Work Text
I want to know what passion is. I want to feel something strongly.TJ Kippen read over this excerpt another three times before pressing lightly down on the page with one hand and stealthily highlighting Aldous Huxley's words with the other. He sat hunched over in the same position on his bed for the last few hours, reading and analyzing the newly assigned chapters of Brave New World.While the rest of his Honors English groaned at another at home novel assignment, TJ bubbled quietly with excitement, mentally checking off the novel on his books-to-read list. English was his favorite class aside from History, and he was a huge sap for literature. He'd never admit it though; he was already known for being the stupid kid that couldn't do math. Naturally, bookworm or literature nerd wasn't something he wanted to add to his glittering reputation.TJ's love of reading and his English class was his little secret, especially since his fondness was influenced by another reason. A certain brown-eyed boy sat directly in front of him in this class and he turned around, meeting TJ with grin that signaled that he shared the same enthusiasm for the literary endeavor.The boy shook his head, whisking away the thoughts of his mental tangent. "Back to the Savage," he muttered to himself, popping off the cap of his light pink highlighter.-*-The blonde just finished packing up his backpack and gym bag for school and practice tomorrow, stopping to inhale the scent of his freshly washed uniform.TJ sighed before flopping onto his disheveled sheets and turned off the lamp on his right side. He was going to sleep earlier and earlier these days. It's so unlike me to make good decisions, he joked to himself. The other day, he had actually caught himself being excited for school and if TJ from a few months ago saw him now, he'd think Principal Metcalf or his mother or the fricking illuminati had finally taken him hostage and was brainwashing him.He knew that his change in behavior was apparent and hard to ignore. He remembered how he was: callous, emotionally detached, and too competitive for his own good. He frowned slightly and guilt flooded his body like it always did as the memory of how disdainfully he treated his now-sorta friend Buffy Driscoll entered his head.TJ pressed his hands into his eyebrows, running his fingers over them as he groaned in frustration. I'm different now, he thought, removing his hands from his face. He looked up at his ceiling to see that his stick on stars illuminated from the soft light that seeped from his ajar window. He started to genuinely believe this.For a long time, after his father got diagnosed with cancer in late May of his sixth grade year, life kept taking low blows to him and his family. Money was obviously tight with his dad out of work and the never ending mountain of medical bills; his mother and sister were emotional train wrecks -- but who could blame them?The weight of the situation affected TJ too, but he tried to hide the fact that he was struggling to keep his grades up and he was horrendously failing math. Which is why he resented Buffy when she first found out about his learning disability. TJ couldn't accept it; he wouldn't. He couldn't add to the list of burdens to put on his family at the worst time possible. So he endured through the pain of it all silently, juggling his dad's illness, math, basketball, and his part-time job to keep the family afloat.TJ regretted a lot of things from that time but most of all he regretted how he lashed out at Buffy. Every time she reminded him of his inescapable truth, she rubbed salt deeper and deeper into the wounds he tried to ignore.But he knew the reason why everything changed; he remembered the switch going off in his head. TJ felt the goodness in him, his conscious, that was suspended and lost in the depths of chest being gripped by a thin yet firm hand. It pulled the goodness out of the abyss in his chest and into the light with the words "there's nothing wrong with you". His heart grew three sizes that day, TJ thought to himself, rolling his eyes. I'm like the real life Grinch.A crisp early spring breeze brushed his uncovered legs and snapped TJ out of his thoughts, and he looked around at the basketball and magazine clippings that covered his walls. TJ placed his hands down at his sides and reached blindly for his phone until he felt its cool surface under his palm. He raised it to his eyes and the screen read 9:34 PM. He should still be up, TJ thought, unlocking his phone and pulling up a contact. He stared at the contact picture for a moment, when a voice almost inaudibly whispered, you're the reason, in the back of his head.He silenced this voice as the dial tone began and a few seconds later it was interrupted with a sleepy "Hello?""Hey Underdog," TJ murmured shyly, realizing he must've woke up his friend, "I'm sorry were you asleep?""Nah", Cyrus tried to play it off on the other end but the yawn that followed made this very difficult. "It's no big deal, though. I'm actually glad you called! I want your thoughts on the new chapters!"TJ couldn't fight the smile growing on his lips, "How about I tell you tomorrow before class? You should get some rest". TJ tried to hide the begrudging edge to his voice."No" Cyrus softly whined, earning a chuckle from the boy on the other line, "you woke me up and now you have to stay on the call with me"."Fine, fine" TJ feigned unwillingness, although he internally sighed in relief. He heard Cyrus giggle and one of those pesky butterflies in his stomach fluttered rapidly. Note to self, TJ thought, call an exterminator."So tell me about your day, Underdog" TJ urged, rolling onto his side.Cyrus began to gush about his weekend escapades with Buffy, Andi, and Jonah, his voice raising in pitch as his story grew more exciting. TJ chimed in with a few "wows, uh huhs, and reallys" as his lingered on how adorable Cyrus' voice sounded on the phone, a fact he still wasn't over after multiple phone calls. He once again pushed this thought away."TJ, are you even listening?" Cyrus inquired with a slight tint of amusement in his tone. TJ could picture him now, laying on his dinosaur sheets, with his nose scrunched up."Of course, Cy. Andi dropped her hot dog all over Jonah's new jeans." TJ repeated to get himself off the hook."Right" Cyrus huffed cutely before continuing with the story. Cutely?! TJ mentally exclaimed. He quickly pushed this away with the rest of the dangerous thoughts he buried regarding his best friend. He seemed to be the master of the lock and key recently as well. TJ couldn't deal with his feelings right now, not when the seams of his life were holding on by a single thread.He continued to listen to Cyrus' story but was more engaged this time. He added a comment here and there that won a hearty laugh from the boy on the other line, his favorite sound in the world. Their banter continued for a while, but the later it got, the harder it became to bury his confused feelings. He knew that his sleepy state erased his filter."Teej" Cyrus murmured coyly, his voice traveled directly into TJ's right ear and sent shivers up his neck. TJ was too tired to blame his reaction on the night breeze.Instead he hummed a gentle "hmm?" in response, a small smile dancing on his lips."I'm glad you're my best friend" Cyrus practically whispered. TJ felt a slight blush creep up his neck and swirl on his cheeks. He decided to ignore the pang of emotion he couldn't quite place that nudge his stomach."I'm glad you're mine too, Underdog" TJ breathed, a smile evident in his voice. "I think I'm going to knockout"."Okay" Cyrus cooed, "I'll talk to you tomorrow then.""Of course, good night, Cyrus," TJ got out slowly, his mind drifting away as he heard "Night, Teej", followed by sweet silence.TJ floated into a dream with the comforting thought that Cyrus was his best friend and only that. It was familiar; it burned warmly and quietly. The risk of anything more than that was too loud for him to deal with, absolutely too scary to acknowledge, which is why he continued burying and locking up thoughts that tempted him to take such a risk. While he dreamed, the smallest of upturns was visible on his lips.TJ was content with the way things were. But like with most things, life had different plans for him.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
With bitter reluctance, TJ pressed his shoulder lazily against the front door of Jefferson Middle School. This was his usual reaction to early mornings throughout sixth and seventh grade but eighth grade brought new changes for him, one of them including a eagerness to go to school. Maybe it was because he was really fond of his English class or maybe it was the fact that he finally had a supportive friend group. Or maybe it was the influence of a certain boy with an affinity for odd facts and chocolate chip muffins.Today, however, TJ was far from eager to start his day, especially so damn early. After his call with Cyrus, he dreamed in peace up until about 1 am. After that he was plagued with a series of nightmares he couldn’t remember in his conscious, though he suspected each was worse than the last. He did remember seeing his father’s face in the last one and someone screaming out his name.TJ frowned and groaned under his breath, dodging past the herd of middle schoolers to get to his locker. The groan must’ve came out more like a growl because a few students in his proximity turned their heads to give him strange glances, side stepping to prevent coming in close contact with the jock.TJ rolled his eyes, almost thankful to be avoided. He knew he was in a mood and wouldn’t hesitate to bite someone’s head off.After a few more strides, TJ reached his locker and swiftly put in his combination before swinging the small door open, perhaps a little too aggressively.“Whoa, there tiger!” a familiar sweet yet mocking voice spoke up from his behind the locker door, “you nearly killed me!”“Sorry,” TJ muttered, grabbing a few textbooks and closing the door, feeling guilty that he almost smacked Cyrus in his pretty face- ...Pretty?The jock felt his eyes roll back inside of his skull before slamming his forehead onto the metal in front him, not hard enough to cause any brain damage though. He couldn’t deal with his confused feelings on such low energy.“We’re feeling awfully chipper today” Cyrus joked slightly but couldn’t hide the concern dripping in his voice, “Is everything okay?”TJ felt the tension in his body release slightly. It was difficult for him to be grumpy around Cyrus.“Yeah” TJ sighed, finally making eye contact with the other boy, who offered him a small smile, “just didn’t get the best sleep of my life last night.”“You fell asleep at like 10:30, any earlier and I’d start thinking you’re my grandpa Muriel” Cyrus giggled. TJ’s lips betrayed his bad mood as they lifted upward, forming his first smile of the morning. The two boys began walking towards their first period class, TJ’s favorite of the day.“Yeah, but I get nightmares sometimes so I was tossing and turning for the second half of the night… but it’s no big deal” TJ shrugged hoping Cyrus wouldn’t press the subject any further, “So, the Savage is your favorite character right? Please say yes.”Cyrus’ eyes seemed to get three shades brighter, and TJ swore they were so big they’d put CGI princesses to shame. “How is that even a question?” the other boy beamed.TJ nudged Cyrus softly with his shoulder and shot him a cheeky grin before walking in front to open their classroom door. They were met with bright, warm sunlight that seeped through the large windows on the side of the room.After muttering a greeting to Mrs. Danfield, TJ slipped into his seat behind the smaller boy already sitting in front of him, feeling the warmth of the light seep into his brain.-*-Amongst the chatter of the pre-teen infested cafeteria, the Good Hair Crew and Jonah sat in their usual table in the middle of the room. Cyrus placed his baby blue lunch pail, decked out in an array of astronomy, dinosaur, and movie reference stickers, on top of the table. He pulled out a PB & J that his mom had carefully prepared that morning while he listened to Jonah and Buffy gush excitedly about some crazy new roller coaster that just opened at an amusement park in a county outside of Shadyside. Apparently Jonah and the Space Otters were going to celebrate their huge victory against their rival school. He was planning a trip to the park for the next weekend and was trying to convince everyone to attend. Cyrus shuddered at the idea of even being in the presence of something called “The Gut Buster”. He whisked the thought away and took a bite of his peanut-buttery goodness.“Oh come on, Cy Guy!” Jonah pleaded, “You were an honorary member of the team.”“There’s no way I’d ever get on any rides, let alone that death trap,” Cyrus looked at Jonah in playful manner. He remembered how looking into Jonah’s eyes as they spoke would make his heart want to combust. Now he was left with a comfortable neutrality.“You have to come! You too, Buffy and Andi!” Jonah pleaded even more desperately.“I think I’ll pass” Cyrus took another bite of his sandwich.“I’m with Jonah!” Buffy chimed in, chewing on a french fry, “It might do you good to get out of your comfort zone.”“Thank you, Buffy!” Jonah nodded.“When I said dancing with danger is on my bucket list, this is not what I had in mind” Cyrus groaned.“Who’s in danger?” a voice said from above them. Cyrus turned his head to see a smiling TJ slide into the seat beside him.“Teej!” Cyrus chirped. The taller boy winked at him playful. TJ didn’t always come sit with them at lunch; he usually sat with the guys on the basketball team. Today was one of the instances he did; Cyrus decided those were his favorite lunches.“Cyrus refuses to go to the amusement park with us next weekend because he’s a big ole scaredy cat!” Andi recounted, her voice mocking. Although the other two-thirds of the GHC and Jonah were a little skeptical of being friends with TJ at first, they gradually accepted it after he apologized to Buffy. Andi was the most amicable towards the situation, while Buffy and TJ kept up a banter, sometimes a little more aggressive than other times. Jonah, on the other hand, kept up his usual indifference.“Mock all you want!” Cyrus rolled his eyes, “I’m gonna live to see summer vacation.”“You’re scared of rides, Underdog?” TJ couldn’t help but smile, “is it height or speed that scares you?”“All of it!” Buffy whined, “There’s a whole list of things baby Cy is afraid of.”Cyrus shrugged his shoulders sheepishly, an embarrassed smile on his lips. “There is a list,” he admitted, “I have copies of it!”TJ chuckled, ruffling the smaller boy’s hair with his fingers. Cyrus’ cheeks turned pink. “You’re kidding, a list?”“Well, it’s not really a list of fears, per se. It’s more like a list of things I want to do eventually, you know, if I wasn’t terrified of doing them.” Cyrus explained, unzipping his backpack and pulling out a notebook. He pulled paper out from the inside and handed it to all of his friends. Buffy and Andi looked at him, amused.“So, like a Bucket List?” TJ inquired, studying the delicate handwriting on the page, written in hot pink ink. TJ couldn’t even refute that that wasn’t adorable.“Yeah,” Cyrus beamed, leaning closer to TJ to read his copy of the list. TJ smirked at a few things that caught his eye, ranging from huge undertakings like directing a Disney movie to smaller tasks like holding a live snake.Light bulb, TJ thought.“What’s the park called?” he asked, glancing at Jonah, pulling out a purple pen from the front pocket of his bag.Jonah brightened up a little, “The Lagoon.”Teej wrote something down on the paper Cyrus handed him and showed it to the group.Trip to The Lagoon was written in loopy letters at the bottom of the list.They all looked up at each other smiling then looked at Cyrus expectedly.“Okay. Fine! I’ll go,” Cyrus huffed, blowing hair that laid over his forehead up slightly, “But, TJ has to go.” This request warranted a eyebrow raise from Buffy to which he responded, “I need all the moral support I can get.”“You got a deal” Jonah agreed, his white teeth exposed. Just then, the bell that ended lunch went off and the group exchanged goodbyes. TJ ruffled Cyrus’ hair once more, grinning, before walking in the other direction.TJ headed towards his life science class, still thinking about how pretty Cyrus’ handwriting was. -*-The brightness of his mood stayed with TJ up until his after school basketball practice. He tried to ignore how his lack of sleep wore on him, feeling exhausted before the boys and Buffy even started their warm ups.The team got in position to start passes, TJ coincidentally having a perfect view of a colorful girl with a pixie cut and a brunette boy dressed in a plaid button down and a slightly oversized cardigan beside her... Okay, maybe not so coincidentally.Andi and Cyrus would watch Buffy practice sporadically in the beginning of the season, but they became regular fans of the basketball team as TJ got closer to the GHC + Jonah. Buffy loved the support from her friends and TJ loved it even more, often sneaking glances at the bleachers as Andi and Cyrus cheered during plays.TJ was lost in thought but reacted in enough time to narrowly dodge the bright orange ball hurdling towards his face.TJ stood in shock for a split second before irritation took over his senses at the sight of one of his teammates chuckling dryly in front of him, wearing a smirk.“What the hell was that, Reed?” TJ strode over to the messy blonde, his voice booming. Reed didn’t flinch, his smirk never wavering.“I know you get distracted when your faggy boyfriend is around, but you should really pay more attention,” Reed sneered in a small, teasing voice, much like the tone someone takes on to speak to a puppy.Buffy snapped her head to face the two, throwing Reed a look that could literally put him six feet under, and TJ’s irritation was quickly replaced with shaking rage.In response, TJ tackled Reed to the ground, earning a few scalding curse words to fly out of Reed’s mouth. The team seemed to divide, some on each side of the boys, ready to defend their respective teammate. On the bleachers, Andi and Cyrus raised their heads, wearing the same wild, confused expression, and Cyrus stood up when he saw the team break out in a commotion.After a few seconds, Buffy lunged towards them, peeling TJ off of Reed with all her might. TJ roughly jerked away from her grasp.“I think I hit a nerve” Reed sniggered, looking more amused than wounded, still on the ground. TJ bounded towards him again, but Buffy pushed him back.“As much as I’d like to kick his ass with you, he’s not worth getting suspended from the team, TJ" her words were understanding yet sharp with conviction.TJ was still shaking, his face and neck red hot in anger. It had been a while since TJ was engulfed in anger, almost blindly. He didn’t know how far he would’ve gone if Buffy hadn’t stopped him, much to his disdain.“Whatever,” TJ scowled at Reed, “Just get this fucktard out of my sight”. Buffy stifled a laugh before roughly pulling Reed to his feet and pushing him in the direction of the locker room.Reed was tempted to retaliate physically, being more outraged that Buffy emasculated him in front of the team than at TJ’s tackle, but he decided against it, knowing he’d face a storm of trouble for coming at a girl.He just gritted his teeth and glared at her. He scoffed out a “Later, Losers!” then turned to storm towards the showers. He turned around and shouted “Lester! Harris!”, which prompted a few of the guys to trail behind him meekly.“Guess practice is over then?!” Buffy exclaimed exasperatedly, throwing up her hands and letting them drop dead to her sides.The rest of the jocks that crowded around dispersed in different directions, chattering as if nothing had even happened, laughter rippling out here and there.TJ sat on the bottom bleacher opposite of everyone, putting his head in his hands. His mind was still whirling. Why had Reed insinuated that? What prompted him to make a snide fucking comment like that, TJ mentally grumbled. Was it the insinuation of them being boyfriends that bother TJ so much? Or was it more the use of that disgusting word?Before he could answer, or in his case, avoid his own question, he felt a hand grip his shoulder. He looked up to meet the eyes of his curly headed teammate.“What?” TJ grumbled, his voice spiteful.“Geez, I’m just checking if you’re okay. I heard what Reed said”, Buffy said still mad at the situation, yet cautious with her wording. Buffy had an inkling that Reed’s comment bothered the boy in more ways than one.TJ moved his body away from the girl and frowned before plastering on a grim smile, “I’m just peachy.”“That’s a lot of hostility towards someone who just defended you” Buffy replied dryly, walking in front of his line of vision, crossing her arms.“I didn’t ask for you to defend me, Driscoll” TJ spat, getting up and walking past her, bumping into her side briskly. TJ couldn’t explain why he was responded so aggressively towards Buffy, feeling the old feeling of how he used to be re-enter his body.“What’s wrong with you?” Buffy snapped, “There’s only room for one asshole on this team, and his name is Reed.”The boy huffed. “Just stay out of my damn business” TJ wouldn’t let up, a few feet away from the girl.Buffy groaned, clearly not letting it go either, “You make it so hard to be friends with you, Kippen! You really haven’t changed; you’re still Toxic TJ!”TJ’s face fell; Buffy’s pointed words stung him more than he thought they would.“Look, I’m sorr-”“Save it, Kippen!” Buffy exclaimed, turning to walk away. At this point, Andi and Cyrus came down from their seats on the bleachers and walked up to their fighting friends. TJ felt himself tense up, barely realizing that Cyrus witnessed the whole situation.“Why are you two fighting?” Andi pressed, looking both confused and ready to attack when seeing Buffy’s anger practically radiating off of her body.TJ looked at her for a second, before looking meaningfully at the boy next to her, who was avoiding TJ’s gaze, staring at his undone shoelace.“Oh nothing!” Buffy grumbled sarcastically, “TJ is just attacking someone who cares about him! I don’t know why I even bother!”“Buffy I-” TJ began again, before being interrupted.“Do you ever think about anyone else but yourself, Kippen?” Buffy accused harshly. TJ felt his anger heat up again, the tension rising amongst the four of them.“Sorry I didn’t feel like having a girly heart-to-heart.”“Of course!” Buffy scoffed, “still just as sexist!”All of sudden, Cyrus became vocal again, panicking at the sight of a friendship he worked so hard to patch up coming undone, “Let’s all just chill out, please! We’re all friends here!”Buffy huffed relentlessly, “I can’t call him a friend until he proves that he can do something nice for another human being!”TJ scowled in disbelief, “Are you serious, Buffy? All this stink?”Buffy didn’t seem affected by his words, “I still had my doubts before this and now I don’t know if I can trust you again.”Cyrus sighed next to them, frantically running his hair through with his fingers. TJ made eye contact with the boy, feeling himself soften.“Fine,” TJ said, calmer, turning his head to look at her, “I’ll prove it to you. Name your price.”“I want you to do something selfless because I genuinely don’t think you’re capable of it,” Buffy seemed to simmer down as well but her voice and body language signaled that she was still upset. She placed her hand mindlessly on her hip and felt something in her pocket crumple underneath her palm. She slipped her hand inside, pulling out a folded piece of paper. She remember the conversation at lunch and without looking, knew exactly what was in her hands.“I want you to de-fear my buddy, Cyrus,” Buffy challenged, her tone taking on a playful yet competitive twinge. Cyrus turned to his friend in confusion, walking to her side.“De-fear?” TJ laughed dryly, glancing between the two.“Yeah, you’re gonna complete half of the things on his bucket list by the end of the semester. Show me that you can do something nice for someone else out of the selflessness of your heart”.“Buffy, he doesn’t need to do this!” Cyrus whined frantically, “He’s done many nice things for me before!”TJ would’ve smiled at Cyrus’ comment if he hadn’t been so upset by the events of the last twenty minutes.“No, Underdog. It’s fine. If I have to earn Buffy’s trust, I’ll do it” TJ said more gently than he had been all afternoon but his tone became sarcastic as he faced Buffy “I never back down from a challenge.”“Good. I expect updates when you’ve checked something off the list” Buffy said, her attitude slightly more playful now, “And no lying”.“Cross my heart.”“Hope you die!” Buffy glinted.“Don’t I get a say in this?” Cyrus exclaimed desperately.“No.” the two deadpanned. Cyrus pouted, his eyebrows furrowing. TJ felt his stomach flip.Andi giggled next to him, “I think I need a milkshake.” She said, resting her arm on Cyrus’ shoulder.“Make that two.” Cyrus sighed. TJ started to walk away, heading towards the locker room.“See you guys later” he called out neutrally but smiled for a moment at Cyrus before looking straight.“Wait!” Cyrus ran towards him, “You really don’t have to do this, Teej. Buffy will be fine in a few days, honestly.” He looked up to meet the other boy’s green irises.“It’s too late. Challenge Accepted”, TJ smirked at Cyrus, “I know it might be a lot of work ridding you of your many, many fears, but I think I can handle it.”“Yeah, yeah. I know I’m a mess,” Cyrus teasingly rolled his eyes.“Mmmm. A hot mess” TJ slipped out. Cyrus' face turned a particular shade of crimson red as he looked down and bit his lip. He tried to convince himself that that was a joke, but the taller boy coughed next to him, clearing his throat, and Cyrus swore he seemed almost bashful.“Besides, Underdog” whatever side of TJ that was dissipated quickly, returning to the overly confident jock, “It could be fun”. TJ wiggled his eyebrows at Cyrus, earning a giggle from the smaller boy. TJ grinned.“Cyrus! Are you coming or not?!” Buffy hollered, her voice impatient.“Yeah!” Cyrus called back. She and Andi began to walk towards the exit of the gym. “I’ll see you later, TJ.”“Bye, Cy.” The two boys smiled at each other before the smaller one jogged after the two girls.TJ was once again alone with his thoughts; they seemed less negative this time around. Cyrus’ impact, he thought. But he still couldn’t shake the way Reed’s words had made him feel. He pushed it away, running towards the locker room.-*-TJ pushed open the front door of his home haphazardly, sighing in relief at the sight of the ugly purple rug at the bottom of his feet. He kicked off his shoes, taking in the same decor he’s grown accustomed to in his fourteen years of life.When TJ was born, his parents were revisiting their high school taste in both fashion and furniture. Apparently the new-wave, John Hughes-esque scene was "in" in their day, and after his older sister’s birth, his mom and dad were reaching to reclaim their youth. Ugly green curtains is how they did this. It didn’t really bother TJ much, however, the place had a certain charm to it, like it was fresh out of an 80’s magazine. TJ liked to think that a scene of Stranger Things could be filmed here.As he made his way to the staircase that led to his room, TJ heard noise come from the kitchen so he placed his shoes and bags by the side of the stairs before turning into the other room.“Hey, teddy bear!” his sister Amber sang, still wearing her uniform from the Spoon. She was holding a pint of orange juice. “God, you look awful. Rough day?”TJ rolled his eyes both at the comment and Amber’s silly nickname, “Ambs, you know I hate when you call me that.”“Theodore, don’t be so touchy” Amber said, fake glaring at him. He swiped the pint out of her hand and opened it. She smacked him when he drank directly from the bottle, causing him to snort into the drink.“You’re impossible,” Amber sighed, “But really, what’s up? Did something happen at school?”TJ frowned slightly, “Kinda, it’s just been a little hectic lately. I’m having the nightmares again.”Amber’s face fell, her expression sadly knowing. When their dad’s condition started getting worse, everyone dealt with it differently. Their mom lost a concerning amount of weight, Amber threw herself into school work and lots of shifts at The Spoon. She pulled away from her friends, but TJ thought it was for the best, the crowd she hung out with last year weren’t great influences. And as for TJ, Amber often woke up in the middle of the night to hear the screams of her little brother, crying out during another nightmare.Things got better when their dad went into remission though. Still, Amber knew that the trauma of it all has residual side effects.Amber pulled TJ into a hug, who resisted slightly but then gave in. The moment was sweet until he heard “I’m sorry, Stinky.” TJ pulled away and pushed her slightly.“Ah, well. Hopefully tonight is better,” TJ shrugged and bent down to look in the fridge.“Oh Mom and Dad are out still. So I brought home dinner” Amber held up a paper bag that displayed The Spoon in bold red letters. TJ snatched it out of her hands and tore into it savagely.“You’re welcome” Amber scoffed; TJ ignored her. She knew what would get his attention. “Talk to Cyrus today?”TJ stopped eating for a second but only a second, smashing a burger into his mouth.“Maybe” he said in-between chews, “but I did almost killed Reed today.”“What’d that idiot do now?” Amber sneered, taking a baby tater from TJ’s pile and popping it in her mouth.“Oh nothing really, he just called Cyrus my faggy boyfriend” TJ grimaced as the words escaped his lips.Amber nearly choked on her baby tater, “Ex-fucking-scuse me?” was all Amber managed go get out.“Yeah, I know. I tackled his ass before Cyrus’ meddling best friend pulled me off” TJ shook his head, crumpling the remains of the bag into a smashed paper ball and sent it flying towards the trash bin. It went it with a swoosh.“I’m sorry, TJ. For you and Cyrus. He doesn’t deserve that” Amber’s tone got softer.“It’s just… I hated that he insinuated that we're dating and” TJ started, unsure of how to finish. “I get it, but do you, you know, actually like Cyrus?” Amber asked, treading lightly.“He’s my best friend” TJ said matter-of-factly.“Just a best friend or a best friend you want to kiss and whisper sweet nothings to?” Amber pressed, wiggling her eyebrows.TJ knew he looked like he had just sunbathed for ten hours so he didn’t deny the truth, “probably the latter.”“So you came to your man’s defense” Amber grinned cheekily. TJ swatted her shoulder.“Shut up! I don’t even know if he’s into guys, let alone if he’d be into me” TJ groaned, resenting the pulling feeling in his chest. He hadn’t really admitted anything to himself out loud.“That’s true. You are stinky” Amber’s nose crinkled up. TJ glared at her and she cackled before saying innocently, “Maybe, he likes stinky.”“I’m done having this conversation” TJ grumbled, walking out and bending down to pick up his shoes and baggage.“Night, Teddy!” Amber sang from the other room.TJ huffed, taking two steps of the stairs at a time, before entering his room. It was slightly messy but not as disastrous as it could be. He flopped onto his bed, not bothering to take off his sweaty uniform. He pulled out his phone and a few notifications popped up, mostly from twitter. He was slightly disappointed to not have gotten a message from Cyrus.He sat from a moment, his thumbs hovering over the keyboard before sending Cyrus a text.Teej <3: hey underdog how were the milkshakes?TJ put his phone down, closing his eyes momentarily. A little over a minute later, his screen lit up with a ding.Underdog ^-^: grt! I had 3 to myself. Buffy & Andi think I have a problem lol
Teej <3: Nahhh lol. You’re a growing boy
Underdog ^-^: Tell me why I’m still 5’4 then smhTJ chuckled; he found how short Cyrus was totally endearing.Teej <3: You still got time to grow dw… btw um I wanted to ask you something.
