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PART ONE: THE FALLSometimes it seemed like the universe had it out for Penelope. At least, that was what she thought as she watched her ex-girlfriend and current love of her life kiss some other girl. Oh, and now she was giggling. Was the joke really that funny, Josie? I bet I’m funnier. Two short months ago, she was that girl making Josie laugh. Namely, the luckiest girl in the world. She got to kiss and hug Josie and buy her ice cream and hold her hand.
Josie ran up to Penelope and pecked her on the lips, taking her by surprise. “Woah, hey!” Penelope said. “Give a girl a little warning, will ya?”
“Never. Hey, babe!” Josie responded, holding up her graded World History test. “Guess who just got an A?” she singsonged.
“Looks like Josie did, and she’s the smartest girl in the world!” Penelope smiled at her. “I’m so proud of you. We really need to study together sometime. I got a C on that test and I’m barely holding on to my B in the class right now.”
Josie was taken aback. “Well, why didn’t you just say so?” she asked. “Come to my dorm tonight, we’ll look over the material for your retake.” Josie grabbed Penelope’s hand with both of hers and leaned into her shoulder. “And then we can watch a movie and cuddle…”
“That sounds aweso- wait, wait, wait, who said I was doing a retake?”
“Um, I did. Duh. There’s no way I’m letting my baby sneak by with anything less than a high A.” Josie shrugged nonchalantly. “With a kiss for every question right, we’ll have you second in the class.” She pretended to scowl at Penelope. “No matter how much I love you, you can’t have my spot.”
Penelope laughed. “You’re really something else, JoJo.”
“You know that’s why you like me.” She glanced up at the clock. “Oh, hey, it’s time for class again. Loveyouseeyoutonight?”
“Loveyouseeyoutonight,” confirmed Penelope, pulling her in for a quick kiss. She watched her as she walked away with a dreamy smile on her face.
It was crazy how much power Josie had over her. She never would have thought of doing a retake for a test she had passed before she started dating Josie. But now this other girl got to love her, with the added bonus that she was so much prettier than Penelope, with that fiery red hair and those soft eyes and all those curves. Stupid girl. Stupid Josie. Stupid Penelope for breaking up with Josie. She thought it would make Josie stronger and then they would get back together and Josie would thank her for changing her life, but all it had done was ruin Penelope’s life and now Josie had gone and got herself an upgrade.It was all Penelope’s fault, of course. She wasn’t denying that fact. She shouldn’t have tried to be a master manipulator. It never works out like it does in the movies. She’d broken Josie’s heart and she’d never want her back now, which was why Penelope was doing so much wallowing. She was good at wallowing, much better than she was at manipulating. Penelope even knew which chair to sit in in the Student Lounge that gave her a perfect view of where Josie and Pretty Redhead met in between classes without them being able to see her. Wallowing.Had Penelope mentioned she was heartbroken yet? Because she was. Maybe she had no right to be, since she was the one who broke it off, but Josie had gotten over her so damn fast. They had literally been planning their wedding during free time. They had agreed on how many kids they were going to adopt, for God’s sake! (Three, named Genevieve, Sebastian, and Margo. They had each chosen one and collaborated on the third.) It just didn’t make sense. Josie had to still have feelings for her.Or maybe she didn’t, and Penelope was just a dumbass who had been reading way to much into things.“Hey, Peez!” a voice broke into her wallowing. Penelope started and looked up to see Josie standing there, clasping her books to her chest. “You looked spaced out, and I got worried.”“No. No, I’m fine. Sorry, Jo.” Penelope ran her hands through her hair.The worst part? She had agreed to being just friends with Josie. So she wasn’t just creepily watching her from afar, now she had to creepily watch her from up close, too.She had been friendzoned.Stupid Penelope.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Hope was bored with AP Lit, like pretty much any other junior in the history of the world. How could she, when she was so nervous? In just- she idly checked her phone- 15 minutes, she would be asking her girlfriend to their first dance. Prom, of all things. Why did it have to be prom? There were so many expectations that came with it-
“Miss Mikaelson? did you hear what I said?”
Hope wasn’t paying attention. At all. So imagine her surprise when she snapped out of her daze and found the class conversing in pairs and the teacher standing over her.
“Sorry… could you repeat that?” mumbled Hope.
The teacher sighed. “We’re doing a group project. Here’s your partner.” She stepped aside to reveal the pretty girl that sat 3 chairs down from her. They had never talked before, but Hope had seen her in passing. The girl stared her down, looking almost puzzled.
