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Why Did the Vampire Cross the Road

Chapter 1
Seras sat in an overstuffed chair, staring into the middle distance while feeding Nicole. It had been six hours since Harry's disappearance and she had exhausted herself screaming and crying. Zorin and Rip were holding each other on a nearby couch weeping quietly, and Integra was on her phone discussing Minerva about what had happened.“I've even recruited some of the older students to assist in researching what little we have about demonology and multiverse theory. If there's an answer at Hogwarts we will find it, I promise you.” Minerva said. Integra nodded, too choked up to answer verbally.“Integra I promise you, if he said he'll be back you know he will.” Minerva said.“Thank you, Minerva. Please contact me if you find anything.” Integra said after taking a moment to compose herself.“I will. Remember, Alucard, Sirius, Remus and Tonks are all tearing through the black Library as well. They're likely to be the first to find anything useful.” Minerva said.“Understood.” Integra said, closing her phone. She slumped back in her chair, her face twisted in despair as her mind was scrambling to think of something. She looked over at Seras and the fog and panic evaporated. Comforting Seras was something she could do. She stood and made her way over.“Seras, look at me.” Integra said. She slowly raised her gaze up to meet Integra's.“We will find him. We will bring him back. That toad summoned a demon before, and then opened a portal to send him there, which means it can be done and it goes both ways. We simply need to find it. For all we know he's looking for a way back himself.” Integra said. Seras' lip trembled, and she let out a sob.“M-my Harry....” Seras said. Integra was about to retrieve a blood replenisher and offer to feed Seras when the building shook and alarms started going off. Integra ran over to her desk and pressed the button on her intercom system.“Report!” Integra said.“Vampires and Wizards, ze wards are holding for now, I've already called Alucard he is on his way.” Pip said.“Understood. Keep me posted.” Integra said. Focus and determination flooded her, banishing the sorrow and uncertainty she'd been drowning in previously. She looked up at everyone else in the room.“Rip, your job is now to protect Zorin and the babies. Make your way to Harry's manor and stay put.” Integra said.“Y-yes.” Rip said, pulling Zorin to her feet.“Seras, is Nicole all set?” Integra asked. Seras looked down and saw that Nicole had fallen asleep.”“She should be fine for a few hours.” Seras said, fixing her shirt. She stood and handed Nicole to Zorin“Go to the Manor. Harry has hundreds of gallons of blood stored in stasis, you know where. If Nicole wakes up, make her a bottle of formula and add a dropper of Harry's blood to it.” Seras said.“I will. Please, be careful.” Zorin begged, stepping forward and embracing Seras. Zorin joined as well, dragging Integra into the hug. Zorin and Rip left and walked towards the Portal room while Seras and Integra made their way to the front entrance and stepped outside, just in time to see a bright flash and feel the reverberation of explosions going off in mid-air. Several tanks were taking potshots at the manor, but the wards were shielding them.“Seras, would you please be a dear and annihilate those nazi fucks for me?” Integra growled.“With pleasure.” Seras said before throwing herself at the tank column so fast she appeared to have been flying.“Fire!” a tank commander shouted. Before he could pull the trigger, Seras had bent the main gun's barrel up 90 degrees, causing the upper half of the tank to explode.“Schieße!” The gunner yelled as he pulled his broken body out from under the wreckage. He clawed his way to what he presumed was safety from the rapidly spreading fire when he looked up and saw red eyes glaring at him. Seras growled and grabbed him by his neck and dragged him over to another tank that had lined its sights up to fire on the manor.“What are you.. No! No!!!! NO!!!!” The nazi screamed as she hefted him up and held him in front of the gun just as it fired. The nazi exploded into a fine pink mist, along with half of the gun barrel and half of Seras' body, which almost immediately reconstituted itself. Integra retrieved her phone and called Amelia.“Amelia, Hellsing Manor is under attack from Millennium. Prepare to evacuate your people to Hogwarts, I assume this is a coordinated attack.” Integra said.“They're already making their move, Diagon is mostly evacuated and the Aurors are holding their own. Are you and yours safe?” Amelia asked.“Rip and Zorin are in Potter Manor with the girls, Seras is currently expressing our displeasure with Millennium against their tanks.” Integra said.“I'll pretend I know what a tank is. Be safe and stay in touch.” Amelia said.“You too.” Integra said, closing the phone before reopening it again.“Your majesty... Millennium is making their move. I'd recommend evacuating to Balmoral.” Integra said.“I know, I just got off the phone with Prime Minister Blair, he's sending the RAF and a company of marines to you.” Elizabeth said.“Please, take Phillip and go.” Integra said. She winced at the sound of metal ripping followed by another explosion and Seras' guttural roar.“We're already preparing. Godspeed, Integra.” The queen said, closing the connection.“We came as soon as we could. Harry's Elves along with Zorin and Rip are with the orphans.” Anderson said, walking out of the manor flanked by Heinkel and Yumiko who had foregone her habit and was wearing Harry's armor over a compression suit.“Infantry incoming in on the south lawn!” Pip screamed over his megaphone.“IF you don't mind?” Integra asked.“Aye, I'm on it.” Anderson said, leading Yumie towards the south lawn.“Not joining them, Heinkel?” Integra asked.“The Holy Father himself ordered me to protect you.” Heinkel said.“That's.... unexpected. Thank you.” Integra said. Heinkel nodded.“The news about Harry hit us hard, especially poor Yumie.” Heinkel said.“Don't give up hope. Harry said he'd find a way back and you know how determined he can be.” Integra said. She was distracted by the sound of loud chanting followed by an enormous orange glow forming in the distance.“Shit! They're building another portal!” Pip said.“Focus all fire on the wizards!” Integra shouted.“You should get to Harry's manor.” Heinkel said, pulling a pair of handguns out of her coat.“I can't just leave my men to die.” Integra said, retrieving her own weapon.“Regina's father is lost for now. Don't make her an orphan.” Heinkel said. Integra looked as though she'd been slapped.“I'm sorry, but Harry would never forgive me if I let you come to danger.” Heinkel said.“I know. I'm sorry, you're right...” Integra said.“Fuck, they're fast! It's opening!” Pip shouted.“Too late! Stay with me!” Heinkel shouted. They all ran towards the Portal to prepare to fight against another barely mortal monstrosity. Integra noticed Alucard rushing towards the portal from the south.“RESTRAINT LEVEL ZERO ALUCARD!” Integra shouted. Once again, without any theatrics, Count Dracula appeared in all of his medieval splendor, wielding a wicked blade and surrounded by a dark red aura. He was immediately surrounded by dozens of ghostly pikemen, with more and more of his vanquished foes phasing into existence with each passing moment. Seras' overwhelming power manifested into sea of crimson, with angry black energy crackling along it.“Your power approaches my own, Seras. We may just have a chance.” Alucard noted.“Shut up and get ready to kill what comes through.” Seras' disembodied voice growled. They saw a gargantuan, disgusting body start making its way through, this one obese and covered in what looked like infected sores. It took one step forward, then another, before it fell to its knees.“What the fuck?” Integra asked.“We haven't done anything yet.” Alucard said. The monster let out a gurgling squeak, before its head slid off and hit the ground and a fountain of putrid blood erupted from its neck.“I don't know whether to be happy or worried.” Integra said. Seras' aura receded, forming back into her normal body, which crumpled to her knees as she started bawling her eyes out.“Seras? What's wrong!?” Integra asked, after running over to her. She was shocked to see despite the tears her face was alight with a radiant smile and she was pointing upwards at the portal.“What?” Integra asked. As if to answer a dark mass appeared from behind the portal and slowly made its way into their reality. Integra let out an elated cry when she saw it for what it was. The area was filled with the sound of diesel-fueled propellers as an enormous zeppelin, crept through the portal, which snapped shut as its tail emerged.“What the fuck is that about?” Pip asked after jogging up to them.“It's Harry!” Seras cried, holding onto Integra for dear life.

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Chapter 2
As the last of the vampires fell, a figure in black sheathed his sword and pulled his hood back, revealing a man with burning green eyes, shoulder-length messy black hair and a silly grin.“Hello, Seras.” Harry said, holding his arms open. Seras dashed into them and cried hysterically. Integra arrived shortly after and Harry pulled her into the embrace, basking in their presence.“Hello to you too Integra. God I've missed you both.” Harry said.“You came back!” Seras said.“Of course, I made you a promise, remember?” Harry said. He squeezed them one last time before his smile faded.“We need to get aboard the Kashmir. Hogwarts is under attack as well.” Harry said.“Kashmir?” Integra asked. Harry grinned and pointed at the menacing airship hanging in the air a hundred feet overhead. The zeppelin seemed to have undergone massive modifications. The gondola was easily four times the original size and was fitted with dozens of guns, and the Balloon had been coated in a dull gray substance and also featured dozens of hard points upon which missiles of various sizes were fixed, and it featured twice as many engines as it had when they'd discovered it.“You took your sweet time..” Alucard said with a grin, as he made it over to them.“You have no idea... Come on, the wards at Hogwarts won't hold up forever. Pip can you take out any stragglers?” Harry asked.“Oui, we've got it covered. Glad to have you back, Emperor Potter.” Pip said with a sarcastic grin.“Potter-Victoria.” Harry said. He wrapped his arms around Integra, Seras and Alucard and prepared to apparate.“Watch those hands, Alucard.” Harry said with a grin. Alucard cackled before they all disappeared from the ground and reappeared inside the zeppelin. They arrived in what looked like a captain's quarters, there was a simple bed, a desk and a chair for said desk and little else. The only decorations were photographs in frames of Seras with Nicole, Integra with Regina, Zorin and Rip with Schrodinger, and a group photo of all of them with Hermione, Ron, Gideon and Daniel.“Before we go forward, there's something you need to know. I did not come back alone.” Harry said, scratching the back of his head.“What do you mean?” Integra asked.“Where I went, I ran into a group of beings that call themselves “infernals.” Wizards know them as lesser demons. They look a lot like the stereotypes. Red to black skin tone, horns, yellow eyes, tails etc. Some of them have wings. The thing is they're not innately bad. Like humans some of them aren't assholes.” Harry said.“Wait, so what about-” Integra said but was interrupted“Introductions!” Harry said pulling the door opening and leading them on to the bridge, which was swarming with infernals.“Voorg, can you come here for a sec?” Harry asked.“'Sup?” A seven foot beast of a demon with dull grey skin, no hair and two wicked looking horns said as it stomped over to them.“These are three of the most important people in my life. Alucard, and trust me you can't take him, Integra, the mother of my firstborn, and my beloved fiancee Seras.” Harry said. The infernal looked over and smiled, baring a set of wicked looking fangs.“Nice to meet you.” Voorg said, bowing.“Voorg is my second in command, hes a regional leader of the demonic rebellion. Voorg, can you set a course for hogwarts please?” Harry said.“Sure thing boss. Make sure your friends strap in.” Voorg said, stomping towards the controls.“He's not joking. Better take a seat and get in the harnesses.” Harry said, guiding Integra and Seras to their seats. He helped Integra first, flipping a plastic cover and pressing a button, then Seras, leaning in for a kiss once she was secured and her button was pressed. She smiled up at him.“No chair for me?” Alucard asked.“Sorry, mate. Don't worry it's really not that bad.” Harry said. Alucard shrugged and folded his arms.“Punch it!” Harry shouted. The airship blasted forward far, far faster than a vessel of its size should be able to.“CHRIST!” Integra screamed, clutching onto her armrests.“SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!” Alucard screamed as he flew backwards crashing into the wall, breaking several bones. Harry snickered.“Jesus, Harry. How fast are we going?” Seras asked.
“ETA 20 seconds.” Voorg said.“About 48,000 miles per hour.” Harry said.“Grghhkk...” Alcuard said, spouting a gout of blood.“Why are you and they still upright?” Integra asked. Harry pointed at a badge on his shirt with a glowing rune on it.“Didn't have time to make more, sorry love.” Harry said.“How am I not dead? Human beings can't survive that kind of acceleration!” Integra observed. Harry frowned.“You're gonna be mad.” Harry said. She gave him a deadpan stare. Harry sighed and flipped the plastic cover on the button on her armrest open. Underneath it was a glowing button, shaped like a muffin.“All of the buttons on the ship are shaped like that, we have no idea why. Also 10 seconds.” Voorg said.“F-fucking k-kill youuuuu!” Alcuard growled, clawing at the wall behind him.“I'm too happy to see you to be angry right now.” Integra said, grinning.“Oh hey look we're here.” Harry said.“FFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!” Alucard yelled as he flew across the bridge, colliding with the opposite wall.“Status!” Harry cried, freeing Seras and Integra.“Two greater demons attacking the castle! Wards are still up! Looks like hundreds of vampires and wizards!” Voorg said.“Glaives?” Harry asked.“Still recharging.” Voorg said. Harry cursed.“Ground pound it is. Integra, I want you up here, we can't protect you from them yet, coordinate with Voorg. You lot, In my absence, Integra's word is law, understand? If she gives you an order you obey it as though it comes from me.” Harry said, a clear warning in his voice.“Yes sir!” The remaining demons said, except Voorg who just shrugged. Alucard, who had just finished reconstituting his body, scowled and stomped up to him.“Alucard, use your discretion regarding control art restriction. I will be watching.” Integra said.“Of course, my master.” Alucard said, grabbing Harry by his shoulder and squeezing it far harder than was necessary.“I want the foot soldiers on the ground now. Shall we, my darling?” Harry asked, offering Seras his elbow. She smiled and took it.They apparated down to the grounds and saw, much to Harry's delight, that the parapets were manned both by magicals, including older students, and Filch and his company of squib soldiers, firing quite effectively on the humanoid enemies.“Alucard stay back a bit.” Harry ordered.“Holy magic?” Alucard asked.“Holy magic.” Harry said. Alucard leapt back and started transforming.“Uh, Harry?” Seras said.“It can't hurt you any more, remember?” Harry said. Seras nodded, still wary. Harry withdrew the Elder Wand and pointed it, closing his eyes.“Keep them off me while I set this up please” Harry said. Seras was already halfway through decapitating a 2nd gen vampire that tried to take advantage of his situation.“You got it, love.” Seras said. A dome of white light appeared, surrounding Harry. Seras flew in and out of it eviscerating vampires as they tried to take him down. Harry opened his eyes, and Seras was shocked, the green glow she'd been accustomed to had been replaced by white as he levitated, several meters into the air. Alucard appeared across the field, flying in the air, firing at one greater demon while Baskerville was glefully chasing and devouring wizards.“B-beauiful!” Seras cried. The area was bathed in a dazzling, blinding white light as holy magic exploded from Harry, vaporizing the remaining vampires on the battlefield, and leaving the wizards blinded. Harry fell to the ground, landing perfectly on his feet and withdrew the sword of Gryffindor.“Ready, dearest?” Harry asked with a grin. Seras nodded, her eyes bright and a smile on her face as they rushed the closest greater demon. Seras' hands morphed into enormous, wicked looking claws, just as she flung herself into the air, her body surrounded by a crimson aura, tearing into the giant's abdomen, spilling its intestines. Harry followed suit, landing on its shoulders, driving the sword into the monster's neck. It howled in agony, one hand trying in vain to keep its organs inside while the other was swatting at Harry like a mosquito. He deftly dodged and pulled the sword out driving it again into the other side of his neck, the tip poking out through its throat. A fountain of blood sprayed out of the beast's ruined neck as it flailed, spraying its foul blood all over the magical dome that surrounded the castle.“MOTHERFUCKER!” Alucard shouted as his demon threw him to the ground.“Quit playing around, man.” Harry shouted, before driving his sword into the felled beast's brain. Alucard grinned and dissolved into a cloud of bats that swirled around like a tornado around the remaining beast, slowly turning into a blood red aura that crackled with black energy. It flailed around wildly, unable to get ahold of him. When it roared, Alucard took advantage, as the aura flew into the beasts mouth. It clutched at its neck and gagged before bending over and vomiting thousands of gallons of blood onto the ground. It stood to its full height, staggering back before collapsing into a sitting position. It let out a distorted screech for a few moments before its head exploded and it fell over on its side, dead.“Finish 'em off! Watch out for the boy!” Filch shouted.“Retreat!” One of the remaining wizards shouted.“Apparition wards!” another shouted.“Fuck!” The first one shouted. Harry smiled fondly as a black and red blur flew between the fleeing wizards, ripping off limbs as the others were picked off by sniper fire and killing curses. Seras caught up to him and stood beside him. Harry sniffled, catching her attention. Tears shone in his eyes as he stood and watched.“Harry?” Seras asked. The black blur came to a stop, its hands transformed into claws which were dripping with wizard blood.“That's my boy.” Harry said.“Dad?!” Schrodigner cried, before launching himself into Harry's arms.

