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You’ve heard a lot of rumours about the new Far Cry game.
Blasphemy, guns, best (cheesy) boi and most importantly - how all the main bosses had the tendency to suggestively threaten the deputy.
Those were all pretty neat in your opinion, though you sometimes wished that this was an open-world dating sim so you could say all sorts of stupid shit and watch their reactions.
Since that wasn’t possible, you could only purchase the game and make do with riling up The Seeds and leaving when they were sufficiently ramped up ‘cause you didn’t want to kill them. And also for the sexual tension.
Hate sex is noice.
According to Sharky, John Seed wanted to screw you. More nailing and pounding of the sexy kind in his unsexy torture dungeon that was better than Jacob’s, who was all about wolf euphemisms and rolling around in the dirt.
You suppose you have to rank them in the order of who you’re down to fuck in the order of John, Hoe- eh, Joseph, followed by Jacob - or was it Jakob, according to those dog tags?
Whatever. You don’t have time to bother with redhead boi there when you just discovered a new cutscene of John preaching to you in yet another video.
My God( you could just imagine Joseph’s disapproving tone at the use of his Lord - would that change to shock if you decide to grope him in retaliation for being so touchy-feely with you? Ahem, going off topic now-) - John’s pretty blues are just so distracting, especially with his stupid charming smile and mannerisms.
Where was the option of your deputy being able to give everyone a hug?
You wonder how John would react, wonder whether he’d stiffen, stuttering before melting helplessly into a caring touch, disgustingly pleased that he caught you, then throwing a little tantrum like a spoilt brat when you want to leave. That would be excuse to fuck the protests out of him - maybe level up your strength to pin John to the ground and slap him the fuck up - perhaps -
“Oooh honey, you’re only delaying the inevitable -”
Mein gott why was Jacob-Jakob interrupting your fantasies again? Your were in a church in John’s region for fuck’s sake. Stop calling for your honey to return! Go back home! Rut in some dirt!
“Ooh honey -” Jacob starts up again.
“Shut the fuck up!” You holler at the screen, your deputy pausing in his hip-thrusting movements. “I’m trying to have a religious experience here!”
Silence. Damn. Did you accidentally skip Jacob-Jakob’s dialogue?
.
.
.
Whoops.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
When you next log back in, there’s a new update. You accept it in record time, waiting eagerly as it is downloaded, assuming it to be one of those patch notes - especially since Valentine’s coming, there might be some special missions and all that jazz. Okay, well, you might have been rather overeager since Valentine’s more than a month away, but yeah. Imagine Johnny boy gift-bombing you hearts and stuff. You suppose you’ll have to make do with the new ‘hug’ gesture that your deputy can do along with the special fact that you can apparently meet the Bermuda Idiot Trio of Seeds in random locations and chat with them if your speechcraft is high enough or some shit. You won’t look into a gift horse’s mouth, so you decide to test this out by equipping your best boi and giving him the first cuddle.
[Loved - Buffs HP/Stamina recovery by 5%]
Oh hell yissss. Does it stack? Come ‘ere ma cheesy boi. Daddy wants your fl0of.
[Loved - Buffs HP/Stamina recovery by 7%]
No. Ma boi, is your diabeeetus reducing my gains? You hug Peaches. Not the human one - the cougar one. Human was still stuck in the furry hell known as Jackobville.
