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Tony Stark woke up alone.It wasn’t exactly a new occurrence; he’d been doing it for years - ever since his last relationship with one Pepper Potts went down in flames two years ago, and he rebuilt the walls around his heart just that little bit higher - so the realisation that he was lying on his back in his bed in the Tower should not have come as a shock... but it did.Something was wrong.It took a handful of seconds for Tony’s foggy brain to fully come back online, but once it did he sat up rather abruptly and stared at his surroundings, head spinning and heart pounding.
I didn’t fall asleep here last night.
Tony’s brain scrambled to recall what it could of the night before: the euphoric high that came with finally solving a complex problem that had been bothering him for days; frantically typing on a tablet and furiously scribbling equations or sketching design ideas on loose sheets of paper; slumping down on the sofa when he’d finally written everything down, drained and exhausted. He was going to close his eyes, just for a minute...He’d fallen asleep on the sofa, surrounded by papers and pens that had run out of ink. He still had black stains on his fingers from his scrawling, proving Tony’s memory to be at least somewhat accurate - so how had he ended up here?Unexpected noise startled Tony and sent a flare of panic up his spine. There was a loud clatter, and then a muffled curse. Intruders?“Shh!!” someone hissed in the hallway, and Tony’s heart rate increased. He was supposed to be the only person in the penthouse of the Tower; in fact, there wasn’t anybody but him on the top thirty floors. Pepper was gone, Rhodey was deployed God-knew-where and the Avengers had moved to the Compound months ago. He hasn’t spoken to the rest of the team since Siberia...Tony didn’t know if he was glad no one else was around to get hurt, or horrified that he was trapped and forced to fight alone. Again.Tony cast his eyes around for the bracelets that would call his suit, but they weren’t where they should be, on the bedside table; they must have been left in living room when he was moved-A sudden flurry of noise-The bedroom door slammed open-“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!”Tony stared.Peter, cheeks flushed and eyes shining bright, held a birthday cake delicately with both hands. A striped blue and red party hat sat jauntily on top of his waves of messy brown hair and he was beaming. A couple of steps behind Peter stood Loki, green and gold party hat no doubt placed on his head against his will, a flat, unimpressed look decorating his handsome face. But Tony could see the way his eyes were twinkling with something close to mischief and had no doubt that the mage had something planned. And behind the Jotun stood...“Rhodey!?”For a split second, Tony wondered whether he was hallucinating.“Hey, Tones,” his oldest friend replied, a smile quirking his lips. “Happy birthday.”“How... what... you were deployed! And Loki, you were on Asgard, how...?”“JARVIS and the midget-”“Hey!”“-decided you should not celebrate alone. Hence we were summoned-”“You were happy to help!”“-and the Midgardian army lied to and deceived-”“No!! Don’t tell him that!”“-and the young truant-”“YOU SAID YOU WOULDN’T TELL!!”Loki grinned. Peter looked ready to slap him in the face with the cake. Rhodey rolled his eyes. Before Tony could ask just what exactly Peter had gotten up to, the bots rolled into the room, beeping and trilling excitedly. Someone - presumably Peter - had attempted to tie colourful party hats to the bots’ heads, but Dummy’s was already falling off as the bot zoomed around the room gleefully. Dummy, U and Butterfingers all had helium balloons taped to their metal frames, and there was a small drone perched on Butterfingers’ head. Tony realised it was the Spider Drone - nicknamed Itsy Bitsy - from the upgraded Spider-Man suit when Karen’s familiar voice drifted from it.“Happy birthday, boss. We wish you a day as wonderful as you.”Tony could feel tears welling up in his eyes, and he was ridiculously grateful when JARVIS closed the blinds and dimmed the lights. At first, he thought his AI was merely trying to rescue what was left of his dignity, but as the darkness closed around the small group Loki clicked his fingers and the candles on the rather wonky birthday cake burst into beautiful sparkling flames. They glowed a gorgeous scarlet and gold, sparks dancing in the air around them.“Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you...”As Peter, Rhodey, Karen, JARVIS and even Loki began to sing, the bots beeping along, Tony felt his heart clench.He had lost so much over the last couple of years... but he still had his family.Itsy Bitsy zoomed around the room, a streamer trailing behind him. When the song came to an end and everybody cheered, Dummy and Butterfingers managed to team up and explode a party popper. Strings of coloured tissue paper landed on Peter and Rhodey’s heads, but somehow miraculously avoided Loki’s, and Tony couldn’t have stopped his not-at-all-watery smile if he tried.Peter enthusiastically presented Tony with a slice of cake, and Tony didn’t have the heart to tell him that he was, thanks to JARVIS’ meddling, currently on a diet, and that he was pretty sure not even Tony Goddamn Stark could convince the world that cake was totally a vegetable and absolutely counted as one of his five a day.Fuck it. Peter had puppy eyes that could bring even the most corrupt dictator to his knees, and Tony was wrapped around the teenager’s finger like a god damn ring (even if said teenager hadn’t quite realised it yet). Not even Satan himself could have resisted Peter’s adorable charm, and Tony wasn’t even going to try.Plus, JARVIS would probably just make him do extra laps later to burn off the calories, like the heathen he was. The AI had no mercy.“Thank you,” Tony said softly, struggling to adjust to the squishy feeling that had suddenly appeared in his chest. Perhaps he was having a heart attack. It couldn’t possibly be because Tony had contracted a sudden case of the warm and fuzzies. No, sir. Absolutely not.As Tony sat, munching on homemade birthday cake made with far too much icing and just the right amount of love, surrounded by his family made of metal and Midgard and magic, he felt the last of the Siberian ice coating his heart melt away. He felt warm. Safe. Loved. His scars were still there, but they didn’t hurt anymore.
This must be what it feels like to heal.
JARVIS must have mistaken his contemplative silence for worry, because his AI spoke up to reassure him.“Don’t worry sir, I’ve cleared your schedule for the day. Your meetings have been moved and there is nothing urgent to be dealt with. Although Mr Parker assures me that it is imperative you try the game known as Cluedo-”“It’s so much fun!”“-as he feels that you would beat everyone else at Monopoly.”“We gotta try that, then. I love winning,” Tony said with a grin.“Noooo, I suck at Monopoly,” Peter protested dramatically.“There’s no way in hell I’m playing Monopoly with Tones. He’d have the entire bank within ten minutes.”“And it takes ages,” Peter flopped down on Tony’s bed and stuffed another bite of cake in his mouth.“Plus, God of Evil over here would just magic up more money every time we weren’t looking,” Rhodey added, siding with Peter.Loki smiled, the picture of innocence... if you were blind.Tony couldn’t verbally explain why he found the devious god so attractive - words were too pitiful to adequately capture such otherworldly beauty, as far as Tony was concerned - but photographic evidence would probably suffice. Loki’s smirk did things to Tony that he still hadn’t admitted to, but what really made the engineer’s heart flutter was Loki’s expression when Peter accidentally flicked icing at him and a white blob landed on the Norse god’s nose.Peter’s jaw dropped and his eyes widened comically. Rhodey sniggered. Loki’s face was one of utter shock, like he couldn’t believe that icing would dare to land on his perfect skin.But Loki’s shock quickly turned to a smirk, wrapped in something a little dark and a little sharp and totally brilliant, and his eyes glinted with gleeful mischief, and his whole face just seemed to come alight. Every time Loki was about to do something hilarious or ridiculous or troublesome, from playing pranks to enacting revenge, his eyes danced with emerald magic that whispered I’m about to go seeking danger and adventure, I’m about to leap and I’m going to dive right over the edge, I’m jumping into a fatal freefall and it’s going to be beautiful and everything in Tony just screamed back take me with you.Looking at Loki when he was lit up with magic and mischief and carefree joy was like being enchanted, and Tony was ensnared in the mage’s spell.It had taken a long time to get over Pepper, but when Tony’s looked at Loki, he couldn’t help but think every day I would be taking the risk of letting you break me, and I would do it anyway, because I think I could love you.And I’m kind of hoping that you could maybe love me too..Loki might be mysterious and rebellious and riddled with daddy problems a mile wide, but Tony wasn’t exactly the poster child for perfect either. He was just as defensive