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March 12, 2017, the second and last day of the Wings Tour in Chile. It was mid-summer in South America and the city of Santiago, where Movistar Arena was located, was a semi-arid climate with high temperatures on the hottest days. The difference of weather conditions there was noticeable, the members felt it as long as they have arrived in the country.Each member has been affected in different ways. Some got a dry throat due to the air and some others had trouble sleeping due to the change of altitude and Yoongi seemed to get sleepy more often because of it. But Jungkook, in particular, his body seemed to react to the environmental change more intensely than others. The trouble was that, by a certain amount of pride and a little personal vanity, he hadn't mentioned his condition to anyone, not even to his closest companion, his constant and faithful pair. He kept his difficulties to himself, betting that he could do well, as always, not wanting his hyungs to be troubled because of him. This was their first world tour and the hyungs already have a lot to worry about, Jungkook did not want to burden them. Even though his mind has been constantly sending him signs of weariness, he simply shrugged it off and continued running through the choreography for the last time with the directors. Jungkook gave his best on the stage, there were only two days of the show and he never knew when they were going to come back so he told himself he needed to show his best performance and make good memories with the Armys. He managed to get through the first day of presentations, exhausted. On the next day, however, they have barely started when Jungkook realized that his performance had not been the same as always. Attentive to the signals that his body was giving him, he kept missing the timing of some moves. But the perfection he imposed on himself would require a very high price at the end of the night.They went to the backstage after I Need You, the coordi nonnas fixing their makeup that was smudged. There were still a few more minutes before the next song that would be Namjoon's solo, Reflection and then followed by Taehyung's solo, Stigma. The enormous screen in the stadium featuring videos from the album, kept the audience entertained while the members weren't on the stage.The rest of the group had noticed Jungkook's struggles during the last song and they were all worried. The fitness team came to take care of the maknae and also to check if there were any problems with the others. Namjoon, being the leader of BTS was trying his best to remain calm, knowing very well that he would have to decide whether or not Jungkook could return to the stage being in that state.“How's he doing? Is he fine?” Taehyung asked Namjoon for the thousandth time anxiously since he was told by the staff that he needed to keep away from Jungkook. It wasn't the first and it definitely wouldn't be the last time. After all, there was a backstage shoot as well. They would have to edit many parts away later...
Namjoon didn’t respond because he was paying attention to what was being informed to him through his earpiece. Jimin who sensed Taehyung's distress pulled him by his arms into a corner hidden away from the cameras. “Don’t worry. I'll keep an eye on him for you. If things get worse, I'll tell you.” Jimin assured and Taehyung who was affectionate by nature embraced his friend, thanking Jimin who understood his concerns and was willing to help him. They stayed in that position for a minute while Jimin stroked his back gently, trying to get his best friend to relax before Taehyung spoke, his voice trembling. "I've never seen Jungkookie like this ...""Taehyung-ssi, get ready!" They heard someone shout. "Go, do your best, don't worry about Jungkook I'm sure he will be fine. " Jimin said and Taehyung gave him a small smile in return, and made his way to the stage and but passed by Jungkook, Taehyung glanced at him and his legs automatically walked towards his direction but stopped midway when someone shouted once again asking him to hurry up and even though the screaming fans in front of him was a good distraction, all Taehyung could think of was Jungkook.As Namjoon and Taehyung were on stage, Jungkook sat down on the sofa, his whole-body going slump. He felt too warm and the room was stifling, the staff removed his shirt and placed ice packs on his neck and whimpered softly when he felt a hand massaging his sore shoulder. He was lucky that there were two more solos to go which gave him a little more time to recover.Seokjin's solo ends and everyone rejointed on the stage in the sequence of the line-up of the next song. Taehyung couldn’t take his eyes off Jungkook during the whole choreography and he was probably going to get scolded by his manager for not looking at the cameras. It hurt Taehyung a bit that Jungkook barely looked at him as he was too concentrated on not to slip up before the public. It all went smoothly: No More Dream, Boy in Luv, Danger, Run, War of Hormone ... Taehyung seemed to have his autopilot on. He was not the one who was dancing, at least he was not focusing on the dance moves in purpose like he usually does so that he could be in sync with other members, he was like an avatar in video games because he was following all of Jungkook´s movements. He could not feel his body dancing, nor his voice singing, since his soul was not in his body, but hugged to Jungkook´s body like it could protect him or support him, as if his stare could give him force, oxygen and strength.Blood, Sweat & Tears ended and they again had a short break, while the video You Never Walk Alone is aired before the Encore, which fans sang along to. Seokjin and Hoseok were also feeling the effects of the extreme heat, but they cooled off with ice water as they commented on what was happening with Jungkook.An assistant walked by them announcing they had only one and a half minutes left. Yoongi and Namjoon seemed to be the most concerned about the situation out of all members. The first one who was always colder than the second showed no dejection. Yoongi had noticed during Fire's choreography, that Jungkook had lost his cue in a moment of rising and had joined the group with a relative delay. It was only a small mistake but this had made him keep an eye on him for the rest of the performance.The team leader, seeing their break coming to an end approached Jungkook, who was being assisted with putting his clothes on for the next entrance.
"Seriously, Jungkook-ah, slow down ..." Namjoon said, eyeing the smaller before turning to the physiotherapist. "Is he okay?' He asked the doctor but before Namjoon could listen to his response, he was being ushered away by a staff.A thousand thoughts were running in Namjoon’s mind at the same time... Half of the show has already passed but the rest of the performances demands a lot of the energy which Jungkook's current state was deprived of. His situation could leave the other members emotionally shaken that they could lose their cues and mess up. There are only five minutes to go, probably four now. Although he had the power to veto Jungkook's entry, he knew it would ruin the performances sensibly, as well as ruin everyone's morale. The Armys would notice Jungkook’s absence and every fan in worldwide would know about it within half an hour. There are some clever Armys out there whose brain works too fast and they will figure out everything within a few minutes by analysing every movement they make.Jungkook stayed silent the whole time and continued to help himself to get ready, drank some more water to prevent himself from getting dehydrated; he thinks he already was, and headed for the area next to the backstage exit to the stage, where all other members had already been guided to by the staff. Namjoon accompanies him on his way. When the leader arrived, he reminded everyone not to go beyond the limit of their strength as it was his duty to keep every member healthy and safe as the leader. Taehyung could only see Jungkook when Namjoon moved away. He was hidden behind his tall figure the whole time, his head hung low and for a second, his hands instinctively reached out for him but stopped himself when he saw the camera pointed at his face at the corner of his eye. Damn it.They wrapped up the concert with Spring Day as the last song and Taehyung thought this song would never come. Though he wouldn’t admit it, he had wished the show to end sooner but it seemed to drag on and on. The exhaustion was clear in Jungkook’s eyes and gestures, he could hardly raise his arms straight and he wished he was the one being sick instead so that Jungkook wouldn’t have to suffer. The extra-long sweaters overlaying on their black T-shirts gave them a stripped-down look, matching the slow gesture of the music. But Jungkook's arms seemed to have no force whatsoever. At the end of the song, it was time to say farewell and they took turns to give a goodbye speech. For a moment, everyone forgot what happened to Jungkook. The adrenaline rushes they got from the show gave them an extra breath. Even Jungkook seemed to be more energetic as he nodded to the audience, which was probably why he had managed to get to the end of that performance still standing. A rain of choppy, colourful, metalized confetti descended all over the stadium, falling everywhere. At some point, Hoseok draped a flag of Chile which was thrown at his feet by the audience standing at the front over his shoulders and smiled brightly at the audience muttering a ‘Thank you’.Words like "Gracias" and "Thank You" resonated through the stadium as they retreating off the stage. Waving at Armys one last time who were begging them not to go. Staff was already positioned to snatch Jungkook into a reserved space to the locker room as long as Jungkook stepped foot in the backstage. Taehyung followed the group but could only stay at the next room, all he could do was to listen closely to what they were saying, trying to make out the situation by their voices.Jungkook laid on a mat placed on the floor and let the staff take care of him, too tired to care. Hoseok was allowed in the room to see the maknae who was now on the mattress. Jungkook was scarcely conscious but he knew he was being scrutinized by everyone's eyes; he also knew that Taehyung must be somewhere near, probably worried sick. He tried to distinguish the voices around him. He heard Namjoon asking him if he wants everyone to leave and he nodded slightly and the next thing he knew was Namjoon urging his comrades to go away so he can be attended properly.Jimin was the only one who escaped the monitoring of the hyungs and remained. After all, he had promised Taehyung that he would be his eyes and ears.Someone suggested to remove Jungkook’s socks, but he made a small negative sound at the back of his throat immediately, unable to move his lips. "Are your socks your pride?" The same person asked, amusement clear in his tone. Jimin laughed and Jungkook smiles with his eyes closed. Meanwhile, Taehyung was all alone, dismayed and angry at the same time. There wasn’t any sense in him being banned from checking up on Jungkook just because of a stupid film. They've known each other for four years. Several moments he had shared with Jungkook flashed through his mind like a film; meeting Jungkook’s eyes for the first time when he bumped into him after his vocal lesson; the boy who used too must hairspray, of what he thought about the youngest of the group, the time when they all shared the same tiny dormitory, the first surprise birthday for Jungkook, celebrated away from his family but among his new friends, his second family. Tears, smiles, giggles, games, fears, exhaustive training, Jungkook’s ambitions for exceeding in everything, his competitive side, personal discoveries, revelations, the many secrets exchanged between them only they know... They have experienced so much together and that included how their feeling evolved from mere friendship to something much more intimate. Staying there without knowing what was actually happening was simply torture. Being so close and so far at the same time. But Jimin’s there. He reminded himself. If anything bad happens, he will come tell me. After all, no news is good news.It was a few minutes later Taehyung heard footsteps approaching him and lifted his head and saw Jimin standing there leaning against the door frame. Taehyung didn’t have time to ask anything, because just behind him followed Jungkook, who went ahead of Jimin and straight towards him. No words were exchanged as they hugged each other as tightly as possible. Jungkook buried his face into the crook of his neck and inhaled deeply as if his scent was his oxygen. Jimin who was watching from the doorway walked away, having the feeling he was invading their moment and decided to give them privacy. A deep sigh escapes Taehyung’s chest as though he had been holding his breath all the time until now."Holy shit, Kookie, you are burning up, do you have a fever?" Taehyung leaned back and reached up to Jungkook forehead before touching his own, comparing the temperature.Jungkook looked too pale under the lights of the room. “No, it’s just hot after all the dances. I'm still a bit dizzy... I think I stood up too fast just now.” Jungkook muttered looking at anywhere but the boy in front of him. Taehyung wasn’t convinced by his answer. You only get dizzy for a few seconds when you stand up too quickly...Taehyung cupped Jungkook’s face in his hands and forced him to look at him in the eye. They have made the same exchanged glances numerous times and were both familiar with what Taehyung was doing. Jungkook suddenly pushed Taehyung away and brought his hand to his stomach. “Wait.” He stuttered taking two steps back from Taehyung away as he felt like he was about to throw up.Taehyung's eyes widen, and he got worried, watching Jungkook who kept moving away from the room. “Jun-Jungkook!” He stuttered kinda panicked and hurriedly chased after him. They were just a few steps out of the corridor when Jungkook jolted forward as he felt a lukewarm substance making its way up to his throat from his stomach. He tried to swallow it back down but it ended up on the floor. Jungkook’s body was still hunched and bent towards the ground. He gagged eyes watering and Taehyung called for help and the medical team rushed to them as they heard his shout. Taehyung grabbed a handful of tissue and wiped the corner of his mouth.Jungkook tried to straighten up his body but felt his knees bend, and he knew he was about to faint. Taehyung nearly got pulled down by Jungkook’s weight. Since when did he get so heavy? He redoubled the strength of his grip. The maknae turned to face him as if trying to tell him something but his legs gave out.Namjoon, Seokjin, and Hoseok joined the scene later. They were determined to ward off the desperate Taehyung from his partner, but Taehyung’s wild look said more than a thousand words. He had already been forced apart from Jungkook during the first call when everything had been filmed, but now... No one could get him out of here.Jungkook was lying on the same matters again where he had been treated just a few minutes ago, and the medical team was trying to revive him. The little space was too crowded for so many people so everyone was asked to wait outside. The frozen statue of Kim Taehyung didn’t move a muscle. He didn’t even bat an eyelash when Seijin-hyung asked him to leave. Jimin, who was allowed to stay approached Taehyung, both of them leaning against the table where Jimin was before, watching the others treating Jungkook.Taehyung saw the manager talking to Namjoon about the case. He exchanged a meaningful look with Jimin, the paramedics were talking to each other and he kept an ear open trying to listen to their conversation.‘…there one nearby?’ ‘His condition… worse.’‘…should take… better treatment.’ The head of the medical team then got up leaving the room along with the leader and the manager. Taehyung tried to follow them but was stopped by someone.“No, hyung, I need-” He said in an urgent manner, trying to walk past him."No, quiet." Yoongi warned holding Taehyung by his wrist and he tried to tuck his arm away but stopped struggling when he gave him a look.Yoongi was not a person of many words. One hardly argues with him since he is very incisive. Taehyung bit his lip and waited nervously for them to come back.It seemed that the three has reached a consensus about the issue and Taehyung saw the manager walked in now talking on the phone. Who is he calling?"We'll need to take Jungkook to a hospital. He needs special care and we can't do this here”, The leader approached the members and told everyone and they looked at him, expecting him to continue when Taehyung blurted out “But hyung, we are in Chile!” as if there wasn’t even one hospital in the whole country. Everyone looked at his direction but excused his thoughtless comment. "That had been arranged, Taehyung-ah. The company had done enough to prepare for emergencies like this.” Seokjin spoke softly, gesturing towards the sick boy on the floor.Taehyung gulped, swallowing the lump in his throat. The situation had left him helpless. Jimin who was staying close to him and put an arm over his friend's shoulder, giving a slight squeeze, to show that he’s there and that everything will work out just fine. Taehyung gave him a grateful look, thankful for his support.The hyungs have been thinking one step ahead.“But what about the media? The show is over but there's still a big crowd of fans out there, there are press, reporters, photographers ... how is it gonna work?” Hoseok asked, brows furrowed trying to figure out a solution."I saw the manager on his phone just now, was he calling an ambulance?" Seokjins’s face then morphed into horror. "Oh no! What if Armys sees the ambulance?”"Can you all please calm down, we always have an ambulance on duty for every show” Yoongi reminded them, they have never needed an ambulance during a show in the past so they forgot all about it.“We have to do it in the most secretive way as possible. The ambulance will leave from the exclusive access that’s out of reach for the fans and media. Unless some reporter decides to climb walls, we'll be able to move Jungkook to the hospital leaving by that exit.”Taehyung caught a glimpsed of the medical staff pushing the empty stretcher towards them “I want to go with him.” He spoke his thought aloud and Jimin gazed at Taehyung sympathetically, knowing the difficulty for him to get what he wanted.Jimin could read "trouble" stamped on Taehyung´s forehead. “Don’t frown like that, you will get wrinkles easily.” He joked and stood in silence before Jimin spoke up once again. “Talk to Yoongi-hyung. If there’s anyone who can help, it will be him.”Taehyung lit up a little bit with hope and nodded. The stretcher was brought to the room where Jungkook was and they lifted him onto it. Taehyung took this opportunity while everyone was busy to approach Yoongi explaining his situation."Please, Yoongi-hyung, help me please.” Taehyung supplicated with misty eyes, taking his silence as a no. Yoongi sighed, put his hand on Taehyung's shoulder, as if to say "I'll try" and joined the hyungs.“Who will go with him?” The paramedic asked.No doubt the manager would have to go due to legal procedures, also the interpreter, but one or two members of the group could also go too.
"Namjoon and Seokjin."Yoongi expression showed that he was taken aback by the manager’s decision, he didn’t expect that. He was prepared to give up his place to Taehyung if the manager picked him. As things didn't go as he expected, he can’t do anything but to speak up for his dongsaeng.“I think it would be more reasonable if Taehuyng goes instead of one of them. Shihyuk PD, all the hyungs, everyone knows the ... special friendship between the two of them. I know that the company is concerned about the group's image, about what the media might say or the fans opposing their relationship. But in an extreme case like today, I see no reason why he shouldn’t go. We’re like a family, and within a family, there will be some who are closer to each other, they share affinities, they’re like soulmates, they feel safe when they are around each other and that’s how Jungkook and Taehyung are. We already know that they’re inseparable, then why separate them now?”Those words caused silence, which Yoongi used to add. “When we’re in a foreign place, we tend to feel kind of helpless, displaced, half lost. I think everyone would have at least felt it once. Imagine Jungkook waking up in an unknown place, among strangers. Taehyung could give him a sense of security and comfort if we let him go with Jungkook."Yoongi knows how to state a case when he wants to. It seemed like he had saved his all words to specific occasions when he uses all his verbal energy at once. Taehyung who was right behind him, couldn’t help but get emotional after hearing his hyung’s words. Tears streamed down his face quietly."If you weren’t a musician, you would be a good lawyer." Said the PD, giving Yoongi a firm pat on the shoulder and he smiled discreetly, his gummy smile showing and the commentary eased the tension somewhat."Namjoon, you have already had stress enough for today. Yoongi can go in your place along with Taehuyng. But, Yoongi,” PD addressed the leader and then turned to Yoongi, “you have to make sure there will be no excesses. It's a responsibility.”Yoongi was satisfied with the outcome, all he did was speak from the bottom of his heart. He didn't expect his speech to be that convincing. The veracity of his words spoke louder than anything.
“You know, hyung, that was probably the longest sentence I have heard you say since I have met you from pre-debut days till now.”“Hoseok, shut the fuck up.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
When Jungkook was settled onto the stretcher, he was partially conscious. He opened his eyes and didn’t understand what was going on at all. The oxygen mask that was fixed to his face prevented the murmur he uttered from being audible. His gaze flitted over the faces circling him, looking for one in specific. One that would make him feel protected, that would bring him calmness. It was difficult to see since his vision was blurry, his eyes heavy, threatening to shut. The confusion began to frighten him, and he closed his eyes trying to block out the noise and it was then he felt a slight pressure on his hands, a familiar hand griping his, too familiar he didn’t have to open his eyes to identify whose it was. Somehow it brought him some serenity. Jungkook had no idea where he was going, but it was enough knowing he was there with him.The stretcher was placed into the ambulance and the paramedic double checked again if Jungkook was fastened properly before going off to the driver’s seat. Behind them followed another car in which the manager and some other staff were inside. The convoy then headed to the hospital the team had earlier phoned.Jungkook opened his eyes again trying to speak, but it only came out as slurred sentences that he couldn’t even understand himself so instead, he just moved his lips in a silent question that only Taehyung’s attentive eyes can perceive. “We are going to the hospital, don’t worry I am here.” Taehyung squeezed Jungkook’s hand tightly, giving the maknae a smile.Yoongi watched their whole exchange wordlessly. Out of all the hyungs, he was the one who tolerated the relationship between Taehyung and Jungkook the most, having hinted more than once to the members and also in his lyrics that he was in favor of the LGBT community and that he was open-minded to all human relationships. He had suffered enough in his life for being stressed by the differ of opinions and beliefs he had with his family and what the society expected. He paid a high price for insisting on following his dreams. It doesn’t take a genius to recognize the feelings the two maknaes have for each other are genuine.The hospital was close to the Arena so they were soon in the car park. But before the car doors could be opened, Taehyung was told that he was supposed to come out of the staff’s car but not the ambulance and he put up a fight with the camera crew, snapped at them saying no one would think he and Jungkook are dating just because he came out of the same ambulance where Jungkook was in. Couldn’t teammates care for each other? He doesn’t give two shits about how the movie comes out; his only concern was Jungkook.Jungkook stirred when he felt the car coming into a halt and tilted his head to where he heard Taehyung’s voice and knew by the tone of his that he was frustrated. They knew each other too well that by just one gesture, they could see each other’s motives behind it. He could hear the apprehension in Taehyung’s voice despite his efforts to conceal it.They hurried inside, careful not to attract any attention to themselves and not for a second had Taehyung let go of his grip on Jungkook’s hands but then they have reached the ward where only doctors and nurse were allowed unless visitors are permitted by doctors. “Let go, kid, we have to wait.” Yoongi’s spoke up from behind him and watched as Taehyung reluctantly released his grasp, staring blankly after the nurses pushing Jungkook further down the empty hallway.Taehyung watched as they disappeared around the corner and turned back round seeing the manager already talking to the doctors at the front desk signing forms and he turned to the hyung beside him, with an implicit request for letting them to approach and Yoongi gave in. The interpreter summarized the situation described by the manager, while a doctor asked questions and filling out a paper, Taehyung peeked at what he wrote and all he could see was messy scribbles. Can the doctor even read his own handwriting afterwards?The doctor left after a few more minutes of conversation and questioning. Taehyung sat down on a couch behind him and even though that wing of the hospital was a VIP care sector, a waiting room will still be a waiting room, lonely, and uncomfortable for those who were eagerly waiting for some feedback from the medical staff. Although Taehyung and Yoongi sat side by side, his thoughts took him a few feet away from the hyung. Questions arose and paraded insistently in his mind, fueled by anxiety and frustration. How will Jungkook be examined? Is he scared? Is it something more serious than I’m thinking? Can we just skip the whole waiting part so that I can know what happened to Jungkookie? Taehyung’s gaze landed on the clock on the wall, feeling as if the minute hand never moves an inch forever, his mind started to wander.Why didn’t Jungkook tell us he couldn’t handle it? Did he not trust us? Did he not trust me enough? His thoughts got more negative after another and he started blaming himself. I should have kept an eye on him or at least noticed it, what kind of friend am I ? His eyes started to brim with tears and Yoongi got up and left the room. Taehyung was too busy wallowing in his own misery to notice. “Hot chocolate?”Taehyung didn’t hear the door shutting, looking up and saw Yoongi standing in front of him. Muttering a small thanks, Taehyung grabbed the mug which was held in front of his face and took a small sip. He was about to add something when Yoongi’s phone rang, interrupting him. That unmistakable ringtone Yoongi had selected it when the group debuted in 2013, the strong beat of No More Dream’s opening chords hasn’t been changed since then. Yoongi took the phone from his pocket and looked at the caller ID before swiping to accept it. Taehyung tried to figure out who’s calling but he didn’t have much time for speculations, because his also rang soon after. Unlike his hyung, Taehyung had a fickle mind so he kept changing ringtones, resulting in him always not recognizing the tone but he had let this one stay longer since Jungkook choose it himself.. ‘Nothing could match us better now ...’ Taehyung remembered the exact moment when this had happened and the memory warmed his heart for few seconds. The initial chords of the melody “Am I Wrong?” insisted on playing and he left it ringing for a while before picking up.Taehyung heard Jimin’s voice once raised his phone close to his ear. “Taehyung, are you here?” Jimin spoke up and he hummed letting him know he is listening. “Are you guys back at the hotel yet?” Taehyung asked and heard a bit of shuffling at the background. “We are …How’s Jungkook?” Jimin asked hesitantly and Taehyung pursed his lips, he had little to say. For a moment, he wished that Jimin had gone with him instead, because they were confidants, and he would know how to comfort or distract him so time can pass by faster and Yoongi was not the ideal person to hug at a time like this, but he has his value in matters of security, steadfastness and support, even if it he seemed cold. The two calls ended almost at the same time. Yoongi told him it was Namjoon wanting to know some news. All the other members insisting they would be able to sleep only after they have conclusive news.It didn’t take long for the doctor in charge of care and the translator appear. At the arrival of the two, everyone who waited in the waiting room crowded around the doctor. As the doctor went on talking, the interpreter translated and explained that Jungkook’s case wasn’t serious, that it was a dehydration aggravated by fatigue and that salts and fluids should be delivered through his vein for a few hours, to be absorbed quickly, until he was normalized. Taehyung was relieved but not satisfied. He could only release the weight off his chest that kept him from breathing properly when he could see Jungkook in person just to make sure. The doctor later on added Jungkook will be moved to a room so they could see him if they wanted to, but that he would probably be asleep without waking up until tomorrow with the light amount of muscle relaxant they have injected into his body earlier. The staff told Taehyung that the scene of Jungkook being taken to the hospital will not be included in the upcoming movie like it was his fault before leaving for the hotel knowing they won’t be needed anytime soon and that left Yoongi and Taehyung and the manager, who was nowhere to be seen, probably contacting the company back in Korea or informing Jungkook's parents about their son. He just wanted they let him see Jungkook, talk to him, take his hand, even if he was asleep. And it seems there´s no goal Kim Taehyung wants in his life that he doesn´t get. * * * * *The room despite being plain white was plunged into a relaxing semidarkness. The first thing Taehyung’s eyes laid on was the maknae wearing a hospital gown on the bed next to the window, his upper body covered with a thick blanket, with a drip set inserted to his right arm, and a heart monitor attached to his left, the light beeping of the machine was the only source of sound in the room.The hospital have decorated the place for the VIP room in an attempt to have it look cozier, more un-hospital like by hanging drawings in the wall, placing a few couches at the side but nothing could hide the nauseating asepsis smell that prevailed in the air, reminding everyone where they were.“Sleeping like a baby.” Yoongi whispered, looking down at the boy in deep slumber and sat on the sofa at the corner trying to settle down to sleep, the schedule of the day had tired him out and he had no more energy left in his body.Taehyung was already immersed within the bubble that existed only to shelter him and Jungkook. Yoongi laid on the sofa and sent some text messages to Namjoon and to the rest of the group, while Taehyung remained in his silent worship.Wanting to settle close to the bed, Taehyung grabbed the chair next to the bedside table. The movement didn’t escape Yoongi’s eyes, “That chair doesn’t look too comfortable...” He commented but as if Taehyung would care about it, he had already positioned the chair beside the bed, so that he could hold Jungkook’s hand. Yoongi even tried a playful comment about how he will end up altering the maknae’s heart rate but gave up talking about anything future when he realized, more than ever that for Taehyung, there were only two people in that room, and none of them was named Min Yoongi. The tiredness and the darkness also began to join with all the emotions experienced at the end of that night and Yoongi was carried away by sleep.In the air, only the noise of the medical system and the light snoring of Yoongi were witnesses to the collapse of Taehyung’s tears. His deep voice came from the bottom of his soul, but it was only a whisper “I’ll stay here ... until you wake up ...”Taehyung’s heart skipped a beat staring at the peaceful face of his companion and diverted his gaze down to Jungkook’s parted lips jutted out slightly into a tiny pout, the way they stay whenever he falls asleep. He turned back in Yoongi’s direction, to make sure the hyung was asleep before getting up from his chair, approaching the head of the bed and inched towards the maknae’s face hesitantly. He brought his lips closer to Jungkook’s and leaned in but didn’t pull away instantly. He stayed there, forehead against his mate’s and a lump came into his throat. He took a deep shuddering breath, shakily whispered Jungkook’s name, and placed a gentle kiss on his forehead. Trying to compose his emotions, he returned to sit down. He was exhausted just like the snoring hyung, he also began to feel the weight of everything that had happened so far, and his eyes fought with the drowsiness heavy on his eyelids. He began humming the first lines of “Save me” to keep himself awake and sang lowly like how he usually did, before they have just moved to their first dorm when Jungkook slipped into his bed in the middle of the night mumbling that he can’t sleep and missed his family back in Busan, miles away from Seoul. Taehyung would let him stay and snuggle together in the too small but comfortable enough bed, humming a random tune to put the boy to sleep. He hasn’t sung to him like this for such a long time...“Listen to my heartbeat, It calls you whenever it wants to.”.He stared out of the window, the darkness and the deserted streets only increased his sense of loneliness. He held Jungkook’s hand and gazed at it in the smallest details, as he had done countless times before, always seeking for something that would catch his attention. Tracing the veins from the back of Jungkook's hand and up his arm, Taehyung began to speak, voice hushed as if talking to a baby. “Kook-ah, are you so stubborn? You should have told me... I have never felt so anxious like today. Everyone is worried.” He recalled the frowning faces of the members during the concert at the backstage.“You could have just told us you weren’t feeling well, couldn’t you? You don’t always need to be perfect, hyung loves you the same way.” He brushed Jungkook’s hair out of his face and dabbed his lips on the back of Jungkook’s hand humming “All of me”, a song by John Legend that the two of them had sung together once. The memory playing in his mind.“What would I do without your smart mouth
Drawing me in and you kicking me out
Got my head spinning, no kidding...
I can’t pin you down
What’s going on in that beautiful mind
I’m on your magical mystery ride
And I’m so dizzy ... don’t know what hit me
But I’ll be all right-He halted mid-sentence, “No, I’m not alright .”The sight of Jungkook breathing softly, head lolled to the side made the corners of Taehyung’s lips tugged up slightly remembering the smile on that face, his shy side, of how difficult it had been for him at first to break the maknae out of his shell. “Cause all of me
Loves all of you
Love your curves and all your edges
All your perfect imperfections
Give your all to me...
I’ll give my all to you...
You’re my end and my beginning
Even when I lose I’m winning
‘Cause I give you all of me
And you give me-”Taehyung cringed when he was interrupted by a loud snore. Yoongi was sleeping soundly with his arms locked in the middle of his legs and Tae laughed at the ridiculously uncomfortable position, he’d rather sleep hugging somebody... or something. He drew the chair closer to the bed so he could lean his head against the mattress and continue to hold Jungkook’s hand. The room felt colder than before when he came in, Taehyung made sure Jungkook was well covered. Although it was summer, even with the air on, it wasn’t uncomfortably cold. His gesture was more a sign of care than anything else. That special care he had for the maknae since he first met him, so introverted that he could barely communicated well with people, but with such potential as a rough diamond.Taehyung had no idea what the time was, it felt like he had stayed there for hours and his eyes started to weigh, but he didn’t want to close his eyes, he wanted to be the first thing Jungkook sees when he finally wakes up. Every minute beside him, with no interference was precious to him. He remembers a song* about being with someone from dusk to dawn just like he was now. He thought about singing this song with Jungkook someday or making a cover for ARMY.“Not tryna be indie
Not tryna be cool
Just tryna be in this
Tell me, are you too?
