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Back in their first year they meet, and Tooru is instantly smitten. He’s told that nearly everyone who meets Sugawara Koshi falls a little in love with him. He’s also told to guard his heart. That’s all. No backstory, no reason why. Every time he crosses paths with Sugawara, the boy is just so sweet and caring and, and, well he’s definitely beautiful. How could he guard his heart when he can’t see anything especially bad to guard it against?
He’s careful, at first. It’s easier that they go to different schools, but it doesn’t keep them from crossing paths around town after school or on weekends. Little by little, they get to know each other. Favorite places, things, and common interests. And little by little, Tooru’s hold on his heart begins to slip.
Sugawara is endlessly fascinating to him, from the top of his silver head, to his pretty hazel eyes, the little beauty mark just under his left eye, his cheerful laughter, and his warm friendly smile. Tooru can’t help but want to be near him.
He finds himself thinking about Sugawara constantly, telling his friends everything about him. His concentration in class falters, but he redeems himself to his sensei in make-up work. He’s reprimanded during practice for the same reason, but he stays an hour later to make it up to Coach. And at night, his dreams are filled with Sugawara.
Little by little, Tooru falls in love.
It’s during their second year when Tooru realizes something’s wrong. At first, he thinks it’s just a chest cold, something to blame on the fluctuating temps of spring.
But it doesn’t go away. Not completely.
He feels his chest tighten with every breath, his cough is deep and painful. One day, after a particularly rough spell, he coughs up a few drops of blood... and a single, pale pink, flower petal. Fear causes him to freeze for a moment, but then he brushes the petal away, wipes the blood off his hand, and resumes his day like nothing ever happened.
He continues to meet Suga at the community center where they help coach the younger kids playing volleyball. Screws up the courage to ask him to the movies, out to eat. Sometimes they just toss a ball over the net to each other, talking like they always do. His devotion endures.
The symptoms persist.
A lone petal becomes two, three, four. Soon, he’s coughing up more blood and whole flowers, feels them blooming in his chest. His friends find out, but he tells them he’s fine. Really. But please don’t tell anyone. He’s not an idiot; he knows what’s happening to him. Knows he’s afflicted with hanahaki disease. Which means that Suga doesn’t feel the same for him, doesn’t love him, at least not an all-consuming love like he feels.
Still, he can’t bring himself to stop seeing Suga, to be in his orbit, to love and care for him even if it’s just one-sided.
Things become worse.
He can’t eat, can’t sleep. His breathing is shallow and labored. His chest hurts constantly. Coach is forced to bench him and his sensei calls his parents. After one particularly nasty episode at school, he’s rushed to the hospital. In the ER, he’s examined thoroughly and immediately admitted to the ICU. He’s fitted with a mask to force air into his lungs. He slips in and out of consciousness until he finally stays under.
A decision is made.
In order to save him, his parents order the operation that will clear the flowers from his lungs, and the memories from his mind. The operation is long and arduous, but successful. He’s kept in a medically induced coma so doctors can monitor his recovery around the clock. Medicine is administered to help heal his internal wounds from the flowers. A blood infusion is given to replace what he lost. He stays in a coma until they’re sure he can breathe on his own and no sign of hanahaki remains.
His convalescence is spent at home, his time taken up by his family and friends, all of them sharing their own memories with him. No one leaves him completely alone. When he’s better, he’s still kept home, but now he’s making up for lost time with his school work, and regains his strength with extra volleyball practice. He doesn’t go back to the community center, goes to different parks, and hangs out with his friends and teammates. In the eyes of everyone he knows, he’s back to normal. Back to the Tooru he was before meeting Sugawara Koshi, before falling in love with someone out of his reach.
He doesn’t remember Sugawara Koshi.
The next time they meet, it’s their third year. All Tooru knows about Karasuno is that the volleyball team was once fit to go to Nationals, but had fallen from grace, unable to live up to their own legacy. They’re good, but usually land somewhere in the middle ranks. They’re nothing to Aoba Johsai.
After their practice match, he waits for them at the gate. His friends all try to stop him, but he feels compelled. He’s all arrogance and confidence, telling them they have potential and that maybe they’ll have a chance to beat Seijoh. He goads his rival Tobio-chan for good measure.
