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Freshman Days at Beacon U
It was another boring Friday night at Beacon Hills College.
Liam read over his paper for his world civ class, one that wasn't due until the following Friday, but he was always enthusiastic about history.
He checked it for a clear, concise message, proper sourcing, and thoughtful presentation.
As he made it through the part about Mesopotamia, he heard a snarl, the grunt of frustration, and the fall of pencils and papers to the floor from his roommate’s room.
While their dorm was small, they had separate rooms with a combined common area kitchen.
He caught the faintest hiccup of tears and the scents of anger, frustration, and self-loathing crept into his room.
He carefully placed his paper on the nightstand and rolled off his bed.
He silently padded towards his door, dealing with the momentary cold against his naked back and feet from the AC and the polished floors.
As he made it to the door, he heard the faintest murmur, "This is all your fault."
He knew Justin was alone and his heart fell just the slightest bit from Justin's self judgement.
While they really didn't get along, he didn't hate his roommate.
They were just two very different people.
Slowly he stepped through the dark common area and stopped in front of Justin's barely cracked open door.
The sliver of light fell across his face as he softly tapped on the door.
With a huff, he heard Justin slide his wooden chair and stomp towards the door.
Justin wiped his face forcefully as he opened the door.
With anger lacing his words, Justin demanded, "What do you want, Liam?"
His natural tendency was to spit the anger right back but that would defeat the purpose.
He calmly asked, "Is everything alright?
I heard something fall."Justin turned and walked back into his room, leaving the door open as he picked up the papers, pencils, and bit of charcoal.
Justin replied, "I'm fine Liam.
I dropped my stuff."
Liam stepped in and picked up a sheet of Justin's papers and saw the picture.
It was him, from the table in the quad.
He noticed the small smile on his face as it looked like he was enjoying Mason and Corey's story while they ate lunch.
The lines and style were awe inspiring.
He asked, "When did you draw this?"Justin whipped around and snatched the sheet from Liam, "Monday."
"It's me and my friends."
Justin smirked, "At least it wasn't so bad you didn't notice."
He reached over and placed a hand on Justin's shoulder, causing the boy to shoot a glare at the offending limb, "Hey.
It's really good.
Why aren't you in art school?"
Justin pulled away from the touch and set everything down on his desk, "It doesn't matter."
Liam followed as Justin to a seat in the wooden chair, "Yeah, it does matter.
You're really good."
With a wry grin, Justin replied, "Because some homophobic asshole had different ideas."
He took a deep breath, not wanting to push Justin too far.
He asked, "What are you working on now?"
Justin shuffled the papers and showed the bare outline of a picture, "The beauty from the quad.
I can't finish it though."
Liam could see the strong beginnings, the passion poured to the page, "Why not?"
Justin flicked the fingers of his right hand and held it by his wrist, "Every time I try, my hand cramps up and stops moving."
"Oh."
They stood in silence for a few moments before Liam's eyes lit up, "Why don't you try again?
Maybe you need an audience!
Positive motivation."
"I need a good surgeon not "positivity"."Liam picked up the piece of charcoal and handed it to Justin, "Just try.
It doesn't hurt right?"
Justin shot back, glaring at the utensil, "Easy for you to say.
I just told you what happens."
Liam grinned and pushed it into Justin's hand, "I want to see the finished piece.
I might even pay you for it."
"You don't have money."
"Alright, I'll buy every meal for you tomorrow for it."
Justin sighed and stared at the page, "But if I can't finish, nothing right?"
"Yeah"
Justin turned around and picked up the page and the wooden board backing and began to work.
Almost immediately, Liam caught the scent of stress and pain.
He placed his hands on Justin's shoulders, lightly massaging the tissue but making sure his thumbs rubbed the naked part of his roommate's neck.
Justin shivered as Liam began to take his pain, "What are you doing?"
"Positivity.
Don't worry about it, just sketch."
Justin huffed before he continued.
Liam watched in amazement as Justin's movements sped up.
Between the charcoal lines, smudges, and blowing away the dust, the picture slowly came into focus.
He felt the crippling pain shooting up his arms but the creation before his eyes took his attention.
When it was finally finished, Justin let out a cheer, but Liam was silent, in awe.
The coifed hair with just a few strands over his forehead.
The smile and strong chin.
The cut of the man's chest and abs.
He knew the beauty of the quad.
He hadn't seen him since the hospital, but he knew Justin couldn't have invented him.
It was Theo.
Justin spun in the seat and Liam's hands fell to his sides.
The blonde boy with blue eyes, the other one branded "Sunshine" looked to him in exaltation, "Oh my god.
It actually worked.
I guess you're more than just a history nerd, lacrosse player that can eat two large pizzas by himself."
