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As their Host enters the study, Mr. Game & Watch shuts the door behind them. He immediately swivels to face Ike - who is standing and staring hard at the closed door - and sternly beeps at him to sit down.“Alright, alright! No need to tell me twice.” The blue-haired swordsman sits back down in the uncomfortable plastic chair. He sighs, and then a blanket of awkward silence falls over the hall.What a day. Something like this was bound to happen. It happens every year - at least, it’s happened every year since Ike arrived. Smash’s contestants have a history of getting a bit too rowdy outside of the arena and as one might expect, this always inevitably leads to property damage. Personally, Ike didn’t see this as a big deal once he learned how quickly Master Hand and his squadron could fix things. Architecture, weapons, heirlooms, even people’s bodies… he doesn’t know how, but the swordsman had personally seen all such things get fixed overnight. So that’s why Ike typically didn’t view the Smashers’ frequent skirmishes as something to worry about. Why would they be, when nothing is being lost or irreversibly damaged?But… for some reason he had been worried this time. He never had been with the property of the last two hosts - Tabuu never made any complaints about the Smashers’ behaviour and let them do whatever they wanted. The previous host was a different story, but they were clearly rich enough that even without Master Hand’s sorcery they should’ve had nothing to worry about when replacing and rebuilding things. Plus the way they carried themselves and treated other people… a guy like that is bound to get on anyone’s nerves…However, from the moment Ike laid eyes on this year’s host, he could tell this one was vastly different from the last two. They had this perpetual panicked look in their eyes, like they were scared of something going wrong at any moment. And yet… they somehow seemed to be getting along with the Bowsers. Even though he offered his help, they rejected it, and in that brief moment he saw something deeper in those eyes. A kind of confidence and determination.Ike glances at the seats beside him. Bowser sighs dramatically, bored, as he twiddles his thumbs. Junior sighs as well but then suddenly remembers something, reaching into his shell and pulling out a PS Vita with a snicker.After that encounter, Ike had run into Samus and Lucario in the halls, both of whom had interesting things to say about their host. “They’re funny,” Samus had said, cracking a smile. “The second I laid eyes on them I figured they’d just be a pushover - maybe fun to mess around with. But that changed when I saw them pick up a paintball gun and shoot DK and Diddy off the roof. None of our past hosts really wanted anything to do with us, so it’s cute to see them get involved in all our madness. But I have a feeling they don’t really have anything else to do, haha.”The previous hosts were not like that. They had multi-million dollar multiverse corporations to take care of.  “This world… is not like the others we’ve been to.” Lucario had looked particularly troubled while they were sharing their own findings. The aura Pokemon had arrived today as well, and yet had already noticed a number of oddities. “It’s as if… this world itself and our host… have a very special relationship. That’s what the aura is telling me.” Whether Lucario didn’t know the details or simply didn’t want to elaborate was beyond anyone’s knowledge. But with this new information, and seeing the ghastly look on their host’s face when they came to meet Master Hand in the study, Ike decided something. For the time being, he was going to help protect whatever it was about this place that the Host holds dear. He hasn’t known them for very long, but he feels confident that they’re not a bad person. Bowser sighs again, louder this time. Sitting across from him with his arms crossed, Ganondorf scoffs.“Quiet down, you blithering fool. I can barely hear myself think.”“OH YEAH?” Bowser growls, easily spurred on by his rival’s words. “What are you thinking about then??”The Gerudo man grins deviously. “My victory in the new tournament, of course.”“HA! GET REAL!” Bowser guffaws loudly - too loud, really. While he's sure Master Hand's office is soundproof, Ike’s imagines that anyone on the storey below could probably hear the Koopa King's voice. “You haven’t even come CLOSE to winning a tournament since Melee!”“Pah. It seems you forgot about Brawl.” Although his tone is still confident, Ganondorf’s expression looks annoyed. “I made it to the semi-finals in Singles.”“YEAH, then that wimpy little Greenie ROASTED you!”Bowser Jr. looks up from his game to beam devilishly at the Gerudo king. “You lost to LUIGI?! Heeheeheehee! That’s SO lame! That guy is soooo weak!”Ganondorf is silent for a moment, expression sour. He uncrosses his arms and leans forward a bit. “Boy, did your father ever tell you about how that ‘weakling’ carried him through the Melee Doubles tournament?”“WHAT?!” Bowser stops laughing, panicking when his son looks up at him in disbelief. “N-No! I’ve told you the story, right?? It was the other way around!!”“That’s not how I remember it.” Ganondorf is grinning now. “I happened to see most of your fights. In each one he was averaging five kills in a three-stock match. You, on the other hand, had trouble even getting one… In fact, you often got in his way and sent him to his demise.”Bowser snarls and leaps from his seat. Mr. Game & Watch beeps angrily and waves his flag. The Koopa King huffs as he sits back down. “...The finals of that tournament,” Snake says, finally speaking after being silent for so long, “you were in them too, weren’t you, Ganondorf? Paired with Donkey Kong.”“That I was. I see you’re as knowledgeable as always.”Snake grunts in acknowledgement. After listening to all of this, Ike can’t help but smile, amused.“So you’re saying… you were beaten by Luigi two years in a row.” That wipes the grin off his face. Bowser chuckles, appeased.“Yeah, he was! How about instead of talking about your ONE tournament win all the time, you talk about THAT more often! If it happened twice then that means it’s more important than something that happened once, right? Bwhahaha!” The big turtle man scratches his nose, smug. “The only reason I don’t brag about how AWESOME I was in Melee Doubles is because I’d rather focus on TODAY than something that happened fifteen years ago!! Who CARES how I did back then - I’m gonna be better than ever in Ultimate!!!”“You said it, dad!” Junior cheers.“We’ll see about that,” Ganondorf grumbles, crossing his arms again and leaning back in the chair. “You won’t be so tough when you drop in the tournament with a penalty.”Practically choking from the laughter, Bowser’s jaw drops. “WHAT? Me, get the penalty?? That’s RICH! Why would I be getting one when everything was YOUR fault?” “Everything, you say? You’re saying I’m the one who burned the hall until it was charred black?”“W-Well! I’m not the one who sliced that huge painting in half!”“I wasn’t either.”Both Bowser and Ganondorf look at Ike. The blue-haired swordsman glances back and forth between them before exhaling softly.“I’m ready to accept whatever punishment comes my way.”“Hmph. How graceful of you. If only certain others had that same amount of grace when confronted with their loss.”“I’M GETTING REAL SICK OF YOU!” Bowser roars, getting out of his seat again. Mr. Game & Watch tries to tell him to sit down, but the Koopa King stomps angrily and drowns out his beeping. “Loss this, win that, none of that matters when the host was THERE and KNOWS you were the one who started the fight!!!”A simple grin and chuckle combination is the response. “Was I now?”“Err… yeah! Yeah, you definitely were!!” It’s clear that Bowser doesn’t actually remember.“This is pointless,” Snake sighs. “It doesn’t matter who started it or who did the most damage. What matters is how spiteful our host is feeling. If seeing their mansion damaged like that made them cry, then…”He says nothing further, the implications clear. Regardless of who did the most damage, they'll all get penalties if the Host is completely overcome with grief. The hall is silent. Bowser starts to look a little awkward - perhaps he... feels bad about what happened? Mr. Game & Watch politely asks Bowser to sit down. Before he can however, his son jumps and stands on his chair, pointing at Snake.“Waaaait a minute! Wasn’t it YOU who blew everything up and made the biggest mess of all??”Snake remains perfectly calm, grunting in response. “Yeah. Yeah I was.”Bowser ponders this for a moment and then… realization lights up his face, quickly shifting to anger. “SO THEN IT’S YOUR FAULT THAT WE’RE ALL GETTING A PENALTY!!!”“What are you-- grrrk!” With a roar, Bowser lunges at Snake and starts throttling him. Junior jumps in, angry as well, and the three of them begin to brawl. Toon Link snaps awake from the noise and looks around wildly, spotting the fight and eagerly jumping in without a second thought. Mr. Game & Watch frantically joins, trying futilely to split the four up. Ganondorf remains in his seat, laughing maniacally as he spectates. Ike watches from the sidelines, both in disbelief and also… not surprised at all.Heh. He’s glad to be back at Smash.Suddenly, the door to the study slams open, startling everyone into freezing the fight for a brief moment. 
“THIS HOUSE IS NOT FOR SALE!!”
Crazy Hand emerges from the study with a war cry, grabbing the nearest chair and lunging for the gaggle of Smashers. Everyone tries to split up to avoid him, but the hallway is too narrow! Crazy smacks everyone with the chair - including Ike and Ganondorf, the latter of whom falls from his seat and onto the ground in shock - and while everyone is stunned, he uses all the chairs to construct a cage around all seven Smashers in the hall. Ike is pretty sure this is somehow more chairs than were actually in the hall. Where did the extra ones come from?!Mr. Game & Watch beeps angrily and shakes his flat little fist at the prison bars. Why is he in here too?!“I’ve vowed to protect the Host from the world’s greatest evils!” Crazy announces, doing a saluting motion. “You will remain here in JAIL as penance for your crimes against humanity! Ha hoo hah!”Crazy Hand starts patrolling the hall, leaving the seven Smashers cramped together in the makeshift cage. No matter how much they all combine their strength, the chairs don’t budge. Escape is futile.Toon Link falls asleep again.Snake sighs and reaches into his pocket to pull out a new cigarette and lights it. “Now we’re in an even worse situation, thanks to you guys.”Simultaneously Bowser, Junior, Ganondorf, and Mr. Game & Watch yell at the special agent:“THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!!!” “It’s your fault!” “This is all YOUR fault.” “Beep beep beep!” “I agree with them actually,” Ike says to Snake. “Everything is your fault. Seriously, using explosives indoors? What were you thinking?”Snake hums in thought and calmly takes a drag from his cigarette. He says nothing while the others in the cage begin to bicker again. Crazy Hand comes over to yell at them to be quiet.Everyone is still trapped when the Host finally emerges from the study. They take one, long baffled look at the situation before laughing to the point of tears.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

"Welcome to-a Smash Brothers, Richter!" Mario says as he shakes hands with the newcomer. Several other Smashers on the plane echo the plumber's words, which causes the young Belmont to grin in response."Thanks everybody. This isn't my first fighting tournament, but it uh, is my first one so far from home so... I look forward to facing you all on the battlefield!"Everybody hollers in agreement, as if the mention of their favourite bloodsport awakened primal feelings within. Someone throws an inflated beach ball across the seats, clearly too eager to wait until they actually reach the beach itself. Richter chuckles to himself as he finds an empty seat among the rows of chairs. The chance to encounter fighters across the multiverse had just been too good to pass up, so the vampire hunter had accepted the mysterious invitation without hesitation. Upon arrival, he had bumped into the owner of the lovely (even under renovations) mansion, who showed him to where he could choose a room, and during that time they also alerted him to the beach trip that several of their ilk were to be partaking in. What a fantastic opportunity to interact with and learn more about his future opponents! He couldn't possibly pass it up. As Richter eavesdrops on nearby conversations while waiting for takeoff, someone taps him on the shoulder. The man turns around to see a blue robot boy sitting in the seat behind him, staring at the man with large eyes."Is there something I can help you with?" Richter asks. Megaman hesitates, then leans forward to talk."You're a Belmont? Like... Simon Belmont?""Why yes, Simon is one of my ancestors!" Richter pauses, letting the full weight of what the boy asked sink in. "Wait, you know Simon Belmont?""WHOA! Look at all the people!" Daisy exclaims as soon as she gets on the plane. Looks like her big beach trip idea is a hit! With a smile, she rushes over to Peach, who saved her a seat in the front row."It looks like most of the mansion showed up," Zelda says from the next seat over. The Smashers around them are chattering excitedly about various subjects, though the girls at the front pay none of them any mind for now. "And I'm sure we'll get a few more people before we take off. I'd look into getting a bigger plane for next season, Peach."Peach giggles at the sentiment, waving it off as she addresses Daisy, who is dropping her beach bag on the seat. "Have you seen our host recently? ...They are coming with us, right?""Of course! I made sure of that!" Daisy beams with pride, knowing her persuasion tactics are unparalleled. She glances across the seats quickly. "So they haven't boarded yet? Well, guess that means I'll just have to go track them down! They PROMISED they were going to come with us this time, and I've already planned out our entire day!!""Geez, what's with you and the host?" Samus chuckles from her window seat. She had been chatting with female Wii Fit Trainer in the row behind her. The other WFT is a row behind that, recruiting a few Smashers into a beach jogging-group. "What, are you in love with them or something?"Samus wiggles her eyebrows at the Sarasaland princess while Zelda lets out a snort such a direct question. Unexpectedly, Daisy adopts a thoughtful pose, thinking about the answer before replying."...Not yet! I just think they're super cool." She grins. "Now if you asked me if I'd go on a date with them anyways... then the answer is a big HECK YES!"Lady Robin lets out a teasing "oooooh" from the next row. As the audience in the front two rows giggle and chuckle amongst themselves, Captain Falcon leaps to his feet in the back row, having heard everything."HEY!" The F-Zero racer gives Daisy a thumbs up. "So would I!"Several Smashers across the plane start laughing. There are only a couple audible grunts and groans at the mention of this nonsense these two are spouting. For any confused Smashers - mostly the more recent arrivals - their seatmates turn to them and explain everything. It has only been six days, but it is already widespread knowledge that some people hold more fondness for their host than most do. Turns out not even the people of Smash are immune to spreading gossip about their friends.Daisy responds with a wry smile, placing her hands on her hips. "Oh yeah? That's cool, but you should totally know that the host and I are going on a super fun and super private beach date today!!""WHAT?!"This outburst comes from not one, but three different people. Once is Captain Falcon of course, who is slack-jawed at the declaration. Another is Marth, who averts his eyes in embarrassment as soon as he realizes his outburst. Thankfully, only the people closest to him seemed to notice it, because his voice was drowned out by Bowser's outburst, who even leaps from his seat in shock. When he realizes the many pairs of eyes on him (including the narrowing gaze of Daisy), he coughs and sits back down. There were a few other gasps around the room, but they slipped under the notice of the people around them due to the louder folks. The simultaneous outburst causes the plane chatter to go quiet, there even being a brief moment of silence before whispers rise to break it."Wait, are you serious?" Zelda asks excitedly, standing from her seat and talking over the whispers. "You asked them on a date and they said yes?"Daisy looks somewhat sheepish for once, holding a smile as she averts her gaze and speaks in a quieter tone than usual. "W-Well, the other day when I told them they had to come with us, I was like 'it's a date!' and they said 'okay!', so like... hahaha...""That's not a date, you dummy!" Robin laughs, also standing from all the excitement. Nearby, Marth lets out a sigh of relief. "You know that's just a figure of speech. Nobody would think you're going on a date when you say that!""I know!" Daisy pouts and crosses her arms over her chest. "But that's not going to stop me from hanging out with them aaaall day today like it is a date! So, ha!"As Robin shakes her head in disbelief, Captain Falcon starts chuckling to himself. "That's a great plan you have there, Princess Daisy! But there's one flaw in it..." Falcon dramatically jabs a thumb towards himself. "...and that is the fact that I will be the one hanging out with the cute host all day at the beach!"Daisy furrows her brow in a grimace. "What! You can't just say that after I've already called dibs!""But I just did!""And I just said you can't do that!!""WILL YOU TWO SHUT UP ALREADY?!" Bowser roars, suddenly grumpier than he was before. On the other side of the plane, Ganondorf nods."For once, I agree with the overgrown buffoon. You're all foolish for being fixated on such a pathetic weakling... and that fixation will one day prove to be your downfall.""WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN??" Bowser yells once again, clearly further set off by the sound of the Gerudo man's voice. Daisy stares at the King of Evil with a questioning look."Yeeeaah, I don't really get what you're saying either." Ganondorf simply chuckles without elaborating, prompting Daisy to deadpan."I think you'll find that I have no weaknesses!" Captain Falcon announces confidently, further convoluting this conversation because it is only mildly relevant to what Ganondorf said. But he manages to bring it back around when he points at Daisy dramatically for his next declaration. "But enough about how great I am! If we cannot settle this with words, then we must do it the Smash way... through battle!! The winner gets to go on a day-long beach date with the cute host!!""Oh, you're on!" With a fire in her eyes, Daisy begins to step away in preparation for battle... but Peach's calm hand on her arm stops her in her tracks."Couldn't you decide in some other way?"Daisy grins and waves off her friend's hand. "Don't worry Peachy; we'll go outside! We're not going to wreck your plane.""No, silly! That's not what I'm worried about. Even if you win the fight, who's to say you'll have enough energy for your 'date'? We didn't bring any strong restoratives, and the host might not be too happy if you two spend too much time eating and not enough time doing fun stuff!""I can NEVER run out of energy!" Captain Falcon claims, but Daisy actually takes Peach's words into consideration."You have a point..." The Sarasaland princess isn't oblivious - their host clearly has something against leaving home. Who knows when they'll agree to leave their realm next? And who knows when that time will involve a PRIME DATE LOCATION like the beach?? She wasn't lying when she told everyone she wasn't "in love" yet, but she does want the two of you - especially the host! - to have fun. Peach smiles and stands from her seat before turning to look across the plane. "Now, what's a fair and safe game we could play to settle this little competition...? Does anyone have any ideas?"She raises her voice to address the plane's occupants to gather suggestions. Just about everybody seems to be at a loss - what could they play quickly and safely that wouldn't offer any unfair advantages to anyone? Does such a game even exist? Just as it seems this idea is going to go nowhere, Villager scoots out of their seat and walks over to Peach. She leans down curiously to watch as they pull something from their pocket and then places it in Peach's hand."This is...?" Peach tilts her head curiously at the... device? in her hand. A few other Smashers leave their seats to look as well. The "device" seems to be in three parts: one is a spinning top, another is a rectangular piece with a spinny thing on it, and the last is a plastic toothed cord. Villager takes back the toy and then demonstrates how to use it: the top goes onto this spinny piece, then the cord goes into this hole, and then...When Villager yanks the cord back out, the top falls from the rectangle piece and is spinning along the plane floor powerfully. It is similar to one of R.O.B.'s gyro's except designed for anyone to easily utilize! All the Smashers on the plane - especially the kids - are in awe of this contraption. As people stare at the top that clearly has no intention of slowing down, Villager pulls another top out of their pocket and goes through the same motions. There are now two tops spinning around on the ground.The purpose of this game becomes clear when the two tops collide."I see!" Marth exclaims as the two tops keep hitting each other. One is visibly slowing down. "The purpose of this game is for your top to be the last one spinning, correct?"Villager nods, and then pulls a large plastic arena out of their pocket. This will be what the tops duke it out in, with its concave shape drawing them towards each other to prevent a stalemate. With a grin, Daisy leans down and grabs the orange top just before it can stop spinning."Yeah, this game should work PERFECTLY!" She points the top at her opponent in a challenging manner. "So? Ready to get your butt kicked?"With a cocky grin, Captain Falcon snatches the other spinning top, which is a red one. "Heh! Bring it on, princess!""Hey Villager, got any more of those things?" Zelda asks, which prompts Daisy to make a noise of disbelief. "What? Can't let you hog all the fun.""Oh yeah, you're going to have to work to earn this victory," Samus adds, getting up from her seat as Villager one by one pulls twenty seven more tops of varying colours out of their pocket. Zelda grabs a violet one while Samus grabs one that is cyan. Peach also takes the opportunity to grab a pink one for herself. Daisy pouts in response."Peachyyyy!""Aw, don't be like that!" Peach giggles at her friend's continued displeasure. "This just looks like fun!""Spinny thingy tournament!!" Robin announces as she hops over the seats to grab a dark purple top and a navy blue top. "Whoever wins gets to spend the whole day with the host! Here Lucy - catch!" Robin tosses the navy blue top to her daughter, who is caught off guard by the action and nearly drops it. "Wh-Why am I playing??""To make things more interesting, of course!""Uh oh," Fox chuckles, looking between mother and daughter knowingly. Beside him, Falco is shaking his head and muttering about how dumb all this is. Next to approach the pile is Marth, who grabs a blue top with more trepidation than the others had."W-Well! I suppose I may as well participate... to make things more interesting, of course." Daisy hums out a stern "mmm-hmm" as she gives the prince a deadpan. His real intentions are obvious. She knows about the gift that he bought for the host the other day! Before anyone can comment further, Marth is shoved aside by none other than Bowser."Move it, loser! No one's having a competition on my watch without including ME!" With a laugh, the Koopa King snatches a yellow top and a lime green one, handing the latter to his son. "Junior and I will crush you all!"As all this has been happening, some other Smashers have been sneaking in to grab from the pile of spinning tops. Ness, Lucas, Red, Leaf, DK, Diddy, Pichu, Pacman, Olimar, Pikachu, Yoshi, Toon Link, the Ice Climbers, Megaman, Richter, the Duck Hunt duo, both Inklings, and R.O.B. have made their way to the back of the plane to hold and spectate their own competition, claiming about half of the total tops as a result. This leaves five left.Bowser Jr. looks between the two groups. The other one has already gotten started, and Junior KNOWS how much adults like to blab before getting started with anything fun. "Hey, wait for me!" With the top his dad gave him, Junior rushes to the back of the plane while giggling with excitement. Bowser's jaw drops at this betrayal."J-Junior! Aren't you going to support your old man?!""Nah!"This is absolutely shocking and unprecedented. Everyone is so distracted by this amusing scene that no one notices the new competitor until he already has the green top in his hands. Daisy balks when she spots him, having been one of the last people she expected to join in."L-Link?! Not you too!!"Link smiles sheepishly and shrugs. He is shoved aside by Ganondorf, who grabs a black top with a wicked grin."I will be the one to claim victory in this silly little game.""If it's so silly, then why are you playing?" Samus asks wryly. "Yeah!" Daisy agrees. "This doesn't concern you, so don't butt in!""Yeah!!" Bowser roars. "Scram!"Ganondorf chuckles calmly at everyone's opposition. "Don't misunderstand. I have no interest in the foolish 'prize' of the host's attention that you all are vying for. I simply wish to demonstrate just how much better I am than all of you." The atmosphere grows more tense. Even those who are neutral or lukewarm about the realm's landowner feel uneasy about the idea of Ganondorf winning, especially knowing that he's one of the people responsible for the damages to the mansion. (Not that many people were fond of him before that.) In response, Fox hops over the chairs to join the group, leaving Falco to squawk in disbelief."Fox?! Seriously??""Hey, don't get me wrong. Our host this year is pretty cool, but that's not why I'm joining in on the fun." The Star Fox pilot grabs a brown top and starts tossing it up and down. "A chance to knock this creep down a peg before the tourney even starts? How could I turn down an opportunity like that??"Ganondorf merely chuckles at the challenge. Peach picks up the last two tops - a white one and a dark red one - and holds them up. "We may as well add a couple more! Who wants to join~?""Ooh, may I give it a try?!" Male Wii Fit Trainer bounces up from his seat. "This game looks like fun!"Peach nods and smiles as mWFT excitedly approaches to take the white top. "Anyone else?" There is no response. It seems everyone who wants to play is already playing. Unsatisfied, Peach looks around the plane to see who's left to join.Luigi is in his seat near the back of the plane, keeping to himself with his head in a book. (He is actually eavesdropping and is heavily invested in the results of the competition. B-But for no particular reason, of course!)Greninja is also sitting at the back of the plane. They seem to be paying attention to the spinning top game back there. (They are actually listening to the voice in the cardboard box behind the seat dictating orders. There is some scheming going on here.)Jigglypuff is located in a window seat, paying absolutely no attention to the commotion around them as they scroll through the Internet on their tablet. (They are busy on the "Official Cloud Strife Fan Forum". Some unruly trolls are doing their rounds again, and as a well-respected moderator it is their job to keep things in order!)Mario is gathered at the front with them, but he has already decided to be referee. (He is currently zoned out and thinking about delicious food and relaxing on the beach. Sigh... he needs more vacations...)Peach's eyes land on Villager, who immediately shakes their head at the unspoken question. They want to see everyone else having fun! They can play with these tops anytime. So. That leaves..."Shulk! Why don't you join?" With a dazzling smile, Peach holds out the dark red top to the blond boy, who had been silently watching proceedings with an interest in the mechanics of the game. Shulk stammers at the sudden attention, glancing around nervously. Is there really not anyone else?"N-No, that's quite alright. I'm not really interested--""Join us!" Peach insists somewhat aggressively, shoving the top in Shulk's face. He leans back a bit, but there is nowhere to go on this cramped plane, so he has no choice but to relent and accept the duty that has been thrust upon him. Peach smiles sweetly when he finally gives in. "Hooray! This will be so exciting!""Uh oh, is Peach playing her shipping games again?" Zelda chuckles, speaking in a softer tone so only those in the immediate vicinity can hear her. Samus starts snickering while Daisy lets out a mock-hurt gasp."Peachy! You traitor!""I cannot believe you would use this fun little game to further your own romance agenda," Robin adds, which earns her a knowing smile from the princess in question."Oh, like you're one to talk!" Robin lets out the same gasp that Daisy did. Behind her, Lucina watches the conversation obliviously, not following what her mother and the others are suddenly getting offended about."Pfft, whatever!" The tactician announces with a hint of unapologetic laughter to her voice. "Let's just play already! Me and you Peachy, let's go.""Hold on now," Fox says before the ladies can prepare themselves to start the match. "Robin, you can't set up the bracket. You'll throw your personal biases in the mix. We need to give that job to someone who isn't playing.""I have an idea!" Peach announces, then turns to call out in the direction of the cockpit. "Toad! Can you come here for a moment?"Within seconds, Toad rushes out of the pilot's room. "You needed something, Princess Peach?"The princess nods. "We need to make..." She pauses to count the combatants. "...seven pairs. Might you have something that can help us out?""Of course!" Toad reaches into his jacket and pulls out a handful of straws. "Whoever pulls the same sized straw as someone else is paired with them!""My, that's convenient!" Falco remarks, voice oozing with sarcasm. "Am I the only one who thinks it's weird that he had something like that?" Absolutely nobody pays attention to him. The fourteen competing Smashers each grab a straw from Toad's hand and after comparing lengths, the matches end up as follows:
Zelda VS Fox
Marth VS Bowser
Ganondorf VS Peach
Robin VS Shulk
Link VS Lucina
Daisy VS Samus
Captain Falcon VS Wii Fit Trainer
As the others offer up fighting words to their opponents, Daisy stares intently at the straw she drew. Of course, she's going to win no matter what! But...
BUT...
"Girls!" Daisy calls out in a serious tone, attracting the attention of the others. "Strategy meeting! Over here!" "Strategy meeting?" Samus chuckles. "But... this isn't a team-based game.""Just get over here!!"Confused, the five other girls participating join Daisy off to the side, huddling in a circle. Daisy slings her arms around the two on either side of her - Peach and Samus - and leans in to speak in a hushed voice."...I would like to form an alliance.""Oh? An alliance?" Samus asks with an amused grin. "What happened to that confidence from earlier?" Robin teases. Peach and Zelda wear amused expressions as well, while Lucina still looks confused."It's still here and I still plan to whoop everyone's BUTT and win this thing! Buuuut..."Daisy pauses to look over her shoulder at the others. Link, Marth, and Fox are having a free-for-all round as practice. Ganondorf, Captain Falcon, and male Wii Fit Trainer are practicing their launching techniques. Falcon in particular seems rather obsessed with grabbing the top while its still spinning aggressively to prove how COOL he is. Bowser is struggling to fit his claws into the O-shaped ring at the end of the cord, so he gets Villager to give him a different shaped one. Shulk is the only outlier, choosing not to practice but to instead take this time to pull apart the top and analyze it. When Daisy looks back at her friends, her expression is dead serious."We CAN'T let any of those guys win! The host will have such a lame time if they have to hang out with any of them all day. And I don't think I need to mention I don't trust Ganondork or King Lame-o whatsoever."They don't even need to discuss it: everybody instantly agrees."Sooo..." Robin begins, asking what they are all thinking: "How are we doing this alliance thing?""If any of us win, let's share." Daisy grins deviously as she explains: "Instead of just one of us hanging out with the host for the whole day, we can all hang out with them at different times. Together, we're going to give them the best day EVER. Then they'll want to go places with us all the time!""Aww, what a lovely idea!" Peach agrees. "With all of us together, we'll be able to keep anyone else from ruining their day!""EXACTLY!" Daisy exclaims, nodding vigorously. "B-But..." Everyone looks at Lucina. "...what if one of the others win instead?"The group is silent for a moment. Finally, Robin offers a solution with a smile:"Sabotage.""Aaand, now I'm in," Samus says. "I think we're all in agreement then," Zelda nods. Lucina remains the only one who isn't completely sure about participating in this plan (not that she was keen on participating in the tournament in the first place), but upon seeing everyone's excited grins, she merely sighs and decides to go along with their scheme anyways. Assumedly, she didn't have much of a choice in the matter anyways. Finally, Daisy breaks their circle by standing up straight and whirling around to face the boys."ALRIGHT! We're ready!!" With a snicker, Daisy leads the girls back to the little plastic arena. The boys cease their practicing and other shenanigans so the first round may begin.ROUND 1
ZELDA VS FOX"Hold on," Zelda says once she's in position. She looks at Villager. "Are there any tricks we should know that'll help us?""Oh yeah," Fox chuckles. "We don't even know if this game is just luck or not."Villager thinks to themselves for a moment before an idea comes to them. They take a deep breath and then... make a mighty silent scream!! Everyone is understandably puzzled."Are you saying that yelling is supposed to help you win?" Peach asks. Villager nods."There is no way that's true," Falco says from the peanut gallery. Villager simply nods again. Overhearing this tidbit of information, the group at the back of the plane looks up from their three way match."Yelling helps?" Leaf muses. "Well, if you say so!" With a deep breath, she lets out a loud, continuous scream that startles some of the people around her. Her opponents - Ness and Toon Link - shrug and decide to join in."AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA""AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"
"HYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
Two of the tops lose steam and gradually come to a stop. Toon Link hollers in triumph when his is the last one standing. Everyone is flabbergasted at these results."The-a yelling worked...?" Mario says. Falco looks shaken for a moment, but quickly regains himself."Th-That was just a coincidence! There was a one in three chance he was going to win, there's no way the yelling had anything to--""Alright Fox, get ready to lose!" Zelda gets back into position, a new determination in her eyes. Unfazed, Fox mimics the pre-battle stance."Bring it on, princess!"Mario squats down so he can get a closer view of the arena. He has to be PREPARED to make any referee-like calls as soon as the need arises! He begins the countdown."A-Three... a-two... a-one... and-a GO!!!"Both challengers rip the cord out of the rectangular launcher, dropping both tops into the arena. Violet and brown blurs spin around each other, making a horrible sound against the plastic. Nobody cares about that though, because the sound is quickly drowned out by endless yelling."YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA""HYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"The tops clash against each other, powered up by the screams of their borrowed owners! Plastic and metal clash across the arena, each top suffering a loss of speed on each hit. Neither combatant lets up their screaming even after a solid ten seconds. Zelda's voice starts getting higher, which sounds like she's reaching her limit... and there is suddenly a whole new force behind her screams!! The violet top absorbs her energy and assaults its opponent relentlessly, finally wearing it down and bringing the brown top to a complete stop."AAAAAAAAAA I WON!" Zelda screeches triumphantly, laughing to herself amidst the lightheadedness. She fearlessly grabs the violet top even though it's still spinning, adrenaline making her immune to the quick sharp pain it brings her. "Hyrule repreSENT!! Who's next?!""I think you should sit down, Zel," Samus says with a chuckle, guiding her to an empty seat. Fox sighs as he grabs the brown top."Didn't think I'd get knocked out so early... oh well. Hey kids, you want another one?" He heads to the back of the plane to hand off the brown top to someone else before returning to his seat. He's pretty interested in how this tournament will turn out."This might just be the dumbest game we've ever played," Falco muses. Robin lifts a brow at him."Oh yeah? Is that why you're oh-so-eager to watch?"The blue pilot looks down at himself. He is indeed standing and leaning like halfway across the row in front to get a better look. With an unintelligible grumble, he slowly sits back down."Alright!" Peach claps her hands together eagerly. "Who's next?"
MARTH VS BOWSER
Bowser chuckles darkly as he fits his claws around the arrowhead-like grip of the cord. "May as well give up now, princey, 'cuz Bowser's going all the way to the top!""We'll see about that," Marth replies with a serious expression. If nothing else, he's determined to prevent this brute from going further in the tournament. And... winning would be nice, of course..."Let'sa have a clean fight, boys!" Mario says as he squats into position again. Then, he begins the countdown.
Three...

Two...

One...
Aaaaand they're off! The blue and yellow tops drop into the arena, quickly beginning to spin around each other. Without hesitation, Marth starts the powerup sequence."HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA...!"Unfazed, Bowser guffaws at the boy's attempt. "You've gotta do better than that, princey! Here, let me show you how it's DONE."The Koopa King takes a deep breath and then proceeds to let out a roar so loud and so powerful that it shakes the entire plane. The arena shudders, causing the tops to bounce and go haywire! The yellow top manages to get a good hit on the blue one during this, and cleanly knocks it out of the arena. It stops spinning almost as soon as it hits the ground."A-And... Bowser-a wins!""N-No!" Marth stares at the defeated top in dismay. Unnoticed due to being so far away, Luigi is peering over his book with horror at these results. Bowser laughs loudly as his top continues to spin powerfully in the ring."Oh yeah!! That's what you get when you mess with the best!""Daaaad!" Bowser Jr. leans out of the crowd of Smashers at the back to address his father. "Keep it down, would'ja?! You knocked me out of the ring!!""Oops. Sorry son..."
GANONDORF VS PEACH
"Like this~?" Peach asks, pulling out the cord in a tentative manner. The pink top drops and starts rotating with a weak spin."Yeah, you got it!" Fox replies with a thumbs up. "Just do that with all your might!""Okay, I think I understand. Thank you!" With a cheery hum, Peach retrieves the top before it comes to a complete stop and sets up the device again. On the other side of the arena, Ganondorf lets out a dark chuckle."This will be too easy," the Gerudo man remarks. Peach is completely unfazed by his taunt, the smile remaining on her face. Zelda takes up the mantle of offering a response."Careful Ganondorf, I think your head might be growing.""KICK HIS BUTT, PEACHY!" "I'll do my best!" Peach exclaims in a sing-song voice to her friends. Once both competitors confirm they are ready, Mario begins the countdown.
Three...

Two...

One...

GO!!!
Ganondorf grunts as he yanks the cord from the launcher with all his strength. On the other side of the arena, Peach does a twirl before launching the pink top. While the black top does narrow ovals up and down the arena, the pink one does circles around the edge. "Pah!" Ganondorf grins as the pink spinning top gets bonked further from the middle as it passes by. "Like I said: easy.""This could be dangerous for Peach," Fox says to no one in particular, just as engrossed in the game as everyone else. "All it would take is one good hit and she'll be knocked out of the arena.""C'mooon, Peachy!" Daisy pleads, eyes fixated on the two tops. Ganondorf is silently smirking down at the arena, prompting Shulk (after some hesitation) to ask: "You're not going to shout to um, power it up...?""That would be a waste of energy," he replies, confidence unwavering. "The winner has already been decided--"Ganondorf is cut off by the sound of Peach's voice. Instead of shouting, it seems the Mushroom Kingdom princess is singing to give power to the top!! Her sweet humming seems to have no effect at first, but then..."N... No! That's impossible!"Ganondorf is left slack-jawed when the black top gradually ceases its oval pattern and rests in the dead center of the arena. The pink top's spirals slowly close in... and then they collide! The rebound sends the pink top backwards, but it keeps its spiral momentum and continues to move in and out and around, much like the outline of a flower."Yes! YES!" Daisy cheers as Peach continues her song. "This is the power of our alliance! You're going DOWN, Ganondork!"Clenching his teeth together, the Gerudo man watches this onslaught in disbelief. His breathing grows heavy and rapid with his anger, until finally..."UUUWWWHAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHH! I! WILL! NOT! LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSE!!!"He punches the ground in frustration, and the hit is so mighty that it makes the black top jump just before the pink one can hit it again, and then quickly land... on top of its opponent!! The downward force causes the pink top to ricochet outwards and it quickly spins out when it is unable to land properly. The winning top - affected by this stunt as well - spins out seconds afterwards.Everyone watching the match is silent. The only noise is the cheers and screams from the other side of the plane that are for a completely different tournament."G... Ganondorf-a wins?!" "N-No way..." Lucina gasps, stunned like everyone else in the room. The winner, still breathing heavily, gradually begins to laugh."Ha ha ha... E-Easy..."After the shock subsides, Peach lowers her hands from her face and pouts, letting out a small sigh of disappointment as she retrieves the pink top. "Aww, I'm sorry everybody...""You tried your best," Robin says, offering a reassuring smile. Zelda waves Peach over to sit with her, which she does."Don't worry, there's still the rest of us. We're gonna win no matter what."Peach smiles back, confident in her friends' ability to carry on. From a few seats over, Marth furrows his brow."Hold on, did you all... form a team together?"Daisy reaches over and ruffles the swordsman's hair. "Shush! You already lost so it’s nothing you should be worrying about."
ROBIN VS SHULK
"HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH..."Shulk spends more time uneasily watching Robin than watching the battle itself. She's yelling with such determination that it feels like he's going to get attacked by a blast of magic or something..."Shulk?" He looks over to see Peach giving him an unreadable smile. "Why aren't you yelling too?""Well, like I said earlier, I'm not really interested in winning..."The princess sternly shakes her head. "You should still try your best!""I-I don't know if it'll make much of a difference...""Just do iiiit," Zelda laughs. Captain Falcon nods in agreement and clenches his fist dramatically."C'mon, kid! Unleash your FULL POWER!""Uh...""You can do it, Shulk!" Lucina cheers. Beside her, Link offers a smile and a thumbs up. Marth just shrugs, as if saying "hey, what do you have to lose?"."LUCY??" Robin gasps, putting a hand to her chest in mock-hurt. "You're not cheering for ME?!"Lucina smiles apologetically. From his seat, Falco gets up and squawks angrily: "Now's your chance, kid! Power up and get ahead!!""I-I, uh...""Just DO IT, you nerd!" Daisy exclaims in close enough proximity to make Shulk jump. Robin gapes at her as well."Hey, aren't you supposed to be on my side?!""Aa... AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"There it is, the famous Shulk Yell. A yell that people scarcely hear outside of the heat of battle. Robin is taken aback for only a moment before she starts yelling again too. The two of them channel all of their energy into their shouts, but in the end..."Y-YES!" The dark red top is the first to stop, with the purple one following shortly after. Robin throws her hands up in the air despite her exhaustion. "ROBIN WINS, BABY!! WOOOOOOOOOOHOO!"Shulk lets out a shaky sigh and then wobbles his way to an empty seat. That was somehow the most exhausting thing he's done all week. And that's saying something considering he's had to do sports, filming, baking... wake up in a burning library...Smash season sure is weird.
LINK VS LUCINA
"HYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA""G... Go top thingy go! You can do it...!""C'mon, you can do better than that!" Robin says to her daughter. When Lucina's cheering doesn't improve, the tactician decides to take things into her own hands: "ALRIGHT, LET'S GO YOU SPINNY TOP THING! MY LUCY NEEDS TO MAKE SOME FRIENDS, SO YOU BETTER WIIIIN!!""M-Mother?! What in the world are you--"The navy blue top hits the green one in just the right way, harshly interrupting its spin. It comes to a stop seconds later. Robin lets out an unrestrained victory cry while Lucina's expression goes from shocked to delighted. Link looks disappointed for a moment, but then he laughs quietly as he retrieves the green top. After congratulating Lucina on the win, he goes to join the group still having fun at the back of the plane. As he passes by, Falco, who has moved forward a few seats to get a better view, scratches his head in confusion as he tries to work out the logistics of this game aloud."I don't get it: so the yelling actually works? And it even works if someone else is cheering for you? ...Do these things understand us?" Sitting in the row ahead, Fox merely chuckles and offers a shrug. "Maybe one day we'll meet someone who knows a thing or two about this game and can tell us all about it..."The person hidden in the cardboard box overhears this and silently relives some forbidden memories. Memories of another fighting tournament...
DAISY VS SAMUS
Daisy stares intently at the picture of the orange bird in the center of the top, trying to channel all her pre-game energy into it. Although Samus agreed to the alliance, the Sarasaland princess still feels determined to win this. "Don't think I'll go easy on you," Samus says from the other side of the arena with a smug grin. Daisy mimics her smile."Me neither!"
Three...

Two...

One...

GO!!!
The orange and cyan tops fall into the arena and start tearin' it up, spinning circles around each other and hitting each other occasionally. Daisy starts hootin' and hollerin' immediately, trying to transmit her energy into the top. Samus, however, stays completely silent as she watches the tops duke it out with a mischievous smile on her face."Hey Daisy. Daisy!" The bounty hunter has to say her name a few times to get her attention. Daisy stops shouting in order to listen to her friend, confused. "I just thought of a really cool date idea. Wanna hear?"Typically the response would be "heck yeah!", but the timing for this conversation is more baffling than anything right now. "Sure...?""Alright, picture this:" As Samus speaks, the tops continue to clang against each other loudly. "The beautiful and endless night sky, filled with stars... A moment of recluse after a long and tiring day with your beloved. The conversation is hushed and personal as the lights grow dim. The two of you get closer and closer until... boom! The most spectacular firework show they've ever seen. ...Not a bad idea, right?"Peach giggles from her seat. "Wow Sammy, I didn't know you could be so romantic~!"As Samus waves off the praise, Daisy can't help but visualize the proposed situation. A night where all is calm - the perfect time for revealing secrets to each other... like how you feel about each other......Oh no.That truly is EXTREMELY ROMANTIC!IT IS SUCH A GOOD IDEA?!?!?!"S-Sammy?! How..." The Sarasaland princess feels like she has suffered a mortal blow. She thought her dating power had been great - greater than most of the Smashers, at least - but little did she know, someone with the potential to be FAR MORE POWERFUL than her has been here all along! She never expected Samus of all people to have these kinds of hidden depths!! "How long have you been thinking about this idea??"Samus chuckles, arching an eyebrow. "What? I told you, I just thought of it. Pretty good for something I came up with on the spot, right?""You're lying! There's no way you just came up with that! You're... You want to go on a date with our host too, don't y--""And the-a winner is... Samus!!""WHAT?!" Daisy looks down to see that the orange top has stopped spinning while the cyan one is still going. "AGHHHH! You distracted me from the match!""Hey, all's fair in love and Smash," Samus shrugs, wearing a wicked grin on her face. Daisy screams in anguish, forever to suffer with the knowledge that she had been beaten at a children's spinning top game so easily. 
CAPTAIN FALCON VS WII FIT TRAINER
Both Captain Falcon and male Wii Fit Trainer are doing stretches before the match begins."Alright, I can accept the screaming, but this?!" Falco gestures towards the two competitors in disbelief. "How is stretching supposed to help in this game??""I guess having the best start possible is one of the most important advantages you can have," Fox says, though he looks dubious as well. Beside him, Marth is watching the fighters intently."I suppose it doesn't hurt to try?""C'mon boys, hurry it up!" Daisy says, clapping her hands together aggressively. "We need to have a winner before the host gets here!" Thank goodness they are taking such a long time. Seriously, what is their host even doing right now? Ridiculous.(Well, aside from the Richter meeting mentioned in the narration at the top of the page, you were also held up by a prank courtesy of the Miis where they swapped all of the furniture between rooms and completely destroyed your feng shui. That was easy enough to fix of course, so what is actually holding you up at this current moment is that Master Hand asked for your opinion on a musical number he's thinking of including in the new Super Smash Bros. movie. You have been listening to the same song with slight lyric changes for over half an hour now. You cannot decide if you want to go to the beach... or back to bed.)"OKAY!" Captain Falcon shifts into position without hesitation, and his opponent soon follows. Mario looks between them for a moment, sighs, and then begins the countdown.
Three...

Two...

One...

