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Steve reaches blindly for another beer in the cool box next to his deck chair. His hands find an ice cold beer under his fingers and he smiles, wrapping his hand around the glass and bringing it up to his lips. His eyes are far too busy watching his PA swimming through his tinted wayfarers. That’s the good thing about his sunglasses, if he keeps his head still, how would anyone know that he’s watching Bucky’s beautifully sculpted body doing laps up and down the pool.The sun is beating down on them both, and Steve knows it is turning his hair even more golden than usual. He’s slathered in sun cream, and trying to stay in the shade, but the sun has moved, and his view of the pool is too good to move from. Eventually Bucky will get out, and then Steve will have to look away. Will move into the shade. Because though he likes to indulge himself, he doesn’t want Bucky to think he’s a pervert. Even though he clearly is.Steve takes another gulp of his beer. Bucky hauls himself out of the side of the pool and Steve focuses his eyes forward, forces them on the horizon that’s just in the distance. On the idyllic azure waters of the Mexican Caribbean. He hears Bucky go over to the shower at the side of the pool.“Hey boss,” Bucky calls from the shower.Steve is allowed to look over now. He gulps down more beer at the sight. Of Bucky, muscles tense from swimming, standing under the water and pushing back his long hair. He’s wearing navy long swimming trunks and Steve has never cursed an item of clothing for existing more. He tries not to stare at that delicious trail of hair on Bucky’s stomach that he would just kill to run his nose down.Guh. Is the only word Steve’s brain produces.“Yeah?” Steve calls back.“You’re gonna burn, it’s 35 out here!”Steve nods and stands from the deck chair and walks over to Bucky, beer swinging in his hand. The tiles are warm beneath his bare feet and Steve sighs in relief. He knew this trip was a good idea. The unrelenting cold of the New York winter was bringing him down. He needed some sun. Some warmth.“Might take a walk down the beach,” he says.Bucky nods, stepping out from the shower and pushing the water out of his hair, ringing it out at the back.Bucky grabs a towel to dry his face. He looks ruffled, his hair a mess and his eyebrows scuffed and Steve just would love to bite down on his shoulder. Mess that wet hair up some more. Watch it drip down in his face as Bucky rides him.“You want me to fix you lunch for when you get back?”“Mm, yeah, that’d be great.”“You want tacos again, or you bored of tacos?” Bucky slings the towel round his shoulders.Steve grins.“Never bored of tacos.”“Yes boss,” Bucky gives him a mock salute, a wink, and walks back into the villa.Steve hears the door close and groans quietly to himself. He needs to get a grip. He walks down to the gate that leads to the beach.Bucky is the best PA he’s ever had. He is not ruining it by hitting on him. He can’t. Bucky had been hired in his mind the second he stepped into the interview. He’d been wearing a smart blue button down, grey slacks, and polished black shoes. He’d had his hair combed back, his blue eyes shining out, and Steve had all but fell in love at the first smile Bucky had given him.He shouldn’t have hired someone he found so attractive. He did understand that. But...Bucky had also got a great resume and came highly recommended from Tony Stark and well. Tony wasn’t an easy man to impress. Bucky interviewed well, Steve liked him, he was funny, and God knew Steve could use some humour in his life after his mother had passed away and Peggy had left him.He was the perfect PA, he kept Steve organised, but didn’t make him feel rushed or crowded. He learned Steve’s routine, habits, favourites, preferences, within days, and had soon organised his schedule within an inch of it’s life, making sure Steve always had time to rest.He was perfect. Steve shook his head at himself as he walked down the stone path to the beach.Don’t ruin everything Steve. Don’t do it.The villa has a private strip of beach, and Steve smiles as he curls his toes in the warm sand. He stands and watches the water for a while, finishing his drink, trying not to think of Bucky. That trail of hair. That smile.God. This is hopeless. Maybe he should have insisted on going on holiday alone. But Bucky said he’d never been to Mexico, always wanted to go, was sick of the cold too. Steve couldn’t bear to leave him at home.Bucky had slept on Steve’s shoulder the whole way there, despite the first class seating and complimentary drink service. The flight attendant had smiled knowingly at them. Likely assuming they were a couple. Steve would be so lucky.He walks into the water till the waves hit his knees, happy in the sun, but well aware he’ll burn if he stays there any longer.He makes his way back towards the house.The aircon is a pleasant relief after he’s made it up the hill to the house. Bucky is making tortillas with something amazing smelling in a pan on the side and humming to himself. He’s changed into another pair of shorts but hadn’t bothered putting a top on. His hair is still mostly wet.Steve tries not to bite his lip. To ask him very nicely if he could have him for dessert after those tacos. God. His back. It isn’t normal to find someone’s back this attractive. He can see it under him as he rides him.Jesus.Control yourself Steve.“You want a Marg?” Bucky asks.“God yes.”*Steve is lying in bed staring at the ceiling. For some reason the idea that they are in next door bedrooms is driving Steve crazy. He’s said goodnight to Bucky on the landing and they’d walked into their separate rooms. This is nothing new. Bucky goes everywhere with Steve, especially on business trips, and they often have rooms next to each other. Tonight it feels different. He thinks maybe because they are all alone together in the house.He reads for a while, trying to push his thoughts in another direction. He gives up. Closes his eyes and lets his thoughts drift to Bucky, of him under the spray of the shower, head tilted back and neck exposed and –  He hears a blood curdling scream from next door. He is out of bed and into Bucky’s room before he can remember he’s only wearing his boxers. He flicks on the light.Bucky is lying in bed, covered in sweat, thrashing in the sheets, and screaming.Steve blinks, paralysed for a second and unsure what to do. He grabs Bucky’s shoulders and shakes him hard.“Bucky! Bucky! Wake up!”Bucky’s eyes snap open, he stares at Steve without recognition, and Steve yells as Bucky grabs the back of his head and puts a knife to his throat.“Bucky!”Bucky jerks awake, blinks in confusion and then horror as he realises what he’s done. He immediately releases Steve’s head and puts the knife back on the table.“Steve! Oh my god I’m so sorry, are you okay?” His eyes fly over Steve, his hands on his shoulders, checking him for damage.“Uh... I’m fine,” Steve manages once he’d come back to himself and got air back into his lungs.“Oh shit I’m so sorry,” Bucky covers his face with his hands, hyperventilating.“It’s fine, it’s fine, I think you were having a nightmare.” Steve tentatively puts his hand to Bucky’s shoulder. “Breathe. Hey, look at me.”Bucky lowers his hands enough so Steve can see his eyes.“Breathe.”Bucky does. He leans into Steve and Steve wraps his arms round him without hesitation. Bucky’s chest is heaving.“I’m so sorry.”“It’s fine. It’s fine.” Steve soothes.He sits down on the edge of Bucky’s bed before he topples on top of him. Bucky releases him and bends over double, his face on Steve’s thighs. Steve strokes Bucky’s back for lack of any other ideas, thankfully not having any inappropriate thoughts this time.Bucky’s breathing eventually stills and he looks back up at Steve again from Steve’s lap.  “Shit. Am I fired?”“What? Don’t be ridiculous.”Bucky sits up so he was level with Steve again.“I put a knife to your throat.”“Not deliberately.” Steve looks at the flick knife that currently sits on Bucky’s bedside table. “But, um, why do you have a knife by your bed?”Bucky open and closes his mouth.“Old habit,” Bucky says eventually.“Uhuh.” Steve raises an eyebrow.“I’m so fired.”“You’re not fired. Stop saying that. What is this, like, PTSD?”Bucky nods and looks back down in Steve’s lap.“Sorry, I…I should have told you. It’s not really a problem so much anymore though. I did the therapy thing, did the medication thing, and mostly I’m okay just sometimes.” He shrugs. “I’m sorry.”He looks ashamed and it is killing Steve.“You don’t have to apologise.” They’re sat knee to knee on the bed.Steve pulls Bucky to him again, hoping it was okay, hoping it might help.Bucky wraps his arms around him, burying his head in his neck. Steve strokes the back of his hair. Rests his chin on the top of Bucky’s head.“I don’t know much about your past, do I?”“Nope.”Bucky doesn’t elaborate and Steve laughs.“Okay.”“What time is it? Did I wake you up?” Bucky asks.“Nah I was reading. It’s only midnight.”Only then Steve remembers that they are both mostly naked and he is basically holding Bucky in his arms. He doesn’t want Bucky to think he is taking advantage of him, but Bucky is still holding him hard. Steve carries on stroking his hair.“I’m so sorry about the knife thing.”“Clearly I’m pissed about it as you can tell.”Bucky laughs a warm huff against his shoulder.Bucky smells fucking amazing. Steve needs to leave. This is inappropriate. Bucky is vulnerable and tired.Steve goes to pull away but Bucky makes a noise deep in his chest that makes him stop.“Sorry,” Bucky says again. “You can go I’m sorry I’m being ridiculous I…it’s not your job to look after me.”Steve strokes a hand down Bucky’s back and he relaxes against him again.“You want me to stay?” Steve asks quietly.“You don’t have to I –““Not what I asked, Buck.”Bucky nods.“I’d feel safer.” It’s so quiet Steve only just makes it out.“Okay come on.” He turns off the light, then guides Bucky back into bed and lays down next to him on the crisp white sheets. The bed is a king-size and Bucky lays on his side facing away from him. Steve lays on his back, his hand on Bucky’s arm for comfort.They lay there silently for a few minutes before Bucky puts his hand on Steve’s hand and pulls him closer.“You want -?” Steve starts.“Yes.”Steve gulps, turns over and pulls Bucky into him. Bucky sighs in relief, holding Steve’s hand tight against his chest. Coarse hair brushes Steve’s fingers. Steve tosses a leg over Bucky’s automatically then panics that he’s gone too far, but it just earns him another happy noise. Bucky’s naked skin against his, his weight, his warmth, his hair in his face. Steve feels warm.“Sorry. I know this is weird,” Bucky says.“It’s fine. Is it helping?” Steve declines to tell him it’s one of the best things he’s ever felt.“It is, but it’s weird.”“Okay, it’s weird. But I don’t care, so get some rest,” Steve says.Bucky relents and closes his eyes, letting Steve hold him. His body relaxes and Steve instinctively kisses him on the shoulder before he realises what he’s doing. Bucky doesn’t react, Steve hopes he’s already asleep.Steve focuses all his energy on going to sleep and not getting hard. Nope. Not happening and not appropriate.He wonders about Bucky, as they lay there together in the dark, about who the hell keeps a knife next to their bed and could get someone like Steve into a headlock that easily. Steve isn’t small. Not that he had resisted. But still though. Steve is taller, broader than Bucky. He likes to work out. Bucky fits perfectly into his arms as his little spoon. He tries desperately to think back to Bucky’s resume. Steve definitely read it before the interview, but all he remembers from that day was those eyes, that smile, how good Bucky had looked in that god damn suit.
“James Barnes?” Steve had asked as he’d opened the door to his office. Bucky had been sitting outside in his suit, looking quietly confident. He had long dark hair, but it was brushed back, neatly trimmed. Clean shaven. Bright eyes. He’d looked like a man that could organise Steve’s life and his many many meetings that happened all over the states, sometimes all over the world.

“Call me Bucky, please, yes, hi, nice to meet you.” He had shook his hand. Steve had been smitten. He had led Bucky into his office, offered him a seat in the leather executive chair that sat opposite Steve’s. He looked good in it. Looked like he belonged there.

Steve had looked over his resume as they’d chatted. Asked relevant questions about his previous jobs. His current PA who was retiring had made Bucky a cup of coffee. She’s given him a once over too and gave Steve an approving nod.
