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Shuuichi lingers by the stairs, trepidation keeping him from moving forward.From the angle at which he stands near the top, he can see the door he’s meant to be moving towards. In the back of his mind he registers the sound of someone humming coming from below on the stairwell, an indication he should get moving already or at least do anything but continue standing in the middle of the hallway, staring.It’s not that he doesn’t want to go — that’s not it. Sure, it took an almost ridiculous amount of pep-talking to himself, and he eventually had to forcefully declare in his brain ‘I’m going to do this, there’s no stopping me now!’ to actually get him from his dorm, up the stairs to where he stands now, but. Still he hesitates, only narrowly resisting the urge to wring his hands together nervously.Nervous? Yes, Shuuichi’s certainly nervous, for a whole host of reasons.The killing game. The fact that four of his friends are dead, and the threat of another murder looms over him and the other survivors like a wet blanket. The fourth floor, painted red and dark and fashioned to look as horrifying as possible also makes his skin crawl with antsy anxiety just to think about.And, of course, the fact that his destination is the place where, not very long ago at all, he was knocked out and kidnapped to. Shuuichi’s not exactly a bug person, even discounting the Insect Meet and Greet from before. Just looking at the door as he has been for however long he's been dawdling outside leaves him uneasy.He chews on his lip, urging his feet to just take the plunge and enter Gonta’s lab already. Nothing. Figures.Shuuichi wants to go in, he does. (He wants a lot with regard to Gonta, if he’s being honest, but that’s not a thought he can even think of dealing with right now). But, ah. The bugs.He’s fully aware of the fact that the bugs and Gonta come as a unit — one follows the other. Which is fine! He likes Gonta — a lot, actually, and Shuuichi feels himself break into an involuntary smile just a bit at the thought — and he’s already resolved to do this despite the memory of the bugs crawling in his hair and clothes and wherever else they'd managed to wriggle into at the time.But that's not what's important right now. What is important, is the question that led him here to Gonta's lab in the first place:
Am I going to do this, or what?
The humming he’d registered a few moments prior breaks into the forefront of his mind as he recognizes the pitch of the voice as belonging to Kokichi. Before he can weigh the pros and cons of dealing with Kokichi and possibly having to explain himself or whatever other trouble his friend could cause him, Shuuichi’s surging forward, feet hitting the floor hard as he moves to reach the door to Gonta’s lab before he's spotted.He’s got the door open just as Kokichi emerges from the staircase, and Shuuichi winces as he shuts the door with a bit too much force to avoid being seen. He stands facing the door for a few long beats, sighing in relief as the sound of Kokichi’s humming passes the door and moves further down the hallway, unaware of his presence.It’s as Shuuichi’s exhaling his relief that he remembers just where exactly he’s burst into uninvited. He freezes, winces again at the silence, then finally spins on his heel to actually face the room.Gonta’s there, settled comfortably on the floor, eyes on Shuuichi and — and something long and brown and covered in legs cupped delicately in his large hands.“Shuuichi!” Gonta greets, looking surprised but nonetheless delighted (and doesn't that do pleasant, twisty things to Shuuichi's insides). Shuuichi waves, eyes still laser-focused on the bug in Gonta's possession.“Ah, hello, Gonta,” Shuuichi replies, tearing his eyes away as Gonta rises to his feet and approaches. Shuuichi tries his best to be polite and not lean away from the bug that travels the distance with him.“Gonta not expecting anyone to come in! But Gonta very happy to see Shuuichi after terrible Insect Meet and Greet...” His face falls briefly, and Shuuichi smiles in an attempt to hide his trepidation over this whole situation.“Oh, Gonta, I’m not mad or upset about that at all.” Not at you, at least. Shuuichi smiles, a bit brighter, and waits for Gonta to meet his eye before continuing. “It wasn’t your fault, just a misunderstanding. And I know you’re sorry, so don’t worry, okay?”