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It's a Friday afternoon, a modest house sits in front of a dark, dewy forest. It's early spring and the days are still shorter and the night quickly approaches. The house itself is lively among the gentle breeze and silence beyond.“Hunter, it’s dinner time!” Vee called from up the stairs of the basement. She was meant with brief silence.“Hunter?”“Okay…I’ll be up in a bit.”“Hurry! Mamá made milanesa y arroz!” and with that, she retreated away from the basement, leaving the door open.Below, inside the basement sat Hunter on his desk. It was a new desk that Darius had gifted him from the Demon realm. Much larger than the small blocky one of before with many more drawers installed. The top of the desk was a cluttered mess of fabrics, stuffing, paper, and drawing equipment.Yet with all the items he would need to entertain himself, to create something, he couldn't bring himself to do anything. Not to sew another silly hat for stringbean or draw Chief O’Baily as a wolf. Nothing.His hands hurt.Before he’d be able to sit down and sew admittedly ugly shirts for hours, draw pages and pages of his favorite scenes in cosmic frontier in comic form, or even try doodling scenes digitally on the old laptop with some of the drawing programs Luz had downloaded.But he can't now.It doesn't make sense. For years he’s had hand pain, it was just a part of him. Whether it was from training, punishments or whatever he had been doing back in the Emperor's coven, his hand hurt. He’s always had these scars, these callouses, and this ache.So why was it so debilitating now?He had gloves sure, but they got in the way of his crafts. Mama had brought him compression gloves and why they did help a bit, it didn't stop the bone deep stabbing pain or the shaking.After halloween, after the possession, after Belos took over his body and killed his best friend. His whole body seemed to be falling apart. Because ruining his life wasn't enough, he also had to ruin the fleshy prison he lived in.His whole body was messed up, his hands were just the most frustrating.“Hunter?!”“Coming!”He finally made his way up the stairs and walked to the kitchen to be greeted by the sight of his mama serving some dishes. Vee was at the table rambling about somethings excitedly. She was in her basilisk form. Her frilly ear perked up and she looked at him with a small smile on her face.“Finally someone decided to show up.”He gave a small sheepish smile of his own. “Ha, was working on something or uh was trying to.” He winced.Before Vee could say anything, Mama interfered.“Hey hijo, come help me set the table up, yeah?”“Okay mama.”He grabbed some silverware from a drawer and placed it at the table, ignoring the spikes of cold pain shooting out. He went to grab some cups, ignoring the way his hand shook and threatened to drop them. He quickly placed the cups down.He saw Vee get up and grab some jugo de piña from the fridge and serve the juice into the cups. He sighed softly with relief, not wanting to think about the mess he could have made if his shaking hands had created splatters all over the counter or worse, made him drop the entire jug of juice.He shot her a look of gratefulness and she simply smiled sadly at him. She understood him the best. Mama set the plates up at the table and soon everyone was seated.Today it was just him, mama, and Vee home. Luz was back at the demon realm doing Titan knows what. She wouldn’t be returning back until monday with him after school. She’d started doing some sort of hybrid enrollment where she went to human school some days and online others. She attended hexside some days with a smaller criteria on what to do to graduate. He thought it was cool she was able to graduate from two schools.He wouldn’t dare think of attending Human Realm school even if these days he found himself going to the demon realm a little less than before. Upon returning he stayed with Darius a bit and even The Owl Lady before making the decision to primarily stay with Camilia in the Human Realm.The woman had expressed seeing him as her own and he cried when he realized she was the only adult to show nothing but pure kindness for him in his life and how he desperately wanted her to be his parent. To be his mama.Only going back for school on Mondays and Wednesdays, sometimes the weekend if he could bring himself to. He already completed his education and beyond, he only really went for his friends and flier derby Theirs where no games going on for the time being so it was mainly just practice with friends. Flying had also started becoming more of a chore as his wrist and legs throbbed.Captain had been disappointed at this and Hunter felt bad for being relieved.It may be better this way, he knew plenty of witches and demons didn’t want him at the Demon Realm. He deserved that even if his friends and family disagreed. They never saw the horrors he's committed. The lives he took and ruined.So maybe he did deserve some of this pain, even if it prevented him from eating his mama’s cooking, as annoying as it was.He found himself struggling with his fork, as he messily stabbed the meat in attempts to cut it. Before giving up, leaving the meat full of tiny punctures instead of clean cuts. The crumbs of the meat being more on the sides of his plate then on the food. Scoping the rice was frustrating as his hands shook, causing it to spill back into his plate and some on the table. At least none of it was on the floor yet.He stared at the food with annoyance. He saw from the side of his eye, mama and Vee looking at each other with concerned faces. Vee silently reaches forward and hands him a spoon she must have grabbed when they were in the kitchen for him. .“Thanks” he murmurs, before finally scooping up some rice and putting it in his mouth. Titan he was pitiful.“Do you want me to cut the meat for you, cariño?”He glances at her plate. She was already halfway done with her food, her milanesa perfectly cut up into strips. He looked at his plate which was a mess of rice, crumbs, and a full piece of stabbed meat. He barely ate anything.He hates how pitiful he is. What seventeen year old still has their parents cut up a piece of soft meat for them? He became a scout at seven for Titans-sake! His friends and family already know he hates receiving help and he hates that he needs it.