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Losing an arm had been a difficult adjustment for someone as egotistical as Captain Kid. Barely surviving that clash had been a traumatic blow to the entire crew. Pacifist my ass....The cut had occurred just at the left elbow, severing the brachial artery, the kind of injury that could easily lead to death from blood loss. There was so much blood it took three transfusions just to get his body stable. Fuck that red-haired bastard's crew! Damn Beckman! We'll retreat for now, but I will have my revenge one day.Quincy, his ships doctor and Pomp, his field medic, had managed to patch him up, but the left side of his face was scarred badly, as was his torso and right arm. Six days went by before he came to. The odd phantom limb feeling was the most confusing and frustrating experience of his life. He kept trying to do things with his shitty nub.It had been a humiliating loss. The next two islands his crew visited in the New World suffered greatly as a result of his rage. Fuck whose protection you're under! Killer yelled at him for throwing a tantrum, resulting in the dumbest shouting match in all of the four seas. For some reason, bonking that yellow furball over his stupid masked head with nubby had been gratifying as fuck. It was hard to stay mad after that.It took months getting used to his prosthesis and it hurt like a bitch the first time he connected it. The design itself was a bit clunky, which was fine for battle, but difficult for everyday tasks like eating, bathing, and dressing. The journey had been mortifying. Killer had been a godsend but it was unfair to expect him to do everything... well I am closer to everyone as a result, he thought his ears matching the same red as his hair.Five months passed, with the crew of misfits arriving at a small winter island. By now, Eustass Kid recovered fully and finally started to feel like his old self again. And by that we mean cocky. "What's the name of this place?" Kid shouted, using his brass spyglass to scope out the nearing landmass, his tongue sticking out as he did so."Yuki no Namida. We should hit the shore in about an hour and a half. I'm afraid that's all I know," said Reck, his navigator. An hour later the Victoria Punk was a flurry of activity, with all hands on deck ready to explore the unfamiliar territory. Everyone bundled up, the chill evident even before they set foot on dry land. The Captain himself buttoned up his large coat, teeth chattering already."Fuck my tits are freezing," Dive, a petite woman with pigtails complained, wrapping her small arms around herself."What tits?" Jaguar wheezed. A loud smack was delivered to the large man's head, quiet snickering and muffling laughter soon following.Stocking the ship would need to be done before they left in six days when the log pose set, but for now, it was time to enjoy the sights. The Kid Pirates comprised of thirty crewmembers, including himself. They alternated who got to explore an island first, with ten people receiving half a day out, five people guarding the ship while five explored before they switched. Kid hated to leave Vicky all by her lonesome. The other twenty were free to do as they pleased all day. Tomorrow the groups would change privileges. After separating supply money for later, Kid had Bubblegum, his treasurer, distribute some loot for everyone. After that, it only took fifteen minutes for the seasoned crew to get the ship port ready.Standing proudly atop the skull on his ship's bow, Kid addressed his people, "Alright you assholes, go have some damn fun, maybe find a body to keep warm with or some really good booze! No rules other than check back by nightfall!" Loud cheers met his declaration, his namaka dashing off, glad their Captain was finally in a good mood.With that thought in mind, Kid headed to what appeared to be a small town. A tavern was up ahead, the smell of alcohol and soft music giving it away. Killer, Heat, Wire, and Emma trailed after him, just as eager to get out of the cold. These were his top five commanders. The group chose a table near the back, Killer placing their order at the bar. "Just keep the refills coming till we leave," he grunted out to the rather frightened barkeep.A pretty brunette waitress dropped off their large order in a flash, shaking from head to toe, like some sniveling mouse, eager to scamper away. Kid scowled, slamming his glass of whiskey down, "Che. What a little bitch, can't even do her job properly."His men chuckled, greedily enjoying their drinks. "You don't think she was cute boss?" Heat asked, eyeing the timid woman.The redhead rolled his eyes. "Some chickenshit bitch? Naw, she'd probably faint before I even got within three feet of her," he waved dismissively."Well if you're not calling dibs, I think I'll try my luck with her," Emma winked, sauntering over to the bar, the cheers of her friends following her.That poor waitress, Killer thought, with a shake of his head, watching the girl blush at whatever Emma said.By the time night had fallen, Eustass Kid and his first mate were plastered, stumbling back to the ship drunk off their asses, singing off key, and leaning on one another. People always assumed Killer was the more level headed of the two, but they were best friends for a reason, being more alike than most people realized. Besides Kid hadn't sensed any powerful presence of the island and they all needed to unwind.Emma was just as drunk, her makeup smudged and hair tousled from her little make-out session. Heat and Wire weren't in much better shape. They barely made it to the deck, passing our slightly off to the side, snores escaping their mouths seemingly instantly.House and UK sighed, lugging their friends into their respective rooms. "Should've let these heavy bastards freeze to death," the large man grumbled."Fuck no, 'member the last time they got sick?! The Captain's a shithead to take care of. And don't get me started on Killer," House laughed loudly. "But honestly, its good to see him acting like himself again."Those nearby nodded their heads, several of them tipsy. The Kid Pirates worked hard and played even harder. With your life on the line, you may as well go big or go home.--------------------------------------------------Kid woke up with a start, his right arm grasping his pounding head. Shit, how much did I drink? Tutting to himself, he hefted his bulky body over to his in-suite bathroom to survey the damage. Smudged make-up and a grimy appearance greeted the tall man, who sighed. His Haki had sensed a commotion off in the distance, which is what jolted him awake, but with his hangover, he needed a minute to properly function. Some Irish coffee and a quick rinse off were in order. Hopping under the shower's spray, he got lost in his thoughts.The fight with the Red-Haired Pirates had one silver lining. That battle taught him how to sense others. In the haze of blood-loss and anger, his priority had been his crew, only finally passing out when he sensed them all nearby and the other pirates leaving. Kenbunshoku-Haki was damn useful.Toweling off his body and getting dressed, Kid headed to the gallery. Hopefully someone already had coffee going. I could feel rage and pleasure dripping off someone in the distance. It's intoxicating.Sitting down at his usual spot by he door, Hip rushed over with a steaming mug of coffee. "Here ya go boss," she said with a smile. Soon a full plate of eggs, sausage, toast, and fried potato patties greeted him.His crew informed him that whilst the island was small, it still had a medium sized naval base situated on the Western peninsula serving as a restocking hub. A marine ship had arrived in the wee hours of the morning. Whoever was fighting was targeting the marines. Some crazy bastard, he grinned to himself.Today was a a great deal warmer than yesterday, the snow having stopped sometime last night. The redheaded man sensed small flickers of light being extinguished by what felt like a bloodthirsty typhoon. "Looks like someone is having a party without us," he chuckled darkly, licking his lips. There weren't any ships in the harbor to indicate another crew, so what crazy fuck was rampaging on their own? Scarfing down a large breakfast left me feeling energized, all traces of the previous night gone. "You feel that shit Killer?"The masked man grunted in reply, still very much hungover and slurping food down through the holes of his mask. "Someone's been busy for a while now. That's some endurance," Kid whistled, abruptly standing and heading out to the deck.Purple sparks sizzled, electromagnetic pulses vaulting me forward to investigate. Vaguely, I heard Killer shout after me, but it was so rare to encounter a rage that mimicked my own. Flying high above the snow dusted treetops, I heard the cries of the damned well before I witnessed the carnage. The entire Eastern wall of the building was knocked over, the marines trying in vain to crowd behind the few stones left, firing with their rifles. Kid looked to where they aimed, spotting a small dude, wearing a long loose lab coat with a triangle shaped hood. A high collar masked the lower half of the guy's face and a pair of green googles covered their eyes. Said tiny fucker was punching the shit out his enemies, striking them in their throats, chests, and heads. One punch and the little shit is killing them?! That's one hell of an arm. Probably using precise blows, but still. He'd make a fine subordinate.A flurry of throws later, and it was quiet. "There's at least over two hundred bodies littering the ground Kid," said Killer, readying his Punishers just in case. Why does he have to go looking for trouble so early in the morning? Not everyone recovers from a hangover so quickly.The muscular man practically beamed, clutching his fist, "Yeah a base this size usually has about five hundred men. All I can feel is that shorty's power. What a fucking beast!"Wire's face grimaced more than usual, "He's going to invite that psycho to join our crew isn't he?"A sweat drop formed on Killer's mask. The blonde man knew that happy shit eating grin and greedy-eyed look anywhere. His Captain had found something he wanted. Such a child...Hopping down from their perch, Kid skidded several feet behind his newest find. "Yo midget!"Killer's sweat drop grew even larger. What a tactless asshole...A small head turned to the gaze up at the large redhead trudging ever nearer. "These are my corpses," hissed a high pitched voice, defensively putting their arms out. Why is a supernova on this island? There's jackshit here. "And I ain't no damn midget!"Now it was the Captain's turn to sweat drop. Fucking weirdo. "I don't want a bunch of dead asswipes. What do you need 'em for anyway?" he asked, genuinely curious."Research," was the single word response given with a huff.Kid turned around to face the four namaka that had currently caught up, his eyes sparkling even more. Wire sighed heavily. Dammit boss.A scientist? This was like winning the lottery. Not even all the bigshots had their own scientist. Hell he heard Caesar Clown sold his services to the highest bidder, meaning a good enough scientist was powerful enough to turn down a Yonko. Vinsmoke Judge ruled over Germa 66 in North Blue with his scientifically engineered army. Scientists were big shit. Don't know who this guy was, but he did just take out a whole base singlehandedly. Guess he's an up and comer just like me.Killer surveyed the carnage, surprised at how orderly the chaos was. A concentrated punch to the spinal cord or heart would end a life but that's an incredible level of precision. "Did you attack an entire naval base by yourself?""Do you see anybody else twat waffle?" a high pitched voice answered.Deciding to ignore the insult, the scythe wielding man sighed, "Why?" Taking on this entire base is lunacy. And it appears that the attack was unprovoked."Hate marines. These piss-ants are an affront to science. I see a marine, I collect a corpse, no exceptions," explained the squat man, crossing his arms over his chest."Even the doctors?" Heat asked softly, thinking a healer might be spared.A voice trembled in disbelief, "Especially the doctors. Why the fuck would I leave the government with such a valuable resource for its tyranny? I take from them the way they take from everyone---without a single fuck given."Eyebrows rose in response. "While I have no lost love for the marines, how are they an affront to science?"Never being one to pass up an opportunity to shit on the government, the little guy gleefully explained, "An educated populous would spell the end for the top dogs way of life so they keep people stupid. Why do you think books are so hard to find? And science? You have to join secret societies and follow all their dipshit rules for a single crumb of knowledge. All the information the World Government has is guarded with upmost secrecy. When they discover places where knowledge congregates, they destroy it. Ohara is the big one, but there's been several secret labs that have suffered the same fate. Thus science that they don't explicitly control is banned. And all the scientists that work for them are really just glorified slaves whose creations are used to wreak havoc and keep civilians licking at the soles of their boots. Now I'm no heroic do-gooder; that shit means nothing to me in the grand scheme of things, but I rather be dead than a government bitch. I conduct science for myself. They want to pick a fight with me fine, fuck it, all or nothing. Its not like they hold back against me, so I destroy all naval ships, bases, outposts, anything and everything. I'll gut a little recruit with no hesitation," proudly stated the scientist.Kid turned to his first-mate, the two silently communicating. This is our kind of people Killer. By this time, the others had made it to the occupied clearing, Emma catching them up quietly. They silently watched the scientist drag about fifty or so bodies into a pile before pulling a vial of deep blue liquid out of their lab coat, practically skipping over and dousing the mound. A few seconds later, the bodies convulsed and melted into a dark puddle.Mouths fell open and a few weaker willed people gagged. Captain Kid's grin grew larger, fascinated by the turn of events. Small purple gloves were raised into the air, as the guy's right hand turned some kind of knob on the end of his sleeves. The gloves cackled and dove right into the 'people jelly,' which began pulsing and condensing into a smaller and smaller mass."What in the fuck is he doing?" Hop murmured, slightly creeped out."I have no idea but its freaky as shit," Papas whispered, eyes glued to the spectacle.A few minutes pass and all that's left are dark purple crystals on the ground. "Just three, what a bunch of losers," the small body grumbled. Waste of my damn time. Hopefully I score at least a dozen of these suckers, otherwise I'm stuck at this shit-stain island for the time being.Faster than such a large man should be able to move, Kid snatched up a crystal holding it to the light. It felt ominous, no light making it sparkle. Just a deep void..."Put that down!" screeched the scientist, reaching for the stolen item.But Kid was tall, and lifted it just out of reach, with a smirk. "What is it?"Unbeknownst to him, he had done of the few things that really set this inventor off. Touching shit that you know nothing of. "I ain't telling you a damn thing. Now hand it over before you hurt yourself, you moron," the smaller of the two huffed. Why do all tall people pull that crap? I ought to shin kick him so hard.Amber eyes shot up, black lips curling into a snarl. Unlike his first-mate, insults didn't do over to well. "I don't think you know who you're talking to, you manner-less cocksucker," Kid's deep baritone growled, his ire rising.But the scientist was petty, with a childish streak a mile long. "I know exactly who you are, Used Ass Captain Kiddy," a high pitched voice teased. So what he's a big shot. I'm in no mood to be held up. This island is most likely a bust and I'm hungry. Either he leaves or he dies. I have no patience for bullshit.Mouths dropped out at the guy's taunt. That poor dumbass is dead, they all thought. Kid saw red, his amber eyes twitching. This disrespectful little shit! "Che, think you're funny, wise guy?""Yeah about as funny as your mug is ugly," the scientist jeered. I heard he's got quite the temper. I bet he's loads of fun. Kid's burgundy lips furled into a grimace. His partner in crime sighed. Our visit here started off so peaceful. "Kid scientist's are a different breed. They don't fight fairly. We don't know what that blue liquid will do to you. Drop it.""You should listen to girlfriend asshole," the scientist said, placing its hands on their hips in a taunting manner. Girlfriend?! Killer seethed, slipping on his arm guards.But something was off. That stance and tone made something clicked in Kid's brain. "You're a woman?!" he gasped. Fearless mouthy bitch.With a sigh and roll of her eyes, she answered, "And? I don't need a dick to whip someone into submission. What not going to fight me now?" the woman mocked. The crew's eyebrows' rose until they disappeared.Never one to shy away from a fight, a large metal hand rose in response, ready to crush that bitch like a bug. The woman grinned underneath her coat, quickly dodging and flashing right in front of his stupid face, punching the man directly in his throat. Kid's massive neck was thrown back, but he managed to remain upright. Color me impressed, that kills most bastards, she thought with a sadistic grin."Boss!" several voices shouted in alarm.As she readied herself for another throw, the sound of whirling blades interrupted her, her booted leg barely reaching out to block a strike from the tall shaggy blonde. She was pushed back quite a bit, having to flip away. "You were aiming to kill," grunted Killer angrily. Straight for the kill, no preamble. Vicious little thing she is."Well duh, you ass clown. How's it a victory if your opponent is still kicking?" I have work to do. Efficient kills are best. And you weren't aiming for any less, ya damn brute.Kid meanwhile was furious. Static electricity whizzed though the air, the long forgotten rifles of the marines shooting into the air and firing at will. It was too bad there wasn't much metal around. But the shots didn't pierce her body, the long coat acting as light weight armor. Instead to the devil-fruits user's chagrin, the bullets ricochet off her body. She's immune to bullets? I wonder if she's a fruit user? Pfft, well she can't dodge this, he figured, a large arm grabbing her by the scruff of her neck and slamming her head into the frosted terrain. "That hurt you cock-eyed bitch," huffed Kid, tilting his neck to pop it. What a punch, I couldn't breathe. Little bitch shouldn't be able to generate that much force.A few drops of blood dripped from under her now cracked goggles. She had been momentarily distracted by the gunfire to realize he snuck up on her. "You ogre!" she bellowed, rippling her goggles off, revealing deep brown almond eyes. God-dammit, he's worth every Beli of his ridiculous bounty. I can't even remember the last time someone made me bleed. Its been a minute since I had to use a weapon, but fuck it, this raging cunt is pushing my buttons.The lab coat she designed had several functions, one of which was the dispersal of force. So if an opponent hit her, a gel like substance contained between the specialized synthetic fibers help to protect the wearer by a margin of forty-two percent. Dropping the blow received down to only fifty-eight percent of total force exerted. That meant that this redheaded bully was insanely strong. What the fuck do they feed this colossal bastard?! Reaching into her pockets, a pair of royal blue knuckles were soon drawn.Kid smirked, calling on his power, only to be disappointed when they didn't come to him. A non-metallic alloy? Killer felt the bloodthirsty aura the woman emitted and decided to jump in, his blades swinging in the air. She was just as fast though, blocking both of his strikes, but in terms of raw power, he was stronger, pushing her down into the ground. The blonde moved to kick her with his right leg, only to be blocked by her left. Using her tiny size to her advantage, she hefted both feet onto his knee, balancing with one leg and kicking him in the stomach with the other. He grunted, that kick had hurt, but they were in a deadlock. At least they were until she started kicking his right flank repeatedly, aiming for the same spot each time. He never thought of a small stature as an advantage. Fucking hard to hit shrimp. She's going to break my ribs soon.A metal hand clamped over her skull pulling her backwards into a hard chest. Killer staggered back, clutching at his right side. The woman shrieked, the force on her cranium making her squirm. Kid smirked, a manic grin overtaking his features. The screams of an enemy got his blood going in exhilaration. He could feel her wrath practically oozing out. I'll squeeze till your skull pops. Scream some more.Grinding her teeth, she swung her right leg back aiming for his liver. A sharp intake of breath let her know she was successful. She took aim again making Kid's hold on her loosen just enough for her to twist her body, slipping away and landing roughly. Mother-fucker was going to crack my skull like a coconut.The small lady ran forward meeting a metal hand with her knuckles, the flame-headed man already recovered enough to throw down. Who gets moving after being kicked in the liver twice? Fucking monster man. She stretched her other arm up only to be stopped by his fleshy one. But that's the outcome she was counting on. Kid suddenly felt drained, his arm being pushed back. "They're some kind of Seastone!" he shouted angrily. Why are they blue then?She leaned forward and aimed a kick at the brute's head. He sunk down onto one knee, hissing out in pain. The crew was getting worried. As a rule, they never jumped into the fray when Kid and Killer were fighting. It was just too dangerous, but this psycho was something else. Heat decided to take the lead, fire spewing forth from his mouth, engulfing her body. Unfortunately for him, her coat was flame retardant, a necessity for conducting dangerous experiments. She hissed, and lunged at flamethrower's face, socking him right in the jaw. He fell onto his knees, blood trickling out of his mouth. She hits like a man.Just as she was bout to kick this blue-haired punks teeth in, a large katana swung down, narrowly missing her right arm. "Die you evil bitch!" Boogie shouted, getting into a battle stance. Several other weapons raised in response, their respective owners charging after the lone enemy. "Protect the Captain!" Breathing heavily, she swayed slightly, the fight having pushed her to more nefarious options.
There's too many of these damn clowns. Stronger than the marine fodder I just dealt with. Do I use my liquification serum or just the paralysis fumes? Some of them may be rare specimens worth using....I guess just the paralysis fumes for now. I can just kill them afterwards if they prove to be a disappointment. That redheaded bastard is going to suffer though.
Mind made up, she turned the dial on her left glove and shot out a cloudy mist. Luckily they were all fairly close to one another. The crew started coughing in pain, the smarter ones making an attempt to cover their faces with their hands or sleeves, but the particle size of the gas molecules could easily bypass such barriers. Won't do you any good, even if you hold your breath, she thought snidely.Kid, Killer, Wire, Emma, and Dive were the only ones to get away from the noxious fumes. "You no good bastard. What did you do them?" Emma shrieked, wanting desperately to check on her fallen comrades but not wanting to get caught up in the gas.Killer starting spinning his scythes, blowing the cloud away from everyone, praying it helped and that whenever she got them with wasn't fatal. This is why we don't fuck with shit we don't understand.Dive meanwhile shot forward, biting down on the scientists arm. "Who the fuck bites?!" she yelled, trying vainly to shake her arm free. What the hell are her teeth made of, steel?! Cunt-tastic day I'm having. These asshats have an answer to all my attacks. They're going to make have to resort to that. "Wanna play rough do you?" she giggled, a bit of mania leaking into her voice.That giggle made the skin on Kid's neck crawl. Something about this woman was off. Her skin bubbled, making Dive squeal and let go, the sensation burning the petite's woman's mouth. The lab coat, gloves, and boots fell to the forest floor and in its place an amorphous dark pink blob was bouncing.Kid scoffed, "What like I'm afraid of some jelly monster?" he laughed loudly, but before he could properly react, a jellied appendage shot out, engulfing his head, chocking him. He flailed wildly, trying to pull her away to no avail. He called forth all the discarded guns and formed them into a giant hand. But try as he might, the hand just got stuck in the jelly. When he pushed it down, intent on smashing the bitch, the jelly flattened, but just oozed upwards back at him. Fuck, she's immune to crushing.Sensing how dangerous she was in this form, Killer dashed forward only to have his blades imbed themselves in the sticky blob. Ripping his arms back, he prepared to attack again, but this time using his immense speed to produce soundwaves, a move which he hoped would make her splatter apart. He was rewarded with a wheeze as Kid gulped in air, the gelatinous monstrosity spread all over the ground.Wire hesitantly poked at a glob with his trident. "Think she's dead?""Good riddance. My mouth burns," complained Dive, sticking out her tongue. I need water!"You shouldn't put strange shit in your mouth then!" Wire shouted.The pigtailed woman frowned and started piling snow into her mouth. "DON'T EAT SNOW! ITS DIRTY YOU IDIOT!""But its helping..." she wailed, steam coming from her lips."That seemed like a last resort kind of move, so we should be alright," Emma reasoned with a sigh. She went over to her namaka, checking for a pulse from Heat. It was faint but there. She moved to look over another fallen member, hoping everyone was alright.Killer was hitting Kid on the back, forcing air back into the bulky man's lungs. "Nice job. Stupid bitch didn't stand a chance," the redhead congratulated. "Still kind of a shame, her power was cool as fuck."The blonde man sighed. He'd probably want her to join more now, if she was still amongst the living that is. Fucking giant child and his love of dangerous things. Next thing they knew the tiny bits of jelly had somehow grown in size, reforming into a giant version. "Its just a jelly monster, what's there to be afraid of," mimicked the massacre soldier to the annoyance of his Captain.Standing up slowly the duo prepared for another round with the other three flanking them. But this scientist was at her wits end. I am losing valuable time screwing around with these imbeciles. Their determination is commendable, but this is pissing me off. Using her size to distract her foes, her sticky body picked up her discarded gloves, and as her adversary's dashed forward she sprayed them right in the face with the same fumes that had gotten their friends. No getting away this time, she thought as the five of them fell over. Finally. Now where are my clothes?
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Kid didn't know how much time had passed, but he woke up to seeing the scientist a few feet away, grumbling to herself. Fuck only nine crystals. There's still some bodies left inside the base. And this damn fight cost me my goggles. Where am I going to get the materials to replace them on this shithole? she thought sadly, stuffing the damaged pair into her coat pocket.The pale man noticed all the marines were gone and the woman was back to her normal size wearing her lab coat again. His men were scattered about, all of them still. He had been moved over twenty feet away from anyone, his coat covered in snow. She dragged me though this gross snowy sludge. He sneezed.Delicate fingers twitched in anticipation. "Finally! Was wondering if your loser ass died," she goaded, turning around to the sound."Fuck you. What did you do to my namaka?!" He could still sense them but he had no idea what exactly this crazy fuck subjected them to. His body was heavy and from his face down position on the ground, it was a strain just to lift his head up.She skipped to stand over him, enjoying looking down on the giant of a man. "Nothing so far but now that those pretty eyes are open, the fun begins. I'll sort your men into two groups one to be done in the same way as those shitty marines and the more interesting ones to be dissected. Who knows, I may come across something useful.""You can take me, do whatever, but they didn't do shit to you," Captain Kid snapped. Just have to keep her distracted till I think of something. Fuck I can't move.The mad woman crouched down to the ground, lifting his head up in her palm. "You are in position to bargain. What I'm going leave them because they're helpless? I'm a criminal for fucks sake," she deadpanned.This woman was a monster. Vaguely he thought of the crew he impaled on crucifixes the second he made it to the New World. He hadn't listened to their pleas, said it was cowardly for them to expect mercy. Why should he expect it from anyone? Still he'd try and bargain for their sakes. It was a captain's duty to go down with his ship, not his crews. He had chosen to underestimate her because she was small, a costly mistake. Had I come out swinging, she'd be the one of the ground.Ripping his face out of her grasp, Kid said though clenched teeth, "I have treasure on my ship, just let them go.""Naw a pirate with loot on their ship, I'd have never known," her sarcastic voice filled the air. "I've seen your bounty; I should hope you have a nice stash on your ship. Was already planning on raiding it, the same way I would a marine ship. I don't leave evidence of my crimes Eustass Kid. No bodies, no bounty."Kid's eyes bulged out of his head as the implications of her cold words set in. He howled with rage, teeth gnashing, "I'll kill you! Get away from them!" His body struggled, the gas from earlier still holding him hostage.It was this that made her pause. He cares for them. This bozo shouldn't be coherent already. I'm actually surprised by how quickly he recovered. And he's moving...none of them should be and yet I can clearly see most of them twitching. They're fairly durable, probably a result of strenuous training. She studied the pirates vainly spasming on the ground, a greedy realization dawning in her eyes. He's motivating them. Whether by his concern or anger, he's motivating them to try their damnedest. Hmm, interesting. Might be worth an experiment, she thought joyfully, her mind concocting a cruel plan.Humming in excitement, she sprang up and quickly separated all the fallen pirates by a few feet, angling them in such a manner as to prevent them from seeing one another. Every time she touched one of them, they blinked up at her angrily, making an attempt to somehow hurt her. Their tenacity is astounding. Now hold still, I need the results to be blind, otherwise they don't count.She walked over to a random crewmember and squatted down, whispering with a mocking tone, "If I promise to leave your 'precious' namaka alive, will you agree to die slowly and painfully after swallowing one of newest inventions? I haven't had a chance to test it." Bubblegum, a tall man with spiky zigzag hair, stuck his tongue out, leaning towards the gloved hand holding a small yellow pill. No fear, no hesitation. "It will take a while. Goodbye," she muttered, dropping the pill into his mouth. Immediately his long limbs began to shudder, a silent strangled cry escaping his lips.Kid's eyes bulged out of his head, releasing an inhuman roar, the force of which caused her body to shake in bubbling excitement. Conquers Haki? Sweet fuck...I have to continue this now. I don't think I'll ever get the chance again. Six years I've searched for a group worthy of my skills. Six lonely years and hell I'd just about wrote it off as a lost cause. And these numskulls all took that blast without a flinch. I'd hate to see what they could do if they weren't paralyzed right now.Kid was a mess, that burst draining him even further, but still he tried to inch his way towards her. The litany of profanities and threats that he shouted would make a lesser being retreat. But it only encouraged this mad woman to press forward.The short woman righted herself and then posed the same offer to every crewmember, asking them softly to prevent the others from hearing. The only strange one had been Killer who stuck his tongue out of a hole in his mask, making her sweat drop.A few of them were able to use Haki to confirm that their friends were indeed still alive. For the ones that weren't, they only hoped the psychotic woman was being truthful, not being in any position to stop the mad woman and knowing she could easily force them to take whatever she wanted. A chance was better than nothing. Hearing the Captain though encouraged them that at least he was alive.Each person she disposed of caused Kid to shout out in anguish, believing she had killed them. Elation rose slowly, bubbling up to a positively demented grin in the woman's face. They all accepted the deal, praying against all logic I'd honor my words. They're brave, I'll give them that. Loyal as all hell too. Dumb as fuck though. Still the most formidable bunch I've come across so far. They might be good enough to consider..."You'll pay!" the large man screeched, tears rolling down his red eyes, his thoughts too jumbled to process.Crying? Ooh...tough enough to show his feelings. "Now now. Calm down, you big crybaby. I have some questions," she cooed."Why the hell would I answer you?!" the redhead shouted in disbelief, his mind whirling, trying to find a way out of this. What kind of shit luck do I have?! We just got over the battle with the Redhairs and now this? FUCK! Where's the fairness in life?! I'm sorry guys...So angry. So raw. So honest. It's beautiful. I suppose I should put him out of his misery already, but I like watching him suffer. She waited a few minutes, sadistically enjoying his torment. "No one's actually dead yet asshole. The gas I used only knocks them out and the pill I offered was the antidote to that coupled with a sleeping agent to facilitate the process. The spasms are just a temporary side effect. It will take awhile for them to regain full feeling of their limbs, but there's nothing wrong with them that wasn't already," she snickered, a dark twinge of madness sneaking in her tone. "Now down to business. Answer me and maybe if I like your responses I'll let them go," the small woman demanded.The pale man froze at her words, frantically trying to focus. Had he not been so preoccupied with fighting and being angry, he might have thought to check sooner. To his relief, they were all there. The guys are ok? "Then why the fuck did you have me believe they were dead," he grit out, embarrassed at his outburst. This evil ass cock-sucking goblin made me cry! She'll pay for each tear in blood."I'm an asshole," she answered honestly to his shock. "And I was conducting a social experiment," she said, telling them the deal she offered his crew. Part of him was angry she tormented them like that but another part of his was proud of the solidarity that existed within his crew.Kid stilled, willing himself to calm down for their sake. It took him several minutes. "What do you want to know?" Maybe I can distract her. Deep breathes. Don't think too hard.She plopped down crossed leg in front of him. "I've heard you use electromagnetism to built stuff. Why didn't you make any mech today besides that arm?" I would have loved to see what the jiki-jiki no mi is capable of."I need metal to work with idiot. Those little peashooters weren't enough to really do anything with," he answered automatically. What's she looking for?"Where'd you learn the engineering skills to do that?" That kind of natural talent is hard to come by. He's smarter than his oafish appearance suggests.A ghost of a smirk flashed on his face, "I'm self taught, trial and error. A few books I found here and there, harassing an old mechanic back home. Nothing fancy," he said flippantly while discreetly trying to flex his hands, forcing feeling back into his body. I'm going punch yer lights out.Smart enough to learn the complex math and nature of magnetism all on his own. What a rare find. Had he been paying attention, he'd have seen her eyes sparkle in greed. He's basically an engineer, although I doubt he considers himself one. Oh the things I could make with his help...She tapped a finger to her chin, "Hypothetically speaking if I left only you alive, what would you do about the One Piece?" I heard he kills people who laugh at his dream of finding it. I wonder how important it is to him.Captain Kid stiffened, wondering about the direction of this conversation. "I'd find it in their memory and shove every last piece so far down your gullet you shat gold."His seriousness coupled with the graphic response had the small woman cackling hysterically. "STOP LAUGHING AT ME YOU CUNT! I WILL FIND THE ONE PIECE!" he bellowed, another blast of Conquerors Haki following his proclamation.The mad scientist was stunned. He has the kind of will power to pull a blast that strong off twice? You just keep better and better... "I'm not laughing at your dream. A dream's a wonderful thing to have. What's life without a grand ambition anyway?" she said softly. "I'd never laugh at someone's goals; I've had idiots shit on my objectives. You're just kind of funny. I have a vivid imagination and well shitting out treasure..." she chortled."You're not right in the head are you?" he deadpanned."I'm not right anywhere. Least not by society's standards," she giggled madly.Kid was oddly silent after that. She took a moment to study him, crouching down closer to prod at him. Using her index finger, she poked him in his side. His muscles have muscles. This brute takes his training very seriously. Even his leg muscles are huge, she thought, leaning over him, grazing the back of his thigh. Its a dangerous world and so few bother to train their whole body. Fuck there are plenty of scientists, the so called genius's of the world, who don't bother to utilize every advantage they can.A blush took over his face, his ears and cheeks tinged red. "What the fuck are you doing?" his voice rose an octave. People did not touch him, especially without his say so. Woman typically ran and cowered from him and his crew. There were the brave ones. The village girls looking for a little excitement, a female pirate who thought she was the shit, and the whores who just wanted a good fuck and a nice sack of gold. Kid knew what it was. He was excitement to these woman, their bad boy, satisfying a craving, but the interaction was purely transactional, fulfilling a need and nothing more.He'd fuck 'em rough and then leave immediately afterwards. It always left him feeling out of sorts afterwards, but its not like a pirate could look for more. He'd be gone soon from whatever port is was, and there was no way he'd bring a non-combatant onboard, no matter her bedroom skills. It would be too much of a liability. Sexual touching was one thing but this tender, kind shit was too foreign. Sure platonic touching was different with his crew, but not with a damn stranger."Investigating.""Well quit it," he growled, uncomfortable with her closeness."Aw is the great big Captain Kid shy?" she teased."Shut-up! I don't like not being able to move damn it and this question and answer shit is pissing me off!" he yelled out angrily, not appreciating the vulnerable state he was in. God dammit, does she not know when to shut her mouth?!She rolled her eyes, sitting back down. "I'm almost done. You don't just rely on your devil fruit. Why?"Glad to not have her in his space anymore, the aggressive man grumbled, "What kind of moron does that? Opponents out here are serious business. 'Sides I need my strength to heft all the metal weapons I assemble. Yeah my power magnetizes it, but I lift it," he said in a bragging tone."You'd be surprised what kind of morons there are out here. I mean having a weak body is just asking for trouble but you should see the chicken legs on most pirates. They work their arms to wield a weapon and then neglect their leg muscles. Sure they may be fast, but why not be strong too? I know sheer amount of work it takes to be as toned as you are, but it's that hardiness that allowed you to survive my attacks."He blushed again, his whole face heating up. He handled compliments as well as he did insults. Before he could put his foot in his mouth, she asked, "Why did you approach me in the first place?"The angry captain took a deep calming breath, "I was woken up by a bloodthirsty fucker's pure rage and I'm always looking for more worthy members to join me. And then I saw you melt those weaklings into slush and it was interesting," he trailed off.She smiled, aware of how people perceived her powers. No one likes witnessing the liquification process. This bastard must be a little crazy too. "And you thought 'Yo midget' was a great way to start off a partnership?""Didn't know you were so sensitive," he said throwing a mocking glance up at her.Indignant, she grabbed roughly him by the chin and made him look up at her. "You took one of my hard earned crystals and raised it above my head you jackass. That 'what you gonna do about it short-shit' attitude pisses me the fuck off. You know how many mother-fuckers pull that crap and try to bully me into submission because I'm small?" she asked with a hiss. "Che like someone your size would ever understand how humiliating that is."She saw him wince as amber eyes met her own dark brown ones. "I didn't mean anything by it you whiny little shit. I just wanted to know what the hell you did. Those crystals were dope as fuck; I could sense power radiating off of 'em. Was curious is all." Sensitive about your size, he thought sardonically.He must still be in pain from the injuries I inflicted. I've already fixed myself up but I suppose I can extend the same curtsey to the ape. She pulled off her gloves revealing dainty hands with metallic blue nails. Reaching into her top coat pocket, she pulled out a small circular tub. "Hold still. This will alleviate the soreness from the hits I got in."He stiffened, the cool gel soothing the back of his neck. "I can do it myself," he grumbled.She scoffed, massaging the ointment in. "You can barely move. I guess I forgot to give you an antidote to the gas, not that you need it," the brown eyed woman fussed. When she was satisfied with that, she rolled him over effortlessly, moving to get the front of his neck and face. He's so pale I can see a perfect outline of my fist.Quincy can't turn me over without help. This woman is strong as fuck. "Why ya healing me? I could just attack you again," he asked, now able to move his arm pretty well."I'd like to think you're smarter than that. And I think you're actually deserving of the title of Captain if you still want a scientist." She gingerly dabbed at the bruise on his throat, making his whole face and neck flush crimson."Yeah I'd like a scientist, just not a nutjob like you," he said snidely, trying to deflect and not think about how good her ministrations felt.The small professor bit her lip, pessimistically replying, "People clamor for the genius but never want the insanity that comes with it. They say 'There is a fine line between genius and insanity' but that's not the case. True Genius is Madness, full-blown insanity, come what may. There are no lines left to cross."She sighed and moved higher, ghosting over his check. The woman was hovering in his personal space, making him feel like a spring wound too tightly. And the way she talked left him with no good response and too many thoughts."Stop that woman," he grabbed at her hand, pushing it away, glad at least his arms were working. "Already said you ain't joining," the buff man grumbled. Finally some movement. Damn her hand is tiny.Brown eyes narrowed. "Quit lying to yourself. And it's Professor Jam Inator, not woman." She finished with his face and then remembered the liver blows she gave him. He's already moving his arms? Goddamn. And no one turns down a scientist you idiot.But his mouth was already twitching into a grin, unable to help himself, "You turn into a jelly monster and your name is Jam?""You act like a child and your name is Kid?" the professor shot back."FUCK YOU!"She stared up with that godforsaken giggling again, delighted with his over the top reactions, which pissed him off to no end. Using his arms he righted himself into a sitting position to glare down at her. In disbelief she puffed her cheeks making the man grin until she stood up, placing her hands on her hips, now taller than he was. The smug expression she sported sent him overboard."Quit your shit!" he fumed, trying to will his legs into action to no avail."You started it you tampon head!" she yelled.His eyes narrowed as his blood began to boil. "Who the fuck you calling tampon head?!" Where does she come up with this shit?!"This moody bloody-hair colored bastard I'm looking at!" she said pointing at him childishly.He balled his fists and took a swipe at her, making her lean back and dodge. "And you expect to join my crew talking to me like that. Put some respect on my name," Kid demanded."Respect's a two way street, asshole," she glowered, deciding to let his infraction go as there was no real force behind his swing.Grumbling she sat back down, miffed he was rubbing his height in her face. Sighing, she dipped her fingers into the paste again, slipping her small hand under his vest at his lower abdomen. The surly pirate captain froze in disbelief. Like fucking Jekyll and Hyde this lass is."EH! What do you think you're doing?" He sensed neither fear nor disgust, but rather a sense of mild annoyance coming from the pint-sized woman. She confused him, aggravating him to his limit.Did his voice just crack? "I kicked you in your liver. I'm healing you. We've been over this you Neanderthal," she spoke slowly, in an insulting manner.He reached to stop her, his metal arm reflexively being stopped by her free one to his shock and horror. She did it so casually, his mind shut off for minute. "Cease your bellyaching, I'm done," she announced, rolling her eyes.When his brain restarted, she was already putting her gloves back on."You know initially I wanted a damn crew. But it just never worked. They either tried to order me about like a fucking slave, steal my inventions, or were just too complacent. No fire in their eyes. Nothing worth respecting ya know. I've had tons of offers but I ain't encountered anyone who merited following. Anyone can call themselves Captain, but few are actually competent enough to be one. You've impressed me and I can count on one hand the number of times that's happened. There must be more to you if you can inspire this level of fervent loyalty," she said, desperately wanting to unravel the mysteries behind the first person to stroke her curiosity in years.Kid tensed, crossing his arms over his chest. "Stop screwing with me," he seethed, willing himself not to redden. Do you ever shut-up?!She decided to ignore his tantrum, chalking his unease up to being angry at their initial encounter. But Jam never lingered on something for long. Her mind worked too fast and everything was expressed as it happened, fading away nearly as quickly. If she was angry she lashed out, happy she cried out in delight, sad she bellowed in agony, but then it was over. Sure there were a few things that preoccupied her from time to time, like revenge against a few spineless bastards, but his infractions against her were minor and he was just too valuable a potential resource to write off. The muscular man's eyes twitched in annoyance.Jam grinned, deciding to explain herself. "See I can't join a backstabbing crew, not with the kind of knowledge I have. That's why I tested you guys. In the face of death many a soul will plead to spare their lives, offering up even their own friends as collateral. 'Just please don't kill me," she mocked, making her voice sound pitiful. "It's pathetic how quickly they betray their own and if it's one thing I hate even more than a marine, it's a traitor," she bit out. One day I'll be in position to return the favor to every traitorous bastard I've met.Kid contemplated her words, knowing he felt the same way. "I handpicked each and every member of my crew. No one would dare betray me," he answered arrogantly, reflexively puffing out his chest.She nodded in assent, glad they saw eye to eye. "A traitor is the worse and I've been double-crossed more times than I care to admit," Jam said bitterly. Could be nice, not having to be a one woman army. Fuck I could conduct more experiments if I had someone reliable watching my back."I got a few requirements though. I need a space to conduct experiments and a bedroom, nothing fancy just a bed and a door I can close when I need to be alone. Don't touch shit without my say-so; I've killed for less and some things are deadly if handled incorrectly. My discoveries will be shared with you and yours, but not the world. The hell if any of my hard work ends up helping the government or my enemies. You do right by me and I'd be willing to let you make research requests, within reason. I'll fight under your mantle and go as far as to call you Captain. However, every shitty marine I lay my eyes on still dies a gruesome death. These are non-negotiable," she stated matter-of-factly, moving to stand."And how can I be sure you're trustworthy?" he asked, going over her prerequisites for being his subordinate. Research requests? Anything? His mind whirled at the possibilities. That's what really sold him on her. He wanted to be counted in the hierarchy of the big leagues. That's was the whole point in attacking Shanks. Having a scientist as his disposal was certainly a way to elevate his status. But she was a mixed bag of crazy, dangerous to the safety of his crew. Che, I can handle her, now that I know what I'm up against. But do I want that headache?She smiled softly, knowing she had him. "I could have just dumped a vial of liquification mix on you guys like I did the marines. If I wanted to fuck you over, I've had the chance. But its tiring working alone. I'm sure you split the work across your crew. Imagine if you had to do every little thing yourself?" she asked, never being one to hide how she felt.Amber eyes searched every inch of her, trying to decipher her true intentions. His Haki told him she was astonishingly lonely. So that's why she got all nice, the squirt wants some friends. Just as he was about to tease her, she threw him for a loop."Your people should wake up soon and I need to finish my work, so I'll go for now. Here I'll leave this for the yellow furball and the flamethrower. And this for your damn biter," she said handing over the stuff she healed him with along with a small green pill. "Tell her to let it dissolve in her mouth." He seized up, baffled by her consideration for his crew. She didn't have to heal him or them, but he was glad; those kicks Killer took looked painful.Faster than he could blink, she was off. "You have three days to make a decision Captain Kid. I'll swing by your ship then. Bye," she waved, trotting off."I said you ain't joining!" he hollered. This bitch was certifiably crazy. He felt like he had been taken on a emotional roller-coaster. He knew it was his problem, feeling just a tad too strongly about everything, but its just how he was. How he's always been. And this psycho professor's moods sat on a hairpin trigger. She would be like adding dynamite to hellfire. But she took out my entire crew with her damn inventions. A powerhouse like that could give us the edge. He watched her every move, as his more violent nature peaked through. I should gut her while her back is turned, make her pay, he thought before his more rational side took over. Everyone is fine, it's not worth the risk. Should've listened to Killer. I have no idea what other nasty tricks she has up her sleeves. No wonder scientists are so damn sought after. Her abilities are something else.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Contemplating his situation, Kid tried to move again, vainly wiggling his toes. A deep groan from Killer had the large man rushing to his partner's side, dragging his muscular body with his arms, his decision made. Feh, need to check on everyone first. "Killer, you good?" he whispered.The masked man stretched, grunting in pain. "Yeah, what in the hell happened?" he asked, blinking slowly behind his mask.Kid sighed, glad no one else was up yet. "I screwed up, but talked my way out of it. Creepy cunt asked some random-ass questions and then just started laughing. Like a loon Killer, like an absolute loon."Killer nodded, knowing how charismatic Kid could be when he wanted to be. "What exactly did she do to us?" he asked, popping his neck."That pill she gave you was the antidote to the shit we were all gassed with. Names Professor Jam Inator. She said everyone would be fine and gave me three days to decide if I wanted her to join. Told her to fuck off," he gloated, his grin splitting across his face.Killer's eyes twitched from behind his mask, reading between the lines. The redhead's lips said one thing but his eyes still gleamed in an insatiable way. Of course he's still considering the prospect of her joining. "Kid whoever she is, that woman's dangerous. I don't like the idea of being stuck on a ship with some unhinged bitch that has abilities beyond our understanding."The feeling in his legs started to come back, allowing the pale man to stand up properly. Studying his body, he realized other than feeling drained, he was fine. Coughing and sputtering alerted him to his subordinates slowly coming to. The loud sigh that left him was a weight off his shoulders. The Captain moved and lifted Killer up to a proper sitting position, causing the blonde to hiss in pain.The redhead looked off into the distance, sensing the woman's aura in the marine base. Wonder what she's up to? The usually talkative man, shifted from foot to foot, deciding how he wanted to tell his partner what he was thinking. It's not like he hid anything from Killer, it's just this was embarrassing to admit."Kid?" the massacre soldier asked, knowing a quiet captain often meant trouble.Crimson red hair shook, as the pale man sighed. "I'll tell you later, we need to check up on everyone first. Here, put this on your ribs then give it to Heat for his jaw and this pill to Dive for her mouth," said Kid, handing the items over to his second in command."What is it?" Killer asks skeptically, struggling to maintain his posture."Some healing shit. I don't know she used it on me and all the pain's gone though," he shrugged.A blonde eyebrow rose in response, not that anyone could see. "And you let her? Kid that could have been anything."The redhead huffed in annoyance. "It's not like I could stop her. Couldn't actually move, ya bastard. And it works," the paler of the two snarled, not liking having to admit for a second he was vulnerable.Killer sighed and began applying it to his side, wholly trusting his fearless leader's judgment. The feeling was cool and tingly but not unpleasant. In a matter of minutes he felt better. "Fuck."The muscular man snorted. "I know. She's a lunatic, a powerful monster woman with a shitty attitude, but her skill set is too valuable to ignore outright."The blonde huffed, following his captains' orders and helping his namaka. When everyone had woken up, Kid was bombarded with hugs, his subordinates having heard his pleas for their safety. "BOSS!" they sobbed, much to his outward disgruntlement and inner delight. "Off you mangy bastards!"He filled them in on a brief description of what happened after everyone was confirmed to be alright by his medics. But their boss loved giving details, so they all picked up his avoidance. Something happened....Still they were a rowdy bunch, and a discussion started on their potential new member. For now, their anger was still fresh."Fuck that slimy bitch. We don't need her!" yelled Hop."She's an insolent midget," complained Papas."She cheated her way to win," stated Wire."So she's a scientist; doesn't mean she's Vegapunk or anything special," mocked Disk J."A jelly monster named Jam? What a dumbass name," laughed Hip."I don't think mad scientists are used to taking orders. I mean why would they?" Whitney asked."I'd probably be full of myself too if I was that smart," said Compo."That punch of hers is no joke," Heat muttered."Boss would have won easily if there had been some metal around," defended Gig, to which everyone agreed."We have enough crazy aboard Vicky, we needn't add to the mix!" exclaimed Bubblegum."I don't know who she thinks she is, fucking with us like that," Jaguar shouted."Wait boss, she said three days? But the log pose takes six days to set and I don't think she got here before us," Boogie wondered."There were no ships in the harbor 'sides ours and this island only has one port of entry. How did she even get here?" asked Mosh."What in that healing stuff? I examined it, its top-notch," Pomp exclaimed, which Quincy nodded to. "It's smooth like butter and it even smells good," the doctor proclaimed."What the fuck kind of experiment was she conducting anyway?" House questioned."She had that blue melty chemical, a paralysis gas, and healing stuff. How much junk does she keep on her?" UK pondered.The mysteries just kept piling up, making Kid tense. This would probably be his only chance at having someone like her join. Free-lance scientists were a rare breed and if he looked at it objectively, the little Professor fit. She was a vicious, trash talking, authority-hating, lunatic. He couldn't ask for a better suited subordinate if he wished on a fucking star. But forgiving her insolence was something he struggled with. His blood boiled just thinking of the slurs that flew so casually from her mouth. His bit his lips, his preferred burgundy lipstick, staining his teeth like the blood he wished to make her bleed. Rotten bitch...Making their way back to the ship had everyone in a conflicting mood. Sure no one liked being tested but it was comforting that the bastards you sailed with would literally die for you. Killer, Hip, Skillet, Joplin, and Moai headed to the kitchen deciding to start making a late lunch. They worked in tandem, preparing a hearty feast. They knew their captain was afflicted with a cantankerous disposition and food always cheered him up. Everyone packed in the gallery, eagerly sitting down to enjoy a nice meal.Light chatter pervaded the area, everyone sneaking glances at their temperamental leader. While not as messy of an eater as some Supernovas, his plate was packed absurdly high with a nice helping of every dish prepared. Finishing his food in silence, he focused his Observation Haki, realizing Professor Inator was still somewhere in the vicinity of the marine headquarters. Maybe there is something special up at that base....He stood abruptly, stomping off. "Workshop," he grunted, before anyone could speak, the door to the gallery swinging open in his wake. His crew, completely used to his uneven temperament, sighed. His face was wonderfully expressive, giving himself away to those that knew him well. Their boss wanted a scientist, plain and simple. And he was mad he did. Especially after she insulted him so heinously and took them out. Still now that they knew what she was capable of, they firmly believed that the Captain could kick her ass. Not one Kid Pirate ever tried to stop their leader from doing as he pleased. His word was law on the Punk and he had a great intuition at selecting potential members."1000 Beli we get a new namaka.""1500 Beli he's already making a space for this scientist.""2000 Beli he harasses her in the next twenty-four hours.""2500 Beli he lugs the poor bitch here over his shoulders like a sack of potatoes.""2600 Beli he drags her.""3000 Beli....."Killer shook with silent laughter as the bets kept getting more ridiculous. He decided to give his Captain space for now, knowing it was best to let Kid sort of his thoughts before getting the full story. Like a good soup, the broth tasted best after simmering slowly for a few hours.Two hours later, just as the sun set, the blonde took a bottle of rum from the pantry and headed below deck. The ship had heard nonstop banging and clanging since their boss disappeared, the noise only punctuated by foul curse words and grumbles. Stopping to knock, a loud "I'm busy!" was shouted in annoyance.Killer sighed and pushed the door open anyway, reaching behind his head to pop off his mask. He uncorked the rum with his teeth and took a large swig before handing the bottle over to Kid.It was silent for a few minutes before the redhead began talking. Now Killer could see exactly what him in such a tizzy. This woman had inadvertently stumbled onto one of his partner's many malfunctions. To put it mildly, the brute had a praise kink. He loved attention and because so few acknowledged him, he flustered readily. That's not to say he couldn't detect false flattery and ignore that shit. However, genuine compliments unraveled him, leaving Kid exposed, like the delicate inner workings of a machine.And this scientist called him smart, hard-working, and worthy of the title Captain when she hadn't found anyone else. No wonder he was acting off. Kid was a mechanical genius but an emotional train wreck. The blonde doubted the woman meant anything by her remarks, but Kid always did read too much into everything. And the touches, however benign, had definitely not helped. Professor Inator is going to be nothing but trouble, the older man thought, resigning himself to her addition.In a contemplative mood himself, Killer glanced over what lay on Kid's desk. A schematic for a room... He's already designing a lab. Looking around he spotted a new large metal table, two metal cabinets, and a desk. The pieces were well made, with lots of little drawers and fine details. Turning around he found a soldering iron, a few motherboards, and copious amounts of wires lying about. There were so many little parts, a tornado of junk if you were anyone but his best friend.The older man snickered. Kid narrowed his eyes, pouting. "No just preparing. In case we come to an accord. I thought maybe we go interrogate her some more and see if she's deserving of sailing as a Kid Pirate. Just us though. I won't take her on if you're against it, but this may be the only scientist we come across," the burly redhead said, putting down a wrench."And you really want to know what she was doing?" Killer asked with knowing electric blue eyes. Nosier than a damn cat.The taller of the two snorted and stomped his foot. "Don't you? Those knucklers were Seastone but they felt off. And she turned into a giant jelly monster. You're not the least bit curious?" he questioned, raising a non-existent brow.Taking a swig, Killer hummed, "Of course I am. She took the dead and compressed them into gems. Who wouldn't be interested?""Then tomorrow after breakfast, we'll corner the good professor for a nice chat," the brute grinned.Killer shook his head. "Maybe you should try and be less of a douchebag.""Psst, I charmed her into wanting to join my crew," the younger man boasted."Whatever little charm you possess only worked because she's got a few screws loose," the blonde joked, being the only one able to banter with the angry man.Kid huffed, standing tall. "I'm charismatic as hell. Woman beg for my attention."The long haired man snorted. "Just don't stick your dick in crazy," he warned.The Captain blushed heavily at the implication. Who says I wanna?! "I ain't that horny! She's some kind of jelly jam thing. Probably ugly as fuck under that lab coat. Why else would a woman cover from head to toe?" he waved off his friend's concerns dismissively."Kid you'd fuck a barrel if it had a hole the right size. 'Sides that Jelly was nice and sticky," said Killer, egging his partner on."Shut-up ya sick fuck!"The two old friends dissolved into fits of laughter, chugging the bottle of rum until dinner time. Kid's laugh loud and hearty, Killer's a murmured rumble. He laughs just fine; I wish he would just let go.The ship wound down after supper. A few pirates left the ship for some nighttime activities, while most just went to bed, tired from their ordeal earlier in the day. Emma winked at her friends, having decided to go bother that cutie from the night before."That whore-bag," Dive laughed."Emma's just a greedy bitch with an itch," Jaguar snickered, watching their most perverted member barrel down the road to the bar.Chortles followed their discussion.----------------------------------The next morning, Kid was woken up by the delicious smell of blueberry pancakes. Hurriedly getting ready for the day, he slammed his cabin door open and dashed to the gallery, Skillet's pancakes smelling mouth-watering. Stacking a plate as high as it would go and adding butter, he greedily started eating. A mug of coffee was slid in his direction by Heat, also a big pancake fan. A giant ten egg, bacon and cheese omelet with green onions and tomatoes was plopped in front of him by Moai. Nodding his appreciation, that too was soon demolished.Killer was reading the paper, sipping his coffee though a straw. But Kid hadn't heard a News Coo caw, so where did it come from? Killer slid the paper over, pointing at an article: 'A mysterious marine killing gremlin complete with a badly drawn shapeless blob with angry eyes and large spiky teeth."That doodle looks like a potato with teeth and stick arms," Wire concluded, the usually dour man trying not to laugh."So.... a potato gremlin?" Hip asked, with a smirk.Dark roaring laughter filled the gallery, the paper being passed around for everyone to see.When the laughter subsided, Killer explained, "It's an issue from two months prior, but I've seen other reports of marine bases and ships just disappearing over the years. The government just had no idea of the identity of the perpetrator. Two months ago, a civilian on a merchant ship reported he saw a tiny gremlin sinking a marine ship though his scope. Said it had the laugh of Satan and gave him nightmares."Papas shuddered. "Yeah that cackle wasn't sane."Kid whistled in appreciation, licking his lips. "Man she was kidding 'bout hatin' the Government. Bring the paper you damn pack rat. Let's go visit this potato gremlin; I've got questions," he chuckled, his laugh not so sane either. No bounty? Just wanted...that's suspicious as fuck.Killer snickered and got up, following his best friend off the ship.As soon as the crew was sure the duo was gone, the bets started up again.------------------------------------------------------Law hates bread ergo Kid should love bread and all bread like products, such as pancakes. His favorite food is cabbage rolls, and like Luffy I don't believe he's picky (they ate jail food with gusto), but I think he has more adult tastes (more complex flavor mixtures). I think Luffy enjoys simpler dishes, as a child with a simple palate would, whereas Kid enjoys full on hearty meals. Luffy sunny side up egg with mayonnaise per the SBS; Kid omelet with meat, cheese, and some veggies. Now if push comes to shove, they'll both eat anything offered, but if they have their pick, these are my headcannons. He's also Scottish so lots of root vegetables and tons of heavy meat dishes.I firmly believe he enjoys building things. There are several different mechs he builds in the fight against Big Mom and in the cover story request chapter 1012, he built a very realistic eagle-like bird. While wearing overalls. He's such a cutie. So yeah he loves to tinker. And the bird has an 81 on it so I believe he has at least that many different mechs built before. Tis impressive. Now Oda chooses which of those requests to draw so I take it as cannon, because he wouldn't draw something that goes against how he pictures the characters to be. Especially since he put so much effort into his character designs.Dissecting that image, he definitely doesn't seem like some overly cruel monster. There are baby birds nesting in his hair! And the bird he's building looks like it's for their protection/benefit. He is still a pirate; you get in his way you die. I do think he's killed civilians, but just because someone's not a pirate doesn't mean they're good. I don't believe he goes after random innocent people for the hell of it, just doesn't give people a pass because of their status. A shithead is shithead. Collateral damage is also a thing.I will be keeping him crazy and violent towards enemies, that's part of his appeal. He is a bully, able to dish out insults, but not so good taking them. Laughing at him or his people sets him off, so still not a good guy, just not as dark and fucked up as plenty of the fandom seems to pigeon-hole him as. I've read some scary shit on here. The insults he spat at Law and Luffy in Wano were normal banter, not the ravings of a deranged psychopath. The fandom is demented....As for his crew, all we know for sure is they are extremely loyal and care greatly about their captain's well being. When Kid decided to jump off the waterfall in Wano no one bats an eye, used to his antics, and probably just as crazy. So if he wants to add a new member, they're getting a new member. As for individual characters, I will be giving them all a defined personality.I'm an action/adventure, humor, sci-fi, romance writer. I like the funny and while I delve into the dark, I don't just linger there. I believe in balance. That's why I like One Piece. It gets really dark but there's always some silly parts a moment away. Now review so I can prove Kid can be just as popular as the other two of the Supernova trio. I know he's not, but the hell if I'll stop trying!
