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The perfectly sunny day started with a warm breeze and lazy clouds rolling around the sky. It was a month until summer and the people who got left behind were more or less a fourth of the usual campers. Never would they have guessed that an attack from rogue monsters who threatened to cross the boundaries of Camp Half-Blood would be the end of it. Their defenses were unprepared so they attempted to battle it out with their strongest demigod at the moment- Nico di Angelo, leading them. They were holding up pretty well, given the fact that the monsters they encountered were not familiar, to say the least. The four scorpion-like creatures, the size of cows, were surprisingly agile. Will Solace wore a white shirt that day. He wore that to be easily recognized as a healer, the one out of the chaos, the one who helped the wounded. He was supposed to be in a tent somewhere, aiding the ones who needed immediate medication. He wasn’t supposed to be here with the others. He wasn’t supposed to fight. This was never something Nico had expected. The feeling of dread and anxiety came upon him hard, the feeling that almost made him fall over from where he stood if not for the crooked tree beside him that kept him upright. He quickly rushed to the scene, all the while shoving stunned campers out of the way and took a step back involuntarily. He placed his hand over his mouth and let out a cry of grief. The stinging gash on his heart and the growing void in his gut made him freeze in his place and he eventually fell down to the ground with his head on his hands.Will wore a white shirt that day. It wasn’t supposed to be tinted with red. Will always made sure that he was going to be a regular demigod at camp. When he ordered Nico to be at the infirmary for three days, it wasn't just the type of healing he had expected. It was where they started to form their friendship and where he mended the tiny pieces of his heart.
"Y'know, Hedge told me." Will raised his gaze at the troubled boy who was staring intently at his entwined hands. Nico had been lying down on the infirmary bed and slowly sat up straighter but he was too focused on his scarred fingers to do much.
"What'd he tell you?" Nico finally looked up, momentarily looking sideways to hide his hesitance. "All of the things you've been through.... And I'm here to-" Will's comforting sentence was cut off by Nico's sudden outburst. He had clutched the sheets by that point and Will's wary eyes looked over at the white knuckles the boy had.
"Here to what? Here to give me a pep talk? To give me the same nonsense that everything's going to be suddenly okay now that the war's over? Because I'm already telling you. It's not. It hasn't been alright in my life for a long time, Solace. I don't think it ever will." Nico's words were laced with anger and venom, the feelings he tried desperately to harbor. There was an underlying tone of it all though. Loneliness. Will saw through the facade of this boy and he felt the urge to be someone he could lean on, someone to give reassurance to. Which was why Will's next move was either strangely brave or plain stupid.
Will grabbed his hand as the other boy went suddenly still. His fingertips skimmed the back of Nico's hand and then held it softly but firmly. Nico didn't make a sound of protest but instead clutched the boy's hand like it was the only grip keeping him stable. A sturdy hand ready to guide him through whatever hell he's been in. They both didn't care if they were mere strangers, the only thing that mattered was the burden he's slowly getting off of his shoulders. A tear escaped and trickled down his face, the comforting gesture didn't make him mind the current state he was in.
"Listen, I.... I don't know what to do or say to make you be okay. I also know that no one will hate you as much as you hate yourself.... But this I can be sure of, you ARE definitely going to be alright. I'm not sure when, but you will be. No one deserves happiness more than you do." Will spoke with a mild tone and pure understanding in his eyes. It was evident that his words affected the other boy as he held his hand tighter with tears threatening to fall down his pale face.
"And how would you know that's going to happen? How do you know I'm not running away again?" Nico said bitterly and looked down at his other hand gripping the sheet and slowly released it. He slowly blinked his watery eyes and looked up, resisting the urge to be vulnerable in front of the son of Apollo.
"Because deep down.... You know you belong." He murmured and sent a shy knowing smile.
Yes, Maybe... He thought. He could start again.