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Chapter 3
Integra, Seras and Schrodinger stood there amongst the dead wizards, ash piles and rapidly decaying greater demon corpses holding onto Harry for dear life. Harry was barely able to contain himself until Voorg stomped over and waited for his moment to speak.“Boss, you got orders?” Voorg asked.“Return with the Kashmir to Hellsing and wait, please. We'll find our own way.” Harry said.“You got it.” Voorg said, taking his leave.“Let's get back to Hellsing, Zorin and Rip don't know what's up.” Harry said.“We sent them through to the Manor, with the girls.” Integra said.“Even better.” Harry said, apparating the four of them to the entrance at the manor. When they arrived, Harry picked up Integra and they all ran blindingly fast up the stairs and down the hall until they stood outside of the nursery, where they could hear Zorin crying.“Fuck..” Harry said.“Harry?!” Zorin cried, immediately crossing the room and ripping the door off its hinges.“Huh... Thought I reinforced that...” Harry said with a grin.“You did!” Zorin cried before launching herself at Harry who had levatated himself a foot in the air to meet her.“You bastard!” Rip cried, joining her. Harry chuckled as he could hear the babies start crying.“Hi girls.” Harry said over Zorin's shoulder.“Harry? Why is your hair so much longer?” Rip asked. Harry's shoulders slumped.“It's a long story, and I can tell you're hungry, Zorin. Come on, after everyone's eaten I'll tell you.” Harry said.
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Half an hour or so later they sat, Harry uncaring of the four pairs of puncture wounds on his neck and arms which were healing rapidly, sipped a cup of tea, savoring it.“Time is a funny thing...” Harry said.“Oh no...” Integra said. Harry nodded at her.When my body passed through the portal, the first thing I noticed is that the zeppelin wasn't moving. I looked through the the rear windows at the part of the zeppelin still on this side, and saw the propellers were just barely turning, it didn't take me long to put two and two together. It only took a few hours to break through the rune traps, and when I did I left the ship and started exploring.The other side is weird. At least the part I showed up in. It looked a lot like the Grand Canyon. Arid, lots of hills and plateaus, sparse vegetation. I figured the zeppelin wasn't going any where so I made my way out looking to see if I could find civilization. Then.. I did.” Harry said.“The Infernals?” Seras asked. Harry nodded.“Chained up like animals, breaking rocks with pickaxes. There was this big troll-looking motherfucker snapping a whip at them, found out later they're called ogres, probably the inspiration for the old fantasy trope. I killed it, and freed the Infernals, and they explained their situation. The Greater demons are puppets, being controlled by an upper class of Infernals to exploit the 'lower class' Infernals.” Harry said.“I liberated the camp they were based out of and we took to the cave system in the canyon near where the Kashmir was stuck in the portal. They told me that a being on the other side had made a deal with the Upper Class Infernals, promising to usher them through to the 'promised land' but not until Humanity has been subjugated. It took a long time but I managed to win their trust and they helped me outfit the Kashmir with new weapons, armor, and helped me build the new engine.” Harry explained.“I noticed the new armor, can it really protect the ship against the monsters?” Integra asked. Harry shook his head.“No, the Infernals are sensitive to radiation, and our sun is very intense. More than an hour or so in direct sunlight is dangerous to them.” Harry said. Seras groaned and Harry grinned.“So... it needs to shield against radiation.... It's name is Kashmir... you made a lead zeppelin, didn't you?” Seras asked. Harry giggled and nodded.“Hermione is going to smack you.” Integra said, unable to hide her grin.“After all this time I'll welcome it.” Harry said.“How long was it on the other side?” Seras asked. Harry frowned.“Anyone catch the the harpies game?” Harry asked.“Harry...” Integra said. Harry sighed and his gaze fell to the floor.“Two years.” Harry said quietly.
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Thaelynn Stonebrook boarded the Kashmir, completely unconcerned about the dangerous looking crew, inspecting the inner workings and excitedly taking notes.“How does the main engine work?” Thaeylnn asked.“Harry said they work similarly to your jet engines, except fueled by magic instead of jet fuel.” Rakka, the Chief Engineer amongst the Infernals said, adopting a slower stride to avoid losing her.“Interesting...” Thaelynn said, scratching notes on a notepad.“Tell me, Dwarf, why are you not afraid of us?” Rakka asked. Thaelynn looked up from her notepad and shrugged.“When you spend as much time with Harry and Alucard as I have, beings of literally apocalyptic levels of power, it takes a lot to freak you out.” Thaelynn said, before smirking.“Knowing what they'd do to anyone who would dare to harm me is also a factor.” Thaelynn said. Rakka laughed.“I'm glad. Harry warned us that most people around here would fear us.” Rakka said.“You vaguely resemble what they think evil creatures from some of their religious lore would look like. So many people think they're on the side of good, but tend to act otherwise. Iscariot is a great example of that, though there were those amongst them that were truly decent.” Thaelynn said.“Anderson, right?” Rakka asked, opening up a control panel and gesturing for Thaelynn to look.“Yes, and his friends, Yumie, Yumiko and Heinkel. Good people, though definitely keep a wide berth until Harry gets a chance to chat with them. Anderson is strong enough to fight Alucard to a standstill unless Integra lets him off the leash.” Thaelynn said, carefully pulling a wire bundle aside to expose a mechanism underneath.“Why don't you put these wires in conduit? A harsh enough bump might knock them into the mechanism and break them.” Thaelynn asked.“We're planning on completely redoing those wire runs, a lot of this is shitty Millennium design.” Rakka said. Thaelynn nodded and stepped back, wiping sweat off her brow.“So, I don't see a lot of other women here.” Thaelynn observed. Rakka grinned.“Not a lot of us pursue engineering, most of the women on the crew are warriors. They're probably on the ground helping Harry's forces scour the forest.” Rakka said, leaning against the wall and crossing her arms.“Do those work?” Thaelynn asked, gesturing at Rakka's wings.“Mine don't. I can use them to glide short distances, but they're too small for flight, but we have jetpacks for that.” Rakka said.“Jetpacks?!?” Thaelynn asked excitedly. Rakka laughed and gestured for her to follow, which she did. Rakka lead her to an armory filled with strange looking weapons, and dull-gray plated armor of all sizes including two huge suits which seemed to have mechanical components underneath the armor plating.“Wow you wouldn't see this stuff on one of our subs.” Thaelynn said, marveling at the items.“What's a sub?” Rakk asked.“Submarine. It's a ship that goes under the water.” Thaelynn explained. Rakka's eyes widened.“Harry said there was a lot of water on this world, is there really so much you can sail ships underneath the surface?” Rakka asked.“Most of the world is covered in water, though most of it is too salty to drink. We have to process it first.” Thaelynn said.“Gods...” Rakka said.“Not a lot where you're from?” Thaelynn asked. Rakka shook her head.“No, that's part of the reason they want to cross over to this world so much. Dehydration was an inevitability until Harry came to us.” Rakka said. Thaelynn nodded.“Wizards can conjure water. Shame they can't conjure food.” Thaelynn said.“No, but he gave us so much water we could grow more than enough to sustain ourselves. If the Highborn ever found out how much we had we'd have been doomed. Water is power back there.” Rakka said.
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Harry crept out of bed, his legs wobbling and a ridiculous smile on his face. It was around three in the morning and he was desperately in need of food and drink. He'd tried to make up for two years in one night, and felt they'd done an admirable job. Thankfully, Integra had offered to watch Nicole for the night. Harry had left her with more than enough blood, and Integra's breast milk was perfectly suitable for both babies, as was Seras'.“Harry...” Alucard said, poking his head around the corner just as Harry left his room.“What's up?” Harry said. Alucard produced a pair of scissors and grinned.“Time for a hair cut, hippie.” Alucard said. Harry laughed and followed him down the hall, after grabbing a plate of his beloved blueberry muffins, and a glass of grapefruit juice. Harry sat in a chair and placed his food on the table while Alucard got to work.“Two years, eh?” Alucard said.“Yeah. It was awful.” Harry said.“Well to immortals like us, two years isn't really that bad.” Alucard said.“Two years away from Seras... away from my babies...” Harry said trailing off.“Ah... yes that is worse.” Alucard said.“For the next few weeks it's going to take an act of god to pry me away from any of you guys. The Infernals are great people, and good friends, but you lot are my family.” Harry said. Alucard was touched, but refused to make any indication of that.“Why did it take so long?” Alucard asked.“The first few months we were waiting for the ass end of the ship to make it out of the portal, once that was done, the crystals that powered the portal had to recharge. Normally that takes twenty years of direct sunlight, but I was able to speed it up a little. While we waited, we overhauled the Kashmir and made it safe for my new crew.” Harry said.“I'd have gone with Black Dog.” Alucard said grinning.“Hah! I knew you'd get it. Nah, I didn't want Sirius to get big-headed about it.” Harry said.“What's your next step?” Alucard asked.“I placed one end of one of my portals inside their old headquarters and tomorrow I'm going to Antarctica to build the other end and connect it.” Harry said.“Why Antarctica?” Alucard asked.“My portals don't have the same restrictions as theirs, they wont' require a group of wizards chanting on one end, and the Infernals couldn't survive the cold of a Scottish winter let alone Antarctica. It's an insurance policy.” Harry said.“Why build it at all though?” Alucard asked.“The crew comprises a small percentage of the resistance. The rest remain in stasis on the other side. I'll bring them through, bury the portal under a glacier, and bring them back to England to wake them up. They're willing to help us because we're going up against their old masters and their allies.” Harry said.“Are you sure that's wise? How many of them are there?” Alucard asked.“Quarter of a million, give or take.” Harry said, ruthlessly surpressing the urge to shrug, given that Vlad the Impaler was currently holding razor-sharp scissors very close to a lot of his vital blood vessels.“Jesus..” Alucard said.“We need an army. Their former masters plan to send twenty times that through if we can't stop them. Thankfully their slave army is pretty weak and unskilled.” Harry said.“Five million?!?” Alcuard shouted.“Shh! The girls are sleeping!” Harry said.“Sorry. Still, that's insane!” Alucard said.“That's nothing compared to the hundreds of those behemoths they're preparing to unleash. Thankfully they're nowhere near ready to do that. It'll take at least a thousand years on their end to prepare everything, so in the meantime they're taking pot shots to try and test our resolve, and hopefully soften us up.” Harry said.“So a thousand years there....” Alucard said“Around four months here.” Harry said.“Bugger.” Alucard said.“Bugger indeed.” Harry said.

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Chapter 4
Harry awoke the next morning to the sound of snickering. He felt someone playing with his hair.“Stahppit!” Harry said, gently swatting at his tormentor. This resulted in a cute giggle. He gave up on going back to sleep and rolled over looking at Seras.“Good morning, love.” Harry said.“Good morning, Moe.” Seras said laughing.“Wha?” Harry asked. Seras laughed even harder and pointed at the mirror. Harry sat up and stared in shock at his reflection. Where he once had long, messy hair he now had a ridiculous bowl cut. His mind flashed back to the late-night discussion he had with Alucard who for some reason he'd invited to stay the night at his manor. He was now regretting it.“Alucard...” Harry growled. He got up and rummaged through his potions supplies before producing a cloudy grey potion in an unusually large flask. He sighed, and tipped the flask into his mouth, gagging several times as he forced himself to swallow the ungodly concoction. He gasped for air after the last bit of it slid down his throat and struggled not to vomit.“What's that?” Seras asked.“Hair growth potion. Won't take effect for a couple hours I'm afraid.” He said, stepping into their shower.“Make sure nobody else gets caught in the crossfire.” Seras said, putting a dressing gown on and walking to the shared door to the nursery, where Integra was feeding Regina.“Good morning.” Seras said, walking over to a fussing Nicole.“Thanks for watching them.” Seras asked.“Thanks for remembering the muffling charm.” Integra said with a smirk. Seras grinned.“He was quite enthusiastic.” Seras said, smiling contentedly.“Yeah, good for you.” Integra said, rolling her eyes.“I really wish you would find someone.” Seras said. Integra shrugged.“I'm not quite ready for that just yet.” Integra said, not meeting her gaze.“Still?” Seras asked, not unkindly. Integra's shoulder slumped.“I was just getting there, then we lost him and now he's come back to us.... God I feel like such a fool.” Integra said.“The heart wants what the heart wants.” Seras said sadly. Integra shrugged, looking dejected. Seras looked pensive.“Integra... Um... Can I ask you a question?” Seras asked.“Of course.” Integra said.
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“Good morning, Mister Howard.” Alucard said with a shit-eating grin while Pip laughed behind him as Harry arrived at the Hellsing manor. Harry's eyes narrowed. Faster than either could react, Harry withdrew his wand and slashed at it both of them. Alucard frowned and Pip looked panicked.“Oh no....” Pip said, reaching up feeling the top of his head which now featured curly hair and a receeding hairline.“You'd better not have....” Alucard said, slowly raising his hands to his head, and feeling nothing but smooth flesh where his hair used to be.“Can it, Chowderheads.” Harry said with a grin, before turning and running.“WHY, I OUGHTTA!” Alucard shouted before taking off after them, just as Integra with Regina and Seras with Nicole stepped in from the Portal room.“Well I'm glad two years in hell didn't dampen his sense of humor.” Integra said, smiling as Harry dodged just out of Alucard's grasp.“Seriously, Integra. Think about it, ok?” Seras said.“I will....” Integra said.“Ow!” Alucard cried, pressing his hands over his eyes.“Nyuk nyuk nyuk!” Harry shouted. He took off andalmost made it past Pip who grabbed him in a full nelson and held him there while Alucard grinned savagely and stalked towards them. Harry struggled to free himself, but Pip was an accomplished grappler.“Uh guys...” Harry said.“Oh you've had this coming for a while, little wizard.” Alucard said.“And that's our cue. Bye Harry!” Integra said, leading Seras across the hall.“Traitors!” Harry cried as he struggled to break free from Pip.“Nothing permanent, Alucard...” Seras warned.“No promises...” Alcuard said, meancingly as he closed in on Harry.Seras and Integra stopped by Rip and Zorin's bedroom to collect their friends for a trip to Diagon Alley. Now that they were well and truly assured that Harry was back, they decided to treat themselves to ice cream. Zorin's emotional rollercoaster of a pregnancy had only been made worse by Harry's six hour/two year departure, so they decided some normalcy would not go amiss.They arrived at Florean Fortescue's which was unusually busy however Luna sent Helena over to take their order while she handled the line that had formed. The woman at the front of the line went to protest until she saw Zorin and paled. Zorin grumbled.“Perhaps I should have the tattoos removed..” Zorin said.“Don't you dare, they're part of who you are.” Seras said.“I should go over there and smack her...” Rip said.“Not worth the paperwork.” Integra said. Helena arrived with their order and placed it on their table.“How much? I have both magical and muggle currency.” Seras said.“No charge.” Helena said with a smile.“I insist.” Seras said.“It's already been paid for.” Helena said, gesturing towards the woman who was now slowly making her way over.“Hello, I'm sorry to bother you. I just wanted to say thank you... During the battle of London you saved my children.” The woman said, struggling not to cry.“Oh....” Zorin said, looking surprised. The woman nodded.“They were trapped in a school bus, just before Harry killed that monster, I believe you wrenched the door off of a burning bus and rescued the children inside.” The woman said.“They made it?! I couldn't track them down after the fight...” Zorin said. The woman nodded with a smile and tears welling up in her eyes.“Every one of them. Thank you... Thank you so much!” The woman said. Zorin got to her feet and approached, taking the woman in her arms.“It was my pleasure.” Zorin said, her own eyes welling up.“Make sure your baby knows its mommy is a hero.” The woman said, pointing at her belly. Zorin broke off the embrace and smiled at her as she walked back to the counter to collect her own order. Zorin stared after her, vacantly.“Are you okay, love?” Rip asked. Zorin sniffled.“She called me a hero....” Zorin said. Integra smiled and reached into her clutch, retrieving a box of tissues, handing it to Zorin who burst out crying. Rip smiled and held her.“Strange, isn't it? Not too long ago we were flying around in zeppelins wearing those awful uniforms...” Rip said.“I'm sorry. These damn hormones....” Zorin said, wiping at her eyes.“I'm not complaining about the hormones...” Rip said with a lecherous grin, laughing when Zorin elbowed her in the gut.“Howdy, bitches!” Luna said, effortlessly tossing a knut over her shoulder, grinning when she heard it land in the jar.“Luna, how are you?” Rip asked.“I'm well.” Luna said, her expression falling.“Is Harry okay? I heard what happened.” Luna said.“I think he's still processing it. It took a couple of times for him to remember how to change Nicole, and that really upset him. He's just so glad it was only six hours on our side.” Seras said.“Speaking of Nicole...” Luna said. Seras grinned and handed the near-toddler to Luna who grunted when she felt how heavy she was.“Merlin she's big.” Luna said laughing as Nicole giggled and reached for Luna's trademark radish earrings.“She should be ready for preschool next year.” Seras said.“Do dhampirs develop mentally as fast as they do physically?” Luna asked.“According to Alucard, 'sort of'.' Their brains physically mature much faster but a lot of growing up is experience and learning. We'll have to push her to make sure she's ready, but given her daddy's intellect I doubt that will be much of a problem.” Seras said.“A-card!” Nicole said.“Don't sell yourself short, Seras. I received your service record with the police force when you came aboard. Your competency tests were well above average, you had the highest scores in your precinct.” Integra said. Seras blushed.“She's saying Alucard's name now, eh? Harry must have loved that.” Luna said with a grin.“He pretended to be offended, but he knows that the reason she says Mama, Alucard and Integra is because He spends so much time with her, saying their names.” Integra said.“Is she on solids yet?” Luna asked.“Yes, though I'm still breastfeeding her.” Seras said.“Excellent! One Harry vanilla ice cream coming up!” Helena said.“How much blood did Harry leave here?” Seras asked. Luna opened the door in the back and grinned when Seras' jaw dropped. Harry had left and preserved a dozen plastic barrels labeled “Harry Juice” one of which was half-full.“Enough.” Luna said, closing the door.“Bi-ches!” Nicole said. Seras laughed and dropped a knut in the jar.

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Chapter 5.
Harry was laying on a hospital bed in Hellsing's infirmary, his bed next to one containing a scowling Pip cradling a bruised arm and on the third bed was Alucard's head, detached from its body, grinning like a maniac.“Zat is just creepy.” Pip said. Alucard tried speaking but made no sound, given his lack of lungs at the moment.“What did he say?” Pip asked.“Stop being a pussy, Pip.” Harry said, laughing, while poking at he wooden stake jutting out of his abdomen.“Merde.” Pip said“Don't be a little bitch, I fixed your hair and all you got is a bruise.” Harry said, sitting up, groaning slightly as the broken off piece of table leg settled into its new position inside his body.“What I don't understand is why you haven't done anything about zat, and why he hasn't done anything about zat!” Pip said first pointing at Harry's abdomen.“You clearly haven't been paying attention the whole time you've known us.” Harry said.“Okay, Mister Potter-Victoria, I was told you had a splinter OH JESUS CHRIST DON'T MOVE!” The medic said, panicking when seeing the bloody mess sitting on a bed with a chunk of wood hanging out of him.“Isn't this where you say 'Is that a stake in your gut, or are you happy to see me?” Harry asked. Alucard laughed so hard he rolled off his bed. Pip sighed.“Next time warn me zere is a new hire...” Pip said. Harry laughed before screaming while wrenching the wood out of his body.“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!!” the medic asked.“Relax, it'll be fine. Bitchy McBitcherson over here has bump on his arm and I think he needs a lollypop.” Harry said gesturing at Pip“Hey!” Pip cried.“Wasn't there three of you?” The medic said, barely able to catch his breath.“BOO!” Alucard shouted from behind him. The medic shrieked and ran out of the room, terrified. Harry sighed.“Looks like we need to start looking at resumes again.” Harry said.“Why does Integra let you do that?” Pip asked, shaking his head.“Well for a couple of reasons. One, we need medics that don't waste time asking too many questions when they're presented with implausible, supernatural bullshit like we see in our day to day. Scaring the shit out of them on day 1 lets us know who can keep a cool head under pressure.” Harry said.“And ze other reason?” Pip asked.“It does wonders for our morale.” Alucard said. Harry ran and hugged Seras, Nicole, Integra, Regina, Rip and Zorin as they walked in through the portal.“How are Luna and Helena?” Harry asked.“Good. How did the new hire do?” Integra asked.“Well, at least this one didn't leave a trail of urine out the door.” Harry said. Alucard giggled.“Christ..” Integra said.“Should we perhaps look for a magical?” Pip asked.“Are you kidding? Poppy is the exception, not the rule, at least for now, and no we are not going to try to hire Poppy. The last thing I need is her tackling me in the hall and forcing potions down my throat.” Harry said.“Hmm. She's in her sixties, right?” Alucard asked. Harry grinned savagely.“Yup, and she's single... go right ahead, Alucard!” Harry said.“She used to be a vampire hunter didn't she?” Alucard said, his expression falling.“Her license is still current.” Harry said laughing. He noticed Nicole fussing with a small cord bracelet on her left wrist.“Wow, you already need a bigger one.” Harry said.“I was going to ask about that, what is her bracelet for?” Pip asked.“Babies don't exactly have a lot of self control, and Dhampirs are ridiculously strong, especially since she's Seras' baby. And we don't need daddy's little banshee breaking any more arms, do we?” Harry said, teasing Nicole who started giggling.“Banshee?” Seras asked with a grin.“Have you heard the pipes on this little pipsqeak?” Harry asked.“Ban-hee!” Nicole said.
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“Jesus fuck it's cold....” Alucard said, shivering in his coat.“I warned you.” Harry said, rearranging the newly cut block of ice he'd created out of the ground and off to the side.“Why this place specifically?” Alucard asked.“We don't want it anywhere near Vostok station. The last thing we need is for the Russian Federation to accidentally find a portal to hell.” Harry said, transfiguring the ice block into an enormous steel bar and leaping into the cubical space he'd created in the ice.“Good point.. Still getting used to not calling them the soviet union.” Alucard said. Harry bent the steel bar into an arch and embedded it into the hole in the ice he'd carved, before leaping down and waving his wand.“You gonna pass out on me?” Alucard asked.“No, my core's a lot stronger than it was two years... a few days ago.” Harry said, suddenly looking distracted.“Two years is a long time, Harry, not knowing whether you'd be able to return to them. Do remember what you told Schrodinger about sharing burdens.” Alucard offered.“Yeah... Thanks.” Harry said. With that, what looked like shimmering silk snapped into existence within the arch and resolved into pitch black. Harry frowned.“That's not right...” Harry said.“What?” Alucard said.“I left an illumination orb on the other side... it should have been good for millennia.” Harry said. He shrugged.“Be ready to bury the arch.” Harry said, looking up at Alucard who was standing on the edge.“Be careful..” Alucard said. Harry nodded and walked through the portal. Once through he produced a lumos and raised it up to the ceiling of the cavern he'd left the portal in. The room shook and a few small rocks and some dust fell down from the ceiling.“Shit..” Harry said out loud. He looked around and cursed.“Damnit....” Harry said. There were several dessicated Infernal corpses, all with grievous wounds. He walked over to an enormous stone sarcophagus that he'd left and waved his wand over it. The runes glowed gold and he nodded.“At least everyone's still alive in there.” The cavern shook again, then again.“Footsteps.. big ones..” Harry observed. His eyes widened and he picked the sarcophagus off the ground and started towards the portal. The room shook wildly and he heard a rock slide behind him and saw light pour in.“THERE!” A raspy voice cried behind him.“KILL THE INTERLOPER!” a deep, rumbling voice from outside bellowed.“Fuck off.” Harry said, dislodging several thousands of rock from the ceiling, crushing the infernals attempting to get in. He put the sarcophagus down and picked up a baseball-sized rock. He grabbed his pocket knife and carved a few runes into the rock before nicking his finger and bleeding into them. The rock levatated at about eye-level to Harry and started slowly spinning.“Demolition!” Harry heard someone bellow from the other side.“Have fun with this, assholes.” Harry said, retrieving the sarcophagus and shrinking it, putting it in his pocket and running to the portal. He looked back and grinned when the rock glowed bright yellow and was spinning wildly.Alucard had the peculiar experience of seeing Harry's left foot rise up and step into the portal simultaneously as his face emerged directly above it, going the other direction. He had no time to muse over it however, when Harry leapt into the air and slammed into him, tackling him to the ice a hundred meters away.“What the fu-JESUS!!!” Alucard shouted just as an enormous gout of flame erupted from the hole Harry'd made in the ice, forming a mushroom cloud hundreds of meters high.“I'm pretty sure that wrecked the portal, but stay here while I bury it.” Harry said. Alucard nodded vacantly as he stared in awe at the explosion. The flames quickly died down and Harry made short work of the glacier, burying the twisted remains of the arch under thousands of tons of ice and rubble.“Explain that one, future anthropologists!” Harry said with a grin as he walked over to Alucard, grabbing his hand.“Harry wha-” Alucard said before Harry apparated them out of there and back into the main hall of his manor.“Harry! Did everything work out?” Integra asked. Harry nodded, patting his pocket.“Unfortunately the guards that watched over them didn't make it. They must have been attacked. They managed to cave the entrance in and protect the rest. They were trying to break through when I arrived.” Harry said.“Why were they there the day you decided to return?” Alucard asked.“The Greater Demons and their masters are very attuned to magic. They probably felt it when I created the portal. For me it was less than a minute, on their end it was almost two days.” Harry said.“What about the portal?” Integra asked, anxiously.“Not a problem.” Harry said with a grin. When everyone looked at him impatiently, he rolled his eyes.“I took a rock, and inscribed it with two opposing runes, powered by my blood. The two opposing forces build up against each other until the atomic structure of the rock becomes unstable, neutrons start flying then that interacts with the portal and.... kablooey on both sides. Both ends of the portal were annihilated.” Harry said.“Harry did you nuke Antarctica?” Integra asked, pinching the bridge of her nose.“Maaaayyyybe...” Harry said with a grin,.“Harry there's no way the world's governments wouldn't have noticed that!!!!” Seras cried.“The reaction leaves only trace amounts of radiation, and an explosion along with a crater that looks exactly like a meteor strike. There's also chunks of rubble mixed into it as well. Unless you were watching us at the time, which nobody was because it's winter in Antarctica thousands of miles from any of the scientific research stations, then there's literally no way to differentiate my magical nuke from an asteroid strike.” Harry said, folding his arms and looking smug.“I'm telling Hermione.” Integra said.“PLEASE GOD NO I'LL DO ANYTHING!!!!” Harry begged