“...Yes please.”She leans forward and pulls his plate towards her. He shakily hands her his fork and she gets to cutting the food into perfect little strips.He stares at the back of his hand on the table. Eyes tracing over the ugly scars, trying his best to ignore the bright yellow sigil underneath.He saw healers back at the Demon Realm. They could do nothing for the scars but give him ointments and creams to help the dryness and visible inflammation. They’d tried giving him potions and medication to help with his chronic pain after one particular incident of him collapsing and just weeping from the pain led to his friends dragging him to the clinic.Unfortunately, for potions to even work on him with the state he was in, they had to be strong. Even more unfortunately, strong potions tend to have side effects. The potions often left him nauseous and without appetite. He was already getting used to eating normally and gaining healthy weight, to have that be taken away was to leave him frail and malnourished again.He also feared developing a reliance on them. He’d already struggled with becoming dependent on potions in the past and he did not need a repeat of that. Those energy potions he took back at the castle were one hell of a drug. For now he took a mild potion that at least helped with inflammation, especially with the pin and needle numbness that he felt on his face and torso. Though not much for soreness and the shakes. He also took other mild potions that helped little by little but not for pain, or at least the physical kind.He's gone to physical therapy to help improve the movement of his limbs and additional lessons on pain management. Now he had a bunch of random little gadgets that gave him some relief but never actually ended the pain. At least the healer had been kind and provided him with a plan, exercises and techniques to help. Even if he couldn’t be bothered to go over it for weeks now.As much as it sucked at least the creams, ointments and compression clothing helped, even if it was just temporary or didn't stop him from wanting to rip his bones out his body. Titan, he wished Flapjack was here.“Hunter..!”Snapped out of his thoughts, he looks at Vee.“Yes?”“Mama’s talking to you.”He looks towards mama. She slides his plate back to him.“Oh, uh sorry mama.”“It's okay cariño. Did you hear what I said?”“No, sorry.”“Again, it's ok. Your hands are flaring up again? You don’t want your gloves? Did you take your potion?”“Ah, yeah it's fine. No, the gloves don’t stop the shaking, that's what's bothering me. Yes, I took it this morning.”He gets back to eating, looking away from his family. His food is getting cold. He could feel their sad gazes on his face.“It’s fine.” He assures without looking up, trying to finish his food quickly. They were already done eating.There's a beat of silence before-“We think you should get a service dog.” Vee blurts out.“Vee!” His mama scolds Vee, who simply smiles sheepishly.He pauses and just blinks before turning. A service dog?“What?”“Ya know, a dog that helps with tasks for owners who need assistance…I know you know what a dog is.”“I know what a dog is dummy.”He is quite fond of dogs. There were plenty of canine beasts in the Demon Realm but he likes the dogs of the Human Realm the best. After seeing some on the street, thinking they were some weird looking wolves, he discovered he enjoyed their presence. Scratch that. He loved dogs. He loved all the animals of the Human Realm, even the weird little bugs they had. But something about dogs and their friendly, excitable nature warmed something in his gladorstone.Especially since he got to see plenty of them when he visited at his mama's clinic. Where he was able to pet and hang out with all the recovering animals. He liked all the animals but the dog's energy made him the happiest, it reminded him of Flapjack even more so than the birds.They're like wolves but you can actually pet them.“I don’t need one. I can still see.”“Oh but cariño, service dogs don’t just help with blind people. They could help all sorts of issues that a person may have. Like seizures, diabetes, fainting and even things like chronic pain and mental problems.”He pauses eating, he’s almost done. He’d visited a psychiatrist in the Demon Realm a few months ago, or a psych healer as they call themselves. He was diagnosed with C-PTSD, anxiety and depression. They’d also considered giving him a referral for an evaluation for autism but the previous diagnosis had been a punch to the gut enough.He took two more potions for the anxiety and depression which admittedly made him a bit sleepy and sometimes irrationally angry even if they were pretty mild then what his recommended dosage had been.Three potions, all pretty mild but he couldn’t help but feel ashamed.He’s tried therapy after what felt like forever trying to find one that met his criteria and was actually willing to take him in that wasn’t shitty or had ulterior motives for the ex Golden Guard. And once he found his therapist he went for a while. Though it was fine, dare he say helpful. Then it hurt.As his brain forced him to remember things he blocked. That he blocked out for good reason. Memories that had long been shoved away resurfaced and Hunter was left paralyzed with fear. Everyone told him that it was a part of therapy, a part of processing trauma that led to a path to healing. He thought it was just more nightmare material that left him awake at night hyperventilating.He’d quit therapy and refused to go back no matter how much the people pleaded him to go back. Ok.. maybe not plead but strongly recommend to go back. He couldn’t bring himself to and they left it at that. He’s thought about going back now that he thinks he understands a little more but can't bring himself too.A dog sounds a lot better than that. He finds himself briefly imagining a dog relaxing with him on the couch as a movie or documentary play. Or will accompany him on his morning walks. He dares even to imagine a dog retrieving his clothes or phone for him on days he couldn’t bring himself to get up from bed. He wants that.Then he thinks of red feathers.He shakes his head. “No, I don't need one.” He states firmly and gets back to finishing his food. Almost done. Just three more bites. It’s gone cold already.