"Someone call Chiron!" Nico ordered. He recovered quickly when he thought that there was no use in crying if he wanted Will back. He and a dark-haired camper struggled to carry Will to his tent where most of the medical supplies were. The two gashes on his chest and abdomen spurted blood and they tried their best to have the best angle to support his body, as to not trigger other wounds."Will! What in the Hades did you think you were doing back there!?" Nico bellowed, worry seeping into his voice as he shouted. Other campers made way for them, protecting their backs until they were sure no monster was after them."Actually, don't answer that right now." Nico huffed while Will struggled to answer him. He incoherently mumbled profanities and swore to stop imagining if... No, don't even think about it, Nico chanted in his head. They reached the large white tent where some of the Apollo kids rushed about, running to get medicine from cabinets and bandaging wounds. As soon as the three of them came stumbling through, horrified gasps were heard and Will was ushered to a secluded part of the tent where there was a barrier from the others. The other camper left Nico and Will to the hands of the Apollo children and Nico slumped in a wooden chair near the bed and nervously ran his fingers through his hair while they tried to alleviate Will's current condition.
The both of them had instances wherein they would talk about what's going to happen in their lives five to ten years from now. They were mostly out in the strawberry fields, lying in the freshly trimmed grass, admiring the sunny blue sky and relishing the moments of idleness given by the active camp.
They would be making fun of the campers around them chasing one another and their other friends goofing around the beach and pushing each other in the water. They would make shapes from the clouds above them and Will would tell silly stories about how a certain cloud came to be and Nico only shook his head at the ridiculous poems he made up on the spot. As the laughter dies down, they'd stay still for a while -neither of them need words at some point- and continue to be quiet and adjust to the surroundings.
"Where do you see yourself in five years?" Will spoke suddenly, disturbing the silence and looked up at the boy lying beside him.
"What?" Nico opened his previously closed eyes and peered curiously at Will.
"Where do you see yourself in the future? Ten years, maybe?" He responded and adjusted his body so his elbows were supporting his weight.
"I honestly don't know. I want to be out of here though. Y'know, when it's safe for me.. Not that I hate it here, it's just I don't want to be stuck here for the rest of my life.." He rambled while sitting up straight. He looked up at the sky, hopefully finding a smart answer to say, like be of help in Camp or something.
"Me either. Don't tell this to ANYONE okay-" Will copied his actions and proceeded to sit with his legs tucked under his thighs and placed his hands on top of his knees.
"Like I have someone to gossip to? Really, Solace?" Nico raised his eyebrows mockingly.
"Shut up! Anyways, no one knows this... but I wanna be a doctor." He let out a sigh and looked up at the questioning face of the other boy.
"Um, aren't you already one?"
"I mean like a real life doctor. Y'know, go to college, go to medical school, be a doctor? I don't know. I mean, Annabeth wants to be an architect and she's on her way to be one. Some of the people I know are finally having the life they wanted -or at least trying to achieve something- and I want to be someone too, I guess." He explained. His eyes flitted over the other boy who lied back down again and placed his arms under his head.
"I wanna live in the moment." Nico stated quietly. "I want to go wherever life takes me. I'm not sure what I want to do y'know. Gods, I'm just technically 14. Maybe... For now, I'll try to be who I want to be. I don't wanna think about the future just yet." He shrugged.
"But...?" Will urged. He was waiting for the answer that'd let him smile cheekily at the son of Hades.
Nico rolled his eyes. "But..."
"Wherever I might be led to, I won't go where I'm too far from you."
Nico refused to leave the tent. He noticed the worried looks his siblings were giving each other while glancing at Will's injured body, also contemplating who would break the news to Nico."Nico, Lou Ellen said that they defeated the nasties outside and they were wondering where you went. I-I told them that Will's been gravely injured and they're trying their best to contact Chiron from Olympus. Are-are you alright?" A girl anxiously asked him while glancing away and not making eye contact with Nico."Just tell me what happened to Will." Nico pleaded while the girl let out a defeated sigh and what she said made him grateful he was sitting down or else he might've collapsed on the ground."He's awake but he's not healing. We don't know why, but we assume that the cuts are too deep and well-well...""But you can fix him, right?" Nico desperately asked."We don't know yet. The thing is, whatever stabbed him, was venomous. He's poisoned and we have never seen anything like it." Nico mostly listened. He didn't speak much but instead observed how Will spoke and what his random antics were. His wild hand gestures (which sometimes resulted to smacking him in the face) and how expressive his face when telling a story were the most amusing to admire. There were a few times he was caught staring, though. It was either Will didn't want to embarrass him or he didn't mind the attention. Nico opted for the first one.
