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“Sammy do it! Faster damn it”27 Minutes. “Dean I’m working as fast as I can” Sam said worried, seemingly scattered. 27 Minutes. Dean could see Cas, his best friend and love, fading away.
-
“Dean do you really think it could work? I mean, could we really get Michael out your head?” Sam asked his brother while reading some lore about ‘How to get an asshole archangel out of your older brothers head without killing him’. It wasn’t the exact title, but that’s how he was reading it as such. Dean only nodded a ‘Yes’ and went back to focusing on reading, or rather just watching the inside of his eyelids because he kept dozing off from boredom, and the light pounding of his head wasn’t exactly helping him stay awake either. He had his legs propped up on the table, and when Sam began to speak he jumped slightly, his legs hitting the floor. “So get this,” Sam said, his popular punchline rolled off his tongue. “This book says we only need a few ingredients and it’ll create some kind of.. pearl?
Sam started to list of things they needed and Dean was starting a mental list of everything.
“We should probably go ahead and head out and get what we need now, plus we need beers, and maybe a pizza too.” Dean says to Sam, grinning a little.
“Alright Alright I hear you, let’s go. Is Cas gonna come with or are you two still arguing?” Sam smiled back at him.
“Sammy, Cas drank my last beer an-“
Sam cut him off by laughing, bending backwards and his hands on his knees, just laughing.
“The son of a bitch doesn’t even really care for beer and he drank my last one!” Dean finished, and Sam finished laughing. He hadn't laughed like that since their prank wars.
“It’s not even funny Sam shut up let’s go.”
Sam giggled a little and walked behind his older brother and shut the door behind him.
-
“How does this hat make me look?” Dean smiled like an idiot. He had on a purple fedora, with a leopard print scarf wrapped around it, and there was a rather large white feather hanging down that was tied against the hat. The feather tickled Deans nose and he blew on it in hopes it’d fly up and out of his face, but it only managed to fly up and drift slowly back down, touching the tip of his nose.“Dean quit playing around and find the stuff we need so we can get that asshole out of your head” Sam said getting frustrated with his childish brother.
He took off the hat, not because his brother told him to, no, it was because he felt the urge to sneeze. Dean giggled and went back to searching for the things they needed. Sam was on the other side of the store look for witches claw? Paw? something like that. He couldn’t even remember what he was searching for, because next thing he knew, he suddenly felt shakiness, he felt his head pounding and he heard yelling, the screaming in his head. His lungs were getting tight and he was struggling to breathe. he felt like the world was getting darker, everything was getting quieter but the booming in his head only got louder. Michael was banging at the softest parts of his mind and Dean winced at every kick and scream he could hear. Suddenly Sam grabbed his shoulder and Dean could breathe. “Dean, you ready to go?” “Uh yeah yeah..” Dean replies wondering what had just happened in the last 5 minutes while he was stuck in his head and his brother was finding the ingredients. He checked the time on his phone, 3:56.“You good man?” Sam asked.
He trying to figure out how Deans mind was working while Michael was currently living in his mind.
“W-What? Yeah I’m good.” Dean smiled faintly at him.
Sam only nodded back, he knew Dean was lying but he also knew his brother well enough that he wasn’t going to be getting much information about his literal mental state. The two got in the impala and dean drove them back to the bunker. He had a million thoughts racing through his mind. On top of all of this, he also has Michael in his mind. He just wanted him out his mind. Sam was worried about him as well. He was scared that his brother was fading away by the second. Deans thoughts about him being put inside of a box and just thrown into the ocean scared Sam to death. He was scared Dean wanted to do something stupid, but he wasn’t sure how he’d handle living without his brother, his best friend.
-
When they arrived Sam grabbed the stuff they had just bought for the spell and they walked up to the door. When they walked in Dean looked around for Cas.
“Cas?”
Suddenly Cas appeared, walking down the few stairs that dipped into the center of the bunker. Dean and Sam walked down the stairs and saw Cas.
“Sam, Dean” Cas nodded. “You know the spell will give you your greatest desire?” he questioned the brothers.
Dean glided his handed against the map table.
“Cas we know, and I also know that I want Michael out of my head. The faster we do this, the better.” Dean said sounding annoyed.
Sam and Cas both knew he just wanted Michael out and gone and dead. They also knew the risks this could have on Dean. Sam looked up at Cas and nodded towards the library area. Cas followed them and Dean walked to the kitchen, his head pounding.
