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The apartment was perfect, on that both of them could agree. The bedrooms were spacious, the whole place was well ventilated and the windows were large enough so the sunlight could reach the entirety of every room. Adam could remember very well when Gansey invited him to share a place, both of them freshly graduated and well employed, and in any other moment of his life that would be a big no from him. At that point, however, he was being paid generously, which made it possible to share evenly with Gansey every bill and all the groceries, and even though Gansey was still immensely richer than him, Adam could live comfortably on his own money. The fact that he didn’t
need
to live with Gansey to survive made it possible for him to admit that he would love to share space with his best friend.
Gansey was gaping at everything and pointing out every single thing about the place that made it perfect for both of them. It was kind of cute, actually, and Adam had to hide the smile that formed on his face at the sight.
“I could place my Henrietta miniature here, what do you think?”
Adam looked at the place.
“Yeah, sounds good.”
Their potential landlady looked at them with judgment while they explored the place. Adam was still a little lost at their living situation – three women who seemed to be in a polyamorous relationship and their daughter owned the small building with three apartments above an esoteric shop they also owned. One of the apartments belonged to them, the second one was owned by one of them's sister and daughter and the other was up for rent. The woman with them was called Calla and she didn’t seem to like them very much. She was not impressed by anything that used to be the object of admiration from other people – Gansey’s million dollar charisma or upbringing, Adam’s southern charm, their Harvard degrees and handsome looks. Actually, she seemed to find them the most stupid, annoying people she had the displeasure to meet.
“So, what do you think?”, Gansey asked him. “It’s perfect, isn’t it?”
“Yes, it meets all of our needs.”
Gansey opened his presidential smile before turning to Calla.
“We love it. We’re going to keep it.”
Calla released a long sigh before looking at them.
“Well, it’s a pity, really, because we can’t rent it for you.”
Adam and Gansey exchanged a confused look, frowning.
“Why not?”, Adam asked.
“We have a policy, you see. We decided we want to keep the building a family environment, so we’ll only rent it for couples and families. So, unless you are married, it’s not gonna happen.”
Well,
Adam thought,
you could have said that before we fell in love with the place.
He looked at Gansey, regretful, and any word that was about to leave his mouth died inside of it, because Gansey looked pensive. More than that, he looked
scheming
, and Adam knew better than to interrupt.
Before he could even question it, Gansey grabbed his hand and smiled brightly at Calla.
“Well, does soon to be married count?”
Adam schooled his expression to a neutral one, trying to suppress the shock at Gansey’s certain madness. Surely he wasn’t trying to do what Adam thought he was trying to do, right?
Calla looked at them with skepticism.
“You are engaged?”
“We are! We’ve been together since high school, you see, and then we shared a dorm in Harvard, but two years ago I asked his hand in marriage and we've been planning everything since then! Of course sharing a dorm gives some perspective, but we want to actually live together before getting married next year.”
“So you’re getting married next year?”
“If everything goes according to plan, and it will, yes.”
Calla looked at them for a very long time, clearly measuring them up, before saying at last:
“I’ll talk to Maura and Persephone and we’ll contact you with the answer.”
Adam was able to mumble a “Thanks, ma’am” before they left the place and, once they were safely in Gansey’s shitty orange Camaro, Adam looked at him and exclaimed:
“Gansey,
what the fuck?
”
His friend looked at him almost casually.
“What? The apartment is perfect, we both agreed.”
“Yes, but for you to lie about us to get it?”
“Since when do you care about lying? Are you Ronan now?”
Adam made a face.
“I don’t care about lying, but I thought you did.”
Adam wasn’t able to recognize the look on Gansey’s face when he said that.
“I could give you a run for your money.”
“I’m not one to bet, but if you say so.”
“It might not even work out anyway. The landladies might decide that us being engaged is not enough for their ‘family policy’.”
Adam smiled at that.
“One could say three women in a polyamorous relationship wouldn’t care so much about family.”
“One could say they would care even more.”
Adam stopped to think about it.
“Agree to disagree.”
And then they left, not really expecting to receive a call back from their potential landladies.
Except they did. Adam did, specifically, since they left his phone number with the women, so he received a call at an ungodly hour in the morning in which a soft female voice greeted him as if she hadn’t just woken him up.
“You and your fiance can have the apartment”, she said.
For a second his sleepy brain couldn’t remember the “engaged couple” facade, but soon he caught up and could answer in a rational way, despite his drowsy voice.
“Oh, really? That’s– that’s great, really great. When can we move in?”
“Any time next week would be okay.”
“Alright, I’ll talk to him and we’ll be in touch to schedule the day. Thank you so much!”
He decided to text Gansey about it in a more decent hour.
They finally moved in and everything couldn’t be more perfect. They decided to invite their best friends Ronan and Noah for a little get together in celebration and, once they told them about their little play pretend, Ronan spent some good thirty minutes laughing uninterruptedly. Noah only smiled.
“Well, the two of you are an old married couple already, so what’s the difference, uh?”
“Hey, we’re not!”, Adam protested. Ronan wiped a tear before saying his opinion.
“No, you are. Sometimes you look more like a couple than Noah and I, and we are actually dating.”
Gansey rolled his eyes in Adam’s direction.
“They can’t be serious to save their lives.”
“Why do you think they get along so well?”
