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Bustling laughter filled the bar of the inn as the thieves went on about their adventures and big hits on the city. Sigrid was particularly proud of her recent job in which she had stolen a golden vase worth almost four thousand coins. Olaf, the barkeep and owner of the inn, made sure to keep plenty of mead and ale considering the thieves were quite the heavy drinkers, especially on nights after a big score. Rune, known as the impulsive one, slammed his tankard down, spilling some ale on the round table. His face was flushed red from how many drinks he’d had.
“I’ll do you lads one better!” He began, “I bet that I could steal from Emperor Aulus himself”
Bjørn scoffed before taking a sip from his tankard, “Rune, you’re a sneaky man, but you’re not that sneaky. You’ll get caught by the royal guard before you even slip through the door”
A sly grin snuck onto his lips, “All right then! How about this? I’ll bet you a hundred gold that I can get at least three valuables from the emperor's quarters without getting caught once!”
Everyone around the table looked at the two in amusement, mostly at Rune. Not only because he was very intoxicated but because it seemed like an utterly ridiculous idea that would surely get him caught.
“Then it’s a deal. Just make sure you don’t die. I would like that one hundred gold when you lose the bet,” Bjørn said.
Rune was about to head out the door when Olaf grabbed his shoulder.
“Oh no you don’t!” He said, “You’re sleeping off that ale, lad”
The next night after sobering up, he was just now processing the magnitude of his “plan” Wait, how am I supposed to do this exactly? I really need to stop making bets while drunk. But he knew he needed to form some sort of plan. Not unless he wanted to face embarrassment that is. So, he climbed over the palace fence and sat in a nearby bush to scope out the place. As he watched the scarce activity, something, or rather someone, caught his eye. It was one of the knights entering through the gate. Rune looked for something around him to use. There was a branch resting at his feet. It was thick and sturdy enough for the job. Perfect. He took it and snuck up to the knight who was completely unaware of his presence.
“Hey, what do you call a wand that isn’t magical?” Rune asked.
The guard perked up, “Huh?”
“A stick!” He said before bashing the knight in his helmet before he could turn around.
There was a hollow ringing sound from the hit before the knight crumpled to the ground with a groan. Rune took the knight’s armour, put it on, and dragged the man to the bush. Then it was off to the palace doors. When he walked down the stretch of the pathway and got to the doors, the guard at them, also in the same armour, stopped him.
“Hey,” The guard said, “What’s with the dent in your helmet?”
Rune panicked a little at the sudden stop but luckily, it wasn’t visible on account of the helmet on his head. He had to make up something—and quick.
Rune let out a hearty laugh, “Don’t even get me started, lad! A filthy peasant hit me with a stick because he didn’t want to pay his taxes!”
There was a long silence between them that made Rune very uncomfortable. Then, suddenly, he heard the echo of laughter coming from the guard’s helmet. The guard gave him a loud metal clap on the back and let him in. He let out a sigh of relief and continued down the palace corridor. It was beautiful inside and the idea of the riches he’d get from just a single room alone made his mouth water. However, he probably wasn’t going to be very good at sneaking with the metal armour on. Sure, knight armour had plenty of mobility. You could run in it, get on horseback with no trouble, and even do a roll if you wanted to, but it was still metal and made noise. This wouldn't be a problem if this were an engaged battle, but this was a relatively quiet palace. He needed to find some clothes so he could sneak around easier. It would also allow him more freedom because knights had restricted access to certain parts of the palace. Now where would I find some clothes? He wondered. It was at that moment that he saw one of the servants walking down the corridor with a tray. He was heading for one of the kitchens. Rune ran to him and blocked his path.
The servant looked at him in confusion, “Is there trouble, sir?”
He grabbed the silver tray from his hand and set it on a nearby end table of ivory. The servant now appeared nervous.
“Oh, there’s no problem. Well, except for this,” He said, pointing to his fist.
The servant shrugged, “I don’t see anything wrong with it-”
He hit him on the top of the head with his fist and the man fell to the floor. He quickly found a room with a closet and dragged the man there. He took the servant's uniform and decided to set the knight's armour in a corner. When he left the room, he grabbed the platter and walked down the corridor and up the stairs. He was now on the first upper floor and while turning a corner, he nearly bumped into a woman.
She beamed at him, “Ah yes! A servant. I need one of you in the master bedroom to fetch me my nightgown while I bathe,”
She definitely looked familiar. That’s when he noticed her intricate dress and heavy makeup, along with the dotted beauty mark on her cheek. It was Empress Nora!