But before he leaves, Tooru’s eyes connect with the silver-haired boy standing just a step behind their captain. There’s something within that hazel gaze that captures him, and his feet pause. The boy smiles, a cheerful smile, like he’s happy to see him again. But as Tooru stands there, looking down at him, the smile fades into confusion, and then sadness. Or disappointment. He can’t figure out which.
Still, the boy sighs, his smile is a little less bright now, and he follows his team as they leave. Tooru doesn’t move, or rather, he fights the compulsion to follow. His heart is racing, his mind is scrambling. He doesn’t know why, but he’s sure it has to do with that boy. But why? He doesn’t know him, has no memory of ever knowing him. Why is every fiber of his being crying out, urging him to follow that boy?
His friends catch up to him, fuss at him for taunting Karasuno. They try to steer him away, to bring him back to the gym, but he’s motionless, frozen, unable to step forward. Rather, he’s taking a step back, and then another, breaking free of their hands as they try to stop him. One of them grabs his jacket, and he breaks free of that, leaving the jacket behind.
He races after the boy, hoping he hasn’t left yet. Surely he can explain why he feels this way, since it’s his fault he’s even feeling these feelings. He rounds the corner, and sees the van driving away. He’s too late. Figures. He hitches his hands on his hips and bows his head. It would be better if he just forgets the whole thing and concentrates on his grades and Interhigh.
Scrubbing his hands through his hair and over his face, he turns back, only to stop in his tracks again. The silver-haired boy stands there, watching him. There’s no sunny smile and his eyes are slightly narrowed, searching. Tooru isn’t sure if he’s angry or something else, but he waits.
It’s clear the boy wants to say something, mouth opening and then closing several times without a sound. He clasps his hands together, perhaps in an effort to warm them. A nervous gesture. Not something Tooru should know, but he does. And he wants to know more.
“You don’t remember me, do you?” the boy asks quietly.
“No. Should I?”
His silver head bows, as if in defeat, but comes back up again, eyes bright and determined.
“They told me you were sick, that you were spitting up blood and flowers. That you were in love with me, and that it would be better if I stay away from you.”
“Why would they tell you that? And who are ‘they’?”
“Your friends, mostly. Your family... and mine.”
“Okay? But I don’t even know you. Why would they keep you away from me?”
“You almost died, Oikawa. Because of me.”
He’s answering the questions, but somehow, it feels like he isn’t answering them at all.
“Look, I’m sorry,” the boy says softly. “I have to go.”
He starts to walk by, stepping around him to get away. But Tooru quickly reaches out, grasping his arm.
“Please. I don’t understand.”
“It’s better if you don’t. Let me go.”
“Tell me! Please.”
There is a long, heavy silence between them, and he’s incredibly frustrated. Nothing’s making sense at all. Tooru begins to think he won’t get an answer at all, until the boy speaks.
“We were friends… before. We met in our first year. We spent almost all our free time together, and grew closer. And somewhere in the middle of it all, you fell in love with me.”
A quiet scoff came from him and Tooru looked down at his face, soft with fond remembrance.
“The thing was, I knew how you felt for me, and I didn’t know what to do, or how to tell you that I fell in love with you, too. I guess you could say I was scared. I thought that if I confessed my feelings it would mess up our friendship and I didn’t want to lose you as a friend. My best friend. So I didn’t say anything at all. I didn’t know…”
He gently wrenches his arm free of Tooru’s grasp and takes a few steps away.
“I need to go.”
“No! Wait, please. What’s your name?”
“I shouldn’t tell you, it might put you at risk…”
Tooru isn't used to begging, but everything in him yearns to know more. Including his name. Even if there’s a risk of relapse.
“Just... please. Tell me.”
“My name is Sugawara Koshi. But you have to forget me. Forget what I told you. Forget my name.”
But it’s too late. His heart fumbles in his chest. Vague memories rise up as if they were buried in dense fog.
He remembers that name!
“Suga,” he starts to say, but finds himself alone. The boy, no, Sugawara Koshi, is gone.
Tooru races to the corner and looks everywhere, but can’t find Suga. Turning an about-face, he frantically runs to the opposite corner. Nothing. Unwilling to admit defeat, he rushes back to school grounds, and practically barrels into his friends.
“Whoa! Hey, watch it!” Iwa shouts, holding on while he catches his balance.
