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---------------------------------It was hard to believe such an honored group could shatter and become as disjointed as it had, leaving those left behind to wonder if such a thing existed in the first place. The two that came to mind after The Dirty Dawgz unfortunate end were certainly the ones who took a massive turn in their lives. Ramuda, the no mercy man who was more than happy to let people know how he really thought about them, took on a new bubbly attitude- masking that once horrifyingly cold disdain he held for others. Jakurai on the other hand? The once stoic doctor seemed to take on a new life’s mission of repaying for his old ways and set off to heal those in need rather than harm. Of course, the cat and mouse fight between the both of them never ended and as time went on; it only seemed to fuel the dislike more. Even as their new lives took them further apart from the past, somehow the two always got wrapped back together.Whether they wanted it or not. Despite all of this, the doctor couldn’t help but worry about his old group member. He’d seen first hand just how Ramuda’s ways could land him into serious danger. In his age, even though he could lie on and on about how much the pink-haired menace got under his skin, he was still concerned about his wellbeing. After all, the man had also been his teacher who got him roped into this strange world of Hypnosis Mic battles. Whether he wished to admit it or not, he held an unwavering level of care and respect for Ramuda. No matter what the Shibuya leader did. With his own division to call his home, the bustling fashion central of Shibuya easily became Ramuda’s perfect playground. After recruiting two less than willing men into his posse, among other things, everything the man thought he ever wanted seemed to fall right into his hands. Who needed an old title when he was out here making a name for himself? That’s what he preferred to think, anyways. His job as a fashion designer was booming more than ever before and playing the cute boy all the girls fawned over brought him immense amounts of amusement. At a moment’s notice, should he wish to send out a mass message, Ramuda could easily have every onee-chan in the city at his beck and call. Something that had remained a familiar constant since those old days. That feeling of familiarity came with a heavy price though.Over time, things soon grew boring. The same outcome over and over and over again. As fun as it was, it really never kept his interest for long deep down. Both Gentaro and Dice knew this, even though they never dared pointing it out to their leader. As sweet as the pink-haired man looked, he still retained his rotten core from the past. Everyone who dared to take a bite still got a cavity in the end. A facade was the best way to describe him.“Hey hey, shouldn’t you live life to the fullest? Without any sort of regret?”The pop of the lollipop from Ramuda’s mouth echoed throughout the small studio. As if conditioned, his pawns stood at attention.“What’s the point of living life without a little bit of excitement? That old bastard—he gets on my nerves.” Back in Shinjuku with the past shoved as far back as it could go, Jakurai carried on his new life of serving those in need. Opening his own clinic was just one of many ways he planned to make atonement for his shrouded past. It was something he preferred to leave behind, even though remnants lingered all around. His old division colleague was one of the biggest reminders. To this day, he always wondered how that strange man figured out his past and how he even found him. With a personality as irritating as nails on a chalkboard, he wondered how he’d ever grown amused by such a two-faced person enough to let him become his teacher in this strange new world. Though with all things aside, those days were very much gone. Such teachings didn’t stick around, especially since Jakurai now used his skills to heal rather than attack. Violence was unnecessary for his goal in treating people. The clinic, in the end, became his purpose of living. His duty in life now was to serve those who needed his assistance. And in turn? He ended up forming his own division with two people he’d never expected to get along with. A businessman and a host from one of those ritzy clubs in Kabukicho… The doctor was in no place to speak about the strange circumstances of their meeting, yet he was ever grateful they agreed to join his side. Life since forming Matenrou carried on rather uneventfully, minus the occasional surprise visits from Doppo or Hifumi. Sometimes the doctor received a few interesting patients, but overall, he enjoyed his new days living in general peace. If he had to speak honestly, he thought it was almost too peaceful compared to those old days. Without yanking two fighting men from