Work Text
It was on the way back to Whiterun, camped out in the frozen wilderness of the Pale, that Valdalynn made yet another stupid decision.She hoped the gods weren’t counting.She had been sitting on some furs on the ground, stoking the fire with a stick while Miraak walked about, making sure the horses were fed well enough for the journey ahead in the morning. When he was finished, Valdalynn motioned for him to sit beside her by the fire, and with a grunt the First Dragonborn obeyed.At night, Skyrim was even colder, and on occasion the wind threatened to expel the only source of heat the two had created for themselves. Valdalynn wanted to curl up and fall asleep in her tent before the freezing air made it difficult to do so, but she also found herself longing to stay awake, at least for a little while, and talk with the man beside her. They were both a little bruised and tattered after clearing out that bandit camp for the jarl of Dawnstar, but it was the last thing on her mind as she tossed the stick into the flames and glanced at Miraak.“We did good today. Don’t you think?”“Yes,” Miraak replied, sounding uninterested.“Didn’t you enjoy it? The fighting, I mean?”He eyed her with an expression she could only assume was bewilderment, and then repeated, “Yes.”It finally hit her, what she had been meaning to ask, after the second failed attempt. Her skin flushed despite the chill biting at it.“Do you… like doing this with me?”His gaze was near unbearable now, almost as much as the long pause that ensued between them. “What do you mean?”Valdalynn thought of ripping out her tongue and throwing it in the fire. “I mean… are you happy being with me? Would you do this if I didn’t force you to?”Miraak was quiet as he thought about it. He looked back at the flames crackling before them, and the warm light casted a strange glow over his mask. She wanted to take it off and see the expression underneath. “I don’t know,” he finally admitted, sounding frustrated or perhaps annoyed. “It’s not like I have a choice.”She had to consciously force herself to not fiddle with her fingers. Her words were coming out rushed now. “I do it because I’m not sure I can trust you.”He glanced at her sharply.“I mean, I do,” she fixed, stumbling. “But I still haven’t figured out what you want yet. What do you want? To take over Tamriel? To kill all the dragons?” She couldn’t stop now. Her hands were shaking. “I’m afraid that if I let you loose you’ll do something to hurt the people I care about and I’m afraid that—”She paused. She couldn’t bring herself to look at him.Miraak didn’t accept that response. “What?” he prompted, voice quiet and unreadable. “You’re afraid that…?”“That I’ll lose you.” The admission burned, made her feel weak and vulnerable. She closed her eyes to hide from his. “It’s just… You’re the only one who’s like me. The only one who understands how it feels to be Dragonborn. I’ve never… You’re not…” She sighed in frustration at her own inability to express herself. Before she could try again, however, she felt his hand ghost over her arm, warm and alive.“I know,” he said simply, and somehow those two words knocked all of the breath out of her. “You don’t have to have explain.”Valdalynn swallowed thickly. “And I’m sorry if you feel trapped.”“I don’t,” he somehow managed to sigh and chuckle all at once. “I stopped feeling trapped a long time ago, Valdalynn.”She was quiet for a moment. This felt like the most they had ever revealed to one another, much less in one sitting. It was such a foreign feeling to spill the contents of her heart to someone else, and for them to do the same. She almost missed their pointless and incessant bickering, if only because it was something she understood and could hide behind when things became too serious.“And if it isn’t clear,” Miraak continued over her thoughts, “I’m not going to try to take over the world. Well, at least not yet,” he added as an afterthought.Valdalynn’s hands were hovering over his face before she could stop herself. Miraak’s breath hitched, but that was his only reaction as she gently eased the mask off of his face. She placed it on the furs beneath them and looked up at him, shivering when their eyes met. A part of her wanted to look away; she knew how easily he could read her and she didn’t want her thoughts to be known, but she couldn’t help it. Because another part of her did want to be known. To be understood, in a way only another Dragonborn, only Miraak could.“What are you doing?” he asked her, voice softer than before.“I don’t know,” she admitted.He stared back at her for a moment, much more vulnerable without his mask to guard his expression, and then licked his lips slowly. “I—”Without warning, something small and sharp flew past Valdalynn’s face and lodged itself into the tent behind the two. She didn’t even have time to react before another arrow was being fired at her, and it would have met its mark this time had Miraak not pushed her onto the frozen ground, his weight registering on her for barely a second before he was on his feet with flames sparkling in his hand.“Laas, yah, nir!”The Shout echoed into the otherwise silent night, and before it had completely faded, Valdalynn was upright as well with her sword drawn. She tried to follow Miraak directly to their attacker, but before she could, another bandit jumped out from behind a tree and swung at her with an axe.She quickly sidestepped, and, using the momentum she had gained, shot forward and buried her blade to its hilt in the bandit’s chest. He coughed and spluttered blood, and after she ripped it out and turned away, she heard him collapse to the ground with a dying groan. One down.Following the sounds of the battle going on deeper in the woods, Valdalynn rushed in to find one woman lying dead in the snow, and another slashing viciously at Miraak with enchanted daggers. He was evading them effortlessly, but it took his full attention and his back was turned to another bandit, who was currently in the process of nocking an arrow to his bowstring. The bowman, however, never got a chance to shoot.Valdalynn’s fire breath met him full force, and as the man shrieked and stumbled, she drove her sword into his flaming body. After it was done and her opponent fell to the earth, she swirled to see Miraak slip past one more attack before he pulled out a dagger of his own. From then on, it was only a matter of time. The woman kept cursing and hacking, missing every time, and Miraak kept avoiding and slowly tearing away at her skin. Finally, the bandit’s patience snapped and she snarled, charging at him head-on, which was the absolute worst thing to do when one finds oneself against Miraak. Valdalynn knew.He blocked her effortlessly, grabbing onto her shoulder and then jamming his dagger under her chin. And just like that, it was over.Valdalynn looked at Miraak past the bodies between them, and it was he who eventually closed the distance. He had a tight frown on his face, and she wasn’t sure why because she had rather enjoyed the scuffle before she felt his thumb swipe over her cheek and come back red. She hadn’t even realized that the first arrow had scraped her, she had been so absorbed in the melee.“I suppose we didn’t entirely clear that bandit camp, after all,” Valdalynn said breathlessly, and Miraak sighed and nodded.“There must have been some away when we attacked, and then they followed us here to exact revenge.”“Or try to, at least.” She grinned.“Let’s head back. I’ll take first watch.” He turned and began walking back to their camp, not offering the corpses they’d left behind a second glance.She followed. “You think there’s still more after us?”“No. But it doesn’t hurt to be careful. Not like it’ll do any good telling you that.”Valdalynn rolled her eyes. So it was back to insults, then.As she settled under the furs in her tent (she kept the arrow that had been lodged there), she couldn’t help but gaze at the silhouette of her companion sitting by the fire alone now. She thought back to the conversation they had been having before the bandits attacked, and what he was going to say before that arrow had struck her. Unconsciously, her hand rose to where the slice was, where Miraak had gently ran his thumb. She felt her neck warm and scolded herself for being so weak. The last thing she needed was new feelings developing, especially for someone as infuriating as him.Still, even though she tried to direct her thoughts to more practical areas, Miraak’s unspoken words were on her mind as she slowly drifted off to sleep, and the feeling of his soft touch on her skin was the last thing she thought of before she slipped into unconsciousness.
