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Magnus hated waking up early on his days off, positively abhorred it, but today he was making an exception. After all, it wasn’t every day that he got to put his favorite school subject to the test.When Magnus had told his father that he was specializing in International relations, he’d been devastated. As a philosophy professor, he’d always urged Magnus to follow the same path toward enlightenment and the understanding of human nature, so Magnus had minored in sociology just to appease his father. Little did he know; his sociology classes would be the only thing to bring him joy. He loved the way it felt to break down the world into causes and consequences, actions and reactions. It made human beings seem so much simpler, and yet infinitely more complex.So on this sunny Saturday morning, he felt no trouble at all roaming the streets of New York, conducting an experiment for his social studies class. The concept was simple enough. They were currently studying human perception and the existence of the Other, so the brilliant Professor Loss had assigned each group the task of asking strangers for help in a way that would inconvenience them and require effort on their part, then analyze their responses.It had been Simon’s idea that they ask people for directions in a different language. The jerk had definitely thrown Magnus under the bus on that one, given that he was the only person in the group that was bilingual, and Maia had readily agreed. So now, there he was, standing on the sidewalk in bright and sunny Brooklyn, holding a piece of paper and trying to get a stranger to help him out.Simon was videotaping the experiment from across the street, while Maia sat at “Java Jones” next door to assist in case they ran into a rage fueled New Yorker. She got a free pass. She was presenting the case study next week.“Excusez-moi, est-ce que vous pouvez me dire où se trouve cet immeuble?”Excuse me, can you tell me where this building is? He waved his piece of paper at a woman who was dressed to the nines in business attire. It was 10 o’clock in the morning on a Saturday. Could New Yorkers maybe like, chill for a minute? The woman went by, naturally, not even sparing him a moment’s notice.You would think a twenty something guy speaking French on a street corner would garner even a tiny bit of attention. Not that kind of attention! After all, the girls in his class kind of went a bit googly-eyed when he broke out the French, but apparently, sidewalk New Yorkers were a different breed, because no one had even lifted his head from his smartphone, and he’s been standing there for an hour already.He understood that the point of the experiment was observing the raw authentic human behavior, but he could really use an iced tea or a shower. Sweat was already rolling down his spine, and his eyes were squinting like crazy from the bright sun. He looked across the street at Simon to express his disgruntlement through the power of glares, because it had been his genius idea to do this in the early morning, when a deep melodic voice broke in “Hey, man. Need some help?”Victory! Magnus turned to start his charade all over again, only to be struck into silence, because wow, this guy was gorgeous. The specimen standing next to him was tall and fit, as evidenced by his white t-shirt. He had jet black hair and the most beautiful hazel eyes, his chin covered in a slight shadow that said “I didn’t shave this morning, and I look Hot with a capital H”.Magnus knew he was staring, but this was just unfair. How did he get the suit wearing, soul-sucking shrews when he’d still been fresh and ready, and this guy got to see him en mode boiled lobster?The guy waved at him, as if to break him from a trance and said “Hello. Are you okay? I was at the café and saw you standing here asking for help”When no reaction was forthcoming, he squinted at Magnus and lowered his head to look him in the eye “Do you need out of the sun? You look kind of peaked”As a matter-of-fact, he felt kind of peaked, but he shook his head to clear it and almost blurted out an “I’m fine” before he remembered the whole reason her was out here. Good job, Magnus. Botch up the one time someone actually stopped to talk to you!He waved his paper again and said “Est-ce que tu sais où se trouve cet immeuble?”The guy’s head reared back, and his eyes widened slightly, and Magnus didn’t know what to make of the reaction. He rubbed his neck and said “Uhh yeah, that explains why no one was able to help, I guess. Do you speak English?”It was a struggle keeping a blank expression on his face, but Magnus managed somehow. He just looked at him curiously, like a deaf guy at a rave.Tall, dark and handsome just shook his head and tried again “English? Um, Anglais?”Keeping up with the charade, Magnus slowly shook his head and said “Je ne parle pas anglais”“Okay, I don’t need to speak French to understand that one. You only speak French and I only speak English. Looks like we’re