each other and shaking an overly clingy one off of his back, he didn’t know whether he missed it or celebrated the end of it all. His new division members had their own eccentric moments, but they never held a candle to the wild times that happened in The Dirty Dawgz. Still, no matter how much he tried to say the past was in the past, it was hard to resist thinking about Ramuda.His voice was beyond grating, his ideals in life were chaotic to said the least—not to mention things rather left unsaid about his own goals in the end, yet that ticking time bomb of a person intrigued the older man immensely. What made someone so sickenly sweet-looking hold such disdain for the world? What brought about such violence in his core? It was all so interesting, and even with their distance now set in stone, Jakurai couldn’t hold back his urge to pry. To save him before he destroyed himself.✧・゚: ✧“Ramuda-kun, do you really need to leave?” The whiny, yet hopeful voice rang out from the pile of sheets as the one mentioned shrugged his sweater back on. A one night fling, something he was rather used to at this point, somehow always turned into his onee-chans begging for him to at least stay overnight. He had no desire to stay longer than he needed, however. Turning to face the woman with a warm smile, a jubilant laugh escaped his kiss bruised lips as he cupped her cheek before replying,“I’m sorry, onee-chan! I need to get back to work but you know I’m always a phone-call away~”While it wasn’t the answer she was hoping to receive, she simply wished Ramuda well and thanked him for a fun night. In the end, it seemed almost all of his onee-chans wished for the same thing. They all hoped one day he’d settle down with one of them and stop playing this chaotic game of flings. Ramuda had no desire to ever stop. That ever-burning flame in his body continued to seek out more, even if it left scars in both himself and those he shared himself with. The rush that came with a new girl used to quell the impulse in the past, but now it felt like it only sated feelings for a short while. No matter how many people he hung out with…. No matter how many fights he got into, those same thoughts never went away. A single name stuck out in his mind throughout it all, leaving the Shibuya leader to wonder if he was losing his sanity.
Jakurai.
He could spout all he wanted about how much the doctor got under his skin and how his once tender words grew toxic but under it all, Ramuda felt a flicker of longing that he wanted to extinguish. He hated him! He hated him with such a passion that merely thinking of his tender touches in the past made his skin crawl in the most grueling way. What was once seen as Jakurai’s concern soon began to seem more like a god complex or a wish to normalize abnormalities.Alone, that cheery smile fell into a grimace as ash tumbled from his fingers to the bustling streets below his abode. With the fresh taste of nicotine and the air of the city suffocating his senses, Ramuda reflected back on the day that started their chaotic cogwheel.A day that was both sweet and sour.✧・゚: ✧
“Fine! Be that way, but don’t act so high and mighty when we all know you hold some dark secrets too! Stop preaching when you have a pile of stuff too, old man!”
Slam!
The door closed before anyone could get another word in, and all Jakurai could hear was the clanging of Ramuda’s childish stomps down the stairs. All he could do was rub at his temples, truly feeling his age in that moment. Things were getting tense for the once close-knit group known as The Dirty Dawgz. As the battles in the main city grew in popularity, so did the pressure to keep their reign across the divisions. In turn, the group’s own issues began to surface as inner conflict grew.
Ramuda, having connections that he’d rather not dive into, thought they could gain the upper hand if they all worked with his plan. Jakurai, however, immediately called out his reckless bluff, saying it wasn’t worth rushing in and breaking the rules only to keep their title strong. They’d get through this, the older of the group tried to reassure them all- at least, until the fashion designer stormed off in a flurry of curses and ill words.
Jakurai really was getting too old for this.
“Who does he think he is? He has blood on his hands, too—maybe even more than I do!”
A deep breath in….
Freshly manicured hands dug through his jean pockets, and with a quick flick of his decorated lighter, Ramuda leaned back against the metal railing of their building’s staircase and watched as the smoke distorted the flickering lights above him. He wanted the best for their found family, even if at times they were all at each other’s throats over various things. If rumors were true and there were plans to try and catch them off guard, he wanted to be one step ahead and show people to never mess with them.