Can you feel where the wind is?
Can you feel it through
All of the windows
Inside this room?
‘Cause I wanna touch you baby
And I wanna feel you tooI wanna see the sunrise
On your sins just me and you
Light it up, on the run
Let’s make love tonight
Make it up, fall in love, try
But you’ll never be alone
I’ll be with you from dusk till dawn
I’ll be with you from dusk till dawn
Baby, I am right here
I’ll hold you when things go wrong
I’ll be with you from dusk till dawn
I’ll be with you from dusk till dawn
Baby, I am right here...”Tae couldn’t sing the last verses of the song, because he soon fell asleep.
_______________________________________________________________________________________(*) Poetic license, because this song was only released in the same year, after the events here punctuated, that's in September 2017.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The nurse came in to check the serum and made some notes about on Jungkook's medical card. She expected them to be awake but the three of them were sleeping like a log, keeping her movements around the room as quiet as possible, she looked at the two; on the bed and the other close to him, their hands intertwined with each other's.I wish I have a friend like that too. She observed the two for a few more moments before leaving to attend other patients.The sun had already risen and Jungkook would normally sleep until someone woke him up but today, as soon as he heard the click of the the door being closed, he began to wake up, the constant beeping wasn't helping much with his sleep either.Jungkook opened his eyes slowly, squinting against the sunlight shining right into his face. Laying there looking up at the white celling, the memories of last night's events flooded back to him. He tried to raise his hands to block the bright light but something weighed his hands down so he looked to his side and saw Taehyung sleeping next to him with his head rested on their hands, a little pout on his lips.Jungkook slipped his hand away and winced when he felt it going numb. He then played with a strand of Taehyung's hair with the intention of waking him up but he moved away from his touch unconsciously so he place his hand at the side of his face tapping lightly.
Taehyung wasn’t a deep sleeper so it was easy to wake him up. The cold touch of the monitoring clip attached to one of JK's fingers also helped to wake him. Taehyung's eyes fluttered open then shut them again letting out a small yawn and Jungkook took his time to contemplate the face he adored so much."Taehyungie...wake up." Jungkook murmured, tugging lightly at his hair. Taehyung opened his eyes instantly when he heard his voice and looked up to see Jungkook smiling down at him."Gud- good morning." Taehyung came out weirdly hoarse and cleared his dry throat.
"Good morning to you too." Jungkook replied watching his hyung rubbed his sleepy eyes. Why is he always so cute?"Did you guys stay here with me all the time?" Jungkook sat up moving around the bed to find a comfortable position. Taehyung stood up and nodded wordlessly, helping him fix the pillows behind his back."You shouldn't have slept in this chair, just sleep on the sofa there." He frowned gesturing to where Yoongi was. "You are gonna have a sore neck."Taehyung got up so to stretch his body, bones pooping loudly in process and made the younger wince.
"I am fine." Taehyung assure the younger, wanting to eliminate the little trace of worry on Jungkook's forehead. "Don't frown, you will get wrinkles easily and turn ugly." He joked."You don't like wrinkles?""Who likes wrinkles ?""Does it mean you will hate me when I get older?" Jungkook asked and Taehyung bit his lip, it was too early for him to deal with this shit. Approaching the headboard, Taehyung sat on the edge of the bed and took the maknae's hand with both hands.“No one can ever hate you. How are you feeling?” Taehyung changed the subject quickly."Fine." A simple reply but Taehyung didn't take it. "No seriously, how are you?""Tae, it's really fine." Jungkook sighed and looked down, catching sigh of the needle in his arm. "Oh… I hate needles… Can I get rid of it?""It's just for while." Taehyung smiled to cheer him up. To Jungkook, that smile worths more than any medication.They enjoyed the silence between them before Taehyung suddenly turned to him, face serious that caught Jungkook off guard."You!" Taehyung whisper-shouted, jabbing his fingers into the maknae's chest. "Did you know how worried we were? Everyone was so worried about you and I was not allowed to be close to you and you didn't talk to me and then- UGH!" Taehyung's venting got louder and louder making Jungkook looked worriedly to the side to check if Yoongi was awake and turn back to Taehyung who was breathing heavily after talking without stopping throughout his whole outburst and Jungkook knew he would be sorry but for some reason, he thought he looked like a really cute angry porcupine. “What the fuck is wrong with you Jeon Jungkook?”“I'm so sorry... I thought I could handle it, I didn't want to disappoint you guys." Jungkook replied with his eyes downcast, fiddling with the corner of the sheets nervously while waiting for Taehyung to speak."You overestimated yourself.” The elder's tone was reprimanding. "Jungkook-ah you no longer need to prove your abilities to anyone! You are no longer a trainee ! And you have to remember that you are human."“Shh!" Jungkook interrupted to which Taehyung raised his eyebrows. "Excuse me? Did you just shush me?" He offendedly glared at Jungkook."I am doing this to save us from being murdered by Yoongi hyung if we wake him, you are too loud." Jungkook explained."I don't care about getting killed but if you don't promise me that you won't ever push yourself too hard again, you will see how loud I can get and-" Taehyung halted his sentence abruptly. "Hold up, that came out wrong." He muttered, feeling heat rush up to his neck."How loud can you get?" Jungkook wondered out loud purposely, but his expression remained innocent.
I swear this little shit…
"Shut it, Kookie..." Taehyung buried his face into the blanket his ears visibly going so red while Jungkook side glanced at his flustered hyung, a fond grin stretched upon his lips.“Do you have any idea what time it is?" Jungkook asked after Taehyung had regained his composure and gave the younger a weird look for asking. He picked up his phone and looked at the screen, "Seven and a half, that's why I am still sleepy, I only got to sleep for a few hours." Taehyung complained.Jungkook looked at bit guilty believing it was his fault that his hyung didn't get enough rest as he needed and patted the space next to him indicating Taehyung to lay down on the bed bed to him but the elder looked a bit uncertain. “No, Taehyung, it's okay, just sleep here.”Taehyung shook his head "I am probably going to end on the floor, you know how I move around in bed. Besides I am fully awake, can't go back to sleep anyways."Jungkook tilted his head slightly to the side without saying anything, just looking at him with his big doe eyes he knew this hyung can’t resist and let out a small victory giggle when Taehyung muttered a ‘fine’ and slipped into the sheets and snuggled up together.Taehyung rested his head on Jungkook's chest “I’ll make my pillow out of you...” and closed his eyes.“Shouldn’t we tell the others I am awake?” Jungkook spoke up. “Oh right!” Taehyung send a text to the group chat saying Jungkook is awake and healthy now and also a selca to Jimin making funny faces with the caption ”Happiness is the best medicine” to which Jungkook fully agreed to."You know what that reminds me of?" Tae asked afterwards and the other shook his head. “What?”“Remember when we were in Osaka in 2015? And you did that crazy live in the dressing room?”Jungkook frowned in concentration trying to remember which live he was talking about. “Oh! the one where everyone was asleep?”“Yeah, you teased Hobi hyung who woke up with his messy hair, but you didn’t get anything with Yoongi, not even when you sprayed all over him- you know you were lucky that he was too tired to care or else he would have strangle you to death on spot. And then you went to wake me up ... Remember? I was sleeping on chairs.”“Uh-huh.” Jungkook nodded, taking Taehyung’s hands and drew random shapes that came to his mind on his palm.“I remember leaning on head against as what you are doing now and you looked gorgeous, even waking up in the middle of a live. Unlike me who got sick and vomited on the ground and fainted in a very ungraceful way and now is hospitalised.” Jungkook said with a weak laugh, a bit discouraged.“Oh my poor baby, don’t be like that, we are gonna leave soon anyways.” Taehyung said trying to cheer him up. Jungkook blushed at the endearment.“Taehyung?”“Uh?”“Two things.”“Yes ?”“Bathroom and food. I have to piss and I'm starving !!”“Seriously? I thought you were gonna say something more than this!” Taehyung said as he got up to check the serum. “This stand has wheels. Maybe can you drag this whole thing and walk to the bathroom?” He suggested.“But will we trigger an alarm if we take off this clip?” Taehyung pointed at his finger.Jungkook looked down at the monitor of the device attached to his finger. "Um, should we call the nurse?” But of course Taehyung wanted to stay with Jungkook for a few while without anyone interrupting.“No need, it's stuck like a clothespin on your finger... I think if we take…“ he reached forward but Jungkook protested . “Wait, wait ... Are you sure?” They might get into trouble for that.“Doesn’t matter.” Taehyung counted quickly to three and plugged the device swiftly off his fingers before he can stop him.The two of them made mirrored expressions: wide-eyed and open mouths waiting for something to happen and it did. The device stopped monitoring but a shrill noise rang through the room almost instantly and Jungkook winced, looking around for buttons to press to stop it.“Just leave it, don´t you wanna go to the bathroom ?” Taehyung grabbed his arm to help him get out of bed. Uncovering the sheet, Jungkook hadn’t paid attention to what he was wearing until now; only a hospital gown over his underwear.“Cute.” Taehyung commented.“Stop it, I am not cute.” Jungkook grumbled, moving his legs to the edge of the bed.
He kept his right arm extended while Tae carried the serum holder."Now go down carefully." Taehyung offered him an arm to lean on.“Aish!” He retracted his barefoot off the floor when his toes came in contact with the cold surface. “Why am I not wearing any socks, is there any slippers?”“You’re supposed to be be lying down and not walking around the room so stop complaining.” Taehyung scolded flicking his forehead.“Jungkook-ah, why are you sitting up?”The two froze up at the voice behind him and looked back to see Yoongi squinting his eyes at them. All the movement and conversations they had was loud enough to wake him up even unintentionally.Yoongi’s eyes then landed on Taehyung next to the maknae. “Can you please tell me why you are holding the stand?” He sat up waiting for explanations when the maknaes just stared at each other like children getting caught in stealing cookies from the kitchen.“Kookie needs to go to the bathroom.” Taehyung explained and nudged Jungkook.
“Y-yeah, hyung, I am also hungry.” A loud grumble from his stomach was heard afterwards."I'll help Jungkook." Yoongi said. "And you," He said turning to Taehyung, "you go find the nurse and tell her he is awake and wants to eat- NO! Don’t give me that look, it only works on Jungkook, not me.” Yoongi deadpanned.Taehyung pouted harder, visibly dejected."Don´t make that face, just go and get him something to eat.” Yoongi waved him away."They probably will not understand what I'm gonna say.” Taehyung tried at last resort, he wanted to stay with Jungkook."Oh, I'm sure you'll find a way to communicate." The elder with a faint smile, knowing full well what he was trying to do.* * * * *At the hotel, Jimin had just woken up. For a moment, still half-sleepy, he had forgotten about last night's episode, believing that his friends were all in their bedrooms still asleep. But soon the memory of the events at the show of the day before came to his mind and he quickly scrambled up nearly tripping to look for his phone."Oh, Tae Tae!” He said, smiling when he looked at the photo his best friend had sent.
It was two hours ago, but Jimin wrote a message in response anyways.
Lol You guys look too cheerful to be in a hospital
And he laughed alone and then he added :
Take care of yourselves
Jimin didn’t like being alone so he tried to text to Hoseok and Seokjin, expecting Jin to reply soon as he usually puts his cell phone close to him and he was a light sleeper. He ordered room service and communicated with the staff in his very broken English, saying yes over and over again, not having a clue what he was saying, guess he will just have what will be delivered to him.The next show would take place in Brazil, but they had some time to stay in Santiago.
Jimin went to the bathroom to freshen up and ran himself a bath, taking his time to relax in the warm tub of water.Jimin finished and was choosing what to wear, when the typical sound of message on the phone caught his attention.Jin hyung
Why text me so early?
Did somebody hide butterflies in your pants?Jimin regretted telling the members about the incident in his childhood.Me
Haha very funny
I ordered foodJin hyung
Food is always a good idea!Me
Wanna come over?Jin hyung
Ok ok
but I need to take a shower first
I got too tired to bother washing last night lol"Eww!” Jimin cringed at the image of a sweaty Jin sleeping in the clean bed and sent a little pig emoji and didn’t get a reply afterwards so he assumed Jin was getting ready. Jin was an excellent company. Among the hyungs, even though he was the eldest, Jin seemed the most childish.Jimin searched for something comfortable to wear from his luggage full of clothes and then started to make room on the table for the food when it arrives.As usual, he had stacked all of his stuff on top of another on the table; too lazy to organize. Hoseok, being a clean freak, had always complains about it since they share a room. He said it was his bad habit he could never get rid of : piling things up in a corner until there was no more room. This time, cleaning the table had even a therapeutic effect on him, because it stopped him from thinking too much. To his surprise, Hoseok answered his message.Hobi hyung
Jimin-ssi!!!! :))
good morning!!!!!!!
cant sleep??Overuse of exclamation marks was one of the style of how Hoseok usually types.Me
yeah i woke up half an hour agoHobi hyung
I couldn’t sleep too well Me
me too
I ordered food
want to come?
jin hyung will be here tooHobi hyung
you can make an eat jin live if hyung is hereMe
I just don’t wanna be alone
eating with my friends is always good
With brothers is even better.Hobi hyung
Ok
count me in.
wait for me
don't let jin eat all the stuffJimin send an 'okay' and sat down on the bed waiting for them to come.
At the same moment, arrangements to bring the golden maknae back were made. Manager Seijin was arriving at the hospital, with the same entourage from the previous day.In Jungkook's room, the three friends have already had breakfast even though the quality of hospital food was far from what they were used to consume in the morning, it was still something.Yoongi was sending messages to Namjoon, while Taehyung sat near the bedroom window at the side, watching the doctor checked Jungkook up. The doctors conlusion was positive and suggested that Jungkook should rest for another 24 hours before the next show and take part in any activities that requries too much energy.The doctor then left, leaving them to get dressed for going back to the hotel, to where the other members were. Yoongi took the pile of fresh clothes from the locker and the maknae's shoes and socks in the lower shelf.Without the needle on his arm, Jungkook could dress himself, but Taehyung insisted on helping so Yoongi decided to give him few minutes of bonus happiness. "You two have five minutes while I go to the bathroom, he better be dressed when I come back.""Yes, hyung!"After Yoongi went out , Jungkook asked him to help taking off his hospital gown so Taehyung dragged the sipper down his back, stripping him naked exccept for the pair of boxers.Jungkook's bare back had always been a blessing to Taehyung's eyes . The perfectly sculpted musculature was breathtaking. He stopped himself from ligering his gaze too long on his body, forcing himself to focus on the task and handed him his trousers.“Hold on to me ...”Jungkook put one leg, then the other, but it was Taehyung who helped him pull his pants up to his waist. Positioned behind, he asked maliciously “You want some help closing it?”Taehyung ran his hands around the maknae's narrow waist, embracing it and resting his chin on the younger's shoulder. The contact with Jungkook's bare back was too tempting for him not to risk a kiss on the shoulder, then on his neck, making the younger shudder slightly."Ah! Taehyung , not here," Jungkook panicked and protested timidly in a low voice. "Suga hyung he-""He gave us five minutes ..." Taehyung murmured against the crook of his neck, still hugging Kookie's waist."Which must be ending," he said quickly. Taehyung provoked a kind of numbness that paralyzed the coherence of his ideas, as much as Jungkook wanted to stay like this forever, letting anyone walk in on them in such a intimate position wasn't a good idea."Um, okay... okay." Taehyung whispered into the maknae's ear, as if it was a promise for later and stepped away, the cold air hitting Jungkook's back and he shivered. Taehyung slipped the white t-shirt over Jungkook's head."Done!"With a precise timing, Yoongi went in, making them wonder if he was outside listening all the time but they couldn't tell. “Ready?” The two of them answered affirmatively at the same time, performing synchronized movements were already seen as a normality within the group.* * * * *Back at the hotel, the three musketeers, Jimin, Jin, and Hoseok were finishing the meal as they talked about the night before.
“We still have many shows ahead, is he gonna be okay?” Hoseok asked as he sliced a piece of meat.Jimin, who had just chewed his last piece of ramen nodded. "Of course he will, he isn't our golden maknae for nothing."Jin, still with his mouth full, added "Yeah, but I thought he was the toughest of us all, he even started working out regularly lately, last night was a bit of shock for me.”Hoseok who was quietly eating spoke up. "Hyung, you work out too but you just to eat like a horse afterwards but Kookie had a dieting craze lately and doesn’t allow himself to eat before going to sleep."Jimin laughed out loud at Jin who was feigning irritation but in a funny way "I eat like a HORSE? How can you say that!" He waved his hands in the air, still holding a knife.“Don´t you ? I get scared when I watch 'Eat Jin'. How would anyone eat so much a a time?" Hoseok fired back.Jimin was clutching his stomach laughing too hard at the two childish hyung bickering but an incoming message on his cell phone called him back to seriousness. “Tae Tae send a message." His little eyes ran across the screen "They are on the way back here." He told them and put down the phone.Someone ringed the doorbell and Hoseok went to open the door and it turned out to be Namjoon who heard their laughter from the hallway."Ah, that's why you guys are so noisy." The leader sighed when he stepped in and saw Seokjin and Hoseok together."I tried Jin hyung's room" he told to Hoseok, "but no one answered then I tried yours and got nothing either so here is the only room you guys can be in.""They're coming back from the hospital. Yoongi texted me.” The leader added and Jimin told he also got a message from Taehyung and asked if he wanted to eat."No thanks, I went down to the restaurant just now." He sat down on the bed next to Jimin and spoke in a slightly serious tone.“We are having a meeting today with the manager about what happened yesterday later on."Jimin frowned. “Are we gonna get scolded about it?"“No, I don't know either." Namjoon shrugged.“What happened to Jungkook could have happened to any of us,” Seokjin protested. "Its not his fault for getting sick.""You guys stop jumping into conclusions, no one said it was his fault and we won’t get scolded either, but we need to be more attentive to our health. We have a long tour ahead of us.”The mood was a bit shaken and Namjoon stood up and clapped his hands. “No discouragement, people. Let's regain our strength and move on, okay?”The mood loosen a little bit and they stayed in the room for a while and then each member returned back to their respective rooms.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Anyone who spent their night in the hospital deserved a decent rest when they were released."Jungkookie!" They perked up when they heard someone shout the maknae's name and saw Jimin waving his hand to catch their attention. The others were there too, sitting together by the check-in counter.Jimin pulled Jungkook into a hug gently with Taehyung's hands still on his shoulder and ruffled his hair. "Stop it you are making it messy." Jungkook moved away trying to avoid his hands. "It's messy anyway." Jimin hug him tighter and Taehyung frowned "Chim, be careful." "You too!" Jimin released Jungkook and turned to Taehyung and spread his arms, "come here gimmie a hug too, I missed you." Making grabby hands at him. Taehyung rolled his eyes at his best friend but leaned into the hug anyway. "We saw each other just yesterday." He mused. Jimin pulled back with a little pout on his lips. "Aren't I allowed to miss my best friend?" Taehyung grinned and wrapped a hand around Jimin, his other one was still around Jungkook. He wasn't sure if it was his imagination or not that the younger pressed himself further into his side when he was hugging Jimin but Taehyung shrugged it off. Maybe he was tired and needed something to lean onto.The others also came forward after Jimin. Jungkook was a bit embarrassed and overwhelmed at the same time by all the affection received from his hyungs. Fortunately, they let him at ease with jokes that made him laugh and didn't let him sink into a bubble of self-pity."You should rest for a bit. We'll have a meeting later." Namjoon told Taehyung, noticing the dark circles under his eyes."We have a meeting?" Jungkook asked in confusion, he didn't remember anyone telling him about it.Taehyung, who had his arm over Jungkook's shoulder turned his head to the leader. "Do we?""The manager texted me this morning," Namjoon answered and Yoongi groaned, he was in no mood for sitting through a meeting, he'd rather work on his mixtape. "It may be about last night." Namjoon continued. "Couldn't we just have this meeting right now?" Yoongi interjected, Hoseok next to him shook his head. "There won't be just us." He pointed out and Taehyung pursed his lips at his comment in a sign of disapproval. Have we done anything last night? Did I do anything wrong last night?Jin noticed his distress and squeezed his shoulder "Worry about it later and get some sleep." His tone was conciliatory.Namjoon didn't want to go into the subject at that moment, so he just repeated what he had said before. "Listen to Jin hyung. Jungguk you too, go take shower, you reek of the hospital. Just call room service if you need anything."Unwilling to antagonize the leader, the two of them decided to heed the request and headed for their rooms.
*******************************
"Which room did you get?" Taehyung peered at Jungkook's card he was holding. Room 132. "Oh." Just a few rooms apart but he was hoping they could share a room but knowing their company, it wouldn’t happen anymore. "It's okay, I can try to sneak into your room." Jungkook shuffled closer to the elder till there was no space left between them. Taehyung didn't move away either."You said." Taehyung tilted his head to look at Jungkook. Their face now less than an inch apart, and they both turned sideways to each other with their bodies touching, impossibly close. He noticed how the younger's eyes darted from his eyes to his lips a few times before opened his mouth. "Tae can I ki-" YES! He was just about to give Jungkook permission when a ping rang through the small space. "Mummy! What are they doing?" They both sprang apart into two corners hearing the voice and turned their head to the opened elevator door. There stood a woman who was holding a small boy's hands but she was too busy on her phone to see what has happened. "Hm? What did you see, honey?" She chuckled and pressed the button for their floor. "They were so close, like how you and daddy are sometimes at home." The little boy giggled and the woman looked at her child before giving the two men now at the two corners a confused look. "Very funny, honey." She smiles.
"No! But they were really close like they were kis-"
"Sush! Or else you aren't gonna have any ice cream for dinner." The mother cut him off before he could finish his sentence. The door opened again and they both walked out. "But mommy, do I still get ice cream?" The distance sail of the little boy was the last thing they heard before the door closed. Leaving then alone again.Great, Jungkook, now what have you done? The younger was second away from hitting himself against the wall. He stole a glance at Taehyung who was leaning against the rail, eyes fixed forward. They didn't say anything until they reached their floor, both walking in silence, footsteps echoing down the corridor. "So?" Taehyung suddenly spoke up making him jump a little because of his deep voice."What?" "Just now what was that?" Taehyung slowed down and Jungkook also subconsciously followed. "You-wait... Tae I- look I am sorry about what happened." The younger stuttered, all flustered feeling blood rush to his face at the mention of what happened just now."Why would you apologize?" Taehyung was puzzled. Jungkook didn't do anything wrong.Jungkook stopped in his stepped and he reached his door. Finally. "Hyung?" He looked over his shoulder as he put his room card over the detector which let out a small beep and a flash a green light indicating it's unlocked. "Want to come in for a while?" He invited but Taehyung shook his head."I really need a bath, I am gonna stink if I don't." "I will see you later on then." Jungkook pushed the door opened and peered into the room. "Sure." Taehyung watched as Jungkook disappeared behind the door and closed it with a click, leaving him standing there. He let out a deep sigh, wondering what Jungkook might be doing behind those closed doors and walked down until he was standing in front of his assigned room.Jimin
Wanna come over?Taehyung found himself smiling at the text from his best friend.Me
Sure
Maybe after my bath?Jimin
Great
Room 114 * * * * * * * * * * * *Jungkook was glad to take a good shower and get rid of the hospital smell. He ruffled the towel over his mop of damp hair and draped it back on the back of a chair and then threw himself on the bed still wearing the bathrobe, letting out a satisfying sigh as he rested head on the stack of fluffy pillows.He should rest as recommended, but his head was thinking of a thousand things at once. Nine hundred and ninety-nine out of a thousand were related to Kim Taehyung. Taehyung had a kind of inexorable magnetism, powerful energy that always managed to fascinate Jungkook. They could see behind each other's masks and it was so intense it looked organic. And indeed, his body responded to that force with equal intensity. It was increasingly difficult for him to overlap rationally with this "must-be-with-Taehyung-nearby".Why they couldn't be together right now? Maybe they would have been laying together now on his bedside by side, talking, laughing. Why are things always so complicated between them?Jungkook got out of bed and put on some clothes planning to find Taehyung to talk. He put on his underwear, then a pair of black sweatpants and a white t-shirt and looked himself in the mirror. His hair was still wet which fell over his eyes. He would describe himself as a monochromatic figure like he was sketched in black and white but Taehyung was like a rainbow who painted all possible colors to his world. Suddenly all the willingness to go straight into Taehyung's room faded a little. He began to make little excuses for not going there. Taehyung must be tired after stay up so late for me last night. Maybe he is busy now or probably asleep or taking a bath. Those endless bubble baths that made him look like a child. Not related but Taehyung liked giving himself a bubble mustache. Jungkook found himself remembering when he was still 13, how he had felt like a child- he was a child at that time. He had always been a quiet and reserved kid in the classroom. Too shy and timid to the point he cried when he was asked to sing in front of the members for the first time. He could still remember the members' faces when he started crying. Everyone burst into chaos trying to comfort him.The only person who had managed to reach into his universe of introversion, to break him out of his shell has been Taehyung. Not even Jimin, with all his sweetness, had achieved the same outcome because it takes more than sweetness, more than patience to plunge into the universe of an introvert. It's necessary to penetrate their world with a firm purpose to help the other, inspired by a deep and genuine feeling, and with a bit of daring. Taehyung had all those qualities and was able to make a complete revolution in Jungkook's life: he had helped the maknae to reach himself, to have more self-confidence, to value his potential and to bring out his best. Due to the importance, Taehyung had acquired in his life, Jungkook didn't know where the admiration ended and where began another feeling he was avoiding labeling.He walked to the bedroom door but stopped in front of it, still immersed in his thoughts. It would be better to send a message. Before going... Or not even go there... Just send a message. His gaze landed on the intercom on the nightstand. He sat on the bed and tried to figure out how to use it. A robotic female voice can be heard once he picked it up. "... room press 2" Feeling proud of himself for catching those few words, he followed the voice's instructions then entered Taehyung's room number and pressed call. He waiting nervously while chewing at the bottom of his lip. Ok, maybe this isn't a good idea to call him. He was about to press the end call when Taehyung picked up."Hello?" "Were you sleeping ?""Hm? Jungkook... No."For a microsecond, Jungkook wondered why he spoke his name if he had recognized his voice."Have you showered ?"He heard Taehyung giggle before answering. "Yeah, I just took a shower- oh! Have you tried the massage thing? I swear it was so good I could sit there forever."Jungkook heard another laugh in the background- a brighter, more high pitched one, definitely not Taehyung's."You aren't alone ?" He blurted before he could stop himself."Jimin's here." There was a bit of shuffling, then a heavy thud and Taehyung's soft groan in the background. "Ah Jiminie you are heavy, get off me!"Wait what? His brain shortcut for a split second imagining what they were doing. It's foolish to be jealous of Jimin. He was Taehyung's closest friend. But he can't help himself. Damnit, Jungkook, calm down, he is Taehyung's best and closest friend. The label kept echoing in his head. Now he'd rather not have phoned."-gkook?" Taehyung's voice pulled him away from his train of thoughts, he forgot he was still on call."Sorry" Shit what should I say? "D- do you know where and what time's the meeting ?" That was the first thing that came to his mind and that sounded like a good reason for him to call."Jimin said it's gonna be at five in Joonie's room and then we'll have dinner downstairs. What are you up to right now?" Taehyung asked."Playing Overwatch cus' I can't sleep," before he hesitated again– "I thought you might want to play too."Taehyung didn't even hesitate and agreed instantly. "Sure! Wait for me, I'm just gonna put some clothes on and I'll come over." and hung up, leaving him to chew on that last sentence in his mind.I'm just gonna put some clothes on. Jungkook felt the jealousy bit him inside. He knew that Taehyung and Jimin were really close friends and that there would be nothing more than a change of clothes in front of the other as they have done several times in the past and they still do until today. But back at that time in their first dormitory, everything was different. He was hideously shy that he can't change his clothes in front of the members and share a shower to save time and water expanses of the company; but who would like to be naked in front of a person who you barely knew for a few months? He would stay silent when the others are voicing out their opinions about a topic except.Thus Taehyung, who was never afraid to make a fool of himself, with his uninhibited and self-assured way, had managed to change Jungkook's behavior. Jungkook wanted that deference and attention selfishly all to himself. Deep in his mind was a thought resonating: 'Hyung is mine, Jimin. Get out of there!' * * * * * * * * * * * *"You know you're going to get hurt the most, don't you ?" Jimin asked as he watched Taehyung slip on a shirt he picked for him. Jimin was aware of what was going on between the two youngest of the group but he was really worried of the extent their relationship. "You surrender yourself without any fear, plunge headlong into the relationship and you spare no efforts to help the other... Without even caring about the consequences! And him? He withdraws, he avoids you-""We avoid each other when it's necessary and following recommendations." Taehyung interrupted, he didn't want to hear what he was about to say."No, he avoids you more, because he doesn't want to be scolded ever! You know that! And this happens from the beginning, ever since he entered the band. He can't stand the pressure. In a certain way, he's still the same little kid...""Stop it, Jiminie, stop! You're being really unfair and you're hurting me too!" Taehyung snapped, turning around to face him and Jimin shut his mouth. He has clearly said too much. Taehyung took a deep shaky breath and rubbed his eyes, wiping the tears."You're being unfair to him," Taehyung repeated more calmly. "He is so different from before, you can't compare that to now.""Childish?" Jimin pointed out, questioning him."Okay ... Not exactly ... But the three of us were very immature.""Jungkookie didn't have the self-confidence he has now, he got it from you." said Jimin."No he didn't get it from me, I helped him found it in himself." Taehyung corrected."Whatever! The fact is that he remains the same at heart and you just don't want to admit it.""In his heart ?" Taehyung emphasized. "Who has more right to talk about Kookie's heart? I don't know why you insist on ignoring how much he has changed!" "Physically for sure, and you are enjoying it huh?" Jimin said mischievously, eyes twinkling."Let's talk about you? Are you jealous ?" Taehyung nudged. "The three of us discovered our sexuality around the same time, remember?"Tae continued to evoke memories of the past. "You had a crush on me but I like Jungkook and him- " Taehyung stopped."Go on, go on." Jimin teased, wanting to see the conclusion of his friend's thought."He had a crush on me," Taehyung said, staring at Jimin firmly "You and I became friends," He said putting his hand on Jimin's shoulder and broke into a huge smile. "And our friendship will last forever.""I keep getting friend-zoned, you were lucky I wasn't that into you or else-" Jimin stopped to imagine what would happen if he was as smitten as Jungkook to Taehyung at that time. "Everything could have changed, but friendship is easier to keep than passion," Jimin affirmed."It's not just passion I feel for him, it goes beyond physical attraction. I want his welfare above all and under any circumstances. His happiness is worth more than mine-" Taehyung looked confused, he wasn't even sure of what he was talking about. "No, that's not it. His happiness will end up being mine too." He concluded after a moment of silence.Jimin gulped after listening to him. "Do you love him ?""Yes of course." A simple but practiced response. Taehyung had always asked himself that question and ends up having the same answer each time; except for that short period of time when he was in denial.Jimin, trying to be rational, inquired. "How do you know? Maybe you mistook his gratitude for love, feeling content and comfortable around him doesn't necessarily mean you are in love with him. Taehyung, our senses can betray us. "Jimin didn't stop making his point. "Have you told him that clearly? I mean not as we say to each other for fanservice, but just the two of you, looking at each other in the eye?"Taehyung pursed his lips before replying. "No."Jimin seemed satisfied with the answer as if he had succeeded in his intention. "Well, friend, do that first, and then we'll talk again."Saying this, he gave Taehyung a light punch on the shoulder and left, closing the door and leaving an atmosphere full of questions.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Jungkook was lying on the bed, listening to songs from his cell phone playlist. Some has been selected by Tae and others by Kookie. Everyone in the group was always listening to music. Each one had his preference. Tae was quite eclectic, because he liked everything a little, including classical music. It was not uncommon to find him asleep to the sound of some composer like Chopin, with his ‘Berceuse’, or Brahms with his classic ‘Lullaby’. In his live videos he often presents several songs to the audience while he talks. That was another habit Jungkook had assimilated, like so many others. It was more and more evident how each one had influence over the other, although most of the time it was Tae who influenced Jungkook. This made the maknae wonder about his own individuality, his tastes, his desires. Being an introverted person, he was very observant and thoughtful and was dazzled by extroverted and shinning personalities, such as Tae's.