“But you do.” Vee frowns, ignoring his glare. “I'm sorry hermano but it's true. You dissociate all the time, a dog can help with that!”He knows she's being nice and just listing off one reason. He has a bunch more that can maybe, just maybe justify getting a service dog but he still doesn't need one.It’s often that he finds himself stuck. Frozen in a place where everything around him washes away and before he knows it hours have passed by. Sometimes he’s frozen and unaware that he is, other times he’s aware but just can't get out. The time is still the same. Sometimes his friends try to break him out of it but noise and sight become vague fuzzy things.That's only when he’s frozen, it's worse when he’s moving and then somehow finds himself in a place he shouldn't be.“Look, Vee is saying this because of the story Luz told us. One of you is dissociating at school.” Mama speaks up, her eyes filled with worry.Yeah, he knows this story. How after a rough night he froze up sometime during first period, advanced potions and went to lunch three periods later confused on why he wasn't in the castle. That Luz had caught him simply loitering around and had to practically drag him to the lunch table. How his friends had to explain to him that he wasn’t back at the castle on patrol. He ended up leaving early that day.There's more stories similar to that, this just so happens to be the more recent public display of his instability.“Yeah, well I’m not the only one with P-TSD, Vee dissociates too and Luz has nightmares. Why don’t you guys get dogs then” He counters back.“Because unlike you, Luz still goes to therapy and I found my own coping methods like hanging out with friends and doing social activities. We all have our coping methods but you don’t.”“I exercise, sew and draw.” He knows his argument is weak compared to hers.“Yeah, and how’s that working for you.” She fired back, looking at his hands.“Vee!” Mama hisses at her. Rather than looking scared, Vee just looks upset.“What?! It’s true and you know it is!” She turns back to him. “All you do is mope around and let yourself be in pain when you don't need to be. You barely hang out with your friends, you barely even talk to mami and me, and you say you do your hobbies but I don’t see anything done because it hurts too much. You still aren't well enough to take stronger potions but you aren't letting yourself become well to take the potions, s-so it just becomes a dumb cycle of pain!” She rants, expressing all the worry she felt for him.For a long time she’s been watching her brother, the person she loves and trusts, the person who understands her the most, letting himself rot away. And it hurts! She’s seen him thrive at life, be genuinely happy but that was going away and she needed him to bring it back.“I just want you to get better…”The room is silent. Hunter stares at Vee who glares back, her eyes shining with unshed tears. He looks at mama who’s looking back and forth between her two children, eyebrow pinch with worry before sighing.“Vee is right, hijo. You aren’t getting better or at least at the rate you could be. But you can! We just need to find the way for it to happen. And well… we think companionship will help. Especially one that can help with daily life other than just emotional support.”She scoots her seat forward and leans towards him. He looks at the wall behind her.“And we’ve seen you get better and that was through companionship.”She raises her hand up and presses her hand gently against his chest.“Flapjack. Flapjack was your companion and he helped you get better, everyone saw that.”He looks down at his chest then looks up with his own eyes shining but he doesn't dare cry.“You are your happiest with animals. And a dog can help you.”Hunter doesn't doubt it will.Flapjack had been there for him to pet when he couldn't get his breathing at the proper pace. Flapjack was there to soothingly rub themself against his neck, drawing Hunter out of any dissociation he may have been going through. Flapjack was there to remind him to eat, drink and do basic hygiene when Hunter couldn’t care too. Flapjack was there to pull Hunter out of any panic attack, any nightmare. Flapjack was there to be his friend no matter what.The thought of a dog being there to do the same now brought excitement to him. But another part of him saw this as a way to replace Flapjack. Worse, to be downright disrespectful and cruel to Flapjack and his image. Plus, what was a dog to a palismen?He couldn't do that. He wouldn’t do that.“I’m not going to replace Flapjack.”“You aren’t going to replace Flapjack, cariño. Flapjack was your palismen. This is a service dog, different things. A service dog can’t turn into a staff and surly Flapjack couldn't bark.” She jokes light heartedly.He cracks a smile at that.“No but that would have been funny.” He giggled“It would have.” Her eyes squint in delight, before she clears her throat.“You wouldn’t be replacing Flapjack. Flapjack will forever be a part of you. A service dog will be there to help you and to love you. Just because you’ll have a new companion it doesn't mean you're forgetting or replacing the old one. It just means you're moving on. The grief will still be there but you're at a new stage of life. Plus, I think Flapjack would want you to get better. He would encourage you to get help even if it is from another companion, would he not?”“He would…”“Then that settles it, no? Of course you don’t have to get a service dog.” She quickly shoots a look at Vee who looks off to the side.“But we recommend it because we think it will help.” She looks back to him, her face kind and concerned.He looks at his plate. Empty. The table was messy with spilled rice and crumbs and there were plenty more on his lap and probably the floor.“...I’ll think about it.”
