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The mug is hot against Theo’s skin as he holds it in both hands. His eyes stare down at it, watching as the steam billows into the air before him. He brings the mug to his lips and takes a long drink, closing his eyes as the warm liquid glides down his throat.When he opens them again, they fix on the clock across the room.Just after three o’clock in the morning.He should be in bed fast asleep, but instead, he’s sitting in the kitchen on his third cup of tea, hoping it will be enough to relax him. Zac swears by the stuff— says it’s the only thing that can calm him after a long day.But it does nothing for Theo.He can’t remember the last time he slept. Days maybe? Possibly weeks? It’s been a while since he’s been able to doze for more than a few hours at a time, and his body is starting to show the signs. There are bags under his eyes, his muscles ache, and he just feels off . He can’t explain it.He can tell Zac is worried, too. He’s been watching him closely lately, or closer than usual. Theo takes another drink and closes his eyes again. He puts the mug on the table and puts his head in his hands. How long before he just gives up on getting any sleep tonight and switches to coffee?“What are you doing up?”Theo flinches back at the hand that touches his shoulder before he looks up to see Zac standing next to him. Zac raises his hands in front of him. “Sorry. I thought you heard me.”“I was distracted,” Theo mumbles.“Right,” Zac says. He slides into the chair next to him and frowns over at him. “Want to talk about it?”“There’s nothing to talk about,” Theo says. “I just can’t fucking sleep and nothing is helping.”“Because your mind won’t shut off,” Zac guesses.“Yeah.”“So, maybe if you talk about whatever’s bothering you, it’ll help,” Zac says. “I’m not saying you have to talk to me, but you need to talk to someone, Theo. You can’t keep going on like this.”“I know!” Theo says. He jumps to his feet and turns towards the window, away from Zac. Theo sees a face in the glass for a moment, and he stumbles back. His hand flies to his chest, and he shakes his head. “She just keeps coming.”“Theo,” Zac says gently. “There’s no one there.”“But she is!” Theo says. “She’s always there. Every damn time I sleep, she’s waiting for me. I thought— when we moved here, away from Beacon Hills, it stopped, but now she’s back. And I don’t know how to make her stop.”Zac puts a hand on his arm, and Theo crumbles. He falls into his arms and buries his face in his chest, keeping his eyes looking anywhere but the window. He’s sure he’ll be embarrassed about falling apart like this in the morning, but right now, he’s so tired and worn down that he can’t fight back the sobs that force their way out of him.“I just want her to stop.”“She can’t get you here, Theo,” Zac says, rubbing a hand down his back. “You’re safe here. I’ve got you.”“But I can’t let her get to you,” Theo says, pulling back enough to look at him.“Is that what worries you?” Zac asks him. “That she’ll go after someone you care about?”“Yes,” Theo says. “But not— not just anyone. You , Zac.”“Why me?” Zac questions.Theo’s saying too much. He knows he is. He should just shut up and stop this conversation now. But it’s like a damn has broken inside of him, and he can’t stop the words from pouring out. “Because she knows how I feel about you,” Theo says.Zac rests his head against Theo’s and sighs. “I probably shouldn’t be asking you this when you’re in the middle of a breakdown, but if it’ll help the both of us get some sleep… how do you feel, Theo?”“I—” Theo trails off. The words are there, on the tip of his tongue, but it’s hard to get them out. Especially since he’s never said them before and actually meant them. Not like he would now. And that’s what scares him. Saying them will make it more real and put Zac in more danger. But Zac is here, waiting patiently— his face open and vulnerable. Theo owes them both to do the same. “I love you.”Zac smiles and brushes the tears from his cheeks. “I love you, too, Theo.”“But don’t you see how dangerous it is?” Theo asks him. “She could come for you, Zac. Anyone that wants to hurt me could. And I can’t—”“I don’t care,” Zac says. “I’m not going to spend my life being afraid, Theo. I left Beacon Hills to get away from that. And I know you did, too. We’re safe here. We have a life. I’m not going to stop living it and not let myself have the things I want just because something could happen in the future. In fact, that’s all the more reason to go after what we want.”“I hate it when you talk sense,” Theo mutters.Zac chuckles and kisses his nose. “I know you do. But you know I’m right.”“I know,” Theo says. “I just don’t know what I would do if anything ever happened to you.”“You won’t have to find out,” Zac says. “Not for a long, long time, when we’re both old and grey.”“You really think we got that long?”“I do,” Zac says. “Because I’m going to fight for it.”Theo nods and takes a deep breath. “Me too.”Theo’s world stops for a moment when Zac leans in and kisses him softly, only to kick back in again, the colors swirling a little brighter around him. “Do you think you could sleep?” Zac asks him. “I could try,” Theo says.“Good,” Zac says. He pulls back and holds out his hand towards Theo.“Then let’s go to bed.”Theo slides his hand into Zac’s and lets him guide him down the hall to his room. Zac crawls into bed and moves over, leaving space for Theo. He opens his arms and raises an eyebrow. “Theo?”Theo crawls in beside him, and Zac pulls him into his arms, maneuvering them until they’re both comfortable. Theo is curled against him with his head on Zac’s chest, and their legs tangled together. He still expects sleep to evade him, but it doesn’t. Theo sleeps that night for the first time in weeks, and the only person he dreams of is Zac.