Bucky worked for Tony Stark before. And anyone who could survive being that maniacs PA deserved a medal. Before that Steve remembers seeing some other PA jobs. No idea what he’d majored in. By that time he’d probably got lost in Bucky’s eyes. For god’s sake Steve.He guesses he was ex-army, maybe? That is probably the most appealing answer. Less appealing is gang member, thug, gun for hire? He looks down at the man asleep in his arms. But what could you possibly tell by looking at someone about who they used to be. Steve guesses it doesn’t really matter. He is still the best PA he’s ever had, stupidly gorgeous, and it turns out very nice to cuddle. He has a feeling they wouldn’t speak about this in the morning.Steve falls asleep trying to imagine Bucky in different lives. In different uniforms. A cadet. A cop. A thug, with a balaclava over his head. An assassin, dressed all in black. Hands sliding over a sniper rifle.*At some point in the night Bucky has turned over and is now lying almost nose to nose with Steve. Steve blinks his eyes open, trying to remember what the hell is going on. It has been a long time since he’s woken up next to someone. Despite his friends’ constant, valiant, attempts to set him up with anyone even vaguely suitable.It’s still dark, and Steve tries to work out what has woken him up. Then Bucky rolls his hips against him, holding him close, arms locked around his back, and hmms under his breath. That probably explains it. And Steve’s growing erection. Steve’s eyes adjust and he can make out Bucky’s closed eyes. He can feel Bucky’s hardening cock against his leg. He freezes. He has to get out of here. This is not okay for him to be awake whilst Bucky is not. Bucky rolls his hips against Steve’s, a rumbling sound in his chest again. He does it again and gasps, his eyes snapping open. Steve has nowhere to look but straight into them.“Uh, sorry, I, think you were having a good dream.”“Oh god.” Bucky closes his eyes. “Is this better or worse than the knife thing?”“I do not know how to answer that,” Steve says.Bucky laughs despite the situation, but Steve realises neither of them have attempted to move away. In fact, Bucky is putting his head on Steve’s shoulder again, avoiding his eyes.“This is why I said you shouldn’t run for senator, you’re too honest.”Steve laughs.“Bucky…” he feels like he should say something. Anything. About the lines they are happily crossing without any commentary or clarification.“Mmm?” Bucky looks up at him.Bucky licks his lips nervously and Steve’s dick jumps against Bucky’s leg. Bucky doesn’t say anything but keeps his hands on Steve’s waist and rolls his hips again.Steve closes his eyes and rocks right back. Bucky moans and it is the best sound Steve has ever heard in his life. They keep rocking, till they are panting against each other’s necks.Steve decides if he keeps his eyes closed, and it’s dark, and they don’t say anything, that maybe this is okay. If they don’t touch with their hands. If they just move and don’t touch and maybe they just won’t talk about it in the morning -Bucky moves his hand down. His thumb runs down the inside of Steve’s hip. Steve gulps in a breath.“Buck…I…this isn’t a good idea.”Bucky wraps his hand round Steve’s now painfully hard dick.Steve gasps.“I thought you said I always had good ideas, boss?” Bucky’s voice is lower than Steve has ever heard it, talking straight in Steve’s ear, and Steve’s brain whites out.“Oh fuck.”Bucky raises his eyebrows at him and strokes Steve’s dick. He keeps grinding his own dick up against Steve’s thigh. It feels too damn good.“Fuck! Bucky this isn’t a good idea.”“You know Tony keeps saying you need to get laid. I think he’s right. Look at you. You’re so strung out.”Steve is trying not to shake in Bucky’s arms, pleasure melting away all his rational thoughts about why they absolutely should not do this. They aren’t even drunk to use that as an excuse.“It’s just a hand job, boss. People get them all the time from their PAs.”“Do they?!” Steve splutters.“They do off the good ones.” Bucky winks at him and the last of Steve’s rationality dissolves.“Fuck. Buck.”“It’s okay, boss, you just relax, you’re so tense, relax, I got you. You know I’ve always got you. Let me do this for you. You were so good to me last night. Let me be good to you now.”He runs a hand down Steve’s back, his lips moving down Steve’s neck.“You don’t have…you don’t have to you don’t owe me anything I…”“Shh, relax. I know. I want to.”Bucky’s mouth is hot, his teeth sharp and his lips soft and Steve. Steve is losing it.“Bucky, Buck…oh my god. That’s so good.”“Yeah you like it boss? Am I doing it right?” he purrs in Steve’s ear.“Oh my god, don’t start that.” It’s making Steve’s dick harder.“Am I good, boss?” He looks up at Steve with deliberately big eyes.“Yes, Christ, you gotta stop doing that voice or I’m gonna come all over you.”Bucky chuckles in his ear.“Steve, I gotta tell you, I know you’ve been desperate for this since I walked in your door. Enjoy it.”Steve cringes.“You think I don’t see you looking?”Steve cheeks are scarlet. He is blushing all the way down his neck.“Shit, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to I swear I’m not a pervert I - .”“Steve. Shut up.” The voice is firm in his ear and Steve groaned. “Close your eyes.”Steve does as he’s told.“Good. Now relax. You’re lying on that beach outside. On your sun lounger. And I’m stroking this gorgeous cock because I want it. Because I love it. Because I want you to fuck me over the sun lounger. I want you to fuck me face down on the tiles. I want it in the shower. I want it here. I want it over the kitchen counter. I want your dick buried so deep in me I never forget it and – “Steve shouts as he cums, nails digging into Bucky’s back.Bucky smirks at him.“Oh fuck this.” Steve shakes his head and stops resisting every urge that screaming through his body. He slams Bucky back on the bed, slides down him and takes his dick in his mouth.“Fuck! Steve!” Bucky is looking down on Steve in surprise as he sucks Bucky hard.He gulps him down, revelling in the noises Bucky is making, the way he’s grabbing his head, his shoulders, desperately, nails scraping. He slides his lips, flicks out his tongue over the head, then gulps him right back down again to the back of his throat. Easily swallowing him down.“Steve! Fuck!” Bucky is not trying even remotely to be quiet, and Steve loves it.Steve’s hands are under Bucky’s lower back, fingers spread, holding him firm as he sucks him.“Steve, oh my god. You…fuck.”It’s so long since he’s done this, and Bucky is just perfect. His cock is heavy and thick in his mouth, his thighs strong and clenching, that hair running up his stomach.He can’t resist it, he licks a finger and slides it in between Bucky’s legs, pushes it inside him. He has never wanted anyone like he wants Bucky in this fucking moment.“Steve!”Steve curls his finger, pushes.“Steve! Fuck! Yes!” He’s sure Bucky’s shouts are making the room vibrate. Making his brain vibrate.He’s coming in Steve’s mouth and Steve gulps it down greedily, along with every moan and yell that Bucky lets out shamelessly.Steve looks up. Bucky is propped up on his elbows, covered in a sheen of sweat, panting, and staring down at Steve in surprise.Steve cleans them both up without talking, glances at the clock, then lays back down in the bed. Bucky is still breathless. He pulls Bucky back to him. Thinking it’s far too late to be thinking about damage control.“Tony said he thought you were a virgin.”Steve snorts a laugh.“It’s 3am. Go back to sleep,” Bucky says.Steve closes his eyes and passes out.*

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

The smell of bacon and eggs wakes Steve, and he blinks his eyes open at the bright sunlight coming in through the open curtains. He’s confused why he’s not in his own bed, why he doesn’t have his phone, his water…when he sees Bucky’s suitcase and remembers.Oh no. He’s in Bucky’s bed. He winces. He’s pathetic. Who shags their PA? Or almost shags his PA. It’s so cliché.He notices the knife is gone off the bedside table. For a mad moment he thinks about searching through Bucky’s things for a clue about who he used to be but manages to rationalise before he does anything crazy. He stands. Trying to calm himself.“Steve, coffee! Come on. Taxis coming in twenty minutes!”Steve curses, it’s so early, but the familiar command grounds him and he goes back to his room, pulls on his cargo shorts and white tank top that Bucky has left laid out for him ready to go. He grabs his phone and shoves it in his pocket, runs down the stone stairs of the villa and into the kitchen.Bucky slides a plate of bacon, eggs, and pancakes to him. An iced coffee is already waiting for him on the table. There is nothing different in Bucky’s manner to show last night even happened. Steve wonders if he dreamt the whole thing. Or maybe just the bit after Bucky’s nightmare.“You know you’re on holiday too, I don’t have any work appointments or anything, so you don’t have to run round after me.” Steve still gulps down the coffee gratefully.Bucky smiles at him in amusement.“Yeah, is that why you were all ready to go for our excursion today and you set your alarm, and got everything ready the night before?”Steve looks over to the door. A backpack is sitting ready packed, with what Steve imagines is water, sun cream, hat, sunglasses, map, tickets, wallet, snacks, and a battery pack for Steve’s phone if it runs out. Next to it are Steve’s sandals.Steve concedes Bucky a smile.“Thank you.”“You’re welcome. You know I love and take pride in keeping my favourite Tamagotchi alive.”Steve rolls his eyes but shuts up and eats his breakfast.The breakfast is perfect as always. Steve had never worked out how Bucky gets the eggs so perfect. He’s watched him enough times, and practices when he’s alone at the weekend, but it’s never the same.“These are amazing.”“Thanks,” Bucky says breezily, already washing up the pan and cleaning up the kitchen.Steve watches him, shamelessly now. Though apparently he wasn’t subtle about doing it before. Bucky’s wearing dark blue linen shorts and a grey tank top. He’s pulled his hair back into a band like he does sometimes when he’s cooking. Steve likes to watch for the moment when he pulls it out when he’s done, and his dark hair falls on his shoulders.“It’s a 2 hour journey, go to the bathroom.”Steve finishes his breakfast and does as he’s told. Bucky is always right. Steve pays him to be.By the time Steve is done in the bathroom the kitchen is pristine and Bucky is standing by the door stepping into his sandals. His hair is already down. Damn it.Steve has no idea what to do with what happened last night apart from pretend it didn’t happen. Real mature, Steve.It’s 7 am and it’s already heating up outside. The taxi pulls up and sounds its horn. Steve puts on his shoes and slings the bag onto his shoulder. They lock the door behind them, and Steve follows Bucky out to the taxi. Steve gets in (air con, thank god) and Bucky chats to the man in Spanish that Steve doesn’t understand, showing him a ticket. They’re both nodding, which is encouraging.Bucky slides in the back next to Steve.“All ready to go see this exciting pyramid?” Steve asks a little bit more sarcastically than he meant to. This excursion had been Bucky’s idea.“Boss,” Bucky groans as he does up his seat belt, “it’s one of 7th wonders of the world.”“Uhuh,” Steve said, smiling at Bucky, trying not to say something horribly cheesy about Bucky being one of the wonders of the world. Steve is all the surer of it since he got the chance to have his hands all over him last night.Steve yawns at the thought of all the sleep he didn’t get last night.The driver says something to Bucky in Spanish over his shoulder and Bucky agrees.“When did you learn Spanish?” Steve asks, thinking about how Bucky said he’d never been to Mexico before.“Oh, work thing, a while ago.” Bucky shrugs it off.Steve wonders if he’s got his knife in one of the pockets of his cargo shorts. He wonders if he carries a gun, and Steve’s just never noticed before.He remembers thinking the five languages on Bucky’s resume were impressive, but never thought why he might know them.“and the Russian, German, and...” Steve tried to remember them all.“Chinese and French. I like languages,” Bucky says, and then repeats it in what Steve imagines is five different languages.The taxi driver laughs.Bucky smiles.“I’m gonna have a nap. I really didn’t sleep well last night,” Bucky says.Steve opens his mouth then closes it again. Bucky smirks at him and closes his eyes.Steve watches the road for a while, then the sound of Bucky’s rhythmic breathing sends him off as well.He wakes with a jerk as the car pulls to a stop. He blinks through his sunglasses at the bright world flooding into the taxi.Bucky’s already chatting to the taxi driver, giving him some dollars, nodding, and pointing to where Steve guesses the guy will pick them up later.Bucky opens the door for Steve and Steve climbs out, about to tell Bucky off for waiting on him when he’s not working.“Habit,” Bucky says before Steve can say it.Steve smiles and raises and eyebrow. It is 10 am but the sun is already enough for Bucky to tell Steve to turn round so he can get the sun cream out the pack.He makes and immediately hides a squeal as Bucky slaps cool sun cream on the back of his neck. Bucky laughs behind him.“Its cold,” Bucky tells him helpfully as he rubs it down Steve’s arms.“Thanks,” Steve says sarcastically. Bucky rubs it into his shoulders, under the straps of the tank. He whirls Steve round and does the front of his neck. Steve deliberately avoids eye contact, looking over at the path through the trees to the clearing ahead.He could lean forward and kiss him. So easy. Stop it Steve. Bucky hands the sun cream to Steve. He makes quick work of making sure Bucky’s perfect skin is protected and they follow the other tourists down the path.There’s another couple ahead of them, holding hands, and Steve feels a lurch of jealousy. As if reading his mind Bucky moves closer to him but unfortunately just shows him the map that he’s pulled out of the backpack.“So, Steve,” he says patronisingly, giving him a cheeky smile. “You see its more than just a pyramid. It’s the ruins of a whole Mayan city.”Steve nods and looks down at the map.“I can see that. Is that the cafe?” He’s just doing it to annoy him. Steve does have a vague interest in history. Or at least impressive Mayan history that won’t take too long to walk round.Bucky sighs.“It’s a wonder of the world, you’re not sitting it out in the cafe.”Steve grins back at him and is sure he sees Bucky falter for a second. Urgh. He wished he’d have kissed him last night. It’s probably never going to happen again. The one-time deal. He should have taken it whilst he had the chance. Now he just has the memory of Bucky running his teeth down his neck.“Steve!”“Huh?” “There’s a queue, you can’t just walk in.” Bucky is rolling his eyes at him and pulling him into a queue.“Oh yeah.”Bucky shakes his head.“I don’t know how you ever survived without me.”“Me neither,” Steve smirks at him and is sure he’s imagining the sharp intake of breath from Bucky.They reach the front of the queue and Bucky hands over their tickets, speaking Spanish again. The lady on the booth smiles warmly at him and Steve wonders if there’s anyone Bucky couldn’t charm. Maybe a jaguar.The trees open into a clearing and Steve looks around the stone buildings.The next hour is spent with Bucky dragging Steve round by the arm, pointing at the Mayan ruins, point to his guidebook he’s brought along and taking pictures.“Stand there. I need one for your socials.”Steve groans as Bucky positions him in front of the pyramid. Bucky fusses with Steve’s hair, his sunglasses, and Steve has to try hard not to lean forward and kiss him whilst Bucky’s frowning at his hair like it’s a math problem.Bucky moves Steve’s posture, his head, his jaw. Anyone else Steve would have lost patience with by now. Fuck the socials. But Bucky...“Perfect. Stay there. Look down. No, actually, look at me. Tilt your chin up a bit.” Bucky looks at his pictures and frowns. He comes back up to Steve and is back right up in his personal space. Drags his teeth over Steve’s ear. He drops his voice.“Stevie.”It’s the exact voice he was using last night. It was one word, but it has its effect. Steve’s breath catches in his throat. Bucky leaps back and takes the shot and grins.“Yes!” He nods and drags Steve off to the next attraction.Steve is still coming back to himself when his phone starts pinging in his pocket. Socials notifications come vibrating into his phone.“Urgh,” Steve takes it out and puts it back on silent.“Your socials like the picture.” Bucky grins, clearly pleased with himself.Steve pauses as his brain catches up with him and he looks back from where they came from.“Wait, you’re telling me you’re not even allowed to climb on the pyramid?”“Of course not! It’s a historical artifact!” Bucky shakes his head at Steve in despair.