“Oh. Uh.” stuttered Hope, still halfway in her head. The teacher walked away shaking her head. The girl sat down next to her, and Hope gave her a friendly wave, but she didn’t respond, her body language closed off and carefully controlled.
“Hey. I’m Hope,” she started cautiously. When the girl didn’t answer, she prodded, “...and you are?”
“Penelope.” The girl had a low, raspy voice that sounded strangely familiar. Like some sort of distant memory. All of a sudden, she realized what it was.
“Wait a second. Penelope Park?” Hope pointed at her. “Hey, we used to live next to each other! It was in kindergarten, so you probably don’t remember, but-”
“I do.” Penelope looked confused, like she was trying to reconcile something in her head. “Hope Mikaelson. You look… different.”
“Thanks, I think? It’s nice to see you again after all these years. Crazy we’ve been going to the same school this whole time, huh?”
“Yeah,” Penelope said. A flash of anger crossed her face, but it wasn’t directed at Hope. It seemed directed more towards herself.
Hope smiled at her, trying to coax her out, and Penelope hesitantly smiled back, but it disappeared in a flash, like she was trying to keep it under wraps. “Oh my God, you
do
have functioning smile muscles!” joked Hope.
“Oh, shut it.” Penelope shook her head. “Sorry. That was rude. I’m just… not having the best day. Or, you know, the best month. The best year? Let’s just say my life has gone downhill.”Hope felt sorry for her new (well, old) friend. She rested her head on her chin. “What’s up? I’ll be your therapist. School and learning and all that crap can wait until later.”
“It’s really okay. We don’t have to talk about this. Let’s just start on the project.” Penelope went to pick up the paper, but Hope pushed her hand away. No way was she letting her off that easy.
“No, you misunderstand me. I
will
sit here and listen to you bitch for the rest of class.” Hope planted her hands on the table menacingly.
“Oh. Uh.” Penelope recoiled slightly in shock, then sighed and sat back in her chair, putting a hand to her chin in thought. To Hope, she looked a little like a Renaissance painting. “Well. I guess it all started when I broke up with the love of my life. Actually, that’s really the only thing that happened.”
“Oh, I’m so sorry.” Hope sat forward. “What did he-”
Penelope interrupted. “She, actually
.
”
For some reason, that cheered Hope up immensely. “So what happened between you and her?” asked Hope.
“We broke up because she wasn’t standing up for herself. I really loved her. I loved her too much and it hurt me to see people walk all over her.” Penelope shrugged sadly. “I thought I was helping her, but she kept going without me. And now… she’s just moved on so quick, man. I feel… replaceable.” Her big, dark eyes filled with tears.
Damn
, Hope thought.
What a sad story
.
“That sucks, Penelope. I’m so sorry that happened.” Hope placed her hand over Penelope’s in comfort. She seemed startled for a second, and something flashed in her eyes, but it was quickly gone and she settled down again. “I get it, you know? My girlfriend can be crazy sometimes, but it’s my favorite thing about her.”
“Yeah, well.
C’est la vie
,” Penelope said abruptly, wiping a stray tear away. It was strange that Penelope didn’t give any reaction to her liking women. She’d been told she gave off that vibe before multiple times, though. “It’s no big deal, I guess.” Something else was off, Hope could feel it. She just didn’t quite know what.
“Hey.” Hope lifted her hand off of Penelope’s and clapped it on Penelope’s shoulder, and the taller girl looked at her with those doe eyes. “You’re gonna get her back. No one can resist you, am I right? You’re Penelope Park, and you’re smokin’ hot.” (Hope truly meant that. She was.)
Penelope looked like she was going to say something else, but she stopped. Just then, the bell rang. They both stood up, and Hope suddenly pulled Penelope into a bracing hug. She stiffened for a moment, but gave in and wrapped her arms around Hope, burying her face in her shoulder.
“It’s nice to be listened to. Thanks, Hope. You’re not nearly as bad-” Penelope stopped talking and awkwardly started packing up her stuff.
“Not nearly as bad as what?” Hope teased.
Penelope shook her head. “It’s nothing. Never mind.”
Hope decided to let it go for now. She hefted her bag over her shoulder. “We should hang out sometime.” Penelope raised an eyebrow at that, so Hope backpedaled. “You know, to work on the project and stuff.” But Hope couldn’t help it. She was so excited to have her old friend back. “Hey, I’m going to say hi to my girlfriend in between classes, and- check this out-” she pulled out a rolled up poster. “I’m gonna ask her to prom today. You wanna come and meet her? Don’t you dare say no.”