“What’s wrong?” Makki turns to ask, reaching out to help.
“Nothing. Everything. I have to find him!”
“Him who?” Matsun replies, concern written on his face. They’re all concerned, Tooru realizes. But that doesn’t matter now.
“Suga! He’s gone and I don’t know where…”
It takes them all a few moments to process what he said, but then they leap into action, attempting to distract him, to lure him back to the gym. They have Interhigh coming up and if they intend to exact their revenge and beat Shiratorizawa...
But Tooru doesn’t hear a word. He tells them to go on without him, reclaims his jacket, and then races off again, ignoring their calls to come back.
Memories flood his mind, as if the dam holding them back had burst. Meeting Suga, spending time with him, falling in love. He also remembers the blood and flower petals, almost dying, and waking up cured, but not whole. His family and friends meant well; they saved his life. But it’s only a half life. He won’t be whole again until he finds Suga. Everything is different, now that he knows his feelings aren’t unrequited, that Suga loves him, too.
He has to find him, to get him back. To finally confess to the boy he fell in love with during their first year.
So he runs. Runs as if his life depends on finding Suga. Because it does. Not because he fears relapse, but because he can’t bear to think of his life without Suga.
He has to find him. He just has to.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
His heart hurts.
His legs hurt.
His breathing saws in and out of his lungs.
The scars stretch painfully across his chest.
But he keeps running.
Running. Running. Running.
Even when he wants to run back.
He can’t. He just… can’t.
Koshi hates that he said anything to Oikawa. He should’ve just kept his mouth shut, left with the team, left well enough alone. But he had to find out if it was true; that the boy he fell in love with, the one he knew in his heart was his person, his soulmate, had truly forgotten him. It took everything he had in him to not react to the pain he felt when he realized there was not an ounce of recognition in those beautiful brown eyes. Just confusion and maybe mild annoyance. That hurt worse than the new scars lacing across his skin.
He could feel another scar forming over his heart, though old scar tissue. The pain was too much, and he answered Oikawa’s questions without much thought. But he got away, left him standing there, and hid until he thought it was safe to come out again. And then he ran.
He’s running back to Karasuno, or so he thinks. It’s difficult running when tears blur your vision, but he’s confident he knows the way. Besides, if Hinata and Kageyama could run all the way to Shiratorizawa, then surely he can run from Seijoh to Karasuno, right? Unfortunately, running as fast as he can doesn’t mean he can out-run memories. And those are still too much to bear.
“What’s going on?”
The head nurse stood up from her desk in a rush, after hanging up the phone in a clatter.
“Hanahaki patient. They’re bringing him in.”
Koshi gasped. “Hanahaki?”The disease wasn’t as uncommon as most people thought, and he’d heard that more than once, an unfortunate soul passed away as a result. “Is it bad?”
“Yeah.” She glanced at her watch and then gave him a tight grin. “You should head home, hun. Thanks for helping us out today.”
“No problem,” he shrugged off her thanks and began gathering up his stuff. “See you tomorrow?”
A doctor rushed in and started asking questions, barking orders. Koshi never did get his answer from her, but it didn’t matter. He’d show up after practice anyway. He had nothing better to do, after all.
He started volunteering at the hospital a couple weeks ago when Oikawa stopped coming to the community center. Koshi didn’t see him at any of their favorite haunts, either. And when he asked Oikawa’s friends, even his little nephew Takeru, they never gave him a straight answer. It felt like they did it on purpose. Like they were hiding something.
But why?
No one knew how much he loved Oikawa. Well, Daichi figured it out. And his parents. But, he’d kept his feelings to himself. Too new, too strong, to just blurt them out. Who comes right out and says ‘I love you,’ to someone you just met?
Not including Tanaka.
It’s right as he’s leaving when the ER doors burst open. Paramedics rush in with a gurney between them, yelling out vitals and stats. Curious, Koshi watched them head for the nearest trauma room. It happened so fast, but there was just enough time for him to recognize the patient. And his heart dropped to his feet.
“Oikawa?” he whispered, coming back to the desk.
Just behind the paramedics, his friends crowded in, framed like bodyguards around who Koshi assumed were Oikawa’s parents. Until one of them spotted him. Hanamaki glared at him and broke from the group, moving toward him before Matsukawa grabbed the back of his shirt and shoved him back in the wake of Oikawa’s gurney, muttering something to keep him moving.