What was so wrong with a little fun? Ramuda nearly threw his free arm in the air as he took a long drag of his cigarette, letting the burn settle deep in his throat before spilling it out with ease. Jakurai opposed of his idea with no hesitation, nearly calling him out of his mind for even suggesting such a dangerous thing. And yet, he’d done some violent things on his own. Where had that old, mutual commitment gone? Things were falling apart around them fast and yet even as the corners of his eyes stung with emotions, he was brought back to reality as his cigarette was suddenly pried from his fingers.
“Here as always. Have I not told you these are bad for you?”
Cerulean eyes widened at the sudden tenor and as he quickly tugged his hat down to cover his face, Ramuda swatted a hand towards the other’s direction before spitting out bitterly.
“What does it matter? It’s awfully rude to take something out of someone’s hand, Ja~ku~rai! I thought old men were taught to have better manners. Guess I was wrong!”
A response wasn’t warranted and with no sign of correcting Ramuda’s rudeness, Jakurai merely sat down beside him before holding a single lollipop out in front of his face. No words were needed when the two of them knew exactly what he was getting at. This feeling…. It was familiar, yet warm. Something the two of them had formed in recent times, as things between the group crumbled. He wasted no time in taking the sweet treat from Jakurai’s gloved hand and slipping it between his lips, mumbling nonsense over how the combo of sweet and smoke didn’t mesh all that well together. The bitter sensation lasting until the sting around his eyes got overshadowed from the warmth of the moment.
“Is that better?”
Ramuda simply pouted, curling into himself as he fiddled with the stick in between licks of the sweet concoction. As the street lights flickered nearby in the shadowy night, the cool wind struck a nerve inside the younger man as he scoffed and stared off in the distance. Signs were already there that the peace all four of them had known was going to be tested any day now. And yet… if things weren’t going to be exciting, familiar, but also new, Ramuda didn’t know if he wanted it anymore.
Jakurai was more than fine keeping things the way they were if it meant no more fatalities occurred by his hands. Samatoki and Ichiro? They were too confusing to understand with their similar yet conflicting views. But the fashion designer wasn’t going to just sit around and become a beaten-up loser to a bunch of low-life men against their agenda. If the group wasn’t going to listen, he’d just have to make his points impossible to ignore.
“You know, I meant what I said, Jakurai. We’re falling apart and people are catching onto it. If we’re not going to show people we’re the top dogs, they’ll eat us alive!”
Turning to face the other, the doctor contemplated his words even though everything in his gut told him Ramuda was just thinking irrationally yet again. How many times had he been stuck roping Ramuda in, before he went off and got himself hurt by these impulses? He couldn’t even begin to count. It always stemmed from that rush of power- the thrill of having the outcome go in his favor. But underhanded ways had consequences and Jakurai didn’t feel like having the government find out they were behind some outlawed activities. Even if his teacher was the one encouraging it. So with a shake of his head, Jakurai spoke back.
“Say what you want, Amemura-kun. Jumping into things won’t help us in the end and you know it. We’ll stay on top of it and- ..My arm, Amemura-kun.”
Just as the other was about to finish his sentence, the sound of candy hitting the stairs and a tight grip on his arm silenced the alley before a low giggle echoed. It was soft at first, only growing in dulcet tones, as the grip on Jakurai’s arm grew firmer out of desperation. He wasn’t going to win. He couldn’t win. Ramuda was right and to the untrained ear this was simply his way of showing he was done playing games. To Jakurai? He could hear the tears in his voice even if he never dared to show it.
“Alright, you win. But… if this isn’t eternal, I’d rather break it to pieces. A charade isn’t fun if the players don’t want to play along anymore.”
So that’s how he wanted to be. Well, a small smirk formed on the taller man’s lips at his game and with a hum, he simply leaned down to be face to face with the other. As the dark sky loomed above them, so did the silent promise of two men with prides much larger than their skin.
