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A snake slithered across the ground, slowly and inconveniently. Not being able to walk was a ridiculous curse. Not being able to interfere with human civilization was, perhaps, worse. After years, he was simply getting tired of it. But this would be alright, he was sure, because now things were getting on the right track. They were... what, a decade and a half away? The snake was ready for a change.At first, he could admit, it had been almost nostalgic being like this, if he could ignore how annoying the world was. He could fix it in time, but until then he could party. Snake party. Do snakes party? Besides the point. The thing was, last time the snake had been this way, he had pulled off possibly one of the most iconic things that he would do in his life.The snake spotted a boy, now, not far off, standing outside of a local library, on the phone with someone. The boy, maybe twelve, but small for his age, sounded upset. Little did he know it, but the snake was very, very excited to meet him. Little did he know it, but the snake would grow to make the boy even more upset over the next few years.--The bird was indignant. Birds weren't good enough, in his professional opinion. He was meant to be a dragon! But no, those just had to go extinct. Now, he was consigned to sitting on telephone poles and pecking at birdseed. However, he wasn't perhaps as angry as he might have been, for having been unjustly looped into this punishment along with his brother. The bird could see the bigger picture, after all. And the bigger picture was a beautiful one. He trusted his father's plan.And unlike the snake, he was just fine with watching humanity passively. Though, of course, he wasn't in any contact with the snake, but he figured that guessing the snake's mentality was an easy task. The snake was always so plain with what he felt.The bird was looking after a young man of about sixteen. He always did. He watched from different, equally birdlike bodies, keeping the young man safe since before he had been a young man at all. The bird was always happy with watching from the shadows. As of the moment, he sat on a windowsill, where he had made his nest for a better vantage point, looking in through the window. Inside the motel sat the young man, sitting before a TV and waiting for his brother to return from the library, where he had gone after school.When eventually the door did open, and the young man's brother came through it, the bird practically squawked with shock. Not really, of course, that would be unbecoming of him, but still! The brother entered with clasped hands, asking his brother the ever so common 'can we keep it?' for boys of his age. And in the brother's hands was a tiny- what, garter snake?The bird could tell, of course, that this was no ordinary snake. Perhaps the young man could, also, because he recoiled. The bird would not stand for this blatant interference on the snake's part. He ought to even the playing field. If the snake was going to get involved, then so was he.The bird banged his beak against the window, drawing the attention of the young man and his brother.--The snake and the bird went through many different faces, though there were constants throughout the years. The snake was always a snake. The bird was always a bird. The boys were always very annoyed by their presence. And this was the way in which they continued.
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The inside of the vent was covered in a thick coating of dust, and it had been all that Sam could do to force himself to climb inside. He had been the only one small enough to manage to fit inside the vent, being fourteen and small for his age, so naturally he became the one to be the bait. Yippee. He just loved being vampire bait instead of doing his trigonometry homework.The plan that John had made was simple. Sam gets fake caught, Dean and John come in and do some vampire killing.That was the plan. Sam didn't like the plan. He thought the plan was stupid. But he was still climbing through the vents anyway.Inside Sam's hoodie pocket was a tiny little snake. It was green and about the same width as his pinky, and it had been a pet for about two years now, without John's nor Dean's knowledge. Dean had seen the thing when Sam proposed they kept it, had given Sam some sort of lecture on 'germs, Sam, you don't know