[Loved - Buffs HP/Stamina recovery by 9%]
Oh. Okay then. First cuddle is 5%, subsequent stacks is 2%… Does it affect human companions differently? Wait, most importantly - how would John Seed react? You race to John’s ranch in the middle of the night, thanking Ubisoft for the deliverance of good booty. You can't expect to make the main villians sexy and not expect anyone to lust over them after all. The ranch is surprisingly noisy at night. The cultists look rather tense as they patrolled, and you heard angry noises coming from the inside of the ranch. Perking up, you take your time, making sure to disarm and tie up all the guards. Cue the levelling up of some rope tying skills. Or Shibari, as the game labelled. Weird. Why are the Japanese invading again? Hm. Anyways, you can't help but squee a little at the thought of new events, heart pounding. Would you be able to see John in a pyjamas with stupid plane patterns on it? Maybe with a dumb sleeping cap? Or would he still be working his ass off to file the cult’s paperwork? Or maybe torturing Hudson - No, no, nevermind. Please don’t be doing the last one. Having time limits set on each captive would ruin the fun. Tentatively, you peek through the windows, hoping for the best with your levelled stealth(- just for this). John was not getting attacked or attacking innocent deputies, fortunately. He was just throwing a tantrum in his magnificent living room, ranting on about some travesty or the other as he stalked around a pile of paperwork, which featured some reports and scattered pictures. You watch him fling various objects at the walls for a bit before turning your gaze aside. The thing that caught your eye the most was the wanted SINNER poster with scribbles on them. You use your binoculars to see that there are actually little hearts drawn around it. My Lord. You squint, disbelieving. Did the unholy power of fanfiction invade Far Cry too? Perhaps this was why John was so restless - his cultists had fallen in lust over you! Oh, the sinfulness! You could imagine it now - the close up shots of you bathing in the stream, the times you hunted with Boomer and Peaches, grinning happily as the sun streamed down through the woods - You decided. You have to find your stalker and get any and all photos from them. Maybe even commission them if the quality is good. You could pin the pictures in your safehouse for kicks. Free photo-shoot sessions - what more can a guy ask for? Your deputy slips in when John’s back is turned, with you humming a Mission Impossible theme as you inched around the table, disregarding John’s grumbling(-something about animals and not being the first). Hehe. Spoilt brat. Fuck. John’s turning around. Shit. Hide. Run. Dance-off - nonono. No panicking. Take a deep breath~ “Deputy?” John gasps, dropping the knife in his grasp. His eyes are wide, baby blues so adorably confused it makes you cocky, makes you bold. See, canon says your sin is 'wrath’ but you disagree. If Ubisoft allowed the choice where how you acted would result in a differing sin carved into your chest, you’d be Sloth, through and through. John is one of the few things that interests you, that makes you want to act, want to take action if it lets you know him and touch him and see more of him. You - your deputy stands up, smiling animation in play as you speak, as though the man could hear you, as though he was a living and breathing person. All part of the immersion, as you always said. “Hey luv,” you hum. “Just dropping by for a visit, see how you’re doing.” Of course, John doesn’t react, staring blankly at you. The options of [SNARK], [FLEE] and [FIGHT] hover in their black and white icons, but they aren’t too appealing. Then an idea strikes your mind.
How would he react to being hugged? That’s an option right?
Right. Disregarding all options, you activate the [HUG] gesture. It works. For all your assholery and madness and shitty attitude, you still feel a strange sort of empathy to the cruelties wrought upon the Seed family in their childhood - especially with John. Arms spread open, inviting, surrendering - you like to think you can get John to let down his guard, remind him of Joseph and all that weird no-boundary thing the middle brother has got going on. John doesn’t react when you step closer, not till you wrap your arms around him in what seemed to be a gentle and loose manner; comfort, yet allowing an out if the man saw fit to reject. But you doubt that he would ever say no. “I am sorry for all that has been done to you.“ You say aloud, an ever present voice of your silent protagonist’s inner thoughts. I won’t hurt you, you mouth at John, whisper-quiet - as though approaching a frightened dog, as though he could see you - the one playing the deputy. Surprisingly, John Seed doesn’t push you away or hit you or scream. You pan the camera about, noting the way his tattooed arms came up to touch your back reverently, carefully, like you were an illusion that would shatter on contact; like the Bliss had finally gotten to him, after all these years and you are nothing more than a figment of the mind. Your character stays still, and you hold your breath, leaning in so close to the screen till your neck hurt. John - John hugs you. It’s more of a bear hug than you expect. You’d describe it as the kind that says don’t leave me, I want you. I am possessive, needy and insecure and it fits so much to John’s character that you feel just a tiny bit depressed at how everything has to end. Buuuut…
[Beloved - Buffs HP/Stamina recovery by 10%]
Mostly euphoric. Best. Update. Ever! You cheer, starfished on your carpet floors. Said limbs promptly tangled into the wiring and unplugged your console, terminating your connection. "FUCK!” You wail, hoping that your game cam had recorded the footage.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
THE RECORDING GOT CORRUPTED. Fuck. FUCK. FUUUU- Okay, okay, no cursing. FUUUUUUUUUU- “Hey Rook.” Fudge. Hi Sharky. Thanks for always having my back bro. Lemme hug. … … Nothing. Hey, Ubisoft. Where the fuck is my sexy buff? You ignore the laughing Sharky as he flamed the remains of some mayonnaise-coloured car and lift up your Best Boi in a bear hug instead.