✧・゚: ✧“Surprise, surprise…. Guess who was right in the end.”Smothering the finished cigarette in the crystal ashtray left on his veranda, Ramuda watched as life continued on in the city below him. A city unaware of the two’s turmoil. ✧・゚: ✧ With life continuing on as normal as it could, it was no surprise it didn’t take long before tales of each other’s accomplishments reached their respective divisions. Talk of a strange yet alluring doctor assisting those in need no matter what their situation was, made waves across the ever trending streets of Shibuya. Honestly, to hear news about things in Shinjuku was not common, considering their distance. Jakurai was making quite the name for himself, even though anything positive involving the man, made Ramuda’s stomach twist in disgust. Also as expected, the same could be said about Jakurai encountering one of the many flashing screens in the city, as he was returning from what was supposed to be a nice lunch. All those glaring lights and electric colors instantly reminded him of the pastel gremlin. However, once, the taller man squinted his eyes at the large screen, realization hit him like a speeding truck.
“And now, we’re excited to announce Shibuya’s most trending designer has given us an exclusive sneak peek at his new Spring collection! This special trailer of the fashion show has all of us wondering—”
The woman’s voice faded off into the chatter of the streets before Jakurai could give it further thought. With news of Ramuda’s success with his fashion line, among his other whims,it inspired the doctor to investigate just how the other was doing. Curious about the other’s ever careless ways, he knew that he would have to see it for himself. And so, he here was, making a detour to visit a place that was all too familiar not so long ago. Just as the doctor decided on his impromptu visit, the fashion designer himself was milking the recent excitement of his latest success, out in the streets. Sipping on his iced drink, Ramuda hummed along to the theme of his commercial which was currently blasting across the famous crossing. He strolled along as if he didn’t have another care in the world. All of that hard work was finally coming to fruition and he couldn’t be more proud. Surely all of the pretty ladies would enjoy his new collection; maybe it could even sell out on day one! He certainly hoped so as he made his way across the pedestrian crossing and waved at anyone who called out his name, with a smile. The happy skip in his step unfortunately came to a halt when eyes caught glimpse of a flash of purple pass him. That couldn’t be- could it? There was no way he saw that correctly. Maybe Gentaro was right with pointing out his lack of sleep was going to cause some ill side effects. Jerking his head to face the source of what caught his attention, everything seemed to freeze as his eyes met with those all too familiar ones. It really was him.Jakurai seemed to have the same look of shock on his face as he turned to glance at that sudden blur of neon pink rushing past his side. Fate really seemed to be working on his side today, despite Ramuda’s look of surprise immediately morphing into disgust as he took in the sight of the taller man in his terf. Who gave the older man the right to waltz in his city and ruin his day? How annoying!“So the old doc has decided to show his face here, again. What a pleasure! You’re right on cue, Jakurai! I’m feeling awfully ill just looking at you.”The Shibuya leader scoffed, face twisting into an exaggerated scowl as the doctor resisted the urge to roll his eyes in return. The younger man really was the same as ever, it seemed. He didn’t know whether to call it overly dramatic or irritating. You’d think as he got older he’d learn to stop acting like a child. Though in many ways, maybe that was his charming point. “Still the same cocky attitude as always, Amemura-kun. Tell me, what are the odds of us running into each other like this?”If Jakurai was going to play oblivious, Ramuda wasn’t going to play nice. There was only one reason for the other to be prowling around Shibuya crossing and the realization of it pissed him off more than he could imagine. Here he was, thinking he could be slick and pass this off as a mere coincidence. Jakurai really was the worst.“Don’t go saying this was just chance, old man! Why are you here? Don’t tell me you’re a little lost wolf who couldn’t find his way home.”Manicured fingers tightened around the plastic cup and with a crunch, sweet-looking eyes soon grew dark.
“Or was it more that you’re out here looking to pry your nose where it doesn’t belong, huh?”