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Chapter 6
“Ms... Mihaela McNuexistă?” a security offcer at Leonardo da Vinci–Rome Fiumicino Airport said to a smartly dressed young girl with long black hair and flat bangs as well as curiously red eyes.“That's me!” Alucard said, disguised in his 'girlycard' form.“Purpose of visit?” The officer said“Religious pilgrimage.” Alucard said, snickering.“And you, sir?” The officer asked Harry.“Alexandru McNuexistă, Taking my daughter to see the sights.” Harry said in a ridiculously bad fake Romanian accent. Alucard glared at him.“Your accent is interesting...” The officer said, giving him a sidelong glance.“I'm from rural Wallahcia, Bleh, bluh bleh.” Harry said. A little bit of wandless magic lowered the red flags waving furiously in the officer's mind. He grinned when he saw Alucard trying to glare a hole in him.“Well everything checks out. Welcome to Rome.” The officer said, handing their paperwork back.“Thank you. Say thank you, Mihaela.” Harry said.“Thank you....” Alucard growled through gritted teeth. They calmly walked out of the airport and a few blocks away before Harry bolted, laughing his ass off while running from what looked like a fourteen year old girl.“I don't say bleh buh bleh!” Alucard yelled, not bothering to mask his true voice.“I just recorded that!” Harry shouted, ducking into a metro station. Alucard roared inarticulately. Five minutes later they were sitting on a train. Harry was smiling, despite the black eye, and Alucard's arms were folded while he glowered. He had returned to his normal form in the bathroom at the station while Harry bought tickets.“Why are we even here anyway?” Alucard asked.“We're here because you lost a bet. Also he wanted me to visit.” Harry said.“Why didn't you bring your big blonde papist friend?” Alucard asked.“I don't think you and he being this close to the Vatican together is a good idea.” Harry said.“And why was it that flew in a plane instead of apparating?” Alucard asked. Harry shrugged.“I had frequent flier miles.” Harry said. They got off their stop and made their way back out into the city, meeting up with their contact who guided them towards St. Peter's Basilica. They were seated in a room and asked to wait.“Interesting...” Harry observed.“What?” Alucard asked.“Half expected you to burst into flames.” Harry said grinning. Alucard laughed.“I was curious about that myself.” Alucard said. The door opened and Harry stood, dragging Alucard to his feet when he initially remained seated, the pope was guided into the room along with several Swiss Guards.“Your eminence...” Harry said, kissing the Pope's ring.“'Suuuup?” Alucard said, ignoring Harry stomping on his foot.“The infamous Alucard I presume?” The Pope said. Harry nudged him and he rolled his eyes.“Vlad Tepes III, Voivode of Wallachia, aka Dracula, aka Alucard, aka Thecrimsonfuckr at your service.” Alucard said, bowing theatrically.“aka Mihaela McNuexistă.” Harry added.“Can it, chowderhead.” Alucard said with a grin.“We came by for a couple of reasons, your eminence. Alucard?” Harry said.“Do I have to?” Alucard whined.“You lost the bet.” Harry said, folding his arms and giving him a stern expression. Alucard rolled his eyes.“I'm sorry for all the death threats.” Alucard said“And?” Harry asked.“And signing you up for all of those erectile dysfunction medical trials.” Alucard added.“And?” Harry asked, grinning.“And tying a banner to the Christ the Redeemer statue in Rio that says '420YOLOSWAG4JESUS'” Alucard said.“All is forgiven, my son.” The pope said.“Ow...” Alucard said clutching his chest. Harry laughed.“What is wrong?” The Pope asked.“Forgiveness from the pope, or really any ordained member of the church hits him like holy magic or a blessed weapon. He'll be fine.” Harry explained. Alucard rolled his eyes again.“Jesus, dude you're five more than hundred years older than me and you're acting like a teenager.” Harry said. Alucard gasped.“You used the Lord's name in vain in front of the pope!” Alucard said, clutching non-existent pearls.“Right.. Sorry about that.” Harry said, positioning himself behind Alucard and winking.“You are forvgiven.” The pope said“Oww! Damnit Harry!” Alucard said. The pope laughed, and his guards were struggling not to.“This has been a wonderful diversion, however there is a more serious matter I wished to discuss with you.” The Pope said, inviting them to sit, which they did.“What's the matter?” Harry asked.“The Nova Inquisitionis are on the move, and have a new leader.” The Pope said.“That's upsetting...” Harry said.“Indeed. What's more, is that this leader is perhaps.... not entirely human.” The Pope said.“What?” Alucard asked.“They've severed any official ties with the church, however there are hundreds of them who Matrograno managed to corrupt, and they are still loyal to their cause. Their new leader appears to be.... modifying them.” The Pope said.“That's not good.” Alucard said, helpfully.“What else do we know about the new leader?” Harry asked. One of the Swiss Guards handed him a manila envelope with a dossier, including a blurry photograph of dozens of men in liturgical vestments bowing in front of a man in a black, hooded robe.“I've seen him before.. in Grundig's memories. He's working with millennium too.” Harry said, reading through the documents included.“No name, he's been spotted all around the world, sightings on different continents within minutes of each other.... Either there are many of them, or they have some sort of magic.” Harry said.“We were concerned about that. We provide you with any more information as it comes.” The Pope said.“Thank you. If for any reason you feel like you're about to be attacked, make your way to Stati Magia here in Rome, it's your best bet until I can get here.” Harry said.“I will. Armando here is a wizard, he can apparate me out of here at a moment's notice.” The Pope said.“That's surprisingly progressive...” Alucard observed. The pope sighed and stood, walking to the other side of the room.“God works in mysterious ways. I know it's an old cliché, but it is true. As I have seen for myself in you, Harry, is that wizards are capable of great acts of virtue. Who am I to say that God didn't put your kind here to do his work?” The Pope asked.“Well... you're kind of the only human that has that kind of swing with the big man.” Alucard said, grinning. The Pope chuckled.“I'm afraid my obligations require me to make this visit a short one.” The Pope said. Harry and Alucard stood. The Pope came in and shook Harry's hand. Alucard patted the Pope on the back.“Hands off, demon!” one of the Swiss guards said.“Peace, Grigori. A being as powerful as he is could kill us all with little effort, it's clear he did not mean to do harm. Besides....” The Pope said, looking intently at Alucard.“No doubt Harry would not allow him to.” The Pope said. Alucard laughed and the guards backed down, guiding the Pope out of the room. When the Pope turned Harry's eyes widened and Alucard snickered. They left the Basilica on foot and made their way to a secluded alley to apparate back to Rome.“Did you seriously stick a note that says 'your mother sucks cocks in hell' on the pope's back?” Harry asked.“Did you seriously not stop me?” Alucard asked.
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“You're still on about that?” Sirius asked. Harry shrugged.“You gotta have goals.” Harry said.“You're talking about apparating 400,000km...” Sirius said.“A. It's only 385,000km, secondly it'll only be the once because I'll be putting up a portal.” Harry said.“And what if you fall short and end up floating in space?” Sirius asked.“Then I'll just keep on apparating until I get there.” Harry said, rolling his eyes.“And the radiation issue?” Sirius asked.“Remember the lead coating on the Kashmir?” Harry asked, fiddling with a small stone shaped like a trapezoid.“I meant to ask you about that. How can that thing even stay up when it's covered in lead?” Sirius asked. Harry looked at him like he was an idiot.“What?” Sirius asked. Harry sighed and took Sirius' hand, patting it.“I didn't want to be the one that had to tell you about this... See there's this thing called magic...” Harry said. Sirius rolled his eyes.“Physics can suck it. I got enough lead on that bitch to protect me from a gamma ray burst. No need to worry about my future progeny.” Harry said. Integra and Seras walked into the room, Integra was blushing, then looked at Harry. Seras giggled and lead Integra down the hall and into the portal room.“That doesn't bode well.” Sirius said. Harry shrugged.“I trust them.” Harry said, before tossing the stone at Sirius, who caught it.“What's this?” Sirius asked. Harry answered by withdrawing a pistol from his coat and firing at his chest point-blank. Sirius stared at him dumbfounded, looking down and patting his chest.“Harry did you just make a bulletproof rune stone?” Sirius asked.“Yeah-huh!” Harry said enthusiastically.“Harry.... did you just shoot at me?” Sirius asked. Harry grinned.
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“You think he'll mind us just dropping in on him like this?” Remus asked. Tonks laughed.“He told us, and I quote, 'Come over any time!'” Tonks said, holding Teddy on her hip. Just then the door burst open and Harry ran out with bright purple hair and several burn marks on his jacket, laughing his head off as Sirius chased him, firing hexes at him.“'Morning, Mr. and Mrs. Lupin!” Harry shouted as he ran by.“MOONEY GRAB HIM!” Sirius cried. On reflex Remus jumped out and grabbed ahold of Harry who started flailing wildly.“Rictusempra!” Sirius shouted. Unfortunately at that very moment Harry slipped out of his grasp and Lupin fell to the ground laughing. Harry leapt over to Tonks and held his arms out, Tonks laughed and handed Teddy to him.“Hey Teddy! Ever been a human shield before?” Harry asked. Teddy laughed and turned his hair purple.“No fair...” Sirius said.“What are you on about, Padfoot?” Tonks asked.“Harry shot me!” Sirius said.“I shot AT you, and I provided you with protection beforehand.” Harry protested.“You didn't even warn me!” Sirius whined.“You apparently never listened to professor Moody. CONSTANT VIGILANCE!” Harry shouted.“Constan viilance!” Teddy imitated.“See, Teddy gets it!” Harry said.“You're a horrible godson...” Sirius said.“And you've been a horrible influence.” Harry said, leading them all back into the manor.“How are the girls doing?” Tonks said.“Good! I had to make Nicole another new bracelet.” Harry said.“Are they with their mothers?” Lupin asked.“No, the Elves are playing with them.” Harry said, leading them up to the nursery. Nicole was giggling while Ascott put on a sock puppet show for her, Harry looked on fondly. Tonks' eyes widened.“Are those...?” Tonks asked. Harry nodded.“Dobby's socks. I couldn't think of a better use for them. I think he'd have probably done the same.” Harry said, wistfully.“I miss that creepy little bugger.” Sirius said with a grin.“Draco actually put up ten thousand galleons to start a foundation to help re-home orphaned elves. So many families ended up dying off and leaving their elves without a home. He deeply regretted his family's treatment of him, I mean it makes sense, Dobby was there for most of his childhood, for better or worse.” Harry said.“I can't believe my cousin is becoming a decent person.” Tonks said.“I wouldn't go that far.” Harry said with a grin

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AN: I might lose a few readers with this one. Nothing requiring a content warning, but yeah. If you don't like it, then I hope you can find comfort in the words of the sixteenth president of the United States, Abraham Lincoln, when presented with complaints about where he'd tied his horse up when attending a friend's wedding: "Tough titties, bitch."
Chapter 7
“This is amazing... where did you find out about this place?” Integra asked.“Imogene told me about it. Apparently when she was in med school she and her friends used to eat here all the time.” Harry said, spearing a bit of asparagus and eating it.“Speaking of Imogene, does she know what's going on in Austria?” Integra asked. Harry shook his head.“No, but the magical world is not taking it seriously at all. I've been working with her on it though. Thankfully we won't have the apparition problem since I'm one of very few people that can apparate over the English channel.” Harry said.“Apparition problem?” Integra asked, before taking a sip of her wine. Harry nodded.“We're working on ways of isolating hot spots if it becomes a pandemic. Tony and I are funneling all immigrants and visitors through screening stations already. Since we don't have a land border we don't have to worry about people apparating over the channel and bypassing screening. It's too far for most folks. I've got a really bad feeling about it though.” Harry said, looking off in the distance.“You're on first name basis with the Prime Minister?” Integra asked. Harry nodded.“The Queen asked me to call her Elizabeth, but I can't really bring myself to.” Harry said with a grin.“Wow. My best friend is becoming such a famous man.” Integra said with a grin. Harry smiled and took her hand, squeezing it.“When you asked me to use your name, it was a far higher honor.” Harry said. Integra blushed brightly and smiled.
Harry had taken Integra out to dinner, simply because he hadn't had a chance to just spend time with her. That and he could tell that Regina had been keeping her up late at night to feed and it had been wearing on her.“You're too kind.” Integra said. She finished her wine and smiled. Harry paid the bill and lead Integra back out into London.“Well I suppose we should head back.” Integra said.“Seras, Zorin and Rip told me they'd keep an eye on Regina for a few more hours, you know.” Harry said. Integra's expression brightened.“What would you like to do then?” Integra asked.“Well, we could catch a movie, or I could bring you to an arcade. Or... I have the perfect idea!” Harry said.“What?” Integra asked.“Do you trust me?” Harry asked.“Obliviously.” Integra said. Harry grinned and lead her into an alley before taking ahold of her and apparating. She had become accustomed to it at this point, and was barely affected any more. She was however shocked when she saw where they were.“Good morning, Mr. Potter-Victoria!” A teenage girl with an American accent said.“Hey Lisa, how are you?” Harry asked. The girl smiled and removed her gloves.“Great! Is this Seras?” Lisa asked.“No, this is Integra , my best friend.” Harry said.“Pleasure to meet you, ma'am.” The girl said.“The pleasure is mine. Harry where are we?” Integra asked, wiping sweat off her brow.“Texas, in the states. specifically the town of Mesquite. I remembered you said you were into horseback riding as a girl?” Harry asked. Integra's eyes widened and she looked around excitedly.“Yes, though it's been a while.” Integra said. Harry grinned.“Think Mr. Doyle would mind if we took Midnight and Echo out for a ride?” Harry asked. Lisa grinned.“Of course not, you know that.” Lisa said. Harry shrugged.“Still, it's polite to ask. Come on, Integra.” Harry said.“Harry I'm not dressed for horseback riding.” Integra said.“Sure you are.” Harry said.“Harry I'm not.... When did you do that?” Integra asked, looking down and seeing herself wearing riding clothes.“Right after we got here.” Harry grinned.“Bring them back when you're done and I'll bring them back to their stables.” Lisa said.“Thanks!” Harry said. He walked her over to where two horses were standing, both mares, one slightly larger than the other. One was white and the other was brown with white spots.“I take it this is echo?” Integra asked, walking to the smaller white horse.“Nope, that's Midnight. Lisa thought it was funny.” Harry said, finding a pair of saddles and attaching them.
*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*“So Teddy's coming tomorrow for a play date with Nicole?” Zorin asked. Seras nodded.“They absolutely adore each other. It'll be weird in a couple of years when Nicole is basically an adolescent and he'll still be a grade schooler.” Seras said.“Well I mean his dad's a werewolf and his godfather is God Emperor of Magical Britain. Pretty sure Weird is a given in our strange family.” Zorin said with a grin. Rip smiled.“Family.... I never thought I'd have that again.” Zorin said. Rip rested her hand on Zorin's knee and squeezed it.“I'll take this group of weirdos over nazis any day.” Rip said, giggling. Seras laughed.“I'm glad Harry took Integra out today. I wish she'd let him take care of her at night more often.” Seras said. Rip shrugged.“She wants to breastfeed, and I can see her reasoning. When she's an adult there are going to be a lot of times where Regina's out doing her own thing, not needing her any more. She wants to treasure every moment. I feel the same, honestly, but I also know that Harry wants to do it too. I'm sure soon enough though Regina will start sleeping through the night.” Seras said. Rip sighed and put down the newspaper she'd been reading.“You seen the news?” Rip asked, bouncing Regina on her knee while Nicole crawled around on the floor.“Yeah, scary, isn't it? Kinda makes you glad you're a vampire, huh?.” Zorin said.“Harry, Integra and Regina aren't.” Seras said, looking concerned.“I doubt Harry has to worry about it, and I'm sure we can keep Integra and Regina safe.” Rip said. Seras shrugged, not feeling confident. Rip decided to change the subject and distract her.“So I've noticed you and Integra skulking off a lot lately.” Rip said. Seras' eyes widened.“Uh.. yeah...” Seras said.“Spill.” Zorin said with a grin, picking up Nicole when she came over to her.“You need to keep this to yourselves, ok?” Seras said.“Okay...” Rip said.“Seriously, especially don't let Alucard know.” Seras said.“Know what?” Zorin asked. Seras sighed.“I'm trying to set her up with Harry.” Seras said.“WHAT?!?” Zorin and rip both cried at the same time.“Shh keep it down...” Seras said.“Sorry! But seriously, what the fuck?” Zorin asked. Seras paused.“You and Harry aren't splitting up, are you?” Rip asked. Seras shook her head.“No, that's not it at all. It's complicated.” Seras said.“Well we've got plenty of time.” Zorin said.“Integra and I had a conversation last week. She's had a thing for Harry since they met, and it's only gotten worse since. She keeps getting close to getting over him then something happens and she's head over heels again. I offered to help her find someone, but she really has never had eyes for anyone until she met Harry. I even suggested she ask Sirius out, but well...” Seras said.“That would never work out.” Zorin said, laughing.“Yeah.” Seras said grinning.“So what, you guys gonna share him?” Rip asked. Seras's eyes widened.“Um... no. Not exactly.” Seras said.“I don't understand...” Zorin said. Seras blushed.“Integra and I are.. kind of... into each other too.” Seras said. Zorin and Rip looked shocked. Seras looked back and forth between Rip and Zorin, who were not speaking.“Uh Seras?” Zorin asked.“Yeah?” Seras said, visibly anxious.“That's pretty gay....” Zorin said. Rip looked at Zorin, scandalized before she snorted.“What?” Seras asked. Zorin lost her composure and started laughing obnoxiously. Rip followed immediately after.“You guys are horrible. Nicole don't listen to your awful auntie Zorin.” Seras said, unable to stop herself from joining in.
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“I had a wonderful time, Harry.” integra said, holding Harry's hand as they approached the entrance to his Manor.“Me too. Texas is a bit hot for my tastes, though.” Harry said. They opened the door and walked through. Harry paused when he saw three women, two of which were carrying babies all looking at him.“Uh.... hi?” Harry asked. Seras looked decidedly guilty and Zorin and Rip were wearing shit-eating grins. He looked over at Integra who was blushing wildly and not meeting his gaze.“What's this all about?” Harry asked, looking back at Zorin Rip and Seras.“Um...” Seras said. He looked back at Integra who suddenly looked extremely nervous. Harry smiled and hugged her.“You guys will tell me when you're ready.” Harry said, before walking forward, taking Regina and Nicole and starting up the stairs with them.“Jesus...” Zorin said.“He trusts us...” Rip said. Integra smirked.“Shame we're planning on plotting against him.” Integra said.