at an impasse”It was actually endearing how he kept babbling in English despite thinking Magnus didn’t speak the language. His pretty eyes kept fidgeting around them, as if seeking assistance from someone in the vicinity, but surprisingly, he wasn’t leaving. Magnus had fully expected people to just go when they couldn’t figure out how to help him.Tall man just kept mumbling under his breath, looking for something in the pockets of his jeans, which fit like glove, Magnus noticed. It was getting ridiculous thinking of him as some variation of Tall person, so Magnus put on his best impression of a clueless person, pointed at himself and said “Magnus”The guy stopped fidgeting long enough to look up at him, confused. Magnus did it again, and the most beautiful smile broke out on the guy’s face“Is that your name? Magnus? It’s very beautiful! Suits you.”Was it just his imagination, or had this gorgeous stranger just insinuated that he was beautiful? Magnus wasn’t prone to fits of fainting, but he felt reliable to swoon right then and there. He could possibly get away with it, what with the scorching sun and all.The guy pointed at himself and said “Alexander” then he shook his head, miming to Magnus like a nutty game of charades and pointed back at himself “Alec”Magnus kind of like the first one better. It fit him more, he guessed."Alexandre" Magnus nodded his head decisively, conveying to Alexander that he got it.Alexander shook his head "No, no, Alec" and Magnus just looked confused.He didn't know what it said about his own human behavior that he was enjoying rattling this guy as much as he was.Alec just sighed eventually and gestured to the piece of paper Magnus had in his hand "Can I see that?"Magnus held out the paper and Alec took it, scanning the directions written entirely in French. They weren't amateurs after all. The experiment was supposed to be about challenging these poor people. Alec just grumbled some more and started talking, carrying on a one-sided conversation that Magnus really wanted to be part of but couldn't. The Lord really was testing him today "I forgot my phone at home. It had to be today of all days that I go down to get coffee without my cellphone"He looked at Magnus and started miming again, all the while speaking, as if at any moment, Magnus' universal translator chip was going to kick in and he'd magically understand the words "Did you...come here from these directions...or do you...need to find them?"Magnus just shook his head, stifling a smile because this guy was just utterly adorable "Je dois trouver cet immeuble, il est supposé être là, mais je ne le trouve nulle part"I have to find this building. It's supposed to be here, but I can't find it anywhere.He really was going to hell for this, he decided, as he watched a frustrated Alexander rake his hand through his lush dark hair, leaving it standing everywhere."It couldn't be Izzy that came down to get the coffee this morning, could it? At least she took French for a semester and probably knew more words than baguette and fromage"He seemed to realize that he was basically having a monologue on the sidewalk, next to a guy that didn't understand a word he was saying because the most adorable blush spread on his cheeks and he ducked his head in a futile attempt to hide it. He chuckled slightly "I literally lost it. You don't get a word I'm saying and I'm babbling. This is definitely certifiable insanity caused by lack of caffeine and extreme hotness in the vicinity"Two things were clear to Magnus right then. First, he was not going to make it through this if Alexander kept complimenting him. Second, the audio recording that his mic was probably picking up was going to make Maia and Simon's day.This day was looking up exponentially. Magnus buried his delighted smile and started gesturing to the paper Alexander was still keeping hostage "Je dois arriver à cette destination. J'ai déjà perdu beaucoup de temps et j'ai besoin d'aide, et je n'ai sérieusement aucune idée pourquoi je continue toujours à jouer le jeu, sachant très bien que tu ne comprends absolument rien"
I have to get to this destination. I already wasted a lot of time and I need help, and I have no idea why I'm still playing this game when I know that you don't understand a word I'm saying.