Jungkook was scrolling the playlist looking for some interesting music. He found one whose lyrics sounded perfect for the moment. In fact, a way of studying English without being boring is to listen and sing English songs. ‘If RM was able to learn it by watching ‘Friends’, why can’t I learn it by listening to music?’ Kookie listens to the opening chords of "We Could Happen," by AJ Raphael, an American musician descendant of Filipinos who started posting videos on YouTube and later made his name on Spotify. The song had a lively, ukulele beat, and the lyrics were about the possibility of some special relationship between two people ...
“I´ll hold the door
Please come in and just sit here for a while
This my way of telling you I need you in my life
It´s so cold without your touch
I´ve been dreaming away too much
Can we just turn this into reality...”
Kookie is brought back to reality by the insistent ringing of the doorbell. It could only be Tae. JK peers through the peephole and sees a flashy creature all dressed in yellow, who was abusing the doorbell. He smiles to himself and opens the door.
“Ta-daaaa!” Tae announced, opening his arms. “ How about my outfit?”
“Hmm ... too much yellow?” He replies, still smiling.
Tae laughs and enters. JK closes the door and walks by Tae, who backhugs his waist and whispers at Kookie's ear, brushing JK´s nape with his lips:
"Do you really want to play ?"
Jungkook smiles and bites his lower lip. He knew what Tae was talking about. And Tae knew, even without looking, that Kookie was smiling and reading between the lines of his words. Before Kookie answered, Tae comments on the song:
"Oh, are you listening to it?" He says, taking the cell phone from the other. And he begins to sing the part that was playing.
“Cuz I´ve been thinking about you lately
Maybe you could save me from this crazy world we live in
And I know we could happen cuz you know
That I´ve been feeling you
I know you want me...”Then he stops in front of Kookie and repeats the lines he had sung :
“You know I'm feeling you and I know you want me ...”
It was as if Jungkook had stopped breathing or had been pinned down by some gigantic web. Tae slips his hand around JK´s waist and brings his lips closer Kookie’s nape, giving him a soft kiss. Then Tae kisses him on the tip of his ear. He knew this made the maknae shiver. So whenever he could, Tae played with JK's ear, a gesture that many interpreted as part of fanservice, but which was, in fact, their secret pleasure.
As if to undo the initial tension that his statement had caused, Tae surrounds Kookie and keeps singing, following the music, and smiling:
“He's my friend
And he says that we belong together
And I'll sing a song
To break the ice
Just a smile from you would suffice”
The lyrics seemed to add even more meaning to Tae's deep voice, making Kookie think about them ...
To reiterate even more the meaning of the words , to leave no doubt in the maknae´s spirit, Tae approaches him and whispers into his ear :
“I want you just for me...”
Saying this, he back hugged the other tightly, as if he didn't want to let go of him any more. Tae felt Jungkook's physical superiority and he knew that, if JK wanted , he could disentangle from that embrace and throw him far away ... But the maknae couldn’t resist, letting Taehyung do whatever he wanted to do with him. And as if following a familiar path, Tae's lips brushed JK´s nape and reached his newly washed face, still with scent of soap, and their lips touched lightly, as if Tae was asking permission from Jungkook to kiss him. For a moment their gazes met and Tae realized that there was a mix of fear and desire in JK's eyes. Their breathing changed and their arousal was already evident. Tae decided to end that tension kissing Kookie's lips without thinking twice. It wasn’t their first kiss, but they always felt like it was. Because they couldn´t shout from the rooftops what they felt for each other, because everything had to be so hidden, the sensations were all very unique and intense.
Oblivious to everything that was happening, the songs were playing and each one had a special meaning for both of them. The song 'Seventeen' by Troye Sivan, which they used to hear together, spoke about the sexual debut of a seventeen-year-old boy :
“I got these beliefs that I think you wanna break
Got something here to lose
That I think you wanna take from me
You say that I´m asleep
But I wanna be awake...”Jungkook corresponds to the kiss, with closed eyes, surrendering himself to Tae’s touch, who slips his hand by the waistband of Kookie´s pants and boxer briefs, embracing his narrow waist and feeling immense pleasure. Even more when he realizes that the introverted maknae not only does not resist his touch, but also shows a subtle relaxation, slowly surrendering and allowing Tae to surpass certain limits. It was as if, each time, a barrier was brought down and both advanced to a new stage. Attitudes of permissiveness like that would be unthinkable according to the rigid Korean standards of interpersonal relations, so full of obeisances, regulations, and hierarchies. But between them there was a security bubble, which protected them from all criticism and rules, a place where none of this existed. A simple exchange of glances or gestures could bring down all those walls and barriers and bring their souls closer, making them touch each other and almost mixed. Their souls felt the need to bring their bodies together.
Still kissing Kookie, Tae slips his hands under maknae's shirt, carissing up and down Kookie´s back until they stopped again at the waist. Tae stopped kissing him to look into his eyes, as if asking permission again, so his hands slid a little more. And Kim Taehyung seemed to have the safest and most convincing look in the world, because even with all the fear clutching Jungkook's chest, even with all the ancestral alarms firing in his mind, his gaze softens as if he said "yes" internally to Tae who, guessing JK’s wishes, kisses him once more. Jungkook's heart beats faster and Tae could feel as if it were in his own chest, since they´re in perfect sync. They gasp together when Tae's hands run down the curve of Kookie's hip and rests on his buttocks, pushing them along with the maknae's body against his own body. This movement makes Jungkook groan with pleasure, what turns Tae on to the point that he asks in a low, strangely hoarse voice:
“Show me...”
Kookie knew what Tae was referring to and overcame all his shyness to grant the request. Only the extreme trust he had in Tae made him able to overcome barriers that were before insurmountable. Even so, internally there was still a conflict between former JK and JK post-Kim Taehyung. The conflict was only momentarily subjugated by the force of desire and passion.
Keeping his eyes on Tae, as if to ask for support, Kookie drops the waistband of his pants with his underwear and exposes his erect penis. Tae looks down at his friend's cock. He gulped, mesmerized. He could feel his own penis throbbing, aroused. He raises his eyes to fix them again on Kookie's.
“Can I ... ?” He whispered.
An almost imperceptible nod of Kookie´s head gave Tae permission. But before doing what he intended, Tae decides to take off his shirt, exposing his pale and smooth torso and revealing his aroused nipples. He knew it would please the other and make him more comfortable, making him feel that he wasn’t the only one vulnerable and exposed there.
Kookie's eyes fixed on Tae's neck, on his shoulders, on the protuberance of his collar bones - which gave Tae a slim and elegant complexion - and descended down to sink into his aroused nipples.
Tae gently touches Kookie's cock and hears the maknae's groan. Every sound emitted by JK reverberated in Tae´s body with an ever-increasing intensity, which he himself couldn’t even estimate. Tae whispers in JK´s ear:
"Let's not do it standing here ..."
JK understands, pulls himself together, and before Tae could think, he had already been lifted by the maknae's arms and laid on the bed. Perplexed by the attitude, but approving the initiative, Tae watches as Jungkook gets rid of his clothes and gets comfortable next to him.
“Your turn.” Kookie says.
At the command, Tae also gets rid of the rest of his clothes, flinging it away from the bed in a spectacular manner . Tae´s boyish side makes a mischievous face. Jungkook wonders how Tae could be a sexy man and a playful boy at the same time. In fact, Tae did everything to relax the maknae, so that he felt no guilt or remorse, for being together in bed.
It seemed that the time and the molecules of air between them were suspended so that they could observe each other. As if they had never seen each other's bodies. Or as if, for the first time, they were allowed to look without embarrassment ... Jungkook's perfect body shape, his well-developed abdomen, his moles and even the smallest scars were details which Taehyung knew so well that he could even map them ... Taehyung's body was slim, attractive and sexy, with no defined abdomen, with a slight little tummy that JK said was made out from pure hamburger ...
Tae knew that those encounters between them were awakening unique sensations for both of them and were building something special that even themselves would not be able to explain. Because he was older and more extroverted, he invariably took the initiative. But he wanted to stimulate that attitude in Jungkook, making him more self-confident.
"Kiss me" Tae says, with his arms folded under his head, resting on the pillow.
A sensual song was playing. It had been Tae who had shown this song to JK doing a sexy performance in one of their encounters and since then the maknae had kept it in his playlist. Tae had also presented the same song for Armys at a live in Macau in 2016. It’s called "Hold me down."
“I hold my finger in the air
And tell you which the way the wind blows
For I have tried so many times
Damn that look in your eyes!”JK brings his face closer to Tae's, and his gaze lingers on Tae's rosy mouth. Tae notices, and, to tease him, bites his own lips sensuously. The expression on Jungkook’s face showed he knew was being provoked. He gasps and his pupils dilate with desire. Tae contemplates the maknae´s face and his splendid body. Tae breathes a sigh and Jungkook kisses his mouth eagerly. Now it was Tae who couldn´t stop his moans. He felt as if he were plunging into a cliff, headlong. He felt a kind of fear grow inside his chest. A fear that everything would end badly... A fear of losing Jungkook forever, of never seeing him again, of losing even his friendship. They had already gone too far to go back and make everything go back to the way it was before, when they only teased each other, sort of playing, kind of fighting, like puppies in a pack. Neither of them had any idea how their feelings would evolve into something so intimate and deep.
To kiss Tae, Jungkook had bent over him, resting his elbows on the bed. In this position, frontal contact was inevitable. With their breathing starting to accelerate, their arousal was evident. Tae groaned, and his hands, sliding up and down maknae´s back, closed around the curve of Kookie's ass, giving it a squeeze.
"I want you ..." he murmured, just before deepening the kiss and plunging his tongue into Kookie's mouth.
They kiss and feel their penis throbbing again. Tae slides one hand between their bodies and holds Kookie's erect penis. Looking right into Jungkook´s eyes, he sends a message that was immediately understood and the maknae begins to imitate his movements. They slide a little to the side so they can masturbate each other , face to face. Keeping their faces still close, they kiss passionately and Tae whispers :
"Mine ... mine ... you're mine ..."
Kookie responds, gasping:
“... I’m yours...”
The movements intensify, accelerate.
“... faster ...” - Jungkook whispers –“ ... more ...”
Saying this, he kisses Tae's shoulder and starts a bite that turns into a gasp. Without the strength to say much more, Kookie mumbles, feeling that he will come:
“V ... I'm ...”
Tae pushes gently Kookie's face a little away because he wanted so badly to see JK come and enjoy the ecstatic expression on his face, a mixture of despair and relief in those entrancing eyes. He passes his free hand over JK´s hand, who has weakened the movement in his cock, and keeps striking both penis simultaneously, without taking his eyes off Kookie, saying, with an irregular breathing:
“ I want you .... I've always wanted you ... I've wanted you for a long time ... a long time ...”
And he feels Kookie's ejaculation and his cry of relief mixed with his own. Tae lowers the pressure on their cocks when he feels the tremors in their bodies diminish, bringing relaxation to both. He leaves his hands on the bed as he tries to regain his normal breathing. He looked for the sheet, which had fallen to the side, to be used as a towel. He looks at the maknae, who was panting too, but who had an indecipherable expression in his eyes. Was it ... sadness? Leaning on his elbows, Tae pulls his face closer to Kookie's, and, kissing him, asks softly :
“Hey ... what? ... Was it ... so bad?”
Jungkook, looking at him, smiles almost sadly.
“No ... It was good ... Too good to ... It was ... incredible ...”
“Then...?"
“Then I realized now how lost I am ..." -and, in the face of Tae's confused expression, he adds - "How hopelessly lost I am ..."
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Tae's cell phone rang, rang, rang ... ‘Am I wrong / Falling in love with you? Tell me, am I wrong?’ It rang nonstop. And again and again. Someone who was impatient and nervous spoke to himself:
“Pick up ! Pick up ! Pick up the phoooone !”
In the room where the cell phone was ringing, there´s only the snoring of two bodies asleep as witnesses.
‘Am I wrong / Falling in love with you? Tell me, am I wrong?’
Tae, with his arm over Jungkook as usual, finally woke up and moved on the bed. He found the darkness odd. He realized the cell phone was ringing and reached for it on the bedside table, next to Jungkook, who didn’t even move. “Sleeping like a rock, as always ... " Tae thought, kissing JK´s shoulder. He recognized Jimin's number.
“Hello ? Chimchim?"
“Tell me you're not in JK's room, brother." He hastened to say.
"Uh ... but why ... ?" He replied, still drowsy, rubbing his eyes. "I am."
“Namjoon is coming. Not alone. With a manager.”
“Now ?!” He exclaimed, panicked, looking at JK's peaceful face. "What time is it?"
“5pm.”
Tae's brain tried to work fast, looking for a strategy, but it was Jimin who gave him an idea :
"Leave JK asleep, as he probably is, and get out of there. Go to your room, get ready for the meeting, while I'm gonna try to delay them."
“JK will not understand anything when he wakes up."
“Don’t think about it now! Go !!!”
Tae acted according to Jimin´s directions. Jimin knew his friend very well and was a very attentive person, always tuned in to the whole group. He knew that Tae had gone to meet Jungkook, so when he realized the group meeting time was coming, he tried to get in touch with Tae. After he knew that RM was going to check, along with a manager, Jungkook´s health conditions, he decided to call. Tae, wearing only a bathrobe, ran silently through the corridor carrying his belongings in his hands like a fugitive. He absolutely hated it . He felt himself oppressed and wanted to be able to put an end to that situation. Luckily there was no sign in the maknae's room that could indicate what they had done. Tae had been careful.
He had barely entered his room, cautiously closing the door behind him, and he could hear footsteps coming from the end of the corridor. He wanted to watch through the peephole, but it would take precious minutes that he should use to dress up. ‘After the meeting, I can talk to Jungkook and explain everything to him. Of course he’ll understand. He is no longer a child’, Tae thought, as he dressed himself.
During the meeting, some reports on the sequence of concerts in Brazil and the United States, closing the tour for the Americas, and, in the longest sequence, Thailand, Indonesia, the Philippines, Hong Kong, Australia, Taiwan, Macau and, finally, the return home in Seoul. Yoongi paid a lot of attention to the figures, to everything that was related to money. It´s not by accident that the group called him the official treasurer , especially when they were traveling.
The second part of the reunion considered the latest events during the show at Movistar Arena. JK wasn’t attending the meeting because the managers decided he should rest. They also talked about the importance of everyone maintaining their physical condition as they were still at the beginning of the tour and the intention was always to keep the performances to the same level of excellence from the beginning to the end of the show sequence. Some requests were made regarding keeping sleep, eating well, not exposing themselves to risky situations, among other things. Everyone understood and agreed. Before finishing the meeting, one of the managers asked to speak privately with Tae and they both left. The others exchanged glances. Jimin swallowed, wondering what it might be. His thoughts were interrupted, however, by Yoongi's complaint:
"Since we're done, I think we can eat, can’t we?"
"Folks, your dinner is on the way. There will have wine and soda, for those who don’t drink alcohol. - said a manager - But no excesses, since we are going to film a part, for ‘Burn The Stage’.
Yoongi was expecting this. After all, there was a camera in the room and they weren’t filming anything yet. Jhope and Jimin stood up to set the table.
“ I think JK could be here ... Is he going to miss dinner too?” Jimin whispered.
"I think so too, but he must be really tired. What I find odd is that particular talk with Tae." said JHope.
“Ah ..." Jimin said briefly, pressing his lips.
Suga and Jin were exciting about drinking some alcohol to relax. With the arrival of room service, they were looking for the wine bottles.
“There's white and there's red.” Said Suga.
“Here's the soft drinks. They´re very cold.” Namjoon said, putting several cans of Coke on the table.
"Let's leave some in the fridge. Does everyone want to drink Coke first?” JHope asked.
"I know I need a glass of wine.” Said Suga. – “Who’s gonna drink it ? Do you want white or red? For me , it doesn´t matter. Jin? Jimin?”
“ I vote for red wine.” Said Jin.
"I'll have a bit, but only white." Said Namjoon.
"For me, white, too." Said JHope."
“I'll open both then." Suga concluded.
Taehyung returned without the managers. The boys were left alone with the camera and the film director. The group decided not to ask Tae about the conversation he had with the manager, since the filming was about to start, instead they asked him where he wanted to sit and what he wanted to drink. They finished set the table and chose their seats.
"Bro, will you have wine?" Jimin asked V, with a meaningful look, since he knew Taehyung has low alcohol tolerance.
Tae returned the expressive gaze to his friend, replying :
“Just one glass.”
Filming begins while they’re talking about amenities : their performances, the audience, how fans were receptive. They enjoyed the food. Jin made a few jokes, but only Jimin actually laughed, most of the time because he found Jin hyung extremely funny.
After eating enough and having a few glasses of wine, they all became a bit more talkative, especially Suga, who had drunk more than his friends. He talked about his life and the hardships he went through, when he needed to save money but bought lottery tickets every week. He said he once dreamed of lucky numbers, spoken by a pig and everyone laughed a lot, even Taehyung, because Suga definitely knew how to tell a story.
During the filming, Tae didn’t move away from his cell phone and, discreetly, sent some messages to JK. But he got no immediate response. He tried to focus on what the others were saying , but he was deep in his thoughts and talked very little. Namjoon realized that and, as he was aware of the managers' intentions to keep Jungkook and Taehyung apart, he tried to encourage him to participate more in the conversation, recalling a funny fact that happened to both of them. Because Tae respected Namjoon too much, he tried to interact more, but, in his mind, some thoughts were clashing: the pleasant moments he had with JK, their strong bond, and the oppressive talk he had with the managers, their words... "Do not comment on Jungkook because everything you say will be edited." Tae was so tired of it all ! Tired of living on camera all the time, of not being able to show their real lives, of having to live with a facade to mask the truth untold. They all could speak about what they felt when Jungkook collapsed, everyone but him !! Who wouldn’t find that odd, knowing how much they were friends? Hiding their displays of affection, which should be seen as natural between two friends... Didn’t that catch much more the attention of the audience than letting it happen freely? Did they think Armys didn´t observe those details and didn’t read between the lines of the editions ? He and JK learned how to send subtle messages to each other and also to the audience, when necessary , but it was exhausting !
They´re done with filming and the director released the boys to talk, eat and drink freely. The film crew said goodbye and the group was alone.
"Ah, finally," said Suga. Then, getting up and going to the sideboard where there was a bottle in the ice bucket, Yoongi asked Jin if he wanted more wine.
“I'll make that sacrifice ...” - joked – “Just because it's you , huh, Yoongi.”
Jimin, who had a high alcohol tolerance, took another glass of wine and decided to change places with Jin to pay attention to Taehyung, who was strangely silent.
"Hey, Tae ..." he called, smiling, trying to get some reaction from his friend.
"Can I take a sip of your wine?" Tae asked, unexpectedly, showing his empty glass.
“Just a sip. I don’t like what I see ... I can read "bad intentions" written in your eyes, bro.” Jimin answered, handing him the glass.
Tae picked it up and took a large gulp. He returned the glass to Jimin and looked back at his cell phone. Jimin was about to ask Tae something, but Suga interrupted the moment with a proposal :
“ Let's make a toast!” Said Yoongi, who was already a little drunk.
“A toast! A toast!” Echoed Jin, visibly more relaxed.
Tae was completely oblivious to what they were proposing, but when Yoongi offered him a new glass of wine for the toast, he accepted. Namjoon put soda on his glass, because he felt he had to give an example of balance. Hobi had drunk little, but he was already sleepy and put soda for himself too.
“May the shows in Brazil be memorable and the rest of the tour be without any serious incident!” Said Suga, raising his glass.
"May no one get sick or injured !" Jin added, tapping the side of his glass on Suga's.
“May our performances be impeccable!” Said JHope, following the implicit logic that each would pronounce a toast, and tapping his glass on Suga and Jin's.
"May the Armys continue to love us more and more!" Said the affectionate Jimin, raising his glass and tapping it on the other´s glass.
“May Army´s heart be touched by the truth of our songs !” Namjoon said, also raising his glass to toast.
Everyone was waiting for Tae's toast, but instead he commented with a certain sarcasm in his voice, using words that Namjoon had said:
"THE truth ..." - he took another sip of wine - "Truth, you said ..." – he repeated with a strange smile.
Jimin suddenly felt a chill, anticipating what Tae could say or do. “No, brother, no ...”
“That´s what I want : live... the truth ! Live a REAL LIFE !!” Tae said, raising his voice.
They were all taken aback. JHope, who was almost dozing off, was suddenly awake. Suga looked at Tae, tilting his head, then raised his eyebrows. Jin became serious. And Namjoon, feeling particularly teased by the words he heard, shook his head, saying :
“Spill it, Taehyung.”
"I'm tired of not being able to live the truth of my life, of having to wear a mask ... Our songs express our truth ... But are we saying everything?”
JHope frowned as if trying to reach Tae's thought, with no success.
“Welcome to showbiz, kid!” - Suga said, a little ironic and in a slightly slurred speach – “They did not warn you that would be like this? I know it's hard” - and took another sip of wine – “but that's it or go back to your old life.”
Hobi seconded Suga's reasoning and tried to organize his thoughts that remained confused :
“We can’t run the risk to lose everything we achieved ... There's so much at stake ..." He rubbed his eyes, feeling they weigh. Definitely, just like Tae, he also had low alcohol tolerance.
"We all make sacrifices, V. Each of us has our own hardships and frustrations and that´s something we´ll have to learn to deal with." argued RM.
"But who has been as much repressed as I have ?"
"Don't you wonder who has been as bold as you?" Inquired the leader calmly but seriously.
"Bold ..." Tae repeated, taking another sip of wine under Jimin's worried gaze. "For loving someone am I being bold ?”
The question seemed to have created a vacuum in the atmosphere that stole all the oxygen from the room. Jimin wanted to prevent further compromising consequences from Tae's words and decided to intercede, trying, unsuccessfully, to take the glass off of Tae's hand:
"You've had enough, Tae, you're not going to be okay later ..."
Jin decided to support Jimin’s wise attitude and said :
"Yeah, Taehyungie, we'll talk about it tomorrow ..."
“I LOVE Jungkook.” Tae announced, with his head held high.
The statement made Hobi's eyes widen. Suga secretely applauded the courage of Tae's declaration and his gaze showed it. Jimin covered his face with his hands, as he usually does whenever he feels embarrassed. Jin looked at Namjoon as if asked him: "What do we do now?" Namjoon said, trying not to imprint on his words the speed he usually gave them when he was flustered:
“Taehyung, I know... we all know, how close you both are, that you are more than friends ... But love ... It's serious stuff. Have you ever thought about all the implications of assuming a gay relationship in our country? And, particularly, as part of a famous kpop group like ours ? Have you forgotten all that tension last year when Dispatch announced that it would reveal a gay couple from a Kpop group and that the age difference between the two was precisely two years? Since then we are in the spotlight and you are well aware of that... ”
Jimin poked RM, saying in a low voice :
"I don´t think he's following what you´re saying, Namjoon. He won’t remember anything about this conversation tomorrow ...”
Tae, with his gaze wandering through the room, mumbled, as if he was speaking to himself, since he wasn’t responding to anyone :
“Bunch of lies ... If it´s fanservice, that’s okay ... It's gladly accepted .... It's even stimulated!” - sighed – “ If it's to be real, is it forbidden? What hypocrites ... " Tae complained softly, closing his eyes and resting his head on the table, feeling the sleep enveloping him.The glass got loose in his hands and Jimin took it off. Jin motioned for Namjoon not to say anything more and only talking later, when they are all sober, at least. JHope and Suga, sleepy, just watched. Jimin said in a low voice:
"I'll try to take him to his room."
Jin got up to help.
"We had better go to bed," Suga said, drinking his last sip of wine.
Namjoon also got up to clean the mess on the table, since that was his room.
"Bro, come with me." Jimin said in Tae´s ear – “It’s bedtime...”
Tae raised his head from the table, with a kinda lost look and asked :
“JK is here?”
His friends looked at each other.
"He's not okay ..." JHope said to Jimin.
Jimin answered Tae , holding him by the arm to help him to get up :
"No, he's sleeping, and you gonna sleep now, too."
Everyone went to the door, they said goodbye to Namjoon and left, heading for their respective rooms. Jin helped Jimin guide Taehyung through the corridor.
“Can you handle it?” Jin asked when they stood in Tae's room doorway.
"Leave it to me, hyung. Go to sleep...”
"You know if you need me, you can call me, eh, you little brat?"
Jimmin smiled and his eyes closed in his usual cute way. Jin walked away and the two friends entered the room. Tae disengaged himself from Jimin's embrace and turned around to the door to go out and look for Jungkook. Jimin was faster and held him by the shirt.
“Where do you think you're going?"
“I ... need to talk to JK ..." Tae said with pleading eyes.
"No-no-no-no-nope ... You're going to take a shower before bed. Then tomorrow you’ll feel much better and talk to him ...”
Tae put his hand on his stomach and said :
“I think I'm going to throw up ...”
“Aaa .... Run ! ... “ shouted Jimin, almost pushing Tae to the bathroom.
Tae leaned over the toilet and vomited everything he had eaten and drunk. Jimin tried not to embarass him:
"Ah, that's better ... You'll be fine, baby ...."
Jimin turned on the shower while Tae was getting up, still dizzy. Jimin helped him off his clothes. Tae, with his head down, said :
“Sorry brother...”
Jimin winked to break the embarrassment of the situation. He helped Tae to get in the shower.
“It's warm, as you like ...”
Tae started crying.
“No, baby, no ...” - said Jimin, moved – “It's okay ...”
“ I messed it up... ? Our aftershow dinner ... our toast ...I messed it up ?”
“Not at all. You needed to vent out. Everyone will understand ... " Jimin said, holding the other by the shoulders, under the jet of water.
“JK ... where's JK?” Tae asked again, letting the water run through his mouth.
Jimin responded patiently:
“I’ve told you ... You can’t talk now. You're not okay ..."
“I want to talk to him now..." Tae insisted, pouting as the water flowed over his lips.
“Don’t be a little kid, let's go ...Finishing in 1, 2, 3 ...” - and he turned off the water, then got the bathrobe to put on Tae and reached for a towel.
Jimin tried to relax his friend while rubbing the towel in his hair:
“Zero alcohol tolerance : confirmed !” - and, smiling, he added – “Neither beer nor wine: nothing!”
Tae only said, somewhat embarrassed:
“Sorry, bro.”
“Oh, come on, brother. I've already drank much more than you in my life and I've made fool of myself as well. It's better we don’t comment ... " Jimin joked.
After helping Tae get dressed, Jimin removed the bedspread before putting his friend into bed. Tae had no more strength when he said, with his eyes already closed:
"We can’t rule the heart .... If I could ... I should ... fall in love with you, Chimchim."
After saying that, Tae fell asleep. Jimin sighed, looking at his friend. What he felt for Taehyung was more than friendship : it was an unconditional brotherhood that at first he had misinterpreted, due to the physical attraction that Taehyung unleashed and the admiration that Tae had sprouted in his heart. Looking at Tae's sleeping visage, that face with delicate features, Chimchim mumbled to himself:
“Don’t give me ideas, bro ...”
And he quietly left the room.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
As soon as he woke up, JK tried to get in touch with Tae by his cell phone, but he didn’t expect another person to answer:
“Jungkook-ah ...” - Jimin said – “Are you okay?”
“Er ... are you on Tae's cell phone?”
“Tae left it on the table last night.”
The eagerness to speak with Taehyung only increased within Jungkook's chest. He had seen the messages that Tae had sent during the meeting, but he wanted to respond it in person. To know that Tae wasn’t with his cell phone was an important detail, because Jungkook knows Tae always sleeps listening to some music, unless he was exhausted or...
"So ... how was the meeting yesterday?" Jungkook asked impatiently.
“The ordinary part or... the exciting part?” Jimin teased.
“Exciting part?” Now Kookie’s brain began to work like crazy to realize what had happened.