“Oh, for fuck’s sake”, Ronan complained, but they dropped the case and they changed the subject.
Slowly, Gansey and Adam got to meet the other people who lived in the building. Their two other landladies were Persephone and Maura, the first one with long, fluffy white hair and black eyes, a very sweet, even if odd woman, and the second a woman with dark hair and skin called Maura who seemed to share Calla’s suspicions and disdain for them. They also met Jimi and Orla, Maura’s sister and niece who lived in the second apartment and looked much more friendly than the other women (in Orla’s case, way too friendly).
And then there was Blue.
Blue was the landladies’ daughter and, Adam had to admit, really pretty. She was small and skinny, with dark skin, hair and eyes, and she was always wearing something that seemed to be handmade by her. He saw her a few times before he came to actually talk to her and, in these few times, the only thing he could muster about her was that she was a pretty girl on the more eccentric side.
And then he was leaving with Gansey for groceries and Blue was arriving with the mail. She opened a smile in Gansey’s direction, not even looking in Adam’s way.
“ ‘Sup, Gansey.”
Gansey smiled back.
“Morning, Jane. Is there any mail for us?”
“Nope. That or I’m stealing your mail, who knows.”
Only then she seemed to notice Adam there.
“Hey, I don’t think we met. I’m Blue.”
Adam frowned in confusion.
“I thought I heard Jane.”
Blue rolled her eyes, but she was smiling.
“Just an inside joke.”
An inside joke?
“...right. I’m Adam Parrish, Gansey’s fiance.”
Adam didn’t know why he felt the need to add that information at the end, but he felt a little satisfaction at seeing Blue’s eyebrows raise.
“Oh, really?”
“Yep”, he smiled. “We’re getting married next year.”
“Uh, that’s really cool”, she didn’t sound like she found that cool at all. “Have a good day, the two of you.”
And she left. Adam decided he didn’t like Blue.
“Did you really have to tell her about the engagement?”, Gansey asked once they were out of the building.
“What, were you planning on fucking our landladies’ daughter, thus exposing our fake relationship and making us be kicked out of the perfect apartment?”
“...I didn’t think that way.”
Adam rolled his eyes fondly.
“Of course you didn’t. Listen, there’s a lot of pretty girls like that who won’t put our living situation at risk. Focus on them, okay?”
Gansey sighed.
“Yes, of course.”
Obviously it wouldn’t be that easy to set Gansey and Blue apart. Less than a week later, Adam came home from work to find the woman on his doorstep talking excitedly with his best friend. Gansey was smiling kindly to Blue, but his face was lit up by Adam’s sight. He pretended Gansey’s excitement didn’t make something funny in his stomach.
“Good afternoon”, he said politely for the two of them, the confusion about the situation clear on his face.
“Adam, hi! Blue came to ask for a bit of sugar and we ended up lost in conversation.”
Adam smiled coldly.
“It happens to the best of us. Why don’t you go fetch the sugar for her, dear?”
It was funny to call Gansey that, but they had to
keep the facade. He could see the mischievous glint in Gansey’s eyes and he knew he would be teased for that later.
“Of course”, and maybe to beat him at his own game, Gansey gave him a peck on Adam’s cheek before leaving for the kitchen.
He knew he was probably blushing by the interaction and, if Blue’s face was any indication, his suspicions were correct.
“It’s cute how you still blush when he kisses your cheek.”
Adam raised his brows at the comment.
“Gansey is really cute, that’s all.”
“That he is.”
Adam didn’t like the tone of the comment.
“I feel really lucky we’re gonna marry in a year. Although we’re basically married already.”
Blue was going to say something when Gansey came back with the sugar.
“Here it is. Whenever you need something, don’t hesitate to ask.”
“I’ll remember that. See you around, guys.”
After she left, Adam looked at Gansey, exasperated.
“Didn’t I tell you to stay away from Blue?”
Gansey frowned.
“I’m not flirting with her.”
“But she’s flirting with you. And, by the looks of it, she’s 100% ready to be a homewrecker if it means she’s going to have you.”
Gansey laughed at that.
“She wouldn’t be a homewrecker because we’re not really together, Adam.”
“Well, she doesn’t know that, and that’s what matters.” Adam sighed and looked straight to Gansey. “Gans. Blue has ‘trouble’ spelled all over her pretty face. Stop encouraging her and go after girls who won’t make us homeless.”
Gansey smiled at him while looking at him intently.
“If I didn’t know better, I would say you’re feeling jealous of Jane.”
Adam gasped at the accusation.
“I’m not jealous! And stop calling her that, that’s weird.”
Gansey only laughed at Adam’s answer, which just made him feel even more mad.
Adam found out about the weird arrangement in rent around three months living in their shared apartment. He was leaving to buy some ice cream and Persephone left her apartment, and the two of them went down the stairs together in an awkward silence. Persephone was the first one to break it.
“You should visit the shop one of these days. I could make you a reading.”
Adam didn’t know how to say to the nicest landlady out of the three that he was a complete skeptical regarding anything supernatural and that she should try her luck with Gansey instead, since he was much more interested in such subjects and way more willing to spend his money in something so superfluous. He was about to invent some excuse when the older woman spoke again.
“You know, I won’t really charge anything for it. It’s in the lease.”
“...is it?”
