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When that scavenger girl had defeated him in a fight and then ran away with his Grandfather’s lightsaber, Kylo Ren had wanted to die. He hadn’t made it very far before collapsing from his wounds. Lying in the snow as the planet was collapsing it seemed like finally one of his wishes would come true. He would die in the forest that was as dark and frozen as his heart and nobody would mourn for him. Maybe his mom would regret not having been nicer to him when he was a kid. Not that it mattered, it was too late now.But then General Hux had come to rescue him even though he hated Kylo and probably only did it because Snoke said so.“Leave me to die” Kylo Ren had said.“Get up you useless piece of shit” Hux yelled to him and kicked his wounded side.Kylo Ren yelped at the pain but Hux just kept kicking him, like he was taking out his frustration about losing the Starkiller on Kylo. Like it was his fault.“Pull me up” Kylo said and Hux grabbed him and roughly forced him on his feet. Hux dragged him to a ship that was waiting to evacuate them.Hux always looked like he had a stick up his ass but now he was furious and his normally immaculate copper hair was a mess. His eyes said “say one word and I’ll throw you out of this ship” so Kylo closed his eyes and focused on slowly bleeding all over the place until he lost consciousness. ********************* After the destruction of the Starkiller Base Hux hadn’t seen Kylo Ren. This didn’t bother him as the man only made his work more difficult. In fact, everyone was in better mood now that Kylo had disappeared. The stormtroopers especially looked more relaxed.The new radar technician on the other hand, Matt or whatever his name was, had been popping up a lot lately.Hux hated Matt. What a fucking nerd , he thought. Matt was always creeping around like some sex offender and he obviously sucked at his job. When Matt had come to fix his computer, it had caught on fire when Hux tried to turn it on. Hux would’ve taken Matt’s stupid wench and beaten him to death with it right then except he couldn’t find him anymore.Hux had told Kylo Ren many times to get rid of Matt permanently but of course that immature fool hadn’t done anything. Probably too busy getting his ass kicked by little girls. When he passed by Matt he saw him getting scolded by a female stormtrooper.I bet you’ve never gotten laid Matt, he thought. No chick would be into him. Making out with Matt would be the worst.Matt was standing still and looking at his feet like a child as the stormtrooper continued to complain to him about some new failure. Matt looked annoyed.“Stop yelling at me!” Matt snapped.Phasma noticed them from across the room and came to see what was going on.“What is this about?” she demanded to know.“Captain, Matt was supposed to change the light bulb on the elevator “ the stormtrooper explained “but instead he broke the elevator somehow! I was stuck there for three hours.”Phasma turned to face Matt. Hux didn’t need to see her face to know she was as sick of that little nerd as he was.“I keep hearing about you” Phasma said. Then she started listing all the complaints she had gotten about him.Matt looked like he was going to throw a hissy fit. For a second something about him seemed strangely familiar but Hux pushed that thought away and focused on enjoying Matt’s humiliation.“I will give you one more chance” Phasma said much to Hux’s disappointment “The hologram communication systems need some fine-tuning. If you can fix that maybe I will let you live.”“Well in that case it sounds like I’ll have to re-calibrate the core plasma conduits” Matt said angrily and grabbed a hammer. Then he turned and walked away.Hux had a bad feeling about this. ********************* That night Kylo Ren was asleep when suddenly a bright light woke him up. He opened his eyes and saw a man hovering above his bed, except he was transparent, like a ghost. The man had a perfect muscular body and all he was wearing was a white cloth covering his naughty places. His hair was wavy and golden like honey and so shiny it looked like halo. He looked like a beautiful angel that had once been good but then fallen and had his wings burned off, maybe in lava.“Is that you Granpa?” Kylo asked.“Yes, it’s me” said Anakin Skywalker “I came to warn you so you wont repeat my mistakes.”“Really?” asked Kylo “Will you tell me how to finally become strong enough to free myself from the temptation of the Light Side? Will you tell me how to not be defeated like you?”Kylo was excited. Deep down inside he had always known that if he just talked enough to that helmet one day Darth Vader would answer his prayers. He looked even cooler than Kylo had imagined.“No Grandson. You must abandon the Dark Side” Anakin’s ghost said.Kylo Ren felt like he had been slapped. The words were like shards of a broken dream, cutting into him.“You are lying!” shouted Kylo angrily. He got up from his bed.