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“Mama and Vee think I should get a service dog.”It’s Monday noon. He sat near the end of a long blue lunch table of the Hexside cafeteria, sandwiched comfortably between Willow and Gus. In front of him sat his simple packed lunch of arroz y pollo which was neatly shredded for him and some electrolyte drink. He picked at the food ignoring the way his fingers trembled.He looked down at his lap, staring at the colors of his uniform. Yellow, he took advanced potions. It was easy to do when you didn’t have natural magic most of your life. If what Flapjack did to him was even natural of course. He didn’t have a bile sac, the healers said so. That it was the galdorstone which had been mutated. No longer a crystal blue, but a powerful yellow they had observed.His own artificial bile ‘sac.’Brown, for construction elements. The magic he found himself using the most outside of teleportation or energy blast. He remembers the powerful fists that escaped the ground below, made up of dirt, stone, or even the sea itself. The way he shook the ground below him, summoning spikes of rock, shifting the walls around him with a flick of a staff, and manipulating the sea, never once getting burned.It was a challenge learning to do this again on his own, without a staff at hand and instead the power inside of him. For a moment he hears chirping.Dark Blue, he’d seen plenty of healers in his life but none ever examined him thoroughly. After successful missions, he was healed with a simple circle spell. And like that, all the wounds were gone. He always felt shitty after those sped up healings. He can still hear them telling him to grab a replenishing potion on his way out. ‘Those check ups’ never lasted more than five minutes.He learned to heal himself with magic. Making wounds sew themselves back up, fade bruises, make potions for pain relief. Except for punishments, he wasn’t allowed to use magic for those, just a good ol’ med kit.The only time he can think he’d been thoroughly examined was when he’d been attacked by a venomous cave centipede when he was like twelve, that he attacked first. He had been on rest for a bit and ended up losing 10 pounds. His clothes fitted him loose for months after. He thanks mithridatism for surviving that incident.An assistant healer had taken note of his scars, and went to make a report for an emergency check up, he never saw her again. She’d been kind.Belos sometimes healed him but only if punishments got too fatal. He thinks back to the old scar on his cheek, hidden underneath the ones from the rot. The original wound went down to his throat. He remembers the feeling of choking on his blood, the taste, the panic and the world fading around him.Healers, despite healing, were sometimes mean. Or maybe those were the type of people the Emperor's coven just hired. Power hungry beings who liked stomping those below them, those in their care.Except the fact that the healers he saw a while back for check ups and physical therapy had been kind and professional, albeit difficult to find.If so, then why were his classmates the same? Sure he deserved it, he was the Golden Guard and he’s heard worse. Though they had the tendency to make him uncomfortable in his own skin as if he wasn’t already.‘Dude, look at his face!’‘Look at him, this guy doesn't know a thing about healing. Why isn’t he in the beginners class?’‘Can I examine you? It can get us extra credit!’Despite the fact he can sew wounds the neatest despite his shaky hands, or knew all sorts of enchantments for bandages, or all the bones in the body, his classmates thought he was stupid, or just pitiful. Worse was he didn't even share the same classes with Em or Viney.He ignored the lack of red of his uniform, he had been in bard for a bit but quit from being unable to play an instrument. His hands shook too much and he grew inpatient.No beast-keeping either, he couldn't bear the sight of all those beasts knowing he slaughtered dozens of them, simply because he was told too. Sometimes Puddles was enough to make him feel guilty considering the fair share of innocent griffins he’s killed in the past.It was fine, he could live with three tracks. Willow and Gus took it upon themselves to teach him plants and illusions more. Darius also was already teaching him abominations and he was already busy with learning to carve with Dell. The man had taught him ways to help cope with aching and shaking hands when carving. He thinks that the day of actually making a palismen isn't too far away and he actually finds himself somewhat excited to make up for that damage he’s caused. Even if he hasn’t actually visited Dell in a while.He avoided the gazes of the people and simply zoned off. In front of him were Luz, Amity, Ed, Em and Skara. Also on the same row as him was Matt who sat next to Gus and Viney who was next to Willow with Puddles laying at her feet. A full table yet a table filled surprisingly with people he grew to trust and love.“A service dog?! Awww hermano, I agree. I think one would suit you and be a great help.” Luz burst, breaking him out of the depths of his mind. Her eyes gleaming and she smiled happily at him. He looked up and noticed her eyebrows were pinched slightly, with some sort of worry he assumed that a lot of people carried for him.“I'm not sure what that entails but I agree with Luz.” Amity nodded“Amity agreeing with Luz, what a surprise.” Gus quipped unamused, ignoring a ‘hey!’ from her. “But yeah! I agree. From what I know, a dog would suit you.”“Hmm I think so too.” Willow says with a grin, nudging Hunter and forcing him to straighten up a bit.“Don’t mean to be mean but like, what are we agreeing on?” Ed interfered with a squint.“Yeah, what's a service dog? Is it like having a dog beast as your personal servant?” Em added.“Ok, ok so basically, a service dog is a trained animal that humans keep to help people who may have some disabilities by helping them do stuff. There are normal dogs which people keep as pets but these service dogs are like I said, trained to help and are only provided to those who qualify.” Luz explains, excitement in her voice.