged open. Jacob stood there, looking at me with surprise.“Bella?”I gaped at him.“What are you doing here?” He asked sharply, surprise turning to confusion. “You can’t – “He had changed radically since I’d seen him earlier that week. The planes of his face seemed to have hardened, formed into a man’s face. His neck and shoulders had thickened. His hands, where they clenched into fists at his sides, looked enormous.Four days. It had only been four days. I grappled with the reality of it.“You’re not sick.”He continued to look unsettled. Like he had the right. “Bella, listen, you got to get out of here. I’ll talk to you –” He made a choking sound. “I need to tell you, but not right now. I can’t.”“Jake,” I said, holding out my arms. “What the fuck is going on?”He strolled forward, feet bare on the cold, wet ground. “Everything’s fine. I have – the flu.”I stared at him in blank shock. “Well, it’s mono, according to your dad, and you definitely don’t have that, either.”Jacob glanced back toward the house. “It’s not what I thought,” he relented. “I was wrong.”“What is it, then?”His eyes danced over me, then away. “I can’t tell you.”“You can’t tell me what, Jacob? Can’t tell me why Billy just lied to my dad about you?”“You really don’t know what you’re talking about. Just…go home, okay?”“You know Quil is terrified, right?” If he wouldn’t talk to me, if our friendship wasn’t what I thought it was, then I would use whatever I could to snap him out of it. “He thinks you’re on drugs, or – or worse!”“Bella…” He snapped his mouth shut, hands clenching into fists. “Quil is – “Whatever it was, he didn’t seem capable of saying it. Deep down, I hoped this was him being unable to lie directly to my face, that I was somehow more trustworthy than Charlie. I heard the voices again, in the backyard – laughter. Loud laughter. It was them. Jacob tried to stop me as I started toward the path, wrapping a huge hand around my arm.“Bella –”I jerked away so viciously that he actually dropped his grip, startled. I half-ran to the backyard, where they stood at the edge of the trees, about twenty yards from me. Four of them.“Hey!” I yelled across the space, storming toward them. They all turned to look. Embry was there, in the back, looking just as inexplicably beefy as Jacob. “Who the fuck do you think you are?”Jacob called my name, but I was focused on the oldest one – Sam. In a moment of rage, I shoved at his chest. His bare chest – why were they shirtless?He didn’t move an inch, and he didn’t say anything.“He didn’t want this!” I cried, pushing again, and why couldn’t I be just a few inches taller?“What if we do?” One of them snarled. He had been at the bonfire – the one staring at Jacob. I guessed it was Paul. “What did he tell you?”His eyes glanced up to Jacob almost threateningly. I moved into his field of vision protectively. “Nothing. He hasn’t told me anything. Because he’s scared of you.”“Calm down,” Embry said to me, laughing along with the guy next to him, shorter and with shorn hair. Sam laughed too, nervously. But it was Paul who laughed the loudest.He was the one that I slapped.It happened so quickly I couldn’t even believe that I had done it. There was a moment of shocked silence. Paul’s face twisted, in anger and then something beyond anger. I was sure he would hit me – I braced myself for it.“Do it,” I yelled. “Hit me. I dare you! Let me have a black eye to take to Charlie!”“Bella, get back.”I realized that my entire body strained toward Paul, over Sam Uley’s arm. He had picked me up, as easily as Edythe had but more painfully. With what seemed like only a push, he threw me bodily to the ground.“Paul,” he said firmly, standing between me and the boy who was now shaking with violent tremors. It shocked me out of my rage. I hadn’t hit him that hard.But everyone else was reacting, too. Jacob was there, looking between me and Paul with a horrified expression. Embry and the other guy took several steps back. And then there was a loud tearing sound. I looked around for the source before understanding hit me – it was coming from Paul.He shook so violently that his whole body seemed to blur, clothes falling off of him in tatters. And then…For the second time since moving to Forks, my world turned upside down.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Part Two: The Hunt

“We have been accustomed to hunt together, and we two, well armed, will be a match for whatever may come along.”

Bram Stoker, 1897

_________________________________

Bella
Vampires, mind reading, and super strength had gone down easy – this stuck. Was it possible that everything was true? Mermaids, witches, fairies, and elves? They were equally more believable to me than what I had just seen.I was a mess. I was panicked, and yet totally calm. It was the former that seemed to be expressing itself physically, with tears and sobs and snot. My hands shook. My tires skidded against a puddle on the side of the road, Thing’s engine loudly protesting the position of the accelerator pedal against the floor. I observed these things with a numb, vague interest, intent only on putting distance between me and...Halfway home, something thudded against my driver’s side door. I let out a primal scream and wrenched my wheel to the left. Had it followed me? Was it trying to run me off the road to finish me off?Instead of careening into the wall of tree trunks and certain death, a pair of icy cold, wet hands displaced mine on the steering wheel. My driver’s side door was open and there was a person climbing inside, her hair blowing into my face as wind flooded the cab. The car was still moving! In the space of a second, I was pushed into the passenger side of the bench, and Edythe was in my spot. She tugged the door shut and brought us to a graceful stop at the side of the road.Her appearance was unexpected but didn’t quite penetrate my shock. She was still Edythe, at least. No fangs or claws or rolling red eyes –“You’re okay,” she said, putting the car in park. Rain lashed against the windows and I blinked the spray out of my face from where it had just blown into my eyes. I pressed myself into the seat, unwilling to put my back to the dark trees to my right. I still had the sensation of something coming, hurtling toward me.“Bella?” Edythe asked.“We have to drive,” I said. My lips trembled and slurred the words. “We – we have to – “Edythe didn’t respond to my alarm. Her eyes were wide, yes, but I got the sense she was just looking at all of me, gaze darting around to find something that wasn’t there.“Where – w-where did you come from?” I asked. She was wet, rained on. Her simple t-shirt was stuck to her skin and rain dripped in rivulets down her bare forearms.“Alice…” she swallowed. “She saw your future disappear.”“What?”“Only for a second. She – it went dark. For a second.”Dark. I didn’t ask her what that meant.“I– I just saw–” Horror gripped me, belated and bewildered. That thing I had just seen– Paul! It was Paul. And if it was Paul, then it was Sam. And Jacob.Jake.I pushed the door open, nails scrabbling against the metal, gasping for fresh air. I retched, but nothing came up. “It’s not a bear!” I cried. “The hikers– Edythe–!”“It’s not them,” Edythe said quickly, somehow standing in front of me. She didn’t seem to notice the rain pelting us both. “They aren’t killing the hikers. Let’s get back in the car, okay?”She moved toward me. “Wait,” I said. She stopped. “Do you know?!”“I’ll explain everything. Please get back in the car.”“I almost died.” I barely understood Alice’s power and how it worked, but this seemed clear enough. “Paul almost killed me!”Edythe’s posture changed. She went stiff and all the forgiveness left her face. “Get in the car.”It was that vocal authority – the tone she’d used on the school nurse and the bartender at the benefit. So convincing. My natural response was to refuse, but the cold was stealing into my bones. I was wet and my knees were shaking. I turned for the door and she was already there, holding it for me. I climbed up and felt the impression of a hand on my back, but then it was gone.“Charlie said they saw prints in the mud,” I said. “Huge, animal prints. But that…”Edythe shook her head. “Not the pack.”I stared at her. “The pack?”She shut my door. The driver’s side door opened at the exact same time and she hopped back behind the wheel. “I said I would explain,” she said to the road instead of to me. Then, “Alice, damn it.”My door flew open again. I screamed and threw myself toward Edythe as Alice joined us, just as wet but grinning. She pushed a pile of towels into my lap.“It’s them,” she said quickly, voice bright. She threw a towel on top of my head. “Something about them – well, that’s not the point – they’re my blind spot, Eddie! Not before they turned, but after. When it was Jacob before, I could see. But now! Now, it’s Christmas.”“Have a little tact,” Edythe snapped at her as I pulled the towel off my head. It was gray. It was my towel. I had folded this very stack and placed it in Charlie’s bathroom closet not two days ago. “It’s not good news.”“You broke into my house,” I said numbly. Both girls ignored me.“It’s just good to know what the hell is going on!” Alice was saying. “I didn’t see it coming, until – well. You know. But if it weren’t for Bella I wouldn’t have known at all, I just happened to be watching her. I’m missing things...” She snapped her fingers. “Because they’re hunting something! That’s what it is! Coming over to Forks, or close enough. They are back. You were right! Bella, what are you doing?”What I was doing was failing to breathe. Air was shooting into my lungs too quickly, leaving them too soon. I gasped and choked on air.“She’s hyperventilating,” Edythe said.Alice pressed the towel back into my hair, rubbing frenetically. “Because she’s cold?”“No, you idiot. She’s frightened.”“Well, what do we do?”“Um,” Edythe said. “I don’t – ““I’m fine,” I said. Their rising alarm over my condition was at least distracting me from it. I took the towel and flattened it down, using it to hide my face. I was still hiccupping, sobbing uncontrollably. There was a hand on my back again and I didn’t know if it was Edythe’s or Alice’s. “No, wait.” I pulled the towel away. “I’m not. It’s – it’s Jake. I have to get him out of there.”“Bella,” Alice began.“I have to t-tell my dad that Jake’s in t-trouble. Billy doesn’t even – he knows but he doesn’t...” I couldn’t get the words out. I couldn’t explain how they could help me.“O-kay,” Alice breathed. There was a pause.Edythe said my name, and for her I looked up.“I can explain,” she said gently. “Carlisle can explain, and everything will make sense. Would you let us take you to our home? Just to talk.”“I need to see Charlie.”She glanced plaintively over at Alice.“Bella,” Alice said, pulling me to look at her. “Going to Charlie will only make things worse for Jacob. You have to trust us on this. His secret is as important as ours.”I stared at her, her words sinking in slowly. I sat back.“Maybe focus on breathing,” she suggested as Edythe put my car into drive. I couldn’t focus on anything, but I could turn my attention to the way Edythe’s elbow brushed my side, the way her shoulder pressed so hard against mine. I was still leaning into her._______________________They lived on the other side of town, North of the sprawling neighborhoods and past a stretch of tree-lined road. The foliage was so thick I would never have caught the turn Edythe guided Thing into, a slight gap in the trees with a graveled pathway. We passed through a tunnel of trees, dripping and overbright with pigment, and then the lawn opened up.It was big, probably three or four acres of grassy field. It wasn’t unkempt, but the grass was tall, swaying happily in the dregs of rainstorm. The Cullens’ home sat snug at the back of it, nestled between pine trees and immaculate shrubs. It was brick and beige and mostly window, two storied and elegantly spread. Nicer than Charlie’s, but not Renée’s new place, though it was certainly bigger than both.“I’ll tell them we’re here,” Alice said, hopping out of the car while Edythe was still moving, still following the circle of gravel around the lawn toward the paved driveway that appeared two-thirds of the way there. I looked for her, but after my car door shut she disappeared.Edythe didn’t look happy. She frowned like we were driving to the gallows, which didn’t help my anxiety at all. I brushed my fingers through my hair again, apprehensive of all the Cullens seeing me half-drowned and puffy eyed.I had gotten my breathing under control, but every time the thought hit me anew – that’s what Jake was scared of – I wanted to break down again. I should have taken him, somehow. Dragged him into the car with me, brought him here so the Cullens could keep him safe.“The cold ones,” I said. “That fucking story.”Edythe hit the brakes, looking at me warily. We were still far from the house. She was driving slowly, for once.Wolf-warriors, bloodlines, Jacob’s ancestor.The Cullens  are   the cold ones. The very same ones.“You did know,” I said. “Jacob thought it was just a story, but you knew.” I told her the story, that night going to the concert. I’d been so focused on the cold ones part of it, I didn’t stop to think... “I’m such an idiot.”“No,” Edythe said.“It was right there!”“No,” she said again. “I was. It makes sense. You…you were more concerned about the present threat.”That was true. I had been rabid to know about Edythe. I still was.“You don’t have to come inside,” Edythe whispered. “If you’re scared.”“What?” I looked at her. “Scared of you?”“Yes.”I shook my head. Paul’s snapping teeth still felt inches from my face. “I’m not scared of you.”She moved us forward, parking Thing expertly beside a shiny white Land Rover.“Do I look okay?” I stage-whispered, suddenly very panicked again about going inside.Edythe sort of grimaced, looking me up and down. “You look fine.”Gee, thanks, I thought, pushing my door open. I walked bravely up the sidewalk, Edythe in front of me. I was definitely not hiding behind her as she opened the front door. She held it for me, so I had no choice but to enter first.The interior was spacious, white and cream and decorated like a Home and Country issue. I saw white leather couches and a white area rug, mocha-brown armchairs and a huge television mounted on the wall. Then I saw Esme and Carlisle.They waited a few feet back, near a staircase that arched up out of sight, arms around each other like proud parents seeing off a college student. Doctor Cullen wore a stiffly-pressed button-up and belted khakis – perpetually a housewife’s wet-dream. The last – only – time I had seen Esme was at the benefit, all dolled up, but now she had on leggings and a large sweater. She was younger like this, softer, like my mother after she’d met Phil. An interior youth. But Esme, at least in appearances, looked a bit older than my mom.“Hello, Bella,” she said, smiling.“Hi,” I replied. Her smile was almost as dazzling as Edythe’s. My voice broke and I had to clear my throat.Edythe closed the door behind me, drawing up into the space I had failed to vacate, and this time I definitely felt her hand on my back. Not pushing me, but hanging there. “You’ve all met her. Maybe we skip the formalities?”Esme nodded seriously, her smile falling away. She took two startlingly quick steps toward me and took my hand in hers, tsking softly. “Take your coat off, let me get you a blanket. Here, you sit – “She had already pulled my coat off as she lowered me into one of the brown chairs. I sank into it, and a faint perfume seemed to float up out of the upholstery. It was indescribable.“Here,” Edythe said, holding out a knit throw blanket the color of whipped cream.“I’m not – ““Don’t do that, Swan,” she said tightly. “Just take it.”I took it from her, spreading it over my lap. I was shivering, but my hands shaking had nothing to do with the cold. Edythe stood there for a second, then backed up and sat at the edge of the shorter white couch. Alice was next to her, reclined, although I was sure she hadn’t been there a moment before. All the flitting about was wreaking slow havoc on my mind. Alice flipped through muted television channels. I let my eyes rest on the screen.I jumped when Esme lowered a second blanket over my shoulders. Then a second pair of hands – attached to Rosalie – held out a mug. “It might be too hot,” she said. She didn’t release the handle until I had pressed my fingers to it, testing, and found it just this side of bearable. “It might be too strong. I can’t really tell.”It was coffee, but I could barely smell it over the chair and the scent Rosalie had brought over with her. Vampires smelled good. Was that in any of the stories? I took a tiny, tiny sip of the coffee. It was black, but rich. “It’s good,” I said. I wasn’t sure why I wanted to reassure Rosalie, but I felt better when my assurance made her smile. She stepped back and the room took on a waiting quiet.Carlisle was sort of pacing in front of the TV, local news scrolling behind his head. He held a knuckle to his mouth, pensive, watching Edythe. Edythe watched him back, eyes wide. After glancing a few times toward me, she nodded and only then did he speak.“Would you please tell us what you saw, Bella?” He asked politely, dropping his hand to cross his arms over his chest.I didn’t know what to say, or where to begin. How did one explain anything about what Paul had done. What he – what all of them – were guilty of. And I didn’t want to implicate Jacob. If there was some way to get him out of this, I had to find it.Alice rolled her finger in the air, like I was taking too long and she needed me to hurry up.“I watched a boy turn into a wolf,” I finally said. The Cullens didn’t look very surprised. Because they already knew.Carlisle took a slow breath, preparing to speak.“Were you attacked?” A voice asked. I had to turn around to find Jasper, standing at the far back wall by the stairs. Emmett, at his side, winked at me.Carlisle waited, eyebrows raised, for my response.“…No,” I said. “I hit him first.”That got a reaction. Rosalie looked at me like I was crazy. Carlisle blinked rapidly. Emmett laughed. They weren’t surprised that wolf-men existed. Just that I had hit one.“Are you serious?” Edythe asked, drawing my attention. She looked less shocked than irritated. “You hit him first?“Why?” asked Alice.I couldn’t explain without telling them why Paul had earned the slap in the first place. He had hurt Jacob. “Does it matter?”“How many are there?” Jasper asked next, and Edythe and Alice threw him matching looks of warning. I half-turned in my seat to look at him. His eyes were the brightest gold in the room. “More than two?”“Why?” I asked, more confused than anything. “I mean, I don’t know for sure...”“How old are they?”“You don’t have to answer that, Bella,” Carlisle said somewhat mildly. “In fact, please don’t. Did you know what he was before you hit him?”“Of course not,” I said. “But you did.”“Yes,” he nodded. “We met them a long time ago, the first time we came here. But Edythe tells me you already know that story.”I tried to remember the pieces of it Jacob had told me that day on the beach. “They made some kind of...agreement with you.” According to Jacob, the story happened to his great-Grandfather. And Edythe had spoken with him.“Why didn’t you tell me?” I asked her. Her eyes widened. “You told me about you!” If she had said something, I might have been able to get Jacob away from there. I could have saved him.“Shapeshifting,” Carlisle said before Edythe could respond, “is a genetic trait. It lies dormant for generations at a time. Edythe didn’t know Jacob Black was a shapeshifter, she only knew his potential to be one.”Hearing him say Jake’s name jarred me. “A genetic trait?” I repeated.“As I understand it, one that exists only in certain Quileute lineages.”Jacob was a descendant of Ephraim Black, so that unfortunately tracked. Were Sam Uley, Jared and Paul also descendants of his wolf-warriors? Was that why Billy was being so…so annoying to Jake about it? Because it really was an honor? Was Billy a wolf-man, too?Everyone was watching me, so I stammered: “W-Why now? Why Jake?”Carlisle flicked his eyes to Edythe again. “I can’t be certain. I only know it as they understand it themselves...they seem to think the gene’s characteristics are triggered by contact with our kind.”Jake had told me himself he’d never met the Cullens. I knew Billy didn’t like Dr. Cullen, but I wasn’t sure they had ever met, either. “You’ve been here for years.”“We haven’t done anything,” Alice said. “We stay away from them – that’s part of Carlisle’s agreement.” She frowned. “But we aren’t the only ones out there.”I digested that, pulling the blankets close. “Vampires? In Forks?”“More likely than you think,” Emmett joked.“It’s a desirable location for our kind,” Carlisle said. “This part of the country. Sunlight is minimal, humans live in isolated locales, they go hiking…”My stomach roiled at the reminder. “So Jacob didn’t...?”“I already told you that,” said Edythe roughly.“Then why did Charlie find their footprints?” I shot back, forgetting our audience for a moment. Edythe was always very good at making me feel like the dumbest person in the room. “Why is Billy covering it up?”Edythe looked away from me with a sigh. As usual, I wanted to shake her for more information.“They were at the scene of the crime,” Alice said, “because they were investigating it. Just like Chief Swan is.”Rosalie, Esme and Carlisle watched me expectantly. Rosalie cocked an eyebrow.“These vampires,” I said. “They would be...not vegetarians, then.” They would be the kind that were cannibals.Carlisle half-smiled at my phrasing, but his eyes were troubled. “Most of our kind live nomadically. If they come upon us, living semi-permanently in a human community, we warn them off. Usually they’re curious, but leave when we ask. These ones...they don’t seem interested.”“My dad said their bodies were ripped apart. By an animal,” I said. I was not quite able to understand him. “With huge prints. A – bear. That’s all they could think of that could do that.”Edythe inhaled sharply and sat up, looking around. Nobody spoke – out loud, at least. After a beat she slumped again.“That’s what it looks like,” she said to the floor.“What?”“When a vampire gets hungry.”I didn’t know what my face looked like, but it was enough to make Alice flip the TV off. “If you’re halfway smart,” she said casually, “you’ll make it look like an animal killed them. Humans are less suspicious that way. But these nomads, whoever they are, aren’t being subtle. They’ve already caught the attention of the Quileutes. They’re being hunted.” She threw her hands up. “And if the Quileutes are hunting them, I’m blind.”“Is that so?” Rosalie asked curiously.“Yep,” Alice said. “They’re blinding me. From the nomads, from Bella – I didn’t even know she was going over there today! There could be a thousand nomads in Forks and as long as they stayed on the other side of town, I don’t think I would be any the wiser!”“Doesn’t explain why they’re avoiding us,” Emmett mused. “Or why they haven’t just skipped town.”I was still stuck on Alice suggesting a thousand vampires. “I have to tell Charlie.”“Alright,” Alice said dismissively, “don’t get hysterical, Bella.”“No, I have to – to tell him something. He’s been out there in the woods every day hunting a bear. Do guns even work on you?” I asked. Rosalie blinked disbelievingly, like I’d said something rude. “I mean – he’s out there now.”Edythe had stopped a car from hitting me like it was nothing. She’d moved me out of the way and left bruises all over me without even trying. She’d carried me home from the benefit. I had considered she could kill me, but that death had always been two puncture holes in my neck. Not total annihilation.“He’s okay,” Alice said. “I can see his future.”But she sounded doubtful. Esme suddenly stood up and crossed to me, sitting delicately on the arm of the chair and winding a rock-hard arm around my shoulders. “Guns don’t work,” she said helpfully, brushing my hair back. “Carlisle, what can be done?”Edythe walked to the window. The sun was already setting. Carlisle studied her back. She turned as though called, staring at him balefully. It was unnerving.“Can’t you…go get them?” I asked. “Tell them to leave?”“It rained before we could get to the last murder site,” Emmett said from behind us. “If we can’t use Alice to find them, we’ll need to follow their trails and those got washed away.”Silence fell as everyone exchanged meaningful looks. Alice sighed heavily, gazing off at the wall. “Nothing. I don’t see it, but...”I glanced around. More than ever around the Cullens, I felt like a complete outsider.“If you don’t see us finding them...” Carlisle began.Edythe said, “No.” It wasn’t obvious to me who she was talking to. She just frowned very hard at the floor.“No,” she said again, louder. “There has to be another way.”“It’s simple,” Alice responded. “Her whole night just disappeared. She can just ask him.”Edythe looked up at me, like I had done something wrong. “What?” I asked, beyond confused.She stared, nose wrinkled. Was this always how it went? It seemed like the group’s individual quirks were ratcheted up to a hundred when they were in the same room.“What?” I repeated. Edythe turned her head fractionally toward Carlisle and nodded, releasing a short breath through her nostrils. Like a tennis spectator, I looked back to Carlisle, who was pensive again.“If these nomads are crossing into Quileute territory, we can’t track them,” he said out loud, apparently for my benefit, although Rosalie was also looking fed up with Edythe’s antics. “If the wolves are leaving their own territory to hunt them, they preclude Alice from looking ahead to where we might encounter them. If we cross paths with the wolves out in the woods, they might not take the time to exchange words and hear us out...” he nodded to himself. “But we know there is someone they might listen to.”He looked at me and half-smiled, apologetic.“Me?” I asked stupidly. “Why would they listen to me?”“There’s no guarantee they will, but perhaps you could carry a message to your friend.”“What kind of message?”“We come in peace?” Alice suggested.“We want to help,” Carlisle amended. “We can help. We need them to agree to let us, and to share any information they have that can help us track these nomads. We’ll need to set a meeting.”I blinked, my headache returning suddenly and in full force. I had yet to come to terms with what had actually happened today. Now I was being sent back to Jake like some kind of supernatural carrier pigeon. Did Jacob even know about the Cullens? Well, he knew one legend was true. He apparently was hunting vampires in Forks. The Cullens wouldn’t be that much of a stretch.“I can...” I cleared my throat. “I can give you his cell phone number?”Carlisle raised his eyebrows, and then I knew exactly where Edythe had learned how to make someone feel like a moron. From him. “That’s not a terrible suggestion,” he said politely. “But I feel they wouldn’t appreciate a phone call.”And I had been suggesting a text. “Right,” I said, nodding. “I’ll just...I’ll just give them your message.”“Okay,” Edythe said, getting to her feet. “That’s decided. I’ll take you home, now.”I stood dazedly, wondering if the sudden dismissal had anything to do with the way Rosalie was now looking at me – like my welcome had worn out. There was an attempt at folding the blankets that were around me, but Esme swiftly took them away. She hugged me.“You’re welcome anytime in this house,” she said in my ear.“Oh! Um, okay,” I responded. Emmett thrust my coat at me. It had been dried and was still warm from the machine. “Uh, thank you.”“No worries,” he smiled, very lightly patting my shoulder. It still jarred my teeth together. “Get home safe.”“Let her go,” Edythe snapped imperiously. Emmett ducked out from between me and the door, and I basically fled. Halfway down the walkway I realized I was flushed and sweating all over. Belated embarrassment dulled everything else – I had acted like a stuttering idiot in there. That, mixed with the humiliation from the night before, was a lot.I held out my hand. Edythe stopped at the door to the Thing, seemingly considering her chances of just ignoring me.“It’s my car,” I said.“And you nearly wrecked it earlier.”“Let me drive my car,” I insisted, although it sounded like a whine.My keys appeared in her hand and she palmed them into mine, heading around to the passenger side. So she wanted to ride, anyway. I was kind of relieved I didn’t have to be alone, even if it was just for another few minutes.I started the car, looked up at the house, and made a slow, three-point turn, carefully leaving a large distance between Thing and the nicer car next to it. This little field really was beautiful, the tall, cresting hills around it even more so. You wouldn’t guess they were ten minutes from the suburbs. You wouldn’t guess they were ten minutes from anywhere.“So did–?”“They can still hear you,” Edythe interrupted.I looked into the rear-view mirror. We were across the wide lawn – a quarter of a mile, easy. And yet it was another two minutes before Edythe said: “You’re good.”I came to a stop, idling in a thicket of dense trees. Sunset trickled down in shades of pink and gray. The rain had stopped for the time being, but still dripped from the leaves onto my windshield. I shut my eyes and took another deep breath, and then a third, trying to calm myself.When I opened them, Edythe was watching me. Her expression was much softer than it had been in the house.“I know this is a lot,” she said quietly. “I’m sorry.”“What else don’t I know?” I asked her. “What else is there?”“Nothing, so far as I know.”I was still drenched in nervous flop sweat. I lowered the heat. “Why did you bring me here? Was it just to convince me not to tell Charlie?”“No,” Edythe said. She sounded surprised. “That’s not why.”“Because the first time, you just tried to convince me it wasn’t real. That I was crazy.”“Well, we’re a bit past that now,” she said.“I guess. You seem to care whether I live or die.” I glanced over, smiling to show I was joking. Edythe didn’t smile back.“I needed to think.” She paused, looking almost self-conscious. “When I don’t know what to do, I usually turn to Carlisle. The rest, too, but...I find his mind the most organized. It centers me.”Coming from Edythe, that felt like a very personal admission. I had seen it, though, in the confusing way the Cullens communicated as a group. They didn’t need to speak out loud for Edythe to respond. Carlisle didn’t seem to need to read her mind to know what she was thinking, either.“I didn’t know you would be nominated to propose a meeting,” she continued, frowning. “You don’t have to, you know.”“Oh, yeah,” I said, reaching into my pocket for my phone.“What are you doing?”“Calling Jake.” But I paused, remembering how he had been ignoring my calls all week. Why would he answer now? I had slapped his crush across the face and run away, screaming, when he retaliated. “Or maybe I should just go back to the – ““I don’t think that’s necessary,” Edythe said. “Alice saw your night disappear before we even decided on this course of action.”My headache throbbed. “Meaning?”“He’ll probably come to you. Regardless, you should give them some time to calm down before you go back.”I thought about that, putting the car back into drive and proceeding back to the main road. Would Jacob assume I had gone to Charlie? I already had, I realized, by making Charlie call that morning about a gang. If only I’d known what was really going on. Poor Jake. I had noticed something, and had even said it to him - the changes to his body that didn’t make any sense, the muscles and insane height.“Why can’t Alice see their future?” I asked as I made the wide turn back south. “Is something going to happen...”I really couldn’t even finish the thought.“She can’t see anything, even something that might happen to them. It must be something about them,” Edythe mused. “But I can’t imagine what. Except that they seem designed to be our perfect natural foil. But my gift works on them. Rather, it did before. I guess I’m not so sure.”“What if it’s me?” I asked.“How?”“Well, you never met anyone you couldn’t read. Until me. And now Alice can’t see Jake? That’s a weird coincidence, isn’t it?”Edythe seemed to be considering it. “Alice can see your future,” she said. “And, on Monday, she saw you going to see him.”“Well, on Monday, he wasn’t a...wolf.”“I don’t think it has anything to do with you,” she said firmly. “Except for the fact that you have very bad luck. Maybe it’s catching.”I laughed. “What are you talking about?”She shook her head. “It’s nothing.”“I don’t have bad luck!”“You really, really do. Maybe not before, but definitely after moving here.” She sat up a little, crossing her arms. “Think of your first day here. You were paired with a vampire in biology. The universe threw me at you. Then, when that didn’t work, it threw Tyler Crowley and his car at you. Then what almost happened in Port Angeles. And now werewolves.”“You’re forgetting getting asked to the dance three times,” I joked. “But also...I mean, the list is impressive, but I don’t think meeting you was bad luck.”“You don’t know the half of it,” Edythe said. I shrank in my seat a little at her tone. She hadn’t liked me at first. Maybe I was deluding myself into thinking her opinion had changed.“They can kill you?” I asked when we were passing the grocery store. “These...nomads?”“They certainly could, if we were outnumbered, but nomadic groups hardly ever get above three or four. Our numbers protect us.”“And...a werewolf?” I asked, borrowing her word. Paul had exploded right in front of me – brown fur, giant feet with sharp claws, and snarly, spit-slick teeth.“Oh,” she said with relish. “Yes. You seem incredibly eager to discover a way to murder me.”I bit my lip. “Fair’s fair. You know how to kill me.”I could feel her looking at me, and I blushed.“Dismemberment,” Edythe said. “Then incineration. That’s how. You wouldn’t be strong enough.”“So no human has ever killed a vampire?”“You couldn’t,” she said again.“What were they like?” I asked next. “The wolves you met the first time.”“Young,” Edythe said. She rubbed her hands along her knees, fingers curling over the denim. “Frightened.”“Of you?”“We had come only a few years after they were attacked by some other vampires. They thought it was over, but then we showed up. They were wary, but Carlisle was kind. They didn’t trust him, but they had lost two of their own killing a cold one and they didn’t want to lose anymore against us three.”“That was Jake’s great-Grandfather,” I said, and Edythe didn’t seem to have a response to that.“I’m sorry,” I said as we passed the high school. “For the blacking out thing. And the throwing up.”“I had...fun,” she said quietly. Our eyes met. Edythe frowned, per usual, and her eyes glowed like embers in the growing darkness. She was the one to blink and turn away first and I remembered I was driving.The sun was fading when I turned onto the road that would take me to my street. I was thinking of a way to invite Edythe inside. What did I have to offer? It wasn’t like I could invite her in for a cup of coffee or to warm up dinner or something. I could ask her to just sit with me so I didn’t completely spiral, but that seemed pathetic. Edythe solved the problem for me.“Pull over,” she said suddenly.“Why?”“I’ll get out here.” When I kept moving, she said: “Jacob Black is in your house.”Jake. My nerves spiked. I had planned on a shower and at least an hour of sleep before dealing with him. “Did he break in, too?” I asked mildly.“Seriously, pull over a second.”“But – ““It is not a good idea for him to see me right now. Trust me.”She was serious. I slowed and pulled over in the grass. Her eyes were glazed, fixed on the distance, trembling at nothing. “You can read his mind? From this far?”A tiny breath of laughter escaped her mouth. She looked enraptured. “Yes, just.”So that answered one question. Even though Alice was blinded, Edythe could read Jacob just fine. I watched her face, the minute flickering of her eyelids, the unconscious widening of her eyes and nostrils. “What’s he thinking about?” I asked. Something interesting, obviously. “Is he mad at me?”Slowly, Edythe turned and looked. Her eyes focused on me with difficulty, like she had to snap herself away from Jake’s brain. “Should he be?”I shrugged. Edythe’s expression tensed.“Your father’s not home. Should it wait?”“What?”“Maybe you don’t want to see Jacob right now,” she suggested.“No, I – I do, actually.” Okay, bright side - this was one better than having to decide to drive back to the reservation and look for him.“You’re not scared of him?”“No.”“You seemed pretty scared earlier. Terrified.”“Well, yeah! I was a little bit taken by surprise. But I’m not scared of Jake. He’s my…” friend. I would have called him my best friend. But I had hit Paul. I’d been completely blind to this horrible thing happening to him. I’d gotten Charlie involved. “You’re sure he isn’t mad?”“He’s quite worried about you.”I nodded. “Okay. Okay, I should go.”She put her hand on the door handle. “One more thing.”“Yeah?”She hesitated a moment. “The nomads haven’t come into town. Not yet. I think they’re avoiding our trails, which means they should avoid you. But...”“But Charlie’s going out there.”“Yes,” she said, frowning. “We’ll watch him. I was going to say that you should be careful anyway. Don’t go outside. Don’t drive after dark if you can help it. Don’t take rural streets.”A chill drove itself across my shoulders. “F-fine. You’ll watch him, really?”“Yes,” she said, meeting my eyes. “One of us will shadow him when he goes out hunting.”I gasped. “That’s – ““The least we could do. Until we get this resolved.” Her gaze intensified. “And the least you could do is not pick any more fights with wolves. Okay?”Before I could respond, the door was closing and she was gone, a whisper among the swaying ferns._________________________I flicked on the foyer light. My house was dark and silent.“Jake?” I called.There was a pause, and then from upstairs he called, “Up here.”My bedroom door was open, the only source of light on the second floor. Jake stood by my bookshelf, arms crossed over his chest in a clearly false show of confidence. He uncrossed them when I stepped inside.“How did you know - ?” He started to say. Then something came over him. His dark eyes blew wide and he stumbled back a step, catching himself on the window. His other hand covered his mouth and nose. “Holy fucking shit,” he said from behind it.I was immediately wrongfooted. “W-what?”In one motion he slid my window up and stuck his head outside it. “That smell. It burns.”Nonplussed, I lifted my sweater to my nose. It smelled like rain. “Jake...we need to talk.”“No shit,” he said to the backyard. “We’ve all been freaking out.”“I didn’t tell Charlie.”He pulled his head back in, turning to face me. He was still shirtless, and the calmer part of me really wanted to make fun of him for it. “No. The bloodsuckers scooped you before you could.”I felt my jaw drop open.“Where did they take you? Back to their fuckin’ crypt?”“So you know?” I asked, clarifying.“Yeah,” he said. “I know. Way more than I ever wanted or needed to know.”He was very irritated, but Edythe said he had been worried about me. I clung to that. “I’m sorry, Jake. For running away. I was just scared.”He ran a hand through his hair, scratching the back of his head. It was tangled and damp. There was dirt on his bare feet. “Yeah,” he huffed. “Whatever.”“I didn’t expect Paul to turn into a literal monster,” I said, growing defensive now. “He almost killed me!”“How can you stand there,” Jake said, “and call us monsters? How can you cozy up to the actual monsters and then act scared of us?”“The Cullens aren’t monsters,” I responded, and then wished I hadn’t. Jake rolled his eyes skyward and fell back against the wall, his jaw spasming as he clenched it. “They aren’t! Isn’t that the whole point of your agreement?”His eyes shot to me, wide with disbelief. “They told you about the treaty?”“No, Jake. You did. Remember?”He frowned and relaxed a bit. “Oh. Yeah.”“How did you know I was with them?”Jake slid to the floor, kicking his feet out in front of him. He heaved a big sigh. “You’re covered in their scent. It’s like bad cologne. Or bleach.”I had noticed a scent, too, but hardly thought it was like bleach. I kicked my shoes off and closed the door, even though Charlie wasn’t home. Jake watched me sit across from him, nose scrunching.“You’ve never been in my room before,” I said.The look that had stuck on his face since I’d arrived dissolved into a smile. “Yeah. I didn’t go through your shit, I swear. I was gonna give you until dark before I started calling.”“I didn’t know you still had a phone.”His smile turned rueful. “I kind of don’t. Hard to keep up with it.”Jake had shorts on, that was it. The fabric was worn and frayed along the bottoms. It fell down his thighs enough to display powerful muscle and dark leg hair. His knees looked less knobby than they had before, or maybe I was imagining that. His chest was bare and as impressive as the rest, even if he was still taller than his weight could keep up with. I didn’t see any marks, or scars. I wasn’t sure how this worked.I inched closer, resting my socked feet on top of his. I put my chin on my folded arms. “You look tired.”“You have no idea the week I’ve had.”“Do you want to talk about it?”He started to shake his head, then shrugged. “I wouldn’t know where to start.”“It’s not a cult.”That made him smile again. “No,” he said. “Not exactly.”__________________ 
Edythe
 
Emotions cycled through me like a developing tropical depression.Fear. Bella had almost died, I would have been able to do nothing about it, and if she hadn’t driven across the border line at the exact moment she did, I would have broken the treaty by going in after her. The wolves would have killed me without question, and then the rest of my family would have had to leave town. Permanently.Pain. It cost me something to be away from her, now that I knew what I knew, about me and about the nomads. She didn’t know how badly I wanted to touch her, to feel the beat of her heart instead of just listening to it. It killed me by degrees to watch her cry, to panic and sob and to not be able to offer any kind of comfort.Anger. Jacob Black had let this happen. It wasn’t him that almost did it, sure, but it was his pack, was it not? Ephraim Black had been the leader – not just appointed by the group, but assigned by whatever magic it was that controlled them. He had leverage over them, a subtle psychological advantage that, whenever exerted, they were forced to obey. Jacob should have protected her – thrown himself in front of her. She should not have left as scared as she had been.Curiosity. The wolves were exciting. My siblings buzzed with anticipation at finally getting to see what Esme, Carlisle and I had attempted to describe. Even if Alice was frustrated at their interference with her gift, they were something different. Different tended to run dry for our kind after about fifty years.Fear, again, because the presence of the wolves had to mean the presence of vampires. They were not close to us, or to town, but they were out there, in the mountains and hills and streams. They were not just passing through, obviously, or they would have split the moment they saw the wolves for the first time. Not even curiosity would keep them around – nomads were notoriously self-preserving - so it had to be something else. I was relying on Alice to see Bella’s safety – even with the wolves’ interference she had seen a potential death. I didn’t know how much longer I could stay away and pretend Bella’s safety wasn’t distracting my every thought.She was unlucky.Leaving her to talk to Jacob, I entertained the urge to eavesdrop. I had a different curiosity about Jacob Black – not so much what he was, but what he was to her. She worried sick about him. She thought he might be a killer and she was devastated, she wasn’t at all worried that he might explode on her the way the other one had, not even two hours previously. Her face lit up to hear he was waiting at her house – in her room.I did not listen in, ultimately. I walked back home and sat around with everyone else. We waited. Bella’s text came through two hours later.“They’ll think about it,” Alice read from her phone, setting it to the side and returning to staring blankly at the wall. She was thinking hard, turning the future over like a stone, over and over until it was polished from use. It didn’t matter – she still could not see whether or not we would meet with them. She couldn’t see how Bella and Jacob’s conversation went – and she wanted to know that as nearly as badly as I did.Just in case, Carlisle reviewed the points of the treaty with all of us. The boundary line followed the Sol Duc River and some other landmarks. We were not to pass. The rest had never really needed saying: Don’t kill. Don’t bite. Don’t come near us and turn our children into beasts.Alice’s phone buzzed again at eight o’clock the next morning. This time with a phone call.“It’s Bella,” Alice announced, darting down from her room to the kitchen. We were gathered within seconds as she slid her thumb across the screen. “Hey,” she said when it connected.“Hey,” Bella replied. Her voice was low and hoarse. My ears pricked up in interest. Had she just woken up? Is this what she sounded like fresh from sleep? “I just talked to Jake. They want to meet with you. Uh, today.”“Today?” Alice asked, eyebrows rising. I nodded in tandem with Carlisle. “Okay. When?”“Sam says ten o’clock. At...” there was a pause and a shuffle. My stomach swooped – was she not alone? Had she not slept alone? I fought very hard to keep these thoughts off of my face. I told myself it didn’t matter.“North of the Sol Duc River,” Bella said, as though reading. “Said you’ll know what that means.”“I guess their memory does go far back,” Jasper murmured, too low for Bella to pick up.“We know what it means,” Alice told Bella. Jasper leaned over her shoulder.“Why now?” He asked. “Did they let on why they would be so eager?”He relished the freedom to speak to Bella. He refused to breathe if she was in the room, and so was limited to what air his lungs could hold. I appreciated it, especially because it meant he couldn’t quiz her yesterday about strategy and the pack's numbers.“I just think it’s...gotten really serious for them,” Bella said carefully.She knows something, Jasper accused, looking at me. “Why do you say that?”Bella hesitated again. “I...I’m not sure.”Your mate is a terrible liar, Jasper thought. And you can’t read her mind – frustrating.I motioned for Alice to hang up.“Ten o’clock, Sol Duc,” Alice repeated. “Got it. We’ll take it from here, Bella, thanks.”“Uh,” Bella said. “I – um, good luck.”Alice lowered the phone.We were doing this – putting ourselves in the middle of something we arguably shouldn’t. And I wasn’t under the illusion it was for anything other than my benefit. Or Bella’s.Esme was smiling at me.“I didn’t see their decision,” Alice said, her tone brittle. She was feeling helpless, and it didn’t sit well. “I can’t see how it’s going to go.” This decision confirmed her fear. The wolves’ interference didn’t appear to her as an obstacle, it just erased what she couldn’t see.“We should be armed,” Jasper said, looking at Carlisle. “We should take the guns.”Carlisle’s eyes widened. “Guns,” he said tonelessly.“We don’t know how many there are,” Jasper said. “If they attack, what are our chances? I’m not getting near their teeth. A ranged weapon might do us some good.”“We are not going to fight them,” Alice said through her teeth. “And our guns? Are for show.”We shopped at the local camping goods store to keep up with the cover of family trips on sunny days. We had loads of equipment Jasper sold secondhand online. But apparently he hadn’t sold everything.“They work, don’t they?” He countered.“I can read them,” I said, waving aside his arguments. “We’ll have warning, even if it’s just a few seconds.”Jasper sighed, but let it drop. Our collective unrest over the past twenty-four hours was getting to him, sinking beneath his skin. If he wasn’t preparing for battle, he might have left us to go hunting for a few days, just to escape the miasma.“Meet by the front door in an hour,” Carlisle said. “Until then, everyone take a breath. Relax.”This was directed at Jasper, who nodded and went to find some fresher air outside. Bella’s scent lingered in our living room. It was like wool on a rash for him.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Edythe
I remembered the spot like it was yesterday. A wide, grassy clearing above a river tributary within earshot of the bubbling water. We visited a long time ago when Esme was new. Carlisle wanted to show her the cliffs. We were just a few miles away when I had been struck, out of nowhere, with a new kind of mind.The pack was a unique organism, instinct incarnate through a sort of genetic memory. There was no other way to explain how a young man could know how to move like they did, fight like they did. What aided them more than anything was a shared mental link that let them think at each other. Not unlike my gift, a boy in wolf-form could think and know the thoughts of another.Only two of them, Jasper thought in surprise as we neared the clearing. There were indeed only two beating hearts ahead of us, loud and quick. Bella had mentioned a Sam in addition to Paul – so there were at least three in total. Jasper still didn’t like our odds.We slowed and approached at a more human pace, pushing through thick undergrowth. Away from town, the thick wilderness was unchanged from my previous visit. And just like last time, I was entranced as their thoughts came into range.There were two individuals ahead of us, but I could hear more. At least four. Their thoughts spun and flitted back and forth above the individuals, who still could, when they chose, keep some thoughts out of the pack stream.They were counting us, too.