Underdog ^-^: Ha! Says the one who’s almost 6 ft & what's up?
Teej <3: I’m like 5’9, that’s hardly 6 ft lol
Teej <3: but did you hear what Reed told me
Underdog ^-^: Not when it happened but Buffy filled me in. I’m sorry TJ
Teej <3: you’re sorry?! I should be the one who’s sorry for not killing him
Underdog ^-^: i’m really glad you didn’t. Don’t get in trouble because of me... it’s not worth it. I’m sorry that he even said that to you.
Teej <3: of course it’s worth it. He said that disgusting word Cy. I couldn’t not do anything.
Underdog ^-^: well… thank you for defending me. Maybe try not to get so violent next time lol
Teej <3: right, no promises tho :)
Underdog ^-^: ugh whatever smh
Underdog ^-^: i’m pretty tired so I’m calling it a night. Being cute and drinking milkshakes is exhausting stuff
Teej <3: yeah i bet lol
Teej <3: good night Underdog. Sleep well.
Underdog ^-^: You too. seriously I don’t want to see zombie Teej again tomorrow
Teej <3: again, no promises :)TJ put his phone back down, smiling to himself. He breathed deeply and then sniffed repeatedly, being suddenly overwhelmed with a pungent odor. He smelled the inside of his shirt. Whoa, he mentally exclaimed, maybe I am stinky. With that, TJ rolled off his bed, grabbed a clean pair of sweats and made his way to the shower. -*-The universe decided to take mercy on TJ; he slept the whole night through, his sweet dreams full of the feverish events that were to come. Sadly, TJ wouldn’t remember them in the morning.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Even chocolate and all its delicious glory can’t dull my pain, Buff” Cyrus slumped down in the booth, glumly slurping his milkshake through a green straw. The boy and his best friend sat in their usual spot at The Spoon, treating themselves to their regular tradition of after school milkshakes and baby taters. The rest of the gang weren’t available; Jonah had ultimate practice, and Andi was out with Bex shopping for yarn. Apparently, her new artsy pursuit was taking up knitting, which earned her a fair amount of light-hearted ridicule from everyone. Needless to say, it was just Buffy and Cyrus today, which did have its perks. Despite her frustrating stubbornness at times, the curly headed girl was his favorite person to pass the time with, apart from his parents… and maybe TJ. “Cyrus,” Buffy blinked at the boy a few times, tight lipped, “You got a B+; it’s really not the end of the world”. This statement of rationality only encouraged Cyrus to be more dramatic. The boy pressed his palms into his cheekbones and swept up to his temples, rubbing in big circle motions. “I’ve never gotten anything less than an A in English -- especially not on a Comprehension Test! I’m losing serious bragging points here.”“Is this about who I think it is?” Buffy groaned.“If you mean TJ, then yes” Cyrus’ face resembled that of an angry puppy, “How am I supposed to dethrone the King of Literature with a B+?” The ring of the bell at the front door of the diner sounded then, but Cyrus was too busy fuming and mentally scolding himself for not making flashcards to notice. Buffy fondly rolled her eyes, “Of all things to be competitive about, of course you’d choose something so nerdy.” Cyrus glared at her, his eyes sparkling with playful retaliation. He opened his mouth to respond when a hand patted his shoulder. The boy jumped slightly at the unexpected touch, and his kittenish glower faltered to a smile for a moment at the sight of laughing green eyes. Still, Cyrus’ feisty mood at his so-called failure was here to stay so the angry puppy returned once again. “Woah there, Underdog! Someone’s grumpy,” TJ quipped, sliding into the booth beside him and raising his hand to pinch at the other boy’s cheek. Cyrus batted him away but couldn’t help the giggle that slipped out of from his lips. Curses, he mentally grumbled, scrunching up his nose at his best friend. TJ simply shrugged and stuck out his tongue like a leopard gecko. Buffy scoffed from the other side of the booth, “If you guys are gonna flirt, I’m going home.” This commented earned a deep frown from the brunette, his cheeks tinted with red. To his relief, TJ rolled his eyes, seemingly unfazed, “Seriously though, what’s with Grumpy Goodman?” Cyrus huffed a breath, reluctant to respond, “If I tell you, you promise not to rub it in my face?”“Underdog, of course I won’t. I’m not petty,” TJ smirked down at him but raised his eyes and eyebrows at Buffy. “That’s rich coming from you after yesterday,” the basketball player snarked, but her voice had a sarcastic fondness it always did with her captain.“He did say he was sorry,” Cyrus offered. “Yeah well, as long as he doesn’t forget about our deal.”“Oh, I haven’t. I’ve already made arrangements for the first task,” TJ swiftly grabbed a couple of baby taters and popped them in his mouth. “What arrangements, Tater Jacker Kippen?” Cyrus queried. “Really, Cy? Tater Jacker? I thought you were better than that,” TJ poked the boy’s side, “And, that’s for me to know and for you to soon find out.” Buffy and Cyrus exchanged an amused look, but before Cyrus had a chance to press on, Buffy took the opportunity to change the subject, “Anyway, please reason with our boy here. He’s the only person I know who’d be upset at a B+” TJ’s signature smirk made another appearance as he processed this information, “a B+ you say?” Cyrus’ façade of indignation was replaced with something more coy, “Yeah I got an 89 on the Brave New World test.” “That’s great, Cy!” TJ praised the boy, who smiled shyly at him. “Thanks,” Cyrus’ nose turned pink, “How did you do?” TJ was playfully boastful by nature, especially around the likes of Buffy, but his response was nonchalant “a 97.”“You were the top score?!” Cyrus shrieked in both awe and slight envy. Even Buffy seemed impressed. “Yeah but don’t tell anyone. I can’t let it mess up my street cred,” He joked, puffing up his chest. “Oh, you’re right! No one finds a literature sap intimidating” It was Cyrus’ turn to poke the jock’s stomach, trying not to linger on the thought of how firm his side was. There was a time when he found TJ to be the most intimidating jock at Jefferson, but nowadays, he was hardly worthy of his Not-So-Scary-Basketball-Guy nickname. TJ was the one who willingly played chess with Cyrus for seven hours straight to cheer him up when he had caught a cold. He was the one who baked him a batch of chocolate, chocolate chip muffins for Cyrus’ last birthday. He was the one who made the smaller boy’s cheeks ache from laughing, regardless of what kind of day it was, good or bad. However intimidating TJ Kippen was to people at school, Cyrus was one of the few people who knew how much of a softie he truly was. “Oh please. They’ll be cowering in fear at the sight of these bad boys!” TJ raised his arms and flexed, smiling smugly. Cyrus admired the lean muscle that popped up from under the jock’s t-shirt sleeve. He quickly averted his eyes, nibbling on his lower lip. “Those have nothing on these guns” Buffy flexed herself, the muscles of her arms equally impressive, yet they didn’t have the same effect on the brunette. “You guys are absolutely ridiculous,” Cyrus commented, shaking his hand at the pair of them fondly. The trio continued to munch on taters and sip their milkshakes, groaning about the pile of upcoming assignments and tests that filled each of their laps. Buffy and Cyrus were in the middle of complaining about how stressful the pH lab in their Life Science class was, which they were partners in, when the girl got a text summoning her home. Before she said her rushed goodbyes, she demanded that TJ get her best friend home safely, who replied with a nod and a wink. She threw him a pointed look before walking out of The Spoon, the bell ringing with a farewell. Despite Cyrus’ resistance, TJ covered their bill and pulled him from the booth and into the nippy night, the sky becoming darker as dusk fell. They walked for a few moments in silence; Cyrus was a bit distracted with hiding the obvious chattering of his teeth. “Here,” TJ held up his light blue hoodie to the boy, “Take it before you get hypothermia.”“B-but, aren’t you cold?” Cyrus argued half-heartedly; his skin was crawling at the sight of the warm fabric. “Nah, I’m not even wearing it,” TJ stopped walking then and took off Cyrus’ backpack, who stared up at him like he had grown antennas, “I can’t continue with my life knowing you might get sick.” He gingerly placed the opening of the hoodie over the brunette’s head, his fingers grazing the sides of the boy’s face to stop the fabric from swallowing him whole. The boy pushed his arms through their designated holes and looked up brightly at TJ, who ruffled his already mussed hair. The hoodie was at least two sizes too big for Cyrus, but it was the most adorable sight TJ had ever seen. His stomach bubbled with pride at the sight of Cyrus adorned in fabric that read Jefferson Middle School Basketball in bold white letters. “Cute,” He smirked down at the boy but didn’t catch Cyrus’ fierce blushing as he began walking again, “Want me to carry your bag?” “N-no, I got it”. Cyrus slung his book bag over his shoulder, a smile he reserved only for TJ gracing his lips, “Thanks.” TJ returned the sweet, secret smile and wrapped his arm around the boy’s shoulder. Their steps fell in sync with each other’s but each boy was too distracted with racing thoughts to notice. Cyrus loved TJ’s not-so-rare gestures of affection. He sunk into the warmth of the embrace, leaning closer into TJ’s side as they continued on. The silence they walked in was comfortable, peaceful, but as the final orange and pink rays faded out from the horizon and the lights of Shadyside’s downtown illuminated the streets, Cyrus’ pulse quickly sped up. He couldn’t escape how romantic the whole setting felt, and he resisted the urge to snuggle his head into the crook between TJ’s neck and shoulder. Cyrus wasn’t naïve to how different their friendship felt; yet, he argued that he didn’t have much experience with having ‘bros’ to know what was considered normal. He appreciated how easy it was to be friends with TJ, that he didn’t have to try so hard to be cool. TJ stuck around, despite how much Cyrus constantly rambled and how often he blurted out random facts about random things. His chest kindled warmly when he thought about what TJ meant to him. He knew his feelings for TJ weren’t exactly platonic, albeit he tried and failed miserably to squash them like a bug. He couldn’t; no, he wouldn’t allow himself to repeat another Jonah Beck situation. The jock was obviously straight, and the little gestures of affection he directed towards the brunette were done out of friendship... Still, pesky hope blossomed in his chest as TJ beamed down at him, his eyes glittering under the streetlamps. “So... you busy Saturday?”“Um, S-Saturday?” Cyrus pretended to check some mental calendar, “Nope, Saturday is all clear. I mean, not that I have no life, it’s just that, I, um -- never mind, why? What’s up?” TJ chuckled at Cyrus’ rambling, pulling him closer, “I have plans for our first task remember?” “Oh, right! Can I know what they are now?”“Nope” TJ said, exaggerating the pop of the ‘p’, “You’ll find out soon enough.”“That does nothing for my nerves” Cyrus whined, feeling his stomach flip anxiously. Some of the things on his list were more extreme than others. “Don’t worry, Underdog. I started off with something,” TJ thought for a moment, “tame.”“I sure hope you’re right”. Cyrus looked up unsurely at the other boy, who was already grinning down at him in mischievously. The brunette gulped, suddenly feeling the weight of the whole situation. What had he gotten himself into?-*- “This is your idea of tame?!” Cyrus exclaimed in slight horror, studying the scaly creature squirming up over a log behind the barrier of glass. The brunette sat on his knees in front of a glass cage that hosted a large slithering rust and white patterned corn snake, regretting his trust in TJ’s judgement. When the athlete picked him up that Saturday morning from his father's house, he still refused to reveal what their first mission of the list would be. Cyrus tried to remain optimistic as they walked through a neighboring cul-de-sac, passing by a collection of homes he didn’t recognize. They were in the middle of debating whether Ray Bradbury was justified in his ending of Brave New World when TJ announced that they finally had reached their destination. The boys stood outside a quaint brick home, the front yard speckled with purple and blue flowers. Cyrus trailed closely behind the jock as they walked up the cobblestone path and then up the stairs. The blonde knocked a few times on the door and a few seconds later it was swung open by a boy about their age that Cyrus recognized from the basketball team. “Hey Teej!” The basketball players ‘bro-hugged’ then, and the nameless boy turned to smile warmly at the brunette, “And you must be Cyrus. I’m Marty!” “Marty?” Cyrus looked up him, whose smile oddly resembled Dopey from Snow White, “Oh, Marty! I’ve heard of you!” “Really?” the boy asked incredulously, a half smile tugging on his lips, “From who?”“My friend Buffy always complains about this guy Marty on the team,” Cyrus recounted through a laugh, “says that you make bad dad jokes and you’re clumsy.” Marty resemblance quickly switched from Dopey to Bashful, his hand rubbing the nape of his neck, “Driscoll talks about me?” Before he could respond, TJ chuckled from his side and walked through the front door, beckoning Cyrus to follow him, who complied, “Marty’s completely whipped for her.”“I am not!” Marty countered, his eyebrows furrowed as he shut the door behind him. “And I’m not bad at math,” TJ jested. “Oh, fuck off! you’re sure one to talk man-- Ow!” Marty shrieked, rubbing the side where TJ had elbowed him. TJ glared at him, and the other boy just huffed, putting up his hands in mock surrender and turned to a confused Cyrus. “Just, um, don’t tell her I asked about her, yeah?” Cyrus mimed closing an invisible zipper on his lips “My lips are sealed.” “Great!” Marty’s dopey grin returned, and TJ and Cyrus smiled at each other knowingly. “So are you’re here to meet Nag, right?” “Who?” “Nag, my snake!” He said like it was the most obvious thing in the world, “Come on, I’ll show you.” Marty beamed before skittering through his nicely furnished living room and down a hallway, TJ and Cyrus following closely behind him. The boys sat on Marty’s floor, circling around the snake cage that was positioned on the farther side of the room under a window. Apparently, Nag was short for Nagini, the name of Marty’s cold-blooded pet. Cyrus gulped at the creature, fully remembering that “hold a live snake” was written towards the middle of his list. Nagini wasn’t the largest or most fearsome snake he’d ever seen; he had watched a boa constrictor swallow a lemur whole on the Discovery Channel once but somehow seeing a snake in person for the first time was more vividly frightening than anything he’d ever seen on TV. “Don’t worry, Underdog” TJ scooted closer to the smaller boy, wrapping his arm his shoulders, “Nag isn’t venomous.” The boy’s gaze didn’t shift from Nagini, who was now sizing up a small white mouse that darted helplessly around the bottom of the cage. “She’s about to have her lunch anyway,” Marty tried to come off as comforting, “She won’t have any room in her stomach for ya”. This didn’t make Cyrus feel better though. He tensed up as he watched the mouse cower in a corner, Nagini slithering towards her prey. Cyrus felt a certain kinship with the furry rodent and flinched as the snake thrusted towards it. As if on cue, TJ started asking him questions about reptiles, obviously trying to distract the boy from the bleak scene.“How is that someone who loves reptiles so much is terrified of them?” TJ teased, although his gaze was consoling. His attempts where working, Cyrus looked at him with a giggle, turning his head away right as Nagini’s jaw opened wide. “I like a lot of things in theory,” Cyrus winced, “in practice, though, not so much.”“Don’t worry, dude” Marty patted the brunette’s back, “Nag really is harmless.” “Not if you’re the rat” Cyrus’ smile fell a bit. “Touché,” Marty shrugged, “Cycle of life, I guess” “Yeah,” Cyrus’ bottom lip stuck out a bit, his eyebrows pressing together. TJ placed his hand on top of Cyrus’ smaller one that rested on his thigh, offering him a sympathetic smile. Cyrus’ expression lifted then, and he looked back at the scaly thing, who was now in the process of digestion. As bad as he felt for the mouse, Cyrus had to admit that Nagini was pretty awesome.“I guess I could overlook Nagini’s feral ways” Cyrus huffed, a smile in his words. TJ looked down at him fondly, rubbing his thumb against the boys’ knuckles. The snake owner cleared his throat, and TJ met his gaze. Marty wore a smug smile on his lips, and he raised his eyebrows at TJ and then at Cyrus, who was still mesmerized by the corn snake, and then finally at their connected hands. TJ throw him a pointed look, a light blush dusting his cheeks, and Marty only winked before clapping his hands together, "So! Are you ready to get acquainted with the beast?” “Uh, as ready as I’ll ever be” Cyrus said weakly, fear bubbling up in his stomach. Marty stood up and leaned over to the cage, taking off the top and cautiously lead his hands to where Nagini was. He swooped up the snake, letting her wrap around his forearm and held her out towards the other boys. Cyrus gulped, backing up closer to TJ, who was staring at the snake in admiration. He didn’t share the same passion for reptiles as Cyrus, but Nagini was a badass pet. “I’ll go first,” TJ smiled at the panicked Cyrus and held out his arm towards Marty, who gently handed the animal to his captain. Like with Marty, Nag wrapped herself around TJ’s forearm, causing him to laugh, the snake’s skin gliding against his own tickled. Cyrus relaxed as he watched TJ play with the reptile, resembling a toddler enthralled with a newborn kitten. The blonde noticed Cyrus’ more placate state and motioned the snaked towards him, “You wanna have a go?” The smaller boy hesitated to respond, the fear in his stomach faded slightly but still softly bubbled. TJ grinned at him encouragingly. “You can do this, Underdog; I’ll be right here the entire time. If Nag tries any funny business, she’ll have to deal with me,” TJ threatened teasingly. Marty scoffed, but his face was soft at the anxious boy, looking at him expectantly. Cyrus looked back one more time at TJ’s encouraging smile and nodded. The jock excitedly grabbed at Cyrus’ hand with the one that wasn’t overtaken by Nagini and he slowly slide the snake onto Cyrus’ palm, never breaking eye contact with the boy. The brunette sharply gasped as Nagini coiled herself around his skin, feeling goosebumps pop up on his arm. How Steve Irwin dealt with snakes and other reptiles on the daily completely eluded Cyrus. Although Nagini’s touch was scaly and cold, he quickly got used to it, and the fear in his stomach subsided to swirling pride. “I did it, Teej!” he announced triumphantly, leaning into his friend so they could admire the creature together. TJ sweetly cooed comments of praise and veneration into his ear for finishing the first task, and Marty shook his head at the sight before him, grinning cheekily. Who knew two dudes and a snake could be so cute?-*- After a good while longer passing around Nagini until they got bored, the boys argued about which video game from Marty’s extensive collection they’d play first. Unsurprisingly, TJ eventually let Cyrus choose, who held up a case that read Guitar Hero III: Legends of Rock. “You’re on fire today, Underdog!” Teej cheered, watching Cyrus shred on a perfect streak. Cyrus smirked, keeping his eyes on the screen as “Reptilia” by the Strokes blared out through the speaks of Marty’s TV. As uncoordinated as Cyrus usually was, he was mysteriously good at Guitar Hero, only playing on levels Hard and Expert most days. Today, he played on Expert. “Who knew Goodman was a rock god?” Marty watched Cyrus’ fingers press swiftly on the colored buttons in genuine awe. He was decent at the game, but games like Call of Duty was definitely more up his alley. TJ, on the other hand, stared at Cyrus, his jaw hanging loose. He had no clue of this secret talent that Cyrus possessed. He himself had virtually no talent with video games like this, deciding years ago that games like The Sims were more his forte. Cyrus’ tongue poked out from his lips, his face contorted slightly in concentration to stay on his perfect streak until the end of the song, TJ’s noises of wonder keeping him motivated. He loved when he was able to impress the jock. He fell back limply on the bean bag chair beside TJ once the “You Rock!” came onto the screen, their knees touching. “Who’s next?” he held up the guitar in the air, it wobbling a bit under his exhausted grip. “No way am I following that” TJ grinned, turning back to look at the boy on the bed, “You got Smash, M?” “I’m offended that you even had to fucking ask” Marty scoffed, pulling out Super Smash Bros from his shelf and swapping the other game out in the CD slot. He sat back down on his spot on the bed, waiting for the main menu to load. Cyrus took the moment of silence as an opportunity to bring up something from earlier, “So, Marty…” he trailed off, unsure of how to bring this up subtly without freaking the other boy out. TJ raised his eyebrows at Cyrus both in confusion and amusement. “You do like Buffy, right?” Well, so much for being subtle. Marty sputtered, caught off guard, “Uh, shit I-I mean… what’s not to like? Y-You know? She’s got pretty hair -- she’s cool, too, but like she’s one of the guys, kinda. Well, not really, she’s way hotter-- you know what never mind, I...I do.” TJ and Cyrus exchanged looks of bewilderment before doubling over in a fit of laughter. Marty’s face turned a shade of red deeper than the plaid of his shirt.“Nice word vomit there, man. Very eloquent,” TJ teased, his smirk exposing his teeth. Marty surged towards him, whacking his shoulder harshly. Cyrus was still doubled over giggling, clenching his chest, his eyes squinted and his face flushed from the lack of oxygen. “That… was… epic,” Cyrus exclaimed in between laughs, whipping tears of joy from his cheek. “Did that question have a point?” Marty groaned, embarrassed as hell.“Yeah, actually,” Cyrus finally collected himself, “I didn’t mean to put you on the spot, but uh, a group of us are going to The Lagoon next weekend, and I want to invite you. Buffy will be there.” He added the last part while wiggling his eyebrows. Marty’s dopey smile returned once again, “It’s fine,” He took a moment of fake consideration, “Count me in!” “Docious!” TJ exclaimed, grinning cheekily at Cyrus who looked at him in mock outrage. The smaller boy pushed his shoulder, before grabbing the remote controller and shoving it towards TJ’s chest, “I play winner.” -*- After a few more hours of video gaming and gorging themselves on the pizza Marty’s mom bought for lunch, TJ and Cyrus began walking back in the direction of Cyrus’ street. They spent a good chunk of their day at Marty’s, and now it was late afternoon. Neither one was ready to say goodbye just then, although they didn’t say so out loud.Still on a high of confidence from conquering his fear of Nagini, Cyrus offered a solution, “You wanna go to our… secret spot?” Cyrus’ voice ducked in volume, his eyes searching around to see if any bystanders were eavesdropping. TJ snorted at the spectacle, “It’s a swing set at a public park, Underdog, no some top secret lair.” Without giving a yes or no, he steered their path in the direction of the park. “It is a top secret lair, Teej. We do all the important talking there: current events, plans of world domination, our stuff.” Cyrus’ tone had a groundbreaking edge to it. “You dork,” TJ teased, seeing the park come into view, “Come on”. He clasped his hand down onto the other boy's, pulling him hurriedly towards their usual getaway. The boys separated once they reached the swings, much to Cyrus' dismay. It was starting to get cold, and his skin yearned for the fleeting warmth of TJ’s grasp. He pushed the thought away as he clutched the cool metal of the chains and began pumping his legs up and down. TJ was already swinging highly, giggling to himself as wind rushed by his ears. “Come up here before I come down there and push you.” TJ scolded Cyrus playfully. The brunette stuck out his tongue but did as he told, knowing from past experience that TJ was serious. These days though, Cyrus wasn’t scared to swing high anymore, and he knew the reason why.“Thanks,” he blurted out suddenly and then grew embarrassed from his random outburst, “For today, I mean… I couldn’t have done it without you there.”TJ stopped swinging then, his momentum slowing down as he turned to look at the boy swinging softly beside him, “It’s nothing I did, Underdog. You were brave all by yourself.” “That’s not true!” Cyrus ducked his head at the zealousness of his tone, “You make me brave… because you believe in me.” He averted his eyes down, suddenly feeling very exposed but snuck a glance at boy at his side. TJ was sitting completely still now on his swing, staring intently at Cyrus, painted on his face was a smile as big as the Cheshire Cat’s. “We make a good pair” TJ beamed, “Forget about half of the list; we’ll be done with the entire thing by summer.” Cyrus’ stomach flipped, loving how TJ referred to them as a pair. “I don’t know about that,” Cyrus smiled back at the blonde, “I don’t think I can pull off writing an entire screenplay in three months.” “Ah well, we have our entire life to get through the ‘harder’ things” TJ mused. Cyrus heart skipped a beat. Their entire life? Meaning them, together? No, that couldn’t be it, but what exactly did that mean? Sure, he wanted them to be friends for life; it already felt like he had known TJ forever, but he never knew TJ shared the same sentiment. Or… did he mean it in the other way? A faint smile danced on Cyrus’ lips as he pictured them snuggle close on the patio of a beautiful town house, old and gray and married for years and years, doing the crossword together. His entire body tingled, feeling the realization closing in on him slowly like a wave and then strike him all at once. He knew what this feeling meant, but he was way too afraid to admit it to himself, even in the solidarity of his own mind, in fear that the wave would pull him under and drag him too far out to sea. “Yeah, I suppose you’re right” Cyrus whispered, a lump growing in his throat from both overwhelming joy and fear. He kicked his legs in the air to be on level with the boy swinging to his side, savoring the bittersweet taste of the moment. -*- Just before it got dark outside, TJ returned Cyrus home, promising to text him later. Both boys didn’t want the day to end, but it really wasn’t over. TJ complained about the significant amount of Algebra 1 homework waiting to be completed, and Cyrus urged him to leave right away before he gave him a lecture on the importance of not procrastinating. Before he left, TJ smugly told him that it could wait until tomorrow, and he had better things to do with his night, like binge watching episodes of The Office. After recapping his day to his dad and step-mom, Cyrus sat at his desk now, hunching over his own homework, his dim room lit up by a single reading lamp by his side. He hoped that TJ was doing the same thing but perhaps situated in a more comfortable position. He sighed, taking out his phone to send his best friend a message. Underdog <3: You better not be watching Netflix rn mister. He was about to place his phone down and get back to the polarity of molecules when his phone chirped at him. Teej ^-^: Yes, DAD, I know. amber’s in here helping me with polynomials… whatever those areCyrus smiled down at the message, shaking his head fondly. Underdog <3: I’m a good influence then huh? ;-) Teej ^-^: Good in this context is subjective underdog. I’m missing out on dwight Underdog <3: You’ll survive :)Underdog <3: anyway, I should stop being a distraction Teej ^-^: but I like being distracted ;) Underdog <3: ._.Teej ^-^: okaaay fine fine I’m sure you have your own hw Teej ^-^: Talk tomorrow? Underdog <3: Absolutely. Night teej Teej ^-^: Sweet dreams shredder Cyrus leaned back into his desk chair, unwilling to continue reading the chapter of his science book any longer. He stretched out his arms and left them fall limply to his sides, thinking over the events of that day. He felt a spark of an idea come on, and he opened the front drawer of desk, searching for his ideal use of writing utensil: his favorite pink pen. He flipped open the notebook that he was taking notes in to the backside, where the original copy of his list was hidden away. He looked it over, feeling the familiar lump of emotions forming again in his throat. On a clean sheet of paper, he wrote out a title in large swirly pink letters. On the first line of the page, he wrote “Do the crossword together” followed by “in fifty years” written in parentheses. Cyrus studied his handiwork, deciding it was sufficient before moving the notebook away to the side, returning his attention back to the paragraph he left off at in his textbook. At the top of the new page of his notebook, large print written in pink ink read “The Bucket List Part 2: TJ Edition” and title was embellished with a small pink heart on each side.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