“So what’s the point?” He’s deliberately winding him up, but Bucky deserves it for being so... So...urgh.Bucky stares at him for a moment then turns Steve round again. Steve thinks he’s about to take another picture when Bucky points back at the pyramid.“What’s the point? The point is that that huge pyramid was built in 400AD and still survives today! Look at it!” Bucky shakes the guidebook at him and points. “It’s incredible.”Steve nods dutifully. Bucky shakes his head at him again.It’s getting to the mid-day heat when finally, Bucky flakes out and they collapse in the cafe. Sweaty and tired from trekking round the place.They have a beer each and begin to cool down underneath the air con.“Don’t drink too much, we’re going swimming in the Cenote next,” Bucky says.“Isn’t that where they used to wash people before they sacrificed them?”Bucky blinks in the recognition that Steve has actually been listening to him.“Yes!”Steve smiles and swigs from his beer.“Did we even bring our trunks?” he asks.“Yes, obviously, they’re in the pack.” Bucky rolls his eyes.“Did you remember towels?”Bucky glares at him and Steve laughs.“Okay, okay.” Steve finishes his beer. “Let’s go swim in the murderous cenote.”“Then I can sacrifice you.”Steve laughs.“You wish. Then you’d be out of a job.”Bucky pulls a fake conceited face.“Well, you’re leaving it all to me, obviously.”“Knew I shouldn’t have left you in the office on your own with my desk unlocked.”Bucky laughs.“Please, boss, I know where you keep the keys.”“Good, cos I don’t.”They scrape back their chairs and Bucky laughs. Bucky gets the map back out and leads Steve down the road again until they reach another hive of activity around the cenote.It’s beautiful, if full of people, with turquoise waters sparkling in the sun.They change and Steve gets one glance at Bucky in those god damn swimming trunks again and resists the urge to knock him back onto the ground and shove his head inbetween his legs.Bucky’s slapping sun cream on him again, this time spreading it over Steve’s whole back, his sides, his chest that Steve could definitely do himself, running his fingers under the elastic of his trunks. The noise of the busy crowd fades and there is nothing but Bucky’s hands.Steve grits his teeth and takes the sun cream bottle back from Bucky to rub it into his chest. Bucky’s face is the picture of innocence as he looks up at him.Steve swears under his breath. He wonders if Bucky intends to spend the rest of their holiday/life winding him up. And how long Steve will be able to stand it before he breaks.Bucky turns to let Steve do his back. He moans appreciatively as Steve rubs it into his skin.“Tease,” Steve says before he can help it and Bucky’s whole-body shivers. Steve can’t help himself, he slides his hands round to Bucky’s stomach, leaning into him. They’re in public. He needs to stop.“Oh shit,” it’s the quietest whisper from Bucky. It reverberates through Steve’s body.Stop Steve.“Okay I think you’re done.” Steve wrenches himself back off Bucky’s body.“Could you tie back my hair? Like put it on the top of my head?” Bucky’s voice is normal again and he hands Steve the bobble.It’s a weird request, Bucky does it himself all the time. Steve wipes his hands on his shorts to wipe off the sun cream, then does as he’s told, running his hands through Bucky’s dark hair, pulling it up on top of Bucky’s head the best he can and putting it into a bun. He leans down and kisses Bucky on the back of the neck without thinking. He forgets he just slathered sun cream there.“Oh eurgh!”Bucky turns and laughs at the look on Steve’s face as he wipes his mouth.“You’re not supposed to eat it, Steve.”Steve glares at him and his stupid man bun that’s nowhere as neat as it is when Bucky does it himself.They leave their stuff in the lockers and slide into the cool water and the sun on their faces. Steve can almost forget the people around them, including the screaming kids. He closes his eyes and Bucky splashes him.“It’s nice, right boss?”“It’s beautiful,” Steve agrees.Bucky inexplicably gets his phone out of his pocket, encased in a plastic wrap.“Seriously?” Steve signs. “Where did you even get that cover from?”“Amazon. You look good wet.”“So do you.”Bucky laughs.“I know. Why do you think I like the pool so much? Lie back a little in the water. Close your eyes.”Steve rolls his eyes but has learnt it will all be over quicker if he does as he’s told. He leans back in the water, spreads his arms.“Yes, perfect, open your eyes, look up at the sky.”Steve does. A blue cloudless sky.“Perfect.”Steve wishes Bucky was talking to him and not the Instagram post.“Let’s take one together,” Steve suggests.“Yeah?”“Yeah, they’re holiday pictures, you’re making it look like I’m on holiday by myself.”“Okay, sure,” Bucky says after considering. He puts the phone in selfie and slides right in front of Steve, his back to Steve’s chest.Steve puts his arms round Bucky’s waist. Bucky sees himself in the camera.“Oh my god, Steve, what did you do to my hair?”“What’s wrong with it?”Bucky gives Steve a horrified look and Steve grabs the band and pulls it, like he’s been dying to the whole time they’ve worked together.He watches his hair fall and tries not to get hard.“Steve!” Bucky yells indignant as the end of his hair fall in the water.Bucky sighs and fusses over it.“Okay, get over it, come on,” he holds up the plastic encased phone.They both look up at the camera.Oh shit, Steve thinks, they look hot together. They look perfect together. He angles his head down into Bucky’s neck, skims his lips on Bucky’s neck and looks up, catching his blue eyes in the lens. It’s pornographic.Steve clicks the shutter button.Bucky shakes his head and bites his lip at the photo.“I cannot post that.”“Why not?”“You know why not. Image Steve. Image.”Steve pouts and pushes Bucky away.“Urgh fine. Come on. Let’s get out. My skins going wrinkly.”Bucky follows him back out the water and into one of the changing cubicles. Steve gulps. Bucky pushes off his shorts and stands there naked in front of Steve, making a show of drying off the ends of his hair and sighing.Steve drags his eyes up and down him. He pushes his own shorts off, towels himself dry. If it weren’t for the noise of so many others outside Steve would step in and –No. He wouldn’t. He’s a coward. He pulls his clothes back on.The taxi is waiting for the with perfect timing, and Steve has the overwhelming urge to pull Bucky to him and cuddle in the taxi. That’s even worse than sexual urges, he reminds himself.Bucky however sits in the middle seat, right next to him and Steve raises an eyebrow.“What? It’s two hours and you’re a great pillow. Perfect firmness.” He squeezes Steve’s shoulder and winks at him and nuzzling down on his chest. Steve has no choice but to put his arm around him and hold him tight.The butterflies. The butterflies in his stomach are way worse than the hard ons. He’s decided.Bucky falls asleep on him and Steve tries to keep as still as possible so Bucky can get some rest, even if he is an annoying idiot. He watches the world go by, the endless green trees on the side of the highway, and wonders how this is going to play out. Can they really keep playing this game for the rest of the holiday, or for the duration of Bucky’s employment?Eventually they make it home and Bucky wakes instantly as the car pulls to a halt. He gets out the car like he hasn’t been cuddling up to Steve the whole journey and pays the driver. Steve thanks him in Spanish, he can just about manage that, and walks back into the villa. He takes a deep breath.“Marg?” Bucky grins as he follows him in, dumping the backpack that Steve forgot about on the floor.“Yes. But my livers gonna start to dislike you.”Bucky laughs.“Hey, you’re on vacay, it doesn’t count,” Bucky says it in the most preppy voice he can manage.“Please never use that word again.”Bucky laughs.Steve goes to sit outside in the shade, and soon hears Bucky mixing their cocktails. Bucky brings them out in fancy glasses, complete with salt around the edge and lime slice, and pulls his sun lounger next to Steve’s.“Next time we do this we’re going all-inclusive and then you won’t be able to wait on me even if you want to,” Steve says.Bucky lies back on his lounger and takes a sip.“But then what would I do all day?”Steve rolls his eyes.Bucky picks up his book off the side. He’s reading a textbook on Mayan history and culture. Steve picks up his sketch book. Staring at the idyllic landscape and sipping on his cocktail, hoping he might be able to instil this feeling of bliss into his soul, to keep with him when he goes home to New York. If he can get enough of the warmth into the pages of his sketch book, maybe the he really could bring some of it home with him.Steve is three cocktails down when he finally stops looking sideways at Bucky in his deck chair and asks him.“Can I sketch you?”Bucky looks up, startled, clearly engrossed in his book.“Oh, uh, sure.”He knows it can seem creepy, which is why he’s never done it before. Although he was damn tempted on the plane. It probably should be less creepy since he’s a ‘professional artist’ (Steve still isn’t sure about that, even after standing looking up at his portraits in galleries from New York to London). Steve has always struggled to accept his success. Even when it was has been staring him in the face. Even sitting in fucking Mexico with his PA on the lounger next to him sipping a cocktail.Steve grins. He still thinks he’s being a bit creepy, but Bucky looks the perfect picture of sunshine holiday bliss that he’s trying to infuse in the pages of the sketchbook.Steve turns to sit on the edge of the sun lounger and scoots it back across the tiles. Bucky looks self conscious for a second.  “How do you want me to sit?” he asks.“However you like. How you are is fine.”Bucky frowns and slings one arm behind his head, his book in his other hand, and looks at Steve through his ray bans.Christ. It wasn’t quite the heat he was going for it but he’s sure it will still bring some warmth to the page. He quickly sketches Bucky’s outline, then the lounger, the parasol, the wall behind him. Then fills it in, sketching fast and light, he can add colour later. He needs to get the angles right, the angle of his jaw, his collar bone, the curves of his arms, his pecs, his abs, that hair.Those stupid trunks. They are very quickly sketched with a nose wrinkle of distaste before he gets to Bucky’s thighs. He slows down, the lean muscle, the dark hair, tanned skin, down to his bare feet. Steve gets it all. Then he colours. Then he realises somehow Bucky has managed to keep mostly still this whole time and probably has a god awful ache in his arm.“I’m done.”“Man. Ouch. I never realised being a model was such hard work.”Steve laughs.“Pick a less sexy pose next time.”“Oh you don’t mean that, boss,” Bucky purrs, downing the last of his marg and putting it on the side with his book.“Let’s see.”Steve shows him.“Damn.”Steve laughs.“You like it?”Bucky stares at it. Then looks back up at Steve. He’s blushing.Steve’s startled. He’s so charming, smirks and smiles and confidence most of the time and for a second Steve thinks he’s seeing something different.“What?” Has Steve been creepy?“Is this really how you see me?”“Yeah?” Steve said cautiously.Bucky looked at him hard, furrowing his brow. Then it went, the charming smile was back.“Great. Do it bigger when we get home. I want to win an award.”Steve laughed.“What are you going to call it?” Bucky asks.Steve took it back and looked at it.“Unwise indulgence.”Bucky grinned.“Can I take a picture of it?”“Sure.”Bucky snaps a picture and Steve puts it back on the side.He chances a look at his phone. He swipes away the hundreds of likes on his socials. He finds the photos Bucky posted earlier on his account. Him lying in the pool. The picture of them together is missing. It’s probably for the best. He wonders how he can voice asking Bucky for it. He smiles and tries to sketch from memory Bucky floating in the Cenote, grinning. Water droplets splashed on his sunglasses. He’s so engrossed he doesn’t realise Bucky has got up of his chair to go for a piss.“Want another marg?”Steve’s shakes his head and hears Bucky go back into the house. He feels fuzzy. He has a feeling his drawing will look like a load of nonsense lines when he looks at it tomorrow. For now though it looks good.He picks up his pastels, his blue, green, yellows, colouring in the sparkling water, then vines and leaves that surround the cenote. And there is Bucky in the middle.Glowing golden skin.He jumps at the hand in his hair, then gasps at the cold ice Bucky runs over his neck. Bucky laughs he head of, leaning forward and rubbing it all over his chest.“Bucky!” he shrieks.“You looked like you were overheating.”“Uhuh.” He certainly is now.“Look at that.” Bucky looks at Steve’s sketch. “You’re making me look like a god, glowing like that in the middle of a pool.”“Maybe I should have added a clam shell.”Bucky snorts and walks round to his chair.“And some cherubs?”“That’s it.”He looks up and down Steve and bites his lip. For a second Steve thinks he might just walk round and straddle his lap and ride him like Steve wants so, so, bad.“Come on, boss, you’re gonna get burnt. Wanna watch a movie?”“Sure.” Steve feels the beers and cocktails as he gets to his feet and Bucky knowingly puts his arm out to steady him.“Too much tequila, boss?”Steve grins at him.“Is that a thing?”He follows Bucky inside and slides the glass door shut behind them. He sighs in the cool air con.“Pick a movie. I’ll be over,” Bucky says.Steve nods, settling on the sofa and scrolling aimlessly through Netflix. He picks a prison break. Bucky is over by the sink with his back to him, shaking himself another drink because his liver is apparently made of steel.Steve wants. This is bad.He finds an excuse to go to the kitchen, bringing his empty glass and putting it in the dishwasher. Bucky is mixing the cocktail when Steve stands behind him. No excuse whatsoever.“You got quite a knack to that, you used to work a bar?” Steve asks.He watches Bucky shake the mixer.“Oh yeah.” Bucky doesn’t turn round. “Had a lot of jobs.”Steve’s hands are on Bucky’s hips and his doesn’t know how they got there. His urge to shove Bucky against the counter is clouding his brain. Bucky doesn’t object. Doesn’t say a thing. Steve slides his hands over Bucky’s bare solid abs. Over that trail of hair.“Don’t you make me spill,” Bucky’s voice is even, but Steve can feel his body tensing.He stays still as Bucky pours the cocktail into the glass. Puts it back on the counter.“I wanna see the photo,” Steve says. He runs his thumb up and down Bucky’s stomach.Bucky doesn’t ask which photo, just brings it up on his phone, his hands annoyingly steady, and sends it to Steve.His phone pings back over on the sofa.“Was that all you wanted?” Bucky asks.Bucky turns and they’re chest to chest again. Bucky raises his eyebrows, his face blank as he waits for Steve to answer.“Damn you to hell, you know what I want.”Bucky looks up at him with innocent blue eyes.“I thought you said you didn’t want another cocktail?”Steve closes his eyes and walks away, Bucky’s laughter follows him over to the sofa. Steve tries to steady himself. He makes the mistake of opening the photo in his phone.
Oh shit.
Bucky comes and sits right next to Steve on the sofa. It’s a three seater. He pulls up one of the little glass tables for his cocktail.Bucky glances at the photo and smirks.“Admiring yourself, boss?”“Thinking about making it my new profile pic,” Steve counters.Bucky laughs, knowing he doesn’t have the nerve.“Unless you got a jealous partner I should be worried about,” Steve says.“You know I don’t.” He reaches over Steve’s lap for the remote.“Well I realised last night there’s lots I don’t know about you.”“Well that bits accurate.”Bucky presses play. Steve lifts his arm up and Bucky snuggles into his side, puts his head on Steve’s chest. Turns into Steve and puts a leg over Steve’s. Steve puts his arm round him. Steve feels warm. Content. Sexually frustrated enough to pull the man’s clothes off, but that content feeling remains.What in fuck are they doing. He only vaguely watches the plot of the movie. Bucky’s weight on his chest is sending his brain into overdrive.The credits roll. It’s gone dark outside.Bucky yawns and stretches out his legs.“Bed time, boss.”Steve nods. He desperately wishes he could crawl back into Bucky’s bed. He needs a reality check. They’re not a couple. Bucky is his employee and fucking him would be a bad idea, let alone asking him if he wants to marry him and live in Mexico forever.Fuck. Where did that thought come from?Bucky gets up first, takes his glass to the sink, and Steve takes his cue to go upstairs to bed and not make this weird. His brain points out that Bucky was the one that climbed into his lap. Cuddled up to him in the car. Bucky the one that initiated it last night but...he still doesn’t want Bucky to think he’s a creep.“Night, Bucky,” he calls over his shoulder.“Night, boss.”

