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Shiro shambles through the halls of the Blade of Marmora's base, supporting himself along the walls on unsteady legs.
For the first time in months he is walking on his only two legs instead of on all four. It feels wrong, like it is something forbidden, but also at the same time it feels like this is what he is supposed to be doing. But his head is hurting and the only thing he can think of is to get to his room. And two legs makes that faster.
A Blade walks down the corridor towards him and seemingly startles.
“Shiro?” it asks, its tone worried.
“Head… hurts…” Shiro mumbles. The Blade looks at him, and while the mask conveys no emotion of worry, his movements does. The Blade reaches out to touch him, but retracts its hand.
“I will get Ulaz,” the Blade says and starts running down the hallway.
Shiro doesn't pay him any mind and continues towards his room.
When he finds it he shambles in and closes the door with a low energy slap on the door lock.
He sits on the bed and takes a deep breath and looks down on his body.
Why is he naked?
Puzzled by this he musters enough strength to walk to his closet and look inside. There aren’t many pieces of clothing, but he finds what could pass as a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. He dresses and sits back on the bed.
Moments later Ulaz steps through the door with furrowed brows.
“Shiro?”
“Yeah?”
“How are you feeling?
“A little dizzy. Why?”
This make Ulaz frown. Was he worried?
Ulaz make his way to Shiro's bed and squats down so they are at eye level.
“Shiro look at me,” Ulaz says with a voice that is a bit too commanding for Shiro's tastes, but Shiro does as he asks.
“Where are you?”
“Blade of Marmora base of operations.”
Ulaz frown. Something is wrong with the answer it seems.
“Who are you?” Shiro finds these questions a bit weird but he answers anyway.
“Takashi Shirogane, nickname Shiro.”
Ulaz frowns deeper, but doesn't say what is wrong.
“What are you?”
“Pilot of the Kerberos mission.”
“Are you sure?”
“Of course I am sure, that is how I met you.”
“Are you sure about that?”
“What do you mean?”
Ulaz stands up and walks over to the door and places a finger on the door lock, locking the door, and without a word walk back.
He squats in front of Shiro and stares into his eyes.
“Where are you right now?”
“A room?”
“Who’s room is that?”
“My room.”
“Yes, this is your room. And your room is Home. And Home is Safe.”
“Uh, okay?” Shiro raise an eyebrow on Ulaz’ weird way of speaking. It is apparently the wrong thing to do as Ulaz sighs.
“Why do you have a collar, Shiro?”
Shiro lets his mechanical hand reach up to touch the collar around his neck. Since when did he have a collar?
“Because I’m a good pet.” The words left his mouth before he can even think them.
“Yes, that you are,” Ulaz says with a soft smile. “But do good pets wear clothes?”
“N-no?” Again the reply surprises Shiro.
“Correct, then why don't you take these off.” Ulaz gestures to his clothes.
“I...I can’t wear clothes?”
Ulaz frowns again.
“Good pets don't wear clothes. Good pets don't
need
clothes.”
“But…”
“Shiro, are you a bad pet?” Ulaz asks, his cold eyes almost painful to look at.
“N-no… No.”
“Then take off the clothes.”
Shiro hesitates. One part of his brain tells him to do as Ulaz says, the other tells him it's wrong.
“Shiro, take of the clothes,” Ulaz repeats.
Shiro swallows. This was becoming uncomfortable. He rises from the bed and walks to the door. He needs air.
Shiro slaps his hand on the door lock, but it only gives a beep of denied access.
Shiro can feel the panic wash over him.
“Ulaz…”
“Go back to the bed, Shiro.”
“What is going on?”
“Do as I say, Shiro.” Shiro feels a cold chill creep down his back. Ulaz voice is so cold and commanding, so different than his usual demeanor
“Ulaz, you are frightening me.” Shiro takes a step back and hits the door as Ulaz walks closer.
Then suddenly Ulaz grabs Shiro's arms and twists them over on his back. Shiro gives out a yelp of surprise and now the panic is a factum.
He trashes around to get free, but Ulaz grip is too strong.
Ulaz steers him over to the bed and bends him over the edge. With one hand pinning Shiro to the bed and keeping him restrained at the same time, he reaches down and opens one of the drawers beneath the mattress, pulling out all sorts of restraints; cuffs and belts, chains and what he easily recognises as spreader bars.