Unfazed by the sudden shift in tone, Jakurai stood his ground and without missing a beat, avoided falling right into his trap. Both of them knew exactly why he was here, yet there was nothing wrong with lying a little to lessen the truth. “I am doing nothing of the sort. As surprising as it might be for someone like you to comprehend, I am actually here for some errands. However, is it wrong for me to be concerned about my old teacher every once in a while?”Oh, now he was going to act respectful. What a joke.Ramuda wasn’t some child who needed to be fussed over by some man who had a god complex! He wasn’t broken. Yet no matter how much he asserted his independence, the doctor was never too far behind to reel him back in and point out his flaws. You’ll hurt yourself, he always chastised. Reckless, impulsive, unsafe- too many words that drove the younger mad. If he wanted to see reckless, he’d show him reckless. If Jakurai truly was so concerned, why didn’t he ever—A laugh.Louder and louder, the designer just couldn’t contain himself as he rubbed at his eyes over the irony of it all. This really was just another one of Jakurai’s ploys to give himself an ego boost for fixing his ways. Just like old times, the two of them seemed to clash over how he wished to live his life. If he couldn’t live in the now, with no regrets, what was the point of living in the first place? Without the thrill of putting his safety and comfort on the line, life would be far too boring. Perhaps that day left a few raw nerves neither of them wished to delve into, but instead of re-evaluating his actions, it only seemed to spur Ramuda on more for the excitement of skirting the edge of morality.“You make me laugh, Jakurai! You can’t fix something that wasn’t ever broken in the first place! Why don’t you own up that you also had a part in us breaking apart? If anything, you not listening to me caused the downfall!”
So why? Why do I want you to keep trying?
“Amemura-kun,”Jakurai narrowed his eyes at the childish display in front of him despite the air about them feeling as tense as it had back in those fond days. This wasn’t just Ramuda being his usual troublesome self. This was something far deeper. Perhaps the fashion designer had a point; he wasn’t free of sin himself. However, him refusing to go with a plan that was riddled with flaws had nothing to do with the group being unsalvageable. “You need to have more respect about yourself and those around you. Life isn’t so forgiving for long. A group couldn’t survive when one was so willing to throw everything in the fire for a quick rush. Think about that the next time you push aside someone who knows best.”
Why won’t you let me help you? Let me break that candy-coated barrier.
With neither of them coming to a mutual agreement with their pasts, the chance encounter ended exactly as expected. Both were far too fed up with each other’s insistence over who was in the right to continue and so, with Ramuda nearly tossing his drink at the ill-Doc as a parting gift, the two went their separate ways. If there was any time Ramuda was grateful his posse had taken the hint to leave, now was that moment as he stormed his way into the studio he called home. Almost as if a rusted chain had finally shattered from pressure, emotions the man had locked away had resurfaced in the most volatile manner. That unfamiliar sting burned in the corner of his eyes and with his throat constricting, hands grabbed at anything and everything to tear into. What did that doctor know?Who did he think he was, acting like some god meant to save him?With the room now in tatters, Ramuda’s gaze soon caught sight of a single picture frame laying amongst the scraps of fabric and piles of clothes. Ah, that was….—
Crash!
Pieces of glass shattered across his work desk as the picture frame made contact with the wall behind it. Within the sharp mess, a tattered photo of the past sat atop. “...I’ll break it to pieces. The past, and anything involving it.”The same couldn’t be said when it came to how Jakurai felt about what transpired. Sure, he was frustrated nothing came of it, but he hoped his words were enough to spark a change in his ways in due time. Ramuda had always held little regard about his wellbeing, even back in those days. If he could keep him and the others on their toes, he’d do it in a heartbeat. In a way, that careless air about him was endearing, even if they both disagreed at times. As interesting as it was to take Ramuda on as his biggest mission yet, there was an honest reason behind all of his concern. Even if he refused to admit it outloud. Pulling open the old, abandoned drawer in his work desk, gloved hands gently lifted out a dusty frame. The sight of the photo was enough to cause Jakurai to let out a sigh before he leaned back in his chair. To think there had been a time he and Ramuda enjoyed each other’s company…. Such a thing felt so ancient. The Dirty Dawgz fall out really had affected all of them in the end. Though one day stuck out in his mind no matter how much he tried to move on from it. His warning had become a reality and he was faced with a sight that was hard to stomach.On that day, Jakurai thought he’d never see that cheery smile again.✧・゚: ✧
The clinic Jakurai owned in Shinjuku was no stranger to odd and dire patients coming through its doors. With division battles on the rise, he and his staff were well acquainted with all sorts of injuries and how to keep illegal activities under lock and key. On this fateful day however, such a thing became far too personal. With the disbandment of The Dirty Dawgz, the doctor had taken more hours and settled back into his career to occupy his time. Without the need to babysit some rowdy men, he found sitting around idly was too much of a waste when people needed his services.