On Sunday mornings, Cyrus favored waking up to blissful silence, sunlight streaming in through the cracks between his blinds and falling on his face to create a warm orangish glow from beneath his eyelids. This Sunday morning, however, provided a hiccup in his usual routine of peace when he heard an insistent knocking. He raised his head, looking around with eyes half-open, still sleep drunk. He had half a mind to fall back into his pillow with a thud when another round of knocking emitted from his window. His eyes practically popped out of his head once he processed the image of a golden boy crouched on a branch from the tree that grew by Cyrus’ side of the house, motioning for him to open the window. Cyrus jumped out of his skin as he leapt from his bed, bolting to the opposite side of the room and tripping over a stuffed animal in the process. He mustered what little strength he had and pulled up the window, cold air from the early morning instantly rippling through his hair. “TJ Kippen, Are you actually insane?!” Cyrus took a step away from the window, giving the other boy enough space to pull himself into the room, who did so with minimal effort. “I dunno, probably. That’s what Amber’s tried to convince me to think for years,” TJ supplied, a cheeky smile meeting Cyrus’ face of bewilderment. “Uh, yeah -- Well, don’t take this this the wrong way, but what exactly are you doing here, climbing up my tree, and giving me a heart attack at,” Cyrus snapped his head to look at the digital clock by his bed, “10:07 am?!” “You act like it’s the crack of dawn, Cy” TJ chuckled, walking to sit on the boy’s bed, “Cute PJs, by the way.” Cyrus looked down at his dress, a matching set of dinosaur patterned pajamas, and all the blood in his body rushed to his cheekbones. “...I don’t function on Sunday until like noon, at least, so this is the crack of dawn,” Cyrus huffed, purposely avoiding the boy’s last comment, “You do know I own a front door, right?” TJ snorted, “That’s so predictable! I like keeping you on your toes.” He smirked down at the boy, wiggling his eyebrows. Cyrus shoved his shoulder with his own as he sat beside him, still too groggy to deal with how fast his heart was beating. “I like standing flat on my feet, thank you very much,” Cyrus rolled his eyes, “and for what reason are you gracing my presence this morning?” “We have official Bucket List business to attend to today,” TJ explained like a CEO at a board meeting, “so ditch the dinos and get dressed.” “You can’t just spring this on to me last minute,” Cyrus flopped back on his bed, “I have homework to finish.”“Please, Underdog,” TJ whined, laying back beside the brunette, “It will only take a few hours, tops.” “Ugh! I don’t know, Teej. I have that stupid lab tomorrow with Buffy and a history test!” Cyrus argued in reluctance, throwing himself upward again. “I’ll buy you breakfast, anything you want! Pretty please!,” TJ sat up and took one of Cyrus’ hands, shaking it beseechingly. Cyrus was halfway convince at the mention of free food until TJ pouted his lips and batted his abundance of eyelashes, his green irises enormous and glistening from beneath them. “Fine,” Cyrus sighed exasperatedly, biting his lip and removing his hand from the blonde’s grasp, “Remind me to call Congress and ask them to outlaw puppy dog eyes.” TJ chuckled in victory, fist pumping the air, and the brunette shook his head, knowing he had been bested. He got up from his bed and pulled out a fresh change of clothes from his dresser and stood in the corner of his room. “Turn around,” He demanded shyly, and TJ obliged, flashing him a smirk before covering his eyes with his hands and twisting his entire body in the other direction. Cyrus quickly changed, trying to ignore that his literal crush was only a few feet away as he undressed and threw on an old pair of jeans, a sweater, and sneakers. He cleared his throat to signal that he was done, and TJ turned back, meeting him with another half smile. “Hey! Your sweater matches your helmet!” “Uh, helmet?” Cyrus instantly filled with familiar anxiety. “Mhmmm” TJ hummed, his eyes glinting with mischief as he shook the athletic bag wrapped around his shoulder, which Cyrus hadn’t even noticed was there until just then, “C’mon, Underdog, it’s adventure time!” Before he could respond, TJ got to his feet, and Cyrus grabbed his phone at his desk before being pulled swiftly out the door. The boys raced down the stairs hand-in-hand, and Cyrus’ anxiety subsided a bit, realizing that if things went like they did yesterday, he could handle what TJ had in store for them. He gripped onto the other boys hand tighter and was about to ask what the master plan of the day when his step-mom come out from the kitchen holding cleaning supplies.“Oh hello, TJ” Leslie smiled warmly, unsurprised to see him, “I didn’t hear you come in.” She lifted a questioning eyebrow.“Good morning, Dr. Goodman,” TJ greeted her sheepishly, “You know me, stealthy as ever.”“Hm, I guess so,” she smirked at him knowingly, “Where are you boys off to today?” She glanced down at their interlaced fingers, and Cyrus let go of TJ’s hand like his touch had burnt him. Leslie didn’t comment on that or the boys’ similarly crimson faces, much to Cyrus’ relief. He could practically feel the awkwardness in the room suffocating him, but he didn’t understand why. Friends hold hands all the time, Cyrus thought, and while it definitely was different from swinging his hands with Buffy, he wasn’t sure why he suddenly felt like he was being examined under a magnifying glass. “Uh, w-we were just heading to the park, Mrs. G,” the taller boy answered, his voice the most nervous Cyrus had ever heard it, which was surprising coming from the athlete with boundless confidence. If his mother had noticed this as well, she didn’t show it, “Well, that’s fine. Just make sure to wear a jacket, Cyrus. And seriously, TJ? How many times do I have to tell you to call me Leslie?” “Last time’s a charm?” TJ’s natural charisma kick started again. “It better be,” Leslie teased, “Do you boys want breakfast before you leave?” “We got that covered already,” Cyrus answered, grinning at TJ expectantly, who nudged him playfully. “Feel free to come back for lunch then; I have my famous stew brewing on the burner.” “Will do,” Cyrus placed a quick peck on his step-mother’s cheek and turned to the coat rack to grab his heaviest jacket. The boys were halfway out the door when they heard Leslie call out, “Take care good care of him, TJ!”, earning a loud, dramatic groan from Cyrus. “Yes, ma’am!” TJ chuckled sweetly at Cyrus’ burning ears before pulling a navy helmet out of his duffel bag, “Put this on.”The brunette took it after a moment’s hesitation and was about to ask why when he saw a bike at the bottom of the steps, leaning against the side of the house. It was a vintage model, with a mint base and cream detailing, and despite looking like it time-traveled there from 1965, it seemed to hold up well enough. “Teej, there’s only one bike here.”“Ah, but this bike has a back seat” TJ grinned, taking the helmet out of Cyrus’ hands and placing it on his brown waves, clicking the strap into place. Cyrus only glared at him, “Now I’ll have helmet hair.”“Oh, you’ll live,” the blonde teased, pulling the bike upward and mounting the seat, “Now hop on.” Fortunately, bikes were not a foreign concept to Cyrus; it was his main mode of transportation on long summer escapades around town with Buffy and Andi. Yet, riding on the back of one seemed a lot more precarious without the sturdy grip of handlebars. He sat down on the seat, his slim frame wedged perfectly between the edge and TJ’s backside. “You’re gonna have to hold on tightly, Underdog,” TJ looked back at him, smirking once again. Cyrus simply nodded and wrapped his arms around the blonde’s waist, his head pressed into the fabric of TJ’s hoodie. His already hurried heartbeat accelerated as the athlete took off, pedaling with ease. Cyrus clung onto TJ for dear life, feeling like he was going to fall off at any second. The blonde laughed and reassured him that everything was fine, which did help the boy in the backseat to relax. He sunk into TJ’s warmth and looked up as they dashed by the neighborhood, leaves and petals from a strip of cherry blossom trees fluttering about them. The world blurred by, images of shops, restaurants, and Shadyside’s residents melting together. TJ slowed once they rounded a corner towards the downtown, and they halted in front of a little diner that was decorated with wood carvings of bears that reminded Cyrus of fishing. After chaining up the bike, TJ slung a lazy arm around the other boy, “I hope you’re in the mood for pancakes.” Cyrus beamed at him, the smell of cinnamon overtaking his senses as they walked through the glass doors, “I am always in the mood for pancakes.”-*- After much indecisiveness on Cyrus’ part, the boys sat in a booth towards the back of the diner, waiting for their orders to be served to them. Their waitress was a sweet mid-twenties woman with a pleasant face, despite the dark circles under her eyes and her slightly smudged make up. She came by briefly to refill their drinks but quickly scurried away to deal with her impatient customers. The place was packed, which made sense to Cyrus as it was a Sunday morning, filled to the brim with large, rowdy families and couples on breakfast dates. He watched a young couple on the side of their booth, smiling affectionately at each other as they shared a plate of French toast. Cyrus couldn’t help to feel a little wistful at the sight and looked back at his best friend, who was busying himself with the bread platter their waitress had left on the table. TJ met Cyrus’ gaze with a dopey smile, a piece of sourdough halfway in his mouth. Cyrus felt the pit of his stomach warm and instantly his feelings of wistfulness melted away. “Blueberry pancakes for you, handsome,” their waitress placed a hot plate in front of TJ, “and double chocolate chip for his date.” TJ, who had already dug into his meal, sputtered suddenly and erupted into a coughing fit, choking on a piece of blueberry. “T-Thank you, ma’am,” Cyrus met her with an expression halfway between a grimace and smile, “but this isn’t a date.”“Oh! My apologies, darlin’. I just assumed-” the waitress dark-rimmed eyes widened, “Hey kid, you need a glass of water or somethin’?” TJ, who was red in the face from coughing, croaked out a meek, “No, thank you.”“Well, if y'all need anything else, give me a holler,” the waitress smiled awkwardly at them, “Sorry again. Enjoy your meal.” Cyrus only nodded and watched her for a second as she walked to another table, nervously scratching the nape of his neck. He turned back to the blonde, who was stiffly sipping his milkshake, his face redder than its maraschino cherry. Cyrus had a feeling he mirrored the cherry’s color as well. “Uh,” He squeaked out, “C-Can we just pretend like that didn’t happen?” TJ nodded quickly but didn’t meet the brunette’s eyes. Some of the awkwardness subsided then, but they ate their pancakes in silence for a while, avoiding eye contact. “Cy,” TJ spoke up, his voice small, “I’ve been meaning to bring this up, but I… just didn’t know how.” He was looking at the other boy now, looking as vulnerable as the mouse in Marty’s cage. He looked even more so than the times they opened up to each other at the swing set, and all Cyrus wanted to do was to hold him and tell him that everything would be okay. “You can tell me anything, Teej. You know that right?” Cyrus cooed, placing his fork down and scooting closer to his friend, who didn’t protest to the close contact. “I feel really guilty for not asking before, you know in person, but what Reed said about you was not okay, at all. I feel like a really shitty friend for not making sure you’re okay sooner… What I mean is, are you okay?” He looked like he was anticipating an explosion or worse, tears. “Thank you for your concern, truly,” Cyrus hesitated before placing his hand on the jock’s forearm, “But… I think I’m okay. While I don’t like his choice of words, his opinion means nothing to me. The only opinions that count are the people who love me...That all that matters,” Initially, when Buffy had told Cyrus what Reed said at that practice, it stung; he wasn’t going to lie to himself, but he knew that he had the support of his friends. Even though he had only come out to Buffy and Andi, he had hope that the other people closest to him would be just as accepting, when the time came. He knew that there would be a few bad eggs who wouldn’t be as kind, and that honestly terrified him, but he tried not to dwell on that and decided to take life one step at a time.“It still doesn’t make it right though,” TJ became visibly angry, scowling at his pancakes, “Not only was it fucking offensive and rude, it was a bullshit lie.” Cyrus winced at the sharpness of the boy’s words. “Well, Buffy already had me report it to Principal Metcalf.” Cyrus mustered up a weak smile, “Reed will get what he deserves.”TJ scoffed, “Ah well, if he so much as looks at you again; I might actually kill him next time.” Cyrus shot him a warning look. “At least let me talk to Coleman; I’ll get him kicked off the team myself,” TJ simpered to himself and moved his hand to down to softly squeeze Cyrus’, “I don’t want anyone talking shit about you.” Cyrus only nodded, picking at his plate with his fork. Reed’s comment was a lie; he wasn’t TJ’s boyfriend nor was he that word. But Cyrus was, well... gay, and Buffy helped him see that there was nothing wrong with that. He knew that he was no different, but that didn’t help him quell his fear that people would see him differently after they found out. He could handle being known as the laughably unathletic kid who dressed like a grandpa and made bad puns and was cursed to be awkward for the rest of his life, but what he couldn’t handle was being called a freak or names even worse. He liked his ability to blend in with a crowd and the thought of being thrown judgmental glances and hearing off-hand comments in the halls at school made him want to eject himself into the sun.But worst of all, he was afraid of how the boy to his side would feel about it. The boy who played chess with him, baked him muffins, had an uncanny ability to make him happy, all the time. Could TJ possibly hate him? Would he lose his friendship? He couldn’t even allow himself to imagine the possibility that TJ was also like him and returned his affections-- no, that was definitely wishful thinking, but maybe it wasn’t completely unrealistic to hope that his friend would still want to stick around if he knew his biggest secret of all, the one he ached and anguished to share with him. Maybe now was the to share that secret. His hands began to sweat, part of himself overcome with fear that TJ would walk out of the diner in disgust if he came out then, but as he looked at the boy, who smiled at him tenderly and squeezed his hand again, and Cyrus felt courage overtaking his fear. “Teej-” “And here’s your check, boys” their waitress cut him off, “No rush.” TJ nodded gratefully towards her, and Cyrus felt his building courage dwindle to nothing as she walked away. “What were you saying, Underdog?” TJ’s light eyebrows furrowed together.“I-I just wanted to say… um, thank you again for sticking up for me,” Cyrus said hesitantly. He decided that there would be another opportunity to speak up, and maybe it would be in more private circumstances. Maybe just maybe, he would be braver, then. “Always,” TJ grinned at him sincerely, and Cyrus’ heart kindled. “Always.” -*- The rest of breakfast continued normally, TJ teasing Cyrus about his secret knowledge of their next task on the list and refusing to tell him what that was, claiming that it was meant to be a surprise, and that Cyrus knowing beforehand would only make him anxious. Cyrus resented this, but he let it go, hoping it would be something pleasant, something that wouldn’t result in injury or humiliation. They were back on the bike now, after TJ paid for their pancakes and guided him out of the restaurant. Cyrus was more at ease as they coasted through the city for the second time and enjoyed being snuggled up to the athlete’s backside without the added distraction of terror. He even allowed himself to yell out a few cheers of happiness as they sped through the streets, TJ chuckling heartily in front of him as he pedaled. They descended into a part of town that Cyrus wasn’t as familiar with and slowed once they came to a long strip of grass and trees, in the middle was a playground and on the side was an outdoor roller rink. “Surprise!” TJ called in delight, turning back to grin at Cyrus once they came to a stop. Cyrus didn’t even know Shadyside had a roller rink.Truthfully, he terrified of roller skating, but he was actually excited for today’s task. Roller skating had always looked so fun in the movies, and although he didn’t have great experiences with ice skating, he prayed that he’d have more luck on concrete than ice. “I don’t even have skates with me, Teej. I’m not even sure I own any.” “No need to fret, Underdog. Your deviously handsome friend has saved the day,” TJ smirked cockily at him, “Turns out you and Amber wear the same size so she’s letting me… borrow hers.”“Borrow, huh?” Cyrus wrinkled up his nose, “Are you sure you didn’t steal them?” “I’ll answer no further questions without an attorney present,” TJ attempted to deadpan but a playful smile overtook his lips, “Now, let’s put them on! We’re burning daylight.” After they walked down a set of concrete stairs, He directed them over to a bench just outside the rink and unzipped his duffel bag, taking out two pairs of black roller skates, one with blue wheels and the other with red. He handed Cyrus the pair with blue wheels, as well as a set of knee and elbow pads. “I don’t need knee pads; I’m not five!” Cyrus scoffed. TJ looked down at him with an incredulous expression, a challenging smirk on his lips that translate to “better safe than sorry.” Cyrus huffed and crossed his arms, and TJ chuckled, getting up from the bench and squatting down on the floor beside him. “What are you doing?” Cyrus questioned, his eyebrow raising in curiosity. “You’re too slow,” TJ teased and stuck out his tongue at the brunette before looking down and reaching out to take off Cyrus’ shoes. Flustered and completely caught off guard, Cyrus swatted the jock’s hands away, pulling off his own sneakers. TJ chuckled and handed him the knee pads, and Cyrus pulled them on over his jeans onto each knee and then slipped on the roller skates, which surprising molded onto his feet like they were his all along. Before he could protest, TJ tied the laces of his skates and got up to put on his own. A minute later, they were both on their feet, TJ gripping onto Cyrus’ forearms to keep him balanced as he got used to standing on wheels. “Okay, Cy. The trick is not overthink this, which I know is nearly impossible for you,” TJ grinned cheekily, “The first thing you do is relax. You need to keep yourself loose and your knees slightly bent.” Cyrus obliged, trying to ignore his nerves as he sunk his hips towards the floor, “Now the trick isn’t to move forward with your feet but let your hips lead you side to side,” TJ gently placed his hands on Cyrus’ waist, looking into the brunette’s eyes for approval. Cyrus swallowed thickly and nodded, and TJ guided his hips from side to side with his hands, allowing Cyrus to get a feel for the motion of transferring his weight. His heart was beating a mile a minute, and his cheeks felt like they had been baked in an oven, but he forced himself to remain concentrated on TJ’s directions, instead of how weak in the knees he felt at TJ’s touch and proximity. “Ready for a demonstration?” TJ released his grip on the smaller boy, to his dread. “Not really,” he said, struggling to maintain his balance.“You got this, Underdog,” TJ laughed through his smirk, “Okay, watch me.” He slide backwards to create distance between then and then strode over slowly to Cyrus, allowing the brunette to watch his movements. “Okay you’re turn,” the athlete instructed once he reach the other boy “Do everything I said to do and roll towards me” TJ backed away several feet away from him and held out his hands, like a parent teaching their child how to walk. “W-What if I fall?” Cyrus felt incredibly less confident once the jock had let go of him.“You won’t, Underdog” TJ’s smile was enough to encourage Cyrus’ first stride, furrowing his eyebrows in determination, and began shifting his body weight from side-to-side. A few strides were enough to slam him into the wall of a jock, and TJ pulled away and gripped his shoulders. “That was perfect, Cyrus!” TJ cheered, beaming at him and shaking his shoulders slightly. The smaller boy felt the pride he was becoming more acquainted with recently bubble in his stomach, grinning and cheering alongside the blonde. The boys repeated the same thing a few more times, the distance between them and Cyrus’ confidence in himself growing each time he successfully skated to TJ. After about twenty minutes, Cyrus was skating around with relative ease, but TJ kept their hands intertwined. Better safe than sorry, Cyrus mentally reasoned. The rink was relatively empty that day so the boys zoomed on the concrete without fear of running into someone. When they weren’t chasing each other, TJ twirled Cyrus around like they were doing some sort of routine. Cyrus couldn’t remember a time he felt more free in his entire life, but their first time on the swings was definitely a close second. When TJ grasped both of Cyrus’ hands and they spun around each other, the smaller boy’s heart nearly took flight. He giggled like a maniac as he gazed at the blonde. The moment was absolutely exhilarating! After both boys have worked up a sweat, they took a break to gulp down the water bottles TJ had brought and sat on the edge of the rink, their shoulders touching. “It’s like looking in a mirror,” Cyrus giggled, holding up a picture of a clumsy giraffe in roller skates up to compare to TJ. The blonde swatted his phone away with a teasing snort, “I am way more graceful than that!” “Yeah, sure buddy,” Cyrus challenged with a smirk. TJ nudged him with his shoulder, taking another swig of water. Just then, Cyrus’ phone buzzed in his hand, and he opened up his screen to notifications from his group chat. The Buff: Hey guys! Up for baby taters in 30?Andi MacknCheese: Yes please! I SERIOUSLY need a milkshake break ;_;JB: I’m game :) Working on that history essay too Andiman?Andi MacknCheese: Yep! All weekend, it’s like Mr. Renworth is out to get us. The Buff: Let’s drown our sorrows in taters then. Wbu Cy?Cy-guy: love to… but I can’t guys… rain check? The Buff: Uh sure, where you at anyway?Cy-guy: i’m with TJ… we’re roller skatingThe Buff: TJ again?! Weren’t you just with him like yesterdayCy-guy: hey u have no right to be mad! we’re just carrying out your guys’ deal JB: Deal? What deal? Andi MacknCheese: I’ll tell you later Jonah JB: Docious!The Buff: Whatever, Cy. He better not hurt you. Cy-guy: he’s not Buffy istg! we already did something on the list. I held Nag at Marty’s yesterday! Andi MacknCheese: lol what’s a Nag?The Buff: MARTY?! I-Cy-guy: oop, TJ wants to skate again gtgThe Buff: CYRUS GOODMANCy-guy: loveuguystalktoulaterbye Before he allowed anyone else to reply, he turned off his screen and put his phone in his pocket. “Is something up, Underdog?” TJ looked down at Cyrus, who was chewing on the inside of his mouth. “Nah, Buffy’s just giving me the third degree” Cyrus chuckled dryly, “Y’know how she can be.”