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“Robin! Another one’s here!” Some kid in a straw hat was yelling right next to you, causing you to wince. You had a massive headache, you hadn’t felt this hungover since…wait. You didn’t drink anymore. You opened your eyes to a sunny day on…a wood boat? You were definitely sailing on open water. Maybe the ocean since you smelled salt… What kind of dream was this? Sure, you had anxiety dreams of drowning but nothing so pleasant . A disembodied hand grabbed your ankle and held on tightly. It startled you but since this was a dream there was no need to worry. You were kind of enjoying the sun and the water, so what was a hand (with beautiful nail beds, but dry cuticles) going to do? You turned your head to find a black haired boy staring at you inches from your face. “Gah! Don’t do that!” you said to the boy. He grinned at you and laughed. “Shishishishi, it’s me! Luffy! You made it!”  “Made it where?” Were you supposed to know who he was? “To the Going Merry! You’re our twentieth reader -” “Twenty third,” said another guy you hadn’t seen. This one was napping against the mast, talking with eyes still closed. He had luscious green hair that you’d want to check out later. You didn’t see any roots showing so either he had dyed it recently or…oh wait you were in a conversation. “Sounds good, Loogie. I’m not quite following what’s happening.” This was the most complex dream you’d ever had. You’d never been able to interact like this before in a dream. It all felt like real life. You started to wonder if maybe something else was going on. “Shishishi it’s LUFFY! But you know that! So what was the last thing you read?” The boy was still sitting incredibly close to you and practically vibrating with energy.  “Um, I read a biography of Catherine the Great. Why?” Luffy tilted his head at your words. “Is she in Egghead or Wano?”  “Um, in Russia? I don’t think she’d be called an egghead though.” The green haired guy huffed and got up. “Gonna be a difficult one. Robin can figure it out. Nappin’ on the other side of the deck,” he said to Luffy, walking away. He looked like he was flexing his back as you watched him retreat. His three swords clacked against each other, making you wonder how practical it was to have so many. “No, she’s gonna be a great reader!” Luffy smiled at you again. You smiled back, but were very confused. The hand gripping your ankle was still there holding on tight. A breathtakingly beautiful woman with black hair, looking to be growing out some bangs, was walking towards you with her arms crossed in front of her. Even though she exuded radiance, her intense blue eyes pinned you with a stare. She sat down in front of you, keeping her arms crossed. “Hello,” you said. Might as well be polite in dreamland. “Hi,” the woman said smiling. “I’m Robin. What’s your name?” Long ago, you were tired of baristas messing up your name (even though it wasn’t hard!). So when someone asked for your name, you supplied their own back to them. It usually worked out ok, and gave room for some awkward chit chat while you waited for your coffee. “Isn’t that funny? My name is also Robin.” The woman quirked an eyebrow but kept her smile and nodded. “Shishishishi two Robins! But what can we call you then? It’s too confusing having two Robins on board.” Luffy rubbed his chin in thought.  “Interesting thought, Captain. For now, I have a prepared document I’d like you to read. It should answer the most common questions we get asked by Readers.” The woman handed you a scroll. What in the medieval ages was this? “Robin TWO!” Luffy said, snapping his fingers. You untied the scroll. Might as well see what it said. “I don’t think Robin 2 is a flattering name,” Robin told Luffy. “Let’s think of other ideas. In the meantime, let Robin read.” The hand patted your ankle. “It’s best if I keep a hold of you until the shock wears off. Saves a lot of time chasing people down.” She kept a hold of you? Whatever. Looking at the scroll, you saw an elegantly handwritten list. ~~~
Frequently Asked Questions - for Readers
  
Where am I?

You are on board the Going Merry . Franky has modified it so it does not bear complete resemblance to the original ship but it is also not the 1,000 Sunny .

Is this real?

Quite real. This world is as real to us as yours was to you. This is not a dream, hallucination, or simulation.

Am I dead?

We are not sure. It seems to be likely based on the anecdotes of previous Readers. However, there is no way to know conclusively.

Why was I brought here?

We do not know the criteria under which Readers are brought to our world. We believe it has to do with your intense love of “One Piece.”

What happened to my belongings?

It seems whatever you had last in your world is what came here, with a few exceptions. Cell phones, laptops, and other electronics never make it to our world. We have your belongings on the ship, if you would like to have them.

What will happen to me? Can I stay on the ship?

Readers have stayed in our world for 21 days, after which they disappear. We do not know what happens afterward. During your 21 days, you will remain with us on the ship. You may stay in the men’s quarters.

Is there a way to get back to my world?

Not that we know of. We are unsure if you are transported there once again when you disappear.

Are there other readers?

There is only ever one Reader in our world at a time. The Strawhat Pirates have had the most Readers, though the Heart Pirates and Whitebeard Pirates have had a few as well.

What arc are we on?

The “timeline” that you know has been completely abandoned. With so much additional information and insight into future events, the events of this world have been drastically changed. We are not in recognizable “arcs” any longer.

What about Ace? Thatch? Whitebeard? Corazon? Sabo?

Thanks to the information supplied by Readers, Ace, Thatch and Whitebeard are all alive. Yamato has joined the Whitebeard crew with Ace. We had a time traveling Reader who saved Cora-san. Sabo has been made aware of Ace and Luffy and they have already reunited.

Can I fight?
In our experience, Readers are quite weak and unable to fight. If you wish to try, you must first defeat Usopp in an arm wrestling contest.
 