and untrusting and dishonest and it didn’t matter. Because when Loki wrote I <3 DICK on Fury’s eyepatch in glittery gold, or transfigured Hawkeye’s bow into a thong, or told SHIELD agents barefaced lies like I have absolutely no idea what happened to Wanda’s powers, my, what a mystery and then proceeded to taunt the ex-Hydra agent with things like “I’m sure we’ll find them, right next to your intelligence”, or shrank the Captain America shield down to the size of a pill and swallowed it, telling a horrified and enraged Rogers that he’d have to wait a few days to get it back, because the precious shield was currently making its way through Loki’s bowels, Loki made Tony laugh. And Tony had spent so long crying and shouting and falling apart that he clung to the happiness the mischief-maker brought with both hands.Tony didn’t care about Loki’s past - he cared about his present, and even more about his future. Because Tony was starting to hope that Loki would be willing to share his future with him.Before Loki could smite Peter or turn him into a rat for assaulting his nose with icing, Tony leaned forwards and swiped his thumb over the god’s smooth skin. Loki’s gaze snapped to his, eyes going round as he realised what Tony had just done. Tony licked the icing off his finger, a cheeky grin unfolding on his lips, and then threw caution to the wind altogether and winked.He’d expected Loki to be as playful and naughty as always - to smirk like the devil and toss him a witty quip quick as a flash. Instead, Loki’s cheeks turned the most fascinating shade of pale pink, and Tony felt his own cheeks heat slightly in response.Oh.Rhodey sighed as if he was oh so long suffering and his life was filled only with woe. Peter gaped. The bots twittered amongst themselves excitedly and JARVIS silently saved several recordings to his hard drive. And then made copies, just in case.Karen hoped to God she had a few more years of peaceful mercy before Peter turned as mushy and braindead as Tony apparently had.After all, how was anyone going to get any work done when they were all just staring at each other and drooling?At least Rhodey still seemed to have an IQ higher than 10.“Um...” Tony said intelligently.“That Cluedo is sounding really great right about now,” Rhodey told Peter sarcastically, but the adorkable teenager took him seriously and beamed.“Yes!” he exclaimed, grabbing his school bag and pulling out the board game. The sight of the familiar rucksack made something in Tony’s brain wiggle, and after a few moments of squinting he remembered.“Hey, wait, isn’t today Thursday?” - it said a lot about Tony’s life that he legitimately had to check that - “Shouldn’t you be at school?”Tony, apparently capable of acting like a ~responsible adult~ and holy shit kind of like a father figure but not really though but holy crap kind of he was not ready every once in a while, pinned Peter with a suspicious look.Peter’s mouth opened and shut silently.“Oh, but Stark, didn’t you know?” Loki asked with a sly grin and bright eyes that made Tony want to kiss him. “Your young protégé has a most unfortunate case of a stomach bug and is utterly incapable of attending school today. Really, it’s quite dreadful.”Tony raised an eyebrow at a very-guilty-looking Peter.“You said you wouldn’t tell,” he groaned at Loki, flopping back onto the bed and accepting his defeat.Loki sniffed disdainfully and looked pointedly at Peter’s half-eaten cake.“It was an accident!” Peter blushed and covered his face with his hands.“Does your aunt know you’re here?” Tony asked suspiciously.“Uhhhh.... yes?”Every single one of Tony’s Parent Senses tingled.“Is that so. So you won’t mind if I just call her-”“Wait! No! I mean... ahem, yes, go ahead, sure, no problem Mr Stark...”“Peter you are the worst liar I have ever seen, and I’m including Dummy in that list.”Peter winced. “That’s technically a good thing.”“You’re technically grounded.”“What!?!”“Just kidding - but seriously, tell your aunt where you are before she finds out and kills me with her rolling pin.”Peter groaned but obeyed.Tony settled back against his pillows, ignoring Rhodey’s amused gaze, because hell no he was not thinking about feelings right now, or really ever, and nibbled on a piece of cake, a smile blossoming on his lips.Yeah, Tony had woken up alone this morning. But now he was surrounded by the people he loved, and his heart sang with the knowledge that he didn’t have to be truly alone ever again..~* .~* .