GO!!!
Captain Falcon's launch is powerful. The stretching must have paid off, because the red top spins wildly. It's incredibly impressive to watch!Or, it would be... had there been nothing to compare it to.WFT lets out a mighty roar as he launches the white top with more force and elegance than anyone else in this tournament thus far. This is the strength of one who hones their body day and night. This is the technique of someone who can run fifty laps across the beach... and still have the stamina to keep going! It is the most magnificent spinning top launch the world has ever seen, confined right inside Peach's plane. We have to slow down the footage to see its majesty in all its glory. As the top flies through the air on its way to the arena, white light from above hits the surface and refracts out the bottom in every colour of the rainbow. That's right, folks! We did it! We finally made Gay Rights a reality! All discourse and hatred throughout the multiverse ends immediately due to the limitless power of this spin. And it doesn't end there."HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA""N-No!" Falcon gasps, recognizing just how much power is radiating from his opponent. He underestimated the fitness trainer! The white/rainbow top spins circles around his at a speed he can't comprehend, fueled by the power of ULTIMATE FITNESS. But Captain Falcon is not a quitter! Planting his feet in the ground, he draws from the strength within himself. He is now on fire."OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"Male Wii Fit Trainer suddenly flings his arm back behind him, palm open."SISTER! LEND ME YOUR STRENGTH!!"Female Wii Fit Trainer immediately leaps up, planting each foot on the back of a chair in adjacent aisles. She too begins to channel her strength! This is the willpower of one who also hones their body day and night. This is the passion of someone who can swim across the ocean... and then swim all the way back! The twin fitness trainers shout in unison, effectively doubling their strength.“"HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"”"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"
“"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"”

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"
"FINISH IT, BROTHER!" shouts fWFT, thrusting her hands towards her male counterpart as if transmitting an invisible power to him. mWFT's yelling grows in volume and passion as his body is sheathed in a golden aura. Falcon may have him outmatched in raw power, but... now it's time for his counterattack!Male Wii Fit Trainer does a squat with perfect form, and both he and his sister call out the reps simultaneously. "ONE!"Clang! The white/rainbow top hits the red one. A simple hit.Another perfect squat. "TWO!"Clang! The blowback is a bit further this time."THREE!"Clang! But wait: Falcon refuses to give in! The red top does a roundabout maneuver to hit its opponent. "FOUR!"Clang! Oh no! The target saw it coming and retaliates! Falcon can't help but gasp to see the tables be turned on him so easily."FIVE!!!"
CLANG! 
Captain Falcon watches helplessly as his top flies out of the ring in slow motion. It's all over.The Wii Fit Trainers cheer and high-five each other, which transitions into a powerful handshake that looks more like an arm wrestle."Thank you, sister! I couldn't have done it without you!""You know I've always got your back, little brother."The two trainers laugh heartily as the spectators all watch on in awe. mWFT's top is still spinning mightily, as if daring anyone to challenge it."I think we found who the real threat is," Zelda mutters.ROUND 2
ZELDA VS SAMUSThe remaining competitors drew straws again to shuffle the seeds. As the ones who drew the longest straws, the Hyrulian princess and the bounty hunter are up first."Hope you have some other tricks up your sleeve," Zelda says to her opponent before the match begins, "because the tricks you used on Daisy won't work on me."Daisy starts booing at the reminder. Samus chuckles and prepares her launching device. "Tricks? Me? I'd never."Zelda offers a wicked grin in response. "Ooh, you're going down, space girl."Noticing that both challengers are ready, Mario nods and speaks up. "Okay everybody, it'sa round two! Same-a rules as before-a: first to-a stop spinning loses! Only three-a will move onto the-a final round. Get readyyy...! A-three... a-two... a-one... and-a GO!!!"The violet and cyan tops hit the arena at the same time and almost instantly start hitting each other. The ladies start cheering for their tops, indulging in just a good ol' fashion game of Spinning Tops Battle."WOOHOO, YOU CAN DO IT!""C'MON, LET'S GO!""YES! YESSSS!""HIT HER! HIT HER!!""YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA""RRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"The match ends with the violet top as the victor. Samus sighs in disappointment, though her face quickly shifts into a smile."Welp, that was fun while it lasted. Good match, Zel.""You too!" Zelda giggles, proudly retrieving the violet top just before it stops spinning. "At least one of us was going to the final round either way," Daisy muses, the thought helping ease the sting of her own loss. Looks like the Deity of Pulling Straws was on their side today.Hopefully their luck can last all the way through the tournament…
ROBIN VS BOWSER

Three...

Two...

One...

GO!!!
Both competitors start off with a great launch. The purple and yellow tops waste no time attacking each other for dominance. "YES! LET'S GO! ROBIN'S GOING ALL THE WAY TODAY!! WOOHOO!!!""IN YOUR DREAMS! IT'S BOWSER TIME, BABY! I'M GONNA SHOW YOU WHY I'M THE BEST!"The Koopa King lets out a mighty roar that once again shakes the plane. Robin's spinning top, however, is much more resilient than Marth's was and manages to stay in the ring.But not without a loss of speed."No!!" Robin starts to panic, watching with dismay when Bowser's top is clearly on track to win. Bowser starts laughing, believing the match has already been decided. But Robin's a great tactician! She's guided her friends and allies through countless battles using her vast smarts... and a bit of creative thinking.It's all or nothing, baby. She's determined to win this tournament."Elwind!" With lightning-fast reflexes, Robin whips out a green book and pops it open to the exact page she needs to send out a crescent-shaped gust of wind. Now surely if she were to use her magic on one of the tops directly, that would be cheating! But... no one said anything about attacking the arena itself.Strafing to the side as she sends out her magic, the arena and the tops inside it are sent flying towards some of the more agile spectators instead of at Bowser - mainly, towards Daisy and Lucina. With a yelp, the two of them jump out of the way and watch as the arena flies past them before landing face-down, obscuring the tops from sight."Is that even legal?!" Falco squawks. Everyone is thinking the same thing, though in the end it is the ref's call. Mario rushes over and lifts the overturned arena... and the surrounding Smashers gasp!"They're-a still spinning! Both of-a them! The-a match is still-a on!"Somehow, both tops survived the landing and are still spinning strong. Her gambit having paid off, Robin snickers to herself before pointing dramatically, as if commanding an army to attack the enemy."NOW GO, SPINNING UNICORN! GO FORTH AND ELIMINATE KING BOWSER!"As if the spirit of the purple top had been unleashed, it rushes forward and hits its opponent hard. No longer confined by the concave nature of the arena, it is free to spin in circles and hit its more stationary enemy on each pass. Like a gallant steed, it runs by repeatedly so its rider can get in more and more slices with their sword. Robin begins cackling maniacally."NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Bowser roars in frustration, helpless as the yellow top gets battered. In a last ditch effort to win, he does the only thing he can think of."GWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" With a roar that comes straight from the gut, the turtley brute breathes out a stream of fire right at the competing tops. If the elements worked for Robin, then why can't they work for him?! Robin leaps backwards to avoid getting burned. Daisy, Lucina, Marth, Fox, and Falco all have to do the same as well, evacuating the first two rows at the front of the plane in case the fire comes their way. Thankfully, the plane is built to be resistant to the elements - even from inside! - so there are no damages on that end. Well aware of the carnage he's wrought, Bowser starts laughing."What did you think of THAT? Now that's what I call turning up the heat! Bwhahahahaha! Hahahahahaha... ...GUH?!"As the fumes clear, it turns out the unpredictable has happened! Not only is the purple top still spinning (though clearly on its last), but the yellow one... has melted into an unusable lump! Bowser has lost!"W-Wait! Why did mine break but not yours?!"The purple top finally spins out, and once it comes to a complete stop, everyone can see how some of the plastic bits are disfigured, while the metal rings are red hot... but completely intact."I see!" exclaims Marth. "There were two kinds of tops: ones that were only made from plastic, and ones that were made from both plastic and metal.""Bowser's must have been one of the ones with only plastic in it," Peach finishes. Robin giggles deviously to herself before throwing her arms up in the air."WOOHOO! Guess who's going to the finals, baby!!"As Robin is congratulated, Bowser stares mournfully at the melted top. A poke on the arm pulls him out of his woes. It is Villager. They want to be paid for the damages."...Right. How much was it...?"Villager would like to have at least 1000 bells as compensation."WHAT?! That much?? Ughhhh..." With a sigh, Bowser starts to count out the equivalent amount in Mushroom Kingdom coins.
GANONDORF VS LUCINA VS WII FIT TRAINER
In a bracket with seven people, one battle would have to be a three way. And so this is that battle.Lucina looks between her opponents anxiously, already suspecting her odds of winning to be... rather low. mWFT is doing stretches again, while Ganondorf is merely standing there and looking smug. A hand clasps down on Lucina's shoulder, making her jump."You're gonna do great," Robin assures her. Lucina offers her mom a weak smile in return. Daisy's already hollering from the sidelines."Kick their BUTT, girl! Wooooohoo!""You can do it!" Zelda adds. Peach giggles at the others' enthusiasm before adding her own two cents."Just do your best, Lucy! And don't forget to have fun!""Show them what you're made of, kid!" Fox cheers. Beside him, Falco is ravenously eating from a bag of popcorn."Hmph. Your words are wasted on her," Ganondorf says before addressing Lucina directly: "You may as well give up now. Or else you'll find out what happens when you dare challenge me...""You act like we've never fought you on the battlefield before," Marth chuckles. Ganondorf ignores him completely."Don't let him get to you," Shulk says to the blue-haired swordswoman. Then, with a smile: "I'll be rooting for you too! You believed in me even when I was facing off against your mum, so I'll believe in you too.""HEY!" Captain Falcon sends a thumbs up in Lucina's direction. "I'll support you too!"Lucina smiles back, feeling more confident in herself already with everyone's support. "Thank you, Shulk!""HEY, what about me??""Don't forget your breathing!" Female Wii Fit Trainer coaches to her brother. mWFT nods as he starts jogging lightly on the spot, breathing in and out loudly but at a controlled pace."Are we-a ready, everyone?" Mario asks. The three combatants answer at roughly the same time:"Pah, of course.""Yes.""Yes, sir!"Mario hums in affirmation and then gets into his referee stance. Lucina determinedly runs the cord into the launcher for the navy top. Ganondorf calmly snaps the black top into place. Wii Fit Trainer holds the device with the white top inserted out in front of him while he still jogs in place.
THREE...

TWO...

ONE...

GO!!!
All three tops hit the arena at the same time, with the white one again basked in a rainbow aura. This time, Ganondorf wastes no time powering himself up."UUUWWWHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHH..."The black top is suddenly engulfed in a dark, shadowy aura! "A-Already?!" Lucina gasps. Instinctively, she reaches for her sword to fight off the evil... but she comes up empty! Drat! Why did she let her mother convince her to leave Falchion behind today?! She is completely helpless in this battle!Male Wii Fit Trainer gasps as well, taken aback by the power radiating off the Gerudo King. "So this is what the power of true evil is... There is only one way I can win against this...!""Brother!" fWFT calls out, sensing her twin's intentions. "You can't possibly mean to use that technique?!""I must! It is the only way!"fWFT's expression is solemn, but after a moment she nods. "...Very well then. I believe you are ready.""Thank you for your confidence in me! Here it goes!" mWFT sucks in a very deep and calculated breath: "HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...""What in the world?!" This new technique has drawn the attention of Richter Belmont, who turns away from the kids' tournament to see the fitness trainer awash in a rippling, golden aura. The man gasps with recognition. "Isn't this... No! It can't be!""Just spit it out!" Bowser groans."How could you possibly know what this is?? You’re from different worlds!" Falco complains. Richter completely ignores him, remaining serious and in shock."The ability to create an energy equivalent to the sun itself using only your breathing... I thought the tribe proficient in this art had been wiped out centuries ago!""It is a technique that is difficult to learn - especially without anyone left to teach it," female Wii Fit Trainer reveals, watching her brother with a sense of pride. "But with enough training, anything can be accomplished! We've honed our body and mind for years in order to use this technique!""ALLOW ME TO SHOW YOU THE RESULTS OF MY SISTER'S COACHING!" mWFT shouts, the golden energy pulsating around him. "HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! SUNLIGHT YELLOW! OOOOOOVEEEERRRRDRIIIIIIIIIVE!!!"Bathed in this new golden light, the white top rushes towards the black one and they have a collision of epic proportions. Ganondorf raises a brow, unfazed."Hmph! Interesting! Show me what you've got, fool!"The dark aura seems to grow stronger as the black top aggressively hits back. As these two powerhouses wage war with each other, the poor navy blue top gets caught in the mayhem and is sent flying out of the ring. Lucina covers her face in disbelief."I-I didn't even stand a chance...!"As Lucina retrieves the top and does the walk of shame to her seat, these unstoppable forces of good and evil continue to clash as if there had been no third party in the first place. Both Ganondorf and Wii Fit Trainer continue their never ending battle cry, with neither top letting up or slowing down. It seems they are at a standstill. The power of sunlight and the power of shadow are equally matched."Heh heh heh! Impressive! But how will you handle... THIS?!"Suddenly, Ganondorf brings out his sword and holds it high in the air. The whole audience gasps. It's the sword! The unused sword of legend! Its mere presence is enough to change the tides of battle!"N... Nooooooooooooooo!" Utterly overpowered, mWFT is sent flying backwards and collapses on the ground with the white top landing beside him. The whole plane (well, everyone who's watching - which includes some of the kids now since the commotion had drawn their attention) is in awe. Daisy is the first to break the silence, clenching her fists."N... No way..."Female Wii Fit Trainer rushes over to her counterpart. "Brother! Are you alright?!""I... I'm sorry sister... I've let you down..."fWFT shakes her head. "Not at all. You performed well. The fact is simply that you are still young and have much more to learn.""Y... Yes... I... d-do..."His head falls to the side and he goes unconscious. Shulk frowns, looking on in concern. "Um, will he be alright...?"The still-conscious Wii Fit Trainer nods and rises from her crouching position. "Of course. One should always have a good night's sleep after a heavy workout. He should be in peak condition once again after a solid eight hours of sleep. I'm afraid until then, the best he'll be able to do is..." She turns her head to face the others, face solemn. "...fifty laps across the beach instead of one hundred.""Are you telling me all that only halved his strength??" Falco squawks in disbelief. As mWFT is moved into a seat, Richter approaches fWFT."Hey, would you mind teaching me how to use that sun power some time? Would be really handy in my line of work."The trainer looks shocked to be receiving such a question. "Not many people have the aptitude to learn it. However..." She smiles. "Certainly! Meet me in the gym tomorrow morning and we can begin your training.""You all seem to be forgetting something much more important than any of the nonsense you're talking about," Ganondorf says, apparently tired of being ignored. "I won the match. That means I will be moving onto the finals.""WHO CARES?" Bowser roars. "YEAH, you won! WHATEVER!""Sounds like someone's jealous.""NO I'M NOT!!!"FINAL ROUND
ZELDA VS GANONDORF VS ROBINThis is it.The beginning of the end. The three challengers prepare themselves with an air of confidence around them. After the insanity of the matches in round two, most of the plane is watching this one, standing and sitting across the aisles. The only Smashers who continue to not care about the competition in the slightest are Pichu - who is having a blast playing alone with all the abandoned tops - and Jigglypuff. Luigi has dropped the pretense of reading and has scooted forward a few aisles to watch. Greninja is still sitting in their seat and is seemingly paying attention to the match, but the cardboard box has moved further around the corner. "So Zel," Robin says casually as she works the purple top into the launcher. Although the plastic is a bit warped and melted now, it still seems to work just fine. The tactician declined accepting a substitute - this one got her this far, so she may as well go the whole way. "Since one of us is obviously going to win this--""Heh! If telling yourself that will ease the sting of defeat, then go ahead."Robin completely ignores Ganondorf's interruption as she continues: "--why don't we make the prize a bit more interesting?""Hey!" Daisy yells, upset about this rule change already. "We already made an agreement!""We did," Robin acknowledges, "and those terms haven't changed. I just wanted to add a little something to it.""...What did you have in mind?" Zelda is unable to contain her curiosity. Robin's grin grows."Winner gets dibs on hanging out with the host first."Daisy lets out a noise of disgust, frumping and crossing her arms. Zelda tilts her head, studying the tactician carefully. Now why would she...?"You're really into this, huh?" Fox notes wryly, which prompts Robin to giggle deviously."Aren't you married?" Marth asks, visibly puzzled. "Why do you--" Before he can finish however, he is cut off by Bowser, who is trying so hard to pretend the prize never interested him."YEAH! Why do you care so much??"Robin lets out a noise of disbelief, feigning offense. "Are you saying I'm not allowed to form a deep and meaningful platonic bond with someone? That everything has to be about romance? I'm ashamed of you boys."Both the Altean prince and the Koopa King look shocked for a moment before glancing away awkwardly. For several others in the plane - such as Zelda, Daisy, and Samus - the pieces finally fall into place."You sly witch," Samus chuckles."How rude! I'm a tactician, not a witch. There's a huge difference!"When Daisy proposed the alliance, the idea was that not only would there always be someone to shield their host from Bad Vibes, but it also meant any of the girls could come and go from the group without fear of being shooed away by a pesky unwanted individual (or said individual physically whisking the host away). Additionally, if any of the ladies had any ULTERIOR MOTIVES, there wouldn't be much they could do alone. One person can't hang out with someone AND chase away someone who is "in" on the hangout clause at the same time. At least, not very easily.However... what if there was an extra person involved somewhere?Daisy glances at Lucina knowingly, who doesn't seem to be privy to her mother's plans. Clearly Robin's intention is to have her daughter and the host mingle at the beach, and then the tactician would spend the rest of the day cleverly keeping the others away from them!! They may have an alliance, but if anyone can find loopholes or feign ignorance to breaking the terms they agreed upon... it would be Robin. Daisy has only known the silver-haired woman for a few days, but she definitely seems like that kind of person."No deal!" Daisy replies, making sure her disapproval is plain to see. She's onto these tricks! But Robin simply smiles back and shakes her head. "Ah-ah-ah! You lost, remember? You don't have a say in this one."Daisy frowns even harder before turning to the Hyrulean princess. "Say no, Zel - there's something fishy about this new rule.""...Sure." For a moment, Daisy looks relieved... until Zelda continues with a smile: "Sounds fun. I agree to add this little condition of yours, Robin.""Zel!!""I knew you wouldn't be able to resist," Robin says with her cocky smile. In the third corner, Ganondorf hums in thought. We are already dreading what he has to say."So let me get this straight: the winner of this competition has the right to the pathetic host's attention for the rest of the day? And we are all in agreement that none may breach this contract?""It's only for the beach trip!" Daisy corrects bitingly. "Also, it's completely optional!" Peach adds, trying to hide her nervousness to hear the King of Evil's sudden interest. "You don't have to spend time with them if you don't want to.""Oh, but why would I discard a prize I rightfully earned? Only a fool would do such a thing.""You said you weren't interested!" Bowser snarls. Ganondorf chuckles to himself before holding up the launching device in preparation for battle."Enough talk, worms. Are you prepared to suffer defeat by my hand? Or will you prolong this little game even more than you already have?"This sucks. This! SUCKS! Daisy glares at the three competitors, feeling the sting of betrayal from her two once-allies. With a bitter sigh, she resigns herself to the lesser of the three evils and places her hands on Zelda's shoulders, looking her directly in the eyes."You HAVE to win this. You just gotta!""Aww, Daisy, don't I get some support too?" Robin calls out playfully. Daisy refuses to look at her. Zelda removes the princess' hands from her shoulders with a confident smile."Oh, don't worry. I'm not planning on losing." She locks the violet top into the launcher and gets into battle stance. "Do your worst." Her eyes are on Robin when she says this. The tactician catches her gaze and grins in response as she moves into position."Remember: you asked for it."With all three combatants ready, Mario prepares himself as well. He takes a deep breath before getting into his referee stance. The tension in the air is palpable. "It's the-a final round, everybody! The-a last top spinning decides the-a victor! Get ready...!"The audience goes quiet from the anticipation. Everyone has abandoned their regular seating preferences to form a ring around the battle circle, either sitting or standing in a place where they can see the action. It's the quietest the plane has been since the Smashers started to board for today's trip. Pichu is still playing with the tops in the back and is being monitored by R.O.B.. Diddy Kong has started taking bets on who people think the winner will be. The people's guesses are evenly split. "A-three..."Will it be Ganondorf, who is guaranteed to abuse the prize and terrorize the host's good day?"A-two..."Will it be Robin, who is certain to turn her back on the alliance in order to stick her nose in her daughter's relationships?"A-one...!"Or will it be Zelda, who may or may not have unseen hidden intentions of her own?We may already know the answer because we, as an outside audience, have access to the near future. But for the Smashers at this very moment, this is one of the most tense scenes to happen since their arrival for the Ultimate season."and-a..."""GO!!!"" Everyone in the plane cheers the final word out simultaneously, caught up in the excitement of this silly little spinning tops game. As the three competitors launch their tops of choice, there is a voice that goes unheard by all except one. A voice from under the cardboard box.
"Let it rip."
The tops hit the arena, beginning their final, climatic clash within seconds. Blurs of violet, purple, black, and grey zip up, down, and all around as the four spinning tops duke it out for supremacy.Wait... four?!"Wh-Where did that fourth one come from?!" Marth gasps, looking around for any sign of whomst could have launched it."I-It's not even the same kind..." Lucina points out. This spinning grey top is much larger than the other ones and has a narrow handle coming out from above. Ganondorf grits his teeth, absolutely APPALLED that someone would DARE interfere on his victory match like this."Who is responsible for this?!" Peach leans in from her seat to try and study this strange top. "Isn't this... one of R.O.B.'s?"All pairs of eyes instantly turn to look at the robot, who is still lingering at the back of the plane. He calmly looks back and forth across the crowd, unaware of why everybody is looking at him. "R.O.B...." Fox begins, taking initiative before anyone gets any impulsive ideas, "...where are your gyros?"R.O.B. stares at Fox for a moment before looking down at himself, opening up a compartment on his body. It is empty. The robot stares into the empty void for a moment before looking back up, as if confused."Doesn't look like he knows what happened either," Samus says. It is an enigma to all. It is not like there is a sneaky Smasher with incredibly fast reflexes and sticky fingers among them who could have taken it while the robot was focused on the kids' spinning top game. And it is not like when everyone was distracted with the start of the match, that said Smasher could have heard the agreed-upon codewords "let it rip" from an inconspicuous cardboard box, and then used their sticky appendages to jump onto the ceiling and drop the gyro into the arena. And when all was said and done, they would sit back in their seat at the back of the plane as if nothing had happened.That certainly couldn't have happened at all.Absolutely no one knows who it could have possibly been."...The-a gyro stays!" Mario announces after a moment of consideration. "The-a official Super Smash Brothers rulebook allows surprise entrants in the-a middle of a tournament as-a long they-a join at the-a beginning of a match! This was a valid entry!"The mood between the three competitors grows more tense. The gyro is not a threat as an opponent - whoever dropped it into the arena gave it a weak launch and it stops spinning quickly - but its size not only prevents the other tops from interacting, but also makes it easy for them to get trapped under it."I... I can't knock it out," Robin admits, gripping her tome tightly. She had plans to use it in this final match, but... Even targeting this thing directly, her magic blasts are too big! The other tops would get caught in the blast! Her stunt in the match against Bowser had been a last ditch effort to win when things were going south for her. There is absolutely no guarantee that the purple top would land safely and continue spinning. It's just too big of a risk, especially when Ganondorf might win. The tactician may have her own agenda, but she agrees that the King of Evil should not be allowed to win this under ANY circumstances. She'll gladly give up her plans to prevent that from happening.Ganondorf finds himself in a similar boat. In a previous match, he had hit the ground to make the tops jump, but that is no longer a viable option for him! The risk of the gyro landing on his top - or vice versa - and ruining its momentum is too great. No, this all-important match must be won the old fashioned way... through sheer luck.And screaming.
"UUUWWWHHHHHOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"

"HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
The plane is filled with passionate energy-building screams, supported by spectators. They begin yelling too in support of their favourite competitor. While these matches only go on for a couple minutes at most, this one feels like an eternity. Three spinning tops are locked in a stalemate as R.O.B.'s gyro continuously gets in their way. Until, finally...!"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Ganondorf lets out an unrestrained roar of rage as the black top is caught on the gyro when the latter is flung out of the arena with a good hit. The top falls to the floor, defeated. Ganondorf falls to his knees, also defeated."Ganondorf has been-a eliminated!" Mario announces. There are several cheers throughout the plane. As soon as the main threats have been removed, the remaining two arm themselves: Robin with her magic tome, and Zelda with a ball of energy at her fingertips. Seems like they both had the same idea."So are we gonna wait it out," Robin asks with a wide grin, "or are we going to let some magical interference decide the results for us?""And if we both lose that way?" Zelda asks, wearing the same grin. Robin shrugs."Uhhh, Daisy gets her date?""YES!" Daisy does a fist pump. On the other side of the crowd, an upset Captain Falcon goes "AW COME ON!" at this sudden rule change."Sure, why not?" Zelda chuckles. "On three?"The tactician nods in approval and they begin counting together. ""One... two... three!""Zelda throws a blast of light at the arena while Robin sends out a blast of wind. The arena and the tops within go flying in all different directions. The audience scatters best they can to avoid getting hit, but instead it just makes it harder to find where everything ended up."Quick!" Zelda cries out. "We need to know who won!"Many of the Smashers start scrambling to find where the two spinning tops ended up. Several get down to look under the seats. Luigi shakily holds up the plastic arena that hit him on the head. After a few more seconds, Popo and Nana cry out in unison:""Found one!""Popo holds up the dark purple top - the one belonging to Robin. Nana confirms: "It wasn't moving anymore!""Nooooooooo!" Robin cries dramatically. "I was so close!!""Where's the other one?!" Falco calls out, looking around wildly. Some people are getting confused by the tops of other colours still lying all over the place. A few seconds more, and--"IT'S STILL SPINNING-- ow." Leaf bumps her head in her excitement to get back up. When she peeks her head out of the aisle, she's wearing a huge grin on her face. "It's under here! Look!"Zelda pushes past the throng of eager Smashers to see for herself. Crouching down, she spots the violet top under the chairs... and just in time too - a few seconds more and it would have gone still by the time they found it."Zelda wins!" Mario announces, and the whole plane hoots 'n hollers at how thrilling this event had been. What a great match. Someone is throwing the beach ball around again. The plane is filled with idle chatter regarding the epic plays throughout both tournaments as all the Smashers gradually return to their seats. Megaman, Richter, Lucina, Luigi, and Red help Villager locate and pocket all the tops and related supplies used for the game. Diddy Kong is trying to sneak off with the betting money. R.O.B. finally gets to put his gyro away. Daisy sighs in remorse."Dang it! I could have won at the end there," the princess muses. "Oh well! At least we still have our alliance!" "But I still get to hang out with them first," Zelda reminds her. Daisy's expression turns to displeasure."Whatever! You better let me hang out with them next as soon as you're done though!""I'm not making any promises.""Ooooooh... you!" The Sarasaland princess seems to have more to say, but then remembers the time. She starts heading for the exit of the plane, speaking over her shoulder. "I'm gonna see what's taking them so long - save me a seat so I can sit beside them on the way there!" "Again: no promises!" Daisy turns around a full 180 degrees and sticks out her tongue at Zelda before leaping out of the plane. The Hyrulean princess laughs before taking a seat next to Samus."So?" Samus starts, waggling her eyebrows. "You actually saving her a seat?""Eh, why not?" With the competitive air dropped, Zelda has no reason to get in Daisy's way. The princess is interested in getting to know their host, but... she's not in any rush. "Don't get me wrong - I plan to keep her on her toes today, but she genuinely wants to spend time with them, so it would be mean to the both of them if I mess up their fun plans." She honestly would be saying the same thing even if it was someone else - Marth, Robin, Link, Fox, Peach, Samus, Shulk, Lucina... or even Captain Falcon! Most of the Smashers are good people, and their host seems like someone who needs individuals like that in their life. Characters like Bowser and especially Ganondorf make Zelda feel a bit more wary but... hey, if the host ever wanted to hang out with them for some reason, then who's she to judge? She doesn't really have a horse in this race....Not yet, anyways."That's very generous of you," Samus replies, seemingly unsurprised by the response. "Guess you'll be hanging out with them today, then?""At least for a little bit. Not sure about the whole day. How about you? Going to take advantage of our 'alliance'? Maybe reenact that little 'date' idea you had?"Samus lets out a loud laugh. "You KNOW I only said that stuff to make fun of her - totally not interested at all. I plan to spend the whole day relaxing on the beach. Maybe at one point I'll take a cruise out onto the water to see where I end up." The blonde bounty hunter pulls out a pair of sunglasses, puts them on her face, and relaxes in her seat. "...But we'll see what happens.""Hmmm, that idea isn't half bad," Zelda chuckles. "I was thinking I'd eventually make my way away from the beach to study the local flora. The wildlife in Kirby's world has always been fascinating.""Nerd.""Shush, you." There's a pause as the princess thinks for a moment, then she claps her hands together. "Oh! Do you think our host would enjoy that sort of thing as well?! The two of us, sitting in the grass under the sun... And then: boom! Fireworks. It would be quite romantic, wouldn't you agree?"Samus is silent for a moment, but she can't help herself from letting out a snort and breaking out into a steady laugh. Zelda joins in, snickering before falling into unrestrained laughter. When their noise garners the attention of Robin and Peach who want to know what's so funny, Zelda leans over to repeat the joke and they all start giggling about it together.Meanwhile, at the back of the plane, Greninja is leaned in to hear the voice from inside the box."Greninja," the deep masculine voice says, "I need you to go sit at the front of the plane so nobody can connect the two of us together. We'll reconvene when we return to the mansion to share the results of the mission. Keep all contact to a minimum until then."The frog Pokemon nods and leaps from their seat to rush to the front. They quickly plop down in the window seat that's in the same row as Ganondorf and Link. Having watched this sequence plays out, Richter can't help but request the attention of the Ice Climbers a couple seats over to ask the pivotal question:"Hey, what's with that cardboard box?"Both Nana and Popo look back at the box before responding."Oh,""That?"""You learn to get used to it.""

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“Finally! Somewhere I can get some peace and quiet!”

Falco looks over the small island with satisfaction. One could hardly call it an island really - it’s more like a sand dune off the coast of the ocean with a single palm tree growing out of it - but that’s part of what makes it so darn

perfect.

There’s absolutely

no

reason for anyone to come out here! It’s far enough that you can barely hear anyone back on shore too.

Oh yeah. This is paradise.

The most unfortunate thing about the

Smash

season is just how freakin’

hectic

it is. Sure, it’s great to see everybody, but there’s always

something

going on to interrupt any

personal

time that one tries to have. Competition, fights, conspiracies… like c’mon, a guy can’t even just chill out in his room by himself without worrying about the walls burning down!

Listen. Falco loves a good scrap as much as anyone else. He loves going to all the different worlds and seeing all the different cultures. And hey, he won’t admit this to their faces, but he has a lot of fun hanging out with all-- okay,

most

of the zany Smashers.

But sometimes a guy just needs to chill out on a private island and soak up the rays.

The feathered pilot hums to himself as he sets up a lawn chair he brought with him. Honestly? He probably could have gotten the peace he wanted if he stayed at the mansion. Ever since the

incident

involving Ganondork and the King of Klowns that blew up his room, Falco’s been staying with Fox while the repairs were being done. It’s really weird they’ve been taking more than a couple days, but whatever, maybe MH has been too busy with the tournament prep to work his magic. And yeah, he and Fox are great friends and all - probably one of his

best

friends, if we’re being honest - but dang he misses having his own room. No clue why the host can’t just let him stay in one of the other zillion empty rooms. Sheesh, and about that host--

Falco plops down on the lawn chair and puts on a pair of sunglasses before relaxing. Where was he? Right, anyways, about the room situation. Since Fox was going to the beach along with the majority of the mansion, it might’ve made more sense for the blue birdie to stay behind to get the peace he so craved. But the sun in that world ain’t that warm, and the air is always brisk and stale. Nah, Falco would rather soak up the heat and feel the breeze from the ocean. Now that’s PRIME relaxation!

Falco finds himself smirking as he basks in the vibes. The warm, peaceful vibes. Now THIS is what Smash season is all about. Aw yeah.

After a few minutes, he hears something rustling in the sand. Eh, must be a crab. Hey, you leave me alone and I leave you alone, right buddy? Heh.

The rustling doesn’t stop. There’s a low chuckle. A

familiar

chuckle.

Falco shoots upright and rips the sunglasses off his face, glaring at the intruder on

his

island.

“What are YOU doing here?!”

The intruder is none other than Bowser. The giant Koopa is spearing a flag with the Bowser insignia into the sand.

“What’s it look like?? I’m laying claim to this puny island!! Bwhahaha!”

“What?? Uh, no you’re not!” Falco leaps from the chair and stomps over, grabbing the flag and pulling it out of the sand. “You got sand in your eyes? I was here first!”

Bowser growls and grabs the flagpole, trying to go against Falco’s strength and shove it back into the ground. “Uh-huh? Where’s YOUR flag?”

“I don’t have one!”

“Then how can this island be yours if you didn’t put a flag in it? Explain THAT, loser!”

“I never said the island was mine, just that I was here first!”

“Doesn’t matter if you were here first when the island is MINE. You gotta PAY ME if you want to keep lounging here, bwhahaha!”

“I’m not paying you anything! I’ll throw you into the ocean if I have to!”

“Pfft, I’d like to see you try, pipsqueak!”

The two of them continue to wrestle with the flag, neither budging an inch. Falco

hates

to admit it, but the big guy does have him beat in the physical strength department, so he’s unable to fully overpower him. Suddenly, Bowser gets distracted by something and looks out to sea. Falco follows his gaze.

Out in the water is a boat. What, is Peach on that boat? Is that why the big guy is so distracted? Wait, hold on, on closer inspection it looks more like… Pit… Shulk? That looks like Samus driving the boat… and that brunette looks like that Daisy chick… oh, and that’s probably the host. They must all be on a boat ride or something. But why’s Bowser so interested in them? He got a thing for Daisy like he does for Peach or something?

“...Hey!!” Bowser’s loud voice snaps Falco out of his thoughts, and he turns back to Bowser’s gruff expression. “I’m sure you wanna pay the debt you owe for lounging on MY ISLAND, right??”

“I’m not paying you anything, and it’s not your island!”

“Be quiet! I’m going to take pity on you and offer you a once-in-a-lifetime discount! I’ll let you have this island IF… you can launch me over there!!”

“What?” Falco relaxes his strength out of confusion. Bowser stops struggling against him, instead glaring at the pilot with a deadly serious expression. “Over where?”

“THERE!” Bowser points at the boat. “Hah! You probably think that’s too far for you!”

“Oh you wanna know what I think? Here's what I think!” Before the brute can change his mind, Falco swerves around to Bowser’s other side and channels all his strength - channels all his desire for a FREAKIN’ RELAXING BEACH VACATION FOR ONCE - to punt Bowser as far as he can. The giant Koopa roars as he sails through the sky, and Falco is satisfied to see him cannonball into the water with a mighty splash, rocking the boat and pushing away all the nearby swimmers. Now THAT was a great hit! Real shame this wasn't for the Home-Run Contest, that might've been a personal best. And with a heavier load! Haha!

Falco throws the flag down in disgust - kicking sand on it for good measure - before plopping back down on the lawn chair.

He has no idea why Bowser wanted to be punted across the ocean, but hey…

...if you’re given the opportunity to show that obnoxious turtle who’s the

real

king of the island, then, well, there's nothing to do but to just

take it.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

You’re back on the plane, waiting to return home to your realm. Despite the rain being a clear signal that it’s time to go home, you’ve already been sitting here for about ten minutes. You’ve all been waiting so long that someone has started a friendly Beyblade competition - which is kind of weird at first, because you didn't think they'd know about Beyblade! Not only that, but a lot of them happened to be carrying them around apparently. Must be a general Smasher hobby. While this is happening, you find yourself looking out the window every now and then to see how the Falcon Wrangling is going. Fox just recently left to help Link and Mario, but their combined efforts still aren't enough to force Captain Falcon onto the plane. They look like they're getting pretty close though, so maybe the next person to go out there will be the one that does it.The seat arrangements feel like they’ve changed completely, and you didn’t have Daisy around to force you to sit up front with the rest of the ladies, so instead you’re sitting with Isabelle and Greninja closer to the back. You wanted to talk to Isabelle to thank her for and return the wet suit, and then offer her a tour of the mansion since you haven’t done so already. The cute yellow dog accepted with glee. Greninja nudges you to show you something. The Pokemon carefully lifts their webbed hands to reveal their new friend - the frog they snatched from Kirby's world. It ribbits, and Greninja quickly covers it again. You’re not sure if it’s okay for the Smashers to be taking natural wildlife out of different worlds, but you decide not to say anything about it. Personally, you have no qualms with seeing one or two cute little frogs hop around your realm!We at the Super Smash Bros. Committee LOVE frogs, and would be happy to see more of them in Smash.Anyways, you must be tired from the long day because you keep thinking there’s muttering coming from the cardboard box back here. Greninja doesn’t seem to hear it - they just keep peeking at the frog in their hands - so you assume you are imagining things and decide not to investigate the box at all.“THERE you are!” Suddenly you hear Daisy’s voice among the plane chatter, and look up to see her boarding the plane with Marth and Bowser in tow. All three of them are soaked from the rain. The Sarasaland princess immediately rushes over to your seat with a big grin, dripping water the whole way. Behind her, Bowser shoves Marth out of the way so he can reach your position as well. “I heard someone else gave you a swimsuit - which is GREAT, I’m glad you didn’t have to wait around for us! - but I wanted to give this to you anyways! Y’know, for next time!!”Before you can process what’s happening, Daisy shoves the swimsuit she picked out in your face with a triumphant “ta-daaa!!!”. As you might expect from a swimsuit from Daisy, it’s orange and white with a tropical flower motif. It actually thematically matches her swimsuit. You wonder if that was intentional, or she just liked the design. Regardless, it actually doesn't look too bad. Decent length, wouldn't be too embarrassing to wear, wouldn't cling to your skin uncomfortably--“NO, the host is going to want to wear MINE next time!” Bowser roars, pushing Daisy out of the way to show you the swimsuit he picked. It looks skin-tight and considerably more... "skimpy" than Daisy's pick (or maybe it’s just kind of small?). It’s mostly black, but there’s a bit of a flame pattern on it. Oh and there are spikes protruding from it. Without feeling it, you don’t know if they’re made from real metal or not, but it… looks like it would be uncomfortable to wear either way…“I--” Marth finally approaches, looking a little winded. “It’s alright if you don’t like it, but I figured-- if their choices are a bit too extravagant or revealing for you--”He holds out the swimsuit he picked: a dark blue one-piece with a few thin horizontal stripes on it. Hm, that would probably feel similar to how the wetsuit felt… But is that necessarily a good thing…?...Wait why are you actually trying to judge this.“Uhhhhhhh,” is all you can say as your eyes dart back and forth to take in the three different swimsuits being presented to you. Is this weird? Is it weird for people to be gifting you swimsuits? You really don’t know. Well, they wanted to help… and it would be rude to turn down a gift…“Y’know what? I think I could find a use for all of them, if that’s okay.” You pick your words carefully to sound as impartial and grateful as possible. “M-Most of the swimsuits in my closet don’t fit me, and I really like being able to mix it up every now and then!”None of them say anything for a moment. Bowser definitely is the least satisfied with your answer. He wanted you to pick a victor. Thankfully, Daisy saves your skin before you can be pressured back into the fray.“Now that I’m thinking about it, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you wear the same outfit twice…”“Now that you mention it, neither have I,” Marth agrees. His mouth curves into a sheepish smile. “Haha, do you have more clothes than you can wear as well? I understand how that can be.”“Yeah, that’s me!” You nod vigorously, happy to move away from the competition they were having. “Seriously, you should see my closet. Maybe you’ve seen the costume closet in the performance hall? Imagine that but double.” Hey, most of your clothing comes from random articles falling through rifts, or were clothes your ancestors collected. It’s a wonder you have as much in your size (or close to it - you’ll wear bigger clothes) as you do.“That’s awesome!” Daisy exclaims, clearly impressed. “Well, let’s add to that collection! And maybe you can show me all your cool clothes some time!”“Y-Yeah… haha…”One by one, Daisy, Marth, and Bowser drop their swimsuit choices into your lap. There are no free seats near you, so none of them can sit and chill with you til the plane takes off. Bowser grumpily walks off. Marth looks a bit flustered as he waves goodbye and goes to find a seat. Finally, Daisy’s enthusiasm remains in place as she says bye and rushes back to the front where the other girls are sitting. When the three of them are gone from your personal bubble, you breathe a sigh of relief. “Hehe, you’re a clothing hoarder too?” In the seat beside you, Isabelle gives you an embarrassed smile. “The mayor’s closet is MUCH worse than mine, but I have to admit I have trouble cleaning out things I don’t wear anymore. Here - why don’t you keep this?”She digs through her bottomless pocket and pulls out the wetsuit you borrowed earlier.“Oh no, I couldn’t--”“It’s okay!” Despite your protests, Isabelle places the neatly folded garment onto your lap with the other swimsuits. “I have more in different colours - and I can order them if I ever need more!”“Oh… well, thank you.” You look at the pile of swimsuits on your lap. You… definitely didn’t expect to be getting all these when you agreed to the beach trip. Curious, you move the wetsuit to the bottom and start examining the other three swimsuits, trying to figure out if they’ll actually fit you. None of them have any tags on them, so you have no idea how much they cost or what clothing brand made them. Most peculiar, you realize, is that you didn’t think your proportions would be common enough in the Kirby world for there to be clothes in your size, nevermind swimsuits...Where in the world did those three get these…?

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“So about those strippers you ordered…”

Zelda’s gaze follows their host as they leave the room with Inkling, Isabelle, and Lucina. She doesn’t say anything to them or make any gestures, just watches them go with amusement. It wasn’t her

intention

to make them leave with her prank call idea, but… haha, well, these things happen.

Apparently the host was her good luck charm though, because as soon as the door clicks shut, the prank starts going south.

“This is a scam, isn’t it?!”

The voice on the other end of the line starts getting aggressive after repeatedly denying ever ordering any strippers.

“I won’t be hearing any more of this! You better not call here again or I’ll call the cops on you!”

Click.

They hung up.

“That sounded like a man who’s guilty of going to the strip club behind his wife’s back,” Palutena says. There’s a murmur of agreement around the room.

“Are you going to try again?” Corrin asks, looking at Zelda expectantly. The Hyrulean princess thinks about it, staring at the phone thoughtfully. She really should! It would be no fun if she ended up being the only one with a failed prank call. Especially when everyone else had such good ones! But should she call the same guy, or try a new number? As she mentally weighs the pros and cons of each option, she notices Robin getting up and approaching the host’s desk.

“What are you doing?” Zelda asks. Robin looks back at her with

devious

intent.

“What’s it look like? I’m

snooping!”

The tactician lets out a witch’s cackle and starts eagerly rummaging through drawers. As if a switch had been flipped from her unabashed honesty, several others rise to their feet as well. Samus, Palutena, and Daisy start exploring the room, while Zelda, Jigglypuff, Corrin, and Peach remain sitting on the floor.

“Ohh, now that’s not very nice,” Peach chides, frowning. Daisy is the only one who pays her any mind - but only to wave off her concerns.

“Don’t worry Peachy, we just want to learn more about the host!” Peach knows Daisy well enough that she can believe her. But she's amazed at how strongly she seems to believe that the others don’t have any ulterior motives. “Maybe we can find out what they like!”

“So you can take them out on a date?” Zelda asks teasingly with a raised eyebrow. Daisy winks at her.

“Maaaaaybe!”

Zelda sighs and shakes her head, unable to hide her smile. “Well, if you can’t beat ‘em…” She gets up and starts looking around as well. Peach frowns disapprovingly, but knows it's futile to protest now. She simply remains seated and takes a sip from her glass of water.

“Oooh, is this what I think it is?” Palutena pulls a photo album off the shelf and flips it open with a grin. Daisy and Zelda approach to check out its contents as well. All three of their smiles fall as Palutena flips through the pages.

“Is something wrong?” Corrin asks - shifting from her position on the floor - unable to hide her curiosity. Palutena turns the album around and holds it up for everyone else to see.

“All the pictures are messed up,” the goddess explains. It’s true,

every single picture

in the album has something wrong with it. Some of them are blurry, others are faded, some are covered in scratches… Did the host not take care of these pictures?

“Hold on,” Zelda says, taking the album from Palutena’s hands to look at the pictures closer. “All these pictures… you can’t see the faces in any of them.”

