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“Buckles, buckles everywhere.” Michelangelo sang the words as he performed a short dance shuffle next to the infirmary’s exam table. “Can it, Mikey. You ain’t helping,” Raphael snapped. Watching as Donatello carefully loosened a buckle and removed the first of Raph’s right thigh straps, Mikey said, “Why is it the guy with the least number of buckles is the one playing doctor?” Without looking up, Don replied, “Because my bō keeps the Foot goons away from me.” Raph’s eyes narrowed, not from aggravation, but as a tiny giveaway that he was experiencing pain. It was a tell, one he wasn’t aware of, and Don was not going to call attention to it. If he did, he’d never have any outward signs that Raph was hurting. Blood coated Raph’s leg, starting at the gash running lengthwise across the top of his thigh. Very carefully, Don worked to undo the buckle on the top thigh strap. The blade that had sliced into Raph’s skin had also nicked the leather on the strap enough so that it would have to be replaced. “What I’m saying is, if Raph and Leo are going to keep getting cut up, they should wear armor on their legs instead of straps,” Mikey said. “Why do those guys always aim for the legs?” Leaning back in a chair in a corner of the room with his leg propped up on a battered old ottoman, Leonardo snorted his derision. “It’s because they’re no good. Shredder recruits for volume, not skill.” Having finally worked the last strap off of Raph’s leg, Don pressed a clean cloth against the wound and applied pressure. Even though he’d taken his time and been gentle, removing that strap had caused a fresh flow of blood. He looked up at his youngest brother. “Come here and hold this while I clean my needle and grab more suture thread.” Mikey did as he was told, making a quick exchange with Don so the latter could drop a couple of needles in the water that was boiling on the portable single burner camp stove. He walked over to the supply cabinet which was near where Leo sat. As Don pulled a box of thread off a shelf, he looked down at his brother. With a nod, Don indicated Leo’s own leg wound. “For guys who aren’t any good, they certainly managed to inflict some serious injuries. Another inch and he’d have hit your femoral artery.” “Maybe Leo should stop jumping down at them with his legs spread,” Mikey said. “Ow!” He shook Raph’s fingers off his upper arm without letting up on the pressure he was applying to his brother’s wound. The pinch wasn’t as bad as Leo’s low growl. Lecture time. “I had to look for you,” Leo scolded. “You were not in position. That is not the kind of distraction we need in a fight.” “Not my fault,” Mikey said. Don approached, holding his newly sterilized equipment, and shooed Mikey back with a wave of his fingers. Mikey turned towards Leo. “There were a couple of kids next to the warehouse. I had to steer them out of there.” The corners of Leo’s mouth tightened. “If you’re going off book then it’s up to you to communicate your intentions. This is why we train as a team.” Mikey rolled his eyes. “Then we need to come up with some kind of code word for ‘I’m rescuing civilians’ so I don’t actually have to telegraph to the Foot what it is I’m doing.” “He’s got an answer for everything,” Raph said, his voice a little tight. Don was busy stitching up his leg. “Save your breath, Leo.” “Go ahead and get it out of your systems now,” Don said, maintaining his focus on the job at hand. “Once I’m done here, my dear injured brothers, I expect both of you to take it easy. I would suggest bed rest.” An impudent grin stretched across Raph’s mouth. He rolled his head to the side and tilted it back so he could see Leo. “I ain’t going to bed alone.” Leo’s expression softened slightly. “We can share.” At the sink washing his hands, Mikey immediately started chuckling. “Hey, Don, you ever noticed how a shot of adrenalin makes them both horny?” “That or pain,” Don said, amusement replacing the look of concentration. “Maybe both. I might do a study on that.” “I’m not gonna be your guinea pig,” Raph protested. “Bad enough I’m your pincushion.” “Then stop getting hurt,” Don retorted, cutting the suture thread. “There, all done. Do you want help getting to your room?” The question was merely a courtesy because he already knew the answer. Sitting up, Raph shot him a disdainful look. “The only time I’ll need help walking is when I’m out cold.” “That makes zero sense,” Mikey said, moving aside so that Don could wash his hands. Raph hopped down from the table and shuffled over to where Leo sat. Holding out a hand, he grabbed Leo’s offered one and pulled the older Turtle out of the chair. For a moment, the two just stood there, face to face, staring at each other. Seeing their expressions, Don called out, “You are meant to be resting when you go to bed.” “We’ll go to my room then. It’s closer,” Leo said, without taking his eyes off Raph. “His bed’s on the ground, so we don’t have to do any climbing.” Raph glanced back at Don. “That good enough?” Don sighed, knowing his point was not getting across and that he shouldn’t waste further breath trying. “Just don’t break your stitches.” “Oh, oh, I know,” Mikey said as he hopped up and down. “Doggy style. That way Leo can spread his legs while Raph goes in behind and . . . .” Don’s bō came down on the top of his head, stopping the flow of words. Mikey shot him a sour look, which phased Don not at all. “You really have no braking system for your mouth, do you?” Mikey smiled, trying and failing to look innocent. “Under certain circumstances, you like when I use my mouth.” Braced against each other, Raph and Leo started for the door. Looking back over his shoulder, Leo said, “Don’t worry about us, Don. We’ll take care of each other.” When they were out of the room, Mikey turned back to Don. “Just imagine all the fun they’ll have undressing each other. Unbuckling the other leg straps, the knee pads, the elbow pads . . . .” Don shook his head. “What is it with you and innuendo tonight?” “When I don’t innuendo, you hit me on the head,” Mikey replied. He sauntered up to Don and began toying with the buckle on his chest strap. “What are you doing?” Don asked, a slight hitch in his voice giving away the fact that he knew exactly what Mikey was doing. “And why are you so obsessed with buckles?” “Well, first” Mikey said, giving his brother a wink, “I figured you’d want some data on the adrenaline equals horny question. And second, why should Raph and Leo be the only ones having fun with buckles?”