~*Tony’s birthday ended with an extremely competitive game of Cluedo which Loki won (Rhodey swore that the God of Lies had cheated somehow; Loki smirked and didn’t deny it). Loki and Rhodey retired to their bedrooms in the Tower (Tony could still remember the shock on Loki’s face when Tony casually gave him his own personalised room) and Peter was driven home by Happy, hopped up on a sugar high and chattering excitedly to the outwardly disgruntled but secretly fond bodyguard.The bots had enthusiastically taken on the role of cleaning up the Tower (Dummy had exploded more party poppers in a fit of jubilation), supervised by Karen via Itsy Bitsy, and VERONICA had appeared in one of the Iron Legionnaires to wish Tony a happy birthday and made him just a little teary. Afterwards, she’d returned the Legionnaire to its post in the upper atmosphere, constantly monitoring the surface of the Earth for threats.Tony hadn’t heard from Pepper, or Steve, or any of the other Avengers... but for the first time, that was okay. Everyone had been hurt by what had happened, but now it was time to move on.Tony crawled into bed, quietly humming and smiling to himself, and was surprised when JARVIS spoke up.“Sir?”“Yeah, J? Everything okay?”“Yes, Sir, everything is within acceptable parameters. However, if I may...”“Yeah? What is it?”It was highly unusual for JARVIS to act so hesitant and unsure around Tony, and it made him both curious and worried. Day by day the AI became increasingly human and his range of emotions widened and deepened, and it was both incredible to witness and alarming to experience. Tony loved that his digital friend, his son was capable of feeling happiness and amusement and perhaps even love - but he hated that his AI could also now experience fear and hatred and hurt. More and more frequently, Tony found himself wishing that he could protect his most treasured creation, just like a parent trying to shelter their child, but he knew it was impossible. That didn’t stop him from worrying.“J?”“Well, Sir...” JARVIS paused again, just for a moment, and then seemed to decide that he might as well just rip off the bandaid, because he spoke in a rush. “Do you remember several months ago, when you asked me what the point of it all was?”Tony frowned for a moment, confused, and then he realised what JARVIS was referencing and his heart sank.Just over a year ago, he’d been at one of the lowest points of his life. Pepper had broken up with him, the Avengers had chosen Wanda over him and Bruce, Ultron had nearly killed JARVIS and succeeded in killing a lot of innocent people, he’d found out his parents had been murdered, realised he’d hated his dad for years for something that wasn’t his fault, Steve had slammed the shield into his chest, shattered his rib cage and broken his heart...Tony didn’t really have a whole lot left to lose - or it felt like that, anyway - and he’d fallen back into his destructive habits just like he always did. He blamed himself for everything, and everyone else blamed him for everything, and one night it had all just become too much.Quickly on his way to being drunk out of his mind, Tony had ranted and roared at JARVIS in a horrifying display of despair, disgust and self loathing. He’d cursed Steve’s name, wished a bloody death upon Wanda and then broken down in tears and wondered aloud if maybe he deserved it all, because as much as he shouted and screamed about how everyone else was a monster... wasn’t he one too? Didn’t he have hundreds, thousands, maybe even millions of deaths on his hands?
”JARVIS, I’m just so... so tired,” Tony mumbled, lying on the middle of his living room floor, empty glass clutched in one hand. He could still feel the scotch burning his throat. Or maybe that was the tears.
“May I recommend that you retire for the evening, Sir. I feel it would be wise for you to go to bed and benefit from a good night’s sleep.”
“Not that kind of tired,” Tony whispered, closing his eyes as more tears trickled down his cheeks.
“Sir?”
“What’s the point of it all, J?” Tony asked in a voice too quiet, too despairing, for anyone to ever suspect that it was his. He sounded like a stranger; this mess of broken pieces lying on the floor, slowly soaking their skin with tears and scotch and regret. No, no one would ever suspect that this disaster of a man was Tony Goddamn Stark, because Tony Goddamn Stark didn’t fall apart like this. Iron Man didn’t fall apart like this. That was the whole fucking point. He was supposed to be stronger than this.
But he wasn’t.
He wasn’t, and god, he was tired.
“I just don’t understand,” Tony continued weakly, staring up at the blank ceiling and seeing the faces of everyone he’d loved, everyone who had betrayed him and hurt him and abandoned him, “I... I thought... I thought it was real.”
