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Tony grew up with two important rules that he carried with him into his adult life. Howard made sure that those two lessons would carry on. That two lessons beat into his son's head would be his only legacy.The first rule was that Stark men don’t cry. And Tony made sure that no matter what painful words left Howards alcohol loosened mouth he would never cry. When a beer bottle narrowly missed hitting him in the head, he didn’t cry. When his dad would make him hold hot metal he endured it with gritted teeth and an absolute hatred for the idea of crying.The second rule was easy to understand. Tony had to keep his chest covered at all times. The reason for this being three fold. The first reason to keep the marks on his chest covered was so that no one would know that he had two soulmates. Having more than one was rare, and while most people celebrated the idea there were still a sizable number of people who felt that it was unnatural or greedy. The second reason was that while people would have been divided by the mono and polymate debate there was one thing that most people would disagree with.Both of his soulmates are men. Now, that might not have been a problem if he was say, Captain America or James Barnes. Everyone simply ignored the fact that they were each other’s soulmates. Just like they ignored the fact that they had had a third unnamed soulmate neither of them had found before they died.The third, and most important reason for keeping his marks a secret is because both his soulmates are long dead. Steve Rogers and James Barnes died fighting Nazis and saving the world. Not only would the press have a field day writing tear-jerking editorials about the doomed to be alone Stark heir.Because of this Tony developed a full on regime to make sure that no one would ever be able to see his marks. First, he would use some of his mom’s make up and cover the words with that. Then he would cover that with a bandage. The words were right over his heart so the last step was to cover the bandage and makeup with a high collared shirt to make sure that no one would even get a glimpse of the bandage or the make up.Howard was particularly fierce about his enforcement of the regime. More than once Aunt Peggy would have to get between Tony and a knife wielding Howard, who would rant drunkenly about how if Tony couldn’t keep his marks covered Howard would remove the problem himself. After the third time it happened, this one resulting in a cut to Tony’s cheek, Aunt Peggy and his mom removed all the knives in the house and set up detectors so that no one could bring any into the house.They missed one. Every night Tony would lay awake with a small knife close by. Sometimes it would be under his pillow. Other times it would be in his hand hovering over his chest, right above the marks that made his mom sad, Howard angry, and Tony feel just a little bit more alone in the world. Other times the knife would still be in his hands but instead of hovering above his chest it would be hovering over his wrist.The tabloids would have a field day. Stark heir kills self over impossible love. It would probably inspire romance writers for decades to come. MIT is much better. Tony meets Rhodey who lets him come with him to a tattoo parlor when he goes to get his own mark covered up permanently. Apparently fate didn’t take into account nurture being stronger than nature in Rhodey’s case. Rhodey’s soulmate cheated on him and Rhodey just said fuck it and left him.Rhodey is the first person he tells about his marks. He even shows them to him. Rhodey just looks him up and down and says that he would pay to see all five feet of Tony try to kiss the two men.He and Rhodey try dating for a while. Rhodey was everything he wanted in a partner. Boyfriend Rhodey is kind, generous, attentive, and funny. Best friend and adoptive brother Rhodey is all those things and more and Tony misses that more. He wants his brother back. When he tells Rhodey, his sweet, wonderful, and kind Rhodey completely understands and they go back to being friends.Women wept for the end of the perfect couple and wept for the return of the perfect friendship.Tony tried dating a couple more times but he learned quickly that no one wanted just him. They wanted his money, power, skills, and status. Rhodey was there for him to help pick up the pieces when he found out that Sunset was stealing his designs for her father and when he found out that Tiberius wanted to make him into a fool so that his reputation, and that of SI would suffer.Rhodey was also there for when Tony drained all of Sunset’s bank