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It's...weird. I'm excited to get out of the city, to see the world beyond the walls of Insomnia. To see Altissia. To see Luna. As if that isn't complicated. Five days ago I was just running around with Prom trying not to think about one day having to succeed my father on the throne. Now I'm in car headed to my own wedding. It doesn't seem real. Like being king, it's too big, too much. It's almost nonsensical. I'm going, but... Then what? I am reminded that I don't know what I'm doing. That I'm wasting time I could spend learning how to be king, how to be the prince people seem to think I should be. That failure is unthinkable and somehow I'm supposed to be this chosen savior or some shit. Whenever I start to think about the future I am supposed to have I can't help but feel like I don't measure up. That I'm some imposter prince and literally anyone else would do a better job than I ever could. And then I remember Luna telling me I was chosen and that she believed I would succeed and I want to be that person for her. But how can I be that person when I am like this? It's complicated and all I really want- "Earth to Noctis!" Prompto's voice is accompanied by Gladio’s hand waiving in front of my face. "You okay buddy? You seemed kinda far away for a bit." His voice is light, but he’s peering at me in the rear view mirror and I know that look in his eyes. He's concerned. "Yeah, I'm ok." "You know, Noct, you could smile once in a while. I mean we finally get out of Insomnia and we’re going to Altissia to top it off!" I do smile, despite the confusing mess in my head. "What do you think it's like?" "I mean it looks super nice in photos,” he replies, “and there’s always so many stylish people." Not for the first time I wonder if he knows what he's doing-drawing me out of myself and back into the world around me. "We'll be the Prince's Official Escort," Ignis points out, and I can almost see the capital letters, "you'll wear your Crownsguard uniform with pride." "Awww, Come on! What if it's my only chance to impress a pretty girl? No one's going to want to talk to me in this boring black!" "I've never had a problem." Gladio has gone back to drowsing in the back seat with me, and only opens one eye to look at Prom. "I guess it wouldn’t hurt to do a little shopping,” I concede, mostly because getting married is a big deal and I want to put off thinking about it. Maybe that’s childish, but I don’t care. "Noct, you are the best!" Prom’s giddy joy is so straightforward and it’s easy to smile because of it. The snort from Gladio and his near-audible eye-roll help too. "But really, do you think Lady Lunafreya will like me?" "I dunno, are you going to chatter at her like a lunatic?" I lean forward to poke him in the arm. "Hey!" "You may need to take the time to study some etiquette. She is, after all Royalty." "So's Noct!" "I don't know that I'd call him royal." Gladio doesn't even open his eyes when he snorts this time. "Lady Lunafreya has impeccable manners, unlike Noctis. I only pray neither of you embarrass her when at last we arrive." It's not hard to ignore what Iggy's saying-I've been doing it for most of my life at this point. I'm pretty sure Luna is not as anal retentive as he thinks she is but it's just another reminder that I haven't seen her in twelve years. Without the notebook we wouldn't have been able to keep in touch at all. "Well," says Prompto, "I think she'll like us. She likes Noct okay, after all." No one speaks up to correct him, to point out that I haven't seen her in twelve years but somehow Iggy's silence speaks volumes. "And anyway, no one who likes dogs could be that bad." His confidence about Luna is weird but I'm short enough on hope for the future that it's kind of comforting. At least someone thinks I won’t screw this up. The truth is I’m having a hard time with everything. Getting married, being king, being the chosen one. I've got this destiny or whatever but if I start trying to imagine it I get to the part where I see Luna again and that's sort of where my brain stops. Like I don't think it's going to happen or that it can't possibly be real. It never occurred to me that marrying Luna would change my life until Ignis pointed it out-I never thought she'd come back to Insomnia with me or that I'd live with her in the Citadel. I don't remember my mom, or what my dad was like when he was with her. I wasn't there when they were together, and she died when I was too little. I never thought- I guess it doesn't really matter now. I'm being pushed forward by some force I don't understand into a destiny I can't really picture, let alone want. It's too much, too fast and not for the first time I wish it was happening to someone else. Except then it would be someone else in Luna's life and I don't like the thought of that either. Which is ridiculous because I don't even know how she feels about all of this or if she's doing it because she's the Oracle and it's what the people want. Am I really the Chosen one? The King of Light the prophesies talk about? I dont know. She seemed so sure when I was a kid, and I'll admit I'd probably have done just about anything for her. I don't really understand my relationship with Luna. We're friends, sort of. She talked like we were going to be partners in this destiny she believed I had and I promised her I wouldn't let her down but I don't know if I'm really the chosen one at all. Can I be the hero she believed I would be? Am I strong enough to save everyone? To save her? What if I'm not? My thoughts are-mercifully-interrupted. Less welcome is the very sudden clanking sound the Regalia is making as we clear the final gates, a couple miles past the last service station. Prompto slows down, pulling over as the car sputters to death. "What's the matter?" Gladio is suddenly alert. "I'm not entirely certain," Ignis says as he gets out of the car, "but I fear it is not something I can repair." "Did I break the King's car? Please tell me I didn't break the King's car." "I hardly strongly doubt this is something you did," Ignis' tone is reasonable as he pops the hood. “I was watching you and you performed well.” Gladio joins him peering into the motor. I know nothing about cars, except that I like this one a lot. The world beyond Insomnia isn’t what I expected. Past the wall, across the bridges, we enter a world that looks…empty. Crossing the blockade into Duscae and there’s no people. Looking at the map on the way it really seemed like Hammerhead was just next door. Pushing the car from the blockade made it suddenly very real that the world was bigger than I knew. And it seems empty. There isn’t anyone for miles. Just us and the car. And the pushing. “I’m not sure if us breaking the car on the first day is a good omen or not.” “Well you’re never driving again.” “Hey, I didn’t DO anything.” “Right.” “I believe that is the sign we are looking for.” Ignis’ voice cuts off any further protests from Prompto. “Finally. Are you guys even pushing?” Gladio grunts.