“Stay there! Don’t come any closer!”
Oikawa’s best friend, Iwaizumi, blocked his way forward. Koshi was more confused by all this than frightened, so he stood his ground.
“Why?”
“You need to leave.”
He was warned in no uncertain terms.
“But, I…”
“No! Just leave, Sugawara.”
“But…”
“He’s here because of you. He’s dying,” his voice broke on the last word, his expression disgusted, “because of you.”
That stunned him, forcing him to back away. He almost tripped, he moved so quickly.
“Me?”
Iwaizumi said nothing, just stared at him balefully. Oikawa's other two friends joined him, Hanamaki stubbornly refusing to not be left out, all three forming a wall between him and Oikawa. That’s when the first painful scar sliced into his skin, over his heart. He wanted to cover the pain, hand to his heart. He wanted to scream, it hurt so much. But he held himself still, and didn't want to show his pain to them. He doubted they’d believe him, anyway.
“Just go, Sugawara,” Matsukawa said, gently yet firmly. At least he was showing a little kindness, a little sympathy. Koshi silently thanked him for that.
But the message was received, loud and clear. Not wanting to cause any more of a scene than they already had, he bowed and left.
He's still running. The tears keep falling. He should be near Karasuno by now, but he doesn’t know. Of course, it’s his body that decides when to stop. Suddenly, he finds himself on his back, down the embankment, one foot in the chill water of the river. He can’t recall exactly how he fell, but here he is.
“SUGA!!”
He doesn’t answer. He can’t. But he knows who calls him, feeling both relieved and disappointed. Moving hurts, but once again he’s not completely in control of his body. Painfully, he rolls to his side, dry heaving, though there isn’t much he can bring up. He can hear the heavy bracing footsteps of Daichi approaching fast downhill toward him.
“Suga! Are you okay? That was a nasty fall.”
His friend lowers himself to his knees and gently tries to help him up.
“Stop, stop! God, it hurts!”
Immediately, Daichi halts, still holding on to him while he’s on his hands and knees, until he manages to sit on his backside.
“Anything broken?”
“I don’t know,” he replies. “I don’t think so.”
Right after saying that, pain sharp and deep slashes across his chest. He hisses, grasps the area over his heart, and doubles over. Daichi’s hand is gentle, rubbing circles on his back.
“Another scar?”
Koshi nods once.
“How many today?”
“T-two, maybe. I lost count.”
“The first at Seijoh?”
Koshi groans, but affirms with another nod of his head.
“During that pretentious little speech by Oikawa?”
“Y-yeah. How did you…?”
“I’ve learned to recognize the signs,” Daichi answers easily, a tiny grin tipping his lips upward. “You whined.”
Koshi snorts. “I did not.”
“Alright, you didn’t. But I could still tell. Now, do you think you can stand? We need to get you to the clinic…”
“No!” he cries, grabbing the sleeve of Daichi’s jacket. “No. I’m fine.”
“I don’t believe you.”
“Some best friend you are,” he snarks. “I’m used to it.” The pain lessens and he slowly straightens up. “I’m fine, Daichi. Besides, my legs are jelly. I’m not going anywhere.”
Daichi chuckles and lets the matter drop, but he scrutinizes him closely before turning to look out over the river. He is such a steady presence, a rock, and Koshi is entirely grateful that they met in their first year. The silence between them is comfortable, comforting, and he doesn’t feel a need to fill it with mindless chatter. Or explanations. Once the pain from the newest scar lessens, he scoots closer to Daichi, leans forward, and rests his head against Daichi’s shoulder.
“Wanna talk about it?” his best friend asks quietly.
“Yeah. But not right now.”
“Okay.”
Peace and quiet settled between them again.
There are still times when Koshi wonders why he couldn’t have fallen in love with Daichi instead of Oikawa. Friends and fellow classmates alike never fail to ask them why they aren’t together, why they haven’t
been
together since they’ve met. Admittedly, Daichi isn’t hard to look at, has a gorgeous smile, and has a way that tempers Koshi’s chaotic streaks before they go wildly out of control. Oh, he’s the first to say he loves Daichi, but it’s different from the love he has for Oikawa. It’s never easy to explain, so they don’t. They’ve become the couple voted “Most Likely To Be Forever Friends” in their class yearbook.