accounts dry, including those belonging to her father. Their staff and employees got advanced warning so that they wouldn’t be affected. Rhodey was also there when he called every single one of Tiberius’ references and made it so that whenever someone would call they ended the call wanting to burn everything that Tiberius touched while he was there.Rhodey was there when Tony built DUM-E, You, Butterfingers, and JARVIS. He was there when Tony celebrated each of their birthdays and was one of the only people who understood exactly what Tony had done. They were Tony’s children, Rhodey’s nephews, he wasn’t ready for fatherhood yet.Then the car crash happened and the whole world found out that Howard and Maria did not have matching soul marks. Maria had given a majority of her life to a man who wasn’t even her soulmate…and it had gotten her killed.There was only one explanation that Tony could think of that would explain why she had stayed with a man who treated her the way Howard did.Him.His mom stayed because no way was Howard going to let his heir be taken. Not because he loved Tony or something as stupid sentiment. Tony just knows that Howard wouldn’t want to have to raise another child. And as much as he thought Tony was worthless he would have fought to the last lawyer to take Tony anyway and then there would only be Aunt Peggy to keep him safe and she was often away on missions.Surprisingly, of the many kidnapping attempts he survived, none of them ever tried to get a look under his bandages. Tony would have thought that even if they couldn’t get the ransom money for him the newspapers would pay good money to find out the names of the soulmates of Tony Stark.Then Afghanistan happened and Tony left that cave with his marks completely gone. Not a trace of them anywhere.Howard finally got his wish.Then, because the universe fucking hates him it turns out that Steve Rogers, Captain America, is actually alive and not looking a day more than twenty-something. Then, because the universe REALLY hates him, it turns out that Steve has some memory gaps and he can only remember that Bucky was his soulmate but can’t remember the name of his second soulmate, and the stretch marks from the serum’s effect on his muscles obliterated the name on his lower back.Tony takes that as a sign that he really shouldn’t be with Steve. Fate must have gotten it wrong. Besides Steve deserves someone as pure as he is, and Tony’s soul is bleeding red and black.He hadn’t planned on letting them move in. But he had seem the way that people at SHIELD stared at Bruce and muttered monster under their breath when they thought no one could hear them. He caught Nat breaking up a fight when several agents attacked Clint on his way from medical. All it took was him overhearing one quiet discussion about Thor and dissection for him to make the offer and they were out of there faster than it took Tony to set events into motion to make every single one of those assholes pay. Of course he failed to consider that with six people living under the same roof, nine if you count Coulson constantly checking up on his two soulmates and occasionally Pepper and Rhodey staying over for a couple of days when they could, they were bound to see each other’s soul marks.The first is Clint. Tony is sitting in the kitchen when the archer comes shuffling into the room, in bunny slippers no less, and pulls out a bowl and milk and then reaches up into a cabinet for a box of cereal. The move causes his shirt to ride up to reveal the names Phil Coulson and what Tony assumes is Natasha’s birth name, in Russian script no less, on the small of his back. Given what he knows of Clint, Tony is certain that the man would be the kind to get drunk and get a tramp stamp. Tony stares into his coffee mug and wonders what it would be like to grow up with what, at the time, was the soul marks of two random people. How free Clint must have felt. Not having his soulmate’s legacy drilled into his head from birth.Bruce is the next one. They’re all in the common room watching Judge Judy, Thor likes the show, when they realize that Bruce has somehow managed to fall asleep with Clint throwing popcorn at the TV and his shirt slides down to reveal the name Betty Ross across his collar bone. It’s cute.Thor’s reveal started when Clint had asked if Asgardians had soulmates too. Thor must have taken the question to mean take off your shirt and show us the name written on your navel. Because that’s exactly what Thor does.Tony can’t read what the language there says but Thor assures them that it is a name and then someone asks about Loki’s soulmate and Thor grows sad