where that thing's been!' and then Sam kept it anyway. Dean was right about tons of things, like cars and girls and hunting, but this wasn't one of them. This little guy was harmless! Sam had named him Angus, as in 'anguis,' which meant snake in Latin. Dean would probably have approved of the name, for more AC/DC related reasons.Anyway, the snake was relevant in this vent situation because vents are very, very small. Sam, however, was not very, very small. It took a great deal of effort to climb through the tiny vents, and a greater deal of effort to make sure Angus stayed safe in the pocket. And the vent was so cramped that Sam-Sam stopped dead as he felt the little guy move out of his pocket. Oh, come on, now? At this very moment? He groaned, annoyed, and tried his best to grab Angus before he slithered out of Sam's reach. He didn't have time to deal with a runaway snake. But funnily enough, Angus didn't really go much of anywhere. He just climbed into Sam's hood. He was relieved. Climbing through vents should be much easier without worrying about the snake in his pocket."Thanks, little buddy," Sam whispered, continuing on.Eventually, he hit the grate. It was the moment of truth. Well, the first in a series of moments of truth.Clang.What. The living Hell. Was that?Sam hadn’t been expecting something so loud, he hadn’t thought he’d been that far off the floor, John hadn’t planned for that, he’d told Sam to take out some before getting caught…Sam was frozen. He could see the vampires, who had all obviously heard it just as clear as he had. It was only a matter of time until they found him.It was time for something risky.Sam dropped onto one of the crates, then to a lower one, then hit the ground. He held his blade out in front of him, as the vampires were close now. A couple held smashed beer bottles as weapons, because of course they did.Sam felt a blow, though he didn't see the attacker. Everything went black.--When Sam came to, he felt sick to his stomach and everything felt fuzzy. He was probably concussed. He was vaguely aware of the vampire's conversation, but he really just did his best to not fall asleep again. Wasn't that what you were supposed to do? It felt counterproductive at this point. He wasn't sure. It felt like his brain was mush."-Should we drain him?" Asked one vampire."This kid is like, twelve. Do you really think he showed up here alone?" Said another."Still-" Sam felt a hand on his cheek, "I'm starving. And you hit him pretty hard, if he dies before we can-"Sam heard a shriek then, from the vampire who had just touched him, "The kid's got a snake in his hood! That's disgusting!"Next came the sounds of combat- the cavalry was here. John and Dean. Turns out, Angus had been the perfect distraction.--A couple months after the vampire incident, Dean had once again been left to take care of Sam while John went out hunting. Dean was an adult, but still, John didn't like Sam and Dean tagging along very often. Sam was hanging out at a friend's house, for once, so that left Dean to do whatever he pleased. And at the moment, what he pleased was to visit an arcade. Because why the Hell not?Dean pulled into the parking lot, made sure to lock the impala, and went inside. He picked a machine, a pretty new one by the looks of it, compared to the other ones. A racing game. It had only been a couple minutes though, before Dean became aware of a couple of kids, staring at him with distaste from a little way off. The three kids were maybe Sam’s age, but looked a whole lot more annoying.After a couple minutes of feeling their eyes boring into his back, he turned around, “What’s the deal?”The first kid, with flat brown hair, quoted back in an annoying voice, “What’s the deal?”“Step off, dude,” Dean said, turning back around trying not to pick a fight with these kids.The second kid, very blond and staring very annoyingly, also mocked Dean, “Step off, dude.”“What, you want the game?” Dean guessed.“Uh, duh. We were here first, ass-face.”“Funny, you weren’t here when I walked in.”“Funny, looks like you’re stupid. We just stepped away for like, ten seconds, and you stole it,” Said the third kid. “So give it back.”Dean frowned, “Sorry, you may not realize, but this is a car game. I don’t mean to assume, but you twerps probably can’t drive for shit.”“Oh yeah?” Questioned the first kid. Sounded like a challenge.“Yeah,” Dean turned back to the game.