“If you don’t go to Light Side you will soon be dead like me”, Anakin warned.“Nooo!!!”, Kylo shouted. He took his mask and put it on and turned on his unique lightsaber that was like a red, satanic cross. “YOU ARE NOT MY GRANPA!”Kylo started to wildly swing his lightsaber at Anakin. But it only passed through him. Kylo cut Anakin’s lean, glimmering abs, but nothing happened. He tried to cut off his head and then cut of his legs but it was in vain. Anakin looked at Kylo Ren with pitiful eyes as his Grandson trashed around in rage.“Remember… do not give into the hate… go to the Light Side…” Anakin’s words echoed around the room as he slowly disappeared.Kylo Ren turned off his lightsaber and took off his mask, then took Darth Vader’s helmet from his closet.“You are my Grandpa, not that guy”, he spoke to the helmet. Kylo Ren was crying a little but he felt better looking at the helmet. Through his tears the helmet looked like a blurry black skull. He took it and decided to sleep next to it but then he noticed he had cut his own bed in pieces trying to kill Anakin’s ghost.
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In the next morning Kylo went to the First Order cafeteria to have some breakfast.When he saw Hux sitting there he immediately felt angry. He still sat down opposite to Hux because he didn’t want the General to think he was scared of him or something. Snoke had taught him to never show fear.“You look like shit”, Hux greeted Kylo.“Well you still look like a ginger nerd” Kylo shot back. “I bet you got bullied a lot as a kid.”It was true. But Hux didn’t let the insult get to him, even though it brought back some bad memories. Unlike Kylo Ren he had self-control. Besides, the first thing he had done when he got into power was to have all his child-hood bullies killed.Kylo looked at his own tray and then Hux’s. Today they had spaghetti bolognese and pancakes for dessert.“Why do you have two pancakes? They didn’t have any left” Kylo said. He hadn’t gotten a pancake.Hux smirked.“That’s why you’re not supposed to take more than one!” Kylo shouted and in his rage he made his fork fly towards Hux.Hux dodged it and took a bite of his pancake, smugly.Kylo Ren flipped over his tray and stormed away as people watched. Their looks burned and Kylo couldn’t take it. Tears were stinging his eyes. After last night he had felt weaker than in years. The Light had started to invade his consciousness and he didn’t know how to stop it. He needed to speak to Snoke. ********************* Kylo Ren stood in a huge room that was like a cave. There was nothing in there except the hologram used to communicate with Snoke. Kylo felt small next to Snoke and he wondered if Snoke was really that big in real life. He had never seen Snoke face to face.Kylo greeted Snoke. The image kept flickering and the sound was pretty bad.“Sorry, somebody smashed the hologram communication system. They are still working on it” Kylo explained.“What do you want to discuss Kylo Ren?” Snoke asked.Kylo hesitated for a moment. He felt embarrassed to admit his weakness to Snoke. But Snoke probably already could sense it.“The Light Side is taking over me” he said “I can feel it. I’m losing the fight.”“Killing your dad was a good move. Don’t you feel stronger?” Snoke asked.“That’s what I thought. But now I just feel weaker. Sometimes I lay awake at night and question whether killing all those jedi kids and joining the First Order was the right choice.”“You must not question it”, Snoke groaned “Anyway it’s a bit too late now to change your mind.”“I know. But last night Darth Vader’s ghost appeared to me. And he told me to abandon the Dark Side.”Snoke fell silent. Kylo held his breath waiting for the answer. The maybe-giant stroked his chin and looked thoughtful.“Vader was strong. But even he had a moment of weakness in the end. Luke Skywalker poisoned his mind. Do not let the same happen to you. You must finish his work” Snoke explained. This made Kylo feel better. This was why he had come here.“But how do I become stronger?” he asked.“Hatred is the fuel of the Dark Side. What do you hate the most?” Snoke asked.“Right now it’s Hux” Kylo said.Snoke was not happy about this answer. He probably had hoped him to say something like “the Resistance” or “the weak Light Side losers” or “my Mom”.“Why can you two never get along? I order you two to become friends!” Snoke ordered.“Having friends doesn’t sound very Dark Sided” Kylo said doubtfully.“It’s okay to have friends if they are in the Dark Side too” Snoke explained and his voice was booming “in fact it makes you stronger.”Normally Snoke would not have said this but he knew that when Kylo Ren was alone he was often crying in his room or talking to Vader’s helmet.