Persephone nodded.
“You can do one reading a month. We can also negotiate if you need more, of course.”
“...huh. Of course.”
When he asked Gansey if he knew of this little detail, he nodded enthusiastically.
“I’ve been doing my monthly reading since our first month here. I thought you did too?”
“No, I didn’t. Who does your readings?”
“Maura. Blue is there sometimes, it seems she’s some kind of amplifier for the psychics’ powers. How cool is that?”
Yeah, Blue is soooo cool, blah blah blah.
“Huh. It was Persephone who came to talk to me.”
“I think you should do it. I mean, you have nothing to lose.”
“Just some of my integrity… okay, I’ll think about it.”
He ended up accepting the advice and going after Persephone in the small esoteric shop under the apartments. Without asking him anything, she went to a shelf stuffed with weird objects and ended up choosing a crystal ball. It was small and fit perfectly inside the woman’s hands, and her eyes were focused on the ball when she questioned:
“What do you want to know?”
Adam didn’t really think about it.
“Uhhhh I’m not sure, to be honest? I didn’t stop to consider that there would be questions involved.”
Persephone went silent at that, eyes fixed on the object, and she was quiet for so long that Adam considered leaving when she began to speak.
“Life was not gentle to you. The people in your life who were supposed to love you only brought you pain and sorrow. For many years, you saw yourself as unlovable. Unknowable. You wore your wounds as a shield and hurt others in the process. You already received their forgiveness, it’s you who can’t forgive yourself.”
Adam was completely still. He was expecting some vague statements that could fit anyone’s perspective, but that felt… specific. Like the things only his closest friends knew.
“Things are better, though. You are not in the position of vulnerability you used to be. You are strong, you carry yourself with confidence. You have people who love you and who show it. You are not where you want to be yet, but that place seems much more achievable now than it was a few years ago.”
He could see himself in these words, although he kept telling himself that those words were not nearly specific enough. He knew they were, though.
“”Now, for the future… there’s someone on your way. They’ve been on your way for a while now, but you weren’t ready for them. You barely had enough love for yourself, how could you give it to others? Now things are different, you healed and matured, and you’re ready to give and accept love. This person is waiting, has been waiting for a while, and to this point they were satisfied with it. Not anymore, though. They are tired of waiting and, if you don’t act on it soon, you might lose them.”
“Who are they?”
Persephone slowly took her eyes off the crystal ball and looked at him instead.
“You know who.”
Adam frowned.
“No, I don’t. If I knew, I wouldn’t be asking.”
Persephone looked deep in his eyes, and Adam felt like he was staring at two black holes.
“You need to stop lying to yourself, Adam. No one else can do it for you.”
He closed himself in his room once he went back home. Gansey knocked to ask how the reading went and, once he only got silence, he went back to his life.
He didn’t like that reading. He didn’t like the truths he heard and he didn’t like how accurate everything was. Most of all, he disliked those cryptic words about someone who might love him and is about to give up on him. Persephone said he already knew, but truth is, he didn’t have a clue. He was completely honest about that. He didn’t lie to Persephone or to himself, he simply was blind to any wisdom that woman tried to give him.
There was only one person who really loved him in a romantic way. Completely lost and confused, Adam decided to pay him a visit.
Ronan was fixing a roof when Adam arrived at the sanctuary Ronan helped keep. He opened a smile when he saw Adam trying to catch his attention and went down to greet him.
“Hey, Parrish. Do you need something?”
Adam was a little embarrassed to have to ask this of him, but he didn’t have anyone else.
“Actually… I think I need some advice.”
Ronan laughed.
“If you’re going after
me
for advice, then everything really went to shit. What’s up?”
Adam felt himself blush, but he took a deep breath to stay focused and serious.
“So, remember when you were in love with me?”
Ronan raised one brow.
“Kinda hard to forget years of your life. Yeah, Parrish, of course I remember. What about it?”
“Do you think that could happen again? Not you specifically, but… do you think someone could love me again?”
Ronan was completely serious now, looking at him with concern.
“Adam, what the fuck? What kind of question is that?”
Feeling like a complete idiot, Adam began to back off.
“Yeah, that’s– that’s stupid, I don’t know what I was thinking, forget it–”
“Adam, no”, Ronan got closer again. “It’s not stupid. It’s just– it’s not a very healthy train of thought, that’s all. Why do you ask?”
Adam ended up telling about Persephone and her crystal ball, and it has to be said Ronan hid his amusement like a champ, although he found the whole thing admittedly stupid.
“Listen, I don’t really believe in all this psychic shit, but I know you do lie to yourself sometimes, especially about your feelings.”
“But I’m not lying!” Adam took a deep breath. “Listen. Just answer my question, okay? Only you can do it.”
Ronan thought for a moment before answering.
“I know you have some problems with self image, God knows that’s a trait we share, but… there were a lot of reasons that made me fall in love with you. I fell in love with your pride and hard work, with your sense of humor and your loyalty, with your protectiveness and your unconditional love for your friends, although you tried so hard to hide it. You were a fucked up little thing back then, being cruel when you shouldn’t with who didn’t deserve it, and even then I loved you. If you had someone willing to love you when you made it so hard for that to happen, I don’t think it’s impossible now, when you’re accepting affection and letting people in.”
Adam thought about all that in silence for a few seconds.