Normally, the clinic was rather quiet around this time of night. The city was sleeping and only those wishing to prowl the nightlife lingered about. However, outside his office, hushed voices began to grow louder and more frantic as time went on. No alarm had gone off indicating a critical patient, so why was there such a ruckus outside the halls? There were in-patients to take care of. Now wasn’t the time for playing around.
“We can’t tell him! Isn’t this that man who always waited for Sensei to leave with him? This is serious…”
Rising from his desk, Jakurai’s concern only grew as hushed words grew more and more coherent and once he shut the door behind himself, the two nurses whispering jolted back in surprise before lowering their heads in apology. It seemed the cat was out of the bag. Deep down they knew if anyone had the skills to treat a patient so badly harmed by a hypnosis mic, it was their head doctor. Even if it meant revealing something that would more than likely upset him.
“Forgive us, but we have an urgent patient in room 205… please visit him as soon as you can, Sensei.”
Nothing could have prepared the older man for the sight that awaited him as he stepped foot inside. He’d been forced to see countless tragedies at war, even some awful things in his past as an assassin, but nothing could prepare him for the image of Ramuda looking so small and fragile in a hospital bed. Outwardly, much didn’t look wrong outside of his nose and ears bleeding,on top of a bruised face. However, whatever had happened left the man out cold and unconscious. Even the sharpest prod couldn’t rouse him. Seeing Ramuda in this state sent his mind reeling. To someone who didn’t know what hypnosis mic attacks could do, they’d probably think the poor man was dead.
And so, it truly was a miracle that within a few hours under his care, the ex Dirty Dawgz member finally opened his eyes.
Expecting a grateful response wasn’t exactly on Jakurai’s list of expectations, but he was taken aback at how one moment Ramuda could look so peaceful, then the next start fussing under his hands.
“W..Where I am? Get your hands off of me, you creep! That bastard- I’ll get him for ganging up on me…… And you!"
Unfazed by it all, Jakurai simply continued his work wiping the dried blood from under his chin, only humming here and there before Ramuda’s curses finally struck a nerve.
“Ramuda- I mean, Amemura-kun. You’re in my clinic. Now stop thrashing about so I can tend to your wounds. You should consider yourself lucky you were able to handle getting hit like that with no lasting side-effects.”
Ah, that’s right. Ramuda had been busy unleashing his pent up frustrations before getting ganged up on. It was quite an honor to bring down an ex Dirty Dawgz member so he wasn’t surprised his little fit ended in disaster.
“Ok, ok! Fine. You did your job now leave me alone! I don’t want to look at your face!”
Ramuda jerked back away from Jakurai’s hand as soon as he saw the opportunity before rolling over onto his side, blanket pulled uncomfortably tight around his sore body. This doctor- he… he got on his nerves! Who gave him the right to be so concerned? Who gave him the right to still use his first name like those days? He wanted to be left alone!
Jakurai wouldn’t give him that luxury, sitting at his bedside for the remainder of his stay.
Ramuda, in the end, didn’t wish to be alone all along either.
✧・゚: ✧ Weeks passed by with little to no incident since the two’s chance encounter and Jakurai was beginning to wonder if that really meant the end of their connection. It really felt like the only times the two of them would see each other again would be on the battleground. Even though he had his own handful to deal with, he still couldn’t help but wonder if Ramuda’s ways had improved at all. With the rain outside showing no sign of stopping anytime soon, he hoped the weather had kept the man from going off and getting into trouble for the time being. That is, until a pounding knock on his door got the older man out of his thoughts. Who on earth would be bashing on his door in the pouring rain? Hifumi was more than likely asleep or doing chores after a long shift and Doppo was at work himself….. And as sad as it sounded, it wasn’t like Jakurai had many friends outside of them and those in his past. Before the stranger could bang on his door again, he rose to his feet and opened the door only to be met face-to-face with the man lingering in his thoughts all of this time.