Seven, coming quick.

Fuck, I didn’t think all of them –

I told you to use Quileute! They can hear us!
You aren’t using it, Sam the Wise One.
Shut up.
There was silence as we entered the clearing. The wolves watched us with dark, dilated eyes. They were exactly as I remembered, at least so far as their size. Everyone on my side of the field masked their reactions, but Rosalie and Emmett were flabbergasted. Alice, without her foresight, was as flighty as Jasper. She stuck close to me, thinking, They look angry.Their hackles were raised, hair standing on end and teeth exposed. Very sharp teeth, Jasper was thinking. His skin itched in remembrance of other teeth on him.That’s Doctor Fang... the wolf on the left thought to himself. His hair was a russet red, large brown eyes flicking across our group. He noted Emmett as the biggest threat, but then he looked at Jasper.What the hell could do that? Thought one of the other minds, not present here but linked psychically through their bond.Their eyesight was much sharper than a human’s. They could see, just visible under the weak sunlight, the marks on Jasper’s skin. My own face flashed in the russet wolf’s mind next, and he thought, with displeasure, That must be Edythe.They took us in one by one, and I could see when our scent hit them as a wind blew across the field. The larger black wolf crouched on his front paws, snarling. The other pulled his lips back and growled low, saliva dripping from his mouth.“It’s nice to meet you,” Carlisle said. “An honor, really. We’re very glad you’ve accepted our offer to talk.”His voice sounds weird, the russet wolf thought to the pack mind. It, like, hurts.I could scarcely make any of it out. Beyond the thoughts and the disembodied voices speaking to the pack connection, there was something else. It was loud. Chaotic. Words, thoughts without form, chanted out one after the other in a panicked stream. Someone was hurt, bleeding. Someone was sorry, so sorry.In the chaos I saw my own face again. The black wolf was thinking. At me. The other voice, the chaotic one, said something about eggs and toast.“There’s too much going on,” I said. “I can’t tell what they want me to hear.”Bella told them about you, Jasper realized, incensed. You could have tried preserving one of our advantages.I ignored him. “You could think a little louder,” I suggested. “It’s not much of a difference to you, but I – “Only because it’s necessary, the black wolf said. I heard it that time. He was screaming it.I repeated him exactly to Carlisle, flattening my tone to avoid editorializing. The wolves were irritated that I had noticed the other voice. They were both trying to not think about Paul - no, Quil. Was that a name?Wonder if Bella was supposed to tell us that, the brown wolf thought idly, watching the irritation flickering on Jasper’s face. I presumed him to be Jacob – he thought Bella’s name with uncomfortable warmth.Not ugly, I guess, he thought, still murmuring to himself, watching me this time. Skinny, long nosed, life-stealing monster. Cannot see Bella being into that.“I’m Edythe,” I said, remembering I was meant to be playing a role. Carlisle was waiting for my lead. I hadn’t let on to the pack last time that I could hear their thoughts. Their leader had turned into his human form to talk to us then. “This is Carlisle, my father. Esme, my mother.” I introduced the rest. “And you are?”Samuel Uley, the black wolf answered. And Jacob Black. Let’s get on with it.I repeated him again. Carlisle smiled, genuinely thrilled to be doing this. “Well, we can tell you what we know. We know there’s a vampire,” he said. “Drawing attention to themself. We’ve found no trail on our side of Forks, however, and by the time we investigated the scene of the first murders in the Park, it had rained. We lost the scent.”Two vampires, Samuel Uley informed us, and Jacob Black was smug that we hadn’t caught that. A male, a female.Samuel pictured flashes of their faces – a woman with wild red hair and a blonde man. I repeated the descriptions briefly for my family. “No, we don’t know them,” Carlisle said.There was a pause in which the pack exchanged troubled thoughts. What, she pulled the images from your head? Jacob Black thought to Samuel. What the hell can she hear? Everything?I nodded at him. “Yes, everything.”What does that mean? A bodiless voice queried.“I can hear your thoughts,” I told it, thinking it would be able to hear me so long as Jacob or Samuel were thinking into the pack mind. “Anything you’re thinking, anything anyone is thinking with a radius of about a mile. I can hear the rest of the – pack. But only what they project to you, here.”I decided to give them all the information I had. I knew it wouldn’t make them trust me, but I didn’t want them to think we were hiding anything. The bonded mind went silent as they adjusted to the new information. Above the silence was the non-stop chattering, getting louder now.“It sounds like someone is hurt,” I ventured.HearhearWhat’s going on?vampirehearbloodPaulsbloodIdidit –   We had a kid turn for the first time this morning, Samuel answered with plenty of disdain. A side effect of your kind on our lands. Do you know about the bloodlines?I nodded after repeating his words out loud for everyone. "We do."Legends didn’t say she could read minds, Jacob was thinking, still watching only me. How much did she get from them, without them knowing? Why didn’t he just kill them?“Maybe Ephraim anticipated this,” I said in answer. “We’re here to help. That is the point of a treaty.”He realized I was responding to his private thoughts a second later and snarled. Stay out of my head. Also: Prove it! How can you help?“I can read thoughts,” I told him. “My sister Alice has visions of the future.”Edythe, please! Jasper begged. Jacob cut his eyes doubtfully around. He’d forgotten which was Alice.She stepped forward, waving at the wolves with one hand. They observed her sparkle-laden eye makeup and smile with thick bemusement.“Her visions are subject to decisions made by the people involved,” I explained. “If I decided to put gas in my car tomorrow, she could see it now. If I decided not to, she would see that, too.”Alice smiled, taking my lead in disclosures. “And if we decided to come here, to this clearing, I wouldn’t be able to see anything at all. Something about you has…blinded me.”The wolves, now that they knew I really could read their thoughts, accepted Alice’s statement cautiously.“Don’t know why,” Alice shrugged, “But it’s why we didn’t notice the strays sooner. You were hunting them, so I’m blind to it.”“My brother Jasper also has a power,” I said flatly. “It’s less tangible.”Jasper considered refusing but gave in with a sigh as Alice sent him a pleading pout. “I can make people amenable,” he said reluctantly. Then, he did.The hackles on the wolves went down, their snarling eased up.Whoa! A distant voice exclaimed. It’s bad enough when Quil does it, guys! Wait, Jake, who’s ass were you just thinking about?I focused, alarmed on their behalf. Jasper’s calming effect had inadvertently caused their individual walls between personal thought and pack communication to lapse.Jesus, Sam, snap out of it! Another one thought.The wolves in front of us swung around to look at each other. They realized what was happening and Jacob dug his claws into the dirt, scraping a spray of mud into the air.Stop it! He yelled at me, alongside a deep growl.Jasper raised his hands in surrender, letting up on their emotions. He was pleased to have discovered a slight advantage. Sam shook like a wet dog. Jacob lowered his head at Jasper and growled with promise.“That’s the extent of it,” I said. “Now you know everything.”“Please,” Carlisle said. “Tell us how we can help you.”After a moment of struggle to lock up his thoughts from the bond again, Sam thought, We want them dead.I repeated this, and Carlisle’s hesitation caused Sam to give me something. He thought - very fast, too quickly for me to speak it out loud as it came - about a specific Quileute legend.“These vampires have killed here before,” I said in summation when he had finished. “Right...right before we came here, Carlisle. There was a slaughter. I remember – pre-settlement...”“I remember that, too,” Carlisle said, recalling what we had been told by the last pack. “They told us they killed one cold one, and that the others had fled...”He exchanged a look with me. We were both surprised these were the same vampires from before. This changed a few of our theories.Well, they’re back, Jacob thought. And so are you. He wondered if, when it came down to it, we wouldn’t choose our own kind over theirs.“That won’t happen,” I told him. “Forks is our home, and its people are our friends. A vampire hunting here wouldn’t be able to miss our presence, so they should know better.” I didn’t need to speak it out loud to Carlisle, but if the indiscriminate killing of humans didn’t subside, it was going to make news. And no one loved news more than the Volturi. “We have no choice but to eradicate them.”Jacob rolled his eyes. He noticed that I was doing all the talking. Likewise – I was confused why Samuel was leading the conversation.“Some of us just like a good fight,” Emmett piped up, giving the wolves a grin they found concerning.Shit, Jacob thought to the pack. I kind of believe him.Samuel seemed to agree. He turned his eyes to me and thought, suddenly and with force: In the beginning, earlier this year, they came straight for town twice. I got close to the woman once but lost her at the ocean. They didn’t come close again, but I found trails to the north of the reservation, past the airport. They never let me chase them toward Forks – they always turned for the ocean. When I had help, later, they would taunt us both north, but never got close. There weren’t any kills that I know of until the ones in Forks.I repeated him exactly. “And you’re certain they’ll come back?”I don’t know what they’re after, Sam admitted. Except to get past our guard and take out our people.I frowned at that. Carlisle did, too. “If they’re staying on reservation land,” he asked, “What can we do?”Sam hesitated. I’d like to revisit the terms of the treaty. Temporarily.Esme shifted her weight warily. We had not expected this.Don’t go rogue, Jacob thought to Samuel in attempted undertone. Billy will kill me if he finds out we did this without permission.We will withdraw the boundary of our land to its inhabited center, Sam thought.His decision rang with authority, and he ignored Jacob’s protest altogether. So he was the leader of their pack, biological imperatives be damned. Perhaps he was older. I wondered if Jacob was even legal yet.Sam continued. You have access to the forest. But you will avoid our people at all costs. You will not get closer than a half mile to any houses or other buildings. You won’t touch any of our wildlife.Carlisle nodded.Do this for us, Sam said, and we won’t consider it a breach of the original agreement that you have clearly bitten several humans since we last met. Or that you’ve brought the Swan girl into this.I repeated him inexactly and haltingly. “If we can help them, they’ll forgive you for breaking the treaty, Carlisle, with Rose and Emmett.”I didn’t mention Bella, a fact Jacob noticed shrewdly.“Agreed,” Carlisle said solemnly. “It shouldn’t take very long, at any rate. Once we take over, Alice should be able to see – ““They don’t want us to take over,” I interrupted, reading Sam’s projections. “They want us to patrol days only.”Carlisle adapted smoothly. “Days will be difficult. We need to keep up with our lives.”“You’re tired,” Jasper said, eliciting twin growls. “I feel it.”Carlisle saw his chance. “That’s not a problem for us,” he told Sam.There it is, someone said to the bonded mind. Jared, I thought, slowly picking up on the voices. They think we’re lazy.“We don’t sleep,” I explained. “We don’t get tired.”We have lives, too, Jacob thought to Sam argumentatively.“Graveyard shift doesn’t help me,” Alice said irritably. The rest of us went still, surprised at her outburst. “If you weren’t involved, we could have this finished in a few days. I would be able to see where these strays will be, as long as we’re already there.”That doesn’t make any goddamn sense, Jacob complained after a moment.“They’re involved, Alice,” Carlisle said simply, shooting her a look. “We’ll have to think of another way.”Fine, Sam thought, observing Alice thoughtfully. You can patrol nights. We’ll show you our routes, and you will not deviate from them. Unless you’re actively closing in on the rogues, we don’t want you here during the day.Carlisle nodded his agreement.How would we communicate? Jacob asked.I shrugged, remembering Bella’s suggestion. “We have cell phones.”Great, Jacob thought. You’re our mortal enemies. We’ll DM you on Twitter.Phones are fine, Sam thought shortly, thinking hard.Alice touched my arm. We’ll start tonight. You and me first, how’s that? Is Chief Swan going hunting?I nodded.
Maybe Esme can go watch him. Jasper will want to be with me, I’ll bet, and Rose and Emmett can break into the police station and see if that curfew is still going into effect...
She kept thinking, but I was distracted by Jacob.You should stay away from her, he thought, unmistakably in my direction. You’re a monster, and if she gets hurt, I’ll put you down. Treaty or not.I wished I knew what he looked like usually – as a boy. Without the benefit of a human face, I was left with the transience of his thoughts, which were quite serious. Bella had spoken about me, then. Just me, not my entire family.“Thank you,” Carlisle was saying, probably at a loss in my sudden silence. “We will see you this evening.”The wolves began backing toward the trees. They weren’t expecting us to do anything, but the proximity and scent of us was almost too much for their senses. I watched the glow of Jacob Black’s eyes until they had faded into the brush. 
 _____________________
 
Bella
Ten o’clock came and went, and I didn’t hear back from Alice. I guess I shouldn’t have expected to – she did say they would take it from here. I texted Jacob instead of her, although I was sure he wouldn’t answer. He had called me from a strange number that morning to plan the meeting.It wasn’t something they wanted, he told me, but early that morning Quil had turned for the first time. The first time was apparently the most traumatic, and it had happened because Quil sought out Paul and started a fight.“Paul’s fine,” Jake had told me. “I found him – I mean, he’s alive, but won’t be able to phase for a while...”Quil had evidently hit Paul with the full, uncontrolled force of his claws, and that meant they were down one of their pack. Jake hadn’t had time to talk to me about it, but I worried. I knew I couldn’t go to this big important meeting in the forest, but I didn’t even pretend I didn’t want to. It had nothing to do with me but I did know about it, didn’t I? I did have to deal with not being involved. It was boring.I texted Jake I hoped Paul was going to be okay, and that he better not have picked a fight with the Cullens.Restless, I cleaned the bathroom and finished my homework. I stared at a book without reading it and considered asking Angela or Jessica to come over. But I knew that wasn’t smart. I had managed to avoid Charlie because I knew he would know something was wrong. My friends probably would, too.Charlie was working. Edythe promised he would be safe. I curled into his armchair with a blanket and waited.
 _____________________
 
Edythe
I was eager to be one of the first on patrol. I held the far-off hope that we might catch them on the first night, though I knew that was delusional.“You would have to see if we encounter them a mile from now,” I reasoned as we set out toward the coastline. The sun rode low on the horizon, winking out gradually into a cold, wet night.“If we did, we would have to kill them,” Alice said. “And then we would have to tell the wolves right away. So, no, I don’t think so.”She took personal delight in my aggrieved frown. I was realizing I relied on Alice’s power almost as much as she did. I felt blind without her.“Fuck it, we’ll go analog,” Emmett said, running along behind us. We only needed two for a patrol, but he had insisted. “Oooh – hear that? Break right!”“Don’t come at them from behind,” Jasper barked. “You’ll startle them.” He had also insisted. I didn’t think it was likely he would leave Alice alone with the wolves at all, ever.The wolf ahead of us – young mind, angry and tired – was Jacob. I committed the scent we were following to memory, linking it to him. It was not so offensive to us as ours were to them, but something about it did put my teeth on edge.“It’s us!” Emmett shouted, sprinting past Alice and I as we slowed. Jacob stopped and turned to face us, only to have Emmett blow past him as top speed. “Race you!”Without any hesitation, Jacob followed him. Jasper cursed out loud.“Jazz, let them,” Alice commanded, leaning against a tree. “It’s just a bit of fun.”Not getting shown up by a Cullen on the first night, I heard Jacob think in the distance.“They’re already circling back,” I told Jasper. We listened to Emmett’s steps get louder and closer, and then he was overtaken by Jacob, who threw himself toward the clearing we had stopped in, crashing into a tree trunk and rolling twice before hopping to his feet.Emmett jogged into view. He threw his head back and laughed. “WHOOO!” He cried, pumping his fist in the air. “Hot damn, you guys are fast.”Likewise, Jacob thought, watching him warily. Fucking freaks.“Your tail is wagging,” I informed him. He exposed his teeth to me, but his tail fell still.“Are you all that fast?” Emmett asked, “Or is it just ‘cause you’re the Alpha?”Jacob’s low snarling stopped. His ears pricked up. I’m not the Alpha.I repeated him. “Then who is?” Emmett asked.
Sam.
“The black wolf?” Emmett asked. I nodded. “Huh. I guess. Aren’t you bigger?”Jacob did know what Emmett was referring to, but for some reason it made him anxious. He’s older, he told Emmett. What’s it matter?“How old are you?” Alice asked him.Seventeen, Jacob admitted, though he considered lying. He was getting very anxious, now, and he was so tired Jasper was feeling it. Just seventeen.“I can’t hear the other one anymore,” I noted. The babbling voice was gone, and I could feel Jacob was aware of another wolf in the bond, but whoever it was stayed quiet.Jacob didn’t try to hide his immense dislike of all of us, and me in particular. Mind your own business. I’ll show you the route. This way.It was a long, curving line up to the coast. I finally got to see the cliffs.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Edythe
I spent the weekend patrolling land I had never before been allowed on. The forest here wasn’t as wild as the Park, but the cliffs were beautiful. Esme and I found no strange vampire trails, and I never caught onto a mind, human or otherwise, until sunrise Monday when the boy named Jared came to relieve us.Jared Cameron wasn’t the largest wolf, but his sleek brown coat blended him seamlessly into the underbrush. He moved low to the ground, watching me distrustfully and repelling me with several profanities when I tried to make conversation by reading his mind. Emmett seemed to be having better luck.“They’re a little clumsy, sure, but once they get going… man,” Emmett said, one out of a long line of praises. Like a freakin’ bulldozer, that Jacob Black. Embry, too.“At least one of us is having fun,” Rosalie muttered, picking apart a sandwich. The lunchroom was quieter than usual, subdued. Everyone wanted to be outside in the fresh layer of snow. Everyone except Bella Swan, that was. I didn’t need to be in her mind to know that.Rosalie’s attention moved to a point over my shoulder. Why don’t they both just sit over here?
Her reversal of opinion of Bella – antagonistic to reluctantly interested – was worth investigation, but I was actively avoiding searching for answers there. It had all potential to be utterly disturbing.
“This final paper is going to kill me,” Jessica Stanley said behind me. “Have you started the book yet, Alice?” Ugh, I have to find out what she puts on her skin. She's so pretty. And way nicer than the other ones.She thought of me and Rosalie as equally rude and condescending, which was just offensive. Alice laughed. “I haven’t even read the book yet.”“The prospectus is due next Monday!”“I’m sure I’ll think of something.”At Jessica and Mike’s incredulous expressions, Bella pursed her lips against a smile. Alice shared it with her, and I resisted the urge to turn around. I hadn’t spoken to Bella since Friday.“It’s not supposed to be fun,” Jasper said, picking up Rosalie’s thread. “You’ve never killed anyone.”Emmett cleared his throat.“Not another vampire,” Jasper amended. “It’s not going to be fun. Or easy. They won’t let us get near them.”Jasper didn’t know this; he was just being tactical. Samuel Uley said he didn’t know what they were after. What if they aren’t after anything?We had been talking about it all weekend, drawing up short at all the same obstacles. “If they aren’t after something, then it’s a game,” I said, playing along. “Which is not good for us.”“No.” Jasper stabbed his fork down into his pasta. “Not good.”“Well, I don’t see why it can’t be fun,” Emmett said. “I’d kill just to see one of them actually go after one of us. I mean, their teeth!”“Let’s not test that theory,” Rosalie said.“I really hoped it would be over within the week,” I mused. Now, knowing the pack were not going to step aside and let Alice work, I feared it would be much longer. Two long, uneventful patrols had lessened my optimism.Doing my best over here! Alice thought from across the room.“She did see them,” Emmett said. “For, like, a second.”Jasper nodded. “But not when or where. It’s useless when we have this agreement with the pack.”The pack was very intent on keeping up some patrol. They didn’t trust us, and I didn’t blame them. They just didn’t understand how their partial pretense was still cutting Alice out.Yeah, I think I have an idea about that, Alice thought deviously. Now, shh! I’m socializing.She focused on talking to Angela Weber, who I briefly tuned into. She had a very warm regard for Bella that surpassed even her years-long friendship with Jessica. It showed good judge of character, I thought.“Alice said stop talking strategy without her.”“Then what shall we talk about?” Rosalie fixed me with an expectant look. “Trouble in paradise?”I felt my jaw spasm as I clenched it. Rosalie taking such obvious glee in my feelings was only marginally better than her castigating me for them. “Paradise?”“I don’t know what else to call what happened at the benefit,” she said innocently. “Kismet, maybe?”“I call it upchuck,” Emmett said, wrinkling his nose.Rosalie flicked a piece of meat at him. “I meant the flirting.”The word made me feel queasy. “She was drunk," I reasoned out loud, because there was no use denying it. Flirting had occurred. I couldn’t even say it was all on her end, either. “And acting out.”“What’s the difference?” Emmett asked, grinning at Rose. She grinned back, and I did my best to tune out whatever was going through their heads, focusing instead on Bella’s heartbeat. I’d gotten to the point of being able to discern hers from any crowd. It was strong, as usual. Nearly melodic. When it sped up a considerable amount, I glanced over my shoulder without thought, embarrassingly curious to see what had her so excited.Our eyes met. Bella was looking at me, her silver irises turned dark against the fluorescent lights, holding mine with such a ferocious intensity that my limbs went numb with desire. The bell rang, and I avoided Jasper’s eyes as I rushed into the snow.There was nobody behind the gym, so I fled there to lean against the brick wall and breathe. I was uneasy, and it had nothing to do with what was going on in the forests of Forks. It was right here, presumably waiting for me in Biology.I pushed my hair back, considering skipping class. Her scent always affected me, and I was managing it, but I didn’t want to take any chances with…this. Everything was loose and tight at the same time. A hunger I had never felt before that no blood would satisfy.My hands weren’t shaking, but I was unsure enough to check. I’d never felt like this as a vampire – like my body was acting on its own. There was the thirst, always, but this was different. This was in my head, my fingertips, somewhere in the center of my chest. All from the simple and unexpected contact of eyes from across a crowded lunchroom. Give it a few more weeks and the mere suggestion of Bella would have me in hysterics.Temperature-less flakes of snow fell against my skin. I turned my face up to them, wondering at this unprecedented sense of distraction. Dark hair curling under my fingers. A warm body, solid and soft and smelling of champagne. A navy-blue sleeve slipping over a brown shoulder.The goddamned benefit. I had touched Bella that night – I had carried her and been near her and felt her warmth on my chest. Thank God Alice wasn’t the mind reader. She’d have a field day with my memories, and how often I had been replaying them.When I thought I could pull it together enough to seem normal, I pushed off the wall and stalked to class. I could hear Mike with her, leering over our lab table in all his sycophantic glory, and I wanted to put his severed head on a pike.“You should’ve come out with us this weekend,” he was saying as I approached. “It was a good movie.”“That’s okay, I – “ She caught sight of me lingering in the doorway and faltered, clearing her throat. My skin prickled. “I hung out with my dad, when he wasn’t working, you know?”“That sounds boring. I’m sorry.” She could have sat next to me. Jessica talks too much, anyway.Bella fixed him with a gratifyingly sharp look. “It wasn’t, actually.”I sat down, and, to make myself feel less unbalanced and terrified, smiled at Mike. His face went slack with surprise, mind instantly lighting up with long-forgotten thoughts about me. When he realized he could no longer speak coherently, he cleared his throat.“I’ll talk to you later, Bella.”I gave her the same smile when she turned around suspiciously. It was easy and natural, smiling at her, and had a much stronger effect; her heart rate sped up again and she took a deep breath that drifted warm and humid against my face.“Well?” She asked. “Am I allowed to ask how it’s going?”I inhaled for the first time, letting her scent set me aflame all over again. It was different now, I noted, letting my eyes drift down over her full lips. Headier, sweeter, fuller. Was the difference all in my head? It didn’t seem possible.“It’s...frustrating,” I allowed, glancing back at Mike. He saw me looking and dropped his eyes to his textbook guiltily. I should have done that sooner – he hadn’t thought about Bella in almost ten seconds. “It will continue to be frustrating.”Bella nodded and chewed on her lower lip, derailing just about every thought in my head. I really feared the day she realized her power over me, because she was doing a lot on accident. “You met Jacob! What did you think?”“Like I said. Frustrating.” I busied myself getting my book from my backpack. “I don’t think he likes me very much.”“Did he say that?” Her brow wrinkled with worry. It didn’t bode well for me that Jacob’s opinion was so important to her. I’d tried to be nice, but he was too ready to hate me. I nearly felt the same. I feared his reasoning ran parallel to my own. I didn’t want to admit it, even to myself, but Jacob Black had unnerved me. Just the way he thought Bella’s name was protective, possessive. It was too complex for me to have unraveled during our short interactions, but there was something there. Something that gave me pause.“He thought it,” I said.“Well, I feel safe saying that you can both be a little frustrating.”Being compared to Rosalie and Jacob Black all in one day. I thought maybe I should look into some serious self-reform. “You talk to Alice too much.”“She doesn’t give me much choice. You know, you could sit with us at lunch if you wanted to. I think the shock has worn off regarding Alice, but you would freak them out.”“I’d rather it was you, if one of us is moving. Emmett likes you, and it would upset Rosalie,” I added, knowing she was listening in from her English class. Intentionally or not, all of my family was able to hear us, if they wanted to listen. Mike could only watch, but he was concerned. I looked at his perception of us with surprise – we leaned in close, faces inches apart. It was just on the edge of indecent, and he still had it all wrong. Idiot.Bella shuddered delicately. “Too intimidating.”“You’d be safe with me,” I murmured, heedless of my audience.“I’ll think about it,” Bella said, smiling. Her heart was racing.Banner dimmed the lights, booting up the VHS player yet again. I broke away from Bella’s orbit, forcing my body toward the front of the classroom. The strangeness of my body was continuing. Feeling utterly ridiculous, I actually checked my forehead for sweat. There was nothing. Obviously. I ran through our conversation in my head and cringed at my every word.Something would have to give. I would die of this strange heat before the school year was over, and after that…I sighed, putting a hand over my face. After the school year, Bella would leave. Alice had seen the smallest glimpses of where, but she was definitely going. One possible future was Florida, on a sunny campus. I would lose her, then – not that I had her, but the possibility would be permanently disappeared.“Are you okay?” Bella whispered, minty breath warming my ear. Something close to a shiver drove itself violently up my back. I moved my chair away, getting an alarmed look.“Fine,” I whispered, and my voice broke. She turned forward, and I put a hand to my throat, shocked again. That wasn’t supposed to happen. I was sure it never had before.Time dragged. I spent the remainder of the class focusing on the video and carefully cataloguing every inch of my body. Could vampires develop movement disorders? Had my cerebellum been damaged in a play fight with Jasper?I’d always thought the only thing my body would betray me for was blood. I still wanted it, of course. That was a given. And I could always control it until Bella. She broke something loose with her scent, made me second-guess myself for the first time in decades. This was now cascading, calling forth other wants. Simple ones, like wanting to put Newton and Black through a wall. And much more complicated ones, like getting Bella somewhere dark and quiet, and… And that was where I drew a blank. After a century of sleep, my body was awake and demanding, and I had no clue what to do with it. _____________________ 
Bella
I wouldn’t be seeing Edythe or Alice outside of school any time soon, I supposed. At least Alice’s scheming seemed to be at a standstill. I was left with Angela and, in my loneliest moments, Jessica. They were both fun to be around. It was just, and I felt horrible even thinking it, a little boring.My hour with Edythe during Bio was the highlight of every day that week. I had had crushes before, of course, but not like this. Every time she looked at me my entire body tingled, and I started to leave Bio feeling nauseous from all the butterflies in my stomach. We didn’t even really talk that much – she gave me brief updates on their joint patrols and informed me that Jacob and the others still hated her very much.Jacob, in a rare text at one in the morning on Tuesday, confirmed this by saying simply, I hate her. She sucks.What did she even do? I responded.
Walks into my brain and acts like she owns the place. I don’t know how you can stand her.