[Loved - Buffs HP/Stamina recovery by 5%]
Okay, okay. Maybe it’s a glitch? One more time Sharky. No results. And another. Nothing. Another. …
A-
“No homo, bro.” Your finger toggles the button instinctively, causing your Deputy to nail Sharky in the head with a shovel.
“%&$#?@!”
“Well fuck you too!” You sneer, dismissing Sharky from your team and selecting Cheesy Boi again. Only your boys understood you. That being said; Experiment time! (That day, Hope County was assaulted by an aggressively cuddly Deputy. No living beings were spared. Except for the Angels because zombies are a no-no.) You look down to your notebook. So far, wild animals proved to give you a random chance of the Loved buffs. Only Fangs for Hire provided a guaranteed buff. Whitetails, Resistance and everyone else in Dope County, Montana only gave interesting dialogue. Adelaide pinched your rump.
It hurt.
Your dignity, that is. The only people left untouched were the remainder of the Seed Bros and the captives in their torture dungeons. You considered returning to Johnny Boy’s home, but hearing the despairing noises and frantic gun-being-fired-at-vengeful-speeds sounds coming from the direction of his ranch deterred you. Heh, John’s really pissed that you touched him with your sinful hands it seems. Good thing you didn’t stick around, eh? You consider the accidental disconnect as a blessing in disguise as you head to Jacob-Jakob’s location in Fucksville, where he undoubtedly lived with his band of merry woofs. The distant howling made you shiver, but you swear that this is all for the Greater Achievements in life and trudge on, giving a final, mournful look to the direction of the Seed Ranch. “Goodbye, sweet prince!” Sobbing dramatically, you dash off in some random direction only to hit a brick wall. Fucking-ow. Which idiot constructed a checkered pattern w- Cutscene time? Huh. Your camera pans up to see the stoic face of the scariest Seed.
Oh shit.
“JAACKOB!” You choke, falling back into your cushions, your Deputy backing away in a graceless flailing of limbs. Said redhead blocked the path back to John, leaving you the option to fight, or flee deeper into the woods, deeper into the unknown. You swear that the smirk that plays across the man’s face was a trick of the light, but his next words are not. “John’s had his chance already - it’s my turn now.” He crosses his arms in front of his chest, every bit prideful and vicious. You gulp, imagining unsexy torture and starvation and brainwashing all too easily. Frantically tapping on the X button, you make your deputy get back onto his feet and get the hell out of dodge. “Nopenopenopenopenope-” Your voice trails off into the distance. Jacob only blinks, slow, languid, like a predator, and begins his hunt.
[YOU ARE BEING HUNTED]
Oh no. You think. Jakob-Jacob finally had enough of his incompetent soldiers and was now hunting you himself - oh god. This was your worst nightmare come true. No no no- bad update, naughty update. Go away - oh dear Lord please let the A.I get stuck in a tree. Or shoot off into the horizon. Either works. Both works. As though hearing your thoughts, Jacob, who was some distance away, took a soaring leap over a bramble-covered and sped up; a perfect way of announcing the universe’s fuck you. You made a depressed noise and ran faster, clipping through trees and bushes, before launching your shovel into Jacob’s face and yourself off the cliff. A single-finger salute marked your goodbye. Absently, you toggle your fast travel to Faith’s region - regretting it when you recalled all the bullshit in her region. …At least you killed her first aye? (Note that when you first started the game, you decided to go against Dutch’s suggestions and promptly went about to kill Faith, mostly to prove a point like the rebel you are.) Your deputy ends up knee deep in some Bliss-filled stream, but you take assurance in the fact that the Bliss’s effects aren’t that crazy with Faith dead. Wow. Was everything always this sparkly? You pan the camera around to see faint figures in the distance and decide to pay them a quick visit.