JK heard Jimin's doorbell ringing.
"I have to open the door. Hold on...”
Jimin left the cell phone on the bed, then Jungkook could hear all the noises in the room : the door being opened, Jimin's giggles and another voice. That voice... Unmistakable. JK tried hard to listen to what they were saying.
"Oh... I'm shitty" Tae said as he entered.
“Shhhh ...” - Jimin put a finger to his lips – “Your cell phone is with me ...”
“That´s what I thought. I came to get it.” interrupted V impatiently.
"... and JK is on ..." Jimin whispered almost inaudibly, pointing to Tae´s phone.
Tae stopped talking. He looked expressively at Jimin, then he walked over to the bed and picked up his phone.
“JK?”
Jimin stayed away, watching and trying to deduce Jungkook´s lines through Taehyung's answers.
“No ... I'm fine ... I mean ... I explain everything in person. Yes, it was... No, he doesn’t know.”
Jimin was curious. Kookie was obviously talking about him.
"I'll be there in five minutes." Saying that, Tae hang up.
Jimin asked, smirking:
“What I don’t know?”
Tae smiled. He was sure Jimin would ask him that. Going towards the door, he replied :
“The password for my phone.”
“Oh, I knew it, but now you keep changing it ! Perhaps JK is jealous?” Jimin teased.
But Tae didn’t answer. He headed down the hall to meet the maknae. **********
This time Tae didn´t ring insistently the bell. He tried to be discreet. He knocked gently on the door. Kookie opened it , after checking through the peephole. From Taehyung's body posture Jungkook could see that something wasn’t right. As soon as Tae came in and their gaze fixed on each other, Kookie just opened his arms. Tae embraced Jungkook, resting his chin on the maknae's shoulder and let out a deep sigh.
“Tell me...” Said Jungkook, running his hand through Tae's hair in a loving gesture.
Tae took the maknae by the hand and walked to the bed to sit down to talk. They sat on the edge, facing each other.
“Yesterday ... Namjoon came to talk to you?” Tae asked.
“Yes, he did. I woke up a little scared with the bell ringing ... I saw that you were gone ... I didn’t understand anything. But I thought you knew they were coming ...”
"Thank Jimin.”
Kookie wasn´t comfortable with the situation :
“Arshh ...”
Tae asked :
“And ... how was the conversation ?"
“RM and manager Sejin hyung came to know how I´m doing. And ... maybe I´m wrong, but I think they were wondering something ...”
“Kinda... ?”
"As I said it´s just an impression... But while they were talking, they were also looking around... As if searching for ... evidence?"
“I don’t think I've forgotten anything here," Tae said, struggling to remember every step he had taken before running out of the room.
“Yeah ... But maybe ... I myself was enough evidence ?”
Before Tae's confused expression , he explained :
"Oh well, I just put on my robe and opened the door ... I didn’t have time to think if I was looking like someone who had just..."
“Okay, okay ...” - interrupted Tae – “I got it.”
"They gave me a muscle relaxant to take after dinner and told me to rest instead of going to the meeting. And that was what I did : I ate, I took the medicine and I slept. I just saw your messages this morning.”
“Ah...” Tae said.
"Is that all you have to say?” JK was impatient.
“I'm thinking.” Tae replied, trying to put all the pieces together in his head.
Tae’s flow of thought was interrupted by the maknae's curiosity:
"Talk about the meeting now. Jimin said there was an 'exciting' part ...”
Tae stared at Jungkook's lips with desire. He turned his gaze to the geometric pattern of the bedspread.
“Did he say it ? And what else ?”
“Nothing else.”
Tae sighed in relief. He didn’t want anyone to anticipate anything that he himself wasn’t prepared to explain.
"The ‘exciting’ part was... that we all got a little drunk. That's why I´ve said in Jimin's room that I wasn't good and for the same reason he kept my phone yesterday. Because he saw that I would end up forgetting it there.”
"So you got extremely drunk !!" - JK exclaimed with his typical intonation –“ But ... you usually don’t even drink !!"
“No, actually, I can’t drink, but it was a celebration, a toast and ..."
Kookie stared into Tae´s eyes with a serious look. And Tae couldn’t get away from those big, bright eyes. Jungkook took Tae's hand and squeezed it lightly as if to remind him who was there in front of him and said :
"Don´t try to fool me.”
Tae began to play with the maknae's fingers as he answered, avoiding look into Jungkook’s eyes.
“Okay ... They came to talk to me too. After the first part of the meeting ... The administrative part, you know."
“Yes, but who came to talk to you?"
“ Bang Sihyuk PD and Sejin hyung ... They were very clear about us : we should not interacting so much on stage, or anything that goes public.” He stated, looking into Jungkook's eyes. "And I ... I was kind of inert... Then, during the second part of the meeting, I was still thinking about everything they’ve said and remembering what we´ve done... Our ... wonderful moment ...” - saying that, he squeezed the maknae's hand slightly – “and all that talk ... so restrictive ... " he said, running a hand over his tearful eyes.
Jungkook stared at their hands , clasped together, feeling his chest tighten.
"Everything should be so much simpler, isn’t it ? We are just two people who are happy when they are together.”
Seeing that the other didn’t have the strength to respond, because two tears slid slowly down his face, JK kept talking with a tender voice :
"That was you who helped me to find myself.”
As Jungkook got Tae's attention, he continued :
"I’ve started so young ... I didn’t know anything ... And I was afraid of everything, everyone. And you always seemed so confident, so fearless ... I was like a plant which was trying to grow, but with poor light, surviving with little water and in a small space...”
Tae showed a sad smile and said, wiping away his tears :
"Jungkook, the poet..."
The maknae gave his best smile, that one which always makes Tae forget all his worries. How could Tae not love the smile that always brings the child Jungkook still had inside him? It was a smile that defied people’s sorrows, bringing them a kind of healing. JK, more confident due to the praise received, continued :
"When I met you, it was as if the air came back to me, the light came, there was more space ... It may seem strange, but the feeling is exactly that : my space has widened, along with a whole new world that opened up as well. I think, at that time, I wouldn’t know how to describe as well as I'm describing today. Because I was a boy, who knew nothing, just sing, dance, laugh, play and try my best to please my hyungs.”
Tae was never tired of admiring Jungkook, who had a personality full of subtleties and many mazes, but all surprisingly beautiful. A person with many inner labyrinths may seem too impenetrable to who doesn’t care to get to know it better. Jungkook showed the manly side of his personality especially in public, but he knew how to be extremely sweet and delicate in private. That versatility was one of his many qualities which enchanted Kim Taehyung so much. Sometimes Jungkook could give the impression that he was a cold and distant person, but deep down, Tae knew that all this was an armor that his friend used to protect himself, to cover up his deep fragility in the face of people´s feelings and of his own. The tougher the carapace that an individual uses then the greater his emotional fragility. In this regard, Jungkook matched Suga's personality. Maybe that's why Yoongi and the maknae got along so well.
A shadow passed through Tae's mind, after hearing the maknae´s words and he said:
"So I've been a great help to you, right?"
“I owe a little to each of my hyungs, for all I've learned and I'm still learning ..."
“Gratitude is a beautiful feeling, JK ..." Taehyung said with regret in his gaze, reflecting on the real feelings the other had for him. Was it just gratitude? A mix of gratitude and admiration?
"My father says we should always be grateful.”
That statement reminded so much the boy Tae had known a few years ago that for a second he glimpsed the maknae with the Jeon family : his parents and his older brother. When Jungkook speaks about his father, Tae can feel that there was much respect, honor and admiration. In addition, Tae can see all the layers of traditionalism and heredity in the foundations of the Jeon clan. A relationship that escaped from the pattern expected by that family seemed to him to be impossible to achieve. He suddenly felt responsible for any harm that might happen to the maknae. He wanted to protect him. But it was him, Taehyung, who was feeling unprotected at the moment. He felt like a lump in his throat. A weight on the chest. He swallows dry. He wanted to say something, but in his mind it was as if words were a large crowd wanting to go through a narrow access, all at the same time.
A text message sound came from Tae´s cell phone. Tae thought of ignore it. A moment alone with JK was more important than any message. But the sound kept repeating insistently.
“You won´t check it?”
Tae found it hard to take off his eyes of Jungkook´s face, but his curiosity made him see the messages.
“It’s Rapmon.”
“And... ?”
“He asks me to go talk to him as soon as I can.”
“Go... I can wait.”
Tae grinned at JK's willingness to wait for him. That attitude on a mega-scale was as comforting as it was scary. There was an undeniable symbiosis between the two of them, which worked well and made them both happy. Tae was sad to think that an abrupt disconnect might be being planned.
**********
Namjoon opened the bedroom door to let a silent Kim Taehyung in . Anyone who knew Tae well would know that silence and immobility meant that he was immersed in his thoughts. They sit down to chat in the same chairs that had witnessed the commemorative dinner and Tae's unusual statement the night before.
"I´ve spent the night thinking about what you confessed to us yesterday. When we drink, we end up saying what’s most heavy in our hearts. I felt your pain, V, and it made me think, reflect on many things. I was already putting together a project for after "Wings" but I think you inadvertently helped me define it ...”
Tae was surprised at those words. He thought that Namjoon would start the conversation with some sort of rebuke.
“Me... ? I have no idea how ..."
“Do you remember everything you said last night ?"
"I think I remember most of it," he said rather embarrassed. The hazy portions of the night before were concentred on what had happened after he fell asleep with his head on the dinner table. He knew Jimin had been his guardian angel, but he didn't remember the care his friend had given him.
“Among other things, you’ve talked about the truth of our lyrics and whether or not we are saying everything we feel. You also talked about ... love ...”
Namjoon didn’t want to touch a sore point then he only said:
"I kept thinking over it, and I concluded there's a lot to talk about, really. People need more love, starting from loving themselves ... We all wear masks every day, but how far does it take us away from ourselves, from our self-love? And how to recognize true love without having first developed love for ourselves? Do you understand me ?”
“ I think so.”
“ When we don’t have this self-love well developed, when we aren’t aware of our potentialities, we may end up making wrong choices because we have false impressions about ourselves. I'm not saying that's your case, but rather that you made me think about it and how, through music, we can help people in that situation.”
Tae began to pay more attention to what the other was saying, admiring him even more. Namjoon was not a leader like any other. He was very intelligent and very sensitive, besides having a tireless dedication for finding solutions to many issues.
"You know I care about everyone in the group, not only because I'm the leader, but because we're a family. We live together longer than with our blood families. And when I see that one of my brothers is suffering... That distresses me a lot ! With all that thoughts in my head, I ended up sketching a few things. I´m gonna talk to Suga and JHope, but I wanted you to be the first to know.“
“To know... ?”
“To know that your attitude gave me a start for something new and that I think much of your anguish will be reflected in this new project. Once it's set up, I'll be able to talk better. But I wanted you knew that solutions can come from storms and that you shouldn’t be depressed by some situations."
“Joonie, you know what I wrote in" Stigma "... there was a lot of my life reflected there ... It's a painful path. I don’t wanna go through all this again ... " - Tae said with a certain regret in his voice, afraid that lyrics of future songs might expose him too much.
“Keep calm, Tae. Whatever I write, I´ll show you and we´ll talk about it.”
Tae had a question on the tip of his tongue to ask, but hesitated. Namjoon seemed to have read his thoughts :
"And about JK ... I'm gonna talk to him, too."
Tae didn’t know exactly whether it reassured him or not. He hastened to say :
“JK doesn’t know about my declaration...”
Namjoon raised his eyebrows in an expression of mild surprise, for he thought that at some point Tae had already left his feelings clear to the maknae. Namjoon didn´t want to cross borders that he didn’t feel authorized to transpose, so he said only:
"V, everyone in that room has heard it, so it’s not guaranteed that at sometime, or somehow, this will not reach JK's ears. Not by malicious comments, because there was just us that night and you can trust all your brothers, but by some carelessness of ours, or by supposing that JK already knows or... I dunno ... You'd better clear things up between you.”
If, on the one hand, Jungkook had a thousand labyrinths within himself, where even himself could get lost, on the other hand, Tae had great difficulty addressing controversial aspects of his personality and exposing his innermost feelings. Only Jimin knew details that Tae hadn't dare to reveal to anyone else, not even to Jungkook.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
After having fulfilled some commitments, such as recordings of the group's testimonies regarding the presentations in Santiago and about what happened with Jungkook, for the documentary "Burn The Stage", BTS recorded the hilarious video "Spine Breaker" and did some photo shoots. There was still one day before the group went to a brief stop in Mexico to participate in KCon2017. Although Suga preferred to be enclosed in his room where he would either be resting or producing some music, Namjoon had summoned the whole group to a kind of rehearsal that afternoon. The hotel has provided an appropriate venue, usually designed for business conventions. There was a large table, surrounded by comfortable chairs, where they seated, and a huge space, where before there was furniture resembling an auditorium, which now was empty, containing only some material needed for rehearsal. Jungkook always kept his playful and childish spirit in any circumstance, whether on tours, concerts, rehearsals, shows, trips. Rarely the maknae seemed unsatisfied with anything, always trying to make his hyungs laugh at his jokes as he had done the previous day in a restaurant, or demonstrating a tireless willingness to practice and a keen competitive spirit, often a competition with himself. He always wants to do his best and says he could learn anything, as long as he had a second chance. Everyone was already used to the maknae´s characteristics, so when the meeting began, everyone noticed his silence and strange apathy. All except Namjoon, who had come along with him, and who was considering the review of some performances that showed flaws during the show.
"It's hard to find some leisure moment with so little time available. Yesterday we still managed to go to a restaurant, which opened exclusively for us! But we won’t be able to enjoy this free time by visiting tourist spots ... And we have a very tight schedule, with this commitment to KCon in Mexico.” Declared the leader.
“I don’t care.” said Suga, whose mind was still on the work he had left in his room – “Yesterday, after we talked, I started to draft something and I think I have some ideas to show you.”
Tae's eyes, which were foccused exclusively on the inattentive Jungkook, turned to Suga and Namjoon. He was wondering what conversation and what new music they were talking about. Also he wanted to ask JK the reason for his discouragement. The day before, the maknae was so excited and well-disposed when they were recording "Spine Breaker" ! It had been a fun day ! ... But it didn't escape Tae's eyes that JK and Namjoon had arrived together.
“Inspired, Yoongi?” Hoseok asked.
“Always.”
Jin, who was interested in practicing the most complex dances, eternally worried that his performance might fall short of the rest of the group, said:
"Let's start this rehearsal already !"
“What enthusiasm, eh?" Jimin joked, addressing Jin.
"Oh, it's not really that ... It's because I know I'm going to take a lot of time to rehearse, and I'm already hungry," he said, laughing.
"It ain´t gonna be a long rehearsal, Jin. It's just a few details that we have to adjust. In Mexico it's gonna be a meteoric passage ... "JHope explained.
Tae was sitting between Jimin and JHope, with Rapmon and Jungkook in front of him. Suga was seat at the head of the table and Jin at the seat immediately opposite. Tae was looking at everyone as if paying attention to what they were saying, but his gaze lingered on JK's features, as the maknae stared at the table as if abstracted in thought. Tae had noticed the outfit JK had chosen and felt that he was somehow trying to tease him, as he wore a white, buttoned front shirt of lightweight, almost transparent fabric that he had previously used in rehearsals. Tae found JK´s outfit, though simple, very sexy, and he remembered telling him once, in a crisis of possessiveness, that Kookie should not wear it anymore. Disturbed, Tae stretches his legs under the table to try to reach Jungkook´s feet, but it seems the maknae doesn’t notice Tae´s intention. Worse: neither his presence. Tae begins to get angry and decides to tease JK with something that would be impossible for him not to notice. While JHope explains how they will do the rehearsal, Tae leans back a little and rests his head on Jimin's chest, as if he is paying all the attention of the world to what Hobi was talking about. As Jimin knew his friend well, he guessed that the sudden approach had ulterior motives. Jimin looks at the maknae's face and deduces the whole drama. To help his friend´s intentions, Chimchim also leans back and crosses his arms over Tae's chest. JK refuses to look forward, trying to fix his gaze on JHope, but his peripheral vision had captured all the movement of the two friends. He tries to seem focused, but he bites his lower lip and tries to pluck some invisible facial hair...
“So that's it: we´ll start by the group mistakes, then we go to the individual performances.” Said Hobi.
Everyone agrees and they get up. JK does it quickly, as if he's getting rid of some punishment for sitting.
“Do you think we need to film?” Suga asked RM.
In matters of choreography, Namjoon always followed JHope’s decisions and, as if he had read the leader´s thoughts , Hoseok says :
“I think we should. This room doesn’t have a mirrored wall. I just got them to install that big mirror, but it falls short of what we need.”
Jungkook, who was lately very interested in shooting, made adjustments to the camera, like a pro.
"Oh, Jungkook-ah! That's great!” Praised JHope. And finally the maknae smiled.
Hobi had selected only the most complex dances, which had been performed with some flaw. There were no managers at the rehearsal, once it was something informal. In such occasions the director of choreography is always JHope. Not that he is less demanding. And he could get everyone to follow his commands not only due the experience and skill he has, but also for his personal charisma and for the affection which he has for his colleagues.
Everyone was doing some stretching before the practice. Jimin helps Tae to stretch his arms back and JK watches, this time facing Tae, as if to say :"Seriously?" In retaliation, he asks Jin to help him stretch his arms.
'Dope' was the first dance in which some positioning error has been noted by JHope. Everyone is moving, following the rhythm of the music.
“I don’t wanna say yes
I don’t wanna say yes
Sorichyeobwa, all right
Momi tabeoridorok all night (all night)
'Cause we got fire fire
Higher, higher
I gotta make it, I gotta make it
Jjeoreo”Jungkook, who sings that part, was positioned ahead and right in the center of the group, with Jimin on his left and Tae, just behind Jimin. The dance proceeds with a very fast sequence, which Jungkook performed with mastery. Suga and Rapmon, in the right corner of the group, were a bit far away. JHope yells at them, without stopping the choreography:
“Closer !”
In the next movement, anyway, Rapmon and then Suga alternate in front, singing. And the dance continued until it ended perfectly.
"Good, good," said JHope. "It would be your solo, JK, but we'll leave all the solos for last. Next dance would be "Save Me", but we did it flawless. Let's go to "I Need You”.”
That dance required them to lie down. Suga starts singing, and then JHope carries on, followed by Tae , while those who were still lying on the floor rise and position themselves until Jimin was in the center to continue the song, with everyone moving in synchrony. Jimin alternated with Jungkook's central position. A few more synchronized movements of arms and legs until Namjoon took over the song.
“It goes round and round na wae jakku doraoji
I go down and down ijjeum doemyeon naega baboji...”The part when Jin sings was very sweet, matching perfectly with his style:
“Haneuri paraeseo haessari biccnaseo
Nae nunmuri deo jal boina bwa...”Then everyone would sing a line together, but, as in the last performance Jimin had to run to position himself correctly, then, before this movement, JHope warned:
“Go, Chimchim ...”
After Jimin, Jungkook took the song, alternating with him. Then it was Jin and Tae's turn to alternate in a very smooth passage of the melody:
“Girl charari charari heeojijago haejwo
Girl sarangi sarangi anieodago haejwo
Naegen geureol yonggiga eopseo”Then again Jungkook and Jimin did their movements until the part where the maknae gives an impulse with his leg, to turn his hip in the air and to move his arm toward the ground. JK remembers how many times he had to repeat this movement to do it correctly when they were filming the MV. Tae looked at him with a mixture of pride and desire. Pride because the movement that Jungkook made was like he was dancing a ballet in the air. Desire because Kookie´s sweat was making that white shirt too much transparent.
The dance ends and JHope congratulates everyone, especially Jungkook.
“JK !!! Perfect move!”
Jin patted the maknae's back. RM clapped. Jimin and Tae, followed the leader. Suga just wanted everyone to do everything right so that the rehearsal would not be long.
The clothes Tae was wearing were loose pants and a white t-shirt. On the other hand, the maknae, who almost never wore a social shirt, had come ‘with that damned shirt today !!’ Tae was sure it had been on purpose. And he had already figured out an explanation for JK's discouragement. Putting together all the pieces, he concluded that Namjoon had talked to Kookie about something before they came to rehearsal.
“Okay ... Next is "Fire" ...” - announced JHope.
Jungkook took a small bottle of water. When Tae saw that the others were distracted drinking water too, he approached the maknae with the excuse of asking for a sip. Standing right in front of him, there was no way to be ignored.
"Is everything okay with you?" Tae asked directly, but in a low voice.
JK shakes his head affirmatively, opening the bottle. Tae, in a fast move, takes the bottle from Kookie's hands and drinks the water before him. When Jungkook teases him, Tae's response can be even more provocative. He wanted the other to react, but what the maknae did was get another bottle. Mission 'get-a-reaction-from-Jungkook', part 2 : failed !
“On your marks, guys !” JHope said, interrupting the exchange of glances between Tae and Kooky.
And the song starts ...
“Bultaoreune
Fire, oh Fire, eo eo
Fire, oh Fire, eo eo
When I wake up, in my room, nan mwodo eopji...”
That was a choreography full of strenuous moves. Jungkook still had the recent memory of his wrong movements during the last performance, when he had lost the timing of the choreography and had to join the group in a hurry. The memory of that day made him lose his focus. JHope stops the music and asks:
“All right, JK?”
Jungkook, who was trying not to draw attention to himself, failed in that intention and had to admit :
“I got lost. Sorry.”
Failing is something that always irritates the maknae. The hyungs normally make fun of JK for his failure, but they had noticed his despondency and didn’t comment anything, just positioned themselves again for restarting the dance. Tae looks at Jungkook with affection. Whenever the maknae failed, it seemed that he came back years ago, getting a child's look again. That had an effect on Tae, who bites his lower lips. Jimin looks at him sympathetically.
"Five, six, seven, eight ..." JHope announced.
The music starts again from the beginning. This time, Jungkook was overfocused. He said to himself : "Forget that day. Focus on music, this movement, now this .... One, two, time ... Turn ... Right, left, right ...”
There were no mistakes and the group celebrates. JHope smiles. He asks them to position themselves for the next dance. It would be "Blood, Sweat & Tears," the last group dance which needed some correction.
“Jimin, in the center... Ready ? ... Five, six, seven, eight ...”
“Nae pi ttam nunmul nae majimak chumeul
Da gajyeoga ga
Nae pi ttam nunmul nae chagaun sumeul
Da gajyeoga ga
Nae pi ttam nunmul...”
That dance highlighted Jimin's abilities, which stood out in the center from the start, and also Jungkook’s, in the slow-motion diving movement that required strength in the arms, balance and a lot of sensuality, especially when he lifts his hip in a very sexy way. And this movement was performed right in front of Tae´s eyes : JK's shirt had slipped , exposing his back and his narrow waist, and, in the opposite movement, exposed his abdomen. Tae gets hypnotized and has to look away to avoid getting aroused. That quick reverie and his movement to look away made him lost the focus. It was his turn to make a mistake. JHope stops the music.
“V !! Oh, let's focus, guys !!”
Jin decides to tease Jhope:
"Easy, teacher, easy ..." he said, running his hand over Hobi's head.
It was enough for everyone to relax. Tae and JK exchange a look of complicity. The first one of the night. That was something simple, but enough to soothe Kim Taehyung's heart a little. There was a certain softness in that look, as if JK apologized for disturbing him. It was as if there was so much more to say, just not at that moment. Tae kept that look as if it was a promise.
“Okay, okay ... “ said Hoseok, requesting initial positioning again.
They start over. Once again Jimin with his precise but graceful movements. Jungkook following the music. Suga begins his part, then Namjoon takes over the song, the group splits into two rows, JHope transits through the middle, singing, they all spin and it's Tae's turn to stand again in front of Kookie. Jungkook dives, turns, lifts his hips, and this time Tae stares at him, without hesitation. JK almost smiles, what makes Tae more confident.
JHope pauses the filming to go to solo performances.
“Okay, okay ... JK, your solo is the first then.” JHope observed.
“Can we make it out of order? Can I stay last?” The maknae asked.
JHope turns to the others and, seeing no disagreement in their eyes, agrees :
“No problem. So who does want to go first?”
Tae stared at Jungkook, trying to understand why he had asked to stay last. Suga and Jimin wanted to be the first. So, to keep up the tradition, they disputed in rock-paper-scissors. Suga wins.
"I'm collecting miles of stone-paper-scissors loser ..." Jimin chuckled playfully and went to sit next to Tae.
They all sat on the chairs to watch Suga's performance in "First Love." Jin and Namjoon sat side by side. JK had chosen to sit on the floor with his back to the wall and his legs bent in front of his chest. He embraces his legs and stare at Suga's movements as if paying attention.
Tae whispers to Jimin:
"He's miles away from here.
Jimin just nods slightly to keep from whispering during the presentation. But Tae was restless and didn't bother to try to disguise this uneasiness. He stared at Jungkook, wanting him to make eye contact. But the other seemed to be within his own world.
“Aeee, Suga!” JHope said, clapping his hands followed by his colleagues.
Jimin would be next. Suga, who was already finished, could stay or go to his room, but he decided to stay.
"I want to see Jimin-ssi!" said Suga.
It was enough for Jimin to make one of his typical gestures of when he is ashamed. RM cheers him up :
“Go, Jimin-ssi! Let's get it!” He said, using an expression. which Jungkook had appropriated.
Jimin places himself in front of his colleagues. The song "Lie" begins to play. Taehyung watches his friend, giving him support with his gaze. JK, who until then seemed absent, turns his face, not to follow Jimin's performance, but to watch Tae, as if analyzing him. It seems that Tae had somehow felt the weight of that look, for he turned toward the maknae, who was scanning him. Jungkook's gaze could be both intense and disturbing.
Jimin continued to dance, at the same time as he sang, even without having a microphone there, following the playback:
“Caught in a lie
Sungyeolhaetdeon nal chajajwo
I geojit soge heeonal su eobseo
Nae useumeul dollyeonwajwo”
Everyone was enjoying the perfect execution of Jimin´s movements. Only Tae and JK was having a "silent discussion" only with their eyes. Intense and meaningful.
“Okay, okay ... Who's going now? RM, Jin, Tae or me?”
“I want to be the penultimate.” Said V, looking at JK.
“Then you two decide: RM and Jin.”
“You can go. I'm not in a hurry ... "Jin said to Namjoon, laughing.
The leader nodded. And in a few seconds he began his performance of "Reflection". In the sequence, Jin introduced himself with "Awake" and then JHope with "Mama", who always brings good memories to everyone. Only the last two songs were missing: "Stigma," Tae's solo, and "Begin," JK's solo.
Tae was inexplicably tense, as if he was performing exclusively for Jungkook. He takes a deep breath, focus and, standing before his friends, he begins his presentation. Now he was sure the maknae was paying full attention to what was happening. The lyrics of "Stigma" had never seemed to make much sense to JK. He and Tae had already talked about it, but not enough.
“Sumgyeowasseo I tell you something [ It´s hidden, I tell you something ]
Geujeo mudeodugien [Only so you can keep it secret]
Ijen beotil suga eobneun geol [What I can’t withstand anymore ]
Wae geuttaen mal mot haenneunji [Why couldn´t you say it then]
Eochapi apawaseo [At any hate, I´m hurt so]
Jeongmal beotil suga eobseul geol [What I can’t withstand anymore ]
Now cry neoege neomu mianhal ppunya [Now, cry, I´m just too sorry towards you]
Tto cry neol jikyeojuji mothaeseo...” [Cry again, that I couldn’t protect you...]The maknae's thoughts were being fed by all the meanings hidden in the lyrics. 'A wound that only gets deeper ... A condition that is involuntary ... To be considered a sinner ...' Tae had only given him a very shallow explanation for those lyrics. Perhaps he had revealed everything in detail only to Jimin, a friend who is the same age ... ‘Why is he with me, anyway?’ That was the question that had been hammering Jungkook's head ever since he'd spoken to Namjoon. JK respects too much the leader's opinion. He admired Namjoon as a model of ideal aspiration, as a professional, as a person.
The song had no difficult movements to practice , but even so Tae insisted on presenting it, since all the solos were being appreciated by his friends. Everyone wanted to watch the others, establishing a type of synergy that maintained them cohesive.
Tae ended his performance by disguising his emotion. Jimin realized it and in order to take the focus off his friend's expression, he comments :
“This is one of the most beautiful tracks on the album!” - and getting up, he did a "high five" with Tae, who went to sit next to him.
JHope looked at Jungkook, who was already getting up to perform his solo. The music started very soft. Its lyrics were deeply linked to JK´s life, who had participated in its composition, along with Namjoon and two other musicians. Tae was focused as if contemplating the display of a high-value masterpiece.
“Amugeotdo eobtdeon yeoldaseosui na [When I was fifteen, I had nothing]
Sesangeun cham keosseo neomu jageun na [The world was too big and I was small.]
Ije nan sangsanghal sudo eobseo [Now I can not even imagine]
Hyanggiga eobtdeon teong bieoitdeon na na [It was unscented and completely empty.]
I pray [I pray]
Love you my brother hyeongdeuri isseo [I love you my brother. I have brothers.]
Gamjeongi saenggyeosseo na naega dwaesseo [I discovered emotions and I am]
So I’m me
Now I’m me...”
The most difficult move was precisely in the chorus :
“You make me begin
You make me begin
You make me begin
(Smile with me, smile with me, smile with me)
You make me begin
(Smile with me, smile with me)”There was no way Tae not think about the meaning of that lyrics in Jungkook's life. He talked about feeling unprepared for facing a world, finding out he had emotions and having siblings, his new Bangtan family, and that someone in that family had made him blossom. Someone who laughed and cried with him.
“Jugeul geot gata hyeongi seulpeumyeon [I feel that I am dying when my brother is sad]
Hyeongi apeumyeon naega apeun geotboda apa [When my brother is sick, it hurts more than when I am sick]
Brother let’s cry, cry ulgo malja [Brother, let's cry, cry and get it over with.]