“Oh, good! Gonta really glad to hear Shuuichi not mad at him...” Gonta pauses, blinks down at Shuuichi with bright, crimson eyes, head cocked slightly to the side. “Gonta not mean this in a rude way! But, uhm...Shuuichi, why are you here? Gonta thought you would stay away like everyone else.”Shuuichi shakes his head, trying to ignore the way Gonta being really glad about anything to do with him makes him feel. “About that, actually, I...ah. I’m here to spend time with you, Gonta. I-If that’s alright, of course.” Gonta watches him, still appearing a little lost, waiting for him to continue.“Honestly,” Shuuichi begins, and oh god is his face heating up? “I...r-really like spending time with you, Gonta. I’d like to get to know you more, and do things you like, and, ah...”He trails off, unsure of how to finish without making things weirder than he already has. He doesn’t even need to bother, though; Gonta’s face almost glows with the strength of the smile he bursts into, eyes laser-focused in on Shuuichi and almost looking a little watery. “Really?” Shuuichi remembers Gonta’s still holding the long, wiggly thing at the exact moment Gonta points to it. He sounds absolutely elated, though, so Shuuichi chooses to focus on that instead of the way the insect appears to leer up at him. Maybe that's just his imagination. “If Shuuichi want to do stuff Gonta like, you can meet Gonta’s bugs! Like Insect Meet and Greet, but better!”“About that...I, ah, want to be really honest with you. You love bugs, and you’re used to them, right? But I’m...not. Not yet. T-That doesn’t mean I hate them! I’m just not used to them, and I’m a little nervous around them because...the fear of the unknown, I guess...?”“But!” he cuts in, getting back on track, “I don’t want to be. I want to learn to like them because you do, and I want to do things you enjoy. So what I’m saying — or, asking, I guess — Gonta, is will you help me learn to like bugs?”The other boy is awe-struck and starry-eyed as he takes in Shuuichi’s words, and he nods vigorously basically as soon as he's shut his mouth around his question. Without another word he moves towards where he was sat when Shuuichi came in, scoops up the empty bug cage, and gently sets the wiggly bug into it. He places the creature back in its place with a surprising amount of care, then begins scanning the long wall of cages intently.Shuuichi wanders over to where Gonta idles by his bugs, taking the spot next to him — not freaking out at the proximity to Gonta or the bugs, thank you! — and following Gonta’s gaze to a cage low on the wall. He can't even begin to figure out what the bug in the cage is, but it’s large and covered in fluff and Shuuichi swears he can see a pair of fangs sticking out of it.“Hey, uhm, Gonta? If it’s not too much trouble...” Shuuichi laughs nervously, eyes downcast as Gonta tips his head to look down at him. “Could we start, ah, smaller? That one’s a little scary for a beginner like me, I think...”“Of course! Gonta want Shuuichi to have a good time this time.” Gonta’s focus immediately moves on; Shuuichi decides to leave it up to him and settles onto the floor, trusting his judgment on this one.He waits a few minutes as Gonta searches, idly letting his eyes wander around the large room. Despite his only previous memory being rather negative, Shuuichi finds himself almost...relaxed, the ambient sounds of crickets and something resembling running water doing well to soothe his somewhat frazzled nerves.“Shuuichi?” Gonta calls softly, breaking the almost-silence in the room. He looks up to find Gonta holding a bug cage containing a multicolored butterfly. “Is this good place to start?”He nods appreciatively, giving Gonta a smile as the boy settles noisily into a sit across from him, the cage held carefully in both hands. Gonta crosses his legs, sets the cage in the dip, and opens the lid enough to fit three fingers inside. It easily crawls onto the outstretched fingers it's presented with, and with practiced ease Gonta lifts it from the case for Shuuichi to observe. Delicate blue wings flap with quick, fidgety movements, and Shuuichi finds himself fascinated by the colors that flash over at him.