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The day after James and Louis first kissed was a bit of a blur. Louis had promised Ruby to help with chores and maintenance and he kept his word but his mind was elsewhere the entire time. He didn't know how comfortable James would be with disclosing their relationship to the other kids just yet - considering he was still working on becoming accustomed to being around people at all, Louis didn't mind being patient and giving him a bit of time if he needed it. For that reason, he didn't tell Ruby that he couldn't stop thinking about him all day and that that was why he was even more clumsy and scatterbrained than usual.
To be honest, he wanted to keep what he was feeling between himself and James at the moment too. It felt... intimate, exciting, pure. He wanted to focus on those feelings right now and he didn't care what the others thought. His mind kept returning to the events of the night before - the look in James' deep brown eyes, the warmth of their bodies snuggling close to each other, the feeling of their soft lips pressed together... He had no idea what task he was even doing for Ruby, to be honest, and he couldn't force himself to care. All he wanted was to see James again, to see his smile, hear his voice and feel the overwhelming warmth and happiness that he made him feel again.
Unfortunately, James was nowhere to be found all day. Louis tried not to worry that he had run away or was avoiding him - he was sure that James must be with one of the other kids or someone would have told him he was missing. The other kids rarely left James alone, someone always wanted to talk to him or even to just sit with him, if they could sense that he was overwhelmed and needed a bit of quiet.
He couldn't deny that he began to feel nervous after a while. Left with time to think, he began agonizing over what he would say when he did see James again. Thankfully, shortly after sunset he found James sitting by the record player where they had been last night, listening to a record and looking at a piece of paper, smiling softly to himself.
Louis paused in the doorway for a moment, watching James before he realized that he had company. It made him so happy to see him smiling, especially alone. More than anything, he wanted James to be happy - he wanted him to be happy here, with the group. He couldn't help thinking about how beautiful the other boy was - inside and out. Louis snapped out of his train of thought after a moment, afraid that James would catch him staring. He felt familiar butterflies in his stomach as he approached the other boy, but the feeling of nervousness was soon overpowered by how happy he was to see him again.
James looked up at the sound of Louis' footsteps, and smiled widely when he saw the boy approaching him.
"I was wondering where you were. I hadn't seen you all day today." Louis sat down next to James, close enough that their shoulders brushed against each other. He looked at the paper James was holding and saw that it was a drawing of a dark haired boy and a young child holding hands with several walkers. "Is that a drawing of you and Tenn?"
"Yes," James smiled, his eyes bright and full of happiness. "Tenn drew it for me. He said it was supposed to be me and him and the walkers that we saw today. Isn't it cute?"
"It really is, I gotta say. What about the other one?" Louis asked, referring to the second piece of paper he could see peeking out behind the first.
James brought the second page out from behind the first to show it to Louis. The drawing on this page featured what looked like a walker standing on a podium wearing a crown, a small child by his side. A crowd of walkers surrounded them, but they looked like they were bowing to the walker with the crown.
"Is that supposed to be... the king of the walkers or something?"
James laughed softly, "No, it's supposed to be me - wearing my walker mask and a crown for some reason. Willy's standing next to me."
"Oh my God. Willy drew this?"
"He did. I told him I'm not any sort of king and that I don't control walkers, but he drew it anyway."
Louis couldn't help but laugh along with James. The drawing was so cute but so funny to him at the same time.
"He's a sweet kid, once you get to know him. He thinks very highly of you, as you can tell."
James placed the drawings down on top of the record player so he wouldn't forget to take them back to his room later. As much as it made him anxious to receive praise from the young kids - he was deeply touched that they had taken the time to draw pictures for him. It meant more to him than he could say.
"He is. They both are. They were with me for most of the day - we went outside for a bit."
"Really? How did that go? I mean, I'm not surprised that you were with Tenn but Willy can be a bit of a handful."
"It... I think it went pretty well?" A nervous tone had crept into James' voice. "Everyone made it back in one piece, anyway."
"Did you let him try on the walker mask yet?"
"Haha, very funny. No, but I told them that I might make them their own someday, if they learn how to distract walkers and how to be safe around them first. Someone like Willy, who gets so excited... I don't think he understands that the mask does nothing more than mask your scent. You still need to be quiet, strategic and careful. I want them to learn that first. I... I wouldn't want anything to happen to them because of me."
"That's really nice of you. I'm guessing they were up for it?"
"Yes, both of them were. Tenn is... surprisingly skilled already. He's such a quiet boy by nature and so smart... but I still worry about how young he is."
"Yeah, that's... probably wise of you. I think it's good to start teaching them though, if they want to learn. Willy didn't give you too much trouble?"
James looked away then, trying to keep a neutral expression. "He's... very... energetic..."
Louis laughed. "You can say that he's loud. I won't get upset."
"Okay, well... yeah. Thankfully, he's quiet around the walkers, but before and after - I've never seen a kid so excited since the old world. It's... remarkable, in its own way. It's nice to see... innocence and happiness like that..."