Seulpeumeun jal moreujiman geunyang ullae [I don’t know much about sadness but I'll just cry]
Because, because
You made me again
You made me again
You made me again...”Tae was hypnotized. The movements of Kookie's body, the expression in his gaze directed at him, his strength and his agility, the energy with which he played with his legs and hips. And, on top of all that, the meaning of the lyrics was still spinning in his head. Jungkook was exposing his whole soul at that moment. It was as if he had never danced so expressively and so intensely. Fortunately, the others were paying attention to the admirable performance and not to Tae's countenance. Only Jimin, who was very near him, noticed his astonished and tender look.
JK ends his presentation completely sweaty, gasping, tired. His friends clap and praise him, enthusiastically :
"You rock, JK!” Said Namjoon.
“Jungkook-ah is no longer a baby, definitely ...” - commented Suga, laughing, referring not only to the excellent presentation that Jk had done, but also to his physical form, which was highlighted by the performance.
"You did great, bro!" Said Jimin.
“Ah, since we've finished the rehearsal, let's eat? I'm starving!” Jin said making a funny face.
Taehyung seemed glued to the chair. Jimin nudged him and said :
“Get up ...”
Jungkook takes a bottle of water to quench thirst. Everyone was leaving the room, talking about what to eat. JHope switches off the equipment and contacts the responsible staff to remove it. JK empties the bottle, looking at Tae. Jimin wants to promote a harmony in the maknae line and proposes:
"Hey, let´s have dinner together in my room?"
"I'm not having dinner." - JK replied – “I'll only take a shower and ..."
“Aren’t you going to eat anything?" Interrupted Tae, worried.
“Perhaps...”
Jimin tried a solution:
"Take a shower and show up in my room. Let's order food and, if you want, eat something, if not, we'll talk.”
Jungkook seemed to have agreed, and the three of them left the room together, then each went to his own room.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The food had already arrived and Jimin and Tae were waiting for the maknae.
"I bet he doesn’t come." Chimchim said, nibbling a piece of chicken.
Tae looks at his friend with the same feeling. He decides to send a message.
“JK still remains a little mysterious, sometimes ...” - commented Jimin, chewing – “And look, last year, while you were filming "Hwarang", we got to be very close ...” - he continued, and, to tease Taehyung just a bit more , he added - "And you're right: he's lovely ...."
Tae, who was sitting on the bed, throws a pillow at the other, saying :
“Not funny ...”
The maknae's response arrives. Tae looks and shows the screen to Jimin:
"Not hungry ! Talk to you later ?"
"Ah, I knew he was going to blow us off..." Jimin comments, removing the lid from the platter where the food was still warm.
Tae drops his cell phone on the bed and sits down to dinner.
“Did you answer ?” Asks Jimin.
“Nope.”
Tae pours himself chicken and says, a bit restless :
“Not hungry ?! Him ? He eats more than the two of us together !!... He must be devouring those Thai seaweed snacks he's been buying lately..."
“And why do you think he didn’t come then?" Jimin asks, pouring himself some spaghetti.
"Probably he wants to be alone, thinking of something... I'll come by later."
Jimin pushes his hair back and sighs.
"You know what you're doing, but...-" He takes a sip of Sprite, before continuing. - “Namjoon is aware of everything and even with Bang Sihyuk returning to Seoul, you know that Sejin hyung will keep an eye on you ...”
“I think Namjoon and Suga will be very busy tonight : they’ re creating a new song and that will take long ... The staff has too much things to do for our trip to Mexico, so ...”
“And I asked the chicken because of him ...” - Jimin laughs – “I know he loves!”
Tae doesn’t answer. He takes his phone back and checks if there were any more messages. Nothing. He opens a can of Coke and takes a sip. Then he says:
“Do you know what I think ? Namjoon might have said something to him and he´s ruminating on it so far.”
Jimin catches a portion of pasta while he's thinking. Then he says, still chewing:
"What do you think he said? About that night when you got drunk and ...?"
“No ... I don’t believe so. He might have said something that made JK turn to himself. It doesn’t take much to get him to close himself in his own world ... It's like his comfort zone.”
The talk about the maknae’s characteristics lasted until they finished dinner. Tae said goodbye to his friend and headed for Jungkook's room.
*************************************
Before knocking on the door, Tae hears music coming from the bedroom and stops to listen. Because he could hear JK's voice following the melody "There For You."
“I woke up pissed off today
And lately everyone feels fake
Somewhere I lost a piece of me
Smoking cigarettes on balconies
But I can't do this alone
Sometimes I just need a light
If I call you on the phone
Need you on the other side...”
Tae remembers that the first thing that caught his attention in Jungkook, in addition to his extreme shyness, was the beauty of his voice. He never tired of admiring it. The choice of the song wasn’t by chance. Troye Sivan was a singer that the maknae has been hearing a lot lately... That song seemed to match a lot with what Jungkook was feeling.
“Last year took a toll on me
But I made it with you next to me
Around the world and back again
I hope you're waiting at the end...”
Tae lightly knocks on the door. He hears the sound of someone getting out of bed. Steps. JK looks through the peephole and opens the door. He still has his cell phone in hand, and sings along with the song:
“I got you, I promise
Let me be honest
Love is a road that goes both ways
When your tears roll down, your pillow like a river
I'll be there for you
But you gotta be there for me too...”
Tae also knew the song, then he sings along with Kookie, since one of the pleasures that the two had in common was to sing together.
“There was a time that I was so blue
What I got to do to show you
I'm running, running, just to keep my hands on you
Running, running, just to keep my hands on you
Running, running, just to keep my hands on you...”
The song ends, and before a new one starts, JK pauses the app. Tae looks at the maknae's outfit - a dark blue, short, knitted pajamas – and he concludes :
“Ever since Jimin invited us, you already knew you wouldn't go, right?”
JK doesn’t smile, but it was as if he had been caught in a lie or something.
“Yes...” - And before Tae says anything else, he adds- "I wanted to be alone with you, and Jimin's invitation ruined everything."
"I have a hunch, but I'll let you talk first." Tae says, sitting up on the bed and putting pillows on his back. "But before, did you eat anything?"
Jungkook looks at the table where the lamp was and where some empty packets of snacks were. Tae says, a bit mocking :
"You really like that, eh? Are you going to live on seaweed now? Are you turned into fish?”
Kookie smiles. He sits down on the bed in front of Tae and says :
"When I told you I didn’t want dinner, it was true, see ?"
“You missed a good dinner. What happened that made you lose your appetite ?”
Jungkook shakes his head as if agreeing with a thought he had not yet expressed.
"I've been thinking about things ... about us. What unites us ...”
Tae wanted to be a monument to patience but he was so eager to know everything that was going on in the maknae´s head that he interruptes Kookie :
"And the starting point for those thoughts was ...?"
"There were ... several things.”
As if searching for something in his memory, Jungkook continues :
"Remember last year when you went to shoot “Hwarang "?
“Of course ... But we've talked about this already...”
“At that time ... it was the first time I felt ... that I felt ... threatened ...”
“How come ?"
“Threatened ... to not to be an important person to you ... Or important enough ..."
"I could mention your '97-line' friends too, couldn´t I ? What if I say they make me feel insecure too ? ... When you talk to them and you don´t pay me any attention ... Or when you go out with them to play bowling ... And come back very late ...”
JK smiles affectionately and says :
"You know why I got into this group. I needed to have someone my own age to chat, to share ideas... You have Jimin, Rapmon has JHope ... And I know Suga misses having someone his age. And Jin ... well, Jin befriends everyone! You know that I actually didn’t make friends in school, that I’ve soon started working and you all became my friends, and then my brothers.”
"So one of the things you started to reconsider is your importance in my life?"
“One of them.”
Tae, who was wearing the same outfit he had worn earlier in the rehearsal, nudges the maknae barefoot and says in a flirtatious way :
"Do you want me to tell you how important you are to me?"
JK gripped the tip of Tae’s foot that nudged him, halting the movement.
"I want you to tell me about Stigma."
This request was not what Tae expected to hear. Before he answers, the other adds:
"I wanna hear the part you didn’t tell me."
Tae straightens his posture, sitting less relaxed.
“Okay.”
He looks at the geometric pattern of the quilt. He was getting familiar with it.
"I told you it had to do with a disagreement with my brother. We have different opinions on many things. Maybe because we were raised ... in different environments. I moved in with my grandparents while he and my sister stayed with our parents."
“You told me that. You said your parents thought it best if you went to live with your grandparents ...”
Tae sighs deeply.
“I was having a hard time at school ... I was also disagreeing with my brother and, as I am the elder, I should be an example to him and not ... Look, my ideas were... are very opposite to my family’s. I think you’ve already realized that I don´t have an ordinary behavior... And my grandparents understood it ... And they accepted me, gave me strength. My grandmother ... She was the most incredible person in the world ...”
Tae doesn’t finish the sentence, because tears come to his eyes, when he remembers his grandmother’s death the previous year. Jungkook couldn’t resist. This time he had no need to restrain himself, after all they were not in public. He threw himself forward on Tae´s direction to embrace him. He wanted to heal all the hurts Tae had, wanted to punish all those who had caused them ...
"I'm sorry ... I'm sorry ..." Kookie says, hugging the other. "I didn’t want to ..." and saying that, he kisses Tae's eyes, his face, and finally his lips.
Tae stops crying with Jungkook’s kisses. He reciprocates eagerly. Desperately. He runs his hand over the back of the maknae's neck and deepens the kiss as if he were starving.
"Oh, you do this to me ..." Tae whispers, looking closely at JK and rubbing himself against the other´s body, revealing that he was very aroused.
At this point , Kookie was already leaning over Tae and trying to regain control of himself, but his body seemed to have other plans. He also had been aroused. His thoughts began to disorganize ... Tae wasn’t helping much with what he was saying and doing:
"You ... in that white shirt ..." and saying that, he lightly kisses Kookie's lips. "You wanted to tease me, didn’t you?"
"Wait, wait..." JK interrupts, trying to get back to his initial intent.
He takes a deep breath and tries to think of something other than Kim Taehyung lying on his bed. He pulls away from Tae. Being so close was not helping. He takes another deep breath and sits back where he was before. Tae, seeing that the other had slowed down, he pulled himself together, but kept a languid gaze toward the maknae.
"Is that what I am to you?" Someone who turns you on? " Kookie asks.
Tae sits straight on the bed again.
"I see you're really full of doubts about me ... If you think you're just that ... You're wrong. Quite mistaken."
“Sometimes I don’t think you consider me mature enough and you omit some things because of that. Am I wrong, too?”
Tae sighs deeply and looks at JK. He begins to better detail the situation around the lyrics of the song "Stigma".
"When I confessed to my younger brother that I like boys, we had an argument. It was a very, very ugly quarrel. My younger sister also was involved. Then the whole family ... That was in 2015. I was already in the group, we two had known each other for two years and you must remember how things evolved between us ... I was scared ... I started to realize the enormous importance you were assuming in my life. I just couldn’t define the feeling. I needed to talk to someone about it. It was suffocating me ... Naively I wanted to share with my brother ... I thought he could help me ... I thought he would understand ... I thought that family ties are stronger than anything and they serve to give us support , right ?”
Jungkook was about to say something, but Tae motioned for him to let him finish it all.
“That song contains only a small part of what was that whirlwind of feelings at that time ... I barely speak to my brother so far. My sister who used to call me "big brother" doesn’t see me like this anymore ... I feel guilty that I can’t be the older brother the two deserve. Someone to help them, protect them ... And my parents ... they respect me, for all I've done, but ... I know they have fears ... They care about my future, with my innovative attitude within a society as traditionalist as ours, and so homophobic too. I know they love me. But they are afraid.”
Tae sank into the bed, as if suddenly tired.
"I've always been ... different. At first I didn’t know what difference it was. But I knew that I behaved in an unusual way. This can be a problem when you live in a society that tries to put everyone within a pattern. Then I managed to convince my father that I should try an artistic career and that's how I found myself in our "Bangtan Family”. Everyone is awesome, each one in his own way. Even those who sometimes have to scold us, because it’s something that’s expected from them, they don’t judge us, they accept us. That's a ... very good feeling.”
Jungkook puts his head down. Now it was him who looked at the geometric pattern of the quilt. Tae's explanations complete the mosaic of thoughts he was trying to organize inside himself. Tae adds:
"So ... Don’t say you're not important to me. Do not even think such a thing. You have an importance that I think I can’t even explain, just feel. If you asked me to explain, I would take hours and not tell you everything.”
Jungkook raises his head, but looks away, avoiding Tae's eyes, because he also wasn’t able to deal with what he was feeling.
"And that's the story behind Stigma, Kookie. It’s my conduct, my mark, the seal of the sinner ...”
Suddenly, Tae stopped talking because he realized that the course of his thoughts could be very negative and he didn't want all this negativity in his life anymore.
“This conversation made me thirsty ... Do you have water?”
The maknae stands up quietly and grabs two bottles of water from the minibar. He approaches Tae to give him one. When he hands the bottle, Tae holds his hand and, looking into his eyes, says:
"I know that's not only that what's in your head.”
And it was Taehyung's turn to expose what keeps going round in his head since the arrival of Jungkook and Namjoon together at rehearsal. Without letting go of the maknae's hand, he asks:
"Did Namjoon talk to you? Something about us? Something that made your head spin?”
The other's expression was the certainty that Tae needed. Though he had no doubts. Jungkook sat back in bed, but this time closer to Tae.
"He was very subtle in approach, as is his style. If it was Suga hyung it would have been more direct ... He asked me how I was feeling about our "friendship" if I thought that somehow this was disturbing me. He talked about self-esteem, about seeking acceptance, about how various sensations and frustrations, or needs, can mask a situation, a feeling.
“And you've come to question yourself about your feelings and, consequently, mine.” – He drinks a sip of water before continuing – “You know, I also have my insecurities, my doubts. Many times I make mistakes thinking I'm doing the right thing. If you think I'm annoying you, that somehow, what we live, our moments, if it is disturbing you, we can stop here.”
Jungkook was inert, processing everything Tae was saying. He didn’t want to stay apart ! Why was Tae proposing this at all?
"I´ve never even planned all that is happening to us. Things were simply evolving naturally. If I was kinda reckless... if , as your hyung, I should have avoid some situations, I claim myself guilty, JK, but I ...”
“Wait ... I don’t want us to stay away. Ever since I met you, even before we got closer to the way we are now, every time we were apart, I felt like some part of my life was missing... like something was out of place, like ... I cannot explain. It's as if my oxygen is reduced. I could live, do everything I need to do, but ... with less air in my lungs. It sounds weird, I know ...” - and JK was smiling, a little embarrassed to be confessing so many things – “You said you were scared at first and you know how much I was too. How all this was new to me, that I was discovering myself, what feelings I had, discovering emotions I didn't know I had, nor that I could have ... by someone of the same sex as me. But I've never been interested in any girl, so ...”
Tae was looking at the maknae as if he was the most precious thing in the world. "You’ve stolen my heart, JK. You can do with me whatever you want and you don’t even know it” , he thought. He runs his hands through Jungkook's hair enjoying his extra volume ! Everything in the other exuded virility! It was so irresistible to him! Those eyes, which Rapmon had once described as "Bambi's eyes" ... Those pink parted lips ... After so many revelations, Tae just wanted to kiss him, to hug him, to spend the whole night at his side ...
Jungkook knew that Tae had kinda an obsession on his hair and let himself to be caressed, also feeling great pleasure in it. They were seated face to face, and Tae continued in his confessional tone:
“At school, I got into some troubles with boys that tormented me, dunno if they envied my very "social" way of being or if they demanded a more virile reaction from me ... When the problems began to get serious, I moved to another school. Shortly after, as a trainee, Jimin and I ended up in the same school and our friendship has grown even more. He was kinda my bodyguard ... Or my guardian angel ... " Tae jokes.
"I ... I'm jealous when I see you together." JK confess. Tae smiles.
“You don´t have to be. He’s really my friend.” Tae answers, playing with JK's ear.
"I've never had a friend like that, a friendship like you two have.” - Kooky says, also in confessional tone - “ I was always very shy, mainly in the school. I excelled in arts and sports because I wanted to be admired for something! At home, my brother and I only fought for rubbish, but when we fought, it was for real ... It was as if he wanted to teach me how to be more aggressive, more manlike ... Dunno... You know the scar I have on my face is from one of those fights ...”
"You say ... this one?" - and Tae, saying that, leans forward to give a kiss on Jungkook’s left cheek, right on top of the scar.
Jungkook sighs and closes his eyes, feeling a kind of electricity running through his body. He turns his face a little and opens his eyes to find those of Tae, which were so magnetizing that it was as if they dragged him inside. As Tae gets closer to kiss him, Jungkook feels a sweet paralysis, a sensation that makes him feel relaxed and turned on at same time. Every Taehyung’s kiss was always as if it was the first one... Their lips touched in a light kiss, the caress of each other sending shivers down their spins. And the maknae lets himself be led, leaning backwards, unable to hold back his moans between the kisses. Tae looked more voluptuous than ever. Thirsty, like a man in the desert before a glass of water ... And the smallest sounds emitted by the maknae only made him more turned on.
"You ... you ... you ..." Tae says, trailing kisses up Kookie´s neck. He feels like biting him. The maknae shrugs, shivering, and whispers :
“No ... it's gonna leave marks ...”
Tae says, with a mischievous look :
"I wish I could leave several marks on you ... So that anyone who saw you knew that “Jeon Jungkook belongs to Kim Taehyung "...
Those words made the maknae smile broadly. The look of happiness on Kookie's eyes charmed Tae deeply. He smiles too and says, as if a brilliant idea had passed through his head:
"This moment deserves a song ..." and, shifting his position, he took the cell phone he had left on the headboard. Lying back on the pillows, he calls the other to stay by his side. He finds the song he wanted and starts singing along and looking at Jungkook. The song was "Lay Me Down" by Sam Smith:
“Yes, I do, I believe
That one day I will be, where I was
Right there, right next to you
And it's hard, the days just seem so dark
The moon and the stars, are nothing without you
Your touch, your skin, where do I begin?
No words can explain the way I'm missing you
The night, this emptiness, this hole that I'm inside
These tears, they tell their own story...”
And, yielding to an old habit, the two end up singing together the second part of the song:
“You told me not to cry when you were gone
But the feeling's overwhelming, it's much too strong
Can I lay by your side? Next to you, you
And make sure you're alright
I'll take care of you
And I don't want to be here if I can't be with you tonight...”
Tae stops singing and repeats one of the lines of the song, looking right into JK's eyes:
“Can I lay by your side? And make sure you're alright... I'll take care of you...”
He kisses the maknae again, but this time without voracity, quite delicately, while the song plays ... [“ And I don’t want to be here if I can not be with you tonight ... "] slipping his hand under Kookie's shirt while kissing him. He run his hands up and down Kookie´s back and hears Jungkook's breathing heavily. He slips his hands down the waistband of JK´s pajamas...
"What the idea of waiting for me in these pajamas?" Tae whispered into Kookie's ear. "And wearing nothing underneath?" He said, pretending to protest.
Jungkook wanted to answer something but could only gasp and groan at Tae's touches. His cock throbbed. Tae lifted Kookie´s shirt up to take it all over his head. At the sight of JK's well defined abs, Tae remembered what Suga had said during rehearsal: "Jungkook-ah is no longer a baby, definitely." Tae craved for skin contact, he took off his shirt too, to Kookie´s delight : his eyes gazed at the hard nipples that stood out on the pale skin. Instinctively, JK took an action he hadn’t taken yet : lowered his head and began to suck one of Tae's nipples. The unexpected gesture drew an uncontrollable groan from the other. Tae's entranced eyes followed what Jungkook was doing, fully surrendered. He felt that he could come just seeing and feeling what the maknae was doing to him. Jungkook goes from one nipple to the other, raising his head slightly to gaze at Tae´s mesmerized look. He smiles and kisses Tae's torso all the way up until it reaches his face.
“Do you like it ?” JK asked, panting, waiting for confirmation.
Instead of answering, Tae gave him a passionate kiss. Jungkook, despite being stronger, yielded placidly to the other's impulses, allowing himself to be dominated. Tae interrupted the kiss just long enough to remove the rest of his clothes and to urge the maknae to undress as well. Tae started to kiss Kookie´s nape, implicitly proposing him this position: both lying on their side, as if they were spooning, Tae hugging Jungkook from behind. They’re both breathless, adrenaline pounding and blood racing through their whole body, their members throbbing. Tae placed his cock between Jungkook´s thighs, almost on his buttocks. They had never tried penetration , and Tae thought it was not yet the time. He wanted it to be a very special occasion for both of them, and not just a fortuitous, rushed event.
“Can you feel me?” Tae whispers into Jungkook's ear as he thrust his cock in and out into the space between the anus and the scrotum of the maknae.
JK doesn’t answer. Panting uninterruptedly, he only moans with pleasure at every thrust Tae gives. With his free hands, he instinctively begins to stroking himself faster. The scene was so mesmerizing to Tae's eyes that he had to try to cool down to avoid cumming. He wanted to see JK's eyes, his face full with pleasure, but in his position he couldn’t. What he wouldn't give for some mirrors in that room!
Their movements became more intense and the room filled with mixed sounds: they groaned and gasped, pronounced each other's name, emitted inarticulate sounds, typical of those who lost their breath and returned to recover it, all followed by the creaking of the bed, in a mechanical synchrony.
Tae didn’t want that moment to ever end, but, feeling that they won't last much longer , he slid his hands over JK's as they followed the movement they made, he wants to be part of it. He intensifies his own movements, feeling that he was close to cum too. Jungkook's moans grow louder and suddenly Tae worries about what might be heard outside the room. But it's too late to worry about it: the feeling that he's plummering into an abyss takes him completely and he doesn't contain his own moans.
"I love you ..." he whispers. "I love you ... with my body ... with my soul ..." and those last words were followed by gasps in a splendid and shared orgasm.
Suddenly, the whole room is silent, except for the uneven breathing of the two boys. Tae was still panting when he said to the maknae, realizing that both have dirty hands:
"Don’t move-" and he gets up from the bed, moving toward the bathroom.
Jungkook, too, was panting, as if he had run a hundred-meter race, but was savoring Tae's statement as the most precious moment of the night. He was smiling and biting his lips when Tae came back from the bathroom with some towels. While helping JK, Tae couldn’t help noticing the look of happiness that faced him.
“Repeat what you said ?” The maknae asked.
Tae´s face is of someone who doesn’t know what the other is talking about.
"And what did I say?"
Jungkook smirked, as if to say, "Are you fucking kidding me?" But Tae, unwilling to prolong this agony any longer, smiled and solemnly declared :
“I love you.”
This was Jungkook's most long-awaited statement. He wanted it to happen naturally and in a special moment like that. He felt as if he received a special gift. Even so, a faint shadow darkened his smile as he said :
"That scares me, you know that? Our love...”
Tae, teasing, replied:
“Our ? I didn’t hear anyone say that loves me ...”
Jungkook smiles, half embarrassed and confesses, as if justifying himself:
“I‘ve been loving you for so long ...”
Tae was delighted, but he was a demanding lover:
"I still want to hear it. I demand a formal statement.” He said, pretending to be offended.
The maknae straightens up on the bed and declares :
"I love you, Kim Taehyung. I love you today, like yesterday, as I’ll love you tomorrow ...”
Tae smiles like a child and kisses him with joy. They both smile, look at each other and Tae suggests:
“Those towels didn't help enough ... Suggestion: a warm bath and ... something for you to eat. I don’t want my love feeding on snacks !!”
Jungkook agrees, the same way he would agreed if Tae said "let's jump through this window and fly away". Because he felt exactly like this: floating.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The boys had already noticed that Jungkook has been in quite a good mood lately. His playful spirit was back and he had even entertained the hyungs by making perfect impersonations of each one's habits while they waited in the VIP hall of the airport. Now, just a few minutes before landing in Mexico City, Jimin, who was sitting next to Tae, advises him in a low voice, looking at Jungkook, who was dozing in the back seat next to JHope:
"It will be better for you two don´t stick together when we get off the plane.”
Tae looks at Jimin who adds:
"Because I know you can pretend very well , but Kookie ... Today he's all smiles and he's glued to you more than ever. Did you see the angry look he gave me when I sat next to you? He doesn’t understand that I did it to protect your relationship..”
Tae smiles discreetly and says :
"Chim, we'll get off wearing masks, you know.”
“Even so. A thousand eyes will be upon us. And JK is not that careful ..."
“I'll stay alert for both of us.”
Jimin picks up one of the airline magazines which had an advertisement of the beauties of Mexico on the cover and says:
"We have just few hours before the press conference and the show tomorrow. I wish we had more time. We know so little about this country!”
“Yes, like Cancun!” Tae replies, looking at the pictures on the magazine – “Imagine if we could make a Bon Voyage there! It all seems so beautiful!”
“Or... Aca ... Aca ... pulco ... Ah, I like these difficult names..”
********************************************************
From the airport they go straight to the hotel, where they barely have time to settle in and have a light meal before resuming their activity schedule: some photos for promotion, followed by a single short rehearsal they would have before the presentation.
When they came back to the hotel, tired with the marathon of appointments in so few hours, Namjoon still had energy enough to get in touch with the fans doing a Live, around midnight. Everyone else went straight to their rooms to sleep so exhausted they were. They needed to spare energy for the show. Namjoon was simply too excited to get to sleep, even though he had been working all day.
Next day their first appointment was a press conference in one of the ample convention spaces, where the group spoke quickly, then moved closer to the audience at the "Handshake Event" - actually a “Hi-Touch", due to the narrow timeline of the event. Several fans left very excited and the crowd around shouted without stopping the names of their idols.
"I was worried about this meeting because I thought my hands could be sweaty. Thankfully, that didn’t happen ... "JK commented when he was walking alongside Tae and Jimin. The trio tried to walk together whenever there was opportunity, when the staff didn’t separate them to regroup them randomly with the hyungs.
"My arm was tired of being in the same position for so long ..." Jimin commented with a slight smile. “ I didn’t want to disappoint the fans ... Many came from far away just for this moment.”
“True ... Do they think how many times we repeat the same words and make the same gestures? “ Tae said “I think we only get it because it's an incredible exchange of energy...”
"I feel like I've worked out the muscles of my face!" - said JK, laughing – “Because I´ve thanked everybody with a smile ...”
"Ah, it's okay then : you're always working out!! ..." Jimin replied, teasing the maknae.
They entered together, following the rest of the group, in the invited artists’ dressing rooms area. They were already wearing their outfits for the first dance, but they didn’t count on a turnaround in the program of the night. The order of presentation of the groups had changed. Instead of a kpop rookie group, NCT 127, open the night, it would be BTS.
"We’re going to get in soon, then??" JHope asked Namjoon.
“Exactly. There was a problem with the newbie group ..."
“Well, maybe it's even better ... We can go back to the hotel sooner. Tomorrow we’ll have to fly to Brazil !! “ Suga commented.
"The pre-show is just beginning ..." Jin said, looking at the screen in the dressing room. – “Oh, what a pitty ... I want to watch..."
“We're going to do the make-up and check the last details now.” Said Namjoon.
Starting at 7:30 p.m., the pre-show began with an opening performance of the Korea Cultural Center in Mexico City with a traditional version of Korean drum music that was edited by Joon, a Korean presenter who worked in Mexico. Shortly thereafter, the countdown began and fans - who were already screaming and crying every time a song played on the speakers during the wait - went into frenzy with the expectation of Bangtan Sonyeondan's performance. With a vigorous and impressive performance on stage, the group opened their set with their latest single "Not Today". Then smooth movements with "Spring Day". Armys' fan club had its indisputably felt presence, given their fury during all of the group's performances, which ended their presentation with the sequel to the songs "Save Me", "Blood, Sweat & Tears" and the perfect "Fire".
Due to the need to return to the hotel , the group couldn’t attend the performances of the other groups or see the end of the show.
"Oh, I wish we had more time to stay till the end of the show!" Said V in one of the cars that were taking them back to the hotel.
"I'm already hungry," Jin said."
“Oh, ah, ah, tell me something new..." Jimin joked.
"D’you know what I´d really want?" - Tae said with the air of who was visualizing what he wanted – “Strawberries .... I've been dreaming of strawberries for two days ... Kinda a crazy stuff...”
Jungkook, who was the fourth member of the group in that car, paid attention to the talk and also watched the landscape through the window. He had sat next to Tae, taking advantage of one of the few moments when they could be in public together. Their legs touched and they exchanged a meaningful look, which had only been captured by Jimin. Jin, after all the comments on hunger and food, was excited and talking about Mexican food:
“One from staff told me about some stands that sell fruits in the streets of the city ... They sell fresh and chopped fruits, but you know what?” - commented Jin– “Pepper! Chilli powder !!”
"Hyung, do they eat everything with pepper ?" Asked Jimin.
"You can order without it too. But they’ll find it odd as if you are asking food without salt!” said Jin with his typical laugh.
In a short time, the cars arrived at the hotel and the group went up to their rooms. Everyone thinking about dinner, taking a shower, packing and resting. All but Jungkook, who had an idea, when they were arriving. He had identified what appeared to be a concentration of food trucks near the hotel, and among them he had spotted one of those ones that sell fruits which Jin had talked about. He'd been in his room just long enough to put an oversize, hooded sweatshirt over his clothes and get ready to leave. He wanted to do everything incognito, even without any security guard with him, but in the hallway he ran into none other than Jimin, who was returning to his room, after going to JHope's to get his little speakers that he had forgotten with him.
“Jungkook ?!” Jimin asked, surprised to see the maknae still in the clothes they had arrived with a black hoodie on top.
"Arshhh..." Kookie said, frustrated that he hadn’t been able not to run into anyone.
"Where are you going?"
"Don’t tell anyone, but I'm going to leave for a moment.”
“How so ? Leave ? Alone ? Without security ? JK !!?” Jimin said, trying to dissuade the maknae, but finding an almost childish resistance in front of him.
“I´ll be fast ! It won’t take too long...”
“But where are you going ?? Can’t you ask it for delivering, whatever is ?”
Jungkook decided to share his idea to see if he could get rid of Jimin.
”I don’t believe fruit stalls do delivery ...”