Will would make Nico talk about things that would interest him too. He would tell mythology stories and the adventures he made in the mortal world. He would talk about the quests and the countries he went to -seeing as Will almost never went out of the boundaries of camp- and he would never notice he was enjoying relaying the tale of his misfortunes until Will pointedly blurts it out. At those moments, he wouldn't mind to do the talking just to hear the melodious and obnoxious laugh he's learned to love.
"I need to talk to him." No one argued with Nico's statement as they scampered to give him the privacy he needed. He slowly approached the makeshift hospital bed and apprehensively held his right hand. Will's hand was unusually cold but his face showed no signs of frigidness as sweat pooled on his forehead. He could see that he was struggling to keep his eyelids open and evening his breath."It hurts." Will solemnly said momentarily glancing at the other boy. As a matter of fact, he may not feel the physical pain Will was experiencing, but he could feel his own heart sinking into what feels like a bottomless void by simply seeing the most important person in his world, suffering."Nico, I might not be strong enough to.." Will coughed and didn't continue his sentence as he noticed Nico's face turn white as chalk and shaking his head vigorously from side to side."N-no! Don't you dare say that, Solace! You weren't even meant to be there. Why? Why did you go out?" Nico rambled in abstruse phrases, willing his racing mind to keep calm while the other tried but failed to form coherent sentences."I saw it coming after you. You had your back turned, and I-""The last thing I ever wanted anyone to do, was protect me for their life. And you... you just had to be there! It should have been me that's been poisoned, not you!" Nico ran his hands through his hair at the helpless fact that he couldn't turn events back. He desperately wished for time to change back to an hour ago, when he could've stopped Will from defending him. Could've. Could've. How many of these thoughts could've been stopped from popping in his head at that moment?"I don't have much time and strength to argue with you right now, so listen. I'm not expecting you to be thankful okay-" Will flinched and gritted his teeth as he felt a new surge of white, hot pain coming from his abdomen, which his siblings loosely wrapped a bandage around -now covered in his blood- and he blinked rapidly to erase the hazy fog clouding his vision."Will. Will! Someone help!" Nico alarmingly shouted. He noticed Will's sudden movements and the remaining people in the tent rushed to his side, with obvious panic and fright in their faces. They hastily replaced his bandages but the poison in his very veins were slowly spreading through his body, a hushed comment from the same girl he talked to, and they silently prayed for help to come."Chiron's here!" An abrupt male voice shouted and a sigh of relief broke out from the Apollo kids as a thunder of hooves were heard throughout the tent. Nico's ever beating heart, accelerated more as the centaur observed Will with a tight-lipped frown and worry in his eye. Of course, they had those times of misunderstandings. There are some things that needed to stay hidden. The secrets that the heart wouldn't dare allow to be revealed. The ghosts of the past trying to reach out and posses the mind. Yes, it was the inflamed memories of yesterday that made the pain harder to suppress. The times of isolation and the wishful thinking that he could be left alone.
It was Bianca's birthday. He woke up that day feeling somber at heart, like a huge boulder trapped him in a cave and he was slowly losing oxygen. He reached out to the figurine at his bedside table in his cabin and grabbed his worn-out jacket. He was planning to shadow travel somewhere that day, heading to the woods to get the least chance of getting noticed.
He looked down at the little toy. It was the same Hades figurine Percy gave him when he went back from his quest. The one that he said Bianca wanted to give him before she passed. He made a promise to himself to get rid of it but the small trinket was undoubtedly the largest part of his life. It was the embodiment of his past, the one thing he left behind but not truly forgotten.