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I needed a character sheet. We have 22 of the 31 Kid pirates, with 6 of them being woman. That breaks down to roughly a third of his crew and I like evenness so ten ladies, twenty men, and one grumpy captain. I kept with the music theme and had some fun. Now I know there are two Kid Pirate members drawn in the anime but not the manga. I gave them names and tasks. I know the fandom calls them something....but I do me.1. Joplin: Average woman 5'6" short pink hair, cooks (fancy cheeses and exotic cuisine), wields a mace. Sassy. Purple eyes. Wears jeans and tank tops. Over protective personality. Loves fresh fruit. (Age: 20)2. Snare: 6'11" Heavyset man, tall, blonde mohawk with face tattoos (in the anime at Saboady), sews, makes up clothing designs with Hop, brawler. Naughty. Collects stamps. Is Gay. (Age: 28)3. Forte: Skinny man, pointed face, 6'0" musician, Base guitar, wields a cutlass. Cruel. Formal. Enjoys spa days. Likes to read mystery horror books. Haughty. Wears ruffled shirt and billowy black pants. (Age: 34)4. Whitney: Pretty musician singer, piano player 5'8" Dark skinned. Bright blue eyes. Devil fruit user. Kick based attacks with steel toe boots. Relaxed. Likes poetry. Styles the crews hair with Hop. Has a curly afro—hairstyle changes based on her mood. (Age: 26)4. Jam: 4'11" Short woman, mad scientist, Inventor, sharp and pointy aficionado, poison and medicine maker. Petty. Spoiled. Foul. Fights with luchador/ wrestling moves and extremely acute hits. Loves lace. Very naughty. A teaser not a pleaser. (Age: 24)6. Alt: Skinny man, orange mohawk, 6'2" wears white fluffy coat (in anime at Saboady) Bartends, Gunslinger. Gossip. Fancy pants. Sings wonderfully---is shy. Gay. (Age: 29)7. Thrill: Muscular man 5'10" Long black dreads. Helmsman, giant axe wielder. Party King. Loves to dance. Comic book collector. Beautiful hazel eyes. (Age: 22)8. Clash: Tall thicker woman. 6'3" Loves cleaning and organization. Secretary of ship. Grey-eyes. Wields claymore. Long purple hair in a braid. Pragmatic but violent. Knows how to torture a person for information. Plays a cello. (Age: 31)9. Skillet: Short man 5'7" pastry chef/baker, wields giant metal hammer. Green hair man-bun and tanned skin. People Pleaser. Likes board games. Plays the harmonica. (Age: 21)-------------------------------10. House: 5'4' Petite, Green eyes, Curses people, ship mom, makes soaps/beauty products. Wields ninjato. Wild light blue hair styled into horns. Kind. Into astrology. Peacekeeper. (Age: 26)11. Hip: 5' 7' Average height, dark tan skinned, short light blonde hair, cooks specialty soups, stews, and vegetable side dishes, wields two short swords, sister of Hop. Does the crew nails/nail art. Sneaky. Worrywart. Vegetarian. Animal Lover. Quick on her feet. Loves band t-shirts. (Age: 23)12. Hop: 6' 0' Tall woman, fashionista, hairstylist, Make-up guru, long light blonde hair in high ponytail, wields long sword, older sister of Hip. Defends sister; argumentative. Secret Romantic. Is bisexual. (Age: 25)13. Dive: 4'9" Petite, large braided pigtails, Biter, lookout/scout. Has throwing knifes. Mischievous. Silly. Keen observer of other people; oblivious to her own bullshit. (Age: 21)14. Emma: 5'8"Average height, light colored mohawk, Resident pervert, information gather, gossiper, wields crossbow. Likes to tease crewmates/wreak havoc. Sometimes goes too far. Can play an electric guitar. Lesbian. (Age: 28)15. Quincy: 5' 11" Tall, skinny, puffy orange curly hair, wears elaborate crown with a cross on top. Uses pink lipstick. Doctor. Wields Odachi. Practical. Acts mature is not mature. Loves bows. Pouty. Loves to read spicy romance novels. Can play the trumpet. (Age: 29)----------------------------16. Killer: 6' 5.5" Cooks, specialty pastas. First mate; historian, plays drums. Wields Punishers. Intelligent. Sadistic. Goofy. Loves kitchen appliances and cook books. (Age: 27)17. UK: 5' 11"Average man, red haired mohawk, beer gut. Shipwright, wields saber. Gruff. No-nonsense. Blunt. Smokes. Builds furniture. Likes snacking and drinking. Enjoys nature walks. Wears fishnet leotard and a skirt. Loves fishnet stockings. Surprisingly straight. (Age: 31)18. Pomp: 5' 3" Short stocky man, Field medic, bomb maker and user. Blunt, very skilled. A flirt. Bright Blonde hair with long left side bang. Plays the electric keyboard. Flashy lover of explosions. (Age: 27)19. Papas: 5'10"Average height, light-skinned, wears sleeveless hoodie and sunglasses at night. Supply gatherer, information trader, wields scimitar. Intelligent. Always cold. Loves sweets. Muscular arms and a pointed nose. Plays a tambourine. (Age: 20)20. Disk J: 5' 5" Stocky man. DJ and party planner. Wields rapier. Snarky comeback King. Spiky pale pink hair. Knows a fair bit about electronics as he does the ship's audio devices.(Age: 21)21. Jaguar: 6'7" Tall muscular man, Boxer, Hunter. Also has machete. Playful. Goofy. Deep black eyes. Orange hair pulled into puffy ponytail. Very picky eater, likes plainer dishes. Teases who he is attracted to. (Age: 22)22. Wire: 9' 2" Commander oversee task distribution will poke shitheads with trident for motivation. Like to paint/draw. Artistic, old soul. Dark black hair. Makes the best coffee. Deep soft voice. Pansexual. Loves to shop especially for accessories. (Age: 27)23. Heat: 7' 4" Commander assigns tasks, weapons storeroom attendant, lights shit on fire, dual swords. Macabre dry humor. Loves cute things. Gravely deep voice. Level headed. (Age: 26)24. Compo: 8' 6" Large muscular man. Fisherman, takes care of aquarium. Wields spear. Quiet. Calm. Gentle giant. Bandana covering short brown hair. Plays a mean saxophone. (Age:32)25. Boogie: 6' 2" Screamer singer front man, glass blower, wields Katana. Loud, quick. Likes to play jokes/pranks. Light sea-foam green hair, covers half of face. Emotional. Wears black lipstick, a striped shirt and pink shorts. Bisexual. (Age: 23)26. Moai: 6' 5" Large man with tanned skin. Cooks (Meat and potato dishes, loves spices) Wields Dao. Curious. Wears silver hoop earrings and a beaded necklace. Loves jewelry. Dances while cooking. Short tempered. Long lavender fluffy hair pulled into ponytail covered by yellow spotted bandana. Can play a harp and if you laugh, you die. (Age: 30)27. Gig: 7' 7" Obese hand to hand combatant, Tall, handles cannons/upkeep. Like to gamble/play cards. Reserved—does not trust easily. Black liberty spikes. Can play a tuba. (Age: 34)28. Reck: 6'0" Slim man with dark blue curly hair. Navigator. Wields dual flintlock pistols. Diva behavior. Likes eyeliners. Loves fancy wine. Plays a bass guitar. (Age: 27)29. Mosh: 16' 3" Incredibly tall--Jean Bart sized, muscular, long magenta ponytail, plays lead guitar, Tans hides/leather, wields katana with long handle. Serious. Fearless. Quick to defend his crew. (Age: 29)30. Bubblegum: 6' 2" Tall lanky man, zigzag spiky dark blue/purple hair, Treasurer, wields saber, loves robots. Dorky. Greedy. Institutive. Chatterbox. (Age: 24)31. Eustass Captain Kid: Boss of the ship. Mechanical engineer for the ship. Personally designed Killer's punishers and helped fellow crewmates with selecting a suitable weapon. 6'8.5" Bully, egotistical, violent, lover of weapons and music, greedy eater, horny as hell, childish, smack-talker extraordinaire. (Age: 23)Just some quick info I made up using the doodles Oda made and my imagination. I made up all the ages but I headcannon them as being relatively close because several of them come from the same island and were part of each other's street gangs----street children banding together for safety. Kid makes mechs and I'm positive he constructs plenty of other things so I gave the rest of his crew art related hobbies that I think would come in handy on ship. Those outfits look custom....they scream millennial making their own emo/punk/goth/rock outfit. All they're missing is the soda tab jewelry. That aesthetic aside, it's probably hard to get everything they need when they pull up to smaller islands and such. I can't remember if it's an SBS or datebook but Nami says Chopper makes them beauty creams and such. So clearly pirates have to be industrious.
The blonde on the left in unknown. But Wire, Killer, Kid, Snare, Alt (Haikei), and Heat. Can't identify the last guy on the right.
UK, Pomp, and Bubblegum.
Moai, Papas, Mosh, Hip, and Quincy.
Boogie, Mosh, Reck, and Hip ready to defend their captain. You can see the eye makeup on these guys! And Hip has two swords!
House in Episode 1067. I really like her horns. And the goggles! A friend gifted me Whitney! She's so pretty!
I'll update this as the story progresses, probably having to change heights and hair colors. The weapons too, though some were drawn in the manga. Just not all. Wano was so clearly very rushed. I think Oda intended to do more, because with the bounties matching he’s is trying to convey that the three supernovas are equal. It just doesn’t feel that way without knowing exactly what the Kid Pirates have been up to in the two year time skip. Law already got a nice story arc so here’s to hoping Kid gets something in Elbaf.Gods I want to know what is going on with Law and Blackbeard and Kid and Shanks. The suspense is killing me. I’ve had two friends tell me my babies are going to die and its put me in a mood. So I might of told them well he can’t be Strawhat Luffy if he returns the hat…so maybe there needs to be a way he doesn’t have to return that damn hat. As always boo to Shanks, he probably has a bartender lady and a child wanting to join his crew at every port. Disloyal to Makino and Luffy---for shame. Dishonor on him, dishonor on his ship, dishonor on his rabid monkey…Concerning the potential relationship between Kid and Jam: he is fascinated by her; she’s new and with the Victoria Backstory in the SBS I believe he has a thing for bossy, tough woman. He is also disgruntled by that fact---bad with emotions this Capricorn man is. He’s attracted to her power and being a sex-fiend (his animal resemblance is a bull, the symbol for male sexuality and sensuality), he has constant naughty thoughts. I mean have you seen him in that beast pirate uniform? Horns and leather? Oda’s a freak. I’m thankful though. That blush--- I think he was embarrassed as hell. The bull also represents wealth, ambition, loyal friendship, stamina, strength, power, stubbornness, and hard work. The word bull is often used to describe a bulky muscular man. Rather fitting. Go Oda. Jam is an OC. Another author called her a Mary-Sue and gods have I not laughed so hard. I get she beat the crew in the first chapter, but she won by cheating. She’s a slippery little twat. And while she is physically strong, she only beat Kid due to the element of surprise and him not considering her a serious threat. She literally poisoned the air. It was a cheap trick. She is a competent fighter, but her abilities do have pitfalls. Jam just hasn’t revealed them yet; like she just met these guys, there is no way she’s telling them her weak spots in case she needs to bail on them. She has plenty of flaws and will not be well received by many canon characters---she’s a lunatic with a skewed moral compass who enjoys rubbing her intelligence into other people’s faces. The only ones who will like her for her are the band of weirdoes she joined, and it will take time for all of them to come around. Fuck Kid hasn’t even forgiven her for their initial meeting. He’ll get her back; he is too egotistical not to. He’s just playing nice because he sees her as useful. I know it shouldn’t bother me but when one author disparages another it makes me irrationally upset. We need more authors not less and so many quit when others insult them. If you don’t enjoy a writer’s work, stop reading it and don’t make passive aggressive remarks. No one will steal my sunshine and rain on my crazy parade. I have around seventy fleshed out characters I keep in a journal and I find it a nice challenge to place them in a relevant universe, purely for my enjoyment. Thrill, Skillet, and Clash are actually from my collection; I just tweaked their names to match the Kid Pirate aesthetic. The others I made up on the fly. I’m debating illustrating them—I think it’s good to let the readers picture the characters as they see fit—it helps with the immersion. Plus my drawing skills are seriously lacking. On a lighter note chapter four is almost done. I’ve noticed the chapters here are relatively short…do people like shorter chapters? Because I always feel cheated.
Also 1078 spoilers:
-------------------------------------------------------------- I think York has every right to be upset by the station she serves. Pooping for six other people and stuffing yourself to a BMI of 600? Gross. Does Oda have a weird vore fetish because that was a strange thing to write? I can see why she turned traitor. 100 warships and an incident greater than Ohara?! Ooh Egghead is getting interesting! And we got to see Bonney for a second. Yay she’s alive!Thank-you for the Kudos and comments!
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Spoilers for 1079 will be at the end!
Jam sighed, working diligently at assembling a new dehydrator, a machine she used most often for her experiments. Marine bases served as a plethora of valuable resources. Plenty of weapons, appliances, and medical equipment could easily be repurposed for her needs, most things serving as part donators.After she left that redheaded brute, Professor Inator had gone to retrieve the bodies she left behind. She got another seven crystals for a total of fifteen. I guess even the fodder in the New World is tougher.She found the data room easily enough and it's not like it was particularly hard to kick the doors in. So many pirates got into bases and so few were smart enough to make use of the governments many available resources. Dumbasses.The room was filled with books and file cabinets as far as the eye could see. This was a restocking base making it brimming with supplies, but sadly lacking in any important information. So not a base they conduct experiments at. And I was so hopeful with this being a secluded island and having a larger base than necessary. Fuck titties.But there had been a few nice surprises. The tiny woman had been grateful to find the items necessary to repair her goggles, cursing Captain Twat-tard the entire time she fixed them. He seemed the impatient type, I bet Beli I see him soon. Ooh a proper area to store chemicals and other evil things! she squealed internally, dreaming of a laboratory.Accessing the pirate database the marine's kept, she thumbed though to check the entirety of the Kid Pirates dossier. She had skimmed the members of Worst Generation files before, to know them at a surface level in case she ran into them. Eating some sandwiches she swiped from the mess hall, Jam sat down and read all about their exploits in detail. Somebody's been a naughty boy, just look at this rap sheet. He's a right and proper pirate alright. Guess we won't have any hang-ups about my methods. Good good, this I can work with.And the crew...plenty of heavy hitters. I bet people run from the sight of these bastards. Unlike how they treat my short ass like I'm no threat at all. Well it does make it easy to sneak in bases. Still what kind of mad scientist can't inspire fear? Its not fair. Lucky tall-ass clown, aren't you Kid? He even looks menacing, she thought with an angry pout.Oh my god, she pulled up a previous wanted poster. Him and the masked fluff head were so scrawny in comparison to what they are now. God if I thought he was pale now, he looked like a vampire before. Those tacky gold spikes on that coat. And those gaudy ugly bracelets. He looks like Count Pimp. All he needs is a cane. What a goofball! Oh Killer polka dots on a pirate with a popped collar. Are his pants ass-less fringed chaps? She was dying, uncontrollable laughter making her tear up.She went further back and discovered he stated his journey at age seventeen. Oh if she thought the last picture was bad. She spent quite some time laughing.It seems he began his Pirate career in South Blue with Killer, Heat, and Wire. You can still see the baby fat on these boys. Eccentric styles seem to be their thing. A surprising number of woman; good he's no sexist and I won't be the only one on board. That'd be weird. An hour later, she finished her task and had memorized the names and faces of all the crew. Stretching she decided to go looting for the things a pirate may like.Going from room to room she found wall safes and secret stashes, swiping anything of value. Treasure was her main concern, things could get expensive, but she also took any equipment she could repurpose, any liquor she came across, weapons, and general supplies. It took most of the day to situate all the good stuff on the first floor in a room by the hole she tore in the building. Might as well take everything before I destroy this place. Plus I bet it would make that tulip-head happy. It's been so long since I've done this people thing....oh well who doesn't like free shit?Soon the sun was setting and hunger crept in. "Feh, I'll have to cook. I hate cooking," she grumbled, heading to the kitchen to prepare her own dinner. I should just make a bunch so I don't have to fuck with this tomorrow. Dinner was a silent affair as she munched and drew her dream lab, wondering how accommodating she could get that oaf to be. One of my more destructive inventions ought to get him excited enough to get me what I want.------------------------------------Jam worked into the wee hours of the morning dissembling things for parts and separating them by type. I'll have to make a trip to the forest soon. Need to dehydrate some plants for medicine and chemical compounds. There was a basic setup in their infirmary for pharmaceutical construction. I could use it to distill the powered plants and hopefully refine them. I'm going to require a more advanced arrangement to get the purity levels I want, but for now, this shitty apparatus will have to do.It was getting late; the clock read 3:36 a.m. Guess I should sleep and start up in the morning. She found a bedroom and made herself comfy after taking a quick rinse off. Being exhausted was really the only way her mind shut off enough to pass out.----------------------------------------------Kid and Killer made it to the base fairly quickly, at half past ten. Luckily Jam had woken up about an hour prior and was getting ready to leave, a few large satchels draped over her arms. Just as she was exiting her makeshift bedroom, the two came barreling down the hall.She smiled under her collar, fully dressed in her lab coat. Back so soon? I knew you were impatient as hell. "Good morning," she chirped, looking up at the two tall men.A pale arm shoved a newspaper to her face with glee, "A potato-gremlin? This you?"Her eyebrow twitched in annoyance. "I ain't no damn gremlin!" she barked, scanning the article, remembering the ship from two months back. "Yeah this is my handiwork. I knew I should've sank that merchant ship," she muttered, glad they didn't get a photo."We have questions. Lots of questions," Killer said ominously, his arms crossed over his massive chest.She had expected this. Turning around, the small woman headed into her make shift lab and sat in the desk chair by the large bookcase. Her two guests choose to stand, towering over her, even though there were other chairs available. Are they seriously trying to intimidate me with their size? Idiots. The scientist leaned forward, her hands meshed together out in front of her, "Well?" she drawled.Kid smirked, curious about her exploits. "Why is there no bounty?"Jam giggled, "Ah, because the navy didn't give its permission for this article. Big News Morgan did. The government doesn't want to be seen as incompetent and not knowing who is behind a string of losses isn't something they're going to make public willingly. So no bounty," she replied, bouncing on her feet, pleased with herself.The duo exchanged glances, intrigued. "No bodies, no bounty," Kid recalled. "Why wouldn't you want a bounty?" I love when mine goes up."The Government has a research division called The Special Science Group or SSG for short. It's lead by Dr. Vegapunk and made up of over a hundred scientists in all fields of study. See if you're a scientist, they take you there. Sure they make it seem like a deal. Safety, grant money, housing, access to their massive library, but you're a prisoner and the tech you construct is used for two principal demands: weapons for the government and catering to the demands of the filthy rich. It's barf worthy. So the less they know of me, the better," she concluded with a frown. The fuck if I'm making toys for spoiled rich assholes ever again."But by joining a pirate group aren't you going to attract attention?" the masked soldier spoke up.A gloved hand waved dismissively. "Naw. It's not like I'm going to advertise I'm a scientist and no one would find it credible that a scientist is traveling aboard a rookie pirate ship. And being small, they'll credit most of my feats to other members."Kid nodded his head, moving on. "The jelly monster. Just what the fuck are you?" he asked rudely. Killer had to refrain from sighing.Brown eyes narrowed behind purple goggles, "I'm human if that's what you're asking," she snapped before continuing, "I've modified my body to turn into that when necessary. The cell structure breaks down and leaves me an amorphous blob. It makes me impervious to most forms of attack and able to control my shape at will. I sometimes use it play dead when I get in over my head," she explained, leaning back in the chair.Blonde hair swayed, looking her over, "Play dead?""I pretend they killed me by splattering, and then wait till they leave to reform. I did it to you guys till I figured out the best course of action," Jam said, deciding to leave out how much it tires her out to do so."How did you just get bigger? You can't just increase mass like that," Kid said, getting comfortable and leaning on the desk.Ah so you understand some scientific laws then. Good, I'm not calling some dolt captain. "I absorbed the snow. It was all water weight. Still it does make me stronger and it scares people shitless," Professor Inator snickered."So it's not a devil fruit?" the first-mate questioned, wanting to know if he had another hammer to watch out for.The scientist shook her head. "No, I can still swim. All my abilities result from my scientific prowess," she explained. I love swimming too much to give it up."Those Seastone knuckles, why are they blue?" The muscular man asked, curious what they were comprised of.The short woman perked up, leaning forward. "They aren't regular Seastone. Items made of Seastone have a purity level. The higher it is, the stronger the effect on a devil fruit user. I purified it over and over and added crushed blue pearls to the mixture. I found that blue pearls mimic the seas power and it made them pretty. That dull grey was hideous," she complained, crossing her arms.Kid snorted in disbelief. Fucking woman wanting a pretty weapon."Hey with the added color, opponents don't know they're made of Seastone till it's too late," she defended. Complaining about me making a weapon pretty when you're wearing make-up? Ass.Killer decided to change topics, preventing any unnecessary fighting, "The shit you doused those bodies with. What is it? And what are those crystals for?"Brown eyes sparkled behind her goggles. "The liquification mixture melts organic mass down to its base components. You know how oil is made right? From the decomposed bodies of plants and animals? Technically any organic mass can be processed into fuel if the conditions are right. The sludge could be refined to oil, but carrying all that liquid is annoying so I found a way to crystallize it. The gloves I wear have these little dials on them. Using a combination of my gravity modifier and high heat ray, I can compress the mass down and solidify it. The resulting crystals are bio-fuel. Energy is a precious resource. It's why lots of scientist have trouble funding their experiments," the woman disclosed, proud of one her best inventions to date."So you could power an engine with one?" Kid lit up, thinking of the things he'd be capable of. An alternative power source? Fuck, she's in, he thought glancing at Killer. With his eyes, he silently let his partner know, We're keeping the midget."Yeah. It's what I use to power my inventions. I'll have to add a modified power adaptor to your mainframe power reservoir before it's good to go," the short woman replied.Kid slapped his knee. "I knew I felt power radiating off of 'em," said the redhead, proud of his deducting skills. "You weren't here when we landed. I would have sensed you. How the fuck did you get to this island?"Professor Inator stretched, cracking her back, "I was stowed away on the marine ship that pulled in a few hours prior to our meeting. When they got close to the island, I jumped, swam, and lied in wait. I still need to loot that thing by the way."Killer moved closer, leaning in. "How is it the marines don't know your identity?" She's been operating for years if my calculations are correct."You see any Den-Den Mushi cameras?" she asked, tapping her finger on the desk."No," replied the tall man, realizing he hadn't seen a one."I release an aerolized salt mixture that has them running for hills before I make my appearance. That way the government doesn't know what I look like," Jam sneered.Electric blue eyes widened at the potential of such a compound. "And after that? How did you avoid detection from all the marines?"The triangle hood shook. "I don't. You'd be surprised how easily I slip into a base. No one really questions someone with a lab coat. I literally walk right in the front door. My size is deceptive; people never think I can't hurt them. They let their guard down and I just fuck 'em up," she palmed her fist. "Hell most cameras are angled to catch people's faces and the image they get doesn't include someone of my stature. Nobody assumes I'm capable of anything. It's insulting as all hell, but it does make my job easier. Just have to leave no survivors," she said, venom leaking into her voice."Why break into bases in the first place?" Killer pressed, wondering what could be of value here."I'm looking for information and secret labs to raid. This place was unfortunately a simple supply hub," she bemoaned dramatically."What kind of information?" The masked man said, his curiosity peaked."Research findings mainly. Historical documents. Reports detailing the movements of the marines. This place isn't much, just the usual fanfare," the lady whined, disappointed. A purple glove pointed to the large desk to the right of her. "In those cabinets behind that desk, you can pull up any pirate or criminal file. There's a report of all deployed marine vessels in the area on the big desk, current as of yesterday, a database of Den-Den Mushi numbers, that kind of shit," Jam divulged, bored at her meager findings."Can I see?" Killer asked thrilled.The woman scoffed. "You don't need my permission blondie. Knock yourself out," she said.Killer strode over to the main desk and began reading in earnest. This is amazing. Current reports straight from the horse's mouth. As usual Kid's instincts paid off. How he spots talent is a mystery. He sat down on the large swivel chair, and got straight to business, finding a blank sheet of paper and a pen.Kid rolled his eyes, knowing his right hand man was now in heaven. Well one of us has to do that kind of thing and I ain't doing it. Back to the interrogation... "When we were fighting, I felt like you should have succumbed to my blows quicker. What gives?"The young woman lit up, proud of this particular invention. "Oh my coat acts as specialized armor. It reduces damage received by forty-two percent and is flame proof incase an experiment goes awry. I store my noxious gases in specialized vials in my sleeves, hooking them up to my gloves with small tubes. The roomy pockets are great for holding onto medical supplies---" she was interrupted by a loud shout and a finger pointed in her face."Ah-ha I knew you cheated. My attacks are nothing to scoff at!" the large man yelled excitedly. This sneaky cunt, making me think my hits were shit. Fights dirty she does.She put her hand to chest, offended greatly. "It's not cheating. I created it with my own hands. All you did was stuff your fat mouth with a nasty fruit!" Cheated? This cocksucker.Lips pursed in anger. "Eh? You damn rude ass shorty. I'm your Captain! Captain! No sass!" he yelled bending down to put his face in her face. This mouthy shithead!The small woman snarled, standing up quickly, her chair vaulting backwards. "You haven't said I was joining. I'm not calling you Captain till then you pompous ass!" she yelled.Amber eyes narrowed dangerously, glittering with rage. "You little shit. I wouldn't be here if I wasn't offering you a spot!"The woman smirked, her anger deflating, "So I was right. Now ask nicely," she sang smugly.Golden eyes twitched in irritation. "Listen pipsqueak, I'll drag you to my ship if I have to," he threatened, a sinister grin overtaking his face. She'd be like a sack of potatoes, he thought chuckling in his mind.Her eyes bulged out of her head. "You really are a damn barbarian? I'd like to see you try, jackass," she hissed.Killer sighed, rubbing at his head, a headache threatening to take hold. "Now, now. What Kid means to say is you are invited to be a member and he has already begun constructing your lab." She's as volatile as he is."Really?" she squealed, jumping up. Kid blushed, glaring at his first mate for ratting him out. "Aw but you didn't see my blueprints!""I ain't no idiot. I know what a lab needs," the pale man grumbled.Jam pulled a piece of paper our of her coat pocket and handed it to Kid. "This is what I'd like."He snatched it, The audacity on this little bitch. The drawing was rough, but it had the base lines. "Feh, my design is better," he said, stealing Killer's pen, much to the latter's protest and began to draw what he envisioned on the back of her blueprints. After a few minutes he handed his layout plan over to Jam, tossing the pen back to his buddy. "This is a lab woman!" he slammed his fist down on the desk, making it rattle.Under her collar, Jam bit her bottom lip. Fucking engineer, his design is nicer and has tons of storage space. She looked up to see the smug grin adorning his face. It pissed her off but the promise of a lab was too good to fight over. She grabbed his metal arm and pulled him roughly to the door. "Come with me then," she sighed. Damn conceited turd.He snatched his hand away. "I don't need you to hold my hand," he shouted, hearing Killer's quiet chuckle.The short woman rolled her eyes, "Temperamental ass-hat.""What was that?" he growled."Nothing," she teased, leading him to a room next to the base's destroyed outer wall. It was brimming with treasure. "Here you can have all this. I've gathered everything of value in this cesspool. Consider it a gift for my laboratory. There's a box in the corner of a few things I want put in the lab, but the rest is yours," Professor Inator said, her arms making a high sweeping gesture.Kid was floored. This shrimp had the biggest balls he had ever seen. Several times his crew had gotten tangled up with the navy and not once did he think of robbing them. This bitch is crazy crazy. He could see lots of treasure. Probably stuff they took from other pirates. Booze, weapons, ammo, wires, electrical parts, supplies, the works. The Beli he'd save if they did this often would give him enough to establish a base like he wanted. He accidently tuned out the blabbering gremlin as he began plotting."Still got to clean out the kitchen and dissemble a few more things before I blow this place sky high and dance. Oh and if you need metal for anything there's lots in the foundation and shit," she said, her captain finally snapping back to reality."Huh? Dance?" he asked confused.She waved her arm. "It's completely unscientific, but its tradition where I'm from. For three, as in three days, three minutes, or three songs you dance over the corpses of your enemies to prevent them from finding any peace in this life, the afterlife, and their next life. I know it's ridiculous, but it's always brought me unmitigated joy. And while there's no corpses left, the sentiment is there," Jam defended.Stretching, she decided she needed to get a move on. "Alright I'll be back later. I was actually heading out to gather some raw materials for processing. Kinda running low on chemicals. I will join your ship tomorrow after taking care of some errands. Bye-bye," she chirped, walking away, hopping over the broken down wall in the direction of the forest.Kid just stood there, feeling out of place for a second. She jumps from one thing to the next. Hyperactive nut-job. Dancing over metaphorical bodies? Where the fuck is she from? He howled with laughter, picturing a dancing potato. He sighed after the laughter subsided, wondering what to do next. Killer was too engrossed for much of anything. He could feel the presence of his crew nearby. It hadn't even been long. Those idiots got antsy.He jumped over a broken wall and signaled for his namaka to come over. Placing his hands across his broad chest he said, "We have a new member. She's officially joining tomorrow after she wraps up some loose ends."His crew nodded, having already expected this outcome. "That was fast. How did she win over Killer?" Papas asked."He's nerding out in an information room reading and shit. Now the good professor was kind enough to gather up some loot for us. Loot graciously donated by the marines," he gloated, a nasty grin overtaking his features. He led them to the treasure room. "Take all this shit back to the ship and put it away. Cooking squad start on lunch without Killer, he's busy," the tall man ordered, his subordinates hopping into action with a chorus of "Yes Boss!"Heat, Wire and Emma stayed, wanting more from their leader. "Apparently she gets pissy about being a midget and holding shit outta her reach," he grumbled when the others had left.Emma smirked, "It was a dick move boss." Dive's the same way. Little Napoleon complex.The tall man rolled his eyes. "I don't think there was any way we weren't going to fight. She's a trash talking gremlin. But hell, the fight is what convinced her to join.""She admitted to being the potato-gremlin?" Wire asked, grinning.Kid chuckled darkly. "Aye, she did. Was angry at the article for the description," he said, eyes alight with mirth."You don't think she'd betray us," Heat asked, concerned.A frown marred his expressive face. "She hates traitors the same way I do. But if she tries anything, the ship is a literal weapon to me and now that I know to avoid that gas of hers, we'd be fine," he dismissed his namaka's concerns."So the loot?" wondered Emma, thinking of taking her little waitress friend out later with the extra funds."She robs the marines' blind. That's how she funds her research," a sinister smile spread across his face."Those are some big brass balls she's got boss," Emma whistled appreciatively.The captain snickered, "Thought so too. Woman's an absolute trip.""An actual scientist. Did she answer your questions Master Kid?" wondered Heat."Yeah. Mostly. She left to forage for raw materials.""Gathering herbs like Quincy and Pomp and do?" Wire asked, to which Kid nodded."It's too wet to dry and prep them here. She'll have to wait till we set sail," Heat added."Keh, that's her problem. Let's go get lunch. Killer will be fine and I'll bring back something for him to eat," the captain led his crew back to the ship.----------------------------------"This is a lot of stuff. See how much treasure she found. And booze!" Jaguar exclaimed, happy with the haul. I'm getting trashed tonight!"Treasure aide, all these bullets, swords, Seastone cuffs and chains are hella valuable," Bubblegum said, inspecting everything carefully. I'll have to redo my budget calculations, but fuck we will definitely have enough for me to spoil myself as a treat for this extra work. Go gremlin go."Yeah I won't need to buy bandages and basic supplies for awhile," Quincy said, handing a box of supplies to Pomp.Dive grinned wildly, "She even got wires and those components boss uses. And giving Killer access to intelligence reports? Woman hit the jackpot."A lip was sucked in as a soft voice groused out, "I don't like bribes. Feels fake you know?" Hop insisted, worried of the scientist's motives."I don't know if it's like that. Seems practical to take it. This island is small and all she did was pile it up for us," determined Boogie.Reck sighed, "We were all new once. I don't like harassing newbie's and honestly she'd probably kick your ass for trying. We saw how tuff she is, and the bitch has been sailing alone. That's insane," said the navigator, thinking of how difficult that would be. All that damn work...gross, he shuddered."Yeah but trusting a scientist? Ugh, they're sneaky," Gig responded, agreeing with Hop. How do we know she's not up to something?"Why would anyone want to join a crew just to betray them? She could have just killed everyone and been done with it," Mosh pointed out."Enough speculating. Captains' never steered us wrong before. End of discussion," UK barked, sick of this every time someone new came aboard. Same shit, different day. Gonna swipe some of that good liquor before these idiots give me a headache.Heads nodded in affirmation as the crew got back to work putting away their free supplies.***********************************Kid's crew seems really down for him. I think that's cool. Sure they will be cautious at first, however their conviction in their leader's plans is what cements their overall behavior. Killer may be the voice of reason, but at the end of the day he adores Kid and trusts his judgment. He may be more restrained than Kid but birds of a feather flock together.Kid is noted to be a lover of weapons so a scientist who builds them would definitely appeal to him. He also likes how violent she is. I believe that like Luffy, once he sets his mind on getting someone to join, he stays on that stubborn path, adding whoever he wants, I mean 31 total crew members. I'm trying to keep him believable but it's difficult. Kid is not good with feelings so admitting anything aloud is a no go. Over-analyzing and twisting everything in a negative light seems far more realistic.This will be a slow story ripe with details. It's just the way I write. I also do tons of dialogue, like a playwright. Tis my preference. Like a comic/manga writer I adore thought bubbles or in this case thoughts in italics. I get very bored at work and sneak away to make chapter outlines. Comments would be nice; it helps my work get noticed. This radio silence is creepy.