Alec was just looking at him, looking positively dazed "Has anyone ever told you that you speaking French is absolutely lethal? because wow"Okay, that time, Magnus had to look away because nothing could stop his smile. He should feel bad that this beautiful hopelessly helpful guy was saying all this stuff, unaware that Magnus was understanding every word, but really, what was the harm? It was just innocent flirtation that was half-lost in translation.Alexander suddenly clapped his hands together and affected a serious expression "Okay, game plan. We need some way to get you where you need to be, and I don't know any French. I can't even begin to mime going to my house to get my phone because you'd probably scream bloody murder, so we're doing the next best thing"He put out his hand, palm up, and nodded at Magnus to take it. Curiosity and a heavy dose of attraction made Magnus follow the order. What was the worst that could happen? If Alexander turned out to be Ted Bundy's long-lost cousin and tried to charm him into an early grave, Simon and Maia would be right behind him to step in, although Maia would probably let him croak just for being stupid enough to go with a serial killer, but oh well, at least he'd die looking at someone pretty.Resolute to follow this development to its conclusion, Magnus put his hand in Alec's and looked up at him. Alec hissed out a breath, probably affected by the electricity that coursed through their skins as their hands touched, then he smiled at Magnus reassuringly and started walking down the street, keeping a slow enough pace for Magnus' sake.Magnus stole a look at his left to see Simon walking parallel to them across the street, a flabbergasted expression on his face, his camera still rolling. There wasn't much he could explain with his hand in Alexander's, but his phone started vibrating in his pocket. It was probably Maia bracing to tell him to stop this charade and let this guy know what was really going on, except Magnus didn't want to. He wanted to go where Alec wanted to take him, see this beautiful face a bit more, and maybe see if he could get a few more compliments out of him while he was at it.“Alexandre, Tu m'emmènes où exactement ?" Where are you taking me? Magnus asked.Alec just smiled and continued walking “Okay, I really really like how my full name sounds in French, or maybe it’s just you saying it, I don’t know! I can’t seem to stop talking, and you’re not looking at me like I’m crazy yet, which I’m taking as a good sign”The sun was shining through the trees that adorned the sidewalk, playing an elaborate game of hide and seek with Alexander’s eyes, and Magnus could feel a whole swarm of butterflies in his stomach, jumping around, flailing and basically saying “This one, this one! Can we keep him, pretty please?”.Magnus agreed, mind you. Alec was handsome, well mannered, a true gentleman and actually seemed to fancy him. The avenue by which said information was acquired was questionable at best, and morally corrupt at worst, and he could hear his father’s disappointment in his ear, telling him that this has gone far beyond the limits of a social experiment, but Magnus had always been one to follow his heart, and the opinionated muscle was dancing a beat to Alec’s steps, eager to see what was going to happen next.They walked for two blocks, during which Alexander kept up a titillating one-sided conversation. Magnus would chime in from time to time with a sentence or two, just enough to see that lopsided smile come over Alec’s face as he listened to the stream of incomprehensible French.Alec turned the corner, then ducked into a shaded corner, pulling Magnus to a stop beside him. The gesture brought them close, and Alec sucked in a breath, stealing a glance at Magnus’ lips. They stayed there, simply breathing the same air and reveling in the intimacy of the possibilities, until a random guy plowed into Magnus nearly propelling him some feet away. New York sidewalks were tougher than the Hunger Games. Alec just smiled at him, murmuring “Easy there”, and Magnus wanted to gobble up the sound with his lips. They looked so soft and inviting and weren’t French people viewed as these utter liberals that just pranced around in the nude and were super chill about everything? He was sure Alexander would consider a quick stolen kiss a simple token of his appreciation.Sadly, Magnus couldn’t even convince himself of that! He sighed, positively breaking the spell, and Alec straightened from his slouched-up stance. He pointed to a shop next to them where a window display proudly proclaimed the store to be “The Hunter’s moon bookshop”. From what Magnus could see, it was a quaint little place that gave a feel of warmth and coziness. It was the type of spot Magnus and Maia would explore on a random day out, hunting for early editions of Jane Austen or the Brönté sisters.Alexander started doing the mime again, looking adorably flustered as he tried to explain to Magnus that the owner was a relative. He made a bunch of hand motions that were supposed to spell out “family” probably, but all Magnus got from them was a hedgehog hugging a tree. Man, the guy must be brutal in a game of charades!Magnus took pity on him and tilted his head curiously, guessing “Famille?” and Alec’s face lit up “Yes, that’s right. Famille, that sounds like family, right?”He chuckled self-deprecatingly and said “Man, I must be getting better at this whole miming thing, or I’m actually teaching you English with this whole immersion thing I’m putting you through”Magnus couldn’t help it. He smiled at him and said, meaning every word “T’es la personne la plus magnifique que j’ai jamais rencontrée”
You’re the most incredible person I’ve ever met.