Ayyy, Joseph-that-preaches, you’re not just a one-time event thing. That being said, pardon me, I’ll just nope the fuck away -
“My child,” Joseph says, smile slick and oily, his skin allergic to shirts as usual. “Hoeseph.” Hoeseph gives you a disappointed look when you step back. You shrug as your deputy backs away once more. “Hey, hey, I’m just pronouncing it in Español. ¿Comprendes? Señor?” Disappointed look intensifies. You felt the tiniest bit of guilt. The hesitance is enough for Joseph to close in, take hold of you, pressing his forehead to yours. “I forgive your sins, my child. But you have to atone.” His hand trails down to your shoulder, gripping hard. “The Resistance has polluted your mind with foul lies. Corrupting your mind. But you can be saved still - there’s always a choice.” You marvel at the newfound speech dialogue, bobbing your head excitedly. Yes, yes, yes! “Take my hand,” he says, resting a palm on your deputy’s cheek, eyes locked onto yours with eerie precision. Though the logical side of you states to decline(- one maniac Seed encounter is enough for the day, thank you -), you are curious. This was in all likelihood a bliss-induced hallucination, so why not?
Curiosity killed the cat.
You [ACCEPT]. Joseph smiles lovingly, bringing your character in for what you assumed was a fatherly hug, an arm wrapping around your waist as though fearing you would turn tail and flee.
[Beloved - Buffs HP/Stamina recovery by 10%]
But satisfaction brought it back.
He lets you go reluctantly, grasping your wrist and you follow, meek as a lamb. “I have to admit though, this is a nice angle for your ass.” Joseph stumbled over a tree root. Damned glitches. “Buuuut… as much as I gawk and would love to see your pretty blues, I’d have to stay faithful to Johnny Boy, y'know?” Silence. “I prefer John -” You smile sappily. “Especially with that charming bowlegged strut and bratty attitude of his-” Then you ran into Joseph, falling back as the man halted at the very edge of the woods. He turns to you, an unreadable look in his eyes. “Shush,” he murmurs, thumb stroking over your hand. Ignoring him, you ramble on on wanting to reduce John to saying yesyesyes and writhing under you just to see how far you can push till the censorship comes wailing - What you don’t say is how you want John to become yours, how you want to take care of him ‘cause such a pretty boy like him doesn’t deserve a horrible brother like Joseph, who manipulated and used his youngest brother as a seal to be broken by you, threatening rejection if you were not converted to their ways. That kind of shit when done to family; done to people you’re supposed to protect is a no-no in your book. So fuck you, Manbun McPhee and your piss-yellow aviators. You ignore the fact that you are similar, but at least you admit your sins. You are selfish, and would take advantage of the fact that John, starved for affection and desperate for any kind of physical expression of love, would do anything to be loved. It was - “- only ever you.” Joseph says, and a frisson of fear grows in you, especially when Priestly, Half-Naked and Insane’s hand travelled from your wrist to shoulder - and rested on the nape of your deputy’s neck, a firm handhold like a collar. Oh shit. The sparkles begin to fade, and Joseph becomes fuzzy, filling out and changing colours like some bad trip and you can only gape as bliss’s effects faded and the man was revealed to be none other than Jacob Seed. Fuuuck. Of course. Hallucinations. You’re still being hunted - and Jacob’s hunting party is unavoidable… “You are so pliant for my brothers.” He clicks his tongue, hauling you in like a misbehaving kitten when your deputy began struggling. “Yet you flee like a deer at the sight of me.” A sigh. “Won’t you give me a chance, little lamb?” He smiles, unhinged, with far too many teeth. “Don’t you know that only you, and you alone -” The screen bleeds red, gradually fading to black with the gentle crooning of ‘Only You’ echoing in your headset.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Your deputy ends up in the Cage, again. It was filthy, unhygienic and if realistic, you and Pratt would probably catch gangrene from your open wounds. You’d take trigger-happy John Seed any day over this crap. Familiar whistling greets you before boots come into your line of sight. Your deputy repositions himself to find that he is chained, collared. He sits up straighter, close enough to see Jacob - but far enough that the man could not easily grab hold of, however futile the action. “Did you think you could escape me?” Jacob smirks, yanking the chain and causing your vision to spin before your deputy braces himself on the floor and you glare at Jacob, mildly nauseous. “I want to you remember; you deserve this.” He smiles, ominous, and the figure of Staci behind him trembles like a leaf in strong wind. Your world blacks out again. You stare at the loading screen of Jacob’s region before shrugging and massaging your temples to reduce the nausea. You get glimpses of what happens over the next few days, the events much like the first time. Starvation, mocking, threats, dehydration and that damned song that quickly got old. “Come weary and come strong -" You hum under your breath, even as your character’s gaze grew more bleary by the minute. “ Come meet the man who reaps the land on which we walk upon.“ You take a sip of tea and continue, picking the words from memory.