On his way to the dark forests of the camp -the only light coming from the start of dawn- he noticed a weary looking figure appearing in the shadows of the sun. It was the blonde boy who always looked alive at five in the morning, exactly the person he was expecting to avoid- and the one who came towards him with a watchful glance.
"Nico, are you going somewhere?" Will inquired while Nico tried to rack his brain for an excuse.
"Uh yes, actually -I'm just going to- yeah, really important stuff." He tried to walk past the cross-armed boy, dodging the stare the other boy was giving him. Will narrowed his eyes at the stuttering Nico was doing.
"Are you okay?" He said more alert, managing to come closer to the hunched boy before he shakily took a step back and turned away.
"It's five in the morning, Will. Aren't you supposed to be asleep?"
"I could say the same for you."
"Just.... I need to be alone. Please." He muttered. He silently begged for the older boy to leave him alone to his thoughts. Once Nico turned away and presumed the older boy returned to his own cabin, his hesitant movements made Will had the urge to follow him until they reached a large oak tree.
"Nico, wait. You know I-"
"Why can't you just leave me alone, Solace? Why don't you realize that I don't need you right now? You can play doctor all you want, you can pretend I'm someone you need to fix... Truth is, I'm not your patient and you're certainly not any better than them. You just can't assume everyone's just going to be your best friend." Nico bitterly said. The hurt look on the boy's face made him flinch and realize what he just did. He blamed his misery-induced brain for the trembling of Will's own hands, the most stable he's witnessed once were now uncontrollably shaking by the statement he just let out.
Maybe it's for the best, Nico regretfully thought. Maybe it was time to let go of a fantasy that someone would truly accept who he was, flaws and all. His past was the desperate call to go back to reality, the harsh truth that the burden was still with him all along. The stinging wound of death and isolation creeping up on him like a bug that won't scuttle away.
"I won't give up on you." Will whispered. His head was bowed and the silent tears were hidden from sight. Nico turned back to the other boy, seemingly curious if he heard the faint words of Will.
"I won't give up on you, Nico." He raised his head, desperately controlling himself to not crumble. He stood his ground and planted his watery eyes on Nico. He had a determined gaze on and walked a step forward.
"I know what it feels like to lose a loved one, okay? I didn't just show up here with no family. I lost them... I lost them all." Will whimpered and his usual sturdy form, now shaking, let himself fall to the grassy ground. Nico tentatively walked towards him and as soon as Will showed no signs of withdrawing, he sat close to him and their close proximity didn't feel an issue as he let out a sigh.
"I was the one who left them. I-I didn't run away or anything, I mean when I found out about who I was, who my real father is.... I knew what I was supposed to do." Will had his eyes set far away, having flashbacks of his younger days of when he was living in a mundane world. The beautiful sunsets and warm embraces he experienced with his mother and two younger siblings came back like a tidal wave engulfing him in his past.
"You had to protect them, somehow." Nico silently concluded. All of them knew about the risks of being a demigod. The stakes of being half-godly was high -with monsters constantly being a hindrance- and the struggle of always being on the look out if someone you love gets hurt.
"Exactly. It was worth it in the end anyway. Father gives me updates now and then. After that earthquake, I just... had to do it."
"Wait, earthquake? So you mean-"
"It was the only way. When an earthquake accident happened years ago affected my home, the satyr and I grabbed the opportunity to do it. Why do you think I never go out of camp? Why do you think I never went home for the holidays? For school? To see mortal friends? It's because I've always planned since then to-"
"Fake your death." Nico finished his sentence. He was left speechless by the revelation he just heard. Never, in a thousand years, would Nico have imagined raw pain thrusted upon this good-natured son of Apollo. His tongue betrayed him as he struggled to find comforting words or maybe a reassuring gesture of sympathy. He was never one people came for comfort, anyway.
"Why? Why are you telling me this?" He abruptly said and slapped a hand over his mouth.
"I'm sorry. It came out wrong, I meant- I meant to say.."