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Steve brushes his teeth and crawls into bed. He still feels a tad tipsy. He gulps down a glass of water to stave off a hangover and crawls into the crisp white sheets. He feels empty, cold. He tells himself not to be ridiculous and turns off the light. This has to stop. Whatever the hell it is. It’s fun, yes, and more excitement than Steve has had in ages but this will stop tonight. He is a professional.He begins to drift off to sleep. He thinks of standing behind Bucky at the kitchen counter. Thinks of sliding his thumbs under the waistband of his shorts. His brain barrages him with memories of all the noises Bucky made when he’d sucked him off. That guttural moan. He chucks back the covers and touches himself, still half asleep as he lazily pumps his cock.That’s when he hears the door open. He gasps as the light from the hall spills into the room, Bucky silhouetted against it. Steve freezes.“Don’t stop on my account,” Bucky’s voice is low. Gorgeous.Steve closes his eyes. This is such a terrible idea. But the idea of Bucky watching him...Bucky leaves the door open and casually takes off his clothes as he watches Steve jerk off like they do this all the time. Steve groans at the site of him.“Bucky.”“Sorry boss, my rooms cold. Air con won’t turn off. You mind if I share with you?” his tone is still low, but laced with amusement at what they both know is a poor made up excuse.“Sure,” Steve is impressed that he manages to reply sensibly.Bucky smiles, the light of the hall catches the angles of his face, his hips, his clearly hard dick. It sends Steve’s over the edge and he snaps.“Fuck. Get over here, Buck. Been driving me crazy all day.”“You can have me whenever you want boss,”  Bucky says innocently. “You just have to ask.”Steve groans as Bucky crawls into his bed. Bucky lies opposite him on his side and starts to jerk himself off, eyes fixed on Steve’s. Occasionally breaking eye contact to flick his gaze down to Steve’s dick.“You are so fucking sexy I swear to god Buck,” Steve’s tone is slipping lower, as his rationality saying why he shouldn’t do this gets quieter and quieter until it fades all together.Bucky pulls Steve closer, grabs his ass. Steve groans, the heat and hardness of Bucky’s body on his driving him crazy.“And you look good enough to eat, boss.” He licks a strip up Steve’s neck, follows it back down with his teeth.Steve groans, takes his spare hand and runs it over Bucky’s back, his ass, his thighs.“Steve,” Bucky groans in his ear. “You want it, why don’t you take it?”Steve can’t answer. His hands travel between Bucky’s cheeks, hovering around his asshole.Bucky groans. Steve shoves him onto his front. His resolve broken. He spreads Bucky’s legs and Bucky shivers.“Yes, yes, please, Steve.”Steve pushes his face in between his legs. He wasn’t planning on it, but he needs to taste. Bucky yelps as he feels his tongue.“Fuck!”Steve licks him long and slow, pulling his cheeks apart with his thumbs, licking slow and as deep as he can. Pushing into the contracting rings of muscle. He slowly strokes Bucky’s dick at the same time, groaning at the heavy feel of it in his hand.Bucky is swearing and gasping and Steve allows himself a bit of pride. At the mess he’s reducing Bucky too.“Steve, Steve, fuck, more, please.”He grabs the lube from his dresser drawer.Bucky groans, knowing what he’s doing.“You done this before?” Steve asks.Bucky nods.Steve slides in the tip of his finger and Bucky moans, pushing himself back against Steve’s finger, back and forth, working himself open without Steve even having to move his hand. Steve groans as he watches it, feels that tight heat round his finger.Bucky is moaning, swearing, until he pushes himself back all the way as Steve slowly pumps his cock.  “Ah! Yeah.”Steve curls his fingers and Bucky gasps.“Steve! Fuck!”God.“More.”Steve considers teasing him after Bucky’s been winding him up all day, but he can’t bring himself to do it. He wants Bucky out of his mind with pleasure. Dissolved, sloppy, sticky, and barely able to speak.He gets more lube, slides in another finger. Curls.Bucky yells.“Steve, Steve, fuck, oh shit that’s so good.”“Mmm, like that baby?”“Yeah, yeah, yeah.”Bucky takes three fingers and starts to babble incoherent nonsense. His cock is ready to spill in Steve’s hand, purple and throbbing.Steve desperately wonders what it would be like to push inside Bucky. To fuck him into pure incoherence. Something stops him. To slam him into the bedframe, fuck him hard until he screams so loud Steve’s ears buzz.He can’t. It’s crossing a line. Instead he moves both his hands faster. Fucks Bucky wide open. Till Bucky shrieks. Till his body shakes.“Steve, Steve, boss, I’m gonna…”“Yeah, honey, yeah, you come for me.”Bucky yells, spilling over Steve’s fingers, body shaking and spasming, his hands gripping hard on the sheets.“Steve,” he groans one last time, pushing his head into the pillows as he shudders. He goes to move but Steve pulls his hand out and keeps a firm grip on Bucky’s hips.“Stay there.” The command sends another shiver down Bucky’s body. “Good, good, keep still.”Steve moves over Bucky and Bucky whimpers, probably thinking Steve’s going to fuck him.Instead Steve leans over him, pumping own dick, running it between Bucky’s cheeks, over his ass, inbetween his thighs.“’m not gonna fuck you. Can’t. Can’t. But I can come over your gorgeous ass.”“No, Steve, please, god, fuck me, I need…inside me I... Please...”“I can’t, I can’t,” Steve pumps his dick, leans over Bucky, kisses his neck, his shoulders, groans, pulls on his hair. “We can’t…it’s not…”Bucky is shaking underneath him. He doesn’t know why but his mind has drawn a line in the sand.“Please, Steve,” he sounds like he’s going to sob.Steve groans. He is sticking to his guns until Bucky pushes himself up on his elbows and turns back to look at him. Bucky’s eyes are wide and dark, his hair is in his face, damn with sweat. His cheeks glow. His lips are red and swollen where he’s been biting them. They’re parted as he pants.“Oh fuck,” Steve mutters, running a hand through Bucky’s hair, runs his thumb down Bucky’s cheek. “Look at you, baby. Baby you’re so gorgeous, so fucked.”His dick screams for Bucky’s body.“Get it in me. Right now.” It’s a growl. “Put it in me right now or I quit.”Steve laughs despite of his body screaming at him, his pulse pounding in his ears. He breaks.“Alright. Alright.” He grabs a condom from the drawer and pulls it over his throbbing dick.He pushes just the head inside and Bucky moans.“Yeah, yeah, yeah, more.”He tries to keep control of his body as he pushes forward, but his dick is taking over, his hands now both firm on Bucky’s hips. Holding Bucky still as he fucks into him, stretching him, back and forth, sliding inside that gorgeous heat. That gorgeous body. “Steve,” Bucky moans. “Yes. Oh fuck Steve you’re thick. More.”Bucky squeals as Steve gives him what he wants. Steve groans as he bottoms out. He’s done it. He’s crossed the last line. Nothing has ever felt so good than Bucky’s ass tight around him.“You okay?” Steve manages to ask through the sex crazed haze in his brain.“Yeah, yeah, I never been so good. Come on Steve, I’m not a virgin, give it to me. Take it.”He doesn’t have to ask how Bucky likes it. He knows it’s going to be rough from the way he wanted his fingers, from the way Bucky is growling. Shoving his hips back.“Okay, okay, gorgeous, you want it, you got it.”He fucks him hard, fast, rough, his fingertips digging into Bucky’s hips. It’s bliss. Pure fucking bliss. His eyes roll back into his head. He takes it how he wants it. Letting days, weeks, months of frustration work it’s way out in the slams of his hips.Bucky is shrieking, yelling, slamming his hips back in time with Steve’s.“Yes, yes, yes, Steve!” he’s yelling so loud, uninhibited and free and it’s so fucking sexy. Steve is so glad they’re in a villa with no near neighbours.He yanks Bucky up, wanting to see his face again. He’s so glad he does. Bucky is gone. Wrecked. His eyes wild.Bucky suddenly shoves him back, shoves Steve onto his back with surprising strength and straddles him, impaling himself on Steve’s dick.Steve groans, fucking up into him as Bucky rides his dick. Only now. Now he can see him. See Bucky’s face contort with every thrust, his lips parted, his muscles contracting, tight. His hair is spilling out of the elastic band and falling on his shoulder. Bucky is the most beautiful, sexiest person Steve has ever seen in his life.He must have accidentally said that aloud cos Bucky’s face breaks into a grin. He leans over Steve, rests his head against his as he works his hips, driving Steve closer.“You’re so fucking beautiful, Bucky.”Bucky kisses him. And Steve is screwed. He groans at the filthy opened mouthed sloppy kiss Bucky gives him, let’s Bucky’s lick into his mouth, over his teeth, bite on his lip, and then yells into his mouth as he starts to come.“Oh shit!”“Yeah, come inside me, give me everything, boss.”Steve does, ruthless snaps of his hips that make Bucky squeal into his mouth, shaking, as Steve grabs his hips again. Uses his perfect body to get himself off. He gasps at the height of his orgasm, it takes his breath, fucking Bucky hard and fast as he goes over the edge.Bucky is yelling, trembling, clenching around his dick hard and Steve realises he coming too. Completely fucking untouched. Steve crests, yelling, pounding it all out into Bucky as he feels Bucky coming on his stomach, his grip on his ass sure to bruise.The pant their breath back, aftershocks still shaking through them, still moving slowly against each other, enjoying ever jolt, every shiver, that runs over them in the aftermath.“Holy fuck,” Bucky sighs against Steve’s shoulder as they finally still.“Uh,” Steve agrees. Unable to form a word. A coherent thought.Bucky shivers against him again, aftershocks apparently still going through him. Steve strokes a hand up and down his back.“Fuck,” Steve says eventually. Closes his eyes. That was easily the greatest shag of his life.He comes back to himself and realises how hard and brutal he must have been fucking Bucky at the end.“You okay?” he asks quickly.“I am on post orgasm cloud fucking nine. Don’t you dare ruin it by telling me we shouldn’t have done that,” Bucky says into his ear. Completely collapsed on his chest.Steve laughs.“Okay.” He runs his hand through Bucky’s hair and Bucky shivers.What the hell have they done.Bucky pushes up on the bed and kisses Steve. Steve groans, fighting the instinct to pull away and tell him they can’t do this. When it’s clearly far to late for that.He kisses him back, long and slow and Steve is in heaven. His heart flips. Oh shit. He’s about to blurt out something stupid about being in love with him when Bucky speaks first.“I’m so fucking sticky.”“Mmm. Lemme go get a cloth.”“No. Stay.”Steve laughs.“But...sticky.”Bucky frowns. Deeply displeased.“Fine. But you’d better come back.”Bucky moves off him and let’s Steve get out of bed. He looks back over his shoulder at Bucky. He’s lying on his back, looking like the picture of debauchery. Covered in sweat, cum, lube, his hair a complete mess.“Why, you gonna threaten to quit again if I don’t?” Steve teases.Bucky laughs, dragging his eyes up and down Steve’s naked body.“I might.”Steve laughs, goes to the bathroom, grabs cloths and towels and a glass of water and brings them back. He throws Bucky a cloth, cleans himself up, dries off, then throws them in the laundry basket. Bucky throws his in the same direction, running his hands through his long hair before pulling it back into an elastic.“Fuck you’re gorgeous.” Steve shakes his head.Bucky smirks.“Yeah you said that already. Come here. I need cuddling. Then sleep.”At least Bucky is very clear about what he wants now. During the day Steve had no god damn idea what he wanted, apart from to possibly drive Steve insane.They curl up on the bed and Steve moans quietly at the way they fit together so well. So warm. Bucky’s skin is so soft, so perfect, better than he even imagined in stolen glances and late night wanks.He drifts off happily this time, content, peaceful, silencing the part of his brain that condemns this as the worst idea he’s ever had. Shh.*Steve hears a bang and a clatter and sits bolt upright, reaching for Bucky, reaching for the light. Bucky’s no longer in bed.“Shh. Keep still. Be quiet. Do exactly what I tell you.”Bucky’s voice is calm and clear and Steve had no choice but to obey.There’s someone downstairs in the house. Steve can hear them moving around. Bucky puts his finger to his lips. Steve’s heart pounds in his chest.His eyes adjust to the dark and he can make Bucky out now, over by the door. He’s standing side on, ear to the door, gun in his hand.The bottom drops out of Steve’s stomach. He can hear commotion downstairs. Bucky opens the door slowly. Beckons Steve to come with him.“You know how to use a gun?” he asks Steve.Steve shakes his head and balks at the gun in Bucky’s hand.“Have the knife then. Stay behind me.” A knife is put in Steve’s hand. Steve stares at it.“Shouldn’t we call the police, or?” Steve whispers.Bucky shakes his head.“Work for the cartels. No point.”Steve follows him down the stairs more scared than he has ever been in his entire life. His heart is pounding in his chest. His legs are shaking. He knows he’s well built, could probably take someone in a fight, and he’s got Bucky with him who apparently knows who to shoot a gun. But jesus, a cartel?They get downstairs. The clattering continues, and Steve frowns at the noise in the kitchen, the living room, it sounds frenzied, wild. He wonders if they’re on drugs. Ripping apart the downstairs looking for money. Steve hopes that’s what it is, they can have everything, as far as he’s concerned, if they’ll just get out of their house and leave them both safe.Bucky’s ahead of him, his gun in both hands. Checking the corners of the room.Bucky suddenly relaxes and laughs.“What?” Steve whispers, he still feels like they’re about to die and is utterly confused.Bucky flicks on the light. Sat on the kitchen counter are three raccoons.“For fucks sake.” Steve collapses back against the kitchen door, slides down it so he’s sitting on the floor. One of the racoons tilts his head at him curiously.  The cold sweat drenching him and pounding heart now seeming utterly ridiculous.Bucky’s laughing. Shaking his head. Shooing the critters of the counter and out of the door one of them must have left open. They chitter and chatter and then are silenced as Bucky closes the sliding glass door behind them.They both look around in stunned silence.The living room is trashed, a lamp on its side, the sofas scratched, TV cables bitten through. There’s papers everywhere, the fridge is open, food scattered all over the floor.  They have been everywhere.“I always wanted a pet racoon when I was a kid,” Bucky muses as he locks the door and surveys the mess. “Guess my ma was right about that one.”Steve can’t talk. His brain is still recovering.“You okay, Steve?” Bucky frowns.“Uh. No.” He shakes his head. “No.”Bucky puts the gun down on the side and is over to Steve in a second when he realises he’s not okay.He kneels in between Steve’s legs and wraps his arms round him.“Hey, it’s fine, it’s okay, you’re safe. No cartels. No burglars. Sorry. I shouldn’t have said that before. Overactive imagination.”“Too much Netflix,” Steve finds his voice, resting his chin on Bucky’s shoulder.“Yeah,” Bucky strokes his hands through his hair. Soft and soothing. They’re both still naked, and Bucky’s hot body against his calms him down. “Let’s go back to bed, yeah? Sort this mess out in the morning?”Steve looks around then nods.“Yeah, yeah okay.”Bucky picks the gun up off the table and Steve gulps. They get back to the room and he watches him put the gun casually on the nightstand. Steve can’t bring it up right now. He can’t bare to. He just wants to be safe, warm, and to go back to sleep.They’re back in bed, and this time Steve is on his side being the small spoon, with Bucky wrapped around him. Holding him tight.It does the trick. Calms him right down. Racoons. He laughs to himself.“You feeling better?”“Yeah, but please don’t stop.”Bucky kisses his shoulder.“I won’t. Hey. I got you, okay? Always got you.”Steve nods. He knows he does. But he is also acutely aware that he has no idea who Bucky really is. Who handles a gun so well. A knife so well. Has enough strength to overpower Steve if he wants to.“Go to sleep, boss, I got you.”Despite that Steve has a feeling that if anyone tried to hurt him, Bucky would snap their neck.He falls asleep in his arms with Bucky stroking his hair.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