I didn’t think Edythe was doing anything wrong – Jake was just sensitive ever since I gave their message. Ever since this all started, really. He was struggling with it, and I felt bad for not being able to help.Charlie was home when I arrived after school on Wednesday. I had barely seen him since the weekend.“Hey, dad,” I said. He was at the kitchen table with his work laptop and a cup of coffee. He didn’t look good. “Everything okay?”He took his time before responding to me, sighing deeply. “Two more bodies today.”I lowered my backpack to the floor, stunned. “More hikers?”“No,” he said, “not hikers. There was a car pulled off of the 101 Northbound, lights on, door open…few people noticed it and called it in. One of our cars went up to investigate…”“And?”He looked up from his screen at me. “There was a trail of blood. The bodies had been dragged about a hundred feet into the tree line, and…” he shrugged, speechless.“Bear?” I asked hoarsely.“Something.” He sighed again and rubbed his hand over his face. “Bella, I’ve had to tell three different families that their loved ones were torn to shreds. I can’t – I can’t help but think maybe now wasn’t the best time for you to stay here.”I blinked away my shock, absorbing that last part. “What?”“It’s not that I – you know how much I...” he shook his head. “I’ve heard of some kids getting the idea to go running around the woods with their parents’ guns, looking for glory.”“What kids are you talking about?”“I’m not sure. One of the deputies said it was on Facebook.”Facebook. So it had about a 30% chance of being valid, probably less. “Dad, I’m not a complete idiot. I wouldn’t do that. Neither would Jess and Ang.”“I know that,” he said. “I do.”"I’ll be careful, I promise,” I told him. I hated that I couldn’t mention I was probably safer than most of the people in Forks, just by virtue of all the supernatural creatures being my friends. “I – I won’t go out after dark.”“I don’t want you to feel trapped here,” Charlie said.The barely concealed emotion in his voice hit me in the gut. “I don’t feel trapped. I love it here.”“Do you?” He asked sharply, like he was going to catch me in a lie.“Yes.” And it was the truth. “You couldn’t get rid of me if you tried.”Forks had proven to be the most interesting place I’d ever been, by far. I couldn’t leave Jacob, or Edythe and Alice, or any of my other friends. The friendships here had something I’d never encountered before, though I wasn’t sure of what. Not quite yet. I couldn’t leave.“I just – “ he gave me a careful look. “I’ve tried to talk to Billy about this, about telling Jake to stay inside as much as possible. He’s got mono, now, but I know he and his friends get out there and mess around outside. I know you want to be with him, but...”His phrasing made me roll my eyes. “Dad – Jake is my friend, but I’m not going to freak out because I don’t see him for a few weeks. Or however long this takes.” Hopefully less than a few weeks. “Are you still looking for it?” I asked. “The bear, I mean.”“Of course we are,” he said, frowning. “But you don’t need to worry about us. We’ve got teams of four and 30-06s.”“Okay,” I said, trying not to roll my eyes at the gun speak. I decided I would have to cancel my plans with Angela, at least for tonight. “Who died?”Charlie shook his head. “No one I know. We’re still running the plates. Jefferson County”I knew it was evil to be relieved – just because Charlie didn’t know the dead didn’t mean they were less dead. Someone somewhere was going to grieve.I hid in my room to call Alice.“We already know,” she said when she answered.“But – ““It was out of our range, maybe purposefully so. And no, I didn’t see it coming. Was there anything else?”She was angry. I hadn’t heard her like that before. “No. Sorry.”“See you tomorrow,” she said. The line went dead._________________But Alice didn’t sit with us at lunch the next day. She sat with her family, and I ate in distracted quiet. Everyone was buzzing about the new murders, and I caught Eric saying something extremely stupid.“You did what?” I asked, cutting into their conversation.Eric grinned at me. “Got trail cams. We’re gonna put them up all over the highway – ““Eric,” I said, “do not go fucking around in the woods.”His smile wavered, turned bemused. “What?”“People are being torn to pieces out there and you getting yourself killed for a YouTube video is going to make everything worse.”“Okay, Bella,” he said, holding out a placating arm. “Sorry I struck a nerve.”“Put your hand down, Eric. It’s not funny.”Everyone had gone very quiet, and not just at our table. I felt my face flare with embarrassed heat. Mike’s eyes were wide as saucers.“I agree,” Jessica said, turning to Eric. “You don’t even know how to shoot a gun.”“Yes, I do!”I grabbed my backpack, ignoring Jessica calling my name. I just needed to get out of the room, even if it meant subjecting myself to the freezing cold. I didn’t dare look at the Cullens’ table, but it didn’t matter because by the time I was halfway to the parking lot Edythe was right next to me.“You dissuaded him,” she said. “He’s heartbroken.”I stopped at the edge of the walkway, under an awning. It was snowing, again. Every car tire in the lot glistened with chains. “Good.”Edythe watched me. “We’re getting closer. I promise.”“Really?”She nodded. “The crime scene, the car…their trails crossed right over ours. Faded, from a few days ago, but unmissable.”“What does that mean?”“It means that they know, without a doubt, that we are here. And they still won’t come to us.”“So?”She stepped closer, hands in her coat pockets. “Whatever they want from the Quileutes, whatever game they’ve been playing…we just made it more exciting.”“That doesn’t sound good.”Edythe shook her head. “Listen, I know which of our cohort are planning acts of bravery, and I’ll handle it. You don’t even need to yell at them.”“Oh!” I covered my face with my hands and sat on the nearest bench, which was a little like sticking my ass into a vat of liquid nitrogen. Everything was cold here. “I hate being that person. I never want to be that person.”“What person?”“Yelling at people for fucking around. Total cop daughter move.”“And what is that?”I scrubbed my hand down my face, looking at her. “Having a cop for a dad is…a lot. I mean, people here aren’t so – they don’t seem to…care? In Phoenix they would have. I did. I do.”“You care?” Edythe asked, tilting her head. “Oh. You disagree.”“…Yeah? Maybe. But that’s – it’s whatever. I’m just on edge.”“Nobody thinks badly of you,” Edythe said. “Literally, not a single person.”“No way is that the truth, and I’d appreciate if you stopped lying.”“That’s what I thought, at first,” she said, and rushed on before I could ask her to elaborate. “But they all just think you’re worried about your father. They get it. Eric is sorry. But I should probably let him say that.”I laughed sourly. “Thanks.”She shook her head. “Come on,” she said, standing. “We can go over our notes before class. There’s a pop quiz today.”___________________ The next day, while Edythe and I were comparing notes after Bio lecture, I asked her, “So, what do you do all night?”She scrubbed out something incorrect on my paper with her eraser. “We run a perimeter around the reservation, searching for new trails.”“How many times?”“Last night I made forty laps.”I waited patiently for her to finish writing in my notebook. She looked up and was wary at my expression. “What?”“Laps around what? Not the reservation.”Edythe nodded.“How far is that?”“Maybe…forty miles. Ish,” she said, lowering her voice.That was bigger than I was even imagining. I leaned in. “How fast are you?”She glanced down, smirking ever so briefly. “I’ve been clocked at about 85.”“Miles per hour?”“Yes,” she whispered back.“That’s…”“…why I drive fast,” she finished, erasing a doodle I’d drawn over a diagram. “Though with your truck, I can see why speed terrifies you.”It wasn’t the first time she had spared a few nasty words for my car.“I’m not indestructible,” I reminded her. “And, again, cop daughter.”Edythe smiled absently, jotting notes so quickly and in so perfect a hand that my writing looked childish by comparison. “It’s going to catch on if you keep saying it. Also, it is vestigial, not vestigal.”“It’s my shorthand,” I joked, pulling my notebook back. It was all crisscrossed with erasures and sharp little notes of things that Edythe had already had to tell me throughout the semester. I had an A in the class – all of my classes – but evidently my notetaking was sloppy. Her hand brushed mine as she handed my pencil back, which was always a shock.I jumped, and Edythe’s smile dropped away. “Sorry.”I was mostly just frustrated than anytime I touched her, the shocking temperature kept my brain from registering what she felt like. Even now, my hand just sort of burned with cold like I had stuck my dry hand against an ice cube. “It’s okay,” I said. “I can’t be much warmer.”Edythe made a little face at that, and I wondered what I’d said. Unlike the beginning of the year, however, I wasn’t as fearful of her outright dismissing me, or her little ‘aren’t you so stupid’ smirks. This face was different, like an accident.No matter the reason, she was careful not to touch me for the rest of class._______________________ Saturday, while Charlie was out hunting (with, Alice informed me, Emmett watching over him), Jacob showed up at my house.The knock on the door frightened me, then excited me, and ultimately I was the slightest bit disappointed it was him.“What’s wrong?” I asked immediately.“Stop asking that. When something’s wrong, you’ll know.” He leaned against the doorframe, hair windblown, shirtless, his bare chest sort of…glistening. There was no car in the driveway, so I guessed he had run to my house.“You’re supposed to have mono right now,” I pointed out.“Can I come in or what?”I stepped aside for him. “Do you think there’s anything more you could do to make Charlie think we’re dating? Maybe throw some empty condom wrappers on the ground?”“Got a shirt I could borrow, please?” He asked with exaggerate politeness. “I know he’s not here. Bloodsuckers told us.”“This way.” I led him up the stairs. “What’s going on?”“Nothing. Literally, nothing.”Luckily, I had a large enough stock of men’s clothing that we didn’t need to break into Charlie’s closet. I dug up something old and baseball-y of Phil’s, faded green. It barely fit across Jacob’s shoulders.“Gee, thanks,” he said, pulling at the collar unthankfully. He looked down at the books on my bed. “Do you actually do homework on the weekends?”I didn’t comment, letting him look around my room at his leisure. He seemed to feel safer doing it now that I was actually here to supervise. He stopped at the corkboard hung over the dresser, where I’d stuck a collection of photos. Mostly of Renée and myself, scattered with old friends and artwork or whatever. There wasn’t much else to look at, besides the bookshelf and the stacked schoolwork by the window. He spun my desk chair around and sat with a sigh.“Sorry for the drop-in. I can’t remember where I left my phone.”I sat on the bed. “It’s okay. I don’t mind.”Jake looked tired. There were bags beneath his eyes like the ones beneath Charlie’s, and his leg bounced beneath his crossed arms. He didn’t meet my eyes and seemed to be holding back a sneeze. Or tears.“Talk to me?” I asked hopefully, patting the mattress. “You can lay down if you promise you don’t have ticks.”He eyed my bed suspiciously. “Nah. If I lay down, I’ll pass out and then you’ll really have a problem when Charlie gets home.”“Are you hungry?”He shook his head, frowning, the bouncing knee slowing by degrees until his shoulders slumped. “The leeches offered to patrol today. Because they were out already with your dad. Sam accepted.”“Okay?”“I just can’t stand being around the guys anymore. All day, every day. It’s gonna drive me fucking insane, dude.”“What did Paul do?” I asked, cutting to the chase. Jake leaned back, stretching his body into a line – my desk chair screeched in protest – and closed his eyes.“He’s still healing from the Quil thing. Being an asshole about it.” He slumped even lower in my poor chair. “He can’t go home, either so we’ve been at Emily’s, and we’re still running patrol but…”He stopped and looked at me, like he said something wrong. I frowned right back at him.“…we’ve been stuck in the house, that’s all. I can’t get away from him.”“Why can’t you go home?”“What?” He looked genuinely confused. I guessed that wasn’t the part of his statement I wasn’t meant to know.“Wait…what do you mean you’re still running patrol?”His dark eyebrows twitched. He opened his mouth, but no sound came out at first. “Did I say that?”“Yeah, just now.”“Oh.” He looked troubled by that. “I shouldn’t have.”“What?”“I mean, I can’t talk about it. Alpha command.”“You can only hint?”“I shouldn’t have been able to say that,” he moaned and leaned back again. “Fuuuuck.”“Jake, I’m completely lost.”He gazed at my ceiling. “I can’t go home,” he mumbled, “because my dad’s a dick. You don’t wanna hear about it.”“Of course I do.”“No, seriously. I just – Between him and Paul I don’t know where to go. Even just to sleep.”I highly doubted that Billy had actually kicked Jacob out of the house. “You can always come here. Even if it is just to sleep.”He shook his head. “I really don’t think your dad would like that shit.”“If he knew – “He waved his hand. “Not even worth it. He’s too tight with my dad to understand.”“I could sneak you in.”He smiled ruefully. “Yeah, and that might even be nice, but I definitely couldn’t sleep in here.”“Why not?”He sniffed. “I just hope you know what you’re doing.”I made my face into a question mark, an angry one.“C’mon!” Jake said. “I can smell it clear as day.”I frowned at him, and blushed. “Edythe has not been in my room, not since the benefit.”“The nose doesn’t lie.”“You’re…sitting on my sweater,” I pointed out. “I wore it yesterday. She was at school.”He didn’t look convinced. “How can you stand the mind reading? It’s so…annoying. She is annoying. You could do better.”“Edythe can’t read my mind,” I told him, ignoring the rest.“Why?”“I have no idea. Neither does she.”He narrowed his eyes at me. “And you believe that? You don’t think it’s a little convenient?”“I don’t think Edythe would lie to me, no. What did she do to make you so mad?”“One, she doesn’t have to do anything, Bella. You keep forgetting that they are literal monsters who suck blood. Two,” he threw up a finger. “She’s just so smug about the fact that she’s in all of our heads.”I was genuinely glad I didn’t need to know what that felt like. “She is a little smug.”He shook his head. “It’s exhausting, being around her. Trying to juggle your thoughts, the pack thoughts, thoughts you want her to hear…”“Well, I think she’s…interesting.”“You have a giant boner for her.”“Jake!”“It’s true! You can’t see past your disgusting teenage urges.”“You can’t see past your disgusting werewolf ego!” I shouted back, then recanted. “I’m sorry. You’re not disgusting.”He was laughing at me. “You like a vampire.”“You like a wolf-man,” I said, in case he had forgotten.He sighed heavily again. “And we’re a couple’a suckers for it.”__________________________  Edythe   It had occurred to me that the clarity with which my sister had seen my future curling around Bella’s was now seriously impeached by the wolves and all they entailed.The wolf pack, through whatever genetic – or, as Rosalie thought, magical – advancement that glittered in the veins of this tribe, was a type of beast perfectly matched to my type. The wolves were glorious in their complexity, deadly in their preternatural attunement to the vampire pheromone. Their eyes missed nothing we did, their teeth stayed bared, snarls ripping out at the slightest twitch of a finger. Their thick fur ranged from black to snowy ash, their eyes a uniform mahogany. The minds inside – a shifting, multi-faceted thunderstorm of thought and emotion – were teenaged, self-conscious, egoistic, assured, scared. Their wolf-bodies shielded this vulnerability by linking them all – somehow – to each other. It was a closed circuit, a form of communication that was untested but deadly in a fight.Jacob Black stood apart. It wasn’t just that he was the largest, or that he had a unique dislike for me while seeming to entertain Emmett and Rosalie. He was just good at not thinking what I wanted him to think. Our interactions were brief, and I didn’t have time to examine him as I would have liked. I still wasn’t even certain what he looked like – Emmett had seen him, once, but he could only recall musculature and height. He was tall, with hair as dark as Bella’s and rivaling hers in length.He did not like me. He didn’t like my relationship with Bella, or what he perceived that relationship to be, and wasn’t afraid to say it. But he also, more than the other teen wolves, had a strong, disciplined control over the direction of his thoughts. At least for short periods. At least, around me. My family was good at directing their thoughts into channels less obvious to me, but they had the benefits of the vampiric mind – expansive and less prone to emotional dissidence. Jacob had been thrown into a cesspool of hormones and masculinity that enveloped his own, broadcast for his cohort to see if he wasn’t careful enough. I suspected his involvement with the one named Paul had led to his forced suppression of personal thoughts. I only wished this suppression didn’t extend to his thoughts of Bella.Stop fuckin’ staring at me, Jacob thought. His feet scraped at the soft earth of the forest floor, but he did not shake or snarl at us. He had a control the others did not – he was the pack leader, just like Ephraim, although they all deferred to the oldest one, Sam. That was probably sensible.Let it go, said a voice in Jacob’s head. Quil Ateara, the newest one. Sam said not to pick fights.“Go home, man,” Emmett said, tired of the stand-off between us. “Relax. We got this.”
Sure you do. And I’ve got ancestors breathing down my neck wondering why we let a bunch of leeches run around our sacred land.
Jacob meant for me to repeat this. I didn’t. I was thinking of the long-extinct dire wolves who had once lived in the Ohio River valley in Prehistoric America. Their skeletons were so big it baffled scientists.“We’ll go until two,” Emmett said, clapping his hands together. “Carlisle and Esme will go until sunrise, then it’s back to you.”At least when she’s here she’s not with her, Jacob thought quickly, and my attention focused, but he didn’t dwell on Bella. Fine. Have so much fun out here. It’s supposed to get down below freezing all night.“We don’t get cold,” I told him. “Thank you for your concern.”He rolled his eyes – a quite unsettling reaction in a canine skull – and sprinted South in a small explosion of dirt and leaves.“You ready?” Emmett asked, getting into a starting pose. “First to the beach wins?”I nodded wearily. Whenever the season called for a farther hunting trip – we didn’t like to overfish, so to speak, the local fauna – I enjoyed going with Emmett. Multi-day trips did get lonely, and Emmett appealed to my competitive nature. He would not hesitate to take down a mountain lion just so I couldn’t have it. Hunting with Jasper was difficult – I had to listen to his inherent dissatisfaction with animal blood, and he berated himself for putting that on me.This was patrol, not hunting, and we were forbidden from killing any animals, anyway, but we could compete by racing. I was faster, but Emmett had more raw power for making leaps. This occupied me for a while, but he beat me to the ocean on our third pass and stopped.“What’s wrong?” He asked. I can’t even enjoy this.I resumed our path Northeast, going just slow enough for him to keep pace. It would probably be better to get it off my chest now, when we were truly alone. I wouldn’t dare ask Rosalie or Alice. Esme was a no-go for obvious reasons, and Jasper was more awkward about it than I was. Emmett was the safest bet; however difficult he would make it.“You and Rose,” I said. “How – how is it?”“Pretty good right now,” he said into the wind, jumping over a fallen tree trunk. “She was kind of in a mood for a while, but I think she’s over it.” Weird question.Rain blasted past me, wind whistled in my ears and tree trunks shot past inches from my shoulders. I could still hear his voice just fine. And he’d missed my meaning entirely.“I meant... ” I had to force the words out. “I meant physically.”Emmett’s mind fell quiet in surprise, but he didn’t laugh. Physically?I knew it was a mistake, but I pressed on. “I’ve…never. I just want to understand what it’s…”
What it’s like?
“Yes.”He did laugh, then, but only a little. You want the sex talk? Oh man, do I have so much to teach you.“Shut up and listen,” I snapped. “Recently, I’ve…. it’s like I’m short circuiting.”“Huh?” Emmett asked. Is this you trying to describe what being horny is like?When I didn’t answer, he ran over and stopped in front of me. “For Bella?”I skidded to a stop, wanting to deny it but knowing it was pointless. “I think so.”Emmett backed up a few steps. “Right on. Never? Really?”I shrugged, already irritated. “It’s not like it was a priority in my human life.”“I know you left for a while, before I got here,” he said uncertainly. “Me and Rose go away sometimes. I never thought about it.”“I didn’t leave on a sex spree,” I muttered, not wanting to revisit the dark days. He chuckled.“I just thought you would know more than anyone.” Mind reader and all.“Believe it or not, the rest of our family thinks about sex much less often than you do.”He grinned. “But they still think about it. And what about all those kids at school?”“I don’t listen! And stop thinking I’m a prude. Post-Victorian Chicago was a lot different than Tennessee.” I shifted my weight uncomfortably. “Regardless, hearing it and experiencing it are proving very different things.”He nodded slowly, thoughts turning to Rosalie. “I did okay as a human. I would have thought I’d seen it all, but…”He got a stupid look on his face; one I was unfortunately very familiar with. It was why I’d asked him in the first place. I was assaulted by the image of Rosalie on her back, stark naked, Emmett’s eyeline moving down between her thighs. I struggled through the uneasiness to try and take it for what it was; Emmet’s version of advice.“Seems like a lot of work for a pretty face,” I couldn’t help saying. It was pure reflex to insult her, even though I couldn’t deny the…objective appeal. I’d always thought of it as her vampiric gift – physical perfection to make up for an intensely repellant personality."I could think about it all day – you know I could,” he said. “But I don’t think that’s gonna be your problem. The problem is that Bella’s a human.”It would be easy to believe that’s all it was. Maybe, if she was like me, this would all be second nature. But she wasn’t, and there were a lot of aspects about that that I had yet to consider.I looked at the rain pooling around our feet. “Have you ever thought about how fragile they all are? How many bad things could happen?”He quirked an eyebrow. What’s the use in thinking like that?“What if Rose was a human? She could run into a bear or get in car crash. And when was the last time you watched the news? Burglaries, homicides…” And worse things. Things that had very nearly happened to Bella already had Alice not intervened in Port Angeles. I was so abruptly infuriated at the idea of another human hurting her that I couldn’t speak.“She lives in Forks,” Emmett said bluntly. “She gets rained on.”“Forks,” I agreed. “The one town in America where vampires and werewolves make up a significant part of the population. And she has ingratiated herself with both of them.”Jesus, he thought. You are cup half empty personified.I didn’t answer, stewing in my own worry. It was Saturday, a rest day. I pictured Bella curled in her bed, wrapped in blankets and her own unique warmth. She was going to Angela Weber’s house tomorrow, which made me nervous for other reasons. Angela had begun to notice my staring at Bella in school.“Look.” Emmett had gone serious. “If Rose was human, we couldn’t have been together. Not in her time, or mine. If she was human, no one would have bitten me.” It’s no use thinking about what-ifs. We have what we have. And you have a shot at something real. Don’t let the small stuff stop you.I stared at him, nonplussed but touched. “Small stuff?”
I don’t know why you didn’t just go to Tanya. Isn’t this her whole deal?
“Fuck,” I muttered. Tanya. “I actually think I owe her an apology.”“For what?”She had been right, all these years. She had even been right about Bella. And I’d bitten her head off for it. “Just something I said. Anyway, she would be far too gleeful that I’d asked.”That was that, mostly. Discussing those particular fears felt hubristic when I was not even sure there were measures to take. My thoughts returned to Jacob Black – whose future Alice could not see. The visions of bliss that she had shown me – that I had subconsciously been relying upon – might only be echoes, one future of many, most of which Alice was no longer able to account for. 
 ___________________
 Bella  Angela’s house was a ranch-style mixture of pale brick and neatly kept shrubbery not very far from the school. She had two little twin brothers with matching bowl cuts that ran out to my truck and held me at Nerf-point until their father, Pastor Ron, ran out and saved me. He apologized to me until Angela came to save me from him. We hid in her room on the far side of the house and started the first movie on our list – The Scarlet Letter, starring Demi Moore.About ten minutes in, Angela rolled on her bed to face me. “You seem anxious.”I mirrored her, turning. “I’m not anxious.”She tucked her hands beneath her face, watching me. “You keep checking your phone. Which is fine.”I dropped my phone guiltily, pushing it under the blankets. I had made a habit of glancing at my phone for texts from Alice, not that she had texted me even once since the morning. “Sorry.”“You don’t have to talk about it,” Angela said. “But I’m here if you want to.”I found that I did want to talk about it. I just didn’t know what exactly ‘it’ was. So I just said: “I’ve got this friend who…who I’m worried about.”“Who is it?”I wasn’t sure what name I would say until I said, “Jacob.”“Oh.” Angela’s eyes widened. “Is he okay?”“Yes. But he’s going through some stuff, and…I just worry.” I was also worried about Charlie. And the Cullens. And Embry and Quil and the rest – even Paul. “I don’t think I can do anything to help him. At least, not right now.”“That would make me anxious, too,” Angela said quietly. “He seemed really sweet when we met him at the beach. You two are getting close, huh?”“Yeah, I guess so.” I talked about him a lot at school. “He’s really, really cool.”We lapsed into quiet for a while, watching Demi and Gary Oldman dance around each other. “You know,” Angela murmured, “when you said you were worried about a friend, I thought you would say Edythe Cullen.”My stomach lurched hearing Edythe’s name where I hadn’t expected it. “What? Why?”“I don’t mean to pry, I’m just curious, but it seems like you and her are getting close, too.”I was a little bit dumbfounded. I never talked about Edythe around my other friends – not since they had made such a big deal of the concert. If anything, I would have thought Angela would ask me about Alice. “Um…”“I just wonder if you notice the way she looks at you,” Angela said. My stomach lurched further.“What do you mean?”“During lunch, she’s always looking over her shoulder at you. And in class, it’s like…I don’t know.”“What is it like?” I asked, more insistent. Angela turned to me again, surveying me.“It’s very intense, I think. Almost…possessive. But not in a bad way.”I felt my heart pounding and was glad there were no vampires around. I didn’t know at all what to say, or if Angela would…“For what it’s worth,” she said, not looking at me, “I would never judge anyone on who they liked. Even if I am the pastor’s daughter.”Something unexpected blocked my throat. “Um…I’m not…”Angela waited, chewing her lip nervously.“Okay,” I said, taking a leap. “Yeah, maybe. But we’re not…it’s not anything like that.”“Okay,” Angela said. “It’s just something I noticed.”She turned back to the movie like it was nothing. I pretended to watch, too, shaken by the turn in conversation, unsure if I had just come out to her or not.“I’m still waiting on my college applications to come back,” she said at one point. “It’s killing me not to know.”College applications. I seized on the topic. “You’ve already applied?”“To a few places, but U-Dub is my first choice. I’m positive Jess will get in, so we might be roommates if I make it.”“U-Dub?”“University of Washington,” she corrected herself, looking up. “In Seattle. You should apply soon, if you plan on going to college. Most early deadlines are before January.”I had known, in the back of my mind, that I should start thinking about college. I just had no idea where I wanted to go. Neither of my parents had any brand loyalty to their alma maters. I didn’t even know where my mother had gone, now that I was thinking about it.I told myself that there was plenty of time to apply. It was only November. The much more immediate issue was what Angela had left me with. I hadn’t noticed Edythe looking at me in any type of way Angela was describing. In class, all I got were exasperated eyerolls and thinly veiled insults. I desperately wanted to see more of her. But I couldn’t be selfish; I definitely wasn’t more important than making sure the reservation was safe. Biology would have to do for now.I kept my promise to Charlie and returned home before dark. He appeared an hour after me.“I made dinner,” I told him, pointing to the plate of salmon in the microwave. He warmed it up and asked me what I was working on. I turned my laptop so he could see.“Angela said she’s already been applying to colleges.”Charlie’s eyes widened. “Already? Is it that time?”I shrugged. “Guess so.”He ran his hands over his face. “Aw, jeez, Bells. It must’ve slipped my mind with all the – no, you know what? There’s no excuse. I even heard one of the deputies talking about helping his son apply.”“It’s not your fault,” I assured him. “I just thought I’d mention it. I don’t know what the good schools are here in Washington.”There was a beat of silence. Charlie stared at me. “You want to stay here for college?”“I mean, I’ll have to hear out mom’s case, but yeah. I’d miss you. And Jacob, and Angela, and… and Alice.”He smiled, and I was horrified to see tears shining in his eyes. Horrified, and a little bit choked up, too.“I’m glad you’ve been making friends.” He cleared his throat. “And I promise, Bella, I’ll make more time. As soon as we find this bear, maybe I can take some time off – ““Dad.” I looked away. “Really. Don’t worry about that. I’m happy.”He reached out and took my hand, squeezing once, seeming to not be able to say any more.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Bella
At this point, I didn’t even hope that the light in my bedroom window was from the sun. Forks had a special way of reflecting gray skies off of snow for an even less cheery effect than rain.It was miserably cold. I went outside to start the car and let the heat run, like I did every morning. I was shivering violently. And someone had rolled my car window down.Errant snowflakes had drifted into the frozen cab. I started the car as I cranked the window lever, but the window stayed where it was. Somewhere inside, metal ground against metal and my stomach plummeted. Of all the things I had expected to go wrong with Thing, windows were at the bottom of the list. It was also, in the moment, the worst possible defect. Or at least the most annoying. The engine had started fine, there was nothing wrong with the tires. I could still get to school, but I would freeze to death.Charlie was at work. He probably wouldn’t mind coming home to look at it, but that would end with me getting dropped off in the cruiser. And I was already running late. By the time I reversed out of the driveway, snow shooting in through the gap and onto my face, I was ready to burst into frustrated tears. I tried the crank again, to no avail. I even stopped at the shoulder and tried pushing the glass up with my hands, but my skin slid uselessly over the ice. Maybe Jacob could look at it. After school. Such a long time away.Defeated, I pulled back onto the road. Snow was settled on the ground, but the roads were relatively clear. I shrunk down in a feeble attempt to avoid the blast of air coming through my window. I hadn’t thought to wear gloves. My hands were stinging and numb long before I pulled into a parking spot, so instead of enjoying my breakfast alone in the warmth, I shoved the sandwich-bagged pop tarts into my backpack and ran inside, texting Jacob as I went.He sent me an excited yes before I was out of my first hour, which was the fastest he had responded to a text in a week. I pondered ways to repay him as I walked to the next building, stopping when I saw that the snow had started up again. Dark clouds. And the temperature was dropping. Just great.I fretted all the way through lunch, listening to Alice and Jessica talk about some prom dress designer. I think Alice even offered to make Jessica’s dress for her. I ignored her pointed looks in my direction. There was no way I was going to prom.I only looked over at Edythe’s table once, to find her smiling and laughing at something. Emmett caught me staring and winked. I smiled back weakly, looking through the windows at the falling snow. Leather seats. I had leather seats.“You know,” Edythe said to me as soon as she sat down in Bio. “You could have just called one of us.”I blinked. So she was in a talkative mood today. It was always a crapshoot; sometimes she barely spoke a word to me, other days she was full of pithy remarks and smirking. But her hair was down, and as usual it took me a second to hear the words. Looking at her so close always did something to my brain.“Called you?”“Is Alice a liar, or did you drive to school with a broken window this morning?”I blinked again, horrified. “She saw that?”Edythe nodded gravely. “You’re a masochist.”“I didn’t think to call her,” I admitted. “I didn’t know she was good with cars.”“She’s not, so I’ll just fix it.”“You know cars?”She nodded with a little hum of affirmation, opening her book. I wanted to say yes, if only because the offer itself made my heart skip a beat. But it was too late.“Don’t worry about it,” I finally relucted. She looked up.“I’m perfectly capable of – ““I’m sure you are,” I cut in. “But Jacob’s gonna fix it for me, so…”Something changed. Her face froze in a pleasant expression, yet she was very obviously upset. About something.“What?” I asked. “He made the car.”Edythe’s voice was strained. “So I should just let you drive home in the cold?”“You need to be on patrol after school,” I reminded her, trying to make her understand. I leaned in out of habit, forgetting she would be able to hear anyway. “I don’t want to distract you. Or anyone.”“Fine,” she said, irritated. Still smiling. “I’ll leave it.”She was starting to irritate me, so I kept my mouth shut.“Do you want me to check your homework?” She asked a moment later, tone slightly more pleasant. I handed over my folder with a sigh.At the bell, she left without walking me to the gym. It confused me. Was she mad? And what, exactly, did she have to be mad about?Frustrated with her and dreading the drive home, I stumbled across the lot after a grueling hour of volleyball to inspect the damage. I pulled my car door open, not realizing what had happened until I was looking at a dry, snowless cab. My window was up.I rolled the crank down experimentally, and then back up, a slow smile spreading across my face. I looked around, but there was no silver Volvo to be seen. How could she have done it so fast?There was a folded sheet of paper on the dash. I sat and opened it, recognizing the neat script immediately.
I said I wouldn’t. You can thank Rosalie.
Signed E. And below that, a phone number. I slid down in my seat, pulling the collar of my sweater up over my mouth so no one would see me grinning like an idiot in my car. The pen had made deep indentations in the paper. I ran my fingers over them carefully, smile fading as I realized I’d have to explain this to Jacob.Oh. Oh!That’s why she had been so weird about it. This was a spite thing.I put the number in my phone anyway, with no small amount of triumph. Alice texted me a second later.
Make sure you change the oil before Christmas, too.