“But- okay, fine. But only because you asked so nicely,” Penelope said sarcastically. Hope slung an arm around her shoulder. “Why-” Penelope gestured at the arm wildly.
“You’re adorable.” Penelope stopped moving, and her cheeks pinkened. Hope shrugged nonchalantly. “And to answer your question, it’s ‘cause we’re friends now.”
“Says who?”
“Says me.” Hope walked gleefully towards the door, knowing she’d won, and Penelope had no choice but to follow her, since her arm was still looped around her neck.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Josie tapped her foot against the ground. Hope would be there soon, and she couldn’t wait to see her. She had a feeling she was going to ask her to prom today. Well, okay, Hope had texted her about it before school started, so it wasn’t really a ‘feeling’ so much as a ‘knowing’, but she was still excited out of her mind! This would be their first dance together.
“Hey, Josie!” she heard from behind her, and she grinned in anticipation, knowing who it was. But when she turned again, she got a surprise- her current girlfriend, with her arm wrapped around none other than her ex-girlfriend’s shoulder.
“Hope. And Penelope!” Josie said, cheerfully. “What a nice surprise!” Oh God. This was a disaster. Or maybe not- it was maybe kind of cool to see her two of her favorite people in the world getting along. Even though Penelope looked like she was about to throw up.
“Penelope, this is my girlfriend, Josie- wait, you two know each other?” asked Hope, pointing between Josie and Penelope.
“You could say that Josie and I are friends,” mumbled Penelope.
“Would you look at that!” Josie bounced up to them. “My best girls, getting along!” she wedged herself in between them and looped an arm around each of their shoulders. She felt a little better about the situation now that she realized that Hope had no idea exactly how
well
Penelope and Josie knew each other.
“Penelope’s my partner for the project in AP Lit, babe,” Hope explained.
“Very cool, very cool! My Peez and my Hope. No, that doesn’t sound right.” Josie thought for a moment before something occurred to her. Oh, she was a genius. “Peez and Carrots!” Hope and Penelope glanced at each other and rolled their eyes. “What? Come on. Well, even if you hate it, I’m using it for the rest of time.”“I’ll have to admit it’s pretty cute.” Penelope elbowed Hope in the ribs. “Right, Carrots?”
“Sure, Peez,” Hope responded grudgingly, but she was grinning.
Josie smiled at Penelope. She smiled back, and it seemed genuine. That was good- something had been up with her ever since they had broken up, and she rarely ever smiled at her for real. It couldn’t be her fault, though- Penelope was the one that had broken up with her. Right? Josie suddenly realized she had been quiet for a weird amount of time and turned to Hope. “So what did you have to show me, babe?” She knew what it was. She had just gotten distracted by the arrival of Penelope.
“Right.” Hope picked up the paper. “This is pretty important. Josette Saltzman-” With a flourish, she got down on one knee and rolled it open, pressing a button on her phone. Take A Chance On Me by ABBA blared out. “Would you do me the honor of reading this sign?” the sign in question read
honey honey, voulez-vous be my dancing queen at junior prom?
Josie squealed, her heart swelling at the sight of her normally stoic, leather-wearing girlfriend being all soft with that inquisitive look and her spot-on Mamma Mia references (the movie they had watched in Josie’s dorm the first time they ever hung out). “You’re literally the gayest person I’ve ever met,” she gushed. “Of course I’ll go to prom with you, dummy!” A few people around them clapped appreciatively as Josie grabbed Hope’s school tie and pulled her into a kiss. Hope pumped her fist discreetly and Josie cracked up, wrapping her arms around her in a joyful hug.
Out of the corner of Josie’s eye, she saw Penelope. She didn’t expect her to be watching, but she had a goofy grin on her face for some reason. Josie broke the hug only reluctantly when she saw the time over Hope’s shoulder. “Well, it’s time to go to class. Were you going to go to that party in Kaleb’s dorm tonight? MG’s making me and it’ll be no fun without you.”