“This one very pretty, but Gonta never seen one in wild before. Very fragile, and tiny like butterflies Gonta has seen before, in forest. Gonta have to be careful.”Shuuichi marvels at it from a distance, eventually lifting his eyes to look at Gonta properly again. Both sights are pretty, but Shuuichi certainly has his preference. “I would think it would fly away. But it’s staying very still.”“Gonta not sure,” is his reply, accompanied by a gentle shrug, so as not to disturb the butterfly that has taken to crawling slowly across Gonta’s palm. “Usually Gonta have to try for long time to keep bugs still in wild, but all bugs in lab stay still when Gonta pick them up.”Shuuichi does his best not to ponder the implications of that too much, and instead focuses on what’s in front of him. “Very pretty.”Yeah, he is. He hopes it comes across as a compliment to the butterfly.“Books say it from somewhere far away. Tropical,” Gonta adds as an afterthought, brushing a finger from his free hand against the bug gently. Its wings flutter, but still it doesn’t fly away. Gonta suddenly looks to Shuuichi, eyes alight.“Does Shuuichi want to hold?”“I—I wouldn’t want to hurt it,” Shuuichi answers honestly, because truly, he doesn’t know what would be worse: killing the poor butterfly on accident, or having to see the look on Gonta’s face if he did.“It okay. Gonta much bigger; if Gonta can hold without hurting her, so can Shuuichi.” Gonta holds out his free hand, and ignoring the way his heart is suddenly beating a lot faster, Shuuichi rests his hand as lightly as possible in Gonta’s, trying not to squirm as the butterfly is slowly, carefully nudged into his palm.“If Shuuichi scared, just let Gonta know, alright? Gonta will put her away,” Gonta promises as he watches Shuuichi’s face; with a bit of difficulty he shakes his head, offering Gonta a smile.“It’s okay for now. She just, ah, tickles is all.” Less lively, the butterfly crawls around his hand, its legs gently scratching his fingers. He tries to keep from twitching, and probably fails.His hand is also still resting in Gonta’s, but he tries not to think about it too much.After another short pause Gonta gently scoops the butterfly back into his hands, tenderly setting it back into its cage and shutting the lid. “You did good job!” he gushes, offering Shuuichi a thumbs-up and a smile that's almost blinding in its brightness. It's a losing battle, trying not to grin at the praise and the sweet face beaming back at him.“Only thanks to your help. Alright, what next?”Gonta seems a little surprised at Shuuichi’s insistence on continuing, but other than a delighted little hum he doesn’t respond as he stands and begins searching through the collection of cages next to them.“Gonta is thinking ladybug next. Ladybugs small, might fly around. Is that okay?” Shuuichi responds with a nod and waits patiently as Gonta pulls another cage from the wall and settles back into a cross-legged sit. As he gets comfortable, Shuuichi glances into the cage, and can’t help being a bit surprised.“Oh, those ladybugs aren’t red.”“Yes! Ladybugs can be red, yellow, orange, even pink! Gonta never seen pink before, so Gonta very excited to find them in lab!”And things continue on similarly: Gonta will show off his bugs, picking less exotic (and terrifying, in Shuuichi’s humble opinion) specimens to let Shuuichi marvel at, ask questions about, and hold. With every bug that they go through Gonta’s smile seems to grow wider, so even when Shuuichi finds himself sweating a bit at the idea of Gonta opening the hive tucked in the back of his lab and letting him hold a bumblebee, he swallows his anxiety and allows it to happen, finding Gonta’s elation every time he agrees more than worth it.They cycle through quite a few; several types of multicolored beetles, the bumblebee, a fluffy moth, and even the wriggly thing that had cowed Shuuichi so completely when he’d first entered. Before he even realizes it hours have passed, and there’s sleepiness weighing down both of their expressions.“Gonta has one more to show Shuuichi today.” Gonta’s standing, a figurative tower compared to Shuuichi, still sitting on somewhat-asleep legs and feet. He doesn’t lower himself back down yet, simply allows Shuuichi to observe the contents of the cage he's retrieved from the wall.It’s a tarantula. Shuuichi swallows uncomfortably.