“There’s a two player game just over there. Pretty much the same mechanics,” Mentioned one of the three kids.“That’s a challenge?”“That’s a challenge.”“Dean scoffed, “Dude, look out that window. See that car? Dope as hell, yeah? That’s mine. Not a dent in the hood or a scratch in the paint. I am the best driver in this building. You’re about to get crushed, twerp.”The kids led him over to the other machine and began to bicker about which of them was the best. Eventually, they pushed forward the blond one and the games began. This was one of those games where you got power ups, which you could sabotage the other player with.Dean won the first round with ease. The blond kid managed to pull the second. And came the deciding round. Last lap, Dean was starting to lag behind- the kid had got a speed boost. He caught a powerup- bam, and the blond kid’s tires just got slit. Dean crossed the finish line.“Hell yeah!” Dean threw his hands in the air, “I win. See you never, dweebs!”As Dean walked off he heard the other kids picking on the blond one, but he let them be.It was an hour or two before he got a call from Sam saying that he was ready to be picked up, and Dean left the building. He fished his keys out of his pocket and-Hey, was that those kids from earlier? Near the impala?“Hey! You!” Dean called out.The kids looked up. The blond one had stuck a knife in his goddamn tires!“Get away from my car!” Dean yelled.The kids followed instructions a bit too well, running off at top speed.“You little shits!” Dean raced after them. Now, Dean was damn fast and had murder on his mind (also some torture, like, a lot of torture, and it would end with death) but these kids could probably sense they were about to die. They ran through a fence in a chain link fence down in an alley, locking the gate behind them.Dean shook the gate, “You pricks! Open the door and maybe I’ll kill you quickly! You do not let the air out of my tires!”“Why the hell would we open-” The brown haired kid stopped when all of a sudden a whole ton of bird shit dripped down his face. “Ew, what the fuck?!”Dean looked up to see a pigeon. A specific pigeon, “...Bird?”That was his bird. Well, not his bird, but that bird was always around him, pretty much a pet by this point. He even named it. Bird.
Dean grinned, “Good bird.”
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Overall, throughout the years preceding the apocalypse, the snake and bird had saved the boys’ lives hundreds of times. They’d been very helpful in a myriad of situations. What was interesting was that every time the bird or snake died, another one would come to replace them within days. People did wonder at the Winchester boys’ ability to just attract animals like that, even them.
But it was undeniable that they were useful in keeping the boys safe.
It was almost like they had some kind of personal reason for protecting the Winchester boys.
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Sam and Dean had both given up.Dean might've had it a bit better. When he was doing undercover work, or went inside a building, whatever bird had decided to follow him that day would leave him alone for a bit. Currently, a sparrow sat on the windowsill. It'd been hanging around for about a week now.Sam, however, tended to have to pry off whatever snake it was that had decided to attach itself to him whenever he wanted to do just about anything. As of right now, it was a black one, red eyes, of a decent length, draped around Sam's shoulders as he read one of Bobby's many old books."Sam, can't you get that thing out of my house?" Bobby asked, though he knew the answer from years of asking the same question, "It's damned creepy.""No self respecting hunter likes a snake. They’re creepy," Dean chimed in, though he was distracted. He was giving his sparrow little bits of birdseed."Wish I could, Bobby, but it'll find a way back in," Sam said, sounding tired. He'd been researching the apocalypse all day and found squat."Those things stick to you like moths to a flame," Bobby sighed."Yeah," Sam, despite being incredibly inconvenienced by these things that followed him around, he’d come to accept them as a fact of his life."I never get used to it, no matter how many times I see you with one of 'em. Don't 'spose it could be something worth a case?""Nah, we tried pursuing that like six times. Dad was especially curious," Dean chimed in again, "The