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Was I having a sweet peaceful dream, or was it a wet one? Anyway, something climbed on top of me forcing me to wake up. I opened my eyes trying to discover who would be my next victims, but the brightness blinded me, I squinted trying to get used to the light until I could see clearly who it was."Ah, it's just you, Good morning Cerberus" I greeted the three individuals in a row on my chest. "Good morning, Master" The three of them told me in unison as they moved their arrow-shaped tails from side to side with what I think was enthusiasm."So... by this you meant that you would be my personal alarm?" I asked looking into the piercing crimson eyes of the middle demon."Yes!" They answered snuggling into me. "Stroke us to turn us off""Yes-yes" I said laughing, rubbing my hands behind each of their canine ears, "Now get off of me, I have to go to the kitchen before Pandemonica kills me" I explained, wincing involuntarily imagining what he would do to me if he found me sleeping late.I waited for the three girls to get off me and I got up grabbing my sunglasses from the bedside table. "By the way, what time is it?" I asked them just out of curiosity, putting on my round glasses."It's / twelve / in the afternoon" They answered, completing each other."Oh, I see... WAIT WHAT?" I jumped in fright grabbing my phone from the table to see the time. "I WAS SUPPOSED TO GET UP AT 08:00 IN THE MORNING!""Yes, we know, /but it's just that /we fell asleep" They confessed getting me to pat my forehead."Pandemonica is going to kill me" I declared more for myself than for them.I closed my eyes analyzing the situation, I thought that maybe Pandemonica would only torture me a little if I knelt before her begging for mercy.Changing out of my pajamas into casual clothes and i went through the bathroom in my room before heading out into the hallway. I was heading towards the stairs but I was intercepted by some hot fucking demoness who came out of his room probably hearing my footsteps."Nice pants, they would look great on my bedroom floor~" She said with a seductive voice winking at me."Good morning, Zdrada," I answered, ignoring her flirtation, trying not to fall into temptation. "I see that someone woke up a little late, right? How about you come in here and I'll give you a good time?" She said making an obscene sign with her hands. "You know, before the four eyes kills you” She smiled wickedly showing her sharp teeth. "Maybe you'll get lucky and I'll castrate you" She said, approaching me until I could feel her breathing, and feeling my crotch with one hand, she added "Although of course... that would be a problem for me~""HA, HA, very funny" I answered monotonously, taking her hand away from me.“Heh, we both know I'm not kidding."I know" I admitted bitterly.She began to search for something in her tight black jeans, and pulled out a lighter alongside a box of cigarettes."Hey, what did I say about smoking inside the house?" I asked for."Fuck you" She said, giving me the middle finger."Either you turn it off right now or I swear I'll turn it off on your skin"Of course he was lying, he would never get that far... unless..."Oh~ so you suddenly got balls, Heh." I can swear a slight blush appeared on his cheeks before he put the cigarette down and blinded me with smoke. "You pervert, you just want to leave your mark on my soft pale body, don't you?" She asked me. "That turns me on."Suddenly the door in front of Zdrada's room opened. "How unpleasant" Zdrada's little sister said."Good morning, Malina," I greeted, looking straight at her. "yes-yes, whatever" She answered with a very clear disinterest while touching his forehead, "I have a migraine" She confessed with his always bad mood approaching us. Could you go talk somewhere else? I ask with some annoyance in her tone."Ohhh~ but look who it is~" Zdrada said wrapping an arm around her. "My favorite alcoholic, Malinka!" I point out taking advantage of her post-drunk state to annoy her even more."Fuck you, Zdrada" he answered, hitting her arm, looking at her with his characteristic frown."No thanks, I've already been there" She said, smoking his cigarette again.Malina simply ignored Zdrada focusing her gaze on me."Well, since you're here, come on in, I need your help with something" She said before a laugh could be heard coming from his sister."Wow, you just woke up from your alcoholic coma and you already want to fuck him, slow down speedster" She mocked pointing at her with a pistol-shaped hand receiving a look of hatred from Malina.The air was tense, I pretended to cough before speaking to Malina. "Not that I'll mind helping you, but I have to go prepare for my funeral" I confessed.She raised an eyebrow. "Were you up late again?""I bet he was touching himself all night" Zdrada suggested."Cerberus fell asleep" I explained, ignoring Zdrada's comment."I told you