Also 1079 spoilers:
-----------------------------------------------------------------NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!You know what happened. I'm not repeating that awful drivel as it makes all the more real. These wouldn't be the first fictional men and women I cry over. Went and got a good bottle of sugarcane rum for this shit. I'll be singing sad angry songs till I pass out.I believe Oda's trying to show us what hubris and cruelty leads to. He's punishing Captain Kid for being the violent version of Luffy. But they're pirates and the world they live in cannot be held to the same standards we have. There have been tons of villains who made it out alive after committing atrocities of the highest caliber. The slave auctioneer Disco? Crocodile? Enel? Barto has high civilian casualties too. Caribou is known for burying people alive was going to sell mermaids to the slavers. Fuck Capone Gang Bege has one hell of a record...he's 42 and been in crime practically his whole life and he gets a wife and kid and to live happily ever after? Like no bro this is twisted.Kid has suffered heavily. Don't know exactly who did it but someone carves Kid's body up; those scars aren't cuts, they are lacerations. He's more battle scarred then pirates double his age. He's only 23 for fuck's sake. He loses an arm. Do you know how traumatic that truly is and the sheer force required to do so? He makes an alliance and gets betrayed and fights alongside Killer against Kaido till he can no longer move. Then his best friend eats a Smile for his sake and can't emote properly. His crew was tortured while he rotted in jail and Killer literally lost his sense of self for awhile after consuming the defective devil fruit. They get water tortured right after they reunite. He cries out for his people only to have them obliterated later? Hawkins plays a dirty trick and Killer prepares to sacrifice himself in exchange for Kid's life while laughing uncontrollably at the pain? The mental anguish. And destroying the ship that represents his first love. Cruel beyond words. They survive Kaido and Big Mom for this? And the worse injustice committed? Taking away his and Killer's fucking necks!What even was the point of his interactions with Luffy and co? The way they goofed around in prison was hilarious. Luffy's crew stops his stupid; Kid jumps right in. The hippo fight and acting like they have no idea what happened when he's defeated to the cheers of the other prisoners. When they overeat and blow up. When they fight over who can do the most work. Peak comedy. It had the feel of early One Piece with the silliness and was wonderful while it lasted. I really enjoyed the interactions between the three Supernova captains. They have not one brain cell between the three of them. Calling each other scrubs....hehehe. I died when they jumped the waterfall together like lunatics. I hate when the main character finally achieves their goal with no rival anywhere near their strength level at the end. I wanted him to have Law and Kid to hang with later in life when the older generation is gone.Some people say Kid deserves to go out because of his violence. But he was raised in violence. Look at the picture of child Kid with his torn up clothes. This child was not well cared for at all. And I willing to bet regular folks, aka civilians, treated him like a street urchin, with distain. A child that is not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth. That's why he doesn't care who he kills---if it's an obstacle it's going down, that's all he knows. He only trusts his people. But Shanks is the same. He protects his friends but he doesn't go out of his way to help everyone. With his strength he could have freed the people of Wano easily, gotten the poneglyph ages ago, so why didn't he? The emperors are an obstacle to the new generation. Speaking of that, what's was with the "Are you really afraid of the new gen" and then destroying Kid? No this is bullshit.I'm not going to lie, I've disliked Shanks since chapter one. What kind of irresponsible asshat let's a child get hold of a devil fruit? It wasn't even in a locked chest but its super valuable? The weird meeting with the five elders unnerved me greatly. Something's off about him.The ultimatum presented wasn't a benevolent offer. Shanks demanded the poneglyph rubbings and told them to scram. Straight up robbing Kid. Giving those up is the equivalent of giving up on their dream. And what's to say the Kid Pirates didn't need to land after being out at sea. Kind of dooming a pirate not allowing them to dock. So please stop acting as if Shanks is kind because he wanted to make sure they were all healed after Wano. Oda did that to show off Shank's power as in Shanks one shotted them while they were at full health. Furthermore he attacks Kid on the basis of his future sight which can change and is not 100% accurate. He attacked him because of the damage he could cause, not necessarily what he would cause or did cause. A marked difference. He could have talked to him, blocked his attack, or knocked him out. Shanks played judge, jury, and executioner. Kid and Killer were bleeding heavily, so badly that the other subordinates were cowed into immediate surrender.We have inferred that it was most likely Ben Beckman who took Kid's arm. He didn't go looking for Shanks--- he unluckily pulled up on them. And viewing them in the lens of an enemy, cause how are they not, of course he's going to fight. Shanks Commanders shouted to Kid that they wouldn't let him touch their boss and insult him as well. No shit he was going to use his biggest attack against an emperor and whoever sided with that emperor. He has no reason to believe that the Redhairs are honest and that they would hold up their end of the deal if they gave them the etchings and left---there's no trust between these two and Kid has been betrayed before, making him unlikely to trust anyone, much less Captain of the fucker who took his left arm. He has to fight.This chapter felt like poor writing, because after all the hype to just one shot Luffy's supposed biggest rival from his own generation, was Criminal. Plus even if you are a Shanks fan (BARF) all you got was one measly attack---what about his other nine member? Its been over two decades; I want to see some action!The power scaling feels uneven as hell. And when they gave up and thought they were safe, having those giants take them out served no purpose to progressing the storyline. If the three identical bounties were to show that the three rookies' were equal, then Kid's loss translated to Luffy losing if he were in that position. There was no further need to destroy them. Some have likened the scenario to you live by the sword you die by the sword and true that (you point a gun be prepared to get shot), but what the fuck would you do surrounded by so many enemies basically forcing you give up on your dreams?They may still be alive, but the way the narrator said they were exterminated makes me nervous. I'm hoping against all odds it's like a Sabaody thing which was what the narrator did with the Strawhats. I want a revenge arc. Also Kid's flower resemblance is the tulip, whose meaning encompasses both true love and rebirth. Oda said he had plans for Kid, I'm hoping a one-shot death to hype up Shanks wasn't the entirety of those plans.And if you say Kid's crime was overconfidence... have you met Luffy? Even Nami wouldn't lie and say her captain won't be pirate king to save her ass from the Dino girl.But the absolute worse: how many people do not like him. The vitriol spewed is crazy. Like people hate Eustass Kid. The memes and TikToks are brutal. Useless Captain Mid...ugh. They are even mean to Law, saying he's dead. Do we not read the same manga? How do they hate these two? Their crime of dreaming and not being the MC?The design for the crew and ship was cool. You don't get these types of characters often. if you know, you know. This is tragic. I'm going to go drink to my delusions. Denial is a river and I love to swim. Or perhaps I'll pull a Zoro and control alt delete chapter 1079 from my brain.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Jam was busy collecting plants, flowers, berries, bark, stones, shells, and anything she thought could get her a nice supply of base ingredient to work with. She'd need several glass jars for storage. There were quite a few at the base and even some flasks, beakers, and vials, but those would run out quickly. She would check out this settlement, but doubted it had much of what she required.Oh well. The short woman took a small pocket knife, humming as she sliced fauna for collection, imaging it being foes. Die die hehehehe. A few hours later, her bags were full and her belly aching. Trudging back to the base, she was surprised to find the masked blonde still in the file cabinets, diligently scanning documents. An info freak he is. "You've been busy?" she asked, dropping her bags on the desk she claimed.Killer glanced up from the desk, his neck stiff. "Ah yes, there is just so much here." He had a small stack of haphazard notes in front of him.The woman nodded, knowing how valuable good intel was. "I can give you a notepad if you'd like to better organize your findings?" She swore his eyes were sparkling behind that mask. Professor Inator handed him a small notebook from the desk drawers."Ah, thank-you," he said scribbling down some annotations. Now to talk to her without Kid. "I've read up on the mysterious marine base destroyer for a few years now. How long have you been at your game?" the massacre soldier asked, glancing up at her."I've been a recognized scientist for eight years. Kinda slip under the radar is all. Those bastards can't have eyes and ears everywhere. Destroying government property is easy when no one fears you," she bit out, crossing her arms over her chest.Reading between the lines, the tall man nodded, "They base their assumptions on your small stature. That's why what Kid did pissed you off to high hell," he accurately guessed.The woman tensed, her lack a height a sore subject. "I just don't look menacing. It's embarrassing dammit," the small woman griped, her hands balling into fists by her side."How old are you?" Killer wondered, knowing most scientists were older and being curious just how old this hothead was."Twenty-three," Jam answered casually.Blonde eyebrows rose, in mild shock, "Fifteen is when you started? That's frightfully young." She's a year older than Kid and three years younger than myself. And she has several inventions under her belt already. Not bad. Well, we started when we were kids too. The world's fucked."Yeah. Seventeen when I went solo. I've been looking for a place since. There are mysteries all over the world, so I need to travel. But fuck the government," she replied, tiredly. I'd just like to be able to research to my heart's content and not be made into a slave."So pirates?" Killer helpfully supplied. She nodded. "And the Captain?" he asked, getting to the crux of his concern."Was qualified enough to be called Captain," she said, wondering how much detail she should give out. I'm willing to join you but not tell you everything. Not for some time at least. You're a pushy motherfucker Killer."But what did you see exactly that impressed you?" the blonde pressed, always looking out for Kid.A gloved finger went up to her masked chin, tapping it thoughtfully. "Hmm, he cares. That's what stopped me from killing you guys. He genuinely panicked for your wellbeing. Most captains just replace crew members like nothing. That man was willing to bear the burden alone. I can respect that," she answered honestly, knowing that such paltry information wouldn't sate the masked man. She could see him lean forward, in anticipation of details.Frowning slightly, she continued, "The Conquers Haki was a pleasant surprise. Means he's got grand ambitions and is the type of man who has leadership qualities. His power in particular is very interesting. There's so much I could do with it. Little known thing, most scientist can get something incredible to work but then can't duplicate it. You need an engineer for that and finding a good one is near impossible," Jam detailed, unaware of the awe in her voice.Killer pondered her words carefully, seeing exactly how she managed to fluster Kid. "You build stuff too?" he asked, wondering if she could help his buddy with all the mechs he made."Yeah," she said, walking over to the corner. "Look here, this is a dehydrator. I use it to quickly dry out materials to process into chemicals. But it has other purposes too. Food preservation for things like jerky and dried fruits. Spices gain potency when dried, as do peppers. Drying food also stores in the nutrients, making it invaluable when on the seas," she explained, remembering all the times she was saved by shelf stable provisions. And dried fruit is so yummy."Can I try it?" he asked hopefully."Sure there's meat in the kitchen on the first floor...." She sweat-dropped, watching the masked soldier dash away before she could finish her sentence. Impatient as his Captain. More polite, though. Sighing Jam lifted her machine and bags and walked down to the kitchen, looking forward to her leftovers. She saw Killer busy rummaging through the fridge, grabbing various meats. He confidently made himself at home, pulling out cutting boards, knifes, and bowls. Is this fucker making a marinade?Jam set down her load down with a huff. She plugged in the dehydrator, glad the base still had power for now. Should probably check out how they do it. Always good to have other options.Letting her machine warm up, she decided to have lunch first. Removing her gloves, the professor grabbed her food and a cola from the fridge and went to the oven to heat up the leftovers. "How do you guys power your ship?" she asked, pulling her collar down, revealing purple lips. The woman took a sip of cola and sat down for a second.Killer paused, putting the whisk down. "Ah, Kid built an engine. You'd have to talk to him on how stuff is powered exactly. We do use a hydro pump and there is an emergency stash of fuel, but Kid can use his devil fruit to power it too," the long haired man explained."I knew he was special," she muttered. I've never worked with magnets but I've got some ideas. Just need to see him in action.Killer hummed thoughtfully, "How did you make this?"A small manicured hand patted the machine lightly. "I modified an industrial oven with a fan and used some parts from other kitchen appliances and such. I like to make my own chemicals when I can. Sometimes the purity is shitty from the shops and the black market is hit or miss. Plus I'm banned," she cackled."How do you get yourself banned from the black market?" I didn't think that was possible."When I got a defective batch of capacitors I called to demand a refund. The dirty sons of bitches acted like they could do whatever they wanted and ignore little 'ole me, so I traced the call, robbed them blind, and destroyed the place on my way out. The underground doesn't appreciate when you off their brokers," she sighed, annoyed at the inconvenience."You're a nasty piece of work aren't you?" he chuckled, finding some camaraderie with the woman."I try," she cooed, taking pleasure in the fact that he was violent too.Kid by now was sneaking back, having sensed his friend with the angry midget. Quietly, he slithered through the halls, listening outside the open door. He had with him a bunch of lunch boxes to share with his buddy and House had convinced him it might be a good idea to offer some to his newest member. He found them in the kitchen, the woman sifting through those bags she had earlier, separating plants. She was placing them on a metal tray in a single layer, instructing Killer to do the same with some meat."It has to be a single layer or it won't dry properly. This machine holds ten trays. So you can have five and I'll use the other five for my plants. The blonde nodded excitedly, taking the trays from her and spacing out the meat he prepared. "It will take about four to five hours depending on how you prefer it. I'll set the timer for four so you can check it," she instructed.Deciding to announce his presence, Kid grumbles, "Jesus Kill, I wouldn't forget to bring you lunch shithead."A blonde head swiveled around, so lost in his endeavor he didn't notice his friends approach. "Oh Kid. No No. It's for jerky! She has a jerky machine!""It's a dehydrator and I use it primarily for drying out materials," Jam corrected, fiddling with the knobs.But Killer wasn't listening, humming away happily, completely in his element in the kitchen."Jerky?" The pale man asked, licking his lips. Jerky was a real treat. On the sea it was usually too humid for the meat to dry just right and with the risk of food poisoning being so high, jerky was generally not something they got to enjoy."It also dries spices, herbs, and peppers to make them more potent. Oh the flavorful pastas I can make!" Little hearts were dancing around his mask.Jam wiggled her eyebrows, and grinned. "He's a dork isn't he?""He likes to cook, he's not a dork," Kid scoffed, adamantly lying in defense of his best friend, turning around to face the professor. "Fucking hell...." Kid muttered, zeroing in on her cute pouty lips. The color was a nice deep purple. It looked good against her tanned skin. He felt his ears redden. Luckily neither of his companions were paying any attention.Several minutes later Killer and Jam had their respective trays done and placed in the dehydrator. The kitchen oven dinged and Professor Inator skipped over to remove her food. Kid gruffly set the lunch boxes out, "The guys made lunch. You didn't have cook," he said.Killer shook his head, "I didn't. She had those from last night I presume."Kid eyed the little triangle shaped pastries, picking one up and sniffing. They smell delicious.Figuring the Captain from South Blue was unfamiliar with the dish, the professor explained, "They're empanadas. The ones on the left are ham and honey with sweet potato, the middle ones spiced beef with cabbage, onion, and potatoes, and the end ones are chicken, cheese, and habanero peppers."Kid popped the ham flavored one in his mouth, swallowing greedily. They were good. He then snatched the tray, placing it in front of himself."Hey!" she shouted. This bottomless pit is going to steal my lunch."Ya can 'ave whatever ya want from these," he said, his mouth full, pushing the lunch boxes forward.She snatched some of her empanadas back. "I still want a few, you greedy ass."Kid snorted, about to retort when he ingested the chicken one. He started sputtering. "Heat would love these," he muttered regaining his composure."Too hot for you?" she laughed, picking through the boxes, seeing what kind of foods his cooks prepared. A lot of pasta dishes, some ramen, veggie sticks, steaks, potatoes, salads, and some cookies of all things. She grabbed a pork ramen and began eating. Not bad. Very flavorful and a rather nice selection of veggies.Amber eyes narrowed, "Was surprised is all. They're not that hot," he lied, eating another, suffering though the pain.Killer finally tore himself away from the dehydrator to pull two beers out of the base's fridge. He handed one to Kid and popped a straw in his. Selecting a plate of pasta primavera, he slurped the noodles right though his helmet, to the astonishment of the scientist.He never removes that mask I'm guessing. "I can leave if you prefer to eat without an audience," she offered.Killer shook his head, accidently dropping sauce on the table. "No I eat like this in front of the crew," he answered.Her eyes widened behind her goggles. "But it's so messy.""We're pirates. Its' fine," Kid said with an air of finality.The small woman shook her head, and went back to munching. Guess he's nutty too. For a moment all was peaceful, the three of them lost in thought.Finishing up her pork ramen, the woman reached for a salad. "What kind of research requests are you interested in?" she asked, wondering if her hunches were right. Please be different from all those worthless asswipes.Reaching for some steak, Kid tilted his head, pondering what exactly he wanted to reveal for now. "Those power crystals are sick. Gonna need you to explain them in detail. It takes a lot of power to run the ship and all its things with thirty people. Was thinking of some new mech builds to hash out, never had anyone else to bounce ideas off of that weren't fucking nonsense. Quincy and Pomp are my medics. They wanted to talk to you about medical stuff. I think lasers are badass. Weapons in general. I like to collect rare ones," Kid got out, chewing loudly with his mouth open.A loud sigh escaped her lips. "Good, no ridiculous requests," Jam said happily. I'd have hightailed it then, fancy laboratory or not.Kid cocked a non-existent eyebrow. "Ridiculous as in?""Immortality, eternal youth, super soldiers, and gigantification. None of those are viable, not truly at least," she replied, munching delicately, enjoying her meal. They are much better cooks than I am. All I know is sandwiches and my favorite dishes from home. This is going to be wonderful."Really? I thought that Caesar Clown guy was working on that for that old hag Big Mom," Killer asked, his mask covered in bits of food and sauce.Jam had to bite her lip to keep from laughing. "Ah you lurk in the underworld. Excellent," she began, polishing off the salad, and going back to her empanadas. "A true permanent expansion of mass? No, the cells would become unstable, the lifespan shorted, and the mind handicapped severely, unable to follow proper orders. Frenzied rampages would be common, with the afflicted set off for absolutely random ass reasons. And you can't do it to someone already grown. Vegapunk killed a lot 'criminals' trying to get it work years ago and Caesar Clown uses children, the younger the better," she finished off with a slight shudder. "I'm screwy and I've never thought of fucking with kids."The blonde's fork clattered to the ground and Kid stopped eating. "He takes brats?""Yeah. I do some heinous shit, but only to marines and bastard adults who try to kill me. He's not the only one though. Vinsmoke judge experimented on his own kids while they were still in the womb," the small woman replied, appalled.Killer walked over to the kitchen cabinet and grabbed a replacement fork for himself. "What do you mean by stressing the word criminals?" he asked, afraid of the answer."How many criminals are actually criminals? They just up and declare whoever they want as one and bam, the poor bastard can be taken in to use as experiment fodder. Vegapunk tried with all the different races, but to get a substantial sample size, the government fabricated criminals from regular people. Don't know if he knew the details exactly, but even lumping in petty criminals with more violent offenders is shitty behavior," she said, serving herself some potatoes.Silence met her words. They knew the bastards in charge were fucked in the head, but to hear it out loud was a different beast altogether."Ya sure?"She snorted indignantly. "I break into bases and read secret reports all the time. The things I could tell you. And when I stow away, I hear quite a bit hiding in the air vents.""Can't they sense you?""I can make myself undetectable if necessary," she said, refusing to divulge any further. That's my backup just in case.She could help Dive with information gathering. I know the pipsqueak can fight but she's going just as useful as a support member. The medicine she makes will help Quincy and if we can work out new mechs and weapons, I'll be set. I'm not big on poisons but they could come in handy in a pinch. Her usefulness was what mellowed out his need to punish her for yesterday. Killer advised it would be in poor form, but the thought lingered. Sighing to himself, he decided he could let it go unless she pulled some shit. Those empanadas helped too, he thought greedily."By super soldiers you mean the Pasifistas?" the massacre soldier questioned."Those shitty Pasifistas are nothing more than robot slaves Vegapunk created to be the government's perfect soldiers. They don't eat, they don't sleep, and they follow orders no matter how atrocious," Jam spat, disgusted by the things she knew.Before the two could get a word in edgewise, she continued, "You know how that two-bit fuckhead made them? He turned his so called friend, Warlord Bartholomew Kuma, bit by bit into a robot. Imagine the pain from constant surgeries. Took away his free will and everything. With friends like him who needs enemies? I don't care what he hoped to discover, it's clear he never viewed Kuma in the same light," the venom in her voice rose to a dangerous growl. I hate traitors and that was a total betrayal of trust.Kid shivered internally picturing doing that to Killer. "You know a lot about the dealings of other scientists?" So she's connected?She put her hand under her chin, and sighed. "There's an underground network of scientists that have meetings to discuss advancements in their respective fields. None of them really get along, big egos and shitty attitudes all around, but they meet to brag. I tune in sometimes.""Aren't they worried about the World Government listening in?"The woman broke off into cackling high-pitched laughter. "Hahahaha. Those idiots? Fat chance they could even follow the conversation. The books wide open but those dumbasses can't read. 'Sides everyone's faces are obscured, their voices altered, and we all use a code name. The meetings themselves are on secure Den-Den Mushi lines only, and the times are given by the head scientist leaving a coded message. Only someone of superior intellect could decipher the information in order to tune in at the appropriate time," Jam elaborated, bemused by the thought of the government being capable of jack shit.Her biggest contribution is going to be intel. She has the kind of knowledge the marines assassinate people for. I'm beginning to see why she tested our loyalty. "You don't seem to think too highly of your fellow scientists do you?" the blonde asked, reaching for some veggie sticks."Do you think highly of your fellow pirates?" she asked sarcastically, sipping at her cola.Kid snickered, grabbing a steak and chewing loudly, "Da fuck would I do that? I talk shit about those scrubs.""You seem to hold them in contempt though," said Killer, crunching loudly."Because they all focus on the same things. Where's the variety? The ingenuity? The innovation? It's all same old same old. And all of them cloistered up in the safety of a lair, protected by others, never really getting their hands dirty and discovering new things. It's ridiculous!" she replied, her voice rising in both volume and speed. Lazy, stupid wastes of air!She slammed her fists on the table, startling the two larger men. "People talk about Vegapunk like's he's a god and not the Government's bitch. The man isn't blind to what his inventions are used for. It's not like those Pasifistas don't cause a shit ton of collateral damage. And that's just one invention; he's been working for the Government for decades," she sneered, her contempt of the man abundantly evident in her tone."Have you met him?" It's like she hates him personally. I wonder why.Her nose wrinkled in disgust. "Never, and I don't want to. According to the rumor mill, he had the chance to work for the Revolutionaries but he turned them down because they were too broke," she scoffed. Greedy ass mother-fucker. I bet it's what it does him in one day."But doesn't it take a lot to fund your research?" How are we going to afford a scientist Kid?"Not typically. I mean certain projects can. However I make most of my own chemicals and components and while scientists tend to be good at complex math, simple math, like finance, baffles the fuck outta them. Most overspend and a fair lot of them waste money on things like fancy clothes, jewelry, booze, gambling, and whores. Basically they can't budget for shit. Honestly most are straight up scamming people. That's exceedingly common," Jam revealed.Killer's eyes widened. "Isn't that dangerous?""Scientists are confident they can fool anybody. How does someone of regular intelligence know how much a discovery costs? We can charge anything," she shrugged."And you're different?" Killer asks calmly. She basically called everyone stupid."Nope," she confessed, popping the p on nope. "I've tricked several shitheads over the years. However, I usually steal all the things I require and if you don't want to be tricked, don't be a french-fried fuck. I'm a reactive person. You treat me well, I'll repay the favor. Screw me over and you'll rue the day."Snagging two cookies, she bolted up. "Lunch was great but I have to make a pit-stop at the shops before they close. Your jerky will be done in a few hours, but I should be back by then. Toodles," she waved, practically skipping away, looking forward to her shopping trip and wanting to escape the heaviness of this conversation. They're really nosy. I need a break from this.The duo watched her flounce away, Kid snorting at her antics. "She bounces from one task to the next huh?" the blonde asked.Kid relaxed and shoved a cookie into his mouth. "Seems so. The professor is a hyper little thing. You think this is a good idea?" the redhead asked his long-time confidant.The blonde slurped down some noodles, loudly smacking. "Yeah, strangely enough. We just have to watch her till she becomes one of us. But shit the sheer amount of info she just casually belted out. Wonder how much she really knows," Killer pondered. "She's clearly crazy, but it's not like the whole crew isn't batshit insane. Honestly I can't believe she admitted to scamming people so nonchalantly."The younger man snorted, thinking the same. "Told ya she's a straight trip." Kid leaned back, full from all the food they stuffed down. Little shit ate a lot for something so tiny. He agreed with his partner. Bitch is off, but shit she's valuable. Just got to get the shrimp to open up more. It was obvious she skims over stuff. She info dumps to distract what all she's hiding. "I'm going to get back to the ship and look over things. You coming?"Blonde hair shook. "No there's more files to read. I'll grab a few and sit in here to watch this machine."Kid snickered, "Damn I'm full, but that smells amazing. Save me some when it's done, will ya?" The shaggy haired man nodded, waving his best friend off.-------------------------------Hours later, when the machine dinged, Killer beamed. The aroma had been intoxicating for quite some time now. He pulled the trays out and inspected his prize. Perfection. The wait to try a piece was murder. Carefully lifting his mask, he hungrily devoured a piece of dried meat. It was wonderful. Chuckling to himself, he set all the pieces into the now cleaned lunch boxes from earlier. Gonna take these back for the guys to try.Deciding to not be an ass, he carefully laid out Jam's plants on the table, replacing the empty trays. Drumming his fingers on the table he made a decision, heading back to the Victoria Punk.------------------------------------Kid escapes from Wano prison in Seastone cuffs to look for his crew before being recaptured to be with Killer. I don't know how that big fucker gave the guards the slip but he's clearly a sneaky bastard.As someone who creates, having a like-minded individual to bounce ideas off of is essential. Talking to just yourself leads to shitty bad ideas---having a friend or a muse is wonderful. His builds definitely improve from what little we see in Sabaody and then later in Wano. The designs Kid uses in Wano look well thought out; he's built them at a prior time. Several times to have that level of proficiency. The fact his crew isn't amazed, they've seen it before.Killer is very much a dork. Have you seen him eat? Could you picture a professional assassin eating though tiny holes in a mask making a huge mess? How does his crew not die of laughter? There exists these silly panels of omakes (From One Piece Party) where he flies with his scythes, spits out a knockout stream like in Water 7, and tries to get Kid to wear a red mask identical to his blue one. Killer's also is knowledgeable on historical facts, making him a super dork. He's still dangerous as fuck, but he's not one dimensional.
Read from Right to Left. Proof he is Sir Dorky.
Kid is less Dorky. And very angry. They really seem like brothers here.
Kid is not amused. And they say Killer is more serious. These are from One Piece Party, a sidepiece gag story authorized by Oda but written by Ei Ando. Still I use the info, not necessarily as canon, as the events may not have happened, but I do utilize the actions/reactions of the characters to solidify my interpretation of their personality. Scottish dishes use dried herbs and pungent spices, and apparently haggis is a bit spicy? I can't confirm---never had any but according to my research the man is seasoned. Killer's favorite food is Agilo E Oilo Peperoncino (a spaghetti-like dish with garlic, red pepper flakes, olive oil, and parsley) so yes they like spicy food. I believe Killer handles spicy things better than Kid does, but there's no way Kid wouldn't try and pretend he's fine. He can handle regular herbs and spices just fine (like black pepper isn't hot and paprika is good) but not like dried peppers or super hot sauce. He's a moderately seasoned pale man. Jam is very well connected. She may have burned bridges for fun but that doesn't mean she doesn't have pull when necessary. Talent is talent. She is conceited as fuck; this tiny gremlin looks up to no one---the older scientists are not her heroes. She trusts far too quickly, assured by her many abilities that she can make a getaway no matter what. She has decided by what she knows of them and the information she reads in their files, that Kid and his crew are ok to trust for base level knowledge. It may bite her in the ass. This is mid time-skip so Kid is 22, Jam 23, and Killer 26.
A Continued Rant:
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!These guys are goofballs. Why eliminate them? Why Oda?! I know Oda rarely kills but, that "hope no one dies interview" has me worried. My heart can't take this. This break after that heavy chapter was evil. Are the Kid pirates ok? Law better be fine!Thank-you to those that left comments, votes, kudos, or reviews depending on what platform you read my work on. It gives me much needed happiness.And ha-ha to my instincts. Dive was clearly scouting out danger with UK on top of the ships skull while the rest of the crew looked after Kid. Heat took over as third in command, making the hard decision of handing over their Road Poneglyphs, with Wire and Emma standing nearby alluding to their positions as fourth and fifth in command, exactly as I pictured them-- Kid's top commanders.I am going to let Oda cook and hope it turns out well for our two supernova captains. This is hard for me as so many great pieces of literature have fumbled the ending. Bad endings are what drove me to fanfiction in the first place. That and the smut...the thirsty stuff on this site, smh. Speaking of that, there will be a small scene of that nature next chapter.
Spoilers for 1080:
00000000000000000000000000000000There was no new news on Kid or Law. We saw new members of Sword, Coby, Blackbeard, and Perona of all people (I really like her though), looking for Moria who has been imprisoned by Blackbeard. I'm hoping Law's imprisoned or that this fight is a flashback and he's still fighting Blackbeard; Law's fruit would only be useful in a doctors hands and I'm sure Blackbeard wants him to do the immortality surgery. This chapter was a glorification of Garp, the same way the last chapter highlighted Shanks. Not really my thing. I'm sure Oda is using it to show how much further Luffy needs to go, but I felt cheated. I would have preferred to hear on Bonney, Luffy, or Sabo if he's going to leave us hanging on Kid and Law.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Nine ladies gathered in the woman's quarters, lounging about."So this Professor won over Killer and the guys with a jerky maker thingy and all that loot. But we still need to properly interrogate her. Men can be so stupid sometimes," Clash huffed, "What do we know so far?" she snapped, eating some chips."She's got balls of steel. Fists too," Emma supplied, from her spot leaning against her dresser. "Mouthy shithead though.""You don't think she's after the Captain?"It was a legitimate concern. Pretty woman tried every so often to seduce their beloved leader and either hand him over to the authorities or kill him outright.A royal blue eyebrow rose in confusion. "Were we looking at the same bitch? I don't think she's the flirty type. Vulgar yes, but come on she's covered from head to toe. Probably deformed from some science experiment gone wrong. The women he chooses to bed are always beautiful. Tall leggy woman with big busts. She's short and probably round," Joplin giggled, a few others joining in."And what's wrong with being short?" Dive huffed, insulted to her very core.Joplin waved her hands dismissively, "Not like that. Just we don't have to worry about him being seduced by a potato gremlin.""You know, the Captain loves potatoes, Dive replied mischievously, unwilling to let the short comment go."Why the fuck did you have to say that?!" Hop screeched."It was funny," the small woman sang. Shouldn't insult me. I'm just as womanly as you are."She'll be here tomorrow, we can investigate her motives then," Whitney said in a bored tone. Who really cares? The Captain will do what as he pleases.House grimaced, ever the peace maker, "I don't think if fair of us to be mean to her. Scientists are cold-hearted; I doubt she's looking for romance. The insult spewing monster we fought had no feminine appeal whatsoever," she said, touching up her make-up."Yeah and how many scientists have you met?" Clash asked."Well none other than Professor Inator, but I've heard stories. It's just, would we treat her nicer if she was a guy? Is that really fair to her? And calling her ugly, like what are we thirteen?" House asked. The room silenced after that, all of them feeling chastised."It's good to be cautious, but the Captain has good instincts. If he thinks someone is one of us, when has he ever been wrong? Honestly none of us have ever brought in loot like that. That crazy bitch steals from the marine's on the regular," Whitney said, busy combing her hair. And now we have fun money to play with. I'm good with her.Quincy sighed, wanting to learn medical knowledge from their newest member. "Her medicine was superb. I'd like to pick the Professors brain. Just think of her as useful tool. And boss will finally have someone to talk about machines with." Bores us all to tears with that..."It's because he was enjoying himself, arguing with her. He jokes around with us, but boss doesn't really banter with us. He likes poking her," Hip whined, falling down on her mattress.Blonde eyebrows wiggled in naughty delight. "So a euphemism for poking her with his dick?""Emma!" Hip shouted."What?!" the Mohawk having woman shouted, enjoying the chaos, Dive laughing along with her."I do not like talking about the Captains, you know?""Dick?" Emma asked, smiling. The room's occupants groaned at their perverted friend."He was excited earlier," Joplin muttered."She's a fancy dangerous toy of course he's excited. Those weird crystals looked sick," Dive said, eager to find out what they did. That lunatic turned people into crystals. Anyone would be interested.Quincy sighed, filing her nails. "None of us have ever seriously fought him. When we spar he goes easy on us. She took his hits head on. Sure she had her weird ass tech helping her, but she did invent it. He's impressed and we all know a good fight gets his blood pumping. That's all it is." I doubt he's even thinking about her in that light."Besides, you heard how she talked about the government. She's as bad as any of us. And a scientist would boost us nicely," said House, reaching for a black lipstick.Hip frowned. "No his excitement felt more than that. He's already building her a lab. Who is she to make demands?" the short-haired woman complained."A mad scientist with cool ass tech. And if he is interested in that manner you can't blame her," Whiney said, finishing her hair and adding a cute bejeweled red headband. Hip and Joplin glared at their dark-skinned crewmate.Emma sighed sensing an argument. "Hey we all care for the boss, but he's a horny bastard. The only reason he hasn't visited the brothels lately is he's self-conscious of his missing arm and those new scars. But we all know he has the libido of a raging bull. Who really cares who he fucks, just that he is or he's a right fuckhead to put up with," the slender woman snorted. "So long as they don't try to betray him or anything, who he gets his rocks off to is none of our concern. But for real, you guys are reading into this way too much. They just met and she hardly seemed interested in anything like romance.""All the Professor wanted was a lab to work in and a small bedroom. I for one don't relish the idea of bunking with a lunatic anyway," Quincy added, not really seeing the problem."We don't know what happened when she knocked us out," Hop pointed out, concerned. "It was enough to make the loudmouth clam up.""I doubt the Captain will ever tell. And there's no way any of us are getting Killer to talk," House replied.The shortest woman stood, popping her back. "Dive?" asked Emma."That jerky smells delicious, I'm out," she said heading for the door. Honestly Joplin and Hip need to get over themselves. If Kid hasn't bothered by now, he probably never will."You shitty carnivore," Hip complained, throwing a pillow at the shorter woman, who dodged easily."Hey anything Killer makes is heavenly, I'm not missing out," the short woman said, done with this conversation."Pigtails does have a point. Let's go before they notice our absence," Clash muttered.--------------------------------------Most of the crew was in gallery with Killer and Maoi manning their new toy. Together they were thinking up marinades and flavor combos they could try. "We're doing hickory smoked next!" the large man shouted to cheers.Kid took off to his workshop after trying some of Killer's Teriyaki Jerky. It was divine.And so the blonde filled his crewmates in on what he had learned. "She is definitely dangerous as we all saw, but Professor Inator really wants a lab and the ability to travel. Only a pirate crew could provide that. Kid is always spot on about identifying a true Kid Pirate. I know her attitude is shitty but the few things we've seen her make are impressive. I'd advise everyone to be wary but not hostile unless she warrants it."Nods were given in their second in command's direction. Killer told them all about the tech she had shared. The crew gasped. "We can power the ship with dead marines? That metal as fuck!" Thrill shouted, throwing his hand up into the horns symbol and sticking his tongue out."Bio-fuel. She's a twisted bitch alright," snorted Forte."Naw its eco-friendly. She's just getting rid of trash," Clash snickered.The room broke out in peels of macabre laughter."So that coat helped her fight. Pretty smart move making an opponent think their hits aren't that effective. Captain sure knows how to spot 'em," said Compo, his friends readily agreeing with him.Killer sighed, preparing for the hardest part of this conversation. "Now because of her danger level Kid and I have decided on something we've never done to a new member. I know it's intrusive and I'm the last person who should disrespect a person's privacy but, ..."----------------------------------------------Jam greatly enjoyed visiting the shops, buying some clothes, shoes, make-up, and a large fluffy blanket. Ah a proper wardrobe. And no more sleeping in tents or in government buildings.She found a medical supply shop and purchased vials, flasks, and decanters, but as she suspected, the store was lacking. She even got some basic chemicals she could use, the purity levels surprisingly decent.The townspeople were subdued, likely a result of the visiting pirates. Still not a bad place to load up on things. I wonder if they've noticed the lack of marines?Heading back to the base, she got to work bagging up all of her belongings. Stopping by the kitchen for a drink, she realized her dehydrator was missing, a small note in its place.Took machine to set it up: KillerThat bastard just wanted more jerky and shit. And I needed to dry out more things! Fuming, she stomped about, till she saw how neatly he set out her plants. Hissing in annoyance, she took the dried out plants and began the process of crushing and refining her chemicals, perhaps grinding with far too much force. That shitty no good blond twat...-----------------------------------------------Kid was tinkering by his lonesome, lost in thought. That little squeal had been cute. And the only reason he maintained his composure was Killer being right there. Not giving that blonde bastard any material to work with. Keh, he was fangirling over a jerky maker. Fucking dork.The Professor's laboratory was coming along nicely. The lab itself was situated across from his workshop in the bowels of the ship. Her bedroom was small and attached to the front of the lab. He ordered UK to make a bed frame and dresser and sent Heat to grab a mattress. It had been a lot of work, but all those stolen goods had more than enough paid for it. Those meager purchases didn't make a dent in anything.The trash talking little mouth had been on his mind since lunchtime. Lipstick was a weakness of his since he was a small boy. Her pretty purple lips... He snapped the piece of metal that was in his hands clean in two.
The brothel. I need a break and clearly there's something wrong if I'm thinking 'bout that shitty gremlin. Fuck this is the first town we've chilled at since our fight with Red Hair, I'm pent up.
Mind made up, he stretched and headed off the ship before anyone noticed. It didn't take long and soon he was behind closed doors, a willowy blue haired beauty in a tiny pink dress his chosen company for the evening. She batted long eyelashes up at him, "Good evening. I am---"Kid interrupted her with a frown, "I don't care about that wench. If I wanted conversation, I'd have chatted up some bitch at the bar. Strip and get on your knees."The woman flinched at his harsh tone, but felt compelled to obey. A supernova captain was not the type of person she could ignore. His metal arm and numerous scars made her nervous, but she had little choice in the matter. She sighed internally and steeled herself for the evening.Kid smirked and got comfy on the bed's edge. She reached up and began undoing his pants, a soft smile on her pretty face. An expert at her craft, the woman began by enveloping him nearly whole, a grunt of satisfaction making its way out of dark lips. She's good. Fuck I needed this.He's so big. I figured he was, but wow. The tall woman used both her hands and mouth to keep the notoriously angry man happy, alternating her technique and paying attention to his groans to see what he liked best. She kept her head down, knowing that most pirates liked submissive woman. Bobbing her head the woman licked him from base to tip, enjoying the sharp hiss her client made. She then got a rhythm going, taking him in deeply as possibly. Kid had thrown his head back, and began inhaling deeply, the pressure of an oncoming orgasm approaching rapidly. He could feel himself getting ever closer, his breathing becoming labored, "Shit..." he huffed.Without warning, he held her head against himself, cumming roughly in her mouth. She had expected as much, gagging slightly from the pressure. He leaned back, enjoying the after effects of his high. He pulled her up into his lap, his hand groping her ample chest and his mouth biting at her neck. She groaned in appreciation. Kid then reached downwards, checking to see how ready she was. He grinned, easily sticking two fingers into her, making her moan his name loudly. He teased her clit slowly for just a moment before he decided she was ready.The redhead didn't give her much time to recuperate before he had lifted the slender woman and threw her on the bed. "Ass up," he bit out, rolling a condom down on himself, knowing it was better to be safe than sorry and not wanting to leave surprises everywhere.He can't have recovered so quickly. Her butt was smacked hard, causing her yelp in surprise. "Ass up woman. I ain't asking again," Kid pulled her to the edge of the bed and lined himself up with her entrance, pushing in roughly.She screamed out harshly, feeling a overwhelming sensation of both pain and pleasure from his treatment. The tall man wasted no time in fucking the woman roughly, pulling at her long hair, making her neck stain backwards. He loved biting, starting at her shoulder and going up her neck. Mouth kisses were too intimate for him, but there were many other ways to use his lips.Sometime later, a thoroughly pleased man left, deciding to swing by the bar before heading back to his ship. Gods could that woman scream my name. Maybe I should've gotten hers. He thought was a devious grin, a swagger in his step.He ran into some of his crew milling about, all of them in seemingly high spirits. With nary a marine out, it was nice to relax. Maybe that gremlin's got a point in attacking them first, he thought, ordering a double shot of whiskey, on the rocks, slightly bothered at his train of thought. Don't want her on my mind right now. He quickly downed the shot and ordered another, relaxing for the evening. A few of his subordinates stopped by, laughing and joking like usual and one brave bar maid even flirted a bit, resulting in some groping and grinding on the dance floor. It was a nice night. Even with one arm, I still pull woman.At about a quarter to midnight was when he felt it, that twisting madness tinged with glee off in the distance. Just what's got the Professor so worked up? he thought not sensing anyone else. Fuck I just got the little shit off of my mind. Snagging a bottle of rum to go, the muscular man used his powers to quickly glide over to the western cliff in time to see a beached marine vessel be blown to bits. He had to shield his eyes, the flames were so bright. And then he heard it, mad cackling and a very upbeat number. There on the shore was a pile of loot and in-between those crates, the professor, twisting and turning, hopping about in sheer delight.Not wanting to alert her, he sat down and silently chuckled to himself. This loony little twat was actually dancing, like some demented leprechaun. Only instead of a pot of gold, stolen loot. In place of a rainbow, those sky licking flames. A metal leprechaun.Dr. Inator heard a deep guff, sounding like it was being muffled behind a hand. Glancing up discreetly, she saw her Captain, perched on the cliff, a bottle in his right hand. He's a nosy bastard isn't he?There wasn't anything she really needed, except the blender she found, but the gold and other supplies needn't go to waste. She turned off her radio and smiled to herself. By now, the man had jumped down, landing directly behind her. Does he enjoy playing predator?"You really do have it in for the Government don't ya?" he chuckled, sauntering over, a bit tipsy.Jam pauses, her cracked smile a reflection of a cracked mind. "Yep, stealing everything here and leaving a demolished base is my calling card. Sometimes when I'm lucky, a new ship will come along, and the absolute devastation in their faces when the base is just gone brings unfettered joy to my tiny dead heart," she giggles. Oh the fun I've had.He barked out a laugh, taking sip of rum. "So the base?"Tomorrow after I clear out a few things. You need any metal?""I always need metal," the tall man scoffed."The kitchen is full of crap too. I'm guessing the jerky king can be in charge of that," said Professor Inator with a smirk. Kid quirked a non-existent eyebrow at her. "That loser ran off with my dehydrator," she complained, folding her arms across her chest. Fucking lousy thief.Kid's burgundy lips split into a delighted grin, thinking of the delicious jerky Killer had made. "He's been using it nonstop. Sent Jaguar and Wire out to go hunting for more exotic game," the redhead laughed."I'm going to need to build another one then," she said pouting, having already anticipated this."You'd give it to him then just like that?" he asked snapping his fingers, knowing how happy it would make Killer."Preserving food means we have a stockade of emergency rations that are chalk full of nutrients. If that giant furball wants to do the work, who am I stop him? I hate cooking. Anyway, there's another industrial oven and plenty of fans back at the base. I'll just make another one later tonight. It's not a big deal."Kid focused his arm out at the ship's remains; some burned metal twisting towards him. Focusing his power he made a large metal box. "Put the loot in there and I can take it back to the ship later," he ordered.An eyebrow rose in surprise. "That's a sweet ability. Why make the guys carry the stuff back earlier then?""Feh some of those lazy bastards need the exercise. And its grunt work not Captain's work," he smiled arrogantly.She snorted. What an ego. Loading up the metallic container quickly she turned around, grabbing her radio and blender. Not expecting him to follow her, she furrowed her brow when she heard him stomping behind her. What does he want now? It was a silent walk back to the base, the sound of crunching snow the only noise for several minutes.Making her way inside, she headed straight for the kitchen, the ship's destruction resulting in her being peckish. She rummaged in the fridge grabbing some grapes and stuff for making a ham sandwich.Kid watched her like a hawk. "Make me some too. Captain's orders," he smirked, finishing off his bottle of rum.She snorted to herself. "What tired after screwing that whore?" He's bossy as hell. How hard is it to ask nicely you cunt?The smirk vanished from his face in an instant, a scowl emerging, and a questioning look present in his narrowed amber eyes. "You smell like cheap perfume," she clarified, tossing a plate and beer in his direction and sitting down herself, grabbing a coke instead.The copious amounts of liquor had loosened his tongue, making him even more apt than usual to talk. "Che, what business is it to you?" the redhead asked, taking a bite of the sandwich. Jealous perhaps? he thought with glee."I don't care. I hate bad smells is all," she sniffed dramatically."I don't stink---" he began, offended."Yeah for a pirate you're surprising clean," Professor Inator admitted. "You can smell some fucks from downwind. Smell 'em before you see them. Anyway, you should pay attention to that. If they coat themselves with that much perfume they probably don't shower between clients. Ew," she said with a shutter.Kid pursed his lips, "Oh and how do you know that? Been a working girl?"She bristled at his accusation and mocking tone. "Whorehouses are good sources of rumors and information you pig. And I'm only informing you to warn you. It would do me no good to find a crew only for you to die from screwing a dirty hoe.""Che," he snorted. "I wear a condom. I'm not brain dead."Jam rolled her eyes and started eating, removing her gloves and lowering her collar. Kid, never one for silence had to keep at it. "You think you're better than girls like that?"She frowned, wondering how much to reveal to him. "Not exactly, at least not for the reason you're thinking. I am better than most people, but that's because of my talent not because of their life choices. I feel bad for poor women forced into that line of work. I also don't think it's my business to judge women who want to perform that work, especially considering the shit I get up to. But I've encountered more than my fair share of brothel workers who are absolute cunts. And I'm big on germs so the perfume thing makes me gag. I know sometimes they don't have a choice; there's little time between clients, but fuck that's gross," she said, making a face.Nibbling on her sandwich, she continued, "I stayed on island of Hakken for over a year, studying under an established scientist. There was a brothel nearby that functioned as an information hub. Dr. Erlenmeyer, my mentor, loved his whores and was especially fond of a woman named Carmen. She always gave me grief, calling me prude, ugly, bitch, you name it. She assumed I looked down on her from the get go and treated me like trash. She also hated it when the Doc praised my work. It irked her. But the hell if I was interested a man older than my dad. All I wanted was to learn. Woman was delusional. But I quickly grew to hate her too. She had way too much control over my mentor and it made my life difficult. I just couldn't fathom how such a smart man would subject himself to her whims. The amount of research funds he wasted on that cocksucker," Jam sighed, thinking of all the stupid projects she had to do only to realize her great mentor was squandering their wealth on foolish short-sighted desires. The experiments that got canceled because of that horn-ball makes my blood boil even now.Finishing her sandwich, the scientist continued, "Carmen had another women there try and sell me to a decrepit lunatic after a pretty nasty argument. That was a fun evening. Fifteen year old me fell for stupid shit from time to time. So I'm a bit salty, sue me." She threw her hands up in exasperation."You were tricked by a dumb whore?" Kid asked, a bit of glee slipping into his voice, already having inhaled his plate of food.The woman scoffed. "She wasn't dumb. For weeks she played nice and told me what a bitch Carmen was. Felt like we bonded. She told me I could have a meeting with a broker upstairs who could supply me with lithium. She was kind and said she set it up to help me and because it gave her a cut. The story was believable and I really needed a new supplier. I went and was surrounded by the freak's friends, who all wanted a turn at breaking me in," she shuddered at the memory. Old guy was disgusting."Got away and hid for a week recovering. Told the other junior scientists I got attacked in an alleyway. I poisoned those two cunts and lit the brothel on fire. My stupid mentor was inconsolable." That was a shitty week.He whistled in morbid appreciation. "A killer at fifteen. Got you beat though. First kill at lucky number thirteen," he gloated, making finger guns with both arms. That fuckhead should have never attacked Killer.The professor nodded in assent. "World's fucked. You do what you gotta."Frowning, he decided to get to his issue with her attitude. "Lots of the crew makes use of brothels. One of 'em used to work at one. Don't go insulting shit you know nothin' about," he ordered.Jam crossed her arms over her chest. "I wasn't insulting sex workers. You perceived it as an insult because you're sensitive," she mocked, annoyed with his tone."I ain't SENSITIVE! he bellowed.She stood up and yelled back, "Yes the fuck you are, you hothead!"He then stood up, towering over the petite woman. "Say that shit again, you mouthy bitch!"Professor Inator saw red, hopping nimbly onto the table so she could glare at him directly. To anyone watching it would have been hilarious. "You are a hotheaded contemptuous bastard," she said, enunciating each word with a poke to his chest.Still a bit intoxicated, he swung wide and missed. "Don't poke at me with your pointy little nails!" he hissed.Smirking to herself, Jam raised her hand quickly bypassing his defenses to jab her finger in his side, making him grunt. Kid was slower and missed his chance to stop her but used his metallic hand to grab at her other hand. Yanking her forward like a ragdoll, he used her momentary confusion to snatch her other hand and pin them together, pulling her down off the table, just to spite her. "Ha! No poking!"He felt rather proud of himself until he became aware of what kind of position she was in. The petite woman was stretched out, her hands above her head, her feet dangling slightly off the floor, and her chest pushed forward, so much so that even with her loose coat he could see definite proof of a feminine chest..."Let go of me you shitty barbarian!" she screamed, angry he was lording his height over her. He's got ten seconds before I kick the shit outta him.Kid meanwhile was fighting back his embarrassment, his face reddening. Those have to be some nice sized tits if I can see them with that bulky coat. Crap, her hands are soft. Struggling with himself, he threw her away from his body, causing her to stumble backward.Clearing his throat he said, "I am NOT sensitive. I just don't need you starting shit with another crewmember."Jam huffed, thoroughly irritated with the redhead's antics. Fucking tosspot. If it weren't for the lab and his cool powers I'd punch him smack dab in his stupid face. "Whatever," she hissed, righting her lab coat and stepping away. She popped her wrist and back in a huff. Huh, that stretch was good for something. Loosened up my muscles from all that hunching over I did earlier gathering materials. Still wanna punch his ugly mug though.Kid shifted from foot to foot. Did I injure her wrist? Fuck. "That didn't hurt you or anything?" He tried not to fight seriously with crewmembers as he sometimes forgot his own strength especially with his mechanical arm.The short woman sighed, "I'm not made of glass, idiot. I can handle you just fine. I was tense from all the work I earlier; you just stretched me out." Before he could say anything else, she abruptly added, "Anyway, it's late as fuck. I'm going to sleep. Night," and stomped away. Grouchy uncouth bastard. I get his concern for this people; it's kinda cute he cares so much. Doesn't mean he gets to be a dick to me.For a moment he stood there dazed. She runs off when she's upset. Probably got mad I dragged her off the table. She had to stand on a table to be taller than me. She's ridiculous, he thought chuckling to himself.Having no reason to stay, he left after that, a yawn escaping him. Stopping near the now burnt down ship, he attracted the box of goods he made and brought it to his body, setting in on his shoulder before ambling to his ship. He left the stuff on the deck, heading for his cabin and passing out promptly.-----------------------------------Dreams were a funny thing. The mind could take random tidbits of real life and splice them into a full-fledged event. Kid dreamed often; his mind ablaze with ideas and hopes. New builds, destroying enemies, finding the One Piece...Hell as a horny bastard he even had a fair share of naughty dreams, usually starring a faceless beauty or some combination of woman he had been with. But tonight, all his mind could focus on were piercing coffee eyes holding his gaze, delicate fingers gripping his thighs, and a lovely purple pout sucking on his throbbing---The tall man awoke with a hiss, angry at himself. The fuck is this shit. I got turned on by that? I don't know what her face fully looks like. I screwed that bitch at the brothel, what is wrong me? Stupid fuck ass Killer putting the idea of banging the bitchy gremlin in my head.Still grumbling, he reached down finding himself rock hard. With practiced ease, he gripped his thick member, building up a steady pace. He made an attempt at picturing the busty piece of ass from the brothel but his mind wouldn't let up on the little professor's image. It's her fault too for the shit she talked about.He had brief flashes of the dream conversation he had with Jam. "Better than some dirty whore. I'm not tired out from fucking half the goddamn town. We can go as long as your pitiful ass can keep up," she said glaring up at him.Inside his cabin, he blushed heavily. Why the fuck did he have to find her attractive? Another glimpse of his dream had him reeling. "You can be as rough as you like, I can handle it," she teased. Kid began grunting, picking up speed with his pumping. "Want me to take off my coat so you can see how big my tits are? Or maybe let you poke me back for earlier?" His dick began leaking pre-sum like crazy, her teasing tone sending him into overdrive. "You really like to stretch me out, huh?" she purred.It wasn't long after till he came, his breathing labored. God damn it, felt like I came harder from that than with the screamer from earlier. He grabbed a towel from the side of his bed and cleaned himself off, having gotten ejaculate all over his hand and stomach. He ran his fingers through his hair, sweating slightly. The sun was already up, yellow rays peaking in to the room. Making his way to his personal bathroom, he decided to shower and get ready for the day.Breakfast was damn near silent, the crew noticing how distracted their leader looked, lost in his thoughts. While he didn't seem angry, more confused than anything, they all decided to give him space. He ate slowly, sipping his coffee and mulling over his plans for today. Peering into the cup, he was reminded of the little woman's eyes and promptly frowned. "Hip, get me some juice!""Certainly boss. Right away," the blonde woman jumped up, eager to assist her Captain.This place is too peaceful. He was damn near done with the basic setup for the lab and there were no enemies in sight. It was fucking with his mind..."Kid?" Killer asked, tilting his head. What's wrong with him? He never drinks juice unless there's alcohol involved."Hm?""You've been staring off into space for ten minutes. You good?"The amber eyed man grunted and chugged down his orange juice. The blonde wisely thought to let it be. Sometimes Kid just wasn't a morning person. "Thought we should shop today and restock. We really don't need too much, especially with all that loot and the new shit we found on the deck this morning, but everyone needs a few odds and ends. Coming?"Kid nods, stretching his long limbs, following his best friend and a few of his crew members off the ship. The town had since put two and two together and realized that the marine base was no more, most likely the result of their pirate guests. Wisely, they decided to play it cool and hope for the best.Suffocating nervousness was the feeling prevailing the town, but it was contained enough to not upset the pirates. Yuki no Namida was a small town, but they prided themselves on having a nice selection of basic supplies, as it kept the visitors happy and less likely to cause destruction. Retail therapy had soothed the muscular man somewhat, goofing off with his buddies was always a riot.They had purchased all kinds of random stuff, and still hadn't put much of a dent in their stash. Things were looking up for once. "All we need now is perishables, but we'll get those on the last day here," said Killer, checking over the supply list Clash and Bubblegum put together.Kid smirked, his lips stretching out to grin at his best friend. "The Professor said the Jerky King could clean out the base's kitchen."Killer scratched his chin scuff. "Not a bad idea. Free is free. Mad I took her machine?"The younger man waved his partner's concerns off. "Naw, said she'd build another. You can keep the one you stole.""Really?!" the tall blonde practically squealed, before calmly coughing and adding, "So she can be levelheaded. Good." It's all mine? Ooh I can take my time drying out some spices for later.Kid rolled his eyes fondly at his dorky friend. "Volunteered you to make snacks with it," the redhead teased till he remembered he was thinking about her again, if only tangentially. Fuck, I was just focused on food."Speaking of snacks, we getting lunch?" Jaguar whined. It's been ages since breakfast."That bar from our first day here wasn't bad. Let's go," Kid replied, always hungry himself.The large crew worked those cooks ragged, all of his mates having voracious appetites. But it had been delicious. The poor staff was exhausted when the group left, shutting down the place as they were low on lots of ingredients."When is the gremlin joining us?" Wire asked, staring off in the distance.Kid shrugged, not wanting to think of her anymore today. Goddamn it Wire."It's too bad this small island doesn't have anything to do," sighed Papas, kicking a rock."Emma said that waitress told her it's always been a peaceful town," added Snare, bored as well. There wasn't much to do here. Not even any good shops to visit. And I needed more fabric.Making his way back to the ship, Kid was surprised to see the Professor on the docks with several bags, sitting on her new dehydrator. Speak of the fucking devil and she shall appear...------------------------------------As of the Egghead Arc, we learn energy is a precious resource, making her bio-fuel an invaluable asset. I know it's not possible to do in the time span she does, but hey science-fiction guys. Solent green is people. And I do base it partly on real life science---they turn dead people into diamonds for jewelry. It's insane. They're called Ash Diamonds.Kid and lots of his crew wear makeup. He can't be dirty. His hair is styled back and he clearly wears nail polish, eyeliner, and lipstick. And with that stump he would have to be clean, least he risk infection. Killer's hair would be a rat's nest without proper care. Plus with six canonically confirmed ladies, I don't think the ship is filthy. Not perfect and it definitely gets coated in blood and guts during battle, but the crew keeps it tip top. So many authors make them grimy as fuck. Like not a little grimy, but downright disgusting.Kid is a great character and the crew he has looks interesting. I love the interactions we've seen, especially how they copied Killer's laugh he's insecure about. Kid does not want to like Jam as anything more than a useful crewmember. He's doesn't want those type of feelings for anyone. Mindless sex is fine. Feelings, fuck no. His brain is warping their conversation to be naughty much to his annoyance. This punk likes her spunk.Kid does in fact canonically have the type of Haki that allows him to sense opponents. That's how he knows Luffy lost in Wano. And in 1079 that's how come Kid looks so surprised when Shanks appears right in front of him. Apparently Shanks can kill off an opponent's Observation Haki making it easy for him to sneak up on them.Jam is judgmental. Very much so. Sometimes she's a total bitch. I want her to feel real, with real faults based on her life experiences. Highly intelligent, highly immature most of the time. Kind as she pleases, cruel as she feels, she is a manipulative emotional roller coaster. That's how I designed her and she'll stay true to form. She will grow; character growth is important, but this account is to help me as a writer work on characterization without being all over the place. Jam will dislike characters I adore because of her nature. She will shit-talk them and maybe even try to kill them. It all depends.Sorry it took so long to update. I write outside under a tree sometimes and I got some type of bug bite on my ear. Luckily it wasn't in deep. The swelling gave me crazy headaches though. And now I'm hesitant to sit outside...
Spoilers for 1081:
00000000000000000000000000000000WTF Oda! First the Victoria Punk and now the Polar Tang?! I'm hoping the Heart Pirates are ok the same as with the Kid Pirates. Just Law and Bepo making it isn't worth shit in my opinion. Like Kid, Law would be devastated if his crew perished. Don't Gecko Moria anyone!Several people are like oh well then Law and Kid can join Luffy. That's bullshit and a bad choice that seemingly caters to the fandom but cripples the storyline. Luffy already has a prior captain in Jimbe, two more is overkill. Plus I like him having rivals as so many manga fuck up with the MC and leave them alone in terms of power at the end. That's so boring. I love their shit-talking and taunting to one another; a subordinate doesn't do that.I like the fight between Garp and Aokiji. Who is greater the mentor or the mentored? I'm not even mad at Blackbeard---he's a well written villain who plays his part well. I don't like the whole ten members and other Luffy parallels. It makes BB feel like his rival and just dumps the supernovas. Oda had better not. BB is 40, one year older than Shanks, so I don't consider him part of Luffy's generation and therefore ineligible to be a rival. He is current pillar of strength, one to be toppled over by the new generation. He's literally been a pirate since he was child.Sulong Bepo was so cool and proof Wano was rushed because hwy else didn't we see him there? I hate the whole Killer ate a Smile so he can't swim and save anyone...I hoping another member saves everyone or maybe even some other giants. I feel it's going to be some time before we hear anything on our two supernova captains. I really want to see Sabo too...I was asked to put together a composite list of the cannon proof (as in manga panels, screenshots, SBS info, etc) I use to interpret characters, specifically for Kid and Law. I'm considering it; it would be fun. But I don't believe it would pull any interest? Thoughts?