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Chapter 8
“I think this is the place...” Sirius said, looking down at the hastily scrawled directions he'd been handed. He walked up and knocked on the door, and was greeted by a kindly older woman wearing an apron covered in flour.“Ah, you must be Mr. Black correct?”“Yes ma'am. Are you Mrs. Inman?” Sirius asked.“That's me! Come on in dear.” She said, inviting Sirius inside. Sirius grinned when he realized that the air was heavy with the scent of baked goods.“Looking to make a good impression, are we?” Sirius asked. Mrs. Inman laughed.“No comment!” Mrs. Inman said with a grin, leading Sirius into her surprisingly spacious kitchen.“So you're aware of the secret, right?” Sirius said. She nodded.“My Granddaughter, Aubrey, just started at Hogwarts this year.” She said, opening her oven and withdrawing a tray of fresh baked chocolate chip cookies.“We need to let these cool.” Mrs. Inman said. Sirius cleared off space on a on a table near an open window and she placed them there.“So do you have lots of experience with kids?” Sirius asked. She nodded.“I was a dinner lady at The London Oratory School for twenty years.” She said.“I read that. How comfortable are you with older kids though?” Sirius asked.“Well I mostly fed younger children at the school but my home has played host to dozens of grandchildren and their friends. Abby is currently my youngest.” Mrs. Inman said. They spoke for around a half an hour about her experience. Sirius was pleased to find out she had current CPR certification, and her references had given her glowing reviews.“Here, this should have cooled enough.” Mrs. Inman said, handing him a still warm cookie. He took a bite and his eyes widened.“Mehef caaa ooo arh?” Sirius said, his mouth full as he jammed the rest of the cookie into his mouth like a barbarian.“What was that, dear?” She asked, clearly struggling not to chastise him for speaking with his mouth full.“When can you start?” He repeated after swallowing.“Are you serious?” She asked.“Yes, are you Mrs. Inman?” Sirius said, subconsciously ducking to avoid a flying hand he'd forgotten wasn't there.“Are you ok?” She asked.“Well not according to my godson and his fiancee...” Sirius grumbled.“However yes I am indeed serious. Honestly the resume and your references were more than enough. These cookies have me considering propositioning you for marriage....” Serious said, gazing longingly at the pan. She laughed and loaded the remaining cookies into a disposable container before handing them to him.“I think I'm a bit old for you, but I'll take the job.” She said.“Wonderful! I'll bring you by on Wednesday and introduce you to the rest of the staff.” Sirius said, shaking her hand.“I did have one question. Who was Walburga Black?” Mrs. Inman asked.“She was my mother.” Sirius said evenly.“Was she fond of children?” She asked.“Oh God, no. She hated them.” Sirius said with a grin.“Even you?” She asked, dusting her hands off on her apron“Especially me.” Sirius said.“Then why?” She asked.“My mother was an evil woman. I don't use the term lightly, she quite literally advocated the murder of muggles and muggleborn. The same people that the orphanage caters to. We opened it because the war left a lot of orphans, and until recently Wizarding Britain was awful to everyone except purebloods and halfbloods. I named it after her because she would have hated it.” Sirius said still grinning.“You are a strange one, aren't you?” Mrs. Inman asked.“Oh you have no idea...” Sirius said with a grin.He left with a smile on his face, a new employee, and a container of the best cookies he'd ever eaten, so he was almost caught off guard when noticed a house elf sneaking down an alley carrying a briefcase.“Hmm... This is muggle London.... Why isn't he disillusioned?” Sirius asked to himself. He shrunk the cookies and stuffed them in his pocket while carefully crossing the road and following the Elf. As he got closer he could hear the elf muttering something in in a language he didn't speak. The elf stubbed its toe and started shouting and hopping on one foot, dropping the briefcase. Sirius shifted his position, stepping on an empty lager can, and it was loud enough to give him away. The elf looked up in terror and disappeared, leaving the briefcase behind.“Damn.” Sirius said, cursing himself for his clumsiness. He walked up to the briefcase and examined it.“Hm... no lock... strange...” Sirius said. He placed it on a closed trash can and opened it, unable to get away in time when an acrid gas exploded out of the briefcase, surrounding him in a cloud. He fell to his knees, feeling drowsiness the likes of which he'd never experienced before.“Damnit..... Harry.... I don't wanna go...... to Gringotts.” Sirius stammered before collapsing, unconscious in the alley.

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“Transfiguration is one of my favorite branches of magic. It's ridiculously complicated, there is a very good reason for that, unlike some other types of magic. The incantations are largely irrelevant, think of them like taking notes in shorthand. The key is will. You are bending reality to your will, so you must not only envision the change in an object, but you need to want it to change.” Harry said to a spellbound audience of students. A Hufflepuff raised her hand.“Tamika?” Harry said.“Why do transfigurations always turn back into what they were originally over time?” Tamika asked. Schrodinger looked up, intrigued to see his father's viewpoint on this.“That hasn't been proven, but I have a theory.” Harry said, hopping down off the student's desk he'd dragged to the front of the room. He had a habit of sitting on desks while lecturing, and he didn't dare desecrate Minerva's desk by sitting on it. The woman herself stood, her back against a wall and her arms folded, observing happily.“When you transfigure something, I believe you change only it's form, not it's essence. That would explain why when you change a mouse into a snuffbox, when the transfiguration reverts it is still a living, functioning mouse, and not a twitching pile of gruesome biomass.” Harry said. Harry looked at his watch and sighed.“Alright guys that's time. Remember what I said, you have to want it. Willpower is the key to transfiguration.” Harry said.“Thank you God Emperor Potter-Victoria.” The class all said as one, including Schrodinger. Harry's eyes narrowed.“That sounded suspiciously rehearsed.” Harry said, his gaze turning into a glare as it reached Minerva who was covering her mouth to hide her laughter. The students filed out, barring Schrodinger who went up to hug Harry.“How's it going, kiddo?” Harry asked, ruffling his hair.“It's great. Professor Vector has been letting me attend third year arithmancy classes once a month. It's fascinating...” Schrodinger said.“Don't bog yourself down too much, you're also here to make some friends remember.” Harry said. Schrodinger's expression fell.“That is proving a bit more difficult. Most of my friends are upperclassmen.” Schrodinger said.“I believe Mr. Blitz is a bit more mature than the other first years, it's hard for him to find common ground with them.” Minerva said.“Well don't try to force it. Fake friends are worse than no friends. It'll happen sooner than you think. How's Grawp? Hagrid told me you and he were helping him in the forbidden forest?” Harry asked.“Yeah, the centaurs accidentally knocked down a few more trees than they meant to, expanding their pasture and they offered the extras to Hagrid for firewood He asked us to retrieve the logs. Grawp is great!” Schrodinger said.“Yes, he's great at helping you give me a heart attack.” Minerva said, grumpily.“What happened?” Harry asked. Schrodinger hesitated, looking guilty.“We finished a lot sooner than we thought it would take, so we had some time to kill. I might have dared him to try to throw me over the castle.” Schrodinger said.“Yeah don't do that. Parenting complete. Did it work?” He asked gleefully. Minerva pinched the bridge of her nose and groaned. Schrodinger nodded and smiled.“Almost clipped the Astronomy tower, but yeah I made it!” Schrodinger said.“Awesome!” Harry said, high-fiving him.“You really shouldn't encourage dangerous behavior like that...” Minerva chided. Harry shrugged.“Grawp could have thrown him full-force right into the side of the castle and the only thing it would do is irritate him. He is a vampire, Minerva.” Harry said.“Yes, however the other students that were cheering him on most certainly were not.” Minerva said. Harry's expression fell.“Ah. Good point.” Harry said, carefully considering his next words.“Next time do it at night!” Harry said, leaning forward and stage whispering easily loud enough for Minerva to hear. Schrodinger laughed and Minerva rolled her eyes, and failed to suppress the smile on her face.“How are moms?” Schrodinger asked.“Zorin is very emotional. It's weird with Integra there was lots of angry outbursts, with Seras it was mostly morning sickness. Zorin has been manic and clingy, prepare for lots of that when she comes to visit.” Harry said.“Everyone else?” Schrodinger asked.“I think they're up to something, but aside from that no problems.” Harry said.
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Sirius awoke, a black cloth bag over his head and he groaned, straining against the ropes binding him to a chair.“If you're going to keep doing this Harry, at least be original about it. We did the bag over the head a while ago, remember?” Sirius asked. He frowned when he didn't hear a response.“Hello?” Sirius asked. He was beginning to get concerned. He heard his voice echoing, as though he were indoors. After a few moments he heard muffled footsteps approaching, multiple pairs, as though they were on the other side of a wall. He heard a door open and several people step through it.“Hey Harry? Come on, man take the bag off.” Sirius said. The bag was roughly removed and he squinted, unprepared for the assault of harsh, artificial light that bathed the inside of the room.“What gives, mate?” Sirius asked.“Auf Weidersehen, Herr Black.” The Major said with a sadistic grin.

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Chapter 9
Seras was walking down the hall, having just put Nicole to bed. She smiled at the memory. Nicole had been fussy all morning, despite being fed and clean, and Seras had been at her wit's end. She thought to get Harry, but didn't want to take him away from his work right now, so when she saw Integra with Regina and walked up to her, Nicole immediately calmed, smiling reaching for Regina. Integra and she went to the shared nursery and placed them both together in Nicole's crib, and within moments both were asleep, their fingers intertwined. Integra quietly photographed them before they left.“What's Harry up to today?” Integra asked.“Working with the Infernals. They're digging a system of catacombs underneath Diagon Alley for them. Most are going to want to go back to their world after this is over, but many have expressed an interest in staying, and Harry expects once they wake up the rest there will be more. Underground is ideal since they're so sensitive to sunlight.” Seras said. They walked in silence for a few moments, as time went on it became more unbearable.“Can we talk in the Library?” Seras asked abruptly.“Um... sure.” Integra said, following her towards the enormous Potter library. When they entered Seras closed the door.“You've been very quiet around me.” Seras said. Integra looked at the floor.“I'm sorry. I'm just... This is very new to me.” Integra said. Seras chuckled.“Me too. A couple of years ago if you told me I'd be engaged to a man, a mother to his child, and trying to convince him to include his female best friend in the relationship, I'd have carted you in for drunk and disorderly.” Seras said Integra smirked.“There's also the religious implications.” Integra said.“Oh that's bollocks and you know it.” Seras said. Integra looked at her scandalized.“Integra, I've had these feelings for quite a while. Hell I've borne a child out of wedlock and I'm a vampire. Do you remember what happened when Harry demonstrated holy magic on me?” Seras asked. Integra said nothing so she continued.“I didn't burn to a crisp. I felt warm, loved, like Harry was pouring his soul into me. Holy magic harms evil, Integra.” Seras said. Integra looked pensive.“I hadn't thought of that.” Integra said. Seras closed the distance and hugged her.“It's going to be okay, Integra. Look, why don't we drop the girls off with Rip and Zorin, ask the elves to make something nice and all three of us have dinner and discuss it.” Seras said, having backed off a bit but still holding her.“Oh I don't know if I'm quite ready yet..” Integra said. Seras looked her in the eye.“Tonight, Integra. We're doing it tonight.” Seras said, authoritatively.“Okay....” Integra said. Seras grinned and kissed her cheek.“No real kisses until Harry's in on it.” Seras said with a smirk. Integra laughed.
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“You guys sure this is gonna be ok?” Harry asked, carving runes into the wooden supports holding the new tunnel up.“Oh yeah. Back home we were living in caves anyway, hot, dry caves. This place is paradise in comparison.” Voorg said, wiping his brow.“Remember the storefront windows up above all have UV shielding now.” Harry said. Voorg shrugged.“A lot of folks weren't too pleased to see us walking about. Can't say I blame 'em, honestly.” Voorg said.“I sure as hell can.” Harry said, scowling. Voorg patted his shoulder.“Baby steps, mate.” Voorg said. Harry nodded.“I heard Rakka made a new friend.” Harry said. Voorg grinned.“Thaelynn is a bright one. I caught the two of them asleep in the engine room two days ago, apparently they'd stayed up talking shop all night and passed out.” Voorg said.“I remember Rakka was excited about the submarines.” Harry said. Voorg nodded.“That reminds me. We need to discuss drainage in these tunnels.” Voorg said.“Already covered.” Harry said, shining the lumos on his wand downwards. On both sides of the tunnel were grooves about 10 cm deep cut into the floor.“Nice.” Voorg said. Harry frowned.“What's up boss?” Voorg asked.“I just got a bad feeling.” Harry said.“Oh shit.” Voorg said, his expression serious.“Call me if you need me.” Harry said.“Will do. Stay safe.” Voorg said. Harry disapparated, leaving Voorg to continue overseeing construction. Harry appeared in an alleyway between two old businesses in London and stepped out into the street, past the muggle-repelling wards of the commonly used apparition point. He walked on autopilot towards Grimmauld place, and knocked on the door to number 12.The door almost immediately burst open, and Harry was met with the sight of Remus and Tonks looking concerned.“Oh, Harry. Come in we need to talk.” Remus said. Harry entered and followed them to their sitting room.“Sirius has been gone since yesterday. He went to interview Mrs. Inman about the job at the orphanage, and he never came back.” Remus said. Harry grimaced.“I had a feeling something was up. Did you go to Mrs. Inman's address?” Harry asked.“I was about to. Sometimes Sirius will meet someone and disappear for the night without telling us but he always sends a patronus the morning after, usually to brag.” Remus said.“Let's go, I'll need your nose.” Harry said.“Teddy's with mom, I'm coming along.” Tonks said. Remus apparated them to point near the address
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“He won't hold out too much longer. We know from experience these wizards can't stand up to too much punishment.” The Doktor said as he strode down the hall beside the Major.“I'm not worried in the slightest. Soon enough we'll know everything we need to proceed.” The Major said. They turned down a corner and the Major frowned.“Why is the door to his cell open?” The Major asked. “Scheiße” The Doktor said. They picked up the pace, making their way to the cell only to discover that the only occupant was a headless vampire that was rapidly turning to ash.“I'm so sorry, Major.” The Doktor said.“Think nothing of it, Doktor. He can't have gone far.” The Major said. They walked off to go order a search party, not noticing that Sirius was crawling overhead in an air duct with his wand in his teeth. He'd tried to apparate out but the wizards had set up anti-apparition wards, and his emergency portkey was in his jacket which they'd confiscated. In their hubris they'd failed to frisk him, and did not find his backup wand.He was about to climb down when he heard two men speaking.“These nazis are idiots, they didn't even think to search for a spare wand.” One of them said.“I know, right? Fuckin' brainless they are. No wonder they lost the war.” The other said. Neither of them heard the man in the ducts climb silently down and transform into a dog.Sirius stayed low to the ground, blending in perfectly with the shadows, stalking them. When they turned into a room, Sirius followed them in and kicked the door closed with his hind foot. The noise got their attention, but they were too slow to react before Sirius was on one of them ripping out his throat.“Fuck, he's escaped!” The other one said, fumbling for his wand. He managed to pull it out of his sleeve and aim it just in time for Sirius to give a repeat performance, ripping his throat out as well, letting them both bleed out. He looked around and noticed there was a hatch on the opposite wall. He opened it and grinned when he saw daylight coming through the enormous windows on the bridge of the gondola.There were three vampires manning the systems, however behind them was the Captain's chair. Piles of documents lay on a table to the left of it and hanging off the back was his own jacket. He silenced his footsteps. He slowly, carefully made his way to the chair and retrieved his jacket, putting it on and then taking the documents which he silently shrunk and stuffed into the jacket.“Hey mate you got a light?” Sirius asked. The three vampires turned immediately, staring wide-eyed at him.“No worries, I found mine.” Sirius said jabbing his wand and unleashing a gout of flame at them, setting them ablaze. They were still writhing and screaming when he broke through the windows with a bombarda and leapt out the window, going into free fall over the Atlantic ocean.“Genius, Padfoot. Genius.” He said to himself with a grin. After falling a few dozen feet, he felt the wards disappear and he apparated.
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“The scent disappeared in the alley, so they must have apparated.” Remus said.“That was definitely some kind of gas bomb.” Harry said, his eyes stormy as they approached the entrance to 12 Grimmauld place. Tonks had gone to retrieve Teddy, and Remus sighed, opening his liquor cabinet and retrieving a bottle of gin and two glasses.“You need to stay here in case he comes back in some sort of stupor. I've got eyes all over the globe. We'll find him Mooney.” Harry said, reassuring him.“I can't lose him again, Harry.” Remus said“I know.. Neither can I.” Harry said. With a flash of green light, Tonks stepped through the floo with Teddy and walked over to the two of them.“We lost his scent in an alley.” Remus said.“Oh no...” Tonks said.“We'll find him. Amelia already has aurors looking for him, and Tony's passed his description along to the muggle authorities.” Harry said.“If he got drunk and shacked up with some bird I'm going to murder him.” Tonks said. Harry went to respond when he was interrupted by the sound of a loud crash and furniture breaking. They all ran into the parlor and found Sirius laying face down in the remnants of what used to be a couch.“Sirius!” Harry cried, running over.“Hey Harry.” Sirius said with a stupid grin, slowly getting to his feet.“Where were you?” Mooney asked. Sirius reached into his jacket and removed the container of cookies, restoring them to their original size, opening it and taking out a cookie, eating it.“Got some cookies.” Sirius said, handing the container to a dumbstruck Tonks.“Are you ok?” Tonks asked.“Probably not.” Sirius said before collapsing onto the floor, unconscious.