Alec got that exclusive French smile on his face, and rubbed the back of his neck as he replied “That was a whole bunch of French I didn’t get, but I think that was a compliment. If not, don’t tell me. Let me leave in the illusion, please”He then pushed through the shop door, the little bell tinkering above them. A gruff voice sounded from somewhere inside “Coming!” followed by footsteps as a tall strapping man came out of what Magnus assumed was a storage space.He was tall and fit like Alec, but where Alec was as pale as they came, this man had skin the color of warm cocoa, and Magnus couldn’t help but feel at ease at the laugh lines that spelt out a map of happiness and good humor on his face.He looked at the two of them, then zeroed in on their joint hands. Magnus hadn’t even realized that he was still holding Alec’s hand. The man then looked back at him with renewed vigor and Magnus recognized that stare down for what it was. He’d seen his father give that stink eye to every guy, and girl he’d ever brought home. The parental look of anticipated censure.“Hey Luke. I need your phone for a sec” Alec started, oblivious to the way Luke’s eyeballs were laser beaming Magnus to the spot. How he got himself in these situations, he’ll never know! If Simon had figured out a way to shoot through the store window, as unlikely as that was, the footage would be prime content for an AFV skit.“Well, hello Alec. Top of the morning to you too, son”, the guy, Luke, arched a brow at Alec, crossing his arms and still staring them down.Alec sheepishly cringed and said “Hi, sorry for the haste. We’re just in a lurch”. He then turned to Magnus, letting go of his hand, and Magnus wanted to scream and stomp his feet and yell “Give it back! It’s my hand now!” but luckily got enough feedback from his brain that that would be certifiable before he could execute the plan.He pointed to Luke and said “Luke” and Magnus genuinely wanted to laugh. This was reaching astronomical levels of ridiculous, but he was deep in shit now, might as well wade through it. He smiled at the huffing man and waved like a good little Samaritan, or French to be accurate.“Salut Luke, ça va?” Hello, Luke. How are you?Luke naturally seemed flustered by this development, because he blinked at him a couple of times then turned back to Alec and said “When did you get yourself a French boyfriend, Alec? I could swear only last night; you were single and moping into a tub of Ben & Jerry’s”Alec rolled his eyes then started to explain the whole serendipity of their meeting to Luke, but Magnus had stopped paying attention because his brain was snagging on two very important details. The “boyfriend” comment, which confirmed that Alec was attracted to guys and that his compliments weren’t just random ramblings, and the second was that he was single, at least until last night. Magnus had interrupted the guy’s morning coffee run, so he was just going to go ahead and assume the status remained unchanged. Sweet pretty Alexander was single and into him, and he’d actually been worried about this Saturday morning going to shit! He felt like dancing a jig, except for the little nagging detail that was his whole experiment and how Alec was going to respond to it.By the time Magnus focused back on the two men in front of him, Luke was fishing his phone out of his pocket and handing it to Alec, who typed some things on the screen, before an automated voice asked “Bonjour Magnus, comment vas-tu aujourd’hui?”Good morning Magnus, how are you today? Magnus adorned an exclamation worthy of the Tony awards at the very least, making sure to nod several times and start spewing random French. Alec just shook his head and shoved the phone at him to type it out.Magnus switched the translating languages on the Google Translate page and wrote down the directions he needed. The automated voice then told Alec, and he nodded his head in understanding. They then played a wild game of telephone where they exchanged the phone back and forth until Magnus had every fake intel he had written down on his fake paper to get to his fake meeting at its fake location. And suddenly, there was no more reason to dally around.It seemed that Alec had come to the same conclusion because he started fidgeting, clenching and unclenching his fist, words stuck on the tip of his tongue but unwilling to spill out.This was the moment Magnus was supposed to clear his throat, get his shit together and explain the plot. The whole point of the experiment had been reached. He’d gotten Alec’s full response. This was the point where he explained that he was a student, thank him for his cooperation and walk out the door. He urged his mouth to open and for actual English words to come out, but rien. He didn’t want to break the spell, and he had a feeling that the moment he told Alec what was going on, the guy would be mortified about what he’d said and never look him in the eye again.Magnus was being an idiot. He was never seeing this guy again anyway, but for some inane reason, he wanted to be preserved in his memory as the cute French guy he found on the sidewalks of Brooklyn on a sunny Saturday. It was the perfect meet cute, or the beginning of a cheesy Nicholas Sparks movie adaptation, but it would be memorable in the best way. Alexander would always look back on this day and remember Magnus, maybe even compare every guy he met next to him, look for his accent in every French play. He didn’t want to be the guy that fooled him for a case study, that took advantage of his generosity and chivalry for a grade, even if he was all that and more.That was when Magnus realized he was full blown crushing. Forget attraction or casual interest, Magnus had dived in, head first into the abyss of unattainable crush. Excuse his French, but he was royally fucked.He needed to leave. Simon and Maia were probably going crazy out there, and he had to get out before he said anything to make Alec hate him. They could try another street for their experiment, even if his excitement had evaporated into thin air at the reality of never seeing Alec again. He smiled at him and said “Merci! Pour tout! Je sais que tu ne comprendras pas ça mais je crois sincèrement que je ne vais jamais t’oublier. J’espère que j’ai marqué ta journée un tout petit peu. Rappelle-toi du mec qui t’as fait craquer en parlant français. Et une dernière chose, Alec, tu me plais tellement et je regrette ne pas pouvoir te le dire”
Thank you! For everything! I know you won’t understand this but I honestly think that I’ll never forget you. I hope I left a mark on your day, just a little. Remember the guy that made you swoon by speaking French. And one last thing, Alec, I like you a lot, and I regret not being able to tell you that.