“Fru ...? Oh, I got you ...”
“I'm going to buy strawberries.” He confessed, kinda embarrassed.
"Wait, then, I'll go with you. I'm gonna leave this in my room and I'll be right back.” Jimin said, moving away, but with an eye on the maknae. "Do not leave!" He said, from afar, before entering his room.
It didn’t take five minutes for Jimin to leave the speakers in his room. When he returned, the hallway was empty.
“Oh no...”
*******************************************************
Jungkook had come downstairs in the hotel hall without a sound. No members of the group or staff were around, nor had seen him leave except Jimin. In a certain way, that plan stimulated his adventurous spirit, which enjoyed risky situations, an attitude that often scares the cautious Kim Taehyung. It wasn’t difficult to find a smile on JK´s lips when the group activities involved some sort of risk, such as bungee jump, roller coaster descents, acrobatic jumps, etc. Despite admiring his friend's bravery, Taehyung's heart often beats faster when he watches Kookie' s intrepid peripecias.
Jungkook had paid close attention to which side he should follow to reach the food trucks. The place was very close to the hotel, so he decided to take the risk. He wanted to see Tae's happy face when he was back with a profusion of strawberries ! Kookie was not the kind of person who did things on impulse and he didn't give presents often to his hyungs. He was still learning to get out of his individualistic world to connect with the world of others. Tae was teaching him this, developing that capacity of feeling empathy for the other, the ability to love and to be loved. In fact, Taehyung had taken away a stone that retained an emotional continent still half unknown to Jungkook. Emotions that he sometimes didn't know how to deal with.
Feeling very confident lately, Kookie thought he could deal with any situation, no matter if it was the language barrier or be recognized by some fan. There were no fans around the hotel because of the precautions the company had taken to not divulge where the group would be. But even so, it was a risk.
The maknae approached the food trucks, going straight to the one he’s interested in. He observed how people was ordering and tried to do the same. His visual, however, stood out, even with the dim lighting in which the square was steeped. Jungkook’s figure caught the attention of four guys who was drinking beer in one of the trucks next to the stall.
The maknae was making himself understood:
“Straaaw...berry...?”
“ ¿Quieres decir fresa?” asked the attendant, showing him the image of strawberries in the fruit list.
“Presa ! Okay !” confirmed the maknae, pointing out that he wanted without pepper.
“¿Grande?” asked the attendant showing the size options.
Kookie nodded and added:
“To go ...”
Meanwhile, the boys kept talking about Kookie:
“Wey, este chico es maricón... Mira su cara... Mira sua boca...”
Despite the hoodie he had put on his clothes, Jungkook was still wearing the make-up of the show, which gave his face a refined and perfect appeareance and made his lips stand out in contrast to the white skin.
One young man in the group instigated the boldest, saying :
“Creo que quiere un beso...”
A sassy guy added in order to provoke a situation:
“ A mí, parece que lo necesita !”
Unaware of what was going on around him, Jungkook was proud of himself for having succeeded in achieve his goal. He had paid correctly, received the change, and picked up the package with the succulent strawberries. He was returning by the same path that he had come, without realizing that the four boys also left the square to follow him. At some point along the way, they approach him, surrounding him. Kookie didn’t understand what they were saying, but he understood the gestures they were making and felt a chill run down his spine. He thought he could handle the situation easily if he had to fight with just one of them, but there were four. When the boldest guy approached him to take him by the arm, they hear someone screaming and saw two people running:
“Jungkook-ah !!” It was Jimin's voice. He had come with a staff safety.
The leader of the group, complaining, commands:
“ ¡Pinches gringos! Vámonos !”
The gang dispersed with the arrival of the rescue duo. Jungkook , who had gone pale and frozen for a moment, hugged his friend tightly when he approached. Jimin acted like hyung, worried about his younger brother:
"JK, JK, did they do anything to you?"
The maknae shook his head negatively, a little embarrassed by the whole episode. Jimin noticed how nervous the other was and comforted him, saying :
"Oh, alright, alright, let's go back to the hotel."
The three of them returned quietly. The bodyguard, one of whom Jimin trusted most, would surely be discreet about what had happened. Jimin would rather talk to the maknae when they were alone and safe. At the hotel hall, Jimin thanked the body guard and entered the elevator with the maknae. When they arrived at their floor, he grabbed Jungkook's hand and dragged him to his room, closing the door.
“You fucking crazy !!!! What if I didn’t make it in time? Have you lost your mind?”
It seemed that only now Jungkook could really breathe a sigh of relief:
"I ... Sorry, Chimchim ..."
The use of the most affectionate nickname indicated that Jungkook was really embarrassed. The strawberries package seemed as if it was part of his arm, for he had almost completely forgotten it. Jimin realized the maknae was really sorry and softened his voice :
“That´s okay ... I´m glad that nothing happened ...”
Jungkook took a deep breath and confessed:
“I was scared, you know? If it was only one, I could handle it, you know ...” - said, wanting to show courage – “But four ...”
"And if I had went there alone ?... I guess they wouldn't be frightened, would they ?" - and laughed to relax – “But accompanied by Changwon ...”
Jimin remembered the strawberries and said:
“I think you have something to deliver ...”
Before answering, Jungkook got a message signal on his cell phone. He reached into his pocket to pick it up . And another message signal was heard, but from Jimin's cell phone. They both checked and looked at each other. Jimin said :
“Tae is looking for us.”
Jungkook shook his head. He had the feeling that his night wouldn’t end as he expected.
“I'll bring this to him. Thanks for your help...”
Jimin patted the maknae's arm friendly, as if to say "you´re welcome" and said to Jungkook who turned to listen, with the door already open :
"Just be careful that Tae doesn’t realize that ..."
But they didn’t notice that Taehyung was already at the door except when he himself interrupted Jimin :
"So I don’t realize... what?"
Jungkook turned to Tae and glanced quickly back to Jimin, wondering if his evening could still be more complicated than it already was. Jimin, anticipating that their conversation could be long, said:
“You can’t talk in the hall. You both get in or ..."
“Chimchim, where did you go?" Tae asked, entering and closing the door.
Jungkook remembered that the package of strawberries wasn’t part of his arm and he lifted it up, explaining what it was:
“We went to buy strawberries.”
Jimin giggled. And Tae soon realized the story was not that simple. He looked at Jungkook's clothes.
"You're still with the clothes of the show ... And with this hoodie on top ... Is anyone going to give me an explanation or will I have to guess ?"
“Jungkook-ah, you explain.” Jimin said, sitting down in a nearby chair just to watch the scene.
JK tried to stick to a simple explanation:
"You've said that you wanted to eat strawberries... I found a fruit stall nearby and bought it.”
“You left ?” - Tae asked to be sure that was exactly what he understood – “You went out ... just to buy strawberries ??”
Jungkook's face was of whom was being rebuked by father. Jimin was watching the scene quitely, but Tae hadn’t forgotten what he had said:
"And you, Chimchim ? You didn’t know anything about it? Or you went along with him?”
Jimin and Jungkook exchange an accomplice look, but they haven’t set the same version of the facts, so Jimin decided to speak the truth in a concise way:
“JK said where he was going, but he didn’t wait for me ... So I went after him, with a security guard, Changwon, and ... I found him when he was already coming back.”
Tae felt that something was missing.
“And ... nothing much happened? You had no problem to buy it ?” He asked observing Kookie's reactions.
"No ... It was easy." Jungkook replied, once again proud of himself.
"No one approached you on the street?"
At that question, Taehyung noticed his two friends looked at each other.
"Ah ... did a fan recognize you? More than one?"
Jimin didn’t resist the interrogation and confessed :
“No ... Look ... I saw some weird guys around Kookie, but they left when I arrived ... Nothing happened ...”
Taehyung didn’t even let Jimin continue and started to talk hastily, showing irritation with what happened:
“Wait ... JK left alone, without knowing this area, without speaking the local language, without any of us, nor a security staff, he was surrounded by a strange group and I have to stay CALM, because, after all, nothing happened ???!"
“Tae ..." Jungkook tried to interrupt.
"Didn’t you think how dangerous it was? Did you forget that when we're on tour, we have to tell the managers where we are going, with who and what are we going to do? " Taehyung asked Jungkook, raising his voice.
Jungkook was already tired of being rebuked that night. And he didn't want to continue that discussion in front of Jimin. He handed the package to Tae, who holded it mechanically, and left the room slamming the door. Tae looked at Jimin.
“Don’t look at me. He is your boyfriend !” Chimchim said provocatively.
The word echoed within Taehyung for a few seconds . Boyfriend ! After all, was that what they were? Did he have to listen that word spoken by someone else to acknowledge that relationship within himself? It didn’t matter now, but talking to Jungkook did. Taehyung glanced at Jimin before leaving the room.
************************************************************************
Tae knocked on Jungkook's door that doesn't take too long to open, as if Kookie was expected him. Tae entered and closed the door. He placed the strawberries package on top of the dresser. The maknae watched him, silent. Tae tried to keep talking in a softer tone, approaching Jungkook and taking his hand:
"Hey ... Can you imagine how much it scared me to know about this story?"
Jungkook avoided looking into Tae's eyes, staring at the void, as if processing all the latest events.
"I want to hear your version of what really happened when you left ..." Tae said, putting his hand on the maknae's chin so he would not look away.
“It was supposed to ... surprise you ... Buying strawberries for you ... I know you would be happy and I knew I would be very fast and that it would work ...” - Jungkook started explaining himself, like a child who had been caught doing something wrong.
"Your exaggerated self-confidence in risky matters always bothers me.”
“But I got to buy and I was already coming back! ... But those four guys surrounded me and started talking to me in Spanish and I wasn’t understanding anything and the way they looked at me ... I started to realize what they wanted ... And ... yes, I was afraid. Even with the strength I know I have ... I would have few chances against the four ... And the way they looked at me ... I felt ...”
Tae realized that Kookie had been nervous just remembering what had happened, then he wrapped Kookie´s waist, bringing their faces closer. Jungkook kept talking, as if he needed to get it off his chest.
“I felt ... diminished... They looked at me with ... contempt ... but also with desire ...”
Tae, equally nervous at the thought of what might have happened, put his forehead on Jungkook's and asked :
"You’ll never ... you'll never do such a thing again anymore, will you?"
JK noded.
"No ... I want to hear your promise ..." Tae demanded.
"I promise ..." replied Jungkook, looking into Taehyung's eyes.
Tae sealed that promise with a kiss. Followed by another. And he hugged the maknae tightly, confessing :
“I cannot think of my life without you ...”
Jungkook, who usually has a hard time showing his emotions, seemed to have been shaken by the whole episode for he asked Tae, almost shyly:
"Do you sleep with me tonight ?"
It was everything Tae most wanted !! But the next day they would be called to go to the airport and it could be too risky ... JK tried to convince him:
“We'll be careful! Let's wake up earlier than planned and you'll go back to your room ...”
How to resist the appeal of the person you love the most ? How to say no to those lovely eyes?
"Is your bag ready? Because mine is done..." said Taehyung.
“No, you help me?”
"Um ... I have strawberries to eat ... I can’t help you ..." Tae teased, picking up the package of strawberries.
He opened the package and found beautiful and appetizing strawberries in pieces. He ate some, under the passionate gaze of Jungkook, and he recognized, not to disappoint the maknae:
“They're delicious ...”
Jungkook smiled widely. Tae also smiled and decided to agree to the maknae's proposal :
“Okay, I'm in... But on one condition ...”
Jungkook barely disguised a smile as he watched Tae eat the strawberries and say his condition.
"Let's go just to sleep," he said, "and let's wake up before the others ..."
Kookie was satisfied with the condition. Every moment next to Taehyung was too precious to be dismissed.
****************************************************************
Jungkook finds himself walking down a dark street. He's all dressed up, like he's going to perform at a show. He sees people far away and supposes to be his friends, who are wait for him in order to go somewhere. He's probably late. He knows they will tease him for keepting them waiting ... Jin is going to pat him on the neck ... Tae will say he waited for him until he could no longer. He decides to run. As he approaches the group, he realizes that they are not his friends. He stops suddenly and sees that people noticed him and start running towards him. He recognizes in the group the same boys who surrounded him near the hotel and is paralyzed. He wants to run in the opposite direction, run away, but his legs don’t obey him ... He feels unprotected, helpless ... Those voices ... The boys surround him and torment him with words he doesn't know and they intimidate him. They mock him, touch his clothes angrily, as if they were mad at him ... Jungkook tries to push them away with his arms, but this gesture only infuriates them and the maknae is quickly mastered. The leader, who had found his lips attractive, leaned on him to try to kiss him. JK wants to avoid this contact at all costs ...
Tae, who was asleep hugging Kookie, felt his agitation and loosed him to wake him, but he was frightened when Kookie shouted, still sleeping:
“NO !” and tried to push Taehyung away.
Tae shook him gently, worried:
“Kookie... Kookie, it's me ... Wake up ...”
Jungkook opened his eyes still confused, as if he didn’t know where he was. Tae calmed him down:
“Shhh, it was just a nightmare .... You're here with me ...”
The maknae softened his gaze, relieved, and hugs him, with his heart still racing. The nightmare seemed so real! Tae ran a hand down his back, in gentle movements, and asked, still holding him:
“Do you wanna tell me ?”
Jungkook took a deep breath, his heartbeat returning to normal. He slipped out of the embrace, but leaned his head on Tae's arm, which was resting on the pillow.
"It was a nightmare ... very real. I dreamed I was walking alone and I thought I had found you and the hyungs, but ... it was those guys from tonight ... And they wanted to get me ... And they could ... One of them was almost... But you woke me up ..."
“That will never happen again ... I'll take care of you."
The maknae gave a childlike smile. Kim Taehyung had the power to erase any trace of nightmare that a creature had. He had a light of his own that warded off all shadows. Wanting to go back to sleep, Tae pulled Kookie to him, hugged him from behind and said :
“Close your eyes, Koo ... Think you're safe here ... In my arms ... And nothing bad will happen to you ... No one will come to you ...”
And Tae began to hum quietly a song that he had already sung once, but this time as a lullaby to Kookie :
“Yes, I do... I believe
That one day I will be, where I was
Right there... right next to you
And it's hard, the days just seem so dark
The moon... and the stars... are nothing without you...”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The first day of the show in Brazil had come to an end and had been quite exciting. Even without mastering Korean, Brazilian fans were able to sing the songs and surprised Namjoon during his solo song "Reflection", by answering the line "I wish I could love myself" with the message "We love you" in unison. The feeling of affection and confidence generated by the presentation fueled the group's confidence for the next day's show and they returned to the hotel cheerful despite the tiredness.
Taehyung and Jungkook were more connected than ever, which already seemed normal to the group members and even to their staff. During performances, whenever he could, Tae looked at Jungkook to make sure the maknae was fine, because he had still fresh in his memory the image of the previous show in Chile.
Upon arriving at the hotel, after they had changed clothes, the two arranged dinner together in Tae's room. The energy of that night still pulsed in their hearts. They talked a lot about the show and Tae had been so enthusiastic about the warm welcome of Brazilian audience that decided to do a live.
"But you're gonna have to leave ..." says Tae, who had finished eating. Jungkook was not in the mood to leave Taehyung's room and wanted to stay to watch the broadcast. Chewing his last bit of food, he looks at Tae like a child who asks to stay up late.
"It's no use looking at me like that. You won’t be quiet and I won’t be able to focus on what I want to tell the fans ..."
“I promise to stay quiet, totally silent," Kookie argues. "I can stay there, beyond the reach of the camera," he says, pointing to a corner of the room.
Tae looks around as if studying the room, evaluating whether this would be possible or not. After all, he didn’t want to leave the maknae either, but he knew his friend very well and feared that he would somehow reveal his presence.
“How long is this live?” Kookie asks.
“ About 30 minutes."
“And have you thought about what you're going to say?"
"Introduce some songs, talk about our show ..." Tae replied, cleaning the table they had used and placing the food packs on a side bench.
"Let me stay, please ..." the maknae insisted, holding Taehyung from behind .
Jungkook definitely knew Kim Taehyung’s weaknesses. Tae rests the body in that embrace and gives in to the maknae's requests.
"But you have to be very VERY quiet !"
“Mute, totally mute.” confirms Jungkook, excited – “Yeah!” He exclaims, clapping his hands.
Kookie helps Tae to set the camera and to adjust the best angle, using his skills as videographer. Then he goes to the opposite side of the room and sits on the bed in front of Tae, leaning against the pillows.
Tae, wearing a black cap and sweater, starts the transmission. He waits a few minutes, but although he can’t see any viewers, he starts talking:
“No one is watching... Oh man. I´m serious. I don´t see any viewers.”
After one minute :
“But why do I see comments ? ... Oh man. Is this magic ? Hello ! I am Kim Taehyung of BTS. Today I´m here to listen to some classical music with you , guys.”
Tae was a bit nervous and had said they would listen to classical music that night, but in fact, his initial intention was to introduce a variety of songs. He selects a song from his playlist and explains:
“The title of this piece is Scherzino Mexicano by Manoel Ponce.”
Tae shakes his head following the music still with a tense smile that soon smoothes as he looks at JK, who was gesturing in the air, as if he were a maestro conducting an orchestra. Tae has to look away from Kookie. He looks to his left, then looks at the camera again.
“This piece is... How should I put it ?” He asks to himself.
Tae rests his face on his hand, looks at JK and thinks that letting him watch the live was not a good decision. Although Kookie was silent, Tae's eyes follows JK’s gestures and that could inevitably betray him in front of the camera.
“Whenever I listen to some classical music... And it´s not that I know a lot about the genre...”
He tries to focus on what he’s going to say, but his sweater seems to bother him.
“And I don´t even know how to appreciate this... But, you know, whenever I listen to some classical music... I feel quite relaxed ?”
The comment sounded like a question, as if Tae didn´t know if that was the best description for what he feels to hear this musical genre.“I think that´s how it´s for me...” - he says, nodding as if agreeing with himself.
He tilts his head to the side, stares at JK - who watches him with a passionate look - and, pulling his chair up to stand, he says:“This sweater is itchy, Please wait a second, guys...”Without focusing on the camera, but on what JK was doing, he says :“I will go change it.”He gets up to change his clothes, letting the music play loudly. When he turns, one can read on the back of the sweater a meaningful message, above the image of a tiger: "Blind for love". That clothe was of Tae's favorite brand: Gucci. And the message matched his present condition, for Tae was blind by his love for Jungkook.
Despite loud music, noises could be heard in the background. Jungkook sighs, as Tae begins to take off his sweater. Kookie doesn’t resist the sight of Tae’s bare chest. Rising quietly from the bed, he hugs Tae from behind and kisses his nape. Tae complains, but Jungkook barely contains a smile. Tae protests softly :
“No ... Go away then ...”But the order was in vain, for Kookie had been turned on by the sight of Tae's bare back and stole a kiss from him.“What are you doing ?? ! ” Tae murmurs, half panicked.Tae cannot resist and returns the kiss, forgetting for a moment the live. "That will not work," Tae says softly, yielding to Jungkook's kisses. He wanted to get him out, but he didn’t have the strength.JK notices Tae's anguish and doesn’t want to tease him beyond the limit, then he whispers in Tae’s ear:“Do you want me to leave ?”But Tae was already hopelessly absorbed in Jungkook's presence and he only asks, with pleading eyes and almost indistinct voice, for him to behave. Jungkook takes a deep breath, kisses Tae and agrees.Tae returns to his chair wearing an oversized, beige, Puma hoodie, and humming the music which was still playing. As he sits down, he stares at JK as if to remind him to behave. Turns to the mirror on his right and pulls up the hoodie."What’s this brand ?" He asks innocently, taking the opportunity to clearly and purposefully display the Puma brand for the camera, after all it was an official sponsor of the group.
Jungkook’s had turned him on, and now he could only think of the maknae's kisses, but he tried to resume the conversation:“What are you guys doing right now ?”Tae looks at his cell phone to check the time.“It's 11:15 a.m. There must be 11:50 in Korea ... I really wanted to see you, guys ! But we are in South America! You guys have been waiting for a long time, right?”Tae asked the question looking at JK and not at the camera, as if to say that he would still have to wait a little longer for them to be together. The maknae's kisses had aroused his desire, but now he would have to carry on the transmission.“That´s why were going to have some fun ! Oh that´s the end of the piece... And I´ll play another one. ”Tae looks for songs in his playlist with pouting lips. Jungkook observes him from distance thinking it was charming. He wanted to bite those lips and he was looking at Tae like a predator watching his prey.
“This is...”Tae begins to hum along with the song and imitates the gestures of someone who plays a string instrument. He does this by looking at JK, who imitated his gestures. “We’ll have a concert here in Brazil tomorrow. Please cheer us on !” - Tae says, looking at the camera and shaking his head, as if thanking everyone in advance.Then, looking to the left and to the right, as if searching for something that JK had signaled to him, he disguises his intention and says: “Ah I started exercising ! I started today...” - He says, glancing at Kookie, who had been the cause of his sudden motivation to practice exercises – “But please pretend that I started right when the tour started. I´m trying my best.” JK smiled at the statement, for he knew there was a implicit confession of admiration for all that concerned him. “What exercises ? It´s obviously...” - and saying that, he makes the gesture of those who are working their biceps, flexing their arms as if holding dumbbells.Tae reads the comment "Please do not diet" and responds : “I´ll never go on a diet. I´m planning to bulk up.” - saying that, he rests his chin on his hands, in a cute way – “Oh Oh Oh Oh Please, don´t leave me even if we gain weight, everyone. Please love and support our beautiful chubby faces... We wil be heavier... – he says, looking at JK- “And we will be more mature...” He turns his look to the camera again because the admiration in Kookie's eyes makes him somehow embarrassed. “After the tour is over...” – he says looking at JK again – “I bet you guys say : “You and Jungkook are looking a little soft...” Tae says this like someone who is making a veiled gossip, with his hand close to the mouth “I bet you guys will say that after we return. So, please, look forward to us. We will gain some weight and return to you soon.”Tae says the last sentence, stretching his hand several times forward, toward the camera, half smiling, but he gets more serious when he looks at JK in the end. He turns his gaze to his cell phone and talks about the song that starts playing. “This song... I don´t know what the piece is called. I just love listening to it. It´s so good that I even forgot the title...”In fact, JK was taking away his concentration, so Tae needs to check the title of the song in the playlist:“ Pa-aa-artita No 3 in EBWV 1006 ... Bach ? Is it Bach ? Gavotte... I don´t know. Anyway... I accidentally found out this piece. It´s a really great piece.”He reads a comment about the volume, which he had left a bit high, as a precaution, to suppress any noise Kookie might make:“You can´t hear me talk because the music is too loud ? Sorry about that. I got it.”He selects another song again. “Hum... Guys...”He finds the music he wants and, this time, no more a classical one. He scratches the back of his head with his index finger and looks at JK, who claps his hands silently , since he wasn’t a fan of classical music. Tae thinks to himself: "This live is gonna suck ..."“I was going to play something else, but it skipped to this piece. This song is by Jungkey... and it´s called “Today”. And it´s sung by DOKO. I love the song.”- He says, singing along with the music.“naccseon oneul gateun bam oraenmanine
an meokdeon sul myeot jangwa dasi mannan neo
pogeunhan sopa wie maju anjeumyeon
naneun tto naneun tto
achime nun tteo boni dasi honjane...”“Let´s go...”Tae use his hand as a microphone and starts huming, following the lyrics on his cell phone and kinda closing his eyes, until he rests on his chair, with his arms folded and eyes closed. Then he sits properly, looks at JK, but turns to the camera and talks about the pimple on his face ...“Oh, right... I´ll introduce my new friend...” – he says, pointing to his left cheek – “We met yesyerday. I think this one is going to stay with me for a long time.” He looks at JK and there is an almost imperceptible smile on his face. He turns to the phone and says about the song:“Honestly, I knew Jungkey was going to make it someday.” - He raises his thumbs in approval.- “His new song...” - ... - He says, making a gesture of who loves that song. He looks at his cell phone and shakes his arms following music. -...” it´s a great song.”Tae is enjoying the music so much !“It's his song that I like the most. The melody line ... It really suits me.”He rests his chin on his elbows and, with his fingers, stretches the corners of his eyes, making a cute face ... He smiles. Then he gots serious, when he looks at JK, who wanted to pick something inside the closet, which would eventually make a noise. Tae looks at the camera and stands up as if to take some action, but as Kookie understands the message, he sits back and just takes off his beanie and asks :“I look better without the beanie ?”He sits without his beanie, his bangs half untidy. He smiles, looking at JK, then he looks at the camera and asks :“Do you still love me ?”He repeats the question in a more comical way and make broad gestures with the arms. Kookie smiles, adoring everything Tae does. Tae sings another piece of music and then says :“I have another one. I’ve just sang a line earlier. This is my favorite song. I hope you guys will listen to it a lot.” ‘Spine Breaker’ is now playing and Tae follows it with gestures. He pulls the hood he was wearing and his face goes partially covered. He pulls the hood down again and keeps on following the music with gestures while reading the lyrics on his phone. He makes rap moves and sings along with Suga's voice, remembering what they filmed at the hotel in Mexico. He and Jungkook had so much fun! Jungkook seems to have the same fond memories for he was also dancing while Tae was singing.At the chorus part, Tae becomes even more excited and sings:
“oh, wow gibun joha geolchyeoboneun neoui dirty clothes
neon mwonga dareun rockin, rollin, swaggin, swagger, wrong!
dodaeche wae irae, michyeosseo baby
geuge neoui mameul joyeobeoril geoya, dirty clothes” “Guys... Guys ? Please don´t be a spine breaker...”Tae keeps on singing and, distracted by his cell phone, he doesn’t notice JK's moves. The maknae dances in front of him and lets unintentionally the lamplight reflect on the screen of his own cell phone, which was in his hand while dancing. The light also reflects on the wall behind Tae. Tae gets the phone and finds another song: “Personally, I love this part... I love this part...” It starts playing the cheerful rhythm of 'Other: Wings'. “Please all sing along when Hoseok sings this part, guys... Oh it´s comign up... This is such an epic sounding part. Please listen carefully. You guys must listen carefully. Please don´t sing along...” Tae puts the cell phone close to the microphone so that the sound comes out loud in the video. “Yes, that's it ! This is my favorite song! Wait, because the part I want has not yet arrived ...” Tae gestures with his hands, following the music. He pays attention to hear his favorite part.
“Oh, it´s not coming up... Yes, it´s coming up... Check out Jimin´s improvisation ! Please listen carefully ! This is awesome, guys ! And that was the best part of the song ! The end !” Saying this, he stops the music and looks for another. “I will recomend another song for you, guys.” He swipes his finger across the playlist and says: “If you listen carefully to some of our lesser-known songs , each of them has its own character. I wanted to play the song “Spine Breaker” for those people who don´t know who I am.” Tae says this looking at the phone, giving a little smile of satisfaction and shaking his head. “Ah... What do you guys want to listen to ‘Cypher’ ? Nope...We will sing the rest of the songs later in the concert. Please wait for us a little longer.” Tae seems to find something funny on his cell phone because he laughs. Then he gets serious and says: “This one isn’t a kpop song...”The song "Lay me down" by Sam Smith starts playing and Tae sings along swaying himself from one side to the other. When he sings the line "Your touch, your skin, where do I begin", Tae looks discreetly at JK ... He closes his eyes, with his head back as if he was dreaming and says, looking at JK and not at the camera: “It´s my favorite Sam Smith’s song.” He sings the line "Can I lay by your side?", and rests his body in his chair, with his head back and pretends to cry, then sits up straight still singing "next to yoooouuuu" and picks up his cell phone to look for more songs . “I wanted to recomend this song. Oh... There´s one more. Okay... I´ll play it right after this one is over. I will play two more songs and end the broadcast.” He makes the V signal with his hand, indicating two songs. The information was also for JK to know that he was about to end the live. “... toniiiiight .. Come on, Sam Smith! That part is great now, guys. ‘I'm missing you, I'm missing you like craaaazy’ ..." Tae sings that part in a high pitched tone, rocking back and forth in the chair. He feels the truth of the song deep in his heart. The message had so much to do with what he and Jungkook were living lately... “Please, listen carefully, guys...”“You told me not to cry when you were gone
But the feeling's overwhelming, it's much too strong...” Tae keeps on swinging with open arms from side to side.“Can I lay by your side? Next to you, you ...” Tae puts his palm right in front of the camera and suddenly asks, withdrawing his hand and looking at the camera: “Oh Do you want to read my palm lines ? Check it out.” He places the open palm in front of the camera again. “I have a letter “M” on my palms... And the other one !” Tae stays in that position for a few seconds, singing, then he switches to the other hand and looks at JK. He reads a comment on the screen and agrees : “Huh ? It´s an awesome song. There are two songs that I´ll play as my recommendations. And some of our Army fans have just mentioned one of the singers in the comment section.” Tae dances a little, in the chair, but he is restless, seeing what Kookie is doing. He tries to focus on the camera. Those seemed like the longest minutes of his life. “Most of these songs are my own favorites...” He reads a comment, finds it funny and smiles : “You are a genius if have a letter “M” on your palm ?” He gives a smile but rolls his eyes, not by the comment, but by what JK was doing. Kookie was lying on the bed, using one of the pillows as if it was Tae: he hugged and kissed it, provocatively, looking at V. Tae stops speaking in the middle of the sentence and looks at JK, trying to control himself and to disguise his interest, but the movement he makes with his tongue inside his mouth betrays him. Tae swallows dryly, runs his tongue over his lips and looks down at his cell phone, suddenly remembering that he's live transmission... The line "Lay me by your side" was playing again and Tae sings along in falsetto, eyes closed and arms open, throwing his head back. “Ah, JK, you are kiling me !! ...” Tae thinks. “Let´s go, Sam Smith !” Tae suddenly remembers Jungkook's playlist and his comments about one special singer: “Ah I also like Charlie Puth !... But the last two songs which I´ll play, will be closer to my taste.” When he says this, it’s evident he had mentioned Charlie Puth exclusively to please Jungkook. Tae swipes his finger across the phone to choose the next song. “The second song is... “Fool for you” by Zayn. I´ve recently found out about the song , but I like it a lot.” - Tae gives JK a meaningful look and turns his eyes to the camera. How those lyrics match the current status of their relationship ! Tae can't stop thinking about it ! “This love is tainted
I need you and I hate it
You're caught between a dream and a movie scene
In a way, you know what I mean
When the darts just miss, I just can't resist it
Cause I'm a fool for you and the things you do
I'm a fool for you and the things,
the things you do
the things you do...”