He blushed at the compliment but looked back to the picture, "Do you know who that is?
Like where did you see him?"
Justin licked his lips as a coy grin grew, "Doubting your sexuality?
I had a feeling Hayden was your beard."
He shook his head and instantly argued back, "No!
I-I just think I know him.
If that's who I think it is."
Justin preened proudly, "He's one of the skater boys that likes to work out.
I don't know his name but I could talk to him next time."
"Where did you see him?"
Justin chuckled, "My secret, straight boy.""Can I have that?"
Justin's grin grew, "I'm pretty sure I can draw him naked, so you can imagine what his cock could look like too."
"Asshole."
Justin bounced his brows, "Prick."
Liam picked up the piece of paper and stared at the representation of Theo.
Justin quickly followed, "And that'll be breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
And if we are counting a 24 hour day, then coffee too.""Coffee comes with breakfast."
Justin looked to the clock, "12:04, Liam Dunbar.
Which means we're going to grab coffee.
Throw on some clothes and let's go."
Liam fed from Justin's enthusiasm, "Alright, but why does it hurt for you to draw?
and what did you mean by a surgeon?"
Justin's smile fell, and he softly followed, "Alright, no coffee.
Beers it is."
"What?"
"I'm not talking about that sober.
It's part of the reason I'm here.""Alright, Justin Taylor.
Drink here or the bar?"
"Here.
I'm not having a heart to heart in a crowded bar.
Plus, het bars here are sketch."After getting back from the store and opening the door to their dorm, Justin laughed and shoved a plastic ID into Liam's chest with a laugh, "The lady thought we were brothers and handed me your ID."He fought back his anger and took the fake ID.
He looked at the picture and saw that it was his.
That meant he put Justin's in his wallet.
"I don't see why she thinks that."
"I know.
I've got better hair, clearer eyes, a better smile, and I know how to dress."
He pocketed his ID and pulled out Justin's shoving it back into his chest, "My hair is better, I'm built, and there is no way your smile is better than mine."
Justin snatched his ID and walked the beers into his room as he replied airily, "You work out more.
I'll give you that.
But that's it, Dunbar.
Plus, the absence of socks on the door tells me I'm right."
He couldn't fight the anger as he snapped, "Fuck you Justin."
"I know, you want to straight boy."After downing four of the beers and nursing the remaining two, with only a couple of arguments between them, Justin began to open up.
Liam felt a hint of guilt, being completely sober as he sat in the wooden chair and listened to Justin open up on the edge of his bed, "I didn't want to come to Beacon Hills.
It wasn't my idea.
My mom.
She made me.
After."
"What happened?"
Justin shot him a glare, "You wouldn't understand.
Some people just need to make someone feel like nothing, need to feel superior, need to hurt them."
He took a moment before he spoke, "Justin, I know at least a little about that.
Some of the things Brett and Devenford's lacrosse team did to me while I was a freshman were inhuman."
"Then why did you keep playing?
It's a game.
You could've stopped any time."
He took a sip from the brown bottle and continued, "Because it was my outlet.
I didn't want to be strung out on antipsychotics and lacrosse seemed to work for that.
Until the abuse.
Until it didn't."Justin gasped before he took a long swig from his beer, "I'm sorry, Li.
I didn't realize.
You shouldn't have been treated that way.
It's fucked."
"What happened to you?"Justin downed his beer and let it tumble free from his fingertips.
He met Liam's gaze and those light blues told a story of pain before the man opened his lips.
"It was prom.
The happiest day of my high school life.
I was there with my best friend but the man I loved surprised me by being there.
We were the center of everything.
The entire dancefloor emptied, and we were the two kings of the dance, the spotlight on us.
It was some straight out of Disney romance.
After a few drinks and dancing, it was time to call it a night.
I was going to meet up with him later, so it wasn't that serious.
After kissing him goodnight and walking away in the parking deck, it happened.
I don't remember all that much but I do remember the sound.
A baseball bat makes a very distinct sound against someone's skull.
That's when I blacked out."He was prepared to hear many things.
A car accident.
A fire.
Maybe even a fist fight.
Liam wasn't prepared for that and his beer slipped from his fingers and hit the floor.
The glass bounced without breaking and the little remaining bubbled from the tip.
Justin didn't seem to notice, his eyes locked as he stared off, "My mom told me they didn't expect anything good.
They were worried I'd never wake up.
But I did.
I woke up to a changed world.
A world that stole my talent, mocked my sexuality, and separated my love."
He barely managed an, "I'm sorry" before Justin painfully smiled, "I lost my chance at art school with the nerve damage and loss of mobility in my hand and I lost him.
So, when my mom convinced my dad to actually pay for school if I left Liberty Avenue, I took it.
Hopped on a plane and didn't look back."
"I didn't know."