Note: Please do not bring up our individual histories. We experienced them as real people and do not appreciate discussing them. Thank you.
 ~~~ You finished reading the scroll and re-rolled it. It addressed some of your concerns, but also had a lot of information you didn’t know what to do with. You handed the scroll back to Robin. “You should call this the ‘Handbook for the Recently Deceased,” you told the raven haired beauty. You still had your sense of humor even when dead, it turned out. Er, maybe dead. “That is quite an excellent suggestion, I think I shall,” Robin nodded solemnly and took the scroll with another arm sprouting from her own. You’d ask her about that later.  “What questions do you still have?” Robin asked kindly. “Why do I have to stay in the men’s quarters?”  “Oh, that is not applicable to you. Nearly all of our Readers have been men, usually Torao has the female Readers. You can join Nami and myself in the women’s quarters.”  “I’m dead then, huh?” You couldn’t wrap your head around the idea, especially when you felt so alive.  “Robin B!” Luffy shouted from a few feet away. He still hadn’t given up on a nickname for you. “No, Luffy, I don’t care for that,” Robin said calmly. “That would make me Robin A, which I am not. And yes, you are likely dead.”  “That’s a bummer.” You’d think about that and deal with your feelings later, this was all too weird to believe right now. You fiddled with the necklace you were wearing. None of this felt real at all. Besides, one of your best traits as a person was your ability to roll with things. You had always been pretty open to change, though this change was…drastic. “Interesting - few readers express that emotion upon arriving in our world. Readers are usually thrilled to be here with us.” Robin looked like she wanted to study you in a lab. “Um, so what’s a Reader? Or a One Piece?” You might as well learn while you were here for the next few weeks.  “You don’t have to be afraid,” Robin said, the hand patting your ankle. “We aren’t going to harm you for your information. We’ve probably heard it all already. We know that we’re a comic and a show in your world. You’re not in danger.” You hadn’t considered that you might be in danger, but you were thinking about it now. “TWO Robin!” Luffy yelled from across the deck. He’d been pacing and trying to think of a good nickname this whole time. “Luffy, that is the worst suggestion yet.” Robin frowned.  “Aw, you don’t like any of ‘em! This is frustrating. Maybe we can just call her Mystery Reader !”  “Not every reader is a Mystery Reader, Luffy. You can’t say that for -” Robin was chastising Luffy. “Myst is fine. Short for Mystery.” You didn’t really care what they called you since, you know, you’d be going to the afterlife in about three weeks. “ Shishishishishi I knew you’d be a good reader, Misty!” Luffy stretched his arms from where he stood to wrap them around you. Misty, sure. That was similar to what you said. What the…was this kid rubber? Add one more weird thing to the pile, why not?  “What other questions do you have?” You were gonna put your cards on the table. “Listen Robin, I’ll be honest, I didn’t get a lot out of your handbook. I don’t know any of those people, or any of you, or what this show is. I don’t know why I’m here, I have no information to give you. I watch documentaries and sometimes HGTV. This is like a new employee orientation for a job I didn’t apply to. ” Robin nodded sagely. “I quite like that phrase - new employee orientation. Perhaps more of a ‘new reader orientation.’ In any event, you’re here with us now, whether you know any information or not. I am going to release you, and you can get settled in.” The hand holding on to you vanished as you watched.  “Cool party trick.”  “Yes, they are very useful, though not always appreciated at parties.” Robin stood up and you did the same. You stretched your legs and back as you’d been sitting for a while. Robin was a tall drink of water, you thought. You were average height, nothing crazy. But she was statuesque and slim, making you think of your own body. Sure, you had some self confidence, but as you approached closer to middle age, things didn’t look quite the same as they once did. And Robin looked like a supermodel, graceful and elegant. “Do I hear the sweet voice of a lovely Mellorine?” said a handsome waiter, holding a glass of water on a tray. He was practically swooning and you’d never met before. A little strange, but maybe he was just enthusiastic. Robin looked at the waiter, who was wearing a three piece suit. “This is Sanji, our chef. He is also one of the Wings to the Captain.”  “Oh, sweet Mellorine -”  “Wait, who is the Captain?” You cut off Sanji, you realized you didn’t know who was running this show. Sanji’s expression showed surprise. He looked at Robin for clarification, pausing in moving the tray your way to your dismay. You really wanted that water. “Misty, as Captain calls her, does not know anything about our world. We will all have to introduce ourselves.”  “Wait, does that mean Luffy is -” “The Captain,” answered Robin and Sanji simultaneously. That kid?! The one who suggested they call you “Two Robin”? You didn’t say anything so as not to insult their captain or whatever but the kid didn’t look like he could be older than 18. Not your circus, not your monkey. As long as the ship didn’t sink in the next three weeks, it didn’t really matter to you. “Right, right. That seems…good. Um, Sanji, is that water for me? I’d really appreciate it.” Sanji looked like you’d asked him to senior prom. “Oh, dear, sweet, beautiful Misty, it would be an honor to serve you this water.” He bowed to you with a flourish. Alright, time to nip this in the bud. “Look kid, I’m old enough to be your mother. Cut it out. But thank you for the water.” He deflated a little but not for long.  “Like wine, most women only get better with age,” he said with a charming smile. “As Robin mentioned, I am Sanji, the chef on our crew. Do you have any dietary restrictions?”  “Oh, I’ll eat anything you make.”  “Is that so? Truly, no restrictions? Preferences? Allergies?” For all his attempted flirting before, he seemed serious right now.  “Well, truthfully, I’m vegetarian. So, no meat.” Sanji nodded, smiling once again. “Not a problem. Do you eat fish?” “Ah, no. No animals.” You saw a rubber arm going past you as Luffy rocketed himself to your side. Rubber had its uses it seemed. “You don’t eat meat?!” Luffy yelled into your face, completely incredulous. “Nope, haven’t in over 20 years.” You moved your head back away from his. Kid didn’t have much need for personal space. “What do you eat then!?” It was like the kid couldn’t wrap his head around the idea of not eating meat. You shrugged. You’d had this conversation in various forms many, many times before. “Vegetables, fruit, grains, legumes, things like that.” Luffy furrowed his brow in thought for a moment before it cleared into a bright smile. “SANJI - can I have Misty’s portion of meat??”  “No! If she doesn’t eat it, I’m not going to make more than usual.” “But she’s our reader, you have to make her a portion! Then I can have it.”  “But if she won’t eat it, I won’t make an extra portion,” Sanji already looked exasperated. “But I want it!” Luffy was on the verge of a tantrum, you thought. “No! You already eat all the food! Besides, if she doesn’t eat meat… ” The two of them seemed to be entering into an argument about meat rations, so you’d bow out of this conversation. It was only getting louder as they argued in circles.  You drank your water and took a look around you for the first time. The ship seemed pleasant, though not very modern. There weren’t any electrical outlets or lights, and not much metal either. It was powered by wind, as you saw the giant sails. Maybe there wasn’t electricity here? You’d ask Robin later. Your eyes wandered up and you saw a giant jolly roger flag, the skeleton wearing a hat. “So this is a pirate ship, huh?” The fighting made a little more sense now. Not that you wanted to. You’d let them handle that part of the afterlife. It made you a little nervous and you fidgeted with your necklace. A handsome young man wearing overalls and goggles locked eyes with you while holding your hair dryer. The next thing you noticed was that he had the most beautiful, long, luscious natural coils you’d ever seen in your life. It took everything in you not to ask him his wash day routine before you exchanged names. “Hey! That’s mine!” you yelled at him. You were protective of your tools, they were like your babies. The man looked scared for a moment, then apologetic.  “Sorry, I just got excited. I’ve never seen a machine like this before. What does it do?” He was turning it over in his hands, looking at the barrel. He was holding it like a precious treasure, touching it with care. At least he could appreciate machinery. “It’s a hairdryer.” Your guess that they didn’t have electricity seemed to have more merit now. Which meant he air dried all that hair every time? Coily King.  “Interesting! How does it work? Obviously the electricity feeds through the cord, other readers have had corded things before -” “Usopp! Where’s the new reader? I wanna see if they have pens!” An unbelievably sexy young woman wearing a tiny string bikini came up from below deck, her bright orange hair blowing in the breeze. Was every person on this ship attractive? How did her boobs defy gravity like that? You looked down at your own, hopeful that whatever force was keeping hers up might be helping yours. No dice.  “Hi, I’m the new reader?” You extended your hand, which she shook. The woman smiled back at you. “I’m Nami, Robin told me you don’t know anything about our world. So, the way it works here is that everyone pays a daily fee to stay on the boat. It’s 100 Beri a day. That’s how we afford to maintain the ship in tip top condition.” You could smell bullshit a mile away - you’d been working customer service jobs on and off for decades. You decided to play along to see what happened. “Oh, of course. But how will I get money? I guess I’ll have to sell some of my belongings…” You pursed your lips for dramatic effect. “I know! I have some pens, I could sell those for…what was it you said? 1,000 Beri each?” Nami smiled even wider, a classic mistake.  “Well, what’s money among friends? And besides, it’s not like you can take anything back with you. We have a lot of reader stuff left on the ship.” You paused, pretending to consider for a moment.  “Hmm. You’re right. Maybe I’ll just drop them all in the sea. Y’know, like a, funeral. Since, I guess mine’s already happening. Maybe.” You didn’t want to think about your funeral, it had been a nightmare to figure everything out when your dad died. You felt bad for whoever was arranging it, probably your sister. You were zoned out thinking for a moment, and snapped back when Nami said something. “I’m sorry, I missed that. What did you ask me?” “What kind of pens do you have?” Nami had taken the bait, hook line and sinker. You doubled down. “I’d be willing to show them to you, for a price.” She raised an eyebrow, then broke it with a sincere smile. “Welcome aboard! I’m the navigator for the crew, it’s nice to meet you. You’ll be staying with me and Robin, I hope you’ll have a fun time with us. Now about those pens…” You smiled at her introduction. “Thank you, and I’d be glad to show you what I have. I’ve always got at least a couple on me. Where’s my stuff? We can see what’s there.”  “Follow me, it’s probably in the crows nest. That’s where reader stuff usually appears.” She started walking toward a ladder that led up to a platform high in the sky. High, high in the sky.  “Hell no!” you exclaimed. “I’m not going up there!” Usopp and Nami looked askance at each other. “Why not?” asked Usopp, still holding the hair dryer like it was a puppy he was cuddling. “I’m afraid of heights.” Not that unusual of a fear, you didn’t even like diving off the 3 meter diving board at the pool. They looked at each other again. You felt like you were in middle school again, asking to sit at the cool kids table.  “That’s OK, I’ll go get it for you.” Usopp handed you the hairdryer and climbed the ladder. Nice, you got to sit with them. Score one for you.  ~~~  The last thing you remembered from your regular life was walking home from work, rolling your train case with you. You always took everything home with you, even though you trusted the salon you were working for. Force of habit after so many years. You didn’t remember anything after that, though it would be ironic if you got hit by a car.  Usopp kindly carried your things down from the crows nest. It was weird seeing your train case and purse on a wooden pirate ship, like when you saw a Timex in a historical movie. You heard a distant crash and looked over. The green haired guy was fighting Sanji, both of them looked pretty angry. The green haired guy was using his three swords against Sanji’s kicking? Must have strong legs. Maybe all the fighting was with each other. Nami and Usopp didn’t even look up. “Ooh, what’s in here? Treasure? I’ve never seen something like this before. Most readers have backpacks or purses.” Nami was eyeing your train case greedily. “No, it’s for my haircutting tools, makeup, manicure supplies, things like that.” You’d been an esthetician for a long time, though you’d done other jobs here and there. Nami threaded her fingers together in delight. “You’re a hairdresser?! And you do nails?! Big sister, you’re the best reader yet! Most of our readers are in eye-tea. Would you cut my hair?” Oh, she meant IT. Information technology. Made sense, lots of people worked in IT. You’d never really gotten all that good at computers, so that wasn’t something you’d ever pursued. “I mean, yeah, we can talk about that.” Even in the afterlife, everyone wanted a haircut when they found out you were a hairdresser. “Speaking of, Usopp, you have the most beautiful hair I’ve ever seen.” Usopp looked flustered, like he wasn’t used to compliments. That surprised you, he was clearly smart, well muscled, helpful…if you were 20 years younger you’d have been all over him. Or maybe even 10. But he looked like he couldn’t be older than 20 and that really didn’t do it for you. You liked your men with their prefrontal cortex fully developed. Besides, you hadn’t dated for a long time. In fact, aside from Robin, everyone looked really young. You wondered if there were any other older people on board. Even Robin looked like she couldn’t have been older than 35 at the most. “So, what do you do here?” It seemed like everyone had a specific job on board, might as well find out.  “Well, I’m the great Captain Usopp, and I am one of the bravest and most notorious pirates on the seas. I’ve defeated -” “Wait, I thought Luffy was the Captain.” Usopp’s train of thought was paused. “Oh, he’s the Captain of this crew because I felt bad for him after I single handedly defeated a pirate fleet of 5,000 men. It was easy too, let me tell you the story…” Usopp went off on a long tale about his (obviously fake) adventures on the seas. But he was funny and entertaining and a really good story teller. You touched his arm to pause his story as he was explaining how he defeated a giant with a flaming sword. “Listen, Usopp, if you ever want, I’ll style your hair for you. Braid out, cornrows, twist out, whatever you want.” You wished you could take a before and after picture for your business Insta, but based on what Robin had told you, your phone hadn’t made it through the…portal? Er, however you got here. You didn’t offer a fade or anything that would have you cut it - it was too gorgeous to cut.  “Hmm, maybe I’ll take you up on that - I’ve been wanting a new look recently,” Usopp mused. Nami was pouting, you didn’t want to upset her. “Same for you, uh, little sister, I’d gladly style your beautiful orange hair. I’ve never seen a shade like it.” You hadn’t, it was like the shade of an actual orange. Nami was appeased. “Thank you Big Sis, I’d love to do something with all this.” It looked like she was growing out a bob, and it was in that awkward transition stage. You could help style it a little better, whoever had been cutting it did a good job, just needed a few pointers. ~~~ A little while later and the sun was in its descent. You were still with Usopp, sitting on the deck. Nami had gone off to do some work, saying she’d see you later. He’d told you a few funny stories before he asked to see the electrical esthetician tools you had in your case. He was most interested in the nail drill, asking question after question. At some point, you didn’t have answers for him. You knew the basics of how it worked but your recollection of electron transfer was weak.  “Dinner’s ready!” Sanji called. Perfect timing, you were getting hungry. Usopp helped you up and you headed to the galley.  “How many people are on the ship?” you asked. You’d met five of them, not including the green haired man who didn’t introduce himself.  “There’s ten of us, eleven including you. We’re a small but strong crew.” Usopp flexed his arm. “By the way, I’m not going to arm wrestle you. I know my strengths, and fighting isn’t one of them.” Usopp looked relieved. “Not that I’d win anyway,” you continued, “you look strong. But I’ll let you handle the fighting.” Usopp smiled at your last statement. You wanted to compliment Usopp when you could, he seemed like he needed it.  “Oh yeah, I’ve won every arm wrestling competition I’ve ever had. Let me tell you the time when I arm wrestled a giant octopus and won against every tentacle…” You smiled to yourself and walked to the galley together. Entering through the swinging door, you saw a large table filled with nine other people. Well, mostly people. There was also a skeleton, an android looking guy, and a gigantic blue man - merman? And speaking of the merman, holy shit.  You’d spent time babysitting your nieces and had seen every Disney princess movie that had ever been released in the last 60 years. Their favorites were “Frozen,” and “Moana,” which was the better of the two. You found the polynesian demi-god to be…appealing. At least more than the white bread Cristoff. And that merman looked like Maui had decided to grow a meter and get more muscled. And turn blue. He was huge - maybe 3 meters tall - and you wanted to climb him like a tree. Did that make you a pervert? Maybe, but it was a gut reaction. You weren’t going to act on it. Besides, you weren’t blind, you could appreciate a good looking person when you saw one. He looked like he was around your age, or at least older than the group of younguns you’d met. Maybe the afterlife had its perks after all.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

You tore your gaze from Blue Maui to glance at the rest of the crew. Luffy was sitting and pounding his fists on the table, chanting for meat. Robin was sitting next to the android and chatting, with her hand on his oversized forearm. The green swordsman was slouching with his arms crossed next to a tiny…deer. Who was talking to a giant skeleton with an afro. Alright. Nami sat next to you and Usopp, with Sanji coming from the kitchen with a serving platter. A strange group of people, but hey, you were dead so it’s not like you could talk.  Sanji served you first, even before the Captain, which surprised you. “A vegetarian meal for our dearest Reader,” Sanji said. He looked anxious and he was hovering over you. He clearly wanted you to try the food in front of him and give him a review. He gave you glazed carrots, a spring style salad, and a bean and mushroom stew served over rice.  He didn’t need to be nervous, it all looked incredible. You weren’t the main cook in your previous relationship, that had been mostly done by your partner. You were satisfied eating the same boring things over and over daily, which you’d done for the past few years. You picked up your fork and sampled the glazed carrots. It was unbelievable, the carrots practically melting on your tongue. Your taste buds were singing, you didn’t think carrots could be so rich. You sampled each item he’d prepared while he flitted back and forth, serving the rest of the crew, starting with the women.  “Sanji, this is outstanding! I’ve never eaten anything like this before, you’re such a talented chef.” The carrots, the stew, the salad, everything tasted like it had been made by a French chef. Sanji beamed at you. “I apologize, we are running low on supplies right now. At the next island, I’ll buy more vegetables. Most of the crew prefers a more meat heavy diet.” This was him running low on supplies? You couldn’t wait to see what he whipped up with a fully stocked kitchen. “MEAT! MEAT! MEAT! MEAT!…” Luffy continued to chant over Sanji speaking to you. “LUFFY, SHUT UP! I’m speaking to our lovely Reader,” Sanji sighed and went to fetch food for Luffy. Once the food was placed in front of him, Luffy was like a vacuum. You made a mental note to keep your hands and feet away from his mouth during meal time. He reminded you of that game, Kirby, where the little pink guy would literally inhale food. Or a dog with food aggression. Luffy was using both hands, double fisting the meat and eating as rapidly as humanly possible.  “Would you like to introduce our new Reader, Luffy?” Robin asked politely. “Oh yeah, this is Misty,” Luffy said while chewing, gesturing to you with one meat skewer. It took everything in you not to chide him for speaking with his mouth full. Who raised this kid?  “Actually, her name is also Robin, but we are calling her Misty to avoid confusion,” Robin clarified. “She is our new Reader, but she does not know any information about our world, including who we are. It's a fresh start for all of us, so let’s go around and introduce ourselves. Appropriately. ” Robin gave a look to the android and skeleton, emphasizing the last word. “She’s obviously lying,” interjected the green haired swordsman. “No, I’m not, I really -” you started to argue with him but were interrupted by Sanji, who already had his foot on the swordsman's shoulder.  “How dare you accuse our newest, sweetest Mellorine of lying?!” He was in the green guy’s face on your behalf, it looked like they might fight again.  “Thank you, Sanji, but I understand his hesitation. But I promise, I really don’t know anything about this world. I haven’t even been to the sea before. I guess that’s one thing off my bucket list.” Well, you’d already kicked the bucket so you weren’t sure that it counted.  “Whaddya mean? Never been to the sea?” asked Luffy, still chewing with his mouth open. You shrugged. “I mean, I’ve been in lakes and rivers and pools and things like that. I always wanted to visit the ocean before I died. Where I lived, the ocean was really far away. It was always a little too expensive to go so I never did.” It made you sad to think you'd spend nearly your whole life working and for what? You didn't get to the Pacific, you didn't travel to Fiji, you didn't get to do a lot of things you'd wanted before you apparently died. “We’ve heard about their world before, others have shared similar sentiments. To Zoro’s point, I do not believe she is lying. I’ve been monitoring her interactions and she does not seem to know any prior information.” Robin had been watching you? You hadn’t seen her following you around. But at least she was corroborating that you weren’t lying. So the green haired guy was Zoro. He still hadn’t introduced himself. “I’m Franky, the shipwright. It’s SUUUUUPER nice to meet you.” He had exquisite blue hair shaped like a sailing ship. Maybe wild hair colors were natural in this world. You hoped so, you absolutely loved it. “I like your hairstyle,” you complimented.  “Thanks, sis,” Franky responded, making a finger gun and running his hand along the side of his hair. It was clearly a source of pride for him, as was only right for such a good style. Next, the skeleton put down his cup of tea. “I’m Brook, the Soul King. I'm the musician on the crew and I’d love to see -” Nami bonked him over the head before he could finish his sentence. Hard. “Don’t you dare! Robin just asked everyone to behave!” She was quick, that was for sure. And based on his reaction, fairly strong. “-your panties,” he finished despite the bonk.  “No. Don’t ask again,” you replied. Ew. But also he was a nine foot tall skeleton, so his sense of decorum might have been off. He had kind of a Hendrix / Slash vibe going on, complete with afro. You really should commend whoever made this world, the hair here was fantastic. The little deer put down his milk and said in a serious tone, “I’m Chopper, the ship’s doctor.” It would have been more impressive if he didn’t have a milk mustache when he told you this. Talking skeleton, talking deer, rubber people, dead people, this ship was like a haunted house mixed with Disneyland. At least your life was ending with a bang. “I can help you if you have a headache from the timespace travel, it’s happened to a few of our readers.”  After thanking Chopper, the last of the group, Blue Maui, introduced himself as well. “I am Jinbe, the ship’s helmsman. It is a pleasure to meet you,” he said, giving you a bow. Your heart and face warmed. You knew it didn’t mean anything - it was basically the same introduction everyone else had given you as well. But coming from someone as good looking as Jinbe, you couldn’t help it. What, were you 12 again? “Pleased to meet you as well,” you replied smiling. Luffy interrupted your very brief conversation with his mouth full. “So if you’re shipwrecked on an island, and there were only animals there,” Luffy began as you inwardly groaned, already knowing where this was going, “would you eat one to survive?” You laughed. “You know what’s funny? I die and come to this world only to be asked the same questions as the last one. I would. But it’s not something I worry about.” “So who’s your favorite?” Luffy continued, beaming at you. You weren’t sure exactly what he was asking. “My favorite what?” “Your favorite Strawhat!” Luffy smiled, but you saw Sanji and Usopp tense slightly. “Luffy, she doesn’t know us. She doesn't have a favorite like our previous readers,” Robin interrupted her Captain. “I do not know if she is even aware we are the Strawhat Pirates.” Luffy shoved more meat into his mouth before replying, “oh, right. Well, we’re the Strawhats. Cus of my hat. And your favorites probably gonna be me. Or Zoro. Or Nami. That’s who everyone says.” Luffy grinned widely. You didn’t reply but it seemed kind of rude to pick favorites in front of the other crew members.  “You’re not always everyone’s favorite!” interjected Usopp, the conversation hitting a nerve. “I am! It’s my show! I’m the antagonist-” Luffy yelled back. “Protagonist,” corrected Robin, now sipping on some tea. “This isn’t a show, it's just life!” continued Usopp. “You’re not the main character, that’s not how it works.” Luffy pouted but kept eating. “Let’s get a round going for the new reader!” exclaimed Nami, trying to change the subject.  “Brilliant idea Nami-swan! Dearest Misty, what would you prefer to drink? We have some sake, wine, and ale. You are our guest, you choose first. ” Sanji came to your side immediately, like a waiter on demand. “Oh, I don’t drink,” you replied, “but it doesn’t bother me if anyone else does.” Zoro (who still hadn’t introduced himself) snorted. “What kinda life is that? No meat, no booze. What’s the fuckin’ point?” he scoffed.  You laughed lightly. “I would have said the same when I was 20. Just not my style anymore.”  “So go get the booze shitcook, she said we can drink,” Zoro turned to Sanji, already ignoring you. You could see Sanji puffing up for a fight already. “If she’s not drinking, you’re not drinking either, you stupid mossbrain! You don’t get shit anyway for insulting her!” They were already in each other’s faces. No one else had paused their side conversations to listen or watch. You wondered how many times a day this happened. Zoro and Sanji went back and forth, though you noticed Zoro didn’t stop eating his food and Sanji didn’t put down his tray. Everyone else had returned to their side conversations, ignoring the two men completely. The crew seemed cohesive, like everyone was on good terms with each other. Even Zoro and Sanji's fighting wasn't disturbing the overall vibe of the dinner. It was loud, animated, chaotic, and reminded you of Sunday night dinners with your own family. You enjoyed it for a few minutes, eating your meal and watching the dynamics of the crew.  Everyone was wrapping up their meals and finishing their food. Usopp and Nami got up to leave, but left their dirty plates on the table. “ Excuse me, take your plates to the sink. No one’s coming behind to pick up after you,” you snapped at them. The room went silent as they stared at you. Oops. Having several bad roommates and coworkers over many years had left a few ingrained habits. “Uh, sorry, didn’t mean that. Just tell me where I can put my plate.” “Leave it on the table, Twirlybrow cleans up,” replied Zoro. “Why? Didn’t he cook the food?” you asked, confused. It was basically a sin where you grew up to leave your plate on the table, much less for the cook. Didn’t they rotate the cleaning? “So? He likes it,” Zoro was being petulant, probably because of whatever he had going on with the cook.  “Again, sorry, I didn't mean to overstep. It’s just that where I’m from, if you cook, you don’t clean. That’s always how it is. But, not my circus,” you said, putting your hands up in apology. You didn’t mean to offend, but the man had just cooked a multi course meal for eleven, plated and served it. Surely he didn’t have to clean up everything by himself too. It felt unfair, but it wasn’t your place to change the way things were. “Whassat mean? Not my circus?” Luffy asked, finally full of food. His belly was stretched comically large, seemed like being made of rubber had its benefits. “Oh, it’s a common saying. ‘Not my circus, not my monkeys.’ Meaning, it isn’t my place to say anything. You know like, not my problem, not my business.” Luffy smiled at you. “I am your monkey! Monkey D. Luffy! Thanks Sanji!” With that, Luffy got up and took his plate, putting it into the sink. Usopp and Nami did the same, bringing their plates with them after watching their Captain. One by one, the crew thanked Sanji and brought their plates to the sink until it was just you and Sanji left. You still had a lot of food on your plate and you weren’t done eating yet.  “Sorry, I’ve always been a slow eater, especially when I’m in a group or talking with other people. I can finish this later.” You felt bad stopping him from beginning on the overwhelming amount of dishes he was going to have to do.  “No, no. Please. Enjoy at your leisure mon cherie. It’s nice to see someone who doesn’t just shove everything down their throat.” Sanji was a little off, he wasn’t saying anything cringy or chivalrous in your honor, just clearing off the table. “Sorry that I butted in. I didn’t mean to disrupt the way things are here,” you offered.  “No, I - I appreciate the sentiment.” Sanji said, back turned to you. “I can help you clear the table if you wish, or wash some dishes. I can’t fight and don’t have super-powers like everyone else but I definitely know my way around dish soap,” you tried for a light hearted approach. “My mom really drilled into us that whoever cooks doesn’t clean. It’s hard for me to watch you and not help, especially after you just cooked such an incredible meal.” Sanji smiled at you, but it didn’t reach his eyes.  “It is no burden on me, mon coeur. Please, eat. You are a guest on the ship, and a lady besides.” You dropped it as the chef began cleaning again, clearing the table of serving platters and pitchers, bringing them to be washed. You watched him as you ate, asking him about the preparation of the dishes you were eating. Once you got him talking about food, he dropped a lot of the chivalrous talk and spoke passionately about his love of food and drink. He was calm and patient, answering all your questions. It was obvious he excelled in his field, both from your empty plate and the amount of knowledge he had. Once you were done, you stacked your silverware, cup and plate and brought them to the sink. Sanji was elbow deep in dishes, and he would be for a while.  “C’mon, let me help you. This is gonna take you hours to do alone.”  “Ladies shouldn’t have to life a finger -” Sanji began. You cut him off. “I don’t have to, I want to. It would…make me happy?” You ended the sentence on a higher register. You figured that if he was really a chivalrous guy, he would take your wants and desires into consideration.  Sanji blinked up at you with his one visible eye, surprise registering before it was hidden. “It would make you happy? But you only have precious little time left, you want to spend it washing dishes?” What was this guy’s deal? Did no one ever help him before? You’d never fought so hard to wash dishes in your life. “Well, I want to spend every day eating more of your scrumptious food. Which means that the utensils, pots, pans, bowls, everything has to be washed and cleaned, right? Kind of goes hand in hand.”  “Alright, just this once mon mie. If it would make you happy.” “It would,” you replied firmly. With that, he moved over, giving you some space at the sink. You’d had a dishwasher at your house for years, but growing up everything was washed by hand. You had countless hours of experience doing the dishes, and there weren’t any differences between your world and this one on how to scrub a dirty fork. You and the chef fell into an amicable silence, working side by side. Something you hadn’t anticipated was that there was no background noise on the ship. Sure, there were the sounds of the waves, of some sea birds, of the crew on board. But for the past few years you’d gotten used to always having something on to provide white noise - the television or YouTube mostly. You were used to passively listening to music or long form videos while you cooked, cleaned, did laundry, any basic repetitive task. So standing quietly next to the cook made your mind wander to music.  Obviously, you didn’t have access to your music from home. You tried to think of songs to sing in your head to keep yourself busy. But, as it turned out, you didn’t know the complete lyrics to all that many songs, even though you listened to music constantly. You could remember bits and pieces, or remember the tune, but there weren’t that many songs you could sing from beginning to end. It seemed like the only songs you could remember the lyrics to were either Top 40s hit ending in 2012, songs from your childhood, or songs from the Disney movies your nieces liked. You were deep in your mind, trying to conjure up some songs to sing to, when the cook asked you what you were humming. “Beg your pardon?” you hadn’t realized you were humming out loud. “Oh, I was just wondering what song you were humming. I haven’t heard that one before. It’s always entertaining to learn new songs from Readers.” “Ah. Sorry. Um, it’s nothing, just a commercial jingle, I’m sorry. I’ll stop,” you turned a little red.  “No, no. I liked it a lot. Does it have lyrics?” And so you taught Sanji the words to 877-CASHNOW. By the time the two of you were finishing the dishes, you were calling and responding to one another with gusto. It was quite fun, and you were glad the young chef was humoring you. When the last dish was dry, you patted him on the arm.  “Thanks for indulging me, Sanji. You have quite a pleasant singing voice. We’ll do it again soon.” He didn’t know you’d be helping him a lot on dish duty. You’d tell him later, you had a feeling he was going to fight you on it. But you wanted to be useful, and it had actually been a fun way to pass the time.  “The pleasure is all mine,  mon cherie. I’m done much earlier than I usually am, for which I have you to thank.” Sanji lit up a cigarette. You’d seen him smoking earlier, but not during dinner service. But you didn’t know any chefs who didn’t smoke, so you weren’t going to give him grief over it. “Thank you for dinner, Sanji.” You patted his head like a little boy and left the galley. Outside the crew was relaxing and enjoying the cool evening air together. “What’s a structured settlement?” Luffy yelled across the deck. You laughed. “Oh, sorry. I didn’t know you could hear us. I’ll keep it down next time.” You hoped your singing wasn’t too off key. “Why do you do that?” Luffy asked, walking towards you while picking his nose. “Sing? I’ve always liked it. I’m not good by any means, but it’s fun -” “No, apologize all the time. You’re always saying sorry but you don’t do anything you need to apologize for.”  