and tells them that Loki had rejected his soulmate after said soulmate tried to sleep with Thor. Tony can’t help but feel a little bad but not too much. The guy did throw him out of a window and “kill” Coulson even though it didn’t stick. But the idea of your soulmate not wanting you, or wanting someone else, is a feeling Tony knows well.How can he compete with the perfect memory of the perfect soulmate? The answer is simple, he can’t.He sees Natasha’s when she is putting on a pair of open ankle shoes. Each name encircles one ankle each. He’s not sure where Coulson’s are but Tony suspects they’re somewhere fun. Steve’s are on each side of his rib. The name James Barnes somehow avoided being messed up by the stretch marks that cover Steve’s body. Tony’s name isn’t so lucky and too much of the letters are missing to make them out.Tony vows to never visit Steve in the gym again. The chances of running into him shirtless is too high and the sight of his mangled name is no much for him to handle. It just makes him sad.It’s a couple of days after they find out that Coulson’s marks are on each ass cheek. Thank you drunk truth or dare. When Clint finally does what Tony had been dreading for a long time.Tony is sitting on the couch waiting for everyone to settle down for movie night when Clint asks, “Hey Tony, since everyone has seen everyone’s soul marks are you going to show us yours?”“Sorry Birdbrain, no can do,” Tony says trying to think of an effective joke to go with the situation that would make everyone forget the conversation.“How come?” Clint asks.Lie, “I never got any,” Tony says looking away.“Liar everyone has a soulmate,” Natasha says.Deflect with anger, “Fine! If you must know I lost my marks awhile ago,” Tony says but it doesn’t come out as angry instead Tony knows that his voice is soft and mournful and his hand comes up to rub over the arch reactor and Clint covers his mouth with a hand.“Dude, I’m sorry I didn’t know,” he says softly eyes wide and hand going to rub absentmindedly at his back.“It’s fine. I wasn’t very attached to my marks,” Tony says.“Why? I remember having people read my marks to me every night. I would fall asleep dreaming up stories about who they were and what they were like,” Clint says.“You come close?” Tony asks trying to switch the topic.“Well I always imagined Nat as some scary Russian lady,” he says and Nat pinches his arm.“Tony, why is it that you aren’t attached to your soul marks?” Natasha asks and Tony stands.“It doesn’t matter…We can’t be together,” Tony says and looks away.“I didn’t know that the word can’t is in your vocabulary,” Clint says.“Even I can’t bring back the dead,” Tony says and decides that he’s had enough team bonding and he gets up to leave and turns to find Steve standing in the doorway.“Tony, I just want you to know that I’m here if you ever want to ta…” Steve starts to say.“I’m gonna stop you right there Cap. There’s nothing to talk about they were dead long before I was born…” Tony says and winces when he hears Clint breathe out the they. “Tony…I understand how you are feeling…” Steve says and suddenly Tony is angry and he can feel it bubbling up.“No Steve, you don’t. You didn’t grow up knowing that there was no one out there for you. That no matter what you did there would never be the hesitant excitement that today might be the day you meet your soulmate. You never had to worry about falling for someone completely but knowing that all it’ll take is someone with the right name and that’ll come crashing down. Do you think that I’m a playboy because it’s fun? It’s fucking exhausting…I find a girl and take her home only to find out that she only wanted meaningless sex and who wants her only relationship to be with her soulmate or worse…they want to drain your money until they meet their soulmate. Were you ever near death and think about how your tombstone will never say loving soulmate? Because I have. Have you ever had someone shout that your marks are an abomination and try to cut them off of you?” Tony shrieks at him and when he’s done his hands are shaking and he doesn’t even feel like he’s in his body anymore.He glances up at Steve and sees Steve sifting through everything he just said.“You’re right… I don’t know about being a reluctant playboy, or about gold diggers, or about knowing that any long term relationship you enter into may end in an instant. I also don’t know about my marks being called abominations. But incase you don’t remember I have a soulmate that I’ll never be able to identify because I don’t have my mark, Bucky is de…gone and I can’t remember our third,” Steve says.