snakes are just snakes, and it's not like Sam's anything supernatural. Besides, that would make a terrible monster. Oh, it's snake guy! He's got a ton of snakes! They’re not poisonous, but hey, it’s spooky!"Sam gestured at the snake around his shoulders, "Nah, this guy's poisonous. Well, venomous is the correct term for-"Dean paled, "What?""Yeah. He just doesn't tend to bite.""I've spent the last month in close quarters with a poisonous snake that 'doesn't tend to bite'?!""That’s about right.""You two are perfectly strange," Bobby chimed in."Yeah, well, my brother is nothing if not strange," Dean remarked."Hey!" Sam frowned."Look at the giant snake around your shoulders and rethink that 'hey!'" Dean snorted.Sam made a face before turning back to the book and saying, "You say that, but you're practically a Disney princess, all the birds you attract.""Don't disrespect the princesses! Those girls clean all day and what thanks do they get, huh?" “Aw, the birds do all the work!”Dean looked over at his sparrow, “Well, Bird over here sure doesn’t.”Sam laughed, and Dean got up."I don't know about you, but I am going to make myself a sandwich.""Good for you," Sam nodded.Dean crossed into the other room, opened the fridge, and gathered sandwich ingredients in his arms. He kicked the door closed, a song playing in his head as he started to assemble the sandwich."Dean!" Came a voice from the other room.He leaned over to the doorframe so he'd be visible to Sam and Bobby, "Yeah?""Hm?" Sam looked up."You called me?""No.""I distinctly heard somebody say my name.""...Nobody called you," Sam frowned."I swear, one of you said my name.""Dean!" Came the voice again. Now Dean was sure it wasn't Sam's or Bobby's voice."There it is! There it is again!""The bird?" Bobby asked.Sam cut in now, shutting down his laptop and getting up, “You feeling alright?”"No! I mean- yes, I’m fine, but I know someone said my name!" Dean looked around almost frantically before turning to the bird."Hello, Dean," It said, catching Dean completely off guard, "It's good to finally talk to you.""The bird is talking," Dean paled."The bird is what now?" Sam knit his eyebrows, "Seriously, dude, are you okay?""The bird is talking!""Birds don't talk!""Oh, jee, thanks, I didn't know!" Dean yelled, "Why can't you hear him?!""Why can you?! " Sam said, standing up so quickly that the snake almost fell off of his shoulders, which it didn't look too happy about. It hissed at him. Sam's eyes widened and he slowly diverted his attention to the snake, "What?"It hissed again. Sam's reaction to that was to throw it across the room."What is happening right now?!" Bobby yelled."Are you hearing it talk?" Dean asked, talking over the bird."Yeah," Sam was eyeing the thing out of the corner of its eye. “That’s not normal animal behavior.”Dean stared at the bird like it was going to attack, “You’re telling me.”--“Good Lord, Dean, you need to calm down a bit, or we’ll never get anywhere,” The bird chirped.“What are you talking about? How can you talk? Better yet, who even are you?” Dean asked in quick succession, sort of whisper-yelling, because while this was going on, Sam was asking roughly the same questions to his snake, who apparently was also a big talker. Bobby was just sort of staring at them both, looking incredibly confused.“I’m Michael,” The bird answered curtly, “Can we take this somewhere with less people? And snakes?”Dean could almost swear that the bird was staring down Sam, if birds could do that. He was, to put it bluntly, in disbelief. Dean had seen a lot, but this was weird, “I have a bird named Mike.”“Michael. Another room, perhaps?” The bird was hopping around a bit, like birds do, but somehow with the implication of impatience.“How do I know I can trust you?” Dean questioned. He wasn’t sure whether he should get out his gun. Shooting a talking bird named Mike at point-blank range with a handgun, in Bobby’s living room, somehow felt like a strange thing to do.“Ye of little faith,” The bird shook his head, “Well, if nothing else, I can tell you about the apocalypse. Isn’t that worth a bit of trust?”Dean didn’t really know what to make of that. Again, this was a bird saying that, “Uh, Bobby? Imma take whatever this conversation is into the other room, ‘kay? Uh… Be on lookout. Full disclosure, I have no idea what’s happening.”