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Chapter 10
“Is he ok?” Harry asked.“He has a slight concussion, and his fingers have been broken. Aside from that he's in reasonable shape for someone who spent two decades either in Azkaban or dead.” Poppy said. Sirius stirred and opened his eyes.“Where am I?” Sirius asked.“Hogwarts Infirmary.” Harry explained.“You know St. Mungo's would have worked, right? This is a school, Harry.” Sirius said with a grin.“Correction. This is my school.” Harry said laughing.“Why is it always you or someone associated with you?” Poppy said as she ran her wand over Sirius' head.“He'll be fine, he just needs rest.” Poppy said.“Thank Merlin. What happened, Sirius?” Harry asked.“Got gassed, woke up in the zeppelin, nazis worked me over a bit.” Sirius said. Harry growled.“Easy, mate. I had much worse during the wars and in Azkaban. The idiots took my jacket with my wand in it but they didn't frisk me, so I still had my spare on me. I freed one of my hands, got my wand and boom I was free.” Sirius said.“What then?” Harry asked.“I escaped through some sweet mission impossible shit, killed some jerks, stole these, broke their windshield and jumped.” Sirius said, reaching into his jacket and withdrawing the container of cookies.“Oh wait...” Sirius said, reaching back in and producing the documents, handing them to Harry. Harry started leafing through the documents quickly, smiling maniacally as he saw blueprints for their zeppelins, maps of locations all over Western Russia and a sealed envelope. He went to open the envelope but stopped when he heard Sirius eating.“Padfoot?” Harry asked.“Wha?” Sirius said, chewing on a cookie.“Where'd you get those?” Harry asked. Sirius swallowed.“Mrs. Inman.” Sirius said.“Gimme one.” Harry said. Sirius swung the container behind him.“Get your own!” Sirius cried.“GIMME A GODDAMN COOKIE!” Harry yelled, pulling out The Elder wand.“Alright you're done.” Poppy said, physically turning Harry around and marching him out the door.“I'll get you for this!” Harry shouted as he was marched out the door. Sirius smiled and waved, while chewing on another cookie.
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Harry adjusted his tie and looked himself over in the mirror. His hair had thankfully returned to its normal state. He looked down and tugged on his cuff links, nodding to his reflection before turning and walking through the door. He took one step down the stairs and nearly missed the second, grabbing the railing at the last minute to steady himself. Standing by the doorway was Seras and Integra, dressed like goddesses. He had no issues ogling his fiancee, however he found himself struggling not to stare at Integra.“Jesus...” Harry said. Seras grinned and Integra blushed and smiled shyly at him.“You're both absolutely stunning.” Harry said making his way down the stairs, first taking Seras' hand and kissing her knuckles before repeating the process with Integra.“You look amazing, Harry.” Seras said.“I mean you're both normally beautiful, but holy fuck you're hot.” Harry said. Seras and Integra both laughed. Harry offered them his elbows, which they took as he apparated. They arrived in the designated apparition room hidden at the back of a restaurant owned by one of the many squibs that Harry brought back into the magical world by not being a dick to them. They stepped into the hallway and made their way to the entrance where they were intercepted by a waiter and walked to their seats.“Can you recommend a wine, Integra? I'm still a bit inept at choosing them.” Harry asked.“Sure, hand me the wine list.” Integra said.“I can't get over how amazing you both look tonight. I don't mean to harp on it, but....goddamn.” Harry said. Seras rolled her eyes but Integra blushed scarlet, hiding behind the wine list.“I'm thinking smoked salmon.” Harry said.“I'll have the lobster bisque, it's easy to mix blood into.” Seras said.“That actually sounds rather nice. Since we're having seafood, I'd recommend a the Riesling.” Integra said.“Sounds good.” Harry said. After the waiter came and took their order, Seras leaned forward and whispered to Harry.“Can you silence the booth?” Seras asked. Harry looked confused but nodded and snapped his fingers.“That works?” Integra asked.“I've been practicing.” Harry said with a grin.“Of course you have.” Seras said, chuckling.“Is something wrong?” Harry asked.“Nothing is wrong, but we have something serious to talk to you about.” Seras said. Integra was twisting her napkin. Harry frowned.“Everyone's ok, right?” Harry asked.“HarryIwanttojoinyourrelationshipwithSeras!” Integra blurted out, covering her mouth in shock. Harry froze.“Wow.. I was going to ease into it, but ok.” Seras said, grinning. Harry looked at her.“You knew?” Harry asked, his tone completely neutral. Seras' expression fell.“We've been discussing it for a little while now.” Seras said. Harry looked over at Integra who looked to be on the verge of tears. He smiled kindly and reached across the table, taking her hands.“I'm overwhelmed, Integra, not upset.” Harry said. Integra slumped slightly, the tension leaving her body.“It was my idea, Harry. Integra and I spend a lot of time together, and for a while now I've been trying to ignore the fact that I have feelings for her too.” Seras said. The waiter arrived with their wine and poured it into their glasses.“Leave the bottle, please” Harry said. The waiter nodded and left. Integra drained her glass and Harry smirked.“I um.. I feel the same, actually.” Integra admitted. Harry sat back in his seat and looked pensive.“Harry, you're being awfully quiet....” Seras said, doubt creeping into her voice.“Big decision, love. Careful consideration.” Harry said, smiling at her. Seras nodded, and Integra sighed.“I don't want to stand between you two.” Integra said.“I know you never would.” Harry said. He sighed, tapping his fingers on the table.“It's rare that my life offers me a situation that seems too good to be true.” Harry said, sipping his wine.“You mean the world to me, Integra, and not just because you're the mother of my first born. You've been my best friend since shortly after I met you.” Harry said, before looking at Seras.“You're my life, my everything, Seras.” Harry said. Integra stood and went to leave, but Harry's hand shot out and gently grasped hers.“Please, Integra. Stay.” Harry asked. She looked down at him, dejected, with tears in her eyes but acquiesced.“I don't know if we can make this work... But I'd like to try.” Harry said. Seras smiled, wiping the tears out of her eyes, Integra looked at him in shock.“H-Harry?” Integra said. Harry smiled at her.“I'd be lost without either of you. You're both so amazing, so beautiful. I am not worthy of either of you, but I'm willing to see if some day I can be.” Harry said, taking Integra's hands, and standing, drawing her up with him. He looked over at Seras who smiled and nodded at him. Harry turned to Integra and brushed her hair away form her eyes before pulling her in for a kiss. Seras squealed happily.

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Alucard froze in mid-stride, causing Pip to bump into the back of him, on their way to the Hellsing family library.“C'est quoi ce bordel?” Pip said. He walked around Alucard, turning to face him. He wore an expression of disbelief.“Alucard?” Pip asked. Alucard said nothing, but closed his eyes.“You alright zere?” Pip asked. A moment later Alucard's eyes opened and he smiled. Pip was terrified. This wasn't Alucard's savage, murderous grin nor was it the mischievous one that horrified him every time he saw it. Alucard was wearing an expression of sincere, true happiness.“Shit...” Pip said.
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“I'm not ready to take this any further right now, but would it be alright if I stayed at your manor tonight?” Integra asked Seras and Harry.“Your inclusion in our relationship does not countermand your standing invitation to occupy our residence.” Harry said with a grin.“Stop trying to sound smart, Harry.” Seras said, nudging him. Integra laughed. They walked up the stairs, hand in hand in hand, until they stood outside of Integra's bedroom. Integra stopped and turned, looking at them.“I don't want tonight to end...” Integra said.“Tomorrow cannot come, if tonight never ends.” Harry said with a watery smile.“That was really cheesy.” Seras said, grinning. Harry laughed.“I just spent the evening with the two most beautiful women on the planet, forgive me for being a bit sappy.” Harry said.“Tonight... Barring the birth of our daughters.... tonight was the best night of my life.” Integra said, Harry smiled and wiped at his eyes.“Goodnight Integra.” Seras said, stepping forward and sharing their first real kiss.“Hot.....” Harry said, dodging Integra's attempt at smacking him. Seras smiled into the kiss, before breaking it off and caressing her face.“I can't wait until tomorrow.” Seras said. Harry stepped and kissed her as well.

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Chapter 11
Integra was dragged out of a rather pleasant dream by the sound of Regina crying.“Mama's coming, dear.” Integra said. She stood, putting her slippers on and glided, feeling weightless, on her way to the crib. She smiled and reached down to pick Regina up, then sat in her rocking chair next to it and fed her. She heard a knock on the door.“Who is it?” She asked.“Seras!” Seras said.“Come in!” Integra said. The door opened and Seras came in, carrying Nicole.“Hey you.” Seras said with a bright smile.“Hi. Last night was amazing.” Integra said.“It was, wasn't it? I told you you had nothing to worry about.” Seras said, pulling up another chair and settling across from her.“I briefly thought it was just a wonderful dream. I can't tell you how grateful I am that you're willing to include me.” Integra said.“It wasn't a difficult decision for me. You're amazing, Integra.” Seras said.“Harry worried me a bit, I couldn't read him after I blurted it out like a moron.” Integra said.“Hush, Integra. Nobody gets to call you names, especially you.” Seras said. Integra nodded.“Besides, Harry doesn't rush into any decision, even ones he's confident about, without giving it thought. You mean the world to him, Integra.” Seras said.“I know, and you both mean the world to me. I just have no experience with this.” Integra said.“Neither did I when I met Harry. He makes it really easy to learn.” Seras said grinning.“When did you discover you were attracted to women too?” Integra asked. Seras laughed.“I don't know, how long have I know you?” Seras said. Integra's eyes widened.“Seriously?” Integra asked.“I've never encountered a woman that I felt like that about until you. Honestly, I was terrified.” Seras said.“Really?” Integra asked. Seras nodded.“Growing up in a religious orphanage gives you lots of hangups about same-sex relationships. Spending time with Harry and especially meeting Rip and Zorin made me realize it was silly. Love is love, and love is beautiful.” Seras said. Integra's heart swelled.“I've always had a feeling.” Integra said.“Oh?” Seras said. Integra nodded smiling down at Regina and fixing her top. She lifted her to her shoulder and started patting her back.“When I was a girl, away at boarding school. I had a bit of a crush on one of my instructors.” Integra admitted. Regina belched causing the two women to laugh.“She was beautiful. Honestly, she reminded me a lot of you. Bright eyes, cute little nose, she could easily throw me across the room.” Integra said laughing. Seras blushed and smiled.“How'd you find that out?” Seras asked.“She liked to pull the girls aside and speak with them, getting to know them. When it was my turn I told her that I enjoyed fencing. She mentioned she studied jujitsu and I asked for a demonstration. The bruised bum was worth it.” Integra said, laughing.“She was the only teacher there worth a damn. It's a shame her visa expired and she had to get back to Australia.” Integra said.“Is that why you never found someone?” Seras said, bouncing Nicole on her knee, much to the toddler's delight.“No, it was more.. Well you know what I do for a living. By nature I need to be very secretive. I was always afraid to bring someone home and have to explain Alucard to them.” Integra said, before standing and placing Regina in the playpen in the corner of the room. Seras stood and put Nicole there who squealed excitedly when seeing her sister.“It's peculiar, Harry had more reason to be secretive than I, and yet he refused to do so. He was an open book from the beginning, he shared everything, even when it was painful. What's more is he never pried when I was reluctant to share.” Integra said. Then she smiled, pulling Seras into an embrace.“Then there was you. I know I was awful to you at first...” Integra said.“Don't, Integra. We're beyond that now.” Seras said, smiling and leaning her head forward against Integra's.“I've been so restrained my whole life. Withdrawn. I'd put up this impenetrable barrier around me, refusing to let anyone in. Plenty had tried, mind you. The other Knights, Walter, even Pip though he was always respectful... You and Harry on the other hand... I don't want to be shielded from you any more. I want to let you in. You make me feel safe.” Integra said, her lower lip quivering.“I'm glad.” Seras said before capturing her lips with her own.*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*
“Are you sure about this, Harry?” Zorin asked. Harry grinned.“Absolutely.” Harry said.“But what about Ron? Even Neville?” Zorin asked.“Well Ron refused, he's worried I'll make him wear a dress...” Harry said, causing Zorin to laugh.“Neville understands why I'm asking you. He's fine being a groomsman.” Harry said.“Do it, Zorin. Come on.” Rip said.“But Schrodinger?” Zorin said.“Ring bearer!” Schrodinger announced. Zorin smiled, scrubbing her eyes.“I'd be honored to be your best woman.” Zorin said.“Awesome!” Harry said, hugging her.“I suppose this means I'll need a tuxedo...” Zorin said.“Oh, no you don't. I'm told you look stunning in the bridesmaid's dress.” Harry said.“Of that I can definitely assure you.” Rip said leering at Zorin who blushed.“So how's the honeymoon going to work now that you've brought Integra into the relationship?” Zorin asked, blatantly changing the subject.“Well I won't go into details, but she's coming with.” Harry said.“I'm sure she is....” Rip said with a salacious grin. Harry clamped his hands over Schrodinger's ears.“Don't corrupt my precious baby boy!” Harry shouted in mock outrage.“You know I can hear easily through your hands, right dad?” Schrodinger said.“No you can't.” Harry said with a grin. Schrodinger grinned and rolled his eyes. Harry took a deep breath and smiled.“I love autumn.” Harry said. His gaze was diverted behind Schrodinger where Rakka and Thaelynn were approaching across the field. Harry grimaced, apparating over and casting a barrier over Rakka.“You need to be careful, Rakka. Even when it's cloudy you're still in danger.” Harry said.“Yeah yeah, Thaelynn's got some news.” Rakka said.“Oh? Is it the magical cure for demon cancer? Because that's what you're going to need if you keep traipsing around without protection...” Harry said. Rakka looked stunned.“Is demon cancer even a thing?” Thaelynn asked.“Harry, I'm sorry..” Rakka said, looking shocked.“Don't be sorry, Rakka, be careful. I can't stand the idea of you or any of the other Infernals being injured or sick because of me. You're all very important to me and not just because you're helping us in this war. Do you understand?” Harry said.“Y-yeah.. Sorry boss.” Rakka said. Harry smiled and reached his hand out towards the forest, summoning a stick which he transfigured into an over sized parasol, which he handed to her.“This'll do once the barrier fades. Now what was the news?” Harry asked.“The No Quarter has been completed, and is ready for testing.” Thaelynn said quietly.“Excellent! Any trouble with its special features?” Harry asked.“None, though the commander will have to be a magical to use it.” Rakka explained.“Understood. Come, lets go inside to eat, I'm starving. “Harry said, He strode forward leaving them behind as he went to collect the three vampires.“I told you, Rakka.” Thaelynn said with a grin.“I've never... I'm not used to leaders who actually give a shit, you know?” Rakka said, quietly.“Well get used to it. He'll gladly take a bullet or a curse to save even the lowest ranking of us. According to Ascott, he has. Way too many times..” Thaelynn said.They all walked through the gates and into the great hall. There were few students there, however the quiet conversation that had been going on ceased as they walked through.“Ooh, it's been a while since I sat at the Slytherin table.” Harry said with a grin, leading them there.“You get used to the stares.” Harry said, needlessly loudly. Several students looked away, giggling. Harry rolled his eyes.“You sure it's ok for us to be here?” Thaelynn asked, looking around nervously. Harry looked at her curiously before realization dawned.“Holy shit you're the first Dwarf to step foot inside of Hogwarts aren't you?” Harry asked. She nodded nervously.“Well at least until next year.” Harry added.“What?” Thaelynn asked.“There are four Dwarven children enrolled in next year's batch of firsties I think. Couple Goblins too.” Harry said.“Really?” Thaelynn asked excitedly. Harry grinned and nodded.“Reminds me, we're looking for a pair of magical engineering teachers, one Dwarven and one Goblin, you guys tend to run circle wizards in that regard. Can you see if anyone back home is interested?” Harry asked. A House elf appeared with a note pad“Whaddaya want?” The elf asked.“Lovely to see you too, Jerry.” Harry said.“Yeah yeah, now out with it.” Jerry said taking their order. Zorin requested plate of fish and chips and Harry glared at her.“Three plates of fish and chips, please.” Zorin said, sheepishly. Harry nodded.“You got it.” Jerry said, taking the rest of their orders and disappearing.“Zorin, please. If your body is telling you you need to eat, you need to eat. Nobody here is going to judge you. Have you seen how much Thaelynn eats?” Harry asked.“Yeah I'm like a garbage disposal.” Thaelynn said proudly. Zorin shrugged.“Work in progress, Harry.” Rip said, bringing Zorin in for a one-armed hug. Harry noticed there was a discarded issue of today's Prophet so he opened it and frowned.“It's really all over the place now.” Harry said.“What?” Rip asked. Harry showed her the paper.

Medical professionals on both the Magical and Muggle side of things have been reporting more and more cases of the new mystery illness. Emperor Potter-Victoria and Muggle prime minister Tony Blair's mitigation policy has proven fruitful so far, as no cases have been identified in the United Kingodom. Experts suggest that it is a matter of time and have been distributing information on how to avoid spreading this and any other illnesses.

Firstly, it is advised that if you feel ill in any way, you should self-isolate and inform those closest to you of your situation. While the illness does not seem to affect birds, it is advised to handle owl-delivered correspondence carefully, making sure to sterilize any mail with magic before opening it. Hand washing is critical, cleaning spells have proven ineffective at preventing the spread of other diseases in the past so it is advised that thorough washing with soap and warm water be done frequently.

Symptoms of this illness include fever, nausea, fatigue, headache and general flu-like symptoms along with an increased appetite. If you are experiencing any or all of these symptoms, please contact the Ministry of Health using the methods listed below, and once again, self-isolate. More information will be published when it is available.

“That's awful...” Rip said. Harry nodded.“It affects muggles and magicals alike. So far it seems to only affect Humans. I had a meeting with imogene and Amelia about this yesterday. Aurors are undergoing specialized training and are being issued protective gear and have been ordered to use bubblehead charms whenever possible. Minerva is running lockdown drills as well, not just for the disease but for Millennium attacks as well.” Harry said.“That sucks.” Zorin said.“Yeah it does.” Harry said.

