Work Text
~ * ~
~ * ~Why must Mr. Reese have such touchable hair?Why does he need to be so tall?It’s not fair!His eyes can be soft or hard as steel. He sacrifices himself for lofty ideas. His suits should fit like the uniform he hides behind. Instead, he looks like a fashion model.No one has the right to be that comfortable in
their own skin.He reminds me so much of Nathan that my heart aches.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
There they were; sitting Ducks in a hallway with that monster who was willing and able to mow them down. If I had been a second too late
Finch and Teresa would be dead.
Finch stood there protecting Teresa like an Eagle defending its nest. He must have ran as best he could until his bad leg screeched in pain.
What did he see?
Did he observe me killing that assassin? Did he blink and flinch at the shots as I fired over and over again?
I was too late to do anything else. I had to shoot.
Will the soft gray Dove that is my employer be disgusted by my actions? Am I fired?
I had to shoot. I had to protect them.
My brave little Bird with his Puffling.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
John’s heart was in his throat the second he noticed Finch at the evidence locker.
What in the hell was Harold thinking? John could handle this on his own. There was no need for Finch to put himself in another extreme situation. John didn’t need supervision.
Reese gently pulled Finch up to stand and Harold whispered a warning that the gang had been set up. Harold could have let this all play out and just hope that John found his own way through the betrayal.
Instead, Finch worked his way into this heist at great personal cost to himself. One of these idiots could have shot Harold in the face.
Apparently, Jessica was right; John no longer believed that no one was coming to save him.
Reese had Finch now.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
Once again John had to resort to violence. Once again Harold understood.
Harold never seemed disgusted by what John had to do to Andrew Benton. Finch appeared to agree with Reese.
Harold didn’t like violence and tried his best to avoid it at all costs. However, he was a realistic man and knew that some people could only be stopped by using it. It felt to John that Harold was grateful that the world held people like Reese in it. People who could and would do the dirty work to make that world safer.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~Harold walked away from the the table in a daze. John Reese just thanked Harold Finch. International Assassin, Soldier, and Spy just looked into Harold’s face with pools of seawater in blue-green eyes. John let his very soul shine through and Harold was mesmerized.So starstruck in fact that Harold needed to give something of himself. He let John know his favorite meal from the Lyric diner.Harold actually wanted to tell John everything.Every secret, every intimate moment Harold wanted to share with this man. God help him.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
Mr. Reese seemed smitten by Mz. Morgan. Well of course they are extremely intelligent people with sparkling personalities in the prime of their lives. It doesn’t hurt that they are both healthy and gorgeous.
This is for the best. Mr. Reese needs someone in his life who understands about his work, yet is willing to occasionally share his bed.
This is a good thing, Harold keeps telling himself.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
John was not sure why he was so angry at Harold. Finch didn’t do anything wrong. Finch would save a life no matter what.
Charlie turning out to be Elias doesn’t change the fact that Charlie’s life was in danger. What the Numbers do with the second chance they were given was never on Harold. John should be able to separate the two.
It’s just that Charlie had reminded Reese of Finch so very much. Charlie’s betrayal just made John question Harold.
Which was why John was so angry. Trusting Harold was a secret vice that Elias exposed into the light.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
John Reese always knew that the reward for wet-work was always going to be a nameless grave in the Potter’s Field. He had been deluding himself that someone (Finch) would stay long enough to at least bury him before moving on.
However, watching Kohl with the woman who loved him more than anything; the mother of his child for God’s sake, fake her own death to get away from Kohl was too much.
Well, it was just a stark reminder to Reese that he shouldn’t try to reach out and make a connection. It would only end in heartache for both parties involved.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
The world needs Carter in it according to John Reese.
John’s world needs Harold in it.
What does Harold's world need?
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~As he sits beside John’s bed in a private clinic upstate, Harold realizes that The Machine might require an agent, but Harold himself needs John Reese in his world.
