Work Text
Zeus eats her out until her pussy is pouring like tequila at Mardis Gras onto the flour covered counter of the bakery she's been working in for the last few weeks.
She pulls at his hair and squeezes his head between her thighs with more strength than she normally would with any other guy, but Zeus swears he's a god and bragged for so long about it she figures he can probably take a little pain even if he's batshit crazy.
Her ass itches underneath her and she sends a silent prayer to any god that isn't the one between her legs that the flour the guy insisted on spreading out before he spread her out was the gluten free kind. The last thing she needs is to get hives from a random hookup -- again.
Zeus pulls away from her pussy and she groans with frustration, blinking her eyes open to see him prodding at the puddle of fluids she's gushed out with a critical gleam in his eye.
"What the fuck are you doing?" she asks. "Get back to eating me out."
Zeus hums. "No, I think I have enough."
What.
"What."
Zeus slaps her thigh and stands up from his previous crouched position to pick her up and toss her away from the counter. She stumbles a little and watches incredulously as he opens the fridge and pulls out an egg that he then cracks right on top of her puddle of secretions.
He grabs a bag of flour from the counter and pours a little more on top of the same spot and then begins to fold it all together with his bare hands.
She barely notices that the flour is not, in fact, the gluten free kind.
Instead, she lets out a small, confused, borderline hysterical little laugh. "No, seriously, what are you doing?"
"I'm making a baby," Zeus says.
She stares at him. He does not look like he's joking.
"You're making a baby?"
"Yup," Zeus pops the 'p' in the word. "I'm going to make the dough, knead it, and then I'm going to bake the baby in the oven until they're born. Do you have any honey, by the way? It would be nice to have a sweet kid for once, none of my others are really nice to me anymore and I think I'd like a change of pace with this one."
It's not even the weirdest thing going on in...all of this but
"Uh, how many kids do you have?" she asks anyway.
"With my wife or with other mortal women?"
Oh. Great.
So he's crazy, a deadbeat dad, and married.
This guy is so not worth the hives on her ass.