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She didn't know if this journey had purpose - much less an end.Admittedly, gazing over the vast, endless sea in front of her evoked a feeling of closure. The landscape was hypnotic. Banks of dark clouds watching over a troubled sea. A perfect view from high cliffs.People like to say that there is more than black and white, yet they weren't able to comprehend the outright immense variations of grey the world has to offer.In this moment, grasping all the dull colours around her, she was able to do so. She felt every little nuance, yet none of these were made for her to fit in.No shade of grey would embrace her, take her in, keep her safe. She needed to sleep. She needed to drown in her darkness again to dream herself into a life where her emotions weren't too much, or herself too less. A life where it was possible for her to let joy in and cast sorrow aside.Only her dreams provide that and, by now, she would give anything to go back to sleep. It told her that soon, the waiting shall be over - that she would be allowed to have more than a glimpse of the illusive again. And maybe... that was the true purpose of her journey.It felt imminent. The lingering feeling became stronger the closer she got to the Celtic Sea.On arrival, the air around her was thick with It's presence, she could almost touch it.
The sea...
She thought, taking a tentative step towards the edge of the cliffs.
Maybe the sea is calling for me...
She let her eyes wander over the alluring darkness of the sea, comparing them to her silky bed sheets.
What would it feel like to be surrounded by roaring waves?
She wondered if it would provide the same sanctuary her blankets did. For a moment, she thought she saw a figure approaching her from the side, but as soon as she focused her eyes in its direction, it vanished like a distant, dead star - darkening once the eye tries to catch a hold on it.It was nothing more than a glimpse, like everything in her life. She sank to the ground, fingers digging into the sabulous dirt.
Let me sleep...
"You... are real." A bewildered, yet dark and warm male voice echoed behind her. She didn't turn around, fearing that it would vanish again."Did you lead me here?" She asked. The unseen apparition came to a stop behind her. His presence was calming. She wished to see more, but she feared he would vanish again."No. They did." The voice answered, "They told me you were out there. I refused to believe it.""It... I mean... They talked to you, too?" she wondered."They did more than that. They gave me a new life, a purpose and, apparently, you."She felt the slightest brush of a hand against her neck, sending shivers down her spine."Who are they? Who are you?""They are Sleep. An immeasurably old deity. And I am their First, their Vessel." Sleep.The irony didn't go unnoticed.Vessel.She wondered if he was the joy of the life she pictured in her dreams - his presence being as comforting as the world she escapes into. "I don't know who I am anymore." She stated, not quite sure if it was for him or for herself."You are restless. Longing for a place where you can be, someone you can be with." Sleep's First answered, and she knew she never heard truer words."I am." She didn't notice the tears escaping her eyes - vision blurred as a clouded sky."I... I need to sleep." She sobbed."There is no need to escape anymore, my dear."
No dreams anymore?
She slowly lifted her head up and turned toward the enticing voice. She anticipated the apparition to vanish again, but now... she saw a tall man, his naked torso grey, partially black. Behind an elegant white mask his upper face was hidden, head coated in the hood of a long black robe.
Was he the shade of grey that was made for her?
"I have nothing more than this... I need to escape... I need to escape to be able to... Be." Facing the truth took a visible toll on her and it was clear for him to see."This is not true. Sleep can give you so much more. Sleep can give you the life you dreamt of. The life you were supposed to live.""But... How?" She didn't understand it, couldn't make sense of the words he said. Before Vessel answered, he sat down beside her and faced sea."Look at these clouds." His grey, slender finger pointed toward two massive cloud clusters, one darker than the other."When clouds emerge, it is already set that they belong to each other. It is their destiny to wander aimlessly until their paths cross and their beings merge. However, the wind doesn't render it possible for every cloud to encounter their equivalent." The masked man told, now facing the ground."And some are doomed to wander around alone forever." She finished his story."That is what I thought, too. Sleep taught me better." He seemed to gather hope as he continued. "Once the desolate cloud dissolves, it's within Sleep's means to grant it another life.""Does a cloud have to dissolve to get another life?"Sleep gave him a new life, a purpose and... me. She repeated his words in her mind."One way or the other ; it has to happen
It wasn't the sea that called for me. It was Sleep... Or was it their Vessel?