~ * ~When John awakens he sees a sleeping Finch sitting awkwardly on an industrial chair. The first thought isn’t the pain, the tubes, or even the realization that against the odds he is still alive. No, his first thought is that Harold will have a kink in his neck upon waking. Also, that Harold is cute when he snores.This last thought hits John harder than Mark’s bullets. John Reese is falling in love with his boss. A boss that risked everything; the mission, The Machine, and his own life to rescue Reese.John doesn’t have to worry about who will be there to bury him. He suspects that even if Reese left to start a new life, Harold Finch would make sure that when the time comes John is buried with Honors. It’s a sobering thought.~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
John was so worried about Harold in the field coupled with John sidelined in the wheelchair that he never got the chance to enjoy the domestic side of working Ernest Trask’s Number.
Harold helped John with everything. They were practically living together. It was bliss on reflection.
John’s spirits lifted after the case was over primarily because he proved to Harold and himself that he was still useful.
In addition, John figured out that Harold let slip pieces of his background with that cushion. Harold must have known how important it would be to John’s comfort in a wheelchair because Harold had spent time in a chair too.
John delighted in this new information as well as the reassurance that Harold wouldn’t discard him like a disposable razor.
All in all, John was far happier than he deserved to be for a man recovering from a gut shot.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
Harold is frantic listening to John tussle with the would-be assailant. Mr. Reese is not yet healed. What if he ruptures something?
John grunts and Harold asks for an update. John wishes gunshot wound healed quicker. Harold prays that they never happen in the first place.
~ * ~
Andrea Gutierrez hugged Mr. Reese. That hasn’t happened before. Hopefully it happens more often. John deserves some human contact.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
Scott Powell reminded Reese that John let down everyone who has ever cared about him. The idea that Harold would ever return his feelings wasn’t even the first reason John could never
reveal his newly discovered love.
The main obstacle would always be that John’s love was a death sentence. John barely survived six months after losing Jessica. Losing Harold would have John eating his gun in hours.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~Mr. Reese showed Finch the drawing Darren McGrady had done. The taller man laughed at it and tossed it aside on a nearby flat surface as if it were unimportant. He then asked if there was another Number. When Harold said there was not, Mr. Reese left with a wave and his coat flapping behind him in a similar fashion to Darren’s sketch.Once the cameras showed him that Reese was several blocks away, Finch stepped over to the same shelf and picked up the notebook paper.Harold smiled to himself. John had no idea that young Mr. McGrady had truly captured John’s essence. Strong, brave, and a little theatrical; John Reese was a superhero. He even had a cape of sorts with that long billowy coat.Harold moved down an aisle to a book of short stories by Mary Roberts Rinehart. Harold found the page for “The Bat” and carefully folded the uncanny likeness between its pages.~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~Once Harold understood that his fascination with Mr. Reese was becoming personal, Finch would hold himself in check very carefully. No matter how much he wanted to plead to John to be careful, no matter how hard it was to listen to John fight, no matter that Harold’s first concern was for John’s safety: Harold always asked about The Number’s status first and foremost when they reconnected after a comm silent event.Until of course John nearly burned to death in a car fire while working Michael Cahill’s Number. Harold was struck dumb when John seemed genuinely hurt that Harold hadn’t asked if John was fine. It never occurred to Finch that Mr. Reese would want that level of friendly caring from Harold.Having been given permission, Harold delighted in allowing his mother hen side to flourish. John not only allowed Harold to care for him but also to show it. Little things like a new gun cleaning kit, bullet proof armor that was light and fit like a second skin, a holster that went around John’s waist to keep his gun at his lower back secured.Harold now stocked John’s fridge with a grocery delivery to supplement all those canned goods at his new hovel. John’s suits were upgraded from J.C. Penny’s to Hugh Boss. Better shoes for ankle support and slip resistance. Harold also now took it upon himself to schedule one of John’s identities for a complete physical.Harold experienced great joy at being granted permission to let some of his affection bleed out by way of small gestures and gifts. Harold was bad at human interactions but at least John had now given explicit consent for Harold to care about and for him.~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~Their Number was Adam Saunders. He did something with Stocks and Bonds. John might have been able to learn about it easily if Harold wasn’t on his knees adjusting John’s inseam. Harold’s face would rise high enough to be level with John’s cock. It took every ounce of training and will power John had to keep his erection down.John kept complaining about the fitting. His other suits that were tailored by people John wasn’t falling in love with and fantasizing about at every turn were fine. John was sweating profusely. This was sweet torture. Of course later this scenario was going to be great fodder for bedtime. Right now the situation was getting tight to say the least. ~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
Harold seemed so at ease with Leila Smith. He looked so natural with a baby. John’s heart swelled.