“Gonta understand if Shuuichi don’t want to!” Gonta reassures, still keeping his distance. “Gonta know lots of people scared of spiders, big ones too. Big spiders look scary sometimes, but this one very safe. Won’t bite, promise. Just scary looking, not actually scary.”Eyeing the cage, Shuuichi finds himself sort of unconvinced. In an attempt to laugh off his own nerves, Shuuichi offhandedly observes, “sort of scary-looking but harmless? That’s sort of like you, isn’t it, Gonta? You’re big and tall, but very nice and gentle.”Holy whoops did he not meant to say that.Shuuichi feels himself redden all the way up to the tips of his ears, and he seriously contemplates throwing his head into his hands or just letting the spider eat him to escape the embarrassment. There’s a long pause from Gonta, which only exacerbates the issue.“Gonta, ah...” Gonta's sheepishness is palpable in his voice; Shuuichi's still kind of too mortified to look. “Gonta don’t know what to say, but...thank you. Gonta glad Shuuichi think he's nice and gentle.”“Y-Yeah...” Shuuichi trails off awkwardly, but, refusing to let the situation sour, continues on, “I’m sorry if that...came out weird. It’s a good thing, promise. I like you how you are.”Gonta is certainly as red as Shuuichi now. “Gonta glad! G-Gonta like Shuuichi how he is, too.”Shuuichi coughs at the admission, and he knows Gonta doesn't mean it that way, but nevertheless his heart begins to jackhammer beneath his ribs almost hard enough to cause concern. Giving himself a few moments to recover before he trusts his voice, he eventually motions for Gonta to sit. “You can take it out now. I’m okay, I think.”Gonta does, once again settling into a cross-legged sit and letting the cage rest in his lap. The spider doesn’t move much, shuffles around a bit but otherwise doesn’t squirm and run around like Shuuichi sort of expected. With the same care present as with the previous bugs, Gonta lifts the lid and allows the tarantula to crawl onto his fingers before carefully maneuvering it out into the open air.Shuuichi half-stretches his hands out, falling a bit short as the bug crawls slowly along Gonta’s own palm. His renewed anxiety must show on his face, because Gonta leans backwards a bit, putting the slightest bit more distance between them.“You don’t have to,” Gonta assures him earnestly, a finger idly petting the spider's fuzzy back. “It okay if you don’t want to anymore.”“I, a-ah...” Shuuichi feels a short spurt of confidence enter his heart, and without thinking about it too much he says, “I’m a little nervous, to be honest. But I think if you, ah, help me...I’ll be able to do it.”“How can Gonta help?”Shuuichi feels warm, too warm, he’s definitely sweating and he kind of wishes he could duck out, but this is his chance, this is going surprisingly well — too well, considering his track record — and if not now, then who knows when he’ll have the opportunity again? In their situation, these things are so fleeting; if he doesn’t at least try, if he’s not honest, who knows when — if...Finally Shuuichi shakes his head, his resolve solidifying. “Can we hold hands?”...Not his smoothest delivery, but it gets the point across. Gonta jolts, mouth widening slightly as he processes Shuuichi’s question. He’s bright red as well, but there’s a smile on his face, and he doesn’t hesitate any further as he reaches his free hand out to take Shuuichi’s carefully.Gonta’s hand is big against his own, and with a grin he doesn’t even try to control he slots his fingers gently in Gonta’s. It’s such a small action, but it has Shuuichi’s heart working in overdrive, and he almost forgets about the spider.Almost, until Gonta holds out his spider-filled palm. “Hold your hand out. Gonta will set tarantula in palm, okay?”Shuuichi nods once, and tries not to cringe as the legs make contact with his skin. He feels his fingers shake against his will, but — mercifully — Gonta brings his free hand up under Shuuichi’s, not holding it so much as providing more support for the spider.Admittedly, it’s not the greatest sensory experience; the spider is sort of scratchy, and the points of contact by the legs feel weird in his hand, and the sensation of it crawling around his palm makes his stomach turn a bit, but it’s not terrible, and to be completely honest, Shuuichi has bigger priorities.Like, for example: how much he likes holding Gonta’s hand, and how much he wants to keep doing it.Neither of them speak; their glances float between the