“Ulaz, stop!” he cries out when Ulaz starts to attach padded cuffs to each of his limbs with nimble fingers and quickly enough Shiro finds himself barely allowed to move, his hands cuffed to a bar above his head, back towards the wall of the bed, another bar keeps his thighs spread wide, his knees almost pushed to his chest by chains connecting the two bars.
Shiro fights his restraints, struggling and trashing in a hope to get free.
“Ulaz, let me go!”
“No, Shiro, this is for your own good,” Ulaz says and rummages through a box on a nearby shelf.
“I had hoped I would never have to use this again, but I see no other option,” he says as he picks up a small medicine bottle. With a syringe he extracts some of the contents and turns to Shiro.
“What is in that syringe?” Shiro asks, fear in his eyes. But Ulaz doesn't answer and places the syringe needle at Shiro's neck.
“No, STOP!” Shiro trashes again, but Ulaz holds his neck still as he injects the liquid into Shiro's bloodstream.
Then he lets him go.
Ulaz fetches a chair and seats himself in front of Shiro, observing him.
For some time Shiro feels nothing different. He is expecting to feel dizzy or sleepy, but it never comes.
Instead he feels hot.
And it doesn't stop. He feels the heat rising, his clothes quickly feels too tight and constricting.
When the heat starts pooling in his crotch he starts to panic again, tugging on the cuffs.
It hurts. His pants are too tight!
Ulaz seem to notice his discomfort and cups the growing erection through the fabric with his hand, kneading it gently. It alleviates some of the pain but not nearly enough.
It also makes Shiro moan unwillingly.
Ulaz fishes out a knife from his coat pocket and for a moment Shiro thinks he is going to stab him. But the doctor simply starts to carefully cut away the clothes Shiro is wearing. First the shirt, then the pants, and Shiro groans as his erection is freed from its confines, the colder air a blessing against his too hot skin.
Then Ulaz bends down and rummages through the drawers again and for some time all Shiro can see of him is his furry head crest and some hunched shoulders.
Shiro yelps as something wet and cold touches his bared hole. Ulaz' clawed fingers are probing the sensitive skin around the puckered hole, lathering it up with lube.
“W-what are doing?”
“Preparing you,” Ulaz replies calm and lets a clawed finger slip past the taught ring of muscle into the clenching heat.
“Preparing me for what?!” Shiro feels the panic rising again as Ulaz pushes the digit deeper, twisting and pulling on the edges, stretching.
“For your reconditioning,” Ulaz says flat as he adds another digit and starts to scissor and pump his fingers in and out.
“Ulaz, please stop! I don't want this!” Shiro tugs on his bonds in another futile attempt at getting loose.
“I am sorry, Shiro. But this is better for you than to remember what happened before. It is for your own good.”
“Remember what? I don't understand!” Shiro was unable to say anything else as Ulaz other hand reached for his member and gently stroked the flesh. Shiro whimper at the feeling of Ulaz slightly colder hands brushing over his way too hot skin.
Ulaz let’s go of him and picks up something from outside of Shiro view.
He hears a bottle being uncapped and seconds later something cold is pressed against his hole. Whatever it is it is rather wide and cold.
Ulaz presses the object deep and the cold surface makes Shiro shiver before his insides can heat it up. The object goes so deep Shiro feels like it is nesting in his gut. It feels weird.
And then Ulaz flips a switch and Shiro gasps.
“Make it stop!” Shiro whines as the toy, it has to be a sex toy, sends powerful vibrations through him. Shiro squirms in his bonds, the feeling borderline uncomfortable.
Ulaz answers by pressing a finger against the toy, pushing it deeper into Shiro’s body.
“Stop!” Shiro cries out desperately.
“No,” Ulaz answers without even looking at him, seemingly more interested in observing the toy pressed into his hole.
“Ulaz… please… I don’t understand why you are doing this to me.” Shiro is outright begging him. “Why can’t you at least explain why?!”
“Because it is not needed. All you need to do is answer my questions. So who am I, Shiro?” Ulaz asks once again.
“Ulaz. You are Ulaz.” Shiro blabbers, he doesn’t know what Ulaz wants him to say. Ulaz has always been Ulaz to him.
“Wrong. Who am I?”
“I don't understand, you are Ulaz!”
His erection is so painfully hard. If only he could stroke it or cool it down.
Ulaz pushes the toy deeper and Shiro cries out.
“Please, Ulaz, stop. I can't take anymore!”
“Please I beg you.”