“This is real, Sir,” JARVIS said, attempting to reassure his creator but unable to understand the cause of his distress.
“I wish it wasn’t,” Tony muttered, closing his eyes. “I wish this was a nightmare. Because I could wake up, and it wouldn’t hurt so much.”
“If you are in pain, there are painkillers in the kitchen, although they may be ineffective when mixed with alcohol. My scans indicate you have not acquired any recent injuries. Is this pain from a past injury? If you are experiencing chest pain, I would recommend contacting your doctor-”
“It’s fine, J,” Tony sighed, laying one hand over his mangled chest, now riddled with even more scars. Scars from Afghanistan, scars from the arc reactor, and now scars from the man he had called his friend...
For a long time Tony said nothing. And then:
“I just don’t understand why they left me,” Tony confessed quietly, his voice wobbling, “why everyone always leaves me. Mom and Jarvis and Ana and Pepper and Bruce and... the Avengers... I really thought we were gonna be a family. Can you believe that? How stupid I was? I really thought they could love me.”
“That does not seem stupid, Sir. Humans are social animals and naturally want to find a group to belong to.”
Tony didn’t say it. He didn’t have to. JARVIS already knew.
He’d wanted to belong to the Avengers.
“Maybe there’s just something wrong with me,” Tony speculated flatly, rubbing absently at the metal edges of the arc reactor. “I mean, just look at me. I’m a mess.”
Apparently, JARVIS had figured out that this was not a physical problem, but a mental one - and that always worried the AI.
“Sir... would you like me to contact Colonel Rhodes?”
“No,” Tony sighed, opening his eyes and gazing at the empty glass in his right hand, “I don’t want him to see me like this. I don’t want to see anyone.”
“Understood, Sir.”
Nothing, and then:
“Am I a bad person, J?” Tony whispered, scared to hear the answer. He kept talking, drunkenly rambling, hoping to delay JARVIS’ response for just a couple seconds more. “I’ve killed so many people and hurt even more and not even Pepper could put up with me forever and just look at Rogers, isn’t he the literal embodiment of everything good in the world? Dad always said he was good and fair and just... and Rogers hates me, J. What does that even mean, when a good person hates you? Tries to kill you? Cause I’m pretty sure it’s bad.”
“You have also done many brave and admirable things, Sir,” JARVIS interjected.
“That doesn’t make me a good person.”
“Are you saying that a lifetime of good is overruled by one or two bad acts?”
“Yes,” Tony replied stubbornly.
“Then is it not possible that Mr Rogers is, in fact, not a good person either? While he may have lived a life of overall good, he has certainly done things that would be considered bad.”
“That’s different, J.”
“If it is different for Rogers, Sir, why is it not different for you?”
Tony sighed. His AI was too damn clever.
Instead of answering the AI’s question - because frankly he didn’t have an answer - Tony dodged it altogether and returned to his depressing line of speculation.
“I don’t even know who I am anymore,” Tony stated sullenly. And then, in true drunk-as-hell-and-miserable-as-shit fashion, he lamented, “I’m broken, amn’t I? That’s why no one can love me. I’m in little broken pieces and I’ve ruined everything and I don’t even know what the little pieces make any more.”
JARVIS didn’t have a response for that.
Silence. For such a long, horrible time, Tony had nothing but silence.
“I don’t think the pieces make anything.”