This time when he wakes up the sun is high in the sky and Bucky is lying on his chest.He tries to work out why he’s so tired still. Right. Raccoons. Bucky. Gun.He looks over to the night stand. The knife sits there. He can’t see the gun at first until he sees the handle poking out from out the side of Bucky’s pillow. Pewter grey against the white sheets. He looks over Bucky’s face, his body. He’s thrown the sheets down so they are pooled around his legs.Obviously, the man is fucking gorgeous. And Steve has clearly noticed that before, but he’s never had time to really look. Usually in far too much of a frenzy to take his time over discovering Bucky’s skin.Now he can enjoy Bucky’s body bathed in sunlight, golden against the white cotton. Dark hair between his legs, his chest... But Steve notices something else... Scars. He’s no idea if they’re the kind you would get from an operation, or a knife fight, but from where he’s lying he can see three. The longest is down right of his abdomen, from the bottom of his ribs, skirting the side of his abs, ending just at the top of his jutting out hip bone. The other is below his left nipple, a horizontal white dash of skin only a few inches long. The other starts at the top of his thigh, down just below his groin. He was bloody lucky with that one, Steve thought idly. A few inches up or down and it would have hit his dick or his femoral.He realises he’s started absentmindedly stroking his thumb up and down the thigh scar, wondering who dared mark this gorgeous man’s skin.Bucky doesn’t stir, and Steve needs a piss, as much as he’s enjoying the opportunity to stare at Bucky’s body all he likes in the golden light of the morning.He slides from under his PA. Bucky grumbles but turns over and pulls the duvet back over himself, burying his head face down in the pillows.Steve smiles, but his eyes are drawn to the gun, still poking out from underneath.He pulls on his boxers and goes downstairs. Then he remembers about the raccoons. He shakes his head and swears, putting his hands over his face. His steps over a pack of split open pasta to get to the coffee machine. He pokes at it blindly and then stares unmoving at the mess of the living room.Goodbye deposit. He can afford it, easy, but it’s such a stupid waste. Bucky will sort it all out, he’s sure. The coffee machine beeps at him and he takes his Americano out onto the patio. He pulls out his phone.What time is it in New York?Steve supposes it doesn’t make any difference; Tony Stark keeps his own time. He calls him.Tony answers on the second ring. The sound of buzzing and whirring fills Steve’s ears and he winces and takes the phone aware from his ear.“Hey, hang on, Jarvis turn off. Hey Rogers, what’s up? How’s Mexico?”“My villa got raided by raccoons.”Tony bursts out laughing.“What? I love racoons! Keep them!”“That’s just what Bucky said.”He’d met Tony at a gala for the opening of one of the exhibitions he’d been involved in. He’d heard of him of course, and just assumed he was an idiot, egotistical millionaire playboy that would be insufferable. He was all those things, but he also made Steve laugh, he was more intelligent than he’d expected, and did a lot more charity work than was publicized or associated with Stark Industries. He still called Tony a jerk at least once in every interaction they had, but they got along, and Steve soon found him becoming one of his best friends. He was a good guy, really just a massive nerd underneath all the designer suits, models, and champagne.“Well he’s right. I forgot you took him out there with you.”“Yeah…uh…Tony.” Steve sighed, trying to work out how to phrase this. “Do you uh, know much about his past?”“What do you mean?”“Like, um, before he became the best PA anyone ever had.”“Uh, I dunno, why?” This wasn’t good. Steve could hear in Tony’s voice that he was intrigued, and that now Steve was never going to get away with only telling him half of the story.Steve sighed. He didn’t know how much to say without breaking Bucky’s trust. He definitely didn’t want to tell him about Bucky’s nightmares and PTSD. That was way too personal.“He has a knife. And a gun. And I have a feeling he has a lot of experience in using them.”“Oh. Huh.”Steve narrowed his eyes. There was something in Tony’s voice that was off.“So did you fuck him yet?”Steve closes his eyes.Tony starts laughing at his lack of response.“Oh fuck you.” Steve rolls his eyes. “Yes, fine. Yes.”“Rogers! You finally got laid! I’m coming over and bringing champagne.”“Don’t you dare. Oh my god.” Steve put his hand over his face. “Was it that obvious?”“That you already act like a married couple and that you look at him like he’s a delicious slice of cake?”Steve groans.“Was it good?”Steve blushes. He’s never been one for talking about his sex life with his friends.“Fine, it was incredible. Okay?”Tony laughs in delight.“I am delighted for you. When’s the wedding?”“Uh, Tony, shut up. Look. You can look people up, right?”“Steve that’s creepy, just ask him.”“I did! He’s elusive.”“Have you tried asking him when you’re balls deep inside him, I’ve found that makes people really talkative sometimes?”Steve blushes so hard he thinks he face might set alight.“Tony!”Tony laughs. Steve’s sure he only said it to make Steve cringe.“Steve, lots of Americans own guns. I own a gun.”“Do you keep it under your pillow?”“Alright, no, but that’s what I have security for. Like I keep saying you need to get.”Steve rolls his eyes.“I’m not a big deal like you, Tony. No one gives a shit about an artist like me.”“I’m telling you, you get into the millions, start working with certain companies, start pissing major gas corporations off, people start to know who you are. You should be getting security.”“You’re deflecting.”“Alright, alright, if you wanna be the creepy boyfriend and have me look him up I will, okay? I’ll let you know.”“He’s not my boyfriend.”“That’s your second mistake,” Tony says.Steve frowned.“What was my first?”“Not getting security, or maybe not keeping the racoons, I forget.”Steve rolls his eyes.“Look just let me know if you find anything okay? I need to know if I have some ex-Yakuza sleeping in my bed.”“You know the Yakuza are Japanese, right? And they usually have tattoos.”“Tony! Just let me know?”“Yeah, yeah, okay. I’ll message you.”“Bye Tony.”“Bye Rogers.”He sighs and shakes his head. He feels guilty already. Dirty, for asking Tony to look Bucky up, when Bucky is someone he trusts so implicitly. But there’s a funny feeling in his stomach, an unease. The calm focus on Bucky’s face last night when they’d thought there was someone downstairs, his clear instructions. The way he’d easily overpowered Steve during his nightmare. It felt practised…professional.That’s it. He’s put his finger on it. Professional. Professional killer. Steve gulps.“Hey, shit, I didn’t know you knew how to make coffee yourself.”Steve jumps at Bucky’s voice and turns, laughing, but he’s worried it comes out artificial.“Yeah, I mastered it.”Bucky frowns, instantly picking up on his unease. He’s wearing his shorts and tank top already and Steve is a little disappointed not to be able to enjoy Bucky’s shirtless.“You okay?” He comes over to Steve, but Steve notices he doesn’t get too close. Letting Steve have his space.“Yeah,” Steve sighs and takes a gulp of his coffee. “Yeah, I’m fine, I think, last night just freaked me out.”Bucky’s face drops, and he backs off a little.“Oh, shit, no, no,” Steve says quickly, “the racoons. Not the sex.”“Oh.” The relief on Bucky’s face makes Steve feel like the biggest jerk in the world for calling Tony about him. He closes the gap between them and pulls Bucky to him till they’re flush together. He holds him tight, and Bucky holds him right back, looking up at Steve and grinning at him.“The sex was amazing,” Steve clarifies.“Your dick is amazing,” Bucky says, laughing at the mortified look on Steve’s face.The coffee maker beeps. Bucky pecks him on the lips, lets him go, and walks back into the kitchen.Steve’s stomach twists with guilt watching him walk away. He walks back inside and starts picking things up off the floor at random that were scattered in last night’s chaos.Bucky shakes his head and laughs again.“I’m so sorry for how I…” he sighs. “You must think I’m nuts.”“I don’t think you’re nuts. I think you’re…trained?” Steve tries gently.Bucky gives him a half smile. Blowing on his coffee.“Still not ready to fire me yet?”“Nope.” Steve isn’t. He just wonders what it will take to get the full story out of him. He wonders whether Tony’s idea might work. Maybe as a last resort.Bucky smiles and kneels next to him on the floor and starts sweeping up the pasta.He’s so close Steve reaches for him on instinct, thinking maybe this is allowed now. He puts his hand into the back of Bucky’s long hair, no ponytail today, and pulls him towards him. Bucky groans and Steve is immediately getting hard at the thought that he can make him moan so easy. Bucky lets Steve pull him in and kisses him, tugging on Steve’s lower lip with his teeth, looking up at him with playful eyes.“Ugh,” Steve groans and pushes Bucky onto his back, kissing him hard, revelling that he can, he’s allowed, and not just allowed, Bucky loves it. He’s moaning into his mouth, his dick already hard against Steve’s leg.Pasta crunches beneath them on the floor and Bucky laughs.“I thought you were trying to clean up?” he says in between kisses, as Steve grinds his hips down against him.“Mmrph,” Steve says, and shoves his tongue in Bucky’s mouth.Bucky moans, relaxing against him, submitting, opening his mouth for Steve.Steve nearly comes in his pants at the action.“Fuck.”Bucky looks at him with big eyes and a smile, knowing exactly what he’s doing to Steve. Steve grinds his hips down against him again, pushing against his dick and Bucky groans.“Steve.”Steve yanks Bucky’s shorts and underwear down, throwing them aside, and shoves his face in Bucky’s crotch. He has never felt so hungry for anyone like he is for Bucky. For Bucky’s dick in his mouth. His slides his lips down.Bucky moans and his head falls back, chin tilting up and revealing to Steve all the marks he made on his neck last night.Steve does everything he can to keep those noises falling from Bucky’s lips. He’s gulping down his dick at the back of his throat, playing with his balls when Bucky groans his name so loud and long Steve nearly comes in his pants again.He’s starting to squirm though, wriggling his hips, needy little whimpers passing through his lips.Steve brings his head up and looks up at Bucky.“You’d better not make me beg this time.” His dark eyes are locked with Steve’s.Steve leans up and kisses him.“Not this time. But. I need to go get the lube.”“No, no, now.” Bucky’s grabs onto his arm tight.“Buck it’s just upstairs I...”“Just use the oil.”Steve looks up at the counter top at the bottle of oil sitting next to the cooker. Looks down at Bucky, breathless, undone, his top pulled up to his elbows, pants round his knees, dick hard and wet, arching up.“Yeah, fuck it, wait, condom?”Bucky takes one out of his shorts pocket and throws it at him.Steve laughs, grabs it, and takes the oil down off the side. His finger slides in easy with the olive oil and Bucky’s moans lower.“Ah, fuck, yeah Steve. Love your big hands.”Steve loves watching his long fingers disappear inside Bucky, using the angle to direct the pitch and frequency of his moans. The perfect music.“I’m ready, come on.”It feels dirtier than last night somehow. Steve goes to take his time but Bucky doesn’t let him, yanking him in hard and making Steve yelp.“Fuck! Oh... Fuck.” He groans as he leans forward over Bucky.Bucky groans, trying to pull him in deeper still. Steve grunts, pulls off Bucky’s pants and throws them across the room, then shoves back Bucky onto his back, pulling his legs up and shoving back in him hard.Bucky yells, and for a second Steve thinks he’s hurt him until he looks at Bucky’s face.“Yes! Fuck, yes Steve that’s so good do it again.”Steve is already getting over whelmed, the feel of Bucky as he fucks into him, the soft silk pressure on his cock and the heat. God the heat. Bucky’s hard dick is slapping between their stomachs and Steve groans.And that’s without all the noises Bucky is making, or the way he looks underneath him, eyes rolled back and head back, taking everything Steve gives him as he fucks him hard.“Yes, Steve, yes, fucccck.”Steve kisses him. It’s wet, sloppy, teeth and uncoordinated but Steve wants. Steve wants Bucky’s tongue sliding along his as he fucks him.Bucky moans into his mouth.“Shit, Steve, Steve, I’m gonna come.”Steve groans and watches Bucky’s face for every second, right until his muscles clamp down on his dick and he comes all over Steve’s stomach. He sends Steve reeling right over the edge with him, coming in short hard fucks into Bucky’s gorgeous ass.“Oh shit, yes, Bucky...” he groans in his ear. Bucky’s still shuddering underneath him when Steve’s finally spent.Steve pants and opens his eyes. Bucky’s hazy ones meet his.“Can I request that every morning? You know, with my coffee?”  Bucky says, giving on final shudder before Steve pulls back off him.“Yeah, you make the coffee, and I’ll fuck you whilst it’s cooling down.” Steve knows he should be saying never again. He also knows it’s way too late for that. There is no going back now. He might as well enjoy this possibly lethal but utterly gorgeous, funny, and smart PA he’s found himself with.Bucky grins.“Yes. Perfect.”He comes back to himself and frowns.“This pasta is fucking uncomfortable.”Steve laughs and pulls back off him, cleaning himself up with the kitchen roll and looking down at Bucky and the contents of the kitchen floor mess that he now seems to be covered in.“Let’s see, we got... Pasta, oil, there’s some tomatoes over there... Just need a bit of basil and I could make you into a salad.”Bucky groans but laughs, pushing himself up. He takes the kitchen roll and cleans himself up. He sits back against the kitchen cupboard and reaches above his head for his coffee.He takes a sip and smiles.“Yep, perfect temperature.”Steve laughs.“I’m gonna go get a broom.”They managed to put the downstairs of the villa mostly back together and Bucky rewards them with brunch on the patio.Steve groans as he bites into the pancakes.“Which of your many jobs did you learn to cook in, again?”Bucky laughs and gives Steve an amused glance as he slathers over the maple syrup.“Oh none, cooking’s a hobby. My mom taught me.”“Thank you, then, to your mom.”Bucky smiles.“So I got tickets to that show you want to go to tonight.”Steve frowned.“Show?”“You know at that famous club in Cancun.”Steve laughs.“Right,” Steve points his fork at Bucky. “The club you wanted to go to in Cancun?”Bucky grins at him and he has this horrible feeling he’d give him anything wants. Jesus. This was how people end up getting shafted for half their wealth.“Sure, what we going to see?”“The circus, cirque du soleil.”Steve nods.“Cool.”“It wasn’t that expensive don’t worry,” Bucky winks at him.Steve closes his eyes and laughs.“Mm, I’m sure. Is it fancy?” Steve wrinkles his nose.“Uh...yeah. Tonight is black tie night. I laid your tux already so it’s ready to go.”“I didn’t I pack my tux!”“Yeah but I did.” Bucky grins.“And when did you even lay them out?”“Whilst you were on the phone to Tony,” Bucky says placidly.Oh. Shit. Steve nearly chokes on his breath.“Oh.” Steve tried not to look guilty. Tries not to blush.“How is that nutter anyway?”“Oh, yeah he’s fine.” Steve wasn’t sure if he’d even asked him.“Why are you blushing?” Bucky smirks at him. Seeing right through him. Every time.Steve closes his eyes. Lie but don’t lie. He opens them and looks at Bucky again.“He asked me if I’d fucked you yet.”Bucky bursts out laughing.Steve looks back down at his pancakes and dips one in maple syrup.“He said I looked at you like I was on a diet and you were the best dessert.”Bucky laughs.“I am.” He winks at him and Steve rolls his eyes.“Anyway, taxis coming at 7, yeah?”Steve looks at the clock. 3pm.“Yeah, cool.”  *It’s 6.30 pm and Steve is still lying on the sun lounger. Bucky’s hands hand on his shoulders. He shudders. Strong fucking hands. Bucky’s voice jerks him from his thoughs.“Boss.” He pushes his thumbs up Steve’s neck.“I can’t help but notice you’re still not ready.”“I got half an hour, right?”Bucky leans down over Steve and grabs Steve’s ear lobe in his teeth. Pulls.“Go and get in the shower.”There’s a edge to Bucky’s voice that makes Steve shudder.Steve looks up into Bucky’s hard blue eyes and gulps. He looks stunning as always in his fitted dark grey suit. His long black hair has a slight curl to it and is falling loose on his shoulders. Steve nods. Gets up off the sun lounger.Steve feels Bucky’s eyes on him as he walks back into the villa. He quickly showers and finds the black tux hanging up in his room.He tries not to groan. It feels too much like work. But he knows Bucky wants to go. It would be fine. At least people wouldn’t be trying to talk to him all the time.He knows why he hates the tux so much. It makes him feel like a little boy, dressing up in his dad’s clothes. Enough people have told him he looks good enough a tux, including Bucky, but he still feels awkward.   He looks around for the bow tie. Finds it. Stares at it. He can’t find the will to try.“Buck!” he calls down the stairs.Bucky runs up the stairs, then smirks at the site of Steve, standing with bow tie in hand, looking clueless.