“Ronan?”
“Yeah?”
“Do you still love me?”
Ronan laughed softly.
“Not like that, no. But in another way, sure.”
“Good. Because I don’t love you like that, but in another way, sure.”
After that, Adam tried to pay more attention to what was around him, but it was hard when the only people around him were his coworkers, and all of them were either annoying or way too old, and Gansey. He loved spending time with Gansey, although he wouldn’t admit it out loud, and night after night he would create excuses to stay in instead of going out with any of their friends. The only ones he actually liked to be around often were Ronan and Noah, who made sure to visit whenever they could. One day, Adam was looking for something to watch on Netflix when Gansey came out of his room well dressed and obviously ready to go out.
“Where are you going?” Adam asked. Gansey seemed a little guilty before saying.
“Blue and I are going out for some drinks.”
Adam just stared at him, which made Gansey look even more guilty.
“It’s just some drinks! As friends! Nothing’s going to happen!”
The situation was ridiculous. Gansey, a single man, having to explain himself to his roommate, who was acting like a jealous girlfriend. He just sighed deeply and shook his head.
“Yeah, sure. Have fun.”
Gansey still seemed conflicted.
“I would never do anything to ruin this for us, Adam. And I doubt Blue would say anything if I told her – and I won’t, I promise – so this is just. A friendly night out.”
Adam looked at him.
“Just a friendly night out?”
“Absolutely.”
“With no second intentions?”
“None at all.”
“Then it’s no problem if I go with you guys, right?”
Adam saw the hesitation on Gansey’s face and that was enough to break his heart.
“Don’t worry, I won’t ruin your hookup.”
“Adam–”
“And if it goes wrong and she snitches on us, we can just go our separate ways. I find a place for me, you find a place for you. No resentments.”
Adam could see pain on Gansey’s face because of his words.
“Adam, what are you saying? I don’t want my own place, I want
this
.”
Adam was starting to doubt that.
“Go on your date, I’ll find something to do.”
After some hesitancy, Gansey left and Adam could finally let out all of the conflicted emotions that reigned on his head at the moment. He was well aware that he wasn’t this upset only because of the apartment. They could not find another place as good as this one, but they
could
find a place that suited their needs. No, that wasn’t the reason for his unhappiness. He just couldn’t pinpoint what it was, then.
He decided to go have a drink. Not knowing where to go, he went to the closest bar from his apartment and went to the counter, sitting on a stool and waiting for the bartender to notice him.
She was pretty, he thought to himself, with brown skin and long black hair in a braid, and she would stop to have a word with him anytime the place wasn’t busy. Adam kept drinking until she commented casually:
“You know, if you don’t stop drinking now, I will have to forbid anyone of taking you home.
Adam smiled at that.
“So I’m safe for now?”
“For now, yes.”
Adam stopped drinking, then, and at the end of her shift, the cute bartender took him to her home, where they spent the night together. He wasn’t a fan of hooking up with strangers, but he felt like that was the only way of calming down that strange feeling on his chest. It didn’t really work, he noticed with dismay.
When he arrived home the following morning, he found Blue asleep on their couch and a disturbed Gansey in the kitchen.
“Where were you?!”
“It doesn’t matter. What is she doing on our couch?”
“Actually it does matter!”
Adam sighed.
“I went to a bar, had a few drinks and went home with someone.
Why is she on our couch?
”
Gansey looked very disappointed.
“This someone must be really important for you to not even think about texting me saying you wouldn’t sleep home.”
“Actually no, she isn’t. She’s just someone I met in a bar.”
Gansey stayed silent for a few seconds after that.
“Then I must be worth shit to you, if you can’t reserve ten seconds of your night with a nobody to text me.”
Adam was tired and with a pounding headache, and honestly not in the mood to deal with Gansey like this.
“Gansey, I just forgot. I was tipsy, focusing on something else. You’re my best friend, of course I care about you.”
“Doesn’t seem like it.”
That was really getting on Adam’s nerves.
“You talk about caring, but you keep seeing someone who might potentially get ourselves kicked out of our
fucking perfect apartment
, and now she’s sleping on our couch for whatever the reason!”
“She got too drunk and didn’t want to hear a lecture from her mother, that’s all.”
“Bullshit, the last time I went to the shop they were drinking vodka. It was 9AM.”
“So what, are you telling me she lied to sleep here?”
“Yeah, that’s exactly what I’m saying.”
“You’re being completely unreasonable.”
“And you’re playing dumb so you can stay around her and not own up to the fact that you’re letting your dick control you!”
“You know, you should respect someone else’s sleep.”
Gansey and Adam turned to look at Blue, who had just arrived. Adam wasn’t even embarrassed of being caught talking shit about her, he was just frustrated and exhausted.
“Well, if you don’t want your sleep to be interrupted, you should go sleep in your own house.”
“Adam!”, Gansey reprimanded him and turned to Blue with a smile. “Ignore him, Adam is not a morning person.”
Blue laughed.
“No, it’s okay. It might be weird coming home to someone sleeping on your couch.”
“See?” Adam looked at Gansey. “She knows.”
Gansey rolled his eyes.
“Anyway, do you want some breakfast? We have a bunch of stuff here.”
“Nah, I’ll just catch some yogurt at home. Wouldn’t want to overstay my welcome.”