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Kid took a slow calming deep breath, his action catching the eyes of his crewmembers. They had a great day out and its' not like Professor Inator did anything wrong. Internally grumbling, he scoffed at the small woman, "You done with your other shit?"Her eyes narrowed. What crawled up his ass and died? Still pissy about last night maybe? "Yes. You done with the lab?" I hope this is worth it.He motioned for her to follow, and jumped up to the ship. She grabbed her bags and was about to pick up her dehydrator when a pale blue hand stopped her. "I will get this. Follow after Master Kid, he moves fast," Heat muttered. She smiled, thanking him.Large pounding footsteps descending into the bowels of the ship. Tiny soft steps scampered after. Finally the pair reached their destination, deep in the bowels of the Victoria Punk. Kid pushed open a large door and led his newest addition inside."Told you my design was better, woman," he grinned, his usual cocky demeanor making its presence known. She's quiet, absolutely astonished by my skills, he thought arrogantly.Jam took it all in. She had an examination/torture table off to the side. A ceiling-reaching bookshelf covering the entire left wall. A large preparation area on the right wall with a sink.It's beautiful. She jumped over and hugged the bewildered man, causing him to freeze up. "Pirates don't hug, you wack-ass weirdo!""Don't be such a baby. Its only a hug. And I thought pirates do whatever the hell the please," she mocked.Kid grumbled, a large red blush covering his face. "Don't do it again."Jam clicked her teeth, but was too excited to really care. "It's a lovely lab and yes your design was superior," she relented with a long-suffering sigh. I guess you do deserve some praise.Kid smirked, pleased with himself. "I've got shit to do. You get situated today and then tomorrow talk with Quincy and Pomp, my medical team, to see what they need. Those two liked the healing balm you gave me and wanted to know what else you could make.""I have plenty of medical based knowledge. I'll chat with them soon.""We'll discuss builds and shit when I'm good and ready. Later," the tall redhead huffed, heading out.When the large Captain had left, Jam waited a few minutes before shrieking happily. The next several hours were spent unpacking her things and setting up her lab. He even had cabinets for holding all my chemicals! She checked for listening devices or a camera, happy she found none. The aerosolized salt mixture was one of her favorite inventions.By the end of it, she flopped down on her new bed and rolled about. I suppose I should reciprocate. I'm going to need to properly thank that giant loudmouth. He's going to be smug about it...or blush again like the delicate tulip he is. He's so fun to mess with.Dashing up, she climbed up the stairs, making her way to the deck. The ships layout was straightforward, making it easy to navigate. True she only knew how to get to her room/lab and the deck but for now that was good enough.There were tons of people milling about. It's so weird to have others around after so long. Well others that I'm not planning on killing. Blonde, bubbly pigtails invaded her vision as a woman shorter than herself halted her progress. "Hi, I'm Dive," an upbeat voice said.Jam's eyes narrowed in remembrance. She's part Fishman, probably like an 1/8th or 1/16th most likely piranha by those chompers she has. "The biter?"Black lips pouted cutely. "You burnt my mouth." That shit was painful. Wonder if I bite her now would it burn..."You're not the first person who tried to eat my amorphous blob form. It's a defense mechanism," the slightly taller woman answered.The blonde haired woman shrugged. "You looked liked jelly. It was worth a shot."Jam laughed at her simplemindedness."Your jerky maker was the shit," Dive continued never one for long silences.The Professor rolled her eyes. "It's a dehydrator.""Details, details. Anyway, it's dinner time, you need to come to the gallery and eat before those pigs destroy the kitchen," Dive said, wrinkling her nose."I grew up with seven idiot baby brothers. I'm sure its fine. And I watched Killer eat yesterday. You gonna tell me someone is worse than him?" Jam snorted.Dive giggled, "You're kinda funny. You should see him eat cake with frosting."Cackling escaped the scientist, picturing the scene."Speaking of Killer, he told me you are good at slipping into bases and gathering information. I'm the ship's scout meaning the two of us will be working together a lot. Figured I should get to know you before we get assigned to a task."Jam hummed thoughtfully. "Ok. Lead the way."The Gallery and kitchen were on the same level as the deck. It was noisy until the two short ladies walked in. Most of the crew was assembled, already in the midst of chowing down. Dive, being the social butterfly she was, pushed the other woman forward.It took all of Jam's willpower not to giggle at Killer, wearing a frilly white apron from his spot at the stove. Kid cleared his throat, drawing all eyes to himself. "You need to meet everyone properly. Roll call shitheads." One by one the crew stood and announced their names, some striking a pose even.Jam nearly fainted from the sheer ridiculousness. These are battle harden bloodthirsty pirates? They are so fucking goofy. Don't laugh. Oh god this is hard. Thank Davy Jones they can't see my face. I'm the science nerd but these people are dorks!Dive pulled her along to sit next to herself and Reck. Soon a plate was pushed in front of her and chatter resumed. It was jarring. Dinner consisted of a heavy stew with nice big pieces of fresh bread on the side. As before, she removed her gloves and undid the collar of her coat. Had she been paying attention, she would have noticed the sly looks her crew sent her way. She took a bite, "It's wonderful."Dive nodded in agreement, spooning some soup in her mouth. "Killer really knows his shit. His food is the absolute best." Dive went on to explain who was on the cooking crew and what they typically made. "Skillet made the bread. His desserts are phenomenal."Jam hummed, thinking of all the yummy treats she could request from this Skillet. Need to make his acquaintance properly. Eating slowly and listening to Dive prattle on was nice. The pigtailed woman told her she would need to give the professor a tour of the ship afterwards so she knew where everything was. As soon as she finished eating, the smaller woman tugged the arm of her new namaka along, giving her a brief but animated overview of the ships layout.--------------------------Sleep never came easy to Jam who usually worked till she passed out. She had tried lying down but it just wasn't happening. This was just too new; working with people and not lying in wait to kill them. Sighing she got up, deciding to make progress on a detonator for that base. Pulling her tools out of the new cabinet she got to work diligently making the innards of the device. Turning her radio on low she bobbed her head while she worked.What she wasn't aware of was the presence of a Den-Den Mushi in the vents right above her. The Kid Pirates had never watched a new namaka before, but it was hard to completely trust someone with the kind of abilities they knew she possessed. Killer could usually get a read on others easily. Professor Jam Inator was an unnerving mystery and her intelligence made him uneasy.Personally, Bubblegum thought Killer was mad he could no longer claim being the smartest person on the ship anymore. Not that he'd ever say that aloud. Value my head where it is, thank-you very much.The transponder snail was carefully placed to only watch the lab but not her bedroom; they weren't creeps. Killer figured Jam would check for bugs at first, but believed afterwards they were good to go. Wire placed it down right after dinner while Dive gave her the tour."So we serveil her for what two weeks?" Wire asked.A long blonde mane nodded. "That's about how long it will take us to leave here and reach the next island. We will make our final decision then." Everything seems fine but we need to be cautious."Wonder what she's making?" Dive asked."It's hard to tell, but damn she's quick. I bet it's easy to work on machines that contain several moving components with such teeny hands," said Mosh with a grin.For the next several hours the majority of the crew watched her work in astonishment. She set up her dehydrator and got to work properly making some new basic compounds. While the machine went, she pulled out the ones she already had and got to work mixing things, puffs of colored smoke and bubbling liquids fascinating her onlookers. She would ping-pong back to working on some type of machine seemingly at random but always was in time to set up the next step in an ongoing chemical reaction. Clearly Professor Inator knew what was she was doing. I'm kinda low on paralysis gas and my main pharmaceuticals.Soon Jam had a decent stock of base chemicals and what not. Every motion she made was carefully controlled, like an overly precise dance. Her work felt more art than science. There was something hypnotic about the fluid way she moved. It was beautiful until the cackling began. As she neared the completion of the device, she began mumbling to herself. The crew caught words and phrases like die, fucking peons, rat-bastard, and suffering to the ninth degree. Then it evolved into almost a full blown muttered conversation with herself. "Don't put in the power supply yet, some idiot might fuck with it. Never making that mistake again.""Shit, I need more materials already.""You put the wire in the coconut and blow it all up," she sang.Kid was floored. Jam was clearly crazy as all hell, but fuck was she interesting to watch. She dances while she works. Stupid coat getting in the way of watching the midget shake her ass.He wasn't the only one observing her movements closely. Snare rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "You know, I don't think she's some fat potato gremlin. She's curvy and she hides her feminine physique under that bulky ugly ass labcoat," the tall man concluded.Hip and Joplin glared at the man, but Snare was never one to be deterred. "I sew so I'm damn good at eyeballing someone's size. I know my body types. 'Sides she fights like a champ. Of course she's fit.""Yeah but why hide her body if she's nice and curvy?" asked Emma."Science is a male dominated field. It she wants to focus on her work she probably doesn't want any extra attention. Fuck maybe she's shy or something," Bubblegum answered."Could be deformed in some manner. A lab accident perhaps," Forte muttered."Or just ugly," Hip giggled.Papas snorted. "No she's hot. The crazy ones always are and little Miss Talks to Myself is barmy as they come."Hip sneakily stomped on his foot. "Shut-up," she hissed."Hey don't get mad at me. I don't make the rules of the universe," the hoodie-wearing mad exclaimed. You're just upset the captain is watching her booty bounce."Quiet. What she looks like has no bearing on anything. She's a fucking scientist, a dangerous one at that. Now pay attention to what she's making and quit playing hot or not you idiots," Killer snapped, reprimanding everyone, looks being a sensitive topic to the masked man.With that the idle chatter ended and they want back to trying to see what their newest member was constructing.As three o' clock drew nearer, Professor Inator giggled and lovingly cradled her completed device. "We will have so much fun tomorrow won't we?" she cooed in a baby voice. "Nothing like a new Inator to test."The small woman stretched, looking over at the clock. The scientist sighed and went to her room to grab some toiletries and a change of clothes. She traveled up two floors to the bathrooms, running into Boogie who had been instructed to see what she was up to. Noticing the items in her arms he asked, "Taking a shower?" Got me and Clash running after her at three in the morning for nothing. Ooh a bath, how suspicious."Yeah, why?" she asked, genuinely confused as to why he cared."Kinda late?" he replied, tapping his foot."I'm a night owl," the short woman shrugged, walking into the bathroom. The restroom had a large pool sized bath for those that wanted to soak and hang out with other people and several single shower stalls for the more private individuals on the crew. Jam chose a single stall and quickly undressed, letting the hot spray soothe her. She took a quick rinse off, wanting to sleep after an eventful day. And I still need to setup my precautions just incase. Eugh.She toweled off in the stall and redressed quickly, throwing a tank top and pair of panties on before sliding into her lab coat. She wrapped her hair in the towel and put her hood up.When she exited, Clash was there, directly outside of the door. Jam was startled. "Sorry, just heard noise and no one really bathes this late. Just checking," the tall woman chuckled nervously. Already back into your coat, huh? I don't like this monitoring. I know she's deadly and a scientist can be unpredictable but this is weird. If she was going to try anything, why wait?"I always shower super late. It's not a problem is it?""No. No. Was curious is all," the woman said, waving off the other's concerns.The professor shrugged. "Ok. Night." Jam side stepped the tall woman, heading back to her room. Everyone here is so bizarre. After a quick booby-trap setup she removed her lab coat and got under the covers. The giant fuzzy blue and purple blanket she bought was heavenly. Soon she was passed out, a soft smile on her face.--------------------------------The next day saw everyone lazily waking up. Breakfast was quiet as too many people stayed up far later than they were used to, spying on their new crewmember. Those that had night watch were filled in and left to sleep till noon. Lucky bastards.Kid sent Killer and those on cooking duty to gather up all the food left at the base. Kid himself went with Heat and Wire to tear out all the useful metal afterwards. The structure was pretty much done for, a carcass of brick, stone, and wood left behind. He hadn't seen Jam since they spied on her last night. He felt a little weird about it. She definitely fit the archetype of a mad scientist.Today he was going to check out the weapons store and see if they had anything cool in there. Killer, Heat, Boogie, Hop, and Clash would be accompanying him. Everyone on his crew loved sharp and pointy things but these guys really loved weapons. The shopkeep nearly shat himself when they entered.The day itself had been fine. Bubblegum redid their budget, the numbers looking great. He planned to visit the brothel again later to let off some steam. Everything was good...so why did he feel out of sorts?--------------------------------Jam was ecstatic that none of her alarms were triggered during the night. They didn't try anything. That's a first. Disabling them all, she got dressed properly and headed down to breakfast. It was nearing ten but there were only a handful of people in the kitchen. Guess they're all late risers. I only need five to six hours of sleep to function. She saw Moai and Skillet at the stove, heaps of eggs, toast, oatmeal, and bacon already prepared. Helping herself to a plate, she ate quickly, noticing how tired everyone looked.Whitney snorted in her head. The Professor is fine. Up and dandy like she didn't go to bed at half past three. I need my beauty rest. As soon as the others leave I'm taking a nap.Heat eyes were more sunken in than usual, his cup of coffee doing little to stifle his yawns. UK was grumpy and seeing the little woman practically flounce in the kitchen just irked him. "You sure are chipper, ain't you?" he groused.Jam stopped eating her oatmeal and glanced at the large man. "I'm not usually a morning person but it was nice to sleep in my own bed for once. Just in a good mood I suppose.""So where do you usually sleep?" Compo quietly asked."It depends. When I stowaway I hide in random spots so wherever I fit really. Airvents, behind crates, on top of shelves, in cabinets, in between things. Sometimes in beds at the bases but those cheap things are uncomfortable as hell. In a tent with a sleeping bag when I hit a deserted island or an inn when I find one inhabited," the Professor explained."That can't be comfortable," Reck added. I'd die without my bed. Screw that.Jam shrugged, swallowing a mouthful of eggs. "I've been a one woman army for almost six years. I've never had anyone to watch my back so sleep was a luxury at times. And when I did try and join a crew, I'd usually wake up to chains or a cage. Which is funny because out of all the people I've encountered, ol' gear head left me alone and he controls metal. Would have been easy as pie to restrain me in my sleep if he wanted," the woman said carelessly to the crew's horror.In chains or a cage? Attacked while asleep? No wonder she's a bit off, thought House, feeling bad for the other woman.Heat quickly replied, "The Captain's not like that. He doesn't attack namaka."Clash nodded. "And he fights upfront; he would never just attack a sleeping person. He might kick 'em awake first and then fight, but no sneak attacks.""Good to know," Jam replied, going back to her breakfast. He's supposedly one of the most ruthless pirates round and he has more morals than most of the scum I've met. What a strange man you are Eustass Kid.----------Jam had finished her device around midday, sometime before lunch. Setting it aside for later, she went exploring on the ship. Dive had pointed out the main attractions, but there were still so many places to check out. Leaving her room, she opened the door and peaked her head outside. Her lab was at the bottom of the ship so it stood to reason the engine was somewhere close by. Directly across from her was a large door with the words KEEP OUT: WORKSHOP written across it in bold red lettering.She snickered, how juvenile. He feels the need to put up a sign like some upset teenager. His crew should know to keep out. Walking down further she saw a two other small doors. The first was a storage room and the second housed the ship's engine.Her brown eyes glowed with anticipation as she gingerly patted the machine. Oh what fun I'm going to have, examining you. Giggling to herself, she got to work. An hour later, she was enthralled. This is a beautiful piece of engineering. And bolts for brains even numbered you. Means he keeps track of his devices and designs. The man is much smarter than his appearance suggests. I've hit the jackpot."I'm going to need to design a power adaptor for my bio-fuel crystals but this is going to be awesome!" she hummed happily, heading back to her lab to work on a blueprint.-------------------It was late, nearing eleven when he saw the little shitstain emerge from her lab and hightail it off the ship. "Che doesn't she know she can't just up and leave?" he grumbled aloud."Where are you going?" he shouted at her retreating figure.He probably loves explosions. "To finish off the base and test out my new annihilator. You should come see," she offered, a large satchel on her back."No one goes off on their own woman. It's a safety thing. If you're going to leave, tell someone where you're going. Better yet, take someone with you," he ordered."Ok, ok. No need to get your tits in a twist."Kid frowned, biting at his lip in aggravation. "They're pecs, not tits, dumbass."The woman rolled her eyes behind her goggles and stifled a giggle. Not sensitive my ass.It didn't take long for the two to arrive at the base's remains. Jam hopped down and set up three small blue remote activated bombs around the perimeter of the structure. Running back to the cliff, she pulled out the device was working on last night.Kid glanced over at the little potato gremlin. Up close the machine in her hand looked like a detonator with a single large gleaming red button. "Hm, you just had to make it a big red button," he snorted. Why do scientists always make the button red?"Red's just a dangerous color, don't you agree?" she teased, looking up at his hair. "So is it really The Big Button if it's not a Big Red Button?" she grinned mischievously, her canines peaking out of her purple lips "You wanna push it Captain?"It was the first time she addressed him as such. It made his skin tingle and flush as crimson as her device. The way she spoke, enunciating the word felt strangely naughty but as to why, Kid couldn't pinpoint the exact reason. Whatever the case, he knew she was teasing him and felt his words still in his throat, managing to grab the device to show his assent instead.Her grin grew wider, her glee infectious. "Put those goggles of yours on, the blast will be intense," she instructed, turning her radio on. Wordlessly, he complied with her request, strands of vermillion hair falling down, framing his face.Pressing the button, the building lit up brighter than the sun it seemed, an intense icy white beam shooting up as far as the eye could see. There was nothing left. As if the structure never existed in the first place. His jaw dropped in disbelief, his eyes popping out of his head. She's a monster. Beside him the tiny woman was laughing, her hands in the air, as she began to pivot on one foot, lunacy evident in every move she made. Up close he could see the dance had a clear rhythm, the sway of her hips matching the toe-tapping song playing.No shit the government didn't want to admit someone was doing this to their outposts and bases. Bitch is psycho deadly. I prefer to beat an enemy up close and personal. Jam will be my secret weapon then. She can fight normally but this kind of firepower is for last resort type situations. Feh, crazy woman just has to shake her shit. He raised his arm and air-palmed in the direction of the dancing loon, sticking his tongue out as he did. That ass of hers would fit nicely in my hands.Shaking his head to rid himself of that line of thought, he stared at the scorched earth left behind, the only proof anything happened. I wonder how the marines would feel knowing she kills their soldiers, destroys their shit, and then celebratory dances? Probably piss them the fuck off, he snorted internally.The song she played ended, the woman giving one last high pitched joyful yell. "I forgot about the tremors...think we woke up the whole island," she sang out with a giggle.His hairless brow rose. "We?" Kid asked astounding by her audacity."Hey you pushed the button," she taunted, hands on her hips. He liked that. His mouth damn near touched the ground. Wonderful. Our destructive abilities often scare people away.Loud stomping and a huffed shout interrupted the two. "Kid, are you alright?" Killer wheezed, several crewmembers behind him.The redhead frowned. "Why wouldn't I be?" he growled.It took all of Killer's patience not to scream. "That explosion. It shook the entire island. Was blinding as fuck and I have my mask.""We destroyed the base," Jam giggled evilly. Ah the party-pooper patrol.The crew was in astonishment. This was what she was working on last night."That base was as good as gone. What you did was wasteful," the blonde man grit out, angry he had gotten worried over his best friends safety. Leaving with her all alone. Fuck Kid think.The Professor snorted and blew the second-in-command off. "It only took me a few hours to make that device and it was cool as hell. Explosions are sick. And you clearly don't know how to cover up a crime, you twit. When you go somewhere you inadvertently leave behind an evidence trail. That trail can sometimes be used to figure out what you were up to. I don't want them to know anything about my plans, hence my need to DESTROY IT ALL. I ALWAYS DESTROY IT ALL!!!" she cackled maniacally, making the crew cringe.Oblivious to their discomfort, she further drove her point home. "Besides it's practical. The fewer bases in existence, the fewer resources the Government has. The less resources they have, the further thinly they're stretched and thus less likely to screw with us. It's only sensible to cripple them as much as possible. I don't even leave the framework behind for them to rebuild with. You see the idiots scratch their heads, 'Uh didn't we have a base here? Are we on the right island? What's going on.' It's a riot."Still in a giggly mood, the woman went back to dancing, not a care in the world. Killer smacked his helmet, making Kid chuckle. "Kid that was dangerous," he hissed. The island shook. The entire island you dumbass. And are you seriously watching her dance right now? You fucking horny moron."No it was a perfectly contained destructive beam. It was badass," the redhead said.The scientist nodded in agreement. "Oh and the detonator is reusable. I just need to manufacture more of my specialized remote bombs. So no, not wasteful," she defended.A stout man pushed himself forward, enamored by the blast. "I make my own bombs. Could I maybe push the button next time?" Pomp asked, admiring the device.Jam chuckled, "Yeah. Hell we can trade notes later."Killer wanted to scream. The poor residents of the island did as well.------------------------The next few days passed quickly, with Jam making a few more trips into town to get as many belongings as she could. Being on the move constantly prevented her from stockpiling personal items, clothes, and whatnot. Prior to her new arrangement, she only could carry her important discoveries and the base necessities. Like a treasure hoarding goblin, her room was soon filled with all manner of things to her absolute delight.The Professor sighed happily. So far so good. And if it goes sour, it's not like I haven't started over before. Still I'd love for this to work. The food's good, no one has tried anything to trigger my booby-traps while I sleep, and having a proper sit-down lab with storage is the best.The next morning the ship departed from the small island. Only time would tell if this was a good idea or not.-------------------------------I've read most of the Kid stories on this site. A lot of them make him suave but we all saw his behavior in Wano. The crass insults, the childish race/fight to do more work with Luffy, the over-eating, the smack talk with Big Mom, the banter with the other captains, all the crazy facial expressions...He has a very colorful personality. Can he be charming? Yes. But first he has to decide to and then he has to work at it. He's no smooth criminal; he's Jaggy.The Professor simply likes to discover new things and invent as much as possible. She is mad and a bit evil but mainly when it suits her, not just because. She can be helpful, kind even or just up and destroy it all. She's does love death and destruction.Pomp's design reminds me of a soldier, which is why I made him a field medic and gave him bombs. Dive bites an opponent at Wano in the manga and the only way to have teeth like that would be a devil fruit or by being part fishman.I plan on expanding my pairings; I already have several in mind within the crew and one with a Kid Pirate and another canon character. With that large a crew and the closeness they share, there are probably a few parings on board, especially since they started their journey at least two years before Luffy and have never split up. Any thoughts on who should get a romantic partner?
Spoilers:
000000000000000000000000000000000000I am really upset with the loss of the ship as of chapter 1079. I had all these plans and now I have to decide whether to go through with them knowing it will be destroyed, or just scrap my ideas. Ugh, Oda I could strangle you.1082 was cool. Buggy has always been a favorite. And it gave me new ammo for my Shanks is a shady bastard theory. Why wait twenty-four years to go after the One Piece? Poor Buggy, you can tell he looked up to his captain but it seems Shanks was the favorite. That's rough. I mean clearly Shanks was given the hat and taught Divine Departure and then to add insult to injury he refuses to go after the One Piece and follow Roger's legacy. Buggy probably felt betrayed. Some say Shanks has his reasons and yes he most likely does, but Buggy and he were practically raised as brothers; why not tell him those reasons? And if maybe he's guarding some dark unhappy truth Roger told him he could still have given his brother some type of rationale. But he does not and let's Buggy run off without going after him. Fuck except for Marine Ford they haven't interacted in over 22 years. That's insane and they were both in East Blue for the longest.1083 was interesting and I am glad Sabo is confirmed alive even though I figured he was. He is much more careful than Ace ever was. I think his relationship with Koala is so sweet. I'm glad we finally get to hear more about Dragon and his operations. Killing off their food supply is a decisive military tactic. Jam would approve. Oh my god, people are calling him Fed Hair Shanks because of that holy knight silhouette. Hehehehe.1084:I am liking the lore aspect of the chapter and the small bit about Bonney trusting the Revolutionary Army with her dad. Finally, Imu...it's getting good.
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The Kid Pirates had been at sea now for two days. The crew devised a spying schedule to better observe the Professor, ensuring less people were exhausted in the morning. She was interesting to watch, but most of the pirates felt that this was really unnecessary. Jam invented stuff. Exactly what, they didn't know, but she had yet to do anything to anyone. And some of the things she made turned out to be medicine for Quincy and Pomp to use."She's been sketching out something for ages. Looks like a metal box with buttons. What do you suppose it does?" Compo asked, squinting at the Den-Den Mushi image.His other two companions only shrugged. Compo, Mosh, and Emma were on spy duty tonight sitting together in the lounge."This is boring. I don't want to watch a nerd make junk. I don't even like watching the Captain build robots. The only good parts are when she backs that thang up," Emma grumbled, crossing her arms across her chest. Waste of my time. It's been days and all she's done is make medicine like the Captain asked, set up her space properly, and work on weird doohickey's.Mosh snorted. "Yer such a perv."The woman donned a lecherous grin. "You say that like it's a bad thing. And anyway, it's not like I'm the only one. Boss's eyes are glued to it.""We shouldn't talk about that. Boss wouldn't appreciate it," Compo said seriously."Yeah yeah." Suddenly her eyes lit up, a devious thought entering her mind. "You know I don't think the little gremlin even notices how hard his eyes follow her. Every time she comes out to eat, his eyes stray over to where she is. Only time he glances away is when he thinks Killer is watching," the woman sang out, enjoying the gossip."I'm sure it's not that bad," replied Mosh, rolling his eyes."The hell it ain't! He dropped food yesterday when she was giggling with Dive over something. Don't know how he missed that big ass mouth of his but he managed. And don't get me started on Hip.""She's being moody again?"Emma dramatically threw her head back. "IT'S AWFUL! She complains morning, noon, and night. Her and Joplin. I've done told them both that when Kid wants something he goes all out to get it. If he desired either of them, he'd have already done something about it.""Didn't they you know..." Compo asked, making rude gestures with his hands, blushing as he did so.The slender woman giggled. "Oh, they fucked once, years ago when Kid was in a bad place after Victoria died. Hip comes from the same island as Kid and bears a remarkable resemblance to Victoria. Bitch even keeps her hair short in the same hairstyle as Vicky had. It's a tad bit creepy, honestly."The two men turned to her, intrigued by her story. Sighing, she continued, "It was the first year anniversary of her death and Hip was babying boss while he was drinking like a fish. We all know how emotional the big lug gets when he drinks. Of course they fucked. He even accidently called her Vicky during the deed! But hell, she put herself in that position. After that Kid felt weird I guess and told her to pretend the whole fiasco never happened."Mosh whistled, "That's rough." Hip's really pretty; can't believe Kid just turns her down like that.Emma sucked in her teeth. "Don't feel bad for her. Hip does it to herself. It's not like she was taken advantage of. Kid was the one drunk.""You'd think looking like Victoria would make Kid want her," Compo added.Emma wagged her finger in the muscular man's face. "But that's the thing. Hip may look like Vicky but their personalities are completely different. It's why it doesn't work. Plus I think the boss wanted to move on and not dwell on the past. He can't be with someone who reminds him of a dead girl.""Hmm. What a screwy situation. So Hip moans about Jam then?""Uh-huh. Her and Joplin. Neither have spoken a single word to the Professor. And when Kid so much as glances her way, those two glare daggers at the woman. It's hilarious," she giggled."But I don't believe Jam even pays attention to the boss," said Compo."Nope which makes him stare even harder. What's that saying 'You want what you can't have.' I swear its making everyone involved bonkers.""Kid barely knows the Professor. Shit no one even knows what she looks like and she's not even close to his usual type. Wonder what's caught his eye?""Aside from her rear end, boss has always been attracted to strength. That little midget is dangerous. And demented. Hip and Joplin can both be cruel but their level of evil pales in comparison to what we know the Professor's capable of. Kid's just always been the type to play with fire," the blonde woman shrugged, knowing her boss well.Meanwhile the scientist finished her design and sighed, eager to sleep after such a long day. I was only going to get to this later when that oaf asked but when House informed me that the first thing to go was the hot water when the power ran out, I put my bio-fuel adaptor on top priority. The fuck if we're running out of power ever. The small woman stretched and yawned, heading to her bedroom."Huh it looks like she's done for the evening," said Mosh."Finally I'm beat and my bed's a calling. Night ya scrubs," Emma saluted her friends and hightailed it to the woman's quarters.-----------------------The next morning the Professor gathered her notes and headed to the kitchen for breakfast. She ate quickly and waited for her captain to enter, planning on cornering him while he was preoccupied wolfing down his food. He has the table manners of a wild boar.The tall redhead rushed in ten minutes later, making a beeline for his chair which already had a several plates and a steaming mug of coffee ready. Licking his lips, Kid dove into his breakfast, shoveling food down like his life depended on it. As a rule it was a bad idea to disturb the monstrous man whilst he ate especially while he consumed breakfast and before coffee had made him human. No one got in the way of Eustass Kid and food.A small pointy index finger interrupted his meal. "Hey I examined your engine and made a rough blueprint for a power adaptor. But I still have some questions. I didn't want to take apart the thing that runs the ship so I need to know how exactly you built it. If I can access the main power system I can retrofit an adapter to utilize my bio-fuel crystals," she demanded.He paused for split second, frowning at his subordinate. "I'm eating. Don't bug me during breakfast," he grumbled out, half awake."Aw, is someone not a morning person?" Jam snickered, causing the rest of the crew present to gasp.Kid clenched his teeth in response. "No sass, too fucking early you mouthy midget."The woman glowered, placing her notes down beside him. "Look you oaf, I worked hard on this as per your request. Check it out it and come get me from my lab when you're done," she said, walking out of the kitchen. Just had to call me a midget.The crew was floored. She insulted him and nothing happened. Kid was already focused back on his meal, smirking to himself knowing he won because she bolted in a huff.Twenty minutes later, a more alert Captain picked up the notes his scientist left behind. Studying the contents, he realized she had a decent grasp of the thought process behind his design. And she got all this without having to dissemble the engine. Bitch really knows her stuff. Getting up he headed down to her lab, figuring the Professor needed to earn her keep. The medicine is useful, but this is the reason I let her join.
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The duo spent hours in the engine room, talking about power sources, his engine blueprint, particular metal choices, style design, and potential upgrades to the electrical system of the Punk. Not once did he have to pause and explain something only to get a blank stare in return. The redheaded man was thrilled.Killer, Heat, Wire, and Emma had been listening outside the door. They caught snippets of the conversation between the two. Their leader sounded both excited and at peace."The engine runs smoothly most of the time but it does guzzle fuel like a motherfucker. Vicky's a greedy bitch," Kid said fondly, patting the engine lovingly."I've never thought to use magnets as a power source. Having multiple outlets of power was ingenious. We're halfway done with the adaptor.""As a backup, there are two large magnets on either ends that I can manipulate to provide an energy source for the Punk.""Being able to shape anything immediately without a torch and hammer is useful as fuck. You talented son-of-a-bitch," she praised making him flush red.It was baffling to Killer how relaxed Kid was. He's calm. Actually sounds like he's having a blast without fighting. All this time, and the missing piece to our puzzle was him having someone to talk mechanics with.She actually understands what he's going on about. No one can't compete against that, thought Emma.At close to one, House came down and informed everyone of lunch. "Should we tell the captain?"No. I'll grab those two plates and drop them off." I'll give them normal sized plates so I'll have an excuse to check in on them later and deliver more. Killer left and swiftly returned with lunch. "Kid, Jam, food," he shouted, pushing the door open.The duo were hunched over something sitting side by side on the workshop's main workbench which sat against the wall furthest from the door. Kid, wearing his goggles and thick leather apron looked up, a wrench in hand. Jam, in her green goggles and lab coat turned and grinned. Oh my god they bring me food. This is wonderful. I'd much rather build than cook. Ugh.The tall blonde set the plates down on the table in the middle of the room and carefully surveyed the workshop. Two rolling stools flew over, the food smelling delicious. "Thanks Killer, I'm starving."Nothing broken. There's been no yelling or fighting. They're just focusing on the task at hand. They had a medium sized metal box behind them with buttons and a lever. Must be the power thing. The workbench was covered in a ridiculous number of tools and both pirates had grease stains on their faces and arms. Kid grabbed two rags and wiped off before handing one to Jam to do the same. The pair dug into their food greedily, completely ignoring the third person in the room. Killer sighed to himself and left, eager to eat as well.---------------------------In the kitchen, the crew, sans their scientist and Captain, sat down to enjoy lunch. Halfway through, their second in command explained what the two were doing. "Kid's retrofitting the engine to be powered by those crystals the Professor makes," the blonde explained."That's just the most metal shit ever. Powering the Punk with the dead!" Boogie shouted. Thrill and Mosh joined in, the trio head-banging to a made up tune."So we'll have unlimited hot water?" Alt asked."When I told the professor that hot water is the first amenity to go, she about malfunctioned," House commented, sipping at her tea. I think she's a germaphobe."Shit I don't blame her. I hate cold showers. You never really feel clean if the water doesn't get hot," Quincy said. Cold water is murder on my curls."For real, that woman is a saint. I need my bubble baths to be pipin' hot," Forte agreed."So we'll be able to use all of blow dryers and straighteners whenever we want. No more conserving power?" Jaguar asked, hopeful."I suppose not," Killer answered, fully realizing what an unlimited power source would mean for their daily activities."Boss is the greatest! He found us the ultimate answer to our problems!" As a whole, the crew was fairly vain. Their outfits were custom, they wore make-up, and they all styled their hair in a particular way. Mohawks, liberty spikes, side bangs, and curls all took time to perfect in the morning. Hell Killer's immaculate blowout took ages to get just right.After the cheers died down a lone gravelly voice added his input. "We haven't heard one shout or grumble all morning," Heat shyly uttered. Silence met his declaration.Clearing his throat, and unable to deal with uncomfortable stretches of silence for long, Skillet rambled out, "I guess all he needed was an assistant." I've tried to be useful to the captain but there are so many tools and all those calculations make my head spin."We've helped him before," Joplin protested, with a few others nodding. Well until he gets angry and kicks you out...Bubblegum sighed. "Yeah but none of us understand what the fuck he's going on about. Jam does," he pointed out. "Plus she's not an assistant. She's an equal."Before fighting could break out over considering anyone equal to their beloved leader in any manner, the door slammed open as the topic of conversation sauntered in. Kid was grinning from ear to ear, carrying two empty plates. "Kill, we never have to worry about powering shit ever again. Those crystals are fly as fuck!"Fuck if he gets food, I have no reason to intrude. "So where's the runt?""She's busy fusing some parts together while I grab more grub. Building is hungry work," the redhead answered, stacking a serving platter as high as possible."Do you need any assistance boss?" Hip asked, politely, knowing he always needed someone to hand him tools and whatnot. I want to see how they're working together. She better not be all up on him.He waved his subordinate off, oblivious to her dejection. "No, we're almost done."The crew was perplexed. Kid ALWAYS let Hip aid him. She had been one of the few who worked to learn the names of his tools and tried her hardest to be helpful. They all knew how difficult it could be working with the Captain in his workshop. The space was sacred to him and at the tiniest infraction, he hurled people out. Most of the time he preferred to be alone...------------------Back in his workshop, Jam was soldering together the final pieces to the adaptor. Kid barreled in, a giant platter of meat, potatoes, and steamed cabbage in one hand and drinks in his other. "Snagged some more food. How long till we can power this shit?""We should be done in about an hour. After I finish these innards you can make a cover. Then I just need the holder to secure the crystal and we're in business," the woman informed him, head bent over the device and a soldering iron in her hands."So to make these things you need a supply of dead marines?" he asked fingering the bag of crystals she had on the workbench."Dead anything really. I just prefer marines," she quipped, pleased with her progress.Black lips twisted up into a disturbing smile. "You little psycho," the Captain chuckled.Jam giggled, overjoyed that her fellow inventor was accepting of her methods. "Well those brain-dead order takers should be good for something."She handed the device off to Kid, who began molding a steel frame over the innards with his power. In less than a minute the task was complete. Jam beamed at his innate talent. He's so damn useful. She handed him a crystal, eager to see what kind of structure he made to anchor it in place. A three prong setting with a circular base was soon added. It's perfect. He gets what to do without my constant input. Finally someone I can work with and he's practically housebroken.She reached over and grabbed at the cola he bought her, not even realizing he knew her drink of choice. Taking a nice sip she asked, "One crystal should power the basic operation of the ship for about two and half days. Here's eight of them; where do you want to keep them?"Kid held his hand out for the bag and put it in his pocket. "I'll hold onto to them. Probably teach Heat and Killer how to pop one in and give them one to hold for emergencies," he replied."Good thinking. I have a few more in reserve and a few to use for experiments.""I'll still power the engine with my devil fruit ability sometimes as its one way I push my limits," the man explained, cracking his neck. Fuck we've been bent over this shit for ages."When you do that, I'd like to watch and get a feel for how magnets can be used as an energy source," Jam said, spooning some steamed cabbage in her mouth. Magnets are infinitely powerful and the electromagnetic current they can produce is amazing. The Captain is basically a giant living magnet. Oh the destructive power at his disposable. The chaos I could create...Kid began digging into the plate with gusto, contemplating how detailed he should be in sharing how his power works. Devil fruits were personal and how they operated was essentially how he operated. Before he left home Killer had stolen a book on Devil Fruits and their history. He knew they reflected a person's inner most desires. Trust was a difficult thing for the large man and this was something highly personal.A knock startled him from his musings. The massacre soldier waltzed in, carrying in a plate of pasta with garlic bread and one with dessert. "Figured you forgot to get the Professor anything--- He almost dropped the food he was carrying, seeing them both eating off the same large plate. Kid never shared food. Ever."You ok Killah?" Kid said with a mouth full of meat."Ye—Yeah, I'm fine," the blonde man stuttered out. "What are you guys working on?" he asked, setting down the plates, awkwardly.The Captain quirked an eyebrow in confusion. "I told you in the kitchen. We're almost done with the power adaptor for those crystals. I'm just really fucking hungry. What you being weird for?" Why is he gawking at me? Is there food on my face? he thought hurriedly wiping at his mouth.Jam was busy snacking on the newly brought garlic bread. It's so good and fluffy. Skillet is the best. She looked up, studying the masked man, noticing how hard he was staring at the platter the captain brought in moments earlier. Shrugging, the small woman speared a piece of grilled meat onto her fork, wondering what was wrong. Killer's so odd sometimes..."I'm not being weird," the man denied, glad his mask kept them from seeing his mouth fall open.Kid snorted and got back to the matter at hand. Killer sat down at the table and watched the two finish the device, each working in tandem with one another and managing to munch away at the mountain of food with ease. They constantly reached over one another in between bites, with the redheads' tall form enveloping the smaller woman. Kid's eating a lot more but that little witch has a healthy appetite. How does he not notice he's sharing? They're practically on top of one another too. The idiot is completely focused on building...this is priceless. He struggled to hold in his laughter.Forty minutes later, the two shared a large grin, pushing their stools away and dashing out the door. Making their way to the engine room, Kid welded the component to the mainframe and pulled a crystal from the little bag. Inserting in into the adaptor, the engine gave a lurch and whirled into compliance. No more wasted Beli on fuel and I only power it when I feel the need. Heh.Killer followed behind watching the scene. Kid used to be more carefree with his happiness when building. As a child he would beam with joy when showing off his latest invention. But he quickly notices when someone is bored or unable to follow along, promptly clamming up and toning down his excitement. It's nice to see him in such a content mood.----------------------Later that evening, Killer strode up to the Captains' quarters and knocked. He decided to wait till after dinner to spring unfortunate news on his best friend. He's more rational on a full stomach.It almost felt wrong to spoil his friend's good mood but if he didn't deliver the blow someone else would. And Killer could almost guarantee Kid would take it even worse coming from anyone else. "So you had fun today?" he teased.The pale man turned to face his first mate, an annoyed sneer forming on his face. "Don't make it sound lame like that. I'm not some brat on a playdate.""Of course not Kid," said Killer cheekily, stressing the other's name, earning himself a frown in response.The taller of the two crossed his arms across his chest, pouting as his irritation flared up. "We won't run outta power now, ya fuck head. All the hot water we want. Hell I'm thinking of adding a large meat freezer."Killer froze, his electric blue eyes twinkling in bliss. Catching himself before he gave away how happy that idea made him, he replied, "That would be very beneficial for the crew."The brute snorted, "You want to do cartwheels you dildo. You're almost bouncing on your heels asshole. I know how long you've wanted a large meat freezer. Fuck I'm just as excited."The two men stared each other down for a minute, before the older, more mature one, sighed. "Kid you were happy all day. No yelling, no breaking shit, just you and the Professor working all cozy like."Red painted nails dug into open palms, their owner snarling out, "Just what are you implying?""..." Killer silently judged his best friend. Really you're going to make me explain it like you don't know what point I'm getting at."SHUT-UP!!!! She knew what the tools to hand me. She helped construct shit. Jam even knew how to hold a flashlight properly," he shouted, stomping his foot in exasperation and throwing himself into his desk chair."And you weren't just happy she let you practically rub up on her, looming over her all day? I saw how close you got into her space," Killer retorted.The leader blushed but defended himself, "Had to in order to work on the adaptor. It's easier to lean over her and do my part and then let her do her thing.""Does the Professor know who much you liked hanging off of her? A mad scientist is not the type of woman you try and fuck Kid. She's dangerous," the blonde warned seriously."You know I don't like to screw around with my subordinates; it makes shit messy. So no I don't want to fuck her," the redhead sneered, glowering at his companion. I learned my lesson the first time. "It's an unwilling attraction then?" the blonde said calmly, poking at the already irate man.Kid threw his hands up into the air. "Piss off! I didn't know how badly I'd enjoy having someone competent to work with till I did!" Huffing and flushing red, the man continued, "She understands the words coming out of my mouth even though I'm bad with explanations. She gets what I'm going for and fills in the blanks. She familiar with all the different electrical components of even complex machinery and her tiny hands are perfect at assembly. You see should see how fast she can put something together. She doesn't bitch and moan at long it takes to finish a project like the rest of you guys. We sat there from after breakfast till damn near dinner time working on the engine and then coming up with future ideas for the Punk afterwards!" the pale man shouted, red in the face.Killer sighed heavily. I knew she was going to be trouble. He was way too excited at the thought of her joining and look where we're at now. It's good she's oblivious to this shit. "I get it. She's strong. She's bold. She understands your passion for building. I can defiantly see the appeal. But if you want to keep her as a scientist you need to keep it in your pants," the massacre soldier reprimanded his friend.The other man huffed in annoyance, pointing his finger at his partner. "This is all your fault for telling me not to stick my dick in crazy! You know how I am with orders!""Kid you're being irrational," said the murder machine, exasperated but hopeful he could help settle down his irate leader.Not giving a damn about rationality or anything, the ruffian continued his rant. "She's taunting me I swear. With those little smiles, those constant giggles, the damn compliments...It makes me want to punch her," he said, slamming his fist into his metal palm. She doesn't know when to shut the fuck up! It took every ounce of willpower I have to ignore it and finish working. I don't need Killer on my case now!"It's called cute aggression. You find something cute and it pisses you off so you want to do something mean in retaliation," the blonde explained."I DO NOT FIND HER CUTE!" the buff man bellowed."Yell any louder and the whole crew will hear you."Kid slammed his mouth shut, seething with rage. "Killa, you're getting on my last nerve." The two went silent after that, the masked man realizing his friend needed a minute to compose himself. You've been working on your anger. I'm proud of you.Kid took several calming breathes before speaking again. "She hugs. When she's happy, she practically jumps you. It's terrible. Her tits pressed up against me and she has this carefree smile... it's the most frustrating thing ever. I hate it." Those hugs were wonderful but the fuck if he would acknowledge that fact. He would never admit it, not even under torture, but Killer said the term was touch starved. He despised that description and its accuracy. A stupid ass hug shouldn't do crap to me.Gods this is worse than I thought. And that gremlin has no clue. "Kid you ok?" his partner asked genuinely concerned.The muscular man put his head between his hands, groaning. "I banged this sweet piece of ass back on the last island. Woman was begging and screaming for my dick. I was well taken care of by that whore so that shrimp shouldn't even be a thought in my head. Jam's literally covered up as much as possible which should keep her off my radar. But fuck she's like a present I'm not allowed to open, and now it's the only thing I focus on," he ruefully admitted.Killer felt like giant weight was just thrown on him. There was no one at fault. Jam was only being friendly so he couldn't blame her and Kid was a product of a rough upbringing; he had trouble with feelings. He could handle the crew's kindness and admiration—it was familiar. But it took time to get him there. The professor's tough and sadistic, but only to enemies. Otherwise she's affectionate. I've seen how she giggles and plays around with Dive. Killer felt like an asshole and reasoned he should cut his best friend some slack before he blew a gasket. "Some of the guys are having a drinking contest in the crow's nest. Come on, we'll have music going and everything," he said, rubbing the redhead's back in a soothing manner.The crimson haired man nodded, following Killer, hoping his mates would be a distraction from his turbulent thoughts. Heat, Wire, Mosh, Moai, Papas, Snare, and UK were setting up a table with shot glasses while Disk J and Boogie handled the tunes. Alt and Jaguar came with bottles of liquor, carefully setting up the bar. The Captain grinned, his mood instantly improving.----------Giving Kid liquid courage had been a bad idea in hindsight. The brash man was never one for losing and so he drank himself silly. One second he was right next to them laughing it up and the next he was gone. Dammit Kid! How does a hulking man just disappear?!The leader of the Kid Pirates had slinked down to the lab intent on pestering his newest addition. He was getting that ugly ass lab coat off her. Period. He even had a harebrained, liquor induced plan that was foolproof. Not even having the courtesy to knock, the brute slammed the door open and confidently stepped inside. "Hey gremlin witch---"And was met with curious stares from Dive and House. What is this? The evil short shit convention? "What are you two doing here?" he asked with narrowed amber eyes. The three of them together feels ominous."Having a ladies night with Jam. We're giving each other mani-pedis," House replied, gesturing to the scientist who was currently painting her new friend's toes a lovely shade of light blue.Kid glanced around the lab seeing nail polish bottles, a plate of snacks, and margaritas. He noticed they were off to the side of lab, out of the way of the camera. If he remembered correctly they along with Bubblegum had spy duty tonight. I'd bet Beli Dive planned this. She's always finding ways out of work."Yeah we got Bubblegum to bring us some snacks and we've just been having a blast," Dive added cheerily. She grabbed Jam's right foot and waved it in his face. "See pretty isn't it?" she said in her fake innocent voice, knowing exactly what she was doing. Hehehe.Dive was like a younger sister to Kid. He knew he let her get away murder but he just couldn't help it. This damn bubble headed cunt knows I like nice feet.The professor had unbuttoned the last three buttons on her lab coat and ditched those hideous rubber green boots revealing a set of nice tanned and toned legs. He could see up a few inches past her knee, the edge of a purple skirt or maybe a dress peaking out. Her toes were painted black with red tips, making him gulp. Jam sighed at the blonde woman and put her foot back down, figuring Dive was just proud of how lovely a job she did painting her toes. They are nice. Dive's really good at this.Subconsciously he licked his lips, "...yeah real pretty," he stuttered out, making Dive grin mischievously. Even House, kind motherly House, had a sly smile. His instincts always served him well and they were screaming at him to run. Fuck that! It was his ship. He could go anywhere he wanted but he had the distinct feeling that he did not belong here. "Oh well carry on," he managed to reply, using his captain's voice to feel like he was in control. But of course that notion had to be slapped away."Why did you come down here then?" the Professor finally spoke up, now finished with House's nails. He's being weird again. Why does he look nervous? What is he afraid Dive will paint his nails pink or something?With her gaze focused on him, he found himself losing confidence. What was his great plan again? Tell her that if she wanted to be trusted with the private knowledge of how his power worked it was essential for her to reciprocate that trust in the form of him seeing her sans coat. He couldn't ask for that in front of these two; they'd see right through him. "I was going to talk about um, the meat freezer. Had an idea but...we will discuss this tomorrow," he lied, making Jam raise her eyebrows at his odd behavior while her companions giggled silently.The tall man promptly retreated to the safety of his quarters, feeling completely out of his element. And if he maybe had dreams about sucking on red tipped toes, that was his business and shut-up before he kills you.------------The Sunny Go is 183 feet tall and 127 feet long per the wiki and the Victoria Punk looks twice as large. So there is plenty of room for expansion as Kid sees fit. The ships only look small because Oda is bad at scaling. So are the animators.All those motherfuckers are vain as hell. Studied Oda's sketches: That's not wake up and roll out bed hair. That's carefully styled hair. Coupled with the makeup yeah vain. Probably have favorite beauty brands and everything. <Giggles>We have a doodle of young child Victoria and she has short hair. The sketch of Hip looks eerily similar.Oda draws a lot of feet. Man's clearly got a thing for them. Apparently it's the fourth most common kink in the world. Dirty fun facts...lol. Kid himself likes make-up and nail polish so the fuck if he wouldn't like it on a romantic interest.A friend of sorts doesn't believe Kid would open up to Killer so easily but if they've known each other since childhood and are willing to die for one another, I believe they keep no secrets. It's pointless---they can read each other like a book. The stories where the two of them fight about (or fight over) a new namaka and their effect on the crew----no these two don't fight and there's no way a new person would come between their bond.