“Oh, god, please, just forget about that, JARVIS,” Tony said quickly, embarrassment, shame and regret filling his stomach. Guilt swamped him as he remembered all of the awful things he had said in moments of self pity and self hatred. “Just ignore all that shit. I was drunk off my ass.”“You said that you didn’t think the pieces of you made anything, Sir. That you didn’t know what they were anymore.”Tony groaned and rubbed his face with his hands. “Yeah, I know, J. I was talking crap, okay? I mean, what kind of depressing shit even is that? Since when did I talk like a depressed poet? If I ever start spouting crap like that again, you have permission to shoot me.”JARVIS was quiet for a couple of seconds before he spoke.“Did you mean it, Sir?”Tony froze. “What?”“Did you mean what you said? About the broken pieces of you making nothing?”Tony’s chest tightened and his throat closed up. His hands shook, just slightly.“It doesn’t matter,” he said eventually. Tony wrapped his blanket around himself, feeling totally exposed, his mind drifting back to that awful night, and all the things that caused it. The betrayal, the heartache, the pain.The loneliness.Just when Tony was starting to feel overwhelmed by the downward spiral of his thoughts, JARVIS spoke again.“Sir, from my understanding, it is tradition for people to give gifts to a person they care about on their birthday in order to make them feel happy and cared for.”“Yeah?”“I care about you, Sir.”“Thanks, JARVIS,” Tony smiled softly.“I wanted to give you a gift.”“Wait, what? No, it’s okay, you don’t have to worry about that. Just having you with me every day is all I need, buddy.”“You may not need it, Sir, but I believe that this is important nonetheless.”“Wait, wait, wait, did you actually get me something? For real?”“Yes, Sir.”“Holy crap!” Tony exclaimed. His AIs had never gotten him an actual gift before. Was this JARVIS taking one step closer to becoming human?Curiosity, pride and excitement fluttered through Tony, banishing his bad mood. “Okay, hit me with it, Jarvis!”Tony had expected some new tools, or a suit, or flashy sunglasses, or an expensive watch, or maybe even something snarky like a guide on “How to Get Fit and Lose Weight” or a healthy eating cookbook. Or maybe something simple, like a card and a box of chocolates - after all, it’s not like JARVIS had many references to go off of. Tony wasn’t exactly the best role model; the poor AI had probably been reduced to scouring the internet for gift ideas.Whatever Tony had been expecting, it certainly hadn’t been... this.The lights in the bedroom dimmed and then went out completely, and Tony felt his eyebrows raise in surprise. He almost expected one of his suits to come bursting through the door or out of a cupboard, shouting ‘SURPRISE!’ in JARVIS’ mechanical voice. Despite knowing that he probably shouldn’t get his hopes up (it was the AI’s first ever attempt at gift giving, after all), Tony felt anticipation and excitement zip through him. He sat up straight in his bed, legs folded and arms tensed in excitement.A quiet whirring noise filled the room, unmistakably the sound of mechanical movement, and Tony’s curiosity intensified. He forced himself to wait patiently as JARVIS presumably used one of his suits to move something around in the dark. The wait would be worth it, after all.Tony only had to sit still, grinning widely for a couple of seconds longer, and then the room suddenly lit with a soft, blue light - the exact colour of the light that flowed from the centre of Tony’s chest. Tony looked down, and his eyes were instantly drawn to a small device sitting in the middle of his bed. It was shaped like an arc reactor, glowing a steady blue, but there were subtle differences that told Tony that this wasn’t a reactor. It didn’t hum, for a start, and it was slightly too large. There were also changes to the overall shape and design, with metal additions that Tony didn’t understand. However, it would certainly have passed for a reactor if attached to the chest of one of his Iron Man suits.“It looks beautiful, J. What is it? ...Is it a nightlight?”Tony thought back to the many sleepless nights he had suffered through, sweating and screaming and crying as JARVIS’ soft voice coaxed him back to consciousness, gently reminding him of the date and time, reassuring him that he was safe. The thought of JARVIS making a nightlight to try and keep Tony’s fears at bay made the mechanic want to curl up and weep. He felt truly touched, his heart warming at the compassion that had gone into such a thoughtful gift. He didn’t deserve such a kind and loyal friend.Before Tony could thank his AI for the nightlight, JARVIS spoke again.“It can function as a nightlight if desired, Sir, but that is not all. Rather... I wished to... show you all the pieces of you.”