As he talked, Alec kept trying to hand him the phone, probably to type the words into the translator, but Magnus didn’t want these words tainted by the automated voice, chopping up his heartfelt desires into stilted sentences that couldn’t possibly convey the depth of his emotions. So, he shook his head sadly at Alec, raised a hand in goodbye and said “Au revoir, Alexandre”Alec stammered behind him “Wait…Shit… Fu-“Just as he put his hand on the door knob, the automated translator voice said “puis-je avoir ton numéro de téléphone?” Can I have your phone number?Magnus froze for a second, his back still to Alec’s, his eyes probably comically wide as he debated his next move. He could turn back around and give him his digits, make this a bit harder than it already was, play the long game and let the repercussions be tomorrow’s problem, but he wouldn’t be able to live with himself. He’d messed up enough already, so he turned the handle and left the shop, the tinkling of the bell a last wave goodbye.Maia dropped into the seat next to Magnus with a sigh that encompassed a great deal of exhaustion, which seemed a little excessive for a regular Wednesday morning. He turned to her and nearly jumped in his seat.“Holy hell, Maia! What make up are you using? The zombie palette?”She just rolled her freakishly sunken eyes at him “Hardy har har! I feel like a warmed-up death burrito”“Why are you trying to ruin burritos for me at 9AM on a Wednesday?”“Because it’s your fault I was up all night. I was preparing my speech for the presentation”“How is that my fault? We did the experiment and analyzed the data a week ago”“Ugh, don’t be logical and blame me for procrastinating. I need caffeine”A cup was unceremoniously plopped down on her desk, and they both looked up to see Simon standing there with his ever-present half smile, holding a Starbucks tray with two other cups in it. Maia wasted no time inhaling the dark roast.“I need a million dollars”, Magnus joked since Simon seemed in such a giving mood. Simon just rolled his eyes at him and plopped the cup in front of him with hostility. Don’t argue with him about how a cup can be put down with hostility! He knew what he knew!“Why are you both attacking me this morning? Haven’t I suffered enough for our worthy cause?”Maia groaned and briefly dislodged her lips from where they seemed to be surgically attached to the rim of the cup, enough to grumble at Simon “Is he still moping? How is still moping? It’s been a week”Simon put the cup back at her mouth level, aware of their imminent demise if she didn’t get more caffeine in her bloodstream and sighed “I think it’s romantic. The undestined love, the story that wasn’t meant to be. Magnus, stop pouting. Dot just tripped over the aisle. You know she can’t handle the pouting, man!”Okay, so maybe Magnus had been a bit of a mess over the past week. He’d tried his best to forget about Alec and just be his usual charming cheerful self, but it seemed that his heart had gone into mourning for those mesmerizing hazel eyes, and his hand kept tingling from Alec’s phantom touch, and he just wanted to see his face again. He listened to the recording of Alec’s voice at least once a day, and thought about going back to the coffeeshop or the Hunter’s moon at least three times a day, but always felt like he couldn’t breathe when he envisioned telling Alec the truth about their meeting and chickened out like the coward he was.As his pining grew worse, his friends had been getting shorter and shorter with him, especially after he demanded Alec’s part of the experiment be removed. It just didn’t feel right to put his words on blast, when he’d basically laid his heart on his sleeve. It cheapened his memory of that day, and call him crazy, but he was fiercely protective of that memory. After all, it was all he had.They were still using his response as an indicator in the study, they were just showing muted footage of Alec helping him. According to Simon, people could still see the googly-eyes they were making at each other even from across the street, but Magnus just ignored him. Simon could find a love story between a fern and a jellyfish, so his opinion was biased at best.Professor Loss walked in then, putting a stop to all side conversations as she basically floated to her desk, nimble and agile and a total queen at what she did. She put down her bag and looked up at them with a self-satisfied smile “I looked over your material for the case study, and I have to say, I was actually impressed with what you guys accomplished. There were, of course, some exceptions, but for the most part, you all made this experiment a unique concept and I can’t wait to see your presentations. We’ll start from the top: Camille, Raphael and Heidi, floor’s yours”So, on it went, groups presenting the various ways they tackled the experiment, some acting blind and some being complete dipshits as they asked for help. Somehow, Magnus’ group ended up going last, and by the time their names were called, Maia was looking semi-alive, Simon was basically vibrating in his seat and Magnus just wanted it all to end so he could go home and mope a bit more. He didn’t have another class today. Maybe he’d finally work up the courage to go by “Java Jones” and ask the barista about their most beautiful client, because really, there was only one answer to that question, and that was Alexander.They stood at the front of the class as Maia got her notes ready at the podium and Simon set up the slides. Professor Loss asked, as she did for every group “So, explain first what was the difficulty you proposed in your experiment”Maia quickly explained that since Magnus was bilingual, it felt fitting to ask people to help a person they thought to be a foreigner.