“Oh, kinda like Frewin!” Viney joins in.“Yeah! Like Frewin, except dogs don’t let you see but can help guide blind people.”“But you aren’t blind.” Matt interjects with an eyebrow raised.Before Hunter can speak, Luz comes in. “Service dogs don’t just help with blindness but all sorts of disabilities a person can have. Not just physical ones too.”“Oh so if you like, have health issues that affect daily tasks? There are some beasts that can do that actually! And palismen!” Ed says excitedly.Hunter cringes slightly at the last part. “Yeah, pretty much.”“And it works for Hunter because umm…that.” Luz’s defense for him quickly turns somewhat sad as she looks at his shaking hands. He has gloves on so the scars aren't visible but everyone knows they're there.He grimaces, mouth pulled into a straight line. “Physical therapy has been helping with that…” he weakly defends.“You haven’t even gone in like a month.” Luz sighs with an eye roll.“But if we have a beast from here that can help you, then why not get a beast here then a dog?” Amity questions, switching the conversation. Thank Titan.“Yeah, like Puddles!” Viney inserts, happy to talk about her griffin any time.“I don’t think Puddles counts as a service animal.” Luz says making a face as she watches the griffin lick up an insect she squashed from the floor.“So I would be able to have it both in the Human and Demon Realm.” Hunter explains.He’s thought over the subject over the weekend. It’s more likely for Demon Realm folk to take kindly to a Human Realm animal then the Human Realm taking kindly to a Demon Realm Beast. And maybe because some days he found himself avoiding Demon Realm related anything, except Vee of course.But how would the dog react to the Demon Realm?“Oh, so you would need it everywhere with you?” Em asks, her head tilting slightly.“Yeah I would need them in public spaces with me just in case of any public issues.” He explains, shoving his discomfort down.“Public issues?” Skara questions.“Ah, y'know… dissociation and panic attacks and all that...” He awkwardly explained, cringing while doing jazz hands as if that made anything better.Everyone else cringes as well, they've all become witness to his ugly mental problems one way or another.He thinks back to the dissociation episode he had at school, or at least the one that he believes mama and Vee had been discussing.‘Too many people are aware of how messed up you are. Do you like disturbing them? Feel the need to interrupt the peace and you're not even the Golden Guard anymore?’ He thought bitterly.“Well it's your choice right? If you want one and could get one, then you should get one! I could see you with a dog.” Willow, grabbing his hand, said, bringing Hunter out of his thoughts. He looks at her and she’s smiling reassuringly at him. His cheeks warm up and he cracks a small smile. He turns back to the rest of the table. He looked at her primary green uniform. Her sleeves were blue.‘We share a healing class.’ He remembers, the resentment of earlier fading.‘It's easy to forget the good.’ He remembers Mama telling him.“Well if I do get one then I’d need to give it exposure to the Demon Realm.” He looks over at Viney. “Viney, would you be able to help with getting the hypothetical dog used to the Demon Realm?”“Of course!” She salutes playfully. “It’ll be fun training this hypothetical Human Realm beast for a change!”“Aww. Why can’t I be the one to help the hypothetical dog beast?” Ed whined.“Yeahhhh, ‘hypothetical.’” Luz says sarcastically, looking at Hunter with a sly expression.“Wait what type of dog will it be? I'm pretty sure there's different types!” Gus interrupted.“Oh yeah! There has to be service types, right? I don’t think the chihuahua ones would be able to perform much service.” Amity says.“Actually I think any dog could be a service dog as long as they are trained, though there are some dogs more common than others like labs, poodles, golden retrievers and a bunch of others.” Luz explains.“Oooo a dog made of gold. Might need to get one.” Matt joked“Ok, now I need to see these dogs.” Ed says, uncharacteristically serious,Hunter laughs, happily listening to his friends chatter.…... It's dinner time again and he’s at the table, he won't be going back to school tomorrow, not until wednesday.Mama made enchiladas verdes con pollo. Mama and Vee chatted happily with each other. Vee had signed up for softball and spoke excitedly about the practices and the planned hangouts with her teammates. He sometimes envied how social and happy she could be despite having a life similar to his.‘I found my own coping methods like hanging out with friends and doing social activities. We all have our coping methods but you don’t.’Would this dog be his ticket to his road of recovery?He thinks of soft red feathers keeping him calm. Soft cooing to calm his breathing. He could vividly feel the gentle beak tapping his hand.He imagines warm fur against his skin and clothes. Soft pants contrasting with his gasping breaths. A wet nose pressing against the top of his hand.‘Yes’, he thinks, a companion, a service dog would help.He’s learned the differences between emotional support and service and while an emotional support may help his mental needs, they couldn’t help his physical ones.“How about you mijo?”“It was good, we learned some venom and poison antidotes in healing which I already know a lot about. Lunch was also good.”“Hmm sounds exciting, was this a paper assignment or something practical?” She asked, ignoring the potentially traumatic part.“There was a paper assignment which was just matching antidotes to the poisons or venoms. Then you had to make an antidote with a partner for one. I worked with Willow on a spiky dayshade. They are one of the few plants with venom rather than poison. It was pretty similar to potions class actually.”