“What?”Tony’s confusion stuttered to a halt when the arc reactor nightlight suddenly flared, because it wasn’t a nightlight, it was a 3D projector. The room was suddenly filled with hundreds of images, tiny, colourful people moving silently around Tony. A small image of Peter hovered in the air before Tony, his entire face beaming, waving his arms around enthusiastically. Tony couldn’t help the fond, amused smile that quirked his lips as be reached out to the miniature figure. When his fingers brushed the air where the projected Peter hovered, Peter’s soft laugh suddenly echoed quietly through the room. Tony startled, then repeated the gesture, reaching out to touch the replication of Peter. Again, the sound repeated, a joyful laugh that sounded like home.Tony’s entire body slackened with shock. He gazed around, his eyes flickering from moment to moment, realising that he was staring at hundreds of his best memories; little snippets of happiness and comfort and family. His eyes welled with tears as he spotted Rhodey, Maria, Jarvis, Ana, Happy, Harley, Dummy, U, Butterfingers and even a small, repeating clip of Bruce smiling shyly and hiding behind his lab coat and glasses. Pepper was there, too: the first time they’d ever danced together. The memory was bittersweet, but precious nonetheless.There was Peter flipping pancakes and accidentally landing one on Dummy; Rhodey raising one eyebrow with a deadpan expression but amusement glittering in his warm eyes; Maria posing with a five year old Tony for a photograph, radiant in a summer dress; Ana showing Tony how to ice cupcakes; Happy, blushing as he was officially promoted to Head of Security for Stark Industries and trying to hide how much it meant to him; Jarvis, standing proud beside Tony the day he got accepted into MIT, grinning like he’d just won the world; Harley, fast asleep on the sofa, drooling on Peter’s shoulder and clutching his potato gun. With shaking hands, Tony pressed one image and then another, overcome with emotion, and as his eyes blurred he ran his hand through hundreds of his most precious moments, lighting them all up like stars. The sounds swelled and sang together like music, burning bright in the darkness of Tony’s room.
”Mr Stark! Mr Stark! Guess what! I got 100% in my Chemistry test!”
“Who hurt you? I’ll shoot them.” “With a potato?” “With revenge.”
“It’s good to have you back, Tones.”
Maria, playing the piano while her young son hummed along.
“Hey, J, watch my back, will you?” “Always, Sir.”
“Wait, if you’re my bodyguard, does that mean you’re Kevin and I’m Whitney!?” “Nope, it means I’m awesome and you’re poor. Now get in the car.”
“This is your Friendly Neighbourhood Spider-Man, just checking in for today. Not much happened, but I did see this really cute dog...”
“Will that be all, Mr Stark?” “That will be all, Ms Potts.”
“You’re my mechanic. We’re connected.”
Dummy, beeping and whirring in a language only Tony understood. Dummy didn’t need words to tell his creator he loved him.
“Hey, Tony, do you think this compound would work better if we phosphorylated it?” “Green bean! You’re a genius!”
“If you call me honey bunny in front of anyone from the military, I’m going to castrate you.” “Sure thing, sweet cheeks!”
“I got you a burger and fries, Boss.” “Oh my god, marry me!” “No can do, Boss, I’m out of your league.”
The Star Wars theme tune as everyone curled up on the sofa for family movie night.
“We’re your family. Don’t you ever forget it.”
“Hey, Mr Stark? Um, I just wanted to, um... well, I wanted to say thank you. For everything.”
“I admit that it took me a while to understand the meaning behind your words, Sir. But I like to think that I understand them now, and I wanted to show you that while you may not have seen any value in them, I believe that all the pieces of you, even if broken, do still make something, and it is, by all definitions, beautiful.”For the first time in his life, Tony Stark was truly speechless.“So I wished to merely give you a birthday gift that would bring you happiness and show that you are cared for, as is tradition.... Sir? Is everything all right?”Tony swiped at his wet cheeks, struggling to control his uneven breathing. “Yeah, it’s all good, buddy. I just... didn’t expect this.”“Were my calculations incorrect? I did not expect this to cause you any distress-”“No, no, I’m not distressed. I’m... I’m really happy, J. Just really happy. I promise.”Tony sat up shakily and wiped away the last of the moisture from his cheeks. The salty tears had somehow washed away years of pain, and now there was a clean slate ready to take their place. A fresh start. One filled with hope and warmth and light.Tony carefully picked up JARVIS’ gift, cradling it delicately in his hands. The projector, shaped like an arc reactor, like his heart, shone brightly in his palms, and it felt like holding love.Love for his friends, his family, and maybe even himself.“JARVIS... you know that I love you, right?”“And I you. Always, Sir.”And finally, all the pieces fell into place.