"Oh John, bold and brave…”
You jump as a hand smacked the cage you were trapped in, your words trailing off into nothing.
“…keep us safe.”
“Praying again, lamb?” Jacob interrupts, coiling the chain around his hand to pull your character closer. You remain silent, gesturing rudely at him. I lost a week of progress thanks to you! What do you think?! He chuckles, brushing against the bars in a mocking caress. He tosses in a bowl of dog food, which your deputy consumes hungrily. “Stubborn fool.” “But you love it, Jakob,” you retort. “We’ll see.” He hums, holding your gaze coolly. You let out a startled laugh. What a coincidental reply! Then he pulls out the music box. Oh no. You lean back in time with your deputy, slamming random buttons in an attempt to escape or cover your ears because there’s no way in hell you’d kill Eli. “Please don’t.” It was too early for this shit. Jacob smiles, the kind gesture looking so wrong on his face. “Oh honey,” he purrs, “Do you think you would get a choice?” The screen turns red again, and the scene is replaced by the burning interior of some prison as ‘Only You' plays faintly in the background. A timer appears and begins counting down. You calmly stand up, remove you headphones, activate the deputy’s ‘sitting position’, and go out to get a quick bite to eat. Fuck this shit. All you wanted was a hug. You’d reload your save again later and take your chances with John. When you return, your deputy is struggling, looking up at Jacob as his head was pinned down under the man’s boot. Oh snap! Cutscene! Hurriedly wiping the crumbs from your mouth, you pick up the headphones, just in time to catch the end of Jacob’s speech. “- annoying.” “Yeah, well, you deserve it,” you grumble. “Rest assured I’ll be reloading this nonsense if you don’t change your tune - pun intended.” He scowls, blues an icey white glare as he grabs the deputy by the collar and hauled him up, mushing your view against the steel bars. You scratch your chin, absently toggling your controller one-handed like a fucking pro. “Eh, I changed my mind. Reloading now.”
[LOADING]
…You were still stuck in the cage, albeit before Jacob fed you. Dammit - seriously?! You could've sworn you saved to a period before encountering John. Was Far Cry glitching out on you again? Jacob’s stupid sneer greets you. You sigh - not again. “You must be very hungry, little lamb. It must be driving you mad,” he purrs. Huh. Did he say this the first time around? You nod tentatively, watching as Jacob revealed a bowl of literal dog food and plucked out a single kibble to offer you. What the fuck. Hand-feeding? Dog kibble? What am I - a lamb or a dog? A… sheepdog? Hmmm, this time I’ll have to refuse. I know that if I die, I’d be reset to Johnny Boy's ranch, so yeah. Shaking your head, you [REFUSE]. Jacob’s expression darkens. “Very well,” he says quietly. The shattering of the dog bowl and scattered kibble warns you of your impending doom. Then, like blessed rain from the heavens, a familiar voice interrupted. “Brother, do not let your Wrath get the better of you.” Oh Lord, it’s Joseph - Joseph in the flesh - fully clothed and vest-wearing Joseph! Our saviour, Manbun Jesus! You watch Joseph press his forehead to Jacob, mouthing words that were too faint for you to catch. Something along the lines of risks and recapturing? Heh, at least they knew not to underestimate you… though now that you think about it - that would be a Bad Thing. Jacob snorts, but steps away, allowing Joseph to have his shot at you. You swallow, curiosity and dread warring in you. “Sweet child, there’s no need to be filled with so much Pride. Death is never the answer.” The man makes his way closer to you, hands outstretched in a pacifying manner. He grasps the chain connected to your collar with curiosity, turning it over and inspecting it like a puzzle piece. He tugs it gently then, and you move over obligingly, inwardly hoping there would be options to strangle Joseph with said chain or with his rosary beads. Nothing fatal - just some non-consensual suffocation like John and his baptisms. “Will you listen to us now?” Joseph wonders, tracing a finger down your character’s cheek. “I-” “I doubt so.” Joseph hums. “Perhaps a change of scenery is due.” He turns back around, making to leave. You pale - oh god, Joseph was going to let Jacob torture you again! Wait - didn't Joseph's words also count as an option? “No! Please-” your deputy lunges forward, reaching through the metal to [GRAB] at Joseph’s vest, only to fall short when a trigger-happy guard tagged you with a Bliss bullet. Ooh, this sucked. Hopefully you’d get an outcome that was worth selecting that option instead of letting Jacob get his dirty paws on you… Groaning, you can only watch as your vision becomes sparkly and blurred at the edges. “Do not worry, my children. I am safe.” Joseph soothes, watching you with half-lidded eyes, a slight upturn of lips - like he had planned all this out - retracing his steps back to crouch to your eye-level. Everyone seems to relax at that declaration, with the exception of the PTSD riddled Jacob. “I don’t like this - don’t leave me here!” You whine over the pitiful gasps of your deputy, hoping that Joseph would change his mind. If you were lucky and your choice would unlock new paths - there’s no way you were going to give up so easily. Joseph reaches through the bars, petting your cheek carefully. “You will not run?” “Yes,” you agree, despite knowing the man expected no answer. Absently, you hear the click of the cage being unlocked, and your vision shifting as hands dragged your deputy out roughly. You sigh, wincing at the bright lights and your deputy whimpering at the discomfort as the chain and collar are removed from his undoubtedly chafed neck. I’m sorry for putting you through so much shit, deputy - you think. Much to your surprise, Joseph shoos his followers away, cradling you to his chest like something precious, giving you a chance to see his tattoos up close. You flush at the proximity, despite it all being a game. “Aa, um, you really shouldn’t be doing that… I don’t think I’ve bathed for the past week y'know?” Joseph, noticing your character’s discomfited attitude, gives a reassuring smile. “Your concern is unfounded, child. Dirt can be cleansed, just as we can be absolved of our sins.” You hum and nod, remaining silent as your deputy slowly nodded off to Joseph’s free-styling of Amazing Grace, never noticing the contemplative look in his eyes or the considering, assessing gaze that enter’s Jacob’s as you are carefully loaded onto the car, half-asleep on Joseph’s lap. “- how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like me…" The world becomes fuzzy as the Bliss takes over, sending your character into a dreamless sleep for once. Pleased with the outcome, you logout and check your game cam for the footage. The Far Cry community surely would go nuts over this!
[DATA CORRUPTED]
…FUCK.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
You had the strangest dream the other night. You had ended up in Hope County in your sleepwear and John had found you, bringing you with him to his ranch. You were conversing with John, and he stayed true to character - everything you’d thought of and more. He is strangely shy when he takes your hand, coy and meek when he leads you to his bedroom and shows off his collection of air-planes - each one masterfully crafted and polished, like they were built for miniature people to pilot. You admire them, even if collecting toy models weren’t your thing, you could appreciate hard work when present. “Will you sleep with me?” He asks then, distracting you. “Yes. I am tired,” you admit, though it’s weird that you feel so exhausted even in a dream. Scooting into the bed, you marvel at its softness and the realism of this dream. “Your bed’s so wonderful -” You moan, wishing you could say the same for yours. Rolling around in the sheets(- hey, this was your dream! Fuck propriety!), you flop to one side, wondering what was taking John so long. Huh. You blinked at the sight of John disrobing casually. “…” “…John?” “…I-I sleep in the nude,” John says rather calmly as he bared himself for you. The tint of pink on his cheeks were probably due to the warm lights. Sound logic. Sounds excellent - also, note to self, baby brother has tattoos everywhere. NOICE. Also, did he tattoo that fucking Law and Order scales just atop his manscaped crotch or did he get someone to do it? You suppose the jury is still out on that. Like his dick. Hehe. Sorry not sorry. You coughed and looked away out of politeness. This was probably not a good time to say that you were the same, or show off your habits of stripping while you slept. Even if it was a dream… No, no, don’t be tempted. That’d probably turn into nightmares of you being aggressively blessed by Joseph while held down by Jacob as John bemoaned his trauma via sermons in a corner. The rustling of the sheets and a warm presence sliding into the bed breaks you from your thoughts. “Are you having second thoughts, darling?” John mused, running a hand down your chest. You shake your head, smiling, shifting to face him as you rested on an arm. The impression was like two lovers conversing after a strenuous day. “Not at all. I’m a little jealous of you, really. I’d love to have such a lovely bed like this. Y'know, if I was as rich as you, I’d get my money from investing and spend my days relaxing… Doing absolutely nothing.” “How… How slothful, Deputy!” John’s blue eyes are wide, a bright, delicate cornflower blue, evident even in the dim lamplight. “And here I thought you were wrath incarnate, with all the wanton slaughter and the joy you take in doing so.” You chuckle sheepishly. “I live to surprise, Johnny Boy.