“No, sorry, baby. I can’t afford to have your dad breathing down my neck any more than he already is if we get busted again. I think he’s just scared for you after that whole ex scenario.” Josie chanced a look at Penelope. She didn’t seem to have heard what Hope said. Hope grabbed her bag from the floor and glanced to Penelope, who was still smiling at the two of them. “Hey, Penelope, can I have your number? For the project.” This seemed to startle her out of her daze. The way she was looking at them was strange. It wasn’t jealousy, but something else. “Actually, no need, I’ll just get Josie to give it to me later.” She slapped Penelope conspiratorially on the back. “Bye, babe,” she said to Josie.
Josie grinned at her. “Bye, Carrots.” Hope rolled her eyes and leaned to give her a kiss on the cheek, then turned and jogged towards her next class, which was Calc.
“I’m going to the party, Jo,” Penelope said, more shy than normal.
Josie sighed in relief. “Oh, thank God. See you there?” The party would be much more bearable with Penelope. At least if she lost count of her drinks and got drunk (which did happen on rare occasions) she had someone she trusted to get her back to her dorm safely. And she did trust Penelope. It had taken two months of healing, but they had finally gotten to a point where they could trust each other again.
“Yeah.” She smiled slightly. “See you there.”
Josie walked away with her head full of ideas for prom dresses. Would one of them wear a suit? Then she got distracted by the idea of Hope in a suit, and for some reason, Penelope in a suit, and went right by her classroom. She really,
really
needed a break.
END OF PART ONE
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
PART TWO: THE FUCKUPS
The party was in full swing by the time Penelope muttered the password through the mail slot. Kaleb’s parties were legendary; at the Salvatore School, where most of the students lived in dorms on-site, secrecy was essential. The invites were exclusive and impossible to nab, and the alcohol was top-quality, stolen from a collection of rich fathers’ booze pantries. Penelope, Josie, and Josie’s sister, Lizzie, all received an invitation for these monthly parties, since they were all close with MG, Kaleb’s best friend. Plus, Josie and Lizzie’s father was the headmaster, so they were able to procure drinks without much trouble.
The dorms at Salvatore were pretty large- with two kids to a room, each student got an average-sized bedroom’s worth of space. Kaleb and MG’s was packed wall to wall with about 50 of Salvatore’s elite, dancing and having a good time. The walls in all the dorms were soundproofed for some reason (maybe the school’s founders weren’t
all
boring oldies), so the music was at top volume. Penelope edged to the side of the room and poured herself a vodka soda, with exponentially more soda- she needed to make sure Josie got back to her room safely. She couldn’t help thinking about, as chatter and music assaulted her ears and the alcohol and memories left a bitter taste in her mouth, the last time she and Josie were at one of these parties together.
All Penelope could feel was Josie’s hand in hers and the pulse of the bass through the floor as the two of them stood against the wall of the room. She wasn’t sure that she wanted to be here- parties really weren’t her scene, especially when she couldn’t drink because she was watching her girlfriend- but Josie did and she seemed to be having a good time, drinking and bouncing along to the music.
The upbeat song that was playing before morphed into a slower 80s jam. Josie put her lips close to Penelope’s ear, close enough that she could feel her breath tickling her hair. “Let’s dance!” she suggested.
Penelope rolled her eyes in the most loving way possible as Josie set down her cup and dragged her out into the mass of kids, who had now started pairing off for a slow dance. A space opened up for the two of them, and Josie pulled her close, grinning in that cute way where her nose would scrunch up. Penelope felt the sudden urge to kiss her, so she cupped her face and just did it. It was so wonderful to just be able to kiss her like that, their lips together and sparks
dancing across her skin like magic
and joy and everything warm.
“What was that for?” Josie laughed as they broke apart, their foreheads still touching. The two of them spun slowly in that awkward teenagers-slow-dancing way from teen movies that was so endearing.
“For being so damn cute I could cry.” Penelope kissed her again. “And that was for asking why I would kiss you, as if you don’t already know you deserve every one of my kisses for just being you.”
“You know, for a self-proclaimed total bitch, you’re a cheese ball,” said Josie mischievously.
“Hey. I have a reputation to uphold,” joked Penelope.
Penelope stared out at the dance floor in present times, at the exact spot where she and Josie had swayed and laughed together, and felt her eyes well with tears. Screw this. Screw everything! She just wanted Josie back. She sniffled and wiped a tear away right as she felt a hand clap onto her shoulder. As if her sad thoughts had summoned her, there was Josie, grinning just a little bit too widely, swaying and holding a red Solo cup.
“It’s Peez!” she cried in her ear, leaning into her and giggling. She smelled strongly of wine coolers. Oh, shit, she was already drunk and it was only 9 pm. “Hellooooo!”