SPOILERS AND RANT:
00000000000000000000000000001085 came out and now the shitheads are calling Sabo a fraud. The guys don't like anyone. Who the fuck would try and fight Imu and the five elders on their own? Of course he ran. I hoping the storyline surrounding Imu and the Void century come up soon.Discovering all important people have this Will of D just doesn't cut it for me. It boring and feels like nepotism. Only these people born into greatness will be important----it's the kind of justification kings use to control people. My family is special and therefore so am I.When Naruto came out I loved how he was from humble beginnings. Then we find out his dad was the fourth Hokage and his mom and her family served as the vessel for the nine tails...he was always special. It makes it harder to like the protagonist at that point. Can't even begin to go into all the manga's I grew to dislike for that bullshit. Every time we get an orphan we find out later (after I'm already invested in the story) that their immediate family was someone amazing and ridiculously powerful. It's so overdone....1086 is coming out soon but then there's a month long break so Oda can have an eye procedure done. Look I rather he take care of himself. People are cruel to creators when they don't churn out work quickly enough. Even fanfiction authors get flack, but the shit a goat like Oda gets is ridiculous. People need to chill.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Dive had been a very busy bee. The next day after breakfast she couldn't wait to gossip with House, Emma, Whitney, and Clash. Quincy would pretend not to listen, gossip was immature rubbish to her, but they all knew she ate up the juicy details just like the rest of them. Uppity bitch...Hip, Hop, and Joplin would be present as well but they were firmly anti-Jam which bothered the blonde woman greatly. "But that's the thing. Jam doesn't do anything. It's all the Boss," the small woman clarified, determined to defend her friend."She's always putting that ginormous ass in his face," Joplin hissed, annoyed just thinking about their newest addition. I'm way cuter and I don't feel the need to show off like that.House shook her head. "No she's not. She's completely unaware she's being watched. Jam only dances like that when she's alone in her lab. She did a small bit when she blew up that base, but the movements she made then were tame. I don't think she'd do all that gyrating if he were present." That would take courage. I'd be too shy.Brushing her long hair, Dive rolled her eyes. Gods they are so jealous of the jelly monster. "Last night he barged in her lab, didn't even bother to knock," she scoffed."He's the Captain he doesn't have to," Hop was quick to justify."He'd knock before opening the door to the woman's quarters. Everyone deserves that level of courtesy," Whitney replied, a bit put off by her boss's behavior."Yeah and the weird greedy look on his face was telling. He was up to something. But we spoiled it," sang Dive, swinging her legs from her perch on her dresser. I need some new ribbons..."He did seem alarmed we were present in the lab," House muttered, styling her hair into her trademark horns. Looked like he got caught with his hand in the cookie jar."I got him good though. Put Jam's freshly painted toes in his face," the bubbly woman giggled, picturing the Captain's embarrassed face."Why would you do that? You know how he is about feet," Hop whispered in disbelief. This stupid bitch right here.Gleefully Dive began swinging her legs faster, unable to contain her excitement at this tidbit of juicy info. "I wanted to confirm my suspicions. Got him to admit he found her toes pretty.""I may have been spying at his door last night. Caught a few snippets. Killer thinks he finds her cute," Emma added on, sticking her tongue out as she penciled in her eyebrows."How is she unaware of his attention then? Is she stupid or something?" Clash asked, seriously stumped, polishing her Claymore."No, it's just she doesn't know how the boss is. She thinks he's just being normal while we know he's being nice by his standards," House explained, having gotten to understand a little of how the Professor behaved."But how the hell did she attract him?" Hop asked, wondering what such an unfashionable woman did to catch the Boss's eye.Emma snorted, wondering when did everyone get so damn stupid. "Everything about her screams chaos and Kid thrives in bedlam. It's not hard to understand," she mocked."I think her danger level and strength drew him in but what got him all focused on her is Killer. You know they're kind of a packaged deal," said Quincy, before her eyes widened at the implications. Blushing she stuttered out, "Not like that you perverts! Just if someone were to date one of them, the other would be included heavily in their life. Helping Killer gather information and giving him that machine did a lot in way of earning the Boss's favor. Plus the power crystals help us all.""She's also working on building a meat freezer for us. But it's really Killer's freezer. Several people cook but the kitchen is Killer's domain," said Dive, happily thinking of all the great food they could store soon."That's it? She's nice to Killer!" Hip screeched, ready to boil over. I'm nice to Killer! I'm nice to everyone!A loud sigh left the kind, usually patient woman. "Nice without an ulterior motive. She doesn't know how close they are. She wasn't trying to get to Kid by going through his best friend. Jam thinks dehydrated food is a useful thing to keep around for an emergency food stash. The idea of a giant freezer to enable us to keep fresh food at our disposable is imperative. She said she's landed on islands that had very little in the way of sustenance. Her actions are practical in her eyes. I know some of you don't believe in Astrology but the Captain is a Capricorn, he bleeds practicality," House reminded everyone, a few occupants groaning at her. Plus he loves to eat.Turning on her flat iron, Whitney hummed. "She's useful as hell too. Unlimited power for all of our shit at the expense of the marines. I mean what more could a pirate ask for?"Quincy piped up once more. "The professor's shared several of her pharmaceuticals with Pomp and I. She's in the process of teaching us how to make some of them. Jam even agreed to let up use her dehydrator for our herbs and plants when necessary. We all know Killer won't share the kitchen one for shit." That dickhead saying he doesn't want us to mess it up."Same when I asked. I'll be able to make more face cream and moisturizers when we land. Hopefully this next island isn't a winter one. She's not bad. A bit barmy yeah, but reasonable. Just don't touch anything without permission. Isn't that right Dive?" House asked with narrow eyes, remembering last night's fiasco with the blonde woman nosing about in the lab, opening every drawer she could.The smaller woman looked on sheepishly. "That was an accident," she pouted. At least Jam didn't get too mad at me.Hip and Joplin looked on sadly digesting this new information while Hop made a grimace."Oh don't be so whiney. Kid may find some beauty on the next island and forget all about the Professor. His moods are fickle as fuck. I think his libido spiked after he fooled around at that brothel. I for one am glad he got over himself and was acting normal. The horny bastard may just need to satisfy himself and Jam's new. Sometimes I think you guys read too much into every little thing," Clash huffed, irritated with the conversation. I swear they're all so damn sensitive."A good looking woman can catch his eye and satisfy him for a second but it's all just sex. The Professor managed to attract him and it looks like its driving him batty," Dive giggled, finishing her hair."I find it kinda funny. Like poetic justice. How many women have thrown themselves at the Captain only to be used as a quick lay? And now he wants someone who has no clue he's interested like that. Face it Kid relies on his muscles and roughish looks to get attention. Girls melt at his feet, it's not like he tries hard. I think he needs to feel the particular sting of rejection. Might do him some good," Whitney said wisely, finishing applying her eye makeup while she waited for her flat iron to warm up.Hop frowned, reaching for a red sash to add to her attire. "He has. Victoria got mad at him and Killer and never spoke a word to them after some argument about curry udon. Then she died before anything happened between them."The tall black woman rolled her eyes. "That was a first love. Was it meaningful yes, it literally inspired him to take to the seas. But that wasn't serious and it probably wouldn't have lasted. Kid was way too young for that. From what I've gathered he admired her strength and take no shit attitude," replied Whitney."We're both tough as nails," Joplin protested, hands on her hips."The two of you can't even tell him no. He could walk all over you and it be 'yes boss.' Jam's crazy; if he tried that shit with her, I'd bet my stash she'd go for the jugular," said Clash, holding her sword up to the light to see if she missed any spots."Ladies if boss hasn't looked your way by now, it's a pipe dream. We've all had a bit of a crush on him at one point or another, but the man isn't exactly the romantic type. He's all goals and fighting. And honestly looking back, I was confusing his kindness for something more. I know he's saved us but he's the same with the guys. He's a wonderful captain, and he cares about us greatly, just not in that manner," Emma said, hoping to end the discussion.----------------------------------------It had been a week on ship as the Professor slowly got used to being part of a group. These guys are incredibly close to one another. So many big personalities. Dive was her favorite, always going the extra mile to make her feel included. The small bubbly woman often barged into her lab and watched her work, filling her in on the going-ons in the crew. Sometimes she brought along House, who always came prepared with snacks.Dive was sitting on top of her main preparation table, crunching on some veggie sticks. "A pasta maker. They won't ask for it, but I know they'd go crazy for it," she sang out, talking while eating. And it would piss off those guys even more.House sucked in a breath. She herself loved Killer's pasta dishes. Those fresh herbs he's been drying have been lovely. But freshly made pasta would be absolute heaven. Every since their ladies night, House had warmed considerably to the Professor. She's way less scary when she's not trying to murder you. Ooh Dive it's a great idea. But evil too.Jam quirked an eyebrow at the younger woman's request. "I suppose it wouldn't be too hard. I'll put it under my drafts," she said reaching for a cherry tomato from their veggie and fruit tray. House had brought it along with a cheese, meat, and cracker board. Popping a grape in her mouth she continued, "It's how I work. I order projects by importance and then by my ability to currently advance them. Sometimes I run out of materials or don't have enough test subjects, it all depends.""So can you make anything?" House wondered, grabbing a cheese stick."I've yet to come across something I couldn't pull off if I really wanted to. But I do turn down certain experiments," the scientist answered."What kind of things do you refuse?" Dive asked, curious if it was a morality issue or something else."I rate each experiment from a case by case basis. You gotta tell me exactly what it is and then we can sort out the details," Jam explained, grabbing her notebook and adding pasta maker to the list. I bet I can extort all the mac and cheese I want out of that furball in exchange."That's cool. So could you make me glue that's safe for skin and has a remover when I need it?" the bubble-headed woman inquired with a nasty smile."I could. What's it for?" the older woman said, questioning the blonde's motivations. Always up to something aren't you? I guess that's why we get along.Blue eyes lit up with impish glee "Pranking," she giggled, thinking of all the naughty things she could get up to. That rude bastard is going to pay.The Professor narrowed her eyes at her new friend, knowing the type of mischief the bubbly blonde got up to. "The Captain's not going to be mad at me for assisting you?"No he'll find it funny so long as I don't use it on him," she pledged, crossing her heart.Jam snickered, That big hypocritical baby. "Alright, give me a few days."Black lips fell open in shock. "Really?!"The professor shrugged and smiled. "Yeah. You may want it for a gag, but it could have several other uses. And I'm bored anyway," she said with a pout."But aren't you busy helping boss?" cautioned House, not wanting Dive's childishness getting the Professor in trouble."Except for the power adaptor for the engine, he hasn't really approached me yet. He left a note with a basic blueprint for that freezer and just disappeared. Every time I try and find him, he vanishes. I've even left him notes on my projects and haven't gotten a response. So I've been occupied showing Quincy and Pomp all the pharmaceuticals I make, focusing on concocting a supply for the infirmary. But I am almost out of materials. When we dock, I'll be real busy gathering and stealing supplies. Hopefully there's something cool to investigate. The island we met on was a bust," she sulked."We could help," the horned woman offered, making Jam stare at her in surprise.Dive placed her hands on her hips and loudly proclaimed, "That's how the Kid Pirates work. No one goes off on their own very often. We splinter off into groups. Shitty tasks go much faster with help.""Ok then, cool." I've never had aid, only competition.The slightly taller woman nodded. "Jaguar has a nose like a bloodhound. You could tell him what you want if there's like a forest of jungle and he'd find it. Pomp does most of the forging for him and Quincy. I'm sure he'd help. Bubblegum is good at haggling with the vendors and spotting quality items. Men are always super nice to Hip, Quincy, and Whitney offering them ridiculous discounts. I'm good at finding fresh herbs in the marketplace," House answered."Good to know. And you?" Jam asked turning to Dive."I'm stealthy as fuck and have the stickiest fingers!""Really?" Jam asked, letting her left hand bubble into a jellied appendage, waving it in her friends face.Dive snorted out choking laughter. "You're crazy."--------------The Professor found Quincy to be a contradiction. She loved to act poised and proper, but was immature at heart. Her medical knowledge was astounding and while she was eager to learn, the tall beauty often put her foot in her mouth with a desire to puff herself up. The curly haired woman liked to act like she already knew the things Jam was showing her, much to the smaller woman's annoyance."Yes that's such a simple formula. I could have come up with it," Quincy said, looking over the Professors notes on basic pharmaceuticals. Jesus this stuff is so advanced. I don't want her to think I'm a dumbass...Pomp was easier to deal with but sometimes his flirty personality was a bit much. Jam knew he did it to be funny and wasn't serious, but it got irksome after awhile. Now when they were talking about bombs, he was super focused and very resourceful with his gunpowder concoctions. He loved making things go kaboom the same way the Professor did. Flashily. They were both looking forward to docking and testing out a new explosive.------------------It was four more days until they reached landfall. Reck was busy with his mapmaking. He always drew a rough sketch of an island on one side of his paper and on the back the relevant information from the island. Approximate land size, resources available, island name, if it was anyone's territory, those kinds of details.Sometimes Wire joined him and added illustrations of cool things they encountered. Yuki no Namida was boring and he had just finished with it, setting the map aside to let the ink dry properly.Sighing to himself, he poured a nice big glass of wine. Everything was going well, too well in his opinion. It feels like a calm before the storm type of situation. Best to enjoy this fine Merlot and hope for the best.-----------------------------Kid grunted, darting to his workshop like a criminal. Years of living on the streets taught him how to sneak and slink in the shadows without ever attracting attention. Fucking evil midget...He knew he was the one being crazy. Somehow between him and a fucking mad scientist, he was the crazy one. This is screwed up. Wack-ass no good woman.The morning after Dive's shitty ladies night he had drawn up a rough sketch of the freezer he wanted with dimensions and a couple of important details. He had Killer hand it off to Jam, saying he was busy and not to be disturbed.Pondering to himself, while tinkering in his workshop, he finally figured out why she got to him. She was nice. Nice nice unless you pissed her off. A fucking hugger of all things. People were not nice to Eustass Kid. Not even when he was a cute little runt was anyone kind to him. Killer and him bonded over their shared hardships. Their relationship was a give and take until they formed a bond of trust. It took time for him to open up to his crew. And no one just invaded his personal space on the regular like it was no big deal.She wasn't afraid of him, not even the tiniest bit. Part of that conclusion pissed him off; he was a powerful, fear-inspiring, beast of a man. But a small sliver of his gruff persona knew he enjoyed how comfortable she was with him. People were always quick to judge and assume the worse of him. He grew big early on in life. Fuck it was part of the reason Killer approached him in the first place; the blonde assumed he was the same age because of how tall he was. Being as physically imposing as he was, people were afraid to even get near him. This runt expressed not a drop of apprehension in his presence.His Observation Haki let him know she had no ulterior motives. She wasn't being flirty or trying to get something outta him; she hugged when she was happy. Simple as that. Poor Heat had gotten one yesterday when he shared his homemade hot sauce with her. The blue man had turned puce, stammering out a "Your welcome," before practically fleeing.Glad I'm not the only one. Vaguely he thought of how Killer might react to an impromptu hug. That bastard would stutter worse than Heat. You could probably see his blush though his damn helmet!-------------Jam meanwhile was none the wiser to all this gossip over her presence. But she was concerned with the way her captain was seemingly hiding from her. Ever since that day in the engine room he's been M.I.A. Wonder what's crawled up his ass?An alarm startled her from her musings. The loud siren was blaring. Her lab door was ripped open and the object of her contemplation rushed in, "That's the signal for an enemy combatant. To the deck!"Running behind the red haired captain to surface of the ship, the two were greeted by cannon fire and pandemonium. A navy vessel was fast approaching, "Che, those fucking morons. You know who I am! Why the hell would you send METAL cannonballs at me?!" Quickly the cannonballs froze midair redirecting the trajectory back their assailants.Killer, Wire, Boogie, and Hop all jumped over, bringing the fight to their enemies. The group quickly disposed of several marines, their blades slicing through such weak opponents. Pomp, UK, Dive, Joplin, and Bubblegum crossed the metal gangplank their boss had assembled, dashing forward and making quick work of the small fries on the deck.Looking around, Jam realized that the crew didn't really need her. This ship was a regular patrol ship, nothing fancy so its combatants were being ripped apart by the seasoned pirates. Sighing she piled up the bodies and began to melt them down for bio-fuel. Pulling out a blue vial she lobbed it over. Thankfully I made these morons immune to the liquefaction serum all because Dive couldn't keep her grubby hands out of my things.It was easy to forget how dangerous Professor Inator really was. He saw a few of his people get covered in that awful blue shit the witch used to melt people down. And this was it. Her betrayal. He'd murder the little bitch for this. Without a conscious thought, a metal arm assembled and barreled down, slamming the scientist down onto the enemy's deck, cracking the wooden floor. He didn't pull his punch, hitting her with the full force of his monstrous strength. His arm rose, ready to pummel her to death.Green eyes widened in shock, as a small body dashed to her captain. "No boss! They're fine!" House shouted pulling at his arm, trying to prevent him from attacking her friend once more.Out of the dark blue mire emerged his subordinates, sticky but no worse for wear. "Why didn't that affect us?" Compo, Boogie, and Joplin walked away from the muck, the blue sludge sliding off them and onto the floor.Kid's amber eyes widened in surprise and he swore under his breath, "Fuck."Jam groaned from her position on the floor, the back of her skull screaming in pain. What in the fuck? Who the hell hit me? Her mind was spinning as she barely noticed Dive in her face, trying to get her to focus.The small woman was pushed aside by Pomp, who pulled Jam's face towards him to check for a concussion. He removed her goggles gently and stared into her eyes. "Ah pretty lady, don't be shy. Can you follow my finger?" the small man asked, carefully studying her eyes. Fuck it all Boss. She wouldn't waste her time making us cool stuff just to screw us over. Think sir think. He sighed, knowing the large man was probably yearning for a rematch and that the sexual tension he picked up on was making his captain crazy.Kid felt stupid. Why would she wait all this time just to surprise him with a betrayal? She wasn't some ridiculous over the top comic book villain making everything theatrical...Shit.Unsteady feet rose up, pushing her namaka away. She was huffing loudly and cradling her head. Facing her Captain, she hissed, "You actually doubt me. Screw you!" The mad scientist swayed but stomped away, angry and hurt at how he viewed her. I told him how I felt about traitors and this is how he treats me!"And where do you think you're going?" he said, jumping in front of her path."Leaving! You attacked me, thinking I was killing them! You don't trust me for shit! Go to hell you ugly bastard!" she shouted, glaring up at him."Quit being so fucking emotional! What was I supposed to think when you threw that crap at them?!""Are you really saying that shit to me you hypocritical asswipe? You the chicken shit whose been hiding from me for days?"A vein pooped out the man's forehead, throbbing with murderous intent. "You will respect me—""Fuck your respect; you were itching to strike me. The hell with this crap!" Quick as a flash she was gone, descending into the bowels of her lab, stuffing her most precious belongings into a bag. I'm stupid for ever thinking I had gotten lucky enough to find a spot to stay. I should know better by now.Little footsteps halted her progress. "Jam, you're not actually serious are you?" a soft voice asked, sadly. No, we were having so much fun together."Very," the woman hissed, grabbing some pills and swallowing them quickly. That should prevent the concussion and give me the strength to either fight or leave.Dive's voice warbled and cracked, "But he didn't know. He thought you had melted the guys!""I've been with you guys for almost two weeks. Not a long time no, but plenty of time to do whatever the hell I pleased. What kind of half cocked moron would think I'd wait that long to double-cross someone and what do I even gain? Not a damn thing! Your captain is a lunatic.""The Boss isn't good at trusting people. He's been stabbed too many times to count," the blonde defended."Not my problem. But since I like you and a few others, I'll be nice and just leave. Usually I'd sink the ship and damn the crew to a watery grave but I won't punish all you for the assclowns's bad decisions. Now move!" the woman growled.Still angry she turned around and vented some more. "And why wasn't he reading the research notes I gave him? What's the point of a scientist then?" Dive had no response.------------------Up on deck, the crew looked on nervously. In an endeavor to establish order, the red-haired captain began giving out orders. "Go loot that marine ship.""Kid..." Killer began. I know what it looked like; I was about to slice her up myself. You need to apologize though.Reading between the lines, the younger man huffed. "I've got this. It was a little mistake; she'll get over it. Besides the mouthy cunt got right up. Jam's fine, just dramatic," he said, crossing his arms and hoping he was right.The small woman marched up the stairs, Dive at her heels. The muscular man glanced at her bags and snorted. "And where do you think you're going woman? You can't just up and leave. Where will you go? We're in the middle of the god-damn ocean!" he shouted, glaring at his subordinate."And you may have a concussion!" Pomp, yelled, worried about the Professor's safety.She ignored them both, stalking over to the railings and preparing to jump. I've swam further but this is going to suck.Amber eyes widened in stupefaction. This crazy shrimp is going to swim for it! Swim out here in the New World! "I forbid you."Not even bothering to turn around, she gleefully uttered out, "Try," with a mocking tone and swing of her hips. This bull-headed bastard is something else. How dare he order me about!Kid saw red. Now the ship wasn't that damn island. Here he had access to metal and plenty of it. Focusing his powers he pulled out the stash he kept, various sheets of metal and weapons coming out of every nook and cranny. A large metal tornado formed, encircling the two. Those marines had been nothing but fodder, but the gremlin would be a proper fight. His tongue darted out, licking his lips in voracious hunger. "You sure, because this time you won't be so lucky," he growled.Professor Jam Inator laughed loudly, pulling her knucklers on and getting into a battle pose, glad he took the bait. I am going to punch that imbecile in his revolting mug till he chokes on his own blood!There was something so aggravating about such a feminine laugh. It pissed him off to no end. How dare she laugh at me! Who the fuck does she think she is?! He formed his customary gigantic metal arms and threw a punch.She probably has a concussion Master Kid. Is this even a fair fight? Heat wondered, uncomfortable with the situation. The rest of the crew looked on in dismay. It was a routine marine battle, how had it gotten out of hand so quickly?Jam dodged, her small size allowing her to evade the swing. It also helped that Kid was somewhat restricted least he damage the Punk. Slipping in between his elongated metal limbs she threw the entirety of her weight behind a punch that encapsulated all her anger at this situation. He doesn't have faith in me. I was never one of them...The blue Seastone knuckles hit their mark, his left stub now dislocated at the shoulder. She aimed for an old wound, the pain surging throughout his body. The redhead groaned, biting down hard to keep from screaming out. He wouldn't give her the satisfaction. Never! He used his good arm to pop it back in to place, hissing as he did so.Wasting no time, she jumped away and out of his immediate range, bouncing on her feet as a boxer would. This fight would be nothing if I hadn't made everyone on board immune to my most common toxins. That's what I get for being nice.And soon it was a flurry of attacks, metal coming at the small woman from all directions. Having little choice, her body bubbled, the amorphous blob form making an appearance once more.Kid's eyes shone with anticipation, his manic grin overtaking his features, making him look crazed. The blob stretched an arm out, easily weaving through the metal tornado of sharp projectiles and wrapping a tendril around the man's ankle and yanking him downward. He slipped forward but caught himself just in time to avoid a strike by her Seastone knuckles. Sneaky bitch. And then a heinous thought entered his mind, making him chuckle darkly. Above the fight, metal melded together, forming a reinforced metal container. He'd put the Jam in a jar!Kid used some of the metal to attack and distract her, slamming her against the deck with his fist, watching her ooze right back up and send a jellied appendage at his abdomen, slicing though his flesh. She can cut me in that form. Holy shit! This evil cunt can harden herself. Armament Haki! I need to end this quickly as neither crushing nor slashing attacks seem to do any damage. Focusing his power, he began slowly covering the floor in a thin metal layer. He would have to be fast or she'd escape.As soon as Jam righted herself for another attack, he lifted the metal coated floor up a foot off the ground and put the box over it, capturing the short woman, as one would catch a bug. Calling on his power he magnetized the lid close and began condensing the metal, making it thicker and harder to escape from. You're not going anywhere.Jam was in shock. Did he just trap me in a big metal box? This chicken fried fuck is too afraid to fight me properly! She slammed up against the walls, trying to free herself, hating the feeling of being caged.The box got smaller and smaller until the limited room was crushing her. Even a diamond can crack another diamond and that's exactly what was happening; her body was pressing up against itself causing the woman pain. Fuck, I still need air and he's squishing me! God-dammit! –was Jam's last thought before she lost consciousness.------------According to an SBS comics are a thing in One Piece---Law reads the ones on stealth Black. Lol what a nerd. So Kid can compare Jam to a comic book villain. Kid's been wanting a rematch; he has to be the strongest member on his ship. Egotistical asshat. The metal box he makes in Wano to trap Big Mom's homies? Yeah he's used a containment box before. Poor Professor Inator---a box is so simple she didn't even think of it.
Spoilers:
000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001086 was more mysteries than answers. I am glad we got the names of the five elders though. I wonder how exactly Shanks is related to Garland? They say Oda is doing well after his eye surgery. I hope 1087 focuses on the Strawhats or on what happened to my two babies. I don't care how selfish that is. But I have proof Vegapunk is evil now. Poor Dragon can't believe the destructive power the scientist gave the World Government.Omg episode 1066! How can people not like him? My poor trash baby. No wonder he's so grouchy. I knew he was mistreated by that doodle Oda did of him as a brat ages ago. It looks like he's living in the scrap yard. And we got new pictures of some more crew members. I updated chapter 4 with the new information. I even put pictures on Wattpad and Ao3. And Law you troll! Those sarcastic smiles and that pout were to die for. They argue like brothers having a dick measuring contest. Giggles.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The banging on the container he made stopped abruptly and a small bit of blackish slime oozed out. Dive was screaming at him to stop. His blinked, his eyes not dilating anymore as he regained focus. Crap I made the box too small. Quickly he separated the metal, Jam's amorphous form dropping limply to the ground with a plop.The silence was deafening, no one moving for a moment.Killer shook his head, "I think she still needs air Kid. I can sense her life force; she's alive, just knocked out I guess. It's hard to tell." Shit, he lost it there for a second. Guess we haven't fought anyone worthwhile in quite sometime. He was over pumped for battle. This unhinged idiot.Pomp was already on the ground with Dive, looking over their fallen namaka. Her usually purplish body had several black splotches, most likely indicating bruising is Pomp's opinion. "Is she going to be ok?" Dive sniffled out. Poor Jam, she didn't do anything wrong.Gingerly, the small medic touched the black bruises, noting how they felt lumpy unlike the smoothness of the rest of Jam's body. "Well she has survived a long time on her own. I'd assume she's been in worse scrapes. But we need to get her to the infirmary and maybe apply some of that healing balm she gave us. Since she prepared the stuff, it would stand to reason it works on her. I really don't know how to treat injuries like these I'm afraid," Pomp confessed."By her Haki signature I can tell you Jam's pissed but otherwise fine. Probably be out for a day or two," their captain muttered, sighing moodily. Kid decided to keep her sadness to himself. She's upset I didn't trust her. She looked close to tears when she bolted to her lab. Fucking dammit, this overly emotional woman, he complained, groaning in pain. Kid dropped to his knees, the slash at his stomach deeper than he thought. She was seriously trying to fuck me up! That little bitch is absolutely psycho, he thought with a devilish grin, blood dripping from his gash."Captain!" several of his subordinates shouted with Quincy pulling ahead and quickly examining his wound. "It's a bit deep but concentrated in one area. She was aiming to cause maximum pain.""Evil midget was serious then," he scoffed, his enjoyment peaking. And I won.Quincy shook her head, "No she avoided all your major organs and could have easily targeted them. Jam probably wanted you to feel pain and make you unable to follow her." So she cares enough not to leave us captain-less. Thank Roger. She could have gone for his heart or lungs.With a bit of struggle, Kid stood and leaned on the tall woman who led him off to the infirmary.----------------Quincy laid her captain down on an examination table and began cleaning the wound and sealing it up. It would heal neatly, no trace of a scar as Jam had made a clean slash. Plus the medicines she made were highly effective if used in a timely manner. She then applied some ointment to ease the soreness associated with his dislocated arm. Woman's precise with her attacks. Jeeze the power it takes to hurt the Boss like this. Jam's something else.Kid glanced over, watching Pomp apply some medicine to Jam with Dive's help. Within a few minutes the worst of the bruising vanished, her normal purple hue returning. Dive was glaring at him from across the room, her big blue eyes narrowed in disappointment. Kid looked away, having the sense to look chastised.The tall woman finished up with him and sighed, "Captain, you need to rest for a bit." Please don't be an insufferable asshole; just be a good boss and stay in the bed.The brute grunted and moved over to where Jam was. "How is the runt?"Quincy sighed. I knew he wouldn't listen, she pouted.Pomp finished examining Jam, using his stethoscope to try and find any signs of life. "Well the balm I used got rid of those horrid splotches and if you listen closely you can hear a low hum. I think she's sleeping." The small medic looked up and frowned, "Captain, you went overboard. We know how strong you are, you didn't have to go so hard."Even Pomp sounds disappointed. Fuck tits, the large man scowled. "She was serious and I couldn't think of anything else to do. Crushing, slashing, and stabbing don't work on her. Trapping her seemed like the smart option," the bulky man defended, crossing his arms over his massive chest."You're a sore loser," Dive snorted, dismissing his reasoning. You just couldn't let her have that win, could you?Kid saw red for second, bristling at the tiny woman's accusation. "I am not! I wasn't going to let her up and abandon us! She had her bags packed and everything! Over one little punch to the head!""That little punch could have killed most of us," Quincy muttered. Abandon? Uh-oh. We all know how he gets with that topic. He goes feral. Maybe Jam will be reasonable and stay. Look at me, expecting reasonable behavior from a mad scientist!"She got up just fine. Was sassing me and everything," the tall man snapped. Fuck I was thickening the walls of her cage. I only miscalculated how small I made the interior. Get off my case and stop acting like I'm the bad guy! She was the one leaving!"No her backtalk was tame, unrefined even. She had a concussion boss," Pomp explained, rolling his eyes.Kid glowered, knowing his subordinates were right. Sighing he plopped down on the same bed as Jam, facing away from the prying and judging eyes of his crew. "Quincy said I need to rest. Beat it.""And what are you doing in Jam's bed?!" Dive shouted, blushing heavily. He is absolutely shameless."Making sure she doesn't run off. It's not like anyone else can stop her," he said, pleased with his scheme.The three looked at their leader in disbelief. He had it bad.House let herself in carrying the Professors lab coat and other items which she laid on a nearby table. She stuffed the gloves in her pocket though, knowing the other woman would hate to miss out on valuable bio-fuel crystals. Good thing she demonstrated how her gloves worked. Looking up, the sight she saw made her blush in indignation and second-hand embarrassment. Why is the Boss in the same recovery bed as Jam?! That dirty pig! I need to go get Killer after he finishes overseeing the looting and destruction of that marine ship. He'll put a stop to this.She motioned to her other crew members, silently asking what was going on.Dive muttered, "He said the 'A' word. I think he's afraid she'll run off if he leaves her alone."House sighed. This was going to get messy. I doubt the Professor will be happy about what he's doing. It looks like he's cuddling her. Summoning up her courage and putting on her best disappointed mom voice, the blue haired woman chided, "Boss, it's inappropriate for you to be in bed with an unconscious woman."The man scrunched up his face in annoyance. "Yeah because this blob of jelly is oh so sexy. I'm watching her. Now piss off," Kid groused, in no mood for a discussion. His subordinates sighed and left, knowing they'd have to get Killer to handle their leader.As soon as he heard the door click close, Captain Kid leaned over and lightly touched the surface of Jam's 'skin'. The jelly was incredibly smooth, satin like in texture. It was slightly warm and felt nice and calming to the beastly man. At least she's ok. The little shit-stain is tough as nails. But fuck what am I going to do when she regains consciousness? Plagued by his turbulent thoughts, the man kept caressing the knocked out scientist.What no one knew is that Jam was in a stasis mode. The greatest advantage of her gelatinous body was that it needed very little to function. Thus she healed at an accelerated rate as energy didn't need to be diverted to normal bodily functions. With the application of the professor's bruise balm, her body was already making great strides towards a recovery.Who the fuck is petting me?! was her first thought upon waking. She had no mouth nor heart, but she required the ability to see. Her 'eyes' weren't visible to anyone, otherwise they'd be targeted as a weak point, but she could see just fine. Glancing to the side she saw the oaf stroking her absentmindedly. She bristled in indignation, I am no pet! And why are we on the same bed?! Sighing heavily in her mind, the woman tried piecing together the chain of events that occurred after she lost. Last thing I remember was being caged in metal and passing out due to lack of oxygen. Dumbass kept constricting the cage till I got squished. Seeing as I feel fine, someone must of healed me, using the medicines I supplied. Huh, they don't want me dead. Does the captain wish to keep me aboard that badly? Eugh, make up your mind idiot! I should suffocate you!--------------Stroking Jam was oddly comforting, lulling Kid to sleep. He nodded off, unaware that Jam was indeed awake and just waiting to strike him down. But for now, he was lucky she was unable to move freely. Since no one is trying to kill me or restrain me, I should be smart about this and heal up as much as possible for round two.She stared up at the oaf, watching him snore softly. This brute is blocking me in. I can't even see past him. Great. Guess he stayed close to monitor when I get up. Fucking asshole. You'll pay for that sucker punch and for trapping me in a fucking box!She quietly stewed in silence, devising a plan of attack. He gets onto me for a hug and this hypocrite is spooning me! What is his deal?! We were just trying to eviscerate each other. Fuck and I thought I was off my rocker. At least he's quiet and warm. I think this is the first time I've ever seen him so peaceful. It's weird. The quiet part is nice. If only I could smack him across his stupid face! she grumbled.
I only planned to injure him in our battle and then leave. Just a little stabby-stabby to incapacitate him and cause maximum agony. Like he deserves for being an ass!
Sighing and willing herself to calm down, she continued her rant. He may be a doofus but the others would die without him. I shouldn't have been so kind. Now I'll have to step it up big time. Fuck I'm still immobile....guess sleep is the only option available.Fifty minutes went by until she heard a door knob turn and heavy boots coming ever closer. Groggily she grumbled to herself, angry at being woken up."Kid we have a situation. Come to the kitchen for a meeting. Pomp is going to stay and watch the Professor." Dammit you redheaded menace. You can't go nary a moment without doing something you shouldn't be doing. I doubt she'd let you anywhere near her after that fight.Kid grumbled but followed after his first-mate, sparing one last glance at his bed-mate. I'll just see what this is about and scarf down lunch before coming back. The little blob is comfy and I can't afford to leave her unattended. While angry about being woken up abruptly, Jam was ecstatic about the removal of her jailor. Ah freedom. It will be much easier to get away now. Just have to wait till Pomp is distracted. I've recovered almost enough to slip away, she giggled manically. ---------------The duo made their way to the kitchen, Kid sitting at his usual spot, Joplin and Hip rushing over to deliver lunch. Kid only stared ahead, focusing on Killer."House tell everyone what you told me," the massacre soldier directed.Nervously the small, slender woman began speaking. "Dive and I spend a lot of time with the professor. She tells us what she's working on and even taught the two of us how her gloves work. Here," she said, setting down six purple crystals she had gotten after using Jam's gloves to condense the liquefied marines.The crew was in astonishment. All it took was hanging about the little runt and she'd share all her scientific secrets? Even Kid was surprised."Dive was being a nosy brat and almost spilled a dangerous solution on herself, so the professor thought it be a good idea to make the crew immune to the chemicals she frequently uses. Um, when she couldn't get a hold of you Boss, she left detailed notes of her experiments posted to your workshop's door. Did you not read them Captain?" the blue-haired woman asked softly. Please don't blow a gasket.Kid was livid, clenching his hands by his sides to prevent himself from lashing out. He didn't need another subordinate in the med bay. Yeah he fucked up, but he was working on faulty information. Had he known what she had done, this scuffle wouldn't have happened. "I'm gonna sit here and eat. By the time I'm done those reports better have magically appeared. Understand?" he growled out, his deep baritone barely a low hiss on uncontrolled rage. I can't believe this shit! A mutiny was committed against me! Those reports were meant for my eyes. What dead idiot touched them?!Nervous glances where thrown around the room, everyone wondering who could be so colossally stupid as to steal anything meant for their captain.Killer braced himself, mentally preparing himself for the onslaught of profanities and the tantrum that was sure to come. When all he saw was Kid aggressively stuffing his face, he paused in bewilderment. He's been much calmer lately. My little trash baby is growing up!The crew was locked in place, afraid to do anything to set their leader off. When nothing but the clinking of plates and silverware were heard they all exhaled in relief. Those reports had better show up soon, they hoped.--------------Pomp was humming quietly to himself when the sound of fluttering paper interrupted him. Looking down he spotted a stack of papers with the top one addressed to the Red Ogre.Snickering to himself, he got up and skimmed the information, wondering what it was about. Eyes widening in alarm, he dashed out to give his Boss the reports. Had the Captain seen these, he would have known not to attack Jam. Ooh someone is in deep shit!"Um Boss, these were slipped under the door to the infirmary," the man huffed, having ran directly to his captain.Kid grunted, slurping down his pork ramen. He reached out, snatching the reports from his medic. In silence he read.Pomp had placed the page discussing her chemicals on top. Jam had done a little doodle of a coffee cup as she wrote how Dive was a nosy danger-prone shithead, who inspired her to share the antidote she used on herself to make the liquefaction serum inert against her own person, as well as her other common battle chemicals, like the knock-out gas.The bitch slipped this shit in everyone's coffee! Jam watched them more than he anticipated. She knew all but Hop and Skillet drank coffee every morning, so she put her concoction in the coffee pot and slipped some in Hop's tea and the pastry chef's milk. She knows our drinking preferences. Hop thought coffee had too much caffeine and preferred tea for its health and beauty benefits while Skillet couldn't drink anything bitter even if you added a boatload of sugar. He's such a baby. The Professor's reasoning for the slyness: Quincy had let her know how badly some of the crew reacted to being told to take any kind of medicine. Who the fuck took these reports?! And why?!
The next set of notes poked fun at Killer, with a small drawing comparing him to a pasta loving cat, but offered the construction of a pasta maker machine. She had options for noodle length, width, and thickness. Then for particular shapes she had die casts to mold the dough. It even made zoodles. Killer would love this thing. Why didn't I ever think of this?He chuckled at her doodles, till he saw the one of a tulip-haired pig stuffing his face. That cunt. I'm not a pig! This report was about the freezer with details of the components they needed to procure when they docked. There were lots of questions and several ideas for how to improve on the original basic construct. It was beautiful. She even wrote about blanching vegetables and what could be flash frozen. She found a way for him to always have cabbage and whatever else his heart desired. God dammit! I look like a royal dick-head.
The next report was a list of material she would be looking for when they docked. The list was absolutely massive, containing things from every kind of category imaginable. There were little stars next to things she was sure she could steal, tulips next to things she could harvest, and frowny faces on the things she may have to pay for. He snorted and decided he'd hand it off to Bubblegum later.The last page was a myriad of questions about his powers. They were detailed and she left lines for his responses. This bitch gave him homework. True he never attended school formally, but Killer had, teaching Kid how to read, write, and do basic computation. And the homework Killer gave him still made him sullen to this day. God damn mom.Skimming down to the bottom of the questionnaire, he saw a small sentence highlighted: "You can either answer these in person and I fill in the blanks or if you're being weird and shy, you do it and we pass it back and forth till I'm satisfied."The proud redhead gnashed his teeth, I ain't shy you mouthy gremlin. I was busy! he cursed, handing the notes to his partner and finished his meal in stony silence. I'll show you satisfaction...Pomp, relieved of his duty, grabbed a quick plate of food, before headed back to his post. Killer hissed at the first page describing her chemical antidotes, shaking in pure rage. "She snuck stuff in our coffee!""Not exactly. She was obliviously trying to let the boss know and she thought by his silence he was good with her plans. Besides it was medicine, not poison," corrected House.Blonde hair shook from side to side. "But it could have been anything. How did she slip past me in MY kitchen?! I should have noticed," Killer berated himself. The crew was becoming nervous. An agitated Kid was one thing; an agitated Killer was a whole different brand of chaos.Grunting he continued reading, his pace much quicker than his captains as he skipped all the technical details. The doddle she made had him vexed, until her proposal stopped him in his tracks. I'm not Garfield the damn cat! he shook with barely contained rage till he saw why she made the connection. "She designed me a pasta maker?" he questioned, his voice full of awe. It can make anything I want. It's the nicest thing I've ever seen.Dive smiled, despite the uncomfortable atmosphere, "I told her how much it would mean to us and she got right on it." Jam can be really nice when she wants to. Killer was at a loss for words. Pasta was life. Damn it. How could I be mad now?"Keep reading," Kid grunted with mouth full of fried chicken and mash potatoes.When the blonde saw the freezer and the ideas for food storage, he almost squealed aloud. "This freezer is the stuff dreams are made of." Being from a poor, lawless island, food insecurity was a big thing to several members of their crew. They all knew what it meant to go hungry. This freezer was a huge deal."Your such a food whore," the redhead snickered."And you aren't?""Suck my ass.""Before or after you pull your head outta it?" the blonde asked, earning a bark of laughter from his best friend. The other guys snorted, glad the tense atmosphere was broken at least for a minute.Killer read on, skimming the last two reports, passing them over to Heat and Wire afterwards. Before either could look at the notes, Pomp ran in. "She's gone!" Pandemonium broke out over the short man's exclamation.Kid was astonished. She should have been out for at least a full day. What in the hell is going on? Haki was useful but it only gave him a board idea of where she was. He still sensed her faintly, meaning she was somewhere on his ship. But where?Bubblegum sprinted away, deciding to check on something, his stomach suffering from sinking, panicked thoughts. Dashing back, he hollered, "She found the Den-Den Mushi. It's been moved!" I knew it was a bad idea from the start. That mad woman is going to be pissed.So that settled it. She scuttled off to her lab. Of course she went there. Where else would the little runt go?"Kid there's an angry Mad Scientist who just discovered we were spying on her, in an impervious monster jelly form on the loose in a lab stocked to the brim with dangerous chemicals and devices," Killer stated in a barely contained voice. This is bad. How the hell is she up and moving after that? We should have had time to formulate a plan.
God-dammit!
----------------It's kind of short for me, but it was either this or nothing. Work is evil and I've been swamped. Now Jam can't draw to save her life, so the doodles are goofy. But I had fun making them. For those reading on ff.net I post pictures on A03 and Wattpad.Kid seems to calm down a lot of the two year skip. From the man who mercilessly crucified the first pirate crew he came across in the New World to someone willing to enter into an alliance and actually uphold his end of the deal. Plus he lets Luffy have Kaido, without any kind of fight, even though he said he'd be the one to take Kaido's head. He works together with Law, sharing secrets of his power (that he has awakened it and what his awakening form does). That takes a maturity level I don't think he possessed before the timeskip.Personally I believe he attacked that crew because they insulted him (they implied the new World would eat the Kid Pirates alive) and because he wanted to test his strength out. Also he was kinda miffed about the attention both Blackbeard and Luffy were getting after MarineFord so I think he caused a scene to placate his ego. What a dick.
Spoilers:
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Chapter 1087:
No sign of either of my three supernova captains. Sigh. The chapter focuses on Garp and his battle with some of the Blackbeard pirates. It wasn't bad, just not the crescendo the leakers were making it out to be. Garp's just not high up on my favorite list. And his strength proves he could have saved Ace. I'll never forgive him. The fight between him and his old student is good though. Just kind of a letdown after such a long hiatus. That say Oda did a Garp chapter because the official release date falls on Marine Day in Japan but ew like I give a shit. Screw the government, all governments, fictional ones included!
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The crew was in a panic. Full on meltdown mode."Fuck she knows about our spying. She's going to kill us!" Boogie screeched, tears running down his face, ruining his smokey-eye."She left the little snail alive. That's a good sign right? Maybe the Professor's not as angry as we think," reasoned Compo. Oh who the fuck am I kidding? Anyone would be pissed in her shoes."How the hell is she even moving though? She should be knocked out for days!" Quincy shouted, fully grasping the extent of the injuries their fallen comrade sustained. That's an insane level of durability."Jam's a scientist. They often modify their body. We still don't know what she looks like. Who knows what she's done to herself," shrugged Bubblegum, thinking of cool things he'd add to himself if possible. A rocket launcher arm and laser eyes!The crew was tormenting themselves into a frenzy, imagining ever more unpleasant scenarios in their head. Like what if she was stuck somewhere injured? Or worse plotting their demise with some evil chemical concoction.The boot tapping rapidly increased its tempo, a major sign the head of the ship was losing his cool."Dive come here," Wire calmly spoke up, his deep baritone instantly calming. "Everyone else, put a lid on it, you're disturbing the Captain." Everyone froze, looking guiltily at their boss. Wire didn't talk often but when he did, no one ignored him. "We suspect she's in her lab. She likes you best, go check. See if she'll come out for you," he elaborated.The biter saluted her crewmembers, scurrying down to the basement floor of the Punk."Heat go stand watch outside of the lab. I don't think the Professor would attack the munchkin, but just in case."-----------------Meanwhile Jam took this opportunity to run for it. She waited several minutes after she saw Pomp dash out with a horrified grimace on his face. He held a stack of paperwork in his hands that looked very familiar. Why does he have my notes? And what about them could have possibly scared him so bad? Whatever, now's my chance.Stretching upwards, she slinked into the ventilation system and sank down to the bowels of the ship. She got lost a few times, not having traveled in there before, but it wasn't long before she made it to the bottom of the Punk. Peeking out of the duct she could see Kid's workshop.So if I go back and make a left, I'll land in my laboratory. Success! She was excited up until she spotted a tiny transponder snail in the vents above her work space. For several seconds she just blankly stared at the poor creature, her ire rising to insurmountable levels. That is not what I think is?! These dead motherfuckers!She began quaking in anger, causing the Den-Den Mushi to turn its head and faint at the sight of the gelatinous blob. Stretching an arm out, Jam seized the little snail before popping the vent open and jumping down to the floor. Hastily, she stuffed the poor fellow into a random pen drawer and got to work creating a mixture to assist in her recovery. I don't know how long I have till they notice I'm gone. Got to be fast.She plugged the sink and filled it up water before adding several chemicals and nutrients. Satisfied with what she had done, she slipped in and let the warm water soothe her aching body, the nutrient bath revitalizing her. She disappeared into the murky depths, knowing that it was unlikely anyone would check dirty looking sink water for her.Professor Inator's gelatinous form was similar in design to a single celled organism, simple and efficient. She was able to use her outer membrane to filter oxygen out of water, allowing her to breathe underwater. Two hours in here should do the trick. Then I'm going to murder this entire ship. These egregious wanker's never trusted us at all. Screw them!Dive's nice and so is House. I'm sure not everyone knew about the monitoring, another voice piped up.See Jam was split into different forms of herself, a consequence of a betrayal years ago. They were all pieces of Jam and they argued about how to best handle the situation. The personalities only let themselves be known when the madness crept in. Younger her was more emotional. Both kinder and crueler than her other selves. She was fire and brimstone, believing the pirate crew should pay with their lives for their insolence. We'll put a nasty mutating toxin in the vents and let them all suffer! Screw these twat waffles! That hulking asswipe needs to eat a bag of cheese dicks!Professor Jam was calculated, taking a measured response to the infraction, in order to efficiently get what she wanted. She was incredibly cold though. Making that toxin takes time and valuable resources. Time they could use to take a counteroffensive. We could sink the ship as a farewell gift. Fighting would take too long and they'd be scrambling to stay afloat. Our escape would be easy.Wise Jam believed in a softer approach. Giving the benefit of the doubt and only retaliating when absolutely necessary and after all relevant information had been analyzed. However, she was incredibly manipulative. We've regretted going nuclear before. And we do enjoy the company---- its good for us.
Fuck good for us. We're better off alone. He was so quick to assume the worse of us just like everyone else. Why is it that when you're smart people always think you're tricking them in some way? It's not fair!
We could subjugate them. Mind control isn't out of the question. They were useful killing those marines. A simple program could have them bound to our whims, making our food, taking care of the normal day to day tasks while we focus on our science. It wouldn't even take long. Just a few slight tweaks of their natural personalities and they'd be happy little minions.
I want nothing to do with them. Just looking at their stupid faces pisses me off. Traitors have no business in my vicinity.
As if we would be good with minions. If that were the case we could have subjugated someone else by now. Or even built a robot army. But we know where that leads. A repeat of that disastrous mistake is unwarranted. We should hide and see what everyone thinks. Several looked on sadly at our fight with the ape. And the Captain is a reactive individual---not exactly the sharpest tool you know. The idiot couldn't even make up mind on how to feel. He was petting us for fuck's sake while pouting. But he seemed genuinely remorseful. We should investigate further before drawing a conclusion. Besides I am curious what we could do with his abilities. I know we are all looking forward to the chaos a giant living magnet could create. And having people around lets us explore things we wouldn't think of. Muses are indispensable to our success. These imbeciles are amazed at damn near anything. A freezer, a pasta machine, glue...it's not like we don't already control them to a degree. We saw how quickly they annihilated those filthy dogs of the World Government. Simpletons have their uses. And truthfully, they are the only crew that can say that. It would be shame to lose all this over one disagreement. I'm sure we can work something out, see how far with can milk those feelings of remorse...
-----------------The professor's ever growing dark musings were interrupted by a high pitched voice. "Jam, are you in here?" Dive asked softly, looking around the lab for any sign of her friend. There was a combination of chemicals on the table, meaning the Professor had to be in here.It figures she'd be the one to seek me out first, Jam thought, the twinges of madness ebbing away with the arrival of a familiar comforting voice."I know we messed up and its unfair of me to even ask, but don't go. Please," the blonde begged, walking slowly around the lab. Not seeing any sign of the jellied woman, she sighed. "Boss wasn't getting your notes for some reason and he freaked out. It's no excuse but it's what happened. Killer's making him apologize and I don't think you know how big of a deal that is."From her spot in the sink, Jam seethed. Not receiving my notes? Was someone taking them? Because I pinned them to his stupid workshop door! And if you think an apology means jack shit to me, you're an even bigger dumbass than I thought! That's the least that insufferable beast could do!Oblivious to Jam's tirade, the tiny woman continued, "The captain's not so good with words when he makes a mistake. Getting a sorry out of him is like pulling teeth from a crocodile. He's stubborn. But he does show he feels bad for what he did with actions. He'll make it up to you somehow." Kid is rough around the edges but he's a great leader. He'll fix this.Jam sincerely doubted that. As if that rat bastard could redeem himself.Looking down at the floor and shuffling her feet guiltily, the younger woman continued, "I know we shouldn't have watched you like that. But you're so powerful! It's hard for our more cautious members to trust you. When it was my turn to watch you, I chose to hang out with you instead. I even volunteered for extra shifts and just made myself comfy in your lab. I knew you weren't dangerous to us. I never felt unsafe. I told the guys this was pointless and it they wanted to know what you were working on, all they had to do was ask."Smiling at the thought, the bubbly blonde rambled, "You're a really good dancer by the way. You have nothing to be embarrassed about," she teased, trying to lighten the somber mood. When the lab was this quiet, it had a sinister aura about it.Who said I was embarrassed? Jam asked, indignant at the very statement. In truth she never thought about them seeing her get her groove on. She just didn't liked to be spied on. It was a gross violation of her trust.The silence was unnerving, forcing something out that the blonde would never confess otherwise. "Most of the guys treat me like a child, dismissing me. It's rough. You don't belittle me like that. Stay," the usually bubbly woman pleaded. The other ladies act like I'm a baby and not fully grown even though I'm twenty-one.Internally, the Professor sighed. As it was she used up what little strength she amassed to travel down here and prepare her bath. There was no more energy left to move and comfort the blonde. Not that she deserved it. But Jam felt the strings of her heart tug when the quiet sobs broke out."I'm no leaving till you tell me to," Dive pouted, crossing her arms and throwing herself into a rolling chair.
Stubborn fool. You'll be waiting for quite some time.
------------------It had been only thirty minutes when the redheaded jackass barged his way in, Killer coming up behind him. "She still hiding out?""I can't find her anywhere but I know she's here," the blonde asserted, still sniffling slightly.Kid huffed. So crying didn't get you out, huh you cunt? "Feh, listen I know you can hear me and I'm only saying it once: I MAY have acted rashly. In my defense I hadn't gotten your notes. Next time don't sneak crap in people's food. Just tell us," the captain ordered, his voice booming across the lab.The first-mate of the ship hissed a single word to let his feelings be known, "Kid." That was the worse apology I ever heard.Kid got the message by the growl in his partner's voice. "Fuck," he swore under his breath. For a moment he stalled, shifting from side to side. "I'm sorry you looked guilty as hell," he mumbled quickly, causing the two blondes to smack themselves in the forehead, exasperated with his antics.Jam was torn between laughing and punching that sorry sack of shit in his big mouth. What kind of apology was that? Maybe Dive was serious and he really can't express his contrition in words. What a prideful dumbass.When no gelatinous blob emerged, Kid pointed and exclaimed, "See apologies are meaningless. It didn't change shit! Just made me feel sick. Blegh," the tall man pulled a face, dramatic as ever.After several moments passed, the Captain grinned nastily, "We're doing it my way now! Midget, if you don't come out now, I'm going start fucking around with all your chemicals and shit," he threatened, opening a random cabinet and peering nosily inside. Just some empty vials. How boring.Jam heard the clinking of glass and got apprehensive. This Neanderthal will blow us all sky high. Shit I still can't move very well. And I am not a midget you giant shit-faced cockmaster!"Kid we are not touching chemicals that could do any number of things to us," the masked man reprimanded.
Hooray for the furball. Thankfully, he has common sense.
The redhead side-eyed his second in command. "I'm not stupid it was a bluff. Figured she'd come out swinging if I insulted her and threatened to fuck with her crap," he whispered. Give me some credit you dildo.After a full minute of silence, the large redhead pouted, "Fine then, be that way. Since Killer's being a chicken-shit----," he was interrupted by a smack to the back of his head."Kid she may be weakened and too afraid to come out. That or she may have come here and then hidden someplace else to lick her wounds," the long haired man concluded, annoyed at his younger friend.Rubbing his chin thoughtfully, he replied, "Alright, we'll scour Vicky inch by inch till we find her. Dive you stay here in case she comes back," the Captain ordered, needing to keep himself busy."Aye aye Captain."--------------------Crewmembers were searching high and low for the little gremlin, shouting her name and beseeching her to come out. That they were sorry, the Captain was sorry, it was just a big misunderstanding...
These fucking losers. How pathetic. They sound like crybabies. And fatface-assface is about as sorry as I am tall. I've seen toddlers offer a more heartfelt apology.
House had joined Dive, bringing down the professor's things and the crystals she made. Jam was sure she saw Heat pacing in the hallway. Good they should be worried. I could have killed Dive easily. "Um Jam if you're here, everyone is sorry. They're pleading for you come out all over the ship," the calm woman said softly. Why can't one of them act like a grown-up?I know, she moaned, having improved her hearing to superhuman levels years ago. Normally she kept her hood up, blocking out all the unnecessary, distracting noise. But when she needed to, Jam would drop it, giving her the ability to hear over long distances. It helped her find elusive targets and spy on the marines. But now all I can hear is these idiots weeping. Ugh! She sank further down, letting the water muffle the noise. She could still hear the conversation of two nearby."I brought your things, didn't even look though them. Oh and I used your gloves to turn those marines into crystals for you."
At least someone has enough brain cells to be useful. And keep out of my lab coat, I have dangerous devices stored in there. It's good you neglected to snoop or someone would be peeling your remains off the wall.