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Chapter 12
“You invited the Pope?” Alucard asked. Harry grinned,“And the Queen! The Pope, predictably is unable to attend, but he did request pictures.” Harry said, tugging at his sleeves, and adjusting his tri-corner pirate hat.“And Betty?” Alucard asked, looking skeptical. Harry grinned but said nothing. Harry turned his head to the door as he heard a knock.“Are you dressed?” Integra asked. Harry frowned.“Yup!” Harry said. His jaw dropped when he saw her. At the last minute, Harry and Seras decided to adopt a pirate theme for the bridal party, Integra was wearing the chosen bridesmaid dress, however it had been distressed and modified through transfiguration to look more piratey. She looked absolutely stunning.“You all set?” Integra asked.“You're beautiful!” Harry said“I am, aren't I?” Integra said with a smirk. Alucard laughed.“I remember when you were a little girl, pointing a gun at your uncle.” Alucard said.“You made a fairly decent arm rest.” Integra said fondly. She looked up at Harry and smiled.“It's almost time.” Integra said. She made to leave before Harry caught her arm, bringing her in for a kiss. When it broke she smiled and laughed, stumbling backwards a bit before turning and leaving awkwardly with Alucard following behind her. Harry took one last look in the mirror and smiled, wiping Integra's lipstick off his lips. He felt strange, completely at ease. Everyone had warned him of the pre-wedding jitters, but either he was too busy, or on a deep, instinctual level, he understood that this was right. There was no apprehension, no nerves, just peace, and excitement. He ducked his head under the doorway to avoid the ridiculous hat he had on being knocked off, and made his way down the Hogwarts hallway.A first year Hufflepuff girl came running down the hall, skidding to a stop right in front of him.“Yarr?” Harry asked. The Hufflepuff laughed,.“They're ready for you.” She said.“Yarr!” Harry said with a nod. The girl took his hand and lead him the rest of the way through the corridor, and through the great hall, pausing at the door. Shortly after an ethereal dog bounded into the room, and sat in front of Harry.“Th-they're r-ready for you....” Sirius' patronus said, his voice broken.“Oh lord he's already crying.” Harry said.“What a bitch!” The Hufflepuff said.“Five points to Hufflepuff!” Harry said with a grin, high-fiving the firstie. He waved his hand, opening the doors and walked through, following a marked path down to the grounds where he assumed his position at the altar, smiling at an openly weeping Minerva and Hagrid. Harry struggled not to laugh as he took in the costumes everyone was wearing.Minerva was wearing a red starfleet uniform from Star Trek, the original series, and had a transfigured tricorder attached to her belt. Hagrid was wearing an admittedly awful, homemade dragon costume. Sirius was wearing stereotypical prisoner garb, including a plastic ball and chain. Remus was dressed as werewolf, but only because Tonks had wanted to go as Little Red Riding Hood. Teddy, was of course was dressed as the huntsman.He couldn't quite figure out Alucard's costume, he was wearing a red and white checkered dress with matching bonnet, pigtails, combat boots and he was wearing a penguin puppet on one hand, grinning like a madman. His groomsmen, Ron, Fred and George Weasley, Pip, and Neville were all wearing matching pirate crew uniforms, except Zorin who was also wearing a modified bridesmaid dress, standing in the best woman position.Harry looked over at the bridesmaids, with Integra in the maid of honor position and smiled at her, Rip, Hermione, Heinkel, Yumie, Luna and Helena. Harry admitted that Rip and Zorin made exceptional pirate wenches. To nearly everyone's utter shock, Anderson stood in priest vestments at the altar, having been asked to officiate. Harry smirked when he remembered Minerva's face when he'd asked Anderson to help translate when Minerva became 'all emotional and Scottish.'His heart leapt when he heard professor Flitwick tap his baton against his sheet music stand, and the band comprised of Hogwarts students started playing the wedding march. Andromeda and Narcissa, holding Regina and Nicole walked down first, throwing flower petals on the aisle, followed by an ecstatic looking Schrodinger who was dressed as Link from the Legend of Zelda. Harry stared in awe at the vision of beauty that approached behind them, her hands grasping the absurdly dressed Alucard's elbow.Seras arrived just as the song was ending, and with a smile he took Harry's hand, and placed it in Seras', before stepping back and assuming his position. Harry's mind was blank, Seras was to him already one of the two most beautiful women in the world, but dressed as she was, she was like a living goddess. Her dress was lavish, tastefully cut and made of the finest silks they could get their hands on. She wore an ornate, bejeweled, goblin-made platinum tiara which had been gifted permanently to the Potter-Victoria family, in an almost unprecedented show of respect and friendship from the Goblin Nation.“Jesus fuck you're hot.” Harry said, causing those in attendance to laugh. Harry winced when he was smacked in the head with a rolled up copy of their wedding vows that Anderson had been given.“Lord's fuckin' name.” He said with a grin. Harry laughed along with everyone else in attendance. He looked over again at Seras and smiled, meeting her watery gaze with his own.“Dearly beloved, we're gathered here today in the sight of God to join this monstrous abomination and this Godless heathen in unholy matrimony.” Anderson said, causing the crowd to gasp in outrage.“How dare he...” Emma Granger whispered to Amelia bones who was sitting next to her. “Look at them.” Amelia whispered. Harry and Seras were laughing and Anderson was looking fondly at them.“I have it on good authority, that Alucard helped them with that.” A muffled female voice said from behind them. Amelia looked back and saw a short, older woman dressed as a fighter pilot.“You know them?” Amelia asked. When the woman lifted the visor to her helmet and winked, Emma paled.Meanwhile on the groom's side of the aisle, Remus was a consoling a sobbing Sirius while rolling his eyes.“Get yourself together, man, you're going to miss the best part.” Remus said, rolling his eyes.“I'm just so happy!” Sirius said. Tonks smacked him on the back of the head and shushed him.Schrodinger stood there, his heart bursting with joy as he watched two of his parents get married. He reflected on the fact that not too long ago, he was little more than the pet of a megalomaniacal fascist, destined to die bringing down a monster. Now, however, he was loved and cherished, and adored by an enormous and diverse family of people, many of whom used to be his enemies. He found himself retreating into non-existence less and less as time went on and it was all thanks to the wonderful people who had welcomed him into their lives with open arms.He saw his cue and approached Anderson, holding a satin pillow with their wedding rings on it out. Harry took Seras' and placed it on her finger, then Seras did the same for Harry. They clasped their hands together and Anderson produced a strip of blue cloth, wrapping it around their hands.“Before we met, I had no purpose. Life was dull, dark, dreary. I was going through the motions, drifting aimlessly, hoping that some day I'd find meaning. Then I met you. You opened my eyes and my heart. When I was turned I thought I'd never find love, yet you proved me wrong. My life with you is a dazzling adventure and I can't wait to see where it takes us next. I love you, Harry Potter-Victoria and I promise to until my dying breath.” Seras said, her eyes shining.“You saved me, Seras. During the war I had purpose, but no drive. I just lived each day wanting nothing more than to get it over with. Each completed task was simply the first step in the next. After the war, I had nothing. I helped rebuild, I raised money for charitable causes, I fought for the rights of magical beings and halfbloods and muggleborns, all worthy causes yet they did little for me. Then I was an auror, and then a hit wizard, searching for something I couldn't identify. Something I had as a kid, a purpose. Something worth dying for.Then I met you. You gave me something worth living for. You gave me my new friends, my new life. You are my everything. I cannot quantify how much you've done for me, and it seems a pittance in comparison, but all I can offer you is my undying love, which I do freely. I love you Seras Victoria, and I will for the rest of my days.” Harry said. Seras smiled, crying unabashedly.“Potter-Victoria.” She corrected with a grin.“Do you, Seras Victoria-soon to be Potter-Victoria take this man as your lawfully wedded husband?” Anderson asked. She laughed.“I do.” Seras said.“And do you, Harry, still gonna be Potter-Victoria take this woman to be your lawfuly wedded wife?” Anderson asked.“I do.” Harry said. Anderson tied a knot with the cloth ribbon under where their hands were clasped.“If any here see any reason that these two should not be wed, hold your bloody tongues. I now pronounce you, husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.” Anderson said. Seras and Harry kissed, and the crowd all cheered in jubilation, none louder than Integra and Schrodinger who both looked nearly deliriously happy. After a few moments the cheering abated and their kiss broke, and without warning a noise resembling an exploding trumpet blasted out in the back as Hagrid loudly blew his nose on a handkerchief the size of a table cloth.Harry and Seras carefully pulled their hands out of the tied cloth, preserving it as best they could and made their way, hand in hand through a crowd of guests towards the area they'd set up down by the lake for the reception. The elves had, as they always did, gone overboard, and were reduced to jibbering, emotional wrecks when Harry insisted on shaking their hands and thanking them. Harry looked around and frowned.“Where's Integra?” Harry asked. Seras looked around and frowned, spotting her standing off to the side with the other guests.“Why is she all the way over there?” Seras asked, pointing in the direction.“One sec.” Harry said, disapparating.Integra smiled, watching Harry and Seras, she could almost feel the happiness radiating off of them. She was overjoyed for her two lovers, but had resolved herself to keep a respectful distance during their special day. She realized that their relationship was rather new, but a small part of herself couldn't help but look forward to one day maybe having her turn at the altar. Until then, she would support and admire them from a distance. She nearly leapt out of her skin when she saw Harry disappear only to reappear centimeters in front of her, causing her to toss her wine in the air, drenching them both. Harry laughed, waving his wand to clean it off before taking Integra's hand and leading her towards Seras.“Harry what are you doing?” Integra asked, grinning.“You aren't where you're supposed to be.” Harry said with a smile.“Today is about you and Seras, Harry.” Integra said, just as they got to the table Seras was sitting at.“You're right it is, and it's ours to decide who we share it with.” Harry said, directing Integra to sit on Seras' right, while he sat on her left.“We have a peculiar relationship, Integra, but peculiar is fine. It's wonderful. We want to share every moment of this with you.” Harry said, taking her hand and squeezing it. Integra sniffled.“We need you, Integra. We'll always need you.” Seras said, taking her other. The moment was interrupted by a sobbing Minerva being supported by a grinning Anderson. Minerva looked up and uttered an indecipherable string of what Harry was only partially convinced was English.“She said she's proud of you, and seeing you up there reminded her of when she saw your parents married.” Anderson said. Minerva nodded and said something equally indecipherable.“She said they'd be so proud of the man you've become, and the wonderful women in your life.” Anderson said. Minerva choked back a sob and uttered something else that had Anderson looking confused.“Christ even I didn't get that one.” Anderson said. Harry nearly fell out of his chair laughing at the absurd spectacle of a Scottish woman in her seventies leaping into the air to smack a seven-foot vampire murder machine in the back of the head.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

AN: Sorry for the delay. This chapter has been sitting in my to-do for a month now, but I never got around to re-reading and fixing it. I’ve had a lot on my plate lately, not the least of which is switching from Windows to Linux. That and I haven’t been feeling very inspired lately, so I didn’t want to force it. I have a few good ideas though, so stay tuned.

And to my detractors, not the ones pointing out spelling, punctuation or contunity errors but the ones complaining about where I’m taking this story, I hear and understand your criticisms. I will as always endeavor to improve myself, and your feedback has been invaluable in that pursuit. I feel though that it is somewhat less than constructive. I mean, there’s telling me I forgot I killed off a character, then there’s whining because my characters don’t fit their mental image, or bitching that I’m all opinionated in my author’s notes. If you don’t mind me turning the tables, I’ve got a bit of constructive criticism to offer you:

Eat a five-gallon Home Depot bucket full of dicks.

Chapter 13

“I think this will be the first vacation I've taken since I was a little girl.” Integra said, rolling her suitcase down towards the entryway and settling it next to Seras and Harry's bags.

“Same.” Seras said, looking behind Integra where Harry was nervously speaking to Zorin who was trying her best not to roll her eyes.

“Seriously Zorin. Bad dream, indigestion, mood swing I don't care, you call me, ok?” Harry said.

“Harry I have Rip, Schrodinger, and Pip along with the rest of Hellsing, not to mention all of our magical friends and the Infernals here. On top of that Alucard knows you'd incinerate him if he let anyone harm a hair on my head. You left me a whole case of blood vials. I promise I'll be fine.” Zorin said.

“I just.. I worry. Not only about them, but about you.” Harry said, pointing at Zorin's belly, which had swollen significantly recently.

“It'll be fine, Schrodinger can you talk some sense into your dad, please?” Zorin begged. Schrodinger laughed and hopped down from the bench he had been sitting on.

“Dad, Go. We will call if anything happens that we can't handle easily, ok? Go show Mom and Auntie Integra a good time.” Schrodinger said.

“Alright.. if you're sure...” Harry said.

“Get out of here, you dork!” Zorin said, laughing before hugging him and pulling Schrodinger in.

“Ok, ok. We'll be back in a month. I'll miss all of you.” Harry said.

“We'll miss you guys too.” Schrodinger said. He smiled as he watched Integra and Seras take ahold of Harry as he apparated them away to the French countryside, where Harry had “Rented” a chateau that overlooked the Mediterranean, complete with a private beach, a stable with horses and plenty of land on which to ride them. It also featured a small vineyard. Integra had squealed in delight when she'd found out.

“Ok, Mom. Let's get you back home, shall we?” Schrodinger said, offering her his elbow. She took in and smiled, allowing him to escort her to the Portal room. Just as they were about to enter, they were stopped by Alucard.

“We still on for tomorrow?” Alucard asked.

“Yes, if you're free.” Schrodinger said. Alucard grinned and nodded.

“Best bring your A game, little wizard.” Alucard said, snickering as he walked away. Schrodinger smiled brightly. He'd used the same nickname he'd used for his father.

“What's that about?” Zorin asked. Schrodinger guided her through the portal and to their home.

“Alucard agreed to teach me how to fight with small weapons. Swords, knives, staves and such.” Schrodinger said.

“Oh.. Why?” Zorin asked.

“Magic and superhuman strength and speed are great, but that's no reason to limit myself. If Dad's right, in a couple of months we're in for a big fight. Plus if we’re out in the muggle world and I have to defend myself, or someone else, it’ll be easier to explain away the superhuman strength if I have a weapon.” Schrodinger said. Zorin grimaced. She was thankful that Harry’s estimation of the earliest that the demons would arrive was a month after her due date, but she still hated the idea. She had just found a peaceful, wonderful life, and once again it was threatened.

“Out of curiosity, why didn't you ask Integra?” Zorin asked.

“Well first off her style requires a lot of finesse, and practice. It's something I plan to ask her for after we've beaten Millennium and their Infernal allies. Secondly, Integra is mortal, and if I make a mistake I'd rather it be against someone who can regenerate limbs and happily ignores pain.” Schrodinger said.

“Ah.. Good call. How are you feeling, by the way?” Zorin asked. Schrodinger grimaced.

“Not too much different. It took a moment to get used to being a little taller, but I think it'll be bit before the full effect of it kicks in.” Schrodinger said, and as if to illustrate what they were talking about, his voice cracked and squeaked as he said it. Zorin giggled.

“And then there's that.” Schrodinger said with a grimace.

“Well Harry said that his voice only took a couple of weeks to change. Maybe you'll luck out.” Zorin said.

“Maybe. At least I'm not the only one going through it in my class.” Schrodinger said

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Remus and Tonks sat, slumped back in their chairs looking like death warmed over, while Sirius happily danced around their kitchen brewing their favorite potion.

“Oh Merlin this is the worst hangover ever. Getting old sucks.” Tonks said.

“My heart bleeds.” Remus deadpanned.

“Don't get strung out... by the way I look... don't judge a book by it's covvvvver!” Sirius sang in a shockingly good imitation of Tim Curry.

“Will you stop that! Christ, no more TV for you.” Remus whined.

“Joke's on you I saw it live right after graduation.” Sirius said with a grin, setting two cups full of hangover cure in front of them, which they drained immediately.

“Merlin that tastes worse every time, but it's so worth it.” Tonks said. Sirius laughed.

“So what are you two up to today?” Remus asked, sipping his coffee.

“Amelia asked me to give a talk to the Aurors about conflict de-escalation, Harry sent me to a muggle police seminar last week and it was really enlightening.” Tonks said.

“I'm bringing Imogene to the orphanage to give a few of the kids a checkup.” Sirius said.

“You've really taken to that.” Remus observed. Sirius nodded

“Yeah at first it was almost a joke, just a dig at my mother, but now, especially after talking to Anderson, I think I could really see myself devoting my life to this. Better than rotting away in this sty anyway.” Sirius said.

“I'm proud of you, Sirius.” Remus said seriously.

“Thanks, mate. So... Is Imogene single?” Sirius asked. Remus threw a muffin at him, which he caught and took a bite out of.

“Oi, don't let Harry find out you were about to waste a muffin.” Sirius said.

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“This is bad.” Rip said, sitting at Florean Fortescue's with Luna, pointing at the newspaper spread out In front of them.

“It keeps getting worse.” Still nothing in the UK, but a few people just died from it in Georgia.” Luna said.

“What's going on?” Helena asked, wiping her hands off after she delivered an order to a group of teenagers. Rip handed her the newspaper.

France and Italy have joined the rapidly growing list of European countries closing their borders in response to increased cases of the new epidemic that people are now calling White Lung, due to the white frothy discharge indicative of the disease. Thus far there are no confirmed reports of anyone recovering from the disease, and it is this reporter's sad duty to report that the first deaths have occurred. The bodies are being sent to specialized laboratories in hopes of learning more about the disease and perhaps getting us closer to a cure.

The Muggles have made no headway with the disease, despite their admittedly superior prowess in epidemiology research. Obviously without endangering the Statute, funding has been provided by many magical governments, including and especially Magical Britain routed through Gringotts towards the many research projects their scientists have begun. We will report news as it arrives.

“I really don't like this. My hate for the man aside, I remember my father telling me horror stories of the 1918 Influenza pandemic. That killed fifty million, and there are a lot more people around today.” Rip said.

“It was awful. I was here when it happened, between the flu and the war, people were so scared.” Helena said.

“What can we do to help?” Luna asked.

“Harry's already started.” Rip said, pointing to a poster on the wall explaining the importance of handwashing.

“He and I spoke to a group of vampires who volunteered to help with logistics, given that we can't be infected by mortal diseases. Remus said the werewolves are on board as well, since they seem to be immune.” Rip said.

“How do we know werewolves are immune?” Helena asked.

“We don't for sure, but it's a reasonable bet. A small Russian village with a population of three hundred reported a rate of almost 100%, The five people that weren't infected were Werewolves. Similar situations have been reported all over Eastern Europe. They won't be deployed to assist until they're certain.” Rip explained.

“Oh, and Schrodinger mentioned that all firsties are being taught the bubblehead charm. It's been proven effective against the flu and spattergroit.” Luna added.

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Harry and Seras looked on, smiling, as Integra rushed over to the horses that had been waiting in the stable for them.

“You're too good to us. She's over the moon.” Seras said.

“Yeah.. I wonder how she'll react when she finds out this chateau is hers now.” Harry said with a grin.

“You didn't!” Seras said. Harry laughed and nodded.

“She loved the horses in Texas but neither of us were fond of the weather. France is far more agreeable, plus she has a vineyard to rub in Pip's face.” Harry added.

“Um.. Harry. I have a question.” Seras said, looking nervous.

“Of course.” Harry said, turning to face her.

“It's about Integra.. Um. If she's ready... I'd like her to be with us. You know.. when...” Seras said. Harry grinned.

“When we finally stop living in sin?” Harry asked. Seras smacked him and laughed.

“Yes. I mean... Being married finally, it's a dream come true. I never thought I'd find someone who I'd want to be with, let alone two people. I really want Integra to be a part of all of this.” Seras said.

“I feel the same, but obviously we won't pressure her. She's still a virgin after all, it's a big decision to make.” Harry said. Seras laughed.

“Harry I think she made that decision ages ago.” Seras said. Harry smiled and nodded. Integra walked over with a huge grin on her face.

“Harry this is wonderful! They're so beautiful.” Integra said, gesturing to the Horses.

“You like them do you?” Harry asked. She nodded.

“Cool, because they're yours.” Harry said

“You didn't....” Integra said, shocked.

“I did. The Chateau is yours, though I'd like to borrow it for the month.” Harry said with a laugh.

“Harry... you didn't need to-” Integra said, but Harry cut her off.

“Integra, come with us, please.” Harry said, offering her his hand. She took it, with Seras taking the other as he lead them towards the house.

“I give. It's what I do. Sometimes, it comes back to me in a good way.” Harry said, approaching the front door, which he opened.

“For the moment this home is referred to as “Chateau Hellsing” and can be reached by the floo by that name. A long time ago, it used to have another name. Chateau Delacour.” Harry said.

“Wait.....” Integra said. Harry nodded.

“Fleur's family. During the tournament, I saved Fleur's life twice and Gabrielle's once. During the war, Fleur was a member of the Order and I fought in several battles with her, saving her life at least three more times. Voldemort was sending envoys to a couple of prominent members of the board of governors for Beauxbatons, one of whom was attempting to purchase Gabrielle. I beheaded both of them a few weeks after the battle of Hogwarts when I found out. When Sebastien, Fleur's father, discovered you enjoy riding, he immediately offered me the chateau.” Harry said.

“But this... isn't this their ancestral home?” Integra asked. Harry shook his head.

“No.. well sorta. It belonged to the descendant of a different branch of the Delacour family, and Fleur's great grandfather inherited it. They used to use it as a a vacation home, but nobody has lived here full time for about fifty years now.” Harry explained Integra gave up and kissed him deeply, causing Seras to squeal happily. She broke off and leaned forward, leaning her head against his chest, then reaching out and pulling Seras close.