Stop watching me, I answered, tossing my phone and pulling out when there was an opening. Jacob was still expecting me, and I wanted to see him anyway, so I turned towards town to pick up some coffees to soften the blow.The snow had stopped again by the time I got to the reservation. Jacob had sent me directions to a new house – Emily’s, he called it, though I knew Emily was Sam’s wife. It was a cute house, just across the street from the ocean, yellow and Sierra red. He bounded out to meet me before I’d even parked. His lack of a shirt offended me.“Smells like bloodsucker in here,” he said, yanking the door open and leaning in. “Which window is it?”“Yeah, about that.”“What?”“It’s fixed already.”His eyebrows drew together, and I hastened to hand him his latte. He took it from me suspiciously. “Did you go to a mechanic?”“Of course not.”His eyes bugged. “Charlie did it? He barely knows how to change a tire!”“How’s Emily?” I tried to slide out of the car, but he wouldn’t budge, eyes narrowing. “Am I meeting her tonight?”“Who fixed the window, Bella?”I shrunk beneath his glower. “Um, Edythe... And Rosalie, I think.”He breathed out, jaw twitching. It was the angriest I’d ever seen anyone look with a coffee cup in their hand. “I thought I was your mechanic.”I felt guilty for a moment, until something in his expression clicked for me. I couldn’t help it – I started laughing.“Oh my God – you’re jealous!”“That’s ridiculous,” he said, moving when I pushed at his chest. I grabbed my backpack and my own coffee, slamming the car door shut. “Jealous of you and - ?”“Not jealous of me,” I slapped my hand to the door. “Jealous of the car.”At his answering pout, I knew I was right. “You can’t stand that they touched it, can you?”He sniffed. “Maybe if they didn’t leave their stench behind... Just let me look at it next time.”“Aye, aye, captain.” I started toward the house. He stopped me with an arm around my waist, turning me the opposite direction. “Ow!” I said, though it was more jarring than painful.“Let’s go to the garage. I’m in the mood to fix something.”“Okay,” I fumbled for my car keys.He pulled me along down the gravel road. “Let’s walk. It’s nice out.”“Maybe for you.” His arm over my shoulder was burning hot.“It’s not too far,” he reasoned. “We’ll go through backyards.”I glanced wistfully back at Thing. “I think we should save trespassing for the summer.”Jacob glanced down at me. “I don’t want Billy to know we’re back there.”“Why not?”“He’d try to talk to me.”I looked at the set of his jaw, the tightness of his shoulders. Jacob rolled his eyes at my calculating expression. “Stop trying to figure it out. You’ll never guess.”“Tell me, then.” I put my arm around his middle so I wouldn’t trip as we moved from the gravel to the mud, crossing diagonally across the yard of a small brown house.After a long moment of quiet, he started talking. And talking. And talking. Until I’d nearly forgotten completely about the miserable weather. I stopped in the doorway of the garage, gaping up at him.“Embry is your brother?”“Get inside,” he hissed, looking at the house. I let him usher me onto the tile. “I said it’s possible.”I shook my head, unable to close my mouth. “So he doesn’t know who his dad is? And just because he’s a wolf it has to be one of your dads? Are you sure?”“Pretty damn.”“And you have the same birthmark?”Jake grunted. “Hard to miss, we’re seeing each other naked a lot these days.”“Does he know?”“No,” he said, steering me toward the armchair. “What would I even say?”The chair squeaked as I got comfortable. I really didn’t know what advice I could give. Renée had told me when it happened, Jacob’s mom and the crash. I was sad at the time, remembering the kind woman who had given us popsicles and made us picnic baskets. It had been hard on Jacob and Billy, I was sure, in ways I would never understand. If Jacob was right about this, right about Billy being unfaithful to his mother seventeen years ago, I couldn’t imagine the toll it would take on their relationship.“Does anyone know?”He cleared his throat, putting a wrench to the motorcycle engine. “Paul.”I held a hand over the space heater. “You guys talked? That’s good.”He didn’t answer, leaving me to my own assumptions. I didn’t guess it went well.“How is Quil adjusting to everything?”He exhaled a laugh. “Great. I think he’s just glad to finally know what the hell is going on.”I tilted my head against the seat, looking up at the dusty rafters. “Me too.”“Anyway. What’s going on with you? Your life and stuff.”I sighed. “College applications.”“What? Really?”“Yeah. Insane that I have to worry about that, on top of everything.”The idle mechanical noises stopped. “Guess you’ll go back to Arizona, huh?”I shrugged. “Mom’s in Florida now.”“That’s far.”“Yeah. It is.” I didn’t want to think about just how far. “But… it would be really nice going to Seattle with Angela. And Tacoma was beautiful.”“That’s still far,” Jake snapped. I looked at him. His arms had begun to shake. Without warning, he sprang to his feet and flung the wrench in his hand. It hit the wall with a nice loud bang that reverberated through the entire garage.“Jesus!”“Tacoma is three hours away!” He cried, turning to face me. “Seattle’s four!”“So what?!”“I’ll never get to see you!”“Jake,” I said in warning.He took an unsteady step away from me, knees wobbling, waving one hand in the air in meek apology. “Sorry. Sorry. I don’t know where that came from. Fuck.”“What’s wrong?”He laughed. “What’s wrong? C’mon.”I sat up straight while he composed himself. He hid his face for a moment, then turned to me almost sheepishly.“I was excited when you moved here,” he said. “And…we got along. Whatever. But then shit hit the fan, and now I’m permanently on the clock and everyone’s lives are at stake. My whole…goddamn life is slipping away.He kicked half-heartedly at his toolbox.“I’m not going anywhere for a while, okay?” I said. I hated seeing him like this. He looked young, and tired. “And this…it’s temporary.”“Temporary?”“You’ll get the bad guys,” I said, smiling. “Then it’ll be over.”“Yeah, no,” Jake said. “No. It won’t be.”His tone was even more hopeless now, soured. “We’re all going to be council members, when we’re old enough," he said. "Guaranteed employment.”I was speechless. For some reason, this had not occurred to me. “Forever?” I asked, my voice a hollow echo.“Yup.” He glanced at me and smirked. “Okay – not forever. I’m not a bloodsucker.”“What do you mean? You’ll – you’ll get old?”“Eventually.”“Don’t fuck with me.”“It’s up for debate,” he said. “I mean, look at me. At all of us. I changed. I – got older, physically older.”I remembered his sudden change – the muscles, the jaw, the look in his eyes. Had he aged?“The legends aren’t really specific,” he went on. “No one was writing down dates, or anything, but Billy says Ephraim lived to be a hundred and fifty.”Jacob would live another hundred years – longer. And Quil, and Embry, and Paul…Edythe, too. And where did that leave me?“You look how I feel,” Jake murmured, turning his attention back to the engine. “But I’m fine, really. Sorry I took that out on you.”There was no way he was fine. “If that’s true, then your life isn’t slipping away. It’s barely started.”“Yeah, yeah,” he said. “Very optimistic, Bella.”I watched him, and when he turned the conversation to something stupid about Quil and a gluten allergy, I allowed him to. Even if my mind was stuck on the living forever club I was evidently doomed to be excluded from.“Hungry?” He asked after a while, an instant response to my stomach just barely growling. “Me, too. Let’s head.”I stood with a suppressed sigh. This was the reason I had all but stopped eating lunch at school – knowing Edythe had super hearing made me extremely reluctant to digest food next to her. Now I just crammed white bread sandwiches into my mouth on the way home.“Back to Emily’s?”“Yep.” He pulled open the door, exposing a night snowier and darker than we had left it. I was breaking my promise to Charlie, but not really. The reservation was the safest place to be at the present, and he told me he wouldn’t be home until late.Jake laughed at me. “Alright, I’ll show you mercy. Get on my back.”“Sorry?”“Trust me,” he said. I backed away from him, or started to, but Jacob grabbed my arm and twisted himself in front of me, crouching and dragging me onto his back whether I liked it or not. I yelled and grabbed as he straightened up and the floor dropped way far down.“No!” I screamed as he hoisted me up. We burst laughing out into the cold, him trying to hold me in place while shutting the door behind us. His shoulders were unbelievably hard, and the muscle that shifted beneath them made my head spin. He was very big, so when he took off running, I couldn’t even comprehend the speed. Even holding me, Jake ran like my weight wasn’t there at all. The snowfall blurred into a galaxy at warp speed. I stopped my laughing and squirming and clutched Jacob with all of my strength, a gasp hanging in my throat, each step jarring my teeth together.In less than five minutes, we came to a halt in the light of Emily’s porch.“Release me,” I begged. Jake did, dropping me to my feet and giving me two seconds to catch my breath.“Ready to meet the cult?” He asked, winking.“Absolutely.”__________________________________ “Any updates?” I asked the next day in Biology. Edythe and I were half-heartedly completing an antibiotics lab.“Not yet,” she responded, dropping something into a test tube. “I promise we are trying.”“I know that. I didn’t mean…” I shook my head. “I know that.”“How was your night? Window stay up?”My night had been spent staring at her phone number. “Yeah,” I said. “You really didn’t need to do that, though.”She smiled blandly. “I know.”“Jake has proclaimed himself my mechanic. Just, moving forward.”“I didn’t realize. Won’t happen again.”I leaned in, chin on palm. “I’m sure he’ll appreciate that.”“If you ever did need help,” she said, “with anything, and Mr. Black wasn’t available, then…” She glanced over, eyes sparkling. “I would love to rub it in his face.”I snorted. “Don’t give in to the hate just because he does. He would like you if he knew you.”“No.”“We should all hang out sometime! Like, after.”“After,” she said, frowning at the test tubes and making notes on our worksheet. “That might be asking too much of poor Jacob Black.”“But not of you?”“Of course not.”I narrowed my eyes at her. “Okay, fine, he doesn’t have to come.”Edythe’s mouth twitched. She looked straight ahead. “Then it would just be us?”I cleared my throat. “That too much? I promise not to throw up.”It looked like she was going to respond. She glanced at me, then away, then she raised her hand. “Mrs. Banner. Our stain has developed.”“Oh! First ones,” our teacher said, bustling over. “Let me see, girls.”I let Edythe take the glory. She feigned bashfulness when Banner praised her, eyes flashing at me behind her back. I clapped along with the rest of the class.___________________________ I was very surprised to find Alice waiting by my truck after gym. “What’s going on?” I asked immediately.She shrugged. “I could use a break from Edythe today. Thought you might want some company on your ride home?”“Sure,” I said. I noticed Ben Cheney and one of his cousins watching us curiously. Ben waved and I smiled at him, pulling open my door and climbing up. “You’re not patrolling tonight?”“It’s beginning to feel like a massive waste of time,” she said, “So, no.”“Because you still can’t see?” I looked for Edythe’s car, but they had already left.Alice made a sound, gazing out the window as I pulled through school traffic. “Why did you need a break from Edythe?”“I’m trying to form a plan, and I don’t need her input just yet.” She turned to me. “Do you have a conditioning routine?”“W-what?”“I feel like you’re brushing your hair with a brush. When it’s wet. You should be combing it.”“How could you possibly know that?”“Your hair’s frizzy on the top. May I?” She wiggled her fingers.“Um, sure. Why do you care about my hair routine?”She reached out, touching the hair over my right shoulder. She brushed her fingers lightly through it, then tossed it back. “It’s fun. I’ve never had a human friend before. At least your hair can adapt. We’re stuck with what we’ve got, and Edythe and Rosalie don’t let me experiment with theirs. Jasper has these beautiful curls, but he won’t let me do anything with them. I can’t straighten it, slick it back...the nineties were a nightmare.”I had learned Alice had a reason for everything. I still wasn’t sure where this was headed.“How old is Jasper?”“Nineteen,” Alice said. Then, “He was born in 1844.”I nodded like that wasn’t the most incredible thing ever. He was even older than Edythe.Alice was quiet for a few minutes. “There’s only so much I can do, you know?” She said. I knew right away this was what she had been working up to. “All the nomads have to do is realize we aren’t patrolling during the day. Edythe knows the wolves are still patrolling at night, around the town.”She cut me a look, and I said nothing.“They’re undermining us. So I see nothing. And what I can see is just...fractals. None of it means anything because I only have one piece. We’re going to have to...think outside the box.”“How so?”“We need to shut them out. Just long enough for me to see. I’ll have to get you some product for these ends – when’s your birthday?”“September,” I said dryly. “You can’t shut the wolves out. What does that even mean?”“I haven’t decided yet.”“You can’t break the treaty.”“I’m not going to. And it’s for their own good. If it works, they’ll thank me.”“It really sounds like you’re planning on breaking the treaty.”“Yeah,” Alice mused. “Maybe.”“Please be careful,” I said, knowing I couldn’t dissuade her. “I know Charlie – ““Rosalie’s with him. She complained enough about patrol I think she’ll be shadowing him from now on.”“Oh. Okay.”Alice watched me in silence. “Do you even have a night moisturizer?”________________________________ 
Edythe
“We’ll have to lie to the pack,” Alice said, leaning up toward the front seats of my car. Beside me, Jasper turned to face her. We had been riding home in silence for the past several days, each of us gnawing on the problem in their own way. I had asked Alice several times what she was hiding from me, but she’d insisted she wasn’t ready. Maybe she finally was.“Explain,” Jasper said.“Sam told us they always come from the north. We need to go higher, intercept them.”“Canada?” I asked.“Canada, Alaska. Far enough away I can untangle myself.”“The wolves will be really, really pissed if they aren’t involved in the kill,” Emmett cut in from behind Jasper.“We won’t kill them,” Alice said. “Duh.”“They already think we’ll side with the nomads,” Rosalie reminded her. “And we swore we wouldn’t.”“It’s just reconnaissance,” Alice said. “All we need is to get close enough for Edythe to read them. They don’t even need to know we’re there.”“They’ll be waiting for something like that,” Jasper said. My thoughts aligned with his – we had found no trails, but that didn’t mean the nomads hadn’t been close.“Doesn’t matter.” Alice looked at me. “We take a week off school. Mono. Scour the upper peninsula. Get the Denalis in on it.”“No,” I said quickly. No Denalis this time. “To the latter. Yes to the former.” My heart sank at the thought of not seeing Bella for that long, but this plan had a very high chance of working.“Fine,” Alice said. As I decided, she saw. Her vision of our upcoming trip was hazy, indistinct. She knew me, and she knew herself, but the other vampires were completely unknown. She wouldn’t see anything until our paths directly intersected.“I’m coming,” Jasper said.“Jazz, it’s a stealth mish. No need. Plus, there’s only two of them.”He shook his head, jaw tight. “That we know of.”Alice huffed. “Fine. That leaves Emmett and Esme for patrol on the border.”“Joy,” Rose said. Now she would have to be alone while she followed a group of policemen through the woods. “Are you going to tell Carlisle about this?”I shook my head. “He’s working.”“Hm,” she said. That’s convenient.Alice, Jasper and I took off without going inside the house. I shucked my jacket and shoes and Alice did the same. It was going to be a long night, and I liked my winter boots too much to wear them out all at once.__________________________After six hours, we had seen or were going to see all of the Washington Peninsula. Alice predicted no encounters, so we continued north of the contiguous United States. The ocean was dark and turbulent, and swimming was slower than running, but Alice thought the thickly forested Vancouver Island was our best bet. She had seen something, nearly. A glimpse of a glimpse. We were lucky to get that much, considering the general lack of information the pack had to give. We knew the trails always came from the North, and always ended in the water. They had to come up somewhere, and I doubted it was Hawaii.My arms tore through the water, carrying me beneath a large wave. Ice formed in my hair. Alice’s mind lit up above me, where she windmilled herself across the surface. A ranger cabin, with a sign that read Port Renfrew. Very close. I followed her guidance, scarcely breaking stride as we reached the shore and ran into the snow-covered tree line.It’s disappearing, she thought, somewhere just behind me in the darkness. They must be undecided.“Follow the plan,” I yelled over. If we stuck to it, there were no risks.Just as I spoke, the vision hit her. She came to a halt, skidding in the snow. Four miles north. It’s the cabin again, she thought with relief. Be careful.She and Jasper turned back to the beach while I shot north alone. When the faint buzz of electricity from the cabin and the heartbeat within were clearly audible, I stopped and vaulted to the topmost branch of a pine. The smell of the tree was almost overpowering, but I wouldn’t need to breathe, or move at all. I wouldn’t even blink. Unless the nomads were gifted, and gifts like mine were vanishingly rare, they would have no idea I was there. I made myself still and snow collected on my skin.They might not have been the nomads we were looking for. All Alice knew was that we would encounter someone at this point. Could be completely random, but I didn’t think so. Either way, I could only observe. I was here to get in their heads, see what they wanted, and let them go. Purely reconnaissance.While I waited, wind wailing through the treetops, I thought about Bella. She was with the wolves, tonight. She said she had been invited for dinner. Again. Not safe at home. Jacob made her happy, and I didn’t doubt his intent to keep her safe, but there was no ignoring what had already happened to one of their own.I knew Bella was worried about him. Angela had been thinking about it at lunch. I wondered if Bella knew how Jacob felt about Paul – perhaps that didn’t matter. Maybe he had feelings for both of them and didn’t realize it. Maybe he did. I was certainly no judge of attraction and its changeability.The light of the cabin was faint, maybe half a mile away, nestled in the trees out of view save one corner of log-stacked roof. The ranger inside drank something and rustled paper. He would see his daughter this weekend. Her name was Annie. I didn’t want to hear him die.A wind swooped in from the West, bringing with it the far-off sound of footfalls lighter than deer and three times as fast. Just after the sound of their feet, when I focused hard, was the sound of their minds, two flickering candles in the darkness, alive with thought and feeling.First, there was an odd doubling effect. The direction of my thoughts these days so often mirrored Alice’s that I was sure it was her mind I was hearing, attuned as it was to a particular face and scent. But it was not Alice.A male and a female. They closed in on the cabin, hunting, so their thoughts were tighter than they otherwise would have been, sharp with hunger. The male stopped short, letting the woman run ahead. This kill was for her. Her name was Victoria.They were mated, but the male’s mind was completely disinterested in her. It was focused with razor-sharp precision on something else entirely. The warm-blooded human sitting less than fifty feet from him held no appeal to his ravenous hunger, to his exceptional thirst. I burned sympathetically at the pain he was experiencing – he was starved beyond anything I had ever inflicted upon myself.He was thinking, intently, of Bella Swan.On the outside, I was a statue. Even as every part of me burned with an emotion I had no name for. Fear, rage, despair, madness, and hate – too much of each for what my physical form should be able to hold. Deep down inside of me, something gave. I heard the faint boom of it, felt the ravaged pieces of resistance scattering the wide expanse of my mind like arterial blood on a white wall.I didn’t allow myself one inch of movement. If I so much as lifted a finger, it would be a fight. And I didn’t know if I would win. Follow the plan, I repeated, on an endless loop. Alice had surely gone blind again, now that I planned to go straight back and tell the wolves everything. She wouldn’t know to come find me. If I was killed, no one would know what I had learned.Using every vestigial scrap of self-control to do the impossible, I stayed still and listened to the monster below. I wanted – needed – to know how this had happened.Second by agonizing second, I picked up the idiosyncrasies of his mind, piecing it all together with mounting horror. He was a tracker. A new facet of the Quileute legend made sense to me now. They called him the dark-eyed man. Only feeding on what he hunted, only hunting what stood out to him. Strong enough to essentially starve himself between victims. He kept coming, coming for Ephraim Black’s people. Even though he knew the risks – had lost a friend.But that was wrong, too. My theory twisted as I listened to how he thought. The risk was the best part. And all of us, working together, was the biggest risk he had ever faced. Something in his gift, this particular skill for finding quarry, had zeroed him in on the one weak link between us and the wolves.In less than two minutes, my entire perspective had changed. As absolute as the turning of the Earth. And Bella was all the way in Forks.The woman completed her circle around the cabin, glancing at her partner. I caught that he was James. Victoria and James. She was going to kick over a tree to get the ranger outside, away from cameras. I waited for the impact and the pine’s massive crack, using it to cover the sound of my jump. The act of movement ever so slightly cleared my head, and as the ranger’s thoughts flashed in alarm, I made the decision to kick, hard, at the trunk of a tree as I fell. The resulting crash echoed through the forest.I was out of range before I could hear their reactions, but I wasn’t worried about them finding my trail. From what I had heard, things were far past that. Alice and Jasper waited for me on the frozen beach. Jasper gave an outward cry of alarm as my emotional unrest smacked him in the face. Alice looked panicked.“Everything’s gone,” she said. What happened?My reflection in her eyes startled me. Whose face was that?“Edythe!” She cried when I didn’t answer. “What’s wrong?!”I was scaring her. I needed to say something. The sand under our feet crackled and popped as the tide washed out from under us. Bella was two hundred miles away.“He’s a tracker,” I spat. Jasper drew closer, eyes widening. “And he wants Bella.”

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Bella
I woke suddenly from deep sleep, at first unsure what was happening. My room was dark and it didn’t feel like pre-dawn. Something moved and I flinched.“It’s me,” a low voice clipped. I pushed myself up and back against my headboard, heart pounding and stomach churning.“E-Edythe?”Something landed on my feet. A shape moved around my closet. “Get up,” she said stiffly. “We have to go.”I sat up straighter at the urgency in her voice, still disoriented. The more I woke up, the more this all seemed like a dream. But it was a lot different than my other Edythe dreams. For one, the room was freezing when I pushed my blankets aside. It was usually the nightmares that were cold.“What are you doing?”“We have to go,” she repeated no less urgently. She was tossing things at my feet. I reached out and felt my big duffel, several items of clothing laying on top.“…Packing?”Her voice was a hushed drone. “I need to get you on a plane.”“A plane?”“Do you have a passport? Doesn’t matter. I’ll get you one in Seattle.”“Passport,” I echoed, consternated. I tried to catch her hand as she chucked more hangers at me. She was too fast. Disgruntled, I scooted to my feet and forced myself between her and the closet.“Edythe, what –?”Very quickly, and with no regard for my sanity, she put a hand on my hip and jerked me close with it. Her other hand appeared on my cheek, ridiculously cold. My heart raced and my blood did it’s best to burst through my cheeks. Not a dream, then. My dreams never did her scent justice.“Bella.” Her breath was icy, too. A cold front against my warm. “I’m going to ask that you trust me. You said before that you did.”“Yes." I wanted to see the intensity I could hear in her voice, but it was too dark. “I trust you.”Too late, I understood what she was really asking. Something about a plane. “Did something happen?”“No.” A hand pushed my hair back gently. I almost lost myself in the sensation of it. She’d never touched me like this, and the most cynical part of my brain cut in – she must have a motive. I swam through the fog of pleasure, again, to voice my concern.“Why are you getting on a plane?”She pulled her hand away from my face. My skin was burning from how cold it was. “Rosalie will get us the tickets.”I clung on as she tried to push me away, grabbing at the fabric of her shirt. “Edythe, what happened? Why are you…all wet?”Her hand stopped mine from touching more of her. Was it water? Blood? “I can’t,” she whispered, in a new tone. “I can’t say it.”The shift from aroused to terrified was hard and fast. “Who?” I asked, breathless with fear. “Who’s hurt? Jacob? Alice?”“They’re fine. Please don’t freak out,” she pleaded. “Just help me pack – “She fell abruptly silent. My breath caught as she touched me – a very cold finger against the juncture of my shoulder and chest.“Who did this to you?”It was hard to catch up to her line of thought. “Did what?”Somewhat roughly, she jerked me toward the bed. My lamp snapped on and the light made everything much worse. Edythe looked completely feral. Not bad, exactly, because Edythe could never look bad, but scary. Her hair fell damp and tangled, plastered to her shoulders. The golden color I’d come to expect in her eyes wasn’t there. Instead they were a dull brown and framed with dark circles. When she spoke, her voice shook with anger, nostrils flared. “Who did it?”I followed her gaze. Under the strap of my tank top, there was a bruise. Just barely darker than my skin. Jacob, horsing around and yanking me onto his back the other night. I hadn’t really felt any pain, but it made sense – he was strong.I said none of this to Edythe. “What happened tonight?”Her face twitched horribly. She shut her eyes, jaw taut.“Let go of me,” I said, trying to pull away uselessly. Her grip was stronger than steel. She turned her head toward the window and mumbled something I didn’t catch.“What?”“Jacob,” she said darkly.“Jacob’s here?” I glanced at the window, terrified and relieved. Jacob was here, he was okay.“Outside, pacing. He’s too furious with me to phase back.”“Furious with you? What for?” I pulled at the grip around my arm. “Was it one of the pack? Are they hurt?”Edythe gave no indication she heard me, still turned and listening. So perfect and still she could have been a stature in a graveyard. A harbinger of grief. “No. I haven’t,” she said.“What’s he saying? Can he hear you?”She murmured something else so quiet and quick I only barely heard. "Tell her yourself.”“Tell. Me. What?” I hissed, leaning up. Edythe’s eyes opened in surprise, then in pain, like I was hurting her. I jerked my arm harder, and she finally let go. I would bruise there, too.She said my name as I rushed out of the room and down the steps as quietly as possible. Charlie was asleep. Of course she beat me to the back door.“Move, Edythe.”“This isn’t smart. He's very upset.”My hands fisted themselves. “He would never hurt me. Ever.”“He already did,” she snapped, grabbing my shoulder. Already feeling guilty about it, I faked a wince. It worked – the anger melted from her face and she let go. Well, that was something. There was a second of quiet, where I wasn’t sure she would let me leave. Would I have to scream? Wake Charlie up?She flashed away, appearing again before I had time to take a breath. “At lease put these on,” she said, holding out a coat and a pair of my tennis shoes. I shrugged the coat on while she watched, feeling like a child. When my feet were shoved haphazardly into the shoes, she stepped silently out of my way.The coat didn’t do much; wind ripped at my bare legs, taking with it the last of the warmth that Edythe’s skin hadn’t already leached away. When I didn’t see Jacob immediately, I stalked toward the tree line.“Jake?”The darkness took on the shape of a wolf, tossing and turning its head. I froze, steeling myself. I hadn’t seen one of them like this since Paul had freaked out on me. Jake was...even more massive, the color of fall leaves with large, thudding paws. His eyes were huge and dark, and I couldn’t see his teeth, thankfully. I took a step forward.Edythe moved in front of me, one hand closing around my bicep. Jacob’s lips did pull back, then, around a snarl loud enough to make me jump.“Jake,” I urged. “Just phase back. Just – calm down.”I needed him to talk to me, to tell me the truth that Edythe wouldn’t. A high-pitched whimper broke through the rolling growls.“Just calm down,” I whispered. “It’s gonna be okay!”He snorted, the first sign of amusement. I took it as a good thing when he backed away into the trees. “Let go,” I said.Edythe did not let me go. I strained around her back, gazing into the trees.“You’re not helping,” she said, just as Jacob stomped back into view. He shook all over. “Don’t do it.”“She deserves to know,” Jake said murderously, coming toward us one shaky step at a time. Edythe moved me backward with inexorable force. “This is your fault.”“Stop!” I pulled again at my arm. “Don’t – fight – ““You should have killed him,” Jacob said.I stopped fighting, confused. What Jacob said didn’t line up quite right. “Killed who?”His body rocked violently. Edythe leaned forward on the balls of her feet, edging me backward. She was scared he would hurt me like Quil had hurt Paul. I didn’t have that fear. I was angry.“Jake,” I said. He looked at me for the first time, face falling into a sad sort of resignation. I inhaled sharply. Both sides, then. At least two people were hurt if they were both acting like this.“They found them, Bells,” he told me. “The strays.”“And?” I demanded. He took a deep breath.“They let them go.”Edythe made a strangled sound.“And we know what they want,” Jake said. He looked at Edythe again. “You.”My hand fisted over my heart. “They want Edythe?”His eyebrows quirked. “No, dummy. You.”It was so far out of left field I almost laughed. They were mad at each other for no reason, because clearly this was wrong. Someone had misunderstood. Jacob frowned when I shook my head, like he hadn’t expected me to question this. “C’mon,” I said, swallowing. “You're joking, right?”He didn’t laugh. He looked upset. Nonplussed, I turned to Edythe, the angle of my restraint making it awkward. “What’s he talking about?”She was locked in a paralytic stillness, opposite from Jacob’s shivering but obviously just as stressed. Her eyes didn’t waver from him. “It’s true. I heard it.”I was dumbstruck.“They want to kill you,” Jacob clarified, watching me. For a reaction, maybe. I blinked at him, trying to speak and finding my throat closed up.“That’s not what Alice meant,” Edythe said, in answer to something else. “She was trying to say – ““Get out of my head!”“You’re loud!”“Why me?” I asked. Not to anyone in particular, just so that someone might hear it and realize how ridiculous it sounded.Jacob crossed his arms and gave Edythe a defiant look. “It’s so fucking sick.”I was stuck somewhere between denial and bargaining. What they were telling me categorically could not be true. Surely one of them would have owned up to the joke by now.“Bella…” Edythe said. I looked over at the sound of her voice. The smallest bit of emotion clouded her eyes, going dark as Jake moved toward us. This time when she moved backwards my feet dug into the mud.“Edythe, let me go!”“No,” she ground out stubbornly.“I heard what she was saying to you in there,” Jacob said desperately. “You’re not leaving, right? Tell her you won’t leave.”No one was hurt, I was still realizing. Nothing had actually changed. We just knew what they wanted - me.Just me.“Bella,” he begged.“No,” I said belatedly. “I’m not leaving.”His face cleared a little, but Edythe shook her head. “You’d rather she stay and be used as bait.”“That’s not what I said, bloodsucker!” Jacob snapped. Edythe took another large step back with me in tow. “She’s the safest human in the whole goddamn world with all of us protecting her!”“You don't know what we’re dealing with.” Her voice chilled me, cold and hard and flat. Jacob shook harder. “He knows our weaknesses. He knows how to stay in Alice’s blind spot without ever having met her. He has had plenty of time to get to Bella. He’s been here. He has her scent.”Jacob set his jaw.“He’d rather we find out like this," she continued slowly. "When he’d already had the chance. This is a game to him, alright? A game of rising stakes that he’s never lost. He is one hundred percent committed. He’ll gladly die trying to –” She stopped herself. “Is it a risk you’re willing to take?”I gazed sightlessly at the ground. What they were saying to each other tried to connect, to form a realization I didn’t want to have. I wished they hadn’t told me at all.“Stay back,” Edythe spat. Jacob stopped his approach, eyes on me. “You know you can’t control it.”Jake winced.“I don’t know, it might,” Edythe said after a pause. Jake looked at her, eyebrows contracting. “But we’re watching him. We have been all week.”Jake shook his head in annoyance. “Maybe Billy can get him out to the reservation. It’s safer there.”“Are you talking about Charlie?” I asked, and then went cold all over with a different realization.“He’s gonna be fine,” Jake said. “Bells, why don’t you skip school and hang with Emily tomorrow?”Edythe made a tense sound. “I don’t think – ““I wasn’t asking you,” he snarled.“Don’t fight,” I managed.“Bella, please – ” Edythe sounded worse now.“It’s her decision. Not yours.”“We need to take this very seriously.”“Fuck you.”Edythe went stiff. I gripped her arm tight. Everything had taken on a dreamy, unreal feeling, but I still didn’t like them yelling at each other like this. Edythe whispered something and Jake sucked in a breath like he was going to start screaming.“But I never even met this person!” I blurted, my tone taking on a hysterical edge. “This doesn’t make any sense!”Edythe drew a breath. “It’s too cold, Jacob. Look at her.”Jake looked at me and nodded reluctantly. “Yeah. I’ll stay with her.”“I will,” Edythe said forcefully. “You were ordered to return.”A shudder passed through Jake that seemed to blur his edges. Edythe pulled my arm, drawing me further behind her body. “I don’t have to obey orders. Bella, t-tell her– tell her– ”“Jake,” I said, trying to soothe him. “It’s okay. Edythe can stay.”“Of course.” He rolled his eyes and took a step back from us, taking deep, heaving breaths. “Whatever. Just – don’t let her make you do anything you don’t want to do.”I nodded. “I’ll see you tomorrow. After school, okay?”Jake shrugged. “If you’re allowed.”With one last glare at Edythe, he turned. I watched him disappear into the shadows.Edythe released me. My arm throbbed dully where I had been pulling against her grip. “Inside,” she said. The faint light threw her cheekbone into sharp relief, making her seem gaunt and sad.I didn’t move. “Is it true? It’s me?”She shook her head, momentarily mute. Then she nodded. I thought I might have laughed, or groaned.“Of course it’s your choice," Edythe said brokenly. “But you should consider leaving.”I shook my head, some sense coming back. That wasn’t a solution at all. “What happens if I do? Running away…it would break Charlie’s heart. And Jacob’s. Not to mention all the other people this – this – ““James,” she supplied, mouth turning around the name.James. It was too normal a name. “He’ll hurt other people.”“I don’t care about other people,” she said.My breath caught. I looked up at her, one hand still curled around her arm, and realized something. Edythe was upset - very upset, to a frightening degree. And that was not because someone in her family had been hurt. It was because there was a chance, however remote, that I might be.Maybe she saw hesitation in my expression. She pressed closer, lowering her voice. “We could go somewhere nice. Warm.”I didn’t know what to say. It was the most tempting offer ever made anywhere on earth, probably. But it wouldn’t be a vacation if I had to hurt someone in the process.I shook my head slowly. Her eyes moved over my face like she was trying to memorize it, and I liked that. “I’ll be out here if you need anything,” she said with an air of resignation. Just like Jacob. “You can go back to bed, you’re safe now.”“You’re going to sit out here in the cold? All night?”“Do I look cold?” She asked, standing there in only a thin shirt and jeans, ice crystals in her hair and on her eyelashes. I was shivering beneath my coat, bare knees knocking together and sockless feet completely frozen numb.“Come inside with me,” I offered.She frowned. “I’m fine out here.”“I don’t want to be alone, Edythe!” I said desperately. I took one of her hands – so cold it hurt to touch – and pulled her toward the house. She followed silently, fingers slack in mine. We returned to my bedroom, where I shut the door and kicked off my shoes and coat, fumbling in the pile on the bed for a thick sweater. I knocked everything else onto the floor.“Do you want to change?” I asked.“No.”“Come on, you’re soaking wet.” She also smelled like salt, like the ocean. “I have dry clothes. Towels. There’s enough room for – for both of us –” It was difficult to talk through my frozen lips. “– in the bed –”“I’m not getting in your bed,” Edythe said scathingly. “I was in the ocean tonight. I’m covered in bacteria. You should wash your skin where I touched you.”I pulled the comforter around myself, sitting obstinately. She stood by my window. “I’m – I’m just saying, you could get comfortable – ““You shouldn’t be asking me to your bed,” Edythe said, in a way that made me blush. “You shouldn’t be inviting me into your house.”“Why not?” I asked in a whisper. Which was it – did she want to run away with me, or away from me? “Why can’t you just sit next to me?”“James didn’t have to meet you to want to kill you, Bella,” Edythe said in a dead, flat voice. “He just had to be downwind of you.”“Edythe…?”“He’s the monster tonight. And you’re afraid, as you should be, but until tonight it was me. You should know that. I was the one who wanted to kill you. On your first day of school, I smelled your blood and I have never wanted to take a life as badly as I did then. I would have gladly killed every witness in the school, in the town, for a single taste. After one hundred years – I almost threw it all away. I had to run to Alaska just to get away from you.”I sat there, shivering like a frightened animal, heart flying in my throat, and said, “You don’t want to kill me.”“The only reason you’re alive right now is because I was too stubborn to let you win. Your mind had blocked me out, I wouldn’t let you take my self-control away from me, too. So I fought, and that fight has been invisible to you and so you’re comfortable. It doesn’t mean I haven’t smelled your blood every day since then and burned for it.”“What makes me so special?” I asked, struggling to keep my voice low, or at least below a scream. “I didn’t ask for that.”“You’re a singer,” Edythe said. I didn’t follow. “Some of you stand out to some of us, without rhyme or reason. I had never before had the misfortune of experiencing it.”I had wondered why Edythe hated me. Now I knew. “I’m so sorry you had to meet me,” I said, eyes stinging. “What is this, then? Are you just trying to – to keep him from winning?”Edythe, a black silhouette against the gray light of my window, stepped closer. “Not just that.” She paused, and I could feel her eyes on me, undeterred by the darkness. “No, don’t cry.”I wiped furiously at my eyes. “You don’t want to kill me. You don’t just want my blood. I’m not going to believe that.” Not after the concert, the hospital benefit, the way she talked to me at school, the way she was here, now, staying with me tonight. The way she looked so scared.“I do not want to kill you,” Edythe agreed, still so far away. “But I will always want your blood. It’s like it was made for me – it makes me feel like, like an animal. If I can even converse with you as a sentient creature it’s because I have fought for the clarity of speech. You saw how badly I failed at that on your first day of school. Please don’t cry,” she said once more. “I’m not telling you this to upset you. I’m telling you the truth, that I have kept from you, in the hopes that you will understand I am not a human. And neither is this hunter.”What did it matter, really, I thought, wiping my eyes. So she wanted my blood. She had tasted human blood before, maybe even killed people at some point. And I wanted to know about that. I did. I just didn’t think it would change anything. I was too far gone.“I trust you,” I whispered. “I think...there are other things you want from me, too.”Edythe didn’t move.“Have I read all of this…wrong?” I asked. “Just tell me.”“Are you even listening? I’m not…good for you.”“It’s a yes or no question. Am I totally wrong?”Another horrible silence. Haltingly, Edythe said, “No. You’re not wrong.”A hot tear splashed down my cheek. I rubbed it away, smiling. That was one thing, this shitshow of a night, that I could hold onto.“We aren’t at the same place,” Edythe said, quieter.“I’m right here,” I argued, even though, as usual, I had no clue what she really meant. “I don’t want to be anywhere else.”“I don’t…” she exhaled sharply. “I don’t want anything I do to be out of fear. Okay?”Fear. A giggle escaped me.“Are you laughing at me?”“No. I was just trying not to think about it.”“About what?”“The fact that I’m...fucking, I’m scared.” I laughed again.“I’m not going to let him touch you,” Edythe said. “Or your father. Neither of you will be alone until this is over. Okay?”“I can’t go back to sleep,” I told her. “We could watch TV on my computer. Or something.”“Do what you like. I’ll go back outside.”I pushed up a little. “I’m not going to let you just sit outside all night. That’s ridiculous, Edythe.”“It’s what’s best,” Edythe said. “Please let me.”Her voice was still wrong, still flat and scary. “No,” I said. “I won’t.” I laid flat and stared at the ceiling, determined to keep silent watch alongside her.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Bella