it was a bad idea" Malina declared."Yes, and you were right, but I couldn't refuse, they used the tactic of glassy eyes and sad ears, that should be classified as a deadly weapon" I acknowledged ashamed."You just had to say no, it wasn't that hard" The younger sister commented."It's hard to say no"Zdrada smiled instantly. "Do you want a black kiss?""No" I replied without hesitation."You see" Malina pointed out."Are you kidding? we are talking about Zdrada""Yes, you're right, it's not fair..." She said putting a hand under his chin and added. "Get on the roof and jump" She ordered me monotonously."What? No!"She patted her face. "Now what's your excuse?""Well, maybe if I did that, it would kill me""You see? It's not that hard to refuse""You're comparing a simple request to be an alarm clock with a request for suicide!""Well, accepting Cerberus as your alarm clock was practically suicide so it's basically the same thing."I sighed realizing that he was right. "Okay" I acknowledged "Now, if you'll excuse me, I must go accept my death" I said before the door next to Malina opened.“Yes, you are dramatic, mate" Said the new demon of the room."Justice!" Name the demon with dark glasses. "Hello!" "Hello / What's up" Malina and Zdrada saluted at the same time."Good morning companions!" She replied with her typical cheerful smile. "What's up buddy? Why are you making a scene?" She asked approaching us.Zdrada looked at me mischievously. "He was masturbating all night, so he fell asleep and didn't make coffee""Oh…well, I guess we all need some time alone" Justice shared."That's not what happened!" He exclaimed embarrassed.Malina brushed her hair back and explained "The idiot left Cerberus in charge to wake him up." His gaze focused on me "And you can imagine the rest""Oh, that was a bad idea" replied the blind-eyed demon."I noticed" I said bitterly."Well, don't worry, I'll make an altar in your honor" She laughed, placing a comforting hand on my shoulder."Thank you""Hahaha, calm down, mate, I was just kidding" She said separating from me. "I'm sure if you explain what happened, he'll understand""Do you really believe it?""Yes... Well or at least I only gave you a light punishment" She explained scratching her head."No, don't give me hope..."Zdrada's laugh filled the hallway. "If you're lucky, maybe he'll just stick a "toy" up your a--Her sister interrupted her before she could complete the idea. "Shut up Zdrada"A shiver ran through my body at the thought of that possibility."If so, I'd rather be beheaded" I confessed honestly going to the stairs listening to them support me morally."Good luck!" All three said at the same time."Thank you!" I yelled from the stairs.Being downstairs, it only remained to cross the living room to reach the kitchen. I swallowed hard as I approached my future grave, I was lost in thoughts of what my funeral would be like when a groan came from the sofa."How indecent! Asking me for a kiss after our tenth date. Perverted!" I'd know that moan anywhere."Modeus, what are you doing?" I asked curiously. She was startled."Oh! It's you, you scared me" She confessed, playing with her fingers. "H-hi" She greeted with flushed cheeks.I was totally stunned by her white heart-shaped pupils."Good morning" I answered a little later once I was able to clear my head.A small murmur along with the sound of pencil on paper came from under the foot of the sofa."Oh, I see, so the right thing to do is to ask for a kiss after date number 10, how interesting..."I approached in the direction of the voice and saw a halo of light floating to the side of the chair, I jumped on top and faced her from above as if she were Spider-Man."No, it almost never works like that, Azazel" I clarified, scaring him out of my sudden appearance, I must admit that was funny. "The first kiss usually happens after the second or third date, of course unless you are not looking for something serious and you do it on the first, but for that there must have been chemistry and that."
"Th-that's impossible" She declared searching through the pages of the notebook until she found what she was apparently looking for, "According to what Miss Modeus said, on the first date there is usually... mating" She explained blushing."What?" I said surprised before looking at the named demon. "Modeus Where did you learn that?""I-I learned it from the book you gave me" She confessed, avoiding looking at me."Yes... I should definitely be more careful with what I buy you" I reconsider, getting up from the chair. "By the way, what are you doing?" I asked before looking at the television. "Oh, a visual novel?""Yes" Modeus said."Where did they get it?""Miss Malina gave it to us" Azazel explained, surprising me."Malina? that's weird, what does she do with those kind of games?""She said she had been swindled.""Swindled?"Modeus showed me the game box on the couch."Ohhh I see, any lover of turn-based