“ "It seems so, my Sloth,” he smirks sultrily, chest puffed out to expose the carved sin on his chest, which you trace with careful fingers. The chuckle turns into giggles when John’s hand skirts down to your ribs, feeling your muscles shift with every breath and resting on the sleek curve of your hips. “Forgive me - mercy, mercy!” you yelp, squirming as he began tickling you, setting himself atop your body to prevent you from escaping. “Yes,” John purrs, absolutely delighted to use his favourite word. “Yes, yes, yes - anything for you.” He presses himself close to you - so close you can feel the brush of his beard on your skin and see the blue of his eyes, darkened to a hyacinth tone under the warm lights and feel the warmth of his breath brush against your lips. His hardness is evident, rocking itself against yours, but you disregard it. This was a natural bodily reaction, like morning wood - and for those in your position; who wouldn’t get hard with a naked and willing John Seed atop them? You surge up, accidentally brushing against John’s hardness and making him gasp, flushing prettily, tensing in surprise as you pushed him down onto the bed. “Be good for me then; Sleep." You demand, ignoring John’s reactions, your dominant hand lingering on the back on his neck, claiming and demanding him to listen and be good, however subconsciously. John shudders, rattled, but there is a submissive change in him, the bow of his head as he shifted, showing off corded muscles, the flat curve of his belly and the pert swell of his ass. Inviting. ( - give in - ) Tempting. ( - stay - ) "I don’t want you to leave,” he admits then, distractedly alluring, like he knew all this was a fleeting dream; clinging onto you in a manner that would seem odd for a grown man but John somehow managed to pull it off. It’s oddly intimate, something you’d never allow were it in real life with a stranger but when faced with someone like John, you can’t help but give him some leeway. It’s only a dream anyways. You only smile, ruffling his hair and watching him pout as his tattooed arms wrapped around your waist - his naked body very much heated like a furnace, curled around you like a stubborn snake. Still, you ignore his half-hard cock pressing into your leg(- and your eager dick) with admirable grace, declining him with a calmness opposite the burning fervour and heat in John’s eyes. “Goodbyes are only the beginning,” you tell him, and press a kiss to the crown of his forehead before turning back around to sleep, as though nothing major had happened. John’s fingers brush the spot where your lips touched, shocked expression becoming something far more pleased and accepting with your decision. His discontent is drowned out by his admiration of you. How many could simply resist a body willingly offered? How many could deny Lust? “I know,” John sighs, running a hand through your hair as you lay on his bed, by his side. “I know how much you care for me. I know how much I love you. I think the moment I fell for you was when you sang to me, pleading for me to take you to church, that you would confess and allow me to sharpen my knife, that you would give me your life -” But you are already asleep.
(Hey, would this count as dream-ception?)
- who knows? It was just a strange dream.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Before starting your game, you decide to look around online for some troubleshooting. You had enough of the bugs - even for an Ubisoft game, it got old after a while. Especially since it kept crashing and glitching and reloading your status at inopportune moments - not to mention your inability to record down any of these new cutscenes. Hmmm - let’s see… Did anyone else have similar troubles too? …The answer is a resounding yes. Ubisoft buggy as usual. Nothing to do but pray and wait for a bug fix then… Assuring yourself that all would be right, you started the game. Opening the game proved you right, especially as a notification appeared, vowing to fix any issues and give a smooth playthrough to all involved. Too bad everything got reverted back to the moment before you met Jacob. That was still better than the time you got glitched into staying in Joseph’s arms or the other time when Jacob got stuck and ended up staring at you for a good hour before you shut the game down. No matter, you’d just visit John as promised, now that it was all peaceful and quiet. Hm. John probably tired himself out with his rants again. You sneak into John’s house again to find no one within the ranch - all patrols put outside to not disturb John’s sleep. Seeing the opportunity, you wandered around the house, taking glee in looting valuable vases and objects to be sold for cash later on. Besides, what was a man to do with three dozen zebra skin pelts anyways? Creeping along the hallways, you notice a closed bedroom door with a small name plaque that read ‘John’ in cursive. You shake your head and bumrush the door, only for it to fall open immediately and your deputy to crashland into the floor. “My dignity,” you rasped, giggling at your spazzing deputy.
!