Ramuda.
By the look of it, the poor thing was soaked to his core, not to mention scuffed up as if he’d just ran from a fight. Typical Ramuda, he assumed. He’d say things hadn’t changed but for him to come to his abode like this, something surely must be stirring. “You’re bleeding. Come in, I’ll fix you up.”For once, no emotion relayed back in Ramuda’s eyes as he followed behind, only sitting on the bed when Jakurai forcefully urged him to. No further words were exchanged between the two until the doctor got to work drying him off and tending to the scrapes across his body. Something about this felt all too familiar to both of them, though they didn’t dare speak up about it. In the past, the two had considered Jakurai’s place to be a fun hang out place. A place where two could come to unwind and bond over the silliest things, as well as patch themselves up after a battle. In a way, they missed this.“...I didn’t come here for pity, old man. This… all of this, is because you make me sick. You think you can fret over me, like I’ll break at any second.”Ramuda’s voice wavered as he finally looked up to meet Jakurai’s gaze. “I’m not something you can just fix.I can handle being in a fight and make decisions for myself! I want you to think about something other than your own ego for once!”Jakurai paid no mind to what he was saying, only focused on gently wiping each wound and keeping to his work. Ramuda could keep repeating things as much as he wanted but it wasn’t going to change the fact he had a duty to uphold. Simply leaving the other to rot away by his own hands was out of the question.“You may be able to put up a fight, yes. However, is it really worth it if you’re putting your happiness on the line for a quick rush? Are you really, truly happy living a life where nothing matters?”Fists curled into the fabric of Jakurai’s shirt and before the other could even get a word in, the pink-haired man’s body trembled in frustration. He didn’t get it! For someone who was a highly intelligent doctor, he really had his head shoved up in the clouds. What did he have to do to get the purpose of all of this across? Bash it into his head? Bring out his Hypnosis Mic and rap some sense into him?“You just don’t get it! No matter… how much I say I despise you…. No matter how much I try to prove I’m not a project that needs fixing…. You never listen to me!”Pulling back at the sudden raised voice, the doctor considered Ramuda’s words for a long while as the other looked as if a fire was igniting all around his being. Ahh…. this really was the flame he was attracted to. Like a moth, he couldn’t help but be captivated in a way that made him ever so curious to learn more. Even if pushing and prying could lead to his eventual downfall. Ramuda was like a diary full of secrets with the cover only showing a protective layer. These whims and impulses of his were a way to calm a need. A need both of them had refused to explore prior to their falling out.If Ramuda didn’t want him to be gentle, maybe he’d just need to stoop down to his level.A tender hand reached over to tuck a stray strand of pink behind the other’s ear before Jakurai leaned forward, letting the sound of rain act as a distraction for his raging thoughts as he allowed impulse to reign over his old habits.“I’d say the feeling is mutual, Amemura-kun. Though, we do have our own differences. My concern doesn’t come only from a place of self-gratification. However, if you need proof that I’m being genuine….”His voice trailed off as he leaned in even further, the two’s lips merely inches apart before continuing on.
“I’ll consider breaking a few things, too.”