Palutena and Daisy take another look, while both Corrin and Peach get up to look as well. She’s right! All those damages and imperfections… they all obscure the people’s faces. Some pictures have it worse than others, but overall it’s bad enough that it is incredibly difficult to locate recurring people throughout the album.

“None of these pictures even look like the host,” Daisy notes, and the others are inclined to agree. There are pictures of both children and adults - some of which might be the same person years later - but there’s nothing that reminds them of the host they know and love.

“These could just be

very

old,” Palutena points out, and she pulls a picture out of the pocket. "Most people start to look different when time passes, you know! Unless of course, you're a beautiful timeless goddess like me." She flips it over and reads the date on the back. “Hmm… actually not as old as I was expecting.”

The girls start pulling pictures out and examining the dates. Many worlds have a different calendar system - this realm they find themselves in during this Smash season has none that they are aware of - so it’s hard to say exactly how old these photos are, but they’re all from the same era. The time discrepancy between the oldest picture they find (a picture of a baby with the eyes scratched out) and the newest (a very bleached group picture of smiling young adults) is only about twenty something years.

“...These pictures are starting to creep me out!” Daisy thrusts all the pictures she swiped into Corrin’s hands and turns away, unable to keep the uneasiness off her face. She looks around wildly for something more

fun

to snoop through, eventually deciding on checking on Samus in the bathroom. “Find anything cool??”

“Just some empty pill bottles.” The bounty hunter holds up two handfuls of pill bottles - all different sizes and colours. None of the labels are legible thanks to being torn, water damaged, or completely blank.

“That’s just like how the pictures are,” Zelda mumbles, trying to piece together the mystery that was

Their Host.

Daisy, still frowning, grabs a few of the bottles to examine herself. Maybe they’re prescriptions from a time their host was sick? ...But then why are they still here??

“If they’re empty then why don’t they throw them out??”

“Maybe they still need to order a refill,” Samus jokes as she starts to put them back in the cabinet she found them in. Daisy keeps staring at the bottles in her hands.

“They don’t seem sick to me…”

“You can’t always tell how people are doing on the inside,” Peach reminds her, taking the bottles from her with dainty hands and putting them back on the shelf. The Sarasaland princess scratches her head.

“Yeah, that’s true.” Gah, if only their host would

talk

to them more. At least talk to

her!

Daisy prides herself on being a GREAT listener. If their host is struggling with something, she wants to help!!

“I think it’s more likely that they’re just a hoarder,” Palutena says, glancing around the bathroom not-so-subtly to see if it hides any other secrets. “I’ve found that mortals tend to hold onto things they don’t need anymore because they have trouble letting go of

memories

or

feelings

associated with it. This can include the bad stuff too. I believe there are even plenty of gods that are guilty of similar habits as well.”

Daisy canNOT imagine why someone would

want

to keep around a bunch of empty pill bottles that don’t even have labels on them. It simply doesn’t make sense in her brain.

“JACKPOT!” Robin’s triumphant voice prompts everyone to leave the bathroom. When they return to the bedroom, they see the tactician holding up an old journal and speaking in a singsong voice: “Guess who found a diary~?”

Peach gasps. “Oh no Robin, you can’t go through that!”

“C’moooon, aren’t you curious? This is the BEST WAY to find out something about our host!”

“I…” Corrin finally speaks her mind after spending all this time unable to find her voice to protest: “I really think that’s an invasion of privacy…”

“Y-Yeah,” Daisy agrees, “I dunno if I wanna go that

far…”

“How about,” Palutena begins, walking over to Robin and taking the diary from her hands, “we read just

one

entry? Nothing else.”

Peach’s expression remains disapproving, but eventually she sighs. “Oh, alright. I’m sure if I say no you’ll keep insisting anyways.

Only

one though!”

“Only one,” Palutena confirms, smiling smugly. Around the room, everyone has a different reaction. Robin is all for it, already leaning in so she can read along with the goddess. Peach, Corrin, Zelda, and Daisy all look guilty, though the latter two are unable to hide their curiosity. Samus isn’t quite as curious as the others, but she fetches the bowl of popcorn anyways.

Jigglypuff is trying

very hard

to ignore everything going on right now, sitting silently as they scroll through social media on their tablet.

“Now, if we’re all ready…” Palutena starts flipping through pages. “Should I read the first entry? The last? Something in the middle?”

“Why don’t you find one about Smash?” Peach suggests. Zelda and Daisy are in agreement - that seems like a safe, noninvasive pick.

“Wanna find out what the host thinks about everyone?” Robin asks teasingly. Peach tuts disapprovingly and shakes her head. Daisy suddenly looks nervous. The goddess chuckles as she starts moving more towards the front of the journal.

“I’ll pick something from

before

they met us, how does that sound? If you want all the secret love confessions, you can read that yourself later.”

Palutena finally stops flipping. It’s a page rather close to the beginning of the book - the earliest page she could find the word “Smash” on. The goddess clears her throat and begins to read aloud the passage written in blue ink with their host’s handwriting:

“Day 52. Today I realized a startling truth. If all fiction is based in reality - that is, if all stories are real events that happened in other universes and parallel dimensions - then could I perhaps see a Smash Bros. tournament in person? One with the real living and breathing fighters?

“I looked into it and found countless photos and writings of those before me who attended such tournaments. I asked the neighbours and apparently it would be rather easy to attend them myself! Multiverse events are heavily interlocked with the void, so it would be simple to travel there with my own abilities. The important part is I would need an entry ticket for each event. To my surprise, my neighbours had a full set of them each, and Galeem actually gifted me their old admission tickets and said I could use them to take their place in the timestream and attend all the tournaments myself! I tried to say no of course, but they merely told me to reuse them to my heart’s content, and only to return them if I didn’t like it or I one day got tired of seeing the same show over and over again. The neighbours are far too kind to me despite knowing what I am and how I got here, I don’t know if I can ever return the favour…

“I’m truly excited, but it is a shame I won’t be able to meet my ‘ancestors’ even though they attended the same tournaments. I understand why we’re not allowed to exist in the same timeline but… I still wish I could meet them. Even just once. I have so much I want to ask… Sometimes I feel so lost and overwhelmed that I don’t know what to do with myself. I hope that feeling fades the longer I stay here.

“...Oh, I just started thinking about the Smash tournament again!! Eeek! I LOVED those games growing up, I honestly can’t imagine what it’ll be like to see them in real life!! I can’t believe this will be the first thing I leave this realm for ever since inheriting it! I’m so nervous but I’m excited too! I can’t decide if I want to go RIGHT NOW or if I want to sleep on it so I can be fully rested!!

“(I couldn’t sleep. I’m going now!!!)

“...and that’s it.”

A silence blankets the room. Everyone is taking the time to soak up what they just heard. Surprisingly, the first person to break the silence is… Samus.

“Okay, I honestly didn’t really care before but NOW I’m interested.” A big grin is stretched across the bounty hunter’s face. About halfway through the reading, she had sat up straighter and put her full attention towards listening to this. She almost forgot about the popcorn in her hands at one point. “I didn’t think I could have more questions than answers, but--”

“We HAVE to know what they thought of the tournaments!” Robin yoinks the diary out of Palutena’s hand with an eager grin. She flips to the very next page. “Day 57--”

“JigglyPUFF!”

‘That’s ENOUGH!’

Jigglypuff suddenly leaps into the air and slaps the book out of Robin’s hands. The tactician is visibly startled by the outburst, silent and wide-eyed as the balloon Pokemon angrily picks up the diary and glares at everyone in the room.

‘Have you no shame? No guilt? I feel SICK for letting all that happen before my very eyes! This is FAR MORE than what I wanted to learn about our host today. Looking around at things in plain sight is one thing, but there is nothing more sacred than a diary! You read your single entry, and now it is time to put it back where you found it.’

Jigglypuff holds the book out to Robin, gaze stern. The silver-haired woman lets a lopsided smile slip as she takes the book, betraying just how much guilt she actually felt.

“Yeah yeah, my bad. Got a little too excited.” She puts it back in the drawer she found it in.

“Jigglypuff is right, we shouldn’t have done that,” Peach says, looking incredibly guilty. She hates to admit it, but she got rather invested in the journal entry as well. “Let’s all agree to never mention any of the things we heard today to the host, alright? We weren’t given permission to learn any of this, and I don’t want to make them upset.”

Zelda and Corrin agree easily. Samus, Palutena, and Robin are more nonchalant about it, but they agree as well. Daisy says nothing, lost in thought. Jigglypuff starts glaring directly at her, and Peach clears her throat to get the Sarasaland princess’ attention.

“Huh? Oh yeah, I won’t tell. Promise.” Her voice comes out lacking her usual enthusiasm. There’s something on her mind but… Peach doesn’t want to dwell on this matter further, so she accepts the promise as-is. Looking around the room at everyone, Zelda forces a smile before she begins to speak.

“Aaaanyways, why don’t we put all this behind us and go back to prank calls?” she suggests, trying to lighten the mood. “It’s still my turn.”

“Gonna try the stripper one again?” Samus asks, smiling easily. Seeing that makes it easier for Zelda’s to be more genuine, and the Hyrulean princess sits back down in front of the phone.

“Not quite. Remember that guy the host called? I was going to call him and tell them I’m the host’s girlfriend.”

Samus is already snickering at the idea, and Daisy gasps to hear the word “girlfriend”. Palutena and Robin are

hella

interested, but Peach is understandably apprehensive.

“Zelda…”

“Don’t worry, if he starts saying anything too personal or revealing about them, I’ll hang up

immediately.

Promise.” Zelda shrugs, a glint in her eye. “It’s just that our host didn’t seem to like him very much and didn’t want him trying to contact them in whatever time period they’re in, so I was just gonna… threaten him a little bit.”

It’s not much, but it’s Zelda’s way of making up for her part of the

snooping

that was done tonight.

“That’s so CLEVER!” Daisy exclaims, thankfully starting to regain her usual cheer. “I wish I thought of that!!”

“You just want to pretend you two are dating,” Robin says with a sly look. Daisy grins unabashedly, and doesn’t say anything to confirm or deny that.

“Do you… remember the number?” Corrin asks. Zelda nods.

“Yeah, I accidentally came up with a jingle for it in my head. It’s a phone number that just

flows,

you know?”

Before Zelda starts dialing, she looks to Peach for consent. The pink princess still looks uneasy about the whole thing, but after a moment she finally sighs and offers a weak smile.

“As long as you promise not to trick him into giving you information about the host…”

She nods, smiling back. “I swear on my father’s grave.”

‘I will consent to this plan as well,’

Jigglypuff says, still looking a little grumpy.

‘However! If you go back on your word, I WILL tell the host everything that just happened here!’

“Don’t be a sniiiitch,” Robin whines, and receives a dark glare in response. Zelda just shakes her head and smiles.

“Don’t worry, I’m thinking no such thing. You can hold the receiver yourself if you don’t trust me.”

“C’monnn, enough already!” Palutena urges. “We all promise to be good little girls from now on! Let’s dunk on this loser alreadyyy!”

Zelda laughs as she starts dialing the number, humming the tune she came up with to remember what numbers to push. While their host’s secret past lingers on her mind, she puts those thoughts aside for now. Even though it feels like she only needs a few more pieces to complete the puzzle, she’s decided to no longer pry in this place where she doesn’t belong. Perhaps one day their host will reveal everything to her, but for now…

Click.