The two small women started telling her about previous betrayals their captain faced, explaining why the man was so sure he had been deceived. The poor sod had some shitty luck. Jam was ready to bash her head against the nearest hard surface. Quit making me feel bad!-----------------By now, it was mid afternoon and everyone had gotten a chance to read the reports left behind. The things the Professor was working on were amazing. And the questions about Kid's powers showed she wanted to help him develop new techniques. They could not let a valuable asset slip through their greedy fingers."Look whoever stole these needs to come clean. Because this whole mess is their fault. Jam got injured and now she is hiding either in fear of her safety or because she's plotting revenge," Forte ordered, his displeasure showing. This whole fucking day has been a waste."My money is on the latter. She's not your typical opponent. The real danger lies with her intelligence. We have no idea what nasty shit she picked up from her lab and we have no way to combat it either," Whitney explained. I am not becoming some science experiment. I'm too talented for that.Everyone scanned the room with uneasy eyes."Sacrifice yourself and plead for forgiveness. She seems the type to enjoy groveling," Emma pointed out. Ooh I'd beg for it...Agreeing with that sentiment, Thrill added, "In my comic books, Mad-Scientists always like it when you beg for mercy.""You comparing her to comic book villain?" Dick J deadpanned. This dorky ass mofo."Well she's definitely dramatic enough," the nerdy man grumbled."The potato-gremlin might kill whoever admits to this shit. Are we good with losing one of us?" Hop asked, worried for her sister. Please Hip. Please don't let it be you."We can beg too," Jaguar offered."She likes Dive and House. She works with Quincy and Pomp. And she's always polite to Skillet and Heat. I've even seen her joke with Bubblegum a few times when he brings her food. We'll have those guys plead hardest," Mosh said, smacking his fist into his other palm."I'll make snacks, Jam likes those!" Skillet volunteered, cooking being a self-soothing activity for the nervous man."Idiot snacks aren't going to save us," UK bit out, hitting the green haired man over his head."Actually have you seen her eat? She chews neatly but she put away three full plates of pasta last night. For a tiny woman, that's a lot. Jam clearly likes food," Moai replied, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. Maybe the smell of some food will get her to come out.Skillet nodded, grabbing Hip and heading to the stove. "Come on, snacks will calm the Boss too," the pastry chef smiled.I don't want to make HER snacks! Hip frowned.----------------Slowly the scientist was able to move properly. I'm pretty much healed up now. Still low on energy reserves, so it would behoove me to lie low, but dammit, I can't take their damn blubbering. It's like back home when my shitty baby brothers whine and cry after they piss me off and have to suffer the consequences of my wrath. Drives me batshit! Only now mom's not here to beg me to forgive the buffoon's...wait a damn minute, that's what House is doing! It's just like home! She screeched, letting out incomprehensible garbles of rage.By now she heard of how some idiot stole the notes she made for the Captain. Why? No one knew. Who? They didn't know for sure, but were afraid to tell her their hunches incase she tried to kill the moron. Which is a very valid point. Could probably dust for fingerprints...They had begged for forgiveness saying it was just fear that led to the spying. I mean she took them out and traumatized them thinking she had killed everyone. Oops...And when they realized that this endeavor was pointless they had to continue least the risk the wrath of Killer. Wrath of the killer floof...But truthfully, the crew barely paid their scientist any mind, blowing off the unnecessary work of spying. The short duo had decided to go hang with Jam instead of watching her. The two ladies carefully left out how much their Boss liked to watch Jam dance, often kicking everyone out so he could enjoy her performance in peace. He was a pervert, but they weren't going to rat him out. Plus it might make her angrier.Sighing, Professor Inator made a decision. She lifted a small tendril and waved it around. Dive, ever a vigilant scout, spotted the movement almost instantly. "JAM!" she squealed, jumping up and running to the sink.House let out a deep sigh of relief. She's here. Thank-goodness."I knew you wouldn't abandon us!" Dive hugged the offered limb.The tendril sank back into the muck, intent of healing completely. I need about fifteen more minutes to be ready in the event of round two."I'm going to go tell everyone you're ok," House sighed, ready to end this horrid day.A jellied hand shot up and motioned a no."Why not? Everyone is worried," the slightly taller woman asked with her hands on her hips. No don't you be belligerent like the captain. Please. I'm tired.Jam formed a thumbs-up and then flipped them off."Good. Fuck them?" Dive ventured, snickering to herself.The hand signaled a yes, before dropping back down."Jam that's not how we handle things here. Everyone is in a bad state right now. We get attached quickly," she muttered, her face flushed. Childish as hell the both of them! The blob held up five fingers. "Ok, five more minutes. Guess you need a moment to compose yourself."-----------------The captain was getting restless. No one had seen one sticky trace of the shrimp. Tapping his foot in a huff, he reached for his tankard, chugging down some ale. We looked everywhere. Did she escape? She'll die in the ocean in her condition. God-dammit!Taking in a large calming breath, he rationalized his thoughts. No her energy signal is there albeit faintly, all her stuff is here. She couldn't leave without her things.House entered the gallery with a pleased and relaxed expression. Right before he yelled at her to 'Wipe that stupid smirk off yer damn face!' she shouted, "We found Jam!"His relief was instantaneous. She hadn't just deserted them. And so far she hadn't hurt anyone. He just had to put on the charm and calm her down. The crew sighed, glad for the reprieve. Any longer and their captain might have lost it.-----------------Kid took Killer and followed House down to the lab. The jellied midget was sitting on her examination table, next to Dive. Spotting her lab coat and boots on the table as well, Kid came to a dawning realization, one he was surprised he didn't grasp sooner. "You're naked aren't you?" he delightfully inquired. That means she was naked in the med-bay!A purple appendage shot out and slapped him across his face. This dirty jackass! That's the first thing you say to me!The tall redhead smirked, too excited to get angry. Besides she was still weak, so the slap lacked her usual strength. "Covered from head to toe on the regular, but you fight buck-ass naked. Make sense you crazy cunt."The blob marched right up to him and stretched so that she was eye level with him. It's not like my amorphous form has specific body part locations. You're so gross!The leader of the pirates slapped his knee, his eyes full of mirth. "If you turned yourself into a jelly monster just so you can be taller, I'm going to die," he smiled widely, his glee overtaking his face.Jam bounced up and down, hopping mad. You'll die regardless you loser! Tick marks decorated the space were her face would be. You are such a dick Eustass Kid!Killer scratched his mask, feeling awkward with the topic of conversation, "Are you stuck that way or something. Can't you change back?" A jellied arm reached into a drawer and pulled out a pen and a sheet of paper. "I heal faster in this form," she wrote.Kid studied the bouncing blob for a second. "Her presence is almost at normal levels. I knew she was fine," the captain asserted. "Look what's done is done. No use crying over spilled ale---" he flippantly began.Faster than anyone could react, the scientist dashed into the vent, keeping her hold on the pen and paper she had. All this is nothing to you! You're pretending like everything is all peachy. I was willing to hear you out and this is how you act? Fuck you, Used-Ass Kid!"Kid you have the tact of a rusty cannon. All you did was stick your foot in your mouth and make her angry," scolded his right hand man."How the fuck did I do that? I barely said anything!""Boss you could write a book, How to Piss Off People in Ten Syllables or Less," teased the bubbly blonde.The masked soldier snorted, delving into lecture mode. "You implied that this entire ordeal was nothing and she should just get over it. The professor used some advanced science to heal faster, but we know those injuries of hers hurt like hell. Your punches are deadly and she tanked one at full rage-fueled force. Just because she is fine now doesn't make her suffering inconsequential.""I didn't mean it like that. Quit putting words in my mouth!" Kid retorted with a snarl."That's how she interpreted it," House added with a groan. Boss you insulted her the second you saw her. And pointed out she was naked. Only you would make that connection. You keep insulting her, like some little boy with a first crush."Fucking crybaby," their leader pouted, crossing his arms across his muscular chest.Killer's electric blue eyes twitched, wondering if his partner realized how hypocritical he sounded. Pot meet kettle. Hmm, a kettle has a pour spout, like a dick. Kid's the kettle, the Professor the pot....more like the kettle needs to fuck the pot, he silently chuckled.---------------------Without the author's notes---approximately 4300 words. Not too bad.Slowly but surely you'll see Jam for who she is. There are a lot of mad scientists but few of them feel truly mad. I want her to be all over the damn place. I'd reveal more but I don't want the focus to be solely on her. So everyone gets little snippets of their personality peaking out. It's fun!Kid loves to trash talk. He can't help himself when it comes to Jam; she's a worthy shit-talking opponent.Was watching some Youtube clips, and people pointed out that Kid does not properly make use of his fruit. Fair point but that's on Oda. Oda just wants to make big metal robots. That's why I believe he doesn't fully utilize Kid's Electromagnetic abilities. Plus then he'd be OP. Like Kid should be able to redirect Big Mom's lightening and use it for himself. He should be able to make impenetrable force fields. He can fly. He flies on punk rotten. But I think Oda is trying to do him differently than other magnet users. It kinds nerfs him though and I hate it. And no one is in awe of his robots unlike Franky's and his are way cooler. No hate on Franky though. I love the big ham. Just isn't very fair. I think the guys don't because the hell if they'll admit he's cool. Could you imagine Law or Luffy calling him awesome? Hehe. I just wish people would stop calling Kid stupid.
Spoilers for 1088:
0000000000000000000000000000000000000000It's another marine chapter. Boo! I just don't really care for Koby or Helmeppo. So bust of a chapter. And damn Oda leaving the fate of Garp up in the air. I need clear alive or dead status sir. Status: unknown equals bullshit.Why I'm not a fan of the pink haired marine: Koby knows Hancock is an ally of Luffy (he was at MarineFord), but he still goes to arrest her and low key threatened the safety of her island. While the Snake-Princess isn't one of my favorite people (she kicked a kitty and the age gap thing with Luffy is weird), I respect the strength it took to survive and later flourish after being a slave. Now I wonder if this will be a plot-point. Luffy has many allies but not all of them will be ok with one another. Clearly Koby won't extend the same courtesy he gives Luffy to his other pirate allies. If one ally dies as a result of another, is the one alive still considered an ally of Luffy by the rubber man's standards? But in two weeks we're back on Egghead? Ah I can't wait. Boo break week!
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Jam hightailed it through the ventilation system, quickly arriving in the kitchen, before vaulting to the deck. She slid down the side of the ship, drawing water into her body and drastically expanding her form. Several crewmembers flew out of the gallery's door, excitedly calling out her name. Ignoring the commotion, Jam wrapped tendrils of herself around the ship. Let's see him cage me now, with half my body underwater. He would have to trap the ship's occupants with no air, considering her size. She was huge, her Napoleon complex shining through. Who's tiny now motherfucker! The crew gasped at her, wondering how big their scientist could get and realizing that the situation had not improved in the slightest.Kid made it to deck just in time to see what looked like a gelatinous Kraken wrapped around his ship. Several thick bright purple appendages were coiled around the main deck and a bulbous head was situated on top of the crow's nest. As soon as the mad woman spotted the Punk's insufferable captain, she squeezed, the ship making a creaking and groaning noise in response.Kid's golden orbs widened in shock and horror. "What in the hell are you doing woman?! I thought we were good! Get down here now!" This is how she planned to survive in the sea! That shrimp can turn into a fucking sea monster!Miffed at his tone and his attempt at giving her an order, she grabbed the main mast and tugged lightly."Oh no hold on. We can talk," he pleaded nervously. My SHIP! No no not Vicky! You crazy woman. Calm your tits!To her pleasure, Jam smiled at the usually brash man's demure attitude. I'm getting a proper apology.Grey eyes filled with mirth. "Told you she don't take no shit. She's holding the Punk hostage. Ballsy ass bitch," Clash laughed aloud.Joplin and Hip bristled and frowned at their taller friend, karate chopping her on the head. "Why is this funny to you?! We could all die!""I'm a good swimmer," the tall woman deadpanned, their hits not affecting her.House let out a long exhale, rubbing at her temples. I calmed Jam down for that bullheaded ass to throw all my hard work down the drain. I could scream!Heat placed a calming hand on the woman's shoulder, noticing her mood. "It will be fine. If Jam was truly mad, she'd have already left. I think her feelings are hurt. Killer will stop Master Kid from doing anything too stupid." House smiled, hoping her lanky friend was right.The redhead raised his hands in surrender. "Look I'm sorry we spied on you. But hell you're funny as fuck to watch. And we only placed the camera in the lab. It's not like we watched your bedroom or anything," he said with a toothy grin, his big mouth the primary source of his bad luck.Heat bowed his head in embarrassment, as House slapped her palm against her own. I can already feel the migraine. Jam hadn't even thought of that. Mortified, Kid received a slap in return, a giant jellied arm smacking him down to the deck.He knew better than to dodge and risk his vessel's safety. "It was all Killer's idea, I swear!"Killer clenched his fists, in disbelief at Kid's childish antics. It was OUR idea and you were all for it!Professor Inator was seething. This dirty douchebag! First he notices I'm naked in this form because of course the perverted dicktard notices and now he casually talks about spying on me in my bedroom! He's so damn gross! I should gouge his piss-colored eyeballs out!Jam hastily scribbled on her sheet of paper. The note was laid in front of the brute, "And who's the captain of the ship? Any bad decisions have to be run by you first. Don't skirt your responsibilities," he read aloud.The redhead sighed, pulling himself up into a sitting position. "Alright fine. You got me. So what do you want?" If she really wanted to go, she'd had left before I go to the deck. She wants something...Ohh let's play. I was going to be mature due to House's urging, but the only thing your stupid ass understands is fighting fire with fire. We'll see how you handle being screwed with. She took the paper and wrote, "The thief's head."Sharp exhales were heard around the ship.A large metal hand waved itself angrily in her face. "No you said it, I'm the Captain so their crimes fall on my shoulders. You want a head, take mine," he said jerking his thumb to point at his own person. As if you could, monster form or not.Jam figured he'd choose this route. She wrote more on her paper, "You're valuable and I believe in taking my rage out on the object of my discontent. I won't kill them; just maim them a bit.""I'm the one who didn't trust you. I'm the one who conked you over your skull. Not whichever dumbass committed the theft! You need a punching bag, I'm right here," Kid shouted, confident in his durability."I don't care. I want what I want," she demanded, delicately clenching her body, the ship softly moaning. Half an apology. At least he's admitted to his crimes."You can't have any of them! And I don't even know who's responsible!"
He's kinda cute when he's looking out for everyone. Come on, you moron. Think. What do I really want?
Kid huffed, considering all his options, but not liking the conclusions he came to. "Fine, you can go. I won't stop you. Just leave the ship and my crew intact," the redhead relented, seeing no way out of this. I won't trade one subordinate for another."Boss!" several voices shouted.Jam snorted to herself. He's such a fool. I wouldn't still be here if I wanted to leave. I could have swam away bolts for brains.The Punk's Captain shook his head. "We're too far out to survive making it back to land. I can't hold her hostage without it killing her and potentially us, so what's the point? And somehow tiny's too big right now for me to cage anyway. What am I supposed to do?""Apologize. Properly. Beg even. She's been here two weeks and has since fixed tons of issues we have," Killer stated in his annoyingly calm voice, making Kid glower. How have you not figured out what she wants?"I already did that. It was gross and didn't do shit!" he pouted, crossing his arms.Dive rolled her eyes. "Boss that was a sad excuse of an apology and you know it!"Bubblegum put his hands up in a placating manner and approached his captain. "Look I may not know the Professor as well as Dive or House, but I pop down there and deliver stuff to get out of spying duty. She wants you to say sorry and mean it Boss."Kid smashed his lips together, contemplating his options. He hated the idea of begging, but if he could save his ship and crew while also keeping his scientist...Roger's saggy balls! "If I apologize for myself and for the thief will you stop trying to sink us?"The blob nodded. Aw I was gonna fuck with him longer. Well I can always tease him later. Damn masked asshole helping him. No shit I want an apology numbnuts."Will you stay?" the spiky haired man murmured."If you're sincere," she wrote."Kid weigh out the benefits. She's useful in a way we could never replicate. Is your pride worth it?" his oldest friend chided."I'm sorry," he whispered, his head down and his eyes focused on anywhere but her. The laces on his boots were exceedingly interesting at the moment.Pfft, he's acting like this is killing him. What a ham. As if that quiet little sorry is acceptable. A gelatinous limb oozed towards him and pushed down lightly on his shoulder. She now knew how to get at him best. Captain Kid was a proud man. Hurting his pride was better than physically wounding him as those types of injuries he could handle just fine. Fuck he bragged about old battle scars."I ain't going down on my knees!" he sputtered, his cheeks reddening. An appendage slipped down and tripped him, forcing the brute to kneel. Another one slid under the tall man's chin, making him look up. "Why are you such a fucking bitch?" Kid hissed, his enraged eyes popping out of his skull. There's got to be way to hurt her in this form besides trapping her.The 'Kraken' shook softly, resembling giggling jello."Is she laughing?" Mosh whispered aghast."Oh my god, she's screwing with him," stammered Boogie."That cunt," Hop hissed in disbelief. "Hey bo---" A hand slapped itself over her mouth, muffling her shouts."No stop. This is the only way she forgives him. Let her have her fun so this shit is over," Wire instructed softly. Jam likes pushing the Boss's buttons. Worse, she's good at it.
Oh this is gold. Look at this angry tulip; he's flushed so red in the face, his body looks even paler!
"I'm sorry dammit," he shouted, his cheeks turning rosy. This little cocksucker! She just has to humiliate me!The paper danced airily in his face "For?" he screeched, annoyed with her demands. "Fuck your 'for!' I said sorry already and that's all you're getting you greedy cunt!"That's probably the best I'm going to get with an audience. I'll take a raincheck I suppose. Jam released the water she pulled in, shrinking to her normal size. The blob was bouncing up and down, the bubbling noise growing ever louder.Kid eyes twitched, his lips pressing into a thin line. "Are you laughing at me?!"The blob nodded enthusiastically.Kid's face spasmed in fury. Electricity cackled at his long fingertips. Heat and Wire slapped an arm over each shoulder while Killer stood in front of him. It only made Jam bounce more erratically. Ooh you wanna fight again big boy? Let's dance."Don't. It's unrealistic to expect her to forgive you again. You bashed her skull in and all she wanted was to embarrass you. Take it like a man and let it go. You don't want the Professor dead and there's a good chance she's thought of a way to counter the containment box. If you lose, the rest of us don't stand a chance," ordered the ship's first-mate. She has the ship; there's no way we all make it out alive so far from shore. Still the little witch would probably let us go seeing as Kid's the only one she's messed with...not that I'd tell him that.If the Professor had a mouth it would be taken over by the largest shit-eating grin in all the four blues. Aw dammit. I was gonna toss him into the sea before fishing him out. For funsies.Kid hissed in protest, the same bloodthirsty rage he felt towards her back on that shithole island surfacing. "She made a mockery outta me!" he screamed, a typhoon of obscenities soon following.Jam bubbled louder. He's such a theatrical twat."And you didn't immediately apologize after you hit her and instead got that rematch you craved so bad. This is your reward for playing stupid games.""You're supposed to be on my side," the younger of the two practically whined.Killer sighed. "I am Kid. This is the best option for you. For us. You're the Captain, shoulder the burden and quit being a little prick. No one but the crew knows what she did and no one here is going to tease you. Calm down."The leader of the fearsome pirate crew took in a long deep breath, closing his eyes and attempting to focus on all of Jam's useful talents. The Professor wanted nothing more than to continue, but it looked like everyone else had enough. Dive is antsy and House seems tired... I guess this is it. Foo.Killer smiled affectionately behind his mask. He's been trying so hard lately. "I don't have all the stuff to make cabbage rolls as it's been twelve days out at sea, but I can make you fried fish and shrimp fried rice for dinner. And after she builds that freezer, you can have whatever you want whenever you like."Amber eyes narrowed suspiciously. "You just want that damn pasta maker."Despite the situation, little hearts danced over the muscled blonde's head. "Yes I do," he said with no hesitation. "Along with all those pharmaceuticals she makes and the energy crystals and all the other shit she probably knows how to make. Like you said, Jam's valuable. A damn treasure in her own right. We're pirates Kid; we don't miss out on treasure.""I want pork cutlet too!" Kid grumbled, reluctantly agreeing with Killer. Yeah she's valuable but she's a cunt!"Fine, fine," the blonde relented, patting his partner on the back and ushering him away.------------------------Kid stoops down, bending at his knees to yell at Luffy several times in Wano. That pose is automatic---he frequently argues with someone drastically shorter than himself. It has to be a crewmember. And it's not one of his main guys (Killer, Wire, and Heat) as they are too tall.Tulip boy matures a lot over the course of the two year time skip. He doesn't kill Luffy in the jail when he has the chance (brags how nice he's being---so ridiculous) and doesn't sink those samurai's when everyone is gathering for the ambush, even though he's says he wanted to. When Caribou is talking shit about his losing his arm, Kid throws a pickaxe at him to scare him even though he could have impaled him for such disrespect. He also does not kill Apoo after everything. I think pre-time skip he would have. Kid's mellowed a bit.Jam is the oldest of eight. Older siblings are dicks; they may act as a third parent and take care of things but they love teasing people and generally being an asshole for no reason. Younger siblings are brats and middle children are either just trying to survive or completely don't give a fuck. None of her brothers are here and Kid makes it so easy for her to mock him.Sometime Friday or Saturday I'm updating the Character Sheet with ages and other little tidbits. I have the next chapter already written other than editing it. I will post either late Sunday or early Monday depending on work. Please vote, kudos, comment, review, or interact in some way so I know this is worth continuing. I despise silence and feedback is greatly appreciated. -----------------
Spoilers for 1089:
00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000We get an update on Luffy and Co! Yay. It's been so long. But their fights from over ten chapters ago were off-screened----I hope this isn't a sign of what's to come. It feels rushed and nothing ruins a manga worse than rushing towards the end. Maybe Oda wants to hide how they defeated the Seraphim; perhaps he has plans for them later. He recently revealed in an interview how he wanted to have fun with the ending....this worries me because at heart the man is a troll. Luffy is already goofy; toon-force makes it worse and I can't handle anymore. Oda specially does things to make the anime not serious and sometimes it's a bit much.Ooh York is still trying to bargain with a corrupt government. She's outta there. I hope the escaped scientists make it out ok—yeah see any knowledge they don't control or don't want out and bam you're expendable. Stupid Saturn ordering their death on the slim chance they know anything about the Void Century.
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Jam slithered down the stairs, heading back to her lab. When Dive made to follow her, a large hard shot up and made a stopping motion. I require a moment to myself.She got her paper out and wrote give me fifteen minutes. "I need to transform back and I won't do that with an audience."Dive blushed and nodded, turning around. "She's gotta go change." Guess no peeking for me.--------------------A normally dressed Professor made it back to the deck. She was tired as hell, so just in case, she loaded her gloves with something extra destructive if necessary. I'm not taking any chances. That numskull is unpredictable.Heavy footfalls rushed up on her, a large shadow looming over her petite form in a flash. "I don't appreciate being fucked with," the tall redhead hissed, his amber eyes narrowed to slits.Jam crossed her arms over her chest. "And I don't like cheap shots. What's done is done, no use crying over spilled ale, huh Captain?" she taunted, causing Kid to grind his teeth, ticked off by her sarcasm."Mouthy bitch.""Inarticulate barbarian.""Psychotic cunt.""Hotheaded asshole!""Tiny gremlin!""Colossal twat-waffle!""I have to bend down just to be eye level with you!" he said, crouching at his knees and shoving his forehead against the petite woman's.His ridiculous antics ticked Jam off. "Good your stupid face is in striking range!""Ah-ha so you admit you're a shorty!""No shit you soulless-ginger clown!"The jibe had Kid seething, forcing Killer to step in, grabbing his partner by the arm. "Why didn't you explain yourself to someone?" the blonde asked.Brown eyes narrowed in anger. "I would have told the Bastard but he's been hiding for days now. Every time I try to find him, poof! No captain," Jam shouted, throwing her hands up over her head."You can report to Killer," Kid huffed.The small woman balled her fists by her side. "I didn't join because of the masked fuzz. I joined because of you. And while Killer's very clever, he doesn't have the type of intelligence I need. He's smart in things like history, reading comprehension, cooking, music, the artsy kind of intelligence. I need someone good at math, at building, at spatial recognition---you! There's no point in trying to explain my work to him. Do you have any success in telling him about engines and stuff?""Well no. He nods, but never at the right time. I can tell when he's lost. It's funny," Kid admitted, shooting a boyish grin at his best friend. It hilarious when he's lost. He gets so pissed off."Exactly. Killer and math don't mix," the scientist concluded, having tried to explain a chemical equation to the man before. Killer was surly, sore the two were talking like he wasn't there."So how come Bubblegum, who is dumber than Killer, can follow along just fine?" asked the tall redhead."That's because Bubblegum is good with numbers. He handles the money so his mind works likes yours does.""Oh.""Yeah oh, you big brute."It was silent for a minute.Putting on his authoritative voice, Kid commanded, "You can't just go around doing whatever you please.""I made you guys immune to my top chemicals so that everyone would be safe should a situation get out of hand. Quit acting like I poisoned you," Jam snorted. Look at him slipping on his big boy pantaloons and acting serious."Something that important is a topic you need to discuss with me directly.""Haven't you been listening? I tired. You ran. And I still don't know why." And not knowing anything bothers the shit outta me."I was NOT running. There were other more important things on my mind. Captain things, you wouldn't understand," he teased, proud of himself for his smooth comeback.One eyebrow rose in contempt and mockery of the man. "As if anything you do is beyond my comprehension," Jam hissed.The two stared each other down, neither willingly to concede. "Next time if for whatever reason you can't get hold of me, tell Killer it's of utmost importance," the notorious pirate ordered.She sighed but nodded in acceptance. "Fine, I'll go through your girlfriend when you're busy being Captain shithead." Those two asshats are tied at the hip.Think of the benefits. Don't acknowledge the girlfriend comment. Killer thought, his fingers gripping his gauntlets. Kid glowered, but let the insult slide. Today had been long.The room was still tense, making the little woman shuffle her feet. "So you'd probably be mad I collected DNA samples of the crew," she muttered, placing her hands behind her back, sheepishly. Faces were dumbfounded. She WHAT?!"How the fuck did you manage that?" Killer exclaimed, his eyebrows vanishing into his fluffy bangs. What was she hoping to discover?"For starters you shed like a cat," she explained with a roll of her eyes. "All I did though was walk behind everybody and pull out a hair or two. Nobody pays any attention to little ole' me," Jam said, shrugging her shoulders. I made a fun game out of it."I would notice someone coming up behind me and yanking out a hair. Besides how did your munchkin ass even reach the top of my head?" Kid snorted, frowning.Professor Inator placed her hands on her hips and scoffed, "You were the easiest, Mr. I Have No Concept of Personal Space. You kept leaning directly on top of me with your heavy ass self that day we worked together in your workshop."Kid blushed as deeply as his maroon coat, his crew giving him knowing looks. "It was easier to work like that. You're so small you get fit in between me and the workbench." She noticed?! Fuck but she didn't say anything. What the hell does that mean?Before she could tease the redhead further, Killer interrupted, "When did you do this?" Don't need these two going at it again."Two days ago. I study DNA. Since most of you are from the same island, I sought to see what type of genetics I was dealing with. I catalogue that kind of data. Did you know you guys remove your bandages often because of a skin allergy? I'm working on a hypoallergenic gauze right now, just need to get some supplies when we dock." Found out a bunch of other stuff too..."Gauze?" That can't be the only reason...Wire thought."Yeah gonna need aloe and conforming cotton muslin. And some other plants for particular extracts." A sea of confused faces greeted her, forcing Jam to further explain her reasoning. "When I was building the power adaptor with the captain, I noticed he kept altering his mechanical arm lightly and scratching at where it connected to his flesh. Figured it was a skin sensitivity, but knew the thin-skinned dickhead would balk and sulk if I even suggested it. To test my hypothesis, I asked Quincy if she had trouble keeping you lot in bandages. She and Pomp went on a mad rave about how often you guys remove dressings, reopening wounds. They were up in arms over it. Both then told me how difficult it is to get most of the crew to take any kind of medicine or stay in the medical bay to properly recover. That's why I slipped that antidote in the coffee by the way. I also offered to make them a really potent sedative for difficult patients."Kid was floored. She studied our DNA? What is she up to? Shorty noticed how my stupid nub bothers me. How it gets itchy and inflamed. And she's making some type of specialized bandage in response. It's like he couldn't be mad her despite how invasive her actions were. Part of him believed she did it on purpose. If only he knew how right he was.Joplin stomped her foot, angrily pointing at the little woman. "That! That's why it's hard to trust you! You know everything about us, reading those marine reports and then studying us like animals and we know zilch about you!" It's why I stole those notes. You untrustworthy piece of crap!The gremlin hummed thoughtfully, pondering the other pirate's outburst. It the first time that one has ever spoken to me. So I'm hard to trust, am I? It's not like you've put any effort into getting to know me, you rude bitch. "Well what do you want to know?""I don't fucking know. Just anything. Everything," the woman grumbled, throwing her hands into the air, exasperated."Well that's vague as shit, you asshole," the petite woman sneered."Ladies night. Like you did with Dive and House, but with all of us. We can talk then," said Hop, crossing her arms across her chest. If the professor's staying, we need to get to know her better. The only reason I think she didn't sink us was she likes Dive and House.The men looked on ominously, wondering what the ladies were up to. Some of them thought it unfair but they knew the pitfalls of getting in Hop's way. She was scary on a good day."Sure but not tonight. I'm tired," the scientist complained.The tall slender woman sighed. "Tomorrow we will be arriving at port. Everyone will be preoccupied. Depending on the greeting we get when we arrive we may be busy the entire span of our visit. I'll get back to you then on the details.""Fine by me," the small woman replied airily.Kid tuned his subordinates out, processing what Jam said. She helps whoever comes to her. You just gotta talk to the little gremlin and bam, a solution to your problems. "Woman how many things have you been working on?"Vaulting from one emotion to the next, the scientist beamed, happy to discuss her scientific ventures. "I've got over twenty-six projects in the works. I get bored. Kinda out of materials to work with though," she finished with a pout, her mood ever changing. Well bored and I know how easy it is to get what I want in exchange. I would rather spend all day inventing a new gauze then do any the crap the others guys do. Eugh work..."That's crazy. How?" Bubblegum asked flabbergasted."Until today I wasn't worried about being attacked. So I could focus all my efforts on my science. I've been getting a lot done.""Why?" questioned Reck, curious why anyone would want to work constantly."I want to understand all that I can. I just like to invent and discover things. I don't really care what," the professor admitted. "I mean some research has greater utility than other research, but new things are always a plus."Question marks danced over her crew heads, making the petite inventor awkwardly continue. "I like to live comfortably, unrestrained by my environment. You wanna know how I came up with my dehydrator? I craved raisins during winter, except the sunlight and moisture levels in the air weren't optimal to properly dry out the grapes. But fuck all if I was going to be dependent on the damn sun. I want something, I'm going to have that something, end of discussion." Is it really so hard to understand I like what I do? They work hard at being pirates, all the training and whatnot; what's the difference?"Kinda bratty ain't ya?" Kid said, provoking the small woman."No I'm resourceful. Bratty would mean I expected someone else to handle my problems. I took care of shit myself," she defended, with a glare."Fair enough. But shouldn't you focus on more important things?" Wire asked."What's the point of my intelligence if I don't make whatever I feel like? I designed that freezer because guess what I love to eat too. And while I don't have any skin allergies, you guys do and why make you suffer if I can fix it?" Plus it will keep the grouch from being as petulant.The pirates were speechless by her rationale. No one really helped them just because they could.Jam's been inventing for years, she's had to come across tons of other crews. Anyone could have had her, their own personal scientist, and all they had to do was not betray her and let her invent in peace. All on her own she comes up with useful shit. Dammit, Kid thought feeling a bit guilty for his actions, unconsciously tucking himself into his coat. If she just quit with her shitty remarks…--------- --------- ----------Dinner had been exceptionally quiet, Jam eating quickly and retiring to bed. I need sleep. As soon as she left, the crew rounded on their boss.He raised his flesh hand in surrender. "I know. Drop it," he bit out."We're lucky all she wanted was an apology," Killer admonished, from his place at the stove, frying up some pork cutlet."You don't think she still wants the thief's head?" Gig asked softly, worried for everyone."Probably not. She was messing with Master Kid again," Heat explained exhaling slowly. She fights fire with fire, a dangerous combination with our leader."Stupid rotten cunt. Foul shortstack," the tall pale man growled, thinking of how he pissed he was at her for embarrassing him."Boss, you did try and kill her," Quincy sweat-dropped. All in all she was much more reasonable than I thought she'd be. We probably have House to thank for that.Kid slammed his steel fist down on the table. "I thought she killed you guys!"Their leader's outburst threw a gloomy cloud over everyone. They too had assumed the worse initially. Looking around and observing the melancholy atmosphere, Joplin snorted. "That cunt is up to some shit with that DNA crap," the pinkette hissed. Forks and knives clattered at her words, the mood souring further. Even Kid stopped eating. "What like dissecting us and studying our weak points for the best way to take us down?" Heat asked morbidly. Dive pouted, glaring at Joplin. "Its not like she can't already beat us. Jam just let us know she could sink the ship with ease." Oh you are so jealous. Quit making stuff worse with your big mouth. "Then what's her angle? Just being helpful?" asked Hip with skepticism. "Examining things is just what scientists do. Quit being all weird. It the Professor wanted us to suffer, she'd have done that shit already," Bubblegum sighed, lazily eating a bite of fried fish. Before things went downhill, Emma decided to lighten the mood. "So what's this we hear of you being Mr. No Concept of Person Space?" The other crew members clamped their mouths shut, eager to hear how their boss wiggled his way out of this one."Fuck off Emma," the captain hissed, his face flushing slightly. I thought they forgot about that....But the young woman wasn't done with her taunting. "You had to be really up on her for that shorty to reach your head. What too focused on her rump to notice what the professor was up to?" she snickered.Kid cocked his head, glaring at the woman, who cheeky demeanor was irking him. "She managed to get hair from all of us. Even Wire and he wears a cape and cowl over his hair. She's a sneaky shit-stain and that's all there is to it. Now shut-up." So what I like her ass, I'm an ass man. That's my business.The crew knew better than to push when their Boss began shoveling food in his mouth to avoid conversation. Dinner was a quiet affair once more.----------------------The men's quarters were split into two large rooms with some members having private cabins. The guys, minus their captain and first-mate huddled up in the larger room."I thought Boss was crazy for liking a woman who he hasn't seen properly. But I get it now," Boogie nodded, grabbing a tankard."The way she talks to him," Forte snickered, enjoying the show those two put on."Jesus fucking Christ," stammered Disc J."That soft feminine voice," Heat whispered, reaching for a bottle of rum."The innuendo," Thrill said with wide eyes."The teasing tone," nodded Pomp."I know at first I enjoyed him getting the shaft. Every time we dock he gets his pick of pretty girlies," Jaguar grumbled."Fuck even men hit on him," Wire snorted, sipping at his ale."It's unfair," bemoaned Alt, cupping his face with his palm and sipping sullenly out of an appletini."It's ridiculous," UK grumbled, leaning back in his chair."It's maddening," Snare whined, folding his arms across his muscular chest."But now, I feel pretty bad. She's the devil," giggled Papas, slurping down a margarita."You think she's doing it on purpose?" Gig asked.Bubblegum shook his head. "No, that's what makes it so heinous. This is nothing to her. Just some light banter and sass when he annoys her. But while she considers it innocent, I can see how it would unravel the Boss.""She really gets under his skin. I wouldn't be able to handle Jam talking to me like that," stuttered Skillet."You hear the way she said Captain," Compo asked, wiggling his eyebrows for emphasis. That woman's naughty."Sounded seductive," Moai answered with a flush."It's that accent she tries to hide. Its sounds like a purr," said Jaguar, his keen hearing having picked up on it."Image if she tried to flirt?" Thrill pondered."It'd be the end of our leader," Boogie exclaimed, ever a drama queen."It's not just her accent. It's the way she speaks. Confidently. Likes she's in control," Pomp explained, having firsthand experience of how bossy she could be. When she was teaching Quincy and I those pharmaceutical formulas, I was hot for teacher."She's quick with her comebacks too. It's sexy," Reck replied, savoring his Merlot."I would pay a woman to talk to me like that and step on me," Mosh admitted with no shame.Several turned to stare at their large crewmember, while a few murmured in concurrence. "What?! You know it be hot at fuck. I mean with another woman, not that cackling mad midget. She kinda scares me," the big guy confessed."Yeah the crazy part keeps me away. And she's way too dangerous. But to Kid, that's a plus," Wire agreed."So how big you think her tits are?" Jaguar posed, chugging down his beer. Definitely larger than Dive's little bits."D cup," Heat automatically answered. At the wide eyes stares, the man received, he quickly clarified, "She hugged me."Bubblegum wolf-whistled. "Didn't know you had it in you. You sly dog, Heat," he said patting his friend on his back with a cheeky grin.The blue-haired man sported red rosy cheeks. "We'll see how you handle it when she suddenly hugs you," he grumbled.Pomp rested his chin in his hand. "We knew she has a nice rump, so this completes the set," he mused. Woman nearly knocked me over with that ass in the infirmary the other day."Told you I was right when I said she was curvy," bragged Snare."Well you're gay. It's hard to take your opinion on a woman's body seriously," snorted Papas rolling his eyes for good measure.Snare bristled, narrowing his eyes. "I have two sisters, numb-nuts! And I love clothing and fashion, making up my own patterns; I know a woman's body well. Fuck I've probably seen more naked ladies than you!" he shouted, popping the other man over his head.Papas hopped right back up, glaring at taller man. "Yeah right, I'm a chick magnet!""Oh you're a magnet alright. Repel!" Alt snickered.The group of men broke out into a chorus of raucous laughter."Kid's played wingman for all of us. We need to return the favor," stated UK, hands going to his hips."But how? What does a woman like Jam even like?" Thrill wondered."She likes soft bread rolls, hot soups, roast chicken, and spicy things," Moai listed off, having watched her load up her plate."Idiot. Kid can't cook. He'd burn the kitchen down," Disk J grumbled. And Killer would be after us for giving him the idea."No but food puts everyone in a good mood. A better more receptive mood," Mosh reasoned."That's probably not good enough," said Gig sullenly. How the fuck does one impress a scientist? I don't envy boss."Something tells me flowers and chocolates won't work either," Reck replied. Maybe a nice bottle of wine...loosen her inhibitions."Actually the Professor likes candy and sweets," Skillet answered, thinking of all the treats she pilfered during the day."The flowers though. Can't see her going for a bouquet," thought Heat."A bouquet severed of marine heads maybe," Forte snorted.Boogie broke out into a grin. "Kid would probably prefer that. Imagine him going to the flower shop."They all began chuckling."Well what else does she like?"They spent the night brainstorming and laughing at ridiculous things they believed a scientist may want. They even made a drinking game out of it with a person having to take a shot when they had no idea or a bad idea.------------------------The guys aren't sexually interested in Jam. They are seeing it from Kid's point of view. They all have different tastes but they can acknowledge her attractiveness.Jam hates any type of work that isn't science. Even though inventing things and later manufacturing those items is work she doesn't view it in that manner. She is also manipulative and feels the need to make herself useful.Vegapunk studies DNA (lineage factors) so Jam can as well. And the microscope was first invented in a rudimentary form in 1590 and then in 1666 a more modern concept was derived so it's highly possible they have basic microscopes in One Piece. How else would Vegapunk study DNA? I swear I've seen one in a panel before.Urogue is a monk, we saw nuns at Whiskey Peak, several characters sport crosses, Kuma has a bible and Enel refers to himself as god...somehow religion survived the void century. All that lost tech but they keep religion. Jesus fucking Christ!
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The next morning, the ship's occupants got up as if yesterday hadn't occurred. There were less tired people now that no one had to watch the professor. Jam came in for an early breakfast having gone to bed much earlier than usual. Skillet rushed to put a plate in front of his namaka, eager to erase any bad blood."You don't have to serve me food. I let it go and that's that. The only one I may torment is Captain Asshat," Jam said calmly, sipping at some juice. Didn't even have to make a fuss and these bozos are catering to me."What about the thief?" Hop asked, serving herself some tea and oatmeal. Hip said she was innocent, but I still worry. She's been pining for the boss since we were little.Jam's lips curled in distaste. "While I would like to understand what that cocksucker was thinking, it's a moot point. Besides they can answer to the captain as to why they stole from him. He can handle their insubordination," she waved off their concerns.Good she's learning how things work round here. Only Kid gets to dole out punishments. "We will be landing around two in the afternoon according to Reck's estimates. Everyone will be preparing to dock. Your job will be to scout out information with Dive and the others. I don't know how you need to prep, but be ready on deck by a quarter till," Wire commanded, walking over to the coffee pot. Yesterday's debacle warrants something fancier than usual."Hm, alright. Thanks for heads up." She dug into her breakfast, chewing quietly for several minutes.Skillet was antsy, pivoting from foot to foot, wondering how to begin the conversation. I gave her food like I do with the Captain. I should be safe to broach the issue, right? "Um, we had some questions, if you don't mind. When you're in the jelly form---"She held up a hand, already pretty sure she knew what they wished to know. "I can hear and I can see. No mouth though, so no talking. Most bodily functions are non-existent to make me super efficient. I heal at an accelerated rate and require very little in terms of sustenance," she explained, glancing around the room finding all eyes on her. Now for the awkward part. "Yes I am naked. Clothes don't really stay on a formless shape. But no part of my body corresponds to a particular part. So no you are never going to touch somewhere naughty or whatever you're so worried about. Everything feels the same, think of me as a single celled organism," the professor finished, noticing pink cheeks on several members. She smirked before continuing. "I can expand myself as large as I need with the addition of water and I can also breathe underwater. Why? Someone tried to drown me once. And on the sea it's a really nifty ability to have. It's how I escape if fleeing is the best option. But I still require air in some form. Anything else?" the scientist huffed, eager to return to eating. This waffle is to die for."How big can you get?" Dive asked, her mouth full of waffle and syrup. I'd love to be able to get bigger."What I did yesterday was the largest I can get for now. As I experiment with my abilities, I've been able to do more.""Have you sunken a ship before?" Compo wondered, thinking of how she threatened them yesterday."That is my usual MO. Yes."Forte side-eyed the small woman. "And you just have to morph into the Kraken to do so?" How pretentious."It funny. Some sailors actually believe I'm the real deal. Sometimes I like to fuck with people," Jam giggled, reaching for the coffee pot. It smells heavenly."Sometimes?" House chastised.A cheeky grin met the blue haired woman's accusation."You're not still mad are you?" Moai asked, sitting down with a large plate of mainly sausage, bacon, and ham.The professor sighed, "I am more annoyed than anything. It's distasteful to spy on someone." Several people bowed their heads in shame. "You can thank House for my leniency.""Is there anything we can do?" Disc J queried.Suckers. "After you do whatever tasks that are required of you, I could use some help gathering materials.""We saw that gigantic list. The boss has Bubblegum organizing it and doing the math behind purchases. Heat will assign a few guys to help you gather stuff and distribute the workload," Reck answered, plating himself some fresh fruit and eggs.Jam hummed thoughtfully. "That's a very well thought-out plan." Huh, didn't have to cajole them into helping me. Guess House was being honest when she said they work together."Well he's not called the Captain for nothing. Boss was a gang leader before he was a pirate. He had to be organized to keep us afloat," Dive said proudly."That's cool. I'll be giving Bubblegum more loot money though." At their slack jawed expressions, the small woman giggled. "You didn't honestly think I gave the captain all the treasure I found? Please I gave myself a nice cut in addition to the funds I already had stashed away.""How do you have so much money? You steal from everyone you come across or something?" Joplin asked, suspicion lacing her tone.Brown orbs narrowed at the rude accusation. Sarcastically the Professor hissed, "Generally I don't take from civilians. But I make it a point to rob the marines even when I'm not hurting for cash. Common targets include rich assholes, banks, and anyone that gives me trouble. And I'm really good at finding treasure while I'm looking for other materials. Money's never been an issue.""Must be nice," Reck muttered, lamenting all the expensive things he couldn't afford."Honestly I steal damn near everything---robbing the marines is for funsies."Faces were aghast. This bitch was absolutely bonkers. "For funsies?" whispered House in disbelief."Yeah like yesterday I was trying to rile fire crotch up so I had an excuse to launch him into the ocean. I was going fish him right back out, just thought he needed to cool off," she chortled, her shoulders shaking in mirth.Mouths dropped to the floor. House grabbed the newspaper they set aside for Killer and hit her friend over the head, "Bad Professor. No purposefully pissing off the Boss.""Why not? He needs it. The sign of a good leader is one who can laugh at himself, not become Mr. Prissy Pants ready to throw down at every perceived slight. And I'm only giving him back what he flings my way," Jam grumbled, shooting her friend a pointed glare, batting the paper away."Please don't irritate him for your entertainment. We may poke at him here and there but no one pushes his buttons the way you do," Heat pleaded, disinclined to continue the fighting from yesterday. Master Kid is the best smack talker on the ship. So when we fight, he wins by a mile. Jam unfortunately is a smart-ass..."He starts it," she muttered, stabbing at her breakfast.000000000000000000Kid awoke to the sticky tale-tell signs of a wet dream once more. While it was annoying to have to change boxers so much, Pomp enthusiastically informed him that regular self love did wonders for his health and mood. The ruffian's ears burned scarlet. Last night's dream was dreadfully vivid.The Professor's lab coat had been shortened to right above her knees, those ugly boots nowhere to be seen, her toned caramel legs tantalizing him. And the highlight of his fantasy, her freshly done toes. She stood on top of his bed, pushing him down to make him kneel before her. "Till I'm satisfied," was all Jam uttered, her teasing smirk sending him into overdrive. She began mocking him, telling him to do better and shut her up, like he boasted he could. "I won't call you Captain till you earn it." The dream flashed and he was on top of her, plowing her into his mattress with wild abandon...Washing up, Kid got dressed for the day, keen on exploring the island they were close to. He smelled coffee, the good stuff. Wire must of made some from his personal stash.000000000000000000Bubblegum spent about an hour with Jam going over her list and telling her who was best suited to gather what kind of item. The scientist was suspicious of how accommodating the pirates were being. He took notice of her hesitancy and clarified how the crew operated. "Well we benefit from these medicines and whatnot. Personally I'd love a non-itchy bandage. I look like some dirty sea mutt scratching like that. So yeah, we'll help gather up supplies. By the way, talk to Boogie about your vials and containers. His glasswork is amazing and its durability beats anything you find at the shops.""And he's just going to carter my whims?"The spiky haired man rolled his eyes. "You're a pirate. We barter and trade for things. See what he wants. Knowing Boogie it's something dumb."Bubblegum went on to explain who to bother for what, filling the scientist in on what each crew member could make.Jam was ecstatic. He's collected a crew of artists! It makes sense. He builds things; ergo his ego likes people that also build things. Either that or they endeavored to be useful and found a niche. I'd imagine its gets boring out at sea.000000000000000000It was about one fifteen in the afternoon when UK called down from the crow's nest to say he spotted land. The bell atop the lookout was rung twice, alerting the crew to his findings.Doing some mental calculations, Jam assessed their scope's capabilities. Not a bad range, but improvements are possible. Plus those marines basically snuck up on us. A bigger lens, more mirrors and I could substantially lengthen the viewable distance of their looking glass. I'll add that to my notebook.Spotting Boogie nearby, she headed for the tall man who was talking to Snare about what he wanted to do when they made landfall. When the professor just appeared beside him, he freaked out, jumping back. "Hey there you spooky little shit!" Realizing his mistake, he quickly apologized. "Sorry you just appeared and fucking Dive does that shit to me all the time." How do midgets do that? Fucking evil ass short-shits.Jam pouted and crossed her arms across her chest. "I'll let the height remark slide. I need you to make me all kinds of glass containers. Flasks, decanters, beakers, and vials. Bubblegum praised your glasswork, calling it superior to what the shops have."The emotional man puffed up, thoroughly enjoying the compliments. "I'll need some money for materials but yeah I love making stuff.""But what do you want?" she demanded, tapping her foot impatiently.He stopped to think if there was anything in particular he desired. "Pale pink dye," he voiced after several minutes. "I can find things in my size but rarely in the color I like. Got this nice pair of shorts I want to wear on hotter days but they're white," he spat. And solid white gets dirty so fast out at sea."That's it?" the woman questioned, puzzled. Bubblegum said it would be a stupid request..."Good dye is hard to find and I don't know shit about chemicals," the seafoam-green haired man shrugged."Alright," the tiny scientist nodded, thinking of what materials she would require.Snare cocked an eyebrow, knowing Boogie was too stupid to negotiate properly. "Hey now. Maybe a few more colors for all his hard work."Jam sighed. After a few minutes of haggling they decided on six colors with Snare promising to alter any clothing Jam wanted. "I always require things hemmed. I'll try and make your chosen six colors but it all depends on what's available."The two men high-fived, pleased with themselves. Idiots. Dye takes no effort at all to make.000000000000000000The island they reached was hot tropical summer island. It was muggy. Kid scoffed, removing his beloved coat, feeling like he was cooking in his own sweat. House was going around offering sunscreen to everyone. He hated that greasy crap but he despised peeling even more. House giggled, Thank god he wears a shirt now. All I need to get is his neck and arms. He can get his face and front. If only the shirt he choose buttoned all the way.Safely docking, his crew followed his protocol for a potentially unfriendly island. As this was a larger island, with noticeable powerful signatures nearby, precautions had to be taken. Whoever they belonged to were no match for the Captain, but they could seriously fuck up several of his namaka. Killer advised due diligence.Emma took Papas, Dive, Snare, Reck, UK, and the Professor to information grab.Moai, Bubblegum, Whitney, Forte, Hop, Gig, and Thrill were hitting up the shops for the supplies they had immediate need of and were instructed to check out exactly what the island had to offer in terms of resources and amenities.He'd be with Killer, Wire, Pomp, Jaguar, Hip, Alt, Quincy, Clash, Mosh, and Boogie stopping at the local tavern, determining what kind of welcome they could expect.Heat was staying on ship as the senior guard along with Joplin, House, Skillet, Disk J, and Compo."You've got you orders. Fan out," barked the deep baritone of their leader.000000000000000000The scout team made it back to in a few hours, laden with the fruits of their labor. Emma handled reporting to Heat while Clash took notes to present to the Captain when he returned.The island was named Hofuna, famous for its fresh fruits and tropical weather. There were plenty of shops present as this was a much larger island than the previous one. A small marine base was situated in the middle of town, a pretentious gleaming building of white."That base is far too small for an island this size," UK commented suspiciously, taking a hit from a joint, having found a nice 'herbal' shop on the island. "Not enough pea brains to defend the place if some rowdy pirates attack," he snickered, unable to stop himself. After all the stress these fuckers give me, I needed this."Usually when it's small like that it has several underground levels or tunnels leading elsewhere. A base that size wouldn't have the capacity to be useful to docking ships. Since this island is primarily used for farming, perhaps they didn't want to take up too much land," hypothesized Jam while glaring at the outpost. We should attack now before they have a chance to do anything."The locals say the jungle is haunted," Dive sang out, reaching for UK's joint, only for her hand to be slapped away. The two glared at each other."Then I wouldn't be surprised if the government spread rumors of the jungle being hunted to keep people out of it. They're up to something," the professor concluded, hopping on a barrel."You sure you can handle this shorty?" the potbellied man smirked at the bubble-haired blonde.Dive snatched the joint and took a puff before passing it back. "Fuck off," she hissed, coughing, making her taller friend laugh heartily. Jam wrinkled her nose, not liking the smell."You want a hit?" UK offered, wondering how giggly the smart woman would get. Bet she'd be fun high."I don't smoke. Bad smells get to me," she quickly retorted, not paying any mind to the way her crew's eye lit up.Papas grabbed the joint in her stead, ready to relax for a bit. "This shit is good. We need to stock up before we leave.""What about an edible?" Heat said, leaning against the railing, taking a long drag."Never had one so I couldn't say." Being incapacitated is dangerous for someone like me..."Skillet could turn this shit into the best brownies," Emma giggled. Little innocent nerd has never gotten high. We'll fix that."Hm, maybe then," Jam replied, unaware that the pirates were as devious as she was.000000000000000000The supply crew made it back soon afterwards, busy hauling up the purchased items. Heat ordered everyone present to assist them in putting away the goods.Bubblegum grabbed the professor, "This is some of the stuff you wanted for the freezer, as well as some odds and ends we found on sale. The boss is eager to begin building. You take it down to your lab or his workshop. I don't know where this crap goes." Mad Scientist or not, I am in charge of budgeting and supplies."Thanks," she hummed pleasantly, eagerly investigating the purchased items. Piping, base chemicals for refrigerant, metal components, some things for that glue, several plants to dry out...Yay! And I didn't have to do this all by myself.The tall skinny man watched the woman out of the corner of his eye as he gave out orders to other members. The little woman was doing exactly as he instructed to his amazement. He didn't even have to pull rank. Jam's fine being ordered about as smart as she is. She might get a little sassy but she's just playing. Long as you're not rude or mean, shorty's fine... Reactive. That's the word I'm looking for. If we're nice, she'll be nice. Now how am I going to beat that idea into the Boss's mind?000000000000000000The marines were in a tizzy. The island did little in the way to attract attention, so few big names ever stopped by. It was a little tropical farming community, nothing special. And those brave enough to face the cursed jungle were soon disposed of. The navy couldn't afford to let the pirates get a hold of what they were guarding.Eustass 'Captain' Kid was a violent psychopath, a criminal of the worst caliber. He and his fellow Worse Generation members were monsters, undeserving of anything more than a bullet to the brain. But Captain Kid was powerful and those currently stationed at the base were not of the caliber of strength necessary to fight such a beast.HQ authorized the usage of the latest technology to assist in their endeavors. Utilizing a hologram machine that Dr. Vegapunk built, all sorts of scary apparitions and haunted noises emitted from the deep foliage. It kept the locals frightened and out of the way. And all the other things in the jungle right where they belonged. Pirates and other intruders often fell victim to hidden traps, while a network of Den-Den Mushi cameras allowed the marines to see how best to ambush the few that made it past all the tricks.The commander figured it would take a few days for the rowdy pirates to get interested in the rumors about the island. Young, cocky shitheads like the Kid Pirates won't be able to pass up the opportunity.000000000000000000Not everyone on duty was amenable to this plan. The idea of letting some vicious pirate run amok was horrifying. Who knows what he and his band of miscreants might do if left unchecked. This wasn't justice. And there wasn't any chance Captain Kid came here in peace. Not with his track record...Keeping to the shadows Ensign Niwatori got into position of the roof on a nearby shop. The obnoxious redheaded brute was easy enough to spot, his gaudy maroon coating giving him away. The ugly fucker's so big, no way I'll miss.Pulling the trigger, his aim held true, only for his bullet to be stopped by a long trident slicing through the air. His shot was deflected. Shit, the brave man thought, readying his gun for a second time and hoping the stupid pirates didn't realize where the shot was fired from.Before he could blink, the whirling of spinning blades, honestly it sounded like they were laughing, descended on the young man, striking him fatally in the back. Turning to the left, the last thing he saw was a mane of golden hair and a glossy blue and white striped mask.Killer let the body slide off his punishers, a disgusting plopping sound occurring before the body hit the roof. The blonde landed gracefully back on the street, the stares of passerby's having no effect on the hardened assassin."Who the fuck was that Killa?" Kid grumbled, angry that his day had been interrupted."Nothing more than an annoying bug," the second in command said, resheathing his blades."With the warm welcome he gave us, maybe we should go say hi," Wire looked off in to the distance towards the base, his deadpan stare intimidating to anyone who didn't know him well.Kid chuckled darkly, "After we enjoy the sights. This place is huge, a tropical paradise. We'd be rude guests if we didn't appreciate all this island has to offer." His smirk grew larger when he saw some people duck into buildings. Run you cowards. Scurry off to the safety of your sad little hovels.000000000000000000After Killer's casual murder of a soldier the people were more cautious, keeping out of the way of their visitors. However, a few told the pirates of the strange happenings in the jungle."The spirits of the dammed are lost in that place. No one has ever come back alive," warned one old man, sitting outside with his paper. The redhead smirked, liking how brave the geezer was to address his crew directly.Kid took these rumors as a challenge. "We should investigate this haunted jungle, see what's up." Bet its nothing but some old superstitions.His men cheered, eager to do something exciting after two weeks at sea. Killer shook his head, his sharp blue eyes zeroing in on the lush tropical forest. Something about it bothered the skilled combatant. "We need to return to the ship and make plans with everyone. Heat would be devastated it we explored without him.""And we have to see what the scouts found out," Alt added, not really fancying going anywhere haunted. I don't do ghosts.Deep red lips thinned out, their owner slightly annoyed, "Yeah. Yeah. Alright back to the Punk!"000000000000000000A friend asked why I liked Bubblegum so much. In Wano he, UK, and Pomp go out of their way to find Killer and support him. After the blonde's fight with Hawkins they carry him gently out of the fire as best they can. And when Jinbe and Raizo unleash water to douse the flames, Bubblegum holds Killer (who can no longer swim), preventing him from washing away, all by himself. This implies they were carrying the big guy that way in order to be considerate of his wounds. Apparently as skinny as Bubblegum's arms are, he can hold Killer up all by himself even with rushing water coming at them. Dude's pretty strong. Plus the way he dresses is cool.Killer is the Strawhat equivalent to Zoro but his crew respects him far more. Sanji wrapped Zoro up like a ham...a ham! Franky carries him over his shoulder at the middle with his head down, which is one of the worse ways to carry an injured person. The Kid Pirates hold Killer above their heads, away from the fire, one person at his head and one at his feet to keep him level. They're smarter.The Strawhats seem to do things solo, splintering off and doing their own thing. I don't think that's how the Kid Pirates operate. They work together, tackling problems with one another, which should translate to being more successful overall. But they're not the MC crew so...it's not fair! Luffy feels like Blackbeard sometimes. All of the BB pirates do their own thing too and I'm wondering why Oda is presenting that motif. Also my friend gave a drawing of Whitney which I added to Chapter 4.