Oh. Oh.Like a raging inferno, the Shibuya leader lunged forward to close the gap between them as he laughed from the hilarity of it all. Jakurai of all people, willing to dive off his dangerous cliff into uncharted territory? Well, this was going to be fun. Something that had been in the back of his mind was finally going to become reality despite the hatred on the surface. Lips crashed together in a clumsy display of passion as Ramuda wrapped his frame around the other, hoping to pull him into his web for as long as possible. The power Ramuda tried to have over Jakurai didn’t last long, both out of concern for getting burned and for his own desire to finally extinguish that flame for good. There was no more need to be searching for excitement, he wanted to say. He didn’t need to hang so dangerously off the cliff for a rush when he was here all along to sate him. More and more, he felt like the two of them were getting intoxicated by the heat between them. With Ramuda wasting no time in getting into what he wanted, Jakurai eventually pried his travelling hands away and shifted to pin the other below his frame. Hand in hand, eyes staring deeply into each other’s, the doctor hummed in amusement at the turn of events before smothering the roughness and replacing it with tender care.“You don’t need to leave burns in your wake anymore. Let go. Let us heal old scars and come to terms with ourselves.”
Aah..!
Screwing his eyes shut in response to the sensations, Ramuda’s body squirmed under Jakurai’s gentle and slow ministrations. He was meticulous as he was thorough- skillfully working his way to smother any lasting flame with his care. Never before did the younger man consider himself to get emotional during such acts and yet, here he was. With one of Jakurai’s hands tightening against his own, as well as their bodies forming to one, all he could do was gasp and struggle to form words to convey the thoughts swirling around in his mind.
Too much! Not enough…. Which really was it?
Tears trickled down his face as he was left raw and vulnerable, despite his head feeling more foggy than ever before. Jakurai seemed to take notice of this, slowing their pace down to almost nothing, preferring to tend to Ramuda’s other needs before continuing on. A kiss for each tear, brushing his damp bangs from his face, and yet such soft actions brought the other back to reflect on it all. Past, present, and even future. Maybe in the end, all of his actions were a result of a need he felt he couldn’t have. After the falling out, everything in his life felt like it didn’t matter. But now, he wanted to not only live in the now. He’d live for the future too.And soon, with a final whimper and groan, the flames that had caused so much pain ceased to flicker.✧・゚: ✧As soon as it seemed like the two men had fallen asleep, morning had arrived. The early sounds of birds chirping followed by the bustle of the city below roused the pink haired leader from his slumber and with an unamused groan, he forced himself up for the day. He couldn’t recall the last time he’d stayed over at a one night stand’s place, though calling Jakurai that was almost too rude even for him. His body ached in more ways than one but with one quick glance behind him, all thoughts of complaining seemed to melt away for the time being. Jakurai was out cold, hair sprawled out across the pillows in a rather amusing way. However, with early morning bliss also came an urge for reflection. So, after carefully wiggling his way out of the doctor’s death grip, Ramuda dove into one final act of impulse and turned to face the window with a fresh-lit cigarette. Taking it all in, he couldn’t believe such a thing happened. With their long-going cat and mouse game, he swore they’d both be at each other’s throats for the end of time. To not only finally break some of that tension to understand each other, but also get close in a way that rarely crossed his mind- it felt…. Nice. As much as he hated to admit Jakurai was ever right, maybe in this case, he was. His flings were only breaking him in the process. He needed that stable line to pull him back up when he tumbled down. “Ramuda… I thought I’ve told you how bad smoking was…”A sleepy tenor resounded in the once silent bedroom, catching the other slightly off-guard on top of suddenly hearing his first name for the first time in years. It had a nice familiarity to it...and he hoped it’d stick around.“Mm… perhaps, but sometimes the urge hits me, you know?”Well, the older man figured he couldn’t argue with that.Before Ramuda could do anymore damage though, slender fingers reached over and gently took the cigarette from his hands and as like in the past, procured a lollipop in its place. Where the man had such a sweet treat hidden within his house was anyone’s guess. Though, Ramuda almost hoped it was something he kept, clinging to the past such as he had as well. Letting out an airy chuckle at it all, Ramuda pushed himself back against Jakurai’s welcoming chest as he was wrapped about in a case of security. This was all so new and yet, welcomed with open arms. For now, despite them both knowing they’d still have their conflicting ways and stubborn egos, maybe there was finally a meaning in Ramuda’s life to live beyond just the now. A mixture of past, present, and future awaited them both as the morning sun enveloped them in the new day’s promise.