...For now, it’s time for

the most incredible prank call in the history of the multiverse.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“C’mon, let’s go too!” Peach says, determined to help their friends. Mega Man nods and they both hop onto Rush who lifts them up to the portal. Just before the two of them can jump in however, a very blocky spider leaps out and startles them.“Eek!” Both of them fall off the robot dog in shock, harshly landing on the Battlefield below. Mega Man gets up first, blasting shots at the strange spider until it explodes into small green orbs. The robot boy absorbs them into his body. Peach shakes off the pain of the fall and looks up at the rift… and gasps.“Oh no! Look!” She points up at the rift, where it is glitching the heck out, its form fluctuating wildly. Soon after it starts doing this, it dissipates completely. It does not reappear.“What do we do now? Mario and the others are trapped in there!”“What just HAPPENED to my client?!” Mosley - Cloud’s Moogle manager - flies over, clearly enraged. “Where is he?? I demand answers!!”A few minutes later, the three of them still haven’t figured out how to get their friends/client back. Thankfully, backup arrives.“Hey everybody, we’re ready to spar!” shouts Fox as he approaches the battlefield. Link, Zelda, and Marth are with him. “...huh. Thought we were late, but I guess we’re the first ones here?”“Everybody!” Peach rushes over, her concerned expression immediately revealing to the others something is wrong. “Something terrible has happened!”She explains the situation - about how Mario, Sonic, Cloud, Pichu, and their Host vanished into some sort of hole in the sky and didn’t return before the hole closed.Link gasps in shock. The other three look similarly worried.“That’s not good,” Zelda agrees, instinctively looking up in the sky for any sign of the hole. “What else do you know, Peach? Where did it come from? What did it look like?”“Ummm…” Peach frowns, having trouble explaining this phenomenon she barely even understood herself. “It was dark and swirly, like I was looking into the Void… Oh! The Host said something about it… they said it didn’t lead to the Void and they called it a ‘rift’. And that it probably appeared because of another world bumping into this one.”“So… they’re probably in another world right now,” Zelda deduces. Marth’s hand hovers over the hilt of his sheathed sword, as if he needs his weapon to ground him through his growing anxiousness.“Do you know what world that could be? Or if there is a way we could find out?”Mega Man points at where he destroyed the spider. Peach nods.“Yes, there was this… big spider that jumped out! It was made of cubes. Does that world sound familiar to anyone?”Nobody knows. Fed up, Mosley huffs and starts waddling back to the mansion. “I’m going to tell Master Hand!! HE’LL get this sorted out!”“No!” Fox grabs Mosley, lifting him off the ground. “He always gets mad when we go anywhere without telling him. He’ll flip if he hears about this.”“Rightfully so! I NEED Cloud back unharmed, kupo! Now unhand me at once!”“Did somebody say HAND???” Suddenly, Crazy Hand descends from the sky. Thunderous applause and a game show-esque jingle rings out through the air, but no one can tell where these sounds are coming from. The Smashers look away awkwardly, trying to be as unsuspicious as possible. “Fantastic timing, Crazy!” Mosley says. “There’s an emergency! Contact your brother immediately, Cloud has-- mmph!” Fox covers the Moogle’s mouth to stop him from revealing anything further. Crazy Hand arches a finger in interest.“Ohohoho! Cloud has mmphed? Interesting, interesting… I shall tell my brother right away!”“No!” Marth shouts before Crazy can fly off. The giant hand freezes in the air. “You mustn’t do that!”“Ohohoho? And why not, my dear smashing Smashers?”“Because… because…”“It’s simply not that important,” Peach quickly fills in. “Your brother is very busy preparing for the tournament, right? We shouldn’t bother him over something like this!”“Why not? My brother LOVES when I bother him when he’s doing important stuff! He’s always so happy about it that he starts yelling!”Everyone struggles to come up with another excuse when handed Crazy’s backward logic. Mosley struggles in Fox’s arms. Crazy Hand slowly turns to “face” the others, floating in close.“Don’t tell me… Cloud isn’t actually mmphing right now, is he? That’s just a LIE so we can keep SECRETS from my brother, isn’t it?”“Oh, no, of course not.”“You’ve got that all wrong!”“No lies here!”“Oh.” Crazy Hand backs off. “That’s a shame. I LOVE keeping secrets from my brother - ESPECIALLY ones he isn’t supposed to know about. I was really excited to be part of some hilarious antics to prevent him from finding out about anything.”Crazy Hand floats there, as if waiting for something. The Smashers look at each other.“...Do we tell him?” Fox asks.“I… I’m not sure we have much of a choice,” Marth says, audibly uneasy regardless.“Maybe he’ll be able to help us,” Peach points out hopefully.Link nods in agreement. Zelda looks up at Crazy Hand to speak for the group.“Alright Crazy, we’ll let you in on the awesome secret. Do your best to make sure Master Hand doesn’t find out, okay?”“Yesssssss!” Crazy Hand does a fist pump. “I am ready to hear the epic secret that I can’t tell my brother!!”The Smashers quickly explain the situation to Crazy Hand. He bobs his hand in understanding.“A secret rescue mission?! Oh boy! I’m so excited to secretly help out! Heheheh, and then The Host will surely fall in love with me once they find out I’m the one who saved them…!”Marth blinks, not sure what he just heard. “...I’m sorry, what was that last part?”“I will take care of this little man!” Without answering the question, Crazy Hand yoinks Mosley out of Fox’s arms. The helpless Moogle starts ranting angrily at how he’s being treated. “I shall put him in my Crazy Maze Cave where he’ll NEVER be able to find my brother! Kekeke! Toodle-loo, my secret comrades!”And with that, Crazy Hand floats off. Before he goes too far, Zelda calls after him.“Wait! Crazy, do you know of any worlds where spiders are made of cubes?”The giant hand spins around with a flourish, the poor Moogle being jostled around in his grasp. “Cubes?! That sounds like my FAVOURITE video game, Minecraft! But, heh, that’s just a video game - there’s no way Minecraft is real and out there.”“I see… thanks for your help.”Crazy Hand finally departs for good, taking Mosley with him. Zelda, Fox, Peach, Link, Marth, and Mega Man are left pondering what to do next.“...Let’s find people who know a lot about travelling between worlds,” Zelda finally suggests. “Meanwhile, I’ll go to the library and see if I can find any books that can help us.”“But there are so many books there!” Peach says. “Surely you can’t go through them all on your own?”“Don’t worry, I’m sure a couple of nerds will be there to help me out. ...If not and you see them around, be sure to send them my way!”“Alright, we got a plan!” Fox claps his hands together. “Let’s go, team!”They perform a cheesy team cheer before heading off in separate directions. Zelda throws open the doors to the library, her face fierce with determination. She has to find some books that can help the others return home! While the Hylian princess has been in here numerous times for her own studies and entertainment, she certainly doesn’t spend as much time in here as certain other Smashers. So she’s glad when she finds two such characters after a few minutes of combing the aisles.“Shulk! Robin!” She hurries over upon spotting the boys, who are holding their own little book club over by the science fiction section. They both greet her warmly.“Afternoon, Zelda.” Robin greets. “I thought you weren’t coming by today?”“I didn’t plan to, but something came up. During our training, some rift to another world opened up and a few of our friends fell in. Have you two come across any books that might help us open portals to unknown worlds?”“I know of a few,” Robin answers. The tactician quickly leads her - with Shulk following along - to a different part of the library and starts pulling seemingly random books off the shelves. “I’m not sure how much help these all will be - or if any of the methods described in these tomes will even work.”Zelda, holding a stack of books in her arms, shifts her weight and smiles. “Oh trust me: it’s better than anything we’ve been able to accomplish thus far. One of these is bound to work.”With both boys fully intending to help out on this daring rescue mission, Shulk takes a stack of books as well. Robin starts grabbing more that he intends to carry himself, speaking as he does so: “I’m sure you’re right. I’ll go with you and help you perform the rituals. I’m sure that’ll be faster than you combing through these books on your own.”“That would be a great help! Thank you.”As the three of them start to leave the library with all the books, Shulk asks: “So who ended up in this other world?”“Oh right,” Robin says, “that’ll be important information if we want some of these to work.”Zelda relays the list: Mario, Sonic, Cloud, Pichu, and the Host.“Oh dear… I suppose Master Hand would be worried to hear that.”Zelda laughs. “Yeah, we thought so too! That’s why we’re going to figure this out on our own before he finds out. ...Robin? Is something wrong?”Upon noticing the tactician isn’t following them anymore, Zelda turns around to see Robin standing completely still a few feet back. There’s an unreadable expression on his face.When he doesn’t answer, Shulk prompts again: “Robin?”“Hm? Oh, sorry. I just remembered there’s something I have to do, so I won’t be able to help you after all. Here, I’ll mark the relevant pages so you know where to look--”Before Zelda or Shulk can respond, Robin puts the stack of books down and briskly walks back into the depths of the library. The remaining duo look at each other in confusion.“What was that about?” Zelda asks. Shulk shrugs.“I’m honestly not sure. He didn’t seem to be in a rush to do anything before you got here.”How strange… Just a moment ago, Robin had been the normal amount of concerned and helpful for someone who just heard their friends were trapped in an unknown world. But now there’s apparently something more urgent than that? Curious.“To be fair,” Zelda retorts with a cheeky smile, “you’re not exactly the most observant when it comes to people’s feelings, Shulk. Maybe you just didn’t notice.”“I… ...maybe.”A few minutes later, Robin rushes back with a stack of sticky notes. It takes him about two minutes to blitz through every book, flipping pages until reaching the relevant passage so he may mark it. Zelda tries to press him about whatever “urgent” business he seems to have, but he dodges the question by simply saying things like “it’s not that important” and “it’s just something personal”.Hmmmmm…“Good luck,” Robin says curtly after helping stack the books in Shulk and Zelda’s arms again. He offers a tight smile as he patiently waits for the two to exit the library.Once they are out, the ornate double doors shut behind them.“...There’s something going on with him,” Zelda says aloud. Shulk blinks, confused.“Do you really think so? I can’t see why…”“That’s okay. It’s endearing how oblivious you can be sometimes.”“...What??”Zelda just laughs as she - with a mountain of books and a new party member in tow - sets off to meet back up with the others.When Zelda returns to the battlefield, she’s… rather shocked to see just how many people are here now.“I thought you guys were just looking for people you thought could deal in portal stuff?” Zelda asks Link once she’s near. Shulk puts down the stack of books onto the ground and sighs, relieved to have the weight out of his arms. Link starts to explain, gesturing to each person as he mentions them.So Fox went to get Falco, Samus, Olimar, Kirby, and Captain Falcon, because they all know about space travel and wormholes and stuff. Samus was testing weapons in the courtyard with the Inklings, Donkey Kong, and Diddy Kong, and Captain Falcon was telling Luigi and Ike about how cool he was, so they all tagged along when they heard the news. Peach told Palutena in hopes that her goddess powers would help, but she also told Daisy and Corrin, and apparently Bowser overheard them, so that’s why he’s here. Mega Man found Pit, and the two of them tracked down Ness, Lucas, and Lucario because of their knowledge of teleportation - and then went to see Richter, who was training with the Wii Fit Trainers so that’s why they’re here. Meanwhile Marth found Robin because she’s like, a genius and knows about dark magic, and she brought along Lucina, who had been playing a board game with the Ice Climbers and Isabelle, who were all worried and wanted to come help. He also asked R.O.B. and Mr. Game & Watch if they could help, since they work closely with Master Hand and might know some portal stuff. Oh don’t worry, they promised not to tell him anything! Finally, Link himself asked Dark Pit to come, because he couldn’t find Pit or Palutena, and then he also asked Red and Leaf because they’re Pokemon experts and Pokemon can teleport!“...And?” Zelda finally prompts after that explanation. “What about the rest of them?” She gestures to Roy, Villager, Greninja, Snake, Yoshi, Jigglypuff, and the Miis.Link shrugs. ‘Huh,’ Zelda thinks, ‘I guess news travels fast?’ It's a relief though, since it shows how much the Smashers care about each other if they're willing to come running when a few of them go missing.We’re sure that you, the reader, already know the cast thanks to that explanation as well as the gift of prophecy you possess, but we will stop everything and list all the characters present in this scene for convenience anyways.Peach, Mega Man, Marth, Link, Bowser, Daisy, Fox, Falco, Zelda, Luigi, Samus, Lucina, fem!Robin, fem!Corrin, Captain Falcon, Isabelle, Shulk, Roy, Pit, Palutena, Dark Pit, Ness, Lucas, the Ice Climbers, Ike, Lucario, R.O.B., Mr. Game & Watch, Villager, both Wii Fit Trainers, Greninja, Snake, both Inklings, Kirby, Olimar, DK, Diddy, Yoshi, Red, Leaf, Richter, Jigglypuff, and finally, about ten different Miis. As a wise person once said: almost everyone is here.“Zel!” Daisy rushes over, her face serious. “Peachy said you were getting books that would help us get everyone back?”Zelda nods, placing her stack of books onto the ground beside the books Shulk carried. “Yes, they’re right here. The pages we need to look at should all be marked.”Daisy and Link each grab one from the pile, and Zelda follows suit. They all proceed to flip to the pages that Robin helpfully tabbed for them and scan the pages for information. Rituals, summonings, general information about gateways between worlds… No two books contain the same information.This... might take awhile.
Meanwhile:
Jigglypuff is looking around frantically. She overheard that Cloud Strife had disappeared! This is truly a TRAVESTY! Just this morning the legendary swordsman had arrived at the mansion, and he’s already found himself in great peril! Something must be done about this....Why is everyone just standing around???
Meanwhile:
“Y’know it would be GREAT if Mario was gone like this when I’m trying to conquer the kingdom,” Bowser rants, “but this is SMASH BROTHERS!! He needs to be here so I can BEAT THE TAR OUT OF HIM!!”‘You aren’t worried about the others…?’ Corrin thinks to herself, but doesn't dare say it aloud.“W-Well, at least you’re here to help,” Richter says, somewhat amused.“Bowser.” F!Wii Fit Trainer puts a hand on the Koopa’s arm. “You’re stressed out. Take a few deep breaths to calm down.”Bowser does so, taking one big breath and then slowly exhaling. A small stream of fire exits his mouth as he does so.“Better?”“Uh-huh…” Bowser sighs. He won’t say it out loud, but he’ll be upset if something happens to the Host out there. ...It would SUCK if they had to get a new one, and they’re a loser like the last one was!!!
Meanwhile:
“So here’s what I came up with:” Fox explains to the space travelers he gathered, “I’m sure we’ve all come across wormholes in space at least once, right? What if we travel through one to reach where the others are?”Samus arches a brow and crosses her arms. “I’m not sure wormholes work the same way in my world than they do yours.” “They don’t work like that where we’re from either!” Falco groans, rolling his eyes. “Last I checked Fox, there aren’t any wormholes to use here! Not to mention, you can’t just go wherever you want with them.”“But! Maybe we can open up the hole they went through like how we access Warp Zones! Maybe there’s just some kind of trigger--”“Great idea! If I drive really fast, I’ll break the sound barrier and reach where the Host and the others are!” Without waiting for a response, Captain Falcon books it to the Blue Falcon, hops in, and starts speeding across the field. Kirby cheers him on.“...I’m sorry everyone,” Olimar says, “but I don’t think my ship can go that fast.”“That’s fine,” Fox assures him, "we can leave that idea to Falcon. The rest of us can try something else.”
Meanwhile:
“Maaaan,” Yoshi grumbles, patting his belly in hunger. “I thought everyone was out here because there was food… This other stuff is way over my head…” Red sits down next to the green dinosaur, having nothing to contribute to the whirlwind of conversations.
Meanwhile: 
“Alright this is getting ridiculous.” Snake emerges from his cardboard box and approaches R.O.B., kneeling down to be closer to the robot’s level. “Buddy, what do you have for me?”Without waiting for a response, Snake plugs a device into a hidden USB port on R.O.B.’s body. The robot is not happy, but does not resist.“Damn man! After thirty years, someone added USB compatibility but didn’t add any other features? Not even an upgrade to your recording functions? Unbelievable…”
Meanwhile:
“Shulk!” The blond boy lifts his head from the book to see Lucina’s mother approaching him. “I suppose you weren’t with the look-a-like today?”“No, I was. He said he was busy though, so he could only help us find the books.”“...Busy?” Robin asks, disbelievingly. Asking no further questions, she grabs a few books and flips to the marked pages, scanning them in a matter of seconds.“Okay. I want you guys to start sending people to find the things we need for some of these rituals. When in doubt: start with lots and lots of salt and lots and lots of candles.”“What will you be doing?” Zelda asks.“Gonna drag that shut-in out here. These types of rituals work best when you have a bunch of people fluent in ominous dead languages reciting them. Library?”“What?” Shulk takes a moment to catch on. “Oh, yeah, he’s in the library.”Robin grins and waves as she rushes back to the mansion. Meanwhile, Zelda and co. examine the books a bit more before regrouping with Fox, Marth, and Peach to start putting a plan into action. Fox climbs up onto the spectators’ bleachers to address the Smashers that have gathered here today.“Alright everyone! Here’s what we’re going to do…”Robin throws open the doors to the library, her face fierce with determination. It doesn't take her long to think about where she is going - immediately the tactician makes a beeline for where her counterpart likes to hang out. Within about a minute, she has passed by the endless sea of shelves and finds the other Robin tucked down a particular aisle, his head in a book. She knows him oh so very well. They are the same person after all."You've been awfully antisocial lately," she teases as she approaches. The other Robin looks up from his book and sighs."I don't think I've been much different than I usually am." He smiles - it's a warm smile that would probably fool most people. But Robin knows better than that. She knows herself after all."We used to be really into the multiverse thing, weren't we?" Robin smiles, leaning against a bookcase as she reminisces about the previous tournament season. "Learning about future technology, visiting all the different worlds… The two of us became quite the menace."Shutting his book, Robin chuckles, giving his counterpart his full attention. "It's a shame hacking into top secret databases and tampering with security cameras isn't a skill that can help us back home.""Yeeeaah…" She smiles at the memories. "Y'know we can still do that stuff this year. I'd love to join forces with you again.""I'd enjoy that as well." His words are genuine, but tentative. Like he knows what's coming."I'm glad to hear that. Why don't we start right now and use some crazy forbidden dark magic to get our friends back?"Robin rolls his eyes and opens the book back up, pretending to start reading again. "I knew it."She swipes the book in one swift movement and hides it behind her back. "C'monnn! It'll be fun! You know how this stuff works - sometimes you save your friends from the Void, and sometimes you accidentally summon a higher demon god! The fun of it is you never know for sure what you're going to get."Robin sighs, turning to lean his back against a shelf and looking up at the ceiling. "And sometimes if you're lucky, you get both results at the same time.""Exactly! Doesn't that sound FUN?"Yeah... Robin knows her counterpart VERY well.With just that one answer, she understands almost everything about his recent behaviour. Avoiding social gatherings, refusing to help with this rescue mission… "Wow, if I didn't know any better, I'd think you have something against the guys we're trying to help," she says slyly, testing the waters. As expected, he doesn't falter. He knows that she's smart enough to catch on to the real reason he's been acting like this. And despite that... he remains stubborn.“Ridiculous,” Robin scoffs. “Even if I did, I wouldn’t be that petty.” ‘I’m you, so why are you pretending I don’t know how you think?’ Robin thinks wryly. Given the right circumstances, she would absolutely do something petty like this to get back at someone. Now of course the question becomes: what is it that offended Robin so much…? “Hmm, I wonder who it could be~?” she continues, pretending she’s totally in the dark about this conundrum.“Stop.”Truly, it does not take a genius to figure out who he is directing his ire towards. Robin’s been acting strange around this person ever since she tried to introduce them to each other. “Well it certainly can’t be Mario,” the tactician begins, running down the list as if she didn’t know the answer already. She's even pointing at her fingers, lowering one every time she eliminates one of the five from her deduction. “Everyone loves him. Truly there’s not a single reason to dislike him. And it can’t be Pichu either - they’re just a baby! Not to mention, this is the first year we’re meeting them.”Robin sighs and shakes his head, but says nothing to stop her deduction.“Sonic can be a little rude and impatient sometimes, but he’s not a bad guy. And Cloud lines up with your vibes too much for you to hate him. You both seem moody, but on the inside you’re both big softies.”Robin hums in acknowledgement, as if waiting for her to get to the point.“That just leaves… no way! You don’t like our Host, Robin?? I’m shocked!”Fully anticipating this conclusion, Robin gives his counterpart a deadpan. “Repeating myself: ridiculous. What possible reason would I have to dislike them? I hardly know them... not to mention everyone else likes them.”“How everyone else feels has nothing to do with how you feel. You’re dodging the question.”Robin says nothing, simply staring at Robin with a slightly annoyed look. Robin flashes an amused smile in response. The two of them remain like this for a bit, waiting for the other to budge.Finally, Robin opens her mouth:“You’ve fallen in love with the Host and you are simply having a terrible time expressing your feelings right now.”Robin furrows his brow, visibly disgusted. “You’re kidding.”“I am! I know you’re not THAT bad at expressing yourself. Besides, I know you only have eyes for one person.”Robin shuffles awkwardly, his face conflicted upon thinking about said person. His counterpart can’t help but giggle at the reaction… though she notices there’s definitely something different about his expression today. Usually he becomes fond when that person comes up in conversation, but today he seems more agitated to be reminded of them.“...Listen. You may as well tell me what’s on your mind.” Robin puts a gentle hand on the other Robin’s shoulder. “We have a lot in common, don’t we? Maybe I’ll understand. I usually do.”Upon meeting each other for the first time in the previous tournament, the two of them formed a bond thicker than blood. They’ve confided in each other about so many things - perhaps more than either of them have confided in anyone in their individual lives. They know secrets about each other that no one else does. It helps that they don't have to say a word about most of them - they share so many thoughts and experiences after all.Robin doesn’t respond. He stares at a spot on the bookshelf across from him, lost in thought. Some untold memory is clearly eating at him.“I’m not sure you’ll understand this one,” he says finally. “It’s not something you had to go through.”The tactician would like to respond with “try me” but, well… he’s probably right. She has no idea what’s plaguing him so fiercely that he seems to be holding a grudge over someone he met not too long ago, but… they know each other’s lives. If he says it’s something she has no experience with, then it must be true. “Alright.” Robin pulls the book she stole earlier from behind her back and holds it out to him. “If you don’t want to talk about it, then I won’t force you.”Robin sighs, relieved, and reaches to take the book back. “Thank you--”“But!” And she yanks the book away, holding it out of his reach. “I still want you to come help us!”Robin furrows his brow yet again. “How many times do I have to tell you ‘no’...?”“If you continue to refuse to come with me, then I’ll tell everyone how much you hate our Host. Maybe I’ll make up some crazy reason that makes you seem irrational too!”“...Is that supposed to be a threat?”“I think a more accurate term would be blackmail.”He sighs. “Sorry, but I don’t care if people know I don’t like them.”“So you admit it!” Robin beams at this small victory. “Maybe you don’t care, but have you seen the way some of the people here look at them? I’m sure you’ll get a few unhappy campers harassing you about it. You know no one in this place can resist a secret once they know one exists. It might put a target on your back during the tournament too.”Robin shuts his eyes and puts a hand to his head. “You’re not going to leave me alone, are you?”“You know me so well.”Finally relenting, Robin lets out a dramatic sigh and begins walking. “We’re supposed to be the same person, but you’re so…” He vaguely gestures to the woman walking next to him. “Is this what happens when one gets married? You become deranged and obstinate?”“Don’t act like you’re any different! I know for a fact if our situations were reversed, you would be acting exactly how I am.”Finally, she receives a small smile. “...Perhaps.”The two of them make their way back outside to rejoin everyone.We return to the exact moment where the earlier scene cut so we may hear Fox explain the plan.“So we’ve come up with a bunch of ideas and have decided we’re going to split into three groups. Anyone with an aircraft is with me - we’re going to be trying to reopen the hole that Mario and the others fell through. Group two is going to try and make a new warp hole on the Battlefield - Zelda is going to brief you on how to do that. Finally, group three is going to report to Peach and she’s going to tell you some supplies that we need from the mansion to do some of the crazy things in these books. If anyone has their own ideas, feel free to have at it. The more things we try, the better chance there is of something working.”“That’s not how probability works,” Samus says to herself, chuckling.One of the Miis dramatically steps forward and salutes to Fox. “We will commence the ritual to summon the hamburger!”All ten Miis run off to the pentagram one of them drew earlier. Tempted by the promise of food, Yoshi starts after them.
“Can you make it a veggie burger instead??”
Kirby, Villager, and Diddy Kong also join them. Donkey Kong shakes his head disapprovingly at his nephew’s priorities. Leaf almost makes her way over as well, already drooling thinking about burgers, but she snaps out of it and stays with the group.Captain Falcon is still speeding around, trying to Back-to-the-Future his way into a solution.“...Okay.” Fox brushes off this meager loss in numbers quite easily. “Everyone else, report to one of the people I mentioned! Let’s get everyone back before Master Hand gets wind of this!”“Go team!” Palutena shouts, and several others cheer as well. Everyone breaks off into the groups they want to go with, and they all simultaneously start setting their plans in motion. Let’s first check in on how Fox’s group is going to tackle “creating a wormhole”.“Alright, who do we have?” Fox asks eagerly. His expression falls when it’s just Falco, Samus, Olimar, and Bowser. “...not many of us, but that’s okay! It shouldn’t take much for this plan to work.”“No offense,” Falco starts, “but I don’t see how we could use the help of tubby and the little guy over here.”“HEY!” Bowser roars. “My airship is AWESOME!”“Oh yeah? Ever use it to fly through a Warp Zone?”“Pssh! It could - EASY. Besides, I don’t know why you’re trying to paint ME as the loser here when I wipe the floor with you in the tournament EVERY SEASON!”“What does that have to do with-- I kicked your butt at the beach the other day!”“I LITERALLY LET YOU DO THAT!!”“Sure, whatever!”“Alright you two, knock it off,” Fox interjects, literally stepping between his partner and the Koopa King before things get too heated. “I actually have an idea for how Bowser can help this work.”Falco looks flabbergasted. “You do??”“So Zelda told me a bit about her idea, and I think we can use it with ours too. While me, Falco, and Samus try to access the wormhole, we’re going to have Bowser fire cannonballs at the exact spot the hole appeared before. We can use our scanners to figure out where that is.”“Are you CRAZY?!” Falco squawks. “He’s going to shoot us out of the sky!!”“Oh, is it too scary for you?” Samus asks with a grin. “Don’t have enough confidence that you can dodge all the cannonballs?”“Yeah Falco,” Fox says, joining in as he leans into Falco’s personal space. “I thought you were an ace pilot?”Falco groans and throws his arms out, shooing the duo away from him. “I am! And I’ll prove it here and now!”Fox chuckles. “Happy to hear it. Let’s go get our ships and--”“Err… just a moment.” Olimar looks back and forth between them nervously. “What shall I be doing in the plan?”“Oh.” Fox tries to think of something, but fails. The S.S. Dolphin simply isn’t built for a mission like this. “Gonna be honest: kind of forgot you were here.”“You can be part of my crew!” Bowser announces. “I need someone to fire the cannonballs while I steer, after all! Bwhahahaha!”We fast forward to about ten minutes later. Four ships are flying through the sky. Fox and Falco are in their respective Arwings, Samus is in her Gunship, and Bowser and Olimar are in the Airship. “Falco, Samus, do you read me?”“I hear ya, Fox,” Falco responds.“Loud and clear,” Samus says through the communicator. Then, her voice goes quieter, as if she was mumbling to herself: “What the…?”“Samus? What’s happening? Did you find something?”“...It’s nothing. I’ve already started a scan of the area and I found what we’re looking for. I’m sending you guys the thermal overlay now. I’ll send it to Olimar too.”“Is that blue spot what we’re looking for?” Fox asks, pointing at the navy mark among the sea of reds even though no one else can see his gesture right now.“Must be. It’s the only irregularity above the Battlefield.”“You sure your scanners are working right?” Falco asks. “This thing says it’s pretty hot outside, and unless a heat wave came through since we’ve been up here…”“There’s nothing wrong with my ship. We can think about that later if you want, for now let’s focus on the mission. I’m sending Olimar a transmission to start blasting.”After a few more minutes of flying around, cannonballs start shooting out of Bowser’s airship. The aim… is terrible.“I’ll help guide their shots!” Fox announces. “You two be ready to enter the wormhole!”Fox starts flying around where the rift had been earlier. Three cannonballs miss the mark completely, but the fourth… it hits!Well. It hits Fox.“Sh-Shoot!” Fox’s Arwing spirals through the sky, smoke rising from it. One of the wings is broken. The entire back half is crushed. In his vain attempt to regain control, he plummets right into the spot where the rift had been, and somehow the collision tears open a hole in the air. A small, Arwing-shaped one, but a hole nonetheless. Fox’s ship then plummets to the ground.“I’m going in!” Falco announces, realizing this is his only chance. He tilts his Arwing slightly to fit into the diagonal crack and then races through, vanishing from sight. The crack seals shut as soon as he’s gone.Samus lands her ship and runs over to the Arwing wreckage. She helps Fox climb out.“Oough, that smarts,” Fox groans, unsteady on his feet. “Did it work at least?”“Looks like it. Falco got through. We just have to wait and see if he makes it back.”Little did they know, Falco would impatiently take the wrong turn in the Void and miss the exit for the Minecraft world completely. He’ll end up doing a 180 and come back through the rift he came from, his ship scraping the edge of the hole in the process, which will cause him to crash land and pass out until morning.The wormhole plan? A failure.Let’s see how the next group is doing.“So here’s the plan everybody:” Zelda announces to the group that has gathered on the Battlefield, “I read that there are instances of the spacetime continuum breaking under the force of… well, the forces of reality. Explosions that can create rifts in time, blades that can slice open a hole to another dimension… So I thought: as participants of the greatest fighting tournament in the multiverse, why don’t we do what we do best and just throw everything we have and break into another world ourselves?”Gathered here for this mission is Zelda, Mega Man, Link, Daisy, Roy, Dark Pit, Ness, Lucas, the Ice Climbers, Ike, Lucario, Mr. Game & Watch, Greninja, Snake, both Inklings, and Leaf and her Pokemon. Some of these people are visibly confused by Zelda’s explanation, but they seem to understand the message of “violence solves all problems”.“...You really think this will work?” Snake asks. Zelda shrugs.“Don’t know if you don’t try, right? From what I’ve gathered about this realm, it’s fairly unstable and little holes open up all the time from other worlds bumping into it. So all we have to do is combine our powers to create a force that’ll compare to that, right?”Snake grumbles unintelligibly under his breath, clearly unconvinced this plan will even work. Roy scratches his head, still trying to wrap his head around this spacetime continuum stuff.“Sooo… all we have to do is unleash all our strongest attacks until we make a hole to another world?”Zelda nods. “Exactly! If we all focus all our attacks on a single spot--” She gestures to a big “X” that she made on the center of the Battlefield. “--then I’m sure we’ll have enough power to do this!”“Okay, I don’t want to see anyone giving anything less than everything they got!” Daisy shouts. Various Smashers start psyching themselves up to let loose.“Oh man, I’ve always wanted an excuse to do this!” Leaf grins as she pulls off all six Poke Balls from her waist. She throws them all into the air at once, and as they all pop open to release the Pokemon inside, she shouts: “All Pokemon, GO!!!”The six Pokemon that appear are Blastoise, Eevee, Ninetails, Gengar, Clefable, and Victreebel. Although Leaf has to use Squirtle, Ivysaur, and Charizard for the tournament, she tends to keep them boxed away until it comes time to practice. She couldn’t bear to be without her beloved team for too long!With this, chaos rains down on the Battlefield. Everyone does their best to focus on the spot with the “X”, but it doesn’t take long for things to get out of hand. Well, what did you expect? It was bound to happen with this many people here. Roy and Ike put all their power into their sword strikes, slamming down onto the earth with all their might. Lucario fires aura blasts, Greninja throws water shurikens, and all of Leaf’s Pokemon throw out their respective elemental attacks while Leaf and Eevee cheer them on. Ness and Lucas alternate between their various PSI attacks while Mega Man fires energy blasts. Zelda sends out Din’s Fire. The Ice Climbers cover the ground in ice and hit it with their hammers. The Inklings shoot ink. Mr. Game & Watch is making sausages. Link and Snake are throwing out explosives, which often end up harming the Smashers. With this much chaos and friendly fire, it... may as well be a real match?“Pittoo, why aren’t you doing anything?!” Daisy sneaks up on the angel to reprimand him. Dark Pit crosses his arms.“What’s the point? It’s not like this plan is going to work. And don’t call me that!”“But maybe it will work!” Daisy counters. “Don’t you want to help the Host, Mario, and the others??”He looks away, defiant. “I don’t care. I’m only here because I was forced to be here!”“You… HYAHH!” Daisy tackles Pittoo and they start wrestling. Some of the other Smashers also seem to be getting sick of getting caught in attacks - or simply forgot why they were here in the first place - and start breaking off into their own little fights. As soon as Zelda notices this, she sighs.“Well… it was worth a shot. I hope Robin gets back soon…”Zelda’s violence plan? Yet another failure. We’re two for two now, folks. But perhaps... the final team...?Our final team consists of Peach, Marth, Palutena, Luigi, Lucina, Shulk, Corrin, Isabelle, Pit, R.O.B., both Wii Fit Trainers, Donkey Kong, Jigglypuff, Richter, and Red plus his Pokemon. While Marth and Palutena wait back at the Battlefield to oversee the delivery of supplies, Peach accompanies the rest of the group back to the mansion to collect said supplies. To start, Peach has the Smashers carrying bags of salt and boxes of candles, like Robin suggested. “Hmm… A goat’s head and goat’s blood?” Peach frowns at the words on the page. “No, I don’t like the sound of that. I think we’ll skip that one… Oh, maybe this one will work!”Richter, carrying a large bag of salt in each arm, peers over Peach’s shoulder to read the text. “What does it say, Princess?”“It seems this is a ritual to ‘summon people back into your world’… Maybe we don’t need to reopen the rift, we just need to transport Mario and the others to us!”“That sounds promising,” Corrin says, shifting the weight of the candles in her arms. “What do we need?”“Let’s see… five candles, a pentagram, a bowl filled with unknown red liquid…?” Peach looks up, thinking. “Hmm… It doesn’t help if we don’t know what the liquid is. Let’s try the next one.” She flips the page. “Oh! This one looks much easier. It just says you need some personal belongings of the person you’re trying to summon. Luigi!”Before he can fully pass by, Luigi spins on his heel to face the princess, almost dropping his armful of candles in the process. “Y-Yes Princess Peach?”“Could you find something that belongs to Mario for us? I know you have experience in that. It’s supposed to help with the ritual!”“R-Right away!” Candles and all, Luigi rushes down the hall to go seek out one of Mario’s five items hidden around the mansion.“Hmm… that just leaves Sonic, Cloud, Pichu, and the Host,” Peach ponders aloud. Jigglypuff drops everything when she hears Cloud’s name. “Did you say you need something of Cloud’s?” she asks. “Don’t worry, I’m sure I have something!!” Before anyone can question her, she’s rushing down the halls to return to her room.Okay.For some reason, we harass Red about the next one.“Red!” Lucina calls out to stop the Pokemon Trainer in the halls. He stops and looks at the swordswoman quizzically. “Since you’re a Pokemon Trainer… what do you know about Pichu? We need to find something that belongs to them.”Red is silent, his expression blank for a moment. He then takes out a Poke Ball and lets out the Pokemon inside. It’s a Raichu.“Raiiii...” Raichu yawns. “Ooh, I get it!” Pit says, suddenly joining the conversation. “Pichu turns into Raichu, right? So if we use Raichu in the ritual, maybe we can reach Pichu!!”Raichu hops into Richter’s arms, who has to drop the bags of salt to catch them. The electric mouse smiles.“Err… I suppose I’ll take this one to Marth and Miss Palutena then!” Richter announces, stepping over the bags of salt on his way out. Pit goes with him.Next: ...Sonic?“H… He likes chili dogs?” Shulk suggests. No one seems to have any better ideas.“I’ll go make some~!” Peach announces, handing off the book to the blond boy before happily skipping off. “That just leaves the Host…” Corrin mumbles.“Isn’t everything in this mansion technically theirs?” Shulk points out.“I… suppose?” Lucina shakes her head. “They told me their family used to own this mansion, however. What if… what if we end up summoning them instead…?”“...What even happened to their folks anyways?” Shulk ponders aloud. “I don’t think I’ve seen any pictures of them around the mansion, or any records of them…”“I think,” Lucina starts, solemn, “something terrible must have happened to them…”“Oh…”There is a moment of gloomy atmosphere between the three of them. “...I just thought of something,” Corrin says suddenly. “Lucina, why don’t we go to the Host’s room? Even if it’s locked, they keep so many things in the hall outside. There must be something of theirs there, right?”“You’re right!” Lucina smiles as she gives Shulk all the things she was carrying. Corin piles her stuff onto Shulk as well, and the poor boy struggles to stay standing. The two girls rush down the hall.Moments later, they reach the door that the Host led them through on the night of the sleepover. Lucina eagerly twists the knob and throws it open, but instead of being greeted by the ramp that took them upwards, there is a flight of musty stairs descending… down.“...What?” Lucina peers down into the darkness. “It… It wasn’t like this before, right? Or am I imagining things?”“No, you’re right,” Corrin confirms, just as disturbed by this change as Lucina is. “It wasn’t that long ago… how could such drastic renovations occur so quickly without anyone noticing?”“Pah. What are you fools mumbling about over there?”Frantically slamming the door shut behind them, Lucina and Corrin whirl around to see Ganondorf before them. He has a smug grin on his face.“Searching for the so-called ‘secret’ treasure hoard everyone has been whispering about? Well you found it: there are riches beyond your wildest dreams down there. Not so ‘secret’ if you ask me.”“N-No, we’re…” Lucina trails off once she registers what the King of Evil just said. She leans towards Corrin and whispers: “I have an idea. If we can’t reach the Host’s room, then maybe we can find something of theirs down there? W-We’ll bring it back later, of course…!”“Good idea,” Corrin nods. Ignoring Ganondorf, the two open the door once again and descend down the old wooden stairs. For some reason, Ganondorf follows them.“So I heard the Host and a few of the other Smashers have gone missing. How lowly of you to rob our Host of their riches while they are unable to stop you.”“We’re doing this to help them,” Corrin replies seriously, glancing up the steps behind her. “We need something of theirs to summon them back into this world.”“Oh? An interesting strategy, but I’m sure your plan will fail.”Lucina stops on the last step and turns around to look up at Ganondorf. “Why’s that?”Ganondorf chuckles darkly. “Because you whelps are too pathetic to successfully use such powerful dark magic. It’s beyond your power level.”“...Is this really dark magic?” Lucina whispers to Corrin. The white-haired swordswoman shrugs. “I think we should just ignore him and hurry back to the others.”“You’re right.” The girls finally step off of the stairs and are greeted by… piles and piles of treasure. Gold coins! Sparkling gemstones! Cursed artefacts! Wow. This really is a treasure hoard. But Ganondorf was right about it not being very ‘secret’...“I don’t think we have time to dig through all of this,” Corrin says. Lucina nods, but rushes deeper into the room anyways.“Let’s just grab a bunch of different things. Something in here has to work, right?”They proceed to do this. Ganondorf continues to loom nearby, being rude the whole time like usual.“We’re back!” Robin announces, her unwilling counterpart trailing behind her. “How goes the rescue mission?”“Plans A and B failed,” Palutena explains, gesturing to the smashed Arwing and the smoldering Battlefield respectively. Many Smashers are injured. In the distrance, the Blue Falcon suddenly explodes for seemingly no reason. “Aaaand there goes our Plan D. Looks like it all depends on you now!”“Of course it does,” M!Robin sighs. The other Robin chuckles.“Wouldn’t have it any other way. What are we working with here? Ooh, is that pentagram for me?”“It certainly is!” Palutena laughs. “We set up literally every candle we could find around it. The more the better, right? This is the most fragrant pentagram you will ever conduct a dark ritual in, mark my words.”F!Robin giggles mischievously as she approaches the pentagram. There are SO many lit candles here that it’s definitely a fire hazard. Mario’s glove, a few chili dogs, and a Richu are sitting in the middle of the pentagram.“Let me guess: we’re bringing them to us?” M!Robin asks. Peach nods and hands the book to him.“Yes! We’re still waiting on the last few items to add.” “I-I’m here!” Jigglypuff runs over with an armful of Cloud Strife memorabilia. Posters, figurines, a body pillow cover… “D-Do I just put it all in here?” F!Robin nods. “Yeah, just make sure you don’t mess up the salt outlines.”Jigglypuff puts all the stuff into the pentagram. Roy pouts.“Why does that guy get so much merchandise…?”“We’re back!” Lucina shouts. She and Corrin are carrying all sorts of treasures and artefacts. They successfully ignored Ganondorf long enough for him to grow disinterested and leave them alone. The two of them drop their gathered goods into the pentagram. Raichu puts on an expensive-looking crown.Mega Man comes over, holding Cloud’s personal towel that he had been using earlier. Peach takes it.“Oh, good idea! I’m sure this will help!” She tosses the towel into the pile. It lands on Raichu. Nobody notices how jealous Jigglypuff looks.“Alright,” M!Robin announces, reading over the described ritual in the book. There's a small smile on his face. “Now we need the blood of six of-age-or-older virgins to begin.”Palutena starts cackling and walks away. A few other Smashers look startled by this ingredient they're hearing about for the first time! F!Robin chuckles and takes the book from her counterpart. “I’m glad you made that joke before I did. Anyways, let’s just get this over with so you can go back to hiding in the library like a weenie.”Both Robins stand in front of the pentagram and, once they’re sure everything is ready, begin chanting in a foreign language. The pentagram lights up. Raichu starts looking around frantically, suddenly regretting going along with this. The ground starts shaking and all the items in the pentagram start to float. When the chant ends, all the candles snuff out and a massive demon emerges from the glowing pentagram. Raichu screams in fear atop its head.“YEAHHH!” F!Robin cheers, throwing her arms up in victory. “We’re in the demon timeline, babyy! We still got it!” She holds her hand out for a high five, and the other Robin chuckles with growing enthusiasm before slapping his hand against hers. He's glad he came out here after all. “Wh-What is this??” Jigglypuff asks. “Where is Cloud?! What have you done to him!!” The balloon Pokemon angrily runs towards the demon. It hits her and sends her flying across the realm like a baseball.The remaining Smashers spend the rest of the day fighting back this horrible demon. By the time they beat it and finish the preparations to try the ritual again, the old rift opens up above the Battlefield and out come their five missing friends.Plan C… success? I guess?After all the fun is over and most of the mansion has gone to bed, Crazy Hand is in the study, telling his brother about the events of the day.“...so then they crashed the plane, right? And then there was a big scary demon like raaaah and everyone thought the others were trapped inside it, so they vanquished it but of course everyone wasn't in it so they were like 'oh noooo what if Mario was the demon all along and we just sent him back to Hell nooooo'. Meanwhile I was doing my part in this super secret plan, keeping Mosley in my dastardly maze. He thought he reached the end, but it was the TRAP EXIT, where I was there waiting for him to place a HEX on him so he couldn’t snitch to you about everyone going missing! And then I--”“Crazy. What,” Master Hand puts down his pen to give Crazy Hand his full attention. “did I tell you about placing hexes on people?”“Do it all the time so no one can say no to joining Smash! And do it so no one can snitch to the hotshot bigwigs about all the cuh-raaaazy things that go on here! I remember! Yup yup!”Slowly, Master Hand turns his chair away and says nothing more, allowing Crazy Hand to continue recounting his day.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“So my uncle takes out the eggs and puts them in the frying pan. Without breaking them.”“Of course, makes perfect sense. That’s how cooking eggs works.”“Um… is it really? I thought you were supposed to break them?”“Shulk, we really need to work on your sarcasm detectors.”Samus and Shulk follow you out of the kitchen, the three of you carrying plates of food. You ran into them on your way to breakfast, and somehow you ended up telling them about your silly technology-inept uncle that grew up in the Amazon rainforest. “Hey, Samus! Shulk!” As you three leave the kitchen and enter the banquet hall, Zelda flags you down with a wave. She’s sitting at a long table with Fox, the Ice Climbers, Donkey Kong, Marth, and Falco on one end. On the other end is Richter, Olimar, Little Mac, Ryu, Isabelle, and Yoshi. Everyone seems to be having a good breakfast. “We have some space for you guys here!”There’s the perfect amount of space for you three. As Samus is sliding into the seat next to Falco, she says: “You guys have got to hear this story. I wanna party with our host’s uncle.”“Your uncle?” Fox looks at you, a little surprised. “Didn’t realize it til now, but I think this is the first time I’m hearing about your family.”“I as well,” Marth nods. Zelda has a smile from ear-to-ear, wholly interested in hearing about your past life.“Do tell! Go on.”You have the attention of the other Smashers sitting around you as well. The other end of the table is engaged in their own conversation. Everyone knows you’re not one to talk about your past, but this isn’t as big a deal as the others are making it out to be. Your uncle is awesome! Of course you want to tell everyone about him.“So my uncle grew up in the jungle,” you explain, restarting your story for everyone to hear. “No parents or siblings or anyone to take care of him, so he had to learn how to survive in the wild on his own.”“Like Tarzan!” Popo gasps.You nod. “Never set foot in a city or anything until he was an adult. Apparently it only took him a few months to learn language and get comfortable with the culture, but there were still… things he didn’t understand. Like how to use a stove.”Donkey Kong laughs. Even he knows how to use one.“True, and DK’s a pretty good cook,” Fox says.“Yeah!” Nana agrees. “I think DK’s food is almost as good as Peach’s!”“Whoa now, let’s not exaggerate,” Falco interjects. “I will admit, the big guy’s cooking is pretty good. But saying it’s comparable to Peach’s is crazy talk!”“Not to mention,” Samus says with a smile after finishing a strip of bacon, “DK was responsible for the spaghetti incident of ‘99.”Donkey Kong wails in despair at the reminder. You see Fox put his head in his hands as well. Zelda, Falco, Icies, and Marth all smile and chuckle, clearly aware of this event that has left you and Shulk in confusion.“The… spaghetti incident?” Shulk inquires. “What’s…?”DK frantically waves his hand dismissively, going “nothing, don’t worry about it!”. The gorilla is hiding his face as he does so, embarrassed. Before you can question it further, Zelda instead returns the conversation to where it was earlier.“So, your uncle? I don’t think you finished your story.”“Hm? Oh yeah! Yeah, he was so funny. One time I was watching a horror movie and he threw the TV out the window. It wasn’t even any of the actual scary parts that broke him, it was this part where a train was coming towards the screen! I guess he thought it was going to come out and hit us.”Everyone listening laughs. You continue.“There was this other time we were at the amusement park. We ended up getting separated, and when I finally found him he was climbing on the roller coaster tracks. He figured if he went somewhere high up, he’d be able to find us again.”“You must have had an exciting childhood with him around,” Marth says. You shrug.“I didn’t actually see him that often. He travelled the world a lot and preferred living in the jungle than being in the city. I only really saw him once or twice a year. And he didn’t have a phone or anything, so I couldn’t even call him.”“I mean from what you’ve said about him,” Fox replies, “I don’t think he’d know how to use one anyways!”“...That’s true! Now that I think about it, I don’t think I’ve ever seen him use a phone.”“Got any other crazy family members?” Samus asks, clearly eager for more wacky stories. You take a moment to think, but nothing particularly interesting comes to mind.“Nah, I think he was the weirdest one. The rest of my family was pretty… normal, I guess.”“That reminds me of Popo’s grandpa,” Nana announces suddenly. Popo looks at her questioningly.“What? Why?”“What do you mean ‘why’? You have a weird grandpa!”“How is Grandpa weird??”“Umm, for STARTERS he puts ice cubes in hot soup! That’s totally weird.”“That’s not weird at all! How else are you supposed to cool it down?!”As Nana and Popo argue, you hear Falco mumble: “That’s actually pretty smart…”“Speaking of grandpas,” Fox interjects, ignoring the squabbling pair, “remember when Cranky Kong showed up at the mansion during Melee? And wouldn’t leave?”Donkey Kong groans and rolls his eyes, mumbling something about ‘that crazy old man’. Zelda, Samus, Falco, and Marth all wear similar expressions of exasperation. From the adjacent table, Yoshi overhears the conversation and throws in his two cents.“Yoshi yoshi!” ‘I remember that - it was AWFUL. He kept asking for things and ate ALL the bananas!’ “He was so rude,” Zelda chuckles. “Even Peach got sick of him. I mean, when’s the last time you saw her get fed up with somebody?”“I don’t think I ever have,” Shulk replies, clearly having trouble imagining it. You haven’t seen it either. She’s always so polite and patient with people! “I think last I remember was… Brawl?” Falco’s gaze grows distant as he struggles to recall the memory. “Yeah, that was it. She blew her lid at Ganondorf one time. Totally shut him up, it was awesome. Uhh, why did she do that again…?”“He was arguing with Bowser again,” Samus explains, and Falco makes a face of recognition, the memory returning to him now. The blonde bounty hunter has a smile as she retells the story for the rest of you not-in-the-know, clearly moments away from cracking up. “So he was bragging about his Melee record again, right? And Bowser was like--” Samus lowers her voice to do a Bowser impression: “ ‘if you’re THAT good, then you would have won Doubles too!’. And not only did Ganondorf bring up how Luigi did all the work, but he also had the GALL to suggest that they cheated to win.”“Oh my god?” You’ve got a disbelieving smile on your face, eager to hear more. “I didn’t know he was THAT much of a sore loser! Do people get accused of cheating a lot around here?”“Cheating?!” Overhearing the conversation out of context, Isabelle gasps. “Someone is cheating?? You shouldn’t do that!”“Don’t worry, no one’s cheating here,” Zelda giggles. Isabelle breathes a sigh of relief. “Anyways, sometimes in the heat of the moment people accuse each other of cheating, but I don’t think any of us truly believe in any conspiracy theories about it. We all know Smash is a fair game.”Marth adds: “Master Hand is very strict about that sort of thing. He takes a lot of pride in running these tournaments where all the fighters have to rely on their own strength and wit to be victorious. I do not think he has ever let a match go by that had an unfair advantage to one side or the other.”Samus points at the prince in acknowledgement. “That reminds me of another great story, but let me finish this one first. So Ganondork called Luigi and Bowser cheaters, right? Peach happened to overhear this and she--”Suddenly, Samus rises from the table, putting her hands on her hips and raising her voice an octave to imitate Peach. “‘Oh Ganondorf? How about instead of whining about losing, why don’t you just simply fight better?’” Everyone at the table starts laughing, some holding it in better than others. Most of the gang tuned into the conversation right now have heard this story before (or saw it happen firsthand), but it’s a first for you, Shulk, and Isabelle.“Oooooh, that must’ve made that grumpypants sooo mad!” Isabelle giggles. Next to you, Shulk is in shock.“She… Princess Peach really said that?”“It was SO funny,” Zelda confirms between her own giggles, wiping away the tears from her eyes. “And that wasn’t even the best part,” Samus says excitedly, continuing. “So Ganondorf has this dumbstruck look on his face, like ‘I-can’t-believe-this-broad-just-said-that-to-me’ kind of look. Then he goes ‘those are some tough words for someone of your calibre, princess’. And Peach - I swear - she just looks at him and says: ‘if you’re so sure of yourself, then fight me - you won’t’.” You feel like a giddy teen who just heard the hottest gossip at school. “She did NOT say that!”Samus grins, shaking from her barely contained laughter. “She DID.”“She did,” Falco confirms. “It was the funniest thing I’ve ever seen. You should have seen the LOOK on that guy’s face!”“Did they… did they fight??” Shulk asks. “It must have been the biggest exhibition match of the season,” Marth says, answering the question while Samus - still standing - leans down to shove a forkful of food into her mouth. “Well, perhaps not to the fans. But word of the challenge spread very quickly among the rest of us, and I believe there wasn’t a single fighter who did not show up to spectate.”You try to recall any matches you may have seen back in the day that were Peach versus Ganondorf. Admittedly, more of your focus was on the tournaments than the miscellaneous exhibition matches. But had you known the sort of lore behind it…“They had Master Hand arrange a match for them right away.” Samus continues the story as soon as she swallows her food. “Peach DESTROYED him. He couldn’t get a single stock off of her! Seriously, I’ve never seen Peachy fight that seriously before, it was awesome. Every single one of us was cheering her on. After the match was over and before Ganondorf could stomp off to sulk, Peach smiled at him and was like ‘teehee, that was such a good fight! You did great out there, Ganny!’ and, oh my god, he was SO mad. He didn’t say anything because he knew he’d just get owned again so he just stormed off like a little kid.”“Wow,” you utter after the story is finally done. That’s incredible. You can’t imagine ever reducing Ganondorf to such a state - he always seems to want to have the last laugh. If there’s one thing you’ve learned today, it’s to not mess with Peach. ““GANNY?”” Having ended their argument in order to hear the end of the story, Popo and Nana gasp at the nickname. They look at each other as matching smiles creep onto their faces.“Let’s go find Ganondorf and call him that right now.” “Let’s DO IT!!”The two of them climb out of the table and rush out of the banquet hall. They run past Mr. Game & Watch along the way, bumping into him and making him spin around like a piece of paper. “...What are those two so excited about?” Richter asks from the adjacent table. Yoshi, Isabelle, and Marth start to retell the entire story for him while Samus finally sits back down.“Peach is so awesome,” the bounty hunter says to end off this topic. “Probably one of the funniest people I’ve ever met.”“Top ten funniest Smashers?” you blurt out for some reason. It's not a ranking you were ever curious about, but for some reason you were interested to know what the Smashers thought about each other. Samus sucks in a breath.“Ooooh, that’s a tough one. Peach is definitely one. And I’m on there, of course.”“DK, easy,” Fox says, and beside him the ape sheepishly rubs the back of his head.“Palutena is always really funny,” Zelda adds. “I don’t really know how, but she always catches me off guard when we talk. I always end up laughing at what she says.” She pauses to ponder for a moment. “Hmm, I’d put Mr. Game & Watch on that list as well. His is the only stand-up comedy I’ve ever laughed at.”As he’s walking by, Mr. Game & Watch hears this and freezes. He happily rings his silly little bell in gratitude before skipping happily into the kitchen. Zelda giggles.Fox crosses his arms and hums, trying to think of more people. “I mean, Ganondorf is unintentionally funny I guess? …Oh, Robin! Of course, those two are hilarious--”Samus slams the table, making you and Shulk jump. “ROBIN! I just remembered the other thing I thought about earlier. Did you guys ever hear about the time Robin asked Master Hand to rig the matches for her?”Falco chokes on his food. DK’s jaw drops and he shakes his head. Zelda and Fox start snickering.“Oh MAN that story was my first real introduction to her.” Fox puts a hand on his head, smiling fondly. “As soon as I heard about that, I knew she was going to fit right in here.”“Yo, I remember that!” From the adjacent table, Little Mac chimes in. “I was there when that happened.”Samus chuckles and picks up her fork again. “You wanna tell it then? My food’s getting cold.”Mac nods and as Samus starts mowing down on her bacon and eggs, he begins to tell the story.“That was literally my first day at Smash. So I roll up to the venue we’re all staying at - unpack my bags, meet some of the guys - and at one point I was telling Samus and Robin how I’d really like to meet with Master Hand. Y’know, the big guy is the reason I’m here after all. Figured I should say hi and thank him for inviting me to his tournament. Robin’s like ‘oh yeah actually I have something to ask him, let’s go find him right now’. So Samus takes us to his office. I say my hellos, he’s happy I can make it, yadda yadda. Then as I’m about to leave, I heard Robin say to him ‘heyyy! So what’s a girl have to do to bribe you into rigging the matches for her?’.” Donkey Kong starts laughing. Falco and Shulk gawk, though the former starts to chuckle after a bit.“Man, that girl’s crazier than I thought,” Falco says, shaking his head. Samus looks up from her food to add something to the story.“And it’s really important to note that she was like:” She leans her head so she can twirl the hair on her ponytail. “‘Um, haha. Master Hand? Can you like, rig the matches for me? Heehee.’ You really had to be there. I canNOT get across how funny it was.”“What… what did Master Hand say?” Shulk asks. Little Mac continues.“He wasn’t happy. He took her seriously and did this long lecture about how Smash is fair and honest and all that. I’m pretty sure she was in there for at least twenty minutes.”“I mean,” Fox chimes in with a grin, “obviously she managed to persuade him, because she ended up becoming the champion at the end of season!”Everyone laughs at the joke. A couple moments later, Donkey Kong gestures to the room’s entrance, speaking up as he does so:
“Well would you look at that! Look at what the cat dragged in."
You turn to see Robin herself walking past the dining tables towards the kitchen. She has her head in a book, so she doesn’t notice the rest of you yet.“Good morning Robin!” Zelda calls out, finally getting the tactician’s attention. Robin smiles and waves at everybody. “We were just talking about you.”Feigning shock, Robin puts a hand to her chest. “About me? Really?” She plops down into the free space at the table - the one made when Nana and Popo got up to leave. “Good things or bad things? I take pride in both, of course, so be honest.”“I was telling them about the time you asked Master Hand to rig the matches,” Mac explains. Robin’s grin turns manic as she remembers. “Oh yeahhh! That was funny. He didn’t think so though - I swear, that guy has no sense of humour. Anyways! Zel, look at this book I found.” She presents the book to her friend across the table, simultaneously letting the rest of you get a good look at it as well. “It’s a guide on how to hack into any 1980s machinery. They even have R.O.B. in here! I could hack R.O.B.! Isn’t that so cool??”“Uh, Robin,” Fox says. “You might want to watch where you say things like that.” He points to something behind her. The tactician turns to see R.O.B. himself standing right there, staring at her. “...Not that I would, of course! Haha, you know I’d never do that to you... right?”R.O.B. squints his robotic eyelids at her silently before continuing on to the kitchen. Robin sighs in relief.“What’s so special about finding that book?” Falco asks. “I’ve seen you mess with more modern technology than that. Surely going back a few decades would be a cinch for you, eh?”“You’d think so, but most things are digital now,” she explains, a twinkle in her eyes that betrays her excitement over the subject. “Sure I can break through firewalls and loop camera feeds, but that’s totally different from technology that I have to take apart to manipulate. And some of the interfaces are so clunky! It’s like I have to learn a whole new language just to find where data is stored.”You remember hearing Robin talk about “tampering with camera feeds” once before - back during the slumber party in your room. You weren’t given the chance to ask about it then, but… now you can! “Hey, where did you learn about hacking and all that stuff? I thought your world didn’t have much in the way of uh… electronics?”“You’re right about that,” Robin confirms before launching into her explanation: “I learned all about it last Smash, of course! Once Robin and I found out about the Internet and the Outernet, we were practically ravenous to learn everything we could about modern- and other worlds’ technology.”“Yes, you two were quite unstoppable,” Shulk says, smiling slightly before looking up to address you. “It was so bad that they convinced me to bring them to my world so they could analyze our technology.”“We figured Shulk’s world was the closest to ours,” Robin explains, shrugging, “since ether and magic are almost the same thing. Plus they hadn’t figured out television or anything complicated like that, so it seemed like a good starting point for our studies. Although… we did jump ahead a bit.”The mischievous expression on her face tells you that you’re about to hear quite the nefarious plot. “I think we told you about the host of the last Smash season, right?”“The really restrictive guy who never let you do anything fun? Yeah.”“That’s him. His name was Mr. S - or, well, that’s what he told us to call him. Don’t think we ever found out his full name? Anyways - he was soooo protective about his property. Seriously, he had cameras EVERYWHERE. So Robin and I decided we were going to have a bit of fun! We rallied up a bunch of the others who were fed up with his rules--”“Which was basically everyone,” Falco interrupts. Everyone at the table paying attention to the conversation nods, even Shulk, who you didn’t expect to be part of a plot like this. Robin continues.“--and we made a plan to break into his personal estate together. Everyone in the tournament stayed in a different building from him that was kind of structured like a hotel. Waaaay smaller than this place - we all had to share rooms and the place never saw an upgrade even as more people showed up. Anyway, initially Robin and I just wanted to snoop around - maybe take some things just to make Mr. S freak out - but once everyone got involved, it kind of became like a coup. Some of us were set on stealing any good snacks he was hoarding, some just wanted to break things. …A lot of us wanted to break things. It’s actually kind of impressive that no one ended up bringing the whole building to the ground?”“I remember a few people wanted to,” Fox says. “But we managed to get everyone to agree not to. Cuz if we did destroy the whole building, then Mr. S could penalize everyone involved. And some of us were already really hurting from unfair penalties, so we made an oath to help each other get away with things. Y’know what they say: snitches get stitches!”Your mind is trying to wrap itself around that reasoning… but it can’t. “I mean, couldn’t he still penalize you anyways? I dunno, whenever I see the penalty sheet, there’s always people on there that I didn’t expect to see… I just figured Master Hand knew everything that was going on and included it all in there?”There is a strange silence among the table, as if literally none of them had considered this before. Zelda, Fox, Samus, Shulk, Falco, DK, Robin, and Little Mac look at each other with baffled expressions. Maybe they didn’t even know the penalties worked like that. Finally, Mac laughs awkwardly and addresses you.“H-Hey man! You make it sound like you fill out those things a lot!”“Oh… not as much as you’d think - honest! Sometimes I just like looking at it before bed to get a sense of what may have happened that day when I wasn’t around. It’s not even that helpful since Master Hand uses such vague terms for everything. So obviously I’m not going to give someone a penalty if I have no idea what anything on the sheet is referring to." You pause, and the next bit tumbles out sheepishly: "…I also uh, kind of like the power I feel when I look at it.”The tension around the table lightens up slightly. Zelda leans in with a smile. “Hey, what do those sheets look like? I’ve never seen them before.”“Really?”The Hylian princess nods. Samus, finished her food, speaks up as well. “Yeah, we never get to see those things. Pretty sure Luigi’s the only one that has since, y’know, he acted as the host once.”Huh! Then again, Master Hand did tell you that the fighters don’t find out if they’ve been penalized until they enter the ring on the day of their first tournament match. It makes sense that they’d never be shown the sheet of paper. “It’s like…” How do you describe this? Would they know what you mean if you say ‘hey you know the bonuses from Melee the video game’ ? Maybe not. “Y’know what? Remind me about it another time and I’ll just show you. I’m sure there’s no rules about it or anything.”“Really??” Zelda’s eyes are practically sparkling from excitement. “Oh, that would be wonderful! I’ve been curious about this for years.” “Anyways,” you look back at Robin, who has started reading her book again. You’re super curious how the coup ended. “Robin! You didn’t finish the story! I’m guessing you hacked the cameras so everyone could get in and out undetected?”With a grin, the tactician closes the book and resumes her tale: “That’s right! Robin and I looped the feeds for every single camera in the building so none of us appeared on camera. The place was totally trashed by the end of the night.”“That guy had a lifetime supply of Oreos in there!” Samus groans and shakes her head. “Seriously, we were fighting over that stuff. Kept gambling with it and everything. And this guy was hoarding it all! So naturally, we took all the good snacks we could find.”“Did this guy seriously not have any bodyguards or anything?” you ask. Rich people are supposed to have servants, right?“No, but,” Fox explains, “there was one guy who acted like one. One of us.”“Who?”“You’re not going to believe this,” Zelda says, a smile on her face. Before you can ponder it, Samus tells you who:“Ganondorf.”“What! No way.” You didn't expect his name to come up for a second time today while everyone was reminiscing - especially for an event completely unrelated to the last one.“Yes way,” Robin replies, grinning. You look across the table to see everyone else nodding, confirming this as the unholy truth. What the heck.“I don’t know why, but Ganondorf really sucked up to Mr. S last season,” Falco explains, rolling his eyes at the thought. “He was always snitching on us for the most minor things!”“I know why he did it,” Zelda says. “It’s because Mr. S was never stingy with penalties. Everyone got at least one that season. I’m sure Ganondorf wanted to have the least penalties to help him win the tournament.”“Too bad it didn’t work~!” Robin points out in a sing-song voice.“Yeah,” Fox continues, “we all banded together to keep him out of moving on to the second round in every single tournament. As soon as we found out the brackets for the new tourney, we'd meet with whoever was fighting him and give tips if they were new. You should have seen how mad he was every time he lost.”“So anyway he was there trying to stop us that night too.” Little Mac picks up the story where Robin left off. “He was going to tell Mr. S about everyone that was there so we’d all get penalties. But there was like, forty of us and only one of him so we just tied him up and hid him in the hotel basement until the 24 hour time limit for submitting penalties was up.”Oh man… He must have been MAD about that! “So did you guys get away with it in the end?” You’re pretty sure you know the answer - of course they didn't! - but you start to doubt yourself when the Smashers around you start snickering.“Fast forward to morning,” Robin explains. “Mr. S called everyone out and demanded to know who ransacked his place. Of course, we all made a pact to cover for each other, so we all pretend we have no idea what happened. Ganondorf is still trapped in the basement at this point so he’s not there to snitch. We wanted to pin it on him, but Mr. S has given penalties to people being bystanders before, so we didn’t even try. Just as he’s yelling about going to speak with Master Hand about this… guess who shows up.”“...No! Did he cover for you??”The laughter around the table is all you need to hear to know the answer to that. Samus is the one to finish off the story: “Get this: the official story is that Ridley was angry about being left off the roster all these years, so the Space Pirates showed up and ransacked Mr. S’s place in the middle of the night. Since everyone was ‘sleeping’ and unaware of what was going on, none of us could be penalized for it.”“Wow.”At your disbelief, Donkey Kong adds: “Yeah, EVERYONE hated Mr. S. Even the big cheese!"“He must have been sick of how many penalties were coming through,” Fox theorizes. “It was the first Smash where the host was a complete stranger. Honestly with how much of a disaster that was, I’m surprised he went with another one. No offense, of course - you’re a lot cooler than Mr. S was, so I think he made the right choice this time.”That’s nice of him to say. But man… you suppose it doesn’t surprise you that Master Hand would prefer there to be fewer penalties throughout the tournament, especially after hearing how much he doesn’t condone fighters having unfair advantages. He always seems reluctant when you ask for the documents. There is an alternate universe out there where you decided to be more strict with the Smashers and they did this sequence of actions to you. As much as you wish you could control your guests more, you’re glad you don’t. Otherwise… you’re certain they would have revolted just like they did with this Mr. S. In some ways you feel bad for him, but on the other hand… he didn’t sound like a great person to get along with. You question if he was even a fan of Smash Bros. or if he was just in it for the business aspect of the whole affair. Though that does make you wonder……why did Master Hand choose you and your realm for Ultimate?Did he know of some of its unique properties beforehand? He must have, right? Maybe that along with the fact that you were a Smash fan AND the fact that you have absolutely no business background… meant you were the perfect sucker for the job. “Wait.” A curiosity occurs to you. “If me and the last guy were the only ones Master Hand didn’t already know… does that mean he was friends with Tabuu?” You recall hearing that Tabuu was the host for the Brawl season, though at that time you didn’t really have the chance to discuss it.“Tabuu?” Little Mac crosses his arms to recall that name. “That was the big blue guy from the end of the Smash Bros. movie, right? I thought he was just an actor!”“Oh no, he’s actually a very well-off businessman,” Zelda explains. “His company owns the rights to produce and maintain all sorts of inventions in the multiverse. I believe his company created the most popular brand of multiverse phone and makes a lot of the popular apps. But unlike most conglomerates, he apparently promotes excellent working conditions, prices that are affordable for the lower class, and donates almost all of his personal wealth to charity.” Falco rolls his eyes. “Ohh, the princess is criticizing the rich? Never thought I’d see the day.”Said princess just shakes her head, ignoring that comment. “He owns a huge stake in Smash even, and supposedly he buys more whenever it seems like someone else is trying to buy enough shares to gain ownership of it. I asked Master Hand about him once and it turns out they were good friends in college.”Multiverse college, huh… you wonder how similar to regular college it is. “Then of course, we all know Luigi,” Fox says, going back to the original topic of discussing Smash hosts. “Before that though, back during the first ever Smash tournament we had this guy we called Mr. King.”Donkey Kong grins and nods at the mention of him. “Yeahh, Mr. King was cool! He’s still my favourite, I miss that dude!” “He was pretty cool,” Samus agrees. “Really chill about everything - it was obvious he and Master Hand had been friends for a LONG time. Oh, did you know he’s the one who invented the cloning technology we use in Smash?”Robin perks up, looking up from the peeks she’s been stealing from her book. “Really? I never knew that technology was so… recent. In the grand scheme of the multiverse, I mean.”“Yes,” Shulk agrees. “Things are so different outside of our worlds, it’s so easy to assume things have always been like this here.”“Yeah, apparently it had just been perfected,” Samus continues. “Cloning technology as a whole has been around for awhile, but the ability to replicate people and merge the clone’s memory with the original? All while being able to alter physical traits that the clone has, like hair and skin colour? That’s what Mr. King managed to create. MH paid him so he could keep using it over the years. It’s some pretty incredible technology when you really look into it - the things we use it for in Smash hardly scratch the surface of what it’s capable of. I've seen a lot of worlds with their own take on cloning, but it's easily the most advanced example of it I've ever seen.”“Interesting…” Robin mumbles, a smile spreading across her features. You have a feeling she’s just found her next piece of technology she wants to learn about. Suddenly, she reaches across the table and grabs a strip of bacon from Falco’s plate.“Hey! Get your own food!”“The earlier bird gets the worm!” With a cheeky grin, Robin shoves the entire strip of bacon into her mouth. “Mmm! Good bacon. Who cooked breakfast this morning?”Donkey Kong points at himself, grinning proudly. You look down at your own plate of food, which you’ve only eaten about half of thanks to how engaging the conversation train has been since you’ve sat down. You stab your fork into some food and pop it in your mouth.…Huh. Everyone wasn’t joking earlier - DK is actually a pretty good cook.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“WHADDYA MEAN YOU DON’T WANT ME TO HELP WITH THE FIRE?!”Ike sighs, running a hand through his hair. “Bowser. You know why.”Like a child having a tantrum, the Koopa King stomps his foot against the ground. “MAYBE Link shouldn’t have left his bag in the way of my awesome flames!!”The swordsman shakes his head in disbelief. Luigi clears his throat and decides to share his thoughts about the situation:“M-Maybe… you should be a little more apologetic to the-a person who invited you camping…?”“Buh?!” Bowser looks shocked for a moment to hear such a suggestion, then seems to grow serious for a moment. “.......A-ANYWAYS! Leave the fire to me this time! I MEAN IT!” He turns and stomps off into the woods. Ike sighs and, after grabbing his sword and strapping it to his back, follows the giant Koopa into the forest to make sure he doesn’t do anything crazy.“I’ll help with the fire as well,” Cloud suddenly says, standing up and retrieving his own sword. “Ever since that time we were trapped in Steve’s world, I’ve been playing more Minecraft. I’m a master at making campfires now... among other things.”“Wow!” Isabelle says, getting up to follow him. “I like building campfires too! They’re so easy and making little campsites is always so fun!”The two of them head into the woods as well, their direction slightly offset from Bowser and Ike. They’ll end up meeting up with them later when Bowser inadvertently walks into a Bokoblin camp and the guard blows the horn to alert the pack.For now, that leaves Luigi, Robin, Pit, and Roy to deal with the tents. Snake was here too, but he kinda… vanished a little after the host left with Link and Marth. Oh well. He’s probably doing something important to contribute to the camping adventure.“Woohoo!” Pit cheers. “Let’s set up those tents before everyone gets back! Roy, let’s start with ours and get the BEST spot!”“Right!”As Luigi and Robin start setting up tents on the other side of the camp, Pit and Roy work on their own. They… have an incredible amount of trouble with it. So much trouble. Even with the two of them, it takes three times as long for them to set up this one tent compared to the other two, who already have five tents set up by the time they finish. “Why was that so hard…?” Roy asks no one in particular, already exhausted. Pit rushes over to where everyone’s bags are to grab someone else’s tent.“It’s okay! We know how to do it now, so this next one will be EASY.” Immediately, he sees… the host’s tent in the pile! It still hasn’t been set up yet! With a grin, Pit grabs it and returns to Roy.“Look! We can set up the host’s tent right next to ours!”Roy grins and nods in agreement, and the two of them rush to the space next to their own tent. Before they can start taking it out of the bag however… Roy pauses.“Hm? Is something wrong?”“No…” The redhead wears the face of someone who has just come up with something perhaps a little bit devious and is still deciding whether or not they want to go through with it. “...W-Well I was just thinking… what if we invite the host to stay in our tent!”Pit’s face lights up. “It’ll be like an even BIGGER sleepover!”Roy remembers when he first arrived at the mansion. When he met the host, he thought they looked like someone cool and strong, like the other fighters!! But they weren’t a fighter… Despite that, they still hung out with him at Nimbasa City, and that was a lot of fun!! They ate new food and played all sorts of games… and even though he didn’t like the rollercoaster part, it’s still a warm memory for him because the host had a really big smile the whole time and even held his hand when he was scared… and didn’t let go…...A-Anyways!! He’s still mad that he didn’t get invited to the sleepover that one time! “Hmm, but what should we do with their tent then?” Pit asks, snapping Roy out of his thoughts. “Should we still set it up? Or wait until they get back with the food so we can ask?”“But what if they say no??” Pit ponders the situation for a moment before coming up with something. “I know! If we hide their tent, then they’ll HAVE to share the tent with us! Right??”Roy smiles at the plan. “You’re right! If they can’t find it, then they’ll--”“What are you two whispering about?”Both Roy and Pit jump and whirl around to see Robin standing over them, wearing an amused smile. His smile fades once he looks down and sees the tent in their hands.“...What are you two planning to do with that?”“”Nothing!”” the two shout in unison, their nervousness betraying them. Robin glances between them, suspicious.“Nothing? Isn’t that the opposite of what you’re supposed to be doing with the tent?”“O...Oh yeah!” Roy laughs and grabs the bagged tent from Pit’s hands. “W-We’re tooootally setting up this tent! Right over here!!! Hahaha…”With an unreadable expression on his face, Robin stares at them. The boys are sure the tactician sees right through their plan! But they’re caught off guard when Robin suddenly smirks, throwing his arms around both boys’ shoulders and pulling them close in a huddle. He's a little aggressive about it though, which makes them nervous.“Do you guys really think I don’t enjoy a good prank?”Pit gulps. “H-Huh? Wh-What do you m--”“Now would be the ideal time to hide something, before anyone gets back.” Robin speaks at a low volume so as to not alert Luigi, who is busy putting up the final tent. “Here’s what I would do: go in the direction none of the others went. Keep walking until you can’t see or hear the campsite or anyone around it. Find the biggest tree, and you’re going to hide the tent in the branches of the next tallest tree behind it. That’ll probably keep anyone from spotting it before the sun goes down. ...Or you could throw it off the edge of the plateau. That would probably work even better.”“O-Oh, well, we just want to hide it,” Pit says, still nervous, “not get rid of it for good.”Robin lets go of them and shrugs. “Whatever works for you.”Roy smiles - a little confused, but relieved that their scheme wasn’t shut down. “Ah, well… thanks for the advice! Let’s go!”Him and Pit rush off into the woods. Robin chuckles and goes back to helping Luigi put the finishing touches on the last tent. When they’re done, Luigi gets up to stretch… then notices something is amiss.“Eh? Where did the other two-a go?”Robin looks around the camp, pretending to be oblivious. “Who knows? It looks like all the tents are up though, so I guess we can relax until everyone comes back.”Luigi sighs and goes to sit on a log, happy to enjoy the peace while it lasts. Robin looks to where the boys ran off, unable to stop himself from smiling before he goes to sit down himself.He’s not sure what their motives are, but anything that inconveniences that person sounds like a good idea to him.Meanwhile, Roy and Pit find the perfect tree to hide the tent in. It takes a few throws, but soon the bagged tent is stuck in the branches of the tree. The boys share a high-five before rushing back to the camp in excitement. There’s absolutely NO way this plan could go wrong for them…!When they are gone, Mewtwo peeks out from behind a tree. They stare up at the tent, and then at the backs of the retreating duo. Then back up at the tent....For some reason that cannot be pinpointed, Mewtwo wants to throw something at them.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Crickets chirp under the light of the moon, which now hangs high in the black sky. Somewhere in the forest, an owl is hooting. As the fire crackles, the Smashers have started holding their own little interactions. Marth, Bowser, and Ike are discussing the upcoming tournament, talking about past memories and their confidence for the future. Roy and Pit are playing a game together on their 3DSes. Luigi and the Host are enraptured by Cloud launching into a detailed explanation of some movie series he’s passionate about. Snake and Robin are sitting on the same log but are not interacting with each other - Robin is reading a book, meanwhile Snake is merely staring into the campfire with a fierce intensity. What a fun night it has been! But Isabelle notices there is one person who hasn’t started to enjoy the camping spirit yet…!“You’ve never roasted marshmallows before?” Isabelle assumes as she smiles up at the armoured Phazon beast beside her. Dark Samus has been staring silently into the campfire ever since she was brought into the group, making no effort to communicate or join in the festivities. Thankfully, Isabelle is here to help! “That’s okay, I’ll teach you how to do it. It’s easy!”Isabelle carefully skewers a marshmallow onto the stick and hands it to DS. The cyborg stares at it, motionless. The dog secretary takes Dark Samus’ hand and puts the stick in it, wrapping her metallic fingers around the bark.“There! Now you just put it in the fire until it’s crispy. Like this!” She demonstrates using her own stick and marshmallow. Dark Samus watches for a moment and then slowly lowers her marshmallow until it is in the flames. Isabelle smiles.A few moments later, Isabelle removes her marshmallow to reveal it’s a perfect golden brown. She happily removes it and eats it before putting a fresh ‘mallow on the stick. Dark Samus keeps hers in the fire. “Maybe she likes it burnt?” Isabelle ponders, so she doesn’t say anything. But a minute later, she sees DS’s marshmallow melting amongst the raging flames.“Oh no!” The marshmallow, engulfed in flames, melts off the stick and plops into the depths below. Dark Samus pulls the stick out. “Th-That’s okay! The timing can be pretty tough to get the hang of - let’s try again!”She puts another marshmallow on the stick for DS. They both begin roasting their marshmallows anew.Once again, Isabelle takes hers out at the perfect time. She notices that her friend isn’t making a move to do the same.“Ummm… Maybe you should check on it now!”For a moment, Dark Samus doesn’t react. Finally, she pulls the marshmallow out. It is still on fire.“Aaaahh!” Isabelle blows out the fire to reveal that the marshmallow has been burnt black. She’s disappointed to see her friend’s first marshmallow attempts go so poorly, but she quickly puts on a smile. “It’s a little overcooked… but I still think it tastes good like this! Do you want to try it?”Dark Samus says nothing. They simply stare at Isabelle.“Oh… maybe you don’t want to eat something that burnt. That’s okay, I can eat that one if you don’t want it!”Slowly, Dark Samus lowers the burnt marshmallow so it’s within Isabelle’s reach. The yellow dog smiles and peels off the burnt skin of the marshmallow, leaving the gooey uncooked inside on the stick.“There! You can try again with that part!” Isabelle puts the burnt crust in her mouth and hums in delight. The perfect marshmallow is a crispy golden brown… but sometimes it’s fun to roast it until it’s like this!!The two of them return to roasting marshmallows. Once again, Dark Samus pulls the stick out of the fire too late and it’s completely burnt. She, once again, offers it to Isabelle.“Hmm… Why don’t I eat yours and you eat mine?” Isabelle smiles as she offers her own golden-brown marshmallow to the cyborg. “It’s not fair if I get to eat all of them!”Dark Samus is motionless, staring silently at the roasted treat. Isabelle waves it tantalizingly in front of her helmet. Finally, DS slowly uses her hand to grab the marshmallow from her… then continues to stare at it, as if examining it.“Um… Are you… able to take off your helmet to eat it? I never thought about that…”Suddenly, Dark Samus brings the roasted marshmallow to her helmet and smushes it against the glass. Her entire body suddenly starts vibrating, startling Isabelle, and she pushes the marshmallow until it phases through her helmet. Once it is gone from sight, she stops vibrating.As always, she has no reaction. Nothing to say. After a few seconds, she picks up her stick and puts another marshmallow on it. Isabelle beams.The two of them roast marshmallows for each other for the rest of the night before going to bed.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“Woohoo! There’s nothing like shopping to wind down from an--” The Sarasaland princess stretches dramatically. “--INTENSE go-kart race!”