“Josie!” Penelope hissed. She took her by the arm and led her over to the drinks table so she wouldn’t get trampled.
“Nooo, I wanna dance,” she whined, drink sloshing over the edge of her cup and dripping onto Penelope’s black boots. She had always been an atrocious lightweight- why hadn’t she kept track of her better? She should have come earlier, she should have-
“Babe, you’re drunk.” Penelope steadied her and Josie listed sideways, spinning on her heel to grab Penelope’s shoulders. Their faces were much too close for Penelope’s sober comfort, their breath mingling in the space between.
“I have a secret!” she whisper-yelled hoarsely, going cross-eyed while trying to stare at… was she staring at her lips? This could
not
possibly end well.
Penelope sighed and poured her a water, snatching her wine from her hands as Josie pouted. “What’s your secret, Jo?”
Josie took a chug of the water and grinned, wiping her face. “Come closer.” Penelope shuffled forward a little. Their bodies were less than a foot apart. “No, closer.” Penelope inched closer. Suddenly, Josie leaned down and pecked Penelope on the lips, and Penelope jumped back.
“Josie, you can’t do that!” She tried to disguise the fact that her head was spinning from the contact with the spat-out words. She had worked so hard to get over Josie, and no matter how much her hands itched to wind their way up Josie’s just-a-little-too-short plaid skirt, no matter how good a little bit of drunk making out would make her feel in the moment, it would end badly for her. Plus, now that she was friends with Hope- “You have a girlfriend.”
“I have to tell you my secret, though.” She leaned forward, and Penelope felt herself drawn closer. “I love Hopey. Really, I do.” Penelope felt her heart sink. “But I still really like you. Maybe even love… I love too much…” Josie cupped her face with shaky hands, gentle despite her level of intoxication. Her puppy-dog eyes were wide, unfocused, pleading. She’d wanted Josie back, but not like this.
“I can’t do it.” Penelope shook her head frantically. “Not again. You’re drunk, and I’m selfish, and if you keep saying things like that, I might say
fuck it
and break all my promises.”
“Then be selfish. Fuck your promises. Fuck everything, and fuck me,” Josie mumbled as she leaned in, and despite her better judgement, Penelope exhaled and let herself fall into Josie’s arms for just a moment, and the needy weight of Josie’s lips on her own felt like coming home after a long trip, but then Hope’s cheerful, trusting face flashed behind her eyelids and despite the butterflies that had so madly started flapping in her stomach, she forced herself away. Penelope shook her head, anger bubbling up like acid and eating away at the butterflies’ wings- anger at herself for being weak, and anger at Josie for not being able to get over herself and putting her in such a bad situation.
“Josie, stop it.” Josie’s brow furrowed. “You’re not going to remember this tomorrow, but I can’t do this to Hope, and I can’t do this to myself.” She grabbed her arm and began to pull her towards the door. “I’m taking you back to your dorm, and you can dry out and make up your damned mind on what you want.”
Josie seemed to be in a daze as Penelope supported her down the hall to her room. The combination of being drunk out of her mind and then getting rejected had caused her to shut down. Penelope let her into the room that Josie and Lizzie shared and the taller girl stumbled immediately to the bathroom and vomited. She was really wasted, to the point where Penelope felt guilty kissing her since she technically didn’t have her consent. When the throwing up ceased, Penelope went in to clean her face with a washrag and help her to the bed.
“Peez?” she slurred, eyes fluttering like she was about to fall asleep.
Penelope tucked the blanket around her, avoiding her eyes. “Yes, Josie?”
“I’m… sorry.” She sounded more sober, more sincere, as the alcohol slowly began to leave her system. “You didn’t deserve that. I’m really sorry.”
“It’s not me that you need to apologize to.” Penelope had only reconnected with Hope recently, but she felt a fierce sense of protection towards her. She’d wanted Josie to be more selfish, but not like this- not at the expense of her relationships.
Josie sighed, but said nothing, and within a minute she was asleep. Penelope leaned forward and kissed her forehead gently before exiting the room, closing the door softly behind her.
Penelope’s mind felt like it was clogged with cotton, and her being slightly tipsy didn’t help at all. Josie had kissed her. She’d kissed Josie back, even though Josie was drunk. Josie had a girlfriend, who was an incredibly sweet, and kind, and funny girl, who also happened to be Penelope’s childhood friend. How the hell did she get herself into this situation?