Leila was a doll. Walking through the park with her in a carry-all was interesting. John picked up on the looks they were getting. People thought Harold and John were a couple of proud new parents.
Reese knew that would never occur to Harold but it was a nice fantasy; sort of an undercover fake-marriage mission.
~ * ~
Harold saw the way John naturally took to Leila. It was an inborn instinct. Mr. Reese would be a fiercely protective yet stunningly gentle father.
The sacrifices he made for Leila; giving up Gianni Moretti, the horrible bruises on his wrists, and having Carter's disapproval hurt John deeply. However, it was all worth it for Leila’s safety and in keeping with John’s protective streak.
Harold hoped that when John no longer wanted this work, no longer needed this purpose, and could no longer live this life that he would settle down and marry. John would be an outstanding father.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~“Goodnight, Nathan,” Harold turned away. He didn’t want to watch Nathan leave, not again. Sure, Nathan would be in the other room, but once again Nathan chose to be anywhere else except with Harold.Perhaps Nathan would call one of his girlfriends for some fun and only check in on Harold every so often.It didn’t matter how much Harold wanted company, how much he wanted to talk, hold hands, and cuddle like they used to, Nathan wasn’t interested; would never be interested again.~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
John was surprised that Carter got the Dons to agree and asked, “How did she convince them to go with her?”
Over the comm Harold could be heard to sigh and say, “She didn’t. She kidnapped them. It seems you’ve had something of an influence on her, Mr Reese.”
John felt a deep satisfaction knowing Carter took his advice, but also worried that Harold was disappointed in him. John would check later.
~ * ~
Harold was so proud of John he was bursting. John walked into that warehouse like an avenging angel to get Taylor Carter back. Not a scratch on that child. Harold felt so inadequate as the getaway driver.
~ * ~
John got home with mixed feeling. He was glad Taylor was alright, happy that Elias was in custody, but he remembered the stark terror of watching Harold pick up a gun to basically volunteer to be cannon fodder as a distraction.
Essentially, Harold was going to be a target on the gun range just to save Taylor; a boy Harold had never even met. John finally saw the true terrifying depths Harold would go to in order for others to live. John was going to have to watch out for that lack of self preservation in the future.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
John was taken aside by Carter in the hospital. His back would sting for days with a golf ball size bruise after Tommy Clay shot him.
Carter found a blanket for John and answered her phone, "Yeah? He’s right here with me."
John took the phone ready to apologize to Finch but all he heard was Harold’s near prayerful words, "Oh, thank God! I tracked your phone to a hospital, but… "
John heard Harold swallow,"I didn’t know…"
Affection for Finch and pride in himself for inspiring that level of emotion from Harold was warring inside John. He needed to deflect with humor and sarcasm. However, he would remember this moment after their work was completed.
~ * ~
Harold sounded like he was stretching his neck muscles as he said, “I’m not sure he deserves our protection Mr. Reese.”
John answered immediately, “He killed his friend in cold blood and shot me in the back. I wasn’t thinking of protecting him.”
Yet, inside John was cataloging his victories with Finch:
Finch was comfortable enough with John to show his weakness via his neck.
Finch thought John was forgiving enough to still protect Tommy.
Finch was not himself forgiving of Tommy for hurting John.