“It’s not the same Cap and you know it. From day one I knew there was no one for me. While kids in art class were making stupid things to give their soulmates I was working on plans for a time machine so that I could go back in time and meet them. I would leave stupid little dime store gifts on their graves,” Tony says and he’s glad he remembered to change shrines to graves. Much harder to identify a grave than a shrine. He can feel tears forming in his eyes and quickly blinks his tears away.“Tony…” Steve says reaching for him.“I just need some alone time,” Tony says leaving the room and going down to his lab and he’s infinitely glad that AIs don’t have soulmates. He would wish this pain on his worst enemy.It takes two weeks in the lab and BOTH Rhodey and Pepper talking to him before Tony is willing to leave his lab and another two before everyone begins treating each other normally again.Slowly things return to their relative calm or what’s calm for them. Tony can still sometimes feel sad glances on his back when people think that he’s not looking.“Tony…you mentioned that someone tried to cut your marks off when you were younger. Who were you referring to?” Clint asks softly.“There are only six people who know about my marks. Howard, my mom, Aunt Peggy, Jarvis, Ana, and Rhodey. So, take a guess,” Tony says.“Shit.”“Got it in one,” Tony says and no one ever asks about his marks again.Tony is one million percent sure that the universe just likes fucking with him because two months after the Avengers move in it is discovered that James Barnes is alive. Working as a brainwashed HYDRA assassin.It takes all of Tony’s considerable talents to track him down, but eventually he does and it takes a month before he is ready to see them. But when he is Steve is ecstatic. He makes them all clean the tower top to bottom. Tony enjoys the cleaning because it takes his mind off the fact that when James gets here Steve will likely find out that the three of them are soulmates and that Tony knew the whole time and never told anyone.James gets here and he and Steve immediately share a kiss that makes Tony’s heart ache so much that he almost worries that it is something else.Like Steve, James, call me Bucky you helped me remember myself, doesn’t remember the name of their third soulmate. Also it turns out that Tony’s mark was on the arm that has now been replaced my metal.Yeah, the universe definitely hates him. What did he do to deserve this? Did he fuck someone over royally in a past life…or is this his punishments for the weapons he made. His weapons took people’s soulmates away from them so he’ll live knowing that he’ll never be able to be with his?He begins hiding away in his workshop a lot more after Bucky moves in. Everywhere he goes Bucky and Cap are there kissing, cuddling, or being all sweet. Tony can’t stand it, it’s too much for him to take. Every time he sees them together he wants to go up to them and yell, hey I’m your third soulmate, hold me too!But that doesn’t happen. He stays quiet watches the two lovers learn about the world they are now in. He watches them go to pride together and kiss at all the cliché places and bemoan the Dodgers moving. Each day they grow closer and closer together and Tony drifts deeper and deeper into his lab. They’re happy as a duo. They know how each other thinks and acts. More than once he saw them finishes each other’s sentences. He is an unknown factor. They have a balance, Tony doesn’t want to throw that off. More than once Tony has passed out drunk thinking about how good the two of them are together. How they fit like perfect pieces in a puzzle that doesn’t include Tony. He knows exactly what would happen if her were to tell them. There would be doubt about whether he’s telling the truth, then there would be a couple awkward dates that they’ll all hate, the press will print something unflattering about him, and eventually they’ll figure out that fate got this one wrong and they’ll break up and Tony will literally be living with his exes. He’s just saving them all some time. The announcement that Steve and Bucky are getting married is what finally pushes him over that edge. The night after the proposal Tony sits in his lab and drinks more alcohol than he prays his liver can handle and locks down the workshop and looks at the knife sitting on the workbench and he carves Steve and Bucky’s names just below his reactor, the alcohol numbing the pain.“J…I love you,” he slurs before pressing the blade to his wrists and then waits. Slowly his vision goes gray and he thinks that that is fitting considering that’s what his world without his soulmates was like.He feels himself floating on a hard cloud and frowns, and he can hear a humming noise. Almost like voices.