"I told you that because I knew it was time for someone to know what my backstory was. I told you that, not because I wanted your pity, or for you to think differently of me. I told you that because whatever you're going through today, tomorrow, or ten months from now, I want you to realize that I may be a self-proclaimed doctor... but I'm also a patient."
"I'm also like you who never wanted any fixing. I'm a patient that tried so hard to cure myself without the help of others because that's who I am. I never wanted anyone to know I was broken and here I am." Will miserably continued.
"I'm telling you this because we live in a world where there's darkness in every corner but there's also overwhelming light in every step you take. We live in a world where misery is the breath you take and it's up to you on how to hide you're not okay. The thing is, I hope the shadow from yesterday isn't the one thing that's going to keep me from living. I just hope you do, too." Will finished and breathlessly stood up and started to walk away from the stunned and contemplating son of Hades.
"Wait." Nico announced as he ran to catch up with Will.
"I never got to say thank you. For everything." Nico suddenly wrapped his arms around the older boy, who visibly relaxed and hugged back.
There wasn't a thing that they could change about that moment. Years from now, they'll remember that hug in the woods, where they started to truly know something from one another. They were the home both of them needed, but never knew they did.
Chiron had said he needed some space to heal the injured boy, so the rest of them were ushered away by Nico who was the only one Chiron asked to stay. He watched anxiously as the centaur tried different ways on how to mend his wounds, but after every try, a vague shake of his head left Nico wishing that he was there instead of him. Will was conscious the entire time Chiron was there. He felt temporary relief whenever he applied some sort of liquid on his wounds, but as soon as he felt at ease, the pain came back and he would hear a faint cursing. After five times of useless trying, the next thing he heard was a low muffled voice, and after that was a strangled cry."Di Angelo, the monsters you faced today were of no ordinary capabilties. I'm afraid to say that the creature that injured Will Solace had an extraordinary and ancient type of poison. I'm also sorry to say that I have tried every antidote I know and it did very little significance. This is beyond my reach." Chiron bent down and explained as softly as possible. Nico's every nerve were on end and he didn't know what to do. He couldn't shadow travel to Olympus, ever since the second giant war, he had been afraid to try simply because he almost disappeared the last time he tried it. He wasn't going to attempt shadow traveling with Will. He felt as if the air has knocked out of him. He felt as if his soul were residing in the Fields of Punishment, wondering if this was a nightmare or just plain cruelty. He desperately looked at Chiron who had an expression of mutual sadness and meant to give them a final moment."I'll try to see if I contact his father. Stay with him, alright?" They were both lazily sitting on Nico's bed, engaged in a game of cards. They were most likely entitled to rest, given the fact that Nico had been a swords instructor for the younger demigods while Will's always busy with being the camp's main healer. Lately, they never had time to spend leisure time because of their tasks. They didn't admit it at first, but they did miss each other's company.
"I've been wondering, how does death feel like? I'm not scared of it or anything, it was just a thought." Will mumbled, intensely concentrated on his deck of cards.
"Of course, ask the son of death what dying feels like." Nico retorted while playfully rolling his eyes at the blond boy across him.
"Hey, I didn't mean it like that." Will pouted.
"Anyways, I was thinking of ways I could possibly die, y'know, like if I'm going to look all heroic and stuff." He puffed his chest out while Nico squinted his eyes at him.
"You're probably going to die doing something stupid. Like accidentally falling from a tall pine tree because someone dared you to pluck leaves from the top."
"And you'll probably waiting at the bottom of the tree to catch me." Will batted his eyelashes and winked at the suddenly flustered boy.
They were joking only, of course, but the funny feeling in Nico's gut made him think that he hoped Will outlived him. He had a strong will to protect the son of Apollo as long as he's alive.
"Don't die on me, okay." Will humorously said but he sensed a serious tone underlying it.
"Wouldn't dream of it." Nico emphasized. "As long as you don't die on me either."
They then changed the subject to Mythomagic to Nico's embarrassment, and spent the whole day silently thanking they were alive to have each other.