I went to school. I didn’t know what else to do. I brushed my hair and got dressed like normal, drove to school like normal, and talked to my classmates like normal. At least, I was trying to be normal. The problem was that every word anyone said to me had to travel through a thick veil of suppressed panic. Two different teachers asked me if I was feeling alright, and I had to smile and assure them I was fine. The girl in the seat in front of me in Trig had to turn to ask me to stop tapping my foot beneath her desk.I felt Jessica watching me long before she said anything. It came at lunch, after I had shrugged my way through a volley of questions from Mike about Charlie’s hunt for the bear.“Where’s your girlfriend?” She asked quasi-snidely, glancing over my shoulder. “Usually they all skip as a family, don’t they?”Sleep had never really come. I slipped in and out of it, and whenever I said anything, Edythe immediately answered. I had cajoled her into telling me some more stuff about her, and she described a trip to Paris in the 1950’s. I wasn’t sure how true any of it was, but it had taken on the cadence of a fairy tale and had lulled me into a sleep-like trance like a bedtime story. I dreamt of Edythe with long false eyelashes and trousers, holding a toy poodle in front of the Eiffel Tower, a be-suited Dr. Cullen at her side, Hepburn and Peck without the romance. Of course, waking returned me quickly to dread. And Edythe was gone. It was Alice who greeted me, chipper and excited to coach me on a cover story.“The flu,” I said. “Her and Rosalie both.”Jess’ eyebrows were high, and Mike stared open-mouthed at me. I had let her call Edythe my girlfriend, even just as a joke. My back was to the Cullens’ table, but I knew Rosalie was somewhere watching over Charlie. Edythe was running a patrol with the wolves, and Jake was probably trying to provoke her.“Oh,” Jessica said, frowning at me in what might have been real concern. “Well, you look kind of sick, too, no offense.”“I’m not sick,” I said. Jess and Mike exchanged a look, and Angela rubbed my shoulder consolingly.Alice walked me to Biology after lunch. “You’re gonna need to buck up, Swan. Acting human isn’t always easy, but you need to try.”“I am trying,” I said. Alice put her arm through mine.“Charlie will work late again tonight. Can you go to the reservation after school and stay with Sam Uley’s wife?”“Yeah,” I said. If sticking with Emily freed everyone else from having to worry about me, I could do it. “What will you do?”Alice smiled, all but convincing. “Some hunting. Don’t worry about it.”“Okay,” I said, like not worrying would be possible.____________________________ As directed, I drove to La Push after school. In my stupor, it didn’t occur to me until I was parked in front of her house that Emily might not know I was coming – in fact, she probably didn’t. I sat in Thing with my cell phone in my hand for three minutes before calling my mother.It was a normal call. I told her about an A-plus I’d received on an English paper, and she told me about a succulent she had kept alive for nearly two weeks now. She asked when I would be flying home to see her. I told her I still hadn’t decided on Thanksgiving or Christmas. When I looked up and saw Emily Uley standing on the front porch of her house, watching me, I brought the call to a close and waved, picking my way across the stones that led across her wet yard.“I was told to come here,” I said, praying Jacob was inside. “I – I can go home if you don’t want me here. I should have called ahead, I’m sorry.”Emily was only a few years older than me. I hadn’t really talked to her a lot – usually when I was here the boys were being rowdy and silence wasn’t an issue. Today she wore an oversized black hoodie that read Peninsula College in green. The hood was drawn over her head, shoulder-length black hair spilling out at the sides. She had runner’s legs, sharp and toned under leggings, and bare feet. “Come inside,” she said, holding the door for me. I removed my shoes at the threshold, looking around the room. Same as the last time I’d been there, but sadly devoid of teenaged werewolves. In that moment, I would have accepted any one of them, even Paul.“Make yourself at home,” Emily said airily, sinking into an armchair in the corner and picking up a book. I sat on the couch, sinking low into the cushion. The TV was on but muted, playing old NBC sitcoms.Emily was young, beautiful in that glowing, college athlete way. No makeup, flawless skin, thin but strong. Rain drilled against the roof and windows, turning to sleet every few minutes.“Your dad know you’re here?” Emily asked over her book. She had a perpetually wry voice.“He’s working,” I said. Emily raised an eyebrow. “Why?”She closed her book slowly. “I find myself looking after a lot of teenagers these days. Everyone’s mad at their dad, for one reason or another.”I guessed Jake had told her about Billy, too. Or she had just inferred it. I remembered what Jake had said about hormones and emotions. “I bet that’s difficult,” I said.“It’s not that bad,” she said. “The hard part is keeping them fed. At least some of their parents are paying us for the food.”I had nearly bitten all of my fingernails to the quick and wrapped them together in my lap to stop myself now. I could feel exhaustion thick in my voice as I feigned interest, or at least feigned the will to speak. “Why do they pay you?”Emily gave me a sad smile. “It takes a village to manage a wolf pack. I’m trying to help Sam any way that I can, which usually means just being here in case someone gets ripped apart or gets kicked out of their house for starting a fight with Stepmom.” She plucked at her shirt. “I was a nurse, briefly. Patched Paul up as much as I could.”“I’m really sorry,” I said. “For my part in this.”“Jake likes you, you know. He’s so torn up over it.”“I know,” I said, drawing my feet up. “I just want it to be over.”“You and me both, sister. But until then, you come over here any time you want to. Just don’t get Sam in trouble with Daddy Swan, alright?”“Alright,” I said weakly, trying to smile._________________________ Somehow, I dropped into uneasy sleep on the couch. Embry shook me awake a bit later, after the sun had dropped. When he told me the time, I hurried to gather my things and thanked Emily again. My neck ached every time I turned to try and see the shape of a wolf following me home.Charlie was already home. I rushed inside, trying to look casual. “Dad? I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to stay out so late. I fell asleep...”He was on the couch. I saw, immediately, that something was wrong.“They were fishing Tassel Creek,” Charlie told me, pale and unshaven, the collar of his work shirt unbuttoned and much tugged-upon. “We think the bear smelled their catches, or it’s probably rabid. Must be, to be moving around so much on us.”He looked completely defeated. If there weren’t McDonalds wrappers in the trash I would have insisted on trying to cook for him. It was the only thing I could do. I reminded myself that in this instance, the truth was the worst possible thing I could tell him.Upstairs, Alice was rifling through my closet. “Do you have anything designer? Just one single item?”“Where’s Edythe?” I asked. I had been hoping she would come back again tonight.Alice pulled out a ruffly maroon blouse, stroking the sleeves. “Still patrolling. With the others. Why?”She wasn’t gloating. She probably didn’t know the things Edythe and I had said to each other the night before. “Is everyone okay?”“Yes, of course,” Alice said, hanging the blouse on the closet doorknob. “Wear that tomorrow. It’s cute.”School. Again. The weekend was still two days away. “What does the future look like?” I asked, sitting at the edge of my bed.“All I can be sure of is the rain,” she told me. Her hair was clearly damp, but her clothes were dry. “I just came to tell you you’ve got one of the wolves tonight. Edythe and I have work to do.”I frowned at her. I didn't want Edythe to have work to do. I wanted Edythe here. “Which wolf?”“The gray one.”I wasn’t sure if that was Jared or Quil. “He’s out there right now?”“Yup. Get some sleep tonight, don’t stress yourself out.”“He can’t sit outside all night,” I said, crossing to the window Alice had left open. I could make out no detail in the dark expanse, and if Charlie was still in the living room he would definitely hear me calling Quil’s name into the night. That might raise some questions. “Tell him he can come in.”“I think he’s better off outside,” Alice said quickly. “At least as a wolf he can talk to his friends.”“Right.” I leaned forward, miserable. Alice smoothed her hand over the top of my head and then her lips pecked my forehead in a kiss. She smelled a lot like Edythe – almost exactly the same – and I flushed with embarrassment at the aching that filled my chest.“I’ll see you at school,” Alice said. “If you need anything, call me.”I nodded, and Alice disappeared in the next instant, a light draft pulling my hair toward the window.__________________________ Saturday was just as rainy, but even colder. I hadn’t slept any better without Edythe in my room. Emily’s house was a warm respite.“Being a wolf messes with your metabolism,” she explained to me, taking the lid off of a slow cooker on the stove. “After the change, Sam couldn’t taste spicy food anymore. I had to get creative.”She took from a produce bag a fistful of gnarled, bumpy red peppers. I’d seen enough crap YouTube to know what they were. “Carolina Reapers.”She smiled. “My aunt up in Makah grows them. Ever had one?”“No, and I don’t intend to start.”“You’re no fun, sister.”She had me start a second pot of chili just for the two of us. Helping her kept me from checking my phone or destroying my fingernails for a few minutes. I tried to actually learn from her, too – Jacob had told me she was an amazing cook. She directed me to ingredients without checking any recipes. Maybe I would get better at it the longer I lived with Charlie, the longer I practiced. I had never realized spices could go stale – I’d have to replace everything in Charlie’s cupboard.Emily chopped the Reaper peppers with latex gloves on, leaving in the seeds – assuring me she had tested this enough to know that we needed to go whole hog. “Paul, come show Bella she doesn’t need to worry.”Paul had been asleep on the floor when I had arrived after school, entire body and face hidden beneath a quilt. At her beckoning he came over to us, letting Emily stick a long piece of Carolina reaper on to his tongue. He chewed and swallowed, grimacing only for a second.“Yeah, it’s hot,” he said succinctly.I knew the pepper was hot enough to reduce grown men to tears and hysterics. Paul smiled bashfully at my shock.“Thank you for the demonstration,” Emily said, snapping the gloves off and throwing them away. She replaced the lid on the slow cooker after stirring the peppers into it. “Bella, chop the onions? I’m gonna claim the shower before you degenerates use all our hot water.”She hip-checked Paul on her way past, which he barely seemed to notice. I rinsed the Chef’s knife and started on the onions, going very slowly. I was much more likely than the normal human to chop a finger off. After about a minute I had to look up to blink away onion tears.Paul was still in the kitchen, watching me. “Want me to take over?” He asked. “It doesn’t bother me.”“Okay,” I said, after the initial shock. I washed my hands in the sink, watching him out of the corner of my eye. He chopped much faster and more precisely than I could, and it looked like some of the tension had fallen out of his shoulders. Maybe he was as anxious as I was.“I never really apologized,” he said, unprompted. “For scaring you.”I wiped at my eyes, leaning back against the countertop. “No harm, no foul. I hear you got what you deserved from Quil.” It was meaner than I intended, or maybe it was exactly the right amount of mean. Paul smiled at me. It instantly changed his face, and I gaped. He was sort of a looker.“I guess I did,” he demurred.I escaped the following awkward silence by sitting on the back porch. Cold seeped into me from the cold wood, all the way to my bones. It felt better to worry when I was shivering than when I was warm. I picked dead weeds out of the earth and pulled them to shreds in my fingers. Wind snatched them away when I released them. You could have been on an island somewhere with Edythe by now, I thought bitterly. I tormented myself with that for a while, thinking of sand and rum and long legs. Eventually, I drifted back indoors. Emily cracked a few windows to ventilate the smell, telling me to keep doing homework instead of helping her clean the kitchen. Nothing came to me, so I set to doodling in the margins of my notebook.Emily and Paul talked in low voices, casting me looks that they thought I couldn’t see. At noon, he left without a word. She stood at the window, letting out a breath of relief when Sam came through the door a moment later.“We didn’t find anything,” he tossed in my direction. He was nice enough, just short with everyone. I nodded, chewing on my lip. No news was better than bad news. “He’s tired,” Emily explained quietly after Sam went to their bedroom without saying anything else. I looked down at my notebook. The pack was back to suffering long hours. Thanks to me.The door opened again, and Jacob stepped through. I jumped up, tears pricking the corners of my eyes as I hugged him. “How is everyone?” I asked eagerly. “Edythe?”He chuckled against the top of my head. “She hasn’t calmed down any, that’s for sure. Is that chili?”Emily scooped him a bowl with barely contained excitement. I sat across from him at the kitchen table, watching with a grimace as he shoveled down several bites. After the third, his eyes went wide and he coughed. “I think I need some water.”Emily clapped her hands and grabbed a glass. “I don’t care if Sam bites my head off. He has to try this.” She made another bowl and went down the hall to wake him up.“He might actually kill her,” Jake noted, watching her go. When it was just us, he turned back to me, suddenly serious. “Is there, um, something I should know?” He asked.His tone unnerved me. “What? No. Why?”His deep brown eyes searched mine, worried. “Alice found me on patrol and started saying a bunch of weird stuff.”“Like what?” I hadn’t heard from Alice in almost a day.“Like…” He set down his spoon and downed the glass of water. “Like that you need to be watched, or some shit.”Dread churned in my stomach. “Me? What did she see?”“You think that little freak told me anything?” He said testily. “That’s all I got for you. I was like, no shit Bella needs to be watched, she’s got Patrick Biteman coming for her ass.”“I’m not sure I enjoy the pun,” I told him. He winked at me. “But I don’t know what she’s talking about.”“Here I thought you spoke bloodsucker,” he said. “Let me take you home?”“Take me?” I didn’t want him to waste forty minutes taking me home that he could spend sleeping. “Come on, don’t let Alice get to you.”“I miss the truck,” he said, snatching my keys from the other side of the table before I could. “Let’s go.”______________________ Edythe didn’t come to school the next Monday, which made it three days of absence and five since I had last seen her. She had escaped me by going to Alaska on my first day at school. It had been three days then, too. Was she avoiding me? Did she regret telling me she liked me? Would me texting her make it better or worse?I had a message open to the recently added contact named Edythe Cullen. It would be my first, which made it too important to just send. I had no idea what I would even say.The classroom door squeaked open and I clicked my phone off, shoving it in my pocket so I wouldn’t be caught. Mrs. Banner poked her head in and beckoned to me. “Bella, a moment?”There was no way she had seen me texting, and even then she wasn’t a teacher that confiscated phones. I shrugged at Angela, who had taken Edythe’s empty seat to help me with Trig homework.Charlie was out there. Uniform, gun, badge, the whole shebang.“Look who caught me in the hall,” Mrs. Banner said, laughing nervously. “He was on his way here looking for you.”“What’s going on?” I asked. Charlie nodded at my teacher, who politely ducked back into the classroom. I met Angela’s curious eyes as the door closed. “Dad.”“Bells,” he said, clearly bracing himself to deliver bad news. My stomach flipped so aggressively bile actually shot up into my throat. “I just wanted to see ‘ya. Make sure you were – ““Another attack?” I asked, cutting him off at the pass. “Why are you at the school?”He sagged. “Had to come pull Ben Cheney out from class. You know him?”“That’s Angela’s boyfriend.” I sat with Ben at lunch, at assemblies. “Is he okay?”“He is,” Charlie said with a strange inflection. “He was supposed to go meet his cousins up at the Fairholme campgrounds this afternoon.”I stared at him. I didn’t know Ben’s cousins, but I knew they went to school with us. Our age or a bit younger.“Dead,” Charlie said, looking past me down the hall. “Both of them.”The air left my lungs like I’d been punched.“I haven’t been up there, yet. It’s some…thirty miles from the last site.” His eyes were red-rimmed, clothes wrinkled. Under the fluorescent white hall lights we probably both looked like ghosts. “If it is a bear…”“If?” “I don’t know,” he said with thick exasperation. “I really don’t. I just wanted to see you. Promise me you’ll go straight home after school. I don’t want to risk anything.”My breaths came faster and faster. “Can I go home now?”Charlie seemed to really look at me for the first time. “Yeah, of course,” he said. “I’ll sign you out.”“Angela’s in my class,” I said. “I have to tell her.”“We’re just telling the families, Bells. Angela will hear when everyone else does.”Then why did you tell me? I wondered. Like I could have kept that secret all day. I went back into the room, everyone looking curiously at me.“Is everything okay?” Angela asked me quietly. I packed my stuff away and shook my head no, unable to look at her. “Text me,” she hissed, completely unaware of what I had been told. Mrs. Banner didn’t stop me or ask where I was going. I let Charlie walk me to the front office, and he sent me home. I didn’t see Ben or his parents or aunt and uncle there, but the women at the front desk were openly crying.They were dead. Austin and Dylan Richardson, Charlie told me, and I did recognize their names. I had been so worried about my indestructible friends, I hadn’t stopped to think of the other people in my life.I felt as horrible as if I’d done it myself. Monster seemed too nice a word. He – James – had made my safety something twisted. Something with a body count.There was a man standing by my truck as I walked across the quiet lot, and my heart stopped before I realized it wasn’t a man at all, but a tall boy. Jake, and he looked haggard. I wasn’t used to seeing him fully clothed anymore, but even that was done halfway. He had jeans and a sweater, but still no shoes.I walked into his arms and started crying. “Come on,” he said, rubbing my back. “Let’s go. I don’t want Charlie to see me out here.”I pushed my keys into his hands, curling into his side as he started the car.“Dr. Fang and Emmett followed the trails straight up to the north border,” he told me. “They were minutes behind them. Alice actually saw it coming this time, I guess, but not soon enough.”I watched misty rain trail across the window. “I don’t know where Fairholme is.”Jake’s thumb stroked my palm where he held it on his knee. “Northeast of here, about halfway to Port Angeles, I guess.”“Did you see it? The bodies?”He hesitated. “Sam did.”“What did it look like?”“Bad,” he said. “Worse than the others. Did –did you know them?”I knew them. Not well, not friends, but yes, I knew them.I hadn’t consulted any maps, but the other kills had been closer to town. Enough people at school had been talking about it, talked about their dads hanging out in their own backyards with shotguns. It had been close, so why would they go so far away now? And maybe it made sense, but why would they go farther and still murder two boys from Forks?I could make one guess.Jake made a hissing sound with his breath. “Fuck, Bella. I’m so sorry.”Intentionally or not, a message had been sent. Getting through my guard hadn’t even been necessary. Come out, come out, wherever you are.Jacob walked me to the door, then followed me inside my house. I sat on the couch and listened to him raiding our fridge. Tears kept choking me and I had to breathe slowly to put them at bay. I didn’t want to make Jacob upset.“Are you hungry?” He called from the kitchen.“No.”He brought me a bowl of raisin bran. “I already poured the milk, so you should probably eat it or it’ll be ruined.”I smiled at the effort, taking the bowl from him and scraping a few spoonfuls into my mouth.“Vampires should be here, soon,” he said, a hastily constructed turkey sandwich dangling from his hand. “Hope you don’t get Barbie. She’s no fun to talk to.”I doubted Rosalie would even come inside. It had been Alice the last two nights taking the role of vampire in the corner of my bedroom. It was sort of like a sleepover, if sleepovers were nothing but stress and dread and one participant didn’t even sleep but instead flipped through all your books and sighed loudly at nothing.Jake turned on the TV and started flipping through channels. The cereal was chalk in my mouth. Ten minutes later, there was a light knock on the door. Jake threw the lock and Alice walked in, backpack on her shoulder.“Any news?”“Don’t you think I would have said that already?” Alice said waspishly.“Yeah, yeah. Take care of her. See ya, Bells!” He saluted me.Alice glared until he had shut the door. She turned to me, unsmiling. “They were good people,” she said. “I’m sorry.”“It’s not your fault.”Her eyes narrowed. “Then who?”I shook my head, eyes stinging. “Not yours.” Or Angela’s, or Ben’s. Or a bear’s, for that matter.Alice crossed her arms sternly, stopping in front of me. “Tell me what you’re planning.”“What?” I asked. She just looked at me, her face hard and closed off. Suspicious. I remembered what she had said to Jacob a few days ago – that I needed to be watched. “Alice, I’m not planning anything!”“We’re doing everything we can right now, okay? You just have to wait.”“Oh, you’re doing everything you can?” I stood to face her. “Then why are people still dying? Huh? And what exactly am I being accused of?”She looked less and less angry as my voice rose to a yell. “I don’t know. It was...just a glimpse.”“What did you see?” I asked. She looked away.“I can only watch so many things at once. But...I don’t think this will last much longer.” Her unspoken one way or another hung in the air.I took a deep breath, trying not to explode on her. “When will Charlie be home?”“Whenever he’s done at the campground,” she said. Something in her eye still looked distrustful. “Maybe ten or eleven.”I shuffled past her to the kitchen, intent on busying myself so I didn’t have to talk to her. I didn’t ask where Edythe was.Not much longer, I silently agreed. But long enough.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Edythe
I looked into the unseeing, hazy eyes of the Richardson boys and realized I had expected more time. They were teenagers, innocents, the same age as Bella. The same age, and exactly as fragile. The tracker was cold, and calculating – had some facet of his gift marked them as targets? Had he known how close they were to Bella, even tangentially?Like these dead boys, I had expected more time. I wanted the privilege of coming to understand myself at an appropriate speed. I would have savored it, once I had accepted it. Vampires only loved once, and the change was irreparable.I had seen what happened to vampires who lost their mates. The Volturi had shown me that kind of madness, and now I could feel it growing in myself. If Bella died, was murdered, I would never be myself again. This situation had pulled me to the edge, my love a weighted anchor tied to my waist.Alice could see shadows of the plans I was drawing together. I couldn’t help it. The edge inched closer with every second that passed. We would win, or the tracker would, and I hoped for the former but needed something solid to fall back on, once the pain of existing was too much and a slow death wouldn’t suffice. I was glad for Jacob Black’s promise to kill me if anything happened to Bella. It would be complicated and difficult to kill myself. I didn’t know anyone who would do it for me aside from him.I would have loved her slowly, not like this.She slept fitfully inside her house. I sat against the tree in front of her window, listening to the sheets whisper as she tossed and turned. The moist rustle of skin against skin and eyes moving beneath heavy lids. Was she in pain? Afraid? I couldn’t know. I had to distance myself now so she wouldn’t see what was happening.There was only one other person who I loved enough to want to hide from, but of course he knew where to find me. Alice had sent him. Carlisle approached with trepidation. The black night was bright to our eyes – he could see me as clearly as in daylight.I was ashamed. Through his thoughts, I could see how bad I looked. Go home, he told me, I’ll take over here.“No.”At least go eat, he prodded, taking off his jacket. I was wearing the same ripped clothing from the night we had found James. “I can stay here while you do.”“Not hungry,” I muttered, taking the jacket out of politeness. He frowned at my eyes – dark brown, now. This was the longest I had gone without feeding since Bella arrived. 
You don’t need to be stronger than him. Pride itself is a weakness.
I pulled the jacket on slowly, trying not to rip it. “I threw up,” I told him.Carlisle went silent, measuring his thoughts carefully as only he and Alice knew how.“I threw all of it up,” I repeated, grasping for meaning. “Have you ever heard of that?”
What did you eat?
"Deer. Rabbit. Squirrel. All the same.”Listening to his thoughts spin cursorily over the options did nothing for my mood. He wondered if the rabbit had a blood disease. If, like the old tales, I had drunk from it too long after it died. Useless preponderance. If it was possible, he would have already heard about it.“I’m dying,” I said, voice catching. “You won’t even think it, but it’s true.”I was scaring him. He’d never seen me quite like this – not even in the twenties. He would use the word vulnerable, but in truth I was just weak. Mentally, and now physically. I threw my arms around him, seeking comfort like a scared child.“I didn’t realize,” I babbled nonsensically. “I didn’t know I could feel so much.” Even when Jasper had showed me his version of this, it was muted, faded to sepia. A tofu solution that could never compare to the meat of the thing.He hugged me back, glad that Esme hadn’t seen this yet. “You are not dying,” he said simply. “It’s all in your head.”I flinched in shock, but the thing rolling down my face was just a raindrop. Not a tear. I could not cry because I was a vampire.“You should try again.” I could go find you something larger. A big cat.He would have to go very far to get something like that. “I feel nauseous just thinking about, Carlisle,” I said. I pushed my hair behind my ears, stepping out of the embrace. I couldn’t recall the last time we had hugged. “I can’t – “Bella whispered my name in her sleep. The need to be with her – to feel every breath against my chest like it was my own – was becoming unbearable. It was too much, much too soon. I hadn’t quite caught up to it, intellectually speaking.Carlisle’s eyes moved to the window. “You remember when you woke up,” he said. “You were overwhelmed. The sensations, the emotions – ““It’s different.”“– It was too much. You’d never experienced anything like it. You said your brain was on fire.”I had said that, and I had meant it. The change from human to vampire was horrible all around, but in addition to all the physical pain, my brain had expanded in a way I couldn’t comprehend.“This is different.”“It isn’t.”“You don’t feel like this,” I countered. I had watched him the whole time – everything I knew of love I knew from him “You don’t – you wouldn’t let yourself.”His voice was purposeful and calm. “You conflate the thought with the feeling, because it’s what you see in others. You’re not like Jasper – he feels so much in people but doesn’t understand them. You can fit around these feelings, Edythe, they’re just new.”“I can barely think, Carlisle.”“Yes, that’s part of it.” He smiled, but not at my expense. “Our family has never had cause to work together in this way, but we’re very strong. Everyone is as dedicated as you are to keeping Bella – everyone in Forks – safe. We’d do this wherever we were.”We would. When we were settled together – or in pairs, or alone as I sometimes had been – we turned other vampires away, told them not to hunt our cities or towns. They always listened.It would be one thing if James had done this to spite us. It was another to be slaughtering humans left and right. It was lucky Forks was so insular. Too many murders, and the news stories would reach the Volturi. I wondered how James had escaped them thus far. Maybe he’d never targeted a group as large as us, made such a big mess.I could see it through his eyes – the chess board. Cullens, wolves, a single human in the midst of both, the individual weaknesses to exploit against Alice, against me. But how did he know?“Edythe,” Carlisle said gently. I focused on him with some effort. “We will keep our heads, and everything will be fine. Say it?”I couldn’t, not even to humor him.________________________________ Rosalie came at sunrise, ready to meet Charlie Swan and follow him to work. She waited with me in the darkness of the trees.Alice can’t see anything, big surprise, She thought to me. The wolves have spread out their lines, just in case.Alice had gotten to her, too. It was all over her thoughts. She was supposed to talk me down, but I really didn’t see that happening. Poor choice of sibling for the task, Alice.Bella’s father woke up before his alarm. He carefully opened Bella’s door to check on her, and I swarmed the brief image like a hungry shark. She was his entire world. He was devastated that things were going this badly when she just moved here. If only he knew his daughter was the most extraordinarily unlucky human on the face of the planet.She had been right about leaving with me – it would destroy him.Rosalie examined my current state with a sneer. I can’t tell if you’re trying to be the hero or trying to get yourself killed sooner rather than later. Don’t you want to live? Be with her?Chief Swan sat and ate breakfast. A microwave sandwich. “He’ll be leaving soon,” I said.She put her hands on my shoulders and forced me to face her. Her eyes and mind were more earnest than I had seen in a long time. Was she actually going to try this?“Go ahead and go to the Volturi if you’re just going to give up. You’d never win a fight with him. Not like this.”The thought of James, close enough for me to get my hands on… “Alice would warn me.”She pulled my phone from the waistband of my jeans. “It’s almost dead!”“She’d call Bella. I would hear.”Rosalie put manicured hands to her hips. “You’re risking both of your lives acting like this. I care for Bella more than that. And I know I haven’t been very effusive in this sentiment, but I care for you, too.”She began to lose her R’s. Her accent always came out when she was upset. I remembered when she was human. We’d lived in the same New York town for a while, which meant crossing paths once or twice. She was always as rude to me as common courtesy would allow. At first, she hated me for my beauty. After she became immortal and obtained that beauty for herself, it was because of my personality. I wasn’t vibrant enough for her. I didn’t indulge her shallowness. We lived apart for long enough it didn’t matter. Recently, she had been nurturing a deep confusion and hurt that after all this time, my preferences didn’t include her.I saw none of that now, and it was strange. I didn’t know Rosalie was capable of being selfless with me.“I can’t eat,” I whispered. If only Carlisle would be a little less discretionary. I wouldn’t have to repeat it. “I’ve been throwing it up.”Her frown recoiled in confusion, then annoyance. “Who are you, Romeo?” She pointed a finger toward the house. “Drink from Bella. God knows you could stomach that!”“Shut up,” I said, waking up a bit. I saw what she was trying to do, but knowing didn’t stop my reaction. Listening to her rarely employed compassion wasn’t fun anymore.Maybe I’ll give it a try, she thought. “It’s been so long since I’ve had human. And her shelf life is about to expire – “I punched her. Or at least, I tried to. I was the best fighter in our group, not for skill but for the fact that no one could move without telegraphing it in their mind. Things had never gotten physical between Rose and I – our fights were mostly verbal, with Emmett to intervene later on. Nothing had ever crossed the line so thoroughly as this, and I was very eager to finally, literally knock her down a peg.She caught my arm and spun me, pushing a forearm against my throat.Too slow, she thought savagely. You’re dead.I pulled away, shaken. Too slow. I had been too slow. I looked down at my arm in horror.“If you won’t eat, let Emmett take over here,” she said, already texting him. “Go find Alice and Jasper. Do something instead of wasting away.”“Not Emmett,” I said. “He’ll try to talk to her.”She shot me a dangerous look. “Someone will be here soon.” We watched Chief Swan walk out to the cruiser. Would you rather go with him?“No. I’ll wait.”“You do that.”When she was gone, and I knew time was short, I couldn’t fight it anymore. Bella’s heartbeat was slow and steady, uninterrupted by the screech of her window. I was weak, absolutely. But not in this way. Not to her blood.Pieces of Bella and her father dotted the small bathroom. Neither seemed much for clutter. I observed the basic miscellanea: a razor sitting haphazardly at the edge of the sink, a towel hanging on the shower rod. Ownership determined only by scent. Bella’s was sweet, floral. Rich. Chief Swan’s was similar, but so much more diluted. A drop in an Olympic-sized swimming pool. I washed my face with her soap, smoothing the hot water over my skin.My reflection was no comfort. It had been a long time since I’d gone this far.Her heart rate increased as she entered the last stage of sleep. She was cold and had tucked the blankets up high. Her dark hair spilled in curls over the pillow. I heard the rustling of each strand as she turned onto her side. This scent was like flower petals to me now, sweet with prickling thorns that detracted not from the beauty. Blood flooded her cheeks and turned her lips the color of amaryllis. She had asked me to lay next to her.Bella inhaled deeply and expelled a breathy sigh. I fisted my hands in Carlisle’s jacket. The fabric ripped apart like butter.You gonna make me come up there? Emmett thought tauntingly.One last look, and I left.__________________ 
Bella
Forks was under a curfew by Tuesday morning. Charlie had warned me the night before, so I wasn’t surprised at the texts I received as I woke up. I decided to not go to school. The thought of seeing Ben or Angela was too much.I dressed mechanically and gathered my keys and wallet. I was going to go to Emily’s for the day. She had made me feel better, and I needed that desperately. Whichever vampire was watching me today didn’t seem to want to talk to me – I called out from my window once. Rosalie or Jasper, I figured. But I trusted I wasn’t alone as I drove to the reservation.My phone rang as I turned onto Emily’s street. It wasn’t any contact I had saved. Just a number, Washington digits. I almost didn’t answer, but it could have been any of the Cullens trying to reach me.“Hello?”“Bella? Bella?!”“Dad?” I sat up stiffly, slamming the brakes of my car. Silence. “Dad!”“Hello, Bella Swan.”It was a different voice now. A man’s. Deep and silky and dangerous.“Who – ““Don’t speak. Just say ‘Okay’.”I looked at Emily’s house. Could the wolves hear as well as vampires? I wasn’t sure there were any here. There weren’t any vampires. Not mine, anyway.“Okay,” I said, my voice a hollow rasp.“Don’t get out of your car,” he said slowly. “Don’t do anything at all. I don’t need to hurt your father, so please just do exactly as I say.”“Who is this?”“I thought I told you not to speak.”I broke into a cold sweat. No. No, this wasn’t what I thought it was. It couldn’t be.“Very good, Bella,” the voice crooned after a short pause. “Now, you’ve been spending a lot of time with your shapeshifter friends, haven’t you?”My throat locked in some sort of convulsion.“You probably should have spent more time with your father. The sheriff’s station was very easy to get into. Say okay.”“Okay,” I choked out.“Don’t worry, Bella. I won’t do anything rash…not if you agree to come pay me a little visit. Now you can ask me where.”It was hard to force air up my throat, to make a sound that wasn’t a scream. “Where?”James made a noise of satisfaction. “It’s someplace you remember very well. Do you know the street in Port Angeles where you were almost attacked?”Edythe was right to have worried. He was two steps ahead of us, the entire time. I thought back, back, back, to that night in Port Angeles. He had been there? Had his been one of those faces leering at me?“Yes,” I whispered.“Excellent. Now, you’re going to come and see us. You’re going to come alone. And you’re going to come now. Do you think you could do that? Answer yes or no.”I thought of Alice. “No.”He didn’t sound pleased anymore. “No, you can’t? Or no, you won’t?”“I can’t.”“Well, I suggest you get very creative. You have one hour. Oh, and Bella?”“What.”"You must know enough about me to realize how quickly I would know if you told someone or tried to bring anyone along with you. And you must know how little time I would need to deal with your father if that were the case. Victoria is watching, so act accordingly.”The line went dead. My joints were frozen – I couldn’t move my fingers to drop the phone. Port Angeles was an hour and ten minutes away. I was already late.How could he have gotten past the Cullens? If they knew Charlie was gone, then surely everyone would be out looking. Surely I would know.Or… Or, something else had happened. Alice said it, didn’t she? That being immortal made you care about human life next to zilch. That Rosalie had been complaining, that she seemed to care the least about patrols and watches – I had caught onto other things, just by the way Edythe and Alice talked about her. Oh, God, but that didn’t matter. My father was going to die and I was the reason. I wouldn’t survive that. My life wasn’t worth it. I shut my eyes, thinking of Edythe and Jacob. They loved me. I couldn’t do it to them. But there was nothing I could think of to get around what had to be done. Something…I pressed myself. There has to be something. You can’t die without a fight.It was as easy as calling Alice. But Victoria was watching – how close was she? How close would she need to be to hear me? I looked right, at the wide expanse of trees, and left, at the ocean. The trails always led to the ocean. Victoria could have walked right out of the water and been here. I didn’t have time to get any answers.But I did have to get to Port Angeles. Alone. This must have been what Alice had seen. There was no way she wasn’t watching. If I left now, left the pack, she would see it. And Charlie would die.I clutched the steering wheel. “Come on, come on…”I might only have a few seconds before my indecision tipped her off. Unless…My eyes fell on a pen in the passenger seat.Unless I stayed in her blind spot.__________________________  Edythe  We had found a trail. A few days old, perhaps, so faint as to be nearly useless. It clung to a fern here, a fallen trunk there. We took turns with it, trying to ingrain it in our memories. I was very familiar with the pack mind by now and heard it in advance of any footsteps.“What’s happening?” Jasper asked as I swiveled, waiting for their approach.“Ah, there it goes,” Alice moaned.Bella sent us, Jacob thought. It was he and Sam running toward us. Said you called, that you needed us.Did you find them? Sam asked eagerly.“Who did Bella talk to?” I called back, mind racing. “Who needed you?” As far as I knew, Carlisle and Emmett were together, and Rosalie and Esme were with Chief Swan. No one was alone and vulnerable.Alice, Jacob thought. She said it was Alice.“What?” Alice asked impatiently. I stared at her.Anyone fucking home? Jacob asked. He bounded toward us fast enough to strain his considerable stamina. He got to us first, teeth bared, running in a circle around the three of us. He took in the darkness of my eyes, the purples and yellows in the skin just beneath, with faint repulsion.This isn’t right, Sam thought, looking around nervously.Edythe! Jacob snapped. Bella said you needed help. What the fuck with?Very deliberately, I shook my head. The wolves looked at each other while I repeated them.“No,” Alice said. “I didn’t. I didn’t call Bella.”
She told me you did. She was freaking the hell out.
“What exactly did she say?” I asked. “Think over the memory.”Jacob indulged me. He had been at Emily Uley’s house. Bella ran in, crying, claiming that Alice needed help badly, right now.I can’t just leave you here, Jake was sure to remember saying.Please, Jake, Bella had begged. Go. I’ll be right here.He had thought this was it – the big fight. He had run, calling for Sam to join him and for Jared to go stay at Emily’s.Jake, Bella had said again, as he left. She had pointed to a chair at the table. I’ll be right. Here.I could not think why Bella would do this. I didn’t understand what she thought was going to happen to Alice out here.Like a flame flickering to life, a new mind joined Sam and Jacob and the silent others.Guys, Jared thought. Bella isn’t here. Emily just – she said she ran to her car and bolted right after Jake left.There was an explosion of talking in the pack mind, and total silence in the trees.“Bella’s gone,” I whispered. Jasper put a hand on my shoulder and I shook it off, turning on Alice. “You saw it again, didn’t you? Didn’t you?!” She had tried to hide it from me. Something Bella would decide – something that ended in grief.“You left her alone?” Alice shrieked at Jacob. “What did I tell you!”What’s she talking about, Jacob? Sam asked. Jared, stay with Emily.A howl ripped through Jacob. Alice is right. This is my fault.“Where is she? Where did she go?” I yelled, crowding Alice, pushing her back. She shook her head in mute distress. She was looking frantically.It’s been less than an hour, Jacob thought. She can’t have gone far.“Alice!” I snapped. “Try harder!”“It doesn’t work that way!” Alice wailed. “She must be with a wolf!”She isn’t, Sam thought. The pack was getting antsy in confusion.“She used them,” Jasper said. “She sent them here to blind Alice.”“No,” I said. “No, no, no.”Maybe she just went for some milk? Embry thought weakly.But seriously, Jacob reasoned. Where the fuck could she be going? If she left in her car, then obviously she was okay, and wanted to leave. But she’d told me she would stay…I looked up at him, remembering something. “What did she point at? When you left, she pointed and said...”Jacob remembered in more detail. A tiny, desperate spark of hope lit up the darkness of my chest.“Tell Jared to go inside. Look around.”Is she serious? Jared thought apprehensively.“Just do it!”Sam blew air through his nose. Do it, Jared, he commanded.Jared phased out, leaving a painful quiet. Alice screwed her eyes shut, fingers on her temples. Jasper hovered between her and I. He was trying not to, but I still heard him think, No moving on from this.“You’re right,” I whispered. I was glad I had my plans.Jasper pulled out his cell phone, texting Rosalie. “Chief Swan hasn’t talked to Bella,” he said a moment later. “He’s still at the animal control office.”He and Alice exchanged words. I waited numbly for Jared.She was right, he thought as he finally phased in. In the chair. There’s a note.____________________ 
Bella
I didn’t let myself think about what was probably happening back home, or what would happen when I got to Port Angeles. Pushing my car as hard as I could kept me going at almost eighty up the highway. First my hands started to shake, then my legs, then it felt like my heart itself was vibrating at speeds that would kill me.I didn’t cry. Actually, the closer I got to the city, the less scared I was. Part of me had expected them to catch up, to stop me before I got two miles down the road. Now it didn’t look like that would happen. My plan had worked. I was doing this.I raced through the narrow streets of Port Angeles, where I had never driven on my own. It was still too early for people to be out and about. Every side street looked the same. When I was on my own that night, it was because I had walked myself in circles in the dark. It was all much different in the daylight.I saw a flash of blue and white and slammed on my brakes, throwing the Thing in reverse. A Forks police cruiser was parked in front of an empty storefront. A dilapidated, faded sticker looked morosely from the glass door. Sound Fly Fishing.I cut the engine, allowing myself three deep breaths. I made it. Just Charlie, I prayed to whoever was listening. Just let them save Charlie.My knees wobbled as I got out of Thing for maybe the last time. I let my hand trail over the round cab, looking up the street the way I’d come. This was definitely the place. I could almost see the men closing in on either side, or the headlights of Alice’s car as it squealed across the pavement. But there were no men, and there was no car. I was alone in this.It had been an hour and twenty minutes.The glass door was nearly opaque with dirt and dust. It creaked as I pulled it open, broken lock swinging against the handle. A swell of dust and fish-scented air blew past me, the brief outdoor light illuminating a large, empty, and very dirty room. Some clothing racks sat against the walls, and behind the counter were two hallways. When the door shut, it was very dark. He had picked a good spot, I had to give him that.“I’m here,” I said with a voice that sounded scared.The voice responded immediately, from behind me. “I didn’t think you had it in you, Miss Swan.”I pivoted, and there he was.His eyes were black – completely black, more pupil than the rest. His long, tangled blonde hair was tied at the back of his neck. His clothes were unremarkable. He could have been a tourist, but like all vampires there was something startling in his appearance. A cold beauty. He stood between me and the door and towered over me by at least a head. He was thin, but I knew his apparent musculature made zero difference.I squared my shoulders. “Where is he?”James tsked me, shaking his head and smiling like we were old friends meeting up for lunch. “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”He strolled toward me. I held still out of fear, my traitorous heart pounding. James touched me as casually as he had spoken to me, running an ice-cold finger down my cheek. I flinched away.“What is it about you…” He wondered. “You smell good, obviously. But you’re still just human. Hm.”I turned, keeping my eyes on him as he meandered further into the store. Now that the way to the door was clear, I thought, for an instant – run. “Your friends are very interesting. Playing human. Playing doctor. They won’t be happy.”If I ran now, it would all be for nothing.“So juvenile,” he said. “All that searching for me. Ironic.”“H-how is it ironic?”James trailed a long finger through the dust on the countertop. “I knew you would come for your father. In the end, it was easy.”Charlie. Was he back there, in one of those rooms? Unconscious, or already dead? The last thing we said to each other was ‘goodnight’. I didn’t even tell him I loved him.“I sometimes get a hunch,” James said. “When it comes to those I hunt. A sixth sense. It was too easy to get through your defenses. I became sort of … bored. I figured, why not make it a little more interesting? Make you come to me. Fear tastes so much better once it’s settled in.”My brain started to throw things at me, in a weak attempt to distract itself from the moment that was surely closing in. Jacob’s laugh, Edythe’s sweet smell. The way Angela spoke softly and was never angry. Once, when I was young, Renée had run over a squirrel with her car. I cried all night, heart heavy for the poor animal. It never occurred to me that the squirrel hadn’t seen it coming. There had been no fear.“Are you very scared now?”I nodded. He smiled.“That’s good.” He smiled wider as something occurred to him. “It’s the girl, isn’t it? Who will come after me?”“Probably.” Lying to Jacob broke my heart. It tore itself into smaller pieces now, thinking of Edythe. Everything we might have had. He grinned at me, and I wondered if he could hear it, the tearing.“I would like to rub it in, just a little bit. If you don’t mind. I mean, the answer was there all along. I waited for Alice to catch it and ruin my fun. It was quite a while ago, now. Ninety years?” He tapped his chin. “The only time my prey ever escaped.”Bemusement clouded my fear. “You know Alice?”He tilted his head, looking off into the past. “That vampire, who was so fond of her, made the choice that your friends were too stupid to make. When the old one knew I was after his little…project, he stole her from the asylum where he worked – I never will understand the obsession some of us seem to form with you – and as soon as he freed her, he made her safe. She’d been stuck in that black hole of a cell for so long, she hardly even noticed the pain.”He nodded at my confusion. “Oh, yes. A hundred years earlier and she would have been burned at the stake for her visions. As it was, they just threw her in the loony bin for shock treatments. By the time I found them, she was almost finished turning. There was no reason for me to touch her then.” He sighed. “I destroyed the old one in vengeance.”“You hunted her,” I breathed, astonished. “When she was human.”He gestured around us. “This is where I first saw you. Imagine my surprise when Alice swooped in to save you.  I was surprised to see her with the human-lovers. But I guess they’ll never know how fair this trade really was. I get you, and they get her. The one victim who escaped me. Quite an honor.”He came closer, and his eyes looked even darker than before. Light disappeared in them. “And she did smell so delicious. Even better than you do, no offense. You have a very nice smell.”The last few feet disappeared in a blur. I cried out in pain and nearly fell as he jerked my hair back. This had been a mistake. They weren’t going to get to me in time.“Where’s Charlie?” I gasped. He released my hair. I saw strands fall to the floor where he’d ripped some out. Tenderly, but with absolute strength, he took my wrist and drew it to his nose. I heard his teeth breaking my skin before I felt it, and then I did feel it. It hurt. Very, very badly. I sucked in a shocked breath, and he let go.“I really was so glad you came, Bella.” Blood dripped from his lips as I staggered back. I didn’t look at my hand. It was going numb. “Without even stopping to see if he was still at work. I imagine that’s where he is right now.”“You’re lying! I heard him!”He waved a cell phone, then stuck it in my face. I squinted at…“Facebook?” I said incredulously. But not just Facebook – my mother’s profile. The surreality of this faded when James clicked on a video. I had seen it before – something old and ripped off a camcorder. Me on the beach in diapers, waddling ahead of Charlie, who chased me away from the water’s edge.