“And Magnus, you were comfortable playing this part?” Professor Loss interjected.Magnus stepped forward and answered “Yes, Ma’am. I was born in Paris, and spent the first twelve years of my life in the city, before my family and I relocated to the States. I felt very capable of playing the role of a French tourist”Magnus and his father had moved to New York shortly after his mom died. His father often told him that Paris had always been hers, and that being there without her felt like encroaching on a ghost’s sanctuary. He’d wanted a clean slate for both of them, away from the septic smell of hospitals and reminders of a loved one’s death on every street corner. Magnus had always understood his father’s trepidation. He’d wanted to hang on to the familiarity of his hometown when Paris had felt like it didn’t belong to him anymore, and Magnus wasn’t equaling the loss of his mother to an hour-long acquaintance, but he couldn’t help but feel like Brooklyn was Alexander’s now. Every corner would echo with the sound of his voice, and every ray of sunshine would feel barren without those hazel eyes for it to reflect upon.He let Maia continue after that, explaining the results of their experiment and how only four people out of the thirty they’d asked for assistance had bothered to stop and help. She detailed how every person’s assistance went, linking their findings to source material they studied in class. She waxed poetic about Merleau-Ponty and his ideals that humans were meant to assist and help each other perceive the world around them, negated Descartes’ ideals about the ultimate existence of a person in complete disregard of other people, and talked about Sartre’s idea that the Other was there to inconvenience us, push us out of our comfort zone. It was his infamous quote that got Magnus’ attention:
“We make our own hell out
of the people around us”
Magnus decided that the guy was right. We need others to make ourselves vulnerable; We need others to push us beyond what we think we are able to accomplish, and it feels like absolute hell, Magnus could attest to that, but it was also freeing in a way. Because these people, these game changers you met once in a while that shook you up and left you in hell, put their mark on you and make you see life in a different way. So, who was he to argue with Jean-Paul Sartre? The guy had had no fucks to give and had lived his life believing that making choices was what made you who you are.Magnus was making his, right then, right there standing in a rickety old auditorium, listening to his best friend drone on about human behavior. He ought to be studying his own. He let the most wonderful guy slip through his fingers because he was afraid of some sign of rejection. He thought he was better off on his own, leaving him only with the memory of their encounter. He forgot that life was more than memories, it was also actions and moments and feelings that weren’t yet diluted by the tinge of time.He was going after his guy! He was scouring the streets of Brooklyn until his eyes looked into those hazel orbs again. He would beg Luke to give him Alec’s phone number and go from there, but he was done moping.Applause accompanied his proclamation, and for a second Magnus worried he’d actually spewed all that out loud, only to realize that Maia had finished the presentation and was collecting her notes diligently. Makes much more sense!As they walked back to their places, professor Loss was exercising the superpower all teachers had to cram the most amount of information into the last minute of class as she told them what reading to prepare and what topics they were discussing in the next session, and finally clapped her hands for everyone’s attention and said loudly “Oh, and before I forget. I want you all to welcome my new TA. I asked him to attend class today so he can become more familiar with you guys and I think he-… Oh there you are, Alec. Come on down, please”Magnus felt the bottom drop out of his stomach as he looked up the aisle to see none other than the object of his every waking thought sprint down the stairs to the front of the class. Alec was wearing a green button-up shirt, dark blue jeans and a tweed brown blazer, his loose Saturday outfit nowhere to be seen. His hair was tamer than it had been on Saturday and he wore a blank expression on his face as he passed by Magnus without the slightest hint of recognition. It was like Magnus was a ghost.He felt like the air had been sucked out of the room. His limbs were both heavy and he could feel the dread coiling in his stomach. This situation was worst than anything he’d envisioned, because every time he imagined telling Alexander, he got to control the narrative. He got to make the whole thing sound as innocent and unseemly as possible. He could only imagine what Alec must feel right now. The mortification and embarrassment! He never wanted to be the reason someone so pure hearted felt that way, especially not Alec, but it seemed Sartre didn’t take into account that sometimes, we’re not as important as the choices we make. Sometimes, we’re only as important as the choices made for us.He shuffled into his seat, barely listening as Professor Loss explained Alec’s duties and how students could contact him during office hours. He barely listened as the bell rung and people started shuffling out of the room. His eyes were glued to Alec’s every move, as he tried to come up with some form of apology that would actually be worthy of him.Maia basically had to carry his catatonic body through the aisle, down the stairs and out of the room, where she and Simon cornered him against the door “That’s him, isn’t it? I mean, what are the odds that two guys look the same and have the same name, right?”