games could be confused by that cover""Modeus, look! He's going to kiss us!" Azazel stated, looking at the screen."How indecent~!" The demon exclaimed, I could swear I saw hearts come out around her head."Well! I'll leave we alone""Alright!" They answered at once as she finally went into the kitchen....The moment had come, I was hiding by the side of the door, well actually frame, we don't have a door in the dining room. Taking a deep breath, I puffed out my chest and showed myself at the entrance.There was no one.I didn't understand what was happening, until two hands covered my eyes."Who I am?" one of the girls behind me asked.I was so nervous that I couldn't recognize his voice, so I went for the most likely option."P-P-Pandemonica?" I hesitated.Somehow I could feel her body tense."Pandemonica?" Do you really not recognize me? She said separating from me.I turned around on my feet to find out who it was."LUCIFER!" I said scared. She crossed her arms. "I'm sorry! It is just that-- Lucy started laughing as she moved in front of me."Easy honey, I'm just kiddi-... What's going on? Why do you look so nervous?" She asked placing her hands on his hips.I breathed and spit. "Yesterday Cerberus asked me if it could be my alarm, but I told him no so they used their lethal weapon""Glassy eyes and sad ears?""Exact""Yes, they could convince anyone, of course, except me" She said proudly."As I was saying," I said before explaining further "Malina said it was a bad idea, but I said, how bad can it be? Then I went to sleep, and I was dreaming about..." At that very moment... I remembered that yes, it had indeed been a wet dream, a trace of curiosity appeared in Lucy's eyes when she saw me frozen "Things..." I vaguely completed before taking a deep breath "And then Cerberus woke me up but emeditates the time it was too late, so I left the room and ran into Zdrada who complimented me like I was a pervert and then--Lucy stopped me by making a sign with the palm of her hand. "Honey, get to the point"I puffed out my chest once more, and answered quickly "In short, I didn't make Pandemonica's coffee, so she's going to kill me"Before he could even answer me, someone spoke from the doorway."Don't worry, your butt is safe!" She confessed smiling looking at me with her whitish eyes."Hey? What do you mean by that, judgment?" I said with a raised eyebrow at the dark-skinned demon who was approaching Lucy's side.
"I did it instead of you!" She stated proudly in his classic high pitched voice."What? Really?" I asked incredulously."Yes!""Because?""As you know, I always get up before everyone to check that everything is as it should be!""Aha...""And that's when I remembered what you said to Cerberus! And I had a sneaking suspicion that they would fail his mission, and I was right! When I walked into your room this morning they were asleep next to your bed!" I explain getting confused."And why didn't you wake me up?" I asked awkwardly."Because you were tired" She confessed, lowering his tone."You should have woken me up anyway" I said smiling.She shook her head "No, after all, it was my fault that you were so exhausted, the least I could do for you was let you sleep while you completed your duties"I really wanted to hug her, and I was going to, until a question popped into my head. "Did you take care of the pancakes too?" I asked nervously knowing that she wasn't very good at cooking."No honey, I'll take care of that" Lucy replied."Oh! Thank you!" I thanked before thinking with my stomach. "Lu, by any chance...?""Yes, I left pancakes for you in the fridge.""Awww" I expressed with tenderness. "Thank you, Honey" I thanked giving him a kiss on the forehead.Judgment began to cough."Yes-yes~, you too Judgment" I laughed approaching her, I lifted her up in the air without much effort and gave her a hug and a kiss on the cheek "I love you!" I admitted tenderly seeing a beautiful blush appear on her cheeks as she whispered "Me more"."Just avoid telling Pandemonica the truth" She replied into my grasp. "I told him you were busy so you convinced me to make him his coffee" She explain, adding. "Of course he was upset at first, but he got over it with the first sip.""Understood" I said, separating from her, "Then I just have to keep Pandemonica from knowing that I couldn't make her coffee..." Lucifer and Judgment started making signs to me to cut something, which I didn't understand and kept talking, "...Cause she never has to find out, that I fell aslee--"WHAT YOU WHAT!?" My skin prickled completely upon hearing the voice behind me.I watched Judgment and Lucifer pat each other's foreheads "Oh no" I thought instantly."Don't tell me, is Pandemonica true?""Yes" They affirmed at the same time."Does she look angry?" I asked watching them look behind me."More or less" They confessed with a gesture of their hands."It's going to hurt" I stated turning around accepting my ending.