“Bella! Bella! Hang on!”
“The marvels of modern technology,” James said derisively, tossing the phone to the side. It cracked against the wall and fell in a heap of glass. “Won’t be needing that anymore.”I stared at the floor. Charlie was never here. I would never see him again. We would never sit down and do my college applications. Never eat burgers at the diner again. I wouldn’t see Renée for Thanksgiving. How would she cope with my death? What would it do to Charlie when I was another victim of an animal he would never catch? Jacob would take it personally. This would kill him. Edythe…I wouldn’t even get one last look to take with me to death.Jess, Angela, Eric, Embry, Ben, Alice, Emmett – I didn’t get any goodbyes. I had given myself up, undone everything, for nothing.The tracker watched me drown in all of it, a delighted smile on his bloody face.“They’ll come after you,” I threatened. “They’re already on their way. I left a note.”He shrugged. That wasn’t good enough. I had to keep him talking. I didn’t want to die.“You can’t win against all of them. You’ll die.”“Not before you do,” he laughed.Then he threw me against the wall.I didn’t see him moving, didn’t feel where he touched me. I just felt weightless for a second. A clothing rack buckled against my back and then my head smashed against the floor. Drywall cracked and rained dust all around me. I gasped, and the particles flooded into my lungs, choking me. Pain exploded through the arm he hadn’t bitten.“Probably should have recorded this,” he muttered, frowning. “For your little friend to see. Shame.”I looked up in terror. James stepped on my leg. There was a sickening snap, and a harrowing scream. With a shock, I realized both had come from me. And James laughed – it was a deep, masculine, beautiful sound.It hurt so bad. I had wasted all my breath on the scream, and now had to go through the laborious process of taking in more air. It just made me cough. James had begun to bend down toward me. When no fresh pain came, I looked up again. He had turned toward the back halls.There was a sound like falling rock. The tracker stood, and all hell broke loose. _________________  Edythe  Time became something fluid and stretched. The space between Forks and Port Angeles, space I traversed by foot, seemed no more than a mile. I followed Alice to the location Bella had given us. Alice knows the place, she had written. Jacob and I barked out a plan to one another, and then I was in the back alley of the abandoned structure. Bricks turned to dust against my fingers. I raked a hole big enough to fit through, which James heard but could do nothing about.I’d brought a good distraction.The storefront was all glass, three panes of which shattered fantastically against the weight of a massive wolf body. James’ attention was split, and we had him.In the second he turned to meet me, eyes wide with shock, he did not move to defend himself. Instead, he went for the slumped, bleeding figure in the corner.Jacob’s teeth closed around his midsection before he could jump. They cut through the steel of his skin like it was just meat. James let out a guttural scream, wrapping his hands around Jacob’s throat. I reached out, took one of his arms, and pulled against the socket.  It was more difficult than I was prepared for, but Jacob shook him hard and there was a screech like rent metal and the arm came off entirely. I tossed it against the opposite wall, where it scrambled for purchase like a dying spider.Jake went to work. He was thrilled to finally meet a vampire he was allowed to kill.  I took the spaces around his teeth, gauging and ripping and tearing while the wolf pack cheered us on in Jacob’s mind. Sam paced the back alleyway, howling.James didn’t have any blood. The fluid inside our bodies was all venom, and it was burning Jacob’s mouth like bleach. When the body was little more than a chest, leg, and screaming head, I stepped back.“All you,” I told Jacob. He hardly needed the permission. James’ eyes went one last time toward Bella before Jacob ripped his head right off. It smacked into the wall, and there was silence. Everyone in the bond yelled their delight, howling into the woods at the edge of the reservation.I stared at the body. I didn’t have adrenaline rushing through me, but I did feel shaky.Can’t you enjoy this a little? Jacob asked me, spitting venom out of his mouth.“No time,” I said. “Sam! Alice!”Sam phased out and Jacob followed suit, unstrapping the running shorts from around his leg and pulling them on. Alice hopped through the broken window in front. The police cruiser’s trunk was open.“Gasoline,” she said, holding aloft a large red jug. “He must have been planning on burning the place down.”“Pour it,” I said, bending down over the twitching, leaking vampiric remains. “Jacob, get her out of here.”Jacob turned toward Bella, and all his victory dried up as he saw. I was not strong enough to look at her, not yet. Jacob took a deep breath – he thought Bella looked almost as bad as James did now. There was blood on her arms, on her chest. Her leg was sticking out at an odd angle and white dust covered her hair and skin.I tuned this out, gathering pieces of vampire and throwing them into the center of the room.“J-Jake–” Came Bella’s voice.“Shh, sweetie,” he whispered, picking her up as gently as he could. She jerked and gasped and started coughing as he lifted her. Definitely a broken leg, he thought cursorily. He looked at the large indent in the wall above where she was laying and the way she cradled her arm against her chest. Big, Bella-shaped hole in the dry wall. Probably more than a broken leg. “It’s gonna be okay.”Sam was trying to beat out some more of the bricks so Jacob could pass her through. “Jesus Christ,” he said, seeing her.“Watch her leg.” Jacob passed her over to him through the small opening, then climbed through himself. “So, those people on the highway definitely saw us...”“We’ll worry about that later,” Sam dismissed. “How are we getting her out of here?”“Charlie,” Bella said, her voice more lucid. “Where’s Charlie?”Alice threw me a lighter and exited to the alley. “He’s at work,” she said soothingly. “I can hear the police. We have to go.”Sirens were approaching from the west. I backed away from the pile of limbs and clicked the lighter. It all went up at once with a terrific whoosh. That was one more problem dealt with.Jacob and Sam moved to the opposite alley wall, away from the sudden heat. Something exploded and more glass shattered at the front. Flickering red tongues reached for us.Alice took my elbow. What’s the cover for this?“We’ll have to wing it,” I said. “Is her car here?”“Up the block. Keys in the ignition.”“Jacob,” I said, not turning to him. I focused on the flames. “Take Bella’s car and drive it back to Forks.”“We need to take her to the hospital,” Jacob argued. “Like, now.”“Sam,” I said intently. “We can’t let the police find that truck here.”Sam was overwrought and nauseated. The smoke was getting thicker, flames turning purpled deeper inside as James burned. “How do we explain what happened?”“We don’t. We stage an accident. Trust me – we don’t have much time. You don’t have to be a part of it if you leave now.”“Where’s Jasper?” Jacob asked.“Several blocks upwind,” I told him, getting impatient. I turned enough to look at Sam, and he nodded with resolve, handing Bella back to Jacob.Eyes open, Jacob thought, not saying anything.“Be careful,” Sam told Jacob, squeezing his fingers.You’ll have to look at her, Alice was thinking. We can’t take her to a hospital. Not here.I couldn’t. I wasn’t strong enough for that.“Hey, snap out of it,” Jacob said. “We need a hospital.”“Is she okay?” I asked. I could hear her heart beating, but I could also smell a lot of blood.“I think her leg is broken,” he said. “There’s an emergency room somewhere – by the water, I think – ““Her leg,” I repeated. “Anything else?”“I don’t know!” Jacob yelled. “That’s why we need a goddamn -!”He stopped, alarmed. Bella’s eyes were still open, but they had gone vacant.“Bella?!” He shook her. “Bella!”Now I turned, the logic centers of my brain shutting down one by one. Bella contorted in Jacob’s arms so suddenly he nearly dropped her entirely. Her arms twisted up, her back scorpioned like a gymnast. Jacob struggled to hold her.“Put her down,” I ordered. He laid her out on the concrete, where she fell still, breaths turning shallow.“What the fuck,” Jacob said uneasily. “Maybe I jostled her leg or something.”Alice, panicking, recanted her earlier thought. “Olympic Medical isn’t far,” she said. She ducked to cradle Bella’s head – something she had heard you were supposed to do for seizure victims. Jacob ran his hands over Bella’s body, checking for a break the way he had seen Emily do for Paul. None of us were doctors, and we had no idea what we were doing. For all the decades I had spent in Carlisle’s head, I could not think of a single thing that might be important. Except that this could be something we couldn’t see. A brain injury.“My hand,” Bella said, eyes closing. Jake leaned over her, saying her name. She blinked and briefly focused on him. “My…hand…” “Wait,” Jacob said. She’s not cradling the bleeding arm. “This arm is – ““My hand,” Bella screamed raggedly, startling me. We all flinched. Her body spasmed again, head digging into Alice’s hands. The broken leg jerked against the pavement like she wasn’t aware of the pain of it. “My hand is burning!”Jacob recovered first. He took Bella’s curled arm and wrenched it back from her chest. She screamed louder than I would have thought possible.“Stop, Jacob! Stop!” She sobbed. “Please!”I fell to my knees and knocked Jacob’s hand away, taking Bella’s arm for myself. This was not the arm with the seven-inch scrape that was spurting blood. This arm had only one mark on it – a pair of crescent moon indentations at the nape of her wrist.I stuck my nose close, inhaling deeply just to be certain. “Venom.”“He bit her?” Alice gasped.“No. No fucking way,” Jacob argued, leaning in to look for himself. Little need, the wound was clean enough for us all to see the perfect bite mark. Just a bit of blood was smudged around it – the venom had already sealed its entry point. It might have been the only part of her body that wasn’t bleeding.While we all stared at it, Bella dragged in a breath and sobbed.“She’s dying,” Jacob said, looking at Alice and me. “If he bit her, she’s gonna die!”“Edythe,” Alice whispered. Her panic was fading, turning to excitement instead. The bite was good news to her. “I’ve already seen it.”“No,” I replied.“What else is there?”“She’s dying,” Jake repeated. In case you forgot. “How long – how do we – ““Not dying.” Alice stared at the bite. “Changing.”“No,” I said, again. Alice pursed her lips, glancing up at me and then Jacob, hesitating at our matching expressions of grief. “Then you’ll have to suck the venom out.”The bite mark seemed to taunt me, James’ last revenge. I couldn’t allow this. I had to stop it.“Will that work?” Jacob asked. He looked at the color of my eyes – nearly as black with thirst as James’ had been – and recoiled. He was remembering with vivid clarity that Alice and I were vampires. “I’ll do it.”He tried to take Bella’s arm, but Alice slapped her hand over his wrist. “No!” She said. “Any more venom could kill you.”She was oddly sure of that, somehow. Jacob prepared to argue, brimming with rage, but  his wolf body had known to spit it out right away. It still burned his gums and tongue. He thought she might be right.“Then you do it,” he said to her. Alice’s eyes were bright gold.“I…” her eyes darted to Bella’s other arm. The one that had been scraping against the ground the whole time Bella seized. It had opened up even more, letting blood pour out over the concrete. It was as though she hadn’t noticed it until now – it pulled at her suddenly and sharply.“Stop fucking breathing, then!” I screamed at her. I didn’t have time for this.Alice clapped a hand over her nose and mouth. The smoke was a pillar in the sky, casting a shadow on us, and those police sirens were only getting closer.“It has to be me,” I decided.“Are you insane?” Jacob cried immediately. “You’ll kill her!”“I have to.”Bella’s moans cranked back up to screams. Her back arched as the venom began burning her again. She tried to pull her arm from me. Alice, holding her breath, ripped a long shred of fabric from her shirt and tied it above the gash on Bella’s other arm.Jacob was close to losing his form, vibrating violently at my side. He was going to stop me if I tried. He thought I was breaking the treaty – he was too scared to understand.“If I kill her,” I said, steeling myself for something I was unequivocally unprepared for. “You’ll need to kill me, and I’ll thank you. If I do nothing, she will turn.”Jacob hesitated, fighting despair and anger. To him, death and vampirism were really the same thing. I had made a compelling argument.Bella made another one for me. “Make it stop! Please!” She cried out. I turned toward her, running my eyes across her face. It was bruising already. Her eyes rolled, sightless. It was without a doubt the scariest thing any of us had seen, and we had each seen a lot.“I’m so sorry,” I whispered, stroking her cheek. “I love you. I’m sorry.”I looked at Jacob. He gritted his teeth and nodded.I was out of time to hesitate. I turned her wrist up and lowered my mouth to it.She screamed again, so hard that her voice gave out into a horrible rattle. I reached out with one hand and wrapped it around Jacob’s forearm, unsure exactly why but thinking it was a good idea. I felt him lean, pin Bella’s other arm to the ground to hold still as she thrashed.I stopped being aware of my surroundings after that. My eyes closed. It was just me and her blood. When I broke the skin, it slopped eagerly over my teeth, across my tongue in a warm torrent of ecstasy. The flavor that I had thought about for so long was marred unpleasantly with a spike of venom that wasn’t mine. I was jealous, territorial. I increased suction, trying to rid my blood of this intrusion. This was mine, all mine, and James did not belong.On another planet, someone tugged my arm. I would have turned and fought them off, but doing so would stop the flow of blood and I could not bear that. I leaned into it, feeling life flooding my own veins again. For the first time in so long I could be strong.“Edythe,” someone said. “Stop.”It was Jacob. I wanted to ignore it, but I had the sense that he was right. That I should stop. But that was impossible.“You’re taking too much,” Jacob said loudly. He flashed a mental image at me in neon lights. Bella had gone still. Her eyes were fluttering shut. I was attached to her wrist like a pond leech. A bloodsucker.The blood had run clear of venom, and I...I pulled away, unclenched my jaw, made sure to leave none of my own before letting Bella’s arm drop away from me. I pulled in a massive gasp of air, trying to clear my senses. Jacob pulled me hard into his chest, wrapping one arm around my shoulders and pinning me to him with all the strength of his human body.But I didn’t fight him. I held my breath and swallowed several times, trying to clear my palate of the taste as much as I was trying to savor it.“I did it,” I said when I could speak again. I wiped a hand over my mouth. It came away red and I did not lick my own skin clean. “I did it. Her blood is clean.”Jacob dropped me, pushed me to the side to get to Bella. “Bella, wake up,” he urged.Her eyes opened sluggishly, finding our faces and sticking. Thank God. She looked between all of us, stopping with her head tilted up to stare at Alice, who had stuck herself to the far wall.“He knew you,” she croaked. “He knew…”She passed out mid-sentence, head lolling to the side. Alice frowned.“Hospital,” Jacob reminded us. Her blood was clear of venom, but she had lost too much of it. Thanks to me. “Now.”I nodded. “We have to get her to Carlisle. Alice, call him.”“That’s too far!” Jacob said.“Do you want to carry her into a hospital?” I asked him sharply. “How would that look?”He shook his head and made to pick Bella up, but I put a hand on his. He was in pain, too – I had broken the bones of his hand and wrist the first time I batted him away from her. “I’ll carry her,” I said. “She’ll be fine. We need a distraction.”Tires screeched behind us, on the other side of the store.Jacob looked that way, eyes wide. Cops are here. Does Edythe want me to...?“Yes,” I breathed. “Please, Jacob.”He took one last look at Bella, who was now breathing evenly. I had earned his trust - for now. “Fine.” He agreed. “You owe me.”I allowed myself to smile as he ran to the end of the alleyway and phased. I had earned my own trust, too.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Part Three: The Nature of Daylight

“I must learn to be content with being happier than I deserve.”

Jane Austen, 1813.

_____________________
  Bella   The journey to consciousness was long and slow. I kept getting stuck in the burning – the pain and the meticulous pulling apart of my muscles. It held me down for what felt like hours at a time, then I would remember that it had stopped. And Edythe had been there glowing pink and white in the mist. When I remembered that, things were better. I started to feel my body again, in the present. There was still pain there, but it was nothing like what it was before. I heard voices I didn’t recognize. Once I heard Charlie, and my heart broke in half because James had trapped him and – and no, that wasn’t true, either. James had tricked me. Charlie was fine.Everything smelled like a hospital. I heard rhythmic beeping that must have been a monitor for something. I decided I wasn’t dead. There probably weren’t aches and pains in heaven, or wherever I would be sent.
“Port Angeles East commuters had a shock this morning as what witnesses called a pack of wild wolves ran straight through – “
“Can you believe this? They just aren’t supposed to get that big. I mean, what is going on with the wildlife around here?”“At least they’ve moved North,” said a different voice than the first. Something about this one was extremely appealing to me. I turned my head, seeking more of it. I felt detached from my body. Not painful at the moment, but numb. Like the pain was only being held at bay. Things faded into focus as I blinked my eyes open.A girl with pale red hair, so beautiful she could only exist in my imagination.“She’s awake,” the girl said. I realized with a nervous shock she was looking at me. I didn’t want her to. I didn’t feel like I looked my best.The television shut off, and the other person in the room sat on the edge of my bed, blocking her from my sight. I focused my eyes on him with some difficulty, unwilling to look away from the angel.“Dad?”Charlie clutched my hand with both of his, jostling the needle stuck into my inner elbow. The sensation knocked something loose in my head. I was alive. He was alive. Emotions hit me too fast for my heavy head to handle. I just started to cry.“No, no, none of that,” he said, pushing hair out of my face. “Does it hurt? Should I call a nurse?”“Dad,” I said, truly sobbing now. The monotone beeping from the machine sped up. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t m-mean to.”“Now don’t – ““I was a b-bad daughter.”He frowned, clearly at a loss. “What are you talking about?”“When I stayed with Mom. I stopped vis-visiting.”Charlie just looked confused. “Bells –”“And I wanted to m-make it better when I came here but I didn’t, I just made it worse because I’m selfish and I hurt people –”“Hey –”“I’m sorry.” I sat up and threw my arms around him. Well, one arm. It stung under the bandages. “I’m sorry, Dad, I didn’t mean to hurt you. I never apologized and I’m sorry.”Charlie hugged me back. “I don’t even know what you’re talking about, Bells,” he muttered after a while. “That was years ago. You wanted to live with your mom, what’s wrong with that?”I couldn’t speak after that.“I was so worried,” Charlie told me after I had cried on him for a long time. “When Carlisle called me – I thought you’d…”I realized, wiping my nose, I didn’t know what Charlie had been told. Edythe wasn’t in the room anymore.“I... I don’t really remember...” I said slowly.Charlie sniffed. “I never thought you’d be driving without a seatbelt, Bella. I swore I wouldn’t say this now, but what the hell is wrong with you?”I blinked. “What?”“The deer. The –” He looked me over. “You don’t remember anything?”“No,” I said, and it was the most honest lie I’d ever told. The numbness was starting to fade. My voice was hoarse and scratched at the inside of my dry throat. I refused to look down at my body – I felt plaster and worse things down there.Charlie took a breath. “You swerved around a deer. Ran straight into a tree, got thrown twenty feet through the windshield.”My mouth fell open. “Oh.”“You’re lucky Edythe was driving through our side of town. You could have bled out on the side of the road.”He started lecturing me, lovingly, on the merits of seat belt safety. How perfect a lie, I thought. Charlie was so concerned at his own failing, and my idiocy, that he wouldn’t doubt the truth of it. I held his hand, knowing this was the only way he knew to take care of me.“Alright,” he said a little bit after my eyes had glazed over. “You’ve had enough. We’ll talk about it later.""Okay," I said. It was getting harder to open my eyes after every blink. “I love you.”“I love you, too, Bells,” he said.I let my eyes slip closed. When I next opened them, though it only felt like a moment, it was dark outside my window. Edythe was back, sitting in a chair on the wall holding a coffee. She smiled at me, but something wasn’t alright with it.The monitor’s beeping sped up a bit, drawing Charlie’s attention. He was hovering at the door, phone to his ear. “I got to go, Phil, she just woke up.” He ended the call. “Hey, how are you feeling?”“Phil?” I asked. “Why are you calling Phil?”Charlie sighed. “Your mother’s on a flight.”“To where?” I blinked. “To here? Phil and – you told Mom?”“You were in the ER,” Charlie said, glancing at Edythe. “Of course I told your mother.” He sighed sharply. “I’ve got to make another call to the station. Edythe, will you look after her for me?”“Of course,” Edythe said. He disappeared down the hall, leaving the door ajar.The ambient hospital noises faded to silence as I looked at Edythe. Seeing her face again was something I had given up for lost in that dark room with James. She was very fresh-looking, not the bedraggled, dripping wet woman from my bedroom with bruises beneath her eyes. She wore a pair of dark leggings and a bomber jacket over a hoodie, her hair brushed and tied back in a ponytail.She set down her coffee and I realized I had been staring, silent, for way too long. I watched as she paced for a few moments in silent contemplation. “Did you kill him?” I asked.“Jacob did.” Her face was perfectly smooth.“Did he get hurt?”“You really don’t remember?”It made me sick to think about the needles in my arm, but I looked down anyway. My left arm had bandages over it and felt raw. The right – the one that had burned – had a brace over it, tight across my forearm and around my thumb. There was no burning now, thank God, but everything was starting to ache.“You have a broken leg,” she said quietly. “Twenty stitches in your arm. Two blood transfusions to replace what you lost.”Other than the burning, the rest of the pain and terror was like a black hole of memory. I recalled glimpses of Jacob’s face, and Edythe’s voice. They had argued.“All that, and he wasn’t even close to finished with you,” Edythe said.“I thought–” my voice broke. I breathed. “I thought he had Charlie.”Edythe’s lips parted. “Why?”“He told me he did.”“And you believed him?” She asked, her voice sharp.I nodded. An expression flitted across her face but quickly settled behind the blankness. “That makes sense, actually. I was wondering what he said to get you to martyr yourself.”“Trust me, I already feel like an idiot.”She came towards me, sitting carefully on the edge of my bed at my hip. “May I?”I would have said yes to anything she wanted. “Sure.”Edythe took my right arm and removed the brace quickly. Her fingers were cool against my skin as she pulled free the Velcro and snaps. The stiff fabric slid away and I looked down from her face for long enough to register what had been the source of all the pain.It was, unmistakably, a bite mark. But the coloring was wrong – it was a smooth and pale series of indentations instead of scabbing and stitches. I couldn’t believe that – I felt like my skin should be black and charred. This looked ten years healed.Edythe moved her thumb gently across the mark. “Do you remember this?”It was coming back in flashes, whether I wanted it to or not. “Where’s Jake?”“He’ll come back when he knows you’re awake.” She paused. “Charlie is very put out with him. He thinks your boyfriend should have been here with you the entire time.”She held my wrist between her hands. There was no escaping her gaze as my face flushed hot. “Jake’s not - I’ve told him a hundred times…”“Your father really doesn’t believe you,” she smiled. It didn’t reach her eyes, and I wanted to comfort her. I didn’t know how.“I’m so sorry,” I said, knowing it wasn’t enough.“No one blames you. He was smart.”He. The monster that neither of us could name. I shook my head. “I deserve some blame. Lots. Don’t let me off easy.”“You almost died. Nothing about that is easy.”I looked down at the scar again, the question bubbling up before I could stop it – “Would I have died? Or…?”Edythe stopped breathing, and I felt instantly stupid. Maybe Edythe didn’t want to answer that. Maybe I wouldn’t have died, and maybe that would be worse. Maybe it would be…inconvenient.“There is effectively no difference,” she suddenly hissed, pressing very lightly over the pulse in my wrist.  “Your heart wouldn’t be beating now. There would be no life in your veins. No warmth.”I didn’t understand her words, or the way she said them, and I didn’t quite understand the startled tears that sprang into my eyes. Disappointment, or grief, but I wasn’t sure for who. After a second of tense silence, Edythe sighed impatiently and pulled my face – so, so gently – to look at her. All the anger seemed to have faded completely, and she was quiet and attentive once more.“Are you in pain?”I shook my head. Edythe’s thumb caught the single tear as it fell down my cheek, wiping it contemplatively into my skin. I turned my face into the touch with a sob, because I was pathetic and sad and human and I liked her.Edythe leaned down and pressed her lips to mine.It was hardly more than a brush, but the heart monitor attached to me began screaming. Edythe pulled back to look at it, a smile teasing the edges of her mouth. I was mortified and elated.“Are your eyes purple?” I asked, noticing it in the same moment I voiced the question. Edythe’s eyes were still dark, and at first glance it was the same deep, amber brown of the past few days. But the dark circles beneath her eyes were gone, and maybe that was what drew my attention, what made her smiles seem so off. The color was wrong.Edythe didn’t look surprised. She only grimaced and said, “Contacts,” like that explained anything at all.“Why would you need–?”“Later.” She started re-fixing the brace to my wrist, so fast I couldn’t follow the movements. “Just know that I had no part in it.”“In what?”She smiled wryly and returned to her seat as Dr. Cullen threw the door open, Charlie just behind him.“Bella,” he said warmly, “I’m glad to see you awake. You gave us quite a scare.”His acting was impeccable. I awkwardly allowed him to go through some preliminary exams – lights in my eyes, discussion of a CT scan with a nurse who stood by the door and jotted his commands on a clipboard that Charlie kept peeking at.Carlisle’s eyes were more normal – a vague, honeyed brown that complimented his hair. “Any dizziness or nausea?”I was actually feeling extremely dizzy, thanks to Edythe. “Yes, both,” I told him.I was taken away – I didn’t even protest – for head and leg scans. It was horrible. They took forever and I desperately needed to shower and find clean clothes. I was in a hospital gown, with just my underwear and dirty socks on beneath as far as I could tell. My hair was coated with powdery residue from God-knows-where. I could smell myself, and knowing Edythe’s sense of smell was so much better than mine didn’t help. I didn’t want her close to me until I was clean again.Carlisle tried to keep me under observation for the night, but I practically begged him to let me go home. He hesitated, and I sensed I was close to cracking him when Charlie jumped to my defense.“What do I have to do, check on her every few hours?”Carlisle tapped his pen on his clipboard, then sighed. “Wake her every two hours. If you notice she can’t wake up or has trouble beyond what’s expected, bring her back in immediately.”Charlie listened intently to his instructions regarding my pain meds, and I noticed  Edythe, in the corner chair, also listening.“When is Mom landing?” I asked Charlie as a nurse wheeled me to the front doors. “Do you need to pick her up?”Charlie ignored me until we were in the cruiser – me behind bars, with my leg propped up on the back seat. Edythe had offered to drive us in her car, but I had declined. I needed to shower. “No,” he said. “Your friend offered to pick her up.”“Who?” I remembered Edythe’s warning. “Alice? Alice is getting Mom?”“What was I supposed to do, Bella? Leave you at the hospital alone?”“Well – Mom could have rented a car.”He just shook his head. I slumped back in the seat. Alice and my mother in a car for three hours. “So Phil’s flying out in the morning? Where are they going to stay?” I was sure there were hotels in Forks, I just didn’t know where. “They’ll have to sleep in my room.”“Nah, we’ll figure something out.”It was a nightmare getting from the car to the house. Charlie didn’t trust me on my crutches – which was probably fair – so he half-carried me by the arm inside and then up the stairs. “Be careful when you shower,” he told me, handing over the giant plastic sleeve I’d been given to cover my cast. “Maybe you could wait until Renée – ““I’ll be careful,” I promised him. “Where’s my cell phone?”Charlie checked his pockets. “I don’t – I have no idea. Maybe it’s still in the truck...”When he said that, I realized I had no idea where my car even was. I had left it in Port Angeles. “Where…is the truck?” I asked tentatively.“Towed it to the station lot, for now,” he said. I cringed. “I – I can go look at it, if you need your phone – ““No, it’s fine,” I said. “We can – worry about it tomorrow.”He hovered in my bedroom door for a few moments. I leaned on my crutch. I wanted to tell him I was sorry about the truck – about ruining his gift. But if I started, I knew I would cry again.“Are you hungry?” Charlie asked me, after clearing his throat.I really wasn’t, but I nodded.“I’ll go put something together,” he said, pulling my door closed. “Just be careful. The shower gets really slippery.”“I promise,” I said. He nodded and shut the door.I had enough time to exhale before my window snapped open and closed in the span of a second.“What happened to my truck?” I asked, shifting to look at Edythe.She looked as nervous as I felt. “Um…well, you hit a deer, then a tree, and the windshield…”“Who did it?”“Emmett,” she said, with heavy apology. I knew why – Emmett would not have held back. My truck was probably completely destroyed.“My phone?”“Emmett,” she repeated. “I didn’t think to ask him for it.”“Can I borrow yours?”She held it out without question, unlocked and sitting on a contact page for Jacob Black.“Mind reader,” I murmured, smiling at her as I took it and called him. He answered on the first ring.“Hello?”“Jake,” I breathed. “It’s me.”“Holy shit,” he said. “I thought you’d sleep for at least a day. We were gonna come by in the morning –”“I’m home now. I just wanted to – to call. See how everyone is.”“You’re home now? How are you home now? You’re in pieces.”Edythe flinched at that. I pressed the phone tighter to my cheek. “One piece. With some stitches.”“…sure,” he said. “Well, we’re all much better off than you.” There was a muffled ruckus away from the receiver. “Doing some – uh – tribal shit with the Council.”“So nobody got hurt?” I asked, sensing I was losing his focus. I was fine with that – he had earned a party.Jake laughed. “Not permanently. I just got shot.”I whipped my head around to Edythe, who was suddenly very interested in the scattered papers on my desk. “You got shot.”“One to the head, one to the back leg.”My hands were shaking. “You were shot. In the head. By who?”“The cops! Calm down. The Freak Twins pulled the bullets out right away. I’m totally fine.”“Who?”“Alice and Jasper. Seriously, I didn’t even get a cool scar from it.”“I’m sorry, Jake,” I said, turning away from Edythe again. “Really, really sorry.”“Well, you scared the fuck out of all of us, but we got our guy, so.”“I guess.” I smiled in spite of myself. “Um. Talk later?”“Definitely. Embry, shut up – “I handed Edythe her phone back, a million questions bubbling up that I held back by force of will. I was close to a breaking point. The hospital had put me in a pair of gray sweats that felt used. My skin was still caked in grime and sweat and God knew what else. I had just one more bone to pick.“You need to tell Alice what I told you about James – ““It can wait.” She stepped closer to me. “She’ll see it, anyway.”“No, really,” I said, drawing back. Edythe looked hurt. “I – I have to take a shower and deal with my mom.”Her eyes flicked to the hall. “You can’t get your cast wet.”“Thanks for the warning, Dr. Cullen. I won’t.” I shrugged Charlie’s coat off and got up on my good foot, hopping toward my closet. “I have a plastic thing.”“Is that safe? Showering on one foot?”“I’ll be fine.”“Bella...” She was right behind me. I turned and put out a hand to stop her approach. This time she really looked hurt, and I realized I needed to explain myself better.“I have never felt more disgusting than I do right now. I can’t think straight. Can I shower before we…”And I didn’t even know what I was trying to say. I made a complicated gesture with my hand.Edythe’s face cleared a little. “Bella, I want to help.”“Help how?”“I want to help you shower,” she said more clearly.I laughed involuntarily. “I don’t need help, really.”“If not me, then Alice can – ““No!”“Then your father – ““Absolutely not.”She stepped toward me more deliberately, hands on my shoulders to keep me from withdrawing again. I could tell by the set of her jaw that I was testing her patience.“If you get hurt again today, even through your own stubbornness, I will lose my mind. Please let me help.”My arguments dried up. It was too much. I was exhausted, and it was nice to think Edythe was that worried about me. Anyway, she was probably right about me managing to hurt myself again – I really didn’t want Charlie to have to collect me from the bottom of the tub if I did fall."Fine…You’ll have to keep your eyes shut,” I said.She nodded. “Of course.”“I–” I swallowed down a flash of nerves, needing her to understand. “I just don’t want this to be the first time you see me naked.”We stared at each other, both surprised and maybe a little embarrassed. Edythe nodded again and let go of my shoulders. My stomach was full of panicked butterflies.“I can carry you,” she said when I collected some clean clothes and creaked open my bedroom door, like she couldn’t help herself.“Charlie needs to hear me hop,” I whispered, listening. He was downstairs. He wouldn't care that Edythe was helping me, but he might have a few questions about how she got here without a car.She followed me into the bathroom, where I caught my own reflection.“Close them,” I whispered, waving to her face in panic. She obeyed instantly, clicking the door shut.I looked worse than I had dared to imagine. The exposed skin of my face was raw – flushed red beneath a layer of smeared sweat and grease. I had a flash memory of being thrown against a wall and it crumbling around me. My right cheekbone, which had been hurting since I woke up, was dark blue and swollen. My hair was a lost cause. Perhaps someone at the hospital had tried to clean me up, perhaps I had looked even worse before.I started with trying to pull the sweatshirt over my head. Reaching back pulled at the stitches in my arm. I hissed in pain, trying the other one. The brace made it impossible to grip anything. I almost knocked myself to the ground with the effort.“Bella,” Edythe said impatiently.