“Uh huh,” Bobby nodded, but he was looking over at Sam, concerned. Dean looked from the bird to Sam. As much as instinct said stay, something else said listen to what the bird had to say.--“Don’t you know it’s rude to throw people?” The snake remarked, shaking itself.“You’re not a people,” Sam replied, “What are you?”“Okay, fine, I’m not a people. I’m a snake. Whatever. Anyway, great that we’re finally getting to talking! I’m Luci,” The snake introduced, slithering up a table leg, probably so Sam wouldn’t be looking down quite so much.“...I really don’t mean to judge, but your voice is very masculine, so-” Sam shook his head, “That’s not the point. You’re a talking snake!”“I do use he and him, yes, and Luci is short for something. But no, I’m not a talking snake. I’m not really talking.”Sam took an exasperated breath, “I’m going insane, aren’t I?”“Nope. Thing is, pally, snakes literally do not have the vocal ability to talk, and even if I could, I don’t want the room hearing me. We’re not in the best company, see-” The snake, Luci apparently, jabbed its’ tail over at Dean’s bird, Dean also talking with it in hushed tones like Sam was with the snake, “And even if not for him, you’re the only one who really needs to hear me, Sammy.”“What, now?”“What say you we do some learning?”“What, now?” Sam repeated.The snake clicked his tongue, if snakes could, and said, “Don’t tell me you aren’t curious about the apocalypse, Samshine.”At this point, Dean said something to Bobby, but Sam was too busy with his reply to the snake that he didn’t even care to hear what, “You know who else said that? Ruby. And look how that went. Not just bad for me, but for the world, in case you’ve forgotten. Why should I trust you?”The snake sighed, once again baffling Sam in the ‘how’ department, and said, like he was trying to place the name, “Ruby, Ruby, Ruby… Oh. Ruby. Yeah, I’ve heard of her. Trust me, Ruby and I aren’t a thing alike.”“Didn’t the devil appear to Eve as a snake?” Sam asked now.“Oh, don’t get Biblical on me, Sammy. A whole ton of the cooler polytheistic gods had snakes as symbols. Hermes.”“Loki,” Sam countered.“Quetzalcoatl. Just saying, don’t judge the whole species by a handful of creeps. I’m not like those guys. And even if snakes were inherently evil, so are demons, and psychics, huh? But you’re a psychic with demon blood. The exception. Maybe I’m an exception too.”Sam wasn’t sure that he himself was so exceptional, but he still said, “...Okay. Go on.”
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Michael was perched on the nightstand in Bobby’s spare bedroom, occasionally preening a wing or looking about the room. Dean sat down hard on the bed, mind swimming.“Okay, what the Hell?” Dean questioned.“Well,” The bird began, looking Dean in the eye best as it could, having one eye on each side of its face, “To get right to the matter, I’d say that it all began when my father said, ‘Let there be light.’ It took seven days for the-”“Are you seriously about to recite all of Genesis right now?”Michael ruffled his feathers as he stood a little straighter, “Of course not! I just like to give the proper context, considering that-”“Wait, wait, wait.” Dean frowned, readjusting himself, “You just said ‘My father’ in reference to God.” Dean had never known any birds to do that, but to be fair, he’d never really known any birds to do anything. Who he did remember doing that, however, was… “I’ve only heard Angels say that.”Michael looked pleased, “Well, I am an Angel. Glad you noticed.”“You’re an Angel,” Dean deadpanned, “In a bird’s body.”“Yes, unfortunately. Quite the turn of events.”Dean thought on this for a second. Didn’t Angels need permission from their vessel? How’d a bird give that? Cas and Zachariah and all the other dicks with wings drove the latest model, so why would this one show up in a bird? Then, two dots out of the many managed to connect. An Angel named…Dean stared, “You’re Michael. The Archangel.”The bird would have smiled if it could, “I am indeed.”“Why are you a bird?” Dean got up and started to pace. Lots was happening and he didn’t love it.Here, the bird probably would have sucked his teeth- he really was missing having a broader spectrum of facial expression, “Until the apocalypse comes, and my true vessel agrees to host me, I am stuck in this kind of body, unable to interact with humans.”