“He’s coding!”“Get the paddles!”“And put them where?”“Call the surgeon!”“Come on!”“Tony, come on you can fight this!”“We love you!”Some of the voices are familiar, and some he is sure he’s never heard before. But that last one sounded just like Steve. But why would Steve be saying love to him? He must have been roped into speaking for all of the Avengers…speaking of the Avengers, how could he have been so selfish? He’s a majority of their air support and visual recon. What if they needed him? What if people die because he was too pathetic to live without his soulmates?Useless...just like Howard used to say.When he opens his eyes he finds himself in a hospital bed, bandages over his chest and wrists as well as an IV in his arm and he grips the IV angrily and pulls it out along with all the wires attached to him and he tosses them onto the floor and undoes the bandages and sees that the marks are illegible thanks to his scars and his drunkenness. He climbs out of his hospital bed and heads down to his lab. He has to make up for his pathetic self indulgence. He makes new armor for Steve and Bucky, new arrows for Clint, better charges for the widow bites for Nat, stretchier pants for Bruce, a new arm for Bucky, a new phone for Thor, and even armor for Coulson.He knows that it will never be enough. There’s no way that he can make up for the trouble he’s caused the team. He’s just managed to get the last of the plans put together when he hears people outside his lab, voices he recognizes. It’s the team and they sound so angry.Well, of course they sound angry. Tony probably caused them so much trouble with his stupid actions. “Tony! Open up please!” he hears Steve shout and Tony ignores the banging on the door and speeds up his work.“No can do Steve. Gotta get these projects built. Lots to do,” Tony says and hears sounds like Steve is ramming his shoulder against the door.“Tony doll, what are you making?” Bucky calls out.“A bunch of stuff for you guys,” Tony says.“Why?”“To say sorry for being selfish,” Tony says and wow they must have given him the good stuff. He’s not even trying to lie or deflect.“How were you selfish doll?” Bucky asks.“I tried to die...you guys need air support...sure Rhodey is better at it than me but he enjoys working in the military. If he had to leave it would be my fault,” Tony says.“Tony why did you try to kill yourself?” Steve asks.NO! Tony’s mind shouts at him but his mouth is already going, “because I’m tired of seeing you and Bucky being all lovey dovey with each other knowing that you guys will never know I’m your third soulmate, and that even if you did you wouldn’t want me,” Tony says and slaps a hand over his mouth just as Steve manages to break down the door.“You’re our what?” Steve asks.“Nothing...It’s not important. You guys are happy as a duo and I’ve lived forty odd years alone. I’ll be fine to live out the remainder alone. Besides, it’s not like I can prove that I’m your soulmate. So why would you believe me, I’m probably doing it for attention,” Tony says and moves something across the screen.“Tony...I…” Steve says and Tony refuses to look up and see the hatred in his eyes.“Just stop Steve. I’ll go live in one of my other houses. You and Bucky have a nice wedding and live out your lives the way you were meant to. I’ll still make you a bunch of cool stuff and still pay for things. And I’ll be there for missions,” Tony says hands shaking and he has to grip the table.“How long did you know the three of us were soulmates?” Bucky asks and Tony flinches.“Since I got my marks,” Tony says.“Back when the world though we were dead…” Bucky says and Tony squeezes his eyes shut and sinks his teeth into his bottom lip. He is not going to cry, he refuses to cry. He’ll let them go and they’ll be happy and he’ll just stay quiet and alone.“Tony doll, can you look at me?” Bucky asks and Tony shakes his head. If he looks at Bucky he’s not sure that he’ll be able to remain composed.“Tony, I’m not mad. Can you look at me please?” Bucky tries again and Tony turns and looks up at Bucky. Bucky quickly glances over at Steve who nods and suddenly Bucky is kissing him softly and gently. Tony feels someone press against his back and figures that it has to be Steve.Tony feels himself melt a little under their warm embrace and they easily hold him close and work together, like the perfect team. Tony jerks himself away and tries to catch his breath and his mind races around and around as he tries to sort through the logical side of his brain. “I’m sorry,” Tony says.“For what? I kissed you,” Bucky says.