-
“Cas what if this doesn’t work? You know like what if, what if something bad happens?” Sam was terrified.
He was scared that this spell wasn’t going to work and Dean was just going to have to endure more pain or even worse. “Sam, I’ve done immense research on this specific spell, Dean should be fine.” Cas reassured him. “Man, I’m just scared Michaels going to get loose and take control of the wheel again and we’ll lose Dean.”“Sam, I understand your need to be worried, but don’t be. Dean is stronger than we give him credit for. He’s going to go through with this and he’ll make it. He’ll be okay,” Cas assured him. “He has to be.” He mumbled. “What was that, Cas?” Sam asked confused. “Nothing, just make sure Dean is ready.”
-
Dean was in the kitchen, searching through cabinets. He just wished he could down a hundred bottles of pain reliever. He’d gotten pretty good at hiding the pain. The physical pain, in his head, that is. He found a bottle of something. He read the word “pain” and downed four of the pills. He’d hoped this would subside his headache. He had his eyes closed, his back faced towards the kitchen. His hands were propped on either side of himself on the counter. He was breathing steadily, or at least attempting to. He was scared. Was this spell gonna work? Was Michael going to disappear for good? Or would he at least just go back the other ugly world instead of this one? He wasn’t sure.He did know one thing for sure. He wanted the damned angel out of his head. He was so focused on his breathing and practically praying for the pain to stop he hadn’t realized that his brother walked in. The once silent room was interrupted by Sam walking in the kitchen looking for a glass.
“They’re all dirty.” Dean stayed dryly.
“O-oh” Sam started, “Thats fine. Anyways, how are you doing?”
“You mean with Michael screaming like a son of bitch in my brain?”
Sam winced a little.
“Just peachy.” Dean was annoyed. Not at Sam, or really anyone, just the whole situation. He seemed to always had gotten the bad end of the stick since the death of his mother.
“What’d you take?” Sam asked concerned, picking up the bottle, messing with the label a bit. He’d noticed the pill bottle sitting there on the counter when he walked in, and wasn’t gonna say anything, but he had to.
“Just something for pain. My head’s killing me. I’m ready to get this dick out of my head.”
Sam nodded at him, reading the label. He decided it’d be best to change the subject a little rather than talk about his brother taking some random pills he found in the cabinet.
“Are you ready for later? You think it’ll work? I think it will, Cas definitely thinks it wi-“
“Sammy stop worrying. It’s gonna work.”
“I’m not worried” Sam stuttered. Dean isn’t an idiot. He knows his brother talks a lot when he’s nervous.
“I hope so” Sam let out a breath that he didn’t realize he was holding in.
-
Dean was walking back to his room. He decided to try and maybe take a quick 15, no 30, no 2 hour nap before all hell raised loose. Cas suddenly appeared from around the corner, walking quickly, looking almost paranoid. His shoulder bumped into Dean’s and started the taller man.
“Cas?! Cas what the hell man? H-hey Cas, buddy, you alright?”
“Yes, Dean, I am quite ecstatic about tonight” Cas said, very unenthused. Dean frowned.
Cas glanced up at him, the blue meeting the green. Dean noticed Cas, was he? Was he flustered? No, he couldn’t be.
‘It’s Cas!’, is at least what Dean tells himself anyhow.
Dean smiled, looked down at his boots, “You sure, man? I was just gonna go take a nap before all of-“
“Dean,” Cas interrupted Dean, taking a deep breath.
“Dean, I won’t lie.”
“I don’t expect you to.”
“Dean,”
“Sorry sorry”
“I’m afraid of tonight. I do not to want to foresee anything harming you. You are my best friend after all. Other than Sam of course.” Cas added that extra part at the end about
Sam, and Dean wasn’t sure if he was annoyed or happy that he didn’t leave out his brother. He decided to just ignore it, he glanced up at Cas and smiled. Sex-eyes and all.
“Cas nothing’s gonna happen. It’s all gonna be okay” Dean meant what he said. Sure he was scared, hell terrified even. But that didn’t mean he wasn’t almost 100% sure everything was gonna be okay.
“I sure hope so Dean...I’ll leave you and allow you to partake in that ‘nap’ you were speaking of.”
Dean grimaced at how Cas said the word ‘nap’ and made it sound as if it was a curse word.