“It's wonderful you have her in that class, anything else?” She’s heard him rant about the other kids in his class, the way they treated him like some aggressive specimen to be probed or avoided. Vee had gotten particularly vicious at this, expressing desire to show his classmates what would happen if they continued to treat her hermano as she put it, ‘an experiment.’Camila herself had gotten upset at this and had Eda file a complaint at the school. The students had gotten off his back a little but that didn’t change the way they acted around him, just made them more sneaky if anything. Though it’s been way more tolerable for him after Willow joined the class.“Well, at lunch we talked about the service dog…”That quickly caught her and Vee’s attention.“Oh, well what happened?” Vee asked slyly, leaning towards him.“Oh just telling them what a service dog was…and what a Human Realm dog is in general.”“That’s it?”“Well no, I told them that you guys think I should get one.”“Did they agree?” Mama asks.“Yeah actually, and maybe… I think one would help me too.”There's a small moment of silence.“Yes! Finally! Ok mama, we're going to have to make an appointment with the psychiatrist pronto!”“Don’t be in a hurry now, Vee.” She laughed. “What made you change your mind, mijo?”“I’ve been thinking about it and you're right.” He looks at them“When I had Flapjack, I was getting better, feeling happier. After that night I feel like a part of me is getting worse. I wasn't happy in therapy and socially worse. I want this companion to be there for me like how Flapjack was…I don’t think I can handle a palismen right now and dogs are cool.”“They are cool.” Vee agrees, shifting into a terrier briefly, nodding. Hunter scoffs with a smile at her antics.Mama puts her hand on top of Vee's now furry head. “Ok, we’ll need to be able to make some confirmations, get documentation then apply to get one that suits your needs. Also all the supplies we’ll have to get.”Hunter nodded, “I've been doing research!”Camila looks at him fondly, she knew Hunter would go above and beyond for his dog the same way he did for Flapjack. She didn’t have a single doubt about it.“Ok then Mijo, I’ll have some papers made for you like we did for Vee.”He remembers that, creating fake papers and an identity for Vee so she’d be able to go to school as herself rather than Luz. Who knew Eda was actually good at paperwork. Even getting officially married is Las Vegas once!Vee reverted back to her basilisk form. “Yay! Identify forgery!”Hunter grinned widely, showing off his gap.He was getting a dog!
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“Hi, I would like to make an appointment with Dr, Flores for a physical and to get a referral to the psychiatrist for my son, Hunter Noceda.”It’s Monday again, a week had passed by and Hunter and mama made the preparation they needed to get him to the Doctor’s.Hunter sat on the couch ignoring the way the name made his heart flutter, instead focussing on fiddling with some multi-colored yarn and a crochet hook.He’d sometimes wondered why she decided to take him in. Other people had offered like Darius and even Eda and Raine but mama practically fought to have him stay with her. He was glad in the end, she was one of the few adults to show nothing but kindness towards him and he did feel genuinely loved by her.But he can’t help but feel that deep down inside, she regrets it. He makes her life more difficult than it needs to be. It would be so much easier for her if she’d never opened her arms towards him.He can’t help but think of words that must have been said to her dozens of times.‘Mrs. Noceda, may you pick up your son, Hunter? He was caught missing his classes.’‘Camila? Hunter is having a panic attack again but he isn’t calming down. We don’t know what do.’‘Mama? Hunter is having a nightmare, he won’t stop screaming.’He growled under his breath and tried forcing himself to think about other things. He does not need to think about how pathetic he is, he already lives in this fleshy prison. He pushes through with his project, ignoring the shakiness of his hand.Vee was at a sleepover at Mashas with some other of her friends and Luz was at the Demon Realm, spending time with the Blights.Mama was in the kitchen making a phone call with the clinic. Right now though, he was trying to stay focused on his project. He’d been trying to be in a lighter mood lately despite the fact that the most anxiety-inducing things are yet to come.He was going to a Human realm doctor.Vee had already done it. The school had required a physical examination to be done before she would enter. It was now on her paperwork or on her new medical record. It was a fake identity but he supposed it's as real as ever now considering she actually had her own debit card and medical history now. LIke a real human.It's funny how despite being blue-printed from a literal human, a shapeshifting demon had proved herself to be more human than him to the eyes of the world. She’d managed to fool the doctors and would continue to as long as she never allowed an overly invasive procedure to happen to her.So logically it should be the same for him, just walk into the medical office, get a basic check up, get a referral, visit the psychiatrist, then visit the center where they had the service dogs, and then get his dog.Easy.Objectively, it shouldn't be too hard, he's done spy missions in the past, used illusions to paint himself as someone or something he's not. All he needed was a mental script and he was good.So why in Titans name was he so nervous?!“No he hasn’t been to this clinic before, I've only recently adopted him.”Mama had already explained what was going to happen. He would see the doctor, they would record his height and weight, check his vital signs, ask some questions, get his referral and boom, he was done!He's been to the healers before and they’d been way more invasive!“Yes, Dr. Flores, she’s seen both my daughters already, Luz and Vee Noceda.”He now had his own official Human Realm identity and medical record filled out to make it seem like he’s received care for his scars and other basic things like any previous medical checkups. So just grabbing all the information from his Boiling isles healing chart, and placed it in this medical human one.He never thought he would ever thank anyone for being sketchy as fuck but he thanks the Titan-sent known as, Eda Clawthorne, The Owl Lady.