Work Text
Kate didn't really have a mom.
It slipped out.Kate didn't tell people about her family. She kept things professional. She deliberately separate work and her home life. No one in her office knew anything about where she lived or where she had grown up. They didn't know that she liked classic black and white musicals. They didn't know that she took apart her sandwiches to make sure the ratio was right every single time or actually enjoyed bad diner coffee because they had those sweetener packets that she'd over indulged in as a kid. The closest she had come was telling Sandra about that fatal bus trip and she hadn't seen Sandra since.
Kate had never had a pet growing up. She had learned to drive on an old pickup truck in her grandfather's back field at the age of fourteen. She had realized she wasn't straight when she was in ninth grade.
Her dad had made her hot apple cider when she told him.
He'd gotten home late and she'd been pacing the kitchen. He hadn't even asked what was wrong, just put on the kettle to boil water and listened. She'd been so scared. Not of his reaction, never that. Of the reaction of everyone else.
She'd seen what had happened to her own family. Her mom drinking more and more cheap wine, until she tossed her glass in her dad's face. Her mom packing a bag and driving away without even looking at where Kate was hiding behind her bedroom door.
Kate had been six.
She hadn't understood until later that her mom had walked out not because of her but because the man she married didn't love her, could never love her like she wanted.
Kate had seen her dad struggle with the looks he got, the shame of being outed before he'd been ready for it. How his job got harder and harder until he was forced out. How standing up for himself became about strict truths and cold hard facts. About how his smile became his shield.
She'd seen his occasional boyfriends who never stayed for one reason or another.She'd endured through holidays
where her mom was stony faced and distant, or overly cheerful, and never mentioned her dad as anything other than, "that man." Her dad endlessly apologetic, without actually saying a word.
So yes, she'd been terrified.
Her dad had put the mug of apple cider in her hands and
said he loved her. He said
she didn't have to tell anyone until she was ready. He said that she was strong. He said that he was proud of her.
Kate was already in the habit of not talking about her home life but that night had sealed it. She didn't mention her mom. She didn't mention any of it, and yet it had slipped out. Why had she said that?She liked Anya. She pushed, Kate always liked people who challenged
her. It was exciting. Sitting in that van was too hot and claustrophobic
and static sparked over everything, but it also made her pulse race like nothing had in a long time.When Anya called, she thought... maybe.
When she fired the gun she thought... yes.When Anya kissed her she thought... this.She was absolutely
terrified, and it was glorious.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
"Actually do you think Anya could help us pull together a sting on the fly?""Who's Anya?""She's in the field tonight."She slipped.It had only been a few weeks and she had slipped up again. It wasn't a big slip but it was enough. The devil was in the details after all.For a half a second, Kate's heart stopped beating and she waited to see if anyone would notice. Then Seth's eyes widened."Oh."Kate took a breath. There was no stopping it now. Leonard clearly hadn't picked up on it but for all his average skill in court, Seth was highly adept at social cues."What?" Leonard asked, eyes on Seth."I'm not surprised you didn't tell me, but I figured you'd know." Seth glanced at Leonard before looking back at Kate.
Her heart was in her throat, her mind racing over the possibilities. Trying to remember if either of them had even mentioned any opinions on same sex relationships.
This was how it started. It didn't matter if there was a nondiscrimination clause in all of their contracts or if it had no affect on her work. She was already a woman. She'd worked twice as hard as either of them to get where she was. She had deliberately worked hard to cultivate a reputation for being ruthless and precise. An office romance would have killed all her hard work, but publicly making out with Leonard would have still been better than what was coming.Seth stretched out Anya's name into two syllables, finger tauntingly close to her face. He laughed. It was like a knife to the chest. For his part Leonard was cold as ice. Face a professional mask.Kate looked down at the folder in front of her. The words blurred under her eyes, but she couldn't let the tears fall. Seth was still talking, except--"And that is it.""What?" she snapped. At least anger was better than the alternative.
"Tim Cline."It was enough. It got them back on track. It wouldn't be enough to make them forget, but it gave her a stay of execution. It was enough to distract Seth. That combined with the victory, well, Kate was fairly sure he wouldn't hold it against her. Leonard was a different story."Hey"Kate did not flinch but only because she had been expecting it. Seth would shrug it off. He seemed more concerned with the fact that she hadn't told him then the fact that her partner wa a woman. Leonard would take it more personally."Maybe I should have said something.""You didn't owe me that."And then--"I'm happy for you."
Kate busied herself with her coat and her bag, so she wouldn't have to meet his eye as he asked--"You like this girl?""Ah, yeah. I kind of do..." It was a soft answer, nothing like the firm no-nonsense persona Kate wore at the office.
"Good. I told you, you're a catch." He turned heading for the door a soft smile on his lips.Kate fixed her eyes on a point on the wall, and breathed, carefully not blinking so teats wouldn't smear her makeup. The knot in her chest eased. They didn't hate her. They hadn't sneered at her or pushed her away or suddenly looked at her with disgust.She had never had this, not since she'd moved out of her dad's house. It was something she'd never thought to wish for.Slowly, Kate turned and looked at the three men waiting by the lobby.
A part of her had been planning on brushing off drinks but now... She swung her jacket over her shoulder and followed her friends out into the New York evening.