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Kid and his band of misanthropes were back on the Punk investigating UK's stash and the other purchases made. Bubblegum informed him that the shrimp was occupied working on the freezer. Hearing this, Killer dashed ahead, wanting to be directly involved with anything to do with his domicile. Kid snorted, following his shaggy haired friend. This fuckhead can't wait to see his damn freezer.The two found the gremlin in a large previously unused room that sat behind the kitchen's main dry storage area. The walls were covered with insulation and tubing for refrigerant. Wires snaked their way all across the room. Jam had a glass bottle with a pressure gage in her hand filling up the tubes. She twisted herself to face them with a grin. "The bones of this are almost done. You'll need to coat the walls with the steel we talked about, Captain."Kid let out an appreciative whistle. Killer was moving with barely contained excitement. The room Kid chose was huge; they would be able to store food the way he always dreamed of, in excess. The blueprints on the floor were amazing. "How long till you two are done?""After he covers up the tubing and wiring, we will add the shelves and hooks. Then we need to connect this to backup power supply and after a few hours of cooling you can fill this bitch up."Killer held in tight his inner squeals of delight. I should do something nice back. She likes to eat... Clearing his throat, he belted out, "After we stock up on things, you can make dinner requests from time to time." Kid raised a non-existent brow, knowing how rare it was for Killer to offer such a privilege.Without warning, the small woman latched onto him, hugging him around the middle. An almost squeaky grunt hissed past Killer's lips, the man himself bright red from embarrassment, his body locked awkwardly in place. Jam is much stronger than she looks. Fuck her tits are everywhere. That coat does nothing to hide 'em. I owe the red jackass an apology. This is torture...Kid's grin overtook his face, deep booming laughter escaping his mouth. "Reds a good color on you Killa," the younger man teased. Ha! I knew that fucker would die when the little witch hugged him."Um, hugs are nice, but not very pirate like," the second in command stuttered out. He glimpsed Kid's bright cheeky smile taunting him, earning his leader the bird. The redhead smiled wider."Just like I told Kid, a pirate does what they want. Quit being so melodramatic," she berated, letting the tall man go. It's just a hug. Why are all these guys weirdo's?000000000000Emma was relaxing in the crow's nest, contemplating something. Her boss deserved the best of the best. On the other hand, watching him flounder so badly was entertaining. Still he could use some help. And we could all do with a laugh. The professor liked to fuck with Kid. But can she handle being fucked with back? Mind made up, the ship's pervert snickered to herself, strolling casually into the kitchen. There she saw Skillet, dutifully cleaning out the kitchen and preparing for the addition of new supplies. "Skillet, I need a favor."The green haired man looked up, wearing a white bandana and cleaning gloves, working hard tidying the kitchen. "I'm busy at the moment. Killer will throw a hissy fit if I'm not done by the time he gets back."The woman pinched her fingers together and smiled. "It's a small ask. Just something for a silly itty bitty joke. I want you to make vanilla éclairs tonight. But make a single one extra large and absolutely stuffed with cream and set it aside for me.""That's it?" the pastry chef asked, not particularly minding the dessert request. Everyone loves my éclairs.The blonde nodded, with a Cheshire cat smile. "Hip, Hop, and I will clean the kitchen for you tonight as payment," she assured figuring she could get the other ladies to help her."Alrighty then. I'll need you to get me some heavy cream though. I'm sorta stuck here," he smiled awkwardly."No problem. Thanks."000000000000Dinner progressed as normally, loud talking and messy eating all around. As usual Jam sat with Dive, the smaller woman animatedly telling her friend about the coconut grove she found. Kid was busy inhaling his food, talking loudly with some of the guys, only occasionally glancing at the petite professor. When Emma noticed the scientist was almost finished with her meal, she slid in next to her. "Hey Jam, I want you to try this delicious éclair."The little woman turned her head and immediately after she opened her mouth to speak, a large pastry was roughly shoved inside. White vanilla cream shot down her throat and dribbled past her lips, making a mess of her face and coat. The unsuspecting woman gagged and swallowed the treat, her eyes watering over the flakey pastry choking her airway. Afterwards she coughed a bit, reaching up and using her sleeve to wipe at her face. "What the hell was that for? Eugh, that hurt," Jam complained, gingerly massaging her throat. She reached for a napkin and began wiping her coat off.Mouths were left aghast at their naughty crewmate. A giggle escaped someone and soon quiet snickers and chortle followed. Kid was struggling. Emma you bastard. On one hand this was funny as fuck, his black lips twisting into a maniacal grin. The redhead always appreciated a well executed prank. On the other hand, it was kinda hot, he thought shifting slightly. Looked like a giant cock came in her mouth. Fuck, tiny engulfed that huge thing whole. The big brute's face reddened, his mind plunging into the gutter.Emma dramatically placed her hand over her heart, hamming it up. "Le sigh, tis painful but my eyes don't deceive me. You my dear are a dick-sucking extraordinaire. Took that extra large fatty like a champ you did. And I was hoping you batted for my team," she finished with a flourish, holding the smaller woman delicately by the chin. Let's see how mad you get.Jam didn't embarrass easily, but she was mortified. The silence that lasted after her crewmembers quip was deafening. Jam's hands clenched at her sides, getting ready to pummel the other woman. Didn't these clowns learn from yesterday not to fuck with me?!Bubblegum reached out, placing a steadying hand on her shoulder, his face red as a tomato. Fuckin hell Emma! Stop teasing the captain! And for the love of Christ, don't piss off the gremlin.Kid gulped, his Adam's apple bobbing slowly. He couldn't tear his eyes from the scientist.Noticing the captain watching, Jam scoffed, misinterpreting his interest. Great and now I can't rip her a new one or the brute will flip out. Jam exhaled deeply, her nostrils flaring. I can't hurt her---it's just like back home. I'm going to pretend she's one of my stupid brothers and get her back accordingly. The professor took a deep calming breath, before stretching out a gelatinous arm and pulling the dumbass into a headlock. Using her other arm she snatched Heat's bottle of hot sauce and pinched Emma's nose, forcing the skinny woman's mouth open, ramming the aforementioned sauce down her gullet. "Enjoy," she purred, a gloating smile emerging as her victim was made to chug half the bottle. Jam held her tight, unwilling to let the pervert go and drink something to soothe her burning mouth. "Suffer you ass-clown." The taller woman flailed helplessly, begging to be released until the smaller woman sighed, "You're never going to fuck with me again like that are you?""No!" Dear god, how strong is this bitch? I can't get away for shit!Jam smirked, squeezing her victim tighter. "Hmm. Doesn't sound believable. Sounds like you may try again.""Can't take a joke? You can dish em but-" the taller of the two wheezed out, only to be interrupted by a snort.The professor rolled her eyes. "Quit being a baby. What I'm doing back to you is child's play in comparison to what I could do. You choked me with that damn éclair. Can't you handle a little joke? It's just some hot sauce," the scientist mocked. The practical jokester gasped in pain, her mouth burning so bad it brought tears to her eyes."Eww, you're getting snot on me, you sniveling infant," Jam frowned, releasing the troublemaker, who made a mad dash for a glass of water. Jam smiled and waited till Emma chugged the whole thing. Cheekily, the small woman gloated, "You are aware that water only swishes around the capsaicin, the chemical component of a pepper that produces its hotness, making your mouth feel the burn all over again, right?"Screeching in agony once more, the poor prankster shook her head and glared back the scientist."It's not my fault you're an idiot. Milk will help," the gremlin giggled, shrugging her shoulders.The tall woman ran to fridge, chugging straight out of the carton, her namaka laughing at her expense. Kid smirked, glad that the professor didn't go overboard.000000000000After that Jam had lost her appetite. She stomped down to her lab and took her aggression out on powdering some herbs. After a few minutes of muttering revenge ideas aloud, her door was flung open."You upset at Emma?" Dive sang. Emma is such a cunt. She's funny though.Jam took a long inhale, unproductively attempting to calm down. "No, I want to be best friends with that perverted asswipe.""We play jokes on each other. It means you're one of us," the blonde giggled, hopping up on a workbench."Yay me," she replied listlessly, getting frustrated at how long it was taking to grind the plants down. "Look just get out, I'm not really up for this right now," she hissed, messaging her temples with her free hand.Dive's eyes widened. She's really angry. "Emma was just curious. She gets like that.""Curiosity will kill that pussy licking whore," the professor cackled, slamming her first down hard on the tabletop.Uh-oh. Need to calm her down. "It was just a little joke. You don't need to be so dramatic," the younger woman assured."But I am dramatic. If Emma's allowed to be perverted than why can't I be dramatic?""Well I mean you are smarter. Be the bigger person.""Dive woman like you and me will never be the bigger person."The blonde snickered, reaching out and patting the professor on the back. It did the trick, soothing the brown eyed woman enough to continue. She put her materials down with a sigh. "Emma didn't do that to figure out my sexuality. An action so stupid tells her nothing other than I have a big mouth. No, right as she shoved that damn pastry down my throat, she took a glance over my shoulder and then tilted my neck so that I'd face a particular direction. Had I not been so preoccupied with glaring at her I would have seen who she was signaling to watch. Whom exactly, I don't know. But this shit was preplanned. Skillet is a wonderful pastry chef, all of those éclairs should have been equal in size. Mine was larger and over filled with cream.""Why would she do that?" the blonde asked, her legs swinging wildly, displaying her eagerness at this juicy gossip.Jam sighed, leaning back in her chair. "By the malicious glee in Emma's face, I'd say there's some shithead who enjoyed me choking on that phallic shaped pastry."Dive blushed and thought hard, the pieces of the puzzle falling into place. Emma either did it to mess with Hip and Joplin or to tease the captain. Boss probably liked that way too much. He wasn't the only one though. The whole room was flustered.Coffee colored eyes narrowed in suspicion. "You know something, don't you?""No!" Dive shouted, shaking her head, and clamping her mouth shut tight.Jam huffed, knowing a clear lie when she heard one. "Tell you what, I'm too sober for this shit. Get me a rum and coke.""And some munchies?" the part fish-woman asked, with a bright smile."You know it. I left dinner in a rush."000000000000Dive returned around twenty minutes later with the drinks and snacks. After a few minutes of silence, the Professor sighed. "Dive I grew up in a large family. And if it's one thing I'm very familiar with its catty women and their fucking mind games."The blonde's eyes widened. "But you said you had seven brothers!""And I also have a mother, aunts, cousins, and grandmothers.""Your whole family is alive and you know them?!" Dive shrieked."If I wanted I could hop on a Den-Den Mushi and call them right now. I won't, for reasons, but I could.""Then why are you here and not home?""Science. Boredom. General apathy. I'm kind of a cunt," she replied flippantly. There are more reasons but you don't need to know all that.Dive frowned, her smile disappearing from her face. "People would kill for your luck. Most of us are orphans with no idea where we come from." I have no memory of my family..."Life has never been fair. It is what it is."The room went silent. This bitch has family. Living breathing family. Practically unheard of in this world. How could she just leave that? Maybe there were problems... "So are you like the black sheep?"The scientist shook her head. "No. They love me." At Dive's baffled expression, she elaborated, "I mean I'm more of a cow than a sheep but I still belong.""A cow?" the blonde asked with a raised brow."Cow's are really smart and they're super cute. Sheep go with the flow, are stupid, and annoying, just like my family members," the professor grumbled, taking a long swig from her rum and coke. "Dive I was well cared for. I didn't run away, I left with assistance from my family. They funded my initial scientific career," she said softly, placing her hand behind her neck and squeezing. "But we're sidetracking. The reason I'm so pissed is because I don't need that kind of drama. I don't know Emma's precise intent; however I am positive she's seeking to cause chaos."Jam took a sip from her drink and sighed heavily, "Look let's pretend there exists some weirdo who finds me attractive. Say we start something. If it goes wrong, who gets the boot? The crewmember that's been here for years or the newbie? Her little game risks my position. I love being able to sleep at night and not have to do everything fucking thing for myself. Why do you think I forgave Captain twat waffle and stayed? Being here gives me way more time to invent than before. I'm not jeopardizing that for shit."The biter smiled as she snacked. "Relax, it's just Emma being her usual perverted self. And why would being interested in you make them weird? You're awesome." So that's why she was pissy."You're saying that because you like me and you want that glue," Jam griped, reaching out to pinch her friend's cheek, making Dive pout. "But seriously, how the hell have I attracted the attention of anyone? To the best of recollection I've done jack-shit that could be seen as sexy. Fuck, you guys call me a potato gremlin. So what this mystery man, and I'm assuming man because Emma happily called me a dick sucker, likes me for what reason exactly?"Dive smiled, waving her arms enthusiastically. "You're funny, really smart, and talented. Power's hot too."Professor Inator pursed her lips. "Those are vague superficial reasons. And no one's tried to flirt with me save Pomp, and he does it to everyone for a laugh."Dive shrugged, not wanting to reveal how much she knew. "Maybe he's shy. Might of told Emma how he felt and she made a spectacle of it. Emma's a dick like that.""She's a right bitch," the scientist pouted."So how are you going to respond? Wear something sexy and see who pays attention?" the blonde leered. Perhaps she'll let me pick out an outfit. I know precisely what gets the boss going."Please with this weirdo, I could probably get away with showing a bit of ankle off," she said, slowly lifting up her lab coat to show off a small patch of skin.Dive put her hand over her mouth, being theatrical as possible. "You whore," she admonished with glee."I know, right?" Jam snickered back.The pair dissolved into giggles."It's nice to be wanted. You aren't interested in anybody?" Dive asked softly, concerned for her leader. I hope Jam's not completely disinterested in a relationship. I might want to torment the big lug a bit, but I don't want him to suffer."I don't really know anyone that well. I'm a scientist, I analyze and dissect everything. I need all the details to make a decision. A relationship is work, the kind of thing that keeps you busy---I don't bother with romance unless I feel someone's worth it. Anyway, why the interest in my predilections?" At her companions black stare, she elaborated "My sexual preferences."The small, slender woman shrugged. "I don't know. I mean we get bored on the ship sometimes. A lot of us like to gossip. We just wonder...""And what silly conclusions have you come to?" Jam asked smirking. "Tell you what; you manage to guess correctly and I'll admit to whatever it is."Dive animatedly began listing off the crew's theories. "Some of us think you're an unfeeling scientist, so love is beneath your great mind. Um, some say virgin. Like you're too focused on your work for anything else. A few believe maybe you wear that coat twenty-four seven because your deformed from an experiment gone wrong so you don't bother with romance. Or maybe you're really shy..." she trailed off, hoping she didn't piss the other woman off.Jam took a deep breath, high-pitched cackles invading the room's silence. She pulled off her goggles, to wipe at her eyes. "You are wrong on all accounts. Unfeeling? You've seen how over the top my moods go. Shy? Really? With the way I get in people's faces and whatnot? Deformed? Please I am master class scientist, the hell if I make mistakes big enough to deform myself beyond repair. As for virgin, I'm a scientist who loves to experiment. Interpret that information and read between the lines," she finished, her voice shaking with mirth. These idiots are a barrel full of laughs.Dive's blue eyes widened in surprise, popping out of their sockets. I've got to tell everyone they've lost the bet. We need to adjust our guesses. "Oh my god, so you've-""Been there, done that. I'm twenty-three and I left home at fifteen. Do the math," the older woman said airily. Why does that surprise people?"Ooh... So everything?" I can't believe we thought she was some innocent virgin. Oh the uproar this will cause.Jam smiled, the over excitable reactions her friend gave putting her in a better mood. "Well not everything. You have to find a good partner to try stuff with. But I'm well versed to the point where I know what I like and what I don't." Bitch you are ridiculous. I wonder how long it will take you to spread this about the ship. I'm already aware secrets don't keep with this crew..."What about the lab coat?" Dive questioned, eager to learn more about her mysterious companion.The scientist groaned, hating how much attention her ever-present lab coat brought her. "It's a practical necessity. It protects my skin and clothes, its fire proof, it's useful for hiding my tech, medicine, and chemicals, and it reduces damage by forty-two percent. Why would I take it off but to sleep?""Huh. Then why cover your face?" I know there is some juicy reason why; I can smell it."Look I keep my face covered for personal reasons. Killer wears that goofy ass helmet and no one gives him flack. Drop it," Jam hissed, unwilling to go down that road. It was silent save for Professor Inator's huffs. Dive stilled, wisely deciding to let the topic go."Emma could have just asked me about my preferences," said Jam not wanting to scare her friend off."And you'd have answered?""I would have, prior to this shit. Now that I think about it and put all the data together, fuck no," Jam crossed her arms making a large no signal."Eh why?" whined the shorter woman."Because Emma's too immature for that kind of knowledge. And before you ask, no to you as well. You'd squeal under pressure. Let's say I admit my predilections, she's the type to tease me, to play matchmaker, or some other dumb shit. No thank-you. I've seen the books you guys read. Those shitty cheesy romance novels that vary from sickeningly sweet to downright vulgar. Yeah I'll keep my distance," snapped the older woman.The bubbly woman sucked in her lip, pouting, "Those are good books. What would you know anyway?""Like I said, been there, done that. Those stupid books are nothing but porn without plot," Jam answered with contempt."They're fantasy books. What's wrong with indulging ourselves sometimes?" wondered Dive, thinking of all the fun and naughty books she finished."Nothing. Just that the information is faulty," the other replied dismissively.Dive sighed into her rum and coke. "I guess. But where are we supposed to get our information from?"The professor sat her chin onto her hands, contemplating. "Well an older woman but with most of you being orphans that was a no-go," she uttered, before gasping in shock. The insight hit her like a brick wall, the pieces of the puzzle falling into place. I'm so stupid, that explains so much. No wonder they're touched starved and socially awkward at times. They were never shown affection in their formative years!"Huh?" the blonde asked, confused as to what made her cremate freeze up.Jam placed a hand over the other's black painted lips. "Shush, I'm thinking." That's why hugs unravel these guys. Kid loses his mind, Heat practically died, and Bubblegum melted. Dive hangs on longer than normal, unwilling to end it and House clams up and pats me awkwardly on my back. Quincy squeaked and Pomp held on for dear life. Killer panicked and turned redder than Kid's hair while Mosh squished the life out of me and Boogie started tearing up! They're all sad little orphans, angry at the world! How the fuck did I miss that? Her eyes glittered with an insatiable gleam."Jam?" Dive muttered, uncomfortable with the expression on her namaka's face.The scientist reached up, grabbing at the other ladies collar, "Tell me is everyone here an orphan?" This is why the captain hangs on me so damn much. That proud fuck-wit won't admit to being affection deprived. This is gold. Oh I know exactly how I'm going to handle him when he's being annoying."Well mostly. Some of us had a parental figure for a minute but they died when we were young. Or they were shitty and barely present. That's how several people joined boss. His gang was a ragtag group of hungry street urchins," the biter stuttered out, self-conscious of the crew's humble origins."Is that why several of his requests have been food related?" asked Jam honestly. God dammit! They keep making me feel bad. How am I supposed to manipulate them if they're this pitiful?"Don't make fun of us!" the little woman screeched.The darker skinned woman removed her goggles, rubbing at her eyes, tiredly. "I'm not. It's just sad. Where I'm from, we don't let kids roam freely like that. It's dangerous. The church takes them in temporarily and then someone in the village formally adopts them; we don't abandon our own. No one, not even the shitty town drunk, would let a child go hungry. It's not a perfect place-there are lots of problems, but no one starves." I'm evil but I'm not ridicule hungry orphans evil...The bubbly blonde set her glass down, hugging herself and tucking her knees to her chest. In a small voice she clarified, "Home was chaotic. The island was run by gangs and you had to join one just to survive. But they didn't treat you well. And food is a great way to control people. It was rough until I joined Kid. He had a base hidden in a scrap yard. Boss ate his fruit when he was only seven and had the townspeople afraid of the red devil child who lived in the dump. I met him when I was eight and he was ten. Killer lead another gang faction in town, but he and Kid were already friends. Boss refused to be his underling so they ran separate groups. He'd come by to talk of his successes and hang out. I think even then Killer knew Kid would be the boss but he was too stubborn to follow someone four years younger," she finished fondly."So that's why they're so close," the scientist murmured to herself."Wait, did you seriously think Killer is his girlfriend?" Dive whispered loudly, her blue eyes wide open in astonishment. Oh my god, those two would die. Killa practically raised Kid."Kinda. Where one is, so the other. That fluffy dork came down to the workshop to deliver Kid food in a white frilly apron, looking like some beefy housewife. And in those reports I read, the marines wrote that he prefers long leggy blondes at the brothels so..."The two broke out into a tipsy giggling fit, unable to contain themselves.000000000000Hip dashed over to the sink, bopping the rooster headed woman upside her skull. "That was awful you pervert! Kid was enthralled by her!"Emma shrugged, rubbing at the lump on her cranium. "Hey I said I'd play a prank on her. I promised it be funny. I did and it was. What the fuck are you bitching about?!"Hip screeched out her frustrations and stomped back to the woman's quarters. She just made it worse! She was supposed to embarrass the professor with Kid laughing at her. No he popped a hard one at the table!Hop stayed, quietly washing the dishes as Emma dried them and put them away. "Did you have to go that far?"Emma's hand dramatically plastered itself across her chest, its owner affronted. "It was hilarious. Did you see Boss? Fuck even some of the guys were shifting in their seats. That was prime entertainment," she defended.Glancing to her side, Emma sighed witnessing Hop's frown. "Look we all know Kid has a little crush on her. Watch them talk and even the blind could see what's going on. He pisses Jam off and that snobby voice she uses vanishes, as the gremlin goes from professional smartypants to badass bitch. Kid loves to joke around but our more sensitive friends can't take it. She flings that shit right back at him. Jam pokes at him and don't act like he doesn't enjoy that. The boss is basically an animal. He wants to fight her, win, and then mount her, probably while biting her or some shit," she joked, a lewd grin taking over her face."He's not that barbaric!" Hop blurted out, blushing heavily.Emma removed her sunglasses, blinking wearily at her cohort. "Are we talking about the same man?" she deadpanned, her mood serious for once. "It's not just that. Oddly enough, the two of them fit. Kid has always been self conscious of himself. He knows he's a big scary brute. The professor is absolutely fearless, crazy enough to fuck with him for fun. I'm surprised none of us connected the dots sooner as to how important that might be to him."The slender prankster sighed, knowing the more she shared, the more she dashed Hop's confidence for a happy ending. "And then there's the science crap. Look you didn't hear the two of them being gross and nerdy in his workshop. They threw abound words like capacitor, diode, Watts, and all kinds of numbers. Jam understands him and he's latched onto that.""Nor really healthy, the taller woman murmured, trying to salvage her sister's happiness."Maybe not, but it's better than trying to like someone who will never know where you're coming from." Emma finished putting up the last of the dishes, pulling the plug on the sink water."I always thought he'd eventually give into one of the girls," Hop fretted sadly."Kid's too brash for that. He needs someone who can call him on his bullshit. Clash had a point, those two can't even tell him no. The boss doesn't want a pushover," the usually playful woman commented, as the two headed for bed.000000000000Kid was in the crow's nest with some of the upper officers in his crew. They were drinking and planning their excursions for tomorrow. This island was large and they never passed up an opportunity to explore. The island's southern side was divided into three areas, residential, commercial shops, and farming. There were so many shops it took Bubblegum ten minutes just to list all the amenities available. The northern half was all jungle, a promising supposedly haunted place. There were rumors of some mysterious cannibal tribe hiding out-that's why no bodies had been discovered. Reck was giving his report on everything, but all could Kid could think about was that damn pastry.A dollop of cream had plopped down to where her tits were. Fuel for tonight's dreams I'm sure. Fuck I'm going to be washing more shitty laundry. He closed his eyes, committing the image to memory."So boss what's our plan?" a voice jostled his musings.Golden orbs flew open, startled out of his daydream. "We should go adventuring in the jungle," he ordered, trying to cover his blunder.Killer shook his head, holding in his laughter. Everyone present knew were their boss's mind was. It was spelled out all across his face. Deciding to just let it go, Reck sighed, "No, it would be better to attack the base first. I'm willing to bet that jungle is laden with traps. It's also the route they expect us to take. Here boss, read the reports."Kid skimmed through the reports, a frown marring his previously happy countenance. "So you're saying these bastards are lying to the people and hiding something in the jungle?" he grumbled out. The more I travel the more fucked up shit I come across."That's what Jam concluded and it is mighty fishy how small that base is. Those fuckers could be hiding a secret specialized training facility, an underground lab, anything really. She says there are most likely tunnels leading elsewhere, deep into the heart of the island," Wire explained, eager to explore.Kid grunted, leaning back in his chair. "With as many marine outposts as tiny's destroyed by Killer's estimates, I'm sure she's right."Murmurs rose in anticipation, everyone placing bets on what the government was hiding, Heat collecting the pot for safekeeping. More grumbling ensured and finally it was decided that they would goof off tomorrow, act chill and whatnot, before hitting up the base in the dead of night."Alright. Rest up and prep for battle. We'll give those scrubs the surprise of their lives and attack at two a.m. tomorrow night," said the redhead with a wicked smile.000000000000I don't think the One Piece world has video porn only written and drawn/pictures/pin-up porn. Now they can do videos but they don't seem to do movies or anything like that. In a world where survival is a big issue, entertainment probably falls short on the priority list.The éclair scene was inspired by me walking in on some coworkers at a bakery seeing who could fit more of the pastry in their mouth without it squirting cream on them...those idiots were wild. I miss them.I never thought I would have to say—well write—this but if someone likes something odd or icky to you, its really not your business. One of the people who dm's me frequently expressed revulsion at another author's fanfic. Now the fanfic in question is morally dubious and poorly written in my opinion; their rendition of a canon character is awful. But that's my own personal opinion; in the grand scheme of things it means jack shit. I would never write a mean comment directly to a person. Their preference does not translate to them being deserving of my ire. My friend was upset that the author wrote Laxus (from Fairytail) as a grapist. Like they couldn't wrap their head around how someone could be a fan but do this to a character they love.People often write in a way to offset a deficiency in their life, their character gaining what they themselves lack. Its personal, intimate even. Most authors tag their fics well; it's not like what you run into is a surprise. The example fic has the character being abducted and then coerced/forced into a sexual relationship. It's dark. Not really my cup of tea but I get why it may be someone else's. Maybe the author wanted to be taken away from the life they live; maybe they've been sex-shamed and having the other party be solely responsible for the explicit kinky sex appeals to them; maybe they've been in a bad relationship and this is getting those feelings out. Maybe it's all of these things or something entirely different but it's not anyone's place to judge. Don't like, don't read- it's a simple adage. I run into stories all the time that portray Kid in a way I can't stand and while I rant sometimes, it's not serious and in no way would I attack someone. Really I just don't like the hate he receives.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The next day, Dive was full of nervous energy, bouncing all over the place. Secret keeping was not her strong suit. But dropping the bombshells I learned last night on everyone right now would distract them from the raid. God dammit! I want to tell everyone! Ohh this is torture!The crew meanwhile took a leisure day out, exploring shops, haggling with vendors, and sampling the town's tropical fare. Several pirates bought new swimsuits and flip flops. Dive liked to make jewelry, getting excited at the large selection of shell style beads and whatnot the tropical island had to offer. She may have gone overboard with her purchases. Oops...The majority of the crew partook in the special herbs available, using their portion of loot money to stockpile it for later. All the fresh fruit was super sweet and juicy, the crew pigging out on chicken and pineapple kebobs from a nearby stall. The sugarcane rum Hofuna was known for tasted divine.Jam put the finishing touches on the deep freezer with Kid directly after breakfast, powering it on and telling Killer he could begin stocking it in two hours. The man gathered up all the cooks and practically dragged them off to market, demanding Bubblegum come with to help budget everything. He ordered Compo to fish up all he could and begin prepping the meat for storage. Kid was busy laughing it up with Heat and Wire, someone coming up with the idea to magnetize giant metal letters spelling out KILLERS MEAT over the large freezer door.The professor and Dive enlisted the help of Alt and Jaguar to go check out that coconut grove. Alt knew exactly how to spot a good coconut, telling them to check if the fruit felt heavy for its size, if they could hear sloshing sounds, meaning it had juice, and to look for three dark spots in the formation of a bowling ball. God I want some nice Piña Colada's. This week has been stressful as hell.Jam was going ask Killer to make everyone coconut shrimp, seeing how Compo had already caught plenty. Ooh delicious coconut shrimp! That fuzzy asshole better honor his offer."Hey Dive, you could put these in your shirt and actually have something," Jaguar teased, holding two coconuts up to her chest and laughing loudly.The small woman growled before launching herself up at her taller companion, biting him hard on the arm. He screamed, "Take a joke you crazy bitch!" while trying to pull her off.Jam snickered loudly, while Alt covered his face with his hands. "He can't leave her alone for shit. Why he keeps antagonizing her is beyond me," the tall slender man muttered."He likes her. I've noticed Jag prefers to aggravate Dive so that she'll hit or bite him. I think he enjoys the attention," the small woman whispered.Alt froze, contemplating the professor's words. True to the scientist conclusions, Jaguar looked awfully pleased with himself as Dive chomped down on his arm, hissing out threats. "Fuck me sideways and call me crazy, you're right," he muttered, astonished he never thought about it before."Of course I am. It's obvious. But don't tell those two, this is way more entertaining," she giggled, getting back to gathering up the fruit. I'll be teasing pigtails later.Alt raised an eyebrow at her words. How can she spot that idiot's interest in Dive and not the Captain's interest in her? This is bananas...00000000 00000000 00000000At a quarter till two Moai, Compo, Whitney, Disc J, and Forte were left to watch the ship with Emma as the senior guard. The rest of everybody was busy sharpening tools, packing up supplies and weapons in anticipation for tonight's battle. A mini transponder snail was given to Quincy, Heat, and Killer to communicate back with the ship, where Forte would be manning the phone, and to each other.From his place atop of the Punk's skull styled bow, the Captain constructed a large flying metal disc, allowing his subordinates to stand atop it with himself. Killer said it would balls to the walls hilarious if they just dropped in; hence Kid went with the sneaky route. The group of twenty five landed on the roof of the base silently. With a few quick slices, a large hole was made allowing the group to slip in undetected.Funny was an understatement. The assholes were supposed to be able to get ready for battle in under a minute. That's why they were called minute men and not for the reason Kid liked to joke about. Imagine only lasting a minute in bed. That'd be embarrassing as hell.Fighting a bunch of losers in semi-dressed states was a sight to behold. They were beyond shocked to be ambushed at such a late hour. "To your battle stations. We're under attack!" the commander shouted. How did they get in so fast?!The small fries went down easily. Killer, Hip, Hop, Boogie, Mosh, Papas, Clash, Bubblegum, and Wire were slicing though their ranks like butter. Heat surrounded his foes in a thunderous blaze, only charred remains left in his wake. Jaguar, Snare, and Gig were punching through the throngs of soldiers, bodies flying in every direction. Dive was kicking people and ripping off arms with the strength of her jaw. House was infusing her magic into her ninjato; bodies slashed with the sword shriveling into husks. Reck and Alt fired wildly, competing as to who could attain more headshots.As usual the captain of the ship constructed his metal arms and went to work bashing skulls in. Just pulling in the metal nearby had shaken the building and took out several enemies. "Jeeze can't even identify who is supposed to be the head honcho with all this trash!" Kid roared sadistically, having thrown the commander straight into the wall, a spatter of blood leading down to his lifeless body."We don't need to know that; no one here is going to tell us anything. Just plow through these assholes!" Wire shouted above all the noise."I don't see why we can't take our time playing with them," Clash whined, bloodthirsty as always.Killer shook his head, his long hair swaying from side to side. "We don't want them figuring out what we're up to. These mangy dogs can't know we're looking for their secret underground tunnels, otherwise they'll destroy whatever they have before we can get our hands on it," the blonde said softly, slicing down another opponent. Jam surveyed the chaos with absolute exuberance. They're wrecking the place faster than I could solo. Die you stupid brain dead wastes of space. Looking at her captain, she was mesmerized by his battle prowess. He looked completely at home amid the chaos. "Your reputation for being an uncouth barbarian and attacking things for no reason is actually going to come in handy. No one will suspect we're up to anything," she said, punching a marine right in the throat, killing the unfortunate man instantly.Kid frowned, "I always have a reason for fighting someone."Vaulting to another opponent and slamming a boot on his head to smash his skull, the woman clarified what she meant, "Yes but that's not what they see. The reports they make about you state implicitly how violent the crew is. If they're going to assume you're too stupid and too violent to be up to anything, take it, run with it, and paint the town red with their blood in retaliation."He bit his lip, pondering her words.The surprise of coming from the top of the building instead of the front doors threw the soldiers for a loop. Half of the base's inhabitants had been sent upwards to fight the pirates while the other half went down to protect their assets in the tunnels. Unfortunately it wasn't long before the pirates annihilated their opponents, bodies littering the floor.00000000 00000000 00000000Afterwards, the crew had decisions to make. Heading down to the basement level lead to opposing paths. "We can fan out and contact a different group via Den-Den Mushi. The tunnel going due north is the one that most likely leads to whatever secret they're hiding in the jungle," Wire informed everyone."Then my team will go that way. Killer you guys head in the other direction. Call Heat if you find anything useful," instructed Kid.His orders given, the battle hungry man spied his scientist talking animatedly with Reck. He pouted, till a devious idea came to mind. Kid's large metal hand scoped Jam up, depositing her across his other shoulder, like a sack of potatoes. His team of twelve shared barely suppressed smiles at the Professor's predicament."Put me down!" she yelped, hating being lifted up suddenly. Why do tall people just pick me up like that? I'm an adult!"Why? You hate heights," he jeered, wrapping his good arm under her rump for 'support.'Dark brown eyes turned to slits, as the woman got ready to punch the asshole. "No," she hissed, trying to wiggle free, glad she had her collar fully up to hide the pink dusting her cheeks. "But I see no reason why I need to be carried."Kid's mouth split open into a wide grin. "I got an idea. I 'kidnapped' a scientist and they better move or you're dead." Her ass is right at eye level. If I 'accidently' turn my head, I can bury my face in it. My thick coat is in the way, but I can still feel those juicy melons. I'm a fucking genius! "This way you can direct me where to go. You may not know the exact layout of this base but marines are as unoriginal as they come. I bet this secret base follows a similar layout as any of the ones you've pilfered before.""While that is true, I can direct you from the ground and I am not a fan of the connotations such a position affords me," she said, shifting lightly to give her the leverage to attack him soon. His coat smells clean. Who would have guessed? It's made of a comfortable material; it's probably very expensive."In English smarty pants." Hmm no pants, he thought having ran his hand up her leg. That's twice I've known her to be wearing a skirt or a dress---She's girly..."You look like a damn Neanderthal that abducted a woman to take back to your cave. Put me down!" she screeched, pulling her leg back to kick him in the chest.Anticipating her move, the brute grabbed her ankle and held it flush against himself. Although Kid couldn't see her face, he could tell by her voice and the slight rise in her tone, she was embarrassed. You like humiliating me, maybe I'll return the favor.His subordinates couldn't believe his audacity. Well they could. Their boss always found a way to get what he wanted, no matter how farfetched a goal it was. Heat was embarrassed on the professor's behalf, sharing a grimace with House. Oh boss. Put that poor woman down."You said you'd follow me into battle, well that means following orders. If I say you're a pretend hostage, then that's what you'll do. Understand?"Jam huffed, but relented to his demands. Stupid oaf using logic to defend his vile punishment. He knows how demeaning this is...When Kid realized Jam was pouting, he decided to further illustrate his position. With a gloating tone, he teased, "We're destroying this base like you wanted. My crew gathered up a good bit of the shit you wanted. And you were so gun-ho at leaning about my powers. From your vantage point, you'll be able to witness firsthand my greatness. Think you outta say Thank-you captain," he mimicked her high pitched voice, chuckling darkly."Fine, thank-you captain jackass," she bit out, mad she didn't land that kick. The professor's moves were deadly, but with someone of his stature and strength, she needed the proper momentum to get in a good hit. Otherwise the ruffian could block it. Moreover, injuring him when there were enemies to contend with was just plain stupid. Kid smirked, recognizing that her jabs meant Jam was fuming at her loss.Ripping some large metal doors off their hinges, the pirates were greeted with an ambush of guns pointed directly at them. The tall redhead grinned maliciously, "You dumbasses never learn, do ya?" With a shout of attract, all of their weapons were confiscated and firing back at them, causing mass panic."Ah he's got a hostage!" one of the soldiers shouted, much to Kid's amusement."You said they'd assume the worse of me and that I would use that to me advantage. Don't get all pissy when I take your advice," he whispered rudely, bouncing her when he jumped towards an enemy.Jam snorted, "This is all just an excuse to pay me back for making a fool of you the other day. I'm facing the wrong direction and missing half the action anyway! " And if I didn't know any better, I'd firmly believe you were trying to feel me up. Pfft, as if you could handle all this.A beam of energy shot out directly at the Professor, but was deflected by a large hand Kid assembled out of the metal he gathered. "You can see plenty. Don't be so bitchy woman.""Why are you firing at the boss when he has a hostage?!" Boogie shouted in confusion, shaking his fists. Are they crazy?! Who shoots at their people to get to an enemy?One of the soldiers, most likely a highly decorated one by the coat her wore, shouted, "We can't afford to let a pirate get their hands on a naval scientist. If we can't save them, then its better we end them before they go blabbing military secrets!" The hoard of marines encircled the fearsome pirate getting ready to aim at the small scientist. They'd really kill one of their own... The pale demon of a man saw red, the tornado of metal he collected spinning, basically blending his foes to shreds, blood and mutilated corpses flying everywhere. His subordinates dashed out his way, knowing how angry their leader had become. Kid was breathing heavy, his nostrils flaring as surveyed the room for any survivors, finding only a few of the most powerful combatants left alive.Jam smiled, knowing how many crystals she'd make by the end of this. Doesn't matter if they're in pieces; I was going to melt them down anyway. The crew was hiding behind their captain, knowing to stay out of his way. Cheekily the professor waved to House, miming shooting herself in the head to make fun of her own predicament. The magic user giggled in response. Watching the captain fight was fascinating, even if she could only what was happening behind him; she studied the way the metal scraps swirled around the redhead, forming a slight eclipse. Each piece was carefully controlled and when he wanted, he was able to direct different metallic objects into whatever direction he desired. This brute has very precise control. It's astounding. I'll have to ask how he manages to leave the crew's metal weapons and many metallic accessories alone when he attracts everything else. Hmm, his hair fell flatter against his head when he exerted more force. Does he spike it up with magnetism? So that means even his hair is magnetic! The implications! Reaching up she lightly stroked his head, marveling at its softness, despite it sticking straight up.Kid turned his head sideways, burying himself into her side. Stop that," he muttered with a light snarl, the tips of ears flushing."You said I could study your powers. Now get your face out of my behind," she retracted her hand, frowning."It's not my fault your ass is huge. Like what the hell woman? Is this where all those treats you eat go?" the barbarian taunted her, marveling at how comfy the professor's rump was. I could take a nap on this ass.The woman smacked the back of his head roughly, ruining his fantasy. "It's genetic. It's how my people are built. Screw off," she hissed, muttering profanities and threats. I don't eat that many snacks! This fucking twat-waffle eats way more!The soldiers rushed ahead, intent on putting a stop to the pirates by taking advantage of the supernova's distracted state. Kid glowered as they approached. If he wanted to talk in the middle of a fight, how dare they interrupt him. With a snarl, the leader of the Kid Pirates rained down metal hell on all who dare came close. Even the two large signatures didn't put up much of a fight against his crew. He took down the stronger one and Heat took care of the other one. It was a mild workout, but nothing serious. Hell, he didn't even have to put tiny down. His other subordinates made quick work of the stragglers and soon there was no one left to fight.Ever since Whitebeard's death, the military had been less organized. There were even rumors Aokiji left after being denied the Fleet Admiral position when Sengoku retired.Kid scoffed. This place should be better guarded if their hiding a secret. They probably never anticipated us hitting up the base first. Probably thought we'd get weakened by whatever they have in the jungle and then exploit the situation. Pathetic.00000000 00000000 00000000Killer and his team make quick work of the few guards they came across. Not many soldiers. This route must lead to something of lesser importance. Slicing through a small platoon of about twenty-five, the pirate crew arrived at the end of the tunnel. It was a jail full of about one hundred or so prisoners. There were several desks nearby. The massacre soldier approached the largest one, grabbing the paperwork left behind. Skimming the intelligence, he was aghast.Killer immediately called Heat's transponder snail and reported finding several prisoners down the path he took. Killer went on to rely that the marines had used civilians as slaves, including woman and small children. "Kid the marines are using these guys to mine. They're hiding a diamond mine!"The fearsome captain's eyes lit up, fascinated by the turn of events. "A diamond mine? That's why those son-of-a-bitches keep the people afraid--- so they can loot the land! A pirate's greed is one thing but the systemic raping of the people is a level of villainy only the scum in charge can achieve."Jam, overhearing the conversation, sighed happily. "No secret base. Foo. That means no scientists. I guess you can put me down." Finally. The crew is giving me weird looks and it's creeping me out. Hip looks like she's contemplating my murder...I wonder if she's attracted to this idiot? That would explain why she's never addressed me directly before. She probably sees any new woman as competition. But that absolute moron has to know Kid's doing this to spite me for forcing out an apology. Ugh, unnecessary drama!Black lips curled into a predatory grin, "Naw. There may be more cocksuckers up ahead. You stay put till we clear this place out."Jam scrunched her face up, sick of her situation. "We both know you're doing this to embarrass me. You've made your damn point," she glowered. His arm is snaked underneath my ass. I know with my size it's really the only way to carry me, but this bastard is relishing my displeasure far too much and my ass is off limits!But Kid was too busy doing a mental victory dance to let her little growl bother him. In fact, it was cute how she was trying to weasel her way out of his grip. True she could transform and slip away, but the cameras could see her right now since she was much higher up than usual, and letting the marines know about her powers was a stupid mistake in her eyes. Transforming was reserved for emergency situations. Being irritated hardly counted."As the captain I'll determine when I've made my point. Besides why would I waste you on these losers? You conserve your energy and when we're done, you and Killa can go info scour. There might be something useful you two can nerd out over.""Whatever," she grit out.00000000 00000000 00000000The tunnel was long and winding, taking a full hour and a half to reach the mine. The crew ran into small pockets of marines every so often. They were quickly disposed of. Upon reaching the end, the pirates realized they were outside, facing the side of a large mountain. There was evidence of a mine shaft but some idiot had used dynamite to cave in the entrance. Sneering at their stupidity, it took only seconds for Kid to use his metal limbs to dig past the rubble, exposing the opening. "There are pickaxes nearby. Let's get to work people!"The crew cheered, eager to dig for untold riches. While Kid was distracted by the flurry of activity, Jam slipped from his grasp. "Get back on your perch before I lose something so tiny!" he shouted, knowing how much it was pissing the woman off.Jam lips pursed, aggravated that the redhead enjoyed calling her tiny. He hasn't stopped smirking this entire time. "I'm going to go back to the base and search through their files. I'll grab Killer on the way. Have fun playing in the dirt Kiddo!" She darted away giggling madly, fleeing down the tunnel to her captain's chagrin.Bubblegum snorted at her actions, drawing his boss's ire towards himself. Smiling hesitantly, the spiky haired man grabbed a pick, disappearing into the mine shaft with a wave."Get back to work!" Kid's deep baritone barked."Aye Boss!"00000000 00000000 00000000Killer freed the prisoners, knowing how the idea of slaves triggered several of their members. That's why Kid left all but his top commanders on the ship at Sabaody. That auction house was vile. Kid may have cracked a joke at buying someone, but that was just how he disguised his disgust at a situation they could do nothing about. They had heard how after the trouble Straw Hat caused that specific action house got shut down, but there were others. With the way the World Nobles threw money at slavers, the plethora of auction houses were like a hydra; cut off a head and two more popped up in their place.Most of the captives were the pirates who survived the jungle, but there were a few villagers who grew nosy, and several members of the supposed cannibal tribe that lived in the jungle. Everyone was far too skinny to be useful, covered in dirt, wearing tatters of once dignified outfits, and reeking heavily of stale air, body odor, and human excrement.A very skinny tall man with gaunt grey eyes approached them cautiously. "My name is Taiyokoko and I lead this tribe. We have lived on the island for generations but three years ago the marines discovered our mine and Commander Kirin arrested us, accusing us of hiding valuables from the military. We argued that it was our land and we only mined as necessary, but he forced everyone to perform slave labor. We must flee before he comes back," the lanky man pleaded."We've already dealt with him," said Wire calmly."Yeah his head's pinned to the wall on the first floor if you want to spit at it," Dive smirked, hacking up a loogie for emphasis."Or kick it," offered Mosh."Stab it!" Papas shouted, drawing in more to cheer alongside him.The older man gulped, but swiftly quelled his panic. "You must be fearsome warriors to have dealt with such a powerful foe," he said in awe."We're pirates," UK deadpanned.The chief steeled his nerves, realizing any smidge of fear would lead to disaster. "And so are some of the other prisoners we have labored alongside of. Prisoners who have bleed, starved, and died with us. We fear not your reputation pirate."Killer snorted. "You say that, but how do you know we won't kill you dead as you stand?" he asked flexing his arms, making his blades glint dangerously."A pirate takes what he likes. If you wanted my head, you'd have already taken it," the wise man stated calmly.Several members began chuckling, sinister smiles gracing their features. "So you get it? Good. We won't be on the island long. A week, perhaps a little more. During that time the crew will be mining. After that, we don't give a flying fuck," Wire explained."Honestly I never want to set foot in one again. Not after being a slave," a young man said, determined to look the pirates in the eye.Several heads nodded in agreement. An elderly woman toddled over, reaching for Quincy's hands, "May the gods bless you," she wept, tears leaking from her eyes. The poor doctor didn't know what to do, standing there awkwardly, with the woman gripping at her long flannel's sleeves, till she pulled away."We're not knights in shining armor, just pirates who hate the World Government. Your pretty words mean nothing. Beat it," Killer spat.The grey headed man bowed his head. "Be that as it may, thank you, truly."The tall blonde grunted, poignantly ignoring the man's gratitude. The freed people nervously eyed their reluctant saviors, but followed their leader and headed towards the exit, elated at their good fortune.00000000 00000000 00000000Jam found Killer part way down the tunnel and pulled him and Clash aside to gather up any relevant info they may find in the upper levels. The others continued onward to go help with the mining. Killer had already informed Forte and the other pirates on guard duty to come over and help mine as the ship would be fine with no marines afoot. He commanded Moai to stay behind and begin prepping for a banquet to celebrate their treasure haul.While the majority of the crew was focused on digging, the trio cased the joint for intel. They discovered that the traps in the jungle were very complicated. The government had used a holographic projector to spit out various scary images, ranging from large animals, monsters, zombies, mutated creatures, and ghosts. Jam had to explain what a projector was, but Killer was quick to catch on. Fuck these bastards scaring people shitless and robbing them blind.The trees and bushes all held traps of varying degrees. "Looks like we'll have to disable al this shit before we go exploring," Killer sighed, vexed by the extra work.The little woman nodded, "I still need to harvest various plants and I heard Jaguar go on about wanting to hunt with some of the guys.""We need to fill the freezer before we leave," the second in command said sharply, pounding one fist into the palm of the other.Jam snickered, Kid having told her how adamant Killer was about this freezer. "It would be prudent to take advantage of such a well stocked island. I want to get my hands on this holographic tech. It's a Vegapunk creation and I'm sure I could learn loads.""Thought you hated the man?" Clash spoke up, straightening the notes Killer dictated to her.The professor's countenance darkened, "I do, but he is a genius. I've got no qualms about pilfering from the ass. Plus how mad would it make the Government to know pirates are using their tech against them?" the scientist smiled maliciously.Sighing, Killer stood up, "Well we're done here, I'm going to head back to the ship and assist Moai with cooking. Clash hand me your notes and then follow the professor. Jam, go disable all the traps in the jungle you can get to before noon. Afterwards return to the ship for reporting in and lunch."The small scientist smiled, grabbing Clash's hand to pull her along. Those hologram makers are mine!Killer was flummoxed, scratching at the back of his head. I'll be a monkey's uncle, Bubblegum was right; she's perfectly fine with orders so long as you're not rude.00000000 00000000 00000000Clash had noticed several things about the little runt while disabling the traps. First, Jam was incredibly quick, able to dodge anything thrown her way. Secondly, tiny could use her powers to defend others, as her arms liquefied into jelly and created a shield around the two when a dozen poisoned arrows shot out from nowhere. The arrows became stuck in her purple arms and then fell harmlessly to the ground. She must be immune to toxins, probably from making so many herself. Third, the woman was meticulous as hell, having memorized the locations of the traps from the intel they recovered. There were a total of twenty three and they made quick work of over eighteen of them before noon stuck. Fourth, she had no issue following directions. Just as Killer instructed, Jam dutifully began the trek back to the Punk at exactly noon, eyes shining brightly, holding her prize of two holographic projectors.Clash was not a fan of these deceptive tricks the marines were using. Cowards! The fourth trap the two came across had been enhanced by one of the holo-thingy's. "Fuck what the hell is that?" the tall woman shrieked, brandishing her sword, only for it to go through the 'enemy.'Jam giggled, crouching down and moving aside shrubs to find her target. "An illusion. The machine should be around here somewhere. They have three of them total. Each one puts out sounds, images, even smells.""How does Vegapunk do that? Fuck those ghosts feel cold," said Clash of a group of three that passed by, wailing loudly."He's incredibly talented. A World Government pawn but talented nonetheless. This machine had a knob for temperature control. The images rotate on a pre-timed order; you may get ghosts and burst of cold air or zombies and the smell of rotten flesh. It's how the images feel so real. I'll figure out how the bastard did it when I take the damn things apart.""You sound excited," Clash mused. The Boss also gets tickled pink for machines and shit."Duh. Look I know Kid probably wouldn't want to beat someone by using trickery such as this but knowing how the shitty fuckheads operate is advantageous. And it could have other applications," the smaller of the two explained, disabling the machine.Clash nodded, thinking over the professor's words. She's not crazy all the time; something has to set her off. Outside of that, she's alright. I mean we would have ran into the jungle, eager to defeat whatever was in here, if she didn't warn us it was probably a trap. Sure we would have made it out alive but a lot of us would have sustained painful injuries. I'm not a fan of tricky fighters, but perhaps having one will prevent us from falling victim to the kinds of BS those types pull.The two fell into a comfortable silence, making light work of the nasty surprises hiding in the jungle before heading back to the ship.00000000 00000000 00000000Kid had to come across a windfall of cash to be able to have a base and more than one ship. That base of his had several ships and several unnamed pirates. He expanded. Man's got some cash flow. Cha-ching. His bounty didn't increase too much over time skip; I think he just never happened upon any difficult fights except for the one with the RedHairs and the minor squabble where he robbed Big Mom. I think he focused on making a hideout and perhaps his awakening. I also believe he mellowed out a bit; having a name for himself meant people were less likely to antagonize him, ergo less causalities.When Queen drops Kid and Killer into the water to drown, his hair lays flat when he gets knocked out as Big Mom crashes the scene. A few minutes later it's spiked right back up. It's not a product; it's his powers!If you do purchase a deep freezer, wait at least two hours until you begin stocking it up. I have my eye on this new one I want so badly, but damn it's expensive. I share my love of kitchen gadgets with Killer. Hehehe. Also that is how you identify a good coconut. Nothing is better than fresh coconut for a German chocolate cake!I was lurking on X and tumblr...artists are up in arms over the use of AI in images production. Those same artists who didn't bat an eye over AI taking work away from writers.I have a frenemy of sorts, we've known each other for ages, we share tons of mutuals. He draws. Incredibly well. So he has been begging me to write a story starring a charter I am not fond of. I will not write this fic. A: I have limited free time and B: writing brings me joy; this character makes me wanna hurl.So a different buddy had paid for a one week subscription of an AI image generator and everyone was dying at how bad/generic the pictures were. Eyes were wonky, extra limbs and fingers, weird stances, horrible expressions...it was outta there. Frenemy looked uncomfortable when the generator did produce a decent image; sometimes it did work and we all concluded that soon it would be capable of doing art alongside of a human editor.Now that AI is churning out images, frenemy was upset at how it would affect artists; although he didn't see the problem when it was affecting writers----I swear some people's heads are just empty storage spaces... Afterwards, the hypocrite rubbed in my face how he used AI to make a one shot. It was basic as fuck, but hey if it he enjoyed it, whatever. But I did argue that AI put writers out of business and stole its skills from those same writers in the same manner it was combing across the internet for images and drawing styles to steal from.Art it art. Why should a drawing of a character receive payment but the writing of a story with the same character should not? I heard the defense 'well it's my interpretation of the character in my art style' but somehow a fanfic is not? Bullshit! All art deserves praise and payment. We need less starving artists. Now this is free; most fanfiction authors write for free. That is their choice. That is my choice. However if they want to charge, that is also their choice. So if someone wants to request a particular story with specific characters, then they should expect to pay that author in the same way they'd pay a person to draw something particular. If we are using One Piece as he example, neither my frenemy nor myself own it. We are both simply fans. Why should his drawings get monetary compensation but not my writings?Since he really wanted that fic, I was willing to make a trade: A 2.5K story with his chosen barf worthy character for a drawing of a scene I wanted with Kid and Killer. No he wanted money, but thought I should do the writing as a friend, as 'it's not that hard to write.' Yeah, shit got heated.