Robin chuckles, twirling a strand of her long silver hair. “You say it was intense, but I didn’t sweat too much to make it to first place.”

“Are you KIDDING?!” Daisy pouts playfully. “I was in first place the entire time up until the end! If it weren’t for that blue shell…”

It’s a sunny morning today in the Mushroom Kingdom. Currently stepping into the bustling Coconut Mall are a troupe of smiling Super Smash Brothers all-stars, composed of the aforementioned Daisy and Robin alongside Peach, Palutena, Donkey Kong, Mr. Game & Watch, Leaf, Ken, and Kirby. They’re

so

optimistic that most people probably wouldn’t be able to guess that their current lodgings - the fabled “Smash Mansion” - had been reduced to ash just last night. Temporarily relocating to another world while the repairs were being done hadn’t put a damper on any of their moods. No! It was just an opportunity to go have fun! Still full of energy despite the events of last night, a group of Smashers set out first thing to compete in a go-karting tournament. Some of their group - namely Zelda, Mega Man, and the Ice Climbers - weren’t interested in hitting up the mall, so they headed off to do their own thing after the tournament was done. Most of them are busy discussing the races while they walk through the mall seemingly aimlessly, while Leaf is looking at all the storefronts in awe.

“Wow, this place is HUGE!” She can’t help but look at all the passing customers as well, smiling at all the Toads and Piantas walking around. “Not even Celadon gets this busy.”

Kirby nods and makes an excited noise. He’s so happy and ready to explore the mall with his Smash friends! But as the group is walking towards the fountains, Kirby gasps and takes off in a sprint. He’s spotted a familiar face! Perched on the edge of one of the fountains with his cape wrapped around him… is none other than Meta Knight.

“Hello Kirby.” The warrior nods as the pink puffball greets him cheerily. “It seems I’m in the right place. Master Hand told me that everyone was staying in the Mushroom Kingdom for the time being, so I made my way here to meet with you all.”

Kirby playfully admonishes Meta Knight for showing up so late. It is at this moment that Leaf catches up with Kirby, with everyone else a few paces behind.

“Kirbs, why’d you run off like that?” Before waiting for an answer, Leaf notices Meta Knight and continues: “Woah, who’s this guy? Some kind of celebrity? He looks cool!”

“Meta Knight!” Peach exclaims in her singsong voice. Everyone except Daisy, Ken, and Leaf are greeting Meta Knight with a familiar smile. “It’s so good to see you again. Were you invited to the Smash tournament again as well?”

The masked warrior nods. “That’s right. I would have arrived sooner, but the moment I received the invitation, I set out on a journey to prove I was still the strongest warrior back in our universe.” He pauses. “I succeeded.”

Kirby and Leaf are in awe and start clapping. Robin, Peach, and Palutena chuckle while Donkey Kong rolls his eyes.

“Good to see you haven’t changed, man,”

DK says somewhat sarcastically. If Meta Knight picks up on the tone, he doesn’t comment on it.

“Sounds like you’re quite the fighter, little guy!” Ken says, holding out his hand for a handshake. “Name’s Ken. I’m looking forward to facing you in battle!”

Meta Knight looks at Ken’s hand, then up at his grinning expression, then back down to his hand. He finally releases his cape to return the handshake. “My name is Meta Knight. The feeling is mutual.”

After this, Peach formally introduces Meta Knight to Leaf and Daisy to put the entire group on the same page. Once the introductions are done, Mr. Game & Watch uses a series of beeps and boops to ask if Meta Knight would like to join them for a shopping extravaganza.

“I’ll have to decline. Now that I’ve found where everyone is, I’d like to visit our current lodgings to meet the other new fighters and judge their capabilities. Farewell.”

Meta Knight hops off the edge of the fountain and begins to walk away. Amused, Robin calls out to him: “Do you even know where we’re staying??”

He freezes in place. No he does not. Palutena chuckles, amused as well.

“By the way, you

do

know that this is Isle Delfino and not the Mushroom Kingdom, right?”

Meta Knight turns around to face everyone again. “Are they not one and the same?”

Peach shakes her head with a smile. “Not at all! Isle Delfino is an island just off the coast of the Mushroom Kingdom. We took a boat to get here… so perhaps you should stay with us until we’re ready to go back.”

“Unless you wanna fly over the ocean?” Robin suggests as a joke. Meta Knight seems to consider it seriously.

“...I suppose I’ll stay for now,” he concludes. He’s strong and very confident in all his abilities, but there’s a reason he has an airship when it comes to travelling long distances. Kirby beams at this, grabbing Meta Knight’s hand and pulling him along.

Finally, the shopping spree can BEGIN.

Cue a montage of our quirky cast trying on clothing from every store they walk by. Daisy, Peach, Robin, and Palutena look dazzling in everything they wear. Donkey Kong stops at the tuxedo store. Leaf finds some cute skirts but bawks at the price tag. She’s soon back to smiles when the older girls offer to buy them for her. Mr. Game & Watch finds a store selling 2D dresses and poses in all of them. Kirby tries on a lot of hats. Ken is everyone’s judge, giving a thumbs up at all the hottest styles. The only one who doesn’t dive into the fun is Meta Knight, who is content to watch everyone try on clothes from the sidelines. He has no interest in such frivolities. This… “fashion” thing eludes him. He doesn’t quite understand the point of it. But everyone else is enjoying themselves, so he patiently follows the Smashers through the mall.

Over an hour later, the gang stops by the food court. Everyone except Meta Knight has at least one bag in their hands. After finding a table big enough to accommodate all of them, everyone slowly disperses to stand in the lineups for different food joints. Robin notices that Leaf looks particularly distracted, gazing back towards the stores.

“Something up, kiddo?” the tactician asks. Leaf whirls around to look at the silver-haired woman with a sheepish smile.

“Oh, I just remembered I could use some new jeans!” She points at a store called Mushnotes, which has a “BUY 2 PAIRS OF JEANS GET 1 PAIR 50% OFF” sign out front. “I was wondering if I should go run in there now while it doesn’t look too busy. But I’m sooo hungry…”

Robin laughs at the Pokemon trainer’s troubled expression. “How about this: you do what you need to do and I’ll buy you your food so it’s ready when you get back?”

Leaf’s face lights up. “Really? You’d do that??”

“Sure, why not? What’s your order?”

“Ummm… a burger! Doesn’t matter where from! Thank you thank you thank youuu!”

Robin laughs as Leaf rushes out of the food court and to the Mushnotes store. Although he wouldn’t mind seeking out food for himself, Meta Knight chooses to follow the girl, curious about what is so important about these clothes that she is compelled to put off lunch for them. He wanders into the store after her, instantly beset by pop music emitting from the speakers above. To him, it sounds similar to the soundtracks that the other clothing stores had.

“Oooh, I love this song!” Leaf says to herself as she browses the wall of jeans, bopping her head and humming along. Unable to restrain his curiosity any longer, he approaches the selection of jeans and grabs a pair off the shelf, examining the material.

“I don’t understand,” he begins, looking up at the Pokemon Trainer. “These don’t look very comfortable. Are you not more mobile in the skirt you wear?”

Leaf snorts in amusement. “Haha, no. Skirts are fun and easy to wear, but sometimes it’s easier to wear pants instead.” She sighs dramatically. “My mom always told me if I’m going to wear a skirt then I should sit more like a lady, but that’s sooo much effort! I can’t do it! So that’s why pants are nice sometimes.”

Meta Knight hums in contemplation. He unfolds the jeans to take a better look. “...They look so narrow in the legs. Are these really that comfortable?”

“I mean, I don’t really like ones that are THAT skinny.” She gestures to the labels above each cubbyhole. “See, there’s different styles of jeans. Slim jeans, skinny jeans,

super

skinny jeans, bootcut, flare, boyfriend jeans…”

“What are ‘boyfriend’ jeans… Don’t tell me one must be in a relationship to wear them?”

The girl giggles as she pulls a pair off the shelf. “No, silly! It’s just the name of the style. I umm, don’t know why they’re called that! Maybe they’re supposed to fit like wearing mens’ jeans?”

“Are there different jeans for different genders…?”

“Mm-hm!” Leaf points to the other side of the store. “Over there is all the stuff for men, and this side is all for girls!”

“But why? Are you only allowed to wear what’s on this side of the store? And what of those who are neither?”

“Uh… no, you don’t

have

to wear the ones for what you are… ummm…” Leaf puts a hand to her head, thinking. “...I don’t actually know why they’re separate! I’ve never been to the men’s side of the store. I’ve always wanted to because they always have cooler tees than girls, but…” She breaks into a smile. “Y’know what, I’m gonna go over there and check it out!!”

With her current selection of jeans in tow, she rushes over to the “men’s side”. Meta Knight follows her, wanting to solve this mystery as well.

“Whoa, they’re

totally

different!” Leaf says, manhandling a random pair of jeans from the shelf. “They feel like, rougher? And LOOK! They have POCKETS!!” She excitedly shoves a hand into the pockets. Meta Knight blinks, confused.

“...Is this truly something to be excited over? The other ones seemed to have pockets as well.”

“Barely! They’re so small and useless, you can’t fit ANYTHING in them! When I was a kid, I could fit my entire Gameboy in my pocket, but now? Forget it! I can’t even put my phone in there and it’s WAY smaller than a Gameboy.”

She demonstrates with the jeans in her arms. On the “men’s” jeans, she could fit her whole fist in there, but on the “women’s” jeans… she’s right! There’s only enough space for a few fingers. That’s crazy.

“What’s the point of putting pockets on them if you can’t use them?”

“That’s what I’ve been wondering! It’s like those tiny shirt pockets - like, what am I putting in those? Some spare coins? Psshh!” She turns to look at the wall of “men’s” jeans, putting back the random pair she took off the shelf. “Hmm… I think I’m going to buy one of these too! They all look so big though - I hope they come in sizes small enough that fit me…”

As Leaf starts thumbing through the jeans, Meta Knight examines them as well. He finds some rather peculiar pairs and holds them up to show his companion.

“This can’t be sold, can it? There are holes in it.”

“Hm?” She only spares him a glance, distracted. “Oh no, it’s supposed to be like that. It’s a fashion trend.”

“A trend…? To have torn clothing…?” Now this might just be the strangest thing he’s ever heard. He folds the jeans back up and puts them back on the shelf.

“Hmm… These might be the best I’m gonna get,” she mumbles, holding the smallest pair of human-proportioned jeans she could find in the “men’s” section. “I’m gonna go try these on! You should try some on too!!”

Without further delay, Leaf races towards the fitting rooms. Meta Knight stands there, mystified. He… should try some on too? Admittedly, he’s curious regarding what it would be like to wear such a garment, but…

…no. No, he’s fine just the way he is. He has more important things to think about than this “fashion” thing. So he abandons the jeans selection and follows Leaf to the fitting room so he can wait for her to be done. The girl asks one of the jeans-wearing Pianta employees if she can use the fitting room and they nod, leading her there.

“You can use the last one!” the Pianta informs her sweetly.

“Thank you!” With a grin, Leaf starts to walk past the fitting rooms to get to the one at the end. Before she can reach it however, the door next to it opens up and a human woman with platinum blonde hair walks out, and she and Leaf bump into each other.

“Oops! Sorry!” Leaf says. The woman gives her a gentle smile.

“It’s alright.” As Leaf continues to the fitting room, the woman glances in the opposite direction and spots Meta Knight. “...Meta Knight? Is that you?”

“...Hm? Yes, I am he.” The woman is wearing a black tee, faded jeans, and flat laced-up sneakers instead of her signature blue dress, so it takes a moment for the star warrior to recognize her. “...Wait. You’re Princess Rosalina, correct?”

Rosalina smiles softly. “Yes. It’s a pleasure to see you again. But what are you doing here? A spot of shopping?”

“Not particularly. It seems our lodgings were destroyed last night, so everyone is staying at Luigi’s home until repairs are complete. I arrived a little off the mark, so Peach and the others invited me to accompany them until they were done with their shopping.”

The space princess looks shocked to be hearing about the state of things. “I see. I had no idea such a thing had happened to our home. Although I am not surprised…” Her lips curve into an amused smile. “I wanted to do a spot of shopping myself before making my way to Smash, but it seems as a result I shall be reuniting with everyone sooner than I initially thought…”

“Yo, you’re in Smash too?!”

comes Leaf’s muffled voice from within the fitting room.

“So am I! That’s AWESOME! My name is Leaf, what’s yours??”

Rosalina chuckles at the girl’s enthusiasm. “It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Leaf. My name is Rosalina.”

“Ooh, that’s such a pretty name! Nice to meetcha, Rosalina!”

The two of them continue chatting through the closed door for a little bit. After a minute, Leaf comes out wearing one of the pants she picked out.

“Do these look too big on me?” She twirls around to show off all angles.

“They look just fine on you,” Rosalina replies. After a few seconds of examining herself in the mirror, Leaf turns to Meta Knight.

“What do you think, mister Meta Knight?”

“...They look fine.” He has no idea what he’s supposed to be looking for that might not be fine. Satisfied with the answer, Leaf nods and smiles.

“Yeah, I think I’m gonna get these!” Before she goes back into the fitting room to change into a different pair of jeans, she addresses Meta Knight once more: “Why don’t you try something on, mister Meta Knight? I feel bad that you’ve been following us around all day and haven’t gotten anything for yourself.”

“Do not worry about me. I simply have little interest in this ‘fashion’.”

“But not

no

interest.” The Pokemon Trainer smiles knowingly, having picked up on his growing interest through his questions. “Even if you’re not getting anything, it’s just fun to try stuff on! Come on, I wanna see what you look like wearing pants! I bet you’d look super good in them.”

“...You think so?” Meta Knight turns to look at himself in the mirror. Before today, not once in his life had he ever imagined wearing such a garment. He had a cape, his gloves, his mask, and armour, and that’s all he believed he never needed. But now he has been left wondering… could there be more?

“...Alright. Since you insist, I’ll try on just one.”

Leaf practically squeals with delight. Rosalina giggles, amused by all of this.

“Leaf, why don’t you focus on yourself while I help him find something in his size?”

At Rosalina’s suggestion, Leaf nods and goes back into the fitting room, shutting it and locking it behind her. Meanwhile, Rosalina and Meta Knight return to the depths of the store, browsing the selection for the perfect pair of jeans for Meta Knight to try on.

It’s difficult to browse for clothing in a foreign world. Meta Knight is a completely different species from any inhabitant in this world - and as a result, he has a different size and proportions. The store carries plenty of stock for Nokis and Piantas, but also some for humans, Toads, and other species. After much consideration, Meta Knight decides to try on a smaller pair of the Pianta jeans. They’re practically child-sized. He was worried about the leg length since well… Piantas have legs and he doesn’t exactly, but Rosalina assured him that they could see someone who could shorten it.

Now… the moment of truth.

By the time Meta Knight has successfully found a pair of jeans, Leaf is done trying on her selections and is back in her regular clothes. He stops in the doorway of the fitting room and looks back at the girls one last time. Leaf is nodding enthusiastically and giving a thumbs up while Rosalina simply smiles. Finally, Meta Knight shuts and locks the door, ready to try on these Pants.

Although he said he was only going to try on one pair, the princess convinced him to take a couple of varying waist sizes so he can at least try one that fits. He decided to pick out the ones with legs that flare out at the bottom. Something about them just looked more comfortable than the skinny jeans. It is now that Meta Knight realizes why the girls take so long changing - he’ll have to remove much of his armour to put these on. Thankfully there’s a seat in the change room, so it’s a bit easier to slide the pants on.

Wait… should the pants go above or below his mask?

…This is much more complicated than Meta Knight was prepared for.

Well, a quick test reveals that this first pair of jeans - the smaller of the two - has considerable difficulty buttoning up over his mask, so he decides to try them under first. He removes his mask so he can see what he’s doing and buttons up the pants about an inch below his mouth. Rosalina found him a style that was made so the waistline curved downwards a bit so it wouldn’t be in his face. After taking a moment to adjust it for comfort, he zips up the fly and puts his mask back on to properly judge how it looks and feels.

Hmm… it certainly feels unusual. Meta Knight stares at his reflection in the mirror, gaze fixated on how the denim seems to appear from under his mask and bunches up on the floor. He takes a moment to roll up the pant legs like how he’s seen others do, then puts his shoes back on. In the mirror, he hardly looks different unless he turns to the side, revealing the waistband that wraps all around his body. It’s almost subtle. Cute, even.

But… something doesn’t feel right. Every time he moves, the jeans’ button scrapes against the inside of his mask. He keeps feeling the need to adjust it. This added layer under his mask has completely thrown off everything, and no matter how much he messes with the tightness of the mask, he can’t stop it from brushing against the jeans’ button.

This is unacceptable.

So he takes everything off again - including the jeans - so he can try on the larger pair. And what luck - it even fits over his mask! Immediately Meta Knight is overcome with a feeling of relief and comfort as he does up the button and zips up the fly. In fact, his mask actually feels even

more

secure like this. Perhaps it is that fact alone that warms him up to this whole

fashion

thing.

But… he’s still not sure about if this jeans-wearing lifestyle is for him yet. He needs another opinion.

Aftering putting all his armour back on, Meta Knight unlocks the fitting room door and walks out while still wearing the jeans.

“How does this look?” he asks the two women waiting for him, genuinely curious of their opinion. Leaf gasps dramatically and starts bouncing up and down giddily - the same reaction she’d have whenever one of the other girls came out wearing a cute outfit. Rosalina is a little shocked at first, but then a slow smile spreads upon her features. But before they can give a verbal response, a familiar face enters the store:

“Hey guys, what’s taking so long?! I’m gonna eat your burger Leaf if you don’t hurry up--!” Daisy - with Ken and Kirby following after her at a more casual pace - jogs through the store to reach the back where the fitting rooms are and immediately gasps when she spots Rosalina. “ROSIE! Long time no see!!”

The space princess giggles, gently returning the hug that her friend offers. “Did we not have a tennis tournament and a party shortly before the Smash invitations went out…?”

“Yeah, but that was like FOREVER ago!” In reality it was less than six months ago, but clearly that was still

too long

for the Sarasaland princess’ tastes. It takes Kirby’s loud, surprised noise for Daisy to turn her head and notice what Meta Knight is wearing. “OhmiGOSH Meta, you look SO CUTE in those!”

“...Do you truly think so?”

The girls and Kirby all nod eagerly. Ken gives the warrior a thumbs up. “Yeah man, you look great! Really rocking the look there.”

Kirby runs off while Meta Knight approaches the mirror, examining himself closer. Yes… he certainly would say he doesn’t look bad. In fact, he’d say he doesn’t mind this. These pants are actually more comfortable than he thought they’d be. No wonder so many people wear them.

“How is the fit?” Rosalina asks. “Do you think you need another size?”

“No, this size is good. However, I must admit I’m curious about the other styles.” He looks up at the Pokemon Trainer. “Leaf, you said the

men’s

styles and

women’s

styles felt different?”

The girl in question breaks into a grin. “Yeah! You should try them both on and see which one you like best, mister Meta Knight!”

Meta Knight nods. “I agree.”

Kirby returns from his adventure around the store, wearing a pair of jeans on his head. “Poyo!!!” He starts hopping and dancing around, so excited to be matching with Meta Knight. Two star warriors, now fashion stars in the making.

And so the tale goes on. As Meta Knight and Kirby try on more jeans, Ken shares his opinions and enthusiastic encouragement. Daisy, Leaf, and Rosalina end up discussing sleepover ideas for when they return to Luigi’s place. But that one is a story for another time. For today is dedicated to a story about a legend.

A legend… named

Meta Pants.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“C’mon, hurry up alreadyyyy,” Popo whines as he and the other kids watch the grown ups huddle around the fridge. “Shh, they’ll hear you!” scolds Nana. Thankfully, the older Smashers seem too distracted with the gross drink they’re making to hear the whispering from under the table. Toon Link has his Game Face on as he is pressed against the ground, watching the proceedings through the gap between the tablecloth and the floor. He looks like he’s ready to bolt and complete the mission at any moment.“Guys! Stop!” Lucas whispers, horrified to see how close the Inklings are to blowing their cover. The two of them keep trying to reach out and grab Dark Pit’s ankles - for some reason, he’s over here by the table instead of with the others. After being admonished, the two squid kids reluctantly cease their childish behaviour and return to waiting for the coast to clear.It feels like an eternity, but finally the grown ups leave the kitchen. As soon as the door shuts behind the last person in the group, the six kids crawl out from under the table and run over to the refrigerator. “Is it really okay to do this?” Lucas asks, his morals getting the better of him. “Maybe we should find Luigi and ask him…”“I told you, I saw Luigi stock up earlier!” Nana responds. Meanwhile, Toon Link and orange Inkling are pushing a chair over to the fridge. “Besides, this is our home for a while, so that basically means we’re allowed to have whatever food we find. I mean, that’s how it is at the other mansion! And how it was the last time we stayed here.”“If Luigi wasn’t okay with it, then he should have said something first!” Popo agrees. Lucas sighs, defeated. Luigi is super nice and all, but he can’t help but feel a little bad! First they used his home for a haunted house, now they’re taking his snacks. This is a tough couple days for the younger Mario brother…Once the chair is in position, orange Inkling wastes no time climbing onto it and opening the fridge freezer. She cheers upon spotting what they came for: ice cream!!!!!! She eagerly takes all three tubs out of the freezer and throws them down at her partners-in-crime. Toon Link and blue Inkling each catch one, while the Ice Climbers catch the third one together. “I’ll carry it!” “No, I’LL carry it!”Lucas is the only one who thinks to grab spoons.With the heist a grand success, the six of them hurry out of the room and sneak back through the main lobby to reach their hideout on the second floor. It’s a room that looks like a kids’ bedroom - the kids picked it for their sleepover cuz it has BUNK BEDS. (They played Rock-Paper-Scissors to decide who gets to sleep in them. The Icies won top bunk while Ness won the bottom bunk.)When they arrive, they see that the rest of the gang has already returned from their own mission. “What took you guys so long?!” Bowser Jr. complains. The returning kids all sit down amongst the pillows, blankets, and snacks. The room is a mess of discarded candy wrappers and empty bags of chips, but the children do not care. “A bunch of people came in the kitchen after us!!” orange Inkling explains, groaning. “They made Lucario drink some weird drink Captain Falcon made.” “It took forever,” Nana adds, rolling her eyes. “At least you got the ice cream,” Young Link says from behind a sad clown mask. “But only three containers? I thought Luigi would have more than that.”Ness takes one of the spoons. “Hmm… maybe he’s hiding them!”Villager gasps silently in shock.“That would be EVIL,” Nana says. “Why would he do that though?” blue Inkling asks. “I bet he wants to hog all the ice cream for himself!” Bowser Jr. growls. “Ooooh, next time I see that loser I’ll beat him up for sure!”“Do any of you know if Luigi has any other freezers?” Mega Man asks as Toon Link and Villager start digging into the strawberry ice cream beside him. In particular, he’s directing this question to the Melee veterans.“Hmm… there’s the cold storage in the basement,” Young Link replies. “But Dracula locked the basement when he left for the night. Trust me: I tried to get back down there.”“I can’t really think of anywhere else,” Popo admits. But he wasn’t thinking very hard, because he was too busy thinking about the ice cream they currently have. “Hey! Who has the mint chocolate ice cream?”Orange Inkling holds out the open tub. Her face is covered in ice cream. Satisfied, Popo digs his spoon into the yummy treat and starts eating. Nana makes a face.“Blech! Mint chocolate is gross!” “No it’s not! It’s the best ice cream flavour!”“No way! That’s chocolate.” As if to prove her point, Nana dunks her spoon into the chocolate ice cream tub and shoves it into her mouth. “Chocolate is boring.” “You’re boring!”Villager is making funny faces while the Ice Climbers argue. Such petty arguments are such a common occurrence between these two that none of the others really think twice about it.“Hey, would you two shut up so we can start the movie?” Junior snaps as he puts the DVD in his tablet and stands it up against a cushion. While Team B retrieved the ice cream, the rest of the kids stealthed their way to Luigi’s DVD collection and grabbed a bunch of scary-looking R-rated movies. Eating junk food, watching movies you’re not allowed to, staying up aaaaaall night… yeah, that’s what sleepovers are all about!! With all the dumb adults busy with their OWN sleepovers, there was no one to chaperone the kids! Woohoo! “What’s the movie called?” blue Inkling asks. When Young Link holds up the case, the squid kid instantly recoils in fright at the picture.“It’s called The Exorcist. It’s a really old movie - I looked online and apparently it’s soooo scary that people fainted in the theatre!”As Lucas and the Inklings start to look a little nervous, Junior scoffs. “Pfft, I bet it’s not THAT scary. Old movies are always dumb cuz they don’t have good graphics! I’m definitely not going to get scared. Hey, somebody turn off the lights! We need to make it EXTRA scary, hehehe!”After the lights are off - leaving the tablet as the only light source in the room - the kids start the movie. They all have to huddle together to watch. The movie has a slow start, but there are a few unsettling scenes early on that put the children at unease. “Hey, Young Link you gotta take off that mask!” Nana suddenly says about fifteen minutes into the movie. YL, lying on his stomach and idly kicking his legs, tilts his head towards the ice climber.“Why?”“Cuz then we can’t see you get scared! That’s not fair.”“Well I’m not going to get scared.”“C’mon, take it off!” Nana suddenly reaches over and tries to pull the mask off of his face. YL uses both hands to keep it on.“Stop that.” Suddenly, more hands join in in trying to remove the mask. Popo, orange Inkling, Toon Link, and Villager are all trying to get it off. “Guys I mean it, qui--”As soon as the mask is pried off his face, YL shuts his mouth. Silently, he furrows his brow and reaches over to try and take it back. Orange Inkling puts the clown mask under her pillow and sits on it, sticking her tongue out. YL pouts and glares at her. Before a scuffle can break out, a loud noise from the movie startles everyone. Several of the children - including Young Link - look at the screen with wide eyes like a deer in headlights. The young boy tries one more time to push Inkling away to get his mask, but the shark-wearing squidkid retaliates by biting his arm. YL gasps in pain but says nothing else, bringing his arm back and giving up on the mask.  The Exorcist ends up being the scariest movie any of the kids in the room have ever seen, and all eleven of them are thoroughly petrified by the end of the movie. The movie is much more than any of them signed up for, with most of them wishing they had not watched it in the first place. Certain scenes throughout the movie make some of the kids even feel sick, and it’s a wonder no one ended up acting on that nausea. It isn’t until the credits roll that the kids realize they’ve been holding each other in fear for the last two hours.Lucas breathes out a shaky sigh of relief, his face wet from tears. “I-I’m so glad it’s over…!”“Whoa,” Ness says, shaking his head to recover from the tension that movie created, “I think that was even scarier than The Shining!”Orange Inkling looks particularly traumatized. Her face is pale and she’s staring blankly at the screen. The spirit of the shark has abandoned her, and now she is being reminded of her frail mortality. Recognizing she’s distracted, Young Link manages to wrench the mask out from under her pillow and puts it back on. He then opens his mouth to speak for the first time in two hours.“That movie kinda sucked.”““Shut up!”” the Ice Climbers say simultaneously before they both hit YL with a pillow. Popo continues: “You were scared too! Admit it!”There’s suddenly a rattling sound coming from the bed and everybody screams in fear. When the kids all turn around, they see it’s just Villager shaking the bed. “That’s not very nice,” Mega Man says, frowning. Villager smiles silently. “Can we watch a different movie now?”Toon Link frantically kicks all the other horror movies away and grabs the tablet to find something nicer to watch, like a Marvel movie or something. Bowser Jr. goes “hey!” and lunges at him, trying to wrestle him to get it back.“Don’t touch my stuff!” He manages to snatch the tablet away. “Hmph! You guys are all wimps!”Nana snorts. “Oh yeah? You’re shaking.”Junior furrows his brow, unable to stop himself from quivering in fear as the events of the movie played over and over in his mind. He thought it was just going to be some cheesy possession movie! He didn’t know it was going to be like THAT! “W-Well, WHATEVER! I-It’s not because I’m scared, I-I’m just cold--”
BANG!

BANG BANG BANG BANG
The kids scream as loud noises can be heard from somewhere else in the mansion. As distant thuds and screams make their way through the walls, the kids scurry to different parts of the room to hide. Blue Inkling, Icies, and Ness hide under some blankets. Toon Link and Mega Man rush to crouch under a desk. Bowser Jr. gasps and retreats into his shell. Orange Inkling stumbles over to the bed and crawls under it, kicking out everything underneath it to fit. Young Link and Lucas are both frozen in panic. Villager trips and falls down, wearing a fearful expression. “It’s the demon!” Popo cries, hugging his partner. “Wh-What do we do?”“We gotta do an exorcism!” Ness suggests. “Like the movie!”“D-Does anyone know HOW to do that??” Nana screams.The sounds continue for a few minutes, with the children too terrified to do anything about them. And then, all at once… they stop. An eerie silence falls upon the room. Everyone slowly comes out of their hiding spots.“Is the ghost gone??” Junior asks, refusing to come out of his shell. No one is quite sure what to think.“Maybe one of the others got rid of it…?” Lucas suggests. Nana nods, gripping onto that notion for dear life. “Maybe Palutena got rid of it with her light magic! Like bzzap!”“O-Or maybe Luigi got it with his vacuum?” Lucas suggests. The reminder that they aren’t the only living souls in this mansion puts the kids at ease somewhat. Toon Link gets up and quickly turns the light back on.“...Hey what’s that?” With the light on Young Link notices an odd board over on the floor by the bed. It must have gotten pushed out when Inkling crawled under there. He picks it up and examines it. “...Oh I see! This is an ouija board!”“A Luigi board?” Popo asks.“A ouija board!” Ness echoes, smiling. “There was one in the movie, remember? At the beginning.”There’s a chorus of “ohhhh”s around the room. The kids slowly crowd back together to examine it. “I didn’t really understand that part,” blue Inkling admits. “What’s this thing for?” “I think it’s for talking to ghosts,” Mega Man explains, and Blue’s mouth turns into an “O” before shifting to horror. Ness gasps as he comes up with a great idea.“Hey, if there’s a ghost in the house, why don’t we try talking to it?” “Sure,” Young Link says. “Sounds fun.”Bowser Jr. starts snickering. “If we get rid of it then WE can take all the credit!”“M-Maybe we should just leave it,” Lucas suggests. Junior scoffs at him.“C’mon, don’t be a baby!” The Koopa prince looks at the other kids. “How do we use it? Does anyone know?”“Let me see.” Ness takes the board from Young Link and puts it on the ground in the middle of the group. Then he puts the weird heart-shaped piece of wood on top of it. “We all have to put our finger on it, like this.” Ness puts one of his fingers on it. Young Link, Junior, the Ice Climbers, orange Inkling, Toon Link, and Villager all copy him. The other three don’t look so sure.“Come on!” Nana prods. “I bet we’ll be stronger if we all work together to get rid of the ghost.”Hesitating a few moments longer, Lucas, blue Inkling, and Mega Man finally join in as well.“N-Now what...?” Lucas asks, looking to Ness for guidance.“Now we have to ask the ghost questions and it’ll spell out words to answer for us. But it’s REALLY important that nobody takes their hand off the thingy until the very end.” “Why?” asks orange Inkling. Ness scratches his head with his free hand.“Umm… I think the ghost can possess us if we do?”Several of the kids gasp. “I didn’t know about that part!” Lucas whines, regretting his decision to join. “It’s okay,” Ness assures him and the others. “Just don’t take your finger off the pointer thing and nothing bad should happen!”Ness is very smart and all the kids respect him, so everyone believes him. “What do we ask first?” Mega Man asks. “I mean,” Young Link starts, “is there even a ghost here? Didn’t we say that someone else probably… dealt with it…”What prompts YL to trail off is the wooden pointer drifting to the corner of the board to where it says “YES”. The tension in the room is palpable. Looks like the questioning has already begun.“Who did that?!” Bowser Jr. demands, looking at the other kids in an accusatory fashion. “Which of you chumps moved the thingy?”Everyone fervently denies it, their horror growing when no one fesses up to the motion. The pointer remains still during this time.“Let’s ask another question!” Ness whispers, smiling as if he’s a bit excited about this. “WHO ARE YOU???” Orange shouts, making the other kids jump. The pointer jerks across the board, spelling out a word.LIGMA“I don’t think that’s a name,” Mega Man states with a frown as a few of the less-savvy kids mutter the word quietly. The pointer starts moving again.L IGMABALSuddenly, the wooden pointer shakes and flies out of the kids’ grasp, launching across the room and crashing out the window. The kids start screaming in horror, nearly all of them getting up and sprinting out of the room to get away from the ghost. Only two stay behind: Young Link and Bowser Junior. Once all the other kids are gone, the two of them look at each other and break into a grin.“That RULED!” Junior says, and the two kids share a high-five. “Y’know Young Link, you really are waaay cooler than the other Links. They’re SO goody-goody.”“Of course I’m cooler than them,” the boy responds. “These past couple days have been fun. When the other mansion is fixed, we should become roommates. Then we can do stuff like this all the time.”“Yeah, that would be great! Let’s do it!”Now that the others are gone, the two of them have full reign of the remaining snacks. As Bowser Jr. grabs his tablet and opens the Netflix app so they can watch another movie, he speaks up:“So you’re the one who was moving the pointy thingy around, right?”Young Link casually sits down next to the prince, his face unreadable behind the mask. “I thought that was you.”The two of them stare at each other, trying to figure out which of them is lying. Then, slowly, they look at the ouija board… then at the broken window……Huh.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“What’s with all the RACKET?!” Bowser roars as he pokes his head out the door. He catches sight of a bunch of the younger Smashers running down the hall, screaming their heads off like they just saw a ghost or something. Bowser scoffs and slams the door shut before stomping back over to where he was sitting on the giant bed.“What on earth was that about?” Ganondorf asks, also sitting on the king-sized bed. There are quite a few things strewn about on said bed - namely snacks, playing cards, magazines, and beauty products. It would be relevant to note that both of these guys have hair curlers wedged snugly into their hair and their faces look incredibly shimmery thanks to the exfoliating masks they were wearing until about twenty minutes ago.“Who knows!” Bowser groans. “Looked like a bunch of kids were fooling around.”“And your son?”Bowser jabs an accusatory claw at the Gerudo man. “For your information, Junior was NOT with them. My boy’s got better things to do than hang around with a bunch of chumps!”Ganondorf chuckles darkly. “I wasn’t implying anything.”“Hmph. Yeah right.” Glowering, Bowser looks around and accidentally notices the clock. “Oh!!!!! It’s past midnight, you know what that means!! We can check our new horoscopes for the day!!!”Bowser is practically giggling to himself as he picks up the nearest magazine - a gossip magazine from the Mushroom Kingdom called Koopa16 - and flips to the page that details all the horoscopes for November 2nd. “ ‘It will please you to wrap this week by being productive at work today. It’s easy to concentrate on issues and do routine work you might usually avoid. A discussion with someone in a position of authority will go well. Solid day to make plans.’ Hmm…”“‘Productive at work’?” Ganondorf scoffs. “That’s not even possible. Master Hand is too busy with mansion repairs; all the recording has been put on hold.”“Then it must mean… my work as a KING!” The Koopa King grins and crushes the magazine in his hands in his excitement. “Oh yeah, I’m gonna get SO MUCH done today. And ‘someone in authority’... I bet that’s the Host! Yeah, they’re gonna help me conquer the kingdom! Awesome!!!”“Good luck with that,” Ganondorf says sarcastically. “Now get your filthy mitts off that magazine so I can read mine.”“Huh? Oh, sorry.” Bowser hands him the scrunched up magazine. Ganondorf unravels it and flattens out the correct page once he finds it. He reads it silently.“Hmm. Interesting.”“What? What does it say?”“This magazine is unreliable. Worthless.” Ganondorf casts the booklet aside and grabs a different one. While he flips to the horoscopes in this new magazine, Bowser takes a look at Ganondorf’s discarded horoscope.
A conversation with a partner or close friend will be about serious, practical issues today. They could relate to how to share expenses or the division of labour (who takes out the garbage, who empties the dishwasher). Could be anything. No doubt you will make positive strides in the direction you want to go.
“HAH! You’re right, this isn’t yours at all! You don’t have any close friends!” Bowser starts laughing.Ganondorf ignores him and reads his new horoscope. He tosses this one as well and reaches for the next. Bowser also takes a peek at this second unworthy horoscope.
You get by with some support from a close friend or your partner today when it comes to realizing a goal or dream. Be open to receiving the feedback or constructive criticism that you need. On another note, someone could need your assistance. It's a win-win.
“Y’know, I think maybe it’s telling you to read between the lines a bit,” Bowser suggests. “Both of these are telling you to GET SOME FRIENDS.”“Hm. This one isn’t a pathetic excuse of propaganda,” Ganondorf remarks as he stares at the horoscope, once again ignoring Bowser entirely. “ ‘Your energy seems exhausted today as you face blocks and rules at work and at home. You need to find a healing outlet or release for your tension, anger and frustration or you may explode at the wrong time and wrong place. Meditation and Yoga are recommended. Lucky number 10. Colour red.’ Yes, I believe this is accurate. I do feel rather exhausted putting up with morons as of late.”“Alright alright, let me see what that one says about me!” Bowser snatches the magazine and looks for his own zodiac sign. “ ‘You are fortunate to have faithful friends and family as they stand by you through thick and thin. Good energy enables you to indulge in sporty pastimes and heavy work schedules. Success and professional achievement bring material wealth and security. Lucky number 7. Colour blue.’ ”There is silence for a moment. Bowser sniffles, emotional about the kind words.“That hardly fits you,” Ganondorf taunts. “SHUT UP!!!”Even though neither of them are happy about this sleepover and silently wish they hadn’t been kicked out of the other one, somehow Bowser and Ganondorf make it through the entire night without killing each other.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Two tacticians are reading alone in a tacky treasure room. These tacticians are of course the two Robins, who are finally spending some quality time together after months of being preoccupied with their own agendas.

Yes… spending time together… reading two separate books while in the same room.

Our first Robin is lounging inside an open treasure chest. Thanks to the cleaning efforts being interrupted, this room is still covered in Halloween paraphernalia. Robin used this to her advantage and used all the cotton and drapery she could find to fill the chest and turn it into a comfy seat. With her body sinking into the box, her legs dangle over the edge. The second Robin chose a simpler approach for seating accommodations: he simply knocked over a closed treasure chest and is lying down on it. There are some objects wedged under the chest to keep it from rocking, and a few blankets and tapestries laid over top of it to make it more comfortable to lie on.

The two of them have been unbothered all night, oblivious to the chaos happening in the rest of the mansion. How lucky that both of their teams found this secret room during the Halloween game! I mean, who else would think looking into a mousehole would suck you into a whole other room? Only crazy people, probably. And

geniuses,

like them.

Robin blindly reaches for the bowl of chips and grabs one to put in her mouth as she turns the page with a single hand. The two of them certainly don’t have a feast, but they managed to find a decent selection of snacks before any of the other Smashers could get their hands on them.

“Do you remember that club we used to go to last season?” Robin suddenly asks out of the blue, not looking up from his book. This is how group reading usually goes between these two: they read books, then every now and then speak up about their thoughts about their reading… or discuss something completely unrelated. Like this topic here.

Robin lets out a noise of delight at the memories they share of that place. “Club 64? Of course! We should go there again while we’re staying in this world.”

“Want to go there tonight?”

Club 64 is a cozy little establishment located at the docks of Toad Town. The Robins were introduced to it when Peach gave the newcomers a tour of her world early last season. It quickly became the pair’s favourite hangout in the Mushroom Kingdom. It’s not a particularly busy place - even during the night - but there’s just something homey about the atmosphere.

“Tonight?” Robin looks up from her book to give her counterpart an amused, incredulous look. He simply smiles back at her. “It’s a bit far, isn’t it? It’ll be daytime by the time we get there. Unless you’re suggesting…”

Luigi’s mansion home is quite a ways off from Toad Town. Located in the middle of the woods, it requires a drive to get anywhere with civilization.

“You went with Peach and the others to the mall, right?” Robin asks to confirm, his face making it clear he has a

devious plot

up his sleeve. “How did you get there?”

“Peach called Toad to drive us there,” Robin responds very matter-of-factly, but she sits up in her seat and closes her book as if she’s getting ready to go. “He’s gone back to the castle already with the bus. Buuuut I DO remember seeing a few other vehicles out front…”

Not another word needs to be said. The two Robins get up and prepare to head out in the dead of night so they can go to a club to read their books. Instead of getting changed, they simply throw on their tacticians robes over their pajamas, pack their books and snacks into a bag, and exit the mansion. It’s late enough that they don’t run into anyone in the halls - but if they listen carefully, they can hear murmurs beyond the walls.

They exit the main door and reach the front lawn.

“Whoa,” Robin says when she sees the massive crack in the ground. “What happened here?”

“Maybe someone dropped something?” the other Robin suggested. They both shrug it off and descend the stairs to reach where all the Smashers’ vehicles are parked.

“Do you think the horses would mind if we woke them up?” Robin asks as she spots Zelda’s and Link’s horses hanging out among the trees.