But… Daichi isn’t Oikawa. In Koshi’s mind, that makes all the difference. He
loves
Oikawa. Deeply, unconditionally, irrevocably in love with him. Another slash of pain, and Koshi whined. Audibly, this time. Daichi carefully turned to face him. He says nothing, just waits. Patient, steady, kind-hearted, content-with-life-as-it-is Daichi.
“I love him,” he whispers, teeth clenched through the pain. “I love him so much.”
“Does he know?”
Koshi chuckles breathlessly.
“He does now. But what good will it do when he’s forgotten me?”
“Forgotten you? How could he…”
His voice trails off as another voice echoes past them.
“SUGA?!”
Daichi turns and faces the new arrival, as if he were going to protect him. Instead, Daichi moves slowly, first to his knees and then to his feet. He turns around and bends down to take Koshi’s hands and pulls him up, hanging on to him until he can stand on his own.
“A little advice,” Daichi murmurs as Oikawa races up, and then bends over double, hands on knees, taking in huge gulps of air. “Don’t run away. This might be your best and only chance to confess for real. And it might just save you both.”
“But, what if it doesn’t?” Koshi could hear the fear in his voice. “I caused his hanahaki in the first place! He’s had the operation! He doesn’t remember…”
“I remember you,” Oikawa says between breaths. “I remember you, Suga.”
Both Daichi and Koshi stare at him as he straightens up, his big brown eyes focused only on Koshi. They stand like that for who knows how long before Daichi’s attention is pulled beyond Oikawa’s shoulder. His face taken on a stern, almost angry mien, and he turns quickly to Koshi, patting him gently on the shoulder.
“I'll intercept them. You stay here.”
He runs off to stop Iwaizumi, Matsukawa, and Hanamaki. Seeing them again adds to the fear mounting in his heart. This can only lead to another confrontation; they’re only trying to protect Tooru. He completely understands, and honestly, he wants to do the same. Tooru doesn’t need someone who can’t tell him how he feels. Doesn’t deserve someone too scared to admit his feelings out loud. Still, Koshi watches Daichi go, surprised to see Asahi and Narita joining him. They must’ve come at some point while Daichi was helping him, or came with Daichi but stayed away. Koshi doesn’t know, nor care, as he returns his attention to Tooru, who hasn’t stopped staring at him. He takes a deep breath, tries to swallow his fear, and finally speaks.
“You remember me?”
Tooru nods frantically.
“Yeah. Everything. How we met, where we’d hang out… Everything.”
“But, how? I thought the surgery…”
“It worked. My memories of you were gone. My friends and family did all they could to make certain I didn’t remember. Everything went according to plan. For all intents and purposes, the surgery was successful.”
“But how…?”
“When I saw you standing right behind your captain, I felt this strange sensation in my head. Like something was stuck and trying to come loose. I saw the look in your eyes, the smile on your face, like you knew who I was. Each passing moment, the sensation grew stronger, like, I knew there was something about you that I just couldn’t remember, but wanted to. Then, you told me your part of the story, and finally your name, and that something in my mind finally broke free.”
He takes a deep breath, lets it out slowly, and takes a step closer. Koshi fights the urge to retreat, to take a step back, to run away. Somehow, Oikawa notices and quickly takes hold of his hands, lacing their fingers together. Koshi’s heart thrills from the simple contact, the way Oikawa holds his hands with such calm assurance, and also letting him know he could break free if he chooses.
“Please don’t run away. Not again.”
“I-I don’t want to,” he whispers. “But I can’t…” his breath catches in his throat. “I can’t…”
His vision goes blurry with fresh tears, and another new scar slashes his skin. His hands grip Oikawa’s hard and he tries not to double over in pain.
“Koshi? Are you okay?”
“No,” he replies sharply. But he fights through the pain lashing his body and looks up at the love of his life. The only love he will ever know. “I can’t hurt you anymore, Tooru. I don’t want you to relapse.”
Another scar forms and this one takes the cake. He screams and falls to his knees. Tooru does the same, fear and concern in his voice as he gathers Koshi up in his arms, holding him tightly. Being held like this by Tooru is all he ever wanted.
“The only way that’ll happen,” he whispers into Koshi’s hair, “is if you run away from me again. Or say you don’t love me like I love you.”