“Uhh, yes, Madam!” He said with a bow, trying to lean into the servant role.
Really though, all he wanted was one or more of her prized necklaces and fine jewelry. He’d heard about a sapphire jewelled necklace adorned with pearls that the Emperor had purchased her from France. He had even gotten a painter to make a portrait of her wearing it. If he could get even just the necklace alone, that would likely be over twenty thousand gold, which was certainly enough to keep the group going for a good while. So he followed her to the master bedroom and when she left for the washroom, he immediately went to one of the dressers and started searching in the jewellery box. He found a pearl hair ornament with some jewels on it but no sapphire necklace. Of course, he did take the hair ornament since it still had plenty of value. As he looked around some more, he took multiple gold and silver rings as well as a few pearl necklaces and one ruby necklace. He’d already technically completed the bet, but he wanted to go above and beyond. He wanted this to be a big score. The kind of score to warrant a celebration of too much food and a bad combination with an overabundance of alcohol. As he thought about this, he heard the empress in the washroom.
“Servant!” She yelled, “May you bring me a block of soap?”
Rune looked around hurriedly for a block of soap until he saw a platter with a white bar on it.
“Wow, it was right there? I need spectacles," He mumbled, grabbing it.
When he was in the washroom, he covered his eyes and stumbled over to the tub. He was a thief, but he was certainly not a pervert! His mother raised him well…sort of. When the Empress took the lard bar, he stumbled out of the room. However, since his eyes were covered he wasn’t aware of when he’d left the washroom. So as a result he bumped into a nearby painting. Rune quickly uncovered his eyes to see if something was about to fall but was met with something quite peculiar. The painting swung from side to side with each swing revealing a suspicious wooden panel. He moved the painting to the side and opened the panel, revealing a little wooden box. With a flip of the latch, the box opened, revealing a stunning necklace. It looked just like how Rune had heard it described. A necklace with four rows full of pearls with a large sapphire gem in the middle. He took it and stored it in his pocket, then closed the box and put the painting back in place. He suddenly remembered that he was technically playing a servant role and went to a separate room connected to the master bedroom to find a nightgown for the empress. And there it was! A white nightgown with a floral pattern. That must be it! He thought. He grabbed it and something else caught his eye. Emperor Aulus’ sceptre and crown! He grabbed the staff, set the crown upon his head and went to the edge of the washroom. After placing the gown over the wooden privacy divider, he went to the window to sneak out with the sceptre. There was a small issue, however. When he opened the window and looked down, it was pretty high up. Suddenly, his hand touched something that pricked his finger. He flinched back and flapped his hand back and forth in pain. When he looked at his finger, he saw a splinter. With a wince, he picked the splinter from his finger and looked further down to realize that a trellis covered in vines was on the window. Something he could use to climb down! Although it didn’t really look like it could hold an adult man, he knew he couldn’t just leave with the valuables in plain sight. So he climbed. As he climbed down the trellis he could feel it giving to his weight. He made it halfway down and was about fifteen feet high when he heard a loud crack.
“Uh oh.” He peeped.
The trellis broke and he fell on his back into the grass. He was covered in vines and a nearby gardener looked at him in confusion. He couldn’t make out Rune’s face considering the vines obscuring his features. Rune ran quickly in a panic and threw a clump of dirt at the gardener so hard the man fell. When he ran to the fence and was climbing it, he heard the man yelling curses at him. He ran all two miles back to the inn. While running, he slipped through alleys to escape public view. He busted through the door, nearly slamming into Olaf who was carrying tankards to be cleaned.
“Woah, lad!” He yelled, “So, I’m assuming you were successful?”
Rune nodded and ran up to the inn bunks. A devilish smile spread across his lips and he kicked Bjørn’s bed frame over and over again until he woke up.
“Ugh!” Bjørn groaned, “What!”
His anger dissipated almost immediately when he saw Rune and his…interesting fashion choice. He looked like if a vine monster were royalty.
Rune laughed and pointed at him, “Ha! I told you I could do it! I stole so many things! We’re gonna be rich!”
Everyone shifted in their bunks in annoyance until they saw what he was holding. Everyone got up in excitement and looked at the haul.
“Empress Nora’s sapphire necklace!” Sigrid exclaimed, “This has to be at least thirty thousand gold alone!”
Everyone in the group knew they’d be set for a long while, if not for life.
Bjørn smiled, “Well, Rune, you proved me wrong. This calls for a celebration!”
And so that they did. They sold all the valuables Rune had stolen and with their newfound riches, got a ship so they could travel the seas in search of new places to steal from. The end. Or is it?