“Yeah, I really do,” TJ snorted, shaking his head, “Anyway, round two?” He shot Cyrus a devious grin, getting to his feet. He held out his hand to help the other boy up, who accepted it with his own challenging smile. “You’re on!” Cyrus sped past him, and TJ took off to chase him, laughing and trailing slightly behind. The boys were playing their luck now, attempting to skate down dips and railings that were built into the rink. Cyrus was feeling ballsy, a mixture of adrenaline and desire to impress the jock urging him to skate faster and more recklessly. “Hey Shredder, don’t get too cocky now!” TJ called out after him, his tone mocking but his eyes full of concern as he watched the brunette gain speed. “Pfft, I’m a pro!” Cyrus was fastly approaching another dip in the rink, the blonde at the bottom of it, and TJ’s eyes widened in fear. “Cyrus! Slow down-” But it was too late; Cyrus had lost his footing and lost control of his skates, skidding down the dip and crashing directly into the athlete. TJ fell to the ground on his back, luckily not hitting his head on the concrete, with Cyrus on top of him. “A pro, huh?”“Oh my gosh! I’m so sorry, Teej!” Cyrus lifted his head from TJ’s chest, staring at boy with frantic eyes, “A-Are you hurt? Are you bleeding? Quick, how many fingers am I holding up?” TJ laughed and patted the boy’s back, “I’m fine, Cy. My back broke my fall.” “I got a little ahead of myself there, huh?” Cyrus admitted sheepishly, his cheeks a shameful shade of red. “You think?,” TJ smirked, crinkling his eyes at the other boy. It didn’t occur to Cyrus until just then that he was still on top TJ, but as the boys gaped back each other, both in shock and in something else that Cyrus couldn’t place, he found it nearly impossible to tear his eyes away from TJ’s sage ones. Everything around them faded out, the green foliage surrounding the park, other skaters in the rink, the sounds of the busy street diminishing to silence. Cyrus’ breath hitched in his throat as TJ moved his hand to his face, gingerly sweeping his bangs that hid his nebulous eyes. He swore that his heart ripped itself out of his chest, and he didn’t allow himself to be concerned with the thought of other skater’s watching them, completely lost in the moment. Neither boy moved a muscle, their faces only inches apart, and their eyes never left each others. Cyrus shifted himself nervously at the prolonged eye contact, convinced that TJ could read his soul and its contents, like his hopeless, heart-wrenching, completely head over heels crush on the jock. Before either of them dared to move again, the brunette felt pain shoot through the bottom of his leg. “Ow!” he winced, pulling away from the blonde and sitting himself upright. For a beat, TJ remained completely paralyzed, a dazed expression overtaking his face and his lips slightly parted. Then instantly he was sitting up too, looking down at the smaller boy, dizzy with anxiety. “Cyrus, what’s wrong?” TJ clutched at the other boy’s shoulder, searching for the root of Cyrus’ pain, “Where does it hurt?” “M-My ankle,” Cyrus looked up at his with teary eyes, his bottom lip quivering, “I think I sprained it.”“Can I see?” TJ asked gently, his throat closing up at the sight of Cyrus’ silent tears. The smaller boy only nodded and flinched when TJ carefully removed his skates. His left ankle was slightly bigger than his left, but there was no discoloration or serious swelling, which meant the injury was mild.“I don’t think it’s sprained. Just twisted, maybe” TJ wiped a stray tear that was sliding down Cyrus’ face, “Do you think you can walk?” The throbbing pain in Cyrus’ ankle told him no. “I don’t think so,” Cyrus said glumly but for some reason, he busted out laughing, “I’m a disgrace! Just leave me here to die!” TJ broke into laughter as well, his eyes wide but still perplexed, “Jeez, don’t be so dramatic, Underdog.”“I can’t help myself,” Cyrus sighed, raising a hand to his forehead to feign agony, “Dramatic is basically written in my genetic code.” TJ rolled his eyes fondly, taking off his own skates and placing both pairs inside of his bag. “Cyrus always with the jokes,” TJ sat on his knees, “Okay, Mr. Dramatic, climb on.” “What?” “Get on my back,” TJ commanded, “You can’t walk on that ankle.” “You’re going to give me a piggyback ride?” Cyrus asked in disbelief. “Not willingly,” he quipped, a smirk on his pout, “But I can’t leave you here to die.”“I can try to walk!” Cyrus protested. “Don’t be difficult, Underdog,” TJ shuffled closer to him, “Now get on before your ankle gets worse; we need to get you an ice pack asap.”“Okay,” Cyrus huffed in defeat. Careful to avoid disturbing his ankle, he hoisted himself onto TJ’s back, who wrapped his arms around the back of his legs, shifting him up to get a solid grip. Cyrus hesitantly snaked his arms around the blonde, his ear and the side of his face pressed again TJ’s temple. “Damn, Cy, you weigh a ton!” TJ bounced Cyrus up once they began walking, tightening his grip once he felt the brunette sliding. Cyrus squeaked, his heart beating harshly against his ribcage. He prayed that TJ couldn’t feel the thumping of his chest against his back. “I do not, you jerk!” Cyrus grumbled, wrapping his arms around TJ tighter, his hands connected over the boy’s collarbones.“I know. I just like messing with you,”Cyrus could hear the smirk in his voice, “We should head to my place; it’s closer. And I think your step-mom would kill me if I brought you back like this.”“Yeah. Good point,” The brown-haired boy giggled a bit, his laugh going directly into TJ’s ear as they walked up the stairs. As they got closer to the bike, it finally occurred to Cyrus that after several months of friendship, he had never been to TJ’s house.But today, he would for the first time.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
TJ Kippen was one huge, intriguing mystery that Cyrus found himself unable to crack in their few months of a friendship, but nonetheless, he enjoyed the surprises that came in the package that was the gorgeous athlete of a friend. With TJ, life truly was a box of chocolates, and Cyrus had a mean sweet tooth. Like today, he never would’ve imagined himself nearly on the brink of collapse, hanging on to the upper body of the blonde, making their way to TJ’s house. Well, of course, that was a little dramatic, but Cyrus couldn’t help himself. “Teej, are we almost there?” Cyrus whined, the pain in his ankle still present. “You act like you’re the one doing all the work,” TJ huffed, a bead of sweat running down his temple as he pedaled up the incline of the street. “My ankle is throbbing,” Cyrus reasoned, pouting discontentedly. “Next time don’t be such a show off,” TJ teased, “We’re almost there, Underdog. Don’t worry.” Cyrus pressed himself closer to the back of the jock in response, the soft fleece of TJ’s hoodie being the ideal place for the brown-haired boy to find comfort in his pain.
The jock pedaled faster after the reached the top of the incline, rounding their path to make a turn into his neighborhood. The exhaustion of the slopey path they took to his house was not enough to distract TJ from the reality of the situation. Cyrus Goodman, his doe-eyed best friend and his kryptonite was going to be in his house in a few moments. The thought was both exciting and terrifying. No, TJ wasn’t embarrassed of where he lived. He wasn’t embarrassed of his family; he loved them. He was just nervous. He was nervous for Cyrus to see the TJ he wasn’t at school. The TJ who wasn’t the star captain of the basketball team. The TJ that only a hand-full of people only ever saw; the TJ he felt only a hand-full of people could actually love. He desperately wanted to add Cyrus to that hand-full. Once the two slowed near the direction of TJ’s house, the athlete started to feel self-conscious. His house wasn’t small or rundown, nor was it grandiose or massive, like majority of the homes on his street. It was a light blue home, looking somewhat like a cottage. It was shy in a sense, but it looked warm, lived-in, with an impressively chaotic array of vines and a mess of bushes and yellow roses growing under its windows. TJ instantly noticed that his father’s battered teal pickup truck was parked in its usual place under their lemon tree. They rode up directly towards the front door of the athlete’s home, allowing him to catch his breath. “Nice place,” Cyrus mused once they stopped, taking a moment to look around. “Eh, thanks,” TJ hopped off the bike to help Cyrus up, balancing the brunette’s weight on one-side and leaning him against a wall. “Wait, here,” the jock said before rolling his set of wheels to its place in the garage. “Okay, not trying to alarm you, but the whole fam is home.” “They don’t bite, do they?” Cyrus said half-jokingly. He didn’t expect to spend his Sunday afternoon meeting his crush’s parents. “Only if you deserve it” TJ smirked, “But they’re gonna love you; you’re practically a saint compared to other people I’ve brought around before.” The blonde helped his injured best friend up the steps towards his front door. “Oh, like who?”“Some of the basketball guys.” TJ answered, his voice a bit begrudging. Cyrus stayed silent as TJ unlocked his front door; something telling him not to push the subject further. “I’m home!” TJ called out as they entered his living room, which oddly reminded Cyrus of a set of the Carrie Diaries. He couldn’t help but notice how weirdly natural a checkered rug and obnoxiously vibrant colored furniture looked together. It was a stark difference from the earth tones and simple pieces in the brunette’s own home.“Hey Teddy! Home already-- Cyrus?” a high-pitched voice called out from her seat on a rust-colored sofa. “Amber?” Cyrus furrowed his eyebrows until an expression of realization overtook his face. “You guys know each other?” TJ questioned plopping Cyrus down on the lazy boy opposite of his sister and carefully elevating his leg with a pillow.“Uh yeah, we’re friends,” Cyrus explained, deciding to leave out the part of him being her off-brand therapist, “I knew your sister’s name’s Amber, but I didn’t think it was that Amber.”“Yeah, sadly I was saddled with Teddy at birth,” Amber quipped. “Teddy?”Amber sea green eyes glinted with mischief, her furrowed dark eyebrows resembling that of a comic book villain. TJ feebly shot her a warning look but knew he was done for. “Theodore James Kippen!” Amber shrieked, “You never told Cyrus your full name?” TJ huffed, rolling his eyes deeply. “Theodore James?” Cyrus bit his lips, trying to keep a giggle in. “Yeah.” TJ knew he was probably beet-red, “It’s awful, I know.”“No, no. It’s just not what I was expecting” Cyrus assured him, “I just assumed your name was Tiny Jaybird or something.”TJ scoffed, but his eyes sparkled affectionately, “Wow, Cy. That’s seriously your worse guess to date-- Oh, shoot I nearly forgot! Lemme go run and get you an ice pack!” Amber turned to the brunette once her brother jogged off into their kitchen, looking remarkably a lot like Nagini, “So, by the look of that ankle, I guess my old skates didn’t hold up huh?”“Uh, you knew Teej took them?” Cyrus asked cautiously. Even though they were far closer than acquaintances at this point, something about the blonde girl made Cyrus nervous. Maybe it was the eyebrows.“Well, duh,” Amber snorted, “Teddy’s not as slick as he thinks he is. Besides, I didn’t bite his head off like I normally would cuz I knew it was for you.”“He talks to you about our, um, ‘tasks’?”“Yes, that boy never shuts up about it. I know you’re important to him but sheesh, seriously,” Amber smirked, her dark eyebrows slightly scrunched. “Oh? Important how-”“Here you go, Underdog!” the blonde returned and handed the injured boy a bottle of water, an ice pack and some painkillers. “You're a lifesaver, Teej” Cyrus smiled up at him gratefully, positioning the ice pack on top of his ankle, “Or should I say Theodore.”“Ugh please don’t-”“Where are my children?” a warm gravelly voice called out from the foot of the stairs. Cyrus turned around in his seat to see a tall, blonde, older man dressed in sweatpants and a tattered Nightmare on Elm Street t-shirt. Despite being very handsome, he had a shaggy tiredness to him that reminded Cyrus of Trusty from Lady and the Tramp. His sharp eyes were a brilliant sea green, and he greeted the siblings with a half smile, and Cyrus could only guess who he was. “Hey Dad.” TJ walked up to hug his father, engulfing him in a close yet caution embrace. “Who’s your guest?” TJ’s father half smile morphed into a grin as he walked into the living room. “This is my friend, Cyrus.” Cyrus, who’s ankle was feeling significantly better, stood up hastily to extend his right hand, “Hello, Mr. Kippen.”“Please, kid. Call me Rusty. Mr. Kippen is my pop’s name” Cyrus smiled shyly and nodded his head as they exchanged a handshake. “Did I just hear the name Cyrus?” the owner of the sweet, silvery voice entered the room. TJ’s mother appeared to be around the same age as Rusty, maybe a few years younger. Her soft face, much like Amber’s with a daintily rounded nose, was framed by wispy brown hair and dark eyebrows. Although she mostly resembled the older sister, she had a familiar pair of sage green eyes that crinkled up in a way that her son’s did. He looked at all four of them, Rusty and Amber chatting amongst themselves on the couch now. Surrounded by one of the most painfully gorgeous families he’d ever seen, Cyrus suddenly felt very out of place and homely. “That’s me!” Cyrus replied nervously walking over to the petite woman, “I’m Cyrus, Mrs. Kippen.”“I finally get to meet the infamous Cyrus. I’ve heard a lot about you, hon,” she smiled a smile fit for a magazine cover, and Cyrus wanted to dissipate under her gaze. Her stare had a quality to it that made Cyrus feel grounded, seen, like he really existed in that moment, and even though he liked boys, he could understand falling in love with her, “I’m Alice to all friends of TJ, especially to you.” “Alice” repeated Cyrus. I’m infamous, Cyrus questioned mentally; for what he didn’t know. The brunette snuck a glance at the son of the house, who looked flustered as he watched the other boy and his mother converse. “I was just about to get started on an early dinner, or linner as we call it,“ Alice chuckled to herself, “Will Cyrus be joining us?” TJ seemed to snap back to life, and he sunk into his trademark smirk, “Sure, if you’re cool with it, Underdog.” Cyrus nodded his head, perhaps too adamantly; he’d be crazy to say no to spending more time with TJ and his family, “I’d love to! Lemme text my step-mom to ask if it’s okay.” He promptly took out his phone to ask Leslie for permission, who replied quickly with ‘yes but don’t come home too late.’“She said yes!” Alice nodded with a smile before making her way towards the kitchen, “I hope you like Italian, Cyrus.” The brunette beamed after her and heard Rusty’s voice grow in excitement as he followed her into the other room “Please tell me you’re using Ma’s ravioli recipe, Aly Cat.” He heard their muffled giggling from where he stood in the living room, and Cyrus’ heart fluttered with warmth. “So is your ankle feeling any better?” TJ was standing beside him, his hands concealed in the pockets of his jeans. “Think so. Me walking is a good sign,” the brown-haired boy shrugged, “The miracles an ice pack and Tylenol can pull off.”“Great, Leslie’s not gonna kill me then,” TJ quipped. Cyrus chuckled, “You live to see another day, Teej.” TJ rolled his eyes fondly but a genuine smile enveloped his face, “Care for a tour, then?”“Only if you do the tour-guide voice.”. “Your wish is my command.” TJ smirked, nudging the smaller boy with his shoulder. Cyrus returned the action, a coy smirk of his own forming on his lips, “So I’m infamous, huh?” “I did say I talk about you, didn’t I?” TJ responded, his eyes shiny affectionately. Before Cyrus had a chance to dissolve into a human puddle, TJ was pulling him up the stairs by his wrist. They speed down a small hallway, Cyrus frantically trying to take a look at all the family photos hung on the wall. They walked by a few closed doors, one was a painted bubblegum pink. “Amber’s room?” Cyrus mused with a grin. The blonde nodded with a chuckle as he opened a door on the right side of the hallway and walked in, sunlight instantly illuminating his backside. Cyrus took a moment to stand by the door frame, savoring in the sight. The jock’s bedroom was nothing and everything like how Cyrus imagined it to be. There were scattered pieces of clothes on the floor of the room, which were mostly hoodies, but it gave the place a more lived-in look rather than messy. How typical, the small boy thought. The walls were lined with shots of sweaty athletes that Cyrus didn’t recognize in the slightest, along with posters of different bands, a lot of which looked like they were around longer than he was alive. TJ’s shelves were lined with an array of trophies, as well as an impressive collection of novels and vinyl records that Cyrus itched to sort through. “You must be the Red Rooster’s best customer,” Cyrus jested, still examining random aspects of the blonde’s space. “Yeah, Andi’s dad knows me by name now. It’s gotten pretty bad,” TJ’s voice was light with laughter, but he self-consciously watched the brunette pick apart his room from his desk chair. Cyrus was too distracted by the glow-in-the-dark stars that were stuck to the boy’s ceiling to notice. He wondered what it would be like to stare up at them at night, which meant he’d sleep next to-- Okay, he wasn’t going to go there right now. He shook his head and turned his attention to look at the wall that stood behind the head of the bed. There were multiple framed awards hung up, some for basketball but one for an essay contest and one for piano performance, which instantly peaked the brunette’s interest. “You play piano?” Cyrus turned back to his friend, his jaw slack with wonder. “Uh, yeah.” TJ rubbed at the back of his neck with an impish smile, “I have for a few years.” “That’s so cool, Teej. You never told me.” Cyrus teased, albeit a little bitterly. It was completely unfair of the universe to make the boy gorgeous, smart, physically gifted, and musically inclined on top of that. “Well, you never asked.” TJ teased back, sitting up from his spot on the bed. Cyrus took the spot next to him and leaned closely towards him, practically buzzing with excitement. “Will you play for me?” pleaded the brunette, his root-beer colored eyes enormous under his batted eyelashes. TJ swallowed.“Ugh, I’m seriously out of practice, Cy. It’s, uh, been a while.” TJ’s last words took a somber edge to them. Cyrus’ eyebrows knitted together in concern, and he mentally decided whether or not to push the subject. Before he had a chance, TJ threw his head back to the ceiling and sighed dramatically, “Fine, but one song only. Okay?” Cyrus agreed eagerly, hopping to his feet and him being the one to drag TJ out of the room this time. The family piano sat in plain sight in one of the corners of the living room, and Cyrus wondered how he hadn’t notice it beforehand. The blonde walked ahead of him, scooting the piano bench out and sitting down on it. He motioned for Cyrus to sit beside him, the sides of their bodies pressed together once he did; the bench was barely big enough for two so it was a tight fit. The brunette fidgeted with his hands as the blonde ran his own fingers down the ivory keys, the piano’s cool surface feeling simultaneously foreign and innate. Cyrus gazed up at his friend, and despite being so physically close to him, the other boy suddenly seemed so far away. In that moment, TJ looked both exhausted and relieved, like a traveler who had finally come home after aimlessly wandering the Earth. “Teddy?” Amber whispered out, her voice breathless as she walked into the room, “You’re going to play?” She rested herself against the back of their sofa, keeping a few feet distance from the boys at the piano.TJ didn’t answer her; it almost seemed like he didn’t actually hear her come in, let alone speak. He remained silent for a few seconds, his hands stiffly hovering over the keys, and Cyrus felt himself holding his breath for whatever reason, he wasn’t sure. And then, a few sweet, high pitches floated through the air, and Cyrus exhaled. TJ seemed to relax the longer he played, but his face remained contorted in concentration. He started off with some simpler chords, eventually added a few embellishments and arpeggios that elegantly wove in and out of each other. I’m super rusty, he thought to himself, and he couldn’t think of the name of the song he was playing, but somehow his fingers remembered all of the notes, after all this time. “Theodore, honey.” Alice was standing behind the three teens, her pretty face paled with shock, and the boys jumped a bit, totally unaware that she had even entered the room, “Do you still remember Fleetwood?” “Yeah, Mom.” TJ looked back at his mother with a smile that Cyrus could only describe as melancholy, “I still have the book somewhere.” Alice returned a similar smile, and the moment of silence sent chills up Cyrus’ spine. Without saying anything further, the blonde got up and rummaged through a pile of long paperback books. He sighed once he came to a particular white book, the front decorated with a photograph of a white grand piano covered in a watermark of a lotus flower that was entitled “Songs of Springtime”. “Mind if I sit, Cyrus?” Alice was standing at the brunette’s side now, her green eyes glossy. Cyrus swallowed thickly and stood up to let her sit down next to TJ, who was staring at the unopened book. The brunette almost felt guilty, like he had set off an unintentional bomb by pushing his friend to play. His fear ran amuck for a moment, until he felt a comforting hand slide in his, and he looked up as Amber squeezed his hand in an action of solace, her face warm and her eyebrows soft. The boy relaxed and turned his attention back to the piano once the starting chords were played. TJ played the introduction of a song, messing up a few times here and there. Cyrus stole a glance of the sheet music he read from, only seeing the title of the piece. The brown-haired boy was enchanted by the unfamiliar tune; it was both warm and haunting, and it made Cyrus feel nostalgic for a song he’d never heard before. With the notes still twinkling in the background, his mind wandered to how angelic TJ looked as he played, his ungelled hair falling over his forehead and slightly masking his eyes. The boy’s beauty had been such a strong distraction that Cyrus gasped in surprise when the blonde began to sing. “For you, there'll be no more cryingFor you, the sun will be shiningAnd I feel that when I'm with youIt's alright, I know it's right” TJ’s voice was slightly raspy but somehow soft and honey-like at the same time. He wasn’t always perfectly in key, but to Cyrus, it was the most perfect sound that his ears had ever heard. Then, another voice resonated into the room as Alice took over in the next verse, playing alongside her son. “To you, I'll give the worldTo you, I'll never be cold'Cause I feel that when I'm with youIt's alright, I know it's right” Their voices came together in harmony at the chorus, and Cyrus’ heart swelled in his chest. He noticed Rusty standing in the door frame of the kitchen, his eyes glazed over and a hand held up to his collarbone. “And the songbirds are singingLike they know the scoreAnd I love you, I love you, I love youLike never before” The song finished far before Cyrus was ready for it to, and he blinked in silence for a beat until he and Amber erupted into roar of applause. TJ turned back and gave them an Earth shattering smile, and Cyrus’ knees were ready to give out. Alice smiled back at them too, a few stray tears falling down her cheeks. She stood up, and Rusty instantly pulled her into a tight hug. She peered out at the brunette through her tears, and Cyrus felt that sense of belonging he did under the woman’s gaze.