“You know, guys...”Tae moves in the chair from side to side as if something bothers him. In his heart, he wanted to be able to confess to the fans everything that was happening, everything he was feeling, but his rational part brought him back to reality. Many things he and Jungkook would like to disclose would have serious consequences to his life and to the whole group. “I´ll take a sip of water...” He reaches for the water bottle. “It´s a little hard to talk...” He drinks two sips of water and starts singing the music, swinging his arms, as he had done with the previous song. He uses his hand as microphone and sings with his eyes closed. He just feels the music and avoids looking at Jungkook, because in fact the message of the song was for him.“I'm a fool for you and the things,
the things you do
the things you do...” He was about to say something after looking at the camera, but he looked at JK and pressed his lips into a tense smile. Then he rests his chin on his right hand and he softs his gaze. He talks sometimes looking at the camera sometimes at JK. A comment about Ed Sheeran appears on the screen and Tae responds: "Shape of You" ... I love Ed Sheeran ! Personally, I really like Ed Sheeran. There was a song from him in the movie "Bridget Jones's Baby." I loved it.” He glances at the camera and raises both eyebrows , then keeps on singing :“I´m a fool for you... And the things you doooo...”He tilts his head to the right and rests his face on the palm of his hand. He tries to read a comment. Then he looks at JK. He rests his chin on both palms and plays with the corner of his eyes, using his pinky fingers. The song is ending, so he picks up his phone to select the last one.
“The last song is...”Zayn's song was coming to an end and Tae hummed as he looked at his cell phone.“I hope Jungkook learns how to play the drums for this song...” - Tae says this, looking at the camera and then looking back to JK. He makes gestures and noises as if he was playing drums.The song ends and he says, smiling in a cute way to the camera:“The last song of the night is... I´ve recomended this song before.” Tae shows his phone screen to the camera.“Versace on the floor”. It´s one of my favorite songs of all time !”Tae says this showing the screen to the camera, but looking at JK. When he notices that he was showing the image of the playlist and not the specific one of the song, he says:“Oh, this isn´t it...”He finds the right image and selects the song.“Let's take our time tonight, girl
Above us all the stars are watchin'
There's no place I'd rather be in this world
Your eyes are where I'm lost in
Underneath the chandelier
We're dancin' all alone
There's no reason to hide
What we're feelin' inside
Right now...” Tae reads a comment and responds: “A cover song ? ... No, I don´t have any.” He smiles, holding out his hand as if to reiterate that he didn’t even have any cover song on his playlist.
“It´s because,,, You know...” - He answers, putting his chin in his hands, as if he were doing aygo – “I personally...”Without finishing what he was going to say , as if he had just remembered something, he raises his right finger to the camera and says: “Oh... What as that... I wrote the melody to “Spring Day”. Do you guys want to hear it ?”He places his right hand cupped in the ear as if he wanted to hear the audience. He repeats the question, in a cute way, making the same gesture with his left hand."Do you want to hear it?" Do you want to listen? I'll post it after this song is over ...”Tae follows the song, swinging his arms back and forth once more. When he sits down on the chair, his movement ends up displacing the camera and revealing what's on the bench behind him, on the right: two mugs and two ramen jars. Tae gets scared and hurries to straighten the camera. He exclaims :“Oh no !...”He tries to set it in the same position it was. “I was so...”He thinks he had managed to fix it and he giggles nervously ... "Eheheh ..." But the camera leans back to the right ... JK gets tense watching the whole scene. He wants to be able to help, but he knows he had to be quiet. Tae tries to stay calm otherwise everything would be lost...
“There we go...”Tae glances to the right to observe what the camera might have revealed ... He thinks what could be deduced from what was seen. He looks to the left as well. The maknae, who had stood, followed Tae's movements, also worried about what might have been revealed. Tae picks up the water bottle on the table and opens the lid, humming a song to pretend tranquility.“Guys, let´s listen to the song...”Tae leans in the chair to drink water. He was still a bit nervous so when he goes to put the bottle back on the table, he misses and it almost falls. He closes his eyes to hear the music and also to calm down. He turns his face to the camera and to JK, since this time they were in the same direction, and he smiles lovingly as if to say: "Don't worry. It's all right." “My hair is damaged ? It´s just that I didn´t blow-dry my hair . That´s all. And I agree that it´s kinda annoying...”Tae sits back in the chair, relaxed, leaning his head back, humming the music, sideways to the camera, then he looks ahead when the song speaks "Dance." He decides to stand and dance, swinging his hips, then he pulls back the chair to sit down again and he says, referring to another comment:“Dancing in the rain ? Something like this ?”He picks up the water bottle, takes a sip and sings, using the bottle as microphone , as he usually does when he and Jungkook have fun singing together.“It´s warming up
Can you feel it ?
It´s warming up
Can you feel it ?Oh seems like you´re ready for more, more, more
Let´s just kiss ‘til we´re naked
Oooh, Versace on the floor
Hey baby...”Tae gets excited and sings with his eyes closed. He doesn't see that the camera leaves its place again and shows once more the bench. When he opens his eyes, he notices it and fixs its position, but this time without showing so much nervousness. He doesn't care anymore: "Ah fuck..." He looks to the left and then he reads another question on the screen :“Where are my glasses ? I don’t wear them because of you guys ... I don’t wear them on the set ...”He looks at JK who makes an expression indicating that he likes when Tae wears glasses."Do you want me to put them on?"The music is ending and he gets up to get his glasses."After the other members saw me with glasses on , they were saying that ..."He tries to remember what his friends said, as he wipes his glasses with the tip of his coat, but feeling JK's affectionate look makes him lose the concentration."Oh, what did they say?" Oh come on...” He says to himself.He decides to get a tissue to wipe the glasses. The music ends and another was going to start, but he pauses the app, holds the tissue and says :“What was it...”He sits back in front of the camera and puts his glasses on . Suddenly he looks at JK and lets out a sigh of disapproval of what the other was doing. In fact, Jungkook, restless, was just sending kisses to him, but that made Taehyung loose his focus, so he looks back at his cell phone as if to say "there's nothing I can do now, but just you wait ..." Looking for a song, he licks his lips and says, looking at the camera:“I can really see well, guys... Oh, this song... I said I was going to put this ... Um, um ... This is it. Let's hear ... I wrote the chorus of this song ...” - saying that, he giggles – “Huhahahaha ...”He looks at the phone and starts to sing another song, now a Japanese one whose meaning of the lyrics was: "Its time to say goodbye now ... / See you next time ..."“I really need to go now, guys ... See you later ... What´s a good farewell song ?” He sighs. "This is for you guys. You see ? I´m a nice guy...”His finger bumps into a song that begins to play.
“Wait a second, this is not the song. After watching the movie “Bridget Jone´s baby”, if I learned anything after watching the movie...”Tae finds the song he wants : "All by myself," by Celine Dion, the chorus part. He picks up the water bottle again to use it as his microphone, making passionate gestures of someone who sings the song with all his heart. “All by myself, anymoooooooooore”Tae sings spreading out his arms and kicking the air with his legs, trying to impersonate the singer, screaming at the top of his lungs. ... He gets so excited that even takes off his glasses. He keeps on gesturing passionately until he turns to the camera and says:“I´m going. Bye bye...”Tae turns everything off and relaxes his body in the chair, letting out a sigh of relief. Then he looks at JK who was laughing nervously."I think it was the worst live of my life ..." Tae says looking at JK.Kookie, who is in bed sitting over his knees and hugging a pillow, says :“When the camera tilted over ... I thought it was going to turn to this side ...”
“It was tense ...
Tae gets up and goes to Jungkook. He throws himself on the bed next to his friend and spreads his arms as if exhausted. Kookie laughed and got so distracted by Taehyung´s cuteness that he didn't expect Tae to take the pillow out of his hands so quickly.
"You ... deserve ... to be ... punished !" Tae says, striking JK with the pillow.
In the final blow, however, Kookie grabs the pillow. Tae, with the agility of a feline, turns around, reaches for another pillow, and asks, laughing and squeezing his eyes, pretending a menacing tone:
“It's war ?”
“Fighting !!” Jungkook responds with a charming smile and starts striking Tae, who strikes back.
The two laugh at the blows that randomly hit one another until they fall tiredly, side by side, on the bed.
"Do you know what that reminds me ?" Tae asks, still gasping.
"No ..." Kookie says, turning to face Tae.
Taehyung leans on his elbows and turns to JK to answer:
"What I wanted to do half an hour ago ..."
The fatal connection between their eyes makes one practically read the other's thoughts. Jungkook is attracted by Tae's eyes as if they were a great magnet. Tae has no need to say anything, he just approaches Jungkook, looks at the perfect lips that await him and kiss them softly. This triggers a series of sensations in both. Tae's kisses get more intense and both feel the arousal coursing through their bodies like an electric discharge.
"Take it out ..." orders Jungkook grasping Tae's hoodie to pull it out. Tae smiles and comments:
“So bossy ...”
Jungkook throws the hoodie on the floor. Now he could contemplate Taehyung's chest without any obstacle. Kookie strokes Tae's nipples, teasing him. In turn, Taehyung raises Kookie´s shirt , revealing his well sculpted abdomen. After the shirt passes over Kookie´s head, Tae kisses Jungkook´s lips greedily, inducing him to open his mouth so that he could lick inside. A shiver runs through the maknae's body with each kiss, and he groans at the touch of Taehyung's tongue against his. Tae takes a moment to contemplate Jungkook’s face and his expression of desire, the look of who needed him as if he needed air to breathe ... Without taking his eyes from Kookie's face, Tae runs his hand over the bulge formed in the maknae’s sweatpants, giving him a slight squeeze, and enjoys the pleasure of hearing JK moan again. Tae presses his hand against JK's bulge, rubbing and scrubbing, a delicious rub that was almost uncomfortable, but pleasurable enough to supress all other thoughts from Jungkook's mind. Tae wants Jungkook to take the initiative this time so he teases him to make him do it. JK's breathing gets more and more accelerated. He craves for skin contact and reaches into his waistband to lower it, exposing his erect, throbbing member. The sight of Jungkook's penis was too dazzling for Tae to manage, so he takes off Kookie’s last clothes and leaves him completely naked.
"Oh ... splendid ..." Tae whispers, admiring JK’s body.
Jungkook usually would be embarrassed by the compliment, but he took so much pleasure of being at Tae's side that he could only think of touching him as well.
"Let's balance things out," Kookie says, putting his hands on the waistband of Tae's pants.
Jungkook slides his hands under Taehyung's pants and rests them on his buttocks, giving him a slight squeeze. This causes Tae to writhe with pleasure.
"Take it off ..." commanded Jungkook again, looking into Tae's eyes.
Tae was loving Jungkook 's authoritative side. New characteristics are always welcome. Taehyung takes away the rest of his clothes. When the two become so, so intimately exposed, the level of connection between them reaches its maximum. Tae gives in to his urge to kiss Jungkook's nipples, as the maknae had once done to him. The delicious sensation had been in Taehyung's memory and he wanted Kookie felt the same. He kisses the nipples slowly, licks around them gently, and sucks on it, increasing pressure and gently biting it. He raises his head to look at the maknae's face. The sight was like the doors of paradise. The maknae was biting his lips, drawing the air hard, groaning at every touch of Tae's tongue on his body. In fact, his body began to tremble slightly.
“Fuck ... you're killing me ...”
Tae laughs. JK never curses. He must have been getting really out of control. That dominant-dominated switch game was showing extremely pleasurable to both of them.
"Come here ..." Jungkook said, pulling Tae close to him.
Jungkook hugs Tae and whispers in his ear, begging:
“I can't stand it anymore...”
Taehyung smiles, for his condition was the same. Then he lets himself be led by Jungkook, who hugs him from behind, with his penis fit between Tae´s legs just below his buttocks. Tae bites his lips, anticipating the surge of pleasure that was approaching. The maknae slides his hands over Tae's hips, takes his penis and starts stroking him. Jungkook thrusts his hips back and forth in a frantic movement and Tae puts his hands over JK's , but letting him conduce all the moves. “There must be no greater pleasure on Earth, my God” Tae thinks.
Tae feels like he was before a precipice. A kind of lethal plunge. A pleasurable terror. A surge of pleasure emanating from every bit of his body. Tae could hear himself moaning and perhaps he would be embarrassed afterwards with this memory, but now he could only think of Jungkook forcing himself insistently against him and taking pleasure to himself from his body . And that sensation disassembles him inside out, as if it made him ethereal, fluid, as if he was definitely incorporated into Jungkook's organism. Tae wants to keep his lips shut, but the maknae's thrusts are vigorous and his body claims for oxygen.
"... faster ...please... faster..." Tae murmurs, so that the maknae knows he is about to cum.
Tae´s groans and breathing become more and more audible and Jungkook can't avoid expressing what was in his mind. He whispers in Taehyung´s ear :
“Cum in me ... My Tae ...”
That last command was enough for Taehyung to burst out with happiness into an unforgettable orgasm, which led Jungkook to cum soon after. The body of the two arching and shuddering together in delightful synchrony.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Describing the happiness of those who have found the right person to live the best years of their lives is a delicate matter. It’s a feeling that is born in the heart and reaches the eyes, radiating an aura around the person. It ‘s a special happiness that catch the others´ attention. No matter how much one tries to disguise it, it manifests itself in the smallest details: the way one looks at the other when their eyes met; the way one addresses the other, the voice tone one uses with the other. Even the lightly touch of any part of the body is enough to refer to some important moment, some body memory. Being aware of this and being able to control all these feelings are different things. In addition, these tasks are more easily performed by an individual with greater emotional maturity. Jeon Jungkook was still a beginner on matter of feelings. And Kim Taehyung was not exactly an expert either. It was expected they both made some slips as they plunged into the deep, unknown ocean called Love.
The live they've made in Brazil that night had bad consequences for the duo. Both were called by the managers who observe them for a serious conversation. The hashtag ‘Taekook’ trended on social networks for days . To prevent the possibility of speculation, that live ended up being restricted to Channel Plus, which is the paid content of the program. Thus, according to the agency, at least the access to the live would be much smaller and, over time, they believe that it would be forgotten. As a consequence for them, their interactions on stage became much more limited and they were required to increase the interaction with the other members of the group.
After the tour in America, the group returned home to begin the first part of the Asian tour. The day after their return, they were all invited to a meeting that would be about the vacation, a leisure that was still work, as they would be filming Bon Voyage third season, this time in Hawaii. Even with the commitment to filming, the group was excited about the prospect of a little more relaxation and renewed strength for the rest of the tour.
They were all seated around a large table in the outer area of Bang Shi Hyuk’s house, under a cozy sun. Namjoon in the center, with the maknae line on one side and the hyungs on the other. That part of the meeting was being recorded for a future documentary about the group.
"Please tell us how you feel." - asked the film director - "Please, Suga hyung, tell me how you felt.
The scenes from the last performance in the United States came to everyone´s mind.
“ I'm happy because we finished well.” - Suga commented.
“The fans didn’t know how to speak Korean, but they sang along with us.” Said Jin, astonished.
“I feel the same way. We receive a lot of positive energy from them.” Said Hoseok.
“The fans were passionate in South America” - added Namjoon –“ I think it's a miracle we had our own show in the USA.”
“ I learned a lot on this tour.” - said Jimin, who was sitting next to Kookie – “And I really amused myself.”
Jungkook and Taehyung, who were sitting side by side, taking advantage of the laid-back atmosphere of the meeting, expressed a firm desire to learn English.
"As the others said, I had so much fun on this tour. And ... I also decided to study more English.” Said the maknae, determined.
“English?” Hoseok joked.
“Yes.” Kookie replied. “Study a lot.”
“ Study hard.” Said Namjoon.
Taehyung, taking advantage of the opportunity, spoke, while Kookie admired him with passionate eyes:
“I had a lot of hope in the United States ...”
“Hope?” Interrupted Hoseok.
"Expectations, I mean. - corrected Tae, who was already a little distracted by the maknae 's physical proximity. He tried to concentrate more, since Kookie decided to play with a lock of hair that was out of his beanie – “Because if I practice English in the United States, I think I could make more progress than I would have in Korea. But it's a long way to go .... " - he said, looking at Jungkook, seeking support.- "The language barrier is not easy, it's too big.”
Everyone was looking at the pair, who seemed to share the decision to study English, as if the subject was a point that had already been much discussed between the two. In fact, the idea of "hope" was really in Taehyung's mind. Ever since he realized that in the United States somehow they might have some hope of living together.
"Even though I speak a 'broken' English, our fans understood and I was happy!" Tae said, always resting his gaze on Jungkook, as if seeking support for all his words.
The director proceed with the meeting by talking about its real motive: the presentation of the travel plan for the next vacation trip. Everyone was already aware that it would be for Hawaii, but they still pretended to be somewhat surprised, because in fact, the details of the choice were about to be revealed.
“Amazing !”
“Wow ! Hawaii !” - Exclaimed Jin.
“Hawaii !! Ah, my first time in 24 years!” Said Hoseok.
Everyone commented that it would be the first time for all of them.
"We've never been to where YOU've never been..." Yoongi teased.
"We're all in the same boat, remember?" Said Namjoon.
The director then explained that the choice of location had come from conversations that the production team had had with them about where they would like to travel to, if they had a vacation time together. And everyone remembered that one place they all mentioned at the time had been Hawaii.
“ I heard a lot of good things about Hawaii, but I really can not imagine what it's like to be there!” Said Yoongi, suddenly very excited.
The director gave them a tourist folder about the place and went on to describe some details of the trip. They would have the rest of the day to pack, since the trip would be the next day.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
A power supply failure for that part of the island would delay morning shooting that day. Everyone preferred to rest a little more instead of jumping out of bed anytime soon. Everyone but someone so energetic that he could hardly wait to use his new camera. He intended to go out and explore the surroundings where they were based. Jungkook wasn't luck in the room division game : he lost and ended sleeping in the living room, he didn't have a proper room, and that bothered him. He couldn't, in any case, stay rolling in bed till late, as the others were doing, since he didn't have a bed. So taking advantage of the little free time that had come up to film what interested him seemed a good idea. Namjoon, who shared room with Taehyung, gets up early too and crosses the living room complaining:
“Taehyung, even though I gave you a pillow for you to hug, you didn't let me sleep ...”
Jungkook, who was packing the bag with the camera , listens to the comment and smiles to himself. He'd love to be in Namjoon's shoes and certainly wouldn't be complaining at this time of morning and not even thinking about taking pictures of nature ...
Namjoon curls up on the huge porch sofa with a book on his lap. Jungkook takes advantage of Tae being alone in the room and goes to him. He finds him wrapped in the duvet, with tousled hair and eyes almost closing again. He sits next to Tae, who gets suddenly awake with the presence of the beloved.
"Good morning, sleeping beauty ..." Kookie jokes.
Taehyung smiles drowsy, notices the maknae's clothes and asks :
“Are you going out ?”
“I´m gonna take a walk around right here and enjoy there‘s no film crew yet ... It's such a rest, you know ?”
“I know... Why do you think everyone is still sleeping?” Said Taehyung, barely containing a yawn.
Jungkook looks toward the half-open door to see if Namjoon or any of the others are nearby.
“What ?” Asked Taehyung.
“This ..." Kookie replied, leaning over to kiss Taehyung on the lips.
Tae had been taken aback but responded eagerly to the kiss. After all, that year was so hard for both of them! They were suffering so much patrol from their managers and staff, as well as the subtle vigilance of the hyungs, which were aware of the repercussion the live made in Brazil got, that any moment they could have alone was very precious to both of them.
"Ah ... stay ... don't go ..." Tae complained, wrapping Kookie's neck.
Jungkook smiled, his forehead against Tae's.
“You know we can’t ... This kiss was to quench the thirst. I miss us...”
Tae looks into Kookie's eyes and confesses:
“I feel the same.”
They hear movement in the living room and Jungkook gets out of bed.
“I'm going... but I won't be long.”
“Take your cell phone with you... We may need to talk to you. “
Kookie takes the phone from his pocket and shows it to Tae.
“I do, but you wanna know? It's almost discharged! I forgot to put it to charge and with this power outage ...”
“Take mine ...”
Taehyung reaches over to catch his cell phone on the bedside table. Both note Tae's cell phone was also low on charge.
“Let it... I'm gonna turn mine off a bit to save power. No problem.”
Tae holds Kookie's hand.
“Be careful.”
The maknae smiles and makes the pinky promise gesture on Taehyung's hand. He leaves the room silently. Taehyung watches him walk away and sighs. The kiss had triggered not only his memories but his desire as well. Now he had an uncomfortable erection for company. He tries to settle down to keep sleeping and not think about the maknae.
Jungkook sneaks out the door that has no connection to the porch, as he doesn't want to wake Namjoon, who has fallen asleep while reading. He checks the camera and is happy to realize the battery was fully charged. He walks the path that surrounds the house and goes away a little, following the direction the guide had signaled as a trail to reach the upper part of the ground. The landscape was very beautiful and Kookie didn't want to miss the opportunity to register it. Exotic plants, lush foliage and diverse sounds made up the picture of nature at that time of morning. A magnificent butterfly passes before his eyes and seems to invite him for a walk. It rests on a leaf and lightly flaps its diaphanous wings. As a good director, Jungkook doesn't want to lose any movement and goes quietly recording, almost without breathing so as not to frighten the delicate creature. The butterflie takes off and he follows it, focused on his task. Gradually the house disappears from his view once Kookie goes deeper and deeper into the woods. He relies on his good sense of inner guidance to return smoothly. The butterfly seems to want to show him the beauties of the path : nooks of intense greenness forming unique landscape compositions.
"That's so beautiful !" Kookie mutters to himself.
There's a noise from a nearby stream. He didn't remember the guide talking about it. Maybe it was a waterfall. He decides to look for where the sound was coming from. That's when he notices that he was already on a higher part of the ground and couldn't even see the house or its more familiar surroundings.
"Ah... that's where I have to go when I get back. That´s easy.” He thought to himself.
He can see a waterfall not far from where he was. He decides to approach. He wants to film it and experience its waters. The terrain gets wetter as it approaches the small waterfall and the noise of the water also becomes more audible, standing out above other outside noises. There are a number of rocks surrounding the bank of the stream that had formed below the waterfall.
“I need to film this.” He says turning the camera back on and pointing it at the source of those crystal clear waters.
He walks slowly forward, trying to find the best angle for the shoot. There is no gap between a set of rocks and the damp ground. The gap, mostly covered by undergrowth, looked like a nature trap and was actually a deep hole in the ground, like an abandoned pit or something. A second after finding what he mentally called 'the perfect angle to shoot', Jungkook steps on that treacherous gap and plummets into the darkness of the pit, falling on his back into the damp ground and banging his head on a rock. Without understanding what had happened, he still glimpses the distant clarity before his eyes shut down.
*************************************
Park Jimin wouldn't have woke up if his stomach hadn't been rumbling. The day was already bright enough, but the sun that was expected to help them accomplish their schedule had not appeared. In fact, rain clouds started gathering in the sky. That day would definitely be wiped out of the show, since everything was going wrong. Their schedule would be behind one day, which didn't please to production, but in the final result, Armys wouldn't even notice, due to the editions that the program suffered. Jimin goes brush his teeth still sleepy. He notices Yoongi was sleeping with his arms locked in the middle of his legs, as usual. Affectionate, Jimin pulls a blanket over his mate.
Hoseok was already in the kitchen looking for something for them to eat. Since he shared room with Jin, he had called him to help with the task. Relying on Seokjin's culinary skills is always a blessing.
“Oh, how great ! The power is back!” Exclaimed Jin.
Hoseok gets excited and goes find Namjoon, entering the room where Tae was sleeping.
“Hey ... Has Namjoon already woken up? And I didn't even see?”
He leaves the room and looks for the leader until he finds him sleeping on the porch. Hobi laughs, wondering what should have happened.
Jimin enters the living room, picks a banana from the fruit bowl and sits on the couch. He looks around and asks Jin:
“Have you seen Jungkook?”
“He wasn't in the room when we woke up. He must be out there taking pictures or filming... He likes to take pictures of dawn, right?”
Namjoon comes from the porch along with Hoseok and says:
“Good morning, guys ! I'll take a shower before eating...”
“When you came to sleep on the porch, did you see Jungkook? Was he in the room?” Jimin asked, a tinge of worry disturbing his thoughts.
“Oh, he was. He was messing with the new camera and I think he was going out to take some pictures or film, I don't know.”
Jin announces:
“The food is ready , guys!”
Yoongi had already woken up and also joins them in the room. Jimin will wake up Tae. When he enters the room, he realizes that his friend must be dreaming of something, because he was moving, trying to get rid of the covers.
"TaeTae ..." Jimin called, touching his shoulder.
Taehyung wakes up scared. He opens his eyes and looks around, as if searching for something or someone ...
“Kookie is back ?” He asked immediately, even before Jimin said anything to him.
“Are you alright ? You were having a nightmare, right?”
Taehyung runs his hand through his rumpled hair and rubs his eyes. He leans back on the pillow, suddenly relieved that he is no longer sleeping.
“Nightmare ... yes ... yeah ...” - then repeats the question – “JK went out to take pictures. Is he back yet? “
“No. I didn't see him outside either ...”
Taehyung gets out of bed. His nightmare seemed suddenly real. He goes to the living room, followed by Jimin.
"Hey, Taehyungie, eat something ..." Hoseok said cheerfully.
Tae doesn't seem to have even registered the offer. He goes right through everyone and goes to the porch, leaving the house and looking around. Jimin explains to others what was going on.
"He's not out there," Tae says, returning to the living room.
Hoseok tells him to calm down while he and Jin would look for the maknae.
“You aren´t even properly awake ... Take a shower, change your clothes ... Then eat something. You were impressed by your nightmare, that's it.”
“Don't you know JK? He must be taking great pictures and so he has lost track of the time ...” - Jin said – “Last year, on our first Bon Voyage, in Norway, he stopped to take pictures or film and some times almost got lost, remember?”
Taehyung tried to soothe his anxiety.
Namjoon returns to the living room, still drying his hair.
“I've heard you talking, guys ... What's going on?”
Namjoon was told what´s happened and he added :
“He took the camera and left, thinking I didn't even notice. In a little while he's back making the usual noise ...”
The comment had to do with the speaker that Jungkook carried all day and which the hyungs had already threatened to throw into the pool.
"He left with a cellphone, didn't he? Just call him, guys. I'm doing this now.” Said Yoongi.
Taehyung commented:
“His cell phone was almost dead and he said he was going to turn off for a while to save battery ...”
Yoongi tries again but gets no result and says:
“It must be still off . He must be so distracted by what he's doing that he even forgot to turn on his cell phone, Taehyung.”
“He's been out for a long time ... That's when I came to sleep on the porch ... What time is it now?"- said Namjoon.
“Almost noon ..." Jin replied.
“Come on, Jin, let's go for a walk and look for him.” Said Hoseok.
Hobi , aware of the intensity of the relationship between Taehyung and Jungkook, recommends to Jimin that he take care of Taehyung.
“Distract him, make him eat something ...”
“Leave it to me, hyung. I´ll take care of him."
Hoseok and Jin come out through the porch. Hobi asked the others to call them if the maknae returns first. The two friends surround the perimeter of the house, then decide to separate and follow different paths.
**********************************
Jungkook didn't know how much time had passed since his fall. Maybe a few minutes, maybe a few hours ... He was still in the same position he had fallen into, but the light outside was different. He knew he had to get out of there. He tries to get up, but as he sits down, his head hurts. He runs his hand over the spot of pain and realizes that he has cut himself because his hand comes out damp with blood.
“Oh ... shit ...”
Concerned about his situation, he remembers his cell phone and reaches into his pants pocket. That´s when he sees the camera right beside him, on a pile of dried leaves.
“Aish .... I just hope it's still working ...”
He turns on his cell phone and tries to make contact, but the signal was not good at all. Jungkook gets up carefully. His head ached, but otherwise he looked good. He considers the situation while trying to look for any signal. The place looked more like a cave than a well. The walls were stony and damp, full of mud. He evaluates if he could climb to the pit opening. He uses the phone to light up the wall he would have to climb. He looks at the screen and sees the battery almost over ... Suddenly, he notices a signal in the phone. That´s when he receives a call.
Jin makes contact with the maknae and his apparent calm while he was with Hobi gives way to anxiety when he asks flustered :
“Jungkookie !! Where are you ??”
The maknae's voice seemed distant and the sound was very low:
“I fell ... in a hole ...”
“Hole ?! Where ?? Did you get hurt ?” Jin hurried to ask, now anxious to figure out what might have happened to the maknae.
The signal from Kookie's cell phone flickered and it made him angry. His answers were broken and what he heard was equally fragmented. He needed to keep his arm outstretched to get a better signal. He managed to talk about the river and the waterfall, but his cell phone battery was entering a critical phase and could turn the phone off at any time.
"... low battery ..." was the last thing he could say before the phone went out.
Aware of Jungkook's situation, Jin warns Hoseok that he is going to where he was. He also rushes to warn friends who stayed in the house about everything that was going on. Jin calls Namjoon.
“But is he hurt?” Asked Joonie, who was on the porch, while Yoongi and Jimin talked to Taehyung in the living room to distract him.
"His cell phone battery ran out before he answered me ...But by his voice he didn't seem hurt. Once I find the right place, I'll call you back.”
“I will contact our guide as well. He will be able to help.”
“Okay !”
When Namjoon returns to the room, Taehyung's eyes don’t fail to notice his change of attitude. So many years living together made everyone almost transparent to each other.
“Who was ... ? “ Asked Tae before anyone.
“Jin. He was able to talk to JK.”