“I can’t take this thing off,” I said, giving up. Eyes still closed, Edythe stepped forward and reached out to my collar. With one single touch, the fabric ripped in a line down the front. I gasped in surprise.Edythe turned to start the water, leaving me with my mouth hanging open. Shaking away the shock, I looked down at my underwear. There was no way for me to bend my knee to get them off. I looked around frantically.“What are you looking for?”“Are you peeking?”“I can hear your hair moving,” she said gently.I didn’t see how my humiliation could worsen. “I – can I borrow your hand?”Her eyebrows twitched together, but she held out her hand. I took it and guided it down to my hips. She froze, cocking her head to one side.“The fabric,” I clarified, mouth dry. Edythe turned her hand, index finger sliding along my hip. Goosebumps erupted along every inch of my body. With the slightest twitch of her fingers, the fabric snapped. Very politely, she did the same to the other side and didn’t acknowledge my pounding heart.“Thanks,” I breathed. She gave me space again, and I undid my bra on my own, grateful for front clasps. “I’m, um, ready.”She held out the plastic sleeve-thing. “You’ll have to keep your leg out. And the stitches. But they’re on the same side. Shouldn’t be too hard…this can come off – may I?”I nodded, which she evidently could hear. She trailed her fingers over my shoulder to my wrist, finding and undoing the brace. She set it on the sink, knowing exactly where it was without looking.She was very careful about how she touched me, probably to try and make me feel more at ease. I ended up standing on my right leg in the shower while she kept the plastic in place on my left leg with one hand under my thigh, the other holding my elbow where my bandaged arm was draped over her shoulder. Getting into that position took a while, as she kept asking permission before moving her hands anywhere new. It was a little maddening, and she touched me so carefully and lightly that I thought she might end up actually dropping me.The water was hot by the time I was beneath it. I bit back a moan of pure pleasure at the sheer relief. After a few moments I came back to myself. Water was misting, bouncing off my head and toward Edythe.“You’re getting all wet, sorry,” I said, trying to pull the shower curtain somewhat between us.She murmured that she didn't mind, and after watching her to make sure she wasn’t opening her eyes – I knew she wouldn’t, I was just so very naked – I let myself enjoy the water.“Can you, um, open this?” I held the body wash out. It was heavy, too difficult to open one-handed. Edythe had to fumble for the lid this time but managed to open it for me. When I pulled it back, she held on.“You’re bleeding,” she said decisively. “Where?”I looked at my arm stitches, still intact. “I’m not bleeding.”“Don’t lie,” she whispered tensely. “I smell blood.”“Yeah, I’m aware you do. But I’m not…” I felt my nose, looked at the bite mark. No blood. Then I looked down farther. I stuck my hand between my legs, fingers coming away pink. “Fuck.”“I’m opening my eyes – ““You better not!” I whisper-yelled, jerking the soap away and squeezing a glop onto my chest. She set her jaw. “It’s just my period. Great timing, huh?”She was quiet while I scrubbed myself down with a loofah. Everything felt just as bruised as it looked. The suds on my face came away a rusty color. I scrubbed until they turned white, even though tears of pain pricked in my eyes. I now recognized the very specific ache in my lower stomach as menstrual cramps, and I wasn’t even embarrassed. Just tired.“I’m sorry,” Edythe said after a while. “That was…impolite.”“What?”“I should be able to tell the…difference. But you had those transfusions and you smell different so I wasn’t sure if…” I stared at her. She looked mortified at what she'd just said, but it was hard to tell without seeing her eyes. “Sorry. It’s not something I have to think about anymore.”“It’s definitely something I wouldn’t miss,” I muttered, trying to lather shampoo into my hair with one hand. Edythe was a vampire. I shouldn’t be shocked that she could, well, tell the difference. But it was me, she said. I smelled different.“It’s much easier now than in my day,” she said.“What is?”“Menstruation.” Edythe shrugged. “We weren’t meant to talk about it. It was considered a sickness.”“Ew, really?” I tried to recall anything I knew about that part of history, wishing I’d paid more attention in school. 1918 was The Victorian Era. Or maybe it was Edwardian? “So you didn’t, I don’t know…throw yourselves down on chaise lounges and, like, take opiates and stuff for cramps?”The hand around my leg spasmed. Edythe inhaled deeply, lips pursed. “That’s very funny.”“Don’t laugh too hard.” I washed the soap from my hair. It was still a tangled mess, but forcing a brush through it might be easier now. “Can you reach my toothbrush from here?”“I’m afraid I would have to open my eyes to see.”“Never mind,” I sighed. “I’m done. Thank you.”She shut the water off, drops glistening in her hair as she moved. I squeezed the excess out of my own hair and wrapped the towel around myself. She let go of my leg right away.“You can open your eyes,” I said, as she helped me to the sink. There was a knock on the door that made me jump.“You okay in there?” Charlie called.I looked up and Edythe's reflection looked back at me. “Yeah,” I said loudly, perhaps too loudly. “I’m good.”“Need anything?”“No, thanks.”“Your mom just called. They’re on the way here. She wants to talk to you when you’re done in there.”What a conversation that would be. “Okay!” I said, very distracted. Edythe’s eyes moved over my face. They weren’t purple anymore, nor were they any various shade of brown I was used to. Currently, her irises were a startling, unnatural red. But then, nothing about Edythe was natural.“Woah.” I turned. “How did you do that?”Edythe blinked, and I felt myself start to blush. She looked fucking crazy good like this, actually. “The contacts dissolved. The venom does that.”It finally made sense - brown contacts over red eyes. “Venom…in your eyes?”She just looked uncomfortable. “You’re not upset?”“Upset?”“Yes. I…” She paused, looking lost. “It’s grotesque.”Trying to understand her, I found I remembered something else from that morning. It was so faint now, so dreamlike… “I made your eyes red?”“I told you, it’s all about my diet.”A faded memory of Edythe’s lips on my skin, and the burning. “How long will it last? The color?”“A few days,” she said, eyes narrowing. “You like it?”I bit my lip, trying to break myself free of the spell. “I mean, as long as it’s not some other girl’s blood you’ve been drinking …”Edythe raised her eyebrows and smiled widely, that crooked smile I had missed in the last week. “Sometimes, Bella, you frighten me.”______________________ Renée was immediately out of place in Charlie’s quiet house. I knew she had briefly chosen to live in this dark and silent part of the country, but it had always been very clear to me why she left. She liked the sun and freckles and wrap dresses and wine on the porch, so the comically large overcoat she'd obviously purchased at the airport looked wrong on her. Having her in Forks felt strange.She burst into tears the moment she saw me. I was viciously hugged, hanging onto her for dear life as Charlie helped Alice unpack Renée’s bags. “Oh, my baby!” She cried, her silver-streaked curls frizzing into my nose. “Bella, you’re on crutches!”“Mom!” I cried, struggling with balance. She caught me under the shoulder and dragged me into the kitchen, where I fell into a chair.“How did this happen, Bella?” She asked when she had wiped the tears from her face. “You yell at me for not wearing a seatbelt! You do remember how Phil’s uncle died, right? A deer! He’s going to have an earful for you, just you wait.”“I – I didn’t do it on purpose,” I said, though it was hard to defend myself when the cover story was so cut and dry. “I wasn’t…thinking.”She pulled my arms out, turning the left one over to look at my stitches. “You went through a windshield?” She pushed back my hair to look at my bruised cheek. I submitted to it. She used the same pumpkin hand lotion year-round, and right now the smell was so comforting I could have cried. It shocked me how much I had missed her. “What the hell, Bella?”The front door opened again. “Renée?” Alice called, coming into view with a bundle of blankets. “Where do you want the mattress?”“The what?” I asked.“Just roll it to the living room,” Renée directed. Alice nodded and disappeared into the foyer. “She just happened to have it in the car from a camping trip. How lucky is that?”“A mattress?” I hopped up and crutched to the living room, watching Charlie struggle inside with an enormous box. Alice hovered near him, waving her arms like she would try to catch the weight if he dropped it. The box depicted an inflatable mattress, king sized. “No,” I said, “We don’t need that, Alice. We have enough beds – ““No, we don’t, honey, Phil’s coming,” Renée said, picking up a corner of the sheets Alice had stacked on the couch. “Are these Crate and Barrel? So soft. Wow - they smell incredible!”“Do you need help with it?” Alice asked as Charlie set the box down.“No, no, I got it.” He smiled at her, winded. “Thanks a ton for this, Alice. You didn’t need to do all that.”“It’s the least I could do,” she said. “Is there anything else I can get you guys? Anything at all?”She was using the extra sweet, girlish voice she always used around adults. And my mom was completely smitten with it. I guessed Alice had put that three hours to use bamboozling her with charm.“No, we’re really set, Alice, thank you.” Renée dropped the blankets on the couch. “And tell your parents thank you for letting you drive all that way. And–” She laughed, gesturing at me, “– thank your sister for saving my daughter’s life today, while you’re at it!”Alice’s eyes – faintly amused – caught mine. “I will. Hey, Bella.”“Hey.”“You okay?” She asked, her voice trembling just a bit.“Yeah, I’m fine.” I shifted my weight. “Thanks.”“We’ll talk later,” she said, squeezing my hand. “Get some sleep.”Renée, in true Renée fashion, began showing herself around. Charlie had cleaned the house within an inch of itself waiting for her to arrive – pillows fluffed, floor swept, dishes cleaned. Me and him were naturally tidy, anyway, but the past week had put a strain on the both of us where house upkeep was concerned. Now it was all spotless for Renée’s inspection.Charlie followed her a little listlessly, hair combed and wearing a nice blue sweater I had never seen before. “You got a new heating unit,” Renée said, because for some reason she had opened the closet beneath the stairs and stuck her head in. “I still remember the old one. God, we froze to death in here. Ours in Jacksonville doesn’t even do heat and Phil refuses to get an HVAC.”I stared at my mom, appalled. But Charlie only laughed and pushed the door closed. “Smart man. Does it ever get below eighty down there?”Her voice turned tinny she passed into the kitchen. “It’s been below forty twice in the past few weeks. That never happened in Phoenix.”I listened to them talking until I started losing time between blinks. The next time I sat up, things had become very quiet in the kitchen. I heard Charlie and Renée talking in low tones – arguing, I thought. This made me so anxious so quickly I snapped to attention and leaned across the couch, straining to listen. When the landline rang I flinched so hard it felt like my leg broke all over again.“Hello?” Charlie said into the receiver while I rocked back and forth over my knee. “Hey, man. No, were just sitting around at the house.”“Billy,” my mom said decisively, joining me with a bright smile. “Do they not know that the world uses cell phones now?”“You didn’t need to fly here,” I told her, unsure of what the argument was about but trying to head it off at the pass. “I’m fine.”“You had to have blood transfusions, Bella.”I shuddered. Everyone was really enjoying restating my injuries to me. “What were you fighting about in the kitchen?”Her smile faltered. “Honey, we weren’t fighting.”I waited until she gave up. Renée always told me the truth. She sat next to me and sighed. “Well, it doesn’t seem like things are going well, does it? You, up here.”“What are you talking about?”She made sure Charlie was still on the phone before continuing. “You’ve been in the hospital twice, now. You’re driving without a seatbelt. These friends of yours – well, I don’t know them, do I?”“You literally just met Alice.”As if she had forgotten, she said, “Oh,” and then, “Well, Alice was just lovely.”“I’m not leaving.”“I wasn’t suggesting that,” Renée said, observing me. “I’m worried, baby, that’s my right.”“It was just a freak accident,” I said, wishing it really had been just that. I clutched at the brace over my hand, the scar that would never fade. “It’s my fault, not Dad’s. He’s – he’s taking good care of me.”She frowned at me. Charlie hung up the phone and idled over to us, setting a glass of water in front of me. “Billy. He wanted to check on you.”“Nice of him,” I muttered, sinking down into my cocoon of blankets.“You never told me about the Cullens,” Renée said, stroking my hair.“I did.”“Maybe, in passing.” She raised her eyebrows. “Alice talked about you the entire way here. You’re really close with the family, huh?”“I guess.”“And the sister – Edythe – just happened to be there when you crashed?”My heart stopped. “W-what do you mean?”“Well I bet the poor girl is traumatized. I’ll have to thank her.”“She was at the hospital all day,” Charlie noted. “Waiting for Bella to wake up. Really good kids, all of them.”I blushed silently beneath the blanket. How could he not put it together?“Anyway,” Renée said, picking up my pill bottles and reading the labels. “How bad was the hospital? They do X-rays?”“X-rays, MRI, CAT scans. You name it.”She set my oxys down. “Are you tired? Why don’t I take you up to your room?”I didn’t have the energy to argue, and after a painful climb upstairs I was able to – finally – collapse into my bed. It was awkward and uncomfortable – I had to lay flat on my back to avoid jostling my broken leg. But at that moment it was pure relief. Renée pulled my covers over me and sat to my side, taking in the room and my belongings.“Your father thinks I did a bad job teaching you how to drive,” she said.“He said that?” I asked, surprised.“Maybe not in those words…”“Well, you didn’t,” I muttered, tucking my arms into my chest for warmth. “I’m just an idiot, apparently.”“No one thinks that, sweetie.”I sighed. “How long do you think you’ll stay?”“Already tired of me, huh?”“Oh, stop.”“Maybe a day or two. Just to visit?”“Okay,” I murmured. “It’s good to see you.”“You, too, sweetie.” She smiled and touched my hair again. “So! I met Alice,” she said, a new tone in her voice. “When do I get to see Jacob?”I rolled my eyes. “Dad told you we’re dating, didn’t he?”“He might have mentioned it.”“Unbelievable,” I muttered. “Well, we’re not. Charlie’s delusional.”“Oh.” She sounded disappointed.“I’ve told him. I don’t think he gets it for some reason.”“Ah. Do you want me to talk to him about it?”I shook my head and tried not to look obvious. “I think it’ll straighten itself out eventually.”She continued scratching my head, lulling me back toward sleep. “Tell me more about this Edythe.”Edythe. She had left without kissing me again. “Um…she’s my lab partner.”“Charlie said she waited for you to wake up.”I tried not to smile. “Yeah.”“You’ll have to introduce me. To all your friends.”I would tell her about the bear, about Ben’s cousins, tomorrow. There was going to be a funeral, and it probably wasn’t the best time for a show and tell with my mother. I would have a difficult enough time explaining my injuries to everyone when they saw me.She could meet Edythe, though. I wouldn’t mind that too much.__________________I fell asleep again without realizing and opened my eyes into darkness. Renée was gone. Someone had left my bedroom door cracked and the hall light on, bleeding yellow across the floor and walls. The house was silent, sleeping.I turned my eyes to the shape by the window, swallowing thickly. I was too tired for even a spark of alarm or fear. I knew who it was.Edythe walked forward on silent feet, crouching next to my bed. “I just came to give you this,” she whispered, pulling the white cord from beneath my bed and plugging my cell phone into it. It buzzed and showed a dead charging screen. “Maybe wait and we can plant it back in the truck tomorrow morning? Pretend it’s been there the whole time? I just thought you might…I don’t know. Miss Instagram.”“Thank you,” I croaked. There was nothing I wanted to do less than look at my phone, all the messages I was sure were there. “I’m sorry.”“What are you sorry for?”I shrugged. “Do you want to stay? Just for a few minutes? I’m awake now.”She hesitated, but when I patted the empty space next to me, she stood and rounded the bed. I pulled back the sheets so she would have no choice but to climb beneath, settling next to me on her back.And just like that, I was wide awake. “Is my mom sleeping?” I asked in a whisper.Edythe’s nose – lit in yellow and blue, mostly shadow – turned toward the hall. “Yes. Now.”“Now? How long have you been here?”“A few hours,” she said. “It’s not okay, is it? I shouldn’t have done it.”“I don’t mind,” I said. I didn’t think I did, at all. “You should have woken me up. Or just gotten into bed.”Edythe turned to me, and her scent filled my head more than the pain meds I had taken. “I should have just gotten into your bed?” She asked sardonically.“Anytime,” I told her. Her eyes – and I couldn’t see their color right now but imagined them red and glittering – burned tracks across my face. The feeling in my chest was getting too big, too out of control, so I asked, “What do you think about my mom?”A pause. “I haven’t met her.”“What’s she thinking about? Does she seem happy?”“From what I heard…yes. She seems like a very happy person, actually. She thinks of you, your father, her husband, her cat. It’s all very…bouncy.”“She couldn’t have a cat before,” I said. “I’m too allergic.”“I didn’t know that,” Edythe said. “Two months feel like a lifetime to her.”I frowned. That wasn’t exactly the answer I wanted.“And what about Alice? Did you tell her?”“She’s adjusting, I suppose.” Edythe turned onto her side, rolling that much closer to me. “It’s a good thing, that she found out. Not worth the rest, but good. She’s never known where to start looking. She had no idea she was in an asylum.”“I can’t imagine.”“Nor can I,” Edythe said thoughtfully.I reached out beneath the blankets, finding the cold bar of steel that was her hand. She turned her palm to entwine our fingers. My heart leapt. On dangerous impulse, I pulled her hand to my stomach. My sweatshirt had ridden up, and her entire body went taut as she touched my bare skin. I thought it felt nice. She was the exact temperature of the cool side of the pillow.“Is this okay?” I asked when she didn’t unclench. Slowly, very slowly, she relaxed back into the mattress. I felt cool breath on my cheek.“More than okay. You’re incredibly warm.”I smiled as her hand moved to the bottom of my ribs, stroking the skin there. Stoking the flames of heat licking up my spine.“What are you thinking?” She whispered.“Nothing interesting, I promise.”“I don’t believe y – “I kissed her. She froze up again, hand stilling on my skin. Her mouth was soft against mine, and cool, without any salt to the taste of the skin there. I moved my lips slowly and deliberately, waiting her out. She had started this, I reminded myself, back in the hospital. Before.After a long, frightening beat, Edythe started kissing me back in halting movements. I was so done for it was scary – everything smelled like her and every point of contact between us sent waves of electricity straight to my brain. It was extremely frustrating to not be able to move, or even lay on my side. I wanted to do things. Things that would require the use of both knees.She must have felt the same way, because the kiss changed into something more desperate. She lifted herself on one elbow, hovering over me. Her hair tickled my face and there was a flash of cold tongue against my lower lip. At the same time, her hand skimmed down to the waistband of my shorts, pushing the fabric down to wrap her hand around my hip bone.My body didn’t seem to know what to do. My pulse became a living, writhing thing in my veins. I rocked my hips up, chasing her touch, and the movement sent a spasm of pain up my leg. At my sharp inhale, Edythe pulled back and removed her hand. I chased her lips, but she turned her head. That was just fine with me – I went for her neck. My tongue briefly met the skin there – it was sweet and soft and lovely – before Edythe gasped and put her hand to my chest, pushing me down to the mattress with bruising force.“Breathe,” she said, too loudly. I almost couldn’t. My body didn’t want air anymore, now that it had had her. But she started tugging my clothes back into place, and it slowly went through to my bedraggled brain that whatever had just happened was definitely not going to continue.  “My God, Bella, are you trying to kill me?” She asked, laying back down. She was back to whispering but sounded kind of pissed off.“Me?” I dragged in breath after breath. “What about you, with…with your…”“My what?” She asked. I struggled for words, unable to find any, because what had she actually done? Touched my hip? Kissed me with barely any tongue? In hindsight, none of it should have had me reacting like that. But it did.“I don’t know. I’m sorry.” I really didn’t intend on mauling her like that during what was technically our second kiss.She groaned. “Don’t apologize. God.”I didn’t answer, still trying to regain some control. After a while, she put her hand back over my hip. Even with two layers of fabric separating us, my heart started to race again. It was strange to me that she wanted to stop at all, but maybe I was being unreasonable. I chalked it up to being shocked she wanted to do anything to me at all. Especially when I looked like this.“This has been very good for my ego,” she murmured. “Should I go, so you can sleep?”“No,” I said, too quickly. “No, stay.”“Alright,” she said simply.“I’ll probably have nightmares,” I realized, suddenly dreading sleep. There’s no way I wouldn’t; everything that happened was stuck to my stomach like a bad fish dinner. Edythe and my mom offered great distractions, but they couldn’t follow me into unconsciousness. The pills had probably helped so far, but I wasn’t due my next dose until morning.“I’ll wake you,” she promised. It was more reassuring than I wanted to admit. “Sleep.”After a long cooldown period, with my face tucked against her shoulder, I started to doze. I shouldn't have been able to, with her so close, but it had been a long day, and at the edge of sleep I thought blearily that it had all been worth it, even the pain, if it meant I could have Edythe Cullen.________________________ Every few hours, Charlie came in to shake me awake and force feed me several ounces of water. When he left, Edythe would return from the ether to kiss me and make my heart explode anew. Finally, she stopped entertaining conversation or touch and shushed me when I tried, forcing me back to sleep.But she didn't leave.Phil arrived early the next morning, parking a rented Subaru next to the cruiser. Billy and Jacob came a little bit later with breakfast for everyone.The deluxe king-sized blow-up mattress Alice had provided sat pushed into the corner by the television, blankets thrown haphazardly into order. My two parents had not stayed under one roof in my entire remembered life. I watched Charlie’s face for signs of stress, but he only looked really tired. My mom acted like this all was completely normal, serving everyone coffee and asking after people she had once known, when she’d lived here. She got on with Billy like they had always been friends.Only Phil seemed not his usual self. He was much quieter than usual and fiddled with his coffee mug nervously. I asked him about his flight just to get him to talk.After everyone had eaten, the adults migrated outside to look at the rental car and I got Jacob alone in the kitchen.“You stink,” he said immediately, wrinkling his nose. “Congrats. She sleep here?”I blushed and shook off his question. “Where did you get shot?”He pointed to a spot just beneath his chin. “Here, I guess. But I was wolfed out, so technically it was, like, in my muzzle.”“Jesus.” I didn’t see any mark on his throat, so I pretended it probably hadn’t been that bad. “You killed a vampire.”He smiled, showing all his teeth. “Yeah, fucker had it coming.”I looked out the window, at Phil and Charlie popping the Subaru’s engine hood to peer at the machinery. “I guess it’s a nice car?”“Yeah, it’s a WRX,” Jacob said, like it was obvious. “So, did Edythe yell at you?”“Did she yell? No.”He eyed me warily, like I had seen Charlie doing. Like I was going to run off and break my other leg just for the hell of it. “You lied to us. That’s kind of fucked up.”There was no getting around it. I had lied. “I thought I was saving Charlie.”“I heard about that.” Jacob scrubbed a hand over his face. “Whatever, you’re alive so I don’t care. I’m just glad you’re…you.”His eyes flicked down to my covered wrist. I drew it to my chest. “What about you? You and Billy seem...?” I wasn’t sure what normal was with them, but there was no visible awkwardness.“Oh, uh. We...talked.”“So...do you have a brother or not?” I asked.Jake dropped his head into his hands with a groan. “Don’t even ask. I’m such an idiot.”“What?”“Embry doesn’t have a birthmark. He stuck himself with a fishhook when he was ten. It’s a scar.”“So ... he’s not ...”“Billy and I hashed it out. He, y’know, let me have it for even thinking he...” Jake shuddered. “We’re good.”I squeezed his arm. “Good for you, talking it out like adults. Maybe you could try that with Paul.”Jake looked up at me, eyes wide. “Oh, right! I haven’t even told you yet. Paul and I beat the fuck out of each other last week.”“You – why!”“Well.” Jake laughed. “It was the night Alice told us the bloodsucker was after you. I was stressed out, and Edythe had pissed me off. I went back to Emily’s and he was there so I just...very long story short, we’re good, too.”“I need more than that.”He snorted. “He thought I was with you. Ever since I brought you to the bonfire.”“You are joking.”“It’s not even funny. He’s lucky I didn’t beat on him a second time just for making my life hell for no reason.”I was just glad Edythe hadn’t thought the same thing. The mind reading probably helped with that. “I’m gonna tell Charlie, I think. About me.”“Whoa. That you’re vamp-sexual?”“No. Well, maybe. Eventually.”“Well, if you tell Charlie then it’ll get back to Billy and that’s gonna be a nightmare. Hope you’re prepared for it.” He shook his head. “Charlie loves the Cullens, though. You’re completely set.”I would have to ask Edythe first, and that was only in the future, if this thing had legs. I really hoped it did.I checked the time and sighed. Before I could do anything about Edythe, I had a funeral to go to.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Bella
Renée tried to go with us, when we explained. I absolutely forbade her. I was going to draw enough attention just by having ignored everyone’s texts for three days and showing up with a broken leg. My explanation for the broken leg was going to draw even more. I couldn’t add to that by bringing my long-absent-to-Forks mother along with me.“You’re taking this pretty hard,” Charlie said when he had gotten me into the police cruiser and we were driving to the church Angela’s dad worked at. “No one would mind if you stayed home, Bella.”I shook my head. I had gotten Ben’s cousins killed. The least I could do was drag my broken, bruised ass out of bed, throw on a black dress, and pay my respects. I stayed with Charlie as we joined the crowd milling into the Methodist church I had driven past but never really looked at. Several strangers gave me a double-take or two. Jessica screamed when she saw me.“Bella,” she said, still too loud, catching me in a hug. “Oh, my god. I texted you like twenty times. We heard you were in the hospital but I thought it was for the flu!”Angela drifted behind her, smiling at me but not attacking. “What on Earth happened, Bella? Hi, Chief Swan.”“Angela,” he said with an awkward nod. If I wasn’t holding onto his arm he probably would have begged off to talk to the deputies on the far right pews. “How’s the family?”She shrugged. “Not good.”“I got into a car accident,” I said, just to get it out of the way. Jessica gasped. “I’ll tell you about it later.”Angela nodded. “Ben will be so happy you came. But you should probably sit...?”I had been trying to hide how uncomfortable the crutches were. “Um...”“Just sit here,” Jessica urged, pointing to the pew closest that was still half empty. I nodded and Charlie helped me to sit. “We’ll stay with her, Chief Swan. I think Tammy was looking for you.”There were two closed caskets up on the stage, with flower-strewn, blown-up images of Austin and Dylan to either side. There was a feeling rising up in my chest about that. Absolute panic.“When did you get in a crash?” Jessica asked, sitting next to me and promptly taking a Sharpie from her purse. “Was it the ice?”“I hit a deer,” I said, watching her sign her name over my knee. I didn’t have the energy to stop her.Angela sat on my other side. Her eyes were puffy behind her glasses, and she turned a handkerchief over in her fingers. “I’m glad you’re okay. That’s terrible.”“Me?” I looked at where Charlie had gone to talk to the family, the ones sitting way up front. There was a brunette woman with an elegant chignon weeping on the shoulder of a tall bald man. Ben, with what looked to be his own parents, sat off to the side. “I made out just fine.”Angela sighed. “I’m trying not to crowd their family. I know I can’t do anything to help. It’s just so terrible.”She broke down, pressing the hankie over her eyes. Me and Jess squeezed her hand, our own tears not very far off._________________ Edythe  I had been to five funerals in my life, and they had all come after my death. The first was my own mother’s. I had been newborn to vampirism, red eyes hidden behind a veil, breath held still in my lungs. Charlie had impressed upon me the importance of controlling the thirst that now raged in my body. I understood that to breathe was to murder, so I spoke not a word to the priest that oversaw the empty ceremony. There was no one to mourn Elizabeth Mason but me. Carlisle had funded the venture.The second funeral was for a child. I was nothing more than a passerby on the street, but the thoughts of the grieving mother were so visceral, so horrific, I heard it from a mile away and followed. I wasn’t sure why. It felt grotesque to intrude on such sorrow, when that pain would never be my own. But I was living a grotesque sort of life. I didn’t know that mother would try to commit suicide a week later, or that Carlisle would find her of his own accord and save her life at her request. I didn’t know she would become like a second mother to me.In the dark years, I attended the funeral of one of my own victims. He was my usual fare – a rapist, a murderer, a gambler. But from a family with money and influence, who rented out Chicago’s largest cathedral for the ceremony of his passing. Even he had a mother, and I forced myself to endure her agony.I stood next to Rosalie as she watched her mother’s casket lowered into the ground, thirty-five years after Rosalie had disappeared from their lives.And today, I had attended the funeral of two young boys who had died for no reason, their bodies brutalized because someone had been bored and hungry. This was the worst of all five, but it had nothing to do with the dead, or with the living, or with the despairing mother.It was the worst because it had almost been Bella. I admitted that to myself – I didn’t care about them. I wished it had not happened, of course, but the truth of my feelings, of my vampire heart, was that I was glad it was them, and not her.She sat clutching her friends’ hands and crying with them. I watched from the back with my silent family, gargoyles with no place among the grief and loss. Jasper had not been able to even approach the building, and I envied him. His gift often made him feel alive in ways I could not.After, Carlisle took me to his office and sat me on the chaise longue by the fireplace. “I have questions,” he said. Would that make you feel better or worse?“Better, I guess.”He sat at his desk and pulled out one of his journals that bore my name. I know you successfully extracted the venom in time to halt the transition.I wanted to stop him right there.
You chose to stop, or Jacob Black forced you to?
Vampiric memory was an incredible thing, when you trained for it. Carlisle could recall almost everything he had ever seen or heard. This, I would have chosen to forget. Let it fade and vanish. But at the slightest mention of it, I was taken back to the moment her blood touched my tongue. The blood of the universe, of the lamb, and mine for the taking.“Both,” I said. There was no chance, in this world or the next, that I could have stopped myself from drinking Bella’s blood. There was no chance Jacob Black could have stopped me. He underestimated how vulnerable he was, how unsafe his trust in me, however limited, made him in that moment. It had to be a measure of both. “He was more scared than he realized. Close to losing control of his shape. I don’t know.”I remembered Alice’s quiet excitement – she saw the near future where Bella was a vampire. Perhaps that was what had brought me out of it. As if I would let her turn. From his venom.No. That decision wouldn’t be Alice’s, or James’. Or mine.
And you felt none of the nausea from before? You didn’t want to throw it up?
“I wanted to.” Then maybe my eyes wouldn’t be so frightening. Maybe I wouldn’t feel the best I had in decades, and know it was because I’d consumed her life. “But no. No nausea.”  Pen scratched against paper. Rain assaulted the windows, and the late afternoon sky was dark. It felt wrong to be so still and quiet after the chaos of the day before.And you ate today, without issue? Carlisle inquired.“Yes. Red Squirrel.” I grimaced. He smiled back, the picture of academia in his mahogany study. Squirrel wasn’t ideal, but winter was really setting in and there wasn’t much else nearby.Not surprising, he thought to himself. It was a mental block after all. Don’t know of any precedent for this. Henri, perhaps, but I wouldn’t bring it up around Yvette. Does she know?“Only a little,” I said, old memories drifting up. The fifties, in Paris. Henri and his human muse. He claimed to be so obsessed with her he couldn’t keep down any blood. His mate Yvette wasn't pleased about it.I wonder if Aro has ever seen such a thing… “Just a passing thought,” Carlisle assured me as I balked.“I know,” I whispered, thinking hard. “It’s been, what? Fifteen years?”
Thirteen since the last correspondence.
He watched me carefully, taking in the hard line of my shoulders and worried eyes. My red irises reminded him of the past, only now filled him with pride instead of disappointment.“Edythe,” Emmett called from downstairs. Come play with me. Jasper’s MIA.Carlisle waved me off, lost in thought.I sat next to Emmett on the carpet, hopping into the battle game with apathy.What do you have to be so sad about, hm? He asked with a mental nudge. I glanced over but said nothing. Sounded like your night was pretty good.“It was fine,” I said shortly, shooting down an opponent. “How was yours?”Don’t be shy now. He grinned and wagged his eyebrows. I drove my fist into his stomach, causing genuine pain.“Ow, fuck,” he gasped, rubbing the spot. “You’re strong!” Is that from her blood or her – The controller shattered to pieces in my hands. He laughed as I started punching wildly, even if it hurt. I was stronger than the rest right now, sure, but evidently not stronger than Emmett. I aimed for the groin, and even if it wouldn’t hurt more than anywhere else on his body, he instinctively protected it, getting me on my back and pinning my arms to my sides.“Let go,” I hissed, furious but unable to break his grip without destroying the floor. Esme loved the hardwood.“You started it,” he grunted, unused to having to fight anyone's strength. “Just admit it, and I’ll let you go.”“Emmett,” I said, “let’s take this outside.”I would actually enjoy it, too. Emmett saw that in my eyes, and he conceded the match for the half second it took us to get outside.