Cas began walking the other way, out of the hall, into their living space, which happened to be the room with the map table. Dean walked towards his room.
‘Why did Cas stay by that damned map so much? Maybe he just loves traveling?’
He grabbed the knob, twisted and walked in, plopping himself on his bed. He grabbed his, rather too-big-for-his-head headphones and put them on, playing Led Zeppelin, of course. It calmed him down. Falling asleep listening to a song he loved. “Babe, baby, baby, I'm gonna leave you.
I said baby, you know I'm gonna leave you.”
-
Dean woke up about an hour later, headphones on the floor, ‘Ramble On’ blasting from them. He sat up and leaned down to grab them and switched off the cassette. Yep, Dean’s still got one, but no one is surprised.Dean walked into the living space, and saw Cas sitting in a chair by the map table.
‘Seriously what’s his damn deal with that table?’
“Hey, Cas.”
“Hello, Dean” Cas nodded towards him.
Sam walked in the doorway and glanced between the two. Anyone in the who was in there could feel the weight of sadness that was floating in the room. Like a boulder sinking into quicksand. Cas was unbelievably nervous, and did a pretty amazing job at hiding it. Dean still could see right through him. He is his best friend after all. He could tell Cas was practically pissing himself, at least that is if it angels could actually pee. Dean was shaking on the inside, but kept a strong face on. Mostly for his Sammy. His little brother. He couldn’t care to leave him. He was really praying that whatever happens, happens in the best way. Sam broke the silence.
“We need to gather everything. Put it on the table in the library.”
He was quick to get his words out. He was scared. He was positive that nothing bad would happen but there’s still that glimmer of ‘fuck what if something bad DOES happen?’ in the back of his mind. He pushed those bad thoughts away and began collecting everything. The brothers and the angel all grabbed the supplies and headed towards the library. Setting everything down, Dean became nosy. Looking at every single thing. Rereading everything. He didn’t want to die. He just wanted the archangel out of his head. His head was still pounding. Slightly numbed from whatever those random pills did to him.
-
Sam began mixing everything. Chopping and dumping in. Opening and spilling in. Mixing everything. The spell required some Enochian words from angel, Cas quickly volunteered.
Cas began speaking. Dean suddenly couldn’t help but stare at his lips as he was speaking.
‘What am I thinking?! This is Cas!’ he thought to himself.
After some more words were spoken from the blue-eyed man, there was a strong wind.
“Cas what’s happening?” Sam yelled.
“The spell is working!” Cas yelled back.
Suddenly the wind stopped. It was ridiculously quiet. The spell was supposed to give you your greatest desire? Dean’s was obviously to get Michael out of his head. But the
problem was, his head continued pounding. Yelling and screaming and kicking. Dean winced loudly, collapsing to the floor. He began yelling, everything around him was loud but muffled. He couldn’t hear his brother yelling at him to speak up. He couldn’t hear his best friend telling him words that he thought he’d never hear. Or at least he shouldn’t have heard, but he did. Clear as day. Dean then blacked out.
-
“Dean?!”
‘What the hell?’
“Dean answer me man!”
“Sammy?”
“Dean yes! Thank god you’re okay” Sam cried out
“What happened?” Dean asked looking around confused. He couldn’t have been knocked our more than 2 minutes.
“Dean you passed passed out for 10 minutes.
‘Close enough’, He thought.
Cas suddenly appeared. Dean suddenly remembered what he heard.
“C-cas did y-you-“
“Yes, Dean. And I know what you’re desire was. And it definitely was not Michael like we had all hoped.”
Sam stood back, confused.
“What’s going on?” Sam asked.
“Dean’s greatest desire was, well it was that he lo-“
“I love Cas okay!!”
Sam even more shocked than before spoke up, “Sure man, we all care about him. Why are you bringing it-“
“Sammy I love Cas, I’m in love with a stupid angel.”
Cas frowned, but quickly regained happiness.
“What does this mean? Like why couldn’t you have told me before? Why d-“ Sam was cute off, again, by Dean.
“S-sam I-I don’t know. The spell must’ve really given me a big dose of ‘admit it, you’re in love with the angel’ medicine because that’s all I can feel right now.”
Dean wanted to pass out. He never wanted to admit this to himself, let alone his brother AND then man it’s about. He really wanted to stare Cas in the eyes and grab his face hard. Just kiss him. Be loved. But he knew Cas didn’t feel the same. There was no way. Cas decided to interrupt the two brothers.