“The referral is to receive a note that allows my son to receive a service dog for his disabilities.”His ears pinned down and looked down at his work. It was sloppy and the yarn was loose. He’d just wanted to make a hat for Stringbean like he’s done for flapjack and the other palismen in the past.“Oh really? Ok, we’ll still have the check up but I’ll speak to my son to see what he thinks.”He tried to ignore the conversation. It was mama’s and the receptionist’s phone call, not his and theirs. Though he knew if he didn’t want to hear this conversation he would go to the basement and not be on the living room couch.What can he say, he was a chismoso at heart like his sisters.Or GaldorstoneShit! Would the doctors know? The healers said his heart beated like a normal witch but humans had technology! Would they see that his anatomy was off!?What about the sleeper stone lungs?!No!They’d seen Vee and didn’t suspect a thing, he’d be fine! He just needed to relax.But Vee had an actual heart and organ system that matched her! Not the sewn up miscellaneous parts he was!“Yes, March 18th 9:00 am works for me. Ok thank you. Goodbye”She hung up.He forced his shoulder to untense. Mama walked out the kitchen and into the living room and immediately placed her attention on him. Her eyes lit up and she approached, sitting next to him on the couch, her posture more straight than usual.”Hey mijo.”He turned to face her a bit quicker than he meant too and placed his crocheting supplies down, giving her all his attention.”So I'm sure youve heard, I just got off the phone with the clinic.” She pauses and observes him for a moment, letting the information sink in. He flushes slightly at the call out but nods, motioning her to continue.”I just want to let you know, it's just going to be a check up. They aren't going to do anything that shows you aren't from here, ok? No hay necesidad de estar preocupado, si?”Another pause, she’s waiting for him to say something but he can't bring himself to form any words. She takes it as a que to keep going.”The clinic also let me know that you don't need to visit the psychiatrist or any other mental health provider to get the note for a service dog, that your primary care physician can do that for you.”Another pause, she continues.“Your physician will be Dr. Flores, she's also Luz’s and Vee’s main doctor. She´ll be able to give you the note.”Finally, he speaks. ”I won't have to see a mental health provider?””Well that's up to you, a psychiatrist could help with any mental health treatments.”He nods a bit, ”Ok, I want to see what Dr.Flores thinks. I've already seen mental healers in the Boiling iles.””Ok, that's a good choice.”He is no longer making eye contact with her, choosing to turn his head and look at the ground.‘Why must he be so difficult?’Before he got the chance to spiral, a gentle hand caresses his scarred cheek, it’s the left side of his face and he doesn't have much sensation there anymore. Still, he can faintly feel the pressure and warmth.“Mijo…”He turned his head to face her, his growing hair going against his face. She scoots closer towards him and gently brushes it away with her other hand. She moves her hands to gently garb the sides of his arms but never his shoulders.“I already know what you're thinking and you gotta stop that.” She offers a small smile and pokes the middle of his forehead gently.“I know you think you're ‘too much’ or that you don’t deserve help but that's just not true,hijo.” She gives him a sad look and he can’t help but feel a pang of guilt.“You've been through so much Mijo, more than any person should. It’s only natural that there's going to be a lot of healing. And no one said healing was easy.” That gets a dry chuckle out of him. He glances over at her, she grins at him but shifts her expression into something more calmer. He looks away again“But just because it's not easy doesn’t mean it’s tiresome for me or that you're undeserving of it. You deserve so much more than you know.” Her hand is on his cheek again, on his right one. The scar is smaller and he can actually feel her hand against it. She gently rubs her thumb on his cheek and he leans in to it.He sighs. “It’s just that…It’s just that it feels like there's something new that's wrong with me everyday. Like nothing is getting better.”He looks up at her. “I'm not the only one that’s suffered but everyone else is doing so much better than me. It’s em-embarrassing going out then having some sort of freakout in front of everyone!” His voice breaks but he refuses to cry.Mama opens her mouth to say something but he cuts her off.“On top of that my stupid body doesn't work. I used to be able to fight witches and demons three times my size and now I can't even hold a dumb fork!He sniffs but he doesn't cry.“How can you say I’m not a burden when I can’t do anything on my own anymore? You were constantly having to take me to the healers to the Demon Realm and now the Human realm doctors? I know it’s for a dog but even needing one still proves im a burden, no? And now some poor dog’s got to deal with me”She looks at him, her expression pained and he wonders if he went too far. Usually when he went too far with Belos that resulted in being hit, he knows she isn’t going to but somehow hurting his mama emotionally feels worse.“I-I’m sorr-”“No! No mijo, don’t you dare apologize. I’m so sorry you were in this much pain and I couldn't do anything about it sooner. You have every right to feel this way but what you are saying about yourself just isn’t true.”She wraps her arms around him and pulls him to a hug. Despite now being a few inches taller than her he couldn't help but feel small in her arms. He melted into her embrace and tightly gripped on to her warm orange sweater.A few tears escaped from his eyes and dammit he was crying.She rocks him gently and his face is buried against her collar bone. They stay like that for a bit before she speaks.“I’m sorry if this is too much but…you remember when I brought you that book of abuse?”He lets out a wet laugh, muffled by her sweater.