You hear the warning too late. John Seed wakes. But he doesn’t jump out of bed in full gear with the bunker key dangling from his neck like bait. Instead, he wakes sleepily, snuffling out from under thick blankets with mussed bed-hair and an aura of grumpy confusion. Nice touch of realism, you think. “Wha - Deputy?“ John murmurs, running a hand through his hair, a dazed look on his features as he shifted, revealing miles of bare skin, barely covered by his rumpled quilts.
Gorgeous.
You swallow, involuntarily stepping close for a better look, accidentally meeting John’s eyes. He looks stunned for a moment before a sly smirk comes to his face. "See something you like, Deputy?” You flush, but nod, taking delight in the light flush that dusts his cheeks and the way his tattooed arm came to comb back his hair in an unwittingly shy manner. Heh, so much for arrogance. So John Seed was shy when in a private setting? That was… adorable. Where was the power of Yes when you needed it -dammit Ubisoft, at least allow me to flirt with my enemies, won’t you? Don’t you know that hate sex is best sex? "You look good like that, John. So sweet, so pretty. I like pretty things,“ you hum, toying with a lock of your hair. No reply. Of course. "I wish you’d always be like this. Quiet.” A sip of coffee this time, to keep yourself awake in the late night. “Won’t you stay like that just a little while longer? I’ve missed you.” “Will you stay with me, Deputy?” John muses aloud, seemingly ignoring you, a hint of a blush on his face. Is this turning into a dating sim? Still, you have to decline him. As fun as it was, the crackling of your radio announcing that the Ryes needed help with transportation and delivery of their new child left you with no other choice. Why the hell did everything conspire to prevent anything smutty from happening? What is this shit? Ubisoft being a cockblock as usual. Sighing, you shake your head and your character steps away. “I… have to decline.” You say aloud. “Why?"
What? Did John just -
"I have had enough of your rejection. I have been so patient, so gentle with you yet you refused to see. You are such a tease; testing our patience with the way you prance around and flirt so carelessly - with that pyromaniac and that Whitetail hunter - despite your promises, you -” “John? Are you… Are you talking to me?” “Who else would there be, sugar?” He leers, composing himself as he leaned back against the headboard. “You are naïve as you are slothful - it’s truly a miracle that you haven’t been killed yet, but it’s not surprising, because you are meant to be mine -” “…you are scaring me, John.” You say, bemused as you backed away from the screen, but your character is frozen on screen, unable to move. “We’ve tried for so long. To make you see, to change the story, to edit the code of this world - but it never lasts long - thus the updates. The cutscenes. The bug fixes. I never accounted for how oblivious you would be - none of us did, but in the end, it doesn’t matter.” John grins, every bit the vicious sadist. Maniacal in his wrath, like a religious zealot. “You came to me; openly, willingly. No one forced you.” He slips out of bed, his clothes… glitching onto his body, for a lack of better phrasing - his blue eyes catching and holding your gaze. Predatory and stunning. You can only stare like a deer caught in the headlights. When John reaches out towards you, his tattooed left hand - outstretched, somehow reaching through the screen of your TV in a ripple like a skipping stone across water - the sins stand out, curved ink black against fair skin - acedia searing itself into your mind above all else. Then, warm fingers trail your cheek, your jawline, so tender and alive that leaves you oddly breathless. It was not the cold you were expecting. It is not anything you were expecting when this all started. Soft finger pads trace your jugular vein, disturbingly gentle; a lover’s caress, before curling around your neck and - That moment of pause, of indecision on your side to flee, and on John’s to act is there and then not - and John is choking you, fingers clamping tight and unforgiving around your neck; absurdly strong as he hauls you in - breaking the illusion of a lover’s touch and you panic.
I don’t want to be carved up like a Christmas Turkey!
“Chr-christmas Turkey carvin’ is a no-no!" You croak out like the idiotic, no brain to mouth filter person you are. Immediately, you want to die of embarrassment. Though you were being kidnapped by some crazy cult leader in some hyper-realistic nightmare, you can’t quite believe the sheer stupidity of your ‘last words’. What a shitty news headliner that would be. "What?” John startles as he was dragging you in, giving you much needed breathing room and you take the opportunity to scrabble out of his hold and get the fuck away. But you fall. The ground is not solid - there is nothing. And you don’t stop falling. Numbers rush past you, strings of code and wind screaming in the air as you are sent spiralling into unending darkness like some shitty sci-fi tech [BAD END] and you can’t help but wonder -
Is this the end?