Everyone started asking questions at the same time, so Namjoon gestured for them to be quiet that he would explain the situation.
“Why don't we all go there then? Lets help !” Said Tae, running over Namjoon's explanation.
“Wait, Tae, wait ... Go to where ? Let's wait for more details. Jin said he'll call again as soon as he finds him. I'll call our guide ...”
Tae's mind worked a mile a minute and he was impatient, pacing the floor nervously, wondering what might be happening right now with the maknae.
**********************************
Seokjin found the small waterfall and, searching carefully, found the gap where Jungkook had slipped through. He leaned over the crack and saw the maknae.
“Jungkook-ah!”
“Hyung!”
“Are you alright ? Did you get hurt ?”
Kookie runs a hand over the back of the neck where there was the cut from which a trickle of blood had dripped.
“I hit my head, but that was all.” He didn´t want worry his hyung.
“ Can you climb up?"
“I've tried many times ... but I haven't found the exact point to climb yet. The wall is also very slippery ...”
Hoseok arrives and quickly becomes aware of what happened.
"What if one of us goes down to help him?" Hoseok asked Jin.
"It's to be six of one and half a dozen of the other..." Jin replied. “ The help must be on its way. Namjoon triggered our local guide.”
In fact, soon the guide arrives with the rest of the group that was in the house, except for Yoongi. Everyone wants help in any way, but someone should be home just in case someone from the staff showed up. Eventually they would report it, but they would rather do it when everything was solved.
The guide had brought a climbing rope and made the necessary fixings on a nearby tree so that he could go down and rescue the maknae without difficulty. Taehyung wanted to be able to talk to Kookie, but he knew it would hinder the task, so he lets to be hugged by Jimin, who was somehow holding him.
Namjoon and Jin would help the guide to get the maknae off. Since the day was cloudy and the place was very humid, they were shivering. The guide came down, talked with Kookie, who handed him the camera so that didn´t get in the way when he climbed.
“I will scold him so much! Muttered Tae, distressed and annoyed.
Jimin smirked and said to relax his friend :
“Koo will escape the hole, but he can't get away of being scolded, huh?”
Taehyung could not fool his friend who had known him for so many years. Outwardly he said he wanted to scold the maknae, but Jimin knew that all Tae wanted was to be able to hug the maknae and put him in his pocket if possible.
Hoseok, Jin and Namjoon were somehow blocking Tae and Jimin's sight, who could only see the maknae's arms and the top of his head. One more push from the guide and one pull on the rope and Kookie's body appears, so that Jin and Namjoon can pull it off. Everyone surrounds the maknae and starts talking at the same time, in the chaotic BTS style, but the one who breaks the circle that formed and goes straight to embrace the rescued is Taehyung. Tae knew the scene was a little embarrassing, but he still couldn't hold back. And he was going to rebuke the maknae when he notices the blood on Kookie's clothes.
"Hey ... hey ... that´s blood ?! You're hurt ??
Everyone starts talking at once again and asking Jungkook, who wanted to reassure them that he was fine, but his appearance said otherwise: dirty, blood-stained clothes and he was so pale ... In fact Kookie was hungry, cold and tired of so many failed attempts to climb the hole. His body starts showing signs of his physical exhaustion. With his eyes fixed on Tae, he was explaining to everyone about the wound, but he had to lean on Jin's shoulder beside him to keep his balance. Hoseok and Tae noticed this sign of weakness at almost the same time, but Hobi was quick to suggest:
"Let's talk at home, guys ... JK is tired !! I think we need to get him to the doctor.”
At this point Kookie protested:
“N-no, hyung ... I don't need a doctor ...”
“Makdongie, now you obey the hyungs : period !! Concluded Hobi, skilled at making reprimands in a loving and irrefutable way.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
While resting, Jungkook looks at the pictures he had taken since the trip began. He was enjoying photography and filming more and more. He thinks about working with it professionally one day. He didn't like to think of a future where BTS no longer existed, even though he knew this would happen one day. His heart pounded at the thought of it. He wanted to be able to record all the images of these times lived so intensely ... Surely it was being the most decisive part of his life, the one that was forming his character and personality. But sometimes time seemed to pass so fast! The maknae wondered to himself: Why does time seem to run so fast when we are on a trip? If he could freeze every good moment lived and relive all the good feelings for days at a time, he would. But that was impossible. Time does not stop. Since they left Korea for that trip so many things have happened ! Many moments which Armys would never know due to editions, but he had engraved them on his mind and senses. And his best memories were all associated with Kim Taehyung. When Jungkook and Hobi lost all the money they could use to buy dinner and friends ended up remembering them and spending a little of what they had on buying them food, Taehyung made sure to buy them fruits and ramyun, but Jungkook realized that during filming, cameras would shift whenever something related him to Taehyung. This made him a little sad because he knew that the result of the editing would eventually have the purpose of not showing how close they were.
Seeing the pictures he had taken on Mauna Kea Mountain where everyone went to watch the splendid sunset , Jungkook remembers Yoongi's words: “You can't capture all that beauty with the camera.” That's true : neither the beauty nor the happiness of those moments could be captured through any device. They were treasures to be kept in the heart. Even so, everyone was thrilled with the view and took many pictures. He and Taehyung took several pictures from each other that would be stored in their personal collection.
Jungkook recalls that when the sun was beginning to set under the compact ocean of clouds, the view was paradisiacal. Being able to enjoy that moment with his best friends and, especially, with his beloved one was something so meaningful that made the event unforgettable. Jungkook could remember all the details of that day. Hoseok asking them if they had any special goals to achieve that year with BTS ...
“Be healthy and not injured.” Answered Jin.
“Rank among the best on Billboard! Hot 100 chart!” Answered Namjoon.
Hoseok replied that what he wanted most was for his mixtape to be ready and asked others what they intended to achieve individually, if they had any dreams to realize. And Jungkook remembered very well what he had answered: that he wanted to master English and that this was not a goal just for that year, but for a lifetime. Until that moment, Tae had been silent, just watching what everyone was saying and reflecting on it. His eyes followed every movement of the maknae and Jungkook could feel it: even when they were apart, they were close.
As the colors of the sky grew more and more magnificent with the end of the day, heralding the moment when the sun would say goodbye and the earth would plunge into shades tinted with orange, pink and lilac, other tourists who was around came close to watch it. “The colors of the sky while the sun is setting are wonderful! It looks like a rainbow!” Said Namjoon.
Tae sighed, looking at the landscape and thinking about what Namjoon had said. The view from the top of that mountain was breathtaking. Jimin was dazzled and was trying to film everything with his cell phone. The last traces of the sun dipped on the cloud carpet, tinting the entire sky with various shades of orange. They said goodbye to the sun with some melancholy. To keep the atmosphere from turning sad, Jin proposed, clapping his hands:
“Let's all be happy this year !!”
Hoseok joined him with the same intention of wishing the group good energy and said with open arms:
“Let's keep making good songs that can inspire people!”
The moon was already appearing in the sky, even though there was still a little light of the day, and Namjoon drew the attention of others:
“Guys, look at the moon!”
The maknae recalls that Yoongi had been so amazed that he had wanted to take a picture of the moon. At that moment everyone was distracted, talking about the landscape, about the future, and Jungkook, ecstatic about the landscape and thrilled by the moment, had muttered to Taehyung, who was at his side :
“I would live here forever ...”
Jungkook remembers this quick conversation they had, trying to escape camera range. Taehyung had asked him quietly, his eyes shining:
“With me ?”
And he had answered without hesitation:
“Yes.”
Jungkook saw Taehyung had bitten his lips almost imperceptibly. He didn't want to show how much that quick conversation had filled his heart with hope, warming him inside. Was it possible that one day this would happen? Could they live together on their own without accounting for everything they do ? They both knew how difficult it would be, if not impossible, in Korea. The idea that this could happen in another country gave him a kind of encouragement. Suddenly all the talk he and Taehyung had before the trip about the need to master English had never made so much sense. Taehyung knew that he would work hard for that purpose. Jungkook had never thought that a simple trip could fill his heart with so much hope. But they didn´t know what the futur would bring to them.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The continuous noise of the movement of someone swimming in the pool lasts more than half an hour. As the pool was not very large, who was swimming had already made many comings and goings.
“How is he up to swim after everything we've done today?” Namjoon asked Hoseok as they watched the maknae from the porch of the house.
“He's full of energy ... I'd say it's growth hormones too, if you understand me ..." - replied Hoseok with a meaningful look.
“Ah, hormones for sure! He better spend all of them on physical exercise ...”
Hoseok agreed with a smile.
“Let's go help Jin in the kitchen. That’s our last night here.”
Taehyung comes to the pool and watches the maknae for a few minutes while Namjoon and Hoseok enter the house.
"You said you were joining us soon and you’ve been here for a long time ... That's enough, isn't it?” Said Taehyung reproachfully
Jungkook swims to the edge where Taehyung is crouching to talk to him.
"Swimming helps me relax ..." said the maknae, resting his arms on the edge of the pool.
"And you are nervous?"
Jungkook didn't answer right away, staring at his own hands before lifting himself out of the pool.
"Hey ... it'll get me wet ..." Taehyung said, pulling back a little. His gaze lingers on his companion's shapes outlined under his wet clothes.The maknae sat on the edge of the pool, his feet in the water. He runs his hand over his face, hair and eyes, then turns to Taehyung and replies:
“The trip is ending ... Tomorrow we'll back home ...”
“Yeah ... It wouldn't last forever ...” Taehyung commented innocently without thinking about the repercussion his words would have on the other's thoughts.
“Exactly.”
Taehyung watches the wet face that stared at him. There’s a look of annoyance or... frustration ?
"When you talks like this, just a word or two, I know your brain has a whole speech being fabricated ..."
The comment got a slight smile from the maknae.
“I was thinking about the letters that were read today on the boat ... What you wrote to Jimin ... that he is the person with whom you share sadness and joy since you started in the group.”
“Hey, this is not new to you ... And we both ... share much more than just good times and bad times.”
“Yeah ... For how long ?”
Taehyung swallowed hard.
“What do you mean ?”
“You said right now : nothing lasts forever ..."
Taehyung raises his eyebrows and replies:
“You know I was talking about the trip!”
Jungkook swings his feet into the water gently.
“I know. But doesn't that really apply to everything?”
Taehyung was about to answer when Seokjin's voice was heard through the balcony door.
“Jungkook-aaah! You said you were going to take care of the lamen, but you haven't left this pool yet!”
Jungkook shouts an affirmative answer and gets out of the pool, followed by Taehyung. The maknae picks up a towel Hoseok had left for him and begins to dry himself before entering the house. Taehyung knew it was not the time to have that conversation.
“Can we talk more about this later?” Asked Taehyung, lovingly rubbing the towel in his mate's hair.
“Sure.” Replied Jungkook.”Later.”
Beyonce's song 'Halo' played, filling the mood as the last dinner of the trip ended. Yoongi and Namjoon had already left the room, so sleepy they were. In this second house they've rent, the rooms arrangement was different from the first one : Yoongi and Namjoon were in the same room, Hoseok and Taehyung in another, Seokjin alone and Jungkook shared a room with Jimin.
“Oh we eat a lot ...” - said Jimin – “How many packages did you make, hyung?” He asked Seokjin.
“I made for twelve people ... JK made 5 more but spicy ...”
“It was very good ... it disappeared in seconds! There’s nothing left !” Said Hoseok, taking the leftovers.
The official filming had already ended and the staff had withdrawn, so Jimin decided to open another bottle of wine.
"Jimin-ah ..." Hoseok began to warn.
"Calm down, I won't drink alone ... Jungkookie will drink with me ..." Jimin said, raising his voice toward the maknae for him to hear and agree.
Jungkook had already finished eating and had started washing the dishes, silently helped by Taehyung. Hearing his name mentioned, he answered toward the dining table.
“No, no ... I won't drink wine ...”
Jimin got up and headed for the kitchen, two glasses in hand. Taehyung stood quietly halfway. Hoseok and Jin, who were finishing dinner, watched from afar. Jimin could be a little inconvenient when he drank too much.
“Jiminie, tomorrow we have to be in good condition to travel. Will you want to travel a hangover?” Asked Taehyung, getting close to his friend.
“I won't get a hangover drinking so little and eating so much ...” - Jimin replied laughing. “Jungkook-ah ... this cup is for you to toast with me: you cooked very well!”
Seokjin made himself heard from where he was sitting:
“Hey, he only did half the job! Technically the toast should be with me.”
“Hyung ... I'll make a toast with you too.” Replied Jimin, turning to the dining room and taking a gulp of wine.
Taehyung remained in the same spot, interposing himself between Jimin and the maknae. Jungkook had just done the dishes and was going to the living room to pick the last plates and lamen pan off the table, but Jimin cut him off before Taehyung made a move.
“Pay the toll to get out of the kitchen."
Taehyung rebuked his friend : “Jiminie, stop being silly ..."
“Oh, Taehyungie, you dunno how to play!” Jimin answered.
Jungkook didn't want to be seen as 'helpless', so he frowned at any intervention on Taehyung's part. They had silent communication that few people knew how to decode.
"I pay your toll," said the maknae, taking the glass Jimin offered him and taking a sip.
Taehyung bit his lip discreetly in a mixture of worry and frustration. Jungkook set the glass on the table and collected the rest of the dishes he intended to wash.
“This boy is atomic energy powered.” - Jin said, referring to Jungkook – “I'm already so sleepy ... Do you think they will do something silly at this hour? I wanna go to sleep but ...”
“You can go, hyung. I stay until the end and "collect the kids" ...” – Hoseok said jokingly.
“Oh, thanks, Hobi ... If you need you can call me, you know ... I never sleep right away, so ...”
“Okay, okay ...” Hoseok went to the kitchen to warn them it was time for everyone to go to sleep. "Task is over, bedtime, boys."
Jimin wasn't much in the mood for sleeping.
“Hyung, it's our last night ... Let's at least make a toast to the success of the trip!"
“You've made a dozen toasts already," Hoseok replied trying to dissuade him from drinking even more.
Taehyung reiterate Hobi's request:
“Yeah, let's go to sleep, Jimin-ah ...”
Jimin sets his glass on the kitchen counter and nods. He looks at Jungkook and repeat Taehyung’s words :
“Yeah, let's go to sleep, Kookie ...”
Taehyung had forgotten for a moment that his two friends were together in the same bedroom. He knew nothing much would going to happen, but he was still bothered. Jimin wanted to play the cheeky guy and he took Jungkook by his arm just to tease Taehyung. But the maknae himself had other plans and managed to escape Jimin :
“I won’t sleep now. My clothes were wet and I put them in the washing machine and now I have to put them in the dryer.”
“Arrrr ... Jungkookie ...” - complained Jimin with his satoori accent.
Taehyung had no reason to worry, but he was relieved anyway. Jimin would probably fall asleep as soon as he fall in the bed, but if he was with Jungkook he'd be in the mood to tease the maknae, simply because it was something he had always enjoyed doing.
Hoseok and Tae followed Jimin into the bedroom and stayed with him for a while until he felt asleep. As they left the room, Taehyung started to return to the living room to talk to Jungkook, but the maknae was no longer there. Hoseok eventually convinced Taehyung that they had better go to bed soon, because the next day would be tiring.
After finishing doing laundry, Jungkook picks up his camera to film the last moments of the trip, the house and the night. He was feeling a little lonely. He didn't want to share room with Jimin, but with Taehyung. Sadly he had no luck in either of the two houses they rented. He adjusts the camera's focus and begins filming the living room, the chandelier, the kitchen. Then he decides to film the door to each room, explaining where the group members were sleeping. He goes to the porch, put on Namjoon's slippers and goes outside to the pool area. The night was so cool and everything was so quiet that his thoughts seemed to be screaming in his head.
He puts the camera on a table with the intention of filming himself and sits on the floor against the wall surrounding the house. His thoughts choke him and he begins to sing the chorus of a song that touches his heart a lot:
“There's nothing like us
There's nothing like you and me
Together through the storm
There's nothing like us
There's nothing like you and me
Together...”
He remembers every moment of that trip, the walks, the jokes, the sunset on the mountaintop, the idea of living in Hawaii, the helicopter flight over the volcano crater! How significant it was to be with Taehyung at such a special moment like that one ! However, as soon as the helicopter landed and the group positioned themselves to film their impressions about the adventure, Jungkook realized that the camera was not framing them both. They were the only who were out of frame. That's because Taehyung was so happy that he'd forgotten about the camera for a second and was hugging him around the waist. How many times had this happened ... And how many times this would still happen ... Cut footage, edited scenes ... He knows the company's intention is to protect both of them from any defamatory attack, and, by extension, to preserve the group integrity as well. But even so, his heart could not help feeling an uncomfortable pain. He wished he could vent out to Taehyung ... He had said they would talk later, but ... The moment was gone.
“I gave you everything baby
Well, everything I had to give...”
Jungkook's tone grew lower and trembling in this part of the song and he stopped singing and recording too so that the tears that slid softly down his cheeks could flow. If only it were Taehyung in the bedroom instead of Jimin! He would go back into the house and wouldn't mind spending the night talking or, even better, sleeping cuddling, as they had done so many times before ...
Jungkook runs his hand over his face, wiping his tears and breathing heavily. He decides to settle down to sleep right there. He grabs a mattress that cushions a lounge chair and sets it on the floor for a makeshift bed. He takes the camera and tries to position it on the mat, close to his face, but finds no stability. He wants to film the last moments of that night, as if that could slow time down.
“I think I should sleep now ... “- he says, looking at the camera – “What a round face ... I'm very puffy ...”
What Jungkook observed on his face was due in part to the sun he had caught all these days, but also to the tears that had made his eyes red and slightly swollen. He stops recording without adding any further.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Six hours of rehearsal seemed too little for the maknae. He wanted a flawless performance. The movements seemed exhausting for anyone watching. Maybe that's exactly what Jungkook was looking for: to leave his body exhausted. That seemed the best way to make him not think about Kim Taehyung. He had started the rehearsal along with Hoseok and Jimin, but after his companions were satisfied he stayed alone rehearsing his part. Deep down, he wasn't rehearsing anymore, but only exhausting his body. Finally, he lay on the ground, exhausted, gasping, his whole body sweating. Meanwhile, his mind was agitated, thinking about the next presentations, but also thinking about the measures the company was taking to keep him away from his partner. The directors make it sound like any interaction between them will be misunderstood, will be seen as something forbidden. Due to his popularity in Hwarang, Taehyung was often being requested for activities far away from him and sometimes apart from the rest of the group as well. And gradually the company tried to associate Jungkook's image with Jimin's, as if offering to the fandom the formation of another duo to replace the one they were trying to overshadow. Jungkook and Jimin were friends and became even closer when Taehyung was filming Hwarang and started going out with his actor friends. But there was nothing more than a friendship between an older brother, affectionate and protective, and a younger brother, very active, intense, but also very reserved.
It’s precisely Jimin who comes to rescue him from his deep reverie.
“Jungkookie... Are you still there? Aren't you hungry?”
Jungkook accepted Jimin's hand to help him get up and answered :
“I´m starved. “
“Come and let´s eat something, then. There's a lot of delicious stuff today... “ said Jimin, trying to cheer him up. “ You guys are always insisting that I should eat... This time you're the one who has to eat something.”
Kookie wanted to ask about Taehyung, but he didn't want to be so obvious. Jimin already knew him very well and was aware of the feelings his two friends had for each other. He read the question in Jungkook's eyes and answered :
“Taehyung is also there. “
“I thought he had already left, after the rehearsal. He said he was tired.”
Jimin looked at him like someone who understood everything that was happening.
“No. He decided to wait.”
Both enter the resting room where Taehyung was lied on the couch, with earphones , apparently focused on the music he was listening to. Hoseok was also still there. He saw once again the recording of the rehearsal they had just performed. On a side table, several tasty snacks awaited the boys.
Jungkook looked at Taehyung at a glance, trying not to watch what he was doing, neither how he was lying down, nor whether his looks were coming in his direction or not... But he failed.
“Oh, I've watched our movement several times and I think we can still improve...” Hoseok said to his colleagues “On stage it seems that who is in position 4 will always be a little late to take position 3. I think we could shorten the distance between us in this part?”
He recognizes he was already tired and says :
“Let's leave it for tomorrow, right, guys? Let's go ? Jungkook-ah...”
Hoseok gets up and fraternally hugs the maknae from behind.
“That looks good.” He says, watching what the little one was eating.
“It's pretty sweet. I need sugar.”
Taehyung wasn't paying attention to anything but the maknae. Jimin sits next to him on the couch and asks :
“Hey, Taehyungie, have you collected your things ?”
“Yes...”
“And whose is that ?” he asks, holding a white cell phone charger.
“Ah, it's mine...”
“So, you were just about to leave it here...” says Jimin patting Taehyung's head.
A staff member comes to tell them that the company car was waiting for them.
“We're on our way.” - Hoseok answered “Guys, get your things!”
While they were going down to the garage, Jimin teases Jungkook :
“Yuck, you're too sweaty! You have to take a shower…”
This time Jungkook looked at Taehyung when he answered :
“That's what I intend to do as soon as we get home.”
Taehyung's eyes were not indifferent to that scene. Quite the contrary: his gaze scanned the maknae's body from top to bottom. Since Jungkook had decided to discount all his energy in physical exercises, dedicating himself to weight training and some boxing lessons, his muscular definition was noticeable improving. Once he was growing fast, he was allowed to change his boyish style.
The four of them settled in the car and headed for the apartment they share. The group's current dormitory was the best they had ever had, but it was still temporary, as they had already planned to move to a more luxurious and exclusive place. The idea was that each one could have their own room, since practically everyone, with the exception of Jungkook, shared a room with someone.
Taehyung closes his eyes for a moment. After the group's anniversary celebration in June, when everyone gathered on to chat between them that has been show to Armys, it had become clear to all members how involved the two were. Sitting in front of each other, they hadn't been able to stop exchanging glances or significant gestures. After the event, the two were called by the company for a serious conversation and the hyungs were once again instructed to monitor them. Since then, they tried to avoid each other, but an imperceptible magnetism ends up leading them to the same spaces.
Taehyung thinks about how insoluble their situation was and how it worried him. He knew Jungkook felt the same way and he also knew how Kookie’s increasing devotion to the tasks that required physical strain was part of his way of dealing with the situation. On the other hand, Jungkook was also able to bring a certain serenity to Taehyung, even though the maknae was younger than him.
**************************************************************
Exchange of messages after midnight:
TH : Up ?
JK : Y
TH : Hey
JK : Huh?
Taehyung sends a picture of the mole at the tip of his nose. Jungkook smiles looking at the screen and sends a picture of the mole below his lip. Taehyung gives a broad smile and bites his lower lip.
TH: I wna a place to share with u
where at the end of the day we can be tgthr talking abt rehearsal
our dreams our future
without anyone judging us
JK: the new dormitory ?
TH: Yeah
I'll make it happen
JK: U so confident
TH: we didn't meet e o by coincidence
It was our destiny.
JK : I feel the same
TH : go to sleep thinking abt it
It will work
and rest
u need it
I can see how hard u r working.
JK: I don't wanna make mistakes and mess it up
TH: U know it’s more tn that
JK: when I rehearse I stay focused
I don't think abt anythg else
TH : I know
when u r focused on smthg u don't even talk !
but don't mistreat yourself
don't turn any bad feelings into a weapon against yourself
Do u rmber Jimin?
How much did he push himself to have a perfect image?
JK: Y
TH: he hit the bottom bc of that
overtraining, eating disorder
u know he is still struggling with the problem
so I'm gonna be rlly annoying abt that with u
don't overwork yourself so badly
JK: I won’t
TH: promise ?
JK: promise
TH: Ok let's sleep
long day tmrw
JK: sleep well
TH: U too
************************************************
The new song, DNA, was successfully presented to the group. Everyone was already aware of the theme and they knew details about the concept of the new album, but listening to the finished song brought an energy that reinvigorated everyone. It was a sign that the comeback was approaching. Namjoon and Yoongi had worked on this composition for days until it was exactly as they wanted it to be. Taehyung looked significantly at Jungkook, throwing a telepathic question at him. Both thought that the lyrics spoke a little about them. Or was it just their imagination? The description actually fits any pair of souls who recognize themselves as belonging to each other ...
“At first sight, I could recognize you
As if we were calling for each other
The DNA in my blood vessels tell me
That it’s you I was looking all over for…”
The meeting continued with the presentation of visual concepts, costumes, etc. There was so much work to do that they didn’t realize time passing. Only when they started to feel hungry they noticed it was late.
“Oh, I'm hungry!” complained Jin.
“Let's wrap up for today. We have everything ready for tomorrow.” said Namjoon.
Hobi added:
“Yes, we’re going to eat, but I'm not going back with you guys. I will stay to see the details of the new choreography with Song-Deuk Nim and with Keone and Mari Madrid via video call. They are in New York.”
Namjoon looked at him and smiled when he asked:
“Hoba, did you think that one day we would be doing something like this? Working with an international team?”
“ I had this dream, but I didn't think it would come true that soon !”
The other members headed for the cars that awaited them. Jungkook right behind Taehyung, thought they would go together in the same car. But the staff assigned them to different cars, directing Kookie to the same car as Jimin. The fact, which was not uncommon, became a recurring rule and, little by little, they became aware that the company's intention was to keep them subtly apart from each other. Sometimes the intention was not so subtle.
Days later, during the photo shoot for the new album, Taehyung could not contain his admiration for the costumes of the new concept and his eyes lingered on Kookie as if admiring a work of art. He passes by and whispers imperceptibly in the back of Kookie’s neck:
“You're fucking gorgeous...”
The maknae cannot help shivering and smiling. But the two did not realize that they were being closely watched by one of the directors.
“Let's start with the individual photos. Taehyung-ssi, you first!”
The members looked at each other, a little surprised, since what had been set was to start with the group photos. Namjoon questioned the director, but received only a dry reply. Yoongi and Hobi noticed it and tried to make everybody laugh, asking Jin to tell a joke while they waited.
A few hours passed and they were still taking photos.
"Coffee break !" Said the director.
Seokjin murmured to Yoongi:
"Oh I want more than coffee ...I'm starving..."
"Forget it. A short break is better than nothing. Think we're going to be done soon.”
After the individual photos, the group photos started. That part took some hours until the director was satisfied and ended that first photo shoot.
"That's all, folks. We can continue it tomorrow."
Everyone was relieved and they started talking about what they wanted to eat, when the director called one of them separately :
"Jungkook-ssi, could you stay a little longer? We need to redo some pics..."
Kookie looked confused. And tired.
"But I thought ..." Jungkook murmured softly, then obediently added "Yes, of course."
Taehyung looked at the director. In his mind, thousands of questions were piling up and he wanted to pull Jungkook out of there so they could talk in peace, but, before he could do anything, Jimin seemed to read his thoughts and said:
"Not now. You talk to him later. Let´s go..."
Similar episodes took place in the days following : different schedules only for them, subtle separations, extensive and sometimes exhausting rehearsal hours only for the maknae, who never complained. The rehearsals of the choreography were getting more and more intense, with the proximity of the release of the MV and the comeback approaching. So much responsibility put on his shoulders make Jungkook practice tirelessly.
On the first day of recording the MV everyone had impressive new looks.
“Hobi, this hair color is awesome. The fans are going to freak out! “ said Jimin, praising him.
Hoseok makes a cute face for his friend.
Yoongi passes by them and Jimin also comments on his hair color:
“Ah, this shade of blue got amazing on you, hyung!”
Yoongi seems not to be affected by the comment, mostly because he suffers too much from the hot weather. Even though it’s already September, Summer has not gone yet. Yoongi just looks at Jimin and gives him a nod.
The outdoor footage is always more tiring. Even though it was morning, the weather was hot and muggy. After filming each sequence, the group checked on the monitor how was the result. They detect errors and try to correct them. Namjoon was concerned because he thought he was not doing his best.
The sun had already set down, but they still had more work to do.
"Ah, at least the weather is cooler now ..." says Yoongi.
The group was filming the sequence of linked hands, forming the idea of the DNA molecule, but something always went wrong. The director interrupts and says:
"Let's do this part again."
Everyone complains in unison, but they know they have no other option. The more perfect the choreography comes out, the faster they will finish.
Everyone got in the right position to continue. Taehyung was positioned behind the maknae and, tired and bored, rests his chin on Kookie's shoulder, rubbing the body against his. Seokjin, who was beside him, notices the movement and pats him on the ass, calling his attention to behave himself or they would not finish filming anytime soon. Jungkook felt a pleasant shiver run down his spine, but still he did not move. He was afraid that he could draw even more resentment towards himself, Taehyung or the group.
During the movements, Jimin's jacket slips off his shoulder, exposing him slightly. At the end of the recording of this scene, Hoseok teases him, saying:
- Showing your shoulder again! ...
- I didn't do it on purpose ...- replied Jimin.
Taehyung looks at him realizing how much Jimin knew how to explore what most fans liked to see. This worried him a bit, because, sometimes, it put his friend as a part in the company's game, to make them a more profitable product.
They start to play of ‘revealing their shoulders’. Even Yoongi had fun showing his. But despite the jokes, Kookie, normally playful, was serious and silent.
External recording was over, but the shooting day was not over yet. They went on to record the indoor scenes. New clothing change and make-up adjustments.
Despite the strenuous day and prolonged filming, the group was still in the mood to play with each other. Seokjin told jokes that Jimin always laughed at. Taehyung was focused on making his best and Jungkook too. Both were feeling, in a way, implicitly pressured by the direction, as if the MV's success depended exclusively on them. It was a lot of pressure!
Finally, the long day of filming was ending. Everyone was dismissed, except Taehyung and Jungkook. Some members stayed to support the two maknae. Seokjin was particularly exhausted, but even so, he wanted to stay a little longer. The MV had many scenes where only Jungkook and Taehyung appear and these were the scenes that were being recorded. Exhaustion caused Jungkook to did a few moves wrong and it made the shooting to extend a bit more.
After the end of the filming, the two still recorded some words to appear in the archives of the backstage. The exhausting day was over and, in a few days, the big moment of the comeback would come.