With all the small gifts he received on this case, John thought it was almost worth getting shot.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~John entered the Library slowly. It was dark, not even the monitors were lit.Once John was in the main room he heard Harold inhale, "I want to make something clear. Although I apologize profusely I need you to believe me when I tell you that I did not lie to you.”John snorted, “Obfuscating is better?”Harold stepped forward so that moonlight hit his tortured face. “I swore to you that I would never lie. That’s more important to me than splitting hairs. I do apologize and I will try not to do it ever again.”John ran a hand over his face. He had a choice to make. Trust Harold or walk.John looked at the person who had become his world. What Harold had tried to do was noble. Finch wanted to give John a birthday gift. It was sweet but misguided.Finally John stepped closer and squeezed Harold’s shoulder. “Just remember that trust has to go both ways. You have to trust that I can handle a bad situation.”With that John went to his new apartment, to the home Harold gave him.~* ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~Henry Peck’s Number brought up a lot of past regrets for Harold. He led John to Grace. He spilled out all his hurt and disappointment in himself. John listened with tenderness.Harold was tired and wanted to sit down. John called a cab and both men got into the taxi. John was worried that Finch didn’t even ask where they were going. Instead, he watched the city go by and carefully sipped his Sencha green tea.~ * ~John paid the cabbie and tapped Harold’s shoulder, “Let me show my place.”Harold looked out the other window to see the Baxter Street building. John had taken his morose boss home.Harold gathered his wits about him and opened his door. Reese stood guard ready to lend an elbow if Harold needed it.They rode the elevator in silence. John opened the apartment door and checked his security before letting Finch inside. John took Harold’s coat and the now empty tea cup, “Make yourself at home. I’m gonna make a quick stir fry. Nothing fancy but we need to eat.”Harold wandered over to the view of the park with only a nod. Soon the room smelled of garlic, ginger and onions. John nudged a glass of burgundy into Harold’s hand.After about thirty minutes John signaled it was time to eat. Harold sat down and pecked at his food for a bit. After one reluctant bite Harold brightened. “Mr. Reese this excellent!”John preened. They resumed their meal with less tension.While clearing the plates John decided to just say it, “You know I appreciate you trusting me with Grace. I promise that I’ll keep an eye on her until you can return to her.”Harold seemed shocked, “Mr. Reese, I can never return to Grace. Didn’t you hear me? I used her, kept her in the dark, then made the decision to allow her to think me dead rather than giving her a chance to make a life altering solution. I took her choice away just as I took yours in regard to Karen Garner.“John leaned forward on the counter, “What was the point then? To warn me away from being your friend?”Harold avoided eye contact and said, “To show you how bad I am, how repellent. You need to keep away from me. My past is hidden because it will hurt you just like it hurt Grace.” Harold stood and limped over to the couch.John followed, “I’m not a civilian, Finch. I don’t need to be shielded from your past. What would it matter if I died tomorrow from your past or mine?
Hell, I only have a future because of you.”Harold shook his head. “Don’t say that. You have done nothing wrong. You were lied to and you thought you were saving people.”John knelt at Harold’s feet. “So were you.”Harold whispered, “You can not know that.”John gathered his strength and cupped Harold face to gently force the man to look at him, “The hell I can’t. I know you, Harold. Furthermore, I want to continue to fight this good fight alongside you.”Harold looked startled and John found it cute. Slowly, John leaned in for a kiss that could end their relationship once and for all.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
John’s lips barely brushed against Harold’s.
Then
he retreated to check for damage. Harold’s eyes were closed, his face enraptured, his lips half opened. John couldn’t believe the beauty before him.
Unfortunately
, Harold opened his eyes and shook his head. “This a bad idea.”
John sat back and removed his hand from Harold’s face. Reese squared his shoulders preparing for the blow. “Because you aren’t attracted to me or because I’m a murderer?”
Harold’s expression hardened and his lips pursed together. “You are not a murderer!