"It kind of freaks you out, doesn't it? How excited he gets," Louis grinned. He was becoming more comfortable teasing James over time - now that he knew for sure that he liked him, he felt the urge to tease him affectionately, hoping that he would respond well.
"W-what? No! It- That's not..." James stammered, instantly feeling flustered.
"It's okay, James. I can sense that you're nervous around him, but I think it's cute."
"I- I'm not - maybe anxious is a better word? I just - I don't know what to do when he's like that! I haven't... ever been around anyone like him before."
"He likes you, that's all. And he doesn't hold it back. I know it'll take some time but I think he'll grow on you. You're doing really well with the kids, you know. It's really sweet of you to make an effort with them. I'm assuming they don't give you much of a choice though, huh?" Louis laughed softly.
"...I guess you're right in Willy and Tenn's case. Clem keeps AJ occupied most of the time. I do... I really like the kids," James admitted. "Being around people is just... hard for me, even still."
"It's only been a few weeks, James. I know you might not feel this way but you are doing really well, just as you are. You don't need to change or do anything - you belong here, like I said."
James swallowed, taking a deep breath before speaking. "It's been so long that I - I can't remember what it was like, to belong. What it felt like." He felt vulnerable, admitting that to Louis, but he felt he could trust him.
Louis frowned sympathetically. "Can I tell you what I think it feels like?"
"You can."
"I think that belonging feels like... feeling safe, and wanted. Feeling like the others care about you and would be upset if you were gone. I can assure you that we all feel that way about you - look how much Tenn and Willy like you!"
James couldn't help but smile at that. "Yes, I guess so."
"Not to mention Clem, AJ, Ruby, Aasim, Omar... and me. After yesterday, I would hope that you know how important you are to me."
"O-oh, I-" James stuttered, much to his own frustration. It seemed to happen every time Louis assured him that someone cared about him - but he intended to keep doing it until James really believed it and really felt it. "I... y-you're important to me, too."
Louis beamed, a wave of pure elation overwhelming his senses. He knew how much of a big deal it was for someone as shy as James to open up like that. The record player started playing Frank Sinatra's "The Way You Look Tonight" and Louis stood up suddenly, gathering his courage to ask his companion a potentially nerve-wracking question.
"I have a proposition for you."
"Oh? What is it?" James instantly felt nervous, looking up at him from the floor.
"Dance with me?" Louis held out a slightly trembling hand that betrayed his nerves despite his show of confidence.
"Dance? You mean..." James instinctively took his hand despite his surprised expression.
"I'll show you," Louis assured him, pulling him up to his feet carefully.
He placed one of James' hands on his waist before sliding his own hand around the other boy's back, pulling them close. He intertwined the fingers of his other hand with James' and started swaying gently in time with the music.
"Isn't this how they dance in the movies? I know it's been 8 years but when you watch something dozens of times, they kind of get stuck in your head."
James chuckled softly. "Of course you did. I have no idea."
"Did you ever take any lessons as a kid?"
"No. I never had the chance. Did you?"
"I wanted to. Dancing, singing, piano - I wanted to take all of it. I never got to, but that won't stop me from doing it anyway."
Suddenly, Louis raised their clasped hands up over their heads, placed his hand on James' hip and gently applied pressure in the direction he was meant to turn. "This is where you turn around-"
"O-oh, like this?" James raised one foot off the ground and twirled on the spot on his other foot, until he was facing away from Louis and the other boy clasped their free hands together, pulling him close. His back was pressed against Louis' chest and suddenly they were both laughing happily.
"You told me you never took lessons!" Louis exclaimed in a teasing tone.
"I didn't!" James grinned. He was enjoying himself so much that his anxieties were forgotten and he didn't mind playing along with the teasing.
"Are you trying to show me up?" Louis released one set of their clasped hands and James spun outwards carefully until they were an arm's length away from each other. He then returned to their starting position, one hand around his waist and the other hand clasped with his partner's.
"I wouldn't dream of it. You're the showman, the pianist and the singer, remember?"
"Well, in my mind, maybe. Others might disagree with that."
"Well, they would be wrong," James smiled brightly at his companion.
Louis was at a loss for words. He couldn't believe that James was flirting with him, teasing him, complimenting him. He had never seen him so happy and comfortable. Before he could think of a response, James leaned over and pressed a kiss to his cheek. When he pulled back, his cheeks were flushed.
The gesture was so unexpected to Louis that suddenly he was the one that was flustered and stammering. "O-oh, that's, you - I - I liked that..."
James threw his arms around Louis' neck, pulling him into a close embrace as they continued to slowly sway around the room.
"I'm glad that you're... feeling more comfortable. I feel like I'm getting to see more and more of your personality shining through each day - and I like you more and more each time. And I already liked you a lot to begin with, might I add."
"You're... so kind, Louis."