“Thank you, Cyrus” she hiccupped, “I don’t know how you got my son to play.” She looked up her husband now, “He must be a wizard or something. I never thought I’d hear that piano sing again.” She was giggling now, wiping at her cheeks. TJ’s parents smiled warmly at him and all he could do was nod. He allowed himself to steal at a glance at the blonde still at the piano, but to Cyrus’s surprised, TJ was already looking at him, his cheeks pink and his eyes glittering, and Cyrus heard the piano melody swirling distantly in his ears. “Right then!” Alice clapped her hands suddenly, her tears now sparkling with joy rather than tears, “Who’s ready for ravioli?” “Me! Me!” Rusty called out, like a child in elementary school, “That stuff’s to die for.” -*- Cyrus left TJ’s home reluctantly a few hours later, his entire body warm and his stomach contentedly stuffed with Alice’s ravioli that was, in fact, to die for. Dinner had been just as perfect as the moment at the piano had been, the boys often shooting smiles at each other from across between mouthfuls of pasta. Cyrus had felt like something had shifted since TJ had played; their gazes felt a lot more… loaded, Cyrus decided, but he chose not to decipher what exactly had changed. Instead, He couldn’t get over how attached he already was to the Kippen home and how quickly he felt a sense of a second family with the lot, especially Alice. The best part of the night was when they broke out into a feud over a game of monopoly and bet on the winner with Hershey kisses. TJ and Cyrus created an ally-ship against the blonde’s parents, Amber playing mediator because she didn’t want to get caught up in the “ugliness”. The boys' knees touched as the game progressed, and when Cyrus had won, with the blonde’s help of course, everyone cheered, and the two boys shared one of those handclasp hugs that the smaller boy had yet to master, and Cyrus felt like he had swallowed the sun. TJ insisted that he walked Cyrus home so that’s what he was doing now, dusk painting the sky with a muted blue color as their hands brushed each other’s with every step. Both boys had a sweet smile on their faces, and the silence between them was peaceful, apart from the sounds of crickets humming into the night. “Your family’s really awesome, you know.” Cyrus said after a few more minutes of walking. TJ grinned, his eyes full of affection they way they had been all night long, “Yeah, I know… They love you already, Underdog. I’ve seriously never seen my mom cry in front of anyone who wasn’t family.” “Oh my gosh, really?” Cyrus breathed, his eyes wide, “I really didn’t mean to make her cry or anything I just really wanted to hear you play and-” “They were happy tears, Cyrus. Don’t worry,” TJ reassured him through a chuckle, wrapping his arm around the smaller boy. Cyrus nodded and sighed into a smile. They walked in silence for a few minutes more. “Can I ask you something, Teej?” Cyrus asked hesitantly. “Of course, Underdog” TJ pulled the boy in closer to his side as they continued walking down the block, a few streets away from the Goodman home. “Why did you stop playing in the first place? Your playing was honestly so amazing.” Cyrus rambled on, earning a brief smirk from TJ until his face fell into something more serious. He didn’t respond at first, and Cyrus searched his contemplative face for an answer. Perhaps he had crossed some unspoken boundary with that question, and Cyrus’ heart dropped into his digesting ravioli, “I’m sorry if that was too personal. You really don’t have to answer that-”“No, it’s fine, Cy… I want to tell you,” TJ smiled lukewarmly, looking away from the boy and into the twilight sky, “... I stopped doing a lot of things when my dad got sick. I kinda just didn’t have interest in them anymore. They all started to feel meaningless, I guess. It was little things, like karaoke with Amber on Fridays night or baking bread with my mom on Sunday mornings. There were a lot little things I just, I don’t know, forgot how to love. But it wasn’t like that with piano…. It just” TJ’s voice began to sound coarse and thick, and without looking at him, Cyrus changed their position to join his hand with TJ’s without a second thought, “Playing was too painful... My dad was the one who bought it for us, I guess for me because I was taking lessons at the time. When he got really bad, it just got harder and harder…” His voice drifted off, and Cyrus nodded, understanding completely. “The only thing that really stuck was basketball; it felt like it was the only thing I was truly good at so I clung onto it.” TJ’s stiffened as he continued, “If I’m being honest, I think that’s why I was such a jerk to Buffy. I was scared of how good she was. Basketball felt like my thing, and I guess I was scare she’d take it away for me somehow.” “I understand.” Cyrus felt tears pricking his eyes and threatening to spill over, wanting desperately to console his friend, “But that’s the thing about teams, you get to share the things you love with others. With Buffy.” “Yeah, well, it took me a while to see it that way. I didn’t want to be on anyone’s team; I liked when things were just mine, you know?” “And now?”“Well, now, things are different.” the blonde finally made eye contact with the brunette, and Cyrus’ breath hitched in his throat. TJ looked completely undone, his sandy blonde hair messy, his eyes brimming with glistening tears and his face crimson from the vulnerability of his speech. The devilish part of Cyrus, that rarely made its way into his brain, wanted to push TJ against a tree and kiss him senseless until the pain went away. He decided against that though so he settled on a gentle squeeze of the boy’s hand. “I’m really sorry about your dad, TJ” Cyrus cooed. It was common knowledge between his friend group that TJ’s father was diagnosed with cancer the year before they had all met, but he didn’t know the details. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to know; he often found himself longing to know everything about TJ, but the jock rarely ever brought up his family. Cyrus assumed there was a reason for that, but now he hoped that this moment would be the start of him opening up more regularly. “It’s okay. He’s been in remission for a while now. Things are a lot better,” TJ smiled at him for the first time since he delved into the subject, which Cyrus gently returned, “I thought about getting back into piano after my dad got better, but I never did. I mean I really missed it, but I guess I just need a little push. So thank you.” “Why are you thanking me? I didn’t do anything.” Cyrus eyebrows furrowed but his lips were tinted with happiness. “You did everything, Cy.” TJ mused, his grin bright in the dimness of the streetlight, “I wouldn’t have been brave enough to start if you hadn’t encourage me to." Cyrus couldn’t help the goofy smile that overtook his face, and he shrugged his shoulders coyly, “Happy to be of service.” The jock bumped their shoulders together, biting his lip.“So does that mean I make you brave, too?” Cyrus questioned, his expression bashful. TJ shrugged his shoulders in the same fashion that Cyrus had, but the sincerity of his grin gave away the real answer. Cyrus rolled his eyes fondly, him being the one to nudge the blonde with his shoulder this time.“By the way, extend the invite to Amber for the Lagoon next weekend for me, okay?”TJ nodded, smirked down at him, “Anything for you, Underdog.” This comment warranted another eye roll from the brunette, who ignored the way his stomach flipped inside out. They were still holding hands, sending each other the loaded smiles they had normalized that night, even though they were stopped in front of their destination. Cyrus didn’t know how long they stood there staring at each other, or when they even stopped walking, but the devilish urge was poking its way back into his thoughts. “I guess I should go in now, huh?” Cyrus uttered the words absentmindedly, still staring into his favorite pair of green eyes, and he made no effort to let go of his best friend’s hand. “Yeah,” TJ murmured, his voice sounding faraway in Cyrus’ ears. Cyrus swore he sensed TJ moving closer to him, and the piano melody began playing again just behind his chocolate eyes. Before either of them had a chance to move another inch, the front door of the Goodman’s home whipped open, revealing the gobsmacked expressions of Buffy and Andi. Andi’s mouth gaped open like a fish out of water, but the curly-haired girl beside her collected herself quickly and spoke, “Cyrus?”Cyrus’ face was an inhuman shade of red as he squeaked out a “Hi.”Buffy squinted at them, “Is that TJ? Are you guys holding hands?!” Cyrus jumped out of his skin, frantically letting go of TJ’s hand, who chuckled amusedly. “I’ll see you guys, later. My parents are probably worried about me by now.” TJ smirked at their still stunned faces, “Bye, Underdog.” He smiled warmly at the other boy before turning around and strolling briskly in the opposite direction. Cyrus stared after him for a moment, a smile dreamily on his lips, but when he heard Buffy clear her throat, he timidly turned his head to meet her crossed arms. “You’ve got some explaining to do, Cyrus Goodman.”“...Um.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Cyrus let out a deep, throaty yawn, slumping over an elbow rested on his school desk. He jittered in his seat, waiting for English period to begin, getting to school far earlier than most sane people do. His brain didn’t allow him a proper night of rest following the conversation, which was closer to a full blown interrogation, he had with Buffy and Andi. Needless to say, he was exhausted.
Despite his heavy eyelids, he found himself mindlessly filling out the list he kept hidden away beneath pages and pages of science notes, the list of unattainable things Cyrus wanted to do with TJ growing steadily in number. The list started as a way to pass time when he got bored, but as he filled it with sappy endeavors like “stargazing”, “build a pillow fort”, and even willing him to write “morning kisses”; he knew he was too far gone. In actuality, the list harbored Cyrus’ deepest and most unfiltered desires that he could only imagine living out with TJ, as completely frivolous and silly as it was. At least he wasn’t drawing out “Cyrus + TJ 4ever” with hearts all over the lined pages like he had with Jonah; he wasn’t twelve years old anymore, after all. No, The Bucket List: 2.0 was more sophisticated, he rationalized. Even so, he would be completely mortified if anyone other than him ever read the list, especially the exact boy it was about. He often said moments of humiliation made him want to double over and die, but TJ getting hold of his list would actually kill him. Which is why he practically fell over in his chair when he felt a hand clamp itself on his shoulder.He shrieked in surprise, bracing himself for a fall that never came. “Oh my god, Underdog. You okay?” TJ was hovering over him, his hand steadying the brunette’s seat. “Oh, yeah, totally not experiencing heart palpitations!” Cyrus exclaimed.“Sorry, Cy.” TJ’s goofy grin chipping at the sincerity of his apology, “You’re more jumpy than usual; if that’s even possible. Whatcha got there anyway-”“Oh, nothing,” Cyrus slammed his notebook closed shut, swallowing the squeak in his throat, “Just my stupid science notes.”“Oh, alright?” TJ quirked an eyebrow, his eyes burning with curiosity, but he didn’t push the subject and rather slid into the seat behind the brunette. Cyrus had never been more grateful for his best friend’s self control as he scolded himself for being so careless with the list. The thought of TJ seeing even a word of it made his stomach flip anxiously. “So how hard did Buffy press you yesterday?” Cyrus sighed deeply, turning around in his chair. “She was really mad that I forgot about our study session last night. I’m really surprised she didn’t call the police department.”“That bad, huh?” TJ grimaced, though his eyes gleamed with satisfaction. “You have no idea,” Cyrus looked up towards the ceiling and back down, “You know, you look awfully unempathetic.” “I can’t help it; Underdog,” TJ smirked, his gaze never leaving Cyrus as more and more students filed in and sat down, “I live to push her buttons.” “So that’s the only reason you held my hand then, huh?” Cyrus quipped, squinting his eyes. “Excuse you! If I recall last night correctly, you held my hand,” TJ stretched his leg to tap the heel of his best friend’s foot with his sneaker. The brunette giggled, stepping on the white top of TJ’s converse, “In your dreams, Mr. Basketball.” TJ wrapped his foot around Cyrus’, tickling his ankle in the process and opened his mouth to respond “Ma-”“Mornin’ class! Sorry I’m late,” Mrs. Danfield bustled through the door, interrupting TJ mid word, “How was your weekend?” Cyrus pouted at the blonde as lackluster replies were heard from his classmates; he really wanted to know what TJ was going to say before he was cut off. TJ nudged his foot one more time with a smug smile, and the brunette turned around with as blush as Mrs. Danfield began her grueling lecture on appositives and conjunctive sentences. -*-The next school week was chaotic, to say the least. A couple of days had dragged by without the company of Cyrus’ friends. Everyone was slammed by their schedules; the boy occasionally stole moments of conversation with Buffy and Andi in between classes and after school before the vicious cycle of state testing and studying held him by his ears. He didn’t see much of TJ either, missing him in the hallways in favor of his face glued to the inside of his notebooks or rushing to class in hopes of taking a five minute power nap before his next period started. So now that he was headed to spend his lunch break with the girls and Jonah for the first time that week, he had a bit of an unusual skip in his step.“Hey guys!” He chirped at Buffy, Andi, Jonah, all slumped rather forlornly over their sad macaroni school lunches. The three groaned. “Please, Cyrus!” Buffy hissed, slumping further onto her elbow, “What did we say about indoor voices?” “Sorry,” Cyrus winced and slide into the spot in front of her and besides Jonah, noticing how exhausted they all looked. Even his frisbee-slinging friend, a literal ray of human-sunshine, was dim in the face and staring blankly into his mixed vegetables.“Why are you so happy, anyway? Your enthusiasm is… exhausting” Andi’s words strung out slowly as she struggled to keep her eyes open. On top of exams, Cyrus knew Andi was having problems at home; he felt a strong pang of pity for his pixie-haired best friend. “Can a guy not be happy to see his best friends?!” Cyrus dug into his lunch pail, only to realize that his daily PB&J had been replaced with a tuna salad sandwich. He frowned at his lunch. “Why such a long face? You joining the dark side?” Buffy smirked weakly, Andi and Jonah chuckling weakly under their breaths. “Dad packed me tuna.” He scrunched his nose, “Hey, well, at least I’m not starving.” He returned to his merry self as munched on baby carrots and potato chips instead. "That's the spirit," Buffy rolled her eyes and poked at her macaroni with a scowl, “Hey, where’s Basketball Boy anyway? Surprised he hasn’t shown up yet.”“You act like he follows me around or something.” Cyrus rolled his eyes, gnawing on another carrot. Andi’s eyes lit up mischievously, ignoring Cyrus and turning to the curly-haired athlete, “Honestly. It’s like he has some built in Cyrus detector.” “He does not!” Cyrus groaned indignantly causing the girls to giggle maniacally, even earning a chuckle from Jonah. Cyrus turns to the boy, a look of betrayal sewn on his face. Jonah threw his hands up in surrender, wearing an innocent grin, “Well, they aren’t wrong, Cy-guy.”“I actually haven’t seen him much this week,” Cyrus explains, pointedly ignoring their comments, “except for first period, but you know, we’ve been testing so not really the best situation for talking.” “Or for holding hands!” Andi teased, nibbling on a cracker. “You guys held hands?” Jonah spoke casually as he tore his gaze from his phone screen, though his eyes were wide with shock and shining with interest. Cyrus came out to him the weekend beforehand, nervously mentioning it over a ping-pong session. Despite Cyrus’ fear for the worst, Jonah barely batted an eye at the confession, showing his support and acceptance in the most Jonah-esque fashion possible: with a casual “Okay, cool”. In his eyes, it had been no big deal because it really was no big deal. Sure, Cyrus was dorky and a bit eccentric, but he was no different, after all. Cyrus swallowed down a squeak. “It was for comforting purposes only! He was upset, and I wanted to be there for him, you know, in, like, uh, a friendly way.” “It didn’t look so friendly from your porch.” Buffy said between bites, causing Andi to snort into her chocolate milk. Cyrus groaned loudly; he hated when the two made comments like that; the like becoming more frequent since they caught him and TJ holding hands outside of his dad’s house. Buffy swore up and down that it meant something, but Cyrus shut the girls down, denying anything they had to say about his relationship with TJ or his own feelings for the boy completely, like the red-handed liar that he was. He needed to do it for his own sanity. After all, Buffy and TJ were still in a weird frenemy limbo, and the moment Cyrus admitted his crush out loud, he knew it was over for him. It just couldn’t be real. “Ugh, you guys are the worst!” Cyrus exclaimed, raising his baby carrot over his head dramatically, “Why do you love to torture me so?” “We need something to get us through testing week!” Andi jested with a smirk. Cyrus rolled his eyes playfully before dropping his head to the cafeteria table with a soft thud. The sound of familiar laughter urged him to lift his head with a pouty frown. “What’s up, Underdog?” TJ asked amusedly, sitting beside him and draping his arm over the boy’s shoulder like it was the most natural thing in the world, “Based on that face you’re pulling, you tried the macaroni.” “Ew! No! I got tuna,” Cyrus gestured to his untouched sandwich with a playful frown, “Anyway, I’m just getting bullied here by my so-called friends!” “Hey, what are friends for if not to keep you humbled?” Buffy quipped before taking a swig of her Gatorade, pointedly eyeing TJ’s arm, “Took you long enough to get here, Kippen.” “Yeah, well I was held up,” TJ shrugged with a slight smirk. “Did you run out of time for your Chem exam?” Cyrus looked up at his best friend with soft concern. “Nah, I actually had time to spare, surprisingly,” TJ smiled softly at his worried expression before lifting up the arm held discreetly to the side opposite of the brunette. “I went and got you this.” He set down a large chocolate-chocolate chip muffin on the table, wrapped in a bundle of napkins. A large crinkly eyed grin bloomed across Cyrus' face, and he tried to cover up how embarrassingly soft he felt in that moment. "Oh, Teej! You're my hero!" He exclaimed dramatically, his voice dripping in sarcasm, both hands held to his heart.TJ rolled his eyes but felt warmth rising to his cheeks. "I know." He smirked playfully at the boy, earning a shoulder punch from the brunette. They grinned warmly at each other, missing the exchange of knowing smiles shared between the girls across from them. “Why does Cyrus only get a muffin?” Buffy teased."Because Cyrus has special muffin privileges" he shrugged, his grin faltering as he glanced over her head at the clock on the wall. "Shit, I gotta go! Promised Coleman I’d meet up with him before class.” “Want the tuna for the road?” Cyrus scooted the saran wrap sandwich to his other athletic friend. “Cool. Thanks!” TJ grabbed it, squeezing the brown-haired boy’s shoulder graciously, “Oh before I forget, you able to hang after school?” Cyrus smiled shyly, shrugging with a head tilt, “Yeah, sure. What did you have in mind?” “I got another task planned to cross off the list.”“Oh, cool. Cool.” Cyrus struggled to sound nonchalant, a giddy feeling building in his chest, “Meet up by the bikes?” “Hey, but I thought we were all gonna study after school, Cy!” Andi protested. Cyrus shot her a pleading look, “Raincheck?”Andi relented with an exasperated sigh and a smile, “Fine. But all this de-fearing better guarantee Cyrus riding all of the rides with us this weekend.” “We’re getting there.” TJ shot her a cheeky smile, standing up before giving Cyrus shoulder another affectionate squeeze, “See you at the bikes?” “See you. Good luck with Coleman.” Cyrus gazed fondly at the blonde. “Thanks. Catch you guys later.” the fleeting friend grinned brightly at the girls and Jonah before meeting Cyrus’ eyes again. “You’re still coming to the Lagoon with us Saturday, right?” Jonah spoke up, a blinding smile on his lips. “Yeah, totally. Wouldn’t miss it!” TJ said, his smile softening as his eyes lingered on the boy nibbling on the muffin beside him, a few stray crumbs on his upper chin. God, he was so cute.“Bye, Underdog.” He violently fought his hand’s urge to reach out and rub the chocolate that speckled the skin right under his lips off. “Bye, Teej.” Cyrus rubbed at his chin self-consciously; he was known to be a messy eater. TJ beamed, forcefully tearing his eyes away from the boy’s face and waving the tuna sandwich in the air in a goodbye before turning around and walking out the lunchroom doors. Cyrus watched him as he went, mindlessly chewing the muffin and feeling his heart skip a beat every time he was reminded that TJ had gotten the muffin for him. Just for him. He was so gone. He turned his attention back to the others, his mind still reeling, until his attention focused solely on the girls; Andi, who looked like she was bursting at the seams with joy, and Buffy, who was grinning so deviously he swore he could see small horns sprouting out of her generous curls. “He brought you a muffin.” They both exclaimed simultaneously, Andi following with a giddy squeal. “Now, how would you explain that in a friendly way, Cy?” Buffy mocked despite a pleased smile on her face. She loved when she was right. “Not to mention, You’re my hero, TJ!” Andi mocked in a high pitched voice, her hands held over her heart. "Hey, I was joking!""Were you, though… were you really?" Buffy squinted her eyes, a challenging smirk on her lips.“Oh, shut up!” Cyrus launched a baby carrot at the two of them, glaring as he glowed a shade of red brighter than Jonah’s apple. “That was a friendly exchange.”“Followed by him basically asking you out!” Andi giggled, leaning over the table to poke Cyrus in the stomach and steal a piece of his muffin. He giggled too, swatting at her retreating hand. “Rude!” He frowned at her playfully, “And it’s not a date! You heard him, we’re just getting the list done. Strictly business. In no fashion did he imply anything even remotely close to a date.” He threw his hands on the table, the denial of his own nerves evident to the other three. Jonah finally stirred from beside them, sighing rather loudly.“Sure, Cy-guy,” Jonah put his phone down again once more, snagging a piece of his muffin and popping it into his mouth before patting his back, “Whatever you gotta tell yourself.” The girls chuckled together deviously once again; Cyrus groaned before allowing himself to dissolve into his own fit of giggles. Despite all the teasing, he really did love his friends. -*-The brown-haired boy endured another two classes, which dwindled away the giddiness he felt during lunch. Sure he let his mind wander to the feeling of TJ’s arm around his shoulder or the look on his face before he walked away a few hours before, eyes soft and lips parted in his unfairly gorgeous smile, but for the most part, his classes had been so dull and so dragged out. That was until the final bell signaled that his Life Science class was over, and he eagerly leapt towards the door before any of his classmates could begin packing up their bags. He sped out the door, only to be grabbed immediately as he turned out, responding with a surprised shriek. “TJ! Oh my god. You scared me, dingus!” Cyrus smacked the blonde's shoulder, who was red in the face from laughter. Cyrus let out an indignant huff, "I thought we were supposed to meet at the bikes.""Oh god, that was priceless! Mr. Shay let us out early today, so I decided to pick you up here, but I couldn't resist scaring ya" TJ poked his side before wrapping an arm around the boy as they walked down the hall."Ugh, you're impossible!" Cyrus groaned, poking him back harder. TJ laughed again, this time the brunette joining in. "Alright, genius. What's on the agenda today?""I was thinking dinner and a movie," TJ smirked down at the boy, who's face had turned an impressive shade of crimson, "maybe a moonlit walk along the beach with some red wi-""I don't need to hear about your fantasies, Teej" Cyrus joked, holding his notebook tightly to his chest and praying his face wasn't as red as it felt. Had TJ always made such insufferably flirty sounding comments before, Cyrus wondered. If he had, they were becoming more frequent since the day they went roller-skating. Still, Cyrus tried not to overthink them too much and played along instead. Maybe this is how the straights joke around, he reasoned. "Seriously, where are we going?""I thought we could play a little one-on-one.""As in, like, basketball?" Cyrus raised his eyebrows in disbelief, fully remembering that "scoring a basketball goal" was written down on his stupid list. After watching two of his closest friends make more baskets than he could count, he wondered what it would be like to make one himself."No, in a game of Twister!" the blonde teased."Hardy, har, har. You're hilarious." The shorter boy deadpanned."Thanks for finally noticing" TJ smiled, pushing open a heavy door with his free arm. A door Cyrus now recognized to belong to the school's gym."You know I don't do sports." Cyrus grumbled with a pout."Come on, Cy. You've held a frickin snake for Pete's sake! I think you can handle shooting a basket" TJ smiled encourage, pushing him gently through the door. "Fine! Fine, but if I end up with a bloody nose, it's your funeral." Cyrus crossed his arms over his chest, walking past him to the bleachers to set down his stuff. Rationally, Cyrus knew that with TJ's help, he would be able to make at least one basket. Yet, he was reluctant to try and fail at something TJ did so gracefully and effortlessly, something the jock was passionate about. It was times like this when he wished he was more than just a clumsy concoction of gangly arms and legs. "That won't happen, Underdog." TJ said surely, reaching out and squeezing his friend's hand before dropping it and running off the court towards the locker rooms. Cyrus didn't even have time to question him before he came bounding back, dribbling a basketball with ease. He circled around the brunette swiftly still dribbling, causing the shorter boy to giggle at his antics. He spun around, making ridiculous shots, shooting over his shoulder, taking shots with one hand over his eyes, ripping hearty laughter from Cyrus, who was amazed that he still managed to make the ball go into the net with a clean swoosh every time. "Stop showing off, Basketball Boy." Cyrus giggled, running up from behind him and successfully (and surprisingly) stealing the ball from TJ's grasp and running towards the other side of the gym like a madman."Hey!" TJ sputtered, running after the boy, "That’s traveling!" He quickly gained on him, causing Cyrus to scream in panic and glee as he drew closer, before he wrapped his arms around the brunette's waist and spun him around in the air. The ball was discarded to the side while Cyrus screamed through wheezy and breathless laughter, squirming to get out of the blonde's hold."TJ, p-put me down this instant!" Cyrus attempted to sound commanding but the giggles that erupted from his small body gave him away. "If I must" TJ laughed, reluctantly releasing the boy's waist and picking up the neglected ball, "Alright, Cy, no more goofing off.""Pft, tell that to yourself." Cyrus joked, standing in front of the jock and extending his arms in front of himself, positioning himself in a squat, "Alright, I'm ready. Teach me your freakish jock ways, Maestro." TJ busted up at how ridiculously adorable the boy looked, resembling something close to a hobbit, "Relax before you hurt yourself." He patted the boy's shoulder, quickly switching into coach mode, hands on his hips. "Okay, Cy, I gotta see what I'm working with first so show me what you got."Cyrus frowned with wide eyes, "I got absolutely nothing, TJ.""You never know unless you try, Underdog." TJ smiled softly at him before directing him towards the three-pointer line. "Give me your best shot." "But-""Just shoot, Cyrus. I won't judge." TJ passed him the ball from the sideline, in a position to observe. The brunette fumbled to catch the dreadful orange thing but caught it nonetheless."Okay, fine." He was half-tempted to take a granny shot but ultimately decided against. Cyrus anxiously tossed the ball between his hands a few times, trying to ignore the feeling of TJ's studying gaze, before squatting down, bracing himself for the shot. He released the ball, jumping crookedly, both legs kicking up in the air, his arms leaning to the right with the force of the shot coming from his dominant arm, causing his aim to be slightly skewed to the right and hitting the backboard right of the net and bouncing wildly into the bleachers next to them. "Hey, that wasn't half bad Cy!" "Ugh, don't lie, Teej. I know I'm horrible" Cyrus pouted, his cheeks pink from the exertion and the mortification of the whole thing. "I'm serious, Underdog! You actually got some strength in those noodle arms!" TJ jested, softly pitching his upper arm fat.Cyrus glared at the other boy like a kicked puppy and launched the ball at the jock's stomach in retaliation, who caught it before it could slam into him, "That was rude and uncalled for. Besides, I do not have noodle arms! I keep my ping pong arms strong!" "I would flex so you could see what real gains look like, but I don't want to bruise your deluded ego, Cy. Or make you drool." TJ winked with the last comment, dribbling in between his legs mindlessly."I was promised actual instruction, not bullying." Cyrus scoffed."Okay, okay." TJ ceased his dribbling to study the brunette, eyeing up and down. A devious smirk crept up his face as Cyrus' cheeks colored steadily the longer the blonde looked at him, the smaller boy's gaze snapping down to his feet as he bit his lip. The taller boy took a step closer to him. "That really was a decent shot, Cy. You got a lot of power. Your form just needs some revising."TJ stood to Cyrus side, bumping their shoulders together before tapping the boy’s legs with the tip of his sneaker. “First, you gotta keep your legs straight. Trying to make a jump shot right now will just make things more complicated. Spread your feet to shoulder width apart… Little more. Perfect. Second, there’s this thing in basketball we have called a guiding hand and a follow through.” “English, please?”TJ chuckled fondly, “Watch me, yeah? So basically you hold the ball in front of your face with both hands, elbows bent-- I usually opt for a little below eye-level. When you shoot, you use your dominant hand to flick the ball towards the net, while the other hand acts more like a support, keeping your placement steady. Does that make sense?” “Uh, yeah. I think.” Cyrus’ eyebrows were furrowed and his head tilted as he scratched the side of his temple. The expression made TJ’s heart flip over his ribcage. “You wanna go again?” The blonde asked hopefully, handing the ball to the other boy. “I guess I got nothing to lose.” Cyrus shrugged. “That’s the spirit!” TJ chirped, patting his shoulder enthusiastically, “Make sure to really aim before you shoot, focus on shooting the ball directly towards the middle of the little black box on the backboard. And when you shoot, keep the ball balanced on your fingers, not on your palm.”