“Wise girl”, Adam said before Gansey had the chance to offer some of their yogurt. He made a face at Adam.
“See you guys around, and Gansey?”
“Yes?”
“We should repeat last night one of these days. I had a lot of fun.”
And with that, she left, Adam gaping at the place she was merely seconds before.
“The audacity.”
Gansey was clearly blushing at the situation.
“She was just being friendly.”
“Friendly my ass, Gansey”, and he left for his room before Gansey had the chance to reply.
Their relationship became strained after that. Both of them were feeling betrayed; Gansey for Adam sleeping out and not warning him about it, Adam because of Gansey and Blue's closer and closer relationship. Seeing the two together always left a weird taste in his mouth, and his heart ached in a way he just couldn't understand. He felt like he was losing Gansey, even though that was stupid; Gansey wasn't his to begin with.
Things got awkward when Jimi and Orla's apartment suffered an infiltration and they had to leave it for a couple of days. Maura went to inform them and ask for a favor.
“I know this is unorthodox and we don't want to impose, but since you guys have an extra bedroom, we came to ask if Blue could spend some days here with you while Jimi and Orla share her bedroom. She said you wouldn't mind, since you're friends.”
Adam was faster than Gansey.
“Actually, there's no reason for Blue to have to leave her bedroom. You can send Jimi or Orla to stay here with us, we wouldn't mind.”
Maura hesitated at that.
“Well, if you say so, then I'll talk to them. Thanks for cooperating.”
Gansey raised his eyebrows at him when Maura left.
“What was that?”
“What was what?”
Gansey looked at him, exasperated.
“You basically rejected Blue.”
“Did I? Huh. Didn't notice it.”
There was a tense silence between them.
“You don't really like Blue, do you?”
Adam shrugged.
“She's your friend, not mine. Anyway, will you mind sharing a bed for a few days, or were you planning on sharing it with Blue and this is why you were so upset?”
“Adam, don't be difficult, I was planning no such thing. And of course I won’t mind sharing a bed with you, we are friends.”
Adam wasn’t sure if that was true, but he suddenly felt immensely tired.
“Alright. I will take any stuff that makes it obvious that my room is actually
my
room and I’ll transfer it to yours. We’ll have guests very soon.”
And, in roughly two hours, Orla Sargent was in their apartment, bringing enough stuff with her that one would think she was moving permanently. Gansey and Adam shared a look, but refrained from saying anything.
Both of them had underestimated how observant Orla would be. Every time the two of them would talk, they could feel her eyes on them, as if she was waiting for something to happen. Adam’s paranoid mind would insist she already knew of their farce and was only waiting for one of them to drop the act. Because of that, at the first opportunity to talk to Gansey alone, he brought this little challenge.
“She keeps looking at us, have you noticed?” Gansey, who could seem oblivious at times but wasn’t stupid, nodded.
“Do you think she’s suspicious of us?”
“Maybe. I think we should be more affectionate with each other, like a real couple.”
Gansey raised a brow.
“Do you think you can do it?”
Adam rolled his eyes.
“I’m the bisexual one here, Gansey. Do you think
you
can do it?”
“It won’t be a problem for me.”
And then the two of them became the happiest, loveliest couple in front of Orla. Everytime she was around, Gansey would put an arm around Adam’s waist or Adam would take advantage of his superior height to kiss his temple. They would hold hands and sit on each other’s laps and do every couple-y thing in the book, which made the whole situation so complicated since they still haven’t solved their issues with each other. They would lay awake at night side by side on Gansey’s bed, looking at the ceiling and pretending they were asleep. It was torturing, but Adam was never good at solving this type of problem.
There was also Orla’s personality in general, which could be… overwhelming to say the least. She was a beautiful woman who liked to show that, and neither Gansey nor Adam knew how to tell her that they would rather she stopped walking around in shorts and a bra. The three days she spent in their apartment seemed much longer than they actually were and, although she was nice in general, it was a relief when she left.
Adam went after Ronan again after all the chaos Orla’s stay caused. He ended up helping him fix some stuff around the sanctuary, and Ronan listened patiently while he told him his never ending list of problems.
“And things are really weird now, because Gansey is always with Blue and I just know he will fall for her charms and put our perfect apartment in jeopardy, which obviously makes me mad, and he’s also mad at me because I slept out and didn’t warn him, and then there was Orla in our house for three days and we had to pretend we were this perfect, happy couple and share a bed and now we can barely look in each other’s faces.”
Ronan stayed quiet for a long time, long enough for Adam to stop his work and look at him. His friend had the most flabbergasted look on his face Adam’s ever seen, which made him worried he said the wrong thing.
“What?”
“God, Adam. The two of you are fucking idiots.”
He was definitely not expecting that.
“What do you mean?”
Ronan was about to say something when he interrupted himself and shook his head.
“Uh, nope. No way. I’m not gonna be the one to break it to you, because it’s so stupid and both of you are way too smart to need someone to spell it out for you. No, you’ll have to get over your pride and your stupidity and see the glaring, obvious thing that’s right in front of your eyes.”
“Ronan!”
“I’m not your mommy, Parrish. Get your shit together.”
Well, that wasn’t helpful at all.
When he went back to his apartment, Blue was in front of his locked door.
“Gansey’s working, he’ll be back around 5.”