“But I do love you! I have since the day we met!” Koshi says, his soul crying out for Tooru to understand. And then it hits him.
“Wait. You… love me?”
Tooru leans back and nods a bit sheepishly.
“I do. I always have. Since the day we met,” he repeats quietly. “I may have forgotten for a little while, but I remember now.”
Tooru reaches up to gently wipe the tears from his face, brush his fingers through his hair, and smile fondly at him. Koshi never thought he’d ever see him look so beautiful in his life. New tears fall, but these are happy tears, and Tooru chuckles as he bends closer to kiss each one away. Each kiss moves closer to Koshi’s lips, until finally, softly, Tooru kisses him properly.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Daichi sits down on a nearby bench on the trail at the top of the embankment, taking a deep breath and exhaling slowly. To say he feels an enormous sense of relief is a massive understatement. What he thought would be a huge confrontation merely ended with the sight of the two at the bottom of the embankment. Surprise in various degrees echoes on each face, and then Oikawa’s three friends look relieved, as well. They’re concerned for their best friend and captain, that’s totally understandable. Asahi and he are just as concerned for Suga, though he’s pretty sure they wouldn’t have kept Oikawa from him if their situations were reversed.
Beside him sits Iwa, for once not looking so angry. Still concerned. They all are. But just like Daichi, his eyes frequently lock on the pair below them, and then away again, with a faint blush coloring his cheeks. He sits with his hands linked behind his head, one of his legs bouncing with nervous energy. It shook the bench that it took Daichi all his power of will to not reach out and clamp his hand on Iwa’s thigh and stop it. He could tell he wanted to go down there, but also knows he can’t. The situation was out of his control, and he isn’t happy about it, but this is what Oikawa wants. Suga is what Oikawa wants, so there’s really nothing Iwaizumi could do about any of it.
There is only one thing Daichi still cannot understand.
“Why did you stop him?”
He doesn’t answer right away, just exhales as if he’d been holding his breath. Daichi waits patiently, but it seems as if Iwa isn’t going to say anything. He looks over to see Asahi and Narita chatting quietly with Matsukawa and Hanamaki, who are also keeping an eye on Oikawa, and watching for any sign from Iwaizumi to do something. They are all on their guard. It’s not the most optimal situation, but at least no one is going down there to interrupt Oikawa and Suga. But, contrary to what everyone believes about Daichi, he does have his limits, and he’s just about reached one of them. He’s about to ask again, but Iwa stops him.
“All I knew was that Oikawa was in love with Suga. He’d go on and on about Suga, and he was just so smitten.”
Daichi nods and smiles. It had been the same with Suga, though there was always a degree of uncertainty around him that Daichi couldn’t decipher. Not until the day he came home from his volunteer job at the hospital.
“Until something between them happened,” Iwa continues quietly, “though he never said what it was. It was like a bright light was slowly dimming. We didn’t even know he had come down with hanahaki until he had an attack on the way home from practice. He tried to hide the flower petals from us, but we saw them. And the blood. He was hurting, Daichi,” he says, and there’s pain in his voice.
“So you decided to keep Suga away?”
“Yeah. He is, well, he
was
the source of the problem. He
hurt
Oikawa, and Oikawa was
dying
. I couldn’t let him be anywhere near my best friend.”
Daichi understands. He does. Hearing it from Iwa’s point of view, he can sympathize and probably relate. Though, if he had been in the same situation, he still didn’t think he’d stop Oikawa from being close to Suga. Someone that determined has to have a reason only they know. And as far as he knows, neither of them would ever hurt the other under any circumstances. Not knowingly, anyway. Then, something else occurs to him.
“That must be when it started,” he muses quietly. Or perhaps not too quietly, since Iwaizumi hears him.
“When what started?”
Daichi exhales and scrubs a hand through his hair. He hadn’t meant to say that, though he explains anyway.
“Scars form on his body when he’s distressed, and he’s usually distressed when he thinks about Oikawa, which is all the time. I knew something was going on with him when he started doing more and more to keep busy. More practice, more schoolwork, volunteering at the hospital, actively seeking out friends to hang out with. Just… more. He’d even go so far as to exhaust himself so that when he slept, he wouldn’t dream about Oikawa.”