“Copy that.” Cyrus replied, positioning himself in the way he remembered TJ telling him. He took the shot, bouncing up a little out of habit, and although the ball moved towards the net in a straighter line of motion, it aired balled a good two feet from the net. “Hey, shake it off. Just put a little more force in your wrist, Underdog.”Cyrus nodded, trying again. This time it touched the rim but bounced off towards the bleachers. TJ ran up to the ball, passing it back to the brunette who was feeling increasingly more discouraged and frustrated. “You got his, Cy.” TJ could practically see the self-deprecating comments swirling around inside his friend’s head.Cyrus nodded wordlessly before he took another shot. Miss. He took another. It flew behind the backboard. After another few missed tosses, he let out a frustrated growl, turning to TJ with a pout, “I can’t do it, Teej.” He placed a supportive hand on the brunette’s shoulder and gave it a squeeze, “You can do this. You’re just too in your head… Wait here, I got an idea.” Cyrus watched TJ run up to his phone, typing away with his thumbs before calling out, “Something you wanna hear?” “Huh?” he called out. TJ didn’t respond, and Cyrus started walking towards him until he heard the first notes of Old Town Road play loudly through overhead speakers he wasn’t even aware the gym had. He instantly started laughing, running up to his absurdly dancing best friend. “What the fuck, TJ!” “Language, Underdog!” TJ said in mock outrage but busting up the second Cyrus goes to swing at him, “This gym has blue tooth in here for some strange yet beautiful reason. I like to play music for the team when we’re doing drills, sometimes. Usually on Mondays when they’re slugging around the court, and Coach lets me take over. Really gets them in the zone.” “Ah, makes sense.” Cyrus said quickly, “Please for the love of my poor bleeding eardrums, turn this shit off before I lose more brain cells.” “Ooo, two in one day? You’re a bad boy now, Goodman.” TJ teased, “You wanna play DJ?” “Nah, I’m good, but if you play Bon Jovi again I’ll walk straight out of this gym.”“Hey, I’ll have you know that I’m starting to branch out from Classic Rock, Underdog.” TJ defended with pout, to prove his point an obnoxiously loud, head-splitting dubstep song rang out through the gym. Cyrus could hear the bass reverberating off the floor and up his feet. Cyrus cackled loudly, covering his ears with his hands, “I don’t know how you manage to have the music taste of both the worst type of teenage boy and my father.” “Hey you said I could choose.” TJ scoffed playfully. “I changed my mind.” Cyrus scrunched up his nose and bobbed his head mockingly, taking the phone out of TJ’s hand, “We need real music.” The beginning notes of “You Belong with Me” By Taylor Swift filled the air. TJ snorted aggressively.“Oh my god, you’re a yeehaw boy.” TJ cried out as Cyrus ran back towards the court dancing around when the first verse of the song began. “Come on, it’s a classic.” Cyrus yelled through a giggle, twirling around and nearly tripping on his shoelace. TJ joined him with a chuckle, grabbing his hands and jumping around with him. By the middle of the song, he rushed back to his phone and turned the volume down from ear-shattering to a good medium. “Alright, back to business.” TJ reminded a distracted Cyrus, who had stopped dancing to tie his shoe. “Okay, but can you change your whole teaching method? I don’t think it’s working for me.” Cyrus smirked challengingly as he stood up. “You’re making a basket if it’s the last thing either of us do, Underdog.” TJ smirked, his voice equally as challenging. He spun the brunette around towards their chosen net, before hesitating a few feet behind him. “Maybe you need a more… hands on approach.” To say TJ was suddenly nervous was an understatement. He felt his pulse speed up and his palms start to sweat as he took another small step towards the smaller boy, now in the vicinity to feel his body heat and smell his strawberry shampoo. He wished that he had turned the air conditioning up higher.He knew what he had to do, he’d done it a thousand times with some of his team members but never had it felt this… there wasn’t a word he could describe the feeling with. Well, the first word that sprang to his mind was intimate, but he quickly shook that off, taking another step to press his chest against Cyrus’ back. He prayed he wouldn’t come off as creepy. He felt the shorter boy tense up in front of him before he whirled his head around to gaze at the jock with a deer in the headlights expression.“Is this okay?” TJ whispered as he placed his hands firmly on Cyrus’ waist, feeling like if he spoke any louder, it would shatter whatever type of moment this had morphed into, and Cyrus would run screaming from the gym. Cyrus nodded, knowing if he opened up his mouth he’d say something incredibly stupid or shriek like a strangled cat because the skin TJ’s hands touched felt like it was on fire. Both boys felt like their hearts were ready to beat out off their chest; TJ paranoid that Cyrus could feel the hammering off his heartbeat against his back. The fell into a tense silence, until the music shuffled to another song. One that TJ didn’t recognize but had a distinct dreamy, country vibe to it. “Oh my god! I love Kacey Musgraves.” Cyrus exclaimed with a giant, nosy scrunching grin that made TJ want to melt on the spot. The tensity between them melted away. “You really are a yeehaw boy.” TJ smiled fondly at the boy, tightening his hold on his waist. Cyrus’ his heart flipped at the more intense contact, turning away from the boy to face the net again, his voice soft as he spoke, “So, what’s next?” TJ was expecting some kind of sassy remark, ready to retaliate, but the softness of the brown-haired boy’s voice, the feeling of Cyrus pressed against him, and the undeniably sappy lyrics of the song that danced around them had his head spinning. All his witty comebacks died on his tongue.“Now, get your arms in position like I told you, elbows bent… Yeah that’s it, Cy.” TJ lifted their arms together, one hand molded over the other boy’s on the ball, speaking directly into Cyrus’ ear, so soft and gentle Cyrus felt like his knees would give out from underneath him. It didn’t help that the song had reached the chorus at the exact moment. Now you're lifting me up, instead of holding me down
Stealing my heart instead of stealing my crown
If TJ felt as nervous as Cyrus did, he didn’t show it, continuing to speak directions into his ear. “Now you just let go.” They flicked the ball together, Cyrus pressed so closely to TJ that he could feel the vibrations of TJ’s laughter rolling down his back when the ball went through the net.
I didn't know him and I didn't know me
Cloud nine was always out of reach
“See? Easy as pie.” TJ said, looking down at Cyrus with an easy smile. He hadn’t let go of Cyrus’ waist yet.
Now I remember what it feels like to fly
“I like cake more.” Cyrus smiled up at him coyly.
You give me butterflies.
“I know you do, Cy.” TJ laughed, and Cyrus could feel TJ’s breath on his face and for a split second it felt like TJ’s arms had snaked themselves tighter around his waist. He started to panic.“Can I try it alone?” Cyrus squeaked out, rushing towards the ball that had rolled a few feet in front of them. TJ inhaled deeply, scratching the back of his neck before clapping his hands together, “Okay, Underdog. This is the shot. I can feel it.”“Don’t jinx me!” Cyrus exclaimed with a chuckle, positioning himself directly on the three-point line. The song had faded out to another Taylor song, something that didn’t make him want to throw caution to the wind and kiss TJ as they swayed to its melody. God, he was a frickin sap. He shoved those dangerous thoughts away, closing his eyes to ground himself, before opening them, and taking the shot before he could hesitate or overthink his life choices. To his surprise and to TJ’s inkling, the ball fell through the net cleanly, with a satisfying swoosh. “You did it! You did it!” TJ cheered, wrapping Cyrus up in his arms before he could even think about it.“I did it?! I did it!” Cyrus’ smile rivaled the brightness of the gym’s fluorescent lighting as he reciprocated the hug, wrapping his arms around the blonde’s neck. He was so close that he could make out that TJ had blonde eyelashes mixed into his dark ones and that his cheeks were peppered with a few sporadic freckles. He struggled to look over every detail of the boy’s face before they pulled away, wanting to commit this image of TJ to his long-term memory. “Wanna try again?” TJ motioned to the net with his head, but he didn’t dare rip his eyes from Cyrus’ brown doe ones. “No, I wanna stay like this.” Cyrus placed his head gently on TJ’s shoulder, tickling his neck with his warm breaths, “I’m cold.” TJ felt the butterflies in his stomach erupt in a chaotic frenzy, “How are you cold?! I’m overheating in here.”“That’s cuz you’re sweaty.” Cyrus giggled from little spot on TJ’s shoulder, digging his face in the boy’s shirt. TJ could only explain this feeling as completely and utter fondness, pulling the boy closer to him. “You’re mean, Underdog.” TJ whined into the boy’s hair, causing the boy pressed against him to giggle more. TJ didn’t think he ever felt more content in his entire life, here in the empty gym, holding his best friend and swaying to the faint Taylor Swift song playing on the overhead speakers. That was, until it wasn’t empty anymore. They both heard the heavy doors of the gym squeal as they were forcefully opened, both pulling apart in blink and standing a good five feet away from each other like they hadn’t just been vertically cuddling. “What the fuck goes on Teejie-Weejie?” came the mock shrill voice of no other than Reed Miller, TJ’s most favorite team member, with Lester and another taller boy Cyrus didn’t recognize on either side of him. Great, just my luck, TJ thought begrudgingly. “Are you guys playing fucking Taylor Swift?!” They three of them howled with laughter like a small irritating pack of hyenas.TJ rolled his eyes in annoyance, instinctively taking a step in front of Cyrus, “Nothing major. Just showing Cyrus how to make a proper basket.” He decided responding civilly to Reed was the best way to prevent the collision of his fist to the blonde idiot’s face, as much as he would’ve enjoyed that. He didn’t want Cyrus to see that side of him ever again, and now he felt that he didn’t want to allow himself to get to that point for his own sake, too. “Oh, thank god, I thought we walked in on you guys making out or something.” Reed sneered, Lester and what’s his name sniggering beside him. “If Cardigan’s blush is anything to go by.” Cyrus’ face turned an inhuman shade of red as he prayed that TJ wouldn’t turn around to see his frightening blush. TJ instead pinched the bridge of his nose, focusing all of his concentration on staying cool. “You better shut the fuck up, Reed. We’re going anyway.” TJ glared the three athletes down, grabbing Cyrus by the wrist and pulling him towards the bleachers to their bags. “Aw, so soon?” Reed whined in the same shrill voice, “I wanted to see Cardigan’s balling skills.” “Maybe another time,” TJ shot him the most insincere smile he could muster, disconnecting his phone from the gym’s blue tooth and hastily pulling Cyrus towards the heavy doors. Cyrus clumsily threw the strap of his bag over his shoulder, struggling to keep up with TJ’s fast pace as he yelled out a meek, “Bye!” as they exited the gym. The smaller boy took a good look at the other boy, who was red in the face, chest heaving with deep and frequent inhales. Cyrus gently pulled the boy by the sleeve of his sweatshirt to guide him by the side of the outside lockers, hoping he wasn’t on the verge of a panic attack. “Teej, are you okay?” He asked, looking up at his best friend with concern, squeezing his forearm to try and comfort him. TJ seemed to relax with the squeeze, but his mind wouldn’t stop racing. He hated how Reed had interrupted whatever was happening between Cyrus and himself, hated how much he never wanted it to end. Mostly he resented how much Reed’s presence alone made him feel trapped, a fear and confusion shooting threw him similar to that of when he found out his father was sick. “Yeah, think so.” TJ’s voice trailed off with his thoughts, “Just stuff.” “Hey, I get it.” Cyrus’ voice was so soft TJ wanted to cry right there and then, “You want to talk about it?” “No, I’m good, really.” TJ swallowed down his pain. He knew this was something he wasn’t ready to talk about with the boy, not yet, at least. “Thank you for… caring, though. You’re the best.”Cyrus practically beamed at him. “You never have to thank me for caring, TJ. And I’m always here to talk if you change your mind.” “I’ll keep that in mind, Underdog.” TJ smiled fondly at the boy, ruffling his hair in a way that always gave Cyrus butterflies. They walked down the hallway together, their arms and fingers brushing past each other’s with every step. “Your mom picking you up, Cy?” “Yeah, you want a ride?” Cyrus asked, opening the door of the school’s entrance. “Sure, that’d be great,” TJ responded, wrapping an arm around the boy’s shoulders.And in the hurried events of the last ten minutes, Cyrus didn’t notice that his science notebook was left abandoned on the bottom bleacher of the school’s gym, where Reed and his posse stayed shooting hoops. -*-TJ heard a sharp knock on the door of his bedroom. He pulled out one of his earbuds before calling out an impatient, “Come in!” The door opened with a flourish, revealing a very smiley Amber, sporting a pink crop top and glittery lipgloss, her hair falling down in waves down her back. She flopped onto the bed beside him. “Hey, Teddy. Whatcha listening to?” She asked, an oddly innocent smile on her face as she popped his dangling earbud in. He blushed slightly; he had been playing that Kacey Musgraves song on repeat for the last hour he spent home alone. “Wow, I didn’t know you listened to actual music, T.” Amber teased playfully, “Especially not to something so sappy.” TJ shrugged, trying to act nonchalant, “Cyrus showed it to me today.”“Oh my god!” Amber squealed, “It’s your guy’s first song!”“Our first song?” TJ asked incredulously, shaking his head at the blonde girl.“Yeah, if you guys were in some cheesy ass rom-com it would be the song they played during your first kiss,” She gushed, holding both hands up to her cheek with a wistful grin. “You’re a doofus,” TJ groaned with a smile, punching her arm softly. “And you’re totally whipped.” “Hey, you’re one to talk. I know an Amber date night outfit when I see one.” TJ poked her thigh through the rips in her mom jeans, wiggling his eyebrows at her. “Pft, it wasn’t a date; that’s for sure.” Amber huffed, throwing herself onto TJ’s pillow and sinking into its coolness. “Who were you with, then?” TJ smirked at her, feigning cluelessness. “None of your beeswax.”He held out his palm to her, pointedly looking into her eyes, “Hand, please.” He commanded. She obliged with a bewildered look as he drew her hand closer to his face, eyeing the new yellow and baby pink beaded bracelet she was wearing. He stopped to take a whiff of her palm. “Don’t sniff my hand, you freak!” She cried out in laughter, pressing her hand on her brother’s face roughly. “You’re wearing a new bracelet, and your hand smells like mod podge.” TJ reported like he had just stumbled upon a scientific breakthrough, "You were at Andi Shack, huh?”“Why the fuck do you know what mod podge smells like?”“Honestly, I have no idea.” TJ chuckled, “But stop deflecting.”“Fine, if you must know... I was at Andi Shack.” Amber confessed with a shy smile, twirling the beads of the bracelet between her fingers. “So it was a date then. Did you guys kiss?” TJ shot a shit-eating grin at his sister, raising up his hands to make his fingers resemble two people kissing. Amber smacked him in the head, laughing sarcastically, “Just know if you wake up tomorrow with only one eyebrow, it’s nobody’s fault but your own, Teddy.” She rolled off of his bed, heading towards the door before looking back over her shoulder, “And for the record, we didn’t kiss because I don’t like her .” She was out the door, her golden hair swaying as she reached out to close it when she heard TJ speak in a small voice. “Wait!-- Ambs?” “Yeah, T?” Amber questioned, leaning on his door frame, her sea green eyes lit up with surprise at his tone.“I think...I think I really like Cyrus” TJ admitted through a wet laugh. She shot him a blinding smile.“Really?” Amber rushed to sit beside him on the bed, taking both of his hands with her own. “Yeah, and I think I want to tell him… tell him-”“That you’re…?”“Gay… That I’m gay.” TJ smiled, tears gathering around in the ducts of his eyes. I can’t believe I just said that out loud, he thought with a gasp, fresh tears rolling down his cheeks. “Oh, Teddy.” Amber cried out with a soft grin, wrapping her arms around him in a tight embrace, “I’m so, so proud of you, little bro.” “Thanks, big sis.” TJ joked, but then fear settle behind his teary eyelashes, “...God, I-I’m just so scared… What if he doesn’t, doesn’t accept me? What if he never wants to speak to me again?”“I promise you, T, Cyrus isn’t like that. Besides, if he is anything less than absolutely supportive and accepting then I will delete his kneecaps.” Her brother scoffed playfully. “Oh, please. You wouldn’t do that to Andi’s best friend.” TJ said with a fond eye roll.“Try me.” Amber smiled challengingly, bumping the side of her head with TJ’s. “Are you sure you’re ready to tell him?”“Maybe. It’s just if I tell him, and he likes boys, too, I might not be able to stop myself from making my dumb crush more obvious than it already is.”“Is that a bad thing?” Amber asked gently. “Yes, No, I don’t know, maybe!” TJ exclaimed, covering his eyes with both hands in frustration, “Even if he does like boys, why would he like me? He’s so annoyingly adorable and I’m so, me.” Amber frowned at him, taking his hands off his eyes, “Sure, you’re not exactly my cup of tea,” she teased, earning a hard eye roll from the boy, “But, any boy would be lucky enough to be graced by your presence, T. Let alone for you to show them the time of day. He’d be a real dummy to not realize that.” “I think that might be the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me, Ambs.” TJ hugged her tightly, smashing her temple roughly against his own. “Don’t mention it. Seriously, don’t.” Amber giggled, pushing her silly brother away with a fake look of disgust. “You’re rude!” TJ frowned playfully. “Hey, I’m a Kippen! It runs in the family.” “True that…” TJ’s voice trailed off. He couldn’t believe how much had changed in the last few months he’d known Cyrus. He stormed into his life completely uninvited, cardigans and brown doe eyes and all, and TJ was gone before he even helped him get that first muffin. And how could he not be? Cyrus wormed his way into TJ’s cold black heart without even trying, and with becoming a permanent resident there, his heart bloomed, taking on a color so bright that it physically hurt in his chest. “I want you it’s your choice who you tell and when. You know that, right?” Amber gripped her brother’s shoulder, giving it an encouraging squeeze. “Yeah, I do. It’s just that if by some completely off chance that Cyrus does like me back, I know I’d want to shout it from the rooftops. That means coming out to everyone else. People at school, the team, Mom and Dad… It’s just a lot.” TJ sighed, running a hand roughly through his hair that was now lacking its usual gel. “Anyone worth giving a shit about will love you no matter what,” Amber grabbing his hands, “And even if a few assholes can’t handle someone being gay in 2019, screw them. This is a part of you, and if they think there’s something wrong with that, then that’s on them. You’re no different, Teddy.” “Wow, that was almost poetic, Ambs.” TJ said with a chuckle, wiping at his eyes with the sleeve of his hoodie, “Thank you, though. I love you.”“I try.” Amber said with a flourish, flipping a strand of hair over her shoulder, “I love you too, you goof.” “I just wish I knew if this was the right time. I really don’t want to screw this up.” TJ groaned, throwing his hand back into his pillow like the girl had done early. “Maybe we should ask for a sign from the Universe!” Amber exclaimed with excited eyes. “A sign from the Universe, huh?” TJ chuckled, shaking his head, “I think you’ve been spending too much time with Andi.”Amber leaned back into the pillow beside her brother, sighing, “I think you might be right.” She laughed before getting up on her feet. “Just think everything over, T. You don’t need to have all the answers tonight.” Amber smiled over her shoulder, grabbing the door handle, “And even though you guys would be completely nauseating together, I think he’d be really good for you, TJ.” TJ gave her a small smile at that before it morphed into something more twisted, “So, when are telling Andi?” “Okay, conversation over!” Amber yelled out, swinging the door closed behind her. “Hey, you’re no fun!” TJ hollered, knowing she’d hear it through the thin walls. He heard a door slam in response, and he laughed under his breath.And if he laid in his bed listening to the same song on repeat while texting Cyrus all that night, well no one but him and his Spotify play history would ever know.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Cyrus loved to sleep; his own personal mantra being that a good nap or night’s rest could fix most-- if not all-- of life’s problems. There were only two times in life when he avoided sleep like a disease, however. First, when his parents’ marriage began to unravel at the seams with screaming matches and slamming doors, disintegrating in his fingers before he could even think of how to sew it back together. His fear lingered through the months that lead up to their official divorce, it climaxing the night they signed the papers. Second was when he laid paralyzed with fear in his bed the entire week after his Bubbe Rose died. It rained for seven days straight, its soft patter keeping him company through the night. These were the times where sleep did not alleviate life’s problems, but rather magnified them with distortion and perversion through throat clenching, skin-singeing nightmares. So when things began to crumble in his waking life, he grew to anticipate their arrival, but once in a while, his mind loved to pull the rug out from under him just when he thought he was safe.Waking up with a violent jolt and realizing his skin and bed sheets were damp with a cold sweat was not his preferred way to start that morning.
