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English
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Published:
2019-03-21
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1334
Chapters:
2/2

I love you without

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Funny how love caught you in a very unexpected moment. Usually, people in books or movies would fall in love from a smile, a gentle sympathetic gesture, a protective action, or simply just by looking at their beloved’s eyes and they instantly knew. They knew they’re made for each other. But Wonwoo was not that lucky. He didn’t have similar romantic experience when he finally realized his love for his best friend which he could share later with colleagues at a party or their bemused children, waiting patiently for their father to finish his story of how he met their mother on the couch. Because, the initial moment he realized he already had his heart stolen by Soonyoung was on their 9th grade, when he playfully put the biggest slice of kimbap in humanity there into Soonyoung’s mouth. The latter bit in a very big bite, along with a satisfied groan. His eyes shut, nose scrunched, cheeks puffed up further more. Teeth shown in display for the world to see. He’s more like a wild animal being fed rather than a human. Certainly not the kind of face people would fall in love with. But Wonwoo did. He fell hard. He himself was as startled as you, at least at first. Yet, loving Soonyoung was easy. Like breathing. It came casually to him. Wonwoo walked with Soonyoung to and from school, every morning and every evening. They laughed together. Had fun together. Talked and hugged a lot. Almost nothing was a secret between them. Wonwoo knew how Soonyoung silently cried when he didn’t win that dance competition he had bet everything on. Soonyoung knew how Wonwoo was burdened by everybody’s expectation on him. In sadness and in fear, they were aware of how small their existence was in this world. And they held onto each other in every single step taken, moving forward together. So, in one fine day, spring had come and the flowers blossomed beautifully on top of their heads, on the way to their school, Wonwoo smiled at Soonyoung. “Soonyoung-ah,” his tone was casual. “I like you.” At that very moment, the warm wind blew, carrying flower petals floating around them, around Soonyoung. His face as rosy as the cherry blossoms. “Will you go out with me?” If there was hesitation on Soonyoung’s face, then Wonwoo failed dramatically to notice it. He was blinded by compassion. All he did was grinning broadly, as feelings of joy washed his entire being. He was happy. So, so happy. Meeting Soonyoung, loving Soonyoung, being with him. He was happy. So he hoped he could share that happiness with Soonyoung, every single day, until they’re both old and wither. Soonyoung took a step closer. Their eyes locked on each other. A smiling Wonwoo was contagious. A smiling Wonwoo made Soonyoung smiled too. A smiling Wonwoo was so adorable. Soonyoung’s only wish was for that smile to never, ever falter, even once, in this life. And he would not be the reason that smile faltered now. “Yes, I will go out with you, Jeon Wonwoo.” Hands taken and held. Fingers intertwined. Cheeks blushing shyly at their newly found status: boyfriends. The love they shared was as warm as three o’clock evening sun. A love as easy as breathing fresh air in the morning. A love as satisfying as scenting newly washed bed sheets. A love shared, and blessed, by the universe.  
Jeon Wonwoo and Kwon Soonyoung.

Childhood friends turned best friends turned lovers.

Today, we pronounce you husband and husband.

May you two love and support each other in happiness and sorrow.

Until death do you apart.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“What’re you laughing about, Wonu?”
 
The said man let out more chuckles before they subdued into a serene smile. “Nothing,” he answered. “I just remembered how I fell in love with you.”
 
“Oh? Tell me.”
 
“No.”
 
That one word made Soonyoung pouted. “Awww~ C’mon, baby~” he snuggled closer into his husband’s arms. They were both sitting on their bed. Morning air was still fresh to breathe in from their huge, widely opened window. Wonwoo had bought him a bouquet of red roses yesterday and the smell of it came from their nightstand, faintly filling their lungs. As Wonwoo stroked his hair lovingly, Soonyoung unknowingly purred.
 
“It’s just a stupid story, after all…”
 
“That’s fine. I want to hear the reason why you decided to spend the rest of your life with me,” their noses were touching each other.
 
“Cheeky,” though, Wonwoo smiled furthermore. Hands were wrapping around his waist, pushing Soonyoung to snuggle into him even more. “Well, okay. I did warn you, tho.”
 
Soonyoung hummed as an agreement.
 
“That day when I shoved a big kimbap into your mouth, that’s when I fell for you…”
 
He watched as his husband blinked rapidly twice, before a wild, bewildered laughter consumed his whole being. He even snorted. Wonwoo could feel his cheeks burning from straightforward embarrassment.
 
“Who the fuck fell in love with a man swallowing a huge ass, gigantic kimbap, Won??”

I did.

“Well, if you replace that huge ass, gigantic kimbap with something else, you probably know how I felt—“
 
At this, Soonyoung slipped easily into a naughty smirk. “Innuendo. I love it,” he dipped a short, hot kiss, which Wonwoo happily indulged in, at least for seconds before the pain came back, forcing him to break their kiss with a loud smack.
 
“Ouch, ouch…”
 
“Oops, sorry—“
 
“No, it’s okay, Soonie, please stay…,” Wonwoo practically whined.
 
“No,” his husband’s look turned serious. “You’re not strong enough anymore to hold my weight on your lap, Won.”
 
“But I miss you on my lap…”
 
“Don’t be such a baby. What will our daughter say if she sees her father like this?”
 
“She’s a grown woman. She can handle a baby of a father!”
 
Wonwoo groaned. Much to his desperate attempt to make Soonyoung stay, his husband was more stubborn at this. He heard Soonyoung clicked his tongue, ignoring Wonwoo’s protest, and then removed himself from the bed to sit back at the chair. The only folding chair in that bright and all white small room. As much as Soonyoung wanted Wonwoo to feel at home, he just couldn’t alter everything. The bed was not theirs as far as the illusion allowed. It was small and not as comfortable. The roses were not from Wonwoo, but the other way around. Soonyoung brought it to hide the lingering smell of the alcohol. He caressed his husband’s hand softly, all fragile and bony, with drops of I.V. filling the silence in between their breaths.
 
Soonyoung stared tiredly at the man he had bestowed his everything; his childhood, his heart, his firsts, his children. He was his everything, as he’s his. From day 0, when they were still inside their mothers’ wombs, until the last breath they shared in this cycle of life, Wonwoo and Soonyoung were always together, taking little steps carefully, living their half lives as one whole.
 
“I’m sorry…,” Wonwoo breathed. He felt his eyes burnt with unshed tears. “I promised you forever, but I don’t think I can fulfill it…”
 
“Ssh, Wonu, please,” he silenced the man immediately. “You’re with me before I was even born until we’re these old, wrinkly relics. Our daughter even gave us a very healthy grandson already. If we’re together more than this, I’ll get bored with you.”
 
“But you never get bored with me!”
 
“You bet I don't!”
 
They both laughed, soft and full of understanding. It’s as if they were the only lovers ever existed in this exact moment. Soonyoung always loved that adorable smile of Jeon Wonwoo. From many years back until today, he would never let that smile falter.
 
“You know, Soonie?”
 
“Hmm?”
 
“Counting time down until the end is not an easy thing.”
 
Soonyoung tightened his jaw.
 
“But with you by my side, it’s not so bad either.”
 
Then, they shared a smile.
 
“I love you, Jeon Wonwoo.”
 
“I love you too.”
 
The sound of machines beeped, waiting patiently.

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