“We’re interacting right now.” Dean stated the obvious, mind swimming. He felt a bit sick, if he was honest. The apocalypse was meant to be a big showdown between Michael and Lucifer, you know, the apocalypse that Dean had been doing everything he could to prevent. But if Michael was here, on Earth, could that… Could that mean that the apocalypse couldn’t be stopped? Dean shook his head. No. He was the Righteous Man, the Angels had said, who would stop it. He had to stop it, whether or not he really was ‘righteous.’“Yes, we are. I’ve always been around to keep you safe, so why should I stop now that the apocalypse is coming up?”“What?”“I don’t want my vessel getting hurt. I care about you, Dean.”Dean blinked. Vessel? He was… “No.”The bird looked disappointed, “Dean, I promise you I mean nothing but-”“No! Screw you and screw the apocalypse!” Dean wrenched open the door and marched back towards the other room, Michael flying after him. Dean flashed a gesture that relied heavily on his middle finger, and Michael squawked indignantly.--The snake stretched, looking bored, “So, you’re ready to listen to me?”Sam pursed his lips, “Start talking and we’ll see whether what you say is worth listening to.”“Well, the apocalypse. I can help you stop it.”Sam raised his eyebrows, “Okay, that’s worth listening to.”“How it works is pretty simple. The seals are all broken- because you killed Lilith- so now the whole thing’s got its rear in gear, yeah?”“Yeah,” Sam probably looked very embarrassed and guilty, but the snake didn’t address it.“Well, that doesn’t mean it’s a done deal just yet.”“Right, because the Archangels still have to duke it out.”“Well, Angels need permission to take a body, and only some people’s bodies are good enough for them, right? Well, Archangels are even more specific about who they wear to the prom.”“Meaning?”“Meaning there’s two poor souls who don’t even know that they are the vessels of the apocalypse, and they’re just roaming around out there doing who knows what. What’s more, I can tell you who.” The snake looked smug to have been of use, but Sam wasn’t done talking yet.“So if we killed them? Would that stop it?” He questioned. He could feel Bobby’s eyes boring into his back. Right, he could only hear one side of the conversation. The snake’s answer was cut off, however, by Dean storming towards them, yelling at his bird.“-This is stupid, you’re stupid, and this whole thing is bullshit!” He swatted at the bird, but it didn’t even peck him.“Dean, what’s going on?!” Bobby was clearly thinking that he’d stuck with the wrong Winchester brother.Dean punctuated each word of his answer by swatting at the bird, “Archangels are huge dicks!”“What?!”Dean eventually gave it a rest as the bird landed on top of a dusty bookshelf. He gestured at the bird. “Say hello to the Archangel Michael. Yes, the very same.”Dean kept talking, but Sam didn’t quite hear it. Dean’s bird was the Archangel Michael. Sam shot a glance back at the snake, which was now quite comfortably sitting in one of Bobby’s armchairs. Luci was short for something… Oh, shit, shit, shit.Dean was almost ranting now, “-And maybe the best part is that he thinks for some goddamn reason, that I-”“Dean?” Sam asked, carefully watching the snake, which stared back at him, “I think we might have a bigger problem.”“A bigger problem than Michael? The apocalypse Michael?” Dean questioned. Sam hated to pile on, but…“Uh, yeah, I’d say bigger. If that’s Michael,” Sam proposed, trying to keep his cool, “Then this snake here is…”Something seemed to dawn on Dean. His eyes flicked between Sam and the snake, “No.”Sam looked back at the snake, “I think we’ve found a lead on the apocalypse.”Suddenly Dean looked pale, murmuring to himself what sounded like a long string of curses, running his hands through his hair, “It’s one thing to… Oh, shit, I don’t think…”Bobby knit his eyebrows, coming back into the conversation, sounding very clearly concerned and very confused, but saying it like a fact, “You figured something out.”Dean sunk into a nearby chair. What are you supposed to do when you find out you’ve been sharing a roof with Evil Incarnate? But somehow that didn’t seem like Dean’s biggest worry.Dean picked up an open beer from the table next to him- probably his, maybe not- and drained it. “Michael’s been tailing me to keep me safe. Because I’m his vessel. Lucifer…”Sam looked down at the snake that had been there for so long, since he was a kid really, and it dawned on him what Dean was saying.“You’re Lucifer’s vessel.”