“How can I become friends with Hux? He’s boring and thinks he’s so great when he can’t even use the Force” Kylo said. He was still not convinced this could work. Just saying that man’s name made him want to destroy some equipment with his lightsaber. Why was it called a “lightsaber” anyway and not a “darksaber”? He felt like he should ask Snoke but decided to do it some other time. “Tomorrow is General Hux’s birthday” Snoke said “Maybe if you give him something nice as a gift he will like you more.”Kylo hated the idea but he knew he had to do as Snoke said. If he wouldn’t become stronger soon he would lose the battle and be burned to ashes by the Light that haunted him. ********************* “I heard it’s your birthday General” Kylo said the next day when he met Hux in the hallway.“I don’t care. What do you want?” Hux said. He had never celebrated his birthdays because when he had been a kid, he didn’t have any friends. “I have a gift to you.”“I don’t want it” Hux said. He was suspicious. He calculated that this was almost certainly some thinly veiled plot to kill him. “Well Snoke says you have to take it” Kylo said. Hux had no choice but to follow him.Kylo lead them to a weapon testing room. It was basically a big room with strong walls.“Look at this” said Kylo and pulled out a remote controller from his robes. He pushed some buttons and a door opened in the wall. A droid came out of it.It was that kind of round rolling droid, like a half of a football stuck on top of a bigger football. It looked exactly same as the droid Kylo had wanted so bad before except it was larger and black.“If this is your idea of a new weapon for the First Order you are even more of an idiot than I thought” Hux said “It looks like a kid’s toy. What are our soldiers supposed to do with it, make people die from the cuteness?”“You have not seen it’s true power yet” Kylo said an pressed a button.Suddenly a metal appendage stuck out of the droid. But where the droid in Jakku had had a little useless blowtorch there was instead an AK-47 assault rifle. Then another one popped out from the opposite side.At Kylo’s command the droid started to fire. RA-TA-TA-TA-TA-TA-TA-TA-TA-TA-TA-TA-TA-TA. The bullets bounced back from the walls. Then Kylo pressed another button and the droid started to spin around. Faster and faster, the bullets were now flying in every possible direction. Including where Kylo Ren and Hux were standing. “Aaaargh! For god’s sake make it stop!!!” Hux screamed and tried to duck behind Kylo and use him as a human shield. Kylo pushed him away and Hux cringed and shut his eyes, sure that his death had come. But the bullets had stopped in the air.“Ooops. I forgot some losers can’t stop bullets” said Kylo and made the droid stop. The bullets fell on the floor. The AK-47s disappeared but then the droid-arms came out again and this time it was a pair of blowtorches. They were huge and shot out enormous flames. The droid started spinning around again and the flames engulfed it. It looked like a huge, rotating ball of fire, ready to roll over anyone who opposed it’s master.Now that Hux wasn’t fearing for his life he almost had a boner. It was much cooler than he had expected from Kylo.“This is awesome” Hux said “Kylo Ren you are a genius.”Kylo blushed a bit under his helmet. Nobody almost ever complimented him. Maybe Hux wasn’t a total jerk after all. Actually he was pretty good looking.“Thanks” said Kylo “I designed it myself.”“Wait. Since when did you learn to build stuff?” Hux asked, looking at Kylo with puzzled expression.“Uh” Kylo stuttered “It doesn’t matter. So do you think we should mass produce these or what? I thought we could call it the Super Death Comet.”Hux was imagining the flaming Comet mowing down Resistance scum and their families. Now he really had a boner.“We should make out first” Hux said.This took Kylo by surprise. Hux didn’t look like he was joking and in fact it looked like he had a boner. Kylo Ren hesitated for a moment. Was he ready to go this far to follow Snoke’s orders? No, I must do anything to become stronger, Kylo answered himself, even if that means making out with Hux.“Okay” he said and Hux kissed him.Kylo had never been kissed so he kind of just awkwardly stood there. When Hux stuck his tongue inside his mouth Kylo was grossed out at first and almost pushed the redheaded man away. Then he tasted something sweet inside Hux’s mouth which made him think of the pancake thing which angered him again. But Kylo controlled his emotions and he noticed he had started to enjoy this. He pushed his fingers into Hux’s hair and pulled him closer.Just then the door opened and two stormtroopers on patrol walked in. Kylo and Hux didn’t stop the embrace fast enough and the stormtroopers definitely saw them make out. Kylo felt embarrassed. He took out his lightsaber and switched it on but the stormtroopers had already turned away and were quickly making their exit.“Let’s go to my room” Hux said.“Good idea” Kylo agreed “There I can tell you about my idea for a new, black lightsaber. It uses dark energy.”“Yeah, sure, whatever” Hux said and took Kylo’s hand and lead him to his room.