“But also, what are the odds that he turns out to be the TA?” Simon piped up, looking absolutely fascinated.“Yeah, it’s him” Magnus confirmed, voice cracking. “Just go ahead, guys. I need to talk to him”Maia’s gaze softened as she put an arm around his shoulders “Oh honey, do you need us to stick around, maybe explain to him that you’ve been a mess without him and how it was never your intention to hurt him?”Magnus actually cracked a smile at that. Maia rarely showed her soft underbelly, and she knew he was a sucker for those few precious moments when she did “Nah, I’m good. You go ahead”They both wished him good luck, and Simon started humming Céline Dion’s The Power of Love like a dork, walking backward and making finger guns at him, until Maia grabbed his collar and forcibly turned him around.It didn’t take long for Alexander to exit the auditorium. He didn’t look surprised to see him there, just sidestepped him and walked by toward the exit. Okay, that one hurt, a lot.“Alec, can you please stop for a second?” Magnus started, rushing to catch up with his long stride.Alec just huffed and kept going, upping the pace. At this rate, they were practicing for the Olympics’ race walking.“Alec, please. Would you let me explain?”“I don’t know, Magnus. How about you ask me in French?”, he snarled.Magnus stopped in the middle of the busy hall and said “Alexandre, je t’en supplie! Donne-moi une minute pour t’expliquer”I’m begging you! Give me one minute to explain.Alec stopped ahead and heaved an enormous breath, then doubled back to Magnus and got in his face “Was it fun for you? Making a complete fool of me as I tried to explain shit you already knew and told you stuff I wouldn’t have said if I knew you could understand me? Did you and your friends laugh about the guy who was stupid enough to waste his morning trying to play charades with you?”He was heaving, his distress obvious, and Magnus felt the sheen of tears cover his eyes. He’d done this. He’d made Alec feel like crap about helping a complete stranger, and he had to live with that fact, but he also wasn’t giving up on him.He lifted his hand, about to brace it against Alec’s forearm when he remembered their location. People weren’t paying them much attention. Everyone seemed to be rushing into their next class, but Magnus wanted to do this in private.“Can we please go somewhere quiet and talk about this? Please”Alec looked around as if also coming to realize they were in the middle of the Department of Philosophy. He considered for a second, then blew out a breath, mumbling what Magnus thought was “I can’t believe I’m doing this” then looked up at him “Catarina’s office is empty. She has another class right now and doesn’t have office hours today. We can talk there”He turned back and started walking, not waiting for Magnus’ response, not that Magnus would chance another missed opportunity to talk to Alec. He hurried after him through the hall, turning left then coming to Professor Loss’ office door. Magnus had been there plenty of times in the past for office hours, but as he watched Alec fit the key through the lock, couldn’t help feeling like he was venturing into it for the very first time, feeling off-kilter and hesitant.Alec put his messenger bag on the desk then leaned against it, crossing his ankles and crossing his arms. He didn’t have to do more. The defensive gesture was noted. He gave Magnus a speaking glance, and waited. The shy flustered guy from Saturday was nowhere to be found, but Magnus discovered he liked this side of him just the same. It was self-assured and confident and Magnus had the faint idea that there was nothing about this guy he wouldn’t like.“Alright, I guess I should start from the beginning. When we thought of doing the experiment, we considered all different kinds of difficulties, but since I already spoke French-““I don’t need a play by play. I was there for your presentation” Alec cut in, “I want to understand why you didn’t just tell me that was the point of it after I gave you the response you wanted; Why let me believe that you were just a guy I met and that made me feel… You know what, I’m not spelling it out for you”“You think I didn’t feel something there? Why do you think I didn’t say anything? It was because I didn’t want you to feel like it was just a ploy or a stupid prank”“So, you lied to me out of pity”“No, God no! You’re not listening to me, Alexander. I didn’t want you to think that because I couldn’t bare the thought of you hating me! I figured I’d rather leave you with a quaint little memory of a guy you flirted with”“I wouldn’t really call it flirting” Alec grumbled, looking down at his suede shoes.Magnus actually smiled then “Oh, it was flirting, trust me! And it was received, appreciated and thoroughly reciprocated by the way”Alec arched a brow at him, a smirk playing on the edge of his soft lips “Yeah? Then why did you refuse to give me your phone number?”