Walking alongside a line of unleveled grass, Cyrus was completely aware that one wrong step would send him plummeting to the bottom of a seaside cliff. He placed one foot in front of the other, his arms outreached to keep him balanced as hummed a zemirot, an old hymn his Bubbe sang when she tended to her vegetable garden, in his own little world of bliss. He didn’t register that someone was screaming his name, telling him to step away from the edge until it was too late. He lost his footing, slipping and reaching out blindly to grip the rough granite edge. He wasn’t strong enough to pull himself up; he looked around frantically, crying out for help.
Standing at the edge was a group of people, the first face amongst the crowd he processed belong to Buffy, who was tittering wildly, Andi and Jonah beside her. “He’s so helpless! Can’t even walk in a straight line. What are we going to do with him?!”
Cyrus was confused, feeling something warm and wet falling on his cheeks. His blurred vision made out the outlines of his four parents, all wearing matching expressions of disappointment. “Where did we go wrong? We expect so much more from you, Motek.” His father’s voice dripped with disdain, the boy vaguely making out a low shake of his head as turned away and walked into the darkness.
Cyrus’ tried to grip the ledge tighter, but his hands began to feel limp, tears streaming faster once the chanting began, the faces of his friends, family and peers calling out “Failure! Failure! Failure!” over and over with a conviction like it was law. His clouded vision swiftly morphed into a heightened sense of sight, the sharp clarity of eyesight jarring and overwhelming. Their faces were flat and expanded like he was looking into a fishbowl, their smiles twisted and sinister and growing like the branches of a looming tree. The chanting grew louder and louder, and one arm gave out, his other arm shaking from the weight of his body in desperation to cling on. He was getting tired, feeling his final arm giving out. He looked out in the angry crowd, his eyes falling on a boy in the middle.
TJ stood there, a stoic expression on his face, his arms crossed off his chest. He was silent, his face hard, but upon meeting Cyrus’ eye, his hard resolve began to crack, something close to terror flickering behind his eyes. A broken “TJ” weakly escaped the brunette boy, and the boy in the middle sprung forward, pushing past the crashing waves of people and reaching out his hand. But it was too late. Cyrus fell off the edge into the dark sea. Cyrus kept falling, falling falling…
The boy didn’t realize he was awake until his alarm went off a few minutes later, his pillow soaked in tears and his sheets wrapped tightly around his legs. He didn’t realize he was sobbing. It had felt so real, but then again, they always felt so real. As soon as it came, it was gone, the disturbing images dissipating from his mind like water down the drain. Cyrus laid still for a while, staring blankly at the white of his ceiling, his chest rising and falling rapidly with each shaky breath. The sound of his alarm tone was still ringing in his ears until he slowly turned over to silence it. He rubbed the sweat and tears out of his bleary eyes before looking at his phone screen and feeling his heart sink as the picture of him, Andi, Buffy, and Jonah came into view. He knew that his friends would never act so cruelly to him in real life, but his nightmares had a talent of convincing him that his subconscious fears held truth, to some degree. He groaned into his pillow, hoping to shake the funk of the dream that clung stubbornly to him. He took a peek out the window, his eyes searching to find the sun but were unfortunately met with a dense grey sky. So, it was one of those days, he thought forlornly. He got ready for school in a sluggish daze, his eyes avoiding the temptation of sinking into his mattress and away from the world. After haphazardly throwing on an outfit, he made his way to the bathroom before the soft chime of his phone stopped him in his tracks. His breath hitched slightly as his eyes fell on the screen, which housed a new text from TJ. Teej ^-^: Good Morning, Lebron. Cyrus snorted, his face twitching with a smile.Underdog <3: who?Teej ^-^: Lebron… James… T-The basketball playerUnderdog <3: ???Teej ^-^: Please tell me you’re not serious...Teej ^-^: You know what, nevermind, I can’t talk to someone so unculturedTeej ^-^: SmhUnderdog <3: WAAAIT i was kidding :(((( don’t leave :(((Underdog <3: not sure why you’re calling me Lebron James tho Teej ^-^: Did I not witness you making a three-point basket, yesterday?Teej ^-^: Don’t be so modest, CyUnderdog <3: omg shut up you goof!Underdog <3: that was pure, dumb luckUnderdog <3: really surprised i didn’t eat shit, tbh Underdog <3: n e way, was there a point to your text or did you just stop in to say hello? Teej ^-^: Ouch, SOMEBODY’S grumpyUnderdog <3: ugh sorry :/ i didn’t sleep well last night, kinda got a headacheTeej ^-^: Oh :( I’m sorry. You want to talk about it?Underdog <3: nah, there’s nothing really to talk about, just sucks is all Teej ^-^: FELT THATTeej ^-^: But if you’re sure… Underdog <3: yeah i am :) thanks TJ Well, that was kind of a lie, Cyrus’ brain supplied unhelpfully. TJ took a bit longer to reply, his dot bubble popping up and disappearing in hesitation multiple times. Cyrus chose to ignore how unusual that was as he entered his bathroom, opening up the mirrored cabinet to swallow a few Tylenols and brush his teeth. Teej ^-^: Okay, good :) But yeah, actually there is something. Do you mind if we meet up a little bit before class? Cyrus heart jumped like a fish out of water, nearly choking on the toothpaste in his mouth. He quickly rinsed his mouth and replied back to TJ with shaky fingers. Underdog <3: yeah, sure :) cya in 15? Teej ^-^: yee :)))Cyrus rolled his eyes before pocketing his phone, grabbing his shoes and backpack and rushing out the door. Since his dad had already left for work, his stepmom sat alone at the dining table draped in a silky pink robe, sipping her usual morning coffee. “Good morning, dear.” She smiled cheerfully at him before her expression took on something he could only described as amused distaste, watching him bustle around the kitchen for his keys and water canteen. “Someone in a hurry?” “Mornin’,” the boy called out in response, leaning against his fridge to slip on his shoes, “Yeah, I gotta meet TJ before school so I’m heading out now.” He walked out towards the door before a sharp hand stopped him mid-step. “Before breakfast?” Leslie challenged, raising an eyebrow. “Ugh! I can’t today. I’m in a hurry.” Cyrus whined. She shook her head disapprovingly, handing him a banana and a granola bar, “Take these at least.”“Fine, fine.” He threw her a sweet smile, leaning down to peck her cheek before rushing towards the door again, “Thank you! Love you! See you later!”“Love you, too, honey! You better eat!” She hollered after him as he shut the door. Despite how insistent Leslie could be, he always appreciated how much she pushed him and his father to take good care of themselves, especially his father, who had a tendency to skip meals altogether and live off cups of coffee and stale crackers when his workload was high. Cyrus tried to stay grateful for a lot of things. Right now he was grateful that the walk to Jefferson Middle School was only a five to six minute walk from his place, give or take. Before he knew it, his granola bar was gone, and he was crossing through the school’s parking lot-- cautiously, of course-- and making his way towards his first period classroom. He spotted a messy tuff of familiar blonde hair in the school’s main corridor and could barely fight back a smile. Completely oblivious to the brunette boy making his way to him, TJ leaned lazily against a locker, face buried in a novel, which Cyrus quickly noted as his copy of Brand New World before creeping up and serving some well deserved revenge. “Still not done, huh? You slacker!” Cyrus whispered directly into the blonde’s eye causing the poor boy to jump out of his skin like the scaredy cat he was. Cyrus dissolved into a fit of laughter as TJ regained his senses and a scandalized grin came across his face. “Trying to give a man a heart attack, Underdog?” TJ deadpanned, smacking him on the side once with his book, yet his expression appeared almost impressed, “And for your information, I only have like 20 pages left.” “Whatever you do, don’t read it in public. Unless you’re a pretty crier, which I highly doubt.” Cyrus shot him a cheeky smile, leaning against the locker beside him. “Wow, way to spoil it, Cyrus!” TJ whined, gently bumping his shoulder against the other boy’s, “You’re awfully prickly today. Maybe I should rethink giving you a surprise.” His smile quickly grew smug as he tutted under his breath. “Surprise?” Cyrus exclaimed in delight, turning towards TJ and leaning into him like a happy puppy. He was too caught up in his excitement to notice the soft pink flush that danced across TJ’s cheeks at the close contact. The brown-haired boy sure did love a good surprise, especially when they came unprompted by himself. “No, tell me, Teej. I’m really sorry.” He looked at TJ pleadingly, his eyebrows drawn together and a hopeful smile on his lips, an expression that caused TJ’s brain to lapse for a moment.“I don’t know, Cy. The wounds you’ve caused me are too deep.” TJ quipped dramatically, although he could feel pretend reluctance wearing thin.“Come on, please! Is baby taters and a milkshake a good enough bribe? Andi, Buffy, Jonah, and I were gonna get some after last period.” “Well, I guess,” TJ relented, rolling his eyes good-naturedly. “You really don’t have to, though. I don’t want to crash your plans.”“Hey, they’re your friends, too! And think of it as an early thanks for all your help with my list.” Cyrus shrugged his shoulders, a half smile on his lips. “Well, if you insist,” TJ returned his smirk. Cyrus pulled out his phone to shoot the group chat that TJ would be joining them The Spoon after school. “Lemme just tell them you’re coming, then.”“Aight.” TJ replied, an easy smile on his lips, as he watched the boy type with nimble fingers. The Buff: UGH, seriously? Don’t I see enough of Kippen already?Andi MacknCheese: Buffy play nice. This is Cyrus’ future boyfriend you’re talking about here. JB: 👀👀 Cyrus’ heart leap in his chest upon reading Andi’s text, his heartbeat only slowing when he looked up and realized that TJ was again engrossed in his book. Cy-guy: DKSKFOKWEOGJVOCy-guy: ANDI STOP Cy-guy: YOU ABSOLUTE DISGRACEAndi MacknCheese: i call it how i see it, kid The Buff: I gtg. There’s a protein bar with my name on it. The Buff: And fine, I guess Basketball Boy can come. The Buff: But if he says something stupid nothing I say or do can be held against me. Cy-guy: yay! thank you, the actual light of my life.The Buff: And don’t you forget it :)Andi MacknCheese: Hey what about me?! >:(JB: & ME?!Cy-guy: *crickets*The Buff:: lmfaoThe Buff: Wbk I’M the favorite. Now stop blowing up my phone. Andi MacknCheese: Ha! It’s cute that you think tha-“Cy?” A hand waved in front of the brunette’s face, interrupting him mid-text, effectively bringing him back to reality. “Sorry,” Cyrus winced, his cheeks tinged with red, “I got carried away. They’re cool with you coming, though!” TJ grinned brightly, “Awesome! Do you think they’d mind if I brought Marty along? He’s been asking me about our little field trip on Saturday, and I don’t have much info to relay him.” “Oh, sure. That sounds-- Oh, wait. No! Crap! Crap, crap, crap, crap!” Cyrus spoke frantically, his wide eyes darting from TJ to the floor to the ceiling and back again. “Oh my god, what?”“I forgot to tell them that I invited Marty… and Amber, too.” Cyrus bit down on his lip harshly. TJ’s expression flashed with one of panic, his skin draining of its cool, but he seemed to still himself rather quickly. “Hey don’t worry! We can tell them together after school. No biggie, right?” “I’m sure Andi will be thrilled. Jonah’s as cool as a cucumber. It’s just Buffy I’m worried about. She loves Amber, that’s not a problem. It’s just… Marty. I can already hear her now. ‘Marty?! You mean that creepy benchwarmer who told me he ate a live frog once?!’” Cyrus squawked.“Hey, she might be cool about it!” This earned a dubious look from Cyrus. TJ chuckled but it sounded a bit manic, “Or she might kill me.”“Teej, my man. I hope for your sake it’s the former.” Cyrus sent him a teasing smile. The hallways were trickling in more students, signaling to TJ that class would be starting soon. “Oh, before I completely forget. I wanted to ask you something.” TJ looked away from the brunette and towards the speckled tiles of the school’s floor, rubbing at the nape of his neck. Admittedly, Cyrus was taken aback by TJ’s change in demeanor. He rarely even saw the athlete look anything resembling nervousness, at least at school. “Sure, TJ. I’m all ears.” He answered, his voice soft. “So it’s about the surprise… it’s kinda lame now that I think about it-- I just thought it might be a cool idea to…” He trailed off, reluctantly meeting Cyrus’ eye. He had half-expected a look of exasperation at his lack of tact and skill at the English language, but Cyrus stood there patiently, his bright eyes eager and encouraging, and he felt his nerves ease up a bit, at least enough to form cohesive thoughts. “So you had camping on your list, right?. I thought you could come over tomorrow night, and we could camp out in my backyard. I know it sounds kinda lame because it’s not exactly the same thing, but technically it is camping, just minus the camping site. But we’d be in a tent and all, you know. And we could make smores on the grill! And, that way you, me, and Amber could all carpool to the Lagoon on Saturday morning, so it would be like killing two birds with one stone, and oh my god I’m rambling, what the hell’s wrong with me--”“TJ, that’s a great idea!” Cyrus was practically beaming now, bouncing lightly on the balls of his feet. The brunette couldn’t believe his luck, not only was he partaking in his first official sleepover, if you weren’t counting the time when he was eight, and he stayed over at his Rabbi’s home for his son’s birthday and then got homesick and cried and had his parents pick him up before 9 pm. He definitely didn’t. No, this was the real deal, and it was with no other than TJ Kippen, his best friend turned crush.“Really?” TJ smiled unsurely, a giddy feeling traveling up his chest at the sight of Cyrus’ radiating happiness. “Yes, totally! It’s like all the fun of camping, but with the comfort of civilization being a few feet away! And the promise that we won’t be mauled by vicious animals.” TJ chuckled heartily, “Don’t be so sure. You’ve obviously never seen how angry raccoons can get.”“Haha, yeah...” The grin from Cyrus’ face slipped, “Wait, Huh?!”Their classmate’s began to file into the door of their first period class. He turned back to the brunette with a mischievous smile, “Oh, nothing! Now, come on. Class’s in session.” -*- “How fucking dare you say that to me?! That’s it, this friendship is over.”“Just accept it, Buffy! Studio Ghibli tramples Pixar in every aspect!” Cyrus pointedly ignores her comment, leaning forward into the table of their large booth seat and arguing with large dramatic gestures. TJ turned to the boy beside him, his eyes fond but his eyebrows furrowed challengingly. “Sorry, Underdog, but I gotta agree with Driscoll on this one. Pixar’s film scores beat Ghibli’s ass into the sand. Have you even listen to Ratatouille’s? Inside Out’s? Michael Giacchino is fucking masterful!” “But, Teej! Ghibli’s storytelling is superb! I’ve seen you cry like a baby during Grave of the Fireflies.” “Everyone cries during that movie, Cy, so that doesn’t count. You’re the same way with Coco.”“But the production value!” Cyrus sputtered, a look of betrayal written on his face.Buffy scoffed, holding up a bottle of ketchup, “I swear to God if you say production value one more time I’ll squirt you right in the forehead.” “Let’s just agree that they’re both great in their own way? Okay, happy now?” TJ supplied.“Not until she admits-”“Hey guys!” Jonah’s voice interrupted Cyrus mid-sentence, pulling up a chair at the table’s end. “What goes on, people?!” Andi announced herself as she slid into the seat opposite of Cyrus and next to Buffy, snatching her cup and taking a sip of her Mountain Dew with a grimace, “Ew, I thought this was Sprite!” “Serves you right for drinking off people without their permission.” Buffy snarks, taking her cup back and gulping it down with a dramatic sigh, “Just winning the ye olde Pixar vs. Studio Ghibli debate.” “You were not!” came Cyrus’ indignant response. “Well, I love both, but as long as we all agree that Don Bluth films takes the cake, I can respect all other decisions.” Andi laughed, looking around the Spoon to flag down a waitress. “Oh no argument. An American Tail was my childhood.” TJ clapped his hands together excitedly.Buffy laughed, the coils of her hair springing up and down, “Agreed. Anatasia is totally badass.”“I don’t know, The Troll in Central Park kind of freaks me out.” Jonah added, his eyes wide.“Oh, that’s such a Jonah answer.” Andi teased playfully, shaking her head. “He can grow plants out of his thumb! It’s unnatural!” “And talking cars and large spirit dragons are?”“How do I have no idea what you guys are talking about?” Cyrus questioned, looking between all of them with his eyebrows raised high on his face. “Oh my god, are you serious?” TJ and Jonah say together, exchanging an odd look and bursting into laughter. Buffy asked incredulously, “Have you not seen a Don Bluth movie?”“Uh, no?” “How is that possible? In our seven year friendship, I haven’t watched Thumbelina with you? Not once?!” Andi exclaimed. Cyrus shrugged across from her, smiling meekly. “How can we even trust your opinions on film if you aren’t even educated, Underdog,” TJ quipped tauntingly, “The Land Before Time is based solely around dinosaurs. How have not seen that one at least?”“Hey, sue me! Those movies are ancient. I grew up on cable and Disney DVD releases,” He rolled his eyes at them all, turning to the blonde athlete, “Not all of our parents are vintage and cool or whatever with their an odd collection of VHS tapes like yours, Teej!” “It’s literally on Netflix!” “Don’t you guys ever hang out anywhere else?” A flowing head of blonde hair came into view, tied up in a loose ponytail. Amber placed a pink manicured hand on the table, shooting them a bright smile, her waitress notepad in hand. “Amber!” Andi exclaimed, partly in shock and in excitement like seeing the blonde waitress at the diner was an unlikely occurrence. “Hey Bambi” Amber greeted the pixie-haired girl with a coy smirk, sliding into the booth next to her and effectively squishing Buffy against the wall. Cyrus and Buffy exchanged a look simultaneously mouthing ‘Bambi?’ with the same amused intrigue while TJ smirked knowingly, watching the girls lean into each other and speak giddily as they embraced.He rolled his eyes, turning back to his friend sat next to him with an amused huff, “At least I know what movie we’re watching tomorrow night.” “You’re gonna force me to watch the dusty movie?” Cyrus pouted. TJ rolled his eyes fondly, bumping their shoulders together, “You’re going to love it, I promise.”“Okay, fine.” Cyrus complied, albeit begrudgingly, “But if I don’t, you have to let me choose the pizza toppings.”TJ grimaced, “Which means…”“Pineapples.” they finished together.“You’re a monster.”Someone cleared their throat, turning their attention to the blonde girl smiling mischievously at them.“Can I help you?” TJ’s soft grin quickly morphing into something more smug.Amber scoffed, a playful scowl on her face. “Well, I had to get your attention, somehow.” TJ’s eyes narrowed. “What’s that supposed to mean?” “You just seemed…” Her eyes flitted to the boy beside her brother before returning the blonde’s gaze, her eyes aflame in an almost alarming way, “a little preoccupied.”“You’re sure one too talk.” TJ retorted instantly, his eyes flickering to Andi, who was screeching at some gross video on Jonah’s Twitter feed. Cyrus stared between them as they started a silent mental boxing match with their eyes. “I didn’t realize you guys knew each other.” Buffy piped up, an eyebrow lifted and her lips pursed. Jonah chuckled, his head tilted to the side with an easy smile.“Wow, you guys really don’t know that they’re siblings?” “Siblings?!” Buffy and Andi exclaimed at the same time, Andi coughing and sputtering while Buffy whacked at her back, prompting TJ and Cyrus to erupt into a loud fit of laughter. “Did you know about this?” Buffy locked eyes with Cyrus, staring at him accusingly. The brown-haired boy lifted his hands in surrender, his face bright red from the laughing. “Hey, I barely found out like two weeks ago. Jonah’s known way longer and never said anything.” “Amber mentioned it casually one day in passing.” Jonah shrugged, looking up from his phone.