“I'm a little concerned about us spending a whole month away, given what is to come.” Integra said.

“We aren't going to do anyone any good by running ourselves to the point of exhaustion right before we're most needed. Besides... I've got a ton of things in the works that won't need my attention until we return, and I've prepared a portal in case we need to run back to put out a fire. The only thing I'm worried about is Zorin.” Harry said. Integra nodded.

“She'll be fine, she couldn't be in better hands. Besides, if she was too stubborn to ask you know Rip would.” Seras said with a grin.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Chapter 14

Integra woke up the next day with a ridiculous, goofy smile on her face. She looked at both of her lovers and smiled at the sight of them sleeping peacefully next to her. Through a feat of acrobatics she didn’t think possible she slipped out of the bed and made her way to the bathroom without waking them. She shivered as the cool air hit her naked skin, and reached for her robe which she’d had the foresight to bring with.

She was surprised to see a fresh copy of ‘Voix de Paris’ the French equivalent of the Daily Prophet on a small table next to the toilet. Her mood dimmed as she read through the front page article.

Magicals repoted missing from the streets of Belgrade!

In the magical districts of Belgrade, a hot spot in the ongoing White Lung pandemic, dozens of people have been reported missing by friends and family. Search efforts are hampered by quarantine restrictions, on both the magical and non-magique parts of the city. Authorities have requested that anyone who sees the people pictured below, report their locations to the Ministry immediately.

In the meantime, the Ministry again requests any non-human magicals with medical experience, magical or otherwise, please contact your local government to sign up and contribute to the relief efforts. White Lung has been proven to only affect entirely human individuals, any humans with non-human ancestry, be it Goblin, Veela, Vampire, Veela or House Elf have been proven to be immune from the disease. Your help may be the key to seeing us through this devastating illness.

The number of deaths associated with the pandemic remains low, with twelve known individuals having succumbed, but medical professionals all agree, that is unlikely to remain the case for long. As always, wash your hands vigorously after coming into contact with other people, avoid crowds as much as is feasible, and ensure any under-aged magicals are wearing bubblehead charms when travel amongst others is necessary. Furthermore, ensure all vaccinations are up to date, in order to keep your immune systems strong and healthy.

“Damn.” Integra said quietly.

“Integra? Where’d you go?!” Seras asked from outside the bathroom.

“I’m in the loo, I’ll be right out.” Integra said, taking the newspaper with her after washing her hands and walking into the room. Seras smiled brightly and sat up, grinning at Integra.

“That robe is lovely… but it looked better on the floor.” Seras said with an exaggeratedly sleazy leer. Integra laughed, and shrugged the robe off, letting it fall to the floor. Integra adored the way that Seras bit her lip when she took her in.

“I’m still a bit sore from last night you know.” Integra said, giggling when Seras started pouting.

“You’re no fun. What’s that?” Seras asked, pointing at the newspaper.

“Do you read French?” Integra asked. Seras shook her head, so she sat it down on the table and reached into Harry’s bag, withdrawing a blood replenisher, downing it before settling in beside Seras and tipping her head to the side. Seras grinned and rolled over on top of Integra, descending and gently biting her neck.

“White Lung is getting worse, and people have started disappearing in Belgrade.” Integra said. She glanced to the side as she saw Harry sit up and stretch his arms.

“Morning!” Harry said, before frowning at Seras.

“Seras! We’ve been married for a day and you’re already cheating on me with this tart?” Harry said, grinning.

“Tart?!” Integra asked, struggling not to laugh. Seras detached and smiled up at Integra.

“What can I say? She’s hot.” Seras said.

“She really is.” Harry said, laughing.

“Harry, I’m curious about something.” Seras said.

“Oh?” Harry asked. Seras nodded.

“I thought virgin blood was supposed to be different from.. uh… ‘worldly’ blood.” Seras said, causing Integra to laugh.

“Every vampire I’ve spoken to has attested to that.” Harry said with a shrug.

“Integra tastes the same, and I was there. She most certainly is no longer a virgin.” Seras said, leering at Integra again, who this time blushed and smiled.

“Strange… I’ll ask Imogene when we get back.” Harry said. Integra stilled.

“About Imogene… are you sure you’re okay about not using protection?” Integra asked. Harry smiled brightly.

“Are you sure you’re ok with potentially being pregnant again?” Harry retorted. Integra smiled.

“Of course… it’s just..” Integra said.

“All the babies, Integra. I’m going to have all the babies.” Harry said, leaning forward and kissing her.

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Schrodinger stood, his arms folded over his chest, looking extremely uncomfortable as a fifth year Gryffindor girl named Selena Miller loomed over him.

“You’re such a cutie!” She said, placing her hands on his shoulders and looking down fondly at him.

“Um.. thanks.” Schrodinger said quietly.

“You’re gonna be quite the lady killer when you’re older.” the girl said. Schrodinger shrugged.

“Excuse me, I’m supposed to meet some friends in the library.” Schrodinger said. He flinched when her hand went up and started playing with one of his ears.

“Oh, come on. They won’t mind if you’re just a little bit late…” The girl said.

“Tell me, Miller. How would you feel if I were pawing at you like that?” Andrew Brown, Seventh-year Hufflepuff and Head Boy said as he emerged from around the corner.

“My father would have your head!” Selena said. Brown’s grin grew predatory.

“And what pray tell do you think his father will do when he finds out you’ve got your hands on him?” Brown asked, positioning himself between him and Selena. She sputtered for a moment, and finding she had nothing to say she turned and stalked off.

“You ok, mate?” Brown asked Schrodinger.

“Yeah. Thanks, Brown.” Schrodinger said.

“Andrew, please. So before Miller decided to harass you, where were you heading? Curfew is in fifteen minutes.” Brown asked. Schrodinger fished through his things before producing a slip and handing it to the head boy.

“I’ve got watch with Mr. Watkins tonight.” Schrodinger said. Brown grimaced.

“I hate that we’ve got a firstie keeping watch over the castle like this…” Brown said.

“I assure you I’m quite capable.” Schrodinger said, looking rather offended. Brown looked at him for a moment before chuckling.

“No, that’s not what I meant. It’s just it shouldn’t be your responsibility. You should be worried about making friends and passing tests, though from what I hear you’re not having much trouble in either of those fields.” Brown said with a grin. Schrodinger rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, yeah.” Schrodinger said.

“Listen, mate. Let me know if she bothers you again, right? Headmistress McGonnagall and your father have enacted very clear rules about sexual harassment in this school. Nobody has to take that shit, right?” Brown said.

“I will. Thanks again.” Schrdoigner said. Brown nodded and took his leave. Schrodinger shook his head and reported to Watkins’ office. He knocked on the door and politely waited until he was admitted in.

“Mr. Blitz, please be seated. I assume you’ve met Mr. Filch here.” Tobias Watkins, newly minted School Security officer said.

“Yes, sir.” Schrodinger said.

“Pleasure to see you again, lad.” Filch said, offering his hand which Schrodinger shook.

“You as well, sir.” Schrodinger said.

“Make sure you don’t keep this young man up too late tonight. Vampires are normally nocturnal, but he is most certainly not, understood?” Filch said.

“Yes, sir.” Watkins said.

“Very good. You remember to practice with that rifle, now.” Filch said.

“Yes, sir.” Watkins said. Filch grinned.

“Ask Schrodinger here if you need any assistance. He’s quite the marksman.” Filch said.

“Of course.” Watkins said. Filch put his hat back on and walked out the door. Schrodinger noted that his posture was straighter, and he seemed more self-assured.

“He’s strict, but fair.” Watkins observed.

“He and I defended the castle when my Father returned from the infernal realm. He has some amazing stories from the war.” Schrodinger said.

“Right. Well to business then. I’ve got you for two hours, then it’s off to bed, understood? I want you to patrol the eastern corridors and then report back here in half an hour. Also, I want you to wear this at all times.” Watkins said, handing Schrodinger a long, floor-length trench coat that appeared to be of military design.

“Sir?” Schrodinger asked. Watkins’ expression softened.

“It’s got the strongest fire protection I can muster. It’s infused with flame retardant chemicals, a fire extinguishing potion and overloaded with flame freezing charms. After hearing what happened… I wanted you to be as safe as possible.” Watkins said. Schrodinger shivered, and nodded.

“Thank you, sir.” Schrodinger said.

“There’s loads of storage for ammunition, but Professor McGonagall has prohibited the carrying of firearms inside the castle unless it is under threat of attack, and I quite agree with that sentiment.” Watkins said.

“Of Course, sir. Small arms ammunition in a building made of magically-enhanced stone will ricochet quite a bit. Besides…” Schrodinger said, lifting one of his hands and transforming it into a set of wicked looking claws.

“I am not unarmed.” Schrodinger said with a grin. Watkins laughed.

“I suppose you’re not.” Watkins said.

“Sir, I have a question, and I am not in any way complaining, but why is it that I’m being asked to patrol?” Schrodinger said, wincing when his voice cracked.

“Well we have plenty of personnel and the seventh year prefects, head boy and head girl are all versed in myriad forms of defensive and offensive spells, however your father and Headmistress McGonagall agreed that if we didn’t include you, you’d have found a way to involve yourself under our noses. This way we can at least protect you.” Watkins said with a grin.

“What makes you say that?” Schrodinger asked.

“I’m only a few years older than your father, we all watched him traipse around the castle like he owned the place, killing dark lords and basilisks, saving all of our asses while the staff sat on their thumbs, neither of us have any doubt that you’d follow in his footsteps.” Watkins said with a grin. Schrodinger laughed.

“You know he’s not my biological father.” Schrodinger said.

“True, but given that he inspired Granger and Weasley to follow him without even trying, and given the valor you displayed in defending the school, I’m guessing it’s a safe bet.” Watkins said. Schrodinger blushed.

“Fair, I suppose.” Schrodinger said.

“Now come on, let’s get to it.” Watkins said, gesturing for Schrodinger to lead the way.

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“Mother, I’d like for you to consider selling the manor and moving to a smaller home.” Draco said.

“Preposterous! It’s been in my family for years, even if it bore your father’s name.” Narcissa said.

“Yes, it’s large, and very well known. Unless you’re planning on putting up the fidelius and making it unplottable, it is a big, obvious target and you live alone there.” Draco said. Narcissa sighed.

“I just.. I hate the idea of losing yet another piece of my history.” Narcissa said.

“So sell it to Sirius. For all we know he’s got properties all over muggle London.” Draco said.

“Muggle london?” Narcissa asked, vaguely disgusted.

“Mother look at what that thinking turned us into. IT’s a hard pill to swallow, believe me I know, but that nonsense about blood purity has ravaged our family. The Blacks are a shadow of what they once were. On top of that, look at what inbreeding has done to our family…” Draco said, sharply, but his tone softened when he continued.

“Your sister.” Draco continued. Narcissa’s eyes welled up.

“I know…” Narcissa said.

“The world is changing, mum. Lucius didn’t want to change with it, and now he’s dead.” Draco said. Narcissa sobbed and grabbed Draco, pulling him into a hug.

“I’m sorry, I hate being like that but it’s the truth. I don’t want Scorpius growing up thinking he’s superior to everyone else… Same with his little sister.” Draco said. Narcissa gasped and stared up at Draco who was smiling

“Really?” Narcissa said. Draco nodded and smiled.

“She’s about eight weeks along.” Draco said.

“Oh! This is wonderful news! Can I tell Andromeda?” Narcissa asked, her sorrow completely forgotten. Draco laughed and nodded.

“Go ahead, but make sure she doesn’t spread it around. Things are better but we still have many enemies on both sides.” Draco reminded her.

“Of course.. oh. That’s right. Draco you need to keep her safe! That horrible disease is going around.” Narcissa said.

“I know. We’ve taken steps. One of which is living in a small, unremarkable flat in muggle London.” Draco said, looking seriously at her.

“I’ll talk to Sirius tonight.” Narcissa promised.

“Good. You can’t spoil your grandchildren from beyond the grave.” Draco said. Narcissa laughed.

“Of course I can. That’s what wills are for.” Narcissa said.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

AN: Alright, checklist: 1. Leather jacket? Check. 2. Water skis? Check. 3. Shark? Check!

Chapter 15

“Hospitals are filling to capacity, with some bringing in trailers and even setting up tents as more and more people are afflicted by White Lung. The death toll has reached fifty thousand worldwide, and with no end in sight, drastic measures are being taken. The National quarantine has thus far remained effective, however all citizens of the United Kingdom are urged to take the preventative measures that are scrolling along the bottom of the screen right now. To reiterate: wash your hands frequently, and thoroughly using warm water and soap, disinfect any items that you may have received from overseas, and do not attempt to break the quarantine.

If you do choose to leave the UK, you will not be permitted to return until after a 20 day quarantine in an approved facility. Prime Minister Blair has committed millions of pounds to international relief efforts, and volunteers have been pouring in from throughout the country, putting together care packages. Factories producing personal protective equipment have been ramping up production, and are hiring factory workers at unprecedented rates. Stay tuned to the BBC for more updates.” a BBC anchor said, moments before with the click of a remote, the screen went blank.

“Harry, we should get back.” Integra said.

“I know..” Harry said, sighing.

“I don’t want to.” Integra said, snuggling into him. He ran his fingers through her hair.

“Neither do I. This was supposed to be special for you two.” Harry said.

“It was. This was the best week of my life, Harry.” Seras said, walking into the room nude, drying her hair.

“Holy shit…” Integra said, staring in awe at Seras. Harry grinned.

“You never get used to it. Both of you get more gorgeous every time I see you.” Harry said. Seras laughed.

“I agree though. We should return. Once things are better, we can come back and finish our honeymoon.” Seras said. Integra smiled and stood, kissing Seras before walking into the bathroom to take her shower.

“Seras? There’s something we need to talk about.” Harry said.

“What?” Seras asked.

“Integra.. She’s fully Human.” Harry said.

“So are you.” Seras said.

“Yes, but if I get sick and die I’ll come right back. We need to plan on what to do when it comes to the UK.” Harry said.

“It isn’t in the UK though…” Seras said.

“It will come, Seras. It’s impossible to keep it out entirely. All it takes is one person to sneak through a checkpoint, come over on a speedboat, or even be careless shipping something.” Harry said.

“Oh..” Seras said.

“Yeah.” Harry said.

“We could turn her?” Seras asked.

“Not after this week we can’t. She’s not a virgin any more.” Harry said.

“Right… Shit.” Seras said.

“Besides, that’s not a decision to make lightly.” Harry said. Seras nodded.

“I really really

really

want to beg you to whisk her away to safety and hide out…. But I can’t do that to her or you. I’d go spare if you did it to me.” Harry said.

“You’re right, but I appreciate the thought.” Integra said, wrapped in her towel as she walked out.

“Jesus.” Seras said.

“What?” Integra asked.

“Hot...” Harry said, staring. Integra grinned and dropped the towel.

*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.

“They’re coming back.” Rip said, hanging up her phone.

“I’m glad, but also I wish they’d been able to enjoy their honeymoon.” Zorin said, groaning as she settled into her chair.

“I feel the same. I hate this.. We get through one crisis only to find ourselves in another.” Rip said.

“The timing couldn’t be worse. We’re still preparing for Millennium’s invasion.” Zorin said. Rip sat on the ground in front of Zorin, pulled off her shoes and started rubbing her feet.

“Oh god in heaven fuck yes….” Zorin said, moaning in pleasure as Rip massaged her feet. Rip giggled.

“You need to be nicer to your mama.” Rip said, looking at her belly. She laughed when she saw a small bulge accompanied by Zorin groaning.

“They’re going to be just like their troublemaking father aren’t they?” Zorin asked. Just then she felt a vibration from her pocket, so she reached in and opened her compact.

“Schrodinger!” Zorin said.

“Hi Mom… Moms.” Schrodinger said with a grin.

“How are you?” Rip asked.

“Good. Got a free period between Potions and Charms. How are you doing?” Schrodinger asked.

“I’m good.” Zorin said.

“She’s tired, her feet hurt and she’s had some minor mood swings.” Rip corrected. Zorin glared at her, but there was no heat to it. Schrodinger laughed.

“And you’re making sure she rests, right?” Schrodinger asked.

“Yeah, yeah.” Zorin said, rolling her eyes.

“How’s school?” Rip asked.

“It’s ok.. everyone’s very tense though. I’ve been working with Mr. Filch and Professor McGonagall on safety drills in case Millennium tries something. Between that and the disease, everyone’s on edge. We’ve been trying to find a way to keep spirits up, but nothing’s working.

“I bet Harry will have some ideas, why don’t you ask him?” Zorin asked.

“I don’t want to interrupt them.” Schrodinger said.

“They’re coming back soon, with things getting worse Harry can’t really be away.” Rip said.

“I’m glad, but also that sucks.” Schrodinger said.

“Yes it does.” Zorin said. A bright flash of blue light appeared behind Schrodinger causing him to duck just as a bit of debris fell down from the ceiling.

“Sorry ‘bout that, mate!” a boy’s voice yelled from behind him, followed by the shrill shrieking of Madame Pince.

“What was that?” Zorin asked.

“I’m fairly certain a sixth year Gryffindor just had a practical joke played on them here in the library. I should go, I have no desire to get caught up in that.” Schrodinger said with a grin. Rip laughed.

“We love you, son.” Zorin said.

“Love you moms!” Schrodinger said, closing the connection.

*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.

“You’re serious?” Amelia Bones asked, sitting at her desk. An unspeakable in a dark green cloak nodded.

“Muggles with no magical ancestry don’t see the effect, they simply die, but if there’s even a squib a few generations back… it happens.” The unspeakable said.

“That explains why the muggle news isn’t talking about this.” Amelia said.

“This is bad, Amelia. If this becomes widespread, you can kiss the statute of secrecy goodbye.” The unspeakable said. Amelia nodded.

“I’ll contact the Emperor immediately. Hit the books, find anything even resembling this that you can.” Amelia said. The unspeakable nodded.

“Make sure your Aurors practice up on the flame whip spell.” The unspeakable said before turning and leaving Amelia’s office.

“Shit shit shit shit shit….” Amelia said as she fumbled through her robes, withdrawing her compact. She opened it and wrote Harry’s name in the makeup.

“Amelia, is everything alright?” Harry asked.

“No, Harry. Will you be returning soon?” Amelia asked.

“We’re just getting the last of our stuff packed, Amelia what’s wrong?” Harry asked.

“White lung. I just had an unspeakable in here with some rather dire news. The disease is killing muggles, faster and faster any day, but anyone with even a hint of magic in their blood, it’s turning into some sort of inferius...” Amelia said.

“Fuck…” Harry said.

“We need to go now!” Seras said from behind him.

“Leave the bags, Ascott can grab them.” Integra said.

“Harry, apparate there now. We’ll meet you at the manor after.” Integra said.

“Right.. be safe.” Harry said, closing the compact and kissing his wife and girlfriend before disappearing with a quiet pop.

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Harry arrived at the Ministry building and made his way up to Amelia’s office. He grimaced as he looked upward and saw thousands of paper planes flying around between departments. The last time it had been even close to that busy was right after the attack on London. It was telling how serious things were that he was greeted by simple nods or ‘Welcome back, Harry’ instead of mocking adulation.

Amelia ushered him into her office as he approached, her door had been propped open to allow the planes unfettered access, as she was the recipient of much of the correspondence. She did, however, direct him to close the door when he walked in. He sat in a chair across from her desk, looking over a growing pile of correspondence that required her attention.

“Where to begin….” Amelia said.

“How did we discover the issue?” Harry asked.

“A group of unspeakables were dispatched to a Lithuanian magical community to help with relief efforts. Someone reported that bodies had gone missing, so they investigated… then they found them.” Amelia said.

“What do we know about them?” Harry asked.