In addition
, you know very well that most human lifeforms on this planet find you attractive. You are perfect and do not deserve the baggage that follows me.”
John chuckled, “Harold, I have a CIA assassination team actively looking for me so that’s kind of a pot/kettle situation. Do you want my baggage? Because I’ve already volunteered to help carry yours.”
Harold’s face softened. “I want this too much to allow myself to ruin it.”
John took Harold’s hands into his larger ones. “If you broke my heart in a week that’s a week of happiness I thought I would never get.”
John leaned forward and brushed his nose against Harold’s while whispering, “Please let us have this before we die for real.”
Harold reciprocated the Eskimo kisses.
Finally
, Harold tipped his forehead against John’s and sighed, “I haven’t been with a man in nearly a decade or anyone since my….accident. I don’t even know if I could be any good for you.”
John smiled and kissed Harold deeply, “You like cuddling? Cause I can get sex anywhere, but cuddling requires time and trust.”
Harold laughed. “Alright, but we have to take things slowly.”
John rose up and took Harold over to the large bed. “A Victorian Courtship sounds delightful.”
John embraced Harold full-bodied, looking down into sparkling eyes. “Stay the night. I’ve got second-hand sweat pants and T-shirts. I’ll take the couch if you are worried about your virtue.
Harold placed his head on John shoulder and whispered, “Alright.”
~ * ~
The morning came too soon. Harold woke up at four as usual. John was nowhere to be found.
However
, before he could panic Harold found a note under his glasses from Reese;
Had to check on an asset. Will meet you at HQ in the morning
.
Harold knew that John meant everything he had said last night but it was difficult not to think that this kind of happiness, this hoped-for love could be kept. Harold had thought about strong loving arms, blue-green eyes, and a gentle voice to fall asleep to for weeks now. Last night had promised just that for however long they have on this reckless mission.
Whatever this was, it was precious to Harold and he had to fight the dread that came over him just as his phone alerted him to a new Number.
John and Harold would have to work out this new relationship after working this case it seemed. It should be over soon and they could secure themselves in each other’s presence.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~All the pain and frustration John had in his gut seethed forward into the phone’s handset as he said, “He’s in danger now, because he was working for you. So you’re gonna help me get him back.”
~ * ~
“I just want to find my friend. See, I don’t have many friends. Just the one, in fact.” John pleaded with this idiot.John wanted to say boyfriend but were they really romantically linked? Could John call Harold more than a friend? John ached to know this and more.~ * ~ All the hoops he’d jumped through were over. John despaired that Harold was already dead. Without Harold what was the fucking point? “I know you’ve got your rules, but I’m guessing they don’t account for everybody being dead. No one answering your phone calls, no one saving anyone. No contingency. Do the math, and figure out a way to bend your rules, ‘cause he’s my friend. He saved my life. Understand? And I won’t do this without him.”~ * ~Caroline Turing, PhD or whoever she really was (maybe this Hanna Frey
person), would regret the day she even entertained the thought of touching Harold. John would need to decode this list of randomness but when he did; Harold would be his again.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
A gunshot rang out and Harold fell. John’s heart leapt to his throat.
Please don’t take him from me, not this close
was all he could think.
John had a choice to make: get Root or check on Harold. It wasn’t really a choice at all.
~ * ~
They needed to get Harold checked by a doctor since that Bitch cut and drugged him, but first Harold required a shower, clean suit, and a safe night’s sleep.
Harold was put in a Reese-approved safe house while John made a stop to pick up Bear, get the dog situated at the library, and find Harold’s shaving kit with a spare suit. When John came back, Harold insisted on checking out his equipment at the Library. John was frustrated with this request but Harold was stubborn about it.
~ * ~
Once they were back at the safe house John realized that Harold needed to be grounded by familiar things after his ordeal. John
kicked himself mentally. They should have bedded down at the Library so Harold could feel safe. John had insisted on a secure location for his own selfish needs. Maybe John even wanted Harold to himself. Well they will just have to work with what they have. Both of them are clawing their way back to normal. There is bound to be a few scratches and falls along the way.