I just assumed you guys knew.” “Huh,” was all that Buffy said, her jaw slacked, staring between the two blondes with wide eyes, “It kinda makes sense.” “I guess I see the resemblance.” Andi added, tilting her head to examine them both. “Ha, TJ wishes he was as pretty as me!” Amber quipped, raising her eyebrows at him with a small smirk. “If this is what pretty is,” he smiled thinly, gesturing to her face, “then you can keep it.”Instead of retorting, Amber opted to give him a little kick under the table, turning her head to see her manager gesturing angrily to come over. “Ugh, duty calls.” the blonde girl huffed, standing up and smoothing down her uniform, “I know all your usuals. Be back in a second.” “Thanks, Amber.” Andi called after her, the rest making sounds of gratitude. “You know, I still can’t believe Jonah knew about this before us.” Buffy scoffed up at the ceiling. “I have my moments.” The frisbee player shrugged, earning a group chuckle to erupt from the booth. “Anything else you’ve conveniently forgot to mention?” Buffy asked half-jokingly, not really expecting any real answer. Cyrus and TJ exchanged an anxious look. “Well, actually… about that-”“Sorry I’m late!” A large familiar dopey grin is the first thing Cyrus saw, immediately surging hot panic through him as he turned towards the owner of said voice. “Oh, h-hey, Marty!” TJ’s voice cracked, lifting his hand up to fist bump the mop-headed athlete. “Marty from my party!” Andi exclaimed, giving him a high-five while Jonah offered him a friendly smile and a ‘Sup!’Meanwhile, Cyrus finally met the eye he was avoiding when a sharp pain shot up his left shin, head snapping up to see Buffy staring at him like he sprouted a pair of antennas. As if he could sense their tension, Marty’s goofy smile wore thin, “I was supposed to meet you guys here, right?”“Yeah, dude! Took you long enough.” TJ quipped, albeit half-heartedly at the look of shire horror on his best friend’s face. He pulled Cyrus towards him, making enough room to let Marty to sit down, but before anyone else moved, Buffy shot up like a rocket. “Good Hair Crew Meeting. Now.” She said through gritted teeth, her face contorted into a slightly crazed smile. She gripped both Cyrus and Andi’s forearms, pulling them away from the table and towards the bathrooms. “But, Buffy--” “Now, Cyrus!” She hissed.“Should we be concerned?” Marty turned towards TJ and Jonah, who were sporting similar amused smiles on their faces, TJ’s wearing more on the worried side. The blonde boy sent his friend a silent prayer as he watched him get pulled away, hoping he could handle the matter. He knew that going after them would only make things worse. Still, the anxiety in his chest wouldn’t stop tugging. “Nah, it’s fine.” TJ whisked his hand, tearing his gaze away from the brown-haired boy and towards the two athletes, “So... did you guys hear that Metcalf got a motorcycle?” Marty sputtered into his water, causing the other two boys to cackle at his expense. “Wait, for real? I knew the guy was secretly a BAMF.”“First a tattoo sleeve and now a motorcycle. The man’s on a roll.” Jonah remarked, his smile slightly impressed. Marty and TJ looked at each other in awe, turning back towards the bright smiled boy enthusiastically, “Metcalf has tattoos?!” -*- In a path of flames, Buffy rounded the corner of the cashier’s desk, past the kitchen, and toward the Spoon’s bathrooms. She moved like a woman on a mission, dragging Cyrus with her by his wrist with a nonplussed Andi trailing behind them. Once they stopped in front of the pale mint door of the women’s restroom, Buffy released her grip, turning back to him with a dark, brooding expression, a storm in her eyes. Buffy met Marty earlier in the semester, both of them trying out for the boy’s basketball team and successfully making it after a hell week of tryouts. They were caught somewhere between athletic rivals and fast friends, their dynamic both interesting and confusing to the girl. He seemed to understand her in a way Andi and Cyrus couldn’t, sharing her love for competition and never judging when she, not in her opinion at least, took things too far. They got close when things started going south for her. As strong and independent as she prided herself on being, deep, deep down inside Buffy wished that Marty defended her when TJ and her hypermasculine moronic teammates kept making her basketball career a living hell. It was totally a guy thing, making subtle (and sometimes not so subtle) sexist jabs without even realizing how fucked up it was, and while Marty never explicitly dropped them, he would laugh along with the jerks on their team, blissfully unaware of how it chipped at the curly-haired girl’s heart when she was around to hear them. On a particularly bad day, before TJ and her reconciled and he was being more obnoxious than usual and refused to pass the ball, she snapped in front of the coach, in front of the girl’s dance team who were passing by to head to the locker rooms, going off on her teammates like a molten-hot volcano, burning them with her sharp words and turning their bullshit into ashes. After her rage passed, she expected a reprimand from Coach Rez for dropping a few unsavory curse words during her speech but was instead met with applause from the dance team, them hooting and hollering praise at her and a smug admiring smile her coach tried to suppress, ignoring her outburst completely and yelling at them to get back to their drills. The boys all wore matching gobsmack stares for the rest of the practice, their faces red and burning with shame, but hey, they started passing her a ball with no pushback and the comments stopped. After that day, her teammates thought twice about crossing her, except for Reed and his goons, but as far as she was concerned, they could stick it where the sun doesn’t shine. In regard to Marty, she noticed that their dynamic changed instantly to something unchartered, quickly aware that he began following her around with the same insufferable goofy smile, asking her to hang out with him after practice with his signature dopey charm and cracking jokes dumb enough to get her to laugh out of pity. She declined him every time with a different excuse and slowly felt herself distancing from their strange friendship, the image of Marty laughing at the jokes made at her and her fellow woman’s expense permanently engraved in head, hindering her from opening up her heart to him without her even realizing. Eventually, Marty took the hint and his advances stopped, but his kindness towards her remained unwavered, as well as the wistful looks he sent her in class when he thought she wasn’t looking. And Buffy was cool with it, she really was, even though the frequent rants she went on to Andi and Cyrus about how much of a mouth breather Marty was often raised their eyebrows in suspicion of her true feelings. She resented when they tried to imply something else was going on there, and she hated the fact that she couldn’t not talk about him, even if her words weren’t always sweet. It’s not like she missed him. That was absurd and outrageous of them to even suggest such a thing. She denied feeling anything towards him other than annoyance, even if she would go over their past banter in her head when she couldn’t sleep at night, thinking back to how soft and touchable and golden his hair looked in direct sunlight, or the way the upturn of his nose was slightly endearing, not that she would ever admit this outloud. So no, she didn’t miss him. What a ridiculous notion. “You better start explaining. I’m about ten seconds away from unleashing a can of whoopass on yours and Kippen’s dumb faces.” Cyrus made a squeak of terror, gulping roughly in his throat and tearing his eyes from Buffy’s fierce gaze and towards his other friend, whose patted his shoulder sympathetically, her feeble smile translating roughly to ‘you’re-so-screwed-it-was-nice-knowing-you’. He took a deep breath, failing at an attempt to ground himself long enough to collect his thoughts, “I want to start off by saying you have every right to be angry with me.” “You’re damn right I do!” Buffy interrupted, her nostrils flaring. Andi held up a hand to stop her, urging Cyrus to continue, which would be comical in another situation, since he was used to playing referee amongst friends.He licked his lips nervously, beginning again with caution, “I know I’ve been a sucky friend lately, neglecting you two, and I mean it when I say I’m sorry. I should’ve asked you first before inviting him here today, knowing your guys’ history and how you feel about him.”Buffy’s indignation subsided for a moment as a look of hurt and betrayal flickered across her face. Cyrus felt his heart clench in his chest, wishing he could wrap his arms around her. “Yeah, you really should’ve, Cy.” Buffy said sternly, but her eyes softened considerably. Cyrus felt a small sense of relief wash over him, her use of his nickname was definitely a good sign. She scoffed, looking up at the black and white photograph on the diner’s wall before meeting his frown again, “When did you guys get close enough for Spoon hangouts, anyway?” “He was part of the first thing TJ and I checked off of my ‘list-of-easy-things-I-can’t do’. He let us come over to check out his pet snake Nagini. I even held her!” “You held a snake named Nagini? That’s a sick name.” Andi said in disbelief, looking at her friend in slight awe. Cyrus felt a newly familiar bubble of pride in his chest as he processed the vaguely impressed look on Buffy’s face. “Right?! Did you know that’s what Voldemort’s snake is named? That makes it even cooler. TJ told me she’s a horcrux, whatever that is. Did you know he’s read the series like seven times--” Cyrus looked at the impatience growing on the curly headed girl’s face, pulling him out his nervous ramble before it spiraled out of control. He winced, “Sorry, not relevant to the issue at hand.” Buffy rolled her eyes, but it had little heat to it, “Why Marty, though? Ugh, Kippen’s bad enough. Sometimes I really regret pushing him to help you out with that list.”Cyrus flinched at her disdain towards his crush, “I know it takes a lot of my time. I can tell him I want to call it off if that’s what it’ll take for your forgiveness.” He looked down at the dry patches on his hands, feeling his heart drop at the idea of stopping the list. He felt like they were making real progress with it.Buffy smiled softly at him, feeling guilt pull in her heart at his downcast expression, “I don’t expect that from you, Cyrus. I know how much… the list means to you guys.” She gave him a knowing look, squeezing his upper arm affectionately. He smiled warmly at her, feeling more relief fall onto his shoulders at her touch. “Thanks for understanding, Buffy, really.” Cyrus said pulling her into a hug, which she returned a little more aggressively, squeezing him and earning a squeal from the boy. She released him with a chuckle, Andi laughing beside her, laying her head on her shoulder. “For what it’s worth, I think that list really is helping; you’re a lot better at confrontation now, Cyrus.” Andi added thoughtfully. Buffy hummed in agreement. “Speaking of confrontation…” Cyrus trailed off hesitantly, seeing Buffy’s sweet expression morph into exasperation. “What now?” She sighed, rubbing the bridge of her nose with her fingers. “I kinda… invited him to the Lagoon on Saturday… and Amber, too.” Cyrus confessed shakily, reluctantly meeting the two girls’ eyes. Andi perked up suddenly, while Buffy stared at him with displeasure. “Okay, Amber I understand. I think Jonah mentioned inviting her anyway. But Marty? You barely even know him!” Buffy grumbled, less angry and more exhausted than anything. “I know; I’m sorry! It’s just the poor guy wouldn’t stop talking about you, and I wasn’t thinking! I know he’s pretty good friends with Jonah and TJ, and I thought it would be cool to integrate our friend groups more.” He stumbled over his words in a lame explanation. “He talked about me?!” Buffy demanded, her tone growing more dubious with each word, “What did he say?” “All good things, I promise. After we played Mario-Kart at his house, his mom brought home pizza for lunch, and while we ate, TJ and him started talking basketball. I was starting to zone out until Marty mentioned you. He kept talking about how much of a great player you are, calling you the best one on the whole team.”The girl’s frown deepened, “You’re exaggerating.” “I’m really not! He even called you better than TJ, which TJ didn’t like very much.” Cyrus explained with wide eyes and a bemused smile. Buffy let out a pleased scoff, “Yeah, I’m sure he didn’t.” “Wow, I can’t believe after all this time Marty’s still in love with you,” Andi giggled, earning a shove from the other girl. “He is not! He’s just stating the obvious facts.” Buffy responded, crossing her arms over her chest. A knowing smile grew on Cyrus’ face, but he chose not to make a comment, instead thinking harder on the boys’ conversation. “He also mentioned being sorry about something, but he didn’t really go into it. TJ got oddly quiet during that part.” Buffy remained silent for a moment, seeming to hold a thought back, a conflicted look on her face. She sighed deeply, rolling her shoulders back and dropping them down. “Okay, whatever… I’ll humor him, for now. But if he so much as looks at me funny, I’m holding you personally responsible.” “Oh my god! You’re the best! Thank you, thank you, thank you!” Cyrus squealed in relief and delight, pressing a firm kiss on her bronze cheek. She made a face, swiping away his kiss with the back of her sleeve, but a fond smile settled on her face, “You’re so lucky I love you kid.” “I know.” He spoke softly, smiling gratefully. “Cyrus, I know we both can get wrapped up in our own lives sometimes, but we always want to know what’s going on in yours, no matter what. You got that?” Andi said, wrapping her arms around both of them. “I know that. You’re the best friends a guy could ask for.” He looked between the girls, admiration for the two of them filling his heart. The girls looked between each other, turning back to him with a cheeky grin, “Just another service we provide!” The three giggled together, their arms outstretched and tangled up in each others’ in a clumsy embrace. “I feel like I haven’t talked to you guys in forever. We need to video chat tonight or something,” Buffy said. “Oh, gosh, please! I’m supposed to spend the night at TJ’s tomorrow, and I need advice. I’m totally freaking!” Cyrus groaned, his confession causing heat to pool in his cheeks. Andi and Buffy exchanged excited looks. Andi raised an eyebrow suggestively before speaking,“Oh? A sleepover, you say?” Cyrus groaned, “Don’t even go there, Bambi.” “Oh my god, shut up, Underdog!” she giggled, smacking him lightly on his shoulder, which quickly escalated in a playful slapping fight. Buffy looked at them shaking her head, huffing in amusement. “Stop now, children. We should go back before they think I’ve murdered Cyrus, and Andi’s helping me hide the body.”“Wow, morbid.” Cyrus scoffed, feeling a buzz in the pocket of his jeans. He swiped up on his notifications, reading a new text. Teej ^-^: Hey, not trying to rush you guys or anything, but Amber came back with our food. Teej ^-^: Is everything okay? “I think TJ’s getting worried,” Cyrus giggled, pocketing his phone, “And, our food’s there.” “Go figure. Let’s head back before he pops a vein.” Buffy quipped, grabbing both of their hands and making to leave the hallway they had taken over. “We’ll finish this conversation tonight. I expect a full report from both of you.”“Yes, Ma’am!” Andi joked, saluting her as they walked into the bustling dining area. They walked in silence for a moment, wearing matching amused grins, until Buffy turned to the short-haired girl with a mocking smirk. “So, Bambi, huh?” Andi made a noise of surprise, walking ahead of them and looking over her shoulder, “How about those baby taters, huh? I’ve been craving them all week! Let’s go eat some!” -*- “I knew there was a reason I always liked you, Amber.” Cyrus grabbed her hand from across the table, feeling a strong sense of solidarity between them.“Please, Cyrus. Anyone with half a brain cell knows that Spirited Away is the best animated film on Earth.” Amber said matter-of-factly, taking her hair down from her ponytail now that her shift was over. “But you said Monsters Inc was your favorite animated movie!” Andi paused her milkshake sipping to look up at her with a pout. Amber smiled at her in remorse, patting her hand with her own, “Just because it’s my favorite doesn’t mean it’s the best, Bambi.”“Can we just drop this debate already? We already settled that Pixar is the best, and I’m getting bored.” Buffy huffed.“Never! It’s tied!” Cyrus exclaimed, popping a baby tater in his mouth, “Marty is the finishing vote.” TJ holds up his spoon, speaking into it like a WWE commentator. “In the right corner, we have Jonah, Amber, and Cyrus on team Ghibli! In the left, Buffy, Andi, and TJ on team Pixar! Which team will you choose, Martholomew?” “Fuck off, man! You know that’s not my name.” Marty rolled his eyes with a smile, throwing a fry at his face, who caught it in his mouth with ease. “Besides, I like each equally. That’s like asking me which ear I like more.” “The right, duh.” Amber and TJ said together, looking at each other with disgust. Buffy groaned playfully. “Dude just answer the question so we can drop this.” “Hmmm… Let me think.” Marty smirked at her, tapping his chin with his index finger. She rolled her eyes at him with a scoff. “Drumroll!” TJ announced into the spoon, prompting the rest of the table save Buffy to tap their hands on its wood. He held up the flatware up to Marty’s face, eyeing him in anticipation, “And the winner is…”“Fine. If you’re forcing me to choose, I guess it’d be… Pixar?” Cyrus groaned loudly, putting his head in his hands when Andi and Buffy started to cheer and happy dance in their seats. TJ bit down his smile of victory, rubbing the boy’s back to comfort him. “You can’t win them all, Underdog.” “Good to know you have taste, Green.” Buffy said smugly. “I’ve always had taste, Driscoll.” Marty shot back, equally as smug. “Oh, let’s put it to the test then, Frog Boy.” Buffy challenged, her eyes narrowing as she took a sip of her soda. Marty turned an impressive shade of red, falling silent for a moment before leaning back in his chair, crossing his arms defiantly, “Hit me with your best shot.” The whole table fell silent as she squinted at him, Cyrus and TJ exchanging a ‘oh crap’ look.“Marvel or DC?” “Marvel, is that even a question?” “Hey, Shazam! was awesome.” Jonah defended. “I meant as a whole, dipshit.” Buffy said dryly, turning her steely gaze back to her team member “Cats or Dogs?” “Dogs, duh.” “The only right answer!” “Of course you guys would be dog people.” TJ shook his head with a smile. Cyrus gasped from beside him, looking scandalized, “But puppies, TJ, puppies.”“You’re basically a puppy, Underdog.” TJ laughed, poking him in the thigh, earning an indignant swat of the hand and a giggle.“What does that even mean?” Andi asked, her eyebrows furrowed. Buffy rolled her eyes, “Ignore them. Okay, best decade of music?”“Uh… Either the 60s or like current shit. There is no inbetween.” Marty shrugged, dipping a fry in ketchup. “Hm, I can respect that.” Buffy nodded, raising her eyebrows. TJ shook his head with a look of utter scorn. “The 80s is rolling in its grave.” “Shut the hell up, Bon Jovi.” Amber snarked, interrupting her conversation with Andi on Saturday’s fashion choices. TJ huffed, turning pink when Cyrus giggled at his sister’s jab towards him, mercilessly tickling him in retaliation. After both boys calmed down and stopped laughing, Cyrus watched the seemingly rag-tag group of teenagers interact with each other in silence. It was nice, he thought, despite the fact that Buffy looked about ready to fling her burger Marty’s way as they went back and forth with their silly game. He laughed when Amber and Jonah began comparing finger nail beds, Andi reprimanding him on the ‘utmost importance of cuticle health’. The brown-haired boy felt content in the moment as he watched it all play out, only tearing his gaze away as he felt a shift in weight beside him. He turned back to TJ, who, to his surprise, had already been watching him with a look of quiet fascination. A deep blush crept up the blonde’s neck when he realized he’d been caught. Cyrus sent him a small coy smile, his own cheeks coloring pink as he leaned his body closer to the golden-skinned boy, whose face lit up like sunshine at the contact and wrapped a lazy arm around the other boy’s shoulders. “Okay, okay. Final question. What is the one movie that makes you cry everytime, no matter what?” Everyone looked at Marty expectantly. His face stayed blank as he answer. “None.” “What do you mean, none?”“I mean no movie has ever made me cry, Buffy.” “Marts, I think you might be a robot.” TJ said with a nervous laugh.“Or an alien.” Jonah added. “Or a sociopath.” Andi mumbled under her breath, causing Amber to snort aggressively into her hand. Buffy stared at him through a cocked gazed, scrutinizing him closely, “...You’re full of shit! I don’t believe that for one second.” “It’s the truth!” Marty exclaimed. Buffy scoffed, disbelief sewn into her features. “I bet your ass I could find a movie that’ll have you sobbing like a newborn baby.”“I’d like to see you try,” Marty smiled at her with his usual dopey grin. Buffy bit back a smile of her own. “Wanna make this a real thing?” Marty smirked with mischief. “I never back down from a bet.” “Good. Tomorrow, my house. Loser has to buy the winner all their snacks at the Lagoon on Saturday.” Buffy challenged, extending her arm across the table towards the boy, leaning over Cyrus and TJ in the process. Together they watched in amusement as the two athletes shook hands, sealing their bet. Cyrus raised his eyebrows at TJ, who in turn wiggled his own, earning a giggle from the boy. Cyrus then met Andi’s eye from across the booth, whose eyes darted between Buffy and Marty in suspicion, raising a questioning eyebrow at him. He simply shrugged, turning back to the heated conversation between the two athletes. “I hope you got a lot of cash.” Buffy laughed deviously. “Keep dreaming, Driscoll.”