“You look so fucking hot in that tux I swear to god.”Steve blushes. Okay. Bucky has never told him he looks good in it quite like that before.“Face me. Head up.” Steve does as he’s told. Trying not to look down at Bucky’s crazy pretty eyes as he made short work of the bow tie.“Perfect.” Bucky grins at him. “Let’s go dancing.”“I thought we were going to the circus.”Bucky grinned.“Circus, then dancing.”Steve groans.“You know, we could just stay here and I could fuck you all night in the tux?”The taxi beeps outside.“Circus, dancing, then you fuck me all night in the tux?”Steve sighs.“Yeah. Okay.”He follows Bucky down to the taxi.They arrive outside and see the queues to the entrance and Steve groans. Bucky rolls his eyes at him, flashes the tickets at one of the bouncers and they’re whisked off to a separate entrance with no queue.“How much did I pay for these tickets?” Steve asks.“Would you rather wait in the queue?” Bucky drawls as they’re lead through to the VIP area, their table right in front of the stage, complete with their own waiter who puts a two bottles of beer, a bottle of tequila, and two shot glasses on their table.Bucky chats away to the waiter in Spanish and Steve takes a shot of tequila. Its good tequila.“Oh my god. That’s good.”The waiter looks delighted.“Ah wonderful, plenty more in the back if you finish that one.”Bucky laughs.Steve loses his misgivings when he realises they are on their own table, plenty of space from other people, with a good quality bottle of tequila, and incredible entertainment. Acrobats swing from the ceiling above them, across the stage. Music throbs through the hall. The whole place sparkles, and yet Steve’s gaze is constantly drawn away from the stage to Bucky’s face. The joy there, his grin, his excitement, the sparkles that reflect in his blue eyes.Steve is halfway through the show when he realises what he’s doing.Oh shit. He’s falling in love isn’t he. Has he already fallen in love with him months ago and he hasn’t noticed because he’s a idiot? Steve takes another shot. Lets himself get lost in the glamour, the bright lights, the confetti falling from the ceiling. Bucky’s smile.Oh shit.The show ends in an explosion of flames and fireworks and Steve stands with Bucky as the tables are removed and the place is turned into a dance floor. The world is spinning around him. Or maybe that’s just Bucky turning them, his arms round Steve’s waist, grinning at him. The place packs out, but Steve barely notices, none of his usual anxiety. He’s floating in a beer/champagne/tequila cloud that he’s sure is going to hurt like a bitch in the morning.He doesn’t care. Future Steve can suck it.Bucky’s lips are on his in the dark, pulling him into the darker part of the club, the shadows, into the crowd where no one saw what you were up to. There are bodies all around then and Bucky is rolling his hips up against him. Steve has never danced like this, and definitely never in public.“Bucky,” he groans in his ear, pushing right back up against him. The luminescent paint on Bucky’s face and suit glows. Steve has no idea when that had happened, but he’s covered in it too.“You wanna get out of here?” Steve asks.Bucky grins at him and nods, leading them out to the door. Steve’s arm possessive and hungry round Bucky’s waist. They are nearly out the door when Bucky stopped.“Hang on, need a piss.”Steve nods and leans against the wall next to the bathroom. The room spins. The bass from the club hammers in his ears. Whoops. It feels nice though. Pleasant. Floaty. He has feeling whatever happens when they got back to the villa will be short lived.He closes his eyes.The blow to his head and his collision with the floor happens too fast for him to process what’s going on. He’s suspended in drunken disbelief as he’s hauled to his feet and out into the street. Another blow to his head, the pain feels unreal, somewhere distant, suffocating black cloth is over his head and he is put in what he assumes is a van that speeds off into the night, sending him sprawling on a hard metal floor.He can’t think properly. He should be screaming, but his brain won’t work. He still feels drunk, and he can’t work out if his head is spinning because of the tequila or the blow to the head. Everything seems far away. There are men near him, speaking Spanish, tying his wrists, his ankles. Steve doesn’t resist, sees little point. Still isn’t 100% sure this is even real. Plastic tape is slapped over his lips.Is he disassociating? He’s heard of that. He lies bound on the floor with his head spinning. He isn’t sure how long the vehicle moves but it suddenly screeches to a halt.He hears the clang of doors opening and he’s hauled out. People yell at him, he can tell they’re yelling, but he can’t make out the words. He can’t even work out if it’s Spanish or English. White noise rings in his ears, shrill, blocking everything out. He staggers along the ground as they half carry him to some place inside. He’s on a chair. Tied down. Hood still in place. They’re yelling still.He takes another blow to the head. Then it’s quiet, but he can still hear noise next door. He is left alone in the room. He can hear his heartbeat banging in his ears, he knows he’s covered in sweat, bleeding, in pain, he just…can’t seem to feel it.In his artificially calm state he wonders what he was dying for. Was this because of his work? Or is he just another rich idiot they can try and claim ransom on. Do they know who he is? Would the police ever find him? His body?He hears gun shots and it jolts him out of his haze. Yelling, gun shots, bodies hitting the floor. Infighting? Cartels? Who knew. Reality catches up with him, and he struggles to breathe. They must becoming for him next. He supposed being shot was a fairly good way to go. Quick and easy. Depending on where they shot him, of course. Unless they want to torture him for fun.It goes quiet. Eerily quiet after all the noise. Steve can’t breathe for a few minutes, held in suspension as the silence goes on and on. Eventually his body gives up when nothing happens, he sighs out, flops forward. He tries not to freak out about the cloth on his face. The tape on his mouth. Don’t freak out. His body aches, he has a stabbing pain in his side, his head throbs. He strains his ears. What if they all killed each other, who the hell would find him? He’d rather be short that slowly die of thirst strapped to a damn chair. He could just about hear the rumble of traffic. He hears the door open, holds his breath again.“Steve!” Bucky’s voice, drenched in relief.Steve sags in relief.“Bucky?”He winces as the bag is yanked off his head and the bare florescent bulb above his head dazzles his eyes. Bucky’s concerned face fills his view. Bucky’s standing still in his suit. Flecks of blood mix with the paint splatters on Bucky’s pale skin. His suit is creased. There’s blood on the shirt. He’s holding a long black gun in one hand. Steve doesn’t know shit about guns, but he knows it’s a different one to the one he had in the house.They’re in an old house, he’s currently sitting in a disused kitchen with a rusty stove in the corner and a table in front of him.“You okay baby? You hurt?” Bucky flicks his eyes over Steve in quick assessment. He rips the tape off Steve’s face.“Fuck! No, I mean, they hit me a lot.” Steve struggles to put his words together. Both mentally and verbally.Bucky cuts off the rope around his ankles his wrists with a knife. As he turns Steve sees the silver revolver tucked in the back of his waistband.“We gotta go, now.” Bucky slides back into that tone of voice, the one he’d used before when he thought people were in their house. Steve nods.He’s in more pain than he realised, and he staggers as he tries to stand, pain shooting through his stomach, his ribs, his head throbbed. Swims. Threatens to give out on him.“Woah, okay, I got you.” Bucky falls back and grabs Steve round the waist. Carries him along like he weighs nothing.Steve stares at the next room. Ten men are lying dead on the floor. Steve stares at Bucky. They have all been shot in the head.“Would you believe me if I told you they shot each other?” Bucky gives him a half smile.“Uh... No.”Bucky shrugs and carries on around the bodies to the outside. It’s quiet, the stars are bright, they had to be quite far out of the city. There’s no lighting outside but Bucky easily guides him, somehow seeing the way. Steve can only make out the lights still on in the dilapidated house they were leaving behind.Steve hears sirens in the distance.“Ah shit.” Bucky mutters, then all but picks Steve up and puts him on the back of the motorbike. We gotta get out of here.”“Wait, don’t we want the cops?”“Nope.” Bucky jumps on the bike in front of him. “Hold on.”“I’ve never been on a bike I...I don’t have a helmet!” Steve splutters.Bucky turns round and looks at him hard.“Hold. On.”Steve does. About as terrified as when he got bundled into the back of the van. As soon as he’s holding tight round his waist Bucky kicks the bike into action, driving faster than Steve thinks he’s ever gone in his life. Then realises Bucky hasn’t even got the lights on the bike on. He swears and buries his head in Bucky’s shoulder as Bucky speeds along the unlit back roads, only occasionally lit by oncoming traffic that Bucky whizzes through and weaves, as if he is oblivious of the swearing and horns blaring as he does so.Steve has never held onto anyone so hard in his life. This is how he dies. Splattered across the side of the road by his rouge pa.The sirens are behind them now. Bucky accelerates and Steve pushes his face into Bucky shoulder. He’s sure the thing couldn’t go and damn faster. His ears are full of blaring horns and sirens as Bucky weaves and dodges. Bucky swears as they see a row of cop cars ahead of them. Surely this has to be it. The end.“Hold tighter!”  Bucky yells over the noise.Steve groans and clutches tighter, screws his eyes shut, and then they are tilting way too low to the ground. Spinning. Steve screams. A bullet wizzes past his ear. Bucky takes a hand off the bike and shoots right back with the automatic.Steve’s going to die. They’re suddenly vertical again and all the cops are behind them.Steve can’t breathe properly. Still pretty convinced he’s about to be made into strawberry jelly on the asphalt. They seem to put some distance between the cops, and Steve wonders whether Bucky really could lose them.Then there’s a bridge. A bridge lined with more cop cars. Steve swears. But Bucky isn’t stopping. Bucky accelerating and driving towards the concrete curve of the suspension bridge and he cannot possibly be about to do what Steve thinks he’s about to do.Except he is, and they are going up, up, up, and they are flying through the air. It’s all Steve can do not to piss his fucking pants as they go flying over the cop cars and land hard on the other side of them. It jars Steve’s whole body. He’s sure his teeth shake in his skull. Then they’re tearing off again, and the police can’t turn fast enough this time, and Bucky’s jerking the bike right, up into the hills, trees, main road, parking lot.They screech to a halt and Bucky jumps off and is opening the car next to them whilst Steve is still catching his breath.“Get in the car!” Bucky barks and he pushes open the passenger side door.Steve’s body is agony, but he pushes himself off the bike, staggers to the car, falls into the seat, and shuts the door behind him. It’s a steel grey 4x4 with tinted windows. Bucky grabs a black duffle bag from the front. He opens it and Steve realises Bucky didn’t break into this car. Bucky had it waiting.Bucky throws a white tee and jeans at Steve.“Change.”Steve does as he’s told, quick. Trying not to squeal in pain at the stabbing in his side as he changes his clothes. Bucky sheds his blood and paint splattered shirt and switches it for tartan short sleeved shirt. He let’s his hair down from it’s pony tail, arranges it round his face and puts a baseball cap on. He throws Steve a travel pillow and beanie. The guns go in the duffle.Bucky quickly sets up his phone up on the dock in the car, puts on some music, throws a half eaten bag of sweets in the middle of them and puts on Google maps to take them home. Steve is bemused but doesn’t dare saw a word. He puts the travel pillow round his neck. Puts on the beanie.Bucky this time sets off at a completely normal pace, carefully driving the speed limit. It gives Steve time to catch his breath, but unfortunately also allows time for his body to start screaming at him. Bucky says nothing, just stares ahead with focused eyes.A cop car pulls them over. Steve gulps.“Look sleepy.”Steve is fucking sleepy. He nods.Bucky winds down his window.He speaks to the cops in English this time. Steve isn’t sure why.“Hey, did I do anything wrong officer? I’m sorry, I’m not used to driving over here.”“No, sir, you’re all good, just doing a routine check. Where you guys from? On holiday?” the Officer sweeps his eyes over the car.“Yeah, we’re on vacay, from New York. To be honest I got us a little lost, ended up going round a toll, and a detour, but, I think we’re good now?” He frowns at the maps app on his phone.“I told you to take the first exit,” Steve rolls his eyes and mutters, strangely finding it easy to play along.The officer looks at Bucky’s maps and nods and smiles.“Oh yeah, you’re not too far now. You renting this vehicle?”Bucky nods.“Yeah, you wanna see the papers? Stevie you got the papers?”“Oh, yeah.”Steve makes a wild guess and opens the glove compartment. He takes out car rental paperwork and their passports. How the fuck did they get in here. Where did this car even come from? He keeps his face blank and hands them both of to the officer.The officer flicks through them and nods.“Thanks, this all seems fine. Have a safe journey home.”“Thank you, Gracias!” Bucky says in the worst Spanish accent Steve’s ever heard.The man smiles and goes back to his car. Bucky winds the window up gets back on the road. His hands are steady. Doesn’t look the slight bit flustered.Steve is suddenly so tired. And feels a little sick. The maps app tells them they are fifteen minutes away.“Won’t there have been cameras, in the car park?”Bucky shakes his head.“Nope. Picked one without cameras.”They’re silent until they reach the house. They pull up in the drive way.Bucky skirts round the house, revolver in hand, and Steve stands blinking in the kitchen as Bucky checks all the rooms and locks.“Gonna get rid of this car. Stay inside. Go to the bedroom and turn off the lights. Don’t answer your phone. Don’t open the door to anyone. Not even the cops. Stay away from the windows.”Bucky is gone before Steve can ask what in the everliving fuck is going on.*