Justin lightly shrugged, "Not many people here do.
It's not your fault.
It only hurts sometimes, and my memory comes and goes but most of the time, I'm fine."
Liam stood and accidentally kicked away the fallen bottle and he reached and pulled Justin into a hug.
He gripped the boy tightly, "Sorry for being an ass."
Justin returned the grip, "It's okay.
I'm a prick to you."
"Why are you a prick to me?"
"You're fun to rile up."
He chuckled at the quickness of Justin's remark, "That's not funny."
Justin laughed as he responded, "Then why are you laughing?"He pulled away from the hug and picked up the bottles and carried the remaining empties to the kitchen and placed them in the sink.
He grabbed a towel and rushed back to wipe up the mess and Justin held a drawing in his hand.
He wiped the floor and looked to the coy smile on Justin's face, "What's that look for?"
Justin shook his head as he continued to look at the drawing, "Nothing.
Just seeing something I didn't catch before."When he finished cleaning up the spill, he took the towel into the kitchen and let it join the bottles in the sink.
When he returned, Justin was sitting in the wooden chair, beginning to sketch something new.
He looked to the bed where the page he was admiring sat and asked, "What are you drawing?"
Justin lightly replied, "Something new.
Something I didn't see until recently."
He tilted his head as Justin glanced back with a telling smile, "Why do I get the feeling it's about me?"Justin instantly answered, "Because it is."
"What did I do this time?"
Justin went back to the page, "Oh, nothing."
Curiosity got the better of him as he walked to the bed's edge and sat.
He picked up the page and looked at the sketch.
It was in the quad and he was studying, a pencil in his hand with a book open.
It looked simple, but as he noticed the background, he caught what Justin was talking about.
Justin managed to sketch the larger brick building, the school library, but he also captured a person leaning against it, skateboard in hand.
The figure's eyes were locked on him and while distant, he could make out the hair and face.
Theo was watching him study and the smallest smile graced his lips.
He almost tripped as he jumped to his feet, "When did you sketch this????"
Justin musically replied, "Oh...I don't know.
I don't remember."
He rushed over and almost knocked the pencil from Justin's hand as he slapped the page on his desk, "No seriously.
When was this?"Justin shot a look to Liam that could peel paint as he set his pencil down and shook his hand, "I told you I don't remember.
Do me a favor, Li, do the massage trick again.
I need to finish this sketch idea before my brain lets it go."
Liam sighed and stepped back as he began to massage Justin's shoulders and take his pain.
He began to lean over and watch but Justin shooed him away with his hand, "No peeking!
It's a picture of you.
You'll get to keep it so relax."
Liam huffed and looked away, "Are you sure you don't remember?"
Justin chuckled as he scratched the pencil tip against the page, "Of course I remember.
I like hearing you get worked up.
It was the first week of school.
I'd just met you the day prior and your face is a good one to draw."
Liam blushed, "So I'm good looking?"
Justin ribbed him, "No, your face has a lot of angles."
"Prick."
Liam took continued to take his pain as he asked, "So that.
They did it because you're gay."
"Yeah."
"I'm sorry."
Justin sighed, "Stop apologizing Liam.
It happened.
I told you because you should know why I get frustrated with drawing.
I love it but it's painful now.
Something else."
After a heavy silence, Liam asked, "How did you know?
That you were gay?"
He caught the scent change to joy, "How did I know?
I kind of always knew.
And by the time I was a teenager, what I didn't know, the internet helped me figure out."
"What?"
"Porn, Liam.
It's called porn."He argued back quickly without thinking, "But you were underage."
Justin flatly replied, "No shit, Li.
Just like we're both underage and bought beer with our fake IDs.
And you're welcome."
He chuckled at the response, "Yeah.
Thanks for getting me a fake ID.
That was the first time I used it."
"And you took mine when she handed them back.
Smooth move, twinsie."
He gruffly argued, "We're not twinsies."
Justin's chuckled leeched the anger as he leeched the man's pain.
He liked seeing this side of his roommate.
Maybe Justin wasn't anywhere near as bad as he'd originally thought.
He let his mind wander, pulling the pain and was surprised when the pain stopped.
Justin shifted in the seat and pushed the paper flatly against his chest.
He quickly pulled it free and his eyes widened as he gasped.Liam stared at the sketch.
Justin hadn't worked on it long, but he could feel the emotion, and see the details.
The black lines on crisp white pulled his mind to the scene.
The cold steel doors of the elevator.
The sterile scents of bleach and various cleaning agents.
The desperation and thoughts that this could be the end.
As his mind panned out, he found the focal point and cut into it with laser like precision.
It was a picture of him, eyes closed, held tilted as he kissed Theo.