John went through the pantry and found some decent civilian versions of MRE’s. A hearty stew might warm Harold up after his shower.
Speaking of shower, Harold had been in there for
thirty minutes. John went to investigate. Once in the master bedroom John saw Harold’s dirty suit in the trash. It was ripped to shreds, cut to ribbons with a pair of shears on the dresser. Harold had to have gone looking for those in his quest to destroy any last vestiges of that four day old suit. John knew this could either be therapeutic or a warning sign. John listened to the water running and heard no movement. John made stomping noises, then called out, “Harold?”
John received no answer and heard no startled sounds. John knocked on the door. Nothing.
Finally, John closed his eyes and cracked open the door. “Harold? My eyes are closed. Do you need me?”
That was when John heard a sob. Immediately Reese opened his eyes and reached for his gun. He scanned the room and only found Harold clinging to a wall of the shower stall. John tucked his gun in his waistband and carefully went to Harold with a towel. John turned off the spray and wrapped Harold in cotton. Finch let go of the wall to grip John’s waist.
John whispered softly, “I’ve got you. I’ve got you. I’ll never let her get you again.”
Harold looked up at John’s fierce face and seemed to believe him. They walked to the bed. John doted on Harold. Carefully getting him dry without intruding on his modesty.
Harold insisted on getting dressed in night clothes alone. Later, they ate the filling stew. Around an hour after that Harold hesitatingly asked if John would sleep in the bed with him.
John was ecstatic. They bunked down with John on the side facing the door. Harold tried to stay on his side but John wasn’t having it. He grabbed Harold in a deep embrace. “I need to know your safe even in my sleep.”
Harold looked skeptically at John as if he didn’t believe him. However, Harold saw only truth and laid his head on John’s shoulder. They were asleep in twenty minutes.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
Once again John was not there when he woke up, but he did leave a note. Harold was wary returning to the Library in the morning to work the Sophia Campos Number. It was a ridiculously virginal thought, but Harold was afraid John wouldn’t respect him in the morning.
Not Harold as a person but Harold’s need for formality, for professionalism. Finch entered the library and saw John in shirtsleeves turning to him with an alluring smile. Harold was suspicious.
~ * ~
Mr. Reese‘s mood remained jovial. John seemed to be having fun. Harold wanted to be stern and scold him, but it was so unusual to see the playful, silly side to John. It was also flattering that Harold’s return inspired such actions.
~ * ~
Dammit, dammit
thought Finch.
I am a grown man! I can walk in my own town!
The humiliation almost overrode Harold’s panic. Almost
The dog was actually a help both physically and emotionally. Another embarrassment for Finch’s ruffled feathers.
Damn Mr. Reese for knowing Harold would need a new protector!
~ * ~
Harold heard John speak to Ms. Campos. “I’ve spent some time feeling lost.”
The young lady asked, “What changed?”
Harold could almost hear the smile in John’s voices as he said, “Someone found me. Told me I needed a purpose.”
Maybe Harold should let John return the favor.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
John carefully said, “Finch, I can call Fusco.”
Harold inhaled and said, “No, that’s alright.”
He looked at Bear who stood up, ready to help Harold in anyway; just like John.
However, Harold needed to heal and get passed this. It was imperative to be there for Mr. Reese, to be the partner John deserved. This was a purpose for the both of them.
~ * ~
Almost casually, Mr. Reese asked, “Earlier, what did you mean when you said ‘bad code’?”
Harold felt chagrined, especially after Riley Cavanaugh’s sacrifice. “It means a flawed design. The term applies to machines, not people.”
Harold paused to make sure John was listening to this important distinction as he continued, “We have the ability to change, evolve.”
John murmured, “Even killers.”
Harold hoped that Mr. Reese understood what Harold was saying.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
John Reese was about to explode. First, Harold has secret chess games with Elias. Now John was supposed to date this Maxine Angelis. Was Harold trying to dump Reese?