“Make it stop.” Tears are streaking down Shiro's face as he begs. But it only makes Ulaz turn up the intensity on the toy inside him.
“Good pets do not beg,” Ulaz says cold and keeps his even colder gaze trained at Shiro’s face.
“I don't understand…” Shiro sobs the words out and shakes his head in dismay. Things are starting to feel distant, like Ulaz and Shiro are sitting miles apart. He can barely hear the galran’s words.
The drug tries to drag him further down. Everything is a haze now, memories and thoughts floating by. He sees things he is sure is not true or has never happened, but there are so many.
He still tries to fight it, drag himself out of the bog he is stuck in. Even if it feels warm and just
right.
More memories: Him on the floor, the Blades around him, they do things to him. He begs them for more. Conflicting emotions flow through him; this is good/this is bad.
He remember being touched. Good feelings. Warm touches, embraces, love.
Pleased faces, happy faces, faces which gives him warm smiles when they see him.
He feels trust, safety,
belonging.
Why would he want anything else?
Ulaz asks him something. He can barely focus on him now, everything floats.
He knows the right words, they are right there on his tongue, begging to be used. He just have to open his mouth and speak them.
“Who am I, Shiro?” Ulaz asks again and this time Shiro hears him, loud and clear. He opens his mouth, desperate to say the words that wants to escape.
“You are Master.”
Ulaz smiles, a big warm friendly smile.
“Good pet. Yes, I am Master.” Ulaz touches him, strokes his hair. It feels so good.
“Will you be good today?” Ulaz asks and gently rubs his neck.
“Yes, Master,” Shiro says obedient. Of course he will be good. He is good. He is the best pet!
“You must do something for me then,” Ulaz says and let’s his hand glide down Shiro’s sweat drenched chest to his crotch. “Will you come for Master?”
Shiro blinks for a second, trying to remember what Ulaz means. It takes him a second to realise and of course he will come for Master! Shiro is the best pet, he always do what he is being told!
Shiro nods enthusiastically and Ulaz gives him a bright smile in return.
“Good pet,” Ulaz ruffles his hair.
Ulaz cranks up the setting on the toy inside Shiro and Shiro moans.
“Will you be a good pet and play with yourself if I let you go?” Ulaz asks and Shiro nods. He will be very good.
Ulaz removes the bonds and Shiro does his best to complete his task.
One hand on the toy inside him thrusting in and out with vigor, the other around his dripping cock, stroking it firmly.
“Good pet,” Ulaz praises and Shiro feels so good.
He has to make Ulaz happy, he has to prove he is the best pet!
Ulaz eyes follows his every little movement, observing him, testing him. And Shiro provides, stroking and thrusting, his moans filling the room along with sounds of wet flesh.
He is almost there when Ulaz’ hand closes over Shiro’s cock and Shiro can’t stop himself from coming, soiling his Master’s fingers.
For a second Shiro is afraid he has done something wrong, but Ulaz smiles and holds up his cum dripping hand towards Shiro’s mouth. Without thinking he brings out his tongue to lick it up.
“Good pet, Shiro. You are a very good pet,” Ulaz praises and Shiro lets the warmth flow through him as he obediently cleans his Master’s hand.
Shiro is the best pet.
-----
Shiro's head rests in Ulaz’ lap as the doctor slowly pats his hair.
“That was close,” Kolivan says, arms across his chest as he observes the sleeping pet thoroughly.
“Yes, it was,” Ulaz replies.
“Can you ensure it will not happen again?”
“There will always be a risk,” Ulaz says his eyes locked on the sleeping face of his pet.
“And if he rebounds again? What will we do then?”
“He can never achieve happiness with the memories of the past clouding his mind.”
“So this is an act of mercy?”
“Yes, as a pet he will be happy.”
Kolivan sighs.
“Do with him as you wish, but keep in mind that there is someone beneath that calm obedient pet. Do not treat him as a toy.”
“I would never-”
“I know you would not. But the base is big and we have many Blades that might not understand. If he rebounds again it will be difficult to keep him here.” Kolivan sighs again. “For all of us.”
“...I understand.” Ulaz says quietly. “If I can’t make him go into this headspace again I will send him away, home, to where he came from. Away from the war.”
Kolivan nods. “That will be for the best.”
Kolivan leaves and Ulaz is left alone with Shiro.
He prays he will never have to do what he just promised to.
Shiro licks his lips in his sleep and continues his dreams of treats and praise.