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Steve goes to his room, shaking, sits down on the edge of the bed, and turns off the lights. He doesn’t know how long Bucky is gone. He’s in the same position when Bucky gets back as when he left.Bucky turns the lights on, comes upstairs. Puts the revolver down on the bedside table. He’s distinctly more relaxed. Steve wishes he was.“We’re safe. We weren’t followed. The house is secure.”“What the fuck just happened?” Steve doesn’t mean to yell. He can’t help it.Bucky is giving Steve a blank look he’s never seen before.“I need to check you over. Stand up, take off you’re clothes.”Steve mouths wordlessly but does as he’s told.Bucky frowns as he feels around him.“You have a broken rib.” He feels around his stomach and Steve winces. “Possible internal bruising.” He checks his skin. Puts his hands over his each side of Steve’s chest and feels.  “No gunshot wounds.  No lung puncture. No stab wounds. No bleeding. Tachycardic.” He comes to look at Steve’s head. “Head wound. Minimal bleeding. Do you feel sick? You feel dizzy?”Steve shakes his head. Bucky looks into his eyes with the torch on his phone.“Tell me if you get any sickness or vomiting.”Steve nods.“Any problem moving any of your limbs?”Steve shakes his head.Bucky continues checking him over.“Baby.” Steve says eventually.This seems to snap Bucky out of his autopilot check over of Steve.“Yeah?”“Who the fuck are you?” Steve asks.“Tony Stark hired me to protect you,” Bucky says matter-of-factly.Steve swore.“That lying little...” he shook his head.“You’d have died without me tonight. I’m assigned to protect you, with my life, if necessary.”“How much is he paying you for that pleasure?”“You’re paying me.”“Of course I am.” Steve closes his eyes then looks hard at Bucky. At the blank emotionless look he’s giving him. “Who are you?”“I am a genetically enhanced soldier created to protect valuable assets and take out threats,” he says automatically. Robotic. “Tony made you?!”“No. The government made me. I escaped from them. Tony employed me. Got rid of the trackers.”Steve stares.“And that’s why you’ve got PTSD.”“Correct.”“And the sex?” he has to ask, although he’s sure it shouldn’t be his priority right now. “Us? Is that all... Fake? Cos Buck…I was falling in love with you.”Bucky comes back to him, his Bucky. He leans forward and kisses him long on the lips.“No. I fucked you because you’re funny, kind, smart, and hot as hell and I am hopelessly in love with how your dick feels inside me. You’re falling in love with me?”“Yeah.” It didn’t seem that big of a deal anymore.Steve blinked. Somehow hard. Despite the terror he’d just experienced. The state his body was in. Maybe because of. It was hard to draw lines.“And those guys that took me?”“Cartel. There’s a price on your head. From someone who knows you’re on holiday. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to nearly kill you by posting all over your Instagram. It is a lot easier to kill people out here and get away with it. I guess I got carried away with the PA side of my job.” He gives Steve a small smile and Steve wonders how anyone could recover from something like this so quickly and start making jokes.“What?! Who put a price on my head?”“Don’t know. But I should be able to find out. If I can get back to my computer. Probably one of the oil companies you’ve been pissing off.”Steve closes his eyes.“They were gonna kill me? I thought it was just being kidnapped cos I was rich and then...”“No. This was a hit.”“Why didn’t they just do it at the club?”“Too public. And they probably wanted to get it on tape. People shell out for a hit like this they like evidence. And bringing someone a severed head is pretty difficult these days. It’s fallen out of fashion.”Steve groans.“Okay. Now I’m gonna throw up.”Bucky helps him to the bathroom.Steve doesn’t actually puke. Just hyperventilates over the toilet. Bucky strokes his back. Guides him under the shower. Washes his wounds. The blood out of his hair.Steve pulls Bucky too him, only then realises they’re both naked. And Bucky’s dick is hard against his leg.“Sorry. Ignore me. Inappropriate. It’s the adrenaline. I get this a lot,” Bucky says.“Gun fights and motorbike chases get you hard?”“It’s the adrenaline... and my stupidly hot boss in the shower probably.”“You sure this bits real?” Steve is so overwhelmed.“What bit?”“The us bit.”“Oh yeah. A major professional indiscretion on my part.” Bucky doesn’t sound remotely regretful. Or phased.“Huh?”“You’re not really meant to fuck the people you’re paid to protect. It’s not very professional.”Steve laughs at the absurdity of the situation and shakes his head.“Well then we’re both unprofessional. If I wasn’t so broken I’d fuck you right now.”“Assassins on motorbikes shooting guns get you hot?”“It might just be this one.” Steve manages a smile.Bucky kisses him again, long and slow and Steve is getting harder. This is ridiculous. But the adrenaline is returning, making him forget about his broken body, and he moves against Bucky, fucking against his leg, his hip.“Ah fuck, Steve.” Bucky’s eyes roll, and he rocks right back.They kiss wet and sloppy and rut against each other, fucking into each other’s slippy thighs. Steve can really see Bucky like this, all of him, his long, hard, fucking gorgeous body, not just bits and pieces like when they fuck.Bucky’s clawing at his back and Steve groans.“Steeve,” he groans and Steve knows he needs more than this.He pushes Bucky forward against the tiles. Bucky goes easy.“Urgh fuck, Steve you...sure? Don’t hurt yourself!”“You’re desperate baby, look at you.”“No but you’re hurt and...”“So we’ll go nice and slow.”Bucky groans.“I hate slow.”“Tough luck. Open your legs.”Steve stares. He can’t quite put together the superhuman assassin Bucky, the cock tease Bucky, and the Bucky who just completely submits to him. At the slightest suggestion.“Fuck, look at you.” Steve groans, grabbing lube from the cabinet, wincing at the movement, but forgetting all about the pain as he gets back and sees Bucky against the white tiles with his legs spread, both arms bracing himself against the wall. Exactly how he left him.“Jesus Christ.”“Don’t use your fingers.”“What?”“Just lube up your dick and fuck me open,” Bucky rasps. “I need it.”Steve swears but does as he’s told, coating his rock hard dick and spreading Bucky’s cheeks with his thumbs. Bucky squeaks as Steve’s thumbs graze his asshole. Steve groans again.He isn’t sure if this is gonna work but Bucky seems confident. He pushes the head of his dick against Bucky’s asshole and Bucky gasps.“Yeah yeah yeah, push, push, work me open with it.”Steve groans at his dirty mouth, and the tight heat he pushes into.“Yeah, come on, I can take it. Make me take your dick, I’ll stretch for you, made for you, Stevie.”“You stop talking or I’ll come right away.”“I’d kill you.”Steve laughs.“Nah, spent too much time tonight saving me.”Bucky laughs.He pushes forward and back, stretching, slow, just like he said, that blissful fucking heat, feeling the muscles slowly give, slowly let him in. Bucky’s whimpering, and Steve kisses his shoulder, bites. Reaches up Bucky’s abs and pecs as he fucks him slow, pinching his nipples, grabbing at his muscles.“Take it so good Buck, ugh,” Steve groans as he finally bottoms out.“Steve,” Bucky whimpers.A lethal weapon. Pliant and begging inbetween his legs. Steve moves slow, just like he said, careful to get the angle, without hurting himself too bad. Cos it is hurting. But damned if he isn’t gonna give Bucky what he needs. Especially when it’s his dick. He slowly strokes Bucky’s dick in time, pinching the base whenever he gets close, making Bucky squeal.“Please, fuck, Steve, I need.”“Mmm, I know, you wanna get on top? Ride it out?”“Yes, fuck, yes,” he turns, bleary eyed, and all but carries a dripping Steve out to the bedroom. He shoves a towel on the bed and gently lowers Steve down. Steve still winces, but he thinks he manages to hide it.Bucky gets on top, impales himself immediately, and proceeds to ride Steve like he’s a fucking dildo. Steve knows it’s hurting his ribs, but it’s hurting so far away from the tight heat on his cock and wet naked Bucky getting himself off. Bucky’s pumping his dick, jerking himself off and grinning, eyes rolling back in his head.“Best, fucking, dick, I’ve ever had, Rogers.”Steve groans, feeling utterly fucking used, and loving it. He gasps as Bucky clenches round his dick, shoves himself down, and comes, squirting hard over his stomach. Steve gets close, his impending orgasm overriding his pain and he grabs Bucky’s hips and pulls him down, over and over again, until Bucky near weeping at over stimulation, the relentless pressure on his prostate.Steve wants to suck him, suck his soft cock until he gets hard again and make him come again and see if he can make him sob, coming so raw it hurts. Another day, maybe.He comes hard inside him and groans loud. Steve side is screaming at him to stop so Steve does, letting Bucky slip off him and to the side.“I wanna feel it,” Steve says.He’s adrenaline delirious, that’s his only excuse for such a filthy urge.“Huh?”Steve pushes open Bucky’s legs, despite Steve’s body protesting in pain, and shoves his fingers inside Bucky. Bucky yelps. Steve wants to feel how he’s stretched him, his come inside him, wants to stroke that sensitive spot till Bucky fucking weeps.“Steve,” Bucky whimpers.“Gonna stay right here till you come again.”“Steve you...need to...rest... Oh, oh, oh,” Bucky groans.“Yeah, like it there baby, huh? My favourite little spot?”Bucky’s lips are open. Staring at him like he’s gone nuts.“Yeah, but, Steve, it’s...”Steve leans forward and with his other hand pushes two fingers inside Bucky’s mouth.“Suck on me, sweetheart. Make you feel better.”Bucky’s eyes are wide but he does as he’s told and Steve groans.He pushes another finger inside Bucky and he yelps.“Yeah, nice and stretched out huh? Mmm, like me filling you up?”He can’t answer with Steve’s fingers in his mouth and Steve groans. He doesn’t know what’s come over him. But fuck. It’s hot.He circles, pushes, right on that spot over and over and a tear runs down Bucky’s cheek.“Crying baby? It that good?” He takes his fingers out Bucky’s mouth and Bucky groans.“Steve, I can’t, I can’t, I’ve never...”“Oh you can, I’m gonna keep going until you come, you’re gonna be sobbing cos it feels so good.”Bucky whimpers. Steve kisses him softly, nibbles on his lips, sucks, finds Bucky’s dick with his other hand.It’s half hard, and his whole body jerks as Steve takes it in hand and starts to stroke.“Uhhh,” Bucky’s eyes are losing focus.Steve kisses him slow, strokes slow, with both his hands, till Bucky is a pliant whimpering mess in his arms.“Good, look at you. So fucking hot Buck.”He takes his hands back and sits up against the bed frame. He pats his lap. Bucky sees Steve’s hard dick and gets up there immediately.“Gonna have to work for it again, yeah? Turn away from me this time. That’s it. Come sit in my lap baby.”Bucky’s shaking but does as he’s told, about to slide himself down, and then sees the mirror opposite the bed.“Oh shit,” he gasps. He takes a deep breath, then lowers himself down.He squeals. It’s such a perfect sound.“Yeah?” Steve coos.Every few bounces up and down Bucky gets overwhelmed by the sensation and pauses, gasping for breath, and every time he does Steve pulls him down hard, grinding against his prostate. Not letting him take a break.Tears are running down Bucky’s face. Steve can see it in the mirror. He’d be worried if his face wasn’t the picture of fucking contorted pleasure. If he hadn’t wanted to make him sob with pleasure anyway. Bucky’s hard dick bobs in front of him.“Fuck, oh fuck, Steve,” he pants. “I think... I think...”“Mm, told you, knew you got another one in you. You gotta get me off first. Get me off with your tight little ass then you can come.”Bucky makes a strangled noise but does his damn best, bouncing on Steve’s dick, going fast, hard, squealing at the overstimulation.“Good, yeah, baby just like that. Don’t stop, Buck, that’s perfect. Keep it up. Work for me baby, yeah,”Bucky’s gritting his teeth. Clearly so close.“Now baby, we’re gonna come together but not touching you’re dick, okay?”Bucky looks like he might be about to snap but swallows, nods, fucks himself hard and fast.“Come on, Buck, get yourself off, you deserve it, you’re so good baby.”“I can’t, I can’t…” he groans in frustration.“Mmm you can, relax.”He pinches Bucky’s nipple without warning and Bucky yells, coming hard and sudden.“FUCK!”Steve groans, pulling Bucky down hard, fucking into him relentlessly, not letting him escape a single second.Bucky’s screaming and Steve starts to come. He yells as he does grabbing a fistful of Bucky’s hair and biting down on his neck.“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” he’s still holding Bucky tight, fucking him hard, and Bucky is keening.They gasp back air, and Steve groans in pain as he comes back to himself and curls up on himself.“Oh god that was dumb,” Steve says.Bucky swears and jumps right off him.“Shit, shit, you okay? I shouldn’t have don’t that, that was stupid, wait lemme get you some pain killers.”Steve is trying to process all the things he just said. Just did.Bucky is pressing pills into his mouth and holding up a glass of water. Steve swallows.“I’m sorry I...” Steve blinks, blushing hard. Remembering all the shit he just did. He’s fucked in the head.“Steve that was so fucking hot. Don’t apologise.” Bucky shudders. “You make me feel so good I swear to god.”“Uh. I wanted to watch you sob. That’s fucked up.”Bucky laughs.“No, Steve. You wanted to get me off so hard that I sobbed. That’s different. That’s hot.”Steve wasn’t convinced.“Besides. Adrenaline and life death situations make everyone nuts. Haven’t you ever seen Speed?”“No?”“Jesus Christ.”They lay quietly for a while.“You’re confident we’re safe here?” Steve says eventually. Sensibility catching up with him.“Yes. It’s Tony’s villa. It’s secure. It’s why I was so surprised about the fucking raccoons.”Steve shook his head at the memory.“I think I wanna go home tomorrow,” Steve says quietly.Bucky nods.“Yeah, course. I’ll get the flights sorted in the morning. Get back home and get you checked over in the hospital. And I think get you some proper security. If you’re okay with that.”Steve nods. The pain killers are making him a little giddy.“And I’ll have to move in with you of course, to keep you safe.” Bucky says it with a completely straight face and Steve laughs.He doesn’t object. He knows they’ve only been on holiday for two weeks, but he can’t imagine living without him in his house now. God knows he basically lived in Steve’s pockets anyway with the job.“Well. At least I know who you are now. Mystery assassin. No more dark secrets.”A look of guilt flashes over Bucky’s face. Steve raises an eyebrow.“Oh.” Steve’s stomach sinks. “You’re not married, are you?” He tries to make light of it. After everything.Bucky sighs.“No, it’s just, I’ll tell you in the morning.”Steve shakes his head. He can’t bear it.“No. Now. No more secrets.”Bucky sighs.“Alright. Alright fine. But you’re gonna think I’m a freak.”Steve frowns then positively gapes as Bucky moves his hand to his opposite shoulder and... Peels the fucking skin off. Steve’s already addled mind can’t take it. Bucky is revealing a sleek metal as what he can only imagine is fake silicone skin is peeled off.“You’re a robot?”Bucky’s face contorts in laughter.“Oh my god. Are you high off that shit already? It’s just a robotic arm. I’m not a fucking robot. Robots aren’t real. I mean they’re real but...robot people aren’t realm.” Bucky tries to contain the laughter that has overtaken him when he was obviously so terrified of telling Steve. “The rest of me is normal.”“Oh, I see. Just a robotic arm.” Steve stares.“Its a weaponised prosthetic,” Bucky says.“Can I touch it?”“Sure.” Bucky is watching very carefully for Steve’s reaction.Steve runs his fingers over the smooth metal.“I can feel through it. Sensation, hot, cold, sharp, all of it.”“Holy fuck. You lose your arm in the army or?”Bucky gives a bitter laugh.“Oh no. Arm was fine before. They decided I could be ‘improved’.”“Holy fuck, I’m so sorry.”“Well, they were real sorry too. After.” Bucky shrugs. “Now I quite like it. It’s strong. It used to hurt where it joined at the shoulder but Tony fixed it up. Said it was cheap military shit.”“Fuck. Why do you cover it up?”Bucky shrugs.“Too identifiable. There’s people still out there look for me. I could handle them if they found me, but I’d rather avoid the blood shed.”Steve stares some more.“How’d you get through the airport?”Bucky laughs.“That’s your question? I don’t know how it works, it’s something the army did.”“Fuck.” Steve needs to ask him something. It’s a terrible question to ask he knows. Still wants to ask it.“Ask me. I don’t mind. Whatever it is.”“How many men have you killed?”Bucky doesn’t wince like Steve thought he would.“I stopped keeping count after 100.”“Jesus Christ.” No wonder he’d barely broken a sweat today dropping the guys from the cartel.“It’s not nice, my history. I do the best I can now to look after good people, only kill the bad guys, but... I.” He sighs. “I know I’m nuts, I know I get the PTSD shit at night sometimes. I know I did unforgivable shit back then. I understand if you don’t want this with me anymore. But I hope you’ll still let me protect you Steve cos, I don’t mean to be cocky but... I’m the best. And I want the best protecting you.”Steve feels like his heart might explode. He kisses him.“I still want this with you.”Bucky stares at him.“Are you sure?”“Yeah. But put me on a motorbike again and I’ll never fucking forgive you.”Bucky smirks at him and his eyes light up.“Motorbikes are fun.”Steve closes his eyes. “I’m in love with a maniac.”“Yeah, sorry about that.”Steve laughs.“I think I need to sleep.”“Yeah, you go to sleep. I won’t. Too wired. But I’ll be here.”He goes to pull the fake skin cover back over the prosthetic.“You don’t have to, you know.” Steve says sleepily. “Don’t mind it.”Bucky smiles, tosses the cover off the side of the bed and curls up against Steve.Steve’s almost asleep when Bucky whispers in his ear.“I love you too, boss.”Steve smiles.*Steve has never given someone such as telling off as he is Tony on the phone the next day. Unfortunately Tony doesn’t seem to understand that he’s being told off.“What? A fucking cartel? Are you serious? Steve are you okay? Is Bucky there? Put him on.”“Tony, you lied to me!”“Put him on the phone!”“You knew my life was in danger and you didn’t tell me!”“I did tell you, idiot, you just wouldn’t listen. Put Bucky on.”Steve groans and gives the phone to Bucky across the breakfast table.“Hey Tony,” Bucky says casually, carrying on eating his pancakes one handed. “Mhmm. Mhmm. ‘s fine. Sore. Minor injuries. Had to ditch the truck, sorry. Villas fine. Mhmm. Yeah. I can’t get a lead on it from here, it’s probably – yeah that’s what I thought. Okay, you sure? I was gonna just book us on the next flight back? Okay. Okay. Got it.”Steve’s side hurts. Despite the painkillers. They are amazing but laughing is still agony. Coughing is even worse.  His stomach hurts. He has the worst headache he’s ever had in his life. Bucky basically had to carry him down the stairs to breakfast.Bucky hangs up, frowns at Steve’s wincing.