"Why did you come here?" She asked, trying to figure out the reasons of their meeting."Here..." He pointed down to the sea beneath them. "I dissolved. And here is where Sleep told me to come find my equivalent."He seemed hesitant, almost scared, as he offered his hand."This feeling... The affinity that led me here... It was you." She thought out loud, laying her hand into his."Not quite. It was... It was what we were supposed to have... together. I call it Eden. And Eden called you here, to embrace what's long overdue." "Why wasn't it possible for us to meet... before?"As soon as the words left her lips, she already had her answer."The wind... The wind didn't render it possible...""That is right, my dear. Yet the wind wouldn't let us merge with someone we shouldn't be with. I guess you figured it out yourself." Vessel explained, and she knew he was right. All she wanted to feel wasn't refused because of her: It was refused because it was meant to be experienced with someone. A predestined someone.
So it was true.
He was the joy. Her joy.She used to dream herself into a world where clouds crossed paths.Sleep granted her insight in what could be. "All my life I thought I was too much, yet too less. I convinced myself that I'm only able to endure this life if I can escape into my dream. Albeit the dreams were glimpses of what could be when..." She took heart and finally intertwined their fingers.Sleep's First finished her sentence: "...when we finally find each other. As it was set right from the start", he guided her hand to his lips and placed a tender kiss on it."I... I don't need to sleep. I need... We need to merge." She stated – welcoming the life she longed for."You are right. But first you need to find your way to Sleep.""How do I do that?" Despite comprehending, she was at a loss."Do you trust me?" Vessel asked, lifting her up to stand next to him."Yes." There was no hesitation and he led them to edge of the cliffs."I need to dissolve." She understood."You won't be alone. We are here. We will always be with you." Vessel reassured her. She felt no fear.The fall was rapid.The impact smooth.Everything was dark.
"Fear not, my child. I grant you Eden."
Sleep was omnipresent. They were around her, in her. They were the dark.
"Do you accept?"
It was a needless question. She accepted the moment the apparition - the vessel - manifested behind her.This was not about logic or coherent thinking. It was about doing what had to be done.Apparently, Sleep didn't need an answer, they knew.
"You were gifted Eden. For that, you will worship."
She wasn't able to tell whether seconds or years have gone by until she let a fresh stream of air fill her lungs.The wet shore beneath her felt comfortable - like her bedding.His presence all consuming - like her most exquisite dreams.She didn't open her eyes as she blissfully pronounced: "I always loved you."Vessel lifted her limp body up and laid her back against his chest."I always loved you." He sighed and kissed her forehead. "Vessel..." She propped herself on both hands to face him."Let me see you..."His toned body tensed noticeably."I wish not to scare yo..."Before he could finish his pointless statement she interfered: "You couldn't. Never."She knew he was beautiful. She felt it, felt it since he appeared behind her."May I?" She asked, carefully lifting her hand to his face."You may." “Beautiful” wasn't quite the right term for what was revealed once the mask was lifted. She was certain that no human being was able to understand the perfection with which he was created.Under a short mane of dark, silky hair unfolded a chiselled, greyish face.Three pairs of midnight blue eyes, adorned with pale, curved lashes, bashfully glimpsed at her. His plush lips twisted into a sad smile."You are the most precious being that ever walked the earth, Vessel."He clearly didn't expect such a reaction and she noticed, as he closed his eyes in astonishment, his eyes blinking slightly out of sync. There were no words that could describe the gratitude she felt... and, eventually, she let her body speak.As their lips met for the first time, all the unpronounceable emotions erupted.She untied the cords of his robe, while his lips explored the crook of her neck - leaving behind a wet trail of love bites.No longer burdened by their apparel, Vessel used the unnecessary material as a bedding for her. In the sky above, the dark clouds are merging as the lovers do beneath them.