“Probably, and it would be bad if we lost them in town,” Robin responds. “Hmm, I’m willing to bet most of these are locked…”

“Ooh, the Blue Falcon!” With a big grin, the silver-haired tactician rushes over to the F-Zero machine and slaps the roof of it. The top opens automatically. “A tight fit for two, but at least I’ve driven one of these babies before.”

Robin chuckles as he approaches. “Right, you came third in that race Falcon set up last time…”

It was a race where literally none of the Smashers were taught how to drive the machines aside from some vague tips from Captain Falcon himself. Falcon was first and Samus was second - Robin herself was simply “the least bad” enough to beat everyone else. Also she made a lot of people crash, eliminating the competition.

Robin recalls his counterpart’s driving skills. “I’m not sure I trust you to drive me anywhere in that thing.”

The other Robin rolls her eyes as she climbs in the car. “But you’re going to come with me, right?”

Robin laughs and gets in the car as well, awkwardly shuffling into the seat behind the driver. This is a model of the Blue Falcon that the Captain specifically uses for Smash. It’s exactly the same as the normal car except a second seat has been crammed into the back.

“Comfortable?” Robin laughs. The other Robin chuckles as he struggles to put on the seatbelt.

“I can’t even see out the window.”

“Perfect datemobile, right??” Robin cackles at an inside joke as she presses a button to make the top lower back down over them, trapping them inside the vehicle.

“I’m surprised it wasn’t locked!”

“Oh, it’s cuz you need to do something special to turn off the safety.” Robin reaches under the console to flick a few switches. The machine suddenly seems to hum to life, and the two Robins have to yell over the noise of the engine to hear each other. “HE SHOWS THIS TO LITERALLY EVERYONE HE’S GONE ON A ‘DATE’ WITH, IT’S SOOO FUNNY. LITERALLY ANY OF US CAN JUST STEAL IT!”

The tactician in the backseat laughs. “LIKE WE’RE DOING NOW?”

“YEAH!!! READY?”

“ONLY IF YOU’RE PREPARED TO DRIVE WITHOUT ANY HELP WHATSOEVER FROM ME.”

“NAH, YOU SHOULD TRY TO BACKSEAT DRIVE ME ANYWAYS. I’LL EVEN LISTEN TO WHAT YOU SAY.”

“ALRIGHT THEN: DON’T CRASH.”

“OKAY! OH WHOOPSIE, WHAT DOES THIS BUTTON DO?”

Suddenly, the Blue Falcon lurches to life and speeds ahead. Both Robins start screaming at the sudden acceleration - driver Robin has a vicegrip on the steering wheel as she frantically tries to dodge all the obstacles and reach the road. Narrowly missing the trees, she ends up crashing through a fence and does a sharp turn onto the road.

“OKAY, WE’RE ON THE ROAD NOW. SO FAR SO GOOD!”

“THANK YOU FOR THE UPDATE, YOU’LL HAVE TO KEEP THAT UP SO I KNOW WHAT’S GOING ON UP THERE.”

“SURE. THE ROAD IS STRAIGHT AND I DON’T SEE ANY OTHER CARS YET. THE SPEED THINGY SAYS WE ARE GOING OVER 400 KILOMETERS AN HOUR.”

“THAT IS TERRIFYING!”

“YEAH!!” Robin starts laughing again. “OH SH--” Suddenly the car lurches to the right. There’s a thud, like they just hit something, but they keep speeding forward otherwise. “SORRY, DIDN’T SEE THE TURN FAST ENOUGH.”

“THIS IS THE WORST THING WE’VE EVER DONE.”

“NAH, I DON’T THINK ANYTHING CAN TOP OUR

‘GAME NIGHT’.”

The other Robin barks out a laugh at the memory. There are a few more swerves and terrifying lurches.

“SO IF WE CRASH, I’M PROBABLY MORE LIKELY TO DIE, RIGHT? IF I DIE, I GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO MARRY CHROM AND BECOME LUCINA’S NEW MOM.”

“AT THIS SPEED WE ARE

BOTH

DYING IF WE CRASH.”

“I’M JUST BEING OPTIMISTIC HERE!”

There are a few seconds of silence while Robin focuses on driving.

“HEY, DID YOU HEAR THE MUSHROOM KINGDOM MALL CLOSED DOWN ABOUT A YEAR AGO?”

“REALLY? BUT THEN WHERE DID YOU GUYS GO?”

“WE WENT TO ISLE DELFINO’S MALL. SOUNDS LIKE NO ONE KNOWS WHY IT CLOSED. ANYWAY, WE JUST PASSED BY IT SO I THOUGHT I’D BRING IT UP.”

There’s a pause before the Robin in the backseat responds.

“DO YOU WANT TO GO CHECK IT OUT?”

“AWWWW YEAHHHHH I DO!” As Robin says this, she makes the Blue Falcon swerve so hard that it turns a full 180 degrees and they start going back towards the abandoned mall. Even though she slams the brakes when they get close, they still end up stopping quite a ways from the building. Deciding to simply walk the rest of the way, the tactician duo stumble out of the vehicle, giggling at the thrill they just had.

“Oh-- oh wow,” Once the high dies down for him, Robin lights a fire using a tome and gets a good look at the state of the Mushroom Mall. “I never thought I’d see this place look so… desolate.”

“Isn’t it creepy?” Lighting her own fire, Robin shoots the fireball a distance ahead to help light their path. “Even though it wasn’t in a great location, it would still get pretty busy! I’m telling you: something

fishy

happened here.”

The Smashers had come to this mall a few times during the Smash 4 season, so it was quite a shock to hear that it closed in the few years between then and the start of Ultimate. Weeds have started to overrun the parking lot, and the streetlamps no longer turn on at night. Half of the giant letters on the building are now on the ground - whether they were taken down or fell on their own is a mystery.

Before the Robins can even walk halfway across the parking lot, they are accosted by the sudden appearance of a blue blur.

“Hey guys!” Sonic skids to a stop in front of the two of them, the wind briefly blowing their robes about. The cold air takes this time to bite their skin through their pajamas. “What are you two doing out here?”

“Explorin’,” Robin says simply. She gives the hedgehog a lopsided grin. “Bit late to go for a run, don’t you think?”

“It was getting kinda noisy back at Luigi’s place, made it hard to sleep. Figured things might quiet down by the time I got back.” Sonic offers his own grin. “Lucky you guys stopped when you did - I thought you were Captain Falcon and I was about to try and race ya! What are you two doing with the Blue Falcon?”

““We stole it,”” both Robins say simultaneously, then look at each other and snicker. Sonic stares at them in disbelief. He’s about to say something in response when suddenly, the three of them spot a strange light in the distance.

“That looks like it’s coming from a flashlight,” Sonic observes. “Is there someone over there?”

Someone standing at the entrance of the mall? The mall that’s supposed to be deserted?

“Quick, hide!” Robin says, and he leads the other two over to a lonely van in the parking lot. They all hide behind it. As they peer out from behind the van, they see several shadowy figures exit the mall. Thanks to the flashlights some of them are waving around, the trio can see three Toads, a Koopa, and a blue Yoshi - all wearing business attire and carrying briefcases - alongside a security guard Koopa. The five businesspersons walk out into the parking lot and head for the van the Smashers are hiding behind. Quickly and silently, the three of them slip into the darkness and remain hidden while the suspicious fellows climb into the van and drive off.

“What do you think THAT was all about?” Sonic asks the other two. The Robins look at each other with matching grins, unable to hide the excitement in their eyes.

“I don’t know, but I want to find out!” Robin says giddily. She starts rushing over to the mall, taking a roundabout way and keeping her head low so the security guard doesn’t spot her. The other Robin follows her without hesitation. Unable to ignore his curiosity, Sonic finds himself tagging along as well. With him in tow, Robin comes up with a plan.

“Sonic,” he begins, “do you think you could run over there and quietly knock out the guard?”

“What is this, a heist?” the hedgehog jokes. But he doesn’t protest - he sprints over there with his signature speed and dispatches the Koopa before they even notice him. The hedgehog looks around the area and through the glass doors to check for anyone else, then waves at the Robins to signal the coast is clear.

“I’ll be taking these!” Robin announces as she swipes a ring of keys and the flashlight from the unconscious security guard. The three of them then proceed to enter the mall.

As expected, the mall is devoid of any light sources aside from the starlight coming through the ceiling. Robin turns on the flashlight on the lowest setting and points the light down at the floor, maneuvering carefully so they don’t alert a security guard they can’t see. The three of them sneak through the entrance section and come up to the first fork in the road.

“Where should we go?” Sonic whispers.

“Let’s start with the staff-only halls,” the tactician suggests as he pokes his head around the corner, checking if the coast is clear. He glances at his long-haired counterpart. “You remember where those are, right?”

“You know it.” The three of them hurry down the big mall corridor to reach the closest entrance to the backrooms. As they go, they get the chance to peek into the various stores. Many of them have the shutters drawn, but the most unusual thing is… most of them still have their inventory out on display. Some have things knocked off the shelves, but others look perfectly organized, as if it was merely closed for the night.

“Oh man, this is

creepy!”

Sonic exclaims quietly. “Do we know what happened to this place?”

“No,” Robin replies, unable to hide her intrigue at this grand conspiracy building up before her. “Not even Peach knows. Or, if she does, then she wouldn’t tell us. I smell a

cover-up

though.”

The other Robin shoots her a smile. “Who wants to bet they’re hiding something in the basement?”

She smiles back. “Cliche, but likely. Let’s use the freight elevator! I think it’s right past these doors…”

The three of them head into the door labelled “EMPLOYEES ONLY” and enter a series of narrow halls. After a few turns, they reach the massive aforementioned elevator. Robin takes the ring of keys she got from the security guard and sticks one into the keyhole to open the elevator doors.

“There was something in here,” Robin murmurs as he hurries inside the elevator and examines the strange discolouration on the walls. He touches the marks and looks at his hands to see that it has rubbed off a bit. “...Tastes like salt. Some sort of mineral residue, perhaps?”

Sonic gawks as the two tacticians get

real

close to the walls to investigate. “Don’t eat it! Are you crazy?!”

“Hey, look at this funny keyhole.” Robin sifts through the keys in her hand until she finds one that matches the unique shape in the wall of the elevator. She puts it in, turns it, and presses the down arrow button that lights up. The elevator doors slide shut and it rumbles into motion around them.

When the elevator reaches the bottom, the doors open to reveal a looooong hallway with various doors lining the sides and a pair of double doors at the far end. The only light is the ominous green lamp on the wall above the far door.

“Oh this

screams

government conspiracy,” Robin says with a smile. She looks like she’s itching to run wild and check every single door. As the three of them step off the elevator, the other Robin chuckles at his counterpart’s excitement.

“You know, ‘government conspiracy’ would mean our good friend Princess Peach is in on it.”

“That would make so much sense!” Robin exclaims in a hushed voice. “I mean, WHY wouldn’t she know the reason this mall closed down??”

Sonic looks back and forth between the Robins and then down the eerie hall. “You guys do this kind of thing a lot, huh?”

The tacticians grin at each other and, without giving the hedgehog a response, start walking down the dank corridor. Sonic sighs and follows them.

The things that the three of them discovered down there… the horrors they witnessed… would never be spoken of to anybody else.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“Hmm, it seems the Host has come back to their senses,” Master Hand remarks dryly as the first raindrops start to fall. “A shame we couldn’t finish the foundation before then…”

With the Smash Mansion utterly destroyed, the Host’s realm was looking a bit like a wasteland. Even the grass didn’t quite have its manufactured life, seemingly wilting under the Host’s stress. This is truly the one unfortunate detail about renting out a realm that is intrinsically connected to its owner! Despite the hours that had passed, the world remains dark even beyond the clouds, as if trapped in an eternal night. Of course, working in darkness doesn’t stop Master Hand. As soon as the Smashers were cleared out, he promptly gathered up the Miis and ordered them to set up the mobile lights and get to work. They were fine with the darkness, but the rain was another matter.

“Awww man, it’s starting to rain?” one of the Miis whines. A few Miis get distracted and start playing in the puddles that form as the rain picks up. If Master Hand could facepalm right now… well, he’d be fighting the urge.

Honestly! R.O.B. would be more useful than this…!

“No more complaining!” The floating hand announces sternly. “No breaks until we restore the foundation. It’s just a little rain, hardly even a setback.”

“Achoo!” “Achoo!” “Achoo!”

Master Hand ignores the chorus of sneezes that start up and simply orders everyone to get back to work. As the Miis trudge back to their jobs, Master Hand looks around to make sure everything is proceeding smoothly… and spots his brother floating a little distance away. He appears to be fixated on something on the horizon - or perhaps he’s staring into space. They’re both the same thing, aren’t they? Nevertheless, Master Hand floats over to him.

“Crazy, you shouldn’t idle in the rain like this. You’ll catch a cold.”

“The rain can’t hurt me, brother,” Crazy Hand says calmly, still fixated on the skyline. “It is only water.”

Master Hand sighs. “Perhaps, but surely there are better places to zone out? What are you even looking at?”

“Brother, where is

your

umbrella!?” Suddenly, Crazy turns to address his bro directly. “You come to me asking about MY rain etiquette, but where is yours??”

“I’m wearing a hat!”

“A construction hat is NOT proper handwear for the rain.”

He is right, but Master Hand refuses to admit that.

“Workplace safety takes priority over protection from, as you put it, ‘just water’.”

Crazy Hand scoffs. “I beg to differ! I would argue that rainwear is an element of workplace safety. That is why I do not have any. I am not working.”

Master Hand sighs once again. “That brings us back to the question I asked earlier: what

are

you doing out here?”

His brother turns to regard the horizon again. “I’m searching.”

“For…?”

“The sacrifices we need to perform the ritual to repair the mansion.”

“...Nevermind. Forget I asked anything.” Master Hand cannot tell if his brother is joking or if he is simply saying something absurd to dodge the question, but it’s clear he doesn’t want to talk about it. His brother is usually

very

enthusiastic to discuss whatever is on his mind, but if he doesn't want to today then…

…actually, no. He MUST know. Master Hand can’t stand not knowing something like this!!!

“Crazy, I demand you tell me what’s plaguing you.”

“...you really wanna know?”

“Yes!”

“You really REALLY wanna know?”

“Yes!”

Crazy Hand rubs his fingertips together in a contemplative motion while Master Hand waits impatiently. His brother finally turns back towards him, and…

“QUACK!”

Master Hand jolts from surprise as his brother quacks

right in front of him,

opening his palm to mimic a duck’s bill. Crazy Hand starts snickering and floats away, leaving his bro NO CHOICE but to give chase!

“H-How dare--?! Crazy! Get back here this instant!”

“Weeheeheehee! You’ll never catch me alive!”

This continues far longer than it has any right to. The Miis are able to sneak an extra long break when they notice their boss is preoccupied with childishly chasing his brother around the property. The chase goes on for hours and involves a lot of flinging projectiles back and forth. There are potholes everywhere from magic bullets. Lasers have scorched the earth. Some might argue that the two of them are making a worse mess than Ridley did. These antics go on and on until… the rain stops.

“Hey!” Crazy Hand notices before his brother does, stopping in his tracks to remark on the phenomenon. “It stopped raining!”

“What?” Master Hand looks upwards to see the clouds thinning. The sky even seems to be getting brighter. “How peculiar… I was sure it would rain until we finished repairing the mansion.”

“Yessss!” Crazy does a triumphant fist pump. “My plan worked!”

“Your plan?”

“Mm-hm. I was sending telepathic thoughts to the Host and asked them to stop feeling angry and not to kick us out. And it worked! I didn’t even KNOW I had telepathy! I should try sending messages to other worlds…”

As Crazy Hand floats off, rambling about all the famous people he wants to talk to, Master Hand sighs and stares at the sky. It’s still cloudy and the light is dim, but… it’s a start.

Thank the

stars

the Smashers have taken such a liking to the Host already. Now if only everyone could butter them up enough to prevent the penalties from increasing…

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“I see… thank you for your help, Yoshi.”

“Yup yup, any time!”

The green dino watches as a very tired-looking Robin makes his way back inside the mansion. What was that all about? The silver-haired boy just came up to him and started asking if he had any blue relatives that work in business. What kind of question is that?! There’s are plenty of blue Yoshis and plenty of Yoshis with jobs! How is he supposed to keep track of them all?!

That’s not even the weirdest thing to happen today. Apparently someone stole the Blue Falcon and crashed it in the forest. Captain Falcon seemed pretty upset about that. He’s been playing detective all morning with Leaf to find out what happened. And! AND! There are tons of damages on Luigi’s home that weren’t there yesterday! And a bunch of Smashers were injured this morning! Isn’t that crazy? Sounds like something suspicious happened last night.

Yoshi is brought out of his relaxation when his stomach starts to growl. Oh, looks like it’s time for brunch! Easily shaking off all his prior thoughts, he gets up from his relaxing spot on the grass and heads inside to the kitchen. Time to eat some yummy, yummy fruit!

He arrives in the kitchen. On the table, in the fridge, in the freezer… no matter where he looks, there is no fruit.

This is the worst day ever.

Someone must have stolen it during the night. That’s the only explanation! Briefly, Yoshi is overcome with the desire to hunt the perpetrator down and teach them a lesson… but they are just sooooo hungry. They need to EAT. Where can a guy find as much fruit as he desires?

…Oh! That’s so easy! He can just go back to his home island!

Yoshi rushes out of the mansion, a plan in mind. He spots Toad reading a book by the royal bus and dashes over to him.

“Toad, I need you to drive me to Toad Town PRONTO!”

The little mushroom guy puts down his book. “Huh? Sure, but is something wrong?”

“I need to get to town so I can ride the whale back to the Yoshi island and eat brunch because there’s NO fruit left here. I checked all over and it’s all gone!”

Toad blinks, looking a bit unimpressed. He finally sighs and gets up. “Okay, I’ll take you there. But let me call the princess to see if she needs to go to town too. I can’t just drive you around alone unless I know FOR SURE no one else needs the bus!”

Yoshi twiddles his thumbs as he waits. Turns out Peach

does

want to go to town, so he has to wait for her to show up. After about half an hour, a small crowd of people wanting to get on the bus had gathered. Yoshi speaks to none of them, too preoccupied with Hunger Thoughts. However he does overhear Bowser inviting the Host to a tour of his castle. It’s hard

not

to overhear something like that when several other Smashers start yelling over him to invite the Host to do anything else and then break out into an all-out brawl on the lawn when none of them can agree on who gets to spend time with them today. Why does everyone wanna hang out with the Host so badly today? They don’t even have fruit trees in their home world. …Maybe THEY’RE the thief who stole all the fruit! Ooogh, yeah, that’s definitely gotta be it--

“Hello Yoshi!” Isabelle greets, approaching with Dark Samus at her side. Yoshi gives them both a nod of acknowledgement - though he focuses more on Isabelle because the black-and blue armoured Smasher is

a little scary.

“We heard you’re going home to your island… is it okay if we come too? I’ve always wanted to visit!”

“Sure.”

He has no reason to say no. Isabelle beams while the armoured creature beside her makes no motions whatsoever.

“Yippie, oh I’m so excited!” She turns and rushes back to a few of the others, DS following her silently. “He said we can go with him!”

The Smashers she was addressing - Incineroar, Shulk, Lucina, Lucas, Pit, and Mega Man - all look pleased at the news. The giant wrestling cat starts cheering and fist pumping. Hmm, well, this is more people than Yoshi was expecting but… as long as

he’s

not the one who has to ride across the ocean from inside the whale, it should all be good.

…And they better not eat his fruit.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Ridley is perched atop one of the chimneys on Luigi’s roof, staring into the distance. What is he looking at? What thoughts are running through his mind? No one knows - and perhaps no one will

ever

know, because after making his presence known, almost all of the Smashers have been too intimidated to approach him. The only ones who dare look his way are a couple of Samus’ friends. Why? Because he let them cover him in beauty products that one night?

Ridiculous.

The leader of the Space Pirates hasn’t realized it yet but: they’re being watched. Also on the rooftop is Pichu, who is cowering behind a pillar as it stares at the horrifying purple dragon. Who are they?? Who is this terrifying monster?? Pichu can’t help but have this burning curiosity inside them. The person who owns the mansion looked just as scary as this guy, but they turned out to be pretty nice, so maybe this scary dragon is the same! Maybe they’re actually a really nice guy. Probably way nicer than whoever destroyed the mansion - Pichu was too scared to go up to the rooftop and see who that was, but they must be the meanest meanie in the whole world!

But… But despite all that… oh, it just can’t do it! This dragon guy just looks way too scary!! As Pichu shakes in fear in their hiding spot, they’re caught off-guard by someone emerging from the elevator. Oh, that’s Wario! Pichu knows about him. Everyone says he’s a meanie and he cheats at every game! Although he can’t see them, Pichu sticks out its tongue as the moustachioed man walks across the rooftop. Wario stops by the chimney Ridley is sitting on and yells up at him.

“‘Ey, big guy!” Ridley turns and stares down at Wario with a burning gaze. “Yeah, you! I got a deal I wanna make with ya, Ridley. A deal that’ll make ya RICH. You interested?”

Ridley does not move or make a sound. He simply continues to stare. Wario gulps nervously.

“W-Well listen up! You did a good job the other night. Blowing up that crummy mansion? It gives me just the distraction I need to rob the place!” Wario scratches his nose and adopts a smug look. “So what do ya say? If you do that again for me so I can steal their treasure, I’ll split it with ya. You can have five percent of whatever I nab.”

Suddenly, Ridley leaps down and grabs Wario, slamming him against the side of the chimney. Shards of brick chip off from the impact and clatter onto the rooftop. Wario squeaks in fear as the dragon glares at him dead in the eyes and makes a snarling sound.

“O-Okey I get it! Y-You can have ten percent!”

The vicegrip tightens.

“T… Twenty percent?”

Ridley lifts his free hand, waving his claws threateningly.

“C-C’mon man! You gotta give it to me straight! Tell me how much ya want!”

Ridley brings his claws closer, right up to Wario’s face. It is at this point the greedy man realizes the space dragon’s claws are painted the colours of the rainbow. Despite the situation, he can’t help but snort.

“Hey Ridley, yer lookin’ pretty cute there. You let the girls give you a makeover?” The grip gets tighter. “O-Okay okay! What do you want me to say?? You want me to say gay rights are people rights?? I’ll-a say it! Cuz they are! Even

I’m

not a bad enough guy to disagree with that!”

Satisfied, Ridley’s mouth curls into a malicious grin. Now bored with Wario, he throws him off the mansion at full force, sending him flying into the distance. The man’s terrified screams slowly fade out as he flies further and further away. Ridley takes a moment to admire his rainbow claws before deciding he’s done idling, and spreads his wings to fly off in search of something to do. As he flies away, Pichu comes out from its hiding spot and watches the dragon go in awe.

The dragon guy is still REALLY scary… but they beat up Wario, so they

must

be a good guy, right???

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“So you’re saying they’ve had this stomach pain for two days now?” Dr. Mario asks as he walks down the hall with Lucina and Ryu. The swordswoman nods.

“Yes, ever since we visited Yoshi’s island. There was a fruit eating contest and, well…”

“Hmm, this could be serious!” the doctor says. The three of them reach the makeshift infirmary and go inside, where Incineroar is lying curled up on a table with a blanket on it. Both Sonic and the Wii Fit Trainer herself are also in here, with the latter trying to coach the big cat into doing some stretches.

“C’mon, stretch out those abdominals. Remaining sedentary could make the problem worse.”

“IT HURTS TOO MUUUUUCH!”

Incineroar roars.

“Don’t worry Incineroar,” Ryu says calmly. “We’ve brought the doctor.”

“I DON’T LIKE DOCTOOOORS!”

The cat Pokemon hides its head under the pillow.

Dr. Mario sighs and approaches the table with a chipper voice. “Hello Incineroar! It’sa nice to meet you, Imma here to make that pain go away.”

Incineroar growls - a mixture of pain and defiance. Sonic sighs and speaks up when it’s clear the cat is not going to cooperate: “C’mon big guy! Listen, it’s not a real doctor: it’s just Mario, okay?”

Dr. Mario gives the hedgehog a somewhat unamused look. “I

am

a real doctor. That’s why Imma called

Doctor

Mario! I have a PhD and everything to prove it--”

“Hold on Mario,” Ryu starts, cutting him off. “For the sake of the patient, I think you should just go with it.”

They look to see Incineroar is now slowly coming out of hiding, looking absolutely pathetic as they turn around to face everyone.

“Mario… you gotta help me man. It hurts so much…”

The doctor sighs and grabs his stethoscope from around his neck. “OK, Imma see what I can do.”

The other four watch with bated breath as Dr. Mario performs a variety of simple tests on the Pokemon. He checks its heartbeat… takes a gander at the back of its throat… shines a light in its ears…

“Hey Mario, are you sure you know what you’re doing?” Sonic asks impatiently as Dr. Mario bops Incineroar’s knees with a tiny hammer. “None of this looks relevant to why its stomach hurts.”

“Just be patient,” the doctor replies, and Sonic just rolls his eyes.

“I really hope they’re okay…” Lucina mumbles. It’s not like the two of them are anything close to friends, but she simply can’t stand to see it in so much pain…

Finally, Dr. Mario finishes his examination and takes out a bottle of pills from one of his coat pockets.

“Just take one of these and the pain should go away within one hour!”

Desperate, Incineroar is practically shaking as the doctor pours one small blue-and-yellow pill into their hand. The wrestling Pokemon immediately tosses the pill into its mouth, swallowing it loudly. It then lies back down and waits for it to take effect.

“Wait,” Wii Fit Trainer says before the Pokemon can curl up again. “Keep your body straight and focus on your breathing. That should help the medication work faster.”

Incineroar nods eagerly and does just that, no longer stubborn now that Mario has given him the cure to his ailment. As Dr. Mario is packing up all his tools, Lucina addresses him, unable to withhold her curiosity.

“So what was wrong? What did you give them?”

Dr. Mario looks up at her and then at Sonic and Ryu, who are also looking at him with the same interested expression.

“An allergy pill. Incineroar is allergic to melons.”

He then unceremoniously leaves the room without further explanation, leaving the others to stare at the door in astonishment. Sonic is the first to break the silence.

“Maybe you guys can tell me if I’m wrong, but I DON’T think that’s how that works.”

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

King K. Rool struts through Toad Town, feeling like a rockstar. Finally, his years of hard work has paid off: he’s been accepted into Smash! After spending a few days getting to know the other competitors - introducing himself to all of the young’uns and whatnot - the crocodile decided it was finally time to meet his adoring fans. People have waited over a decade to see him return to the spotlight! He may as well grace his loving supporters with an opportunity to get autographs and photos from him while he still has the free time. Heaven knows once the tournament starts, he’s going to be so incredibly busy! Ho ho ho!

…But something is amiss. He walks through Toad Town and yet… no one approaches him! Do they not recognize him? No, that cannot be, he’s wearing his crown and signature cape. Perhaps everyone is too intimidated by him. Yes, that must be it. They must be

petrified

with

excitement

at the sight of someone as iconic as he. Maybe he should set up a table… get a sign that says “FREE AUTOGRAPHS” or something of the like--

“GAGHK!” K. Rool is caught off guard by a soccer ball smacking him in the head. He whirls around to see a group of young Toads running over to him.

“Sorry mister!” says the red Toad. “Can we have the ball back?”

Huffing and unable to control himself, K. Rool kicks the ball as hard as he can and sends it flying a few blocks down. The kids all look disappointed and angry.

“Ugh, weird old Koopa,” the blue Toad grumbles as they all walk off to find their ball. K. Rool is appalled by this. Now he understands why no one is clamouring for pictures.

The youth of today don’t know who he is!!!

It seems his decade-long disappearance from the limelight had deeper repercussions than he thought. It was foolish of him to assume parents would raise their kids RIGHT by showing them all the classic movies he’s starred in. Yes, it’s the parents’ fault. Although… this doesn’t solve his dilemma…
K. Rool lets out a dramatic cry of agony straight to the sky.
“Isn’t there anyone around here who wants my AUTOGRAPH???”

He attracts stares, but no one comes forth. None of these Toads seem to recognize him. How… how can this be… Ten years isn’t that long, is it? Surely there must be… someone in this town who remembers him…

“I’ll take an autograph.”

The crocodile gasps and whirls around to face the voice. At first he sees no one, but then he shifts his gaze downwards slightly and sees… none other than Pac-man smiling up at him.

“Oh… oh! Mister Pac-man it is SUCH an honour.” K. Rool eagerly shakes the iconic yellow sphere’s hand. The Pac's smile doesn't budge, happy to see there are still kids who are excited to meet someone as old as he is. It is at this moment King K. Rool notices Pac-man is holding a boxset for the DKC show. “I knew someone of your calibre would have IMPECCABLE taste. Allow me to sign that for you.”

He giddily takes the boxset and signs the cover in the permanent marker he brought with him, doing his signature in the way he’s practiced a hundred times. Pac-man is still smiling when it’s handed back to him. He looks at the autograph, satisfied, before looking back up at the crocodile with a grateful nod. K. Rool suddenly starts to feel bashful.

“Now mister Pac-man, if you don’t mind… could you perhaps sign something for me too?”

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

The Smash Lounge - #girl-power

-November 6, 2018-
Goddess Of Good PranksHey @Triforce_of_WisdomGot something you might be interested in ;)Zel ❀ Oh dearThis better not be what I think it isGoddess Of Good PranksIf what you think it is is a blessing from the Pranking Goddess, then you’re right.Zel ❀ Oh that’s not at all what I was expecting lolTell me thenGoddess Of Good PranksOh? What were you thinking I was talking about?Anyways,So it seems the silly boys haven’t yet retaliated for our mischief during the sleepover.isabelle!oh no!! more pranks???i feel like we might’ve gone too far last time… >_<❤️🎵I beg to differ! I believe we should have done even worse.isabelle!i really don’t think link was a spy though :(Goddess Of Good PranksSo true bestieAnyways. Zelda.I think you should use your Sheik account to request a new private channel.Gather everyone at Pit’s sleepover into that channel.And persuade them to start scheming against us.Zel ❀Oh that is quite deviousAnd then I suppose I relay the plans to you all before they can act upon them?Goddess Of Good PranksExactly.They’ll all go for it, I just know it.Whenever I ask Pit to do something these days, he’s not as enthusiastic about it.He must keep thinking about the story V told him, about how we forced them to do all that stuff.I’m sure he’s not the only one thinking about it! :)☄️Perhaps you should be a bit more careful, Palutena.If Pit is so attached to our Host that he’s doubting his loyalty to you…Goddess Of Good PranksPsshh, Pit? Turn on me? Never.BayonettaIt would be quite the sight though, wouldn’t it? If he turned his back on his goddess⭐ koiby!!!!! ⭐opoouyyuyoGoddess Of Good PranksThank you Kirby. I agree wholeheartedly.So Zel? You up for it?Zel ❀Already sent the request to Crazy Hand
The Smash Lounge - #sleepover-scheme-team

Welcome to #sleepover-scheme-team! This is the start of the #sleepover-scheme-team private channel.

-November 6 2018-
SheikGood afternoonRoy (╯°Д°）╯︵🔥uhhhh ?_? hi???CloudHelloSuper Duper Mario!! 🍄ohhhh well hello Sheik! Is everything OK?THE NEXT PWE CHAMPION!!!!😈ARE WE FIGHTING???I LL ACCEPT YOUR CHALLENGE ANY TIME ANY WHERE 😈SheikNot quiteI’ve been feeling troubled about what happened a few days agoRichter BelmontWhat is this new chatroom? I do not remember seeing it last time I looked at this place!CloudIt’s newSheikI just asked Crazy Hand to create it so I could address you allShulkUmmm sorry when you say a few days ago what do you mean?Are you talking about when we visited Yoshi’s island? Or something elseTHE NEXT PWE CHAMPION!!!!😈I TOLD YOU I WOULD HAVE WON THAT FRUIT EATING COMPETITION IF I DIDN’T GET A TUMMYACHE !!!!!!👿SheikNoI’m talking about Pit’s slumber party on the first dayMEGA MAAAAAN!I’ve been really upset about it too I can’t believe rid Lee ruined it ☹️Super Duper Mario!! 🍄Mega man?oh ! I forgot you two switched names, never mind!MEGA MAAAAAN!Yes I’m pit SheikI’m more talking about what the ladies didManipulating someone into spying on usRoy (╯°Д°）╯︵🔥OH YEA i’ve been mad about that too!!!!!!marth and i were just talking about it like its a new low for themi cant believe theyd do something like that >_<Falco 🔫What the heck is thisI thought I muted all these channels WHY does my phone keep going off??CloudNew channelRichter BelmontThis is a new channel!Falco 🔫Hold on I’m reading upWe planning some sweet revenge on the girls?SheikThis is what I’ve been asking about, yesFalco 🔫Sign me up.I just KNOW they’re behind the Ridley thing.SheikExcellentHow about the rest of you? @MarthAltea @ike101705 @PowerofAura @xXultimateLifeform @HeroOfHyrule97 @StrongestWarrior1 @pittoo666Falco 🔫Don’t expect anything from Pit 2, I don’t think I’ve EVER seen him talk on hereMEGA MAAAAAN!I keep telling him about the cool apple I use but he doesn’t listenRoy (╯°Д°）╯︵🔥oh marth  is with me im telling him what u guys r sayingRichter BelmontApple?CloudApp I presumeMEGA MAAAAAN!Yeah appleSuper Duper Mario!! 🍄I would not be surprised if dark Pit is too embarrassed to use a screen reader !Prince MarthYes I have been reading along, like Roy said.Falco 🔫Man someone needs to teach you kids how to readMEGA MAAAAAN!Lady pal a tin said it’s OK if we just use voice to text because it’s faster than teaching usRichter BelmontHmm. I think it would be beneficial if you learned though… Perhaps I can try to teach you?MEGA MAAAAAN!Oh really wow that would be great thanks RickPrince MarthI would also like to get back at the girls for the other night.I keep seeing the Host with them and I’m concerned they are accompanying them against their will.LucarioHave they appeared to be unhappy as of late?Prince Marth…NoFalco 🔫Hey I didn’t want to say it before butI think them being forced into it was part of the schemePrince MarthHow could you say that?Are you saying those tears were faked?Roy (╯°Д°）╯︵🔥youre wrong falco i know them and i know they wouldnt lie like thatShulkYeah they looked pretty real to me too…Meta⚔️KnightIf I may.I am currently at the mall with them and some of the girls who were at Daisy’s party that night.They do not seem to be in any sort of distress.Falco 🔫SEERichter BelmontTo be fair, this is not really indicative of how things were on that night.CloudAlso they could be hiding their feelings right nowTHE NEXT PWE CHAMPION!!!!😈LET ME FIGHT THEM I LL FIGURE OUT THEIR TRUE FEELINGS IN THE HEAT OF BATTLE😈Prince MarthI’m going to have to ask you to refrain from that.Falco 🔫Hold on what are we doing we got a MIND READER in here!@xXultimateLifeform you pick apart our host’s brain recently?MewtwoNo.Super Duper Mario!! 🍄mamma mia! Not even once?MewtwoNo.Falco 🔫?????you’re lying. You’re literally lying right nowike101705HeyFalco 🔫Don’t tell me there’s a SINGLE person who lives at that mansion that you haven’t heard the thoughts of!MewtwoI do not have time for this right now.Falco 🔫HeyHEYGET BACK HEREI KNOW YOU’RE STILL READING THISYOU’RE NOT ACTUALLY OFFLINE YOU JUST SET YOURSELF AS INVISIBLEMEGA MAAAAAN!Wait I know if link was trapped the hole time then maybe he heard their planRoy (╯°Д°）╯︵🔥THATS TRUEPrince MarthLink? @HeroOfHyrule97 Are you here?link!!😳Richter BelmontOh yes I’m sure Link can shine some light on this situation!Falco 🔫Link buddy you must have heard SOMETHINGSuper Duper Mario!! 🍄Yes please tell us what you know Link!link!!>_><_<Prince MarthLink…Please don’t tell me… you know the truth?Richter BelmontIs something the matter, Link? You are not usually this quiet on-line.Prince MarthHe always does this whenever he has something to hide…link!!😅Falco 🔫Let me guessI’m right about the host being in on the whole thing?Roy (╯°Д°）╯︵🔥no there must be some misunderstanding!!!!! >:(link!!no!!!!!!! >_<they told me everything!palu blackmailed them into going to daisy’s partyRoy (╯°Д°）╯︵🔥i knew it!!!!!!!!!MEGA MAAAAAN!No I don’t believe it lady pal ooh Tina would never do thatlink!!they snuck out and came to our partyso we wouldn’t feel badbecause they said no to both you and daisy but now they were at daisy’s partyand then the girls found out and said they’d punish them if they didn’t make you guys play truth or dare 😤Falco 🔫What were they blackmailed about?link!!😞i don’t know…………Falco 🔫So it could have been a lie.Prince MarthWhy are you so intent on making our Host an enemy?Falco 🔫I dunno man I’m just using my head here!I want to know if we should be including them in our revenge plot.MEWTWO I SEE YOU TYPING I KNEW YOU WERE STILL HERENO DON’T STOP, SAY WHAT YOU WANT TO SAY BUDDY. I’M ALL EARSTHE NEXT PWE CHAMPION!!!!😈IF WE CHALLENGE THE SCRAWNY HOST I M SURE TO WIN😈Prince Marth…I think we should eliminate the Host from our plans for the time being, if only for the rough time I am certain they have been having since their home was destroyed.Roy (╯°Д°）╯︵🔥ya and i know they didnt do anything wrong!!!link!!😇 *nod nods*CloudI agreeSuper Duper Mario!! 🍄yes I think we should leave them out of this!ShulkMe tooike101705Me neither.MEGA MAAAAAN!I know lady pal Utena is innocent in all this I know she jokes around sometimes but I know she wouldn’t do something like thisFalco 🔫So you agree with me that the host is probably lying?MEGA MAAAAAN!Um I don’t know about thatLucarioRegardless of your thoughts on the matter Falco, perhaps you shouldn’t badger the person who has yet to hand out the prize for the unfinished competition that you keep complaining about.Falco 🔫…True.We need to find a way to finish that by the way@StrongestWarrior1 Tell the Host to free up their schedule so we can settle this tonightMeta⚔️KnightAlright.Richter BelmontActually tonight will not work for me. I shall be training with my ancestor tonight.Falco 🔫@StrongestWarrior1 Scratch thatBut remind them that we’re GOING to settle things and they BETTER be ready to give me that bigger room!Meta⚔️KnightAlright.SheikWe seem to have moved off-topic.Excluding the Host, what do we do about the girls who are most certainly responsible for everything that night?Falco 🔫RIGHT, almost forgot.THE NEXT PWE CHAMPION!!!!😈LETS FIGHT THEM IN A TOURNAMENT TO SEE WHOS THE STRONGEST😈Falco 🔫Hey does anyone know if you can mute people on this thing? Asking for a friendCloudYou can’tFalco 🔫 They should fix that.Super Duper Mario!! 🍄I-a have an idea!Falco 🔫oh man he’s typin out the accentSuper Duper Mario!! 🍄I believe the girls are still using the same room to sleep in, yes?Why a don’t we rig the room with traps?Falco 🔫That’sGENIUSMEGA MAAAAAN!Oh yeah that sounds like funRoy (╯°Д°）╯︵🔥YESCloudAlrightlink!!i can get villager’s help to make a glitter bomb 🤭THE NEXT PWE CHAMPION!!!!😈AND THEN WE JUMP THEM AND FIGHT THEM😈Super Duper Mario!! 🍄we can set up some Whoopee cushions! Those are always funny👨LucarioKeep in mind that Luigi will likely have to deal with the aftermath of this prank…Falco 🔫Who cares about him? This is more importantSheik you still here?SheikOf courseFalco 🔫Do you know if anyone is in that room right nowSheikI do notFalco 🔫Well can you checkWe need to move FAST and set everything up before they get backSheikI’ll check.Falco 🔫Perfect…SheikIt looks like Dark Samus is thereFalco 🔫Shoot I don’t wanna deal with herThem? I dunno they’re creepy is what I’m getting atAlright yknow what it’s getting late let’s plan to do this tomorrowEveryone get something for the prank and meet in the second floor hallway as soon as Sheik says the coast is clear, got it?MEGA MAAAAAN!Yes sir aye aye captainRoy (╯°Д°）╯︵🔥>:) ill be ready!!!Richter BelmontI’ll see what I can dolink!!🤝Super Duper Mario!! 🍄I’lla see you all tomorrow!Falco 🔫AND DON’T TELL ANYONE ABOUT THISike101705Yes.
The Smash Lounge - #girl-power
Sheik[guys11.png][guys12.png][guys13.png]DAISY!!!!!!!!took them long enough!!!Goddess Of Good Pranks@smashvilleGod You know what to do.KILLAGER🙂💥✨The other CorrinUmPalutena can I ask you something?Goddess Of Good PranksYes my sweet Remara? Speak freely.The other Corrinin those pictures Link said that you… blackmailed our host into coming to Daisy’s party? Is that true?DAISY!!!!!!!!hmmmm yeah that would be pretty CRINGE of you palukinda sussyKILLAGERඞ⭐ koiby!!!!! ⭐ඞGoddess Of Good PranksඞNah that’s probably a lie they told Link to make him feel sorry for them.☄️“Probably” so she says…❤️🎵Why are we wasting our time with this topic?! We MUST plan our counterattack immediately!BayonettaWell that’ll be easy. We could just hide in the adjacent room until they arrive and jump out at them while they’re setting up their naughty little scheme.SheikThat would be the easiest thing to doPeachy💗Oh are you all planning to prank the boys again? You’re all so mean~~~Why don’t you give them a break for once? 🤭Goddess Of Good PranksI’ve been wondering where you’ve been, my dear prankster princess.You have another plan, don’t you? Lay it on us.Peachy💗So sorry I couldn’t join the conversation earlier, I’ve been having tea with Fox and Krusha. It would be rude to check your phone while having tea with someone, don’t you think?isabelle!krusha? DAISY!!!!!!!!OH YEA that’s krool’s first name iircpretty wicked name right? ⭐koiby!!!!!⭐yyagfa11!!!Peachy💗Why don’t you simply set traps in the room before the boys do? So they’ll be set off when they try to place their own~ 🤭DAISY!!!!!!!!YOOOOOOTHATS SUCH A GOOD IDEAGoddess Of Good PranksGenius as always, Peachy.Peachy💗Teehee~❤️Goddess Of Good PranksAlright ladies, we have until tomorrow to rig our room with the most devious traps imaginable.Anyone in this channel is free to come and add your own flair to the room. ;)That includes you too Kirby and @RoboticOperatingBuddy ⭐koiby!!!!!⭐!!!!!!!!!!!!1yayayaw❤️🎵Let’s teach those BOYS a lesson!!!☄️I suppose I’ll help out as well…Goddess Of Good PranksOh Rosie, don’t pretend you don’t enjoy our divine retribution.☄️I don’t remember ever saying I didn’t…SheikGive me a few minutes to let me finish what I was doing before you so rudely interrupted me with your evil scheme and I’ll be there in a jiffGoddess Of Good PranksActually, I believe it’s pronounced “Giff”.The other Corrinand you don’t deny that this is an evil scheme…Goddess Of Good PranksOh? What’s this… what’s happening to me…Morrigyn, Goddess Of Evil PranksHehehehe! Looks like it was I, Morrigyn, all along!The other CorrinOk..KILLAGER💀Morrigyn, Goddess Of Evil PranksCome, Death! Come, Remara! We must head to the scene at once!The other Corrin…sure. on my waySamus Aranwtf palu lmao

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Nope, that’s it. She can’t take it anymore. Samus really thought she could just enjoy another fun day of dunking on the boys, but that’s getting harder and harder to do every single day. Not the actual dunking part - that’s easy, the guys fall for it every time. Well, Shulk getting a vision of the prank almost threw a wrench into things, but it all worked out in the end. No, she’s talking about the… the actual

enjoying

part.

If she has to see Dark Samus get invited to

one more

girls’ hangout… she’s going to

lose it.

Ever since she stormed out on Daisy’s sleepover, she’s been sleeping in the woods behind Luigi’s mansion. It’s actually preferable this way, if she’s being honest. Luigi’s place is small enough that with the eighty of them, it’s practically impossible for someone to get a room to themselves. But outside… there’s plenty of space. She’s honestly surprised more people aren’t camping out here. Oh well - more peace and quiet for her! Currently, the bounty hunter is sitting on her sleeping bag and staring into the warm, crackling fire, just enjoying the nighttime calm.