“Not much. It takes around a day for them to reanimate, and when they do, everything that made them who they were is gone. They’re faster and stronger than they were before, but the unspeakables think that’s simply because their bodies no longer respond to fatigue or pain. The only magic that seems to be able to stop them is fire magic, even muggle guns were tested. We’ve been training everyone on flame whips and for the more skilled witches and wizards, fiendfyre.” Amelia said.

“Good. What happened to the unspeakables in Lithuania?” Harry asked.

“Both infected. They’ve volunteered to serve as test subjects…” Amelia said tiredly.

“Damn.” Harry said.

“We’ve reached out to the other countries, and we’re getting similar reports everywhere. Aurors and Obliviators are working overtime to preserve the statute worldwide, but I’m not sure how long that will work.” Amelia said.

“I need to speak with to the ICW.” Harry said, conjuring his patronus and whispering into its ear. It nodded and trotted off.

“What for?” Amelia asked. Harry sighed.

“In a couple of months we’re going to be attacked by Millennium again, that’s common knowledge. Between that, and now the fucking zombie apocalypse apparently, I’m not sure the statue is worth keeping up.” Harry said. Amelia gasped.

“You can’t be serious….” Amelia said. Harry nodded.

“We’d waste ungodly resources and lives in what will simply be a futile effort at delaying the muggles from finding out anyway. There’s simply no way to contain this. Do you know how many squibs have integrated into Muggle society over the last thousand years? I wouldn’t be surprised if one out of every ten muggles out there have enough magic in their blood to be affected.” Harry said. Amelia paled.

“Merlin…” Amelia said. Harry nodded.

“I’ll handle things on the international front. I want you to get with the other departments and start compartmentalizing the government. I want every department in a different building, and hermetically sealed doors between rooms in all government buildings. The spells are simple enough. Have Imogene put together a pamphlet going over how to prevent infection, and mitigate risk in case that fails, including how to deal with the dead. Tell Eric I want to talk to him when I get back.” Harry said, standing and walking out the door.

“Thank you for coming back, Harry.” Amelia said. Harry smiled.

“I’d say I’m happy to be back, but it’d be a lie.” Harry said.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

Chapter 16

“The last man that stood before this body and proposed this was Gellert Grindlewald.” Antonia Gomez, Spanish National and Chief Mugwump of the ICW said.

“I get it. Truly, I do, and I’m not suggesting we start advertising our presence right now. Instead, I believe we should prepare for the eventuality of the Statute of Secrecy failing. With white lung ravaging both the magical and muggle world, all of the sudden disappearances all over Europe, and the fact that London was recently attacked by nazis in zeppelins of all things, if we add the abrupt, uncontrolled revelation of a secret magical underworld to the mix and there will be violence.” Harry said, addressing the ICW

“Potter, why are you even here? Your country refused to rejoin the ICW.” Liu Chen, the Chinese representative said.

“You will address Emperor Potter with respect, Representative Chen. He is here as an honored guest.” Gomez said.

“It’s fine, Chief Mugwump. Representative Chen raises a valid point.” Harry said, leaning forward on the podium and taking a deep breath.

“The Zeppelins that attacked London were staged originally in Germany, and flew, unimpeded, through France. Our government at the time did nothing in preparation, but the Muggle Government warned you, and begged you to act. I begged you to act. You did nothing.” Harry said, pausing to sip his water. He glared at Chen.

“During the Grindlewald war, Magical Britain sent ten thousand of its sons and daughters to foreign lands to help them fight a foreign threat. Eight thousand of them returned. The blood of two thousand of my countrymen helped to buy your freedom from a tyrannical monster, and when our own monster rose up… You did nothing.” Harry said, taking a sip of water and clearing his throat before continuing.

“Representative Chen, the ICW failed our people nearly as much as our own government did. To be entirely honest, we don’t give a toss what any of you think about us. I’m not here to convince any of you to do anything. I came here to warn you. It is a matter of when, not if, that this illness will reveal at least as mall part of the magical world to the muggles. When that happens, all hell will break loose and we need to be prepared. I have been working closely with Tony Blair, the muggle Prime Minister, on a strategy for informing the general public of our existence for when that happens. We have been stockpiling food, potions and potions ingredients. We’re establishing emergency shelters hidden with magic, we’re hiring aurors and training them to deal with civil unrest. We are preparing as best we possibly can, and you should be too. Tell your governments to get off their asses. Gather the things you think you’ll need to live in isolation if it is required for extended periods. Do something. I beg you.” Harry said, before turning and storming off without leave, ignoring the words shouted at him as he left.

He felt morose as he made his way to the ICW building’s apparition point. He could only hope that his words had resonated with at least a few of them. He and his ministers had run the numbers, the UK could easily support a hundred thousand magical refugees from mainland Europe, but it could not guarantee that none of them would arrive with White Lung. It killed him, but he had to prioritize his people.

The worst thing is, he had been acutely aware of the fact that being in power meant making decisions that potentially lead to the deaths of large amounts of people when he was thrust into the role. He had just started concentrating on his destination when the compact in his pocket vibrated. He pulled it out and opened it, and was surprised to see Fleur’s face in the mirror.

“’Arry!” Fleur said happily.

“Hey Fleur. How’s it going?” Harry asked.

“Good… it’s good.. Listen, do you have a moment?” Fleur asked. Harry looked at his watch and grinned.

“By some insane coincidence I do, I’m not needed at the ministry building for another two hours, and my wife and girlfriend are out on a date. What do you need?” Harry asked.

“Wife and girlfriend?” Fleur asked, her eyebrow raised.

“Yup…” Harry said grinning.

“So Integra made her move?” Fleur asked with a smile.

“She did indeed, though Seras had to browbeat her.” Harry said with a chuckle.

“You’ll need to tell me the story later. Right now, there is an issue at Gringott’s Paris branch. There is a situation that Papa feels requires your attention specifically.” Fleur said cryptically. She very much did not like the feral smirk that appeared on Harry’s face.

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“This feels weird without Harry.” Integra said.

“Yeah, but it’s nice, right?” Seras asked nervously.

“Oh definitely. I’m having a wonderful time, Seras.” Integra said, reaching her hand across the table and squeezing Seras’. Seras smiled gratefully and took a sip of ‘wine’ that Integra had sneakily produced when nobody was looking.

“I’m glad.” Seras said.

“Is it a lot different from Harry’s?” Integra asked gesturing towards her glass. Seras looked down and nodded.

“They’re both wonderful in different ways. They taste similar, but the feelings they evoke are different. Like with Harry, there’s a confident playfulness about it. It also has a pleasant burn, like Whiskey.” Seras said.

“Oh?” Integra asked. Seras nodded.

“Yours.. Yours is.. God how do I describe it? Sophistication. Passion. Sensuousness, all tinged with a miniscule bit of self-doubt?” Seras asked. Integra’s eyes widened.

“You, uh.. You got all that?” Integra asked, not without a small amount of self-consciousness. Seras giggled.

“Integra you’ve never been in a relationship with anyone, and now you’re with two people who adore you. You should have seen me when Harry and I started dating. I woke up every morning wondering whether it had been a dream, or if he was simply playing with my heart.” Seras said.

“What changed it?” Integra asked.

“Time. Waking up day after day with him beside me. Always coming back together after little arguments. We even had a rule, if we fought, no matter how angry or upset we were, we would never leave each other without a hug or a kiss. It took a while but eventually I realized that it was all real, and that he wasn’t going anywhere.” Seras said, before taking Integra’s hands.

“Integra, like I said it will take time, but try to remind yourself, We’re here. It’s real… and we love you. I love you.” Seras said, looking directly into Integra’s now watery eyes.

“I.. I love you too.” Integra said, her lip trembling. Seras leaned in and kissed her. Their moment was interrupted when the waiter arrived and placed the bill on their table without a word. They separated, Seras grinning when she noticed Integra was blushing.

“I think.. I think I’d like to go home now..” Integra said.

“Oh.. Um, ok. I was really having fun though…” Seras said.

“No, Seras. I’d like for you to take me home…” Integra said, giving her a knowing look. This time Seras blushed and Integra laughed.

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“Hey Alucard.” Harry said wandering onto the Hellsing grounds where Alucard and Zorin were ‘playing golf’ by nearly sending the balls into orbit.

“’Suuuup?” Alucard asked. Harry walked over and hugged Zorin before turning to Alucard who pouted.

“Fine..” Harry said, hugging Alucard.

“That’s better.” Alucard said.

“So.. You wanna go bother some French Goblins?” Harry asked.

“Ooh field trip!” Alucard said with a grin.

“Why do you need to bother French Goblins?” Zorin asked, looking at them, amused.

“My friend Fleur just contacted me, there’s been an incident at Gringott’s Paris, and quite frankly I could use a distraction from all this White Lung business. I have it on good authority, you can be quite distracting.” Harry said.

“Well, I don’t like to brag…” Alucard said.

“Yes you do.” Zorin said, laughing. Harry and Alucard looked strangely at Zorin who was suddenly self-conscious. She looked down at herself and back up to them.

“What?” Zorin asked. Harry took out his compact and scribbled a name in, waiting for the face to appear.

“Fleur, how urgent is the Gringott’s thing?” Harry asked.

“Not too urgent, though It wouldn’t be wise to postpone it too much.” Fleur said.

“Good. Something just came up.” Harry said.

“Ugh, seriously?” Fleur said, rolling her eyes.

“It’s extremely important, I wouldn’t rain check you if it wasn’t.” Harry said.

“I know. I was just teasing. Let me know.” Fleur said.

“Thanks.” Harry said, closing the compact.

“Harry, what’s going on?” Zorin asked. She hadn’t noticed Alucard disappearing during the conversation.

“So How you feeling, Zorin?” Harry asked with a grin.

“What? I feel ok.. a bit hungry.” Zorin said.

“Well I can hook you up on the way.” Harry said, bringing out his compact again.

“On the way where?” Zorin asked.

“Harry, what can I do for you?” Pip asked.

“Can you bring the car around the front lawn please?” Harry asked. Pips eyes widened and he nodded, closing it without comment.

“Harry what’s going on? You’re scaring me.” Zorin said.

“Here we go, sorry for the wait, it required adjustment. She is much taller than Master.” Alucard said.

“What are you….” Zorin said, turning and looking in confusion as Alucard was approaching pushing a wheelchair.

“Harry?” Zorin asked. She shuddered as her legs suddenly felt warm.

“Rip’s on her way.” Alucard said with a grin as he helped Zorin down into the wheelchair.

“Oh.. oh my god… Harry!!” Zorin said. Harry grinned.

“Ready to meet Harry Jr. 5: The Empire Strikes Back?” Harry said.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

AN: A slightly shorter than normal one. Just wanted to take this opportunity to beg anyone reading this to be kind to the people around you. You don’t have to understand what they’re going through to support them. Hell, until you’ve lived a day in their shoes, that’s impossible. The world is changing, and not just in my country. It feels like we’re approaching a fork in the road. We can take one path, and continue down the road of painfully slow progress that we’ve been on, or veer right and double back to a world gripped by the insanity of totalitarianism. Either way there’s a lot of sad, angry, and frightened people out there, some of whom you love. Reach out, let them know you care, they probably need it, and if you’re in need of hearing it, even though I have no idea who you are and we’ve never nor will we ever meet, I care and I hope you’re doing as well as you can be.

Chapter 17.

“You must be proud.” Imogene told Harry as he looked fondly at the two new mothers, asleep in each other’s arms.

“I am. You know I was expecting Harry Jr. 5: The Empire Strikes Back, I wasn’t expecting a whole trilogy.” Harry said looking at the cribs next to the bed, containing three beautiful, healthy dhampir babies.

“You really should start getting them ultrasounds.” Imogene laughed. Harry chuckled.

“We like surprises.” Harry said.

“Where’s that troublemaking vampire friend of yours?” Imogene asked, checking a few items off a clipboard before hanging it on the door.

“Retrieving Seras and Integra. Imogene, how go preparations for accepting infected?” Harry asked. Imogene frowned.

“We have plenty of beds and can isolate individual rooms and entire wards without problem, but I don’t think we could contain a zombie horde.” Imgoene said.

“What do you need from me?” Harry asked.

“I’m working on a few angles. The yanks have sent over twelve virologists from the CDC, all aware of the magical world, they’re currently going through quarantine. Once they’re out they’re going to help us set up better containment.” Imogene said.

“Why here? There’s hot spots all over the continent.” Harry observed.

“They’re hoping to use the UK as a staging area for the response. They’ve got it mostly contained in the States so far, but it’s a matter of time before it hits a large population center, they need a safe place to do research.” Imogene said. Harry nodded.

“The ICW is none too pleased with the MACUSA senate.” Imogene continued.

“The ICW can suck it. While they’re sitting in their comfortable chambers posturing around like a bunch of ponces, people are out there dying.” Harry spat. Imogene nodded.

“Agreed. Another thing you should know, we’ve been contacted by representatives of the Argentinian, Canadian, South African, and Kenyan magical governments asking for guidance, and offering resources.” Imogene said.

“We’ll take them up on it, and I’ll share everything we know.” Harry said without hesitating. Imogene sighed.

“I’m sorry Harry. Now it looks like the whole world is looking to you for solutions to its problems, not just the UK.” Imogene said. Harry shrugged.

“I never expected the job to be easy.” Harry said.

“Do you think we’re going to make it through this?” Imogene asked. Harry grasped one of her shoulders and squeezed gently.

“Of course!” Harry said with a grin.

“God I wish I had your confidence…” Imogene said.

“Confidence? Nah. I have faith. Faith in my friends, both new and old. Can’t lose when you’re hanging around this lot!” Harry said with an easy smile. Imogene shook her head and smiled.

“Well if you say so, then that’s how it is. Excuse me, I have other patients to see.” Imogene said.

“Thanks again, Imogene.” Harry said sincerely.

“Thank you, Harry.” Imogene said. Moments after she closed the door, the smile melted off of his face. He was thankful that he was alone at the moment, anyone who saw him would swear he’d aged a decade overnight. He hadn’t lied, he did have faith in those around him. This oncoming storm however, was far, far scarier than most people knew. Again, Harry found himself at the center of a situation where the only thing he could guarantee is that people were going to die. People were already dying. Harry sighed, and the smile returned, at least a little, when he saw a tiny pair of bright red eyes staring at him from inside the middle crib.

The as of yet nameless child, which Harry referred to as ‘Harry Jr. 6: The Empire Strikes Back’ since 5 had been dubbed ‘A New Hope’, was uncommonly responsive to outside stimuli almost immediately after birth. Of course the first thing he did, along with his brothers, was feed. After, the other two had almost immediately fallen asleep. The middle child on the other hand, he was too excited, it seemed.

Before falling asleep, Rip had remarked that he almost looked like he was studying his surroundings intently. For all Harry knew, he was, there were so few dhampir babies born in the UK, they could even at this age have some semblance of the predatory vampire instincts. What was peculiar though, is that the boy seemed completely at ease, as though he was merely curious. Harry reached down and scooped him up, smiling down at him. There was a shift in the baby’s gaze, and Harry could swear he was getting the sense that the baby was amused about something.

“Don’t you worry little man, Your mommies are some of the strongest people I know, you’ve got nothing to fear. Your dad’s alright too I guess.” Harry said, reaching a finger towards the baby. The baby grabbed ahold of it, and crossed his eyes, examining the finger closely. After a moment he let it go and looked back up at Harry, the amused expression returning.

“I know things are scary right now, it’s your first day, and already you’ve met so many new people. Change is scary, but scary really isn’t that big a deal then is it? Fear can often be the herald of something wonderful, just around the corner.” Harry said. The baby’s lips curled upwards into a smile and his eyes were filled with mirth.

“You know I’m not scared about anything really. Ok, that’s a blatant lie and we both know it. Scary just.. it’s easier, now that I have all of you in my life.” Harry said sincerely. The baby squeaked quietly and reached his hands upwards.

“Yeah you’re a smart little boy aren’t you? You…. Uncle Alucard is floating above me making faces at my back isn’t he?” Harry asked.

“Careful, your Daddy’s learning.” Alucard said as he shifted into existence behind him.

“Stop corrupting my kids, jerk.” Harry said, laughing and handing the baby to Alcuard who accepted him with a smirk.

“So does this little monster have a name yet?” Alucard asked.

“Nope, but I can’t wait for Zorin and Rip to tell us.” Harry said.

“You’re not chiming in?” Alucard asked. Harry shrugged.

“Only if they ask, and they haven’t yet. I’m definitely gonna be there and dad the hell out of these babies, but I refuse to step on Zorin and Rip’s toes. I’m just happy to be a part of all this.” Harry said.

“I have news from the vampires. Hector it seems has been deposed. Their new leader is Bohdana Lysenko, she hails originally from Ukraine. They’ve agreed to assist with our efforts.” Alucard explained.

“What happened with Hector?” Harry asked.

“He put up a hell of a fight, but she was just stronger and smarter. It was quick.” Alucard said. “I hope Hector is still alive…” Harry said. Alucard laughed.

“Of course. They’re not idiots, Harry. They’re not about to squander this second chance they’ve earned on stupid, pointless murder.” Alucard said.

“I’m glad.” Harry said. The door opened, admitting an elated Seras who immediately ran forward and stole the baby from Alucard, and integra who was glaring at the elder vampire.

“You could have waited for us.” Integra said.

“Sure I could have.” Alucard said, nodding and grinning.

“He’s beautiful.” Seras said.

“They all are.” Harry said with a grin.

“What?” Seras and Integra asked together. Harry gestured behind him, where two cribs were occupied and a third was vacant. Harry cast a hasty muffliato just in time for Seras and Integra to nearly deafen him with excited squeals. Harry giggled when he looked at the one in Seras’s arms that seemed to be glaring at his wife and girlfriend.

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“I-I’m afraid of dogs, Mr. Black.” A small, skinny boy named Bobby said to Sirius who was kneeling and smiling at him.

“Some of them can be scary, but did you want to know a secret?” Sirius asked.

“What?” The boy asked.

“I can turn into a dog!” Sirius said. The boy rolled his eyes.

“Sure, sir. Go ahead and pull the other one.” The boy said. Sirius grinned and stepped a bit back from him before transforming into his animagus form. The boy froze in terror for a moment, before seemingly remembering that the lumbering Irish Wolfhound in front of him was in fact the owner of the orphanage. He swiftly transformed back.

“Wow…” The boy said. Sirius nodded.

“It’s definitely an interesting experience. One you might be able to achieve some day. Tell me, why is it that you’re afraid of dogs? Were you bitten?” Sirius asked. The boy nodded and held out his arm, which bore a very old, well-healed scar.

“That makes sense, I can see why you’d be afraid of them. You know what I’m afraid of? Dementors. You know what those are?” Sirius asked. He shook his head.

“They’re these scary monsters that feed off of your positive emotions, leaving only negative feelings behind. They used to guard Azkaban, and I was stuck there for twelve years, with them constantly coming by and haunting us.” Sirius said, settling on the ground in front of him.

“The thing is, because I knew I was innocent, and I could turn into a dog, they had no idea what to do with me and eventually, they avoided me because they were afraid. I bet the dog that bit you was afraid too.” Sirius said. The boy shrugged.

“I like to think of fear as either a prison guard, or a teacher. You can let it hold you back, and keep you away from experiencing new things... Or, you can learn from it and let it make you stronger.” Sirius said.

“I guess.” The boy said. Sirius smiled and stood, helping him to his feet too.

“I think it’s one of those things that makes more sense when you’re older.” Sirius said. A teenage girl named Chloe jogged up to them and got Sirius’ attention.

“Mr. Black, they need you to sign for something in the main office.” Chloe said.

“Alright then. You ok, Bobby?” Sirius asked. The boy looked up and smiled at him, before nodding. Sirius hugged him and followed Chloe back to his office, and he was just out of earshot when Bobby started coughing.