You fidgeted, rubbing the tips of your fingers together. “Oh, sorry, bad habit, I guess. I’ll try to stop.” Luffy flicked a booger onto the deck and sat down cross legged without washing his hands. Gross. “You don’t need to be sorry for being here. We want you here.” Luffy said, his hands resting on his feet. For being a gross teenager, he was perceptive. You did worry a little about being a burden on the crew, even if it was only for a short while. You had always been a people pleaser, even when you were a child. It had gotten better for a little while in adulthood, but recently you’d fallen back into old habits. You didn’t like relying on other people without providing anything in exchange. Maybe that’s why you fought Sanji so hard on washing the dishes. It wasn’t like it was a chore you loved doing, it was something you knew you could do. You’d think about what Luffy said more. “Thank you, Luffy. That’s kind of you to say.” You almost patted his head too, but you remembered the boogers. Maybe after he bathed. You noticed Nami had come up, waiting for you to finish your conversation with Luffy. “Come on, I’ll give you a tour of the ship,” she said. “We can pop by the living quarters too, Robin’s set something up for you.” You agreed, following the orange haired woman.  “So, the ship’s called the ‘Going Sunny,’ it’s like the ‘Going Merry’ and ‘1,000 Sunny’ mixed together. I don’t know how Franky did it, but he took the Merry and combined it with the Sunny and this is what we ended up with. A Reader once gave us a good drawing of the 1,000 Sunny and Franky used the best parts of both ships." You didn’t know what she was talking about but you nodded anyway. She took you around the ship, starting with the top deck and working your way down to the bottom. It was an incredible ship - there was a tangerine grove, the head of a ram on the keel, a huge fish tank, a spa level bathing area, even a library. You had never seen anything like it. Finishing with the crew quarters, Nami showed you where you would be sleeping. It was a small cot between her bed and Robin’s. Nothing fancy, but you hoped you wouldn’t need to use it too much. You only had three weeks left to live, and you wanted to make the most of it.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“You’re so squishy!” Luffy said, wrapping his arms around you multiple times. It was still unnerving to see the kid stretch like that, much less hug you like a rubber band wound several times around you. He had his head pushed against your boobs, the rest of him hugging you like he was a koala. It was late at night, most of the crew had already gone to bed. You were tired but had nervous energy, you wanted to stay up a little longer. You were sitting on the grass of the tangerine grove, not far from the helmsman. Watching him gracefully maneuver the ship was relaxing and taking your mind off of your worries. He was very zen in some ways, and you hoped his chill would rub off on you. “Thanks,” you deadpanned. You were used to it, your nieces sometimes told you similar sentiments. But they were children, not captains of pirate ships. You didn’t try to pry him off for now, he could hang on you. “You’re like a pillow all over!” You gave a half hearted eye roll to the Captain’s statement. Apparently Luffy picked up on your irritation. “What? It’s not a bad thing, why are you mad?” “I’m not mad, it’s just a weird thing to hear,” you stated. You felt out of place when all these people were so muscled and toned. You walked a lot, sure, but they looked like they trained in the gym non stop. Even Luffy didn’t have much fat on him, despite the amount you saw him eat at dinner. You had a feeling that despite their appearances, Brook and Chopper could hold their own too. “Well I don’t care. I’m gonna hug you as much as I want.” You scoffed at Luffy's words. How self centered, you thought. But based on what you’d seen of the kid, he was always like this. “As much as you want? What if I don’t want to hug?” you replied. You wanted to see what the kid would do, if he’d push your boundaries. “You don’t?!” Luffy gave you the biggest, saddest puppy eyes you’d ever seen as his arms unraveled from your torso. Someone taught the kid well. That or he knew his strengths. “Nah, it’s ok kid, you can hug me.” He was too cute to say no to. He beamed at you, arms tightening once more like a boa constrictor.  “Tell me a story from your world,” Luffy demanded.  “A story? Sorry, I really don’t know the story of this-” “No, not One Piece, sometimes the readers know other stories. I’ve heard about Goku, Naruto, Yuji, Eren, Izuku, Jojo, Inu Yasha, lots of ‘em. I like those ones, especially Goku. I wish I could fight him in real life. Maybe he could be reader-ed into my world next, you think?” Based on the names, you thought they all sounded like anime stories. “Ah, I’m not familiar with those, sorry. I’m not really into those kinds of things. I know some other stories though. Uh, hold on, lemme think.” You paused for a moment, trying to think of a story to tell Luffy. You didn't mind entertaining the Captain, he reminded you of your nieces in some ways. You’d been telling your nieces stories when you put them to bed, but they were mostly wish fulfillment about how they would get to go to Elsa’s ice castle or a party under the sea with Ariel, things like that. The last movie you’d watched with them was the Wizard of Oz, which you showed them to get out of watching Frozen for the 487th time in a row. “Ok, I think I got one. Have you heard of Dorothy and the Wizard of Oz?”  “Nuh uh,” Luffy said, shaking his head quickly from side to side, “I wanna hear it.” He seemed already enraptured and you hadn’t even begun telling the story.  So you sat on the deck, kept warm by Luffy entangled around you, and told him the beginning of the story of Dorothy and her friends. You told him about Kansas and Dororthy and Miss Gultch, about Glinda the Good Witch, the ruby red slippers, and the yellow brick road. You even sang the songs you could remember, doing them in silly voices if you could. Luffy laughed at your singing and made you sing the Munchkinland songs three times before you could move on. He paid rapt attention to you as you recalled the story of Dorothy and her trials and tribulations in Oz. After you recounted how she met the Scarecrow and his missing brain, you started yawning. “Alright, Luffy. That’s enough for tonight. I got tired, I’m gonna go to bed.” You gave him a final hug and started to push him off you. “No! But Dorothy just made a friend! And she hasn’t met the wizard! I need to know what happens next!” Luffy was highly invested in Dorothy’s adventure, but you yawned again. “I guess you’ll find out tomorrow,” you replied. “I can tell you more of the story tomorrow night, I’m too tired right now.” Luffy frowned but nodded, arms unraveling. “Jinbe, do you wanna hear it too?” Luffy yelled to the helmsman. In your effort to entertain Luffy, you’d forgotten he was there.  “I do, it is interesting,” Jinbe replied. “I like it more than some of the adventure tales readers have shared before. Especially the songs.” You blushed, which you hoped was hidden by the night. You felt like Jinbe was your middle school crush and you’d been assigned a group project together, giddy just to be near him even if it wasn't by your design. “Alright,” you agreed, “we can meet tomorrow and find out what happens to our heroine. Good night, Jinbe. Good night, Luffy.” You gave the kid a kiss on the top of his head and headed off to the women’s quarters. You distantly heard Luffy saying something and Jinbe laughing. You tucked yourself into the little cot between Nami and Robin’s beds, covered yourself with the ratty blanket, and fell asleep almost instantly. ~In one of the many many documentaries you’d watched over the years, you learned that some birds would sleep for a set number of hours, sleeping until they had their fill. Others would wake up at the same time every day, no matter what the circumstances were. Unfortunately for you, you were like one of the latter. You woke up in what you assumed was the early morning, Nami and Robin still asleep in the pre-dawn hour. Tip toeing out of the room, you weren’t sure where to go. The deck would be cold and you were still in your original clothes you were brought in. At your salon, the requirements were only that it had to be all black, so you were wearing black jeggings and a black long sleeve shirt. You slowly walked the hall, trying to think of where to go. As you passed the galley, you saw the lights in the kitchen were already on. Going to the galley, you hoped to get a cup of coffee and sit in silence before your brain fully turned on. Opening the door, Sanji was prepping food for some upcoming meal while also baking some kind of breakfast treat.  “Good morning, Sanji,” you yawned out, going to sit at the dining table. “Good morning dearest Misty-san. Isn’t it a bit early for you to be up? Why don’t you go back to bed and I’ll gently wake you with the rest of the ladies?” You didn’t want to deal with his stupid chivalrous bullshit right now. “Unfortunately I’m always up at this time, just how I am. Does this world have coffee?” “Yes, it does, but -” “Thank FUCK,” you exclaimed, sagging against the wooden bench in relief. “- but we don’t have any right now. We’re all out, I sincerely apologize,” the blond chef lamented. You closed your eyes momentarily, holding off on cussing out the chef. It wasn’t his fault, but you’d been having coffee since you were 12. You hadn’t missed a day since…ever.  “Do you have black tea?” you asked, trying to conceal your eye twitch. Maybe if you drank a gallon it would help stop your headache from coming. “We do, along with several other varieties. I’ll bring you a selection.” Sanji was so courteous it was hard to be annoyed. You held in your huff of irritation, he was trying. “I’ll get some coffee at the next island. I’ll adjust the budget, which means less meat for Luffy…” Sanji said to himself, probably calculating costs. “I mean, I can probably make money pretty easy. But don’t you guys just, y’know…steal it?” you asked, gesturing vaguely with a sword slashing motion. “Steal it? From whom?” Sanji was surprised at your words, he looked almost offended. “Sorry, I don’t mean to upset you, it’s just that you’re pirates, right? So don’t you like, steal money? Jewels, gems, treasure, that sort of thing? Pillage and loot?” Sanji smiled, apparently not upset with you. “Not this crew. We find treasure, or grateful people will give us money, but that’s about it. We don’t steal or murder. Not Luffy’s style.” Ah, they were moral pirates. You’d ask Luffy more about it later after you’d had at least 200mg of caffeine. “What do you mean, you can make easy money?” Sanji asked, referring to your earlier question.  “You and I have the ability to make money anywhere. Hair and food don’t change from place to place. People need haircuts and people need to eat. You obviously work a lot, I’m sure you want a break, but I can do a pop-up salon. Charge whatever the going rate is, make some cash,” you mused aloud. Pop-ups weren’t your favorite, but it would make money quickly. And you needed coffee, it wasn’t an option. Sanji brought you a mug of hot water and a variety of tea. Looking through them, you made a cup of Earl Gray, hoping it would help.  “Just leave the dishes in the sink, I’ll get to ‘em in a little bit. I need to be two cups in before I really start moving,” you told Sanji, who had already resumed his chopping. It was pleasant in the kitchen, warm and cozy, listening to the soft clacking of Sanj’s even cutting. “Ah, ah. You’re not spending another moment -” “Enough, Sanji. It’s too early to argue. Leave ‘em.” You dismissed the young man’s efforts to keep you from dishwashing using your kind but firm Voice of Authority. It worked in the salon on younger trainees and equally well on Sanji. The two of you sat in companionable silence, you watching Sanji work while sipping your tea. As you sat, the sun started to peek over the horizon and you watched the sunrise through the small window in the galley door. “Just as beautiful here,” you said to yourself. You’d always liked the sunrise and were happy to see another. The crew woke one by one and came to the kitchen, seeking Sanji’s company and cooking. You weren’t sure the chef noticed that the kitchen was everyone’s first stop of the day. He really was a sweet kid, he knew what everyone would want first thing and had a hot breakfast waiting for those who wanted it. By the time Franky and Usopp had come into the kitchen, you’d finished your second cup of tea and put it in the sink, heading for the door. You hadn’t seen Zoro or Jinbe yet but you knew Jinbe had been up late the night before steering the boat so it made sense he would be sleeping.  “Misty-san, you didn’t eat yet!” Sanji called across the room in despair. You weren’t a breakfast person, you hadn’t been since your teens, and no amount of Sanji-pouting was going to change that. “I’ll eat later, Sanjito, don’t worry. I’m gonna get some fresh air.” Opening the door to the deck, you meandered outside, taking in the view of the sea. Usopp came and joined you a few minutes later, watching the waves with you for a while while the two of you leaned against the railing. “By the way,” you supplied, “I was completely serious about your hair. It’s absolutely gorgeous, let me know if there’s a particular style you’d like to try out. I’ll do whatever you want I just hope you don’t want it too short, it’s so lovely.”  “Yeah, I was thinking about maybe doing something, I’m pretty open,” Usopp said, blushing pink.  “Would you mind if I touched it? Get a feel for the texture and porosity?” you asked. Usopp shook his head and you reached up to touch his beautiful hair, pulling on the length lightly. “Absolutely amazing,” you cooed at him, causing him to blush again. “If you want I can give you some ideas but really the sky’s the limit for you. You have enough length for almost any style. We can start later this morning if you want, maybe you can catch me up on this world while I work. Two birds with one stone and all that?” You did need to learn how things worked here and Usopp would be fun to spend time with. It didn’t ultimately matter, you’d had many unpleasant clients before, but it was always better to have interesting or funny clients while you stood over them for hours. “Uh, y-yeah, that sounds great,” Usopp stammered. You removed your hand from his hair and smiled at the insecure man. You’d been brainstorming about his hair that morning and had a few ideas to suggest. You patted his shoulder and he went off to start working. Speaking of, you headed back into the kitchen to see the sink full of dishes and Sanji’s sleeves already rolled up. Luffy was the last person at the table, and was eating a pile of meat. “Nuh uh, get out kid,” you stood behind Sanji and tried to push him gently away from the sink. The kid had strong sea legs, he didn’t budge. “My dearest Misty-swan, I simply could not allow you to do these dishes, especially on your own-” Sanji started up, ready to dissuade you. “Luffy, Sanji told me he wants to make special meat for dinner, but he doesn’t have the time if he does the dishes. And he won’t let me help. Tell him I’m doing the dishes right now,” you commanded Luffy. Luffy looked up at the word “meat,” and gulped down an enormous mouthful. “‘S’at true Sanji?” Luffy asked. He already had his hands full of more food to shovel in. “No, well, I mean, I could, there’s tough meat I could marinate to soften for dinner but -” Sanji was quickly interrupted by the boy Captain. “Misty, does the dishes, Sanji starts the meat for tonight! Issit gonna be a feast?” You grinned snarkily at Sanji at your triumph. “Captain’s orders, Sanjito. Gotta follow them, right? So skidaddle,” you put your hands on the Chef’s back and gently pushed him again. He allowed himself to be moved from in front of the sink towards the dry storage. “Alright, but only once more. I can’t allow -” “Oh hush kid,” you said with no malice, “get to marinating. I’ll let you do the ones after lunch.” And so you triumphed against Sanji once more, doing the morning dishes as Luffy asked question after question about the meat for the dinner. You weren't sure what a "Sea King" was, but you wouldn't be eating it anyway. You hummed to yourself some of the songs from Frozen since you could practically recite the whole movie by heart. When you were done and the sink was cleared, you realized your clothes were wet from the dirty water. You went off in search of Nami or Robin to see if they had any clothes from previous readers. You found Robin in the library, reading a large tome while lounging in a large overstuffed armchair with her legs folded up under her. “Hey Robin, question for you,” you started while the blue eyed woman put a bookmark in her spot. “Good morning Robin. Yes, how may I help you?” Robin smiled kindly, closing her book. “I was wondering if you have any extra clothes from previous readers that I can wear? Mine got wet,” you asked. Robin put a finger to her chin in thought. “I think there are a few, but not many. You can borrow clothes from Nami or myself in the meantime if you wish,” Robin replied. You smiled but internally you grimaced. First of all, you were shorter than Nami and Robin. It’s not like you were particularly short, you were average height in your area. But Nami and especially Robin were much taller than you. But more than that, both of them were unbelievably slim and busty, you weren’t sure you’d fit into anything they had just due to differences in proportion. Also, they seemed to prefer skimpy and skin tight clothes, which was completely fine. It just wasn’t your vibe - you preferred oversized clothing for at least a shirt or pants. Today was the second day in a row you’d seen Nami wearing a bikini top as a shirt and it just wasn’t for you.  “Oh, thanks. Would you mind if I went to go look?” You’d poke around, see if anything would fit. If not, it wasn’t forever anyway. You could make something work for a few weeks. “Not at all. The reader's clothes are in the wicker basket in our room, and Nami and I keep our clothes in the closet. Borrow what you’d like from the right hand side, that’s mine. You may wish to ask Nami before you borrow from hers as she may charge for certain items.” “Thanks for the heads up, I’ll ask her,” you told Robin, leaving her to her reading. Charge you? For borrowing clothes? Nami was a shrewd businesswoman, you could respect the hustle, but didn't have any money to pay her with. Heading over to your room, you decided not to bother with finding Nami - you didn’t think her clothes would fit anyway. Looking through the wicker basket, you found a large enough sweatshirt but nothing else you’d think would fit. Robin’s pants wouldn’t fit you either. You settled for a circle skirt she had, but had to roll the waistband quite a few times since Robin was so tall. It was a weird outfit, but you weren’t going to be judged by Tyra or anything.  As you were going to leave the women’s quarters, you did a double take as you glanced at Nami’s bedside table. There was a giant snail with a rotary phone on its shell. You took a step back and went to give it a closer look. It looked kind of like a woman with tattoos across her chest and a bandana in her hair, but if she were a snail. You ran a finger over the shell of the snail, which caused it to wake up, to your surprise. You thought it was a figurine or something, not a live snail. It gave you a mild smile, lazily blinking at you. You stoked its shell with your finger, the snail almost reaching into your touch. “Aww, how cute are you? You look like an African Land Snail,” you cooed at the languid gastropod. Of course, you'd watched a documentary about the largest snails on earth and it made you want one as a pet. As you touched the bottom of the rotary on its shell to examine the phone element, the snail whined. “Oh no! Is that too tight for you? Are you a growing baby?” you fretted. Having taken care of your own animals for years meant that you couldn’t leave an animal in distress, even if it was a…snail phone. You went to your hairdressing kit, rummaging around. Finding the screwdriver you used to disassemble your scissors for sharpening, you turned the screws loose on the rotary. When it was loose, you pried it gently off the snail’s lower shell. You could have sworn the snail sighed in relief.  “I’m gonna call you Toto. Both because of Dorothy and because y’know…African snail…Africa.…Toto…God, I’m funny. People should really appreciate me more," you said to the smiling snail. "Not you, Toto. You’re great the way you are.” You rubbed your hand along its moist neck and it leaned into you. Poor little guy. “I’ll bring you something to eat later, don’t worry.” You patted the snail once more and left to go find Usopp, bringing your train case with you. On your way to find Usopp, you passed by Brook and gave him a smile. You hoped he didn’t ask to see your panties again. “Good morning, fair Misty-chan. May I -” “This better not be about my panties,” you threatened with the screwdriver you were still holding. “Ah, then I have a different question, Misty-chan. Do you play any instruments in addition to your singing? I always enjoy having additional musicians on board. Some of the readers have taught me such interesting songs, I’d love to hear if you know any.” You blushed, embarrassed again that everyone had been hearing your singing and humming. “Uh, well, I’m not really a singer. I’m sure you can tell I’m off-key. But I can play a couple of instruments.”  “Oh? Please, do share,” Brook asked, inclining his head. You weren’t sure how a skull conveyed interest, but his expression did somehow change. “I can, uh, play the ukelele a little. And I’ve been taking piano lessons for the past few years. I’m not very good at either.” Like all good Millennials, you taught yourself to play the ukelele in 2012 to complete your ‘quirky’ image. “Would you like to play together? I’d be more than happy to continue your piano lessons if you wish.” You thought about it, you’d started lessons a few years ago as a way to fill your time after…well, after you suddenly had a lot more become available. “My piano is over here, please, if you wish.” Brook had an absolutely stunning grand piano on the top deck, you’d seen it during your initial tour. Your fingers itched to touch the smooth keys, you bet it sounded incredible. “Are you sure? Sorry, I don’t usually play for anyone, just myself,” you apologized. “Please, it would be my absolute pleasure to hear you play.” You didn’t really have a reason not to, and it wasn’t like you were actually busy doing anything in the afterlife. Humoring a skeleton would take only a few minutes of your time, if that. You sat down at the piano, taking a deep breath and placing your hands on the keys. After a quick warmup, you chose a song you had already mastered, The Velvet Underground’s “I’m Sticking With You.” It was cute, the lyrics were easy to remember, and you felt confident enough in your ability to not make a complete fool of yourself. You played the tune, while Brook nodded his head and tapped his foot in time to the beat. When you finished, he gave you a standing ovation, which only made you blush again. “Incredible! Do not denigrate yourself, you have the makings of an excellent piano player. Thank you for sharing that song with us, the tune and words are so simple yet so meaningful,” Brook complimented.  “That song was great!” yelled Luffy from across the deck. “It’s like me! I’m sticking with my nakama forever! And you’re all sticking with me!” You got up from the piano bench, smiling at the boy. “Well, for the next few weeks anyway. After that, who knows?” you said, shrugging. Luffy just smiled even brighter. “Yeah, who knows?” he repeated after you. The way he smiled was curious, but it wasn’t like he could do anything about your circumstances. You were stuck like glue with them, at least until you died. Again. “And what about the ukelele? Would you grace us with another song?” Brook asked, pulling a uke out of his hair. You didn’t want to ask about the physics behind that, but took the small instrument. You hadn’t played in a few years but it wasn’t a particularly difficult instrument. You strummed it lightly, making sure it was in tune. Once you were satisfied that it was, you decided to play “Somewhere Over the Rainbow,” the Israel Kamakawiwoʻole version. You’d been thinking about it since the previous night when you were telling the story to Luffy. “Hey, Lu, this is a song from that story I was telling you. This is what Dorothy sings when she wishes she wasn’t in Kansas anymore,” you said to the Captain, who’d come closer and sat near the piano. Singing the gentle tune, you played and crooned the soft lyrics. Obviously you where nowhere near as good as Israel, but you'd sang it a lot in your twenties and didn't think you sounded too bad. Lost in the music, you didn’t realize the deck had gone silent until you had finished the final notes.  “Young lady, you have blessed us with this charming tune,” Brook said, taking off his top hat and bowing to you. “Ah, thanks. It’s uh, nothing really,” you said, embarrassed again. You kept your eyes on the uke, fiddling with it. “I’m gonna, uh, find Usopp now,” you finished lamely, putting the ukelele on the piano bench. “We can meet this afternoon for your piano lesson,” Brook suggested.  “Sure, thanks. That’d be uh, nice.” You agreed to meet your living skeleton pirate crewmate for piano lessons, thinking to yourself how you and Dorothy both weren’t in Kansas anymore.