"I don't have much of a choice. If I wasn't kind to you I think the others would take a vote and kick me out of the school. No way they'd let that happen."
The sentiment behind the joke struck a chord with James, and suddenly it all began to sink in - the fact that the others liked him and cared about him, that everyone wanted him to stay. He was touched - so much that he felt tears stinging his eyes.
Overwhelmed with feelings of joy, affection, and for the first time, belonging - James began to laugh softly, finding it hard to stop once he started. There was something about Louis that made him so incredibly happy. He was like a pure light in human form, always making the best of every situation. He was like memories of the old world, come alive again. Somehow he had managed to make it all these years without losing his playful spirit. It absolutely amazed him. Being with Louis felt like... being in a world without walkers, without trauma, without death and violence and tragedy. A world where James was... accepted and wanted. Where he was allowed to be himself, to express his beliefs and his feelings, to behave however he liked. Being with him felt like freedom and peace and happiness.
Louis noticed the tears in his eyes and wiped them away gently, looking concerned.
"I'm just not... used to feeling this much happiness," James explained. "It's overwhelming, that's all. Good tears."
"You deserve it," Louis assured him. "You know... we could do this every day, if you wanted. It doesn't have to be a special occasion."
"Maybe we should. As long as I get to be with you, I'm sure I would be happy."
Their eyes met briefly and both boys were positively beaming. A moment later, the record player started playing Frank Sinatra's "Strangers In The Night" and they embraced each other tightly, neither person wanting to let go. Instead, they began swaying slowly across the room, slow dancing like neither of them had ever done before.
"This... this kind of dancing is cool too, right?" Louis' hopeful tone was enough to make James smile again.
"Yes, of course it is."
The boys lost track of time as they held each other close, caught up in the intimacy and tenderness of the dance. Louis wouldn't have thought that he would be good at romance but if he managed to get a gorgeous boy to slow dance with him, he thought he must be doing alright. The music, the closeness and the tenderness all brought an overwhelming amount of romantic feelings to the surface. It almost didn't seem real, like it was something from a dream or a memory from the old world... but it was really happening.
After many songs had gone by, James finally managed to will himself to pull back from the embrace, leading Louis over to sit on the piano bench with him. He felt an urge to tell Louis how much he meant to him and he decided to let himself speak from his heart, without holding back.
"You know, Louis... I should have told you a while ago that I think you - you're a good person. You manage to find humour, meaning, connection, enjoyment - anywhere that you can, even in a world like this. In ways that no one else ever could. You find happiness all around you, where others can't see it and you just... create it, like magic."
Louis leaned forward suddenly, capturing James' lips with his. When words failed him, he expressed how he felt with actions - this was something that James was already beginning to learn about him. James' body instinctively tensed up in surprise, but a second later he was able to relax into the kiss. There was a sense of urgency and tenderness in the kiss that James hadn't felt before. He could tell that Louis was trying to convey his emotions to him, the affection he had for him. After a moment he felt the other boy parting his lips to deepen the kiss and responded in turn. Their tongues gently brushed against each other, tentatively at first, and then passionately as they kissed over and over. James could feel the adrenaline coursing through his veins; every nerve in his body felt like it was alive and on fire.
When they parted, breathing hard, James lowered his head to rest on the other boy's shoulder and the faint sound of a fast heartbeat filled his ears. At first he wasn't sure whether it was his own or Louis', as he could feel his own heart pounding at a similar pace. After a moment he noticed that he could only hear the sound from the ear he had pressed against Louis' shoulder, so he realized that it must belong to the other boy. Pure awe and wonder struck him suddenly. It had been so long since James had been close enough to someone to hear another person's heartbeat - the feeling of intimacy that it brought left him speechless. To think that Louis trusted him enough to let him this close... To think that they had formed such a genuine connection and a strong bond despite everything... made James so happy that he didn't know what to do with himself.
They had only been close for a short time, but he already felt much more comfortable and less nervous than he had in the beginning. Am I... falling in love with him? Surprisingly, the thought didn't bring fear or anxiety to the surface as James had expected. If I am, I'm going to let it happen, he decided.
Louis deserves to be happy, he thought. He didn't know if he could believe the same for himself, but if making Louis happy involved being in love with him and being happy himself... he would gladly accept that.
"Shall we head off to bed, maybe?" Louis asked. "You've had a long day with the kids, after all."
"I guess we should, shouldn't we?"
"Would you... like to stay in my room? I... I liked sharing a room with you last time."
"Yeah, I'd like that."
James stood up slowly, picking up the kids' artwork to take back with him. Louis followed his lead, quickly intertwining their fingers and holding his hand. They looked into each other's eyes for a moment, their lovestruck expressions communicating their emotions for them. They started walking back to the room together, hands clasped tightly the whole time, each boy feeling overwhelming warmth and happiness. They both felt a connection to each other that was so strong, there was no need for words.