"There's nothing to be done, Nico-""Don't say that." Nico weakly said. "You're the son of Apollo. Surely your dad can heal you. Will, don't you dare give up on me." His voice slightly cracking from the intensity of his emotions coursing through him at the moment. Will could definitely feel it. He could feel the pinpricks of venom making its' way towards his whole body. It was a miracle he survived this long, but maybe it was also because of the person he treasures the most, sitting beside him with a look of distraught and agony. He had to hold on a little longer. Just enough for..."Nico, take the object from my pocket." Will murmured. He didn't know if it was possible but he actually felt his life force leaving him every second. He had to be fast."There's been something I've always wanted to give you ever since that day in the woods and it deserves someone special to wear it. It was my mother's." Nico took out a shiny silver ring with a yellow gem embedded on its' center from Will's right pocket."Will, are you sure-" His sentence was cut short by Will taking his trembling hand and looping his finger through the ring. Will smiled slightly at the sight of the ring and looked back at Nico, who looked like he's swallowing a lump in his throat.Will looked around the enclosed room and noticed that some of his siblings were outside the room and trying their best to look that they'll be okay. He also noticed that his eyes were misty too, he didn't want to leave them behind. He just hoped that the new cabin counselor of the Apollo kids would just be as brotherly and caring as he was. At the thought, he began to close his eyes."No. No. Will you can't -possibly die after- keep your eyes open! Look at me Will! Don't let go, please. For me." Nico begged. He wouldn't take it. He can't."You haven't achieved your dream of becoming a doctor, remember? You told me, you told me you'd try to be normal, and we'd leave Camp with good memories and a life ahead- Will, I can't do that without you!" Nico anguished, the tears he desperately held back now free falling down his face unto where his hands clasp Will's pale one."Father, please... If you've ever been my dad, don't take him away. You have to do something!""I can still see you in the Underworld, Will. Remember? I'm the son of Hades I could do anything I want." For the second time in his life, he had to experience another heartbreak, another tragedy, another loss. First, his sister Bianca, now, it was Will. Life was anything but fair. He remembered something Will had said to him in the midst of his despair, the enclosing grip of demise that made it hard to breathe. 'I'm telling you this because we live in a world where there's darkness in every corner but there's also overwhelming light in every step we take. We live in a world where misery is the breath you take and it's up to you on how to hide you're not okay. The thing is, I hope the shadow from yesterday isn't the one thing that's going to keep me from living. I just hope you do, too.' Nico closed his tired eyes and let the other boy weakly grasp his trembling hands. As the other campers went inside the tent, it was filled with a deafening silence as they waited for someone to break it. Will's siblings now crowded the small white room and Nico was rooted on his spot. Will smiled softly at his siblings and murmured reassurances as his gaze landed on Nico."Don't do anything stupid, alright? Promise me you won't try any Underworld stuff to resurrect me, Nico? Don't cry, I don't want my last memory of you to be crying over me." Will softly said, finding it harder and harder to stay awake. Nico urged himself to adhere to him, smiling sincerely to at least get a sense of uprightness. For Will, after surviving all that he could, it was like closing his eyes would be the best rest in the world."I love you, Nico di Angelo." Those were his last words. To many, Will was a brother, the helping hand that everyone needs. He was the one who had the brightest smile in times of great peril. He was one of the greatest demigods who ever walked the grounds of the world. He's not truly gone, he will always be there, as long as they remember him. The echoed remorse of the cabins were reminders of how Will impacted everyone's lives. To Nico, he was more than just a friend, he was a destined partner whom Nico would never regret meeting and had the honor of sharing the deepest darkest parts of himself. For he was the sun, and Nico was merely a moon, his short-lived glow reflecting the original light. Nico never cried after that. He's only living in the memory of Will where he wasn't on his deathbed, on the verge of dying. Up until now, where he left Camp to pursue something much greater, he wears the ring on the finger where his skull ring was. Will would always be in every aspect of his mind, a personal angel from his memories. It was what Will would've wanted. Maybe he didn't know how to save Will's life during the time, but Will Solace undoubtedly and effortlessly did something he knew how to do. He saved Nico's life.