“Take some more painkillers.” He says, chucking Steve the bottle. “Tony’s sending the jet.”“The jet? Jesus he’s so ridiculous. I didn’t even know he had a jet.”“Course he does. He’s a millionaire playboy. I think they just give you one once you get that status.”Steve shakes his head.“Private jets are horrendous for the environment and – “Bucky holds up his hand.“Stop. Just this one time, okay, you’re in agony, your life is probably still in danger. We’re letting Tony take us in the jet.”Steve sighs and gives in.“No one can see me get on or off it,” he says quietly. “It’ll destroy our campaigns.”Bucky laughs.“I’m serious.”“I know you are. And it’s so cute I’d beg you to let me suck you if you weren’t in such a mess.”Steve bites his lip and thinks about it.“No,” Bucky says. “Stop it. Eat your breakfast. Take two of those tablets. I’m gonna pack.”Steve grumbles but does as he’s told, carefully eating his breakfast. Swallowing kind of hurts too. He gulps down the tablets.Everything packed into suitcases already, Bucky must have done it overnight. Steve feels a pull of sadness as he limps out to the taxi with Bucky’s help, one hand on his side, trying to keep the pain at bay. Mexico was supposed to be a blissful holiday, a break, a paradise. Not where he found out there was a price on his head.“God we need to get you checked out. You sure you’re gonna make it to the plane?”“Yeah, yeah.”Steve falls asleep in the car against Bucky, the meds making him drowsy. He realises as he falls asleep he didn’t even ask Bucky what the meds were he was feeding him like candy. When Steve wakes up he’s on the jet. He jolts awake and sees Tony sat opposite him, grinning. It’s a horrifying way to wake up.“He lives! Hallelujah!”“Bucky?” Steve looks around the tiny plane anxiously, not seeing any sign of him.“Calm down, Rogers. He’s in the bathroom. Jesus, you two got clingy real quick, huh?”Tony is in a sharp cut suit, holding a bourbon and ice in an elegant cut glass tumbler, his facial hair is even more sculpted than Steve remembered it.“You can come check him out now, he’s awake.” Tony calls.A man and a woman come over to him holding medical kit.“What…”“They’re doctors, Steve. Bucky said you took a hell of a beating. You need to be checked over.”Steve groans but answers their questions and lets them prod and poke him. Bucky comes out the bathroom just as they make their way over and stands back, letting them do their thing. Bucky is watching carefully, listening to every word they say as they check Steve over.“Broken ribs, we’ll need to do a proper scan when we get back, some more checks when we land, otherwise looks okay. Here.”The woman gives him another tablet and some water. Steve takes it. They go back to their seats and Bucky slides down in their place, pulling Steve to him and stroking his hair. Steve is too doped up to care about the amused look Tony’s giving them.“Shit, you two are cute.”Pepper comes down from the front of the plane, she’s immaculately dressed as always in a grey suit, cream blouse, and heels.“Hey Pepper,” Steve can hear his voice slurring and cringes.She smiles at him.“Hi Steve.”“Are they not adorable?” Tony asks.“They are absolutely adorable,” she agrees, smiling at Bucky apologetically.“No this is good,” Steve says. His voice sounds far away. Hazy. “We can double date. You like to double date?”“Oh my god, Steve, you hate socialising,” Bucky reminds him.“Do I?” Steve is off his face. He needs to shut his mouth right now.“Yes.”“Baby. Baby I’m cold,” Steve mutters, lies his head down on Bucky’s chest.Bucky wraps his arms around him, pulls a blanket down off one of the overheads and wraps it round him.“Hm.” Steve says and passes out again.He only vaguely remembers getting off the plane. Into the car. Into the hospital. Bucky by his side constantly. His side is hurting so bad now he takes all the pain killers they offer him, and as such doesn’t remember much of getting back into his house.He only wakes to groan in pain and Bucky is giving him water, making him eat something, giving him more painkillers. He vaguely thinks there’s nurses in his bedroom, but isn’t sure if that’s real, isn’t sure if that’s nuts. Time seems to stretch. Day and night merging into one, the only constant being Bucky’s concerns blue eyes over him every time he wakes.Eventually he starts to come round.“Hey.” Bucky smiles wide, clearly seeing the alertness back in Steve’s eyes.“Hey.”“How you feeling?”“A bit better, still hurts, but okay. What…what did the doctors say?” Steve vaguely recalls being slid into a scanner.“Three broken ribs, bruised spleen, bruised liver, fractured your scull. Probably shouldn’t have fucked you in that state.”Steve laughs then winces at the pain.“Sorry,” Bucky apologises, comes over to sit on the side of the bed.“They were gonna keep you in hospital, but then decided we could probably keep a better eye on you here, security wise, so the nurses have been dropping in and I’ve been feeding you the pills they tell me to. They been giving you morphine, made you real sleepy. They decided to start easing off today cos they said you were doing a lot better.”“Mmm. Yeah. What day is it?”“It’s Wednesday. We’ve been back five days.”Steve blinks.“Huh.”“Can I get up?”“Sure, just go slow.”Bucky helps him to the side of the bed.“Shit I stink.”Bucky laughs.“Yeah, five days in bed’ll do that. If you manage it to the window we can try the shower after that.”“Shit, Buck, I’m hungry.”“Yeah, I bet. Okay come on.” Steve feels okay on his feet, and reassured by his lack of stumbling Bucky steps back and let’s him walk.They get to the window. New York is covered in snow. Steve has a penthouse apartment, and they look out the huge windows out over the white blanket of a city.“Looks cold.”“Sharp as ever, boss. Good to see.”Steve glares at him and Bucky laughs. Bucky leans forwards and kisses him.“Uh no, don’t, if I stink, I dread to think how my breath smells.”Bucky laughs.“Yeah, it’s pretty bad boss. Next step bathroom.”He’s feeling a whole lot better than when they got him on the plane. It only hurts when he really laughs, moving seems easier now. Sore, but easier.“Yeah, they said to take it easy. No energetic fucking.”Steve raises an eyebrow as they walk into the bathroom.“The doctor specifically said that?”“No vigorous activity. He looked at me specifically when he said it. Tony’s never going to shut up about it.”Steve groans.“Why was Tony there?”“He’s been over a lot. Keeps checking in on you. It’s like you made a friend or something Steve.”“Heaven forbid. I’m still pissed at him.”“For employing the person that saved your life?” Bucky drawls as he turns on the shower.Steve takes off his stinking pyjamas and makes a face.“Urgh.” He chucks them towards the laundry basket. “And it’s not the point, he lied to me.”“Did he though?”“Don’t you start siding with him, Barnes.”Bucky laughs. Steve steps under the waterfall shower and groans in relief. Bucky leans against the side one the shower, still clothed, hands away, behaving.“Get in here, Buck.”“He said no vigorous fucking!”“I’m not gonna – ““Hey, I know what you’re like boss. First it’s just a gentle wank in the shower, next thing I know you got me bent in half, pounding into me, and I can’t remember my own name.”Steve huffs, his dick hardening at Bucky’s words. He washes the soap out of his hair. Winces at the stretch.“Hurts. Need you to wash me.”“Bullshit.” Bucky rolls his eyes, but watches Steve getting half hard and gives in after less than a minute.He dumps his clothes on the floor. Steve grins.“Spoilt,” Bucky tuts at him, getting in opposite him and grabbing the conditioner. “Okay turn round.”Steve turns, smiling happily.He sighs as Bucky massages it into his hair. As he gets the shower gel and covers Steve in bubbles. Steve moans soft as his hands slide up his thighs. He discovers quick moaning load hurts.“They didn’t say anything about me sucking your dick though, I spose,” Bucky muses with teasing eyes, and drops to his knees.“Ah god, Buck, you really do spoil me.”“Mmm I know. But you keep still, don’t hurt yourself. I mean it this time.”Steve smiles.“Promise.”Bucky sucks him long and slow and Steve is floating away already in the blissful heat of Bucky’s mouth, the hot water pouring down on them both.It’s very hard not to move, but Steve is trying his damn best. He just wants to shove it in Bucky so bad. Wants to hear him moan. He gives a frustrated growl.“No. Keep still.”“I am keeping still.” Steve says, petulant.Bucky looks up at him, obviously hot for it now, but still that look of amusement in those playful blue eyes.Bucky gets up.“Tell you what. You brush your teeth, have a shave, come meet me back in the bedroom. We can make it work better there.”Steve groans but brushes his teeth and shaves faster than he’s ever done in his life. He dries himself off, hissing a couple of times at the pain, then makes it back into the bedroom.Bucky’s lying on his back on the bed, lazily stroking his dick and smiling at Steve.“Steve, why is your face bleeding?”“Slipped,” Steve mutters, stroking his own dick.“Sit back against the headboard. We’re gonna do this, but I got rules.”Steve smirks.“Yeah? Sounds fun.”Steve sit back obediently.“The rules are: you stay still. Properly still. No hands. No mouth. Still. Strip clubs rules. No touching. Hands flat on the bed.”“I don’t think I like this game.”“It’s this or nothing, baby.”Steve groans and nods.“Kay, Kay.”“You gotta wait, gotta get myself ready. Hands. On the bed.”Steve gulps. Does as he’s told. Watches Bucky get the lube out his drawer. Lay on his back at the other end of the bed. He pulls his legs up to show Steve exactly what he’s doing. As his fingers slide inside.Steve groans.“Bucky, oh my god, baby.”“Stay.”Steve groans. Watches Bucky spread himself open on his fingers. Stroking his hard dick with his other hand.Steve swears. His self control has always been pretty good. Until it comes to Bucky.A third finger pushes in.“Oh fuck. Fuck. Bucky.”Bucky’s panting, grinning at Steve.“You’re enjoying this, you masochist.”Bucky laughs.“Hey, you’re the one that wanted to make me cry.”“That...wasn’t...” Steve stutters and Bucky laughs.“How many can you...” Steve watches entranced.“Four. By myself anyway.” He winks at Steve.“Uh,” Steve says.Bucky grins.Pushes in a fourth. Steve and Bucky groan at the same time. Bucky’s sweating now, panting, his dick hard, purple, and leaking.“Fuck. That’s so fucking hot Buck. Please, God, get over here.”Bucky moves over to him.“See I used to have this friend. He said this is best work out you can do.”Steve watches, trying to process what Bucky’s saying as he positions himself over Steve, his back to Steve’s chest, but not touching, hovering his over dick, his feet flat on the bed, hands holding the headboard.“Ready to help me with my work out, baby?”Steve groans, desperate to lean forward and kiss his neck. He keeps still.“You can guide your dick in, then that’s it.”Steve groans. Why is he the one that feels like he might cry now? He takes his dick, finds Bucky’s sweet hot hole and pushes.“Mm, that’s it. Put you hand back on the bed.”Steve does as he’s told. Bucky pushes down. Steve groans low. Bites his lip.“Oh shit Steve. Baby that’s so good. Missed you. Ohh yeah. I gotta get more practice in.” He starts to move slow, then picks up the pace.Steve tries desperately not to cry out. He can’t. It hurts. He just whimpers. Moans soft. Repeats Bucky’s name over and over as he rides his dick.Bucky’s right though, it doesn’t hurt, it’s isolated, the way Bucky moves, not thudding into him anywhere, just pure fucking bliss on his dick. But jesus. What a workout for Bucky. He’s bouncing up and down though like he could do it all fucking day.“Baby, I miss your face, come on turn round.”Bucky just keeps fucking himself in earnest, moaning and swearing like he can’t hear Steve at all.Steve groans.“Please, baby, please. I’ll keep still, I promise I won’t grab.”Bucky laughs.“Uh, you’re so hot when you beg for it, you know boss? What you begging for?”“I wanna see your face.”Bucky relents and slowly turns himself round.“No. Grabbing.”Steve nods too enthusiastically.Bucky starts riding him again and Steve’s traitorous hips jump.“No,” Bucky says firmly, holding his hips down and Steve groans. “You keep still.”“That’s hot. That’s hot. Fuck.”“You’re kinky under that sweet innocent face aren’t you Rogers? Like me bossing you around?”Steve splutters and blushes.“You keep those hips still, I won’t tell you again,” his voice goes harsh and Steve groans at the rush it sends through him. At how his hips are now glued to the mattress. “Baby you bet we are exploring that when you’re all better.”Steve groans, trying so hard to keep still. He’s getting close now, thanks to Bucky’s relenting rhythm. His perfect fucking ass. That perfect picture he makes riding his cock with his eyes going hazy and his mouth hanging open.“Baby. You look so fucking good,” Steve moans.“You ready? Cos I’m gonna come all over your lovely dick in a sec boss.”“Yes, fuck Bucky yes.”“Remember what I said. No moving.”Steve agrees like it’s easy. Then realises he has never attempted to keep still during an orgasm, let alone with someone like Bucky riding him through it all.It builds, so good, his body just wants to push up, just that little bit more. Wants to throw Bucky over and fuck him till he fucking weeps again. Instead he clings to the sheets, pretends he’s glued to the mattress and can’t move.  It’s impossible. But Bucky said. He had to stay still.He groans, he can’t even shout. Just whimper and swears and, yeah okay, screams for just the last bit, as it coils in his belly, Bucky’s dick clenches round Steve’s dick and he yells out, watching as Bucky comes long thick strings over Steve’s stomach. Steve yells out as he comes. Bucky grins, riding through it, pushing himself down so he gets just that spot and yells out again, another spurt of come coming from his twitching dick.  Bucky gets off him straight away, cleans him up, then carefully slots himself into. Steve’s good side.“You can touch now.”Steve swears and his hands fly over Bucky, but not straining himself. Bucky was right, it didn’t hurt at all like that. Just made Steve want to scream in all the other ways. But it was hot. He wasn’t sure he was ready to tell Bucky that though.Steve’s stroking Bucky’s hair when he realises a new wardrobe in the room that wasn’t there before.Bucky sees the direction Steve is looking.“I moved my stuff in.”Steve grins. He can’t help it. It spreads across his face and probably makes him look like a maniac.Bucky laughs.“I’m glad you’re still feeling the same about that. Wasn’t sure if you were off your tits when you said it.”“Might have been. Still meant it.”“We got cameras all round outside now, we got security outside on the door, I know you didn’t want it, but we gotta be careful.”Steve shudders. Memories of a bag going over his head intruding.“Its okay, your safe, you’re safe with me I promise.” Bucky kisses his shoulder, clearly seeing the shift on his face. “I got you. I stashed a lot of weapons here. I hope you don’t mind. I doubt anyone would dare touch you here, but I wanna be sure.”Steve nods. It feels weird, before he would have flatly refused. He hates guns. But after what happened...he guesses he’d had a brutal reality check.“And I know you might hate it, but Tony signed you up for post trauma counselling.”“It is... Probably a good idea.” Steve forces out, he felt like it hadn’t hit him fully yet, and he knew you had to be careful with that stuff.“Good.” Bucky kissed him again.“Did you find out who put the hit out on me?”“You really wanna know?”“Yeah.” If he didn’t find out he’d be suspecting everyone that shook his hand.“Yeah. Think it was a guy named Pierce, big backer of one of the oil companies. Associated with this Hydra trust, which sounds weirdly familiar, from my... Previous career. Which is never a good sign. I need to look it up.”Steve shudders.“Police are looking into it. Dunno if they’ll do anything.”Steve cuddles up to Bucky tighter.“I got you. Don’t you worry. You got the best bodyguard now. But I’m not singing the song.”“What song?”“Jesus Christ. Sometimes I think you live on a different planet, boss.”Steve’s stomach rumbles.“Hey Buck, now you’re my boyfriend, do I get pancakes in bed?”Bucky smirks.  “Sure. I’ll bring up extra maple syrup.”  He winks at Steve and gets up out the bed.“Stay there.” Bucky says as he pulls on his clothes.Steve rolls his eyes.“Yeah, I got it, stay.”Bucky smirks at him.“I’ll bring a dog collar up with your pancakes.”Steve rolls his eyes at Bucky’s back as he leaves the room. Then he notices it. Bucky’s slippers are by the end of the bed. His phone charger is plugged into the other side of Steve’s bed. His book is on the nightstand. His dressing gown hung on the back of the door.Steve’s heart flips, sings, and grabs his phone. He pulls up Tony’s number. Ignores all the messages he’s sent him asking how he is and to text when he gets back from his trip to morphine land.Compose New message: Thank you Tony x <3