“How can I forget..”“And how before you would say things about your past like they were normal when really they weren’t?”“Yeah…? What does that have to do with anything?” He removes his face and looks up at her.“After you got that book you were able to slowly but surely know that what happened to you was wrong. That’s healing Mijo. It's painful and slow but worth it in the end because now you know that what Belos did was bad, that how the adults used to treat you wasn't ok. If you aren't making any progress than that would mean you still think what Belos did was okay and that all parents should be that way”“But I was still in denial?”“Not anymore.”That gets him quiet.“You see? It took time but that doesn't mean it’s too much. You're such a good boy, mi cariño.”She sighs and sinks into the couch, pulling Hunter with her.“Bebé, healing for what you've been through is going to take awhile and will still be with you even as you get older. I lost Manny years ago but that doesn't mean the pain isn't still there or coping with my grief was easy. I was lost for a long time. That doesn't make me a burden, does it?”“No of course not!”“Then it's the same for you, you lost Flapjack, you were hurt your whole life, gained scars…You have so much hurt inside of you but you can get better, it just takes time. And you're already so many steps ahead! These doctors appointments, mental health treatments are only stepping stones for your path of recovery. And your recovery will never, ever be a burden on me.”He simply chokes out a sob against her sweater and she gently shushes him. One arm around him and the other genty running against his wavy blonde hair.“Your hair is getting long, cariño. Would you like me to cut it tomorrow?”He nods, still crying. She lets him.“Hmm, this dog will do you good. I'm sure the Doctor will write the note. She might even give us some other recommendations on what else can help you. Trial and error.”He doesn't reply but he’s calming down.“Hope the dog has a cute name, like fluffy or cupcake. I'm not sure if I can take a dog named McKenzie or Jason seriously.”He laughs and looks up at her, his eyes still wet and finally replies.“One of my classmates has a palismen named Michael.”“Really? Not even Mikey or something?“Nope. I could never give a palismen such a serious name, only cute names.”“Like Flapjack?”“I didn’t name him, Caleb did. I think he would agree with us.”“Hmm, wise man.”They settled down, Hunter laying against her and relaxing, soaking up each other's presence. He closes his eyes which ache from the crying. He nuzzles into her warmth, trying to ignore the colding damp spot he was laying against.“Your sweater is wet.”“Hmm wonder why.”He smiles cheekily at her and she just rubs her hand through his hair playfully. His arm trembled and she moved her hand to gently rub it.They stay like that for a bit in silence, mama massaging is trembling muscles, knowing there isn’t much she could do for it.“I should probably head to bed.”Mama sighs, “Me too. You should probably shower though, sweaty.”He scoffs jokingly. “Rude.”She leans down and kisses him on top of his head, squeezing him gently. He returns it and hugs her back.“Buenas noches cariño. Remember, your never too much”“Buenas noches mamá…Thank you”He gets up, leaving her warmth and stretches. He bids her goodnight again and descends down the basement.Camila sighs before getting up from the couch and heads to her room, unfazed by her tear and snot filled sweater. It’s far from the first time and definitely not the last time.Hunter returns back upstairs and heads straight towards the bathroom, holding his set of pajamas and undergarments.He enters the bathroom and flicks the light on. He hangs his clothes up, turns on the shower and begins stripping and shoving his clothes in the clothing basket. He rolls his eyes at the realization that he’ll have to do laundry soon. Lame.Just as he’s about to step in he looks at the mirror, he stares at the painful scars that paint his skin. They are pink, thick and rough in texture and so painfully uncomfortable. His hair reaches his shoulders now despite cutting it less than two months ago. His eyebags are big as ever though his dark circles are not as dark as they used to be.‘Recovery takes time.”He exhales and steps into the shower.Hunter soon left the shower feeling better, as he changed he continued staring at his body, trying to see what changed. Besides his new scars covering up a bunch of old ones, he notes that his bones no longer jut out of his skin. He now has a healthy layer of fat. He raises his arms and notes that his muscles look like actual muscles and not dehydrated lumps attached to his bone under the skin.His skin wasn’t as pale as before now that he's more exposed to the sun, or at least his face is. He tends to wear long sleeves and pants but he notes the little sun freckles on his face and neck. They aren't too noticeable but they're still there. Willow called them cute.He brushed his hair and it was no longer as brittle or dull as it was before, now it was soft and dare he say even shiny? He brushes his teeth and not for a while he doesn't quite hate himself. That doesn't mean he quite loves everything right now but it’s not like he can't stand to look at the mirror like before.He still scoffs when he gets toothpaste splatter all around the sink from his hand shaking from the work of washing. He rinses it away.He scrubs his hair with a towel and stares into his brown eyes. He also found himself hating them less. Mama had reassured him he didn’t steal Flapjack’s eyes but rather they were given to him. That he didn’t rob his palismen of his soul but rather it was a gift to keep on living.His body didn't ache much right now and he thanks that to the hot water of the shower,He exits the bathroom and turns off the light. He makes his way down the basement and under the covers of his bed.‘In less than a week, he will get his note.’He shuts his eyes but doesn't fall asleep but instead thinks about red feathers and warm fur, and in those rare moments,he slowly dozes off to rest. Blaming his crying session for getting him so tired.