"May I know why you woke up so late?" Pandemonica asked taking off her glasses, she was going to answer her when she interrupted me. What did I say about sleeping more than eight hours?"Is bad" I replied."And?" She said wiping her glasses with her shirt and then putting them back on."That it can increase the risk of suffering from cardiovascular diseases, which are the main cause of death in the world..." I reminded him."In summary?" She asked annoyed pinching the source of her nose."Sleep 8 hours is good, sleep more or less than 8 hours is bad" I replied, feeling like a child being scolded by his mother."Fine~" She smiled pleasantly."Well if you'll excuse me I have to go" I said walking towards the exit trying to escape."Wait! Where do you think you are going?" She asked stopping me."Ummm, with...Zdrada?""I'm pretty sure you didn't recharge enough 'energy' after your last encounter" She explain, i not so sure how he got that information, but I wasn't about to discuss my sex life right now."Umm... did I say Zdrada?" I asked, playing dumb. "I meant Malina!""He has a headache" he answered immediately, to my bad luck."How do you know?""He asked me for hangover pills.""Just--Pandemonica interrupted without letting me finish. "Stop trying to escape!""Oh come on, I'm sorry, I know I fell asleep, but it wasn't my fault, it was the fault of--"He interrupted me again. "Cerberus?""Yes! What? How do you know?""They confessed""Thanks god!" I said to myself, then asked. "Where are they?""In the same place where you will be if you don't shut your mouth!" She exclaimed."Oh well, you shut me up" I raise my hands in surrender."Do you know what's going to happen to you now for not making me coffee? TRUE?"I kneel before her. "You're going to kill me?""What? No!" She answered.My heart stopped, remembering Zdrada's words "Y-you're going to... p-put something in my a..." I stammered shaking like jelly."What? / What? / What?" asked the three demons in the room."IDIOT DON'T GIVE HIM AN IDEA" I thought "Nothing"A sigh came from Pandemonica. "I only worry about your health..." She admitted."Sleeping 8 hours isn't going to kill me... probably... maybe..." I said not so sure."Okay, I'll gloss over it this time, just because it wasn't your fault" She clarified approaching me.I sighed in relief seeing her heading to the coffee pot on the counter.Being safe, I saw through the window the beautiful blue sky "Another day, in one piece..." Several footsteps approached the kitchen."Owner!" Said calling me Cerberus standing in a row from left to right. "Thanks for last night / We slept very well / Thank you" They said in order."Oh you're welcome""We slept very hot last night / Though you should have stopped when we said I wouldn't come in / Try to be less rude next time."Without having looked at myself in a mirror I was sure that I was pale. "They are talking about the pajamas I bought, they didn't fit them so they wanted to sleep naked but I refused""H-hey... don't say things that could c-could be misunderstood""Oh! and we loved feeling your hand caressing our bodies" They declared at the same time while wagging their tails erratically.I could feel killing intent coming from my back, I slowly turned back meeting Pandemonica's bloodlust filled gaze."P-P-Pandemonica they're not talking about what you think they're talking about.""So that YOU! YOU were the reason why they fell asleep... huh?" She spoke grabbing a cup of coffee."NO, NO, NOT AT ALL, IT'S ALL A MISUNDERSTANDING, I DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT! REALLY! I'M INNOCENT!" I explained awkwardly kneeling me.I looked back waiting for one to save me, but I saw that Lucifer was holding two Cerberus from the suit and Judgment was carrying the remaining one in his arms as they sneaked out of the room."DO NOT GO!" I extended my hand in vain seeing how my only hopes of surviving, disappeared in front of me after reading a "Sorry" from his lips. "TRAITORS!"Trembling, I turned around. A sadistic smile decorated her face as she ran her index finger around her cup."If you really care about me, put the cup down" I pleaded.She began to lower it little by little. "Okay, slowly... slowly..." I said softly.He placed the cup on the saucer on the table, and I walked backwards towards the exit."I swear... I'll never do it again..." I whispered trying not to revive the volcano."I believe you..." She confessed with a smile drawing a sigh of calm from me "...But not my coffee" She declared, raising the cup and taking a sip."NO! NO AGAIN!" I said running for my life before everything went black.
[...]
Needless to say what happened next, anyway, I have very confused memories of that moment, the only thing I remember exactly was waking up sitting in complete darkness, something covered my eyes and mouth, my body was very sore... and naked, and with great discomfort in my noble parts.A door opened and laughter bounced around the room.“Ha, and then I'm the masochist" I recognized Zdrada's sometimes very irritating voice.His steps approached me and suddenly I was able to speak, apparently he had a gag in his mouth."Another blue balls day?" she asked in a playful tone."Yes" I replied stressed "Could you…you know…give me a hand?"“Heh, No~ My offer expired…let's say…about 5 seconds ago" She said walking away from me. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have someone else whose life I have to screw up""Wait!" I yelled, stopping her. "Please? Just a minute” I pleaded awkwardly."HA! Nope"I knew she would say that..."I hate you" I said pouting"You weren't saying the same thing the other night~" She replied, moving away from me again."Can you at least let go of me?!"“No~!"And take off my blindfold?!""Fewer""Show half a boob even?""Pff, of course.""Really?""Nope""Bitch""Thanks for the compliment, chump~!" It was the last thing I heard before the door closed...."Oh, now that I remember, didn't Malina ask me to come to her room earlier?" I thought during my moment of reflection in the solitude of the dark.I sighed...Having a harem of Devils is... Painful
End of the Pilot Chapter!
Depending on how well this pilot is received, I'll decide whether to go ahead and do a series in the near future.