“I know”, she replied. “I was actually wanting to talk to you.”
Here we go
, he thought, leaning against his door.
“Alright. What do you need?”
“Orla told me you guys were really kind to her while she stayed with you, and I wanted to say thanks.”
“You could have said thanks to Gansey.”
“Well, you were the one who lent her your bedroom.”
Adam froze. She must have gone through his closet.
“She slept in the guests’ room.”
“You keep your clothes in the guests’ room?”
“Yeah, Gansey has too much stuff and he needs the entire space in our room’s closet, so I have to use the other room’s.”
Blue raised a brow.
“I don’t know if I believe that.”
“Well, I’ll definitely won’t lose my sleep at night over what you believe or don’t. Have a nice day.”
He was unlocking the door when she spoke again.
“I can tell my mothers. You will be kicked out for lying.”
“And then I’ll hire a lawyer to sue your mommies’ asses for breach of contract and I’ll end up as the owner of this place until the end of the year. Don’t worry, they can still work downstairs, but they’ll have to pay rent, of course.”
“You think you’re so tough, don’t you? I know you’re scared.”
Adam stopped what he was doing and turned to her, getting close enough she had to look up to keep looking at him. To her credit, she didn’t back down.
“Listen here, Sargent, I’m gonna be straight with you. While you grew up in Rainbow Town with your three mothers and ugly clothes, I was crawling from fucking hell to be where I am right now. You have no idea of the things I’ve seen, done and had done to me. You’re just a spoiled girl desperate for male’s attention and while I’m sure you think you’re so tough and such a big girl, you’re the typical average, mediocre citizen trying desperately to be special. You’re not. The most interesting thing about you is your family, and they would still be interesting without you. So I’m sure you can think you can scare me, but truth is, if you end up somehow managing to kick me out for whatever the reason you make up, Gansey is coming with me. You might be satisfying the curiosity for poor people he naturally has, but that’s not enough for him to leave me. Now can you back the fuck off? I’m trying to enter my home here.”
He was dissing at her, but he was also testing her. Seeing which of his insults would actually hit home, which ones wouldn’t even scratch. Now he had some data to analyze in his free time over the ways to hurt her.
Because yes, he was scared. But he’d be damned if he wouldn’t do anything to keep Gansey from leaving him for her.
The next time she appeared was during one of Ronan and Noah’s visits. Gansey ended up inviting her inside and Adam was admittedly curious over his friends’ opinion about her.
Ronan was not impressed, but Noah seemed fascinated by her. He sat by her side and started to show her his art on his phone. She seemed excited by Noah’s personality and pretty much ignored the rest of the room in his favor.
If Ronan wasn’t impressed before, now he wasn’t amused. Ronan was always possessive by nature, and Adam could remember how he would blow up over anyone trying to flirt with him. Gansey also seemed confused, and Adam couldn’t avoid feeling a little smug about the whole thing.
To be fair, he didn’t think Noah and Blue were flirting, they just seemed to hit it off because of their similar personalities, but Ronan would, from now on, side with him on everything Blue related, and Gansey would start to question himself over the validity of Blue’s attention on him.
Ronan, Noah and Blue left, and Adam couldn’t stop himself from saying casually:
“Noah and Blue got along really well, don’t you think?”
“I suppose.”
“They even traded phone numbers.”
“Mhm.”
“I guess they’re gonna have a lot to talk about, like his art and whatever she does on her clothes.”
“I think so.”
“They are really compatible, like, wow. Ronan even got jealous.”
“I think I’m gonna go read a little bit.”
“Sure, love, I’ll work a bit too.”
He didn’t notice what he said until he said it, and he was about to bolt to his room when Gansey stopped him.
“What did you just call me?”
“...bro.”
“You didn’t call me bro.”
“I did.”
“You called me love.”
“You misheard.”
“No, I didn’t”, he started to laugh. “Oh god, you called me love.”
“I didn’t mean to! It was all those days with Orla here.”
“That was weeks ago.”
“It’s like– it’s like when you call your teacher ‘mom’ on accident.”
“I’ve never done that.”
“Oh god, can you leave me alone?”
Gansey laughed some more and, out of nowhere, left a kiss on his cheek.
“I’m gonna read my book,
love.
”
And he left for his room, leaving a mortified Adam behind.
He had no idea why he called Gansey “love”. He remembered when he was with Ronan, as in love as an 18 year old could be, and pet names weren’t really on the table. Ronan was very affectionate and adoring, but not with words, and Adam always had trouble expressing his feelings verbally, so why would he call his friend a pet name so spontaneously?
Time passed and Noah and Blue’s friendship only strengthened. One day, while the five of them ate burgers at a local diner, Ronan had to sit on Adam’s side, since Blue stole his place near Noah. Ronan got closed to Adam and whispered on his good ear while no one else paid attention:
“You could make it look like an accident, right? I know you could make it look like an accident.”
Adam laughed.
“You didn’t help me, I won’t help you. Have fun with your boyfriend’s new bestie.”
Ronan didn’t seem to find it funny, but Adam was having the time of his life. Gansey, who seemed to find peace in not being Blue’s favorite anymore, decided to turn his attention to his friends.
“What are you guys whispering about?”
“It’s nothing”, Adam replied, which seemed to sour Gansey’s mood.