_____________________
 Bella  The funeral exhausted me beyond belief. I cried so much and so hard my head ached and my mouth was dry. I couldn’t even muster the energy to go upstairs and change, especially when Renée all but threw me down onto the camping mattress. She tossed the quilt over me and I stopped resisting. My abs ached and my leg ached and my eyes were puffy. Resting felt nice.She doled out my medications one by one, then laid down next to me with a sigh. Charlie had lingered after the funeral and was probably working – the police didn’t yet know that the monster was dead. Renée had sent Phil for Chinese takeout, and I wasn’t sure where he was going but it couldn’t have been much closer than Seattle.“Is this weird for you?” I asked. She closed her phone and set it on her chest. “Being back here.”“I haven’t had time to really consider it,” she admitted. “Maybe a little bit. Not as weird as you not wearing your seatbelt.”Even if that wasn’t quite true, I deserved it. “I fucked up, Mom,” I said.Renée rolled up onto an elbow, the whole mattress tipping toward the center as she did. She knew me well enough to hear something in my voice.“With Charlie,” I said. “With Dad.”“What do you mean, baby?”I didn’t know how to say it. “I came here to spend time with him, but so much has happened I just...I haven’t really done any of the things I wanted to do. I think I should stay here for Thanksgiving and Christmas.”That hour driving to Port Angeles had been incredibly long. I didn’t think I was capable of leaving Charlie alone for Christmas. Not after that.Renée raised her eyebrows. I expected her to throw a fit, but she just shrugged. “If that’s what you want.”“Are you sure?” I expected some kind of argument.“Honey,” she sighed. “I’m sure. Be with your father. You’re making him so happy, you know that?”“You think so?” I asked hopefully.“Of course you are. I know you’ve always made me happy, just by being around.” She smiled. “You’re doing a good thing, baby. I can tell Jacob and Billy like having you around, too. These men need a strong female to keep them in line.”I laughed, thinking that since I arrived, I had pretty much been doing the exact opposite.________________ Edythe  Late that night, I received a text message from an unknown number.Hey, it read. It’s Bella.It was the first time she had ever used my number. I immediately dropped everything I was doing. Emmett grinned knowingly and tried to look over my shoulder. Rosalie jerked him back.I didn’t think I had the nerves for small talk, so I just wrote, Can I see you?You want to? Bella replied, which was one of the more ridiculous questions I had ever heard posed. Then, she wrote, Yes. Now, please.I was there as quickly as my feet would carry me. The path was familiar now, as was the creak of the window, and there she was. She turned when she heard me, still wearing the black funeral dress. Her eyes were a brilliant opal in the lamplight. She smiled at me. “Hey,” she said softly. “That was fast, I’m not quite ready for you. Can you get my zipper?”I went to her in a daze. Downstairs, the television played Andy Griffith reruns while Renée and Phil whispered over a shared glass of whisky. Bella’s father had retired to his bedroom, working from a bare, wooden desk he had only ever used to clean his hunting rifles. Their minds, each thick with unrest in different ways, faded to background noise as I tugged Bella’s dress zipper down. It went to the small of her back, and the fabric was heavy with her scent. A dark bruise marred her shoulder blade. The bones and muscle there shifted as she pulled a white shirt over her head.“Just, don’t,” she said.I pulled my fingers back. “Don’t what?”“You know,” she fiddled beneath her shirt, removing a black bra. I didn’t know if I should look at it or not look at it. I just held out an arm so she could grab me for balance as she tugged on a pair of very short shorts. “The thing where you freak out because I got hurt.”Even as she said it, I had to glance at the stitches on her arm. I could see that she had been scratching. “I’m not freaking out,” I said. She looked disbelieving, which irked me. “I’m not.”“I thought, um…” she looked away bashfully. “You could stay here, again. To sleep. Or to watch me sleep, since you, uh, don’t seem too bored by that. Or maybe you can just hang out. For a while.”She looked at me. I nodded, speechless.“But you got all rained on, so maybe get your wet clothes off and make yourself at home while I brush my teeth and stuff?”If blushing was a possibility, I was sure I would be flushed from my head to my toes. “Sure.”She smiled again, widely. “I’ll be right back.”I sat at the edge of her bed, listening to her call goodnight to her mother and go into the restroom. Her mother was thinking about Jacob Black. I focused on that to calm myself.“I know she wants to be here for Charlie,” she said to Phil. “But I can’t believe she wouldn’t want to snap Jacob up. He’s adorable.”“Looks a little too old,” Phil said apprehensively. “I think Bella would just tell us, if that were the case. She never could keep secrets.”If not him, who? Her mother thought speculatively. Her mind flashed to Alice and the brothers she had mentioned. I sighed.The rain had soaked into my clothes, and I knew I was very cold. I hadn’t thought of that. I pulled my leggings and sweater off, wearing a t-shirt and borrowing a pair of shorts from the drawer Bella had left open. I hoped she wouldn’t mind, especially because once I realized they fit I decided to never give them back. I laid down, putting my head on her pillow and holding the duvet to my face, inhaling deeply. She said to make myself at home.Bella and her crutches returned smelling of toothpaste and soap, shutting the door and, after thinking, locking it. I tensed, ready to help her if she needed it, but by some miracle she made it to the bed without hurting herself. I was abruptly ravenous, and pulled her closer to me beneath the coverlet, sealing the distance between us with a kiss I no longer feared to steal. Bella kissed me back, mouth smiling against me.My hand fit perfectly against her hip. I was very interested in that part, where curved bone jutted out above a gloriously soft thigh. Nothing I would have recognized as appealing only a few months before.When she stopped breathing, I broke for space.“I’m so glad you came,” she said. Warm fingers smoothed up my arm, to the elbow and back. “I felt so fucking…alone today."“I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.”Her lips twitched, and then she was turning onto her side. Attempting to, anyway. She gasped as she jostled her hurt leg. The sound lanced through me like it was my own pain.“Bella.”“I’m fine,” she insisted, breathing deeply and shuffling closer, until her chest was pressed flush against mine. I tried to keep as still as possible as her hand smoothed up my bare leg. At her touch, my only instinct was to take, but I couldn’t do that. I had to be careful with her. Careful with myself, too, though that seemed like an afterthought. The road to safety diverged long ago. I was going to give her everything.“Was it terrible for you?” She asked me. “The funeral.”“I think it was terrible for everyone.”“The rest of us only have our own thoughts to deal with,” she reminded me quietly. “But I don’t want to talk about that anymore today. I just…” She looked up at me with the full force of her gaze, trapping me. “I really like you.”Bella Swan liked me. I hadn’t known, until recently, I was waiting my entire life to hear her say it.“I like you,” I told her. It was a half-truth, but a necessary one. If she knew the full extent of my feelings it might frighten her. It certainly frightened me.It was enough to make her smile, slow and wide. Her heart picked up its tempo. “When did you stop hating me?”“I never…” I stopped myself with chagrin. I wanted to say that I had never hated her, but that wasn’t quite true. “It’s hard to say. Maybe when you called me a “crazy bitch” on blood-typing day?”She giggled. “That made you like me more?”“The more we talked, the more I realized that no one’s ever been interesting to me the way you are.”“You were really mean to me that day,” she said. I looked away in embarrassment and guilt.“Don’t take it personally. I was determined to dislike you.”“Why?”“Because everyone was telling me I was going to end up liking you. Very much.”“Alice,” Bella said. She gasped quietly. “Oh! That’s why she – she didn’t see us being friends at all!”Tanya had also called the shot, but I wasn’t about to bring that up. “Yes. Keep in mind, I was already quite upset at you for blocking me out of your head.”“Do you think...” she bit her lip, something I no longer avoided fixating on. “Do you only like me because you can’t read my mind?”“That might be part of it,” I said. A very small part.She slid her tongue against her lips. “Or is it my blood?”“That doesn’t bother me anymore.” I could say that with certainty, at least.Bella lapsed into an infuriating silence. I tried not to be irritated, instead focusing on the rough pads of her fingers against my leg. I hated when she did this, when I could feel her thoughts spinning but she was quiet. Humans thought slower, I reminded myself as another long second passed. After the third, I really couldn’t take it.“What?”“What did it taste like? My blood.”I couldn’t read her thoughts. I had no time to prepare for a question like that. I didn’t have words for it, not to mention this was another truth I would prefer Bella not be frightened of.“You don’t have to answer,” she said with wide eyes. “I was just curious.”The flame inside me roared, clawing up the back of my throat and making my voice too hoarse. “Freesia. Rose.”She didn’t flinch or look disgusted with me. She frowned a bit, like I was making a joke at her expense. “I taste like flowers?”“Yes.” Her blood, her skin, her lips. The sound of her voice. It was all like flowers.The swelling of her cheek had gone down, but it was still discolored. It made her mauve flush lopsided. “Kiss me,” she said.I did, savoring the way her pupils dilated as I leaned in. Her breath caught and her hand moved to my back, pulling me closer. I appreciated how forward she was, even if I couldn’t find the same courage in myself. I wished I knew what to do, how to touch her. I tried to match the movement of my mouth to hers, even as her tongue pressed against the seam of my lips. Another step forward. This was okay, right? Tanya definitely did this with humans. I just had to be careful about my teeth.I couldn’t stop the low noise in my throat as I opened my mouth to her. It was an entirely new world of flavors and temperatures and scents. I catalogued it all in an instant, but with every wet movement thousands of new sensations assaulted me. Her lips were salty, and her tongue sweet when it met mine. Not in the same way that those flavors existed for a human, not really like freesia – just the closest comparison possible. I could have kissed her for hours, trying to make sense of it. Maybe I would start my own set of journals, filled with these observations, her name on the spine of every volume, Bella, Bella, Bella.With an irritated noise, she grabbed my hand and pulled it up, under the hem of her shirt, pushing until my thumb brushed against her firm, warm breast. I let it happen thoughtlessly, focused as I was on finding and memorizing the taste of every inch of her mouth. I felt the beat of her rapid pulse beneath my fingers, as well as the rise of millions of goosebumps. My hand must have been very cold, but she didn’t seem to notice. I let it drift up, hoping that it was okay to run my fingers lightly along the underside, then over the heavy swell of flesh. She moaned into my mouth. I was vaguely aware that this was escalating a little too quickly, but that sound set something loose.She moaned louder as I swept my thumb over her nipple, and that interested me, so I did it again. Her mouth stuttered against mine, and she made a high-pitched keening sound. I wanted to know what other sounds I could get her to make. At least she was remembering to breathe, this time.I pushed her hip, rolling her onto her back and leaning up on one elbow. Her hand wound into my hair, the other burning down my back and over the curve of my rear. It was a different kind of fire than the bloodthirst, but one that burned just as hot.And was just as capable of ending me.I should have given her – and myself – some space, but my mouth was pulled to her skin with magnetic force. I kissed my way across her jaw, feather-light, flicking my tongue out every now and then to get a taste. She gasped as I pressed my lips to the curve just below her jaw, exactly where the jugular vein met the posterior auricular. Almost against my better judgement, I opened my mouth and placed my tongue against the skin there. It was thin. I could hear and feel the rushing blood just beneath the surface. I could taste it. Bella squirmed beneath me, sending waves of warmth into the air.This was impossible. I wanted to lose myself in her, but there was no way to do that and maintain the level of focus required to thread a needle. One wrong move could be disastrous.“Don’t stop,” she whispered when I went still. I moved my tongue lightly, but my heart wasn’t in it. This was so, so dangerous. I could bite her, as easily as I was kissing her. I didn’t want to, but the fact that I was trusted so much unnerved me. Made me feel like she didn't really know what she was getting into.Her hand started to inch toward my lower stomach. I took it and pinned it to the pillow, panicked. Bella made a disappointed sound.“What?” She asked, eyes glazed over. I kissed her again in apology. I wanted her to touch me. Wherever, however she wanted. I wanted to be less scared of myself.Her lips moved with growing desperation. I dipped my tongue into her mouth again, reveling in the warmth of it. That’s when she stopped breathing.I broke it off, rolling onto my back and keeping one hand on her chest so she couldn’t follow. It had happened last night, too. Her heart rate slowed rapidly just before she forgot to breathe. I didn’t understand it, and realized with finality that I really would have to go to Tanya with questions. Ugh.“Did I do something wrong?” Bella asked after several moments of breathing. I turned to her, shocked.“Of course not.” You amaze me. You set me aflame. “I just have to be careful.”“What do you mean?” Her lower lip stuck out just slightly, pouting.“We can’t be reckless,” I said, hating myself. “If I forget myself, even for a second, you’ll get hurt. I could try to touch your cheek and end up shattering your jaw. You could move in the wrong way, and my teeth would go through your skin like paper.”She was quiet for five horrible seconds. I didn't know if she looked scared or sad. “So you’re saying we can’t ever…”“No, we can,” I assured her, with a hint of my own desperation. “It’s just harder than I thought.”She messed with the blankets, brow furrowed. “So it’s easier with another vampire?”“I imagine.”She cut her eyes to me. “You imagine?”“Okay, I know it is,” I admitted. “But not through firsthand experience.”“What?" Her eyes widened. "You mean you’ve never – ““Never.”Bella regarded me shrewdly. “Never in a hundred years? You haven’t slept with anybody?”“It never seemed important,” I told her honestly.“There was no one who you liked? Who liked you? I find that hard to believe.”“This is... all new to me,” I said. She groaned, falling back to her pillow.“That’s a lot of pressure.”“No pressure,” I corrected gently. “You’ve already exceeded my expectations, if that helps.”More quiet. I reveled in the feeling of her fingers drifting up and down my wrist, watching her watching the ceiling, clearly lost in thought. I ached to touch her again, but I didn’t trust either of us not to escalate. It was terrifying, how good I felt just knowing she wanted me.“You taste like candy,” she said, eyes wide.I love you, I thought.“You taste better,” I said instead, slipping away to switch off the lamp. Bella went back onto her side, wrapping herself around me as I returned to the bed.“Edythe?”Her eyes tried to find mine in the darkness, the color palette changed into lilac and teal. I liked the way she said my name. “Yes?”“What you said yesterday, about how turning and dying weren’t that different... Do you not see yourself as alive?”I stroked her cheek, letting the warmth wash over me. “No.”“Well, I disagree.”I smiled at that. “Explain.”“You have thoughts and feelings, like anyone else.”“I’m frozen in time,” I said quietly. “I don’t age, or get sick. I don’t bleed.”But she did. There was such a profound sadness to this love, one that I didn’t even want to think about. That was for later. Years would pass faster for me than for her, but they were years nonetheless.“Okay, maybe you aren’t human," Bella said. "I’ll give you that. But you’re not dead.”“I think you’re wrong."She shook her head. “You’re too hot to be dead.”“You have a way with words,” I said dryly, failing to suppress the bubble of absolute happiness in my chest. Bella breathed a laugh into my shoulder, saying nothing for a while. Her heart rate was starting to slow, but I knew she wasn’t asleep. Her eyelashes brushed my skin with each blink.I wondered if things would have gone differently if I could hear her thoughts. Would I find her as compelling? She would look the same as she did now, but would I have noticed? Without the allure of her blood, would I have looked at all?“Victoria,” Bella murmured.I opened my eyes, frowning.“Where is she?”I didn’t want to lie, but I also didn’t want to say that I didn’t know. That I had no idea about Victoria. She certainly wasn’t invested in hunting Bella, like her mate had been. But we'd killed him. I couldn’t be sure she wouldn’t come back. For me, for Jacob…James was dead. All she had left was revenge.“She killed Austin and Dylan. Or she was a part of it – ““She doesn’t want you,” I said firmly. I had only seen Victoria’s mind briefly, not nearly enough to understand, but I could read people. “She was weak. A pawn.”I listened to her breathe four, five, six breaths.“Is that why you’re mad at Alice?”“What?”“I don’t know. I texted her earlier, and she said you were mad at her.”“Did she say why?”“Of course not.”I didn’t plan on telling her anything when it came to this. Alice, in that alleyway, had urged me to do nothing, to allow the change to take place. She had, not for the first time, prioritized her own ideal future over the sanctity of Bella’s life. I didn’t like it.Immortality had been an option, for Bella. She seemed to be aware of that, but I was having trouble figuring out exactly how she felt. It was an entire can of worms I wasn’t ready for.“Fine, don’t tell me,” she huffed, nuzzling my shoulder and pulling the blankets higher.“Sorry I’m so cold.”“You’re fine,” she sighed. “Just fine.”“Good night,” I whispered into her hair. And it was. For the next few hours, at least, I wouldn't have to leave her side. “You don’t have to stay here. I know it’s boring – “I shushed her. “I’m staying. Go to sleep.”And she did, just this once, exactly what I said.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Bella
If Forks was cold in November, then late December was positively arctic. Like, the kind of cold that made me start doubting climate change. My hand was numbing fast as I stood on Jacob’s back porch with my phone to my ear. The other hand I’d pulled up my sleeve, holding it snug against my chest.“Six weeks doesn’t seem quite long enough, does it?” Renée’s voice was fretful enough to start stressing me out. “For a whole bone?“Doctor Cullen said everything’s good to go.” Not to mention that Edythe wouldn’t have let me get the cast taken off one second before I was completely healed. I frowned at the thick snowflakes piling at my feet and sticking to my clothes. I lifted my left leg and bent my knee because I could. “It feels healed.”She sighed heavily. “I’d just like to make it through the end of the year without you going back to the hospital.”“That’s a whole week away. Manage your expectations.”“I wouldn’t put it past you,” Renée said, stifling a giggle. “But let’s not jinx it. How’s Edythe doing?”“She’s having fun. I guess Alaska’s really pretty this time of year.”The lie came easily. The Cullens’ story was that they’d gone north to visit their relatives in Denali, like they did every Christmas. Relatives who were apparently real, and also vegetarian, but who no one seemed to want to talk much about – even Alice. All I got from anyone was that they were very old friends, which I could have surmised on my own.“Tell her I said Merry Christmas.” There was a muffled voice farther from the receiver. “Well, you talk, then.”“Hi, Phil!” I called a little louder, kicking some snow around.“Bella! How goes it up there?”“Cold.”“Well, we’ll be seeing you in March, right? Should be plenty warm down here by then.”“Yeah,” I nodded, feeling flickers of excitement already. It was my Christmas present from the both of them – two tickets to Jacksonville. Edythe was worried about going to such a sunny place, but she always worried. I knew it would be fine. Night walks on the beach were nice, too.“You’ll like the guest room – At least, you’d better. Your mother’s been bleeding me dry to decorate–” Renée said something shrill, and he laughed. “Alright, Bella, we’re gonna go see the lights because we have tickets and don’t want to be late.”     “Alright, I get it. Bye, sweetie!” Renée called. “We love you!”“Love you both.”This was my first Christmas away from her. It was strange not driving around downtown Phoenix and ogling the light displays and the tourists with Phil. Florida wouldn't be that different, I hoped. It would be balmy and humid, cold enough for a light jacket at the most.A quiet afternoon on the Quileute reservation was the exact opposite. With the snow drifting down from a thick cloud cover, just hints of deep orange sunset beyond, I felt like I was in a dream. A dream where everyone I loved was safe and would never get hurt again.There were new faces when I went back inside. I had heard them arrive in the front while I was talking. Jake hadn’t moved – I doubted he ever would again. He was still sprawled across the couch, hand over stomach and nearly comatose from eating so much. But Harry and Sue Clearwater had arrived, sitting at the small table with Billy and Charlie. Seth sat against the wall, next to an older girl, maybe my age. She looked just like Harry.I waved to Harry on the way to the couch, settling back in by Jacob’s feet. He pulled his legs back to give me more space, then dropped them over my lap. The weight was incongruent, but so was the warmth.“Hi, Bella,” Seth said cheerily. He looked tired in the same way Jacob did, from too much food. “I don’t think you’ve met Leah yet.”“I don’t think so.”Leah – his sister, from the resemblance – wrinkled her nose at Seth before looking at me. “Hi.”“The town witch,” Jacob muttered. Leah scowled.“Fuck off, Black.”“Leah,” their mom said sharply, cutting through the idle conversation. I saw Jacob’s smirk from the corner of my eye. “Language.”“I’m so sorry, Seth,” Leah apologized with exaggerated guilt. “I know you’ve never heard a swear word before.”“Don’t bring me into it,” he muttered. I tried my best not to smile – they reminded me of Edythe and Rosalie. When the adult conversation resumed, Leah slumped back and put her phone in her face.“She’s always like that,” Jacob explained to me. “Especially around Christmas. Did you get coal in your stocking, Lee Lee?”She didn’t grace him with a response, and I pinched the skin of his leg. I didn’t want Seth’s sister to hate me by association. Jacob raised an eyebrow, and I felt his antagonism shift to me.“Did you get anything good?”I gave him a hard look. “Can’t think of anything, no.”“Not even from…?” he trailed off suggestively. I blushed under Seth’s curious gaze.“No. I meant what I said.” The gift embargo that Edythe had been so upset about – as if I would accept anything more than what they’d all already done for me.I was still in utter disbelief, and it had only been a week.The first shock had been Jacob and Rosalie standing next to each other in my driveway with neither of their noses turned up in disgust. The second was my truck sitting there behind them.“I – I thought Charlie had it taken to a junkyard,” I’d said when I could speak. Edythe helped me across the icy pavement in place of crutches.Rosalie put a hand on the hood. “We hid it in our garage. What do you think?”It was all in one piece. One big uncrumpled piece. The hood and left door were silver now, instead of red, so it was patchwork, but it was the same car. My car. I’d resigned myself to allowing Edythe to drive me to school and Charlie to take me to the grocery store, so to be suddenly presented with my Thing was a happy kick to the chest. “You, too?” I asked Jacob.“I told your dad I’d look at it. I don’t think he ever expected to see it again, though.”“You–” I looked between them, finding it hard to close my mouth. “You did this together?”“I’m not saying he’s any more technically proficient than I am, but…” Rosalie tossed perfect blonde hair over one shoulder. I couldn’t for the life of me picture her working on a car. On this car, nonetheless. “I can respect that it’s his baby.”Jacob had started to look put off by my silence. He crossed his arms. “The silver was a rush job. The color you had won’t be in ‘till February. I didn’t think you’d mind.”After another long silence, Rosalie cocked her head. “I think she minds.”I floundered for something to say. Edythe’s thumb rubbed against my side comfortingly. I looked up at her. “How much?”Her eyes flicked over my face in a way that made me suspicious.“Nothing exorbitant,” Rosalie supplied. Edythe shot her a look that was almost grateful. “It was just a bucket of bolts in the first place – ““Hey!” Jacob growled.“I can’t pay you back,” I said, guilt creeping up. “I – I have some savings, and maybe Charlie can help – ““It’s a gift,” Edythe said, breath cool against my ear. “From all of us. And it cost a lot less than what you’re thinking.”I shook my head. “You don’t know what I’m thinking.”“Just accept it, Bella. God,” Jake had groaned. “We’re the ones who fucked it up in the first place. Let’s take it for a spin. C’mon.”I couldn’t care less about the silver, but whatever they had done had quieted the engine, so it purred now instead of roaring. I missed the noise.Charlie’s shock had been like a second gift. He essentially stormed over to Carlisle’s house to offer up the money for repairs, but Rosalie had insisted that working on cars was a passion project, and it had been easy with Jacob’s help. Cue more shock.Ultimately, it meant that I was in their debt forever. So I had told them all I would absolutely reject anything more. Even Christmas presents.“Well, I didn’t listen,” Jacob said, bringing me back to the moment.“What did you do?” I asked, frowning. He grinned and pulled his feet off of me, striding off toward his room without a word. I sighed and unzipped my coat. Being so close to him always made me sweaty.“Does your family usually come over here for Christmas?” I asked Seth and Leah, folding the coat over the arm of the couch. Seth was picking at the pecan pie. The radio on the counter played old-school, warbly Christmas music.“Yeah,” Seth answered. “Mom likes to go around to our friends and give out desserts.”“Oh,” I looked at the still-covered dishes with a pang of guilt. “I didn’t know. I made a cherry pie.”“Don’t worry about it,” Leah snarked. “She’s not a good cook.”Seth’s jaw went tight. He turned to her. “Do you have to ruin Christmas, too?”I shrank back instinctively, cutting my eyes between them and wishing I was anywhere else. I didn't know Seth that well, but the sudden anger seemed out of character. He immediately looked apologetic, but his sister’s expression turned to quiet fury.“I’m going home,” she announced loudly. Everyone looked up as she stormed out, and their mom seemed to crumple. To my infinite shock, Charlie put a hesitant hand to her shoulder. Harry just shook his head, looking down at the fishing catalogue he and Billy were poring over.“Sorry,” Seth said quietly.“It’s okay,” I assured him, tearing my eyes away from my dad. “Is she…?”He glanced over his shoulder before scooting a bit closer. “She’s really upset about the divorce.”Oh. I looked up. Charlie had pulled his hand back, but his chair was awfully close to Seth’s mom’s. Scandal!“I’m really sorry,” I told Seth, sitting up to lean in and match his quiet tone. A divorce would be hard any time, but especially so around the holidays. “I sort of know how that is.”Seth nodded. “I know. I guess I – “Something seemed to come over him. His eyes went wide, and he leaned back from me in a sharp movement. I sat up straighter at the shocked look on his face.“Are you okay?”“Yeah,” he said slowly. Whatever was wrong seemed to pass. He got to his feet, not meeting my eyes. “I think I’m just thirsty.”I watched him for a minute, confused. Jacob dropped himself down next to me, shifting the couch with his weight and not seeming to care where Leah went or why.I held my hand out. “Give it here, rulebreaker. It’s going right in the trash.”“Don’t get all high and mighty – it’s homemade.”The item he dropped into my hand was solid and smooth. I turned it over, examining the small, carved wooden cross hung on a long string of strip leather. Holding it up to the light revealed a surprising amount of detail. Little curlicues and borders like a gilded ornament.“You did not make this. Jacob!” I smoothed my finger against the varnish staining the red-tinted wood a dark, inviting color. “It’s beautiful.”He grinned widely. “You like it?”“Yes. Of course…I’m – I’m not really very into...um, religion...though...”“It’s for keeping with your garlic," he said.I turned it over again. Not a cross – a crucifix to ward off monsters. I couldn’t tell if Edythe would think it was funny or not. She could be weird when it came to Jacob, especially when he used me to get at her any little way he could. But it didn’t seem mean-spirited anymore. I thought they might even be friends someday, if they got over themselves.“Funny,” I said dryly. “But I do like it, thanks. I made you something, too.”His face lit up. “You did?”I leaned over to dig through my purse for the CD case with Jacob’s name written across it in sharpie. He sat up attentively, taking it with something like reverence.“Is this a mixtape?”“Yeah,” I wound the necklace through my fingers before tying it on. “I know it’s old fashioned. But you have that boombox in the garage. You can listen while you work on the you-know-whats.”I dropped into a whisper. Charlie hated motorcycles with a passion.“Bella, this rules,” Jake said emphatically, setting it carefully on the other arm of the couch. I sighed in relief, glad he seemed to like it. Edythe had liked the one I made her, I thought. She was difficult to read - she’d just gotten super quiet and beholden. It still wasn’t as good as a car, but oh well.“Did you get Paul anything?”He nodded. “You remember the –” he whispered, “ – bullet they pulled out of me?”I frowned. “Head or ass?”“Irrelevant. I hammered it down and made it into a necklace.”“Did he like it?”He nodded, a fond smile playing around his mouth. I pretended I didn’t see it, happy for him. Paul definitely hadn’t made the best of impressions on me, but in the past month it had become glaringly obvious how smitten Jacob was.“She made me a mixtape,” he told Seth when he returned, nibbling on a frosted cookie. Then he had to explain what a mixtape was. I sat back and listened. It was warm and homey there. The faint noise of an episode of Friends played on the little TV, and Billy’s laugh boomed across the space – exactly like Jacob’s, only more gravelly.It was so close to perfect – the only thing missing was an especially acerbic redhead. But Edythe couldn’t be here, for obvious reasons. Billy was still plenty upset with me for associating with her, even he only showed it if or when any of the Cullens were invoked. It was a tenuous peace.I wondered if there was any bickering going on at her house. From her texts, their Christmas seemed to be the same as a human one, just with a lot less eating. At least not any that Edythe would admit to. Maybe they drank deer blood out of wineglasses.Emmett had torn a young evergreen straight out of the ground and set it up in their living room. I helped decorate with Esme, who was the only one of the vampires who didn’t complain about the tree's smell. I spent a few hours marveling at their vintage (like, vintage) and highly breakable ornaments. Alice hadn’t been there to put the star on top, so Emmett had lifted Esme up instead.“Dude,” Jacob said sharply, lightly kicking Seth’s knee. “Why are you looking at her like that?”Seth looked between me and Jacob with wide eyes. “I’m not!” He cried.“Spit it out. You think she’s ugly?”I smacked his arm. Jacob’s tone was teasing, but the sudden stiffness to his shoulders was oddly defensive.“No!” Seth said quickly, flinching. “It’s just…maybe it’s your perfume or something. It – it smells weird!”Confused, I sniffed my sleeve. Jacob’s hand went tight around my shoulder, jerking me down into the cushions.“Ow!” I said.“Better get going,” Harry said louder, standing up from the kitchen table. It was abrupt, and he was looking at Jacob. I knew he’d heard what Seth just said. I just didn’t know why it was important.“You just got here!”Harry clapped a confused Charlie on the shoulder. “Just email me what you want me to order for the shop, and I’ll see what I can do. Come on, Seth. Gotta get to the Hardens’ house.”Seth bit his lip, getting to his feet and looking down at me. “Sorry.”“Don’t worry about it.” I smiled, waiting for the door to shut behind their backs to shrug out from under Jacob’s arm. Billy was sending me dark looks.“What just happened?” I whispered.Jake grimaced. “It’s not a good sign.”“Do I smell bad?”“I mean, yeah. Usually.” He laughed at my expression. “You hang around Edythe too much.”“But you’re the only one who notices that.” I smelled the fabric again but couldn’t find even a hint of Edythe. Every one of my friends having super-enhanced senses was going to give me a complex. Somebody always thought I stunk.“And Paul. And Quil and Embry.” He looked worried again.“But Seth isn’t – ““No. Not yet.”I shook my head. “No. It’s – everything is over. There are no vampires coming here, so why would Seth…?”Jacob shrugged.“He’s just a kid!”“So am I,” he said. He put his arm back around me. “I don’t wanna worry about it today.”“Jake.”“Bella.”I sighed in defeat, setting my head on his shoulder.Back at home, after a hot shower and a movie with Charlie, I sat at my desk and tried to organize the small pile on top of my laptop. There was the card from Mom that had made me tear up every time I read it, that came with a gift certificate for a store I’d never heard of. Probably definitely something in Jacksonville. I thought maybe there had been a small part of her that was hoping the University of Washington wouldn’t accept me, like she thought Florida was my second option. And maybe it would have been, but I did get accepted. It felt great, too, even if I was very behind. Angela and Jessica already knew where they were going to live, and I had yet to visit the city on my own.I’d given Edythe and Jacob their mix CDs – both loaded up with indie rock because Edythe liked it and because Jacob would like it if it killed him – so that seemed to be that. I asked about what to get Rosalie, for the car, but Edythe insisted on a firm nothing.Then there was Charlie’s gift. I felt bad even thinking it, but it was a shockingly good one. A Polaroid camera – one of the new models. I’d wanted one forever but couldn’t remember if I’d mentioned it to Charlie more than once. My present for him – a gift card to the diner and some expensive coffee beans with a grinder – had been a total guess. But even if he didn’t appear to know what a coffee grinder was, he seemed thrilled.We were doing better. Great, actually. My grand apology to him seemed less and less important as the days passed. The bear stuff had died down, and we were spending more time together. I had started to feel like I was catching up to all that lost time. We watched movies, cooked together, and I had even let him take me fishing a few times. It wasn’t that boring at all.I tore open a box of film and set it into the back of the camera, trying to avoid fingerprint smudges as best I could. I was proud of myself for not flinching when the window creaked open and shut.“That’s cute,” Edythe said, leaning over my shoulder. “We have some at home.”“Polaroids?” I pressed the button on the side until it turned green, following the instructions closely. “Like vintage ones?”“As vintage as I am,” she intoned, lips brushing my ear. I smiled, nearly distracted. The camera beeped its satisfaction with setup.“If I take a picture of you, will it show up?”“Original,” she said, pulling away. “Did you take all day to think that one up?”“Wouldn’t you like to know?” I swiveled around in my chair and stopped, planting my feet in surprise. Edythe was bundled up head to toe, with a woolen beanie low over her eyes and a large, black coat hanging almost down to her knees. And gloves. “What are you wearing?” I laughed out loud. “You look like me.”She rolled her eyes and pulled the hat off, sitting on the edge of the bed. “What’s the saying? ‘Baby it’s cold outside’?”“You don’t get cold!”“I do,” she said absently, eyes falling to my chest. The smile on her lips faded, and she reached out to tug my chair closer. I looked down, watching her balance the small cross on her palm. Her face was blank – only the slightest of creases between her eyebrows showed her hurt feelings.“Don’t tell me this works,” I said, pulling it away. “It’s not even gold.”She raised her yellow eyes to mine. “So Jacob can give you presents? Very culturally insensitive presents?”“You fixed my car!”“I didn’t,” she said smoothly, reaching into her coat pocket and producing an envelope. “Here. Merry Christmas.”I took it, gasping at the stamp. “U-Dub?”She nodded.“You didn’t–” I fought to keep my voice down. This was an acceptance letter, I was sure – it was the same weight that mine had been a few weeks back. “I didn’t even know you were applying!”“You didn’t bring it up. I didn’t know…”No, I hadn’t. How could I bring it up without sounding needy and clingy?“I – I was scared,” I admitted. “You’ve already been to college, I thought. I didn’t think you’d want to go again.”Her eyes softened. “I’ll be joining a master’s program, so it’s not like it’s a waste of time.”I narrowed my eyes, like we both didn’t know my heart was racing with joy. “A Master’s right out of high school?”“Paperwork can be fudged.”“That’s unethical,” I grinned, raising the camera and snapping. The flash reacted strangely against her skin, sending bright waves of light across the walls for a second. The camera started to churn and whir. I set it on the desk and climbed into her lap.“So you’re happy, then?” She asked, almost uncertain.“Yes,” I whispered, kissing her. When I pulled back, she still looked off. “What?”“Alice also got good news today.”“She got accepted, too?”Edythe smirked. “No. She has a job lined up. With the woman from the benefit back in October. Initially, she turned it down, but as soon as she saw us going to Seattle, she called her back.”“A job in Seattle? That’s amazing!”She heaved a sigh. “I was looking forward to a few decades away.”I was flipped onto my back in a dizzying movement, watching her shed her layers until she was in a t-shirt and underwear. I took in the sight eagerly, deciding to not remind her that some of us didn’t have decades to spare.“So you talked to her?” My eyes flicked guiltily to the bag full of hair and skin products I had no idea how to use. A gift from Alice, just before she and Jasper had left for Mississippi. She’d also taken my measurements, which was horrifying. I felt like she could do more damage with that knowledge than most people, and prom was starting to loom on the horizon. “How is she?”She pulled off the gloves and dropped them to the floor. I wondered again why she was so dressed up in the first place. “She’s good. The institution she was admitted to is long gone, but the records are still around. They had some trouble with an archivist, but she has names now.”“Of her family?”Edythe nodded, hooking her fingers under the waistband of my sweatpants, businesslike. I lifted my hips, excited beyond reason, but she just examined my knee. When her fingers brushed over my skin, I gasped. “You’re warm!”“I took a long, hot shower before coming over,” she said, stroking the outside of my thigh. “I wanted you to be comfortable.”“I’m always comfortable,” I protested, shivering at the implication.She looked at me for a minute, clearly wrestling with something. Knowing her, though, it could be anything from me to the price of eggs in China.“Should I turn the lights off?” She asked.I almost said yes. “That wouldn’t be fair, now would it?”She made a noncommittal sound, looking dejected.“Are you nervous?” I asked quietly. Her eyebrows drew together, like she was upset with me for pointing it out. As if to prove she wasn’t, she pulled her shirt over her head in one smooth motion. My mouth popped open.The past weeks hadn’t been boring, per se. There had been plenty of kissing and feeling each other up – and even that was better than it should have been. Waiting was good, because even after six weeks I still felt a little unprepared.She was perfect. Beyond. Pale red hair spilled down over runway-ready breasts and a toned stomach. She was very still as I stared, chest rising and falling imperceptibly. I felt myself start to panic. I couldn’t help, selfishly, but compare myself to her. I wasn’t as skinny, or as tall, or as absolutely ethereal. I had uneven proportions and stretch marks and I held weight in a much less flattering way. I was just human, and I wished I wasn’t.“Your turn,” she said eventually. I shook my head before I even realized what I was doing, and her eyes went wide with amusement. “Talk about fair!”“Turn off the lights,” I decided, even though it was stupid. She walked to the switch, making an unusual effort to move like a human, slowly instead of zipping all around. The lights going off didn’t take my vision away completely. I could still see her luminous skin where she stood, leaning against the wall and watching me. But I couldn’t see myself so well, and that helped. I sat up and pulled my sweatshirt off, cold air hardening my nipples. I tugged my underwear down and kicked them to the floor, wondering what my blush looked like in the darkness.She didn’t move for what felt like forever. I bit my lip and laid back with a sigh. This happened when she was overwhelmed, though usually after we’d started touching. She’d work it out, whatever was going through her head. I just hoped it was in my favor.I knew for a fact that guys liked my body. I was semi-experienced in that field. But Edythe wasn’t some guy, and everything was so different because of that.A quiet yelp escaped me when her hands wrapped under my knees, yanking me to the edge of the bed with my legs around her hips. Her face was shadowed, but I knew that her eyes would be all pupil in the dark. It was freaky, at first, but like everything else strange only made her more compelling.“I’ll never deserve you,” she whispered.I opened my mouth to tell her how ridiculous that was, but then her body was on top of mine. The feeling of coming together with nothing between us had me humming in pleasure. Her lips were as gentle as ever, but there was a hard line of tension in her as I smoothed my hands down to her lower back, finding the little dimples I loved so much.I wrapped my legs tighter, drawing her closer. Her tongue was warm, too. I wondered how she managed that. “Can I touch you?” I asked breathlessly, when I’d dragged myself out of the fog enough to remember how to speak.She licked my jaw. “You are.”“No,” I giggled. “Like this…”She always stopped me, when it came to this. It was something about her being scared to hurt me, or me hurting myself or whatever. It was hard to care most of the time. Especially right now. I reached between our bodies, touching the skin just below her bellybutton before she had my arm pinned to the mattress. Thwarted again.“Don’t,” she said seriously, face hidden in my throat.“The cast is off.”“Not – not that. Not tonight.”I held back a sigh, staying still until her tongue met my neck again. Some distant part of me felt bad for being so impatient, but when things were going it’s like my brain just turned off. Her otherworldly scent always made me feel drugged and content. Slowly, Edythe started moving her mouth down my chest. My breath hitched as she fondled one breast and latched her lips over the nipple. The sensation went straight to my groin, and I rolled my hips up towards hers, searching for purchase.Edythe made a weird noise, pulling away from me abruptly.“Come on,” I groaned. “It’s me, Edythe. Not a math exam.”Her mouth tilted up a little when I tapped my finger against her nose. “I don’t think I studied enough.”“Fine. If you don’t want – ““I want."“Then how can I make it easier?” I almost begged.She seemed to deliberate, ducking down to kiss my collarbone. “Can I go down on you?”I choked. That was kind of shocking. And unusually direct. I’d gotten used to her talking miles around anything sexual. “Y-yes. Who taught you how to talk like that?”She chuckled and slid, catlike, down to the floor. I forgot to be self-conscious, shocked and excited as I was. Goosebumps broke out all over as her lips moved across my inner thigh, and my hips twitched. Her voice was strained as she rested her forehead against my leg.“You need to stay still.”“Can’t,” I told her honestly. No use pretending. I could feel that I was embarrassingly wet, and my blood was on fire.“I’m serious, Bella.”“So am I.” I looked down, then away, face heating up. “You’ll have to hold me down. We both know you’re more than capable.”She laughed, and I knew she was laughing at me, but her breath hit the wet spot on my leg where her mouth had just been, and my train of thought crashed and burned. I needed her to get on with it before I lost my mind.“Here –” I shifted so my knees were over her shoulders, and pulled her hands to my hips. “That work for you?”She kissed my leg again, fingers sinking in. I dropped my head back to the mattress with a sigh, squirming against my new restraints just slightly.“Maybe this isn’t – ““Edythe, if this is how I die, just know I went happily.”“So be it,” she said with false martyrdom. Then there was a tongue against me and the witty response dried up in my throat.No one had ever done this to me before. Her mouth was colder than that part of my body, so that felt strange. But temperature was the last thing on my mind. Every swipe of her tongue drew a new sound from my throat. I hardly noticed I was doing it until she reached and covered my mouth with one hand.Her tongue flicked expertly. I saw stars. My body moved on its own, until not even her hand could keep me in place. I wound my fingers into her hair, arching my back and breathing hard through my nose. It wouldn’t set a good precedent if I passed out from lack of oxygen. She stayed on that spot once I reacted, making a repetitive motion that sent waves of electricity to my stomach.“Edythe,” I moaned, the sound muffled against her hand. She didn’t respond but to pull me closer to the edge of the bed with a sharp twitch of her fingers. It hurt in a way that excited me. “Edythe!”The orgasm hit fast and hard, much harder than I was expecting. I gasped, body seizing up against the onslaught of feeling. A rush of sound in my ears and a deep, almost painful throbbing where Edythe had slowed but not stopped, tongue dipping ever so slightly inside me. It lasted too long – not long enough. Eons and lightyears away from touching myself, that was for sure.After maybe a solid minute, when the noises in my throat went quiet and I was just fighting for air, she sat up. I felt cold and exposed.“Holy shit,” I breathed when she moved her hand. She climbed up my body to press her mouth to mine. I could taste myself on her lips, and I liked it. Her cool breath on my face felt good. She held herself over me, stroking through my hair and kissing me and looking as shell-shocked as I felt. I put my hands on her hips and tried to ground myself back in the real world, still trembling all over.“Live with me.”“What?” I asked, after a long moment of very slow thinking.“In Seattle, when we go.” She lifted one shoulder in a shrug. “Let’s live together.”I tried to pull my brain together to match her seriousness. She meant it.“Okay,” I said. She lit up in a rare, toothy smile. “Yes. Of course.”“You’re beautiful,” she murmured, stroking my cheek. “I want you like this every night.”Her smile dazzled my already precarious focus. Our lips locked again in a kiss that was almost rough, from her. I pushed a little, trying to flip us over, but she just settled her weight over me more firmly.“Let me,” I whispered, trying to lean up. Her hand tightened in my hair, holding me in place. I groaned. “I want to make you come like I just did.”“There’s time for that,” she said evenly, but the evasion was clear. “Can’t I just look at you?”I blushed, trying to turn my head. She didn’t let me. “For how long?”“Forever would be a start.”I ignored the fluttering anxiety in my chest. “Is that how long I have to wait for you to let me anywhere near you?” She started kissing her way down my chest again, drawing my knee up over her shoulder. “Don’t do it again!”She looked up, irritated. “Why not?”“It’s too good. I – I don’t know.”“Maybe I want to shut you up. This is by far the best method I've discovered.”I considered arguing, but if this was how she wanted to distract me, then fine. She could distract me all night, if she really wanted to. I wouldn’t stop trying.I took Edythe’s hand and put it back over my mouth. She grinned.Forever was just fine with me.