----- CHAPTER BREAK -----

“So where’re we going anyway?” you asked while your hands busied themselves brushing out Usopp’s beautiful hair. You were sitting behind him on a stool while the young man sat on the deck of the ship, the two of you falling into easy conversation. You’d given him a few options for a style and he’d decided on half cornrows half natural. It made sense since you’d always seen him in a bandana to keep the hair out of his face while the rest of his hair hung freely. You were brushing part of the front out in preparation for the braiding process but at least Usopp wasn’t super tender headed.
 
“Right now we’re on the way to an island to restock on supplies. After that we’re headed to melee with some crews we’re allied with,” Usopp said, wincing as you got out a particularly large snarl with your brush.
 
“Melee? Like fight them? Why?” You replied, scrunching your face, the knot still fighting you. 
 
“Well, the so-called canon events that would have made us stronger didn’t happen. We still need to increase our strength so Luffy can be Pirate King. Luffy didn’t fight Crocodile, Doflamingo, Marineford didn’t happen…” You nodded along even though you didn’t know any of these people or events. “So Robin had the idea to have the crews fight one another, no holds barred. It’s us, the Heart Pirates, the Kid Pirates, and some of the Whitebeard Pirates. The only rule will be no killing,” Usopp said, bringing an already bitten nail to his mouth to chew. 
 
“Hmmm. And what do you do for fighting? Is that - er, how do you fight? Sorry, I’m not familiar with this kind of stuff,” you said to continue the conversation while separating his hair with a rat tailed comb and clipping the rest away, slapping some edge control onto the part. You had a little bit of edge control gel in a travel sized tub but you kept most of your braiding tools in another kit that was at your apartment. Most of the time all you did was cut, dye, and style for middle aged women, nothing too exciting.
 
“I’m the crew’s sniper,” Usopp explained while pantomiming a slingshot. 
 
“Really? That’s incredible!” you said with the comb between your teeth. You were starting to braid and Usopp winced slightly.
 
“Yow, those are tight!” 
 
“What, never had braids before?” you asked, laughing lightly at his expense.
 
“No, not really. I’ve always worn it plain. I never knew what to do with it and it was always so unmanageable -” you smacked Usopp gently with the comb before interrupting.
 
“It’s not unmanageable, don’t say that. And it’s not plain either. Maybe you just needed some instruction on how to get it to work for you.” You’d never liked when people were down about their hair, particularly when it wasn’t perfectly straight. “Your hair is stunning, so many of my clients would be jealous if they saw you. Probably ask you out too.” You dropped the last bit of information nonchalantly, like it had just slipped from your tongue. 
 
“Ah, heh. That’s - that’s nice. I actually have a, um, there’s a girl who I - well, we write letters now. But we were best friends when I lived in Syrup Village,” Usopp stammered, his cheeks turning dark red.
 
“You have a girlfriend? I’m not surprised given how handsome and smart you are. Tell me about her, what’s she like? How’d you meet?” you asked, genuinely curious. Usopp launched into his first mostly true tale, telling you about Kaya and how he’d met Luffy and the crew, how they fought Kuro and Django and saved Kaya from Kuro’s evil plans.
 
“That’s quite a story! No wonder she loves you,” you said at the end of his story, only about a quarter way through braiding. You had done cornrows quite a few times but it wasn’t your bread and butter. Other stylists were way faster than you, but they hadn’t pseudo died and ended up on a pirate ship so he got what he got. Besides, Luffy had already stopped by three times to see if Usopp was free to hang out. He’d watched you braid for a few minutes in silent contemplation before asking when you’d be done. It seemed Usopp was the Captain’s main babysitter…er, friend. 
 
“Mhmm, and that’s only the beginning of what’s happened. We didn’t do the whole Alabasta arc because a reader interfered with Thatch and Teach -” You stopped Usopp from launching into another tale so you could get a few details. 
 
“Yeah, about that. I need you to give me, like, the details of this world. Like, why can Luffy stretch? Why are there so many pirates? Who would you need to fight against? Who are those people? How much does stuff cost? Things like that so I can kind of understand what’s happening.” Usopp tried to nod but you had his hair tightly in your hands.
 
“

Ouch,

oh, right. Ok, so, let’s start with Gol D. Roger, the One Piece, and Devil Fruits….”
 
By the time you’d finished braiding Usopp’s hair, you’d heard the history of Gol D. Roger, the One Piece, the Golden Age of Pirates, and that Luffy wanted to be King of the Pirates. “So what

is

it though? The one piece? Like a treasure chest?” you asked, tying off the last braid.
 
“No one knows, we don’t even know where it is. That’s part of what Robin does, she reads the Poneglyphs for us,” Usopp explained as you began putting things away. You heard delicate violin music dancing through the air, lifting your spirits immensely. You’d always loved violin but lacked the money to ever afford one or pay for lessons. You practiced piano at the Community center and had a cheap keyboard you’d bought at a garage sale years prior. You’d had the same piano teacher for years and you paid her in haircuts.
 “So. We’re looking for something that we don’t know what it is, where it is, or what it does. And the person who suggested we go look for it was executed by the military. Just making sure I understand,” you said, raising a brow. 
“Yes,” Usopp confirmed, fiddling with the ends of his hair.
 
“And there’s no official maps of the world, we’re using a compass that resets frequently and Nami’s brainpower to sail around on dangerous seas that are known for their unpredictable weather and extreme monsters,” you continued.
 
“That’s right,” Usopp said, now nibbling his lip.
 
“And there are several members of the crew, including the Captain, who can’t go into the sea or they’ll lose their will to live and drown. And there are huge bounties on all of you from the government of the world -”
 
“Well, the Marines, really -”
 
“And Robin is a former mobster, Zoro is a former bounty hunter, Brook is a twice over dead pirate who is now the top charting performer in the world, Chopper is a full reindeer and was trained by a quack doctor, and Franky turned himself into a cyborg who runs on coke. Did I get that all right?”
 
“Well, when you put it like that…”
 
“And Luffy - that Luffy” you said, pointing to the Captain who was currently picking his nose and wiping it on Chopper’s fur as the doctor worked, “will become a God in the near future, capable of bending reality to his whims.”
 
“Yes. Though now that it’s all laid out I feel like I’m getting sick,” Usopp confirmed while putting the back of his hand on his forehead. You had one more thought to clarify before you let the sniper go back to his duties. 
 
“Is Jinbei a mermaid?” you asked, your thoughts drifting to the helmsman as they had a few times that morning. Usopp laughed at you, making your face flush.
 
“H-hey! I’m not from here, how’m I s’posed to know these things?” you sputtered, putting the last of your things away.
 
“He’s not a mermaid, he’s a fishman. They’re kinda similar but separate species. He’s actually pretty famous, he was a Warlord for a long time but left them to join the crew when Luffy explained to him everything that happened. He’s really strong, he can control water, breathe underwater, knows fishman karate, he’s the best helmsman in the world, really respectful, yeah, Jinbei’s great,” Usopp trailed off after listing Jinbei’s qualities on his fingers. You added the information to your growing pile of Jinbei facts to be used in case you ever had an actual conversation with him.
 
“Alright, my guy. You’re all set, whaddya think?” you asked, handing Usopp a small mirror. He examined his appearance, giving his reflection a shy smile. “I think you look so handsome,” you said over his shoulder. He flushed a little but covered it quickly with a change of the subject. 
 
“Yeah, I mean but I’m more known for my fighting skills. Being handsome is nothing next to defeating 1,000 -” You cut off Usopp with a pinch to his cheek, pulling hard on his cute face.
 
“I’m off to piano lessons with Brook -I’ll be back later to do Nami’s hair. Maybe other crew’s too, if they want. Find me before you go to bed tonight, I’ll see if I have something for you to wrap your hair in,” you said, dismissing Usopp. You were nervous for your lesson with Brook, and not just because he was a nine foot tall living skeleton. You weren’t all that confident in your piano skills despite putting a lot of effort into practising over the last few years. And the piano on the ship was on the main deck - everyone was going to hear you if you made any mistakes. Crossing the deck to Brook’s piano, you saw he was the one playing the violin, his bone fingers deftly creating the tune everyone had been enjoying. You didn’t interrupt his performance but listened to the unfamiliar song as he continued to play. Ending on one long forlorn note, Brook lowered his bow as the note rang out in the air.
 
“Ah, Misty, thank you for joining me. Before we begin, may I -” you glowered at the skeleton in response to what you assumed his request would be. Maybe your angry face would stop him from asking to -
 
“-see your panties?” he continued in the exact vein you thought he would. You rolled your eyes.
 
“How can you see my panties if you have no eyes? And no,” you said dismissively, tossing your head with a saucy attitude. The skeleton looked at you for a moment then burst into a contagious laughter.
 
“YOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO, an excellent point! I enjoy those jokes myself. Now, let’s see where you are, would you like to warm up?” Brook said after wiping a tear from his eye, offering you his baby Grand Piano to play. 
 
And so, about an hour later, Brook was teaching you simplified music to the song he was playing previously, called “Bink’s Sake.” Despite his penchant for panties, Brook was an excellent piano teacher, even better than your old teacher Mrs. Howell. He was patient, kind, and you didn’t think anyone could know more about music theory than he did. After finishing the basic opening melody one more time, you sighed and rolled your head on your shoulders.
 
‘I apologize, I don’t think I have anything else in me right now,” you said, shutting the key lid as Brook lowered his bow.
 
“No need to apologize, I think you did excellently. I would love to hear any music you may know from your world. But perhaps another time,” the skeleton said with a bow.
 