There’s a rustle in the bushes. Samus reaches for her pistol.

Upon hearing familiar clicks and beeps, the bounty hunter calms down. A few seconds later, Mr. Game & Watch emerges from the woods and says hello.

“Hey GW.” Samus nods in greeting. “What’cha doing all the way out here?”

Mr. Game & Watch sits down on the ground near the fire. He’s just here to hang out.

“Fine by me,” Samus responds, releasing her weapon and relaxing once again. They speak for a little while - the 2D man asks about all the slime and glitter on the second floor, and Samus explains the incredible prank that she and the other girls pulled off. About how they tricked the boys into trying to prank

them

(Mr. G&W of course knows that Sheik = Zelda) and turned it around on them. Mr. Game & Watch chuckles at the story, always able to appreciate a good jape.

After the tale is over, Mr. Game & Watch asks something else. He asks if Samus has been feeling okay lately.

“Yeah, sure,” the hunter replies nonchalantly. “What makes you think I’m not?”

Well, it just seems she’s not joining in the games as much these days. She’s not tagging along with her friends as much as she used to.

“C’mon, you know me.” Samus brushes off his concern without a thought. “I like these guys, but I’m not attached to their hips. It’s why I picked a room near the top floor back at the other place - I’m not a fan of being near all the action. You know I like my alone time.”

Mr. G&W makes an exasperated beep. He knows all that. But he’s talking about

recently.

Something changed recently that’s making her act like… well, like back in the early Melee days, when everyone was still a relative stranger to one another. Even though she was acquaintances with the original Smash veterans, she didn’t start to really come out of her shell until meeting Peach and Zelda. They managed to bring out the fun side of her, teach her to relax. They taught her that Smash could be a retreat from the horrors back home.

Now she’s serious again.

‘You’re not cracking as many jokes as you used to,’

is what he says in conclusion.

Samus snorts at all that. “Okaaay, no need to do a character retrospective on me. Yeah, maybe I haven’t been in the best of moods for awhile now. Nothing anyone can do about it though.”

Ah. So it has to do with her enemies joining Smash.

“Duh. Who

wouldn’t

be mad about that?”

Instead of offering any advice, Mr. Game & Watch simply tells Samus to vent her frustrations about it. If she wants to, of course. He’ll listen. Samus hesitates for a moment before deciding to take him up on that offer.

“There’s not really much to say. They tried to kill me and I hate them. Ridley killed my parents and now as a reward he gets to join our ridiculous party games. Love Isabelle to death, but she’s making friends out of the wrong people. If everyone keeps treating them like

one of us,

people are going to get hurt. And I hate that I have to stand by and let it happen because no one will

listen to me.”

Mr. Game & Watch listens patiently, making no noises. All there is is the crackling fire pit, chirping insects, and Samus’ haunted voice.

“If only I accepted Link’s invite to his camping trip… If only I had been there. Then I could have found Prime myself and kicked her a--”

Her flat conversation partner beeps loudly, censoring her. Children could be listening! Samus lets out a heavy sigh and leans back against a fallen log.

“I guess I just… hate not being able to do anything. I won’t be friends with either of them and no one else seems to

get

that. I mean, I’m not being unreasonable, right?”

No, of course not.

“Right, of course not,” Samus echoes. She lets out a short laugh. “Feel like you’re the only person who’s agreed with me on this.”

Well, it’s alright.

‘Take your time.’

Maybe things will improve when the tournament starts.

“Yeah… I’ll get to take out my anger when I pummel them in front of an audience.” The hunter sighs deeply once more. “Hey, thanks for listening. It doesn’t really help me in the long run, but it felt good to get it off my chest.”

Mr. Game & Watch says he’s happy to listen to her troubles any time, and then proceeds to cook up some sausages for the two of them.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

As the sun hangs dazzlingly in the clear, blue sky, Corrin sits on an old tree stump alone, gazing over the graves behind Luigi’s home. It seemed incredibly unusual for Luigi to have a graveyard, but apparently it was the family of the mansion’s previous owners and the man thought it disrespectful to move them. Understandable, since he had already been haunted by them once…

Thankfully, even the most chaotic of Smashers seemed to be able to treat a graveyard with basic respect, so none of them ever really came out here. Which made it a perfect place for when you want to be alone with your thoughts.

It’s not that Corrin dislikes being around the Smashers - it’s quite the opposite, really! Regardless of her history or her talents, these total strangers treated her like family… which only serves as a reminder of the family she left behind. How long has it been since she last went home? The melancholic swordswoman lost track of time herself, but according to the Mushroom Kingdom calendars, it has been over two years since she was last in this world… which means it has been over two years - almost three - since she last was in her own world.

She knows that thanks to Master Hand’s technology, she can go back to the exact moment she left… but she can’t help but wonder… what would happen to them if she never went back?

“Oh man, how did I miss this?” A familiar voice shakes Corrin out of her dour thoughts. She looks over to see the unmistakable form of their Host, who is looking over the graveyard in awe. They’re mumbling audibly to themselves, having not yet noticed they aren’t alone. “I’ve been here a week and I’m only finding the graveyard

now?

That’s crazy.”

“It’s… a little out of the way,” Corrin replies to make herself known. The Host looks a little startled, but breaks into a smile when they see who it is.

“Howdy Corrin.” You approach the white-haired woman graciously and sit down on the same giant tree stump she’s perched upon. You were expecting to be alone out here, but… this is fine too! You’re just happy to be away from noisy company for a change. “What’re you doing out here? Just hanging out?”

“Yes…” Corrin exhales softly and turns her gaze to look out over the tombstones. “Do you think that’s alright? Would it be considered disrespectful to use a graveyard as a place to think?”

“It’s probably fine?” You’re honestly not sure either. “I mean, as long as you’re not digging up or dancing on any graves, I think it’s okay.”

“That’s good,” Corrin replies, smiling slightly as she’s unable to refrain from the mental image. “I don’t think you should say that too loudly however - you might give someone ideas.”

You return the smile, and something about it puts Corrin’s tension at ease. “Oh yeah, I could see Bayonetta dancing in a graveyard… heck, she probably already

has.

Multiple times. I think I could see Palutena doing it too, honestly. But don’t tell her I said that…”

Slowly, the swordswoman’s smile falls as she’s reminded of the Goddess of Light. Specifically, she’s reminded of the information she learned the other day…

“Hey… can I ask you something?”

You turn your head to look at her, curious. Eyes shimmering with mirth; a playful smile on your face. Such a mischievous expression would be worrying on other people, but for some reason on you it merely makes the swordswoman's heart flip. “You just did, but yeah go ahead.”

“On the day we came here… Daisy’s party… were you…” Corrin pauses, suddenly feeling nervous to ask about this. “Did you want to be there?”

The smile on your face grows a bit strained. You don’t answer right away. “...I had fun.”

Well, if that’s not the most obvious deflection Corrin has ever heard…

“That’s not what I asked… I heard that Palutena forced you to go.”

“Where did you hear that?”

“From Link.” Well, from Zelda as Sheik sharing a conversation where Link said this. But those details aren’t necessary.

“Oh.” You deflate slightly to discover that the truth is coming out, but you find yourself smiling nonetheless. “Yeah, that’s right. There’s uh…” Briefly you waffle over whether you should tell this to your current conversation partner, but then decide she can probably keep a secret. “So Luigi has this secret room and we were going to wait out the night there to avoid everybody else. But Palutena found the room somehow and said she’d tell everybody about the room unless I went to the sleepover.”

“So you did it for Luigi…” Now everything makes sense. She should have known you were doing it for someone else’s sake… you always seem to be doing that. That secret room was probably also where you went back to after you left the sleepover that night. “Are you… Are you still going along with what she says?”

You blink, confused at where this concern is coming from. “No, it was just a one-night deal it seems. Though I keep expecting her to trick me into doing something again…”

“So you haven’t been forced on outings for these last few days?”

“No?” You seem to catch what she’s implying. “I mean, ahh, it’s weird… When my home was destroyed, I just really wanted to be left alone… but now it’s like I can’t sit still. Maybe it helped that I saw the progress on the repairs and it looked like Master Hand was doing a good job. Also, uhh, you’re gonna think I’m crazy for this, but I keep thinking of ways I can get revenge when I hang out with everyone now… like by winning a game, or getting someone to believe a weird lie… I don’t know, for some reason focusing on that cheers me up and makes me excited to go out more.”

Corrin listens to your explanation and gives a lopsided smile by the end of it. “You sound just like one of them.”

“‘Them’?”

“The others,” she clarifies. Of course, she’s talking about the Smashers. “They’re always trying to pull one over on each other just like that.”

“...I guess they’ve been rubbing off on me,” you admit with a smile of your own, clearly not displeased by this.

“I’m just glad you’re not doing anything against your will,” Corrin finally reiterates, feeling like a weight has been lifted off her shoulders. She was really worried about you after reading Link’s story… but it seems she didn’t have to be concerned at all.

But then why does she still have this pit in her stomach like something is wrong?

“Oh yeah, of course not,” you reply, oblivious to her mysterious inner turmoil. “I think I’ve been doing better at saying ‘no’ to people these days. I’ve decided: no more unwanted sleepovers in my bedroom. I’ve started to realize that it makes the things you

do

want to do more fun if you don’t have to stress about the things you

don’t

want to do.” All it took was home destruction and a change of scenery to develop your thinking into this.

“I could stand to learn that lesson,” Corrin jokes.

“It’s a good lesson! Sometimes saying ‘no’ to something you hate is just as fun as saying ‘yes’ to something you like. I support your endeavours to decline every undesirable activity that comes your way!”

The swordswoman giggles. The longer the two of you speak, the more the pit in her stomach starts to uncoil. “Thank you. Perhaps I will--”

“Heyyyyy! Pikachuuuuuu!”

A sudden call from the forest disrupts the conversation the two of you are having. Ness appears from the thicket of trees and he smiles when he spots you two.

“Hi guys!”

“Hey Ness,” you respond amicably. “Something happen?”

“Pikachu’s been stealing hats again.” The psionic boy still has his signature red cap, so it seems the rodent hasn’t reached him yet. “They ran into the forest. Have you guys seen them?”

“Not me,” you reply, then you turn to Corrin. “How about you? Any Pikachu sightings since you’ve been out here.”

“Not at all.”

Faintly, you can hear more voices calling the Pokemon’s name out in the woods. You can pick out Sonic, Dedede, and Wario, but it sounds like there are a few more people out there.

“Well if you see them, can you--” Suddenly, a yellow blur darts out from the trees and snatches Ness’ hat while he’s speaking. The boy gasps as he reaches up to feel his head to confirm it’s really gone. The three of you look up to see Pikachu, sitting on a tree branch and wearing a stack of six hats while it carries Ness’ cap in its mouth. The yellow mouse snickers and throws the cap into the air to add it onto its stack. Then it darts back off into the woods by leaping through the trees.

“Pikachu, no!” Without hesitation, Ness gives chase. Unable to resist this golden opportunity for vengeance against the horrible little creature that has broken so many of your priceless decor in its games, you leap to your feet and start to follow them as well.

“I’m gonna help!” you shout to Corrin with a huge grin on your face. “See ya later!”

The most Corrin can do is awkwardly wave before you’ve taken off running. She is once again left alone in the graveyard with only her thoughts.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Diddy Kong has had a rough time this past week. He barely managed to get his Xbox One out of the collapsing mansion - which was the most important thing - but if he knew Luigi’s biggest TV was only 32 inch, he would have tried to save his own TV too! To make matters worse, he keeps getting chased around from room to room saying he’s playing his games “too loud”. Blame Luigi for not having soundproof walls! Sheesh.

Today he’s managed to set up shop in the tea room on the second floor. He WAS in the wrecked room just down the hall, figuring no one else would want to hang out in a room filled with holes and busted furniture, but he was told to get out so they could “fix” it. Whatever man. He’s sure someone’s gonna chase him out of this room too, but at this point the chimp is just making a STATEMENT.

As he’s mowing down scrubs online with perfect 360 no-scope headshots, Diddy misses someone opening the door.

“Yo Diddy!”

calls out DK from the doorway.

“Can you turn it down? Everyone can hear you from the other side of the mansion.”

“No way DK, I can’t hear the game if I turn it down!”

“Then this game is bustin’ your ears, little man! Come on, just a little bit. I think the explosions from your game are starting to put people on edge.”

Psh, then maybe people should get less SENSITIVE! Heyooo! Diddy completely ignores his uncle, still laser focused on the video game. DK rolls his eyes and enters the room fully, taking a few minutes to search through the discarded snack bags. He finally finds the remote and turns down the TV by about 20 notches.

“Hey!”

“See, you can still hear it just fine!”

DK puts down the remote and turns to leave the room.

“Anyways, we’re gonna play Twister downstairs. You should come join us! It’ll be fun.”

But the ape is ignored. DK sighs and leaves the room. As he’s walking back downstairs, he hears the game get louder again. Ugh, this is why they don’t room together anymore…

Time passes. Diddy wracks up one heck of a killstreak for himself. The door opens once again.

“So this is where the racket is coming from.” In walks Wolf, who stares at the impromptu gamer setup Diddy has going on in here. The chimp doesn’t acknowledge him - maybe he didn’t even hear him walk in - so Wolf walks to the other side of the room to grab some tea utensils. The space pilot manages to withstand the noise long enough to brew himself a cup of tea, which he stirs as he stares at the TV screen. Diddy loses the match and lets out a big swear as he aggressively slams down his controller. Wolf chuckles.

“Got one more controller?”
Diddy whirls around to look at Wolf, shocked. “You know how to play?” Although they knew each other back during Brawl, the chimp hadn’t yet seen the light that was the Xbox and none of the Smashers owned one. Game night only ever consisted of party games for babies. Wolf gives a nonchalant shrug, thinking of the times he and his team would pass the hours with various ROMs they had pirated. The day they figured out how to get DOOM running on a Wolfen… that changed everything. 
“I’ve played a few games like this one.”

Diddy grabs a second controller out of the mess and holds it out. Wolf downs his cup of tea in one fluid motion and approaches, taking the controller and sitting down on one of the chairs in the room. He wouldn’t say gaming is a hobby of his - not to mention the mess this miscreant has made in here is

revolting

- but it’s more interesting than what anyone else in this sad house is doing right now.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“... so that’ll be all for today’s episode of the Cave Chronicles podcast. We hope you enjoyed our uh, two hour Kingdom Hearts retrospective? That’s crazy, I think this is our longest episode yet… Don’t forget to check out our social medias in the description below - anything you guys wanna plug before signing off?”

“Yeah! So there’s this new game I’ve been playing called---”

Dark Pit flinches when someone pulls the earbud out of his ear. He whirls around to see Bayonetta smirking at him, completely and utterly invading his personal space. The dark angel leans away on instinct.

“Go away,” he growls. The witch simply chuckles and continues to twirl the cord of the earbud between her fingers.

“I don’t see why you’re so hostile towards me. After all, you claim to have no allegiance to your goddess. Wouldn’t it be mutually beneficial if we worked together?”

Dark Pit manages to snatch back his earbud - or more accurately: Bayonetta lets him take it. He sticks it back into his ear. “I’m not interested in working with you.”

“Oh? That simply will not do.” The Umbran witch starts poking and pinching the boy’s cheek to annoy him. “You know, the demons aren’t interested in an angel like

you.

We really have no reason to be enemies.”

“Ugh, leave me alone!” Fed up with this, Dark Pit gets to his feet and storms off. Bayonetta cackles as she follows him, teasing him with a myriad of empty(?) threats and promises. No matter where the boy walks or how much he ignores her, the witch continues to hound him. He even starts running, but he’s unable to lose her even with the help of the twists and turns of the mansion. Eventually he makes it out the front door and starts walking down the steps, having no clue where he’s going but just knowing he’s unable to stop. He knows he’s still being followed.

At the bottom of the steps, he spots Simon Belmont and Ganondorf. They seem to be having a dispute about something.

“... a reincarnation of evil! Prepare yourself, vile beast, for with my whip I shall stop your evil reign once and for all!”

Ganondorf scoffs at the man’s proclamation. “Fine. I accept your challenge. Let’s see if you have the power to back up those words of yours.”

Simon grips his whip so tightly that his knuckles turn white, glaring at Ganondorf with the fury of a thousand suns. This exchange gives Dark Pit an idea.

“Hey Simon!” Although

technically

he’s never interacted with this man before, via Pit’s memories he knows a thing or two about the Belmont before him. “This angel-killing witch won’t leave me alone. Mind taking care of her for me?”

“What?!” Immediately abandoning his feud with Ganondorf, Simon turns to face Bayonetta. Said witch blows him a kiss. “Don’t worry Kid, I’ll send this vixen back to Hell where she belongs!”

Awesome, no one’s told him that there are two Pits yet. That was easier than Dark Pit thought it was going to be.

Dark Pit goes and chills next to Ganondorf while Simon steps forward to defend him. Bayonetta looks amused by this turn of events, not a trace of concern crossing her features. Simon lashes out with his whip and in the blink of an eye Bayonetta bends out of the way and fires with two of her guns, shooting the whip right out of Simon’s hands. Before the famous vampire slayer can draw another weapon, Bayonetta approaches him in an instant and kicks him in the chin, then quickly brings her leg back down over his shoulder to capture his head between her thigh and calf. She only has to move a tiny bit to twist Simon’s spine in a way that has him screaming out in pain.

Well, that was disappointing. Dark Pit wasn’t sure if Simon could

win

per say, but he thought someone as legendary as him would at least last a little longer than

that.

“If you intend to escape, boy,” Ganondorf says to the angel standing beside him as he watches the fight with a bemused interest, “then now is the time. It’s clear your champion won’t hold out for much longer.”

Dark Pit groans and rolls his eyes before taking flight, hoping to get some distance before Bayonetta gets bored and decides to hunt him down again.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“Right over here, if you please,” Olimar says as he leads Greninja down the river just on the outskirts of Toad Town. They pass by Squirtle, who is swimming up said river in the opposite direction they’re going. Greninja gives the turtle a nod in greeting, but Olimar ignores them completely. “It should just be up ahead… what the!”

Up ahead is Toon Link - who was not here earlier - using a stick to try and poke a frog on a lilypad. Greninja leaps close to Toon Link and the boy takes off running, frightened. Olimar sighs in relief.

“Good, he did not scare off the specimen…” The spaceman approaches, standing beside Greninja, who is staring at the frog. “This is the one I was talking about. I was hoping you could ask it what the purpose of its hat is.”

The strange little froggy is wearing a top hat - which Olimar found unusual. He’s never seen frogs wear hats before. There must be a purpose to it! Maybe it hides a vital organ. Or maybe it’s to protect them from the sun. Or maybe it’s just the latest trend in frog fashion. It was impossible to know for sure with his current equipment, so he ran off to fetch Greninja in hopes that they could be an interpreter.

Greninja continues to stare silently. Olimar waits patiently for results. After a few moments, the Pokemon crawls into the river to get an even closer look at the frog. The hat-wearing amphibian does not move from its lilypad despite the small waves that are kicked up - perhaps sensing its froggy brethren means no harm. Minutes pass as Greninja, submerged in the water, stares at the frog.

‘Perhaps this is some sort of telepathic communication?’

Olimar wonders. He did not know frogs were capable of such a thing. He continues to wait, hoping Greninja has a response for him soon. Eventually, Greninja reaches one of their front legs out of the water and gives the frog a boop on the hat.

The waves rock the lilypad gently, but the frog remains unmoving. It croaks.

Before Olimar can realize what’s happening, Greninja suddenly snatches the frog off the lilypad - hat and all - and leaps out of the water. The Pokemon hops back towards Toad Town at a speed that Olimar could never hope to match… but that doesn’t stop him from giving chase anyways.

“W-Wait! What did you find out?? I must know! Please waaaaait!”

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Luigi breathes in the fresh air as he steps out the front doors. The cacophony of noise is but a whisper with the door shut behind him. It’s been a rough two weeks waiting for the other mansion to get fixed up, but he just swung by there earlier this morning and it looks like it’s almost done… Finally, his home will no longer be at risk of total annihilation. This afternoon everyone is playing Just Dance in the ballroom, which is fine and fun but Luigi decided to dip from the festivities to enjoy the peace and quiet outside. Maybe he’ll even go for a pleasant jog today. Yeah, that sounds nice. He could use some exercise after all the running around he’s had to do. Huh? That doesn’t make sense? Well that’s fine. Don’t worry about it.After getting changed into some more breathable jogging attire and filling up a small bag with snacks and a cold water bottle, Luigi begins to jog along the side of the road. Just as he hoped, there are no other Smashers out here. Just him, the birds, the sun, and the cool autumn breeze. He jogs for quite awhile, his mansion property getting further and further away. At one point when he looks back, he sees a brown quadruped jump out from the woods and start running down the road. The creature ends up catching up with Luigi eventually - it’s the Duck Hunt Dog, with the Duck perched on its back.“Hi you two,” Luigi greets as the Dog starts running beside him. Well this is a fine companion to have on this nice day! He was hoping to be alone, but he doesn’t mind if it’s these two. The Dog and Duck bark and quack in greeting.They run together for quite awhile. Luigi’s goal was to make it to the end of the road where it bends before he turns around and jogs back, and now that point is approaching. Just a little more… and… there. Luigi slows to a stop and takes a swig of water. Should he sit down and eat a snack? Hmm, that might be nice. As Luigi ponders what to do next, pacing back and forth to keep himself active, suddenly the Dog starts getting in his way by running around his legs.“Eh? What’s wrong?” The Dog sits on the ground in front of him and barks twice. Luigi doesn’t know what that means. Most Smashers who like to speak in other languages will have their voices translated by the wonders of magic and technology, but the Duck Hunt Duo’s barks/quacks and Ridley’s screams are among the rare exceptions. Maybe they just don’t want to be understood.The Dog gets up again and starts headbutting Luigi’s legs, urging him to keep running further down the road. M… Maybe he just wants a jogging buddy? Well, alright. It’s a nice day - Luigi is okay to run a bit further.It doesn’t take much longer before Luigi realizes he’s probably being tricked. Every time he decides he’s done and wants to turn around, the Dog stops him and nudges him to keep going. At one point, the Duck flies up and starts pecking him. After this Luigi just decides he’s going to keep jogging until the Duo gets bored and leaves him alone.But they don’t.They jog for hours. They travel so far that they make it all the way to Toad Town. They saw the sky change from blue to orange and now, as dusk ends, the sky is turning to dark blue. Luigi is panting as they reach the center of Toad Town - he ran out of water an hour ago.“I-a can’t go any further,” he finally admits as he stops, hoping the Duo will finally show him some mercy. “I-a need a break.”Luigi is so focused on catching his breath that it takes him a moment to notice that the Dog is already happily trotting back the way they came, snickering the whole way. The younger Mario brother groans and starts hobbling deeper into the town, unable to commit to the journey back without some rest first. And a drink. He must seem like a wreck, shambling through Toad Town, but he’s not thinking about that now. Automatically, he makes his way downtown and to the docks so he can relax at his favourite bar this town has: Club 64.Luigi practically stumbles through the door and plops down on one of the empty barstools without a second thought. The familiar bartender approaches and awaits his order.“J-Just a water to start, thanks.”The bartender nods and turns to pour him a glass. As soon as it’s given to him, Luigi downs it in one gulp. His senses begin to return to him.…Is someone smoking in the bar?“You look awful.” Luigi nearly jumps out of his skin when he hears Snake’s voice beside him. He didn’t even realize he was there when he sat down! “I ran all the way here,” Luigi responds tiredly. The bartender brings him another drink without being asked, recognizing he needs it. “I-a don’t think smoking is allowed in here.”Snake doesn’t respond for a moment, taking a drag of his cigarette. “The bartender hasn’t said anything about it.”The old Toad behind the counter chuckles. “Do I have to tell you not to smoke every time you come in here?”“Yeah. Maybe the rules have changed - I wouldn’t know.”The bartender shakes his head. “If you weren’t such a good customer, I’d have banned you from coming in here by now.”“I don’t believe that for a second.” Despite this, Snake puts out the cigarette anyway. In response, the bartender slides him another drink - a drink that is definitely not water.“Hah. Nice to see you boys still come around here when you can go to places much bigger and better than this. Figured you'd get bored of this place when it's the only place on the block that hasn't renovated in the last twenty years. Especially with that new bar just down the road... seems all the kids are goin' there these days.”Snake makes a noise of acknowledgement as he takes a sip of his drink, clearly uninterested in this other locale. Luigi orders a proper drink and something to eat. The songstress Toad in the corner of the establishment starts to sing a beautiful song, putting everyone’s hearts at ease as the moon outside begins its ascent into the nighttime sky...It's a lovely night tonight.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

It’s another wonderful day here in Mario’s world, which means it’s another great day for unleashing the beast within and going wild. Those are the only thoughts going through orange Inkling's mind as she runs through the mansion breaking stuff and biting everyone she sees. Yeah, it’s just another day of being a freakin’ awesome shark!! Hehehehe!

As she sneaks around for her next victim, Inkling comes across an inconspicuous cake. A cake! Just lying there! Begging to be eaten. Well, THIS shark isn’t going to turn down free cake. With a sharp grin, Inkling rushes over to the cake and grabs a fistful in her hand.

“NOW!”

Before she realizes what’s going on, the shark-clad squidgirl finds herself dangling from a rope net hanging from the ceiling. And the rest of the cake is still on the ground! Grrrrr! She thrashes about, gnawing on the rope with her teeth. Several Smashers come out of hiding - namely Fox, Dedede, Ken, and Red with both Ivysaur and Charizard at his side. They all stare up at the trapped Inkling, watching her struggle to get free.

Ken lets out a low whistle. “Can’t believe that worked so well.”

“Of course it worked!” Dedede retorts. “Nobody can resist a good cake!”

Inkling starts snarling, DEMANDING to be let free. Ivysaur’s vines emerge from its back and approach the net.

“So you really think it’s the costume, Fox?” Ken asks. The pilot nods.

“It HAS to be. Took me months to realize it, but she only started attacking people after she started wearing it. There’s got to be a correlation.”

Ivysaur’s vines create an opening at the top of the net. Inkling scrambles to climb out, but is grabbed by the vines, which wrap around her and restrain her arms against her sides. She starts squirming and gnashing her teeth.

“This is terrifying!” Dedede exclaims, sounding more frustrated than scared. “How are we supposta get this thing off her without her bitin’ us?!”

Fox sighs. “I think we just have to accept that some damage is an inevitability. So… who’s gonna do it?”

Fox, Dedede, and Ken look at each other. Red and his Pokemon are focused on Inkling.

“Well,” Ken slaps Dedede on the back, “you’re the only one here with gloves!”

“True,” Fox agrees. “You’re the least likely to get hurt.”

“Aw come on!” The penguin looks down at his hands angrily. “Rrgh, fine! I’ll do it. Geez.”

When Dedede approaches, Inkling starts snapping her jaws at him. The king is hesitant, but then gets the bright idea to use his hammer. He pushes the head of the hammer against her head to keep her away while he quickly grabs the zipper under her chin.

“Calm down kid!” Dedede barks when the girl starts headbutting his hammer. “We’re doin’ this for your own good!”

Once he gets the zipper down far enough, he reaches out and pulls the squidgirl out of the costume while Ivysaur drags said costume away. Inkling starts screaming and crying as if a part of her soul was ripped out. She’s flailing in Dedede’s arms, reaching and making grabby hands for the shark onesie that now lies lifeless on the ground.

“Charizard,” Fox starts, “will you do the honours?”

Red nods at his Charizard and it lets out a powerful Flamethrower on the costume. Within seconds, the garment is burnt to ashes. Also the floor is scorched, but who cares? Some sacrifices just have to be made. At the sight of her beloved other body being reduced to nothing, Inkling suddenly goes limp, staring at the ground in despair. King Dedede slowly puts her down on the floor.

“...Aw man, now I kinda feel bad,” Dedede grumbles.

“Hey kiddo,” Ken says with a grin as he kneels down to address the sad squidgirl, “there’s still some cake left. Why don’t you have it?”

Inkling does not move. There is no response. Ken’s grin slowly falls as he recognizes they just crushed this little girl’s dreams of being a shark forever.

“...Let’s leave her alone for now,” Fox suggests. “I’m sure she’ll bounce back… eventually.”

Everyone agrees and exits the room, leaving Inkling all alone. Once they’re gone, big tears spring from the girl’s eyes and roll down her cheeks. No longer is she the ruler of the ocean. She’s been reduced to a mere squidkid once more. She’s so depressed to rediscover her frail mortality that she doesn’t even want to eat any cake.

…Well. Maybe she’ll have a little bit.

Twenty minutes later, the door opens and in walks Rosalina. She’s greeted to the sight of Inkling, covered in cake, crying her eyes out in front of a pile of ash and burnt fabric. The woman recognizes the colour of said fabric and instantly pieces together what must have happened.

“Come, my dear child,” Rosalina coos in a motherly voice as she bends down and scoops up Inkling in her arms. The blonde makes no effort to try and prevent cake gunk and tears from getting smeared all over her clothes - she simply holds the young girl close and carries her out of the room. “Let’s get you cleaned up…”

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

You practically kick open the door in your excitement.

“Yo everybody! Master Hand said the repairs will be done by tomorrow morning!”

Everyone looks at you and, upon hearing the news, is instantly infected by your cheer.

“YES!” Captain Falcon fistpumps with such gusto that he snaps the crayon in his hand. Before you came in; he, the Ice Climbers, Pichu, m!Wii Fit Trainer, and Little Mac had ripped out pages from a kids’ colouring book and were colouring while laying on the floor. Meanwhile, on the other side of the room was Young Link and Bowser Jr. - the former of whom was watching the latter play something on his PSP. They both look up when you make your announcement.

“Finally!” Bowser Jr. exclaims, and he and Young Link look at each other with mischievous grins. Young Link pulls down his froggy mask back over his face to speak:

“Took them long enough.”

“Awesome!” Popo cheers. “I was starting to get bored here.”

“Yeah,” Little Mac agrees, “I can’t wait to get back to the other mansion’s training room. I was getting worried I’d have to rely on Luigi’s to warm up for the tournament.”

“Oh, but I’ll miss it here!” Wii Fit Trainer voices his

incredibly

unpopular opinion for the room to hear. “It was fun to live in such close quarters with everybody.”

“No way, it stinks!!” Junior snaps. Most of the others agree.

Pichu is jumping up and down in joy at the news. It lands on its colouring page and slips and falls. The mouse Pokemon starts crying.

“H-Hey kid, you’re gonna be okay,” Little Mac says between chuckles. “You’re fine, nothing’s broken. Just walk it off a bit.”

This does not help Pichu feel better.

“Hey Pichu, wanna go eat the rest of Luigi’s ice cream before we start packing?” Nana asks.

This

gets Pichu’s attention and the little mouse breaks out into a smile. Pichu follows the Ice Climber duo out of the room. This exchange prompts Young Link to nudge his Koopa friend.

“Hey, we should get some things ready before tomorrow too.”

“Yeah, let’s hurry!”

The two of them exit the room as well to enact whatever scheme they’ve cooked up. As everyone is leaving the room, Little Mac frowns.

“Hey! What about our colouring contest?”

“Don’t even worry about that!” Falcon says with a grin. “As I’ve been saying, I’M obviously the winner.” He slaps down his picture of a rainbow-coloured dog with flames coming off of it. He didn’t do a very good job at staying in the lines. Regardless, accepting his victory without sticking around to listen to the protests, he gets up and strides across the room to join you, slinging an arm across your shoulders. “Hey, hot stuff! Now that things are going back to normal, why don’t you and me go on a DATE and I’ll teach you how to drive a REAL race car!”

Although you feel the heat rising to your face, you manage to stay composed as you give a sensible laugh to his offer (which is probably a joke, right?) and politely remove his arm from your person. “Maybe another time. When

I

get home, I’m planning on sleeping for a week. Maybe even two.”

“I respect your decision!” Missing your subtle cue that you’d like to keep your personal space, he puts an arm on your shoulder. “You need to recharge your body and spirit before you can be ready for the GREATEST DATE EVER. I’ll ask again… some other day!!”

With that, he gives you a cool wave as he exits the room. Man, every conversation with that guy sure is something.

“Ooh, Jay asked you on a

date??”

WFT gasps, smiling like a teenager sharing the latest gossip. “You should go! He isn’t lying - he DOES know how to make dates exciting.”

“...Maybe next time,” you repeat, unsure how to take this information. “Aaaanyway, I’m gonna go tell everyone else the news. See ya!”

And finally, you also make your exit and continue to rush through the halls to spread the good word. This leaves Little Mac and Wii Fit Trainer to stare at the mess of pictures and crayons on the floor.

“...So what should we do with all this?” Mac asks. Before either of the boys can come up with something, R.O.B. rolls over from where he’s been observing in the corner of the room and starts scooping up the pictures. Neither of them know what the robot wants with them all, but Mac and WFT let him keep them while the two of them clean up the crayons.

Hopefully Luigi doesn’t mind if a couple of them are mysteriously missing… or that others are broken…