He didn't miss the mixture of passion as he saw their fingers carding through the hairs of the back of their head, pulling each other impossibly closer in the picture.
Justin's voice pulled him back and his roommate sounded a bit anxious as he asked, "What do you think?
Tell me you like it!"He pulled his gaze from the picture and must've shift his look harshly because he saw Justin flinch.
He managed to gasp the word, "How?" but Justin rambled as he reached for the picture.
"I'm sorry Li.
I had an idea and you probably think this is some sick gay boy desire and I didn't mean anything by it but I just saw his expression and felt like this needed to happen."
Liam pulled back and protected the picture, "No, Justin.
This is fine.
I like it.
But why an elevator?"
Justin let his arm fall slowly back to the edge of the chair, "It felt right.
Like you two don't know what's in store on the other side but it's going to change your lives.
It just felt right."
Liam took a deep breath, "Yeah.
It did feel right."
"What?"
He shook his head, "N-nothing."He slowly pulled the slightly crumple edged paper back and looked at the picture.
Justin's art really did have an almost magical realism to it.
He must've stared too long because Justin inquired in a curious tone, "Why did you ask me about when I knew?"
"What?"
Justin cleared his throat and repeated, "Why did you ask me about being gay?
Are you questioning things?"
The heat shot to his cheeks as he slowly shook his head, "Um, no.
No questions here.
Definitely question free."
He barely looked over the top of the page as Justin stood.
He lifted his eyes slightly, meeting the glassy light blues.
A bit of lust crept into Justin's voice, "Are you sure?"
He swallowed hard and shook his head, the scent of attraction and arousal pulling at the edges.
"I-I mean, no.
No, I'm not sure."
"But you like him?"
"I-I don't know.
Maybe?"
"Maybe or yes?"
He almost argued, "Why couldn't it be no?"
Justin's conniving grin blossomed, "Because you aren't mad.
Not even the slightest bit."
Liam's eyes scanned, trying to break free of the gaze of those blue topazes cutting into him, "Um, maybe I am.
But I'm hiding it.
Yeah."
Justin slid his fingers over the tip of the page and slowly pulled it from Liam's hold.
Their eyes remained locked as Justin placed it gently on the desk.
Liam began, "Um, are you okay?
What are y-"
In the time it took for him to speak, his roommate ran his hand over his shoulder and to the back of his head and pulled them together until their lips met.
Justin's lips were softer than he expected, and the passion wasn't unenjoyable.
His mind accepted the kiss as he returned one more of curiosity and courtesy than real passion.
As Justin pulled free and stepped back, rubbing the top of Liam's shoulder, he asked, "Do you have a question now?"His face felt like a heat lamp hit it as he stuttered the words, "Um, yeah, uh, no, I mean."
He took a moment to collect his thoughts and compose himself before his irritation began to rise, "Actually.
Yeah, why did you kiss me?"
Justin shrugged and tilted his head, "You wanted to know if you liked guys.
One kiss to set you free.
So do you?"
"Um maybe."
Justin grinned, "You kissed me back.
Better than your ex?"
"Fuck you."
Justin laughed as he stepped to his bed and fell back on it, "We could.
But baby steps."
His eyes widened, "I don't want to do that!"
Justin leaned his upper torso up and looked to Liam with his feet planted on the floor, "Not with me.
With the beauty of the quad."
If his face could feel any hotter, he'd be surprised.
He coughed the, "No" quickly but Justin replied just as fast, "Well.
Li.
I think you passed this station for liking guys."
"What?"Justin pointed at his loose fitting sweats with a snicker and a grin.
He looked down and felt a hint of betrayal as little Liam appeared to be ready.
Justin continued, "I'm flattered Liam, but this was for you to answer that question.
Now you've got to find the cute skater boy.
The one I'm not."He quickly grabbed the page from the table and looked to Theo kissing him.
He asked innocently, "So, you'll help me find him?
Help me talk to Theo?"
Justin nodded slowly, "Yes, Liam.
I helped you put that question to rest so what kind of friend would I be if I said no.
And his name is Theo.
This'll be easy."
Liam almost growled, "How will this be easy?
I didn't even notice he was going to school here."
Justin laughed as he plopped his head back against the bed, "Because he noticed you.
All we have to do to find him is act like everything is normal.
He'll show up."Liam walked to the door and began to step out but felt he needed to say something to Justin.
He glanced to the boy and with a small smile he said, "Thanks.
You're not Theo, but you're not a bad kisser."
Justin giggled and replied, "Any time, Li.
And it's the moisturizer.
You've got to take care of your lips."
He chuckled at the joke as he protected the page and walked back to his room.
Any negative thoughts about Justin had evaporated.
He might be a prick, but he wasn't a bad one.
Maybe being his dormmate through college wouldn't be such a bad thing.