“I have a feeling you’d like Billy Joel. But really, thank you, Brook,” you said, taking his bony hand in your own and patting it. Brook tilted his head but it was difficult to read his expression. 
 
“I’m sorry, do you not like being touched?” you asked, dropping his hand in case it made him uncomfortable.
 
“Not at all, I - I appreciate it,” he said in a quiet voice. You smiled and turned to head to Nami’s tangerine grove, where the redhead was tapping her foot in impatience for a haircut even as she smiled in anticipation. From one world to the next, there would always be

those

clients, you thought.
 
Sitting Nami down in a chair that was on the deck, you spoke to her about her preferences and what she was expecting out of her style. Brushing through her hair, you saw that whoever had been doing it previously was doing a pretty good job. They were obviously amateur but they had enough sense and skill to get it done quite well. 
 
“Nami, who usually cuts your hair?” you asked as you picked up your shears. Opening and shutting them a few times made you realize you’d need to sharpen them soon. Sanji probably had a whetstone or something you could use, he would have to sharpen his knives regularly as a chef. 
 
“Sanji does, he cuts everyone’s hair,” she explained, moving her head to gesticulate. Pointing her head back in the direction you needed you continued to cut her dead ends off.
 
“Seems like he does a lot around here,” you mused. No wonder Sanji smoked so much, you thought, the man was constantly working. Maybe you could show him some haircut pointers for after you died again. Just a few adjustments to his technique and he’d make a fine hairstylist, you thought.
 
“He does, but he likes it. You’ll see, he’ll be here in under 5 minutes offering us some kind of beverage and snack,” the redhead said with a shrug. “Wanna bet on it?” she asked with a grin. You declined-  Nami undoubtedly took in a lot of suckers but you wouldn’t be one of them. 
 
“So why did you want my pens? I think I have some more, I’ll have to dig around,” you said, not wanting to mix business and pleasure.
 
“If I don’t get pens from the Readers I have to go back to using a quill and ink for my maps which is so much worse. Messier, less legible, less precise, all around a pain in the ass. Generally I think your world seems like shit but you do have great pens,” Nami stated, moving her her for emphasis.
 
“You’re gonna have an uneven haircut if you don’t stop moving around,” you scolded her while redirecting her head and continuing to snip. As Nami had predicted, Sanji had come around with a serving tray with three deep red drinks and three plates of petit-fours. 
 
“For you, Mellorines,” he presented with a flourish. Nami took two drinks and handed one to you. 
 
“Thank you, Sanji,” she said as you took a sip. It was some kind of tropical juice, maybe watermelon mixed with passion fruit? You hadn’t had the flavor before but it was refreshing in the afternoon sun. A rubbery arm snaked around the nearest tangerine tree trunk to grab the third glass from behind but Sanji deftly kicked the Captain’s hand away without turning his attention away from you and Nami.
 
“Thank you Sanji, it’s delicious,” you said as Sanji preened. He had to shift to push the Captain’s face away with his foot as Luffy continued his attempts to eat the snacks. 
 
“It’s not FAIR!” Luffy whined, stomping his foot petulantly as he returned to his normal shape. “You always give Mellonades good snacks and never me! And I’m the Captain!”
 
“Mellorines, and OF COURSE I DO, they’re ladies! You don’t deserve them! I’ve seen you eat live bugs before!” Sanji yelled back, pulling the Captain’s ear like laffy taffy. You smiled as you worked on Nami’s hair - they were certainly a lively and entertaining bunch of folks to hang around. You didn’t know if you could do it long term but that wasn’t on the table anyway. 
 
“BUT I WOULDN’T IF YOU GAVE ME SNACKS!” Luffy insisted, launching to wrap himself around Sanji’s head. Nami continued talking, sharing some bits of information about the island you’d shortly be docking at. You started setting her hair in large curlers as it air dried - you really wished you had a hair dryer right about now. Maybe you could ask Franky to build you one. He clearly had a way with mechanics if he could power his own body on coca cola. You’d ask him later that night after you were done with the crew haircuts.
 
“Sanji, would you like me to show you a few pointers next time I cut someone’s hair? You’re doing a fantastic job, the crew all look wonderful. Since hairstyling is my main source of income, I can show you a few tricks to making the finished result look a little more cohesive? But only if you want. Like I said, you’re doing a phenomenal job already,” you explained, holding a tuft of Nami’s hair between your fingers. Sanji blushed so hard you thought blood was going to start coming out his nose. 
 
“Ah, that would be excellent, thank -” Sanji started before being cut off by Nami.
 
“Ha! Sanji got told he’s a good boy!” Nami pointed out, laughing without malice.
 
“He

is

a good boy,” you said with a firm nod to Sanji. The poor kid looked like he was going to pass out on the deck but no one seemed worried. Despite knowing him only a day or so, you could tell Sanji was a good kid. Sure, maybe he was a little fucked up, but who wasn’t? You trusted your instincts about people and they told you Sanji was a sweetheart.  
 
“Hey Luffy, can you show me some of your fighting moves? I’ve never seen any before but Usopp told me they’re really powerful” you asked while winding Nami’s hair around a large curler. Usopp hadn’t actually mentioned Luffy’s attacks but you thought it might change the subject and distract the Captain from annoying Sanji. The chef needed a break after all that work and teasing from the crew. 
 
“Oh yeah!! You’re gonna love this! Check this out – GUM GUM PISTOL!” Luffy yelled as he launched his arm towards the Crow’s Nest. Using the Crow’s Nest as a grounding point, he hurled himself into the air like a rubber band. It was kind of cool but you didn’t really see how it made him one of the strongest pirates on the seas like Usopp had said.
 
“LUFFY YOU FUCKING IDIOT! MAKE SURE YOU LAND ON THE BOAT!” Zoro yelled out from the Crow’s Nest. You watched Luffy turn into a small speck as he ascended higher and higher. Hopefully the kid had a good sense of his own limits, you thought, otherwise he’d be sinking to the bottom of the sea like Usopp had told you. As he descended rapidly you could hear Luffy’s childish laugh from where you stood as he slammed back down onto the deck, causing the ship to rock heavily to one side. The sensation wasn’t pleasant as your stomach turned with the large dip. You tried to think of something else to occupy the Captain so he didn’t do that again.
 
“What if Usopp shot things into the air and you tried to get them before they hit the deck?” you asked, already looking back down at Nami’s hair. It kind of reminded you of when your nieces showed you their “cool tricks,” which were mostly of them jumping off various surfaces and inevitably getting hurt. Luffy’s mouth and eyes opened wide as he threw his hands in the air.
 
“USOPP! COME SHOOT STUFF FOR ME!” 
 
“You know, this is just fetch,” Nami said to you quietly, turning her head from side to side in order to admire her hair in the mirror.
 
“Ha, yeah, I guess so. Does it matter? Look how happy he is -” you said, putting a bonnet over Nami’s hair for protection from getting wet while it set. 
 
“LUFFY NOT THE DISHES!” Nami yelled, already out of her chair with her fist raised to chastise the Captain - who had a plate in his hands. You couldn’t help but laugh - what a bunch of goobers. Deciding to offer cuts to the rest of the crew as a thank you for letting you stay with them for a few weeks, you looked around to see who was near. Robin was reading on a beach chair in the shade of a tree, turning pages with extra hands as she skimmed through the book.
 
“Robin, would you like a haircut?” you asked over the din of Luffy missing a ball Usopp had launched, the pair yelling and laughing. They’d been joined by Chopper who was watching Luffy stretch and jump to catch things with childish glee.
 
“No thank you, I’m content with the way it looks now,” she said with a smile and tilt of her head. “Besides, we are arriving at Widow’s Island momentarily. It will take the rest of us a few hours to get everything ready for departure from the ship but Luffy is likely to -”
 
“HEY! I CAN SEE THE ISLAND! WE’RE HERE!” Luffy yelled, immediately dropping the bowl he’d caught from Usopp’s last toss. Grabbing onto the mast, Luffy stretched himself backwards like Usopp’s slingshot.
 
“He’s not gonna -” 
 
“He is. It’s quite alright, he’s done this many times before,” Robin said calmly, a hand placing a bookmark between the pages she was reading. “Don’t worry, Jinbei, Sanji or Zoro will save him if he miscalculates his trajectory,” Robin continued, as if the Captain drowning was no big matter.
 
“Yeah, Usopp told me about Devil Fruits and drowning. That’s quite the price to pay for someone who spends their life on the seas,” you mused. You began cleaning and putting away your tools as the rest of the crew prepared the ship for docking. You’d help with whatever they needed as soon as you were done but everything had to be put away properly first.
 
“Mm. It’s not so bad, Luffy falls into the water most often. I haven’t once since I ate my fruit,” Robin said, handing her book to a hand that put it on a nearby shelf.
 
“I think Brook would have the worst time with falling in the water, no? I mean, he doesn’t have to breathe so it’s not like he’d drown. The rest of you would be dead in what - 5 minutes tops? That’s not as bad as Brook, who would drift down to the bottom of the ocean, slowly being crushed by the immense pressure of the water as he descended into pure darkness where not even a single ray of light could penetrate the inky depths. He’d be pulverized slowly over the course of months, maybe years, unable to see or hear or move as he waits for death in a sealed watery tomb. That would be worse, right?” you mused, thinking through the implications of drowning as a living skeleton. Robin nodded solemnly as she listened.
 
“I’ve never thought about it that way, but you’re quite right! Don’t fall in Brook,” she warned the musician with a light laugh, who was slack jawed with shock along with Chopper and Usopp. He took a step back from the side of the ship towards the middle of the deck.
 
“What? I’m just saying...and uh, Jinbei, Sanji or Zoro would save you before that happened so…don’t worry?” you hesitated as Brook slammed his jaw shut.
 
“I think you and I will become friends,” Robin said, putting a disembodied hand on your shoulder. 
 
“I’d like that,” you said with a smile even as the Thing-like arm unnerved you and patted your back. 
 
You looked over and Luffy had his arms stretched out the length of the ship, his feet hooked on the back railing as he prepared to fling himself. Looking over at you, he smiled widely. You could see why he’d attracted so many people - he had a strange kind of charisma that drew people in. 
 
“You’ll be here tonight, right? To tell me the next part of the story about Oz?” he asked, still holding the mast.
 
“Uh, yeah, I mean, I - where else would I go?” you asked, confused. 
 
“I dunno, sometimes Nami and Robin stay at hotels on islands but I don’t like to. Alright, you, me n’ Jinbe! It’s a date! Bye! YAHOOOOOOOO -” Luffy yelled, finally releasing his arms and catapulting himself to the island. Based on the sand cloud that appeared on the far away beach, he’d made it there safely. Or at least hadn’t landed in the water. You blushed lightly at the Captain’s choice of words but he didn’t mean anything by it.
 
“It is my turn to guard the ship and I too prefer sleeping on the ship - it is closest to the water. I shall be here to hear your story,” Jinbe said with a smile from his post by the helm. You didn’t know if Luffy had engineered the situation by chance or by choice but you would enjoy spending the time together regardless.