“For telling you. I ruined your perfect team. I’ll leave...I’ll talk to Rhodey...I’ll make weapons again to make up for him having to join you guys and leave the military...I’ll…” Tony says shaking a little and Bucky pulls him into his arms.“Tony, teams can have more than two people, and Fate seems to think that the three of us will make a great one,” Bucky says and Tony notices that they’re the only three in the lab. The others must have left.“Fate gets it wrong! Look at Loki! Look at Rhodey!” Tony says.“Look at Clint, Nat, and Coulson. Look at Betty and Bruce. Just because Fate is capable of getting things wrong doesn’t mean it can’t get things right,” Steve says.“I don’t want to know if fate is right,” Tony says.“Tony, that right there means that fate got it right. Do you think Rhodey was upset when he found out that fate got it wrong? He was probably relieved, and I don’t know much about Loki, but do you think he was upset that fate got it wrong? But I want you to think about Bruce, would he be upset about fate being wrong about Betty? And what about Clint? You know he’d probably eat all the chocolate in the tower if he found out that Coulson or Nat weren’t his matches. You know deep down that fate got this one right,” Bucky says.“I know nothing of the kind. I...You guys have been friends for decades. How can I possibly compete with that?” Tony says.“You don’t. If you ever feel like you have to compete with me, then we’re doing something wrong. Love is not a competition, we love each other equally.“No...you don’t understand...I’m not good,” Tony says.“Why? Because you made weapons for the army? I’m not sure when that was turned into a bad thing. Weapons manufacturing has been in every war since the first ever one. From sticks, to stones, to swords, to bombs. You are not responsible for things beyond yourself. You’re not Omnipresent or omnipotent, you are Tony a man from New York. I’m Bucky from Brooklyn. The blonde who looks like he’s never heard a ten dollar word before in his life is Steve from Brooklyn,” Bucky says.“But…”“Does Nat have to compete with Clint or Coulson?” Bucky asks.“No?”“Then why do you?” Bucky asks and he can see Tony’s resolve breaking down.“I’m not asking you to change overnight, and I’m not saying that things’ll be perfect with the snap of a finger, but I’m willing to put the work in. What about you Stevie?” “Of course,” Steve says and runs his fingers through Tony’s hair an amazed smile on his face.“What about you Tony?” “Yes,” Tony says.“You know, Stevie and I would lay awake some nights and wonder what Anthony Stark would be like. I could never remember the name but I remember imagining you with Stevie. What you would look like, sound like, what your smile would look like, what your favorite food would be, if you were a Dodger’s fan...You surpass everything we ever imagined,” Bucky says and Tony sniffles and gives him a watery smile.“Your charm should be illegal damn it. I’m trying to save us all some heartache and here you are wooing me,” Tony says.“Honey, not wooing you would be the real damn heart ache,” Bucky says and Tony opens his mouth to make another comment about himself but he’s cut off with a kiss. And everytime after that that he tries to self deprecate he gets cut off with a kiss.It’s actually kind of nice.Their relationship is messy, like all are. Someone will fail to communicate and it causes more pain than it should have but they work through it and talk it out and Tony falls asleep to gentle kisses and singing of old songs and sometimes he’ll join in or sing them to sleep and it’s amazing.He’s the best man at Rhodey’s wedding to an Air Force Major, and fellow superhero. Carol is a badass that takes no shit but always has the softest smiles reserved for Rhodey and Tony is happy that his brother is happy. Rhodey is best man at his wedding in turn, it takes years but they had been in no rush to marriage yet, but when Tony says “I do,” everyone is there. Thor manages to convince Loki to not cause any trouble on the special day and Loki takes it a step further by recruiting his boyfriend Doom into threatening all the villains with pain of death if they interfere in any way with either ceremony. Tony thinks there might have been sex involved but he’s not worried about his villain’s sex lives. When three of them share a kiss Tony nearly has a heart attack but in the good way and his soulmates make him watch cheesy rom coms and eat junk food with him all night. Not wanting Tony to have to have sex until they’re all sure that Tony is ready for sex and Tony loves them for it.Tony falls asleep in their laps and he’s never been happier.