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This took a really long time to flesh out properly. I thought about cutting it up into smaller segments, but figured with the long hiatus, it was only fair. Enjoy.00000000 00000000 00000000Around midday, everyone made it back to the ship laden with the loot they scored. The crew was hungry as hell, no one moreso than the Captain, who had been bellyaching about food for hours. There was a plethora of dishes to choose from, Killer and Moai having outdone themselves. Everyone was laughing and having a good time, pigging out and being rowdy.No one guessed the marines would be hiding a diamond mine, but four people won the bet partway having thought of slaves or a secret jail. Snare, Papas, Disk J, and Hop split the prize money, each excitedly planning their purchases.Jam quickly ate up, informing the pirates how excited she was to disassemble Vegapunk's holographic contraptions. "There's one more left in the jungle and five more traps. I'm going to tinker with what I've got and go to be bed soon." The short woman packed up a big plate for later, deciding to work through dinner. Let's take your military secrets, your hard earned work, and use it against you Vegapunk, you Beli-whore sell-out!Dive waited all of two seconds after the professor left before singing like a canary. It had been torture to keep quiet all day. Finally! I was going to blow! "We were all wrong. She's experienced," the blonde woman giggled, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively."Experienced?" UK asked, from beside her, confused as soup dribbled down his chin.Dive went on to explain about everything she learned. Jaws plummeted to the kitchen floor. The faces everyone has! House is so red! And the Captain…hehehe.Kid had no words. He hadn't thought about her previous sexual experience; things like that meant shit to him. But she had preference. Usually he was screwing a prostitute, a woman with experience, but who was willing to do whatever he liked for the right price. The girls who clamored for adventure, who wanted to be railed into next week, well they never had any complaints or any real requests other than harder…he smirked wickedly, relishing in the memories of past conquests. Of course she's a picky bitch. Difficult ass midget. Wonder what the little freak likes…"So what do we bet on now?" Reck asked. Wish I would have won that bet on the base. Need some new make-up."How long it's going to take the Captain to get in her pants?" Papas answered, helpfully, elbowing Hip in the ribs, making the women frown.Kid snorted, grabbing another plate of food. "I ain't trying to screw the potato gremlin."Several crewmembers side-eyed their leader, forcing the big brute to furl his lips."Boss you were feeling her up the whole time we tore through that base," Alt replied, staring at his leader with skepticism, as he signature glasses fell down his nose. How can he deny what he did right in front of us?"She was a hostage! And I was just holding her. Not my fault her ass is fucking everywhere," the redhead defended his actions, glaring down at his plate. Fuck who are these idiots to question me, their captain?! Piss off!The family bit was another punch to the gut. Not one of them really had any family left. Wire had a grandmother and few had some siblings that stayed behind on their home island, but that was pretty much it. "If she can just up and abandon her family like that, what's to say she won't do the same with us?" Gig quietly asked, gloomily staring at his dinner. I wish my family was a snail-call away."The Professor left to advance her science. She had to go. Same way we all left for adventure," Killer responded, trying to prevent his captain from losing his cool. Kid's no good when he thinks someone will abandon us…Hip shook her head. "Jam doesn't just have some siblings; she has the whole package: parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, the works! Who just walks away from that?!" God she's deplorable!"Maybe they were cruel to her," Bubblegum remarked, slurping down his soup. Lots of reasons to leave. Don't need to jump down the woman's throat making assumptions.Dive quickly dispelled this notion, shaking her head vigorously. "No she said they loved her. Funded her schooling and everything," she said, through a mouthful of bread. I bet it's nice to have parents who care…Kid grimaced, not enjoying the direction the conversation had taken. Killer quickly intervened, "That's how it's supposed to work. Family should support one another. She was born into a good family. We made ours; it's all the same," the massacre soldier voiced, with a tone of finality.00000000 00000000 000000000After dinner, the crew split up, most going out to enjoy the island. Wire, Heat, and Killer called Kid to the training room to spar just in case the heavy conversation from earlier was bugging him."So what are you going to do about your little hostage?" Wire asked gleefully, grappling with Killer on a workout mat.Kid glared at his close friend, and snorted, "Nothin', I taught her a lesson, we're good." He reached up blocking an incoming punch from Heat."Boss you carried her over your shoulder for ages, conveniently placing your arm under her ass," Wire replied, using his long arms to land a hook to the blonde's side.Golden-colored eyes widened, annoyed at having to constantly defend himself. "Her ass is huge. Where else was my arm supposed to go?""And I suppose your face just had to rub up on her rear?" Killer teased, reaching to pull Wire into a headlock. I remember when I was the tallest of us four…how time flies."You didn't come along with me, how the fuck do you know about that?" the redheaded man shouted, gritting his teeth."Everybody's talking about it," Heat chimed in, taking the chance to land a kick on his leader. He's so angry at being called out. We just know him too well."Gossiping ass hoebags," the man grunted before grabbing Heat's foot and throwing the tall man over his shoulder.Killer threw a flurry of punches at Wire, not even breaking a sweat. "Jam thought you did so to get her back for the other day and while I think you are still mad about that ordeal, you just wanted to bury your face in her ass," the blonde snickered. "No judgment, it looks nice and plush."The redhead rolled his eyes. "She needs to learn to take orders and my hostage idea was brilliant till those fuckers decided it's better to kill a scientist than let them live and share government secrets. And yeah, the little bitch has a nap-worthy ass.""Nap-worthy? High praise indeed," the masked man chuckled."We know how much you enjoy naps Boss," Heat added, wheezing.Kids right eye twitched in annoyance. "Shut-it, flame brain." Heat raised his hands in surrender, trying not to smile.Killer wasn't as kind. "Kid you went overboard when those marines attacked her. The guys said you broke into a frenzy. Jam would have been fine," the muscular blonde pointed out.Crouching slightly, with his hands opened in front of him, Kidd resembled a bull about to charge. "You know damn well that I think it's fucked to kill one of your own. They had that coming. That's what set me off," the redhead snarled, his voice rising steadily, as he rushed forward at his first mate, landing a swipe on him."Be that as it may, you didn't have to punish her by carrying her like a ragdoll," the older man chided, aiming a sweeping retaliatory kick at his leader.Kid grunted, falling over, "How the hell am I supposed to get her back for earlier? Making her train till she passes out would be a waste when she could be making us cool shit. Fuck off, I had her put your meat freezer on top priority!" he yelled, grabbing at Wire and pulling him down as Killer jumped out of range. Sneaky fuckhead!Killer frowned under his mask, his own voice rising in volume alongside his captain's. "It's the smart idea to finish it while we're visiting a plentiful island. And take those damn letters off my freezer!""Never!" Kid grinned maliciously.A small free-for-all brawl commenced, the four of them dog-piled on top of one another, fighting like small children. If anyone said anything, they were training. After tiring each other out, Kid panted heavily, sitting atop his blonde friend and holding Heat's head down against the sparring mat with his fist. Wire was pinned under Killer's bulky frame, "You cheating asshole, who the fuck bites?" Killer smooth vice rumbled out, trying to push the big baby off of him."You pinched me! Shut-up!" Kid groused, pushing his weight down on his almost brother.Heat rolled his eyes, while Wire grinned, both exhausted. "So how do you plan on dealing with this mess?" When Kid didn't respond, Wire grunted out, "You clearly want the woman Boss."The proud man waved his large hand, nonchalantly. "I'm going to the brothel later. I'll find a bitch that's got a body like the Professor and bang her brains out. That outta be the end of it," Kid declared, sick of this conversation.The guys looked at each other, wondering how their amazing leader could be so dense…but hey if he wanted to torture himself, who were they to stop him?"Master Kid, I don't think it works like that," mumbled Heat, exasperated with the situation."She's just like a new exciting dish. Once I've got a taste I'll always return to my favorite meal," the muscular man said with a grin."You mean hookers and easy port pussy?" Wire teased, stretching out and popping his shoulder.Kid hunched up, taking a defensive position, "Shut the fuck up. Don't make it sound grimy like that. Girls flock to me. I can't help it," the redhead huffed, bragging."You mean they mistake the jingle of nuts and bolts with the clinking of coins?" Killer mocked."You're dead, you fucking twat!" Round two soon commenced.00000000 00000000 00000000The tall pale man trudged through the streets of Hofuna, heading over to the brothel despite the advice of his friends. How dare they give me orders like that!Arriving at the entrance, he greeted the madam, who quickly called over a few beauties. Red locks shook vigorously, "No, bring out all your girls," he ordered gruffly.Kid studied the woman present, every last one with a bowed head. Sighing, he picked the woman who most closely resembled the little gremlin's body type. The sex-worker had a small stature, but was curvy with shoulder-length silver hair. She was dark-skinned, as all the island's inhabitants were, a bit darker than Jam, but close enough. The madam seemed perplexed by his choice, which weirded out the pirate. Why does she care who I fuck? Nosy old hag…Less than ten minutes later he was alone in a suite with the woman, who dutifully undid her robe and coyly asked what he wanted. Never being shy, the tall man barked out orders. "Look up at me. Don't stare at the damn floor when I'm here to gaze at," he commanded, putting his hand under the woman's chin. She nodded vigorously, her skin flushing slightly. "Better, now you know who I am, don't you," he grumbled, pulling her into his lap, as he reclined on the large bed.She nodded quickly, but that wasn't enough for the greedy pirate. "Say it," he whispered huskily into her ear, his hot breath making her flinch in anticipation."It's Captain Kid," she answered back, with a blush, proud she didn't stutter.Red lips twisted into a salacious grin. "Good girl. Now undo my pants and put those juicy lips of yours to work sucking me off," the redhead instructed, getting comfortable on the bed.The woman slid off him slowly, rubbing herself across his lap and down his leg. She gave a soft smile and reached to undo his belt. Her eyes widened in surprise as his thick cock almost smacked her in the face, eager to be out.Kid smirked, reaching down to palm her thighs. "Face your ass towards me like we're sixty-nining so I can have something to look at while you're tending to me."She blushed, hurrying to get into position. He nodded, admiring the view of her sexy cunt, already starting to dampen. Her ass is hot as hell. Reaching down, she gave a slow lick to the head, making him grunt. "Keh, ya like to tease, do ya lass?" he asked, a hint of his Scottish accent slipping out.The woman grinned to herself, taking just the tip into her mouth and sucking hard. The captain raised his eyebrows, his hips buckling, What's with little bitches and all this audacity? He smacked her ass hard, leaving a red imprint and forcing her to shriek loudly. "Behave," he growled, swatting her a second time.The small woman smirked to herself, knowing tonight was going to be good. Kid reached out and began slowing applying the lightest caress possible to her lips, barely teasing her outer folds. The woman buckled for a moment, moaning quietly. "That won't do. Need ya to scream me name," his deep voice admonished.Suddenly he smirked, slipping his index finger all the way inside her. The silver haired woman croaked out a loud hiss, clamping down tightly on his lone digit. "Want another one, do ya?"She nodded, taking more of his length in her mouth. He let her bob on his cock for a moment, slowing pulling his finger out as she whimpered in need. "I haff ta hear ya say it."His dick popped out of her mouth with the woman eagerly shouting, "I want more Captain Kid!"His smile became wild, his canines biting at his bottom lip as the pale man obliged his bedmate by easily stuffing her with two fingers. She let out a breathy moan, arching her back in pleasure. The two soon got a steady rhythm going, both getting close but stopping when the felt the other begin to cum. Sticky wet sounds and contented cries and grunts were all that could be heard. She's ready, Kid thought unable to hold out much longer. I wanna fill her cunt up now! He pulled his hand away, making her pout and stop what she was doing. Fuck she's hot when she's needy.Chuckling, he grabbed a condom off the dresser and after ripping it open, motioned for her to move over for a second. As he rolled it on his dick, he watched her eyes get a hungry look in them. "Tell me what ya want," his deep voice demanded."I want to ride you," she replied, hopping up to position herself. She was stopped by his arm reaching out and grabbing her tit harshly."Ride who?" he tsked, moving to bite her neck harshly."Captain Kid!" she yelped, not wanting to wait any longer.The large man lifted her up with one arm, sliding her dripping pussy onto his cock. They both hissed in gratification. The woman leaned forward, placing her hands on his muscular chest and using the leverage, began bouncing up and down. He let her get a good rhythm going before he took over, moving her rougher and faster than she had been going. Her cries became louder, leaking out of the room that was well insulated to keep sounds in. Some workers outside in the hallway tittered and giggled. She must be enjoying herself! The woman spasmed on his dick, squeezing down hard on the captain. He huffed, getting close. She's only climaxed once. Gotta switch it up before this is over.With a practiced hand, he flipped the woman onto the bed and really took charge of the pace. Ramming her into the bed, he used his hand to grope her chest, pinching and twisting her nipples. He bent down, giving a long lick to the side of her neck, before peppering it with harsh kisses and moving to her chest. The redhead sucked hard on her left tit, teasing the other with his hand.When he felt himself getting close, he bit her hard, which made her arch her back and scream his name. The call drove him wild, causing him to finish roughly, shouting unintelligibly. He pulled out, breathing heavily and rolled over for a moment, relishing his come down. He glanced over and smirked at the white-haired woman's zoned out expression.Sighing, he started to clean himself up. "We're here for a few more days. Might see ya again," he said, grabbing for his clothes. The young woman lay there, still catching her breath, unable to answer back. He smiled widely and gave her ass one last smack before departing the room. Opening the door, he found several blushing faces pretending to work. Kid smirked and slowly made his way out.00000000 00000000 00000000The next couple of days passed in a flurry of activity. Most of the crew was busy mining, gathering up as much as possible. A few had been tasked with helping Jam gather supplies and restocking the ship. She was grateful; Dive and House went with her to turn all the dead marines into biofuel, taking turns playing with her gloves and cracking morbid jokes at the expense of the dead soldiers."EW these fuckers stink," Dive huffed, holding her nose.House giggled, "I'm sure no worse than when they were living."Dive snorted, "You know girls go on and about a man in uniform, but ugh how boring. Bunch of conformist pigs," she huffed, glaring at them with disdain."And this uniform is just plain ugly," the demon-woman snickered, holding up a pair of standard blue trousers, still attached to a pair of rotting legs."Least their good for fuel. Probably the first time, they've ever been useful. Bet we get lots of crystals today! We should be set for a long time, huh Jam?" the pigtailed woman asked excitedly, hopping up on a ledge to survey how many bodies were left to collect.Jam hummed, doing some mental calculations. "I use a fair bit of power myself, conducting experiments. But we're good for now. Maybe if we're lucky, we'll find some cool loot hidden after we clean this place out.""Gonna blow everything up?" the blonde chirped, popping her goggles on, and rubbing her hands together. I want to be here when the island shakes this time!"In a few days. I promised Pomp he could do the honors. But right now, I'm still looting. Got lots of parts and whatnot. With the stuff everyone got in the jungle, my stock is looking brilliant," the scientist beamed. It's been so easy to get things with help."Have you got everything to make my glue?" the sharp-toothed girl asked sweetly, looking down and pouting.Jam sighed, shaking her head in mirth, "Yeah I'll have that done along with those dyes for Boogie. He only asked for six colors but as this island had been abundant, I'll probably give him ten.""Really? That's great. We could all use some more custom outfits," House cheered, happy at the prospect."I figure as payment we can probably get him and Snare to alter things for us," the professor explained, picking up some crystals she made."I always need things hemmed and taken in and Snare's stitch work is flawless," the bluenette praised her namaka."Same. It's hard being short. Don't tell bolt-for-brains I said that," she barked, glowering at the thought of that bastard smirking. Calling me tiny over and over. Still owe him a kick to the head!The two petite women shared a look, knowing how much their leader loved teasing their poor friend. "We won't. We also have trouble due to our size," House complained, frowning slightly.Calming down, the professor relented, "I could give you some help with that. I know the difficulty one has with being an adult that's smaller than average. There are ways to dress to help make sure people know you're an adult.""That would be wonderful. I always feel like some people infantilize me, going out of their way to protect me when I am a perfectly capable fighter," the mother-hen-like woman sighed. I do not need shielding!Jam nodded, being well acquainted with the feeling. "Your regular outfits should stay for battle. Those loose dresses are easier to fight in. But for going out and special occasions, I'll share my tips and tricks." House smiled, glad someone understood."Hey look these losers have money and stuff!" Dive shouted, waving a wallet and ring around, as the body she looted fell with a sickening plop to the floor."There are lots of shops here. Guess these ugly scrubs are paying to take us out," House grinned, reaching down and digging in a pocket, sticking her tongue out as she did so. She was rewarded with a wallet full of Beli.The three women stood in a line and mock bowed to the pile of dead marines, giggling madly when they righted themselves. "Shopping!" they coursed, jumping about.00000000 00000000 00000000The islanders were incredibly confused. They had known of the tribe that lived in the jungle, but those people had vanished years ago. According to the Marines, pirates had been responsible. But according to their previously lost loved ones, marines were to blame. It was a tough pill for the residents to swallow. But such a blatant act of villainy had soured their feelings towards the World Government. Shouts broke out in the town square…"Hell they made us sell them our produce at a price they chose. A price point that hurt us. Fuck 'em!" a middle-aged farmer shouted, raising his pitchfork.An older woman nodded, hugging a young man. "I thought the beasts in the jungle killed my son but he was made to be a slave! This is outrageous!""That pirate crew decimated the entire base. What are we going to do? Some of the marines were good to us," another muttered, concerned with their fate."Hey those pirates could squash us. I say we just let them do as they're doing and leave well enough alone," a man said, hopefully."They did free the natives. They didn't have to. And we wouldn't have known they were there. Everyone would have probably starved to death," a town elder replied.A young mother shook her head, "They also freed the captive pirates. Those guys could be just as dangerous."Chief Taiyokoko gripped his cane tightly and spoke up, "We became friends with the pirates that worked alongside us. They will do this island no harm. Everyone is simply happy to be free."A nervous-looking man quickly stammered out his concerns, "Yeah but what about the Kid Pirates?""They will be busy mining. If we leave them be, we should be fine. I doubt they have any interest in us as they are only passing through," the Chief stated with his booming voice. "That mine is full of bad memories. After they leave, we should stay out of it. Act like we know nothing. The pirates killed those marines and whoever was at the base. We will say nothing when a new batch arrives on the island," he commanded. They are already wanted, with large bounties. This won't affect them and I doubt they'd care.00000000 00000000 00000000Kid was slowly getting more and more furious. The crew successfully cleaned out the base and mined so much that the treasure room was full. After Jam disabled all the traps in the jungle, they had a good day exploring the jungle, hunting things to load up the freezer, and just taking in the sights.
A good portion of the island's inhabitants were friendly with them, giving them freebies and being generally pleasant. The food was great, the booze delicious, and their coffers were filled to the brim. All this happy good luck bullshit was pissing him the fuck off. Rat ass stupid smiling idiots! We killed the Marines, so what? We always fight those bastards. He thought grinding his teeth loudly.The majority of the crew was unwinding at a tavern, surrounded by beautiful women and copious amounts of booze. Usually, he would be in a great mood, but something was plaguing his thoughts, causing him to grip his tumbler tightly.A large hand clapped down on his shoulder, "Kid you good?" his second-in-command asked.The brute snorted, swatting the arm away. "Everything's fine, mommy dearest."Reaching up, Killer pinched Kid's cheek and cooed, "Aw is my babykins hungry? Maybe it's time for a nap. Perhaps on a big cushy ass," the blonde taunted. It's a shame the professor is off shopping with those two…hmm I think I'll name them the tiny trio. Or the shrimp squad…the coconut shrimp squad because they're crazy! he thought, softly snickering.Kid growled, twisting his body to glare at the massacre-soldier. "Bite me."The older man shook his head, "Can't, don't know where you've been."Kid frowned, before replying sarcastically, "So you're such a whore, you didn't feel me up your ass?""Always knew you were a dildo. Didn't think you'd admit it," Killer replied, quick with his wit.Chuckles broke out among the pirates, as their leader flipped off their first-mate. "The brunette at the bar is checking you out," Mosh said, having noticed the woman shimmy past several times in her shorts."Really, I hadn't noticed," the pale man deadpanned. She's gone by like six times. Take a hint."I thought you'd be good after your visit to the brothel," Wire smirked, giving Kid a knowing look. Face it, you know we're right.Kid pouted, glaring up at his taller friend. "I ain't in a mood. Just bored. We tore through that base like butter and now there's nothing to do. And these damn locals are too damn friendly!""Bet you wish the little gremlin was as friendly as that brunette was. Girl's been bending over and everything," UK whistled appreciatively. Hot damn I love it when a woman knows what she wants. She ain't hiding her interest in us."Guess her ass isn't big enough. Shame, she's cute," Bubblegum quipped, winking at the woman."You go for her then," the redhead grumbled, waving the spiky-haired man off.The slender man sighed, shrugging. "Alright, your loss," he said, walking over to the girl.Kid stretched, calling over the bartender to give him another drink. Everyone's so far up my ass, I'm surprised they can fucking breathe. He snorted and thought about his current little problem. So he was interested, so what? He'd give it a go, if there weren't potential complications.First, there was no way in hell he was going to admit the guys were right. I'd never hear them shut their damn yaps if that happened. Second, women came to him, like the sexy girl putting her ass in the air. Why should I do all the goddamn work? Lastly, and most frustratingly of all, he had no way to tell if Jam was interested. Usually, there were signs; little blushes, stolen glances, flat-out staring, trying to be nice to him. Fuck his Observation Haki gave him a basic read on people. But Jam never once got warmer than friendly.As a rule, her emotions ping-ponged all over the place, happy, sleepy, excited, angry, sad, murderous…but never did she hit horny or amorous or something he could work with. If Dive hadn't ratted her out, he would assume the professor was asexual.And Killer. First, he says no to fucking the gremlin. Now he seems ok with it. Make up your damn mind! And yeah his previous relations with crew members had gotten a bit sticky. The Hip thing, a big mistake. She was hot. She could cook. On paper perfect. But it all felt forced. They had nothing in common and the weird dynamic was too much for him. Plus the sex just wasn't it. She wanted things he didn't really like and he wanted things he could tell she didn't enjoy, even if she agreed to it. The first fuck had been awkward and it never really got better. The crew thinks we only did it once. Idiots. I tried to make it work…He had drunkenly kissed Quincy once, but it felt off. No sparks. He had fooled around with Joplin, but she got bossy afterwards. Not hot bossy, just naggy and whiney. He had done a few late-night sessions with Whitney, but it fizzled pretty quickly. We're better off as namaka, he concluded, shaking his head in agreement with himself.With Jam he knew the risks. I doubt she would stay if things went astray. Probably try and kill me, he thought with a shit-eating grin. But she might go after the crew too…And I'd lose a scientist. The big man sighed into his drink, not liking his options. Shitty fucking luck with this one. But fuck, get over it, there are plenty of other shorties in the sea, he grumbled, downing his glass.00000000 00000000 00000000The rest of the day passed quickly. Hop planned to have all the girls hang out with the Professor later tonight. She had House and Dive on drinks, Joplin and her sister on snacks, and of course they bullied Skillet into making desserts.Directly following dinner, they were all to gather in the woman's quarters. After the curveball Dive threw their way, they had to find out more about their mysterious crewmember. The night started off normally, with the girls painting each other's nails and then moving on to doing hair and make-up.Some of the guys had been upset at not being included, but they thought the professor might be open if there were no men. Probably hides under that coat because of a man. It's the only logical reason left...Hip sighed heavily, feeling a bit bad for being mean. She doesn't know the captain well enough to perceive his interest. Still, I wish she wasn't in my way.Jam was applying some of the moisturizer House made on Dive's face, tutting at the younger woman for not taking care of her skin. "You're skin looks like shit. You'll be an old crone if you're not careful."The small woman pouted, studying her visage in the mirror, "I could stand to look a bit older. People treat me like a little kid."Jam snickered, "We just need to update some things. You have to dress for your physique. Being petite comes with its own brand of issues.""So a little bird told us you all sorts of interesting information about you," Hop said, eager to get the ball rolling.The small blonde's eyes widened as she shook her head while staring at the professor. The scientist giggled, Pigtails looks like she's gonna shit herself. "Dive I told you when we talked I knew you'd squeal," she said, ruffling the smaller woman's hair. Hm, it's kinds dry. She probably bleaches it blonde. Wonder what color it really is?"Eeh? For real?" the smallest crewmember asked in disbelief. Oh thank-god. I didn't want her mad at me."Like a little piggy," she said, bopping the other's nose."Then why tell her anything?" Clash asked, perplexed.The scientist shrugged, getting back to Dive's makeover. "It's not like what I told her is some deep dark secret of mine. I would have told anyone had they asked.""Well then, have we questions for you," Hop stated, wanting to know more about their newest member.Jam put her hand under her chin and grinned. "Oh hmm, I suppose I could indulge you. We'll go round the room, giving everyone a turn. But there is a caveat," she snickered, wagging a finger at the much taller woman. "You must also answer whatever question you pose to me." She reached over applying the same treatment to House while Dive brushed her hair out."That's not fair!" Quincy shouted, thinking of the embarrassing questions she wanted an answer to.Whitney rolled her eyes. "No, it works. I've been with six different people. How many partners have you had?" she asked, applying some face cream. Don't want wrinkles ever!"Two one-night stands, four romantic partners, which I define as ones that lasted longer than 3 months, and one fuck-buddy," the scientist answered flippantly. It always goes to a sexual topic. Damn horny busybodies.Some of the ladies blushed, while a few hooted in support. When the noise died down, Hip stood up. "Where exactly are you from?" she asked, deciding to start off small as to not completely bombard the other woman. Ease her into talking. Get her relaxed so she spills everything."From the Kingdom of the Dead. Anymore specificity would require me to make you a member too," Jam replied ominously."What's your favorite sexual position?" Joplin went right for the kill, Quincy gasping in surprise, and Hip slapping her own forehead. Idiot! Dive's eyes lit up, her legs bouncing in place, as she struggled to sit still. House blushed and several others smirked.Jam bit her bottom lip, thinking for a second. "That's depends on the partner, but I do love reverse cowgirl. And you?" she posed, skimming over the giant make-up box on House's dresser. Oh, mascara. That will liven up Dive's pretty blue eyes."I don't know," the woman answered with a mocking grin. Like hell, I'll play your game.Jam frowned, glaring at Joplin for her cop-out."What color is your hair?" Dive asked, deciding to stick to a safe topic, in support of her new friend."It's black and long but I keep it pulled back or pinned up. Chemicals are killer on hair," she responded.Dive nodded and twirled a strand. "Mine's green but I've been trying out different colors for a while now."Jam sighed, "You need to give it a break from all the dying as its starting to feel brittle. We should apply some oil to it."A black manicured hand with long fingers waved disrespectfully. "Yeah, yeah. Don't get all distracted. Do you like men or woman or does it not matter?" Emma questioned, wanting to get back to the juicy stuff."Men. I prefer hard bodies," the curvy woman replied, finishing up on Dive's make-up. Ooh, the shadow really highlights her eyes."Ha! I knew I was right!" the slender woman shouted triumphantly, slamming her right fist down in her left palm.Coffee colored eyes narrowed to slits. "Your stupid éclair trick offered no insight into my sexuality. Besides that not even how you suck a dick you amateur," the little woman hissed out. Stupid stringy bitch. I should ring her skinny chicken neck.Emma pulled a face, sticking her tongue out. "I've never sucked a dick. They're gross looking...bleug,"she grimaced. Women are so pretty. The pussy is like a beautiful flower, so soft and warm. Dicks looks like funky eels and hairy balls are disgusting. Nothing 'bout a man gets me excited.Jam snorted, crossing her arms across her chest. "That's obvious. That pastry you rammed in my face scraped the top of my mouth. Had it been a real cock there were have been teeth. One would assume that if you bother with giving fellatio, you liked the guy enough not to hurt his dick. Also I gagged a bit and nothing would ruin intimacy more than barfing all over a person," the inventor sneered.There was some light blushing on several faces. Jam grabbed a black ribbon and used it to add a waist to Dive's normally loose-fitting dress. There it's black so it will blend in. Maybe I can get Snare to take it in for me later. When you're small, loose clothing adds to the child-like appearance.Emma slapped her knee, snorting "I knew you were a dick-sucking queen! Got your technique down and everything!"The professor glared at her. Snaking past that mine field, before a fight broke out, House asked, "So what's your favorite part of a potential partner? I'm partial to a deep voice." Makes me melt internally."I like a big lap I can use as a throne and strong arms that can squeeze me tight," she gushed. A few of them smiled, knowing Kid fit the bill."Dive let it slip that someone may be interested in you. What are you planning on doing about it?" Hop asked, curious about the fate of her boss."Nothing. I'm not going to acknowledge a coward who can't talk to me," she said in a weary tone. Hmm, Hop planned this evening. She must be most concerned about this mystery man. I think Hip likes the captain so she's most likely asking about this dude for her sister. Like I care about something so asinine. God the way they worry about this guy makes him sound pathetic.Mouths hung open and a few fist balled up. How dare she call him a coward! "Then why do you tease him so much?" Quincy asked, trying to get to the bottom of the situation."What the hell are you talking about?" the intelligent woman shrieked, confusion lacing her voice."You're constantly shaking your fucking ass," Clash decided to let the cat out of the bag and get over the biggest gripe her crewmembers had."No she doesn't. Only when she works," House was quick to advocate for her friend."So I dance while I'm working. It helps with the monotony. You ever spend hours making the same shit over and over? It sucks. And it's not my fault you guys decided to spy on my ass, literally," Jam spat."We didn't mean to intrude on such a private moment," House explained, red from embarrassment.Jam gestured her hand in a no motion. "You misunderstand me; I don't dance like no one's watching. I dance like I command the whole room. Dancing is big back home," she explained."But your movements seemed kinda boring when you danced in front of us after that gigantic explosion compared to when you were alone in your lab. You can really shake those tail feathers!" Emma laughed, wiggling her tush.Jam threw her head back and groaned. "It takes longer than three minutes for me to really get down. That little bit I did when I blew that base up was a warm-up.""You tease him other ways!" Joplin shouted, her ears steaming. I know you do it on purpose!Deep brown eyes narrowed, not believing the shit spewing from this bitch's mouth, "Oh do tell," she said sarcastically, reclining in Dive's bed, as she applied a curling iron to House's locks."It's the way you speak," the pinkette clarified."I can't control the cadence of my voice," she jeered, knowing how people thought her accent was sexy."It's not just that. Everything you say has innuendo," Whitney added, understanding how Kid's mind worked."It does not. Look if this idiot, whomever he is, twists shit in his mind to be dirty, that's his problem. If I wanted to tease a man, it's not like I don't know how," the scientist huffed, balling up her fists."So how would you tease this idiot?" Dive giggled, her squeaky tone peppered with mirth. She grinned heavily, styling her hair into her trademark bubble pigtails, the picture of innocence."Well for starters I could put my tits in his face, sit in his fucking lap, whisper naughty nothings in his ear, steal a kiss…I have done none of that. Tell me what exactly have I done to tempt this man?" she yelled, vexed by this situation."You have hugged him with those giant milkers of yours," Emma pointed out, reaching out to grab at Jam's chest. The small woman swatted her hand away, making the slender woman pout. So close…"I can't do nothing about that," she grumbled, stomping her foot down. "I hug, it's platonic. I don't control some random fucker's horniness!"Going off the handle, Hip lost it, angry at how well her captain had been treating the scientist with her not even paying him any mind. "He's nice to you!" she shouted."Nice?" the professor asked quizzically, pondering all her interactions with the pirates. "I suppose the guys here are pretty accommodating. But all things considered, I am accommodating in kind. How many things have I invented for the ship so far? Let's see, a giant freezer, a dehydrator, medicines, the beginnings of a new weapon for the captain based on electromagnetism, and oh yeah, unlimited power for everyone's dumbass crap," she finished sarcastically, before continuing on her tirade. "Plus I'm almost done with a few more things, like that pasta maker and hypoallergenic gauze. So what exactly do you mean by nice?" she bellowed, standing up menacingly and clenching her jaw.Her anger had a few of them flinching. She doesn't look so small when she gets like that. "Um well," Hop began, stuttering. Fuck we don't want to give away too many details least she figures out it's the captain…"He doesn't yell at you the way he typically shouts at everyone," Quincy muttered, saving her friend from ratting out their leader."He brings you snacks!" yelled Hip, balling her fists by her sides. Snacks he has me prepare!"He praises your work!" Joplin shouted, red in the face. Him and Killer have been fawning over that stupid freezer. We haven't ran out of food in ages! We don't need it and we don't need you!Jam cocked her head to the right not believing what she was hearing. "Ah you're crumb bums," she finally said sardonically, slamming her right fist down into her open palm. Several of the guys bring me snacks, they all praise the things I invent, and no one save the captain has ever yelled at me."Excuse me?" Whitney asked, annoyed, folding her arms across her chest.The professor put her index and pointer finger close together, miming something minuscule. "You accept tiny little crumbs of affection and considerer that good enough. No one here has done what I consider to be the bare minimum for even approaching me in a romantic capacity. Fuck, even if it's just for some casual sex, I like to be treated well. I have exacting standards.""Aren't you a prissy primadonna?" Clash snorted, finishing up the bright red polish on her nails.The petite scientist shrugged, "Hey if you settle for crumbs, don't cry when you're still hungry. My greedy ass wants the whole enchilada.""What's an enchilada?" Dive hopped up, having a blast, a true enjoyer of chaos. I knew tonight was gonna be so much fun.The professor smiled, going into teacher mode. "It's a very delicious tortilla coated in a spicy tomato-based sauce with cheese and usually stuffed with beef or chicken. But I meant it as a metaphor. As in I want everything," she explained, using some new eye shadow on House. I missed doing this with my friends and cousins back home…"What's a tortilla?" the bubbly blonde asked again.Whiney frowned, pushing the talkative biter away. "Enough stupid questions. What do you require?"Jam snorted and rolled her eyes. "I'm not telling you all that. It's bad enough how intrusive several of the questions have been. And a tortilla is a flat circular unleavened bread disc made of cornmeal or flour and filled with savory vegetables and meats. It's delicious," she replied, unable to ignore her closest confidant.The room's atmosphere became stagnant, as the professor contemplated the evening. This whole night was to find out more about my sex life and how I feel about a relationship. Waste of a good time in my opinion. "You guys are really worried about this mystery man," she mumbled, studying the room's occupants and the overarching feeling of distress.Jam sighed and chose a pair of sparkly kitten heels for Dive, who eagerly put them on, posing sexily and pouting in the mirror afterwards. "Look whomever he is, you guys are entitled to him. You know him better, fuck take your chance. But don't be the monkey on my back flinging shit at my face because the weirdo is attracted to me."It got quiet after that, no one having a good retort or way to restart the conversation. But if they thought for one second that the professor wasn't a petty bitch, they really hadn't learned anything at all.The small woman finished up on House, adding a spiky silver belt to her dress to show off her curves. "House you got any nice shoes? I think we're the same size.""Um, yes I do. You wanna borrow a pair?" the blue-haired woman asked kindly.Rifling through the shoes the other woman brought out, the professor selected a pair of black stilettos with a lacy bow on the back. She threw them to House and winked, "Put those on."House blushed but complied.Going back to the pile, she chose a pair of four-inch purple ankle boots that caught her eye. Slipping them on, the scientist unbuttoned the top two buttons of her lab coat, exposing a silky black blouse with a scoop neck top showcasing her ample chest.Humming, she admired herself in the mirror, reaching down and detaching the bottom of her lab coat, showing off her shoes and toned legs. When it was hot, or the terrain was treacherous, the coat could be shortened by a foot by unfastening the snap buttons all around it. Folding the fabric neatly, Jam put it down on Dive's bed.The top collar of the lab coat had two thick straps covering her face. The bottom one exposed her lips and was the one she removed for eating. Popping it off, she reached into her pocket, pulling out a shiny lip gloss to accentuate her purple lips. A kissable pout, a man's true weakness…Hop went wide-eyed in surprise. Blinking slowly and stupidly, she asked, "What are you doing?"Jam smiled diabolically, licking her lips. "You claimed I tease this poor unfortunate soul. If you're accusing me of the crime, I might as well commit it," she practically sang out, deciding to be spiteful."Ah! You can't do that!" several voices shouted at once, jumping to their feet. Dive broke out in a fit of giggles and elbowed House, who covered her face, trying to remain composed. Being childish again are we Jam? For all your intelligence, you're really no more mature than any of us."You're going to stop me?" the woman chuckled darkly, a bit of mania leaking out. The other women exchanged nervous glances. "He's a big boy. Quit acting like anyone on this crew needs to be babied," the small woman snapped, putting her hands on her hips. "Come on you two, let's show off your outfits and see what the men are up to," she cackled."Coming!" her cohorts answered.00000000 00000000 00000000Kid was relaxing on the deck with about half of the guys milling about, drinking straight from a bottle of rum. There was music playing in the background, guy's playing cards and horsing around. It was peaceful, till he heard shrill shouting and evil giggling coming up the stairs. Dive had a nefarious giggle; it sounded so girly, but sinister at the same time. The professor shared this trait, making Kid wonder if it was true what they say: the shorter the woman, the closer to hell that bitch be. He chugged his rum, knowing that if shit were to hit the fan he would rather not waste good booze."Told you it was bad idea to leave those women alone. We should've been spying," Boogie side-eyed the cabin door that lead below deck to the sleeping quarters."Hey I like my bits where they are," Reck shook his head, deciding to fold. He sipped on some wine, pouting about his loss.Thrill looked up from his comic book, "Those woman are crazy," he complained. Is it too much to ask for some quiet?"But aren't we too?" Skillet asked, finishing out his hand of poker, and piling up his winnings."Yeah, but would any of us chop off a pair of tits? We've seen Hop castrate an enemy," Compo grimaced. I know the fuckhead deserved it for grabbing her ass in battle, but I wish I could flush it from my brain."Don't remind us!" They all shuddered, grabbing at themselves."I wonder what's got them all aflutter," Hear murmured, when he recovered from Compo's remark.The below deck cabin door was kicked open, blonde pigtails bouncing into view, laughing, as what he now dubbed the mouthy midget musketeers, emerged. They were quickly followed by a hissing Hip, Hop, and Joplin and a chuckling Emma. The others looked agitated or nervous, putting the whole crew on edge.Kid never really thought of either House or Dive as attractive. They were petite and he viewed Dive like a little sister, causing mischief and pranking the crew and House as a mother hen, taking care of everyone and trying her damnedest to keep the peace among such a rowdy crowd. They both wore loose fitting dresses, which while feminine did nothing to draw in his attention. But apparently with the right make-up and outfits, they were more appetizing. The thought grossed him out. Ugh…he shuddered, looking ready to hurl.When the little gremlin emerged behind her two best friends, his eyes did a double take. Her tits are out! Caramel colored handfuls of giggly flesh…he turned to Killer and pointed to Jam's chest with his eyes. Those melons bounce with each step she takes! And why are her lips so shiny?! Who's attention is she aiming for?!Killer nodded ever so slightly, motioning downward and drawing Kid's eyes to the sexy leather purple boots the woman wore, effectively overloading his mind. That ought to be kick to his face, the big lug. Don't know what inspired this…feel a bit bad for the metal head.Most of the guys were in shock. Bubblegum stared off at his captain, mumbling to those closest to him, "She's gonna kill him. Here lies Captain Kid, death by blood loss cuz it all went south."Pomp snorted, but blushed. "Can't really help it. Those cannons are hard to hide." She could smother me with those."We're hitting up the bars!" the evil trio waved, dashing to the gangplank.Kid's brain rebooted at that, making the large man jump up and land in front of his subordinates, who giggled wildly. For some unknown reason Jaguar was right behind him, mouth ajar. "I thought you were having some girly night in," the boxer rushed out, surreptitiously eyeing Dive.The professor smirked evilly, I knew it! Now to get away, and leave him wanting more. I wonder if he'll follow after Dive or not?"Everyone was being so boring. We're going out to party!" Dive shouted, cheering, her cat-eye make-up giving her a more seductive appearance. I look amazing! Bet guys will buy me drinks for once."Don't you need someone to come along? For safety," Jaguar asked, a slight flush creeping up his face. She looks so pretty right now. Fuck, the barflies are gonna be all over her!"It's just a bunch of civilians. Why the fuck should we be worried? Who the hell is gonna mess with the Kid pirates?" Dive shouted, eager to head out. He is so mean to me, always spoiling my fun. Go away, you ugly bastard."You don't look like pirates right now," someone muttered."And what's that supposed to mean?" House snapped, getting angry and scanning the crowd for the perpetrator."You don't look rough or nothing. Like usual. Someone might try something," the poor man tried to explain."We're not unarmed, stupid," the biter hissed, pulling a dagger out of her cleavage. Jam was grinning, watching poor Jaguar flounder. She skimmed the crowd, trying to see if anyone was checking her out. Darn, too many are distracted by my knockers. Shit. Plan failure.There wasn't much Kid could do. He never limited his subordinates from doing as they pleased long as their shit was taken care of. Plus Dive made an excellent point. What dumbass would dare to fuck with one of my people?! But those little witches were bound to attract unwanted attention. He could hear Killer trying not to laugh, a grumbling, almost purr emitting from the blonde. This shitty asshole is laughing. Motherfucking cunt…and if I stop them, that bastard will act like he was right. Wire, the cockeyed bastard, looks way too fucking happy. It's unnatural on him. Outta repel him into the harbor. Hm, Heat looks antsy. Big-ass softie is probably worried about these three. Clearing his throat, he growled, "Go, but be back in time for your shifts.""You got it boss," Dive saluted, before sticking her tongue out at Jaguar. Three small ladies jumped to the docks and bolted into the night.00000000 00000000 000000000I've wanted to do this chapter for so long. Work is the bane of all my enjoyment. Along with my other responsibilities…This man is thick. Kid's smart about his powers and how the world operates but not smart about his own emotions. It's gonna take while for the nail to really hit him over the head. He thinks he's just horny because she's new and shares a similar hobby. The idea of liking a woman in particular is not something he would ever willingly admit easily. But I do hope you liked the taste of smut I wrote.Did you see episode 1080? His crew is fun! He is trying so hard to be grumpy and serious. Don't get cozy with the others. Killer over here acting as Captain and telling everyone to go get trashed at the festival! Ah the debauchery!Several who have taken to including more of the Kid Pirates into their writing have decided that Dive is a child. If you view her original concept art, she is a petite woman. It's a hard line; petite people often get infantilized. I just can't see Kid taking an actual child along, unless he had to. Plus she is drinking beer along with the others in Wano and I'd hope someone (most likely Killer) wouldn't allow a child to drink.
I've wanted to buy some merch for a while. Know any good small artists on shopify or etsy that make nice things?I found out recently through a translated interview that Oda was inspired to write One Piece by a cartoon called Vickie the Viking, so I'm hoping the Punk Victoria is alright in some capacity as are her inhabitants…Spoilers:000000000000000000000000000000000000If you've seen 1115, just know Oda is a mega troll. I wanna kick him in the head for getting my hopes up. Remember the fake Strawhats? Well the same ugly guy is cosplaying as Kid and his crew. It's ridiculous. Now they guys have been in impel down since Sabaody and Elbaf is not affiliated with the World Government and does not give updates on what happens on its shores to the news. No one knows anything about what transpired between Kid and Shanks. Plus it just happened. I think Oda was being a troll and coinciding this with 1079 being animated. Still, I hope the guys are alright.