“Dean,” Cas swallowed hard. He was undeniably nervous and anyone in a ten mile radius would have been able to tell.
“Dean I’ve loved you since the moment we met.”
Dean was incredibly confused.
“I saw your eyes and I couldn’t explain it. Your presence warmed my vessel.”
Dean grimaced a little, but smiled.
“I am in love with you, Dean Winchester and I want the everyone and the Heavens above to know!” Cas was incredibly excited. Completely different demeanor to him. Dean spoke.
“Cas, I’m scared. Terrified even.”
“Dean, it’s okay, you can be scared. I’m scared. I do not do well with acting on my ‘feelings’”, he said with finger air quotes.
“But Dean, please know that I lov-“, Cas was quickly cut off.
By an angel blade.
“CAS” Dean was running, his feet felt like they weren’t going quickly enough. He began grabbing the man he had just confessed his love to. His Best friend for the past 10 years.
His love. Hell even his soulmate. Dean was crying. Holding onto the angel.
“Cas, Cas baby no no,”
Cas’ breathing was incredibly shallow and slowed down. His breathing was staggered, he sounded like he had holes in his chest, his lungs hurt.
Sam was fighting with what hurt him. The Shadow, a piece of the Empty.
“He didn’t tell you I guess”, she said.
Dean was fighting, he told himself not to look but he couldn’t help it. He glanced over at his best friend.
“Cas gave himself to us!” she said it happily.
“What the hell does that mean?” Sam screamed.
“Well,” she was smiling big. Too big for Dean’s liking.
He wanted to kick in her jaw until it snapped. Shoot her dead. He wanted her, and anyone or anything that has ever hurt Cas, so suffer, to pay for his pain.
He hated seeing him like this. Struggling to breathe.
Whimpering.
“Mr. Castiel here, gave himself to us. He gave his life for Lucifer’s son, the nephilim boy, Jack! It was a pretty trade if you’re asking me.” She was practically laughing.
“Why would he do that?” Sam asked confused.
She didn’t answer.
They knew Castiel cared about Jack, they didn’t need an answer. They just wanted Cas to be okay again.
There was so much blood oozing out of his mouth, foaming.
Dean cried out, loudly, and grabbed Cas’ hand and held it in his palm, against his heart.
Suddenly Cas was choking.
“No baby no no no..” Dean was crying harder. “Hold on please. For me. Please hold on. God, I love you! Damn it Cas! You hear me right?”
Dean’s head reminded him of the loud banging. Michael just wouldn’t rest would he?
Dean looked down and Cas’ wasn’t breathing.
“Cas FUCK no no” Dean fell into Cas’ body and cried.
He felt like he was sobbing for hours. It had only been a minute. He had blood all over his hands but he didn’t care.
He just wanted his best friend.
His love.
Dean was so lost in his thoughts. He was willing to give his souls just for a decade longer with the man he loved.
There was a sudden yelp coming from the direction of the Shadow.
“Don’t, touch, Castiel, ever, AGAIN!”
It was Jacks voice. Jack had grabbed the angel blade from Cas earlier and no one had noticed. Dean too busy praying to anything that would listen. Sam too focused on trying to not get himself or anyone else killed. The Shadow fell to her knees, laughing loudly.
“You can’t win...you won’t win.” was the last thing she said before falling on her back.
Sam noticed finally noticed something. He reached into the bowl that once held all of the ingredients. There wasn't anything left, just a round, shiny pearl. It clicked. Sam set it on the table, took off his flannel and set it on top.
Jack noticed and tried to interject, "Sam what are you doing?"
"I know what I need to do."
Dean was still crying. Not really paying attention to what had just happened.
Suddenly there was a loud bang. The pearl was gone. Dean winced and looked up at Sam.
Cas’ chest starting moving.
Slowly, but moving just enough for Dean’s heart to start thumping even harder in his chest. He thought his heart was going to explode out of his chest. Sam and Jack both smiled and just hugged each other.
“27 minutes” Dean grabbed Cas’ face and pulled him tightly into his chest and kissed the top of his head, without a second thought.
Cas sighed in contentment, still recovering from what had just happened.
“You stopped breathing. You were gone for 27 minutes, you sick bastard!” Dean yelled at the angel.
He wasn’t blaming the angel, but who else was he supposed to yell his love at?