“Do you guys have inside jokes without me now?”
“We always had inside jokes without you”, Ronan answered. Gansey didn’t seem to like his answer and Adam was feeling generous towards him, so he said:
“Ronan is just saying I could kill someone and make it look like an accident if I wanted to.”
“...well, that’s dark.”
“Am I wrong?”, Ronan asked. At this point, Noah and Blue’s attention was also on them. “Adam is like, the smartest person I’ve ever met and I know you guys agree. He can also be a cold blooded asshole, if he wants to. I don’t think he would do it for no reason, but like, if someone was threatening Gansey, for example? He would do it for sure.”
“I don’t know if he would kill someone”, Noah inserted himself in the conversation. “I think he could… I don’t know, frame someone for murder and get rid of the person like this.”
“Adam wouldn’t do this”, Gansey disagreed.
“Well, to protect my friends? I don’t know, maybe. Although I have to agree with Noah, framing someone for murder sounds like in my alley.”
“I don’t know”, Blue finally said. “I think he’s more bark than bite.”
“Everyone says that”, Ronan replied. “That is, until he bites.”
It wasn't until they got home that Adam was able to really talk to Gansey.
“You seem more okay about Blue's attention on Noah than before.”
“Oh”, Gansey looked at him. “I was always okay with their friendship.”
Adam snorted.
“Gansey. You looked like Noah had taken a lollipop out of your mouth. Cut the crap.”
His best friend stayed silent for a moment.
“Well, I guess I was a little upset, yes.”
“And what changed?”
“Priorities, I guess? I also may have misinterpreted my feelings about Blue. She's a good friend, but that's it.”
Adam shouldn't be feeling só happy about this information.
“And I guess I owe you an apology for almost putting us on the streets over a girl.”
“Well, I also owe you an apology for worrying you that night.”
“So we're even?”
Adam smiled.
“We're even.”
“I still can't believe you would cheat on me and ruin our fake engagement, though”, Adam joked, relieved they were finally okay. Gansey looked at him in a way that he could not decipher.
“Adam, if you were actually mine, I would never cheat on you. That I can guarantee you.”
Adam gaped at him, not knowing how to respond. Gansey seemed to realize the tone of what he said and blushed profusely.
“I just mean I– I'm not like this when I'm dating, I'm very loyal, so if we were dating, let's say, hypothetically, I wouldn't cheat on you. Because I'm not like that.”
“No, I got it”, Adam reassured him. “I understood what you meant.”
“Good, good”, Gansey looked relieved.
As the days passed, the feeling in Adam's gut that something was about to happen between him and Gansey grew exponentially. They were spending more and more time together and their interactions were more intimate and affectionate. Ronan and Noah were amused by the whole thing while Blue would just looked pensive. After their argument, they formed an unspoken agreement of pretending to tolerate each other for their friends’ sake, and that was probably the reason why she refrained from commenting on their behavior.
Adam and Ronan were buying fruit for the animals when Ronan started talking.
“I commented to Gansey about the open relationship thing.”
Ronan told him before that Noah and him had talked about opening the relationship for a whole two minutes before shutting the idea down completely.
“Really? What was his opinion about it?”
“He just asked me if I thought about it because I wanted to be able to be with you and keep Noah.”
Adam stopped in his tracks.
“Oh, wow.”
“Yeah. I told him literally, like,
what the fuck, dude
, and he answered that we've been spending too much time together.”
“That sounds like jealousy”, Adam commented. “...do you think he has feelings for you?”
That didn't seem like the right thing to say.
“Oh, for fuck's sake, Parrish, will I have to shake you until your brain starts to function again? Did they eat all of your intelligence in Harvard?”
“Now you're just offending me–”
“Adam.” Ronan turned and held him by the shoulders while looking at him. “It's right in front of your face. Really, it's so glaringly obvious that there's no explanation other than that you're being purposefully dense in order to deny your feelings. Will I really have to spell it out for you?”
Adam probably looked hilarious, looking at Ronan wide-eyed and baffled.
“Please tell me you know what I'm talking about.”
Adam thought about it for a second.
“...not really, no.”
“Okay, that's it. Leave.”
“What?!”
“I can't look at you right now, just leave.”
When Adam noticed Ronan was being serious, he went back home, still confused by the whole interaction and, as if that wasn't enough, Adam went home for a scene he definitely didn't want to see.
Gansey and Blue were sitting on the couch together looking at something on Gansey's tablet. They were in close proximity, their heads almost touching and Blue's hand on Gansey's arm. Their body language screamed intimacy and Adam felt like he could be sick at any moment.
They only realized Adam arrived when he passed through them on his way to the kitchen, so absorbed they were on each other. Gansey got up and followed him.
“Hey! You came back earlier from Ronan's today–”
“Don't worry, I'm leaving again already, god forbid I interrupt yours and Blue's alone time.”
Gransey frowned.
“Adam, that couldn't be further than the truth.”
“Really? Because that's what it seemed on the couch, the two of you that close while she touched your arm–”
“Careful, Parrish, someone might think you're jealous–”
“Maybe I am! Maybe I'm fucking jealous of this arrogant, nosy, annoying-ass miniature!”
Gansey looked at him for long seconds in total silence until he left the kitchen without telling Adam what he was doing. Embarrassed by his outburst, Adam waited for Gansey to come back to ask:
“Why did you leave?”