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Master Hand fans out a thick woolly blanket and gently places it over his sleeping brother. Stuck to the blanket is a large red bow and a tag that says “To: CRAZY, From: SANTA”. After taking a moment to watch Crazy snore peacefully, Master Hand turns to address the Smashers in the room. They are all too preoccupied with their excitement to notice the writing on the tag.“Now, Santa will be here soon so you all should hurry along to your beds.” Master Hand’s voice carries his usual sternness, but it is also lighthearted and relaxed by mirth. Not even he can escape the holiday cheer. “If you don’t go to sleep, then Santa won’t come to deliver anyone’s presents. And we don’t want that, do we?”“We’ll go to bed soon - promise!” Roy announces, and everyone else nods and murmurs their agreement. He and most of the others looked visibly exhausted, with circles under their eyes and unkempt appearances. A few of them took a nap during the day and thus looked more well-off, but others such as Kirby, blue Inkling, and Red had already passed out on the floor. Everyone else was struggling not to join them.“Hmm, well, if you say so. Ah, I almost forgot.” Master Hand snaps his fingers and a pile of presents appears under the large decorated tree. Most of them are for his brother. “There. That’s my presents sorted. Now, I’m off to bed - I’d advise you all do the same.”As Master Hand leaves the room, everyone mechanically waves and bids him goodnight. A few seconds after he’s out of sight, the gaggle of eager and still-awake Smashers immediately converges, huddling together to see the device Snake is holding.“Where is he now?” Ness asks, sitting on the floor as several others are peeking over his head and shoulders to see. Snake presses a button on the device.“Still a couple universes over, but it looks like he’s making fast progress, so I’m sure he’ll be here soon.”Shulk is lingering back a bit, not quite at the same enthusiasm level as everyone else. He gives up trying to look at the device, unwilling to push his way through the near-dogpile of bodies. “Can that thing really track him?”Many pairs of eyes land on Shulk at once, their faces wearing the most unamused deadpans imaginable.“Of course it can,” Snake replies, as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “People have been tracking Santa for years. There’s no way it’s wrong now.”Shulk looks helplessly at Lucina, who seems to be sharing his expression. The two of them and Meta-Knight (who is calmly drinking hot chocolate on the loveseat) seem to be the only people in the room who aren’t incredibly eager to meet this “Santa Claus”. Honestly, Shulk misheard the name at first and was extremely concerned that a certain malevolent “god” was coming to visit with gifts. He is glad that does not seem to be the case.“What’s wrong, Shulk?” Leaf asks, wearing a smug smile. “Don’t tell me… that you don’t believe in Santa?”Shulk starts to answer, but Bowser Jr. pipes up with a scoff: “Everyone knows Santa isn’t real! Only babies believe in him!”“You sure about that?” Richter asks, leaning over Junior with a sly grin. “‘Cause you looked pretty excited to hear he was close.”The young prince looks startled for a moment - he can’t believe he had been caught!! - but he crosses his arms and pouts. “W-Well… I’m excited cuz when that thing says he’s here and he’s not, I get to laugh at you guys for being so dumb and gullible!”“Well you’re not going to be the one laughing, because he’s real. We’ve met him!” Nana says, with Popo nowhere to be seen for once. That dummy didn’t want to wait up for Santa and said he’d rather sleep and open gifts in the morning. What an old man!“Yeah, I have too!” Roy announces. “He showed up at the Melee event with one of his elves and gave us all presents! It was AWESOME!”“Those were probably just fake Santas,” Junior argues. “Like, my dad used to dress up as Santa all the time when I was a kid, but I don’t fall for that anymore! You guys shouldn’t either.”Roy frowns, thinking. “Well, whoever it was, it definitely wasn’t your dad. I saw Santa give him a gift by hand!” This makes Junior grumble, unable to come up with further explanation.“Kid, Santa is definitely real, and he’s on his way to the last universe before ours.” Snake’s voice brings everyone’s attention back on him. He has not stopped staring at the Santa Tracker™ this entire time. “Won’t be much longer before you can see him for your own eyes.”“Hey, so um…” Lucina awkwardly clears her throat, trying to ask something she’s been thinking about for awhile now. “...Who exactly is this ‘Santa Claus’? Everyone keeps mentioning him, and he’s in all those movies and books… But I… don’t think I understand?”“Pi?” Pichu is also confused, and is only here because it followed Pikachu (who - like Bowser Jr. - insists Santa isn’t real) downstairs. The baby mouse Pokemon has only managed to stay awake this long because it knows snacks and presents are involved.“Santa is just a nice guy that delivers presents to good kids,” Lucas explains, taking another cookie from the snack tray they have - leftovers from the Christmas Eve party the mansion held earlier in the day. There is a separate plate for Santa that was hidden somewhere by Snake - so nobody gets greedy and tries to eat it. “And! He has elves that can make any toy in the world!”“Emphasis on being good if you want toys , ” Snake says. “If you’ve been bad, you get coal. And trust me, he knows if you’ve been bad. So if any of you have been bad this year, you may as well go to bed now.”There are several nervous expressions in the room, but nobody moves. Orange Inkling casually starts wiping off the marker on her snoozin’ blue counterpart’s face.“Ha, check it out! I drew a Dunsparce.” Leaf, completely undeterred by the warning, proudly gestures to what she drew on sleeping Red’s face. The trainer’s face is just covered in pictures and scribbles.Toon Link suddenly conks out, falling backwards onto the floor and snoring loudly. Bowser Jr., Nana, and Ness are immediately around him, each with markers in their hands.“But it’s actually okay if you’ve been bad,” Young Link adds to the discussion, making his way over to join the other kids in drawing all over his counterpart’s face. His voice is somewhat muffled from the gingerbread man mask he’s wearing. “If we just capture Santa when he gets here, we can just take our presents from him.”Snake grumbles before speaking up: “We’ve went over this kid, you can’t capture Santa.”“Yes I can.”“No you can’t-- ”“Getting back to the question…” Richter turns to Lucina, ignoring the kids as they get way too excited about the idea of capturing Santa. They’re all enthralled by Young Link’s plan, despite Snake’s insistence that it won’t work. “The idea of Santa Claus stems from a man named Saint Nicholas, who was a bishop that gave gifts to the poor. Many centuries later, the people dedicated a day for gift-giving in his honour.”“So…” Shulk begins, clearly piecing things together. “This Santa Claus was based on a real person… but Santa himself isn’t real?”There is a pause. Richter’s smile does not budge. “Of course he’s real.” He suddenly pulls Shulk into a headlock and playfully ruffles his hair - albeit forcefully. “Sheesh, haven’t you been listening? Haha!”“I think I understand now,” Lucina says, making no move to help Shulk. Please, somebody save this nerd. “I believe there is a similar figure where I hail from, but it is not this ‘Saint Nicholas’ or Santa Claus. Our day of giving is not called ‘Christmas’ either…”“Well, a lot of people celebrate the holidays in different ways and for different purposes. In fact, the day Christmas wasn’t always celebrated the way it is now… but that’s another story.” Richter has finally released Shulk. The boy takes this moment of freedom to fix his hair. “How about you, Shulk? Your world have anything like Christmas?”“Erm, well…” The blond pauses in his ministrations to smooth out his hair. “...We have a day every year where we celebrate the end of the Bionis and Mechonis’ long battle. There’s a huge celebration, and sometimes we exchange gifts…” He neglects to mention that it took him years to catch onto the “optional” gift-giving aspect of the event. It puzzled him every year why his friends would leave gifts in the lab on this seemingly random day. “Uh, does that count…?”“Sure! Sounds like as good a reason as any to celebrate.”“What the--” There’s a snort, and the Smashers turn to see Falco standing in the doorway. “Geez, don’t tell me the party is still going on. Aren’t you kids tired?”Inkling excitedly explains that they are all waiting for Santa Claus, but Falco just stares at her blankly, not understanding a single squidkid noise. Leaf is the one to explain in her stead.“We’re waiting for Santa, obviously.”“Ohhhh, okay. Yeah. Santa. Sure. Uh-huh.” Falco holds back a laugh. “Hey, doesn’t Santa only come if you’re asleep? That’s what I heard, anyways.”Inkling gasps and asks if that’s true. Squirtle tries to assure her it’s not, but doesn’t look entirely sure about it. Pikachu finally tells them not to worry about it, because Santa will definitely show up no matter what! ...If he was real, that is. Which he’s not!“Everyone, Santa is on his way right now. ” All the Smashers look towards Snake, who still looks normal on the outside, but a quiver in his voice is betraying his excitement. “Hurry, we need to get ready.”Many of the Smashers start scrambling around. Snake orders Meta-Knight (the only one in this room that he can trust) to fetch the hidden plate of cookies (in an inconspicuous box in the study). Falco groans and rolls his eyes.“Seriously Snake, you too? I-- Uh, what are all the cardboard boxes for?”Unmentioned and unnoticed until now, there are about a dozen giant cardboard boxes being passed around. They all have holes cut into them. Some of them even have festive camouflage.“You’re right that Santa doesn’t come unless we’re sleeping,” Snake explains, setting up one of the boxes beside him, “so all we have to do is make him think we’re sleeping.”“And then we can capture him.”“Kid, I--” Snake huffs and narrows his eyes at Young Link, who briefly lifts his mask to stick out his tongue tauntingly. “You’re not getting anywhere near Santa Claus, and I am going to make damn sure of that.”“Wait, you guys are going to hide under the boxes? That’s your plan?” Falco lets out a laugh. “Oh man, wait til I tell everybody about this in the morning!” “Non-believer,” Nana whispers. Lucina stops shuffling around and looks at Falco, box in her hand.“...You don’t think it will work?”“Of course not! One box is obvious enough - sorry Snake, but it’s the truth - but a dozen of them? Santa would have to be blind… AND completely intangible.”Lucas freezes, whispering to himself: “Gh-Ghost Santa Claus…?”Roy overhears him and makes a similar face. “H-Haha, don’t say things like that…! Our plan will work, and NOT because Santa is a ghost!”“Boo!”Both Lucas and Roy yelp in terror, then grimace when they see Young Link and Bowser Jr. cackling behind them. The two troublemakers high-five, and then transition into their secret victory handshake.“Alright everyone, settle down.” Richter is standing in the middle of the room, smiling good-naturedly. “While we’re waiting, why don’t we all share what we hope Santa will bring us?”Inkling announces they want the most expensive and freshest clothes. AND tickets to the next Squid Sisters concert! The prospect is so exciting that she throws her hands up and narrowly misses hitting a passing Ness in the face.“I want a new bat,” Ness says as he effortlessly ducks to avoid Inkling’s flailing. “It would be cool if Santa got it signed, but I’m okay if it’s not.”“Cute clothes would be nice,” Leaf says, agreeing with Inkling. She pauses. “...Do you think Santa would let me have one of his Deliberd? Now THAT would be cool!”Link also agrees with the fashion sentiment. In particular, he is curious about what it would be like to have a hat like Santa’s. It’s probably different from the mass-produced Christmas hats! Would it have any special powers?“ If Santa was real, he’d get me the new Call of Duty!” Bowser Jr. hops on top of his cardboard box and sits on it, smiling smugly. “Dad would never get that game for me. I’d definitely believe in Santa if I got it. But I won’t, so he’s not real!”“Did you write Santa a letter asking for it?” Snake asks. “You might not get it if you didn’t tell him.”“Pfft, puh-lease! If Santa is sooo magic, then he’d just know. ”“Of course he knows, but you need to show him how much you want it. You need to show him what you’re willing to do to get a gift this year.”“That’s dumb!”“I, personally, am going to challenge this ‘Santa Claus’ to a duel once he arrives. Then we may see who is stronger.”Everyone turns to see Meta-Knight has returned with Santa’s cookies. Nobody knows how to respond to his proclamation, instead just watching him as the masked warrior places the cookies on the table and then moves to his cardboard box. As he’s fiddling with the box, Snake makes a noise of disgust and is the first to speak.“Buddy, you can’t fight Santa.” Snake continues shaking his head. “He’s too powerful - there is no way you could win.”“Hmph! We’ll see about that soon enough.”“Am I the only sane one left in this room?” Falco asks aloud, to nobody in particular. “I understand the kids, but--” He gestures to Link peeking at gifts under the tree. “--really?” And then to Meta-Knight placing the box over top of himself. “Really?” And finally to Snake, who is back to obsessively checking the Santa Tracker. “ Really?? ”Richter chuckles and tries to place a Santa hat on Falco’s head. The pilot squawks in frustration and swats it off. “C’mon Falco, where’s your Christmas spirit? Don’t be a Scrooge.”“My world doesn’t celebrate Christmas! This obsession with a fat man in a red suit who isn’t even real is nonsense. I don’t get it!”Roy gasps. “Falco! Of course Santa is real - we’ve met him, remember??”“What are you--? Oh.” Falco smacks a wing against his face and groans. “I hate to break it to you, but that wasn’t Santa. That was Mario dressed up as Santa.”“HA!” Junior says, muffled inside his box that’s been painted with flames.“Wh-What? No it wasn’t, he… he had an elf and everything!”“That was LUIGI.”Snake tries to butt into the conversation, voice urgent. “Hold on, you guys--” “I KNEW IT!” Pikachu throws the box off of himself. It flies to parts unknown. “I KNEW Santa wasn’t real! It was all just a trick! Hahaha!” “You’re… you’re lying!” Roy exclaims, but his resolve is clearly crumbling. “I would have known if it was them! I’m not dumb!”“Well have you ever thought that just maybe… you are??”“Now, hold on you two.” Richter puts himself between a smug Falco and a heartbroken Roy. The kids, Link, Shulk, and Lucina are watching the exchange awkwardly. “Let’s not start fighting tonight of all nights. I can promise you Santa Claus is definitely real.” The vampire killer gives Falco a look. “Right, Falco?”“Listen, you all need to shut up for a second--”“You can’t make me go along with this farce. Sorry to the kids, but it’s better than getting their hopes up: Santa! Is not! REAL!”Punctuating the end of that sentence, somebody kicks the door open, slamming it against the wall. Everybody jumps from the unexpected sound, and a gust from outside blows out the atmospheric candles, leaving the mansion in sudden darkness. As some Smashers peek out from their cardboard boxes, others are frozen in place, staring at the doorway leading to the main hall. Slow, heavy footsteps echo in the silence, approaching, and then…With a flick of his wrist, a purple flame dimly lights the area just enough so everyone can see the familiar red-and-white suit alongside that rugged, sunglasses-ed face.He is HERE.“Ho ho ho, motherfuckers. Santa’s here.”The reaction is instantaneous: everyone forgets about the cardboard box plan and there is a rush to meet with Santa first. Ness, Lucas, Nana, Pikachu, Bowser Jr., Inkling, Richter, Link, Squirtle, Pichu, Pikachu, and Roy all emerge from their places and crowd around the jolly ol’ Saint Nick, instantly in awe of his presence. Leaf, Meta-Knight, and Young Link get up to approach as well, though they linger at the back of the crowd patiently. Snake is peeking at him from behind the couch, while Shulk, Lucina, and Falco are left speechless and jaw dropped.They truly are witnessing a Christmas miracle tonight.“Whoa now, settle down kiddies. One at a time. You don’t want ol’ Santa to take your gifts back, do you?” Everybody settles down, but only barely. “Heh. That’s better. Let’s see who’s first on the ‘nice’ list…” Santa reaches into his sack of gifts and pulls out a perfectly-wrapped baseball bat-shaped gift, wrapped in striped yellow-and-blue paper. Ness immediately gasps, eyes alight with excitement.“Hey, how did you know this was for you? Thought I was supposed to be Santa Claus here.” Santa chuckles before handing the gift to Ness. “Here ya go, kiddo.”“Thanks, Santa!!” Ness starts peeling the wrapping paper, unwinding it round and round… and gasps again when he sees the gift underneath! “Wow! It’s signed by EVERYBODY!” He is not kidding. The shiny new bat is just covered in signatures. All the signatures. Every signature is here. “Thank you, Santa!!!”“No problem, kid. Now, who’s next?” Pulling a box with blizzard-print wrapping paper out of the sack, Santa looks to Nana. “Something for the best damn mountain climbers in all of Smash, eh?”“Eek!” Nana accepts the box gleefully and tears into it. As soon as she opens the cardboard flaps, a reverent “oooh” escapes her throat. Inside is an ominous artefact and a treasure map. “Oh boy, I can’t WAIT to show this to Popo!! That’ll teach him for sleeping on Christmas Eve.”Santa hands gifts to Lucas and Roy before moving onto the Pokemon cast, who have coincidentally gravitated towards each other. As he speaks, he hands out the gifts one by one. “Some kickass shades for the turtle, a new get-up for the rodent--” (Pikachu yells “I KNEW SANTA WAS REAL” as he puts on his pirate hat and starts swinging his new sword around) “--and… heh, a little something for the lady.”Leaf blinks curiously as Santa places a Pokeball in her hand. “What is it?”“Let’s just say… it’s something you can brag about.”She’s confused for only a moment, before her face turns devious as she turns to look at Red, who has been sleeping through all the excitement. “You snooze you lose, right?”“Hell yeah, you got it.” The two of them share a fist bump. It is awesome, and extremely festive. But mostly awesome.“Pichu...?”“Don’t worry kiddo, I didn’t forget about you.” Santa spares a look to the pouting Pichu at his feet before reaching into his bag of gifts. With one hand, he pulls out an impossibly large box wrapped in traditional Santa wrapping paper. The box is not only larger than Pichu, but it is larger than all the kids in the room combined. The baby mouse’s eyes widen at the sight, and it starts making grabby hands at the gift. Santa just chuckles and places the box on the ground, which Pichu is eager to dig into.Most of the kids have now been taken care of. But, there are a few more… one in particular looks quite conflicted on whether or not he should approach.“Expecting something, Junior?” Bowser Jr. straightens nervously as Santa addresses him. With a flash of purple flame, a big book appears in Santa’s hand, and he opens it to a seemingly random page. “My list says you might not have been the nicest this year… What do you have to say to that?”Junior stammers over his words, unable to explain himself. After a moment of listening to him flounder, Santa just chuckles and puts the book away. “Heh heh, don’t worry, I’m just messing with ya. Besides, if you were completely good, I probably wouldn’t be giving you this gift.”With a flick of the wrist, Santa tosses a present at Junior, who catches it with both hands. The rectangular shape is familiar - so familiar that Junior is already losing his mind before he’s even opened it.“CALL OF DUTY!!! YESSSSSS!”As soon as he’s confirmed it - throwing the shredded paper everywhere - Bowser Jr. hollers as he runs around the room excitedly, holding the game case high over his head in triumph. Santa chuckles.“Lo and behold, another believer is born. Hallelujah.” Next... with his Christmas instincts, Santa Claus senses Young Link’s approach and dodges the net that is thrown at him. From the other side of the room, Snake lets out a quiet sigh of relief.“Darn. Totally thought that would work.” Young Link snaps his fingers in defeat. “I’ll get you next time, Santa.”“You’re centuries too young to stand a chance at capturing me, kid. But I like your style, so I’ll give you a consolation prize.” Santa hands Young Link his gift, which he opens quickly. “A little birdie told me you like this kind of thing. This mask contains the spirit of a demon - real son-of-a-bitch, that guy. Made sure he was nice and cozy in there, so he can’t hurt you or anything. As for what powers he can give you, well… I’ll let you find that out on your own.”Young Link turns over the mask in his hands, gently brushing his fingers over the horns and the monstrous face. “Whoa. Cool.” He removes his gingerbread mask and puts the new mask on his face. Nothing happens, but he seems satisfied nonetheless. “Got anything else for me?”“Don’t push your luck.”Young Link shrugs and walks off. He walks past Pichu, who has opened its gift and is now playing with the packing peanuts inside the box. Roy and Inkling are there too, the latter having seemingly forgotten about receiving a gift from Santa.“Little Link to big Link. My man.” Santa tosses the adult Link a box, who catches it with a bright smile. Claus gives the swordsman a cool guy nod, and Link returns it before digging into his gift. Upon laying his eyes upon the content, Link gasps.It’s GUCCI.The cap is brown and velvety with the Gucci logo embroidered all over it. The jacket and shorts were clearly meant for each other - the former being a tan trench coat with the picture of a cat on the back. Meanwhile, the shorts are beige and include tigers and trees with the design. White shoes with a luscious pair of lips painted on each side? Bam, it’s there. And to complete the look: a pair of thick sunglasses encrusted with diamonds.Without wasting a moment, Link throws on the hat and jacket, and then eagerly hops into the shorts, sliding them over top of his pajama pants. The shoes and glasses quickly follow suit. He doesn’t need to look into a conveniently placed mirror to know he looks good. This is the pinnacle of fashion, after all.This is the best Christmas ever.As the Hylian swordsman basks in the true bliss of wearing such a stunning look, the night of Christmas giving continues onwards.“Santa Claus.” Now that the crowd surrounding Santa is gone, Meta-Knight chooses this moment to approach him. “I have no need for gifts. Instead, I would like to challenge you to a duel, so we may see which of us is stronger.”There is a groan from the other side of the room. Santa merely chuckles and reaches into his bag. “First off: you’re getting a gift anyways. It’s in my contract.” He pulls out a rectangular box. “As for the duel, well, I’m sure you know this is the busiest day of the year for me, so I can’t grant any Christmas miracles tonight. However, I can give you a little ticket . Come exchange it for one free duel any time you like. I’ll be waiting.”Santa snaps his fingers and a thin plate of solid platinum appears and clatters onto the box. It is written in some language that is unknown to Meta-Knight. But he doesn’t particularly care about that.“Thank you.” Meta-Knight takes the box and the ticket and then goes to take a seat on the sofa. Hm, he wasn’t expecting to get a gift! How interesting! After putting away the ticket, he opens his present, and… oh, it’s a lovely Christmas sweater! With reds and green, and snowflakes and lights, it... it matches perfectly with the Christmas pants he has been wearing today! How did he know? Meta-Knight can’t help but glance at the jolly red-suited man, trying to regauge his power. Perhaps he underestimated him…“I told you, Santa is too powerful. You’ll never beat him.” Snake is still crouched down here, seemingly hiding from Santa for some unknown reason. Meta-Knight shrugs on the sweater, taking a moment to judge its snuggability before responding.“Perhaps, but what sort of warrior would I be if I did not try?”Snake can’t help but roll his eyes. “You damned idiot. You absolute fool. ”Meta-Knight reclaims his hot chocolate, returning to sipping it calmly. “We will see about that, my friend...”As this was happening, two other dorks opened their gifts. Shulk and Lucina had both been a bit wary opening their gifts, but their tunes change quickly upon seeing what’s inside.“Oh, wow!” Shulk receives a few books that touch on a variety of subjects, such as gods and technologies of the multiverse - plenty of which aren’t found in the libraries of Smash. “Thank you-- uhh, wait--”Santa ruffles Shulk’s hair before he can finish expressing his gratitude. The Monado boy does his best to withhold his disdain. “Heh, no problem, you big nerd. Have fun with that.”Lucina gasps upon opening her gift. It is a cozy, handmade sword warmer. “Now Falchion will never be cold again… I must thank you for this thoughtful gift.” She wants to use it right now, but alas, her sword sleeps soundly in her room.With two more happy kids out of the way, Santa takes a suspiciously-shaped gift out of his bag and begins to approach Richter, who had been watching the Christmas cheer with a warm smile. Noticing it’s his turn, his expression shifts to shock.“Whoa, I get something too? You didn’t have to do that.”“Yeahhh, I did. Part of the damn job.” Santa chuckles and holds out the gift to Richter, who is clearly holding back his excitement as he accepts it. “Never gave you Belmonts much of a thought in the past, but guess you’re the real deal, huh? I’ll tell your vampire buddy to invite you the next time we go for drinks.”Richter’s smile remains on his face, but confusion alights in his eyes. But with all these kids and believers around, he’s in no position to ask for clarification, so he just nods and lets Santa continue to the next person. Ol’ Saint Nick smirks as he makes his way over to the couch, where a certain spy has been camping out--No! Wait! But what gift did Richter get?! We simply must know! ...Well, but isn’t it obvious? That 8-like shape with the long bit… Yes! It’s a guitar! A real rock-n-roll guitar! Richter can’t stop grinning as he takes it out of the case. He is definitely going to play this responsibly, and not at three in the morning, prompting his ancestor to break down his door and beat him up.Yeah. Definitely won’t happen.Okay, now we want to return to the moment we’ve all been waiting for. Let’s do this. Snake and Meta-Knight are still discussing the power levels of various holiday-related characters when Santa Claus appears, standing tall from the other side of the couch. We cannot see his eyes due to his wicked-ass shades, but we assume he and Snake have made eye contact. They are silent.Then, after what feels like an eternity, Santa tosses something at Snake. Although startled, the lad manages to catch it, his breath hitching when he gets a look at it. It is a teddy bear, with an eyepatch and a cigar in his mouth. It is a beautiful bear, and Snake slowly hugs it close to his chest. He can’t believe this is happening.“Th-Thank you, Santa…”Santa makes a sound of acknowledgement before walking off.Almost done! Santa takes the next gift out of the sack and then looks towards the kids still playing with the giant box. There is just a sea of packing peanuts on the floor. Link, Leaf, Squirtle, and pirate captain Pikachu have joined Pichu, Inkling, and Roy in the box. Young Link sitting against the outside of the box in the blind spot, the demon mask covering his doubtless devious expression. They could just be left to their fun, but Kris Kringle over here has a damn job to finish!“Hey!” Everybody looks towards Santa. “I still got a gift for a certain squid girl here. You gonna come get it, or should I keep it?”The Smashers look towards Inkling, and it takes a moment before she realizes… oh!!! She’s the squid girl!!!!!!! With an excited shout, she leaps out of the box and does an athletic Action Roll over a sleeping Kirby on her way to Santa. In her haste, she nearly collides with his legs, but bounces backwards in her attempt to grab the gift right out of the man’s hands.“Heh! That’s what I thought! Here you go, kid.” As soon as the gift is lowered to jumping distance, Inkling snatches it and flops onto the ground, tearing into the wrapping paper like a wild animal. The box proves to be a minor trifle, because she is quick to add her teeth into the mix and puncture the box in a way it probably wasn’t supposed to be opened. The box is shredded within moments, and Inkling holds up her prize in triumph.“Oh no,” Shulk mumbles, with Lucina wearing a similar expression of concern beside him.The gift is a shark costume - possibly made from real shark skin, judging by the texture. The Smasher thought Inkling’s reign of terror had been over after they confiscated her previous shark onesie and burned it, but now it was clear this was far from over. No… it was just the beginning.Inkling is practically vibrating from excitement as her eyes roam over the costume, before finally crawling into the mouth headfirst. She is now one with the beast again! No longer is she a mere squidkid, but a predator of the deep!! Rules are beneath her!!! Once situated the right way up inside the costume, Inkling decides to exercise her regained power on the nearest target.“Ow!! You little--” Falco squawks as Inkling suddenly bites down on his arm. With a few aggressive wing movements, she finally releases him and bounds back to avoid getting smacked, grinning wildly. The little shark roars triumphantly before dashing out of the room, assuredly about to wreak havoc on this most Christmas-y of nights. As Falco grumbles and nurses his arm, Santa chuckles in amusement. The pilot is quick to glare at him.“Don’t think I don’t know what’s going on here! Let me guess - Master Hand hired you for this?”“Hm. That’s funny. It almost sounds like you don’t believe in me.”“I sure don’t - AND I know who you are! You’re just... Bayonetta’s demon friend! Rodin! That’s it, that’s your name!” Falco looks around the rest of the room, where everyone is staring silently. He gestures to Santa’s unshaken face. “Look, he doesn’t even have the beard!”Richter speaks up, trying to pacify Falco for the kids’ sake: “Now now, Santa is magic. He can look however he wants.”“Nah, I get it,” Santa says, surprising everyone. “Little birdie just needs some convincing. Turns out, I have a gift for him too.”As Santa reaches into the present sack, Falco finds himself inching closer despite himself. “Uh… you do? Wait, no, I don’t care - I don’t want it--”“‘Course you do. Check this out.” Quick as a flash, Santa pulls his fist from the sack and he socks Falco right in the face. The bird goes flying across the room, crashing into a pile of abandoned boxes. All the kids plus Link and Snake start cheering. The non-believer has been vanquished! Christmas is safe! All is merry once again.“Okay, one last gift before I head off. This one is for the house.” Santa pulls one last thing from his sack, and the Smashers that stuck around after receiving their gifts gather curiously. In his hand is a very large brown flower pot, apparently already filled by a massive red-and-white seed. There is an extra fancy green-and-red bow stuck on top, with a tag attached to it that is blank aside from a gold imprint of the Smash logo. Santa chuckles at everyone’s mystified looks.“It’s a new friend for you all. Treat him nice and help him grow strong, alright?”Squirtle’s expression brightens up with an idea, and he starts spitting water onto the seed. Suddenly… the pot shudders and the seed immediately takes sprout!Wait, that wasn’t a seed at all…“Why does that plant have so many teeth?! ” Lucina asks, gasping when the Piranha Plant leaps from Santa’s hand and starts chasing down a terrified Squirtle all around the room, knocking over innocent furniture along the way. Lucina goes to reach for her sword but groans when her hand finds empty air. “Of all the nights--! There!” She rushes over to the Christmas tree and grabs a giant candy cane-looking thing before she starts chasing down the Plant, swinging her impromptu weapon wildly. Half of the Smashers have retreated from the room as Piranha Plant continues its Christmas rampage. Santa takes out a cigar and lights it, calmly blowing out smoke as a PK Fire zips by in front of him and narrowly misses a curtain.“Well, looks like my job here is done.” A vase shatters. Link sets off a remote bomb and the remaining Christmas snacks - including Santa’s cookies - end up flying off the table from the force. Santa grabs one of the cookies from mid-air, taking a bite of it as he’s taking out a mask from his coat pocket. Finishing the cookie with another two bites, he takes off his Santa hat - briefly revealing that, Santa is, in fact, Rodin! What a twist!! - so he can now put on the mask of a certain ugly hairy green character. With this mask now secure on his face, Rodin places the red hat back on top of his head and casually makes his way over to the Christmas tree.“It’s time for the real fun to begin.”And that is the story of how the Grinch stole Smash Bros.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“I made this so you would get better, okay? So I’m not leaving until you eat all of it!!!” says the Host, who is stubbornly holding out a silver tray with a bowl of soup on it. Robin rolls his eyes, not even bothering to look up from his book.

“WEE WOO WEE WOO! ALL SICK SLEEPWALKERS WAKE UP RIGHT NOW!!! PLEASE DO NOT CONTINUE TO SLEEPWALK. YOU …”

Unbothered by Crazy Hand’s announcement as the giant hand floats by the room with his megaphone, Robin raises his voice to reply to the Host’s “generous” offer over the noise: “Oh did you now? You made it? Did you fill it with poison? I don’t know what game you’re trying to play, but believe me when I say I’m not falling for--”

thud. clatter.

Robin looks up from his book to see the Host, collapsed on the ground with the toppled tray and soup bowl next to them. The soup slowly spreads outwards across the floorboards.

“Uhh… are you okay?” Nana asks them, getting up. When there’s no response, both she and Popo go over and start poking and prodding the Host, trying to wake them up. “Hellooooo? Wakey wakey!”

‘Is this a trick?’

Robin wonders, staring at the motionless body on the floor. They came into the room spouting nonsense about friendship even though they had been content to accept his disdain up until now. Is this some new method to befriend him? Feign a fainting spell to make him worry? Well, that’s not going to work. He doesn’t care.

“Robin, they won’t wake up!” Popo whines, starting to look a little alarmed. “What should we do?”

“Maybe they have the same cold as everyone else?” Nana suggests. “Bleh, then maybe we shouldn’t get close!!”

Both of them step away, but are unable to squash down their concern. Sighing, Robin rises from the couch and approaches. He’s doing this for the kids, not because he cares if their Host is sick or not. Since he has this cold too, he kneels down next to the seemingly unconscious body without hesitation and puts his hand on their forehead.

“...You’re right. They have a fever.” Is it just him or does their forehead feel…

abnormally

warm? Then again, it’s not like the Host is a regular human - a fact he knows all too well - so perhaps this is normal for their biology.

“Phew… it’s kind of hot all of a sudden,” Popo says, pulling back the hood on his parka. “Did someone turn on a heater or something?”

“I thought this world has the same temperature all the time!” Nana agrees, pulling away her hood as well. “Why is it suddenly getting hot??”

Robin hums in thought. Although the worst of the cold is past him, he finds himself starting to get motion sick the longer he stays here. The tactician goes to stand, intending to just leave the Host here until they wake up or someone else deals with it, but is stopped by… an unusual sight.

In the spilled soup, small bubbles slowly form and pop. As the seconds pass, these bubbles increase in frequency, and it takes a moment for Robin to realize what’s happening.

“It’s… boiling? Here?” Curious, he dips a finger in and pulls it away twice as fast, confirming that the soup is indeed suddenly at boiling temperature. And it is now that he realizes that the motion sickness isn’t as unexpected as he initially assumed - no, it’s because the floor itself is moving around him. He notices this when the soup starts spinning, as if it’s being stirred, and when he looks out further he notices the lines of the floorboards are twisting as well.

All of these strange happenings are only happening in the area around the Host’s body.

…But it probably won’t stay that way for long.

“...They have more control over this place than I realized,” Robin murmurs, putting the pieces together in his mind. With a sigh, he slides his arms under the Host’s body and lifts them up. Ignoring the way his hands burn from the direct contact, he returns to the couch and unceremoniously dumps them there. As he suspected, the floor returns to normal once the body is off it. But now the couch looks like it’s starting to droop, like it’s going to start melting at any minute. Regardless, this should hopefully help slow the spread of... this.

“I’ll see if I can find anyone who can help,” Robin says to the kids. “You two stay here and keep an eye on them. But whatever you do: don’t touch them. Their body temperature is increasing, so you might burn yourselves.”

He looks at how red his palms have become from such a short amount of contact. Instinctively he tries to rub the heat away, annoyed that

he’s

the one who had to deal with this. He doesn’t want to help

them.

…But he should. Because as bitter as he is of the past, he knows that a

certain

someone would be upset if anything were to happen to them. And he couldn’t bear being responsible for that.

“Uhhhh, you okay?” Nana asks, bringing Robin out of his thoughts. Must be the illness making his brain act up. “You don’t look okay either…”

“I’m fine. Don’t worry, I’ll be back soon.”

Err, well, no. No he won’t. He’s gonna tell someone on the Health Team what’s going on and go hang out somewhere outside of this mansion until this blows over. Hmm, and while he's out there... maybe it’s not a good idea considering the state the Host is in, but perhaps checking out that “Polyhedron” thing could be worthwhile…

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

It’s 5am. Byleth walks into the living room and has to do a double take when they see you sitting on the couch with Incineroar. “...Oh, there you are. People have been wondering where you have been recently. Did something happen?”While you do hear Byleth’s voice, you can’t help but have a delayed reaction as your brain has to process what’s being said to you when you’re simultaneously trying very hard to stay focused on the TV. “Hi. We’re watching Yu-Gi-Oh.”Byleth looks at the large screen that the two of you are so fixated on. They haven’t been here very long so this “television” thing is a mysterious object to them, but they’ve noticed it seems to be heavily involved in many activities that everyone enjoys to look at - especially the kids. It’s hard to tell what’s going on today - there are a lot of bright colours. It looks like the human characters are making the monsters fight? And they seem to also be playing a card game? “YUMAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Incineroar roars at the screen, practically bouncing out of its seat. “BEAT THAT PIPSQUEAK INTO THE GROUND!!!” There’s swirling shadows and lights on the screen and a strange goat monster appears. You start booing, clearly as invested as Incineroar is.“I’m so SICK of seeing this monster!” you complain. “He has too many powers! Get rid of him!!”You start throwing popcorn at the screen. The people in the television don’t seem to notice. Byleth stands and watches the show silently for a solid ten minutes, trying to parse some meaning out of what they’re seeing. This seems to be a very important battle, but Byleth doesn’t want to interrupt you two to ask for more information about the plot.There’s a dramatic cliffhanger and the show cuts to an upbeat credits song. You and Incineroar watch it as if in a daze - how long have you guys been here tonight? - and Byleth expects it to be over after the “trailer” for the next episode, but immediately after finishing that, a new episode starts. Neither you nor Incineroar make a move to leave or turn off the TV. “Did you need something, Byleth?” A deep voice enters the teacher’s head and they find themselves looking around the room for the source of the voice. Finally, they notice Lucario sitting in one of the armchairs closest to the exit. This Pokemon had been silent the entire time, so Byleth didn’t notice them until now.“I just woke up,” Byleth responds, stepping closer to Lucario’s chair so as to not disturb you and the other watcher. “I know it’s still dark out, but I don’t feel very tired right now.” “It’s as I thought,” Lucario says telepathically. “Our Host is artificially lengthening the hours of night to watch this show.” “They can do that?”Lucario nods. “I admittedly believed I had just been getting caught up in the narrative and losing track of time, but there’s no other explanation for how we’ve been able to watch one hundred episodes each night…” Yeah, you’ve been bingeing Yu-Gi-Oh during the night and sleeping during daylight hours. What about it??Byleth nods as if understanding and sits down next to Lucario, intrigued by whatever story could prompt someone to warp the flow of time so they could keep observing it. They don’t really know what else to do at this time of day anyways. “What is this story about?”It takes a moment for Lucario to answer. Where to even start? “...Everyone plays this card game, which lets them summon monsters to fight. Sometimes the monsters are real, and sometimes they’re not. I believe their spirits are real and they appear to live in a parallel world to the human world… I suppose you could say it’s the opposite of us Pokemon, in a way.” This only raises more questions in Byleth’s opinion, but they let Lucario continue regardless. On the other side of the room, you are excitedly remarking about how much better the art and animation got. “This part of the series is about a young boy named Yuma, who has this man named Astral living in his necklace - which they call the ‘King’s Key’.” As Lucario explains, it gestures to the screen when what they’re explaining is on screen. “Right now they are dueling in the World Duel Carnival finals against this boy named Vetrix. He’s actually the …” As Lucario starts to explain the plot of the first half of Yu-Gi-Oh Zexal, two of the characters turn into blue and red swirling lights and a different man appears on screen.
“Oh yes, Yuma and Astral can fuse together. Like that.”
A different voice echoes in Byleth’s head - a feminine one that only they can hear: “Huh. Reminds me of someone.” Byleth nods to agree with the voice, who goes quiet once more as Lucario continues to telepathically summarize the show, unaware of the interruption. Meanwhile, you and Incineroar are hooting and hollering wildly as if it’s not 5am and y’all haven’t been awake for an impossible amount of time by now. Everyone seems to be very invested in this show, so it must be pretty good.
“Go, Utopia Ray!! Rising Sun Triple Chaos Slash!!”
One of the monsters on screen performs various slashes on the opponent. Pow kapow swoosh, schwing pow!! This is it, the final attack! The monster goes in for the final slash and just as it connects--!The screen goes grey and all the sound cuts out.“Nooooo!” you whine, and beside you Incineroar is equally distraught and confused. “Why did the video cut out?? What is this!” You throw your hands up at the error message on screen. “DMCA? In the middle of me watching the video? I think that’s illegal.” “I NEED TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS!” Incineroar shouts. “DOES YUMA WIN OR NOT??” “Don’t worry big guy we’re going to see the end of this episode even if it’s the last thing I do. I’ll happily die just so I can see my scrunkly thrive and prosper one last time.” You grab the keyboard from the table and press F5 to reload the page of the piracy site you’re using. The same “this content has been removed because of a DMCA complaint” message is still there.“This is so messed up,” you remark aloud, feeling like a perfect picture of calmness compared to the way Incineroar is freaking out beside you. It’s fine, you can fix this in no time. “Bro just let me see my guys… please…” You go to other anime piracy sites you know of… just to find the same message. Over and over again. Listen, you wouldn’t have had to resort to this if Yu-Gi-Oh Zexal hadn’t disappeared from every single legal streaming service at some point recently.Seriously, who’s going out of their way to take down Zexal of all shows??“What the heck.” You’re feeling a mixture of annoyed and amused - maybe a little delirious as well. Sleep deprivation will do that to ya. “That’s it, I want to see a manager about this.” Before you know it, you’ve typed “who owns yugioh” into the search engine. It’s only after you’ve hit Enter that you remember Konami should be somewhere among the rights holders, right? But your memory doesn’t really matter, because the Internet tells you a different result. A shocking and extremely unexpected result.“...’Mishima Multimedia Studios’.” Byleth quietly reads the company name that pops up on the screen aloud, the words having no meaning to them. But it seems to mean something to you, because after a couple seconds of staring at the screen you suddenly jump to your feet and begin to stomp towards the exit of the room.“I! Am going to speak to the MANAGER!” “I’M COMING WITH YOU!” Incineroar announces, snarling angrily as it follows you out the room. “I’M GONNA KICK THE MANAGER’S BUTT!”  Lucario and Byleth look at each other, mystified.“Do you know what that is?” Byleth asks, pointing at the company name on the screen. Lucario shakes their head, then suddenly yawns. “...As much as I’ve been enjoying the show, perhaps this is a sign that I should rest now,” Lucario gets up from the chair and stretches, suddenly looking a fair bit more exhausted than previously. Understanding, Byleth gets up as well and glances out the window to confirm it’s still dark outside. Perhaps they’ll do some training to kill time? Or head to the mansion’s library? Usually Byleth prefers to use their free time to interact with the other fighters, but that's not exactly an option when they're all still sleeping.When the two of them exit the living room, prepared to go their separate ways, they find you and Incineroar out here. You are dramatically collapsed on the floor while Incineroar is trying to pat you reassuringly. “What’s wrong?” Lucario asks, its telepathy reaching everyone in the room. You look up at the Pokemon with a childish, sour expression on your face.“I can’t speak to the manager because he HASN’T SHOWED UP TO SMASH YET. Aaaaghhhh!”With your current spontaneous hyperfixation stolen from you, this ends up being the last unusually long night in your realm for a very long time.Damn you, Kazuya Mishima… Meanwhile, Robin is hanging out with Ness and Lucas inside the Polyhedron. We don't know how he got in there, but he's gesturing wildly to some near-illegible writings on the wall, trying to get the kids to understand something."...And with all that, as you can now see, this is proof that we're trapped in an endless night," he concludes. The tactician looks like he hasn't slept in days. "I've solved it."Trying to be polite after listening to Robin's mad 5am ramblings, Lucas stops sipping from his juice box and replies: "Um... I don't think you've solved anything? At least, I don't get it at all...""You know we had some paper you could have written all that on, right?" Ness points out, holding up one of the colouring books that the kids brought in a few nights ago during their last club meeting. Robin stares blankly - wearily, even - at the book and then looks at the wall....Look. The wall just looked really good for writing theories on."Listen, Olimar can't get in this place for some reason and he seems to think that if he climbs down the tower, there will be monsters that'll eat him and his Pikmin. So unless you two have any suggestions, I'm going to keep writing on the walls like a lunatic until I figure out how to make it daytime again."Somehow, the kids convince Robin to calm down and they spend the rest of the night colouring in pictures of lizards and fairies.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Sometimes you just can’t help but admire your own work. That’s exactly what you’re doing today, observing the hedge maze you constructed on your property days ago with a nod of satisfaction. You’ve been pretty sloppy with home additions ever since the Smashers started lodging with you because there were just so many other things that required your attention, but for quite awhile now a particular itch had been eating away at you. An itch for a change in architectural aesthetics. …Okay, a hedge maze isn’t really the earth-shattering change you’ve been secretly pining for. But it does make your lawn look less boring. And you’re just so proud of how it came out.“Good morning~!” That familiar singsong voice has you turning your head towards the source and there you see Peach gracefully descending the front steps of your manor. “It’s unusual to catch you when you’re all alone. Perhaps I’ve gotten lucky today?”The princess giggles at her jest and your eyes are drawn to the lacy pink parasol she’s carrying. The lighting from your realm’s skies filters through the fabric to cast a gentle shadow on her person. There’s never any sunlight harsh enough to require shade, so you have to respect her dedication to her fashion choices.“Mind if I join you?” the princess adds as she approaches you. You shrug, seeing no reason to decline.“I’m not really doing anything special,” you admit. “Just… standing around.”“Shall we walk then?” Without hesitation, Peach loops her arm around yours and casually leads you towards the hedge maze. You feel a bit like a gallant gentleman leading a beautiful woman around on a date with the way your arms are linked, except it is you who is being led around by the beautiful woman. My god. Gender stereotypes are truly dead forever.“I like what you’ve done here,” Peach says as the two of you enter one of the maze entrances. She gestures to the leafy hedges, careful not to touch them. “It reminds me of the gardens at the castle.”It does now occur to you that despite going to the Mushroom Kingdom with the Smashers for a time or two, you’ve not once been to Peach’s castle. You’ve seen it in pictures and you’ve seen Master Hand work his tricks to use the rooftops as a battle stage, but not once have you stepped foot on the grounds yourself. That’s pretty wild for a location you feel like you could pretty confidently map out in your head.“The hedges aren’t real, unfortunately,” you explain once you shrug off your wandering thoughts. “I think I’ve told you guys before that nothing can really grow here, right? So these are fake plants. But I hope I managed to make them feel not-so plastic-y.”“They look convincing!” Peach says encouragingly. Although she sounds genuine, you can’t help but wonder if she’s just being nice. It’s hard to tell since she’s usually very kind towards you. “But if you’d like, you can take some of the plants from the castle garden to replant here. Plants may not grow here, but it’s alright if they’re already matured, right?”You’re taken aback by the offer. Somehow, it didn’t once occur to you to yoink florae from other worlds to populate your own. Frankly, you’re not sure they would stay alive in this place, but it would give you an opportunity to study them thoroughly enough to create everlasting replicas of them.  “Is… is that really okay? I wouldn’t want to--”“Of course! We can always just grow more. Besides, we’re friends! That’s just what friends do for each other.”You try to keep a straight face but you’re sure your emotions are plain to see. Despite everything, the declaration of “friendship” still catches you off-guard at times. “...Thank you,” you respond earnestly. “I really appreciate that.”Although you’re not looking directly at her, you can hear the warm smile in her voice when she speaks: “It’s not that big of a deal, silly! In fact, we should try to collect plants from even more worlds for your home! I’m sure everyone would be glad to help out.”“That might be fun,” you agree, your mind conjuring up some of the bizarre plants you’ve seen across the multiverse and imagining how they would look all crammed onto the same lawn. It’ll look hideous, but it’s better than looking like a bland Windows screensaver. “...There’s something I’ve always been curious about,” Peach asks, interrupting your recollection of poachable ugly trees. “You’ve been living here for such a long time and you can leave freely… umm… how do I put this?”Peach looks upwards in thought as she ponders how to word her question without offending you. You give her a moment to think, rounding a corner in the maze as you get closer to the center. Thankfully, you know the layout of this maze like it’s an extension of your own body so you haven’t had to do any thinking with regards to your pathing. Having a feeling you understand what she’s trying to get at, you go ahead and speak up first:“Believe it or not, I’ve somehow never once considered poaching plants from other worlds to replant in mine.”“Is that so?” She seems pleased that you got the general gist of what you were thinking, but her smile still seems a little troubled. “I guess it felt too much like stealing?” You look up at the sky - beyond the brim of Peach’s parasol that she’s holding over the two of you - and think back to your recent old self. “I used to be really worried about affecting the ‘fate’ of other worlds. Have you ever heard of the butterfly effect? I was worried that talking to someone from another world or even just being there would drastically change the future. Yeah the multiverse has like, contingency plans against that by making split timelines or forcing temporal resets - or even just wiping memories of the soul, if the influence was small enough--”You accidentally glance at Peach’s face during your rambling and catch her blank expression. Whoops. This might be too much for the average person. There are even multiversers who aren't aware of this sort of stuff.“A-Anyways, that’s one of the reasons I never really left this realm before you guys came here. I told myself I was going to read and learn everything there was to know about any given universe before visiting it so I would know what to avoid so I don’t mess anything up, buuuut…” You shrug and smile wryly at the foolishness of your past self that came up with that fruitless idea. “Time is pretty infinite, so when you’re trying to study all of it, well… you can’t.”“I suppose I understand what you’re saying.” She wears a thoughtful expression on her face, though the wording makes it clear that she could easily rebuke with a “but” or “however”. She doesn’t do that though, saving you from scrutinizing your past self’s logic and instead looks up you with a smile. “You said that’s just one of the reasons, yes? May I ask to know the other ones?”It is at this moment that the two of you reach the center of the hedge maze, revealing the inner garden you fabricated by replicating the flowers you had received on Valentine’s Day. Really, they were the whole reason you made this maze in the first place. Despite your best efforts, the flowers had slowly been starting to wilt - likely thanks to the lack of natural sunlight in your realm - so you examined them intricately and read a few books and online articles about flower biology so you could recreate them with your abilities. You’re sure they aren’t perfect - none of them came with “roots” in their bouquets so you just kind of had to wing it on that part, but on the surface they look identical. They’re not “real” - they can’t grow or die and they’ll never experience any thoughts that flowers may or may not have since creating life is beyond your capabilities. But they aren’t exactly “fake” either. Or so you like to believe.…A part of you hopes that these flowers will remain after you’re gone from this realm. But that won’t really have anything to do with you when the time comes.A questioning hum pulls you out of your thoughts and you notice that Peach is staring at you expectantly. Man. You need to learn to stop zoning out mid-conversation.“Sorry. Uh, suddenly got a weird case of deja vu.” Which, as you say it, you realize isn’t entirely wrong. Something about the way your arms are linked and the location you’re in… which doesn’t make sense, since this location that you personally made on your property did not exist until very recently. But it’s probably thanks to her question, which brings your mind back to the conversation at hand. “It’s okay, I can talk about it. Let’s sit down.”At the center of the maze’s center is a cute circular table. You and Peach both take a seat, and silently you think this spot would be better if it had its own tea set. But where would the boiled water for the tea come from? Much to think about.“If you’re not comfortable to say…” Peach starts, giving you an out if you need it. But you shrug it off, feeling unusually chatty about the subject.“It happened a little after I… inherited this place.” You pause after that sentence despite yourself, wondering if you should have used different phrasing. But Peach’s expression doesn’t change as she merely waits patiently for you to continue. “I’d actually visited a couple places by then. Just some universes I thought were cool from games and books and stuff. I didn’t do anything crazy, just went to some cool landmarks and stuff…”You’d been so excited to visit your favourite “fictional” universes. You look back on the memory as if your present day self is an onlooker watching a starry-eyed dweeb overreact at the tiniest things. Oh, how young and naive you were!“One day I got a visitor. One of the only visitors I’ve ever had outside of Galeem, Dharkon, and like... the delivery companies. And all of you guys, of course.”Peach remains attentive, her eyes urging you to continue. “She was a travelling fortune teller.” You remember it vividly, but your memory is dream-like because that’s honestly how it felt to meet her. You awoke to a carriage adorned in beautiful fabrics parked in your realm. There was no driver seated where the horses would have been pulling it t'were this a regular carriage, and you soon learned that the woman that emerged from inside had been travelling alone. Even though she looked human, there was something alien and ethereal about her. Her skin looked like it was made of porcelain and her hair looked too pastel pink and immaculately curled to be real. And those eyes… those bottomless eyes that shone like galaxies…“She told me she came here because she saw herself coming here. Y’know, in like a seer way? So I gave her a tour--” Guiding her by the arm in the same way that you and Peach had just been linked, because the woman was blind to what was physically around her. She had informed you of her disability without a trace of weakness with the explanation that her vision was perpetually locked viewing only where she will be, and not where she is currently. “--and she offered to tell me my future at the end. Which sounded pretty cool to me.”The oracle had you touch a crystal ball - which you thought was kind of tacky and almost made you doubt her validity - but when you did you felt a surge of… something. An unknown energy, washing over your body like rain. It wasn’t some cheap knick-knack; whatever magic it contained was something you had ever experienced before. In the present day, the best comparison you can come up with is that it felt a bit like a telepath’s power, except… all over? Anyways, once you did that, she put her hands on yours and although nothing changed for you, she told you the “future” she saw.“She… didn’t see anything.” An unease creeps in you as you recount it, the same way it did back then. “Normally she could use the crystal ball to see futures that weren’t her own, but she said she didn’t see anything for me.”“That’s… so strange,” Peach says with a curious expression, not picking up on the tension in you. “Why would that be?”“She said it’s not that uncommon,” you explain, perfectly able to picture the way the woman’s lips moved as she explained it to you with a picturesque aura of tranquility. You repeat her explanation to Peach but with some of the nuance shaved off: “Some people are born with the power to make their own fate. Or they found a way to break away from it. So she can’t see the future for those people since… they don’t have any.”In what you think was an attempt to reassure you that it was nothing to worry about, the woman had told you how she was confident one of her adoptive mothers had been such a person. But when she explained that she never had the opportunity to check after her mother had been sucked up and imprisoned in The Void, it just served to make your unease worse.“Hmm… I don’t know what to say,” Peach says honestly, a small frown on her face, “but it doesn’t sound like a bad thing to me.”“It’s not, inherently,” you agree, feeling a little sheepish. “She also said that people who have ‘transcended’ fate are really good at changing it for other people. Even stuff that happens in one hundred percent of timelines without fail. Even if it’s something that is always fated to happen, someone like me can show up and… change it.”“I believe I understand now. That does sound like a lot of responsibility.” The princess smiles sweetly however. “But like I said, it doesn’t have to be a bad thing!”She’s right. It’s a force that can be used for good. And you know that if you could perfectly control the outcomes of your actions, it would exclusively be used for good every day of the week.But it’s also a force that can be used to doom universes. It can be used to rend timelines desolate until they become one with The Void, where the best case scenario ending for them is that they coalesce to become something that isn’t unlike the World of Light or the Dark Realm.And you don’t know if you could live with yourself if you were somehow responsible for causing something like that.“...It still scared me though,” you sigh, keeping that bit of information to yourself. You’re certain Peach doesn’t know enough about how the multiverse works to know any of that, and you don’t want to frighten her with the lore drop. “Even if I didn’t mean to do anything bad, multiversal travel can weaken the barriers between universes and it could invite other people in who do want to do bad. Or change things back to how they’re ‘supposed’ to be.” You say that last part with air quotes and roll your eyes. There are lots of extremists in the multiverse who advocate for preserving “canon” and would rather see a timeline rot and decay than have it go off course. While there are plenty of good arguments for wanting to keep fate nice and tidy (hell, you were thinking of one just a second ago), you swear these people never bring those reasons up. It’s just self-centered nonsense that boils down to preserving their beloved tragic stories. Seriously, there are infinite timelines out there already. It’s ridiculous that people believe there shouldn't be at least one with a perfect happy ending. Who cares? No one even brings up the part about how it can cause a domino effect that makes all future new timelines spawn those same differences even without the presence of an outside influence, which is when there's ACTUALLY a problem...“But yeah, long story short I was scared that if I went to another world and said hi to the wrong person, it would lead to a chain reaction and the whole universe would blow up. And that’s why I stopped leaving this place until you guys showed up.” You shrug it off and end your story with some jazz hands for a bit of levity. Peach continues to offer you nothing but warmth, and it makes you appreciate the companionship the two of you have cultivated. You’re sure a conversation like this could have gone a lot worse depending on who you were talking to.“My, I learned so much today! But I’m glad you’re not worried about that anymore!” Her smile is so dazzling that you can’t help but look away. A pang of discomfort rolls around your gut.“Haha… yeah… good thing that… I don’t think about that. At all. Anymore. Yeah.”Let’s not think about the insane repercussions that killing the Ender Dragon must have had on the Minecraft world’s fate. Let’s not think about that at all.