“Because it meant that I would have to keep up the lie, and I couldn’t do that, to either of us”“You could’ve told me the truth” Alec reiterated, and Magnus arched his own brow at him “Can you honestly tell me that you wouldn’t have changed your mind?”“Dammit, no I can’t! I don’t know for sure, and it’s killing me that you might be right”“It’s not bad that you have unshakable morals. I just didn’t want to face your rejection, I guess. So, what I’m trying to say is, I’m sorry! I’m sorry for lying to you, for leaving that bookstore and for making you feel like you were a joke. That’s the furthest thing from how I wanted to make you feel”Alec stared him down, clearly looking for some iota of dishonesty in his gaze, then eventually nodded his head and said “Apology accepted”Magnus blew out a breath, feeling the weight of the world dislocate from his shoulders. He smiled at Alec and said “Thank you”Alec smiled back, then his eyes started looking around and a coat of awkwardness permeated the room. Eventually, he cleared his throat and pushed off from the desk “Well, I guess that’s settled then. I’ll… see you in class or something”Magnus felt like he’d skipped some part of this conversation. He could feel his brow creasing with confusion “Wait, what?”Alec was fingering the strap on his messenger bag, focusing too hard on the task as he said “Well, you apologized and I accepted it. I guess that’s it, then. What’s more to say?”“Uh, plenty. Wait, am I reading this wrong? Because I could swear you asked for my phone number on Saturday”Alec looked up at that, gaze wary and uncertain “Well, you didn’t really give it to me, so I don’t know what to think”Magnus smiled. This was the moment where he took a leap of faith. How many times did you meet someone that embodied everything you’ve ever wanted on a random day, then got to have a do-over? Magnus wasn’t messing with the universe’s mojo today; He was following the signs “I think…that I want to give you that phone number, if you still want to have it”.He moved closer, emboldened by the flare of light that shined in Alec’s eyes at his words “And I think I want you to use that number, preferably to text me a time where you’re free, because I think… I want to ask you out. No!” he lifted a finger theatrically “I know that I want to ask you out”Alec settled back into the edge of the desk, spreading his legs as Magnus moved slowly between them. He gently brought his hand up to Alec’s jaw, skimming the clear skin with his fingertips “You shaved” he asked in wonder, mesmerized by the feel of Alec’s skin.Alec’s eyes were at half mast as he hoarsely whispered “Yeah, I wanted to look presentable for my first day on the job”‘Hmm…Alexander?” Magnus whispered back, their breaths mingling in the small space they were slowly breaching.“Yeah?” Alec opened his eyes, smiling gently.“You still haven’t answered me”“Didn’t I? Well, it appears I have some conditions first”. He wrapped his arms around Magnus’ waist as he said the words, bringing him closer yet, until their chests brushed and electricity was a living wire between them.Magnus felt his breath stutter, then launch back with renewed vigor, his lungs sighing out at the feel of the man touching him.“Name them” Magnus teased, brushing his nose against Alec’s, hands curling around his forearms.Alec tilted his head up, mock thinking and Magnus couldn’t take it. He leaned forward and put his lips on Alec’s clean shaved jaw. He could feel Alec’s breath hitch, then he smiled like the cat that ate the canary and said “First condition: You never lie to me again, for whatever reason”Magnus was nodding before Alec even finished the words. He’d learnt his lesson “Promise”.Alec seemed satisfied enough with that, because he nodded and continued “Good. Now the second condition: you still speak French to me at random times, preferably when I’m feeling down”Magnus actually laughed out loud at that one “Oh, Mr. Alexandre aime bien quand je lui parle français alors?”
Mr. Alexander likes it when I speak French to him, then?
Alec gave an exaggerated full body shiver that had Magnus cracking up.“No but seriously, you speaking French is my kryptonite, just so you know.” Alec sighed then and said morosely “Now my last condition”Magnus looked at him curiously, moving his hands up Alec’s arms to loop them around his neck “Hit me”“Kiss me” whispered the most beautiful thing that had happened to Magnus’ life. He felt powerless to deny him. He leaned forward, touching his lips gently to Alec’s, initiating first contact. He gently deepened the pressure, coaxing Alec’s lips into a rhythm and a dance only they knew the steps to, and Alec released a low moan and tightened his hold on Magnus.They stayed there for what felt like hours, but was probably minutes, letting their lips tell stories they were finally ready to write, initiating a game where both parties got to win, their hearts both referees and players.They had found each other on a sunny morning on a sidewalk where words were lost in translation. They were choosing each other on an office desk, intertwined to the point where their hearts felt like they were beating as one, and Magnus realized that not all human behavior needed to be studied and prodded and analyzed. Some human behavior, he decided, just needed to be felt.