“I was sending Blue home. We need to talk.”
Adam nodded, still processing the whole thing. The two of them sat on the chairs in the kitchen and Gansey began to talk.
“Adam, listen. Listening to you saying that makes me elated, you probably know that, but… I don't know. I'm tired of this hot and cold thing between us. You need to tell me how you feel.”
The words leaving Gansey's mouth were running around Adam's brain and leaving him confused. It took a few instants for him to understand the meaning of what he was saying.
“...wait. You like me?”
Gansey seemed perplexed at the question.
“Yes, for years now. I thought it was obvious.”
“Not to me.”
“...I'm not gonna lie, I thought you were stringing me along.”
“I wasn't, I'm just stupid.”
Gansey laughed.
“You're way too smart for your own good, you're just oblivious.”
“Okay… what do we do now?”
“Whatever you want to do.”
Adam wanted a lot of things, so he went for the safest.
“I think I need some time to think. It's just– I never thought something like this would be possible. I don't know what to do about it.”
Gansey smiled.
“Fine by me.”
“There's just one condition.”
“I'm all ears.”
“No Blue, or anyone else, for that matter, until we have an answer. For both of us.”
Gansey chuckled at that.
“It's only you already, Adam. You don't need to worry about it.”
Two weeks passed and, although they were strictly friends until Adam made his decision, the atmosphere was different somehow. There would be glances and shy smiles and even stolen kisses on the cheek and forehead. Everything was so natural that refraining themselves from doing it seemed absurd.
Adam made his decision on a Sunday afternoon. The two of them were watching a random movie on TV and Gansey had a hand on his thigh, one of his fingers tracing figures on Adam’s skin. Gansey’s hand was warm and soft, a hand that was never exposed to manual labor, and his touch was so delicate that it seemed like the product of a dream. He kept looking at Gansey’s hand and at his face, his side profile showcasing his finest features.
He couldn’t escape his destiny, Adam thought to himself.
“Gansey?”
“Yeah?”, he asked almost absently while he took his eyes from the TV screen to look at Adam, and only then he noticed the weight of the other boy’s stare. “ …Adam?”
“I made my decision.”
Gansey raised his brows, clearly not expecting to hear about that at that moment.
“Oh, right, of course.” He turned to Adam’s direction so he could look at him straight in the face. “So, what’s your decision?”
Adam got closer to him and, with all the softness he could muster, he touched Gansey’s lips with his.
He could feel Gansey sigh against his lips and that was incentive enough to press them a little harder while his hands went to Gansey’s hair. The other boy seemed to be pleased at Adam’s touches, because next thing he knows, Gansey was holding on to the fabric of his shirt and bringing him closer while they kissed.
They stayed like that for hours, to the point where Gansey ended up on Adam's lap and both of their shirts were in a small pile on the floor. Gansey found out Adam had a very sensitive neck and made good use of this info, while Adam noticed Gansey would shiver in delight when Adam called him “baby”.
“You’re forbidden from leaving my lap”, Adam stated, full of goosebumps while Gansey lazily kissed on his neck, giving small bites on the skin. He could feel Gansey laughter.
“I don’t know if I’ll be able to work on your lap.”
“You'll figure it out.”
Soon their touches became more heated and they had to move to Gansey's room, where they found out their bodies fit in the most wonderful ways. Never before in his life Adam heard his name be said so softly, so lovely. He would cover Gansey in kisses, from his cheeks to his neck and chest to even lower. He had his fair share of lovers, but none of them tasted this sweet or looked at him with such awe. It was almost overwhelming in the best possible way.
Once they were finished, tired and intertwined, Adam mumbled against Gansey's hair.
“You'll end things with Blue, right?”
Gansey rolled his eyes.
“There's nothing to end, Adam.”
“So you never felt anything for her?”
There were a couple seconds of silence before Adam had an answer.
“There was curiosity at first and… well, I guess attraction too. I liked you for so long and we didn't really seem to be going anywhere, so I thought maybe she could help me move on, but… there were never feelings. Once I understood that the rebound situation wouldn't work, I just… stopped trying. Now we're just friends, I promise you.”
“Does she know that?”
“I was very clear about it with her, don't worry. She didn't seem to be disappointed, to be fair.”
Adam snorted and kissed Gansey's forehead.
“I wouldn’t lose any sleep at night if she was, but good for her.”
A lot of things changed after that night, but in a way, a lot remained the same. Gansey's room was now Gansey and Adam's room, and they were always touching somehow when they're out with their friends, much to Ronan and Noah's amusement. However, they would still argue about petty things sometimes and have disagreements caused by their drastically different upbringings. They were boyfriends now, but they were still best friends.
They were leaving their apartment when the biggest surprise happened. They were play fighting on the doorway over some random thing, and Adam pinned Gansey against the wall and saw his boyfriend's eyes darken in desire. Unable to resist, he gave him a long, deep kiss that was only interrupted by Calla's voice.
“Oh, so you're together now. Took you both some time.”
Adam looked at her, alarmed.
“Uh, what do you mean?”
She raised a brow.
“Do you really think you can lie to three psychics? Give me a break. But congratulations, or whatever.”
And she entered her apartment, leaving the two men gaping after her.
That was really a weird place.