“And you think it started when…”
“When you, Matsukawa, and Hanamaki essentially ganged up on him and kept him away from Oikawa.” He pauses and turns so he can look at Iwa properly. “I don’t know everything, only what Suga’s told me since I found out about his scars, but what I do know… what I’m absolutely certain of… is that Suga is, and always has been, in love with Oikawa.”
Iwa’s arms come down and he fiddles with his fingers in his lap. The leg slows down, and he takes a few deep breaths, calming himself. It was hard enough to keep his attention off Suga and Oikawa, just for privacy’s sake, but now he was trying not to stare at Iwa.
“In love, huh?” Iwa says quietly. “How long…”
He is cut off by a scream that echoes past them. Iwa is immediately on his feet, as is Daichi, and the others are instantly at the ready close by. All of them are focused on the two below them, now on their knees. Seconds later, Oikawa is holding Suga in his arms, fingers tangling in silver hair.
Iwa makes a move toward them, but Daichi is quick to stop him, reaching out to grasp his wrist. He feels that zing again, not unlike the other times before, and Iwa tears his gaze away from Oikawa and Suga to stare at him. Rather than let go as if the contact burns, Daichi keeps his hold loose, easy to break free, if need be.
“The surgery,” Iwa muttered, still a little confused. “It took so long to remove all the flowers suffocating him. And after, we spent so much time making sure his memories were gone. Did all we could to fill in what was missing.”
Daichi chuckles and looks down at the pair, now kissing like long-lost lovers. Well, perhaps they are, after all.
“Yet, even after everything we did…” Iwa’s gaze softens. “He was never completely happy. He even said he felt like something was missing. Something precious, something important. He just couldn’t figure out what it was.”
“Until we came,” Daichi says.
Iwa shrugs, and the tiniest of smiles tips his lips.
“It’s not something I’m sure I’ll ever understand,” he admits softly. “I’m afraid the flowers will come back.”
“I don’t think they will,” Daichi offers. “And Suga’s scars will heal, eventually. They’ll be fine.”
Reluctantly, he lets go of Iwa’s wrist and sits down on the bench. After another few minutes, Iwa follows, sitting closer than before.
“I still don’t understand how…” Iwa seems to be at a loss, frustration lacing his voice. “And I don’t understand at all how you’ve been so calm through this whole ordeal.”
Daichi takes his eyes off the pair below, who are seated by the water, Suga’s back against Oikawa’s front, nestled comfortably in the circle of Oikawa’s arms. The tears are gone, they’re talking, working things out, smiling so sweetly at each other, and they’re holding hands, fingers twined. Daichi knows that their world consists of only them. Nothing and no one else exists. It’s clear they love each other so much that not even hanahaki, or Suga’s mysterious scars, could keep them apart. He’d had to see it for himself before being able to even put a name to what they have, besides each other. With one last glance, he turned and focused on Hajime.
“They’re soulmates,” he says seriously. Hajime’s eyes widen fractionally as he lets that sink in. “While Suga didn’t use that word specifically, he’d told me in our first year that he’d found his person. The only one in the world meant for him and him alone. And seeing them together now, I believe it.”
“Soulmates,” Hajime whispers. “So that’s…?”
“Part of it, yes,” Daichi answers. “Their bond was never completely severed, even after the surgery. Yes, for a time, Oikawa ‘forgot’ Suga. The thing is, even without having admitted it to each other, their love is what kept their bond intact.” He pauses to see if Hajime is on the same page, and continues. “It’s called agape,” he explains. “A love so strong, nothing and no one can break it. So pure, unconditional… eternal. That’s what they have. Oikawa seeing Suga again at the practice match was just the catalyst, really. I believe Oikawa would’ve remembered Suga eventually, even if we hadn’t come to your school.”
Hajime huffs, a lop-sided grin on his face.
“Quite philosophical of you, Dai.”
“It’s true, though.”
“I suppose you’re right.” Hajime winks at him and then moves to stand up, looking back expectantly. “Think they’ll notice we’re gone?”
“I doubt they’ll notice the sun setting,” Daichi replies sardonically. “If anything, they’ll move when it’s dark, and they’re hungry.”
Hajime chuckles and they start walking toward the rest of their friends.
“Speaking of hungry, want to get some yakiniku?”
Daichi smiles.
“I’d like that.”