spider and each other’s faces, and that same feeling from before, the lack of consideration for time passing him by falls between them. Shuuichi thinks he might register the nighttime announcement playing in the background, but he’s not sure.Then, he feels something furry on his neck, and promptly falls backwards in surprise.In an outlandishly stupid move, Shuuichi had neglected to notice the tarantula crawling up the length of his arm, and its sudden appearance on his neck leaves him scrambling with instinctual panic. He groans as he hits his head off the ground, there’s a gasp from Gonta in front of him, and the sound of hands digging through his clothes in search of the spider has Shuuichi’s heart pumping wildly for a totally different, not fun reason.“Gonta so sorry!” is the rushed response from Gonta, and when Shuuichi pulls himself upright again the spider is back in its cage, momentarily discarded as Gonta watches him frantically, absolutely horror-struck. “Gonta didn’t mean to let that happen! Didn’t want to scare Shuuichi! Gonta so stupid, so sorry—”“I-It’s okay!” Shuuichi reassures in just as much of a frenzy, his hands flapping as he tries to think of a natural place to put them. He settles on his own knees, squeezing them anxiously. “I’m sorry, I...wasn’t paying attention. You’re not stupid at all, Gonta.”“A-Alright.”There’s slightly awkward silence as they both calm down, and Shuuichi has to smother a frown at the idea of ending on a sour note. He gets to his feet, watches as Gonta fiddles with the cages for a minute.“It’s really okay, I promise,” Shuuichi assures Gonta earnestly once more — who is still sporting a guilty frown. Hmm. He'd really rather like to see him smile again. “I had a lot of fun with you today, Gonta.”“Gonta had lots of fun with Shuuichi, too.” Ah, there it is. Under the sole focus of Gonta's returning smile, he feels his cheeks warm.“And...if you wanted to, I’d really like to do this again with you.”He’s given an excited nod in response, and. He could leave things here. They’ve both had a wonderful time; it had its low spots, but overall the time spent together was a resounding success. The mess that was the first Insect Meet and Greet might as well be fully forgotten, for how rosy Shuuichi's feeling about spending time with Gonta and his bugs presently.Shuuichi probably should leave, but...
Who knows when I’ll have the chance again?
“Gonta?” Shuuichi asks softly, lightly startling him into looking back towards Shuuichi.“Everything okay, Shuuichi?”“Yes,” he affirms confidently, and tries to keep the tone in his next question. “I, Gonta, ah...could I give you a...a kiss?”He's half expecting Gonta to not understand the implication behind what he's been asked, but by the look on his face, it seems, mercifully, he does. Gonta goes scarlet and freezes up, eyes focused intently on Shuuichi.“Shuuichi...want to k-kiss Gonta?”“Yes, I...I would. If that’s alright! Only if you want to, too,” Shuuichi says, serious as he tries to make clear as much as he wants this, it's entirely conditional on Gonta wanting it, too. Gonta seems to ponder the idea, before stepping towards Shuuichi and locking up again, head politely bent down more into Shuuichi's reach.“O-Okay, go ahead!”And, well, Shuuichi doesn’t need to be told twice. Refusing to lose his nerve he steps forward to meet Gonta, leans up onto his tip-toes, places a steadying hand on Gonta’s arm, and touches a feather-light kiss to his cheek.It’s an immeasurably soft gesture, and Shuuichi pulls away feeling as if he could float right out of the room. Like a butterfly gliding through the breeze.“...Thank you,” Shuuichi finds himself saying, not really knowing what the right thing to say is. Gonta doesn’t seem to mind either way. He has a large hand pressed to his cheek, and a pillow-soft smile on his face.“I’ll see you tomorrow?” Shuuichi half-asks, half-hopes aloud. Gonta can’t meet his eye without smiling even wider.“Yes. Maybe Gonta kiss Shuuichi next time.” The words are barely audible, but they send a shot of electricity through Shuuichi so fierce he has to consciously keep himself from falling over.“S-Sounds good. It's a date. I'll see you then, Gonta. Goodnight.”He’s given a wave in response, enthusiastic and shy and absolutely heart melting. Shuuichi steps out of his second Insect Meet and Greet grinning ear to ear.