Well, if Harold wanted to date other people then he was going to have to say it to John’s face!
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
John was not usually so paranoid. However, Graham Wyler’s Number was now requiring John and Zoe to be a married couple. What was finch playing at?
The only highlight was bossing Harold around as he repaired and installed cameras. Which was fun but they were going to need to talk. Harold might be having second thoughts about their courtship.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
John and Harold were at an impasse. They needed to have a serious conversation, but the Numbers never stop. The Doctor and her wife were in real trouble. Harold was nervous about the Hospital. John was being torn in every direction.
He wanted to cradle Harold close and help him through the trauma of past physical illness. Then again John needed to save the wife. Purpose versus Love. John remembered this from his time with Jessica. It still hurts.
The difference is that Harold already chose to volunteer to the mission. John doesn’t have to choose. Harold was his partner in all things. Maybe one day Harold and John could be married too.
~ * ~
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ * ~
As they left the hospital, Reese smiled down at the man by his side. Harold not only conquered his fear of hospitals but he helped save a life first hand.
Once they were outside, the limo pulled up. John opened the door for his boss. He checked his perimeter, buttoned his jacket, then opened the passenger side front door to get in. John checked the driver over to see if he was nervous. So far, everything was normal.
Harold rolled the glass partition down.“We will need to walk Bear. I fear Mr. Tao has been feeding him nothing but salt and fats.”
John smiled again. That soon faded. “When we can, I need to talk to you.”
John eyed the driver. “Privately. Nothing drastic just a sort of state-of-the-union update.”
Harold’s eyes grew round. John wasn’t talking about a debriefing. This was going to be about their
personal
union.
~ * ~
They reached John’s loft and by mutual agreement decided to talk over dinner. Harold showered while John cooked. Then John showered while Harold plated.
So within an hour they had steaks, potatoes, and a green leafy salad: simple fare.
Once they were chewing John cleared his throat to begin but Harold interjected, “I understand if after the last few cases you realized you did not want to hitch your wagon to a feeble old man. It’s alright. please do not beat yourself up abou-”
“Wait a minute!” John broke in. “What are you talking about? I thought you were tired of me. Sending me on that date with the reporter, then I’m playing house with Zoe even though it would have been easy for us to pretend to be married.”
John was breathing hard and would have continued, but he saw Harold’s face. “What?”
Harold seemed shocked. He sipped some of wine and looked down at his plate. He inhaled deeply then he took John’s hand in his. “I did not trust my own social skills to both pretend to be an out gay couple and infiltrate our neighbor’s life. I knew Ms. Morgan would be unhampered by the double deception. I was in no way trying to..”
Harold paused to close his eyes and spoke again.
“I
might
have been testing you to see if you would prefer to go back to Ms. Morgan but it was not on a conscious level.”
Harold looked at John, “I see now that I might have been worried that if we developed further that she would be a temptation for my jealous streak. However, Ms. Angelis was genuine. I wanted you to succeed on that case to secure your anonymity as The Man In The Suit. I would not play with that. If I enjoyed watching you go out on a date, a real date where we did not have to be careful of enemies. If I pretended to be the recipient of your attention…”
Harold took a gulp of wine. “ I suppose I just liked pretending to be you on the phone to Ms. Angelis as well. Tall, handsome with a head full of hair. If I went too far I apologize.”
John pulled Harold close into his lap. Harold started to squawk but John could practically lift him up effortlessly. “Listen, if you like to play pretend I’ve got a few scenarios that have been distracting me these last few months.”
Harold blushed which almost made John forgot to ask a question. “Hey, Finch? Why did I need to wear the glasses? The real reason.”
Harold buried his face in John's shoulder like an embarrassed child. This must be a good one if it caused this reaction.
Finally